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1
00:00:16,449 --> 00:00:18,649
(upbeat music)
2
00:00:25,759 --> 00:00:27,459
- [Jerry] Joseph,
quiet room, now.
3
00:00:29,229 --> 00:00:30,499
- Oh my god, what's wrong?
4
00:00:30,530 --> 00:00:31,730
Jerry, what is it?
5
00:00:33,566 --> 00:00:35,496
God, Jerry, are you okay?
6
00:00:35,535 --> 00:00:36,695
- Yeah.
7
00:00:36,736 --> 00:00:38,336
- So what's wrong,
what happened?
8
00:00:38,371 --> 00:00:39,311
- I think I have syphilis.
9
00:00:39,339 --> 00:00:40,709
And maybe gonorrhea too.
10
00:00:40,740 --> 00:00:42,240
I really can't tell.
11
00:00:43,476 --> 00:00:44,706
I'm so sorry.
12
00:00:44,744 --> 00:00:46,754
Yeah, yeah, hey, can
you get the fuck out?
13
00:00:47,947 --> 00:00:48,717
Thank you.
14
00:00:48,748 --> 00:00:50,648
- Thank you.
15
00:00:50,684 --> 00:00:52,624
So what do you think it was
something that you ate maybe?
16
00:00:52,652 --> 00:00:54,222
- No, I had sex last night.
17
00:00:54,254 --> 00:00:55,324
- Oh my god with who?
18
00:00:55,355 --> 00:00:56,455
- I can't say.
19
00:00:56,489 --> 00:00:57,459
- Not Christine.
20
00:00:57,490 --> 00:00:59,530
- No, she must be, what my age?
21
00:00:59,559 --> 00:01:01,229
- So was it with a prostitute?
22
00:01:01,261 --> 00:01:02,161
- Ew, no.
23
00:01:02,195 --> 00:01:03,425
- Not Mary.
24
00:01:03,463 --> 00:01:04,403
- No I just said it
wasn't a prostitute.
25
00:01:04,431 --> 00:01:05,271
- Well then who?
26
00:01:05,298 --> 00:01:06,498
- Look, I can't, okay?
27
00:01:06,533 --> 00:01:08,203
She made me promise
to tell anyone.
28
00:01:08,234 --> 00:01:09,304
- It's fine, just tell me.
29
00:01:09,336 --> 00:01:10,396
- It was Tuva.
30
00:01:10,437 --> 00:01:13,207
(upbeat music)
31
00:01:24,417 --> 00:01:27,187
(woman choking)
32
00:01:30,590 --> 00:01:33,290
I mean, obviously I've
had lots of experience
33
00:01:33,326 --> 00:01:37,326
but Tuva can do things I've
only seen possible with CGI.
34
00:01:37,364 --> 00:01:39,704
- Right, who's
got a poorly dick?
35
00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:41,503
- Quintin, thank God.
36
00:01:41,534 --> 00:01:43,344
- I mean, how did this even
end up happening, Jerry?
37
00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:45,310
- Quintin, have you
seen the film Avatar?
38
00:01:45,338 --> 00:01:46,468
- Why, has it turned blue?
39
00:01:46,506 --> 00:01:47,836
- No, but look.
40
00:01:47,874 --> 00:01:49,444
- Oh god no.
41
00:01:49,476 --> 00:01:51,176
- Hey, hey, don't turn away.
42
00:01:51,211 --> 00:01:52,311
I mean, that's just rude.
43
00:01:54,314 --> 00:01:56,624
(Jerry gasps)
44
00:02:02,288 --> 00:02:03,858
Have you seen anything like it?
45
00:02:03,890 --> 00:02:05,490
- Only in livestock.
46
00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:08,333
- Fantastic appraisal scores
47
00:02:08,361 --> 00:02:10,731
off the back of that
NHS scenario, Chris.
48
00:02:10,764 --> 00:02:13,434
- Sorry, where did you
say you were again?
49
00:02:13,466 --> 00:02:14,566
- I actually don't know.
50
00:02:15,835 --> 00:02:19,535
There was one area where
you seem to have failed.
51
00:02:19,572 --> 00:02:20,772
- [Chris] Failed?
52
00:02:20,807 --> 00:02:24,407
- Yes, it was in staff
welfare and management.
53
00:02:24,444 --> 00:02:25,354
- Get out!
54
00:02:26,346 --> 00:02:27,306
(woman coughs)
55
00:02:27,347 --> 00:02:28,207
Why?
56
00:02:29,449 --> 00:02:30,719
- Be gentle please (gasps).
57
00:02:31,818 --> 00:02:32,688
Mother!
58
00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:33,849
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.
59
00:02:33,887 --> 00:02:35,217
Just gonna try again, okay?
60
00:02:35,255 --> 00:02:36,415
- Okay, okay.
61
00:02:36,456 --> 00:02:39,656
- It looks like
subepidermal hematoma.
62
00:02:39,693 --> 00:02:41,703
- Oh my god, is that fatal?
63
00:02:41,728 --> 00:02:44,228
- No, no, no, it's just trauma.
64
00:02:44,264 --> 00:02:45,604
What exactly happened?
65
00:02:45,632 --> 00:02:48,302
Did she punch you in the penis?
66
00:02:50,637 --> 00:02:51,737
- I mean, there was.
67
00:02:53,907 --> 00:02:54,807
No.
68
00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:56,411
- Why is it still erect?
69
00:02:56,443 --> 00:02:57,713
- It's not erect.
