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1
00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:24,984
(PEACEFUL, ATMOSPHERIC MUSIC)
2
00:00:37,454 --> 00:00:40,082
(CHEERING)
3
00:00:40,249 --> 00:00:43,378
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
4
00:00:47,673 --> 00:00:50,643
(THEME MUSIC)
5
00:00:50,801 --> 00:00:52,553
Hey, everybody.
I'm James Duthie.
6
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:54,221
Yes, he is, and I'm Chad Bailey,
7
00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:57,562
the sexy roguish new face
of our parent company's effort
8
00:00:57,724 --> 00:00:59,943
to rebrand Sports Desk
for a new generation.
9
00:01:00,102 --> 00:01:01,945
Sports Desk - it's not delivery.
10
00:01:02,104 --> 00:01:03,947
It's Sports Desk.
11
00:01:04,106 --> 00:01:05,733
OK. Uh...
12
00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:07,492
We go live
to Reading, Pennsylvania.
13
00:01:07,651 --> 00:01:09,119
With the Big League
officially shut down
14
00:01:09,278 --> 00:01:10,655
thanks to the lockout,
15
00:01:10,821 --> 00:01:12,494
all eyes are on the EMHL tonight
16
00:01:12,656 --> 00:01:15,330
as the Reading Wolfdogs get set
to take on the Halifax...
17
00:01:15,492 --> 00:01:18,336
MAN: Highlanders, this season,
the big show made it to us.
18
00:01:18,495 --> 00:01:21,795
This lockout means there's gonna
be a whole bunch of big dicks
19
00:01:21,957 --> 00:01:23,459
swinging their way down
to our league.
20
00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:26,253
Play's gonna get faster,
the hits are gonna get harder,
21
00:01:26,420 --> 00:01:28,422
crowd's gonna get crowdier.
22
00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:30,307
You fucking boys
are the Light Brigade
23
00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:33,184
and you're gonna need someone
at the tip of the spear.
24
00:01:33,343 --> 00:01:37,314
- You need a captain.
- Yeah.
25
00:01:37,472 --> 00:01:40,976
He's bled blue and orange
for this team a long time.
26
00:01:41,143 --> 00:01:42,019
That's right.
27
00:01:42,185 --> 00:01:44,734
He's got that shit
that keeps him going
28
00:01:44,896 --> 00:01:47,274
long after he has any reason to.
29
00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:49,068
Let's open that up.
30
00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,831
- Dougie.
- (APPLAUSE)
31
00:01:54,990 --> 00:01:57,709
Time for you to put
this fucker on.
32
00:01:57,868 --> 00:01:59,620
Come on!
33
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:03,666
PLAYER: It looks good on you!
Alright.
34
00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:06,755
PLAYER: A C! Whoo!
35
00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:12,929
(SIGHS) Thank you guys so much.
36
00:02:15,010 --> 00:02:16,853
I've never been
a captain before.
37
00:02:17,012 --> 00:02:19,231
One time, I had a dream
38
00:02:19,389 --> 00:02:21,608
that I was the captain
of a monkey ship.
39
00:02:21,767 --> 00:02:24,020
There was all these monkeys
playing around,
40
00:02:24,186 --> 00:02:26,280
laughing, having fun, singing,
41
00:02:26,438 --> 00:02:28,782
wearing little
monkey sailor hats...
42
00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:31,238
...fighting over life jackets.
43
00:02:31,401 --> 00:02:33,950
Pierce Brosnan was screaming.
44
00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:38,079
I hope one day I can be
the captain of your dreams.
45
00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:41,670
Best wishes, Doug Glatt.
46
00:02:43,914 --> 00:02:46,337
OK, yeah. Alright, good.
Well, we, uh...
47
00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:48,628
Doug, we didn't make you captain
for your speeches.
48
00:02:48,794 --> 00:02:50,546
We made you captain because...
49
00:02:50,712 --> 00:02:53,056
Because you leave it all
out there on the fucking ice.
50
00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:58,182
Ah, this sport is
everything to you, right?
51
00:02:58,345 --> 00:03:01,224
You make me proud
to own this team.
52
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:04,610
I want you all to watch Doug
out there tonight.
53
00:03:04,768 --> 00:03:08,489
Watch him do
whatever the fuck it takes
54
00:03:08,647 --> 00:03:10,365
to get us a W.
55
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:13,277
That said...
56
00:03:13,443 --> 00:03:15,662
Come on!
Let's get after it, boys!
57
00:03:15,821 --> 00:03:18,165
(CHEERING, WHOOPING)
58
00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:23,211
- Congrats, bud.
- Thank you, buddy.
59
00:03:24,413 --> 00:03:26,916
(CHEERING, APPLAUSE)
60
00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:28,504
JAMES: Joining us
for tonight's game,
61
00:03:28,667 --> 00:03:30,169
our own Red McCauley.
62
00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:32,508
RED: Reading City Council
63
00:03:32,671 --> 00:03:34,548
spent a bunch of money
on a new jumbotron,
64
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:36,717
and right now,
it's making everything red.
65
00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:38,977
Go, boys! Go! Let's go!
66
00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:42,101
I love this fucking game.
67
00:03:42,264 --> 00:03:43,766
Halifax and Reading.
68
00:03:43,932 --> 00:03:45,684
Here's LaFlamme dancing
with the puck.
69
00:03:45,851 --> 00:03:47,148
LaFlamme spins. He shoots.
70
00:03:47,310 --> 00:03:48,687
He hit the post!
71
00:03:48,854 --> 00:03:51,528
Now it's LaFlamme again!
He's all over the ice.
72
00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:53,863
Murphy steps into him.
73
00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:57,154
Oh! Glatt absolutely levels
Michael Murphy.
74
00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:58,697
Sorry, Mikey. (GRUNTS)
75
00:03:58,864 --> 00:04:02,334
Glatt's escorted aside by
a couple of Reading Wolfdogs.
76
00:04:04,828 --> 00:04:07,752
LaFlamme. Xavi was flattened.
That angers Glatt.
77
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:10,667
Glatt fires a left.
He fires a right.
78
00:04:10,834 --> 00:04:13,178
- Sorry, Mikey!
- (GRUNTS)
79
00:04:13,336 --> 00:04:15,634
They're falling.
The Wolfdogs are down.
80
00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:19,972
- Sorry, Mikey?
- Shut the fuck up, Doug.
81
00:04:20,135 --> 00:04:22,229
And that is
what friends are for,
82
00:04:22,387 --> 00:04:25,311
especially when your friends
are huge Jewish guys
83
00:04:25,474 --> 00:04:27,021
named Doug Glatt.
84
00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:31,363
LaFlamme takes the puck.
He moves up the left wing.
85
00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:32,898
LaFlamme trying to go
to the outside
86
00:04:33,064 --> 00:04:34,566
as the penalties expire.
87
00:04:34,733 --> 00:04:36,280
Both sides at full strength.
88
00:04:36,443 --> 00:04:38,946
LaFlamme in behind the goal,
takes it into the corner.
89
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:40,785
He circles, looks in front.
90
00:04:40,947 --> 00:04:43,245
Awaiting there is Glatt,
but LaFlamme holds on.
91
00:04:43,408 --> 00:04:45,627
- Jams it. He scores!
- (CHEERING)
92
00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:49,086
LaFlamme makes it 1-0
for the Halifax Highlanders.
93
00:04:49,247 --> 00:04:54,174
- Alright.
- Reunited and it feels so good.
94
00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:57,260
It's a new dawn for
the Halifax Highlanders.
95
00:04:59,758 --> 00:05:02,432
- You're like Captain America!
- Captain America.
96
00:05:02,594 --> 00:05:04,972
New owner and GM
Hyrum Cain's plan
97
00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:07,186
to win a championship
in his first season
98
00:05:07,349 --> 00:05:08,726
starts off with a bang
99
00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:11,020
as the Highlanders open
the scoring.
100
00:05:12,437 --> 00:05:15,691
(THEME MUSIC)
101
00:05:18,777 --> 00:05:20,324
JAMES: Highlanders draw
first blood at the buzzer,
102
00:05:20,487 --> 00:05:23,206
but the real story here is
the physical play.
103
00:05:23,365 --> 00:05:24,241
Doug Glatt,
104
00:05:24,407 --> 00:05:26,910
like a huge Jewish freight train,
doing what he does best.
105
00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:28,875
His tilt with Ross Rhea
still number one
106
00:05:29,037 --> 00:05:31,039
on the hockeyfights.com
All-Time Best List.
107
00:05:31,206 --> 00:05:33,584
He's already proving to be
a difference maker
108
00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:37,425
for Halifax GM and Highlanders
Hall-of-Famer Hyrum Cain.
109
00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:40,340
The other story to follow
is Hyrum's son, Anders Cain,
110
00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:42,601
who's coming off that
career-high season last year -
111
00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:43,885
80 points.
112
00:05:44,052 --> 00:05:46,305
Anders now finds himself
up against his own father's team
113
00:05:46,471 --> 00:05:48,064
in the very first game
of the season.
114
00:05:48,223 --> 00:05:51,022
Anders is the prototypical
modern-era tough guy,
115
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,607
able to drop the gloves
and put up the points as well.
116
00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:56,068
Anders and Xavier LaFlamme
are perfect examples
117
00:05:56,231 --> 00:05:57,824
of the kind of
top-quality talent
118
00:05:57,983 --> 00:06:00,111
this lockout is already
providing the league.
119
00:06:00,277 --> 00:06:01,779
What a great lockout.
120
00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:03,322
No-one ever says that.
121
00:06:03,488 --> 00:06:06,458
I just did, and I'm Chad Bailey.
Sports Desk.
122
00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:09,085
It's sports at a desk,
you lunatics.
123
00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:11,246
Look at this motherfucking desk.
124
00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:15,759
I wanted to thank my big sis, Eva,
125
00:06:15,917 --> 00:06:18,966
for organising
the fuck out of this.
126
00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:20,722
(WOMEN CHEER)
127
00:06:20,881 --> 00:06:22,258
If you're gonna get shittered,
128
00:06:22,424 --> 00:06:25,394
might as well get shittered
at my place of work.
129
00:06:25,552 --> 00:06:26,974
- Place of work!
- (WOMEN CHEER)
130
00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:30,016
Place of work! Place of work!
131
00:06:30,181 --> 00:06:32,104
DOUG ON TV: ...just add
some cheese in there.
132
00:06:32,267 --> 00:06:34,190
Oh, shit! There he is! Dougie!
133
00:06:34,352 --> 00:06:35,729
When it gets to
a certain length,
134
00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:37,273
I just go to the barber
135
00:06:37,439 --> 00:06:40,443
and he cuts it to the length
that I want him to cut it to.
136
00:06:40,609 --> 00:06:41,986
- Thank you.
- MARY: Attaboy, Dougie!
137
00:06:42,152 --> 00:06:45,952
But just to summarise, that's a yes
on mandatory neck guards?
138
00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:50,414
Yes. That's correct. Thank you.
139
00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:52,329
OK, now,
while we have you here,
140
00:06:52,495 --> 00:06:54,873
is there anyone back home
you'd like to give a shout-out to?
141
00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:55,916
Yes, thank you.
142
00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:58,426
I want to say hi
to my one teammate, Eva,
143
00:06:58,585 --> 00:06:59,962
who couldn't be here tonight.
144
00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:01,880
She's my teammate
that can't be here right now.
145
00:07:02,047 --> 00:07:04,470
- My wife, Eva.
- Doug with that big dick!
146
00:07:04,633 --> 00:07:06,306
That's not appropriate.
147
00:07:06,468 --> 00:07:08,596
I'll do whatever my team
needs me to do.
148
00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:10,355
MARY: Yeah, you do!
149
00:07:10,513 --> 00:07:14,234
- Whatever you need.
- (RETCHES)
150
00:07:14,392 --> 00:07:18,067
(LAUGHS)
151
00:07:19,648 --> 00:07:21,946
My beer's back.
152
00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:24,236
(RETCHES, COUGHS)
153
00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:26,871
(TOILET FLUSHES)
154
00:07:29,157 --> 00:07:32,036
(SIGHS)
155
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:40,961
(BABY COOS)
156
00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:42,504
Oh, f...
157
00:07:42,671 --> 00:07:44,048
RONNIE: Fuck's sake!
158
00:07:44,214 --> 00:07:47,809
Jesus Christ. Goddamn it!
159
00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:49,686
No-one wants to skate anymore,
is that it?
160
00:07:49,844 --> 00:07:51,596
Do you want to sit here
and breathe hard?
161
00:07:51,763 --> 00:07:53,140
Dougie, you're on.
162
00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:56,059
I want you to rough up a few of
these Reading cunts right now.
163
00:07:56,226 --> 00:07:58,149
The boys need some inspiration
and you can provide that.
164
00:07:58,311 --> 00:08:00,029
Let's go. Come on! Come on!
165
00:08:01,856 --> 00:08:05,326
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
166
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:11,916
Here it comes.
167
00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:16,413
(SPECTATORS EXCLAIM)
168
00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:18,707
You wanna go?
169
00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:24,592
- (WHISTLE BLOWS)
- Come on. Come on.
170
00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:31,561
(SPECTATORS CHANT)
Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
171
00:08:38,268 --> 00:08:39,144
Yes.
172
00:08:39,310 --> 00:08:40,687
(SQUELCHING)
173
00:08:40,854 --> 00:08:42,276
RED: Jesus Christ!
174
00:08:42,439 --> 00:08:44,112
Anders Cain with
the opening salvo.
175
00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:50,496
- Come on, come on.
- Doug Glatt is rocked!
176
00:08:51,573 --> 00:08:53,200
Cain just keeps pouncing.
177
00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:56,495
(BLOWS THUD)
178
00:08:57,620 --> 00:08:59,588
- (JERSEY RIPS)
- (GRUNTS)
179
00:09:01,249 --> 00:09:02,796
(BLOWS CRUNCH)
180
00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:10,555
- (GRUNTS)
- 'The Thug's in trouble, folks.
181
00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:12,185
(GRUNTS)
182
00:09:14,262 --> 00:09:16,310
- (GROANS)
- (BLOW SQUELCHES)
183
00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:20,769
(GRUNTS)
184
00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:25,532
- (BONES CRUNCH)
- (GROANS)
185
00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:28,193
What has happened
to Doug Glatt,
186
00:09:28,359 --> 00:09:30,407
the champion in so many eyes?
187
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:33,540
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
188
00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:39,292
- You fuck!
- You popped your whole arm out.
189
00:09:39,454 --> 00:09:41,047
Fuck me.
190
00:09:41,206 --> 00:09:43,675
Did I lose?
191
00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:46,962
(HARD ROCK MUSIC)
192
00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:51,258
(CHEERING)
193
00:09:57,764 --> 00:10:02,019
(MICROPHONE FEEDBACK
SQUEALS)
194
00:10:02,185 --> 00:10:06,235
Our boy's moving on
to greener pastures,
195
00:10:06,397 --> 00:10:10,823
but remember,
once a Highlander...
196
00:10:10,985 --> 00:10:15,331
- MEN: Always a Highlander!
- MAN: Fuckin' A!
197
00:10:15,490 --> 00:10:16,912
GORD: This one's for you,
Dougie.
198
00:10:17,075 --> 00:10:20,249
(BAND PLAYS INTRODUCTION)
199
00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:23,711
(SINGS) ♪ Oh, Dougie boy
200
00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:27,923
♪ The pipes,
the pipes are calling... ♪
201
00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:30,930
Jesus Christ,
he's drunk already.
202
00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:35,219
Fuckin' right, man.
Potato fuckin' salad.
203
00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:37,479
- (BEER MAT SMACKS)
- Ow!
204
00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:40,481
You will never eat a meal
in peace.
205
00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:43,234
Animals don't eat in peace.
206
00:10:43,393 --> 00:10:46,272
Animals eat
pieces of dog shit.
207
00:10:46,437 --> 00:10:50,112
I'm not a fuckin' animal, man.
I'm a real person!
208
00:10:50,275 --> 00:10:52,118
- I got real fuckin' emotions!
- Fuck you.
209
00:10:52,277 --> 00:10:53,244
(GRUNTS)
210
00:10:53,403 --> 00:10:56,247
Ow, you fuckin' Neanderthals!
211
00:10:56,406 --> 00:11:02,163
I'm so fucking tired, Doug.
I'm not as fast as I used to be.
212
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,080
I'm not as tough
as I used to be.
213
00:11:04,247 --> 00:11:06,295
MAN: Dougie!
This is all for you!
214
00:11:06,457 --> 00:11:08,630
(LAUGHTER)
215
00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:11,296
How about you?
How much recovery time?
216
00:11:12,797 --> 00:11:16,017
The doctor said that I should
never play hockey again.
217
00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:17,553
Tabarnak.
218
00:11:17,719 --> 00:11:20,347
Yeah, that's exactly
what I said.
219
00:11:23,808 --> 00:11:25,651
And we have a baby coming.
220
00:11:25,810 --> 00:11:29,110
Eva's cousin,
he's got a job opportunity
221
00:11:29,272 --> 00:11:31,445
at an insurance company.
222
00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:36,037
- I mean...
- MAN: Sing Dougie boy!
223
00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:40,617
...I got beaten.
224
00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:42,376
He beat me.
225
00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:45,459
I have to make
responsible decisions.
226
00:11:45,622 --> 00:11:47,169
(CROWD APPLAUDS, CHEERS)
227
00:11:47,332 --> 00:11:49,926
I got you. I got you.
228
00:11:50,084 --> 00:11:52,257
Stevesy, I think
I'm gonna piss myself.
229
00:11:52,420 --> 00:11:57,392
('MON PAYS NOIR'
BY ROBERT COGOI)
230
00:11:58,968 --> 00:12:03,940
Hey! There's my guy.
Stay there. I'll come to you.
231
00:12:04,098 --> 00:12:07,022
- Ooh. Yeah.
- Just stand here?
232
00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:09,153
- Just, uh...
- (BOTH STAMMER)
233
00:12:09,312 --> 00:12:11,235
- I told you I'm coming to you.
- I'm Doug Glatt.
234
00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:13,570
I said I was coming to you.
I can do this.
235
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:16,953
Prostate.
It's like a fuckin' melon.
236
00:12:17,111 --> 00:12:20,615
There we go. See?
Flat, I'm fine. It's the stairs.
237
00:12:20,782 --> 00:12:22,659
- I'm Doug Glatt.
- Yeah. Bob Forbes.
238
00:12:22,825 --> 00:12:24,793
- Ow, my arm.
- Oh, yeah. Hell of an arm.
239
00:12:24,953 --> 00:12:26,500
How excited are you right now,
huh?
240
00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:28,711
Yes. Thank you so much.
241
00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:30,500
- The windows here are great.
- Yeah.
242
00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:32,419
I'll tell you what,
you deserve 'em,
243
00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:35,589
'cause the sky is the limit
here at Cornwallis Insurance.
244
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,132
- Hmm.
- You seen the commercials?
245
00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:38,971
- No.
- Oh, you should.
246
00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:40,510
They're real good. It says...
247
00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:43,226
(SINGS) "Go ahead and call us.
We're..."
248
00:12:43,388 --> 00:12:44,810
You want me to call you?
249
00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:46,475
No, I want you to
finish the song.
250
00:12:46,641 --> 00:12:48,063
- (SINGS) "Cornwallis."
- Oh.
251
00:12:48,226 --> 00:12:51,070
(CHUCKLES) Yeah. There he is.
He's going up, this guy.
252
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:53,152
Get in there.
253
00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:58,578
It used to be a jail.
Prisoners killed themselves.
254
00:12:58,736 --> 00:13:02,661
Doug Glatt, storage room.
That's you.
255
00:13:02,824 --> 00:13:04,201
How's that feel?
256
00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:06,244
You know,
you mentioned you play hockey.
257
00:13:06,411 --> 00:13:07,913
I used to watch a lot of hockey
258
00:13:08,079 --> 00:13:09,922
till it got too exciting
for the old ticker.
259
00:13:10,081 --> 00:13:11,628
I had a massive heart attack.
260
00:13:12,917 --> 00:13:15,261
Yep, I am a sick man.
261
00:13:15,420 --> 00:13:17,297
Anyway, I'm lying on
my death bed
262
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:19,886
and that's when I got bit by
the selling insurance bug.
263
00:13:20,049 --> 00:13:22,347
Yeah, she laid eggs
right inside of me
264
00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:23,887
and now you're here.
265
00:13:24,053 --> 00:13:25,350
- (MOANING)
- I'm allergic to eggs.
266
00:13:25,513 --> 00:13:27,436
You're an idiot.
Nobody's allergic to eggs.
267
00:13:27,598 --> 00:13:29,271
- (MOANING CONTINUES)
- Oh, Christ, this guy.
268
00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:31,027
Come on. Come on.
Come on! Come on!
269
00:13:31,185 --> 00:13:33,779
Get outta there!
Quit! Quit that!
270
00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:36,942
It's like he's showing off, huh?
Nice thick stream.
271
00:13:37,108 --> 00:13:38,610
- Yeah.
- God.
272
00:13:38,776 --> 00:13:40,528
They got a whole alley
to do that in
273
00:13:40,695 --> 00:13:42,447
and then they choose
this window to piss on.
274
00:13:42,613 --> 00:13:45,162
- God, it's like crack to them.
- It's crazy.
275
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:46,827
They also sell crack
at that window.
276
00:13:46,993 --> 00:13:49,496
- Oh. OK.
- Yeah. But don't worry.
277
00:13:49,662 --> 00:13:51,756
It's safe as long as
you get out by sundown.
278
00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:55,927
That's when the hand jobs start.
279
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:00,382
What the...?
280
00:14:00,548 --> 00:14:03,677
('YOU'RE A STRANGE ANIMAL'
BY GOWAN PLAYS IN DISTANCE)
281
00:14:06,095 --> 00:14:08,143
There's a lot of cars
in our driveway.
282
00:14:11,601 --> 00:14:15,071
- Aah! Surprise!
- Thank fuck!
283
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:19,659
I was gonna be in town anyway,
so I thought to myself,
284
00:14:19,817 --> 00:14:21,569
wouldn't this be the perfect
opportunity to organise
285
00:14:21,736 --> 00:14:24,205
a little something
for the two of you?
286
00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:27,083
Oh, I am so proud of you,
Dougie.
287
00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:29,539
You found something secure
and steady.
288
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:33,252
You see? Everything has
a time and a place.
289
00:14:33,414 --> 00:14:36,213
- (CHUCKLES)
- Thanks, Mom.
290
00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:39,346
(SIGHS) A new house, a baby.
291
00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:41,256
I can't believe I'm gonna be
a grandmother.
292
00:14:41,422 --> 00:14:43,095
If I'm being honest,
293
00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:45,635
there was a while where I never
thought it was gonna happen,
294
00:14:45,802 --> 00:14:47,770
what with Ira being the way
he is and all.
295
00:14:47,929 --> 00:14:49,647
- Jesus, Mom.
- Wow.
296
00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:52,150
If it makes you feel better,
I go all kinds of ways.
297
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:54,356
- (GULPS)
- What kind of ways?
298
00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:55,896
Well, if you get me
drunk enough,
299
00:14:56,062 --> 00:14:57,735
I'll munch a box,
piss on an animal.
300
00:14:57,897 --> 00:15:01,276
- I got all kinds of tricks.
- (PAINED GROANING)
301
00:15:01,442 --> 00:15:03,740
Feels like my ass blew up!
302
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:07,282
Hey! There he is!
303
00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:09,200
Nah, nah, come on.
Give me the good stuff.
304
00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:10,744
Give me the... No, no...
305
00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:13,379
- (BLUBBERS LOUDLY)
- Oh!
306
00:15:13,538 --> 00:15:14,915
(BLUBBERS LOUDLY)
307
00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:19,507
(SINGSONGS) Fuckin' mazel tov.
Mazel tov. In your ass.
308
00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:21,046
Oh, excuse me!
309
00:15:21,212 --> 00:15:23,886
- I didn't...
- Oh, fuck.
310
00:15:24,048 --> 00:15:25,800
Sorry, I was just pretending
to butt-fuck my friend.
311
00:15:25,967 --> 00:15:27,344
I don't think we've been
properly introduced.
312
00:15:27,510 --> 00:15:30,059
I'm Patrick Hoolihan.
313
00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:31,768
We've met, you idiot.
314
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:34,855
You wouldn't stop hitting on me
at Doug and Eva's wedding.
315
00:15:35,017 --> 00:15:37,816
Then you fell asleep
and pissed yourself.
316
00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:40,528
- Nice. Represent.
- MARY: Yeah.
317
00:15:40,690 --> 00:15:43,239
- Pat, why do you have a boner?
- You JUST noticed that?
318
00:15:43,401 --> 00:15:46,496
- Wait, what? I have a what?
- MARY: It's nasty. Come on.
319
00:15:46,654 --> 00:15:48,327
- Clean it up.
- Yep, I know.
320
00:15:48,489 --> 00:15:50,082
- (SCREAMS)
- No! Stop!
321
00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:51,743
I'm just trying to
get rid of it.
322
00:15:51,909 --> 00:15:54,753
- Pat always gets boners.
- PAT: Aargh! Damn! Hi-yah!
323
00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:56,459
(CAR HORN TOOTS)
324
00:16:07,091 --> 00:16:08,889
So, how was your first day?
325
00:16:09,051 --> 00:16:14,433
Work? Oh. It...
Oh, it was so fun.
326
00:16:14,599 --> 00:16:17,603
Yeah, I mean,
there was so many documents
327
00:16:17,768 --> 00:16:22,194
and phone calls
to make and receive
328
00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:25,610
and you sit a lot.
329
00:16:25,776 --> 00:16:27,278
Like, pretty much the whole day.
330
00:16:27,445 --> 00:16:31,621
You know, so it's safe.
You know, it's really safe.
331
00:16:31,782 --> 00:16:34,126
Plus, there's a Harvey's
close by, which is good.
332
00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:40,668
Hey. I'm proud of you.
333
00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:42,335
Of us.
334
00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:44,425
We're doing this.
335
00:16:45,463 --> 00:16:48,637
It's... it's a fuckin' lot and...
336
00:16:48,799 --> 00:16:53,976
(CHUCKLES) ...it's crazy,
but we're doing it together.
337
00:16:55,139 --> 00:16:57,813
- A team.
- Yeah, we're a team.
338
00:16:57,975 --> 00:16:59,693
Got each other's backs.
339
00:17:02,605 --> 00:17:04,949
I know it's hard for you.
340
00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:07,610
I mean, I know you miss it
341
00:17:07,777 --> 00:17:10,326
and I miss it too.
342
00:17:10,488 --> 00:17:13,116
I love watching you play,
343
00:17:13,282 --> 00:17:16,161
but I love you
344
00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:19,672
and the family
we're gonna have more.
345
00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:23,505
- (TOILET FLUSHES)
- Ah! Christ. Droppin' loads.
346
00:17:23,668 --> 00:17:28,344
Droppin' fuckin' hot meatball loads
from my asshole.
347
00:17:30,424 --> 00:17:32,097
Hey, Pat.
348
00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:34,262
Just... I was just...
349
00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:37,523
I'm having... I'm having
some stomach issues today.
350
00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:40,352
ANNOUNCER:
Ladies and germs, welcome to
351
00:17:40,518 --> 00:17:42,816
the Bruised and Battered
Hockey Fighting Competition,
352
00:17:42,979 --> 00:17:44,481
proudly banned in 11 states,
353
00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:46,320
six provinces
and one territory.
354
00:17:46,482 --> 00:17:48,530
The hockey tournament
for retired fourth-liners
355
00:17:48,693 --> 00:17:50,570
with only one rule -
356
00:17:50,736 --> 00:17:52,238
no hockey.
357
00:17:52,405 --> 00:17:53,782
You know, I'll tell you,
358
00:17:53,948 --> 00:17:55,621
'Hot Ice' would've been
all over this shit.
359
00:17:55,783 --> 00:17:57,456
Fuckin' kids these days
360
00:17:57,618 --> 00:18:00,918
with their fuckin' YouTube
361
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,832
and fuckin' ISIS.
362
00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:05,969
(SIGHS) I'll tell you what,
I'm into new shit now,
363
00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:07,970
but lately, Dougie,
my new thing,
364
00:18:08,129 --> 00:18:10,348
I'm all about
going fuckin' door-to-door
365
00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:12,508
selling fuckin' china dogs.
366
00:18:12,675 --> 00:18:14,848
Look at this fuckin' thing,
right?
367
00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:16,763
You know, you fuckin'...
368
00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:19,523
You put it some place,
you put it another place,
369
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:21,355
people fuckin' look at it.
370
00:18:21,517 --> 00:18:23,519
It does every... it does
everything it needs to do.
371
00:18:23,686 --> 00:18:25,484
Dope, right?
372
00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:27,023
Dougie?
373
00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:29,863
I keep going over it and over it
in my head.
374
00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:31,653
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
375
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:34,322
He was unlike anybody
I've ever fought before.
376
00:18:35,573 --> 00:18:39,294
He was faster, meaner...
377
00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:42,706
Thank God Eva wasn't watching
when he beat me.
378
00:18:42,872 --> 00:18:46,217
ANNOUNCER: And now,
the main event of the evening,
379
00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:49,299
fighting for
the $400 grand prize
380
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:52,511
is reigning champ
Ross 'The Boss'...
381
00:18:52,673 --> 00:18:55,267
- Rhea.
- ...Rhea!
382
00:18:55,426 --> 00:18:57,394
(LAUGHS) Yep.
You kicked the shit out of him.
383
00:18:57,553 --> 00:19:00,602
He looks like
265 pounds of dog shit
384
00:19:00,765 --> 00:19:02,517
stuffed into fuckin' ice skates,
385
00:19:02,683 --> 00:19:06,608
but I'll tell you what,
motherfucker can still bang.
386
00:19:06,771 --> 00:19:08,569
(NECK CRACKS)
387
00:19:11,859 --> 00:19:13,532
- Hey, Barnsie.
- Boss man.
388
00:19:13,694 --> 00:19:15,913
- How's the shoulder?
- Fucked as usual.
389
00:19:16,072 --> 00:19:17,915
Thanks for asking, though.
390
00:19:18,074 --> 00:19:20,327
Alright,
I'll make it quick for you.
391
00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:21,870
- (BELL DINGS)
- Fuck you.
392
00:19:22,036 --> 00:19:24,539
- (CHUCKLES)
- (SPECTATORS CHEER, WHISTLE)
393
00:19:26,457 --> 00:19:28,585
MAN: Let's go, Barnsie!
394
00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:32,930
- (PUNCH SMACKS)
- Oh!
395
00:19:33,089 --> 00:19:35,968
(BOTH GRUNT)
396
00:19:37,843 --> 00:19:41,222
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYS
OVER SPEAKERS)
397
00:19:45,935 --> 00:19:47,858
- (BLOWS THUD)
- SPECTATORS: Oh!
398
00:19:49,313 --> 00:19:50,860
- You alright, Barnes?
- Urgh! Go fuck yourself.
399
00:19:51,023 --> 00:19:55,745
Jesus fucking Christ,
it's a fucking crime scene.
400
00:19:55,903 --> 00:19:57,655
(SPECTATORS APPLAUD)
401
00:20:06,414 --> 00:20:07,791
WOMAN: I love you!
402
00:20:07,957 --> 00:20:10,210
The Bruised and Battered
competition
403
00:20:10,376 --> 00:20:13,425
would like to thank you
for your continued support,
404
00:20:13,587 --> 00:20:16,261
but we are
especially thankful...
405
00:20:18,884 --> 00:20:21,228
...to the Dartmouth Wig Outlet.
406
00:20:21,387 --> 00:20:23,310
You won't wig out
at their prices.
407
00:20:23,472 --> 00:20:26,066
MAN: Your fuckin' sister
wears a wig!
408
00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:27,602
(SPECTATOR JEERS INDISTINCTLY)
409
00:20:27,768 --> 00:20:29,145
Alright,
410
00:20:29,311 --> 00:20:32,155
I got some people
I wanna thank too.
411
00:20:32,314 --> 00:20:33,816
You fuckin' people.
412
00:20:33,983 --> 00:20:35,610
- (SPECTATORS CHEER, WHISTLE)
- Yeah.
413
00:20:35,776 --> 00:20:39,246
That's right.
I used to think I was done.
414
00:20:39,405 --> 00:20:43,000
Maybe there... there is
a time for everybody,
415
00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:46,003
but when I step out on this ice,
416
00:20:46,162 --> 00:20:47,880
and I see all you
cheering me on,
417
00:20:48,038 --> 00:20:49,961
I know my time ain't done yet.
418
00:20:50,124 --> 00:20:51,501
Thank you very much.
419
00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:53,135
MAN: You're the fuckin' man,
Ross!
420
00:20:53,294 --> 00:20:55,547
(SPECTATORS CHANT)
Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross!
421
00:20:55,713 --> 00:20:58,933
Ross! Ross! Ross!
Ross! Ross! Ross!
422
00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:01,264
(MELANCHOLY MUSIC)
423
00:21:01,427 --> 00:21:03,646
- (THEME MUSIC)
- I'm James Duthie.
424
00:21:03,804 --> 00:21:06,523
And I'm Chad Bailey.
You're watching Sports Desk.
425
00:21:06,682 --> 00:21:08,810
Sports Desk -
we're all pink on the inside.
426
00:21:08,976 --> 00:21:10,728
Oh, Jesus Christ.
427
00:21:10,895 --> 00:21:12,522
Anyway,
Halifax's woeful losing streak
428
00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:14,065
extends to 12 straight losses
429
00:21:14,231 --> 00:21:15,574
to start the year.