70
00:03:03,416 --> 00:03:04,316
- Hey.
71
00:03:04,351 --> 00:03:05,851
- Hey, you all right?
72
00:03:09,322 --> 00:03:11,422
(fart squelches)
73
00:03:11,458 --> 00:03:13,628
- I'm so sorry.
74
00:03:13,660 --> 00:03:16,500
I think I've had
too much baraka.
75
00:03:16,529 --> 00:03:18,569
- You know they're not
suppositories, right?
76
00:03:21,901 --> 00:03:23,301
- Good morning.
77
00:03:23,336 --> 00:03:24,836
- Oh gosh, are you okay?
- Yeah.
78
00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:26,371
(fart squelches)
79
00:03:26,406 --> 00:03:27,736
(groans) Are you okay?
80
00:03:29,109 --> 00:03:32,649
- Good morning team,
valued staff members.
81
00:03:37,484 --> 00:03:40,294
Right, who'd like some raisins?
82
00:03:41,521 --> 00:03:43,521
- Yeah, actually I
would Chris, thanks.
83
00:03:43,556 --> 00:03:45,426
I'm absolutely ravenous.
84
00:03:45,458 --> 00:03:46,758
I had a big night last night.
85
00:03:49,462 --> 00:03:51,562
- So I know that
we've all got a lot
86
00:03:51,598 --> 00:03:52,868
to be getting on with
87
00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:55,739
but I just wanted
to remind all of you
88
00:03:55,769 --> 00:04:00,369
that if ever work
becomes too stressful
89
00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:03,537
and you want to talk about it
90
00:04:03,576 --> 00:04:05,906
or about anything
else for that matter,
91
00:04:05,945 --> 00:04:07,305
I'm always here.
92
00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:10,315
That includes you, too, Evelyn.
93
00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:12,550
- I never find work stressful.
94
00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:14,745
- Well, no, but
if you ever wanted
95
00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:16,888
to talk about something
more personal.
96
00:04:18,458 --> 00:04:19,688
Okay, so.
97
00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:20,756
- I was the first in my
class to get my period.
98
00:04:20,794 --> 00:04:22,534
- It doesn't have to be now.
99
00:04:22,562 --> 00:04:25,402
So I've had an update on the
Dixons car phone data breach.
100
00:04:25,432 --> 00:04:26,832
I do think this is going
to be one for you, Mary.
101
00:04:26,866 --> 00:04:29,566
They've used a 28
bit block cipher.
102
00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:30,972
- That's what my PhD was in.
103
00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:32,614
- Exactly.
104
00:04:32,639 --> 00:04:34,609
And no one else could
bear taking it on.
105
00:04:34,641 --> 00:04:38,351
- Really, okay well it might
take me a little longer
106
00:04:38,378 --> 00:04:40,848
than usual because my
mum's not been well.
107
00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:42,480
She's nearly 90.
108
00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:45,450
- She musta had you
when she was very young.
109
00:04:45,485 --> 00:04:47,945
- You see this is a good example
110
00:04:47,987 --> 00:04:50,457
of something that you might
want to come and speak
111
00:04:50,490 --> 00:04:51,690
to me about.
112
00:04:51,725 --> 00:04:54,825
- I'd really appreciate
that actually, Chris.
113
00:04:54,861 --> 00:04:58,331
She keeps telling me
to go fuck myself.
114
00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:03,398
- Well, perhaps when you've
finished all this work
115
00:05:03,436 --> 00:05:05,806
and removed all the
corrupted files.
116
00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:07,869
- Oh, right.
117
00:05:07,907 --> 00:05:10,437
- End of play today
would be soon enough.
118
00:05:10,477 --> 00:05:12,877
(upbeat music)
119
00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:16,682
- Hey you.
120
00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:38,639
(women cooing)
121
00:05:40,073 --> 00:05:40,973
- Oh.
122
00:05:45,912 --> 00:05:47,752
- Wonder if it's
a boy or a girl.
123
00:05:47,781 --> 00:05:48,651
- Oh gosh.
124
00:05:49,716 --> 00:05:51,076
I can never tell.
125
00:05:51,117 --> 00:05:52,617
- That's the
problem with babies,
126
00:05:52,652 --> 00:05:54,992
they don't have boobs.
127
00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:58,531
- No.
128
00:05:58,558 --> 00:05:59,428
- Hi.
129
00:06:02,896 --> 00:06:04,796
- Hello darling.
130
00:06:04,831 --> 00:06:06,571
- Well done.
- Thanks.
131
00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:11,039
- Hey, I've just been looking
132
00:06:11,071 --> 00:06:12,911
at the Karasimov file,
do we have a contact
133
00:06:12,939 --> 00:06:13,939
in linguistics who
can translate Russian?
134
00:06:13,973 --> 00:06:15,713
- Have you tried Olga?
135
00:06:15,742 --> 00:06:16,942
- I can never understand
what she's saying.
136
00:06:16,976 --> 00:06:18,476
- You know she's Russian.
137
00:06:18,511 --> 00:06:19,981
- Oh is that what that is?
138
00:06:20,013 --> 00:06:21,723
Oh right.
139
00:06:21,748 --> 00:06:23,448
- Thanks for the card by the way
140
00:06:23,483 --> 00:06:26,693
but I only celebrate my
birthday every other year.
141
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:27,890
- Well, that's fine just
keep it for next year then.
142
00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:29,961
There's nothing in
there that can go off.