430
00:21:15,733 --> 00:21:17,326
They've been in a rut
431
00:21:17,485 --> 00:21:19,453
since their disastrous
season-opening loss to Reading
432
00:21:19,612 --> 00:21:22,411
which saw then-captain
Doug Glatt hospitalised
433
00:21:22,573 --> 00:21:24,496
following what would be
a career-ending tilt
434
00:21:24,658 --> 00:21:26,126
with Anders Cain.
435
00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:30,165
Can the Highlanders find a way
to turn things around?
436
00:21:30,331 --> 00:21:32,459
HYRUM: I bought this team
'cause I win.
437
00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:33,672
RONNIE: I know.
438
00:21:33,834 --> 00:21:35,757
This lockout should be
the best thing that ever happened,
439
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:37,297
but we're blowing it.
440
00:21:37,463 --> 00:21:39,010
We are going after
the biggest names
441
00:21:39,173 --> 00:21:40,550
on this side of the Atlantic,
442
00:21:40,716 --> 00:21:42,138
players you can
build a team around,
443
00:21:42,301 --> 00:21:43,803
starting with Anders.
444
00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:47,940
- Wait. Your son?
- Yeah.
445
00:21:48,098 --> 00:21:51,819
He's been a fuckin' beast
for Reading,
446
00:21:51,977 --> 00:21:55,652
not to mention he almost
single-handedly eviscerated us.
447
00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:57,658
Why are you taking so much joy?
448
00:21:57,817 --> 00:22:00,240
He pretty much ended
Dougie's fucking hockey career.
449
00:22:00,402 --> 00:22:03,246
I think Glatt's career
was ending all by itself.
450
00:22:03,405 --> 00:22:05,624
Well, we're never gonna
know that now, are we?
451
00:22:05,783 --> 00:22:08,286
No offence, Hyrum, OK,
452
00:22:08,452 --> 00:22:11,422
but you and your son are not
exactly Walter and Wayne.
453
00:22:11,580 --> 00:22:14,629
That shit is behind us.
You can believe he won't fuck this up.
454
00:22:14,792 --> 00:22:16,465
He knows what's at stake.
455
00:22:16,627 --> 00:22:20,222
We go all in for Anders,
you're gonna make him captain,
456
00:22:20,381 --> 00:22:23,260
and I'm gonna...
I'm gonna keep his ass in line.
457
00:22:23,425 --> 00:22:25,143
Hyrum, please. Captain?
Let's talk about this.
458
00:22:25,302 --> 00:22:27,396
- Ronnie.
- Let's think about the A...
459
00:22:27,555 --> 00:22:29,023
- Ronnie.
- ...before we get to the C.
460
00:22:29,181 --> 00:22:32,025
Ronnie, you're gonna
coach my kid.
461
00:22:32,184 --> 00:22:34,061
You're gonna build a team
around him.
462
00:22:34,228 --> 00:22:35,605
You're gonna make him captain
463
00:22:35,771 --> 00:22:37,694
or I'm gonna find
some other fuckin' guy who will.
464
00:22:37,857 --> 00:22:39,325
- Fine.
- Good.
465
00:22:39,483 --> 00:22:42,828
Fine. Better than
being on the dole.
466
00:22:43,863 --> 00:22:47,458
('STRENGTH OF STRINGS'
BY GENE CLARK)
467
00:22:57,459 --> 00:22:59,177
- Hey.
- Hey.
468
00:23:00,546 --> 00:23:02,765
- Thanks for coming.
- Thanks for inviting me.
469
00:23:02,923 --> 00:23:07,224
- Welcome. What do you think?
- I think it's...
470
00:23:07,386 --> 00:23:10,265
I think it's all... you.
471
00:23:10,431 --> 00:23:12,308
- As it should be, right?
- As it should be.
472
00:23:12,474 --> 00:23:13,896
- Great room.
- Great room.
473
00:23:14,059 --> 00:23:15,686
Can I get you a soda pop or...?
474
00:23:15,853 --> 00:23:19,107
- Uh...
- Sunflower seeds?
475
00:23:19,273 --> 00:23:21,947
- Uh... Uh, yeah. Seeds are good.
- Help yourself. Uh, sit down.
476
00:23:27,239 --> 00:23:28,991
Sunflower seeds are for winners.
477
00:23:29,158 --> 00:23:30,375
(CLICKS TONGUE)
478
00:23:33,871 --> 00:23:37,296
- Son...
- Sorry. (MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY)
479
00:23:40,419 --> 00:23:41,966
You're carrying the torch now.
480
00:23:42,129 --> 00:23:45,053
- Yes, sir.
- You're the one. (CLICKS TONGUE)
481
00:23:45,215 --> 00:23:47,513
- Over to you.
- Holding the torch.
482
00:23:47,676 --> 00:23:51,226
Our name's on your back.
Our family.
483
00:23:51,388 --> 00:23:54,983
Our family, and, actually,
um, Mom was asking if...
484
00:23:55,142 --> 00:23:57,395
Our name is a currency
in this town.
485
00:23:57,561 --> 00:23:58,938
Absolutely.
486
00:23:59,104 --> 00:24:02,028
I don't want you to fuck this up.
Not this time.
487
00:24:02,191 --> 00:24:05,445
This season's everything.
The world is watching.
488
00:24:05,611 --> 00:24:07,739
Maybe not the world.
489
00:24:07,905 --> 00:24:10,328
I mean, Canada, probably, but...
490
00:24:10,491 --> 00:24:13,495
And, like, three or four states.
491
00:24:13,661 --> 00:24:14,913
Stand up.
492
00:24:18,499 --> 00:24:19,876
- I'm giving you the C.
- Yeah.
493
00:24:20,042 --> 00:24:21,464
- You're gonna prove me right.
- Yes, sir.
494
00:24:21,627 --> 00:24:23,049
- You're gonna win.
- Gonna win.
495
00:24:23,212 --> 00:24:25,886
- Stay the fuck out of trouble.
- Therapy worked this time.
496
00:24:27,967 --> 00:24:30,140
- I don't wanna hear about that.
- I won't talk about it.
497
00:24:30,302 --> 00:24:32,270
- That's for your mom.
- Yes, sir.
498
00:24:32,429 --> 00:24:33,806
- That's shit for your mom.
- Yes, sir.
499
00:24:33,973 --> 00:24:36,146
Don't bring shit up like that.
500
00:24:36,308 --> 00:24:39,061
MAN ON TV: You don't know
nothing about good times.
501
00:24:39,228 --> 00:24:42,232
Let me tell you
about fuckin' good times.
502
00:24:42,398 --> 00:24:46,073
I remember that summer
like it was yesterday.
503
00:24:46,235 --> 00:24:49,865
Good music, nice heat,
great friends,
504
00:24:50,030 --> 00:24:51,657
and one night
me and my friends -
505
00:24:51,824 --> 00:24:57,331
my great friends -
went for hamburgers downtown.
506
00:24:57,496 --> 00:25:00,466
That summer,
we ruled the world.
507
00:25:00,624 --> 00:25:03,002
We thought we was the kings.
508
00:25:03,168 --> 00:25:05,466
Turns out we was the jokers.
509
00:25:05,629 --> 00:25:07,973
MAN 2 ON TV: Look what
the fucking cat dragged in!
510
00:25:09,008 --> 00:25:11,010
Love this fuckin' guy.
511
00:25:11,176 --> 00:25:14,601
(GENTLE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
512
00:25:31,113 --> 00:25:34,242
(EDGY ROCK MUSIC)
513
00:26:01,852 --> 00:26:04,150
He has hair like a lion.
514
00:26:06,065 --> 00:26:07,612
RONNIE: Bring it in!
Bring it in!
515
00:26:09,068 --> 00:26:10,536
OK, boys,
516
00:26:10,694 --> 00:26:13,038
we kind of fucked up
the start of this thing, eh?
517
00:26:13,197 --> 00:26:14,699
So now, we got a few lads
518
00:26:14,865 --> 00:26:16,959
who earn their wages
up at the big show
519
00:26:17,117 --> 00:26:19,540
down here with us
wearing our jerseys.
520
00:26:19,703 --> 00:26:22,707
- Jean Pierre Finch.
- Yo.
521
00:26:22,873 --> 00:26:26,127
We got, uh, Pet...
Petr 'Petri Dish' Petrov.
522
00:26:26,293 --> 00:26:28,842
- A lot of Ps.
- (SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
523
00:26:29,004 --> 00:26:31,974
- What's he doing?
- He's handing out candy.
524
00:26:32,132 --> 00:26:33,975
- Candy?
- (SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
525
00:26:34,134 --> 00:26:36,512
It's a Slovak tradition, maybe?
526
00:26:36,678 --> 00:26:38,225
Better be.
527
00:26:39,598 --> 00:26:41,191
Oh, my God.
528
00:26:43,519 --> 00:26:45,988
- (SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
- OK. And Anders Cain.
529
00:26:47,940 --> 00:26:50,739
OK. Super-duper.
530
00:26:50,901 --> 00:26:53,620
OK, now that Dougie's retired,
we need a new captain,
531
00:26:53,779 --> 00:26:58,831
and I cannot think of
a better leadership tandem
532
00:26:58,992 --> 00:27:01,711
than Xavier LaFlamme with the A,
533
00:27:01,870 --> 00:27:03,292
Anders Cain as captain.
534
00:27:03,455 --> 00:27:05,002
- There you go. Alright.
- (HOCKEY STICKS CLACK)
535
00:27:12,172 --> 00:27:13,549
Alright.
536
00:27:13,715 --> 00:27:15,763
This ice is shit. Fix it.
537
00:27:15,926 --> 00:27:17,553
Perhaps the new captain
538
00:27:17,719 --> 00:27:19,938
would like to say a few words
to his team.
539
00:27:21,306 --> 00:27:22,683
- You'll be alright, son.
- Right. Right.
540
00:27:22,850 --> 00:27:24,227
(MUMBLES INDISTINCTLY)
541
00:27:24,393 --> 00:27:28,068
Nothing else fucking matters
if we don't win.
542
00:27:28,230 --> 00:27:32,235
If they brought me here to win,
my dad brought me here to win,
543
00:27:32,401 --> 00:27:34,449
that's what
we're gonna fuckin' do.
544
00:27:34,611 --> 00:27:36,113
Anybody here like
fuckin' sunflower seeds?
545
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:38,032
Well, this bar and sunflower seeds
are fuckin' winners.
546
00:27:38,198 --> 00:27:40,041
- Hey, hey...
- Fuck, yeah!
547
00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:42,077
- Great. That's good. Yeah.
- Fucking right, Dad.
548
00:27:42,244 --> 00:27:43,587
- Right?
- Right.
549
00:27:46,081 --> 00:27:49,426
I know many of you are veterans.
550
00:27:49,585 --> 00:27:52,054
Many of you are old friends.
551
00:27:52,212 --> 00:27:53,714
Many of you have never worn
another sweater.
552
00:27:53,881 --> 00:27:56,475
I'm here to tell you
all of that gets you nothing.
553
00:27:56,633 --> 00:27:57,509
(GRUNTS)
554
00:27:57,676 --> 00:28:00,725
Produce, you will be rewarded.
Don't, you'll be sent packing.
555
00:28:00,888 --> 00:28:03,016
It's a buyers' market out there,
so for most of you,
556
00:28:03,182 --> 00:28:04,559
that's your fucking career gone.
557
00:28:04,725 --> 00:28:08,104
('WEAPON' BY MATTHEW GOOD)
558
00:28:08,270 --> 00:28:09,487
(PLAYERS CHEER)
559
00:28:09,646 --> 00:28:11,398
You fucked up
the first part of this season.
560
00:28:11,565 --> 00:28:13,238
Find a way to be relevant!
561
00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:16,244
Make yourself fucking relevant
562
00:28:16,403 --> 00:28:18,781
- because from this point on...
- Fuck!
563
00:28:18,947 --> 00:28:20,699
...from where
I'm fucking standing...
564
00:28:23,577 --> 00:28:24,920
Ah, fuck!
565
00:28:25,078 --> 00:28:26,455
...it's Darwin.
566
00:28:26,622 --> 00:28:28,966
RONNIE: Come on, guys!
I'm paying my rent here!
567
00:28:29,124 --> 00:28:30,501
Real hockey, guys!
568
00:28:30,667 --> 00:28:35,798
Hey! You! Look alive, man!
Who the fuck is Darwin?
569
00:28:39,760 --> 00:28:41,683
(SENTIMENTAL MUSIC)
570
00:28:41,845 --> 00:28:43,893
(CAT YOWLS, SCREECHES
IN DISTANCE)
571
00:28:44,056 --> 00:28:45,649
(LOUD CLATTERING NEARBY)
572
00:28:48,727 --> 00:28:51,856
(MAN MOANS, LIQUID GUSHES)
573
00:28:57,194 --> 00:28:58,912
REPORTER ON VIDEO:
Anders, new team, new city.
574
00:28:59,071 --> 00:29:00,448
Any message to the fans?
575
00:29:00,614 --> 00:29:03,709
They brought me here to win.
576
00:29:03,867 --> 00:29:05,244
REPORTER:
Care to confirm or deny
577
00:29:05,410 --> 00:29:07,128
the rumours of your captaincy?
578
00:29:12,209 --> 00:29:13,586
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
579
00:29:13,752 --> 00:29:15,595
It's my team now.
580
00:29:15,754 --> 00:29:18,132
REPORTER: Xavier LaFlamme
declined to comment.
581
00:29:23,679 --> 00:29:26,808
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC CONTINUES)
582
00:29:29,226 --> 00:29:32,355
- (BONES CRUNCH)
- Argh! (SIGHS)
583
00:29:51,331 --> 00:29:53,504
- (BELL CHIMES)
- Whoa.
584
00:29:53,667 --> 00:29:56,887
- What's the bag for?
- These are just documents.
585
00:29:57,045 --> 00:29:58,718
This is a huge bag
full of documents.
586
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:00,848
I'm going to
the insurance festival.
587
00:30:01,008 --> 00:30:02,476
Huh?
588
00:30:02,634 --> 00:30:04,682
Well, I gotta go, Eva.
It's real late. 'Bye.
589
00:30:06,263 --> 00:30:09,858
What... the fuck?
590
00:30:12,060 --> 00:30:14,233
(HINGES SQUEAK)
591
00:30:23,030 --> 00:30:24,577
(DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE)
592
00:30:36,752 --> 00:30:38,425
Hello, sir.
593
00:30:42,007 --> 00:30:44,886
Holy shit on Mary's tits.
594
00:30:45,052 --> 00:30:47,726
The fuck are you doing here?
595
00:30:49,431 --> 00:30:50,978
I came here to see you.
596
00:30:55,103 --> 00:30:57,902
I got injured. My right arm.
597
00:30:58,065 --> 00:30:59,783
Yeah, I saw that.
598
00:30:59,941 --> 00:31:02,069
Hard lad, is Anders Cain.
599
00:31:04,279 --> 00:31:06,202
So, what are you doing
with the hockey bag?
600
00:31:09,826 --> 00:31:13,000
- I wanna be a Highlander again.
- Oh, Jesus, kid.
601
00:31:15,123 --> 00:31:18,718
- Will you train me?
- Train you to what?
602
00:31:18,877 --> 00:31:21,300
- Teach me to fight with my left.
- (LAUGHS)
603
00:31:21,463 --> 00:31:22,840
Teach me to skate better.
604
00:31:23,006 --> 00:31:25,509
What the fuck do I know
about skating, Doug?
605
00:31:25,675 --> 00:31:27,598
You see what I do in there.
606
00:31:29,137 --> 00:31:33,563
We can train another time
if you're not able to right now.
607
00:31:33,725 --> 00:31:36,604
There's a restaurant nearby
that sells hot dogs.
608
00:31:36,770 --> 00:31:38,147
We could just eat those instead.
609
00:31:38,313 --> 00:31:39,530
Hot dogs?
610
00:31:39,689 --> 00:31:41,191
Yeah, it's like
a sausage sandwich.
611
00:31:41,358 --> 00:31:42,860
I know what
a fuckin' hot dog is.
612
00:31:43,026 --> 00:31:44,573
It looks like a penis.
613
00:31:45,946 --> 00:31:47,493
Jesus Christ.
614
00:31:49,574 --> 00:31:50,666
Alright.
615
00:31:50,826 --> 00:31:53,204
20 minutes. We go in there,
get it out of your system.
616
00:31:53,370 --> 00:31:56,340
- Then you go right home, eh?
- Thank you, sir.
617
00:31:58,875 --> 00:32:01,719
Oh, goddamn it. Not again!
618
00:32:03,130 --> 00:32:04,848
- They better not have fuckin'...
- (DOOR RATTLES)
619
00:32:05,006 --> 00:32:08,101
- (LIGHTS POWER DOWN)
- Aw, shit!