143
00:06:31,791 --> 00:06:32,661
- Anything else?
144
00:06:34,127 --> 00:06:35,127
- Well, I just wanted
to let you know
145
00:06:35,161 --> 00:06:38,571
that I know about you and Jerry.
146
00:06:38,598 --> 00:06:39,998
- Has he been mouthing me off?
147
00:06:40,033 --> 00:06:42,903
- Oh god, he didn't say
if he'd done that as well.
148
00:06:42,936 --> 00:06:45,006
Sorry, so has this been
going on for a while then?
149
00:06:45,038 --> 00:06:46,538
I only ask just
'cause Jerry seemed
150
00:06:46,573 --> 00:06:47,973
to imply it was like
a permanent thing.
151
00:06:48,008 --> 00:06:50,908
- Wow, okay, well, either way,
152
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:53,014
I just don't like to
sleep with the same person
153
00:06:53,046 --> 00:06:54,046
more than once.
154
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:56,020
I think it's lazy.
155
00:06:56,049 --> 00:06:57,879
- Oh, no, I agree
with that, me too.
156
00:06:57,917 --> 00:06:59,687
God, yeah.
157
00:06:59,719 --> 00:07:00,549
It's boring.
158
00:07:03,823 --> 00:07:05,533
But you never
know, maybe one day
159
00:07:05,558 --> 00:07:06,758
you might find that one person
who you wanna settle down.
160
00:07:06,793 --> 00:07:08,533
- No, that would
never work for me.
161
00:07:08,561 --> 00:07:10,861
- No, no, 'cause you're just.
162
00:07:13,733 --> 00:07:15,073
It's funny though I
was doing one of those
163
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,571
like online harmony tests things
164
00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:21,844
and we actually come
out as 89% I think.
165
00:07:21,875 --> 00:07:24,475
- Yeah, it's that 11%
I'm worried about.
166
00:07:26,146 --> 00:07:27,676
- Then why sleep with Jerry?
167
00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:30,846
- Because I don't care about him
168
00:07:30,884 --> 00:07:32,094
like I'd care about you.
169
00:07:33,586 --> 00:07:34,786
But you're right,
170
00:07:34,821 --> 00:07:36,761
I should let him know
it won't happen again.
171
00:07:39,559 --> 00:07:42,059
Plus he's so not over his wife.
172
00:07:50,904 --> 00:07:53,244
(phone rings)
173
00:07:54,708 --> 00:07:56,708
- Is everything okay?
174
00:07:56,743 --> 00:07:59,813
Well the district nurse
will be around in a bit.
175
00:07:59,846 --> 00:08:01,276
Yes, that's the one.
176
00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:04,084
But you really can't
call her that nowadays.
177
00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:05,187
(glass tapping)
178
00:08:05,218 --> 00:08:06,718
- Yes?
179
00:08:06,753 --> 00:08:09,063
- Hi, Chris, do you have
like 40, 45 minutes?
180
00:08:09,089 --> 00:08:10,689
- Not that long, no.
181
00:08:10,724 --> 00:08:12,864
Is this about the
Buble conspiracy?
182
00:08:12,892 --> 00:08:14,832
- I don't know what that is.
183
00:08:14,861 --> 00:08:15,701
- Thanks Evelyn.
184
00:08:17,630 --> 00:08:19,000
No, can you leave
the room please.
185
00:08:20,100 --> 00:08:20,930
- Oh my god.
186
00:08:23,169 --> 00:08:24,869
- Sorry.
187
00:08:24,904 --> 00:08:25,774
- Quickly.
188
00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:30,081
- So, listen, I don't
wanna name names
189
00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:31,950
but there is someone
in the office
190
00:08:31,978 --> 00:08:34,078
who I've started to think of
as more than just a friend.
191
00:08:34,114 --> 00:08:35,924
- Why?
192
00:08:35,949 --> 00:08:36,979
- 'Cause she's really nice.
193
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,887
- Are you talking about me?
194
00:08:38,918 --> 00:08:39,788
- No, why?
195
00:08:39,819 --> 00:08:41,019
Are you interested?
196
00:08:41,054 --> 00:08:41,924
- Of course not.
197
00:08:41,955 --> 00:08:43,655
So this is about Tuva?
198
00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:44,920
- Oh, I really don't
wanna say who it is.
199
00:08:44,958 --> 00:08:46,658
- Well I'm guessing
it's not Mary.
200
00:08:46,693 --> 00:08:48,903
- Oh, no, no, God no,
no, definitely not Mary.
201
00:08:48,928 --> 00:08:50,758
Anyway, it turns out this person
202
00:08:50,797 --> 00:08:53,797
for whatever reason has
actually ended up having sex
203
00:08:53,833 --> 00:08:55,873
with someone else on our team.
204
00:08:55,902 --> 00:08:57,142
- Jerry.
205
00:08:57,170 --> 00:08:58,100
- I really don't
wanna name names.
206
00:08:58,138 --> 00:08:59,208
- Yes, but surely not Mary?
207
00:08:59,239 --> 00:09:00,739
- No, it's still not Mary
208
00:09:00,774 --> 00:09:01,814
but the thing is this
person is in fact
209
00:09:01,841 --> 00:09:03,081
a very good friend.
210
00:09:03,109 --> 00:09:04,909
- Jerry, of course,
he walks all over you.
211
00:09:04,944 --> 00:09:07,354
- And on top of that I've
just found out he has a wife.
212
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:09,120
- Jerry's married?