620
00:32:09,928 --> 00:32:12,147
I left my fuckin' bus pass
in there.
621
00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:16,234
I need my fuckin' bus pass!
622
00:32:16,393 --> 00:32:19,772
- What time is it?
- 11:37.
623
00:32:19,938 --> 00:32:21,485
Wait.
624
00:32:23,066 --> 00:32:24,443
11:38.
625
00:32:24,609 --> 00:32:28,159
- Did you just get home?
- Yeah.
626
00:32:28,321 --> 00:32:30,824
The insurance carnival was long.
627
00:32:30,991 --> 00:32:31,867
Mm.
628
00:32:32,033 --> 00:32:35,754
I was meeting all these people
who do insurance.
629
00:32:36,955 --> 00:32:39,674
It's really safe.
630
00:32:39,833 --> 00:32:41,585
It's a real thing.
631
00:32:41,751 --> 00:32:44,425
It doesn't sound like
a real thing.
632
00:32:44,588 --> 00:32:49,560
- Uh... It...
- Mmm. You smell like hot dogs.
633
00:32:52,512 --> 00:32:54,355
Thank you.
634
00:32:57,184 --> 00:33:00,233
('DARE' BY VINCE DICOLA
AND SCOTT SHELLY)
635
00:33:00,395 --> 00:33:03,069
(CLOCK TICKS RAPIDLY)
636
00:33:03,231 --> 00:33:05,199
(BELL TOLLS)
637
00:33:06,276 --> 00:33:08,620
- (GRUNTS)
- ROSS: That's it. Rotate.
638
00:33:08,778 --> 00:33:11,076
Rotate. Alright, now give me
that left across.
639
00:33:11,239 --> 00:33:14,038
SONG: ♪ Sometimes when
your hopes have all been shattered
640
00:33:14,201 --> 00:33:16,920
♪ There's nowhere to turn
641
00:33:18,079 --> 00:33:21,549
♪ You wonder how
you'll keep going... ♪
642
00:33:21,708 --> 00:33:24,302
RED: Halifax Highlanders
and the Hamilton Steelers.
643
00:33:24,461 --> 00:33:25,838
Now LaFlamme's
just hammered in the corner.
644
00:33:26,004 --> 00:33:27,551
He's run into and checked.
645
00:33:27,714 --> 00:33:29,682
- Sorry. Take a second.
- Tagged ya.
646
00:33:29,841 --> 00:33:31,263
- Tagged ya again.
- Sorry, bud.
647
00:33:31,426 --> 00:33:32,973
Stop fuckin' saying sorry.
I'm kickin' your ass, boy.
648
00:33:33,136 --> 00:33:34,888
Now Dupere digs the puck
out of the corner.
649
00:33:35,055 --> 00:33:37,433
Moves into the back! He scores!
650
00:33:37,599 --> 00:33:39,146
(SPECTATORS BOO AND JEER)
651
00:33:39,309 --> 00:33:41,732
Whatever, man. I could have
stopped that with your dick.
652
00:33:41,895 --> 00:33:43,613
And it is a 3-0 lead
653
00:33:43,772 --> 00:33:45,570
for Hamilton over Halifax.
654
00:33:46,608 --> 00:33:49,236
- (COUGHS)
- Uppercut.
655
00:33:49,402 --> 00:33:50,449
♪ Dare
656
00:33:50,612 --> 00:33:54,412
♪ Dare to keep
all your dreams alive... ♪
657
00:33:54,574 --> 00:33:56,121
(SIGHS)
658
00:33:56,284 --> 00:33:58,378
♪ It's time to take a stand... ♪
659
00:33:58,537 --> 00:33:59,504
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
660
00:33:59,663 --> 00:34:01,882
The newest Highlander,
Anders Cain, scores!
661
00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:02,916
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
662
00:34:03,083 --> 00:34:04,460
Brilliant individual effort
663
00:34:04,626 --> 00:34:06,253
by Anders Cain.
664
00:34:06,419 --> 00:34:08,467
Uh... uh... Keep it down, Dougie.
665
00:34:08,630 --> 00:34:10,974
For fuck's sake, how many times
do I have to tell you?
666
00:34:11,132 --> 00:34:12,509
Just the left!
667
00:34:12,676 --> 00:34:14,178
(BLOWS THUD)
668
00:34:14,344 --> 00:34:16,096
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
669
00:34:16,263 --> 00:34:18,140
Put some heat on it, boy.
670
00:34:18,306 --> 00:34:20,809
There you go!
That's the one I'm lookin' for.
671
00:34:20,976 --> 00:34:23,946
Here's Anders Cain.
He scores!
672
00:34:24,104 --> 00:34:25,947
Anders Cain and... Uh-oh!
673
00:34:26,106 --> 00:34:28,905
Just like that,
down goes Davinsky!
674
00:34:29,067 --> 00:34:29,943
Ah, Christ!
675
00:34:30,110 --> 00:34:31,862
And he'll head straight to
the penalty box.
676
00:34:32,028 --> 00:34:33,450
Fuck you!
677
00:34:35,240 --> 00:34:36,492
And now the...
(SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
678
00:34:36,658 --> 00:34:38,160
- Score!
- Fuck!
679
00:34:38,326 --> 00:34:39,703
Ah. Damn it.
680
00:34:39,869 --> 00:34:41,371
JAMES: Well past the midpoint
of the season,
681
00:34:41,538 --> 00:34:43,757
Cain and the Highlanders
are their own worst enemies
682
00:34:43,915 --> 00:34:45,508
as they remain in
the play-off bubble.
683
00:34:45,667 --> 00:34:47,214
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
684
00:34:50,297 --> 00:34:52,299
♪ Dare... ♪
685
00:34:54,009 --> 00:34:57,684
Yeah! You're workin'
your ass off, kid.
686
00:34:57,846 --> 00:34:59,814
There's a ceiling
on your skating,
687
00:34:59,973 --> 00:35:02,317
and that left hand's never gonna be
as strong as your right,
688
00:35:02,475 --> 00:35:04,523
but trust me,
it'll fuck somebody up.
689
00:35:05,854 --> 00:35:08,152
Listen, Dougie, there's
something you might wanna know.
690
00:35:08,315 --> 00:35:10,784
The shitshow's movin'.
691
00:35:10,942 --> 00:35:13,695
Next Bruised and Battered's
gonna be at the MetroCentre.
692
00:35:15,113 --> 00:35:17,536
You want to be a Highlander,
that's your ticket.
693
00:35:17,699 --> 00:35:19,326
There's your audition, boy.
694
00:35:19,492 --> 00:35:20,869
Hyrum's gonna be watchin'.
695
00:35:21,036 --> 00:35:23,960
You can show him and everyone else
you're still fucking here.
696
00:35:24,122 --> 00:35:25,874
What do you say?
697
00:35:28,418 --> 00:35:29,920
JAMES: While they keep finding
ways to win,
698
00:35:30,086 --> 00:35:32,430
the Highlanders keep
finding ways to lose too.
699
00:35:32,589 --> 00:35:33,966
Many are blaming
the hot-and-cold play
700
00:35:34,132 --> 00:35:35,304
of Anders Cain,
701
00:35:35,467 --> 00:35:37,060
who sits 31st in scoring
702
00:35:37,218 --> 00:35:39,016
but leads the league
in penalty minutes.
703
00:35:39,179 --> 00:35:41,978
We've dropped 8 of the last 10.
704
00:35:42,140 --> 00:35:44,063
We take penalties away,
other teams change lines.
705
00:35:44,225 --> 00:35:47,320
- I'm trying.
- What do I say?
706
00:35:49,022 --> 00:35:51,992
Don't fucking try. Fucking win.
707
00:35:53,234 --> 00:35:55,532
Wake them the fuck up, alright?
708
00:35:55,695 --> 00:35:57,447
Wake 'em the fuck up. Yes, sir.
709
00:35:57,614 --> 00:36:00,163
Good.
710
00:36:00,325 --> 00:36:02,578
Lead these guys.
711
00:36:02,744 --> 00:36:04,121
That tie is too short, Chad.
712
00:36:04,287 --> 00:36:07,006
Or I know exactly what the fuck
I'm doing, James!
713
00:36:07,165 --> 00:36:08,542
Sports Desk -
714
00:36:08,708 --> 00:36:12,303
we know exactly what the fuck
we're doing, James.
715
00:36:12,462 --> 00:36:13,930
EVA: Oh, my gosh. Thank God.
716
00:36:14,089 --> 00:36:16,012
It feels so good
to be out of the house,
717
00:36:16,174 --> 00:36:18,097
and I am so excited
about this restaurant.
718
00:36:18,259 --> 00:36:22,139
Me and the baby are gonna eat
the shit out of some pad thai.
719
00:36:22,305 --> 00:36:24,558
Oh, why are we taking
the long way? It's not...
720
00:36:27,310 --> 00:36:28,482
(MEN LAUGH)
721
00:36:28,645 --> 00:36:31,148
Doug, do you want to go in
and say a quick hello?
722
00:36:31,314 --> 00:36:33,487
Well, I'll be honest,
I already ate and I'm already drunk,
723
00:36:33,650 --> 00:36:35,277
so the bar
seems to make sense.
724
00:36:35,443 --> 00:36:37,036
For fuck's sake!
725
00:36:37,195 --> 00:36:39,448
Man, it feels like
it was fuckin' yesterday
726
00:36:39,614 --> 00:36:42,083
that I was working here,
727
00:36:42,242 --> 00:36:44,165
bartender,
boyfriend who played hockey.
728
00:36:44,327 --> 00:36:45,704
Yep.
729
00:36:45,870 --> 00:36:48,669
Now I'm pregnant and married
to a guy who says we're a team,
730
00:36:48,832 --> 00:36:51,176
but he's always gone
and feels he has to hide the fact
731
00:36:51,334 --> 00:36:52,711
that he eats hot dogs.
732
00:36:52,877 --> 00:36:55,255
What the fuck happened?
Are we these people now?
733
00:36:55,422 --> 00:36:56,890
This is... this is who we are?
734
00:36:57,048 --> 00:36:59,426
Oh, yeah, that's us.
You and me, baby.
735
00:36:59,592 --> 00:37:02,766
- No, me and... me and Doug are...
- (SIGHS) I gotta take a piss.
736
00:37:02,929 --> 00:37:04,602
- OK.
- I still got my jacket on.
737
00:37:04,764 --> 00:37:06,732
- (LAUGHS)
- (CHUCKLES)
738
00:37:06,891 --> 00:37:09,940
- Get me another beer.
- Yep.
739
00:37:10,103 --> 00:37:11,946
So, Dougie,
how's that new job going?
740
00:37:12,105 --> 00:37:14,608
Oh, it... it's so... fun.
741
00:37:14,774 --> 00:37:19,575
Yeah, there's... there's all
these documents, you know?
742
00:37:19,738 --> 00:37:22,082
I get to bring a thermos
to work,
743
00:37:22,240 --> 00:37:24,288
which keeps my food
hot and cold.
744
00:37:24,451 --> 00:37:27,250
Sometimes
I put hamburgers in there.
745
00:37:27,412 --> 00:37:29,460
It's up to me.
746
00:37:30,623 --> 00:37:33,718
The way we're playing,
we're all gonna need a new job soon.
747
00:37:33,877 --> 00:37:36,972
I suppose I could go back to
Pentecostal summer camp
748
00:37:37,130 --> 00:37:38,848
with my cousin's boyfriend.
749
00:37:39,007 --> 00:37:42,181
I'm gonna have to move back
with Mum.
750
00:37:42,343 --> 00:37:44,641
And don't get me wrong,
I love her to bits,
751
00:37:44,804 --> 00:37:47,398
but that bedpan fills up
fuckin' fast.
752
00:37:47,557 --> 00:37:51,027
I don't want to work at
my uncle's eel farm.
753
00:37:51,186 --> 00:37:52,403
Mm-mm.
754
00:37:55,231 --> 00:37:57,609
I don't know
how to do anything else.
755
00:38:00,987 --> 00:38:03,035
(SIGHS)
756
00:38:03,198 --> 00:38:06,122
Ah, you know,
it's just a slump, boys.
757
00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:08,707
It shall pass.
758
00:38:10,163 --> 00:38:11,540
Come on, get 'em in ya!
759
00:38:11,706 --> 00:38:13,583
- (GLASSES CLINK)
- Mmm.
760
00:38:15,585 --> 00:38:18,885
All the drinks in this country
taste like piss.
761
00:38:19,047 --> 00:38:21,721
It taste like a Cossack
shit in my mouth.
762
00:38:21,883 --> 00:38:25,137
(SLURPS) Oh, that tastes
like burps.
763
00:38:29,724 --> 00:38:32,853
(CONTEMPLATIVE MUSIC)
764
00:38:40,068 --> 00:38:43,368
- Welcome home, kid.
- Thanks.
765
00:38:43,530 --> 00:38:46,158
Big night, eh?
Everybody watchin'.
766
00:38:48,952 --> 00:38:50,329
Don't worry. You'll be fine.
767
00:38:50,495 --> 00:38:52,589
What poor bastard they got you
matched up with tonight?
768
00:38:52,747 --> 00:38:55,546
Didn't they tell you?
Format's been changed.
769
00:38:55,708 --> 00:38:57,176
Changed to what?
770
00:38:57,335 --> 00:38:59,212
ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen,
771
00:38:59,379 --> 00:39:01,302
the Bruised and Battered
competition
772
00:39:01,464 --> 00:39:03,717
is proud to bring you
tonight's special event -
773
00:39:03,883 --> 00:39:06,306
10 fighters,
one rink, one fight
774
00:39:06,469 --> 00:39:09,143
in our first-ever
battle royale!
775
00:39:09,305 --> 00:39:10,978
- Fuck him up!
- Are you ready?
776
00:39:11,140 --> 00:39:13,234
(SUSPENSEFUL ELECTRONIC
MUSIC)
777
00:39:13,393 --> 00:39:17,239
- Are you ready?
- Really bad idea.
778
00:39:18,898 --> 00:39:20,775
Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit,
shit, shit.
779
00:39:23,236 --> 00:39:26,456
- (EXHALES SHARPLY)
- (YELLS)
780
00:39:26,614 --> 00:39:28,537
- (YELLS)
- (BLOWS WHISTLE)
781
00:39:28,700 --> 00:39:31,328
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
782
00:39:32,495 --> 00:39:34,873
Oh, jeez. Oh, jeez! Oh, jeez!
783
00:39:38,126 --> 00:39:41,096
- Aarrgh!
- Jesus Christ on a bike.
784
00:39:41,254 --> 00:39:43,302
- (BOTH GRUNT)
- Fuck you, Glatt.
785
00:39:52,307 --> 00:39:54,435
(BLOWS SQUELCH)
786
00:39:57,979 --> 00:39:59,572
- What are we doing here?
- I don't know.
787
00:39:59,731 --> 00:40:02,029
- I went to fuckin' Princeton.
- (BLOWS THUD)
788
00:40:12,368 --> 00:40:14,041
You look like Super Mario.
789
00:40:14,203 --> 00:40:16,422
Hey, Andrew. (GRUNTS)
790
00:40:20,043 --> 00:40:22,171
My fuck, can he still bang.
791
00:40:22,337 --> 00:40:24,180
(GRUNTS)
792
00:40:29,886 --> 00:40:31,263
Come on, big guy.
793
00:40:31,429 --> 00:40:33,181
What are you,
like, fuckin' 15 years old?
794
00:40:33,348 --> 00:40:35,567
(GRUNTS)
795
00:40:35,725 --> 00:40:37,352
(YELLS)
796
00:40:37,518 --> 00:40:39,111
(GRUNTS)
797
00:40:39,270 --> 00:40:40,647
(SPECTATORS CHANT)
Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross!
798
00:40:40,813 --> 00:40:43,737
Let him go. Let me go.
Let me go. I'm the ref.
799
00:40:43,900 --> 00:40:45,652
Let me go!
800
00:40:47,403 --> 00:40:48,780
Fuck it.
801
00:40:48,947 --> 00:40:50,494
- (BLOW SQUELCHES)
- (GRUNTS)
802
00:40:50,657 --> 00:40:55,163
- (PANTS)
- (HIGH-PITCHED WHINE ECHOES)
803
00:40:55,328 --> 00:40:57,126
(SPITS)
804
00:40:57,288 --> 00:40:59,916
MAN: You're one tough
motherfucker, Dougie!
805
00:41:00,083 --> 00:41:03,212
(SPECTATORS CHEER, APPLAUD)
806
00:41:14,931 --> 00:41:18,652
- Hey, kid.
- Hi, sir.
807
00:41:18,810 --> 00:41:22,155
- You alright?
- (LAUGHS)
808
00:41:23,189 --> 00:41:27,069
Yeah. I've been better.
809
00:41:27,235 --> 00:41:28,737
(SPECTATORS CHANT)
Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
810
00:41:28,903 --> 00:41:30,280
ROSS: Ah, fuck.