213
00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:10,079
- So now I'm beginning to
question do I even know
214
00:09:10,116 --> 00:09:11,216
who this person is anymore?
215
00:09:11,251 --> 00:09:12,751
- Jerry?
216
00:09:12,786 --> 00:09:13,946
- I mean, what do you
think I should do?
217
00:09:13,987 --> 00:09:14,987
Do you think I should
talk to him about it or?
218
00:09:16,256 --> 00:09:19,056
(paper rustling)
219
00:09:37,844 --> 00:09:38,684
- Yes.
220
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:40,980
- Right.
221
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:43,022
It's a yes.
222
00:09:44,017 --> 00:09:45,317
Can I have a raisin?
223
00:09:45,352 --> 00:09:46,252
- Yes.
224
00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:53,831
(Jerry gasps)
225
00:09:59,799 --> 00:10:01,029
- Hey beautiful.
226
00:10:01,067 --> 00:10:02,267
- Okay, so I'm just
going to say it
227
00:10:02,302 --> 00:10:03,272
so we can move on.
228
00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:04,743
- Oh my god you're pregnant?
229
00:10:04,771 --> 00:10:06,211
- It's been less than 12 hours.
230
00:10:06,239 --> 00:10:07,269
- I don't care I wanna keep it.
231
00:10:07,307 --> 00:10:08,407
- No, this was a one off.
232
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:10,041
It can never happen again.
233
00:10:10,076 --> 00:10:11,746
- I don't understand,
you sure sounded
234
00:10:11,778 --> 00:10:13,248
like you were enjoying yourself.
235
00:10:13,279 --> 00:10:15,379
- You know sometimes
I moan like that
236
00:10:15,415 --> 00:10:17,015
when I'm really bored.
237
00:10:17,050 --> 00:10:18,850
- I thought we had a connection.
238
00:10:18,885 --> 00:10:20,845
- You kept calling me Melissa.
239
00:10:20,887 --> 00:10:22,887
- Oh come on, was
it really that bad.
240
00:10:22,922 --> 00:10:25,392
Melissa (sobs).
241
00:10:27,894 --> 00:10:29,004
- Yes.
242
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:30,299
- Fine, you know what?
243
00:10:30,330 --> 00:10:32,100
Actually, I was on
my way to find you
244
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:34,172
and tell you the same thing so.
245
00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:37,140
- So are we good?
246
00:10:37,170 --> 00:10:39,210
- Tuva, do you really think
this is the first time
247
00:10:39,239 --> 00:10:41,369
I've had a one
night stand, please.
248
00:10:41,408 --> 00:10:42,308
- Great.
249
00:10:45,245 --> 00:10:50,175
(Jerry sobbing)
(upbeat music)
250
00:10:52,085 --> 00:10:55,085
- Oh, hi, Jerry, I just wondered
if we'd have a little chat.
251
00:10:55,121 --> 00:10:57,121
- It's actually not
a great time for me.
252
00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:58,357
I'm super busy.
253
00:11:01,094 --> 00:11:02,764
- Did Tuva come and see you?
254
00:11:03,863 --> 00:11:04,963
- You know what she did.
255
00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:07,972
Poor kid.
256
00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,801
She won't leave me
alone, so clingy.
257
00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:13,067
I had to shut that shit down.
258
00:11:13,106 --> 00:11:15,106
I'm actually worried
about her, she was a mess.
259
00:11:15,141 --> 00:11:16,341
I hope she's gonna be okay.
260
00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:20,375
- Listen, if you ever
wanna chat about anything,
261
00:11:20,413 --> 00:11:21,883
just, you know I'm here, right?
262
00:11:21,915 --> 00:11:22,815
- Okay, thanks.
263
00:11:24,117 --> 00:11:25,417
- Maybe you could come
around to mine tonight.
264
00:11:25,452 --> 00:11:28,122
Get my dad to cook
something and we can chat.
265
00:11:30,390 --> 00:11:32,930
- Nah, I think
it'll be too spicy.
266
00:11:32,959 --> 00:11:34,359
- Let's go out, come on.
267
00:11:37,097 --> 00:11:39,227
- Can we go somewhere cozy?
268
00:11:39,265 --> 00:11:42,165
- Of course, the Railway
Inn is super cozy, honestly.
269
00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:43,102
- Is it?
270
00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:46,438
Do they do mashed potatoes?
271
00:11:46,473 --> 00:11:48,843
- I can ask, I mean,
it's very easy to make.
272
00:11:53,413 --> 00:11:54,283
- Okay.
273
00:11:54,314 --> 00:11:55,154
- [Joseph] Yeah?
274
00:11:55,181 --> 00:11:57,151
- Yeah, let's do this.
275
00:12:02,989 --> 00:12:05,389
(keys tapping)
276
00:12:17,137 --> 00:12:19,907
(phone ringing)
277
00:12:26,012 --> 00:12:27,212
- Very nice.
278
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:29,577
Hey, does this turn into
a topless place later?
279
00:12:29,616 --> 00:12:31,376
- I don't think so, no.
280
00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:34,018
- Listen, I'm really glad
we decided to go out, man.
281
00:12:34,054 --> 00:12:35,394
Just us two guys.
282
00:12:38,124 --> 00:12:39,434
- Yeah, do you wanna
just have a seat
283
00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:40,329
and I'll just get
this first round.
284
00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:41,390
What would you like?
285
00:12:41,428 --> 00:12:43,128
- Yeah, I'll have a scotch.