811
00:41:30,446 --> 00:41:32,699
(SPECTATORS CHANT) Fight! Fight!
Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
812
00:41:32,865 --> 00:41:35,118
Let's not reinvent
the wheel here, eh?
813
00:41:35,284 --> 00:41:38,413
(SPECTATORS CHANT) Doug! Doug!
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
814
00:41:38,579 --> 00:41:40,081
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
815
00:41:40,248 --> 00:41:43,843
Hey, wait. I got you, buddy.
816
00:41:44,002 --> 00:41:46,846
- (GRUNTS)
- Maybe we should leave.
817
00:41:47,005 --> 00:41:49,679
- (SPECTATORS BOO AND JEER)
- I got you.
818
00:41:49,841 --> 00:41:53,061
(SPECTATORS BOO AND JEER)
819
00:41:53,219 --> 00:41:56,348
(SOLEMN MUSIC)
820
00:42:02,895 --> 00:42:06,741
Well, that was
a fuckin' shitshow, eh?
821
00:42:08,735 --> 00:42:10,863
Not exactly playing hockey,
is it?
822
00:42:14,282 --> 00:42:18,037
Thanks, kid.
You had my back out there.
823
00:42:18,202 --> 00:42:20,296
I owe you.
824
00:42:20,455 --> 00:42:22,878
(COUGHS, SPITS)
825
00:42:25,126 --> 00:42:27,470
Maybe I should take you
to the doctor.
826
00:42:27,628 --> 00:42:29,050
What for?
827
00:42:29,213 --> 00:42:32,217
So he can tell me I got
post-concussion syndrome?
828
00:42:32,383 --> 00:42:35,603
One more bad hit
and you're done?
829
00:42:35,762 --> 00:42:37,309
It's not fuckin' soccer, Dougie.
830
00:42:37,472 --> 00:42:39,850
I've been hearing that shit
for a decade now.
831
00:42:42,268 --> 00:42:44,362
That doesn't sound very good.
832
00:42:47,065 --> 00:42:49,284
You looked mean out there,
kiddo.
833
00:42:49,442 --> 00:42:52,036
Young Anders
better watch his ass.
834
00:42:56,699 --> 00:42:59,043
(CHUCKLES)
835
00:42:59,202 --> 00:43:01,375
Lead these guys!
Lead these guys!
836
00:43:01,537 --> 00:43:03,710
What would a leader do?
What would a fuckin' leader do?
837
00:43:03,873 --> 00:43:07,047
Alright! Alright! Listen up!
838
00:43:07,210 --> 00:43:09,383
Captain speaking! Captain time!
839
00:43:09,545 --> 00:43:11,172
Off your fuckin' phone,
LaFlamme.
840
00:43:11,339 --> 00:43:12,886
- Get off!
- (WHISPERS) Turn it off.
841
00:43:13,049 --> 00:43:15,427
You turn the puck over in
the neutral zone one more time
842
00:43:15,593 --> 00:43:17,687
and I'll teach you a fucking lesson
you'll never forget.
843
00:43:17,845 --> 00:43:19,643
- Got it?
- What the fuck you just say?
844
00:43:19,806 --> 00:43:21,683
And you KHL garbage bullshit,
845
00:43:21,849 --> 00:43:25,274
Ukrainian fuck Hockey League
Chernobyl disaster fucks!
846
00:43:25,436 --> 00:43:27,859
You turn that fuckin' puck over
one more time
847
00:43:28,022 --> 00:43:29,444
and I'll fuckin' kill
both of you!
848
00:43:29,607 --> 00:43:30,984
- And you!
- Yeah?
849
00:43:31,150 --> 00:43:34,495
Fuck, I don't even know.
Fuck you! Fuck you!
850
00:43:34,654 --> 00:43:36,122
Hey!
851
00:43:36,280 --> 00:43:37,907
Be nice.
852
00:43:39,617 --> 00:43:41,164
What?
853
00:43:42,578 --> 00:43:46,299
Be nice.
854
00:43:48,167 --> 00:43:52,263
- (GRUNTS)
- (WHIMPERS)
855
00:43:52,421 --> 00:43:56,267
Whoo! Whoo! Fuck, yeah!
856
00:43:56,425 --> 00:43:58,553
That's what I'm talking about!
Sports!
857
00:43:58,719 --> 00:44:00,096
You miss fucking Doug Glatt?
858
00:44:00,263 --> 00:44:03,938
You think he gives two fuckin' shits
about you guys?
859
00:44:04,100 --> 00:44:07,855
I care! I fucking care!
We're gonna do this together!
860
00:44:08,020 --> 00:44:11,650
Highlanders on three!
One, two, three! Highlanders!
861
00:44:11,816 --> 00:44:13,614
- My line starts!
- (LAUGHS)
862
00:44:13,776 --> 00:44:16,325
See? He gets it!
He fuckin' gets it!
863
00:44:16,487 --> 00:44:18,410
He smiles, he fuckin' gets it.
864
00:44:18,573 --> 00:44:22,373
Fuck! No!
No more fucking candy!
865
00:44:22,535 --> 00:44:24,458
- (KISSES)
- What the fuck?!
866
00:44:24,620 --> 00:44:29,342
- Holy shit!
- (LAUGHS)
867
00:44:29,500 --> 00:44:31,173
(ENERGETIC DANCE MUSIC)
868
00:44:31,335 --> 00:44:32,928
- RED: Highlanders lead Newark...
- Come on!
869
00:44:33,087 --> 00:44:35,465
...1-0, thanks to a goal
by Anders Cain.
870
00:44:35,631 --> 00:44:39,010
Anders Cain wants it badly.
Shoves his own teammate aside.
871
00:44:39,177 --> 00:44:40,599
Now the captain awaits.
872
00:44:40,761 --> 00:44:42,729
Cain takes a good look
up the ice.
873
00:44:42,889 --> 00:44:44,391
- Down the other end...
- Oh, no, he's not...
874
00:44:44,557 --> 00:44:46,059
...is LaFlamme hovering
in the neutral zone.
875
00:44:46,225 --> 00:44:48,023
Cain now works it up.
LaFlamme well ahead.
876
00:44:48,186 --> 00:44:49,563
- BOTH: No!
- (GRUNTS)
877
00:44:49,729 --> 00:44:51,948
A suicide pass!
LaFlamme is decked by Balacco.
878
00:44:52,106 --> 00:44:53,733
- Fuck!
- Fuckin' cunt.
879
00:44:53,900 --> 00:44:56,494
Down on the ice is LaFlamme.
He's spitting blood.
880
00:44:56,652 --> 00:44:59,701
Here's Cain and Stevenson
going at the goal.
881
00:44:59,864 --> 00:45:01,457
- (PLAYERS GRUNT)
- Anders Cain...
882
00:45:01,616 --> 00:45:03,163
What are you doing?!
883
00:45:03,326 --> 00:45:05,203
...levels both the Newark goalie
and Stevenson.
884
00:45:05,369 --> 00:45:06,791
- Fuck me.
- (GRUNTS)
885
00:45:06,954 --> 00:45:08,547
Now Cain draws a crowd.
886
00:45:08,706 --> 00:45:11,710
Cain decks one, decks two,
887
00:45:11,876 --> 00:45:14,720
and Cain stood up to the world.
888
00:45:14,879 --> 00:45:17,598
Your kid finally got suspended,
OK?
889
00:45:17,757 --> 00:45:19,805
- He's destroying this team.
- What's that?
890
00:45:19,967 --> 00:45:22,720
- You heard me, you little shit.
- Tread lightly, Ron.
891
00:45:22,887 --> 00:45:24,810
Hyrum, did you not see
the same fuckin' hockey game
892
00:45:24,972 --> 00:45:26,349
that I saw last night?
893
00:45:26,515 --> 00:45:28,938
- Did you see that game?
- Yeah. I did. I saw compete.
894
00:45:29,101 --> 00:45:30,819
It was misdirected,
but I saw compete.
895
00:45:30,978 --> 00:45:32,355
The dressing room's
in the shitter.
896
00:45:32,521 --> 00:45:34,865
It's tighter than a nun's cunt in there.
There's no chatter.
897
00:45:35,024 --> 00:45:36,776
The boys feel like they're on
the chopping block.
898
00:45:36,943 --> 00:45:38,786
They need someone
to pull them together,
899
00:45:38,945 --> 00:45:40,822
and time after time after time,
900
00:45:40,988 --> 00:45:42,365
he's proven he's not
the fuckin' guy.
901
00:45:42,531 --> 00:45:44,784
Oh, what, so it's my fault
the fucking amateur hour...
902
00:45:44,951 --> 00:45:46,498
Anders.
903
00:45:50,831 --> 00:45:52,378
What about Doug?
904
00:45:52,541 --> 00:45:56,466
- Doug. Doug?
- Maybe I was wrong about him.
905
00:45:56,629 --> 00:45:59,098
I saw him at the shitshow
the other night.
906
00:45:59,257 --> 00:46:01,806
- He looked mean.
- What, really?
907
00:46:01,968 --> 00:46:03,345
- Yeah.
- We thought he was done.
908
00:46:03,511 --> 00:46:05,229
Yeah, 'cause I fuckin'
made him done.
909
00:46:05,388 --> 00:46:06,856
Alright, alright,
910
00:46:07,014 --> 00:46:10,063
well, then maybe we bring him
back to practice, eh?
911
00:46:10,226 --> 00:46:13,230
- GORD: Give him a shot.
- See if he's got what it takes.
912
00:46:13,396 --> 00:46:14,898
But we saw what he did to him,
913
00:46:15,064 --> 00:46:16,566
so what's that dressing room
gonna look like
914
00:46:16,732 --> 00:46:18,109
with him and Glatt in it?
915
00:46:18,276 --> 00:46:21,155
- I think we should find out.
- Fuck me!
916
00:46:21,320 --> 00:46:24,540
Fuck you then,
'cause we're doing it.
917
00:46:24,699 --> 00:46:27,452
('MINSTREL GYPSY' BY KIM BERLY)
918
00:46:36,294 --> 00:46:42,017
♪ Baby, it's nice
to have you here right now
919
00:46:42,174 --> 00:46:44,927
♪ Baby, it's nice
to feel you near... ♪
920
00:46:45,094 --> 00:46:47,722
Oh, my lordy! It's Doug!
921
00:46:49,432 --> 00:46:51,355
Jesus, Stevie,
you fell in the garbage!
922
00:46:51,517 --> 00:46:53,690
- I'm OK. (CHUCKLES)
- Welcome back, Dougie!
923
00:46:53,853 --> 00:46:56,231
- Welcome home, Dougie!
- Welcome home, Doug.
924
00:46:56,397 --> 00:46:58,149
Thanks, bud.
925
00:46:59,900 --> 00:47:02,198
- MAN: Now we're talking!
- MAN 2: Fuckin' right.
926
00:47:02,361 --> 00:47:04,455
OK, boys...
927
00:47:06,574 --> 00:47:08,121
...this is a big day.
928
00:47:08,284 --> 00:47:09,831
First off, we're gonna
welcome back Dougie.
929
00:47:09,994 --> 00:47:12,167
We're gonna see if he's
fit enough to play, alright?
930
00:47:12,330 --> 00:47:14,253
(PLAYERS CHEER)
931
00:47:14,415 --> 00:47:16,213
Thank you, guys.
932
00:47:16,375 --> 00:47:19,219
I'm so happy to be back here
and have a chance to...
933
00:47:20,254 --> 00:47:21,756
...be back here?
934
00:47:21,922 --> 00:47:23,299
That's good.
935
00:47:23,466 --> 00:47:26,891
OK, I'm so fuckin' excited
to tell you this.
936
00:47:27,053 --> 00:47:28,771
Favourite part of
the practice for me.
937
00:47:28,929 --> 00:47:32,274
- Puke time. Suicides.
- Let's give her!
938
00:47:32,433 --> 00:47:35,312
- Lace 'em up! Lace 'em up!
- Man of iron.
939
00:47:35,478 --> 00:47:40,575
- Jew of iron.
- Sorry I smell like garbage.
940
00:47:40,733 --> 00:47:43,407
- See you out there.
- So glad to see you, man.
941
00:47:43,569 --> 00:47:46,072
I totally thought
you were transitioning.
942
00:47:50,576 --> 00:47:52,123
You're not home.
943
00:47:54,288 --> 00:47:57,007
Your fuckin' jersey, you idiot.
You're not home.
944
00:48:06,967 --> 00:48:09,265
You shouldn't have come back,
Doug.
945
00:48:11,180 --> 00:48:12,898
You shouldn't have come back.
946
00:48:18,020 --> 00:48:19,897
They gave you my C.
947
00:48:20,064 --> 00:48:24,194
I think you gave me your C, bud.
948
00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:28,410
Captain doesn't cheap shot,
doesn't try to end careers.
949
00:48:29,448 --> 00:48:30,825
You think
you're a hockey player.
950
00:48:30,991 --> 00:48:34,086
That's fuckin' funny. (CHUCKLES)
951
00:48:34,245 --> 00:48:36,543
(MENACING MUSIC)
952
00:48:39,333 --> 00:48:44,635
See, Doug, I just do whatever
my team needs me to do.
953
00:48:50,928 --> 00:48:52,680
- See you out there, bud.
- (GRUNTS SOFTLY)
954
00:48:52,847 --> 00:48:55,475
You look good.
Your face looks better.
955
00:48:57,184 --> 00:49:01,439
OK, lads, some of youse
have a little rust.
956
00:49:01,605 --> 00:49:04,700
We're gonna work some of that
rust off right fuckin' now, OK?
957
00:49:04,859 --> 00:49:06,236
We're gonna play
some shutdown hockey.
958
00:49:06,402 --> 00:49:07,779
Let's keep it clean, fellas.
959
00:49:07,945 --> 00:49:09,288
You're all on
the same team here.
960
00:49:09,447 --> 00:49:11,199
- OK?
- (DOOR OPENS)
961
00:49:11,365 --> 00:49:12,912
(ENERGETIC ROCK MUSIC)
962
00:49:13,075 --> 00:49:15,703
- Jesus fuckin' Christ.
- Don't mind me.
963
00:49:15,870 --> 00:49:19,920
- We won't. Let's go!
- (PLAYERS SPEAK INDISTINCTLY)
964
00:49:25,337 --> 00:49:26,509
(GRUNTS)
965
00:49:28,340 --> 00:49:30,388
Move your feet, boy!
Move your feet!
966
00:49:31,927 --> 00:49:35,181
- (RONNIE SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY)
- Move it!
967
00:49:35,347 --> 00:49:37,349
Keep your head up!
Keep your head up!
968
00:49:38,434 --> 00:49:41,028
- Oh!
- Goddamn it! Fucking shit...
969
00:49:41,187 --> 00:49:44,862
- Come on!
- Eh?
970
00:49:48,194 --> 00:49:50,117
(GRUNTS)
- Nice, Dougie.
971
00:49:50,279 --> 00:49:51,906
- Good job!
- Come on! Help me out!
972
00:49:52,948 --> 00:49:54,575
- Yeah!
- (PLAYERS CHEER)
973
00:49:54,742 --> 00:49:56,790
- Yeah!
- The old boys are lookin' good.
974
00:49:56,952 --> 00:49:58,078
Fuck!
975
00:50:00,873 --> 00:50:02,090
- Nice, Dougie!
- Whoo!
976
00:50:02,249 --> 00:50:04,877
- Fuck!
- Next goal wins.
977
00:50:05,044 --> 00:50:08,218
Fuck 'next goal wins'.
What is this, street hockey?
978
00:50:08,380 --> 00:50:10,678
- Car!
- Let's get 'em, Anders! Hustle!
979
00:50:10,841 --> 00:50:12,969
Let's go! Let's go!
980
00:50:13,135 --> 00:50:14,512
- (GRUNTS)
- Anders, work!
981
00:50:14,678 --> 00:50:16,646
- They're making you look bad!
- Game on!
982
00:50:16,805 --> 00:50:18,773
Mum's got hot chocolate
at our place after.
983
00:50:18,933 --> 00:50:21,402
Loser brings an orange ball
from Canadian Tire!
984
00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:22,937
'Next goal wins' is a thing.
985
00:50:23,103 --> 00:50:24,605
That's... that's not just
road hockey.
986
00:50:24,772 --> 00:50:26,319
That's... that's...
That is a thing.
987
00:50:27,733 --> 00:50:28,985
Whoo!
988
00:50:29,151 --> 00:50:30,528
Hey, hey, hey! Hey!
989
00:50:30,694 --> 00:50:32,617
Come on.
You gonna fucking turtle on me?
990
00:50:32,780 --> 00:50:34,407
- Hey!
- Come on, Dougie. Round two.
991
00:50:34,573 --> 00:50:36,246
Puck's at your feet!
Play to the whistle!
992
00:50:36,408 --> 00:50:38,376
- Come on, Dougie. Come on.
- Dougie, here!