286
00:12:43,163 --> 00:12:45,273
Top shelf, neat.
287
00:12:45,298 --> 00:12:46,498
- Cool, neat.
288
00:12:46,533 --> 00:12:48,973
- No, neat, no ice.
289
00:12:49,002 --> 00:12:50,472
- Yeah, yeah that's neat.
290
00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:52,573
- Oh hey, also, get
another round of whatever
291
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:55,035
those two are having.
292
00:12:55,075 --> 00:12:56,275
- What, for us?
293
00:12:56,309 --> 00:12:57,539
- For them.
294
00:12:57,577 --> 00:12:58,947
- Oh right, okay.
295
00:13:02,315 --> 00:13:04,475
(people gasping)
296
00:13:04,517 --> 00:13:07,087
Hey, Tuva, what
are you doing here?
297
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:09,160
- Hey, you want to
see some magic tricks?
298
00:13:09,189 --> 00:13:10,219
- I can't really.
299
00:13:10,256 --> 00:13:11,356
- Oh come on, pick a card.
300
00:13:11,391 --> 00:13:14,191
- Okay, okay, just really quick.
301
00:13:14,227 --> 00:13:15,127
I love magic.
302
00:13:43,590 --> 00:13:44,460
- Hello?
303
00:13:45,625 --> 00:13:47,255
- I am so sorry, Jerry,
304
00:13:47,293 --> 00:13:48,633
there was a huge queue.
305
00:13:50,130 --> 00:13:51,260
- Where'd you get that?
306
00:13:51,297 --> 00:13:53,267
- Oh, I didn't even see that.
307
00:13:53,299 --> 00:13:54,269
- Cheers, buddy.
308
00:13:54,300 --> 00:13:56,240
- Cheers man, you all right.
309
00:13:57,604 --> 00:13:58,614
This is nice, isn't it?
310
00:13:58,638 --> 00:14:00,038
Just us two.
311
00:14:00,073 --> 00:14:00,643
(Jerry gasps)
312
00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:01,474
Chatting away.
313
00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:02,378
- [Jerry] Right?
314
00:14:02,409 --> 00:14:03,639
- Yeah.
315
00:14:03,677 --> 00:14:05,147
Well, you know, it
just dawned on me.
316
00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:06,278
We've never really ever spoken
317
00:14:06,312 --> 00:14:08,052
about relationships and stuff.
318
00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:11,481
- No, so when was the last
long term relationship you had?
319
00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:12,418
- Oh me.
320
00:14:14,154 --> 00:14:15,364
Probably like my gran.
321
00:14:15,388 --> 00:14:16,318
- Do you have type?
322
00:14:17,691 --> 00:14:19,361
- I haven't really
established a pattern yet.
323
00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:25,404
- You ever hooked up
with anyone at work?
324
00:14:25,432 --> 00:14:27,172
- No not yet.
325
00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:29,240
- Aren't there like 6,000
people workin' at GC HQ?
326
00:14:29,269 --> 00:14:30,639
- Well, yeah, but I mean
I can't access everywhere
327
00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:32,340
with my pass so.
328
00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:34,272
- Yeah, but surely
those odds are great.
329
00:14:34,307 --> 00:14:36,507
I mean, even for somethin'
happenin' by chance.
330
00:14:36,543 --> 00:14:38,183
- Yeah, but I mean I don't
know how accurate a figure
331
00:14:38,211 --> 00:14:39,511
that is, I mean, that
might include staff
332
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:41,476
from GC HQ Bute for all I know.
333
00:14:41,514 --> 00:14:43,524
I don't wanna have to trek
down there every time.
334
00:14:44,751 --> 00:14:47,451
- I'm not makin' you
uncomfortable, am I?
335
00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:48,687
I'm just tryin' to be friendly.
336
00:14:48,722 --> 00:14:49,662
- No, it's.
337
00:14:50,590 --> 00:14:52,230
- What?
338
00:14:52,258 --> 00:14:53,288
- No, it's just nice
hearing you refer
339
00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:54,626
to me as a friend, that's all.
340
00:14:57,230 --> 00:14:58,130
Are you all right?
341
00:14:59,332 --> 00:15:00,502
- You know what, let's
get another round.
342
00:15:01,468 --> 00:15:02,498
- Oh no, I'm gonna get these.
343
00:15:02,535 --> 00:15:03,695
That's absolutely fine.
344
00:15:03,737 --> 00:15:05,607
- Right, then get us
a couple of shots too.
345
00:15:05,638 --> 00:15:06,538
- Neat?
346
00:15:07,640 --> 00:15:08,540
- Yeah.
347
00:15:12,345 --> 00:15:13,245
- Hey.
348
00:15:14,447 --> 00:15:16,077
- So who are you here with?
349
00:15:17,283 --> 00:15:19,553
- Oh, just a couple
of old school friends.
350
00:15:20,587 --> 00:15:21,547
- Those two?
351
00:15:21,588 --> 00:15:24,488
- No, not them two, no, no.
352
00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:25,434
- You want a drink?
353
00:15:26,659 --> 00:15:28,159
- Maybe just like
a really quick one?
354
00:15:28,194 --> 00:15:29,634
- Can we have a
couple of tequilas?
355
00:15:31,564 --> 00:15:33,534
- Yes, it's just a little
bit tricky at the moment
356
00:15:33,566 --> 00:15:35,536
because the, one of the
people that I'm here with,
357
00:15:35,568 --> 00:15:37,798
he's a bit upset 'cause
the girl he was seeing
358
00:15:37,837 --> 00:15:39,337
has just split up with him so.