993
00:50:38,536 --> 00:50:40,755
- Move the puck!
- What the fuck?
994
00:50:41,789 --> 00:50:44,008
- Yes!
- (PLAYERS CHEER)
995
00:50:44,166 --> 00:50:46,760
There you go!
Next goal wins it, right?
996
00:50:50,130 --> 00:50:52,224
- Fuck!
- Jesus Christ, man.
997
00:50:54,093 --> 00:50:56,846
Hey, Hyrum, what kind of
marshmallows do you like?
998
00:50:57,012 --> 00:50:59,515
- Go fuck yourself.
- Boys, bring it in.
999
00:50:59,682 --> 00:51:03,277
Better. Good hustle, eh?
1000
00:51:03,435 --> 00:51:07,485
Good hustle. Heart.
That's what it takes to win.
1001
00:51:07,648 --> 00:51:09,150
You guys are getting
first shift tonight.
1002
00:51:09,316 --> 00:51:11,660
Belchy, you nut, don't wander.
1003
00:51:11,819 --> 00:51:13,662
- You're startin'.
- Fuckin' right, coach.
1004
00:51:13,821 --> 00:51:16,620
- It's Canadian fuckin' hockey.
- OK.
1005
00:51:16,782 --> 00:51:19,001
Dougie, welcome back, son.
1006
00:51:19,159 --> 00:51:20,536
- (HOCKEY STICKS CLACK)
- Welcome back.
1007
00:51:20,703 --> 00:51:22,797
- Come on.
- Good stuff, boys!
1008
00:51:23,914 --> 00:51:27,214
(WOMAN SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY
OVER P.A.)
1009
00:51:28,586 --> 00:51:30,133
Doug, where were you?
1010
00:51:30,296 --> 00:51:32,469
- They called our names to go in.
- I'm sorry, Eva.
1011
00:51:32,631 --> 00:51:35,259
I'll explain
when I'm less sweaty.
1012
00:51:35,426 --> 00:51:38,930
Hey, Triceratops!
That's my favourite dinosaur.
1013
00:51:40,097 --> 00:51:42,350
Remember how I keep saying
that work is fun
1014
00:51:42,516 --> 00:51:44,143
and there's all these documents?
1015
00:51:44,310 --> 00:51:45,687
Well, that's, like,
only half true,
1016
00:51:45,853 --> 00:51:48,697
because it's not fun at all.
1017
00:51:48,856 --> 00:51:50,529
I just don't think
that the insurance bug
1018
00:51:50,691 --> 00:51:53,069
has truly laid its eggs
inside of me.
1019
00:51:54,778 --> 00:51:56,155
OK.
1020
00:51:56,322 --> 00:52:02,250
So, I mean, who said
you had to sell insurance?
1021
00:52:02,411 --> 00:52:03,958
I never told you that.
1022
00:52:05,372 --> 00:52:08,216
And I only got you
those bloody business cards
1023
00:52:08,375 --> 00:52:10,298
because I was trying to be cute
or some shit.
1024
00:52:10,461 --> 00:52:12,964
The Highlanders still need me.
1025
00:52:16,133 --> 00:52:20,513
But we're supposed to be
doing this together, like a team.
1026
00:52:20,679 --> 00:52:25,310
Neither of us are just making
decisions for ourselves anymore.
1027
00:52:25,476 --> 00:52:26,978
A lot of shit
affects both of us.
1028
00:52:27,144 --> 00:52:28,566
(OBSTETRICIAN CLEARS THROAT)
1029
00:52:28,729 --> 00:52:31,858
(FOETAL HEARTBEAT GURGLES)
1030
00:52:35,653 --> 00:52:39,032
Look at her.
Look at what we did.
1031
00:52:39,198 --> 00:52:40,165
Yeah.
1032
00:52:40,324 --> 00:52:43,954
She looks like a beautiful
tiny mushroom person.
1033
00:52:44,119 --> 00:52:46,042
She's so cool.
1034
00:52:46,205 --> 00:52:48,378
(GENTLE MUSIC)
1035
00:52:50,584 --> 00:52:51,961
Just...
1036
00:52:52,127 --> 00:52:55,552
It was different watching you
beat the piss out of guys
1037
00:52:55,714 --> 00:52:57,091
before I actually knew you.
1038
00:52:57,257 --> 00:52:59,976
I mean,
I fuckin' loved it, obviously.
1039
00:53:00,135 --> 00:53:03,014
Part of what made me dig you
in the first place.
1040
00:53:03,180 --> 00:53:07,060
But the fucking very moment
I fell in love with you,
1041
00:53:07,226 --> 00:53:09,354
it got scary.
1042
00:53:09,520 --> 00:53:14,401
Now you're my husband
and we've got...
1043
00:53:17,569 --> 00:53:21,790
- This is big shit, Doug.
- I know it is.
1044
00:53:21,949 --> 00:53:26,750
I love you,
and if you want to do something,
1045
00:53:26,912 --> 00:53:30,007
then I'm with you...
1046
00:53:31,458 --> 00:53:35,463
...but I can't be scared shitless
every time you go out there.
1047
00:53:35,629 --> 00:53:37,427
So, what I mean is,
1048
00:53:37,589 --> 00:53:39,637
if you want to be
a Highlander again,
1049
00:53:39,800 --> 00:53:42,599
then go and be
a Highlander again.
1050
00:53:42,761 --> 00:53:44,263
I'll support you,
1051
00:53:44,430 --> 00:53:47,730
but you have to do
one thing for me.
1052
00:53:47,891 --> 00:53:50,565
I would do anything for you,
Eva.
1053
00:53:51,812 --> 00:53:53,860
Don't fight.
1054
00:53:55,691 --> 00:53:57,113
What?
1055
00:53:57,276 --> 00:54:01,156
I've seen you make hits
and kill penalties
1056
00:54:01,321 --> 00:54:03,995
and block shots with your face.
1057
00:54:05,909 --> 00:54:08,708
I'm trying, but you gotta
meet me halfway and...
1058
00:54:09,955 --> 00:54:11,548
...and not fight.
1059
00:54:15,252 --> 00:54:17,380
You're more than that.
1060
00:54:19,131 --> 00:54:23,011
- OK.
- Thank you, Doug.
1061
00:54:24,428 --> 00:54:25,975
Thank you, Eva.
1062
00:54:29,892 --> 00:54:33,192
(SIGHS) Come on,
you can't quit on me now.
1063
00:54:33,353 --> 00:54:34,730
What about all our adventures?
1064
00:54:34,897 --> 00:54:37,366
Remember that one time
I thought you had a watch?
1065
00:54:39,318 --> 00:54:41,161
God, you're just gonna
throw that away?
1066
00:54:41,320 --> 00:54:43,038
I'm sorry, Bob Forbes.
1067
00:54:43,197 --> 00:54:45,620
I don't know anything
about documents.
1068
00:54:45,783 --> 00:54:47,160
What, do you think I do?
1069
00:54:47,326 --> 00:54:48,703
God, somebody gives me
a document
1070
00:54:48,869 --> 00:54:50,792
and I go, "Mmm, err,"
give it to another guy.
1071
00:54:50,954 --> 00:54:52,581
That's how insurance works!
1072
00:54:52,748 --> 00:54:54,750
Goddamn it!
1073
00:54:54,917 --> 00:54:56,760
(SIGHS)
1074
00:54:56,919 --> 00:54:59,638
Well, can't say
I'm not sad to see you go,
1075
00:54:59,797 --> 00:55:02,641
but if you change your mind,
just know you always got a spot
1076
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:05,474
here in the storage shed,
Dennis.
1077
00:55:06,512 --> 00:55:08,480
He's... he's staying?
No, he's going. Shit.
1078
00:55:08,639 --> 00:55:10,266
Argh!
1079
00:55:11,517 --> 00:55:14,737
Always driving away
the ones you love.
1080
00:55:16,146 --> 00:55:17,693
Yeah, that ought to hold.
1081
00:55:17,856 --> 00:55:19,654
Jesus Christ.
1082
00:55:19,817 --> 00:55:22,195
(GRUNTS)
1083
00:55:22,361 --> 00:55:25,331
('HEY HEY GUY' BY KEN LASZLO)
1084
00:55:25,489 --> 00:55:27,036
(MESSAGE ALERT CHIMES)
1085
00:55:34,957 --> 00:55:38,177
- Hey. How's your arm?
- Good, thank you.
1086
00:55:38,335 --> 00:55:39,882
How's your arm?
1087
00:55:41,463 --> 00:55:44,216
Listen, um, everybody's rusty
their first game.
1088
00:55:44,383 --> 00:55:45,930
It's OK, OK?
1089
00:55:46,093 --> 00:55:47,390
(CLICKS TONGUE)
1090
00:55:51,056 --> 00:55:54,606
What the fuck? Belchy.
1091
00:55:54,768 --> 00:55:56,236
Belchy!
1092
00:55:56,395 --> 00:55:59,615
We are very much happy
you are playing again.
1093
00:55:59,773 --> 00:56:01,650
This is our gift to you.
1094
00:56:01,817 --> 00:56:03,194
Sandwich.
1095
00:56:03,360 --> 00:56:06,079
This is you upon receipt
of sandwich.
1096
00:56:06,238 --> 00:56:07,865
- Smiley?
- Mm-hmm.
1097
00:56:08,031 --> 00:56:11,160
Happy cartoon, huh?
1098
00:56:12,369 --> 00:56:14,747
Fuckin' A, man.
That feels fuckin' right.
1099
00:56:14,913 --> 00:56:16,290
We needed this, man.
1100
00:56:16,456 --> 00:56:17,833
You two fuckin' buffoons
1101
00:56:18,000 --> 00:56:19,547
are standing there
with your giant dicks.
1102
00:56:19,710 --> 00:56:21,633
I mean,
that's a fuckin' sturgeon, man.
1103
00:56:21,795 --> 00:56:23,263
- Jesus Christ!
- (GASPS)
1104
00:56:23,422 --> 00:56:25,595
I always think you're gonna
fuckin' prank me or whatever,
1105
00:56:25,757 --> 00:56:28,806
or you're gonna say your shit
about my fuckin' mom, which...
1106
00:56:28,969 --> 00:56:32,269
No, no, no, no, no.
We respect your mother now.
1107
00:56:32,431 --> 00:56:35,935
She's becoming
very open-minded.
1108
00:56:36,101 --> 00:56:38,399
Yeah, man. Alright.
She's been working on that.
1109
00:56:38,562 --> 00:56:42,408
Big cream pie,
pearl fucking necklace...
1110
00:56:42,566 --> 00:56:46,742
Golden showers,
double penetration.
1111
00:56:46,904 --> 00:56:48,872
- Uh-huh!
- Double penetration.
1112
00:56:49,031 --> 00:56:51,033
No butt, just vagina.
1113
00:56:51,199 --> 00:56:54,123
- Two penis, one hole.
- Yes.
1114
00:56:54,286 --> 00:56:59,338
Warm, worm kisses
deep inside your mother.
1115
00:56:59,499 --> 00:57:02,093
- Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi!
- (BOTH GRUNT)
1116
00:57:02,252 --> 00:57:05,552
The fuck is that?
Warm worm? Fuck you two, man!
1117
00:57:05,714 --> 00:57:08,183
You understand,
we are brothers.
1118
00:57:08,342 --> 00:57:10,640
We power-fuck your mother.
1119
00:57:10,802 --> 00:57:12,770
You know, I'm an idiot
for fucking even trusting you
1120
00:57:12,930 --> 00:57:15,558
for a second,
you Ruskie fuckin' pricks!
1121
00:57:15,724 --> 00:57:17,522
The best revenge is living well.
1122
00:57:17,684 --> 00:57:19,732
I'm not stooping to
your fuckin' level.
1123
00:57:20,854 --> 00:57:23,323
- The mayonnaise is semen.
- (SPITS) What?
1124
00:57:23,482 --> 00:57:27,612
- Semen.
- You know, ejaculate.
1125
00:57:28,904 --> 00:57:30,952
JAMES: Doug Glatt
is a Highlander once more.
1126
00:57:31,114 --> 00:57:32,787
With just a quarter
of the season left,
1127
00:57:32,950 --> 00:57:35,874
Hyrum Cain seems to be trying
a hail Mary move
1128
00:57:36,036 --> 00:57:38,004
by bringing back a man
known for his fists
1129
00:57:38,163 --> 00:57:39,836
and, frankly, not much else.
1130
00:57:39,998 --> 00:57:40,874
No.
1131
00:57:41,041 --> 00:57:43,715
Considering this will be
Glatt's first hockey game
1132
00:57:43,877 --> 00:57:45,720
since being knocked out
by his now teammate,
1133
00:57:45,879 --> 00:57:47,347
the currently suspended
Anders Cain,
1134
00:57:47,506 --> 00:57:49,884
this should make for
an interesting locker room dynamic
1135
00:57:50,050 --> 00:57:53,054
and even more awkward
Cain family Boxing Day.
1136
00:57:53,220 --> 00:57:56,895
I mean, that household
is a fucking disaster.
1137
00:57:57,057 --> 00:57:59,651
- Just read the prompter, man.
- No.
1138
00:57:59,810 --> 00:58:02,689
I say what I want, James,
because I got a pair of balls,
1139
00:58:02,854 --> 00:58:04,231
not two pieces of pussy.
1140
00:58:04,398 --> 00:58:05,900
How long is this
gonna happen for?
1141
00:58:06,066 --> 00:58:07,443
For as long as it takes.
1142
00:58:07,609 --> 00:58:10,237
Sports Desk -
we'll take as long as it takes.
1143
00:58:10,404 --> 00:58:12,372
(MICROPHONE FEEDBACK
SQUEALS)
1144
00:58:12,531 --> 00:58:15,410
Sports Desk - fuck, yeah.
1145
00:58:16,910 --> 00:58:18,332
- Alright. OK.
- Ha!
1146
00:58:18,495 --> 00:58:21,544
- Fuck it.
- Off the belly. In the ear!
1147
00:58:21,707 --> 00:58:23,334
- EVA: Alright, no.
- RED: Doug 'The Thug' Glatt.
1148
00:58:23,500 --> 00:58:25,673
Doug with that big dick.
1149
00:58:26,962 --> 00:58:29,056
- Too much?
- It's not...
1150
00:58:29,214 --> 00:58:32,889
...the Halifax faithful hoping
'The Thug' can do his part
1151
00:58:33,051 --> 00:58:35,145
to get them back to
the play-offs.
1152
00:58:35,303 --> 00:58:37,681
So, the St John's Shamrocks.
1153
00:58:37,848 --> 00:58:39,691
The Shamrocks breaking out of
their own zone.
1154
00:58:39,850 --> 00:58:41,523
- Here's the pass up the wing.
- (IMPACT THUDS)
1155
00:58:41,685 --> 00:58:42,607
Oh, baby!
1156
00:58:42,769 --> 00:58:44,442
Doug Glatt's return
1157
00:58:44,604 --> 00:58:48,859
continues to electrify
his crowd and his team.
1158
00:58:49,026 --> 00:58:50,994
St John's still with
a man advantage.
1159
00:58:51,153 --> 00:58:52,655
LaFlamme getting up,
getting ready to go,
1160
00:58:52,821 --> 00:58:55,700
Anders Cain, no help tonight
as he has been suspended.
1161
00:58:57,200 --> 00:58:59,749
Five seconds to go on
the St John's powerplay,
1162
00:58:59,911 --> 00:59:01,538
and somehow Halifax
has been able
1163
00:59:01,705 --> 00:59:03,503
to keep this game
tied at zero.
1164
00:59:03,665 --> 00:59:05,212
Now LaFlamme
steps out on the ice.
1165
00:59:05,375 --> 00:59:06,592
Halifax with the heat on.
1166
00:59:06,752 --> 00:59:08,174
Carlson looking back,
1167
00:59:08,336 --> 00:59:10,054
takes the puck at
the blue line.
1168
00:59:10,213 --> 00:59:14,309
Now Carlson, he's got a cannon!
He winds it up.
1169
00:59:14,468 --> 00:59:16,141
(PUCK WHOOSHES)
1170
00:59:16,303 --> 00:59:19,022
Oh, everyone,
check your asses for monkeys.
1171
00:59:19,181 --> 00:59:21,104
Xavier LaFlamme
blocking a shot?
1172
00:59:21,266 --> 00:59:23,234
Now we go to Stevenson.
1173
00:59:23,393 --> 00:59:25,361
Stevenson moves down
deep into the corner.
1174
00:59:26,396 --> 00:59:28,490
Oh, growing out a moustache,
you little bitch, huh? Huh?
1175
00:59:30,525 --> 00:59:33,495
I'm so exhausted! Gatorade!
1176
00:59:33,653 --> 00:59:37,157
And now Glatt decides,
"Well, I'm a little thirsty."
1177
00:59:37,324 --> 00:59:39,122
Sorry. Pardon.
I'm super thirsty.