359
00:15:39,372 --> 00:15:40,242
- Is she hot?
360
00:15:43,143 --> 00:15:44,443
- I find her attractive, yeah.
361
00:15:45,645 --> 00:15:47,145
- Are you going
to say something?
362
00:15:47,180 --> 00:15:49,420
- To you, oh, I don't know.
363
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:51,619
Maybe, I just don't
want him to think
364
00:15:51,651 --> 00:15:55,491
that I've been thinking about
them having sex, you know?
365
00:15:55,522 --> 00:15:56,492
- There you go.
366
00:15:56,523 --> 00:15:57,393
- Oh well.
367
00:15:59,626 --> 00:16:00,756
(speaking in foreign language)
368
00:16:00,794 --> 00:16:02,534
- Right.
369
00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:03,432
(Joseph sputters)
370
00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:04,663
Oh my god what's that?
371
00:16:04,698 --> 00:16:06,468
- You never had tequila before?
372
00:16:06,499 --> 00:16:08,369
- I thought it was like squash.
373
00:16:08,401 --> 00:16:10,441
(upbeat music)
374
00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,540
I am so sorry Jerry.
375
00:16:12,572 --> 00:16:13,572
- Man, what took so long?
376
00:16:13,606 --> 00:16:15,276
- I had to pop to the toilet.
377
00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:16,678
Just I've got the runs I think.
378
00:16:16,710 --> 00:16:18,850
- Well, surely that would
make things quicker.
379
00:16:18,878 --> 00:16:21,408
- Well, there
wasn't a cubicle so.
380
00:16:21,448 --> 00:16:22,648
- Let's do this.
381
00:16:22,682 --> 00:16:23,522
Cheers buddy.
382
00:16:23,550 --> 00:16:24,450
- Cheers man.
383
00:16:27,387 --> 00:16:28,787
(Jerry whoops)
384
00:16:28,822 --> 00:16:29,792
Yeah.
385
00:16:29,823 --> 00:16:31,363
So what were we talkin' about.
386
00:16:31,391 --> 00:16:33,431
- Well, I think you were about
387
00:16:33,460 --> 00:16:35,300
to me about your
last relationship.
388
00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:37,428
- What, no, man,
don't bring me down.
389
00:16:37,464 --> 00:16:38,834
I'm tryin' to get up.
390
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:42,440
You know, you really
should go for one of those.
391
00:16:42,469 --> 00:16:44,299
Which one's your favorite?
392
00:16:44,337 --> 00:16:45,467
- I just wouldn't wanna choose.
393
00:16:45,505 --> 00:16:46,335
- [Jerry] Come on man.
394
00:16:46,373 --> 00:16:47,243
- It's fine.
395
00:16:47,273 --> 00:16:48,273
No, Jerry, honestly.
396
00:16:48,308 --> 00:16:49,778
- Oh they are so
waiting for you.
397
00:16:49,809 --> 00:16:51,239
They're begging for it.
398
00:16:51,277 --> 00:16:52,677
- She's not.
399
00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:54,282
- All right, I'm gonna go talk
to 'em, see what I can do.
400
00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:55,654
Come on, come on,
quickly, quickly.
401
00:16:55,682 --> 00:16:56,552
- Okay.
402
00:16:56,583 --> 00:16:57,453
- Yeah baby.
403
00:17:01,488 --> 00:17:04,788
- So, just so I know, how
much are you willing to spend?
404
00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:05,694
- What?
405
00:17:09,429 --> 00:17:11,459
- Hi Chris just to let you know
406
00:17:11,498 --> 00:17:13,468
that I've finally cracked it.
407
00:17:13,500 --> 00:17:15,370
- Yes, I was just
going to take a look.
408
00:17:16,903 --> 00:17:18,203
I'll let Dixons know.
409
00:17:22,642 --> 00:17:24,282
Is there something else?
410
00:17:24,310 --> 00:17:27,350
- No, no, I should
probably get back to mum.
411
00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:29,220
- Yes, good idea.
412
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,723
- The district nurse
just called and she's.
413
00:17:51,805 --> 00:17:53,805
- Okay, try not to
take this the wrong way
414
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:56,510
but they both have concerns
about your dwarfism.
415
00:17:56,543 --> 00:17:57,743
- Well, that's fine, I
completely understand.
416
00:17:57,777 --> 00:17:58,947
What about you?
417
00:17:58,978 --> 00:18:00,448
- I think I'm starting
to get used to it.
418
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:01,850
- No, are you interested
in either of those?
419
00:18:01,881 --> 00:18:04,421
- No, no, I'm not lookin'
for a relationship.
420
00:18:04,451 --> 00:18:06,391
- Oh what, because
you're married, Jerry?
421
00:18:09,189 --> 00:18:11,359
- Have people been talkin'
about me behind my back?
422
00:18:11,391 --> 00:18:12,631
- Why didn't you tell me?
423
00:18:12,659 --> 00:18:13,459
- 'Cause it's none
of your business.
424
00:18:13,493 --> 00:18:14,933
- Well you told Tuva.
425
00:18:14,961 --> 00:18:17,501
- That was different, all
right, just slipped out.
426
00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:18,970
- Well, Jerry, there's been
plenty of opportunities
427
00:18:18,998 --> 00:18:20,628
when it could've easily
slipped out of me.
428
00:18:20,667 --> 00:18:21,527
- What?
429
00:18:21,568 --> 00:18:22,568
- [Waiter] Sorry guys.
430
00:18:23,803 --> 00:18:24,873
- What else did
Tuva say about me?
431
00:18:24,904 --> 00:18:25,974
- I don't know, why would I care
432
00:18:26,006 --> 00:18:28,406
about how she feels about you?
433
00:18:28,441 --> 00:18:29,341
- Wait a?
434
00:18:30,677 --> 00:18:32,477
You like Tuva?
435
00:18:32,512 --> 00:18:35,482
- Yes, I like, of
course I like Tuva.
436
00:18:35,515 --> 00:18:36,975
Obviously.
437
00:18:37,017 --> 00:18:38,487
Why is that so funny?
438
00:18:38,518 --> 00:18:39,648
- No, it's just.
439
00:18:40,787 --> 00:18:41,887
You deserve better.
440
00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:43,661
- No I don't.
441
00:18:43,690 --> 00:18:44,820
- Hey, I'm just tryin' to
look out for you, okay?
442
00:18:44,858 --> 00:18:46,588
You just said we were buddies.
443
00:18:46,626 --> 00:18:48,186
- Yeah, well buddies don't
keep things from each other.
444
00:18:48,228 --> 00:18:50,658
- Exactly, I mean, I didn't
know you liked her like that.
445
00:18:50,697 --> 00:18:52,567
You shoulda made your
feelings more obvious.
446
00:18:52,599 --> 00:18:53,629
- [Tuva] Hey.
447
00:18:55,001 --> 00:18:56,971
- What, Tuva, what?
448
00:18:57,003 --> 00:18:58,913
- So is Jerry your date?
449
00:18:58,938 --> 00:19:00,438
- Mm-hm.
450
00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:01,473
- Cool.
451
00:19:01,508 --> 00:19:05,248
Why didn't you say?
452
00:19:05,278 --> 00:19:07,478
- You knew she was here?
453
00:19:07,514 --> 00:19:09,024
- Sorry, did I
not tell you that?
454
00:19:09,049 --> 00:19:10,019
- Is this why you
brought me here
455
00:19:10,050 --> 00:19:11,620
so you two can hang out?
456
00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:13,221
- Hang on, I just need
to work out exactly
457
00:19:13,253 --> 00:19:15,463
how this came about 'cause
I'm actually quite drunk now.
458
00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:17,518
- This is how you
try to cheer me up?
459
00:19:17,557 --> 00:19:19,027
- Well, apart from this bit
I'm havin' a great night.
460
00:19:19,059 --> 00:19:20,589
- Me too, I'm gonna go out
461
00:19:20,627 --> 00:19:23,257
to the garden to
smoke some weed.
462
00:19:23,296 --> 00:19:24,256
- [Jerry] Whoa.
463
00:19:24,297 --> 00:19:24,957
- [Tuva] You guys wanna come?
464
00:19:24,998 --> 00:19:26,498
- No, not, my asthma's.
465
00:19:26,533 --> 00:19:28,233
- No, knock yourself out.
- Sorry.
466
00:19:28,268 --> 00:19:30,538
- Cool, later.
467
00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:31,500
- Why would you lie to me?
468
00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:32,638
I thought we were friends.
469
00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:33,872
- Well, you know what?
470
00:19:33,907 --> 00:19:35,637
I thought we were
friends as well
471
00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:35,975
but there's some people who
think you walk all over me.
472
00:19:36,009 --> 00:19:36,839
- What?
473
00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:37,806
What else do they say?
474
00:19:37,844 --> 00:19:39,554
- That you pee sitting down.
475
00:19:39,579 --> 00:19:41,009
- Okay, that's my business
and not all the time.
476
00:19:41,047 --> 00:19:42,617
Okay, sometimes I don't
know what's gonna happen
477
00:19:42,649 --> 00:19:43,679
so I play it safe.
478
00:19:43,717 --> 00:19:45,047
- That you're secretly vegan.
479
00:19:45,085 --> 00:19:46,045
- Oh fuck you.
480
00:19:46,086 --> 00:19:47,546
- That you're weak.
481
00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:48,957
- You think I'm weak?
482
00:19:48,988 --> 00:19:50,518
- Well, you're always talkin'
about how tough you are
483
00:19:50,557 --> 00:19:51,087
but no one's ever
seen it have they?
484
00:19:51,124 --> 00:19:52,064
- Okay, you know what?
485
00:19:52,092 --> 00:19:53,732
Here, you wanna arm wrestle?
486
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:54,890
- I don't wanna arm
wrestle, it hurts my arm.
487
00:19:54,928 --> 00:19:55,928
- Whatever.
488
00:19:55,962 --> 00:19:57,762
- You know what I'm done.
489
00:19:57,797 --> 00:19:59,267
- Where are you, hey,
hey, don't walk away.
490
00:19:59,299 --> 00:19:59,999
I'm talkin' to you.
491
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:01,803
- I'm going home Jerry.
492
00:20:01,835 --> 00:20:02,965
- What a wuss.
493
00:20:05,305 --> 00:20:05,965
- Okay get up.
494
00:20:06,006 --> 00:20:06,906
- What?
495
00:20:06,940 --> 00:20:07,740
- [Joseph] Get up.
496
00:20:07,774 --> 00:20:08,744
- Why?
497
00:20:08,775 --> 00:20:09,675
- We're fighting, get up.