1178
00:59:39,284 --> 00:59:41,537
Meanwhile, Stevenson
comes out of the corner.
1179
00:59:41,703 --> 00:59:44,502
- He scores!
- (SPECTATORS CHEER)
1180
00:59:45,540 --> 00:59:48,134
- He took my fuckin' bottle...
- Yeah!
1181
00:59:48,293 --> 00:59:49,920
Well, I suppose there's no rule
1182
00:59:50,087 --> 00:59:52,181
about drinking
the opposing team's Gatorade,
1183
00:59:52,339 --> 00:59:55,013
but perhaps after tonight,
there should be.
1184
00:59:55,175 --> 00:59:57,223
(LAUGHS) You stole
his Gatorade, man!
1185
00:59:57,385 --> 00:59:59,387
He's so mad!
1186
00:59:59,554 --> 01:00:02,307
Highlanders win thanks to
the unquenchable thirst
1187
01:00:02,474 --> 01:00:04,852
of a man they call 'The Thug'.
1188
01:00:10,107 --> 01:00:12,075
Good for you, kid.
1189
01:00:14,820 --> 01:00:16,822
Good for you.
1190
01:00:19,074 --> 01:00:20,747
Boys,
1191
01:00:20,909 --> 01:00:23,162
got a little heat going now,
right?
1192
01:00:23,328 --> 01:00:25,376
So we're all gonna
take that heat into Reading
1193
01:00:25,539 --> 01:00:28,008
and we're gonna burn
their fuckin' flesh off
1194
01:00:28,166 --> 01:00:30,385
like fuckin' flamethrowers!
1195
01:00:30,544 --> 01:00:31,511
- Sir?
- Yes?
1196
01:00:31,670 --> 01:00:33,047
OK, for the last time,
1197
01:00:33,213 --> 01:00:37,059
I'm gonna have to ask you to
lower your voice, OK? Just...
1198
01:00:37,217 --> 01:00:38,844
Sweetie, take that for me,
would you?
1199
01:00:39,010 --> 01:00:41,354
Uh, no, not in first class,
so I don't take your... anything.
1200
01:00:41,513 --> 01:00:43,015
- Alrighty. Sit down?
- Just have a seat there.
1201
01:00:43,181 --> 01:00:44,979
Yes, sir.
That would be wonderful.
1202
01:00:45,142 --> 01:00:48,237
Thank you very much.
And if you could just remain seated.
1203
01:00:48,395 --> 01:00:50,443
- (GROANING)
- Oh for fuck's sake!
1204
01:00:50,605 --> 01:00:53,233
- (LIQUID TRICKLES)
- (GRUNTS) Hey, Belchy!
1205
01:00:53,400 --> 01:00:57,826
Come see! This toilet looks
just like your mother.
1206
01:00:57,988 --> 01:01:01,083
(GRUNTS) Only markedly less
toilet-like.
1207
01:01:01,241 --> 01:01:02,618
(BOTH GROAN)
1208
01:01:02,784 --> 01:01:06,254
Oh, my God, you guys are...
Get the fuck out of here, man.
1209
01:01:06,413 --> 01:01:08,836
- (BOTH LAUGH)
- WOMAN: Disgusting.
1210
01:01:08,999 --> 01:01:11,718
(WHISPERS) Hey. I'm not done.
1211
01:01:11,877 --> 01:01:13,754
- What...
- No.
1212
01:01:14,796 --> 01:01:16,264
(WHISPERS) She said no.
1213
01:01:16,423 --> 01:01:18,266
We're gonna skate in there
1214
01:01:18,425 --> 01:01:22,020
and we're gonna show those
translucent Rust Belt weirdos
1215
01:01:22,179 --> 01:01:23,601
how we play hock...
1216
01:01:23,763 --> 01:01:24,764
I swear.
1217
01:01:24,931 --> 01:01:26,308
(WHISPERS)
...north of the border.
1218
01:01:26,474 --> 01:01:29,227
- (MUTED CHEERS)
- (WHISPERS) Highlanders.
1219
01:01:29,394 --> 01:01:31,362
(SNAPS) Highlanders.
1220
01:01:31,521 --> 01:01:34,741
(ALL WHISPER)
Highlanders. Highlanders.
1221
01:01:34,900 --> 01:01:37,153
OK, but that is still making us
uncomfortable.
1222
01:01:37,319 --> 01:01:41,290
(ALL WHISPER) Highlanders.
Highlanders. Highlanders.
1223
01:01:41,448 --> 01:01:45,703
- Highlanders. Highlanders.
- Wow, it smells like dick.
1224
01:01:45,869 --> 01:01:49,339
(WHISPERS) Highlanders.
Highlanders. Highlanders.
1225
01:01:49,497 --> 01:01:50,874
Stay in school.
1226
01:01:51,041 --> 01:01:52,418
(WHISPERS) Highlanders.
1227
01:01:52,584 --> 01:01:53,961
RED: Three minutes left
in the third
1228
01:01:54,127 --> 01:01:56,926
and the Highlanders' hot streak
is in danger of ending,
1229
01:01:57,088 --> 01:01:59,056
as they trail the Wolfdogs
3 to 2.
1230
01:01:59,216 --> 01:02:00,934
A win tonight would see them
1231
01:02:01,092 --> 01:02:02,844
just one spot outside
play-offs contention.
1232
01:02:03,011 --> 01:02:05,309
All my uncles are dead!
1233
01:02:05,472 --> 01:02:07,065
Anders Cain looks in front,
turns...
1234
01:02:07,224 --> 01:02:09,147
Oh, Waxman's...
(SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
1235
01:02:09,309 --> 01:02:13,359
Cain scores!
And it's tied 3-3.
1236
01:02:13,521 --> 01:02:17,116
Great goal by Anders Cain
to keep the dream alive.
1237
01:02:17,275 --> 01:02:18,777
They're gonna be throwing
everything at us now
1238
01:02:18,944 --> 01:02:20,446
but the kitchen sink.
1239
01:02:20,612 --> 01:02:22,080
LaFlamme, do what you did
last game.
1240
01:02:22,239 --> 01:02:24,583
Stevesy, take his lead.
1241
01:02:24,741 --> 01:02:26,584
Yeah, yeah.
Dougie, listen to me.
1242
01:02:26,743 --> 01:02:28,962
You watch their backs,
keep your head in the fuckin' game.
1243
01:02:29,120 --> 01:02:31,214
Handle big man. You see him?
Send him a message.
1244
01:02:31,373 --> 01:02:33,250
Wake him up, Doug. Go, go, go.
1245
01:02:33,416 --> 01:02:35,669
Don't go starting shit
you can't finish.
1246
01:02:35,835 --> 01:02:38,634
Coach Ronnie Hortense
had a few words for Doug Glatt
1247
01:02:38,797 --> 01:02:41,050
who hasn't fought since
he came back two weeks ago,
1248
01:02:41,216 --> 01:02:44,140
and he goes
straight toward Totan.
1249
01:02:44,302 --> 01:02:46,304
- You are bumping me.
- Mount Totan.
1250
01:02:46,471 --> 01:02:49,190
- You're so enormous.
- (SNARLS)
1251
01:02:49,349 --> 01:02:50,646
Oy vey!
1252
01:02:52,269 --> 01:02:55,113
Off the faceoff, the puck goes
back into the Wolfdog zone.
1253
01:02:55,272 --> 01:02:57,570
Now it's sent off to centre ice,
turned over by LaFlamme.
1254
01:02:57,732 --> 01:02:59,609
LaFlamme looks across,
finds Stevenson.
1255
01:02:59,776 --> 01:03:02,529
Stevenson dumps it deep into
the Wolfdog territory.
1256
01:03:02,696 --> 01:03:04,164
The puck goes around now
to Totan.
1257
01:03:04,322 --> 01:03:06,074
MAN: Here we go!
1258
01:03:06,241 --> 01:03:09,745
Here comes Glatt
right at Totan!
1259
01:03:09,911 --> 01:03:11,913
- (IMPACT SMACKS)
- Oh, and he misses completely!
1260
01:03:12,080 --> 01:03:13,332
Fuck. Shit.
1261
01:03:13,498 --> 01:03:15,967
It looks like he's in pain
on his right side.
1262
01:03:16,126 --> 01:03:17,002
(GRUNTS)
1263
01:03:17,168 --> 01:03:18,886
Starting the other way,
the Reading Wolfdogs
1264
01:03:19,045 --> 01:03:21,423
with an opportunity for
the go-ahead goal.
1265
01:03:21,589 --> 01:03:23,933
The puck is brought in
across the blue line.
1266
01:03:25,093 --> 01:03:27,687
- He scores!
- Fuck!
1267
01:03:27,846 --> 01:03:29,348
- Reading win!
- Fuck!
1268
01:03:29,514 --> 01:03:31,391
And with just 10 games left
in the season,
1269
01:03:31,558 --> 01:03:33,356
the Highlanders
seem to have found a way
1270
01:03:33,518 --> 01:03:36,146
to rescue defeat
from the jaws of victory.
1271
01:03:36,313 --> 01:03:37,690
Way to go, Dougie!
1272
01:03:37,856 --> 01:03:39,733
Come on, Doug.
1273
01:03:40,859 --> 01:03:43,988
BELCHIOR: I don't wanna hear it.
Let's go. Let's fuckin' go.
1274
01:03:44,154 --> 01:03:45,781
Beth! Beth, get in the car.
1275
01:03:45,947 --> 01:03:48,496
You better not have drank milk today,
you fuckin' lactose...
1276
01:03:48,658 --> 01:03:50,205
BELCHIOR: Come on!
1277
01:03:54,205 --> 01:03:57,379
- Did you watch the game?
- Yeah.
1278
01:03:57,542 --> 01:03:59,260
(SIGHS)
1279
01:03:59,419 --> 01:04:01,717
You said it could be scary
watching me out there.
1280
01:04:01,880 --> 01:04:03,553
Was it scary?
1281
01:04:04,841 --> 01:04:07,094
I mean, I don't like
watching you get hurt,
1282
01:04:07,260 --> 01:04:09,354
so, yeah, a little.
1283
01:04:10,597 --> 01:04:11,974
- Ah!
- Oh, God! Jesus!
1284
01:04:12,140 --> 01:04:13,892
- Are you OK?
- Yeah.
1285
01:04:18,938 --> 01:04:21,316
M-Maybe you shouldn't watch
the next one.
1286
01:04:23,526 --> 01:04:26,826
Yeah. Alright.
1287
01:04:26,988 --> 01:04:31,084
MATTHEW GOOD: ♪ Insane I wake up
1288
01:04:31,242 --> 01:04:35,292
♪ The oars I take up... ♪
1289
01:04:35,455 --> 01:04:37,583
(ENGINE STARTS)
1290
01:04:37,749 --> 01:04:39,592
RED: Halfway through the third,
1291
01:04:39,751 --> 01:04:41,594
the Highlanders are fighting
for their post-season lives
1292
01:04:41,753 --> 01:04:43,426
on fan appreciation night.
1293
01:04:43,588 --> 01:04:45,431
- A shot blocked by LaFlamme.
- Attaboy, Flammer!
1294
01:04:45,590 --> 01:04:47,217
What a contribution he's made.
1295
01:04:47,384 --> 01:04:49,432
Now LaFlamme
sees Walters coming.
1296
01:04:49,594 --> 01:04:53,064
And Walters sucker-punched him,
but he gets up.
1297
01:04:53,223 --> 01:04:55,851
- He appears to be alright.
- Lift your fuckin' arm, ref!
1298
01:04:56,017 --> 01:04:58,270
McBain player Walters
is sent to the penalty box.
1299
01:04:59,771 --> 01:05:01,865
And he is none too impressed.
1300
01:05:06,444 --> 01:05:08,446
- Fuck!
- You OK?
1301
01:05:08,613 --> 01:05:10,365
Yeah, I'm alright. Thanks.
1302
01:05:10,532 --> 01:05:12,910
OK, now we're gonna take
this fuckin' power play,
1303
01:05:13,076 --> 01:05:14,919
and we're gonna shove it up
their fuckin' sphincters!
1304
01:05:15,078 --> 01:05:16,295
No K-Y.
1305
01:05:16,454 --> 01:05:17,876
And when we're done with that,
1306
01:05:18,039 --> 01:05:21,043
and that ugly piece of shit
gets out of that fuckin' box,
1307
01:05:21,209 --> 01:05:23,086
we'll give 'em a piece
of our mind, OK?
1308
01:05:23,253 --> 01:05:26,348
I can do that, sir. I can give 'em
a piece of all our minds.
1309
01:05:26,506 --> 01:05:29,726
No, he fuckin' can't.
His arm's all fucked up.
1310
01:05:29,884 --> 01:05:31,636
I'm fine. I can do this.
1311
01:05:31,803 --> 01:05:33,805
You can't fuckin' fight anybody.
1312
01:05:33,972 --> 01:05:36,475
Jesus Christ, boys.
What... what's going on?
1313
01:05:36,641 --> 01:05:40,020
- (GRUNTS)
- Not now, kiddo. Not now.
1314
01:05:42,730 --> 01:05:45,483
Anders Cain
is coming right across...
1315
01:05:45,650 --> 01:05:47,277
- Yeah? You wanna go?
- Yeah, come on.
1316
01:05:47,444 --> 01:05:48,821
Yeah, anytime, tough guy!
1317
01:05:48,987 --> 01:05:50,455
I'll fuckin' go right on
1318
01:05:50,613 --> 01:05:52,115
and knock your fuckin' teeth
down your throat.
1319
01:05:52,282 --> 01:05:53,659
- Come on!
- Yeah, bring it on!
1320
01:05:53,825 --> 01:05:55,998
I'll tear your fuckin' head off
like a cured meat stick!
1321
01:05:56,161 --> 01:05:58,163
- RONNIE: Stevesy, you're up.
- You're a fuckin' meat stick!
1322
01:05:58,329 --> 01:06:00,923
And now there's action
over at the Highlander bench.
1323
01:06:01,082 --> 01:06:02,629
- And here comes Doug Glatt.
- Glatt!
1324
01:06:02,792 --> 01:06:04,169
- Hortense calls him back.
- Glatt!
1325
01:06:04,335 --> 01:06:05,803
- Get back here!
- Uh-oh!
1326
01:06:05,962 --> 01:06:09,387
We may finally see 'The Thug'
drop his gloves after all.
1327
01:06:09,549 --> 01:06:11,301
Anytime. Oh, you too?
1328
01:06:11,468 --> 01:06:12,845
What the fuck
are you doing here?
1329
01:06:13,011 --> 01:06:14,513
- What are you doing here?
- I'm here to...
1330
01:06:14,679 --> 01:06:16,727
And now both Glatt and Cain
push and shove.
1331
01:06:16,890 --> 01:06:18,563
What the fuck do you mean,
you're here?
1332
01:06:18,725 --> 01:06:20,978
- I'll fuck both you guys up!
- It's mine!
1333
01:06:21,144 --> 01:06:22,111
Whoa! Fuck!
1334
01:06:22,270 --> 01:06:24,648
And down goes Cain
with Glatt on top!
1335
01:06:24,814 --> 01:06:26,612
- What am I lookin' at?
- Fuck!
1336
01:06:26,774 --> 01:06:28,993
- What the fuck is this?!
- I don't know. I don't know.
1337
01:06:29,152 --> 01:06:31,746
I don't even wanna fight anymore.
You killed the mood.
1338
01:06:31,905 --> 01:06:33,828
Dougie, why are you
dry-humping Anders?
1339
01:06:33,990 --> 01:06:36,084
- Get off me!
- I'm trying! I don't want this!
1340
01:06:36,242 --> 01:06:38,836
You're on the same
fucking team, man!
1341
01:06:38,995 --> 01:06:41,669
Fuck, this is horrible!
This is fucking horrible!
1342
01:06:41,831 --> 01:06:43,253
- It is!
- Fuck!
1343
01:06:43,416 --> 01:06:44,383
It is.
1344
01:06:44,542 --> 01:06:47,466
I would like to remind fans
that, should they still desire,
1345
01:06:47,629 --> 01:06:49,176
they can meet the Highlanders
in person tonight
1346
01:06:49,339 --> 01:06:51,967
at the Corktown Pub
for fan appreciation night.
1347
01:06:52,133 --> 01:06:56,980
(CROWD CHEERS AND CHANTS)
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
1348
01:06:57,138 --> 01:07:00,733
MAN: Anders, you fuckin' suck!
We fuckin' hate you!
1349
01:07:00,892 --> 01:07:02,940
Anders,
you piece of fuckin' shit!
1350
01:07:03,102 --> 01:07:05,855
(WHISPERS) I know it.
I fucking know it.
1351
01:07:06,022 --> 01:07:07,524
What the fuck is wrong
with you now?
1352
01:07:07,690 --> 01:07:09,112
You know it too.
1353
01:07:09,275 --> 01:07:11,323
- I beat the shit...
- Take it easy.