498
00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:10,839
- We're gonna fight?
499
00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:12,877
I'm the one who should
be fighting you.
500
00:20:12,912 --> 00:20:14,082
- Go for it, move your table.
501
00:20:14,114 --> 00:20:15,754
- Oh, oh, you want
help with the table?
502
00:20:15,782 --> 00:20:16,752
- [Joseph] Yeah.
503
00:20:16,783 --> 00:20:17,723
- Yeah, where are we going?
504
00:20:17,751 --> 00:20:18,791
- Just to the right like that.
505
00:20:18,818 --> 00:20:19,748
- [Jerry] There.
506
00:20:19,786 --> 00:20:20,746
- Thank you.
507
00:20:20,787 --> 00:20:21,587
- I can move furniture too.
508
00:20:21,621 --> 00:20:22,291
- [Joseph] Go for it.
509
00:20:23,123 --> 00:20:25,693
- Look at that and this.
510
00:20:25,725 --> 00:20:27,725
Here, there, there,
you have enough space
511
00:20:27,761 --> 00:20:29,761
for all your moves huh?
512
00:20:29,796 --> 00:20:30,656
You little.
513
00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:31,557
- Little what?
514
00:20:31,598 --> 00:20:32,468
- Just little.
515
00:20:33,566 --> 00:20:34,296
(Joseph grunts)
516
00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:35,644
Yeah, sorry buddy.
517
00:20:35,669 --> 00:20:36,999
I'm sorry, it's just
instinct, sorry.
518
00:20:38,004 --> 00:20:39,074
Hey!
519
00:20:39,105 --> 00:20:40,065
Hey!
520
00:20:40,106 --> 00:20:41,776
Okay, can you stop hugging me?
521
00:20:41,808 --> 00:20:42,708
- No.
522
00:20:43,910 --> 00:20:44,980
- Hey.
523
00:20:45,011 --> 00:20:45,881
(Joseph grunts)
524
00:20:45,912 --> 00:20:46,882
- Ow Jerry!
525
00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:48,923
- Sorry, again, instinct.
526
00:20:48,948 --> 00:20:50,648
Come on, get up.
527
00:20:50,684 --> 00:20:51,694
Hey, don't try!
528
00:20:51,718 --> 00:20:52,818
- Ow!
529
00:20:52,852 --> 00:20:54,922
- Yeah, yeah, kick me.
530
00:20:54,954 --> 00:20:56,524
Where you goin' you
little squirrel?
531
00:20:56,556 --> 00:20:58,756
Oh, you're tryin' to
look me in the eye huh?
532
00:20:58,792 --> 00:20:59,962
- Why are you such a dickhead?
533
00:20:59,993 --> 00:21:01,333
- What?
534
00:21:01,361 --> 00:21:02,731
- Well you treat me
like shit all the time.
535
00:21:02,762 --> 00:21:04,862
- I don't treat you
like shit, you're my PA.
536
00:21:04,898 --> 00:21:07,068
- I'm not your PA, I've been
workin' at GC HQ for 12 years.
537
00:21:07,100 --> 00:21:09,040
I'm a junior analyst.
538
00:21:09,069 --> 00:21:09,899
- Really?
539
00:21:09,936 --> 00:21:10,936
- Yes!
540
00:21:10,970 --> 00:21:12,340
Just lose the front.
541
00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:13,942
- Oh you think I
have a front now?
542
00:21:13,973 --> 00:21:15,043
You think I'm frontin'?
543
00:21:15,075 --> 00:21:17,335
- Well why won't you let me in?
544
00:21:17,377 --> 00:21:18,077
- Jesus.
545
00:21:18,111 --> 00:21:19,551
- Come on, why?
546
00:21:23,583 --> 00:21:25,023
- You wanna know why I
won't let you in, huh?
547
00:21:25,051 --> 00:21:27,151
You really wanna know?
548
00:21:27,187 --> 00:21:30,057
'Cause the last time I let
someone in, I shot him.
549
00:21:32,158 --> 00:21:33,858
I lost my best friend.
550
00:21:36,096 --> 00:21:38,666
Is that what you wanted to hear?
551
00:21:38,698 --> 00:21:39,828
All right, are you happy?
552
00:21:43,203 --> 00:21:45,873
(Joseph thuds)
553
00:21:49,809 --> 00:21:51,679
You really gotta work
on your instinct.
554
00:21:54,047 --> 00:21:56,717
(upbeat music)
555
00:21:58,418 --> 00:22:01,048
(dogs barking)
556
00:22:01,087 --> 00:22:03,687
(man snores)
557
00:22:05,225 --> 00:22:06,055
- [Joseph] Jerry.
558
00:22:08,995 --> 00:22:11,025
* Hooray, hooray, hooray
559
00:22:11,064 --> 00:22:12,834
* Misery's on the way
560
00:22:12,866 --> 00:22:16,636
* There are bad times
just around the corner *
561
00:22:16,670 --> 00:22:20,010
* There are dark clouds
hurtling through the sky *
562
00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:23,740
* It's as clear as crystal
from Bridlington to Bristol *
563
00:22:23,777 --> 00:22:25,677
* That we can't save democracy
564
00:22:25,712 --> 00:22:27,452
* And we don't much care
565
00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:29,080
* We'd better all
learn the lyrics *
566
00:22:29,115 --> 00:22:31,615
* Of the old red flag
567
00:22:31,651 --> 00:22:35,791
* And wait until
we drop down dead *
38259
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