1354
01:07:11,486 --> 01:07:12,863
- ...out of Doug Glatt.
- Take it easy.
1355
01:07:13,029 --> 01:07:15,498
You fucking take it easy!
I fucking destroyed him!
1356
01:07:15,657 --> 01:07:17,375
- Calm down.
- Get your fucking hands off me!
1357
01:07:17,534 --> 01:07:19,127
- Hey!
- HYRUM: Anders...
1358
01:07:22,163 --> 01:07:23,915
I beat you.
1359
01:07:25,583 --> 01:07:27,176
Don't look at them,
you dumb fuck.
1360
01:07:27,335 --> 01:07:29,212
- Look at me.
- Anders!
1361
01:07:29,379 --> 01:07:33,930
I am here now. Me.
Right fucking in front of you!
1362
01:07:34,092 --> 01:07:36,265
- (GRUNTS)
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
1363
01:07:36,427 --> 01:07:38,225
- Attaboy, Doug.
- Doug...
1364
01:07:38,388 --> 01:07:40,482
- (ALL SHOUT OVER EACH OTHER)
- That's enough!
1365
01:07:40,640 --> 01:07:44,190
- That's it. Come on.
- (PANTS)
1366
01:07:44,352 --> 01:07:47,572
- I'm fine. I'm fucking fine!
- Good. Chill out, man.
1367
01:07:47,730 --> 01:07:49,482
- OK? Just breathe.
- (GLASS SHATTERS)
1368
01:07:49,649 --> 01:07:51,947
(ALL SHOUT OVER EACH OTHER)
1369
01:07:52,110 --> 01:07:54,363
- That's enough!
- Come on, Doug!
1370
01:07:56,072 --> 01:07:58,541
- God!
- Anders, it's over. It's over.
1371
01:07:58,700 --> 01:08:01,670
Get out. Walk him out.
1372
01:08:02,954 --> 01:08:05,753
(SINISTER MUSIC)
1373
01:08:05,915 --> 01:08:08,418
JAMES: Early reports coming in
of a bar brawl tonight
1374
01:08:08,585 --> 01:08:10,758
at a popular
Halifax Highlanders hang-out,
1375
01:08:10,920 --> 01:08:13,594
allegedly involving
the Highlanders themselves
1376
01:08:13,756 --> 01:08:15,884
in what could be
just another example
1377
01:08:16,050 --> 01:08:18,052
of violence dogging the team.
1378
01:08:18,219 --> 01:08:19,596
This coming just weeks after
1379
01:08:19,762 --> 01:08:21,639
controversial
hockey fighting competition
1380
01:08:21,806 --> 01:08:23,900
Bruised and Battered
held its most recent event
1381
01:08:24,058 --> 01:08:27,688
at the Highlanders' home barn,
the Halifax MetroCentre.
1382
01:08:27,854 --> 01:08:30,448
With two must-win games
left to play
1383
01:08:30,607 --> 01:08:32,484
and Cain and Glatt
each serving suspensions,
1384
01:08:32,650 --> 01:08:34,027
one can't help but wonder
1385
01:08:34,193 --> 01:08:38,289
if GM Hyrum Cain has
any more tricks up his sleeve.
1386
01:08:40,825 --> 01:08:42,748
EVA: You broke your promise.
1387
01:08:42,910 --> 01:08:45,038
I'm scared.
1388
01:08:45,204 --> 01:08:47,673
I never felt that before.
1389
01:08:49,250 --> 01:08:50,627
He's wearing my C.
1390
01:08:50,793 --> 01:08:53,967
Are you fucking kidding me?
That's the best you can do?
1391
01:08:54,130 --> 01:08:57,851
I gave up stuff
I like doing too.
1392
01:08:58,009 --> 01:09:00,228
It's different.
You've never had a team.
1393
01:09:02,972 --> 01:09:04,599
Yeah.
1394
01:09:04,766 --> 01:09:07,144
Yeah, maybe you're right.
Maybe... maybe I never did.
1395
01:09:07,310 --> 01:09:09,904
I can still do what I'm supposed
to do. I can still fight.
1396
01:09:10,063 --> 01:09:11,440
EVA: I guess
that's the fucking problem.
1397
01:09:11,606 --> 01:09:12,607
Eva...
1398
01:09:12,774 --> 01:09:14,367
And yet the worst part is
1399
01:09:14,525 --> 01:09:18,280
you're making me into this
fuckin' naggy housewife.
1400
01:09:18,446 --> 01:09:22,826
Do you think I wanna be
fucking worrying about you?
1401
01:09:22,992 --> 01:09:25,745
You think I want to be
giving you shit?
1402
01:09:25,912 --> 01:09:28,006
I don't. This isn't who I am.
1403
01:09:28,164 --> 01:09:30,667
Eva, please.
Where are you going?
1404
01:09:30,833 --> 01:09:33,177
I'm not going anywhere.
1405
01:09:40,760 --> 01:09:42,637
I eat this soup.
1406
01:09:44,097 --> 01:09:46,771
Yes, I know. That's why I...
1407
01:09:46,933 --> 01:09:49,106
(SIGHS)
1408
01:09:51,312 --> 01:09:53,906
I just need some time, Doug.
1409
01:09:56,275 --> 01:09:57,868
(SIGHS)
1410
01:10:04,784 --> 01:10:08,584
ANDERS: Dad,
I'm fuckin' sorry, OK?
1411
01:10:08,746 --> 01:10:11,215
I'm sorry.
I fuck... I-I fucked up.
1412
01:10:13,918 --> 01:10:15,295
Fuck.
1413
01:10:15,461 --> 01:10:17,088
I wanna win. I wanna...
1414
01:10:17,255 --> 01:10:19,223
HYRUM: Your contract's
been terminated.
1415
01:10:19,382 --> 01:10:22,010
Uh... I'm sorry. What?
1416
01:10:22,176 --> 01:10:24,019
You're on a flight
at 10:00pm tonight.
1417
01:10:31,811 --> 01:10:33,905
No?
1418
01:10:35,481 --> 01:10:37,233
(SNIFFS)
1419
01:10:39,444 --> 01:10:41,913
What are you doing?
1420
01:10:42,071 --> 01:10:44,324
Get the fuck out of my face.
1421
01:10:45,742 --> 01:10:47,870
- You wanna swing at me?
- You wanna swing at me?
1422
01:10:54,292 --> 01:10:56,294
(HAND SLAPS)
1423
01:10:56,461 --> 01:10:58,259
You're a fucking pussy.
1424
01:11:06,846 --> 01:11:09,019
(SNORTS, SPITS)
1425
01:11:10,641 --> 01:11:13,770
('LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT' BY LUSH)
1426
01:11:15,855 --> 01:11:18,608
I-I'm just saying,
1427
01:11:18,775 --> 01:11:21,904
you're pissed at Doug
because he's a hockey player
1428
01:11:22,069 --> 01:11:24,071
and he wants to play hockey.
1429
01:11:24,238 --> 01:11:28,163
He was fucking bare-knuckle
prize-fighting too. Jesus!
1430
01:11:28,326 --> 01:11:30,875
- Whose side are you on?
- (SNIFFS)
1431
01:11:31,037 --> 01:11:33,790
We both agreed to do this
and we both gave shit up.
1432
01:11:33,956 --> 01:11:35,333
That's what growing up is.
1433
01:11:35,500 --> 01:11:38,344
I-I had shit
that I liked doing too.
1434
01:11:38,503 --> 01:11:41,256
(SNORTS) Jägerbombs?
1435
01:11:41,422 --> 01:11:43,891
Look, I know
you sacrificed things.
1436
01:11:44,050 --> 01:11:47,020
I mean, you have a fucking baby
growing in your belly. I get it.
1437
01:11:47,178 --> 01:11:52,526
I just... I think that Doug's team
is more than just hockey,
1438
01:11:52,683 --> 01:11:54,230
you know?
1439
01:11:56,938 --> 01:11:59,316
More than a team, even.
1440
01:12:08,574 --> 01:12:10,417
JAMES: Highlanders GM Hyrum Cain
1441
01:12:10,576 --> 01:12:11,953
confirming that Anders Cain
1442
01:12:12,119 --> 01:12:13,541
has been released
from his contract.
1443
01:12:13,704 --> 01:12:16,173
Let this be a lesson
to everyone out there.
1444
01:12:16,332 --> 01:12:18,710
Your father
will break your heart,
1445
01:12:18,876 --> 01:12:20,878
and then he'll shove it down
your fuckin' throat,
1446
01:12:21,045 --> 01:12:23,673
pull it out your ass,
put it right back in your chest.
1447
01:12:23,840 --> 01:12:27,140
JAMES: No word on whether
Hyrum Cain plans to replace Anders
1448
01:12:27,301 --> 01:12:30,054
as the Highlanders round out
their season with must-win games
1449
01:12:30,221 --> 01:12:31,768
at home against the Lovell Kings
1450
01:12:31,931 --> 01:12:35,777
and Anders' old team,
the Reading Wolfdogs.
1451
01:12:39,063 --> 01:12:41,612
('FLY AT NIGHT' BY CHILLIWACK)
1452
01:12:41,774 --> 01:12:42,821
(SIGHS)
1453
01:12:46,028 --> 01:12:49,157
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
1454
01:12:52,451 --> 01:12:55,421
Stevesy, Legs, Geno,
you know what you need to do.
1455
01:12:55,580 --> 01:12:57,924
Eat up minutes.
Grind the shit out of them.
1456
01:12:58,082 --> 01:13:00,005
Make them fuck up.
1457
01:13:00,167 --> 01:13:03,546
Tonight, we need to play
fucking hard.
1458
01:13:03,713 --> 01:13:05,215
- Right, boys?
- Yeah.
1459
01:13:05,381 --> 01:13:07,258
- Alright, boys?!
- Yeah!
1460
01:13:07,425 --> 01:13:09,098
Let's fucking do this.
1461
01:13:09,260 --> 01:13:11,012
ROSS: So, you pussies
playing hockey or what?
1462
01:13:12,889 --> 01:13:14,266
Wow.
1463
01:13:14,432 --> 01:13:16,810
(BELL TOLLS)
1464
01:13:16,976 --> 01:13:18,819
I messed up, Pat.
1465
01:13:18,978 --> 01:13:22,357
You know, I really like
living with you in the motel,
1466
01:13:22,523 --> 01:13:24,321
but I just kind of
wanna go home now.
1467
01:13:24,483 --> 01:13:26,952
Yeah, no, I-I get that.
It's, uh... (SNIFFS)
1468
01:13:27,111 --> 01:13:28,613
It's definitely not the Ritz,
1469
01:13:28,779 --> 01:13:31,623
but so long as Sherilynn owns it,
it's a bed and it's free,
1470
01:13:31,782 --> 01:13:34,205
thanks to that deal
I cut with her.
1471
01:13:34,368 --> 01:13:35,790
What kind of deal?
1472
01:13:35,953 --> 01:13:38,172
Fucking the shit out of her
constantly.
1473
01:13:38,331 --> 01:13:39,833
Your cousin Sherilynn?
1474
01:13:39,999 --> 01:13:43,173
I don't think I'm the only dude
she's fuckin',
1475
01:13:43,336 --> 01:13:45,885
but then she's not the only dude
I'm fuckin'.
1476
01:13:47,632 --> 01:13:49,885
(PHONE RINGS)
1477
01:13:51,260 --> 01:13:53,137
Eva? Hello?
1478
01:13:53,304 --> 01:13:55,147
EVA ON PHONE: Uh, hey.
Doug, um...
1479
01:13:55,306 --> 01:13:58,105
Eva, hello! It's me, Doug Glatt.
1480
01:13:58,267 --> 01:14:00,235
Uh, Doug, where are you?
1481
01:14:00,394 --> 01:14:02,738
DOUG ON PHONE:
I'm sorry I broke my promise.
1482
01:14:03,940 --> 01:14:07,319
I shouldn't have done that,
because we're a team.
1483
01:14:07,485 --> 01:14:09,579
I'm so in love with you.
1484
01:14:09,737 --> 01:14:11,865
We're gonna have a family,
and I swear...
1485
01:14:12,031 --> 01:14:14,329
Uh, Doug, my water broke.
1486
01:14:14,492 --> 01:14:17,462
It's OK. I can just buy you
another one at the gas station.
1487
01:14:17,620 --> 01:14:19,998
No, no! My water broke!
1488
01:14:20,164 --> 01:14:23,088
The baby, uh...
The baby's coming.
1489
01:14:23,250 --> 01:14:24,172
What?
1490
01:14:24,335 --> 01:14:27,009
What? What? What? What?
What? What? What? What?
1491
01:14:27,171 --> 01:14:29,219
What? What? Now?
Wait. What? What?
1492
01:14:29,382 --> 01:14:31,635
Mary's at the store... at the store,
so I'm all alone.
1493
01:14:31,801 --> 01:14:35,226
No, you're not. Like the baby,
I'm also coming now.
1494
01:14:35,388 --> 01:14:37,061
OK. OK.
1495
01:14:37,223 --> 01:14:38,975
- (TYRES SCREECH)
- Holy fucking cunt balls!
1496
01:14:39,141 --> 01:14:41,109
- It's happening!
- Keep your eyes on the road.
1497
01:14:41,268 --> 01:14:43,020
Oh, yeah. So sorry.
So sorry. So sorry.
1498
01:14:43,187 --> 01:14:44,814
But, Eva,
I just gotta tell you,
1499
01:14:44,981 --> 01:14:47,325
you, my dear,
are gonna look fucking radiant
1500
01:14:47,483 --> 01:14:48,860
during childbirth.
1501
01:14:49,026 --> 01:14:50,403
I am so sorry.
1502
01:14:50,569 --> 01:14:52,913
From now on, whatever we do,
we do as a team, OK?
1503
01:14:53,072 --> 01:14:54,824
You know,
there's just this natural beauty
1504
01:14:54,991 --> 01:14:56,584
that comes from
such a violent act -
1505
01:14:56,742 --> 01:14:58,915
the blood and the fucking pussy
ripping open.
1506
01:14:59,078 --> 01:15:00,455
Yeah, I'm gonna be
the best husband
1507
01:15:00,621 --> 01:15:02,214
and the best father I can be.
1508
01:15:02,373 --> 01:15:03,795
I'll just say it -
to me, no woman,
1509
01:15:03,958 --> 01:15:05,335
no fuckin' woman
is more beautiful
1510
01:15:05,501 --> 01:15:06,878
than when she's giving birth.
1511
01:15:07,044 --> 01:15:08,421
Could we, uh...
Guys, that's great.
1512
01:15:08,587 --> 01:15:10,134
Could we have no talking
for a bit?
1513
01:15:10,297 --> 01:15:11,970
Yeah. Of course.
Whatever you need.
1514
01:15:12,133 --> 01:15:13,510
- Hey! Goddamn it!
- (HORN TOOTS)
1515
01:15:13,676 --> 01:15:16,805
What the fuck? What, is
everyone in this city Chinese?
1516
01:15:16,971 --> 01:15:19,599
RED: Oh, no!
Down goes Stevenson!
1517
01:15:19,765 --> 01:15:21,187
Jesus Christ!
1518
01:15:21,350 --> 01:15:23,569
Come on! This is not how
we kill a fucking penalty!
1519
01:15:23,728 --> 01:15:25,355
Come on, Stevesy!
You're good, you're good.
1520
01:15:25,521 --> 01:15:27,523
LaFlamme, come on. Come on.
Good, get out.
1521
01:15:27,690 --> 01:15:29,067
- Watch the point!
- Sit down.
1522
01:15:29,233 --> 01:15:32,578
Rest that fuckin' ass.
Where the fuck is he?
1523
01:15:32,737 --> 01:15:35,115
Hortense keeps looking over
toward the dressing room.
1524
01:15:35,281 --> 01:15:37,750
DOUG: Breathe, Eva, breathe.
1525
01:15:37,908 --> 01:15:39,910
- OK?
- EVA: OK.
1526
01:15:40,077 --> 01:15:43,251
Deep, slow breaths.
Breathe, Eva. Breathe.
1527
01:15:43,414 --> 01:15:45,587
(PUNCHES THUD)
1528
01:15:45,750 --> 01:15:48,970
(ROSS GRUNTS, ROARS)
1529
01:15:49,128 --> 01:15:50,630
RED: Lovell and Halifax,
1530
01:15:50,796 --> 01:15:52,924
now LaFlamme goes after
the puck in the corner.
1531
01:15:53,090 --> 01:15:54,842
He takes it in behind the...
Here it comes!
1532
01:15:55,009 --> 01:15:57,853
Oh! It's...
Oh! And down goes LaFlamme.
1533
01:15:58,012 --> 01:16:01,266
Now Owens is bumped by...
Ross Rhea?
1534
01:16:01,432 --> 01:16:04,527
- Nice hit, eh?
- Better late than never.
1535
01:16:04,685 --> 01:16:06,312
Ross Rhea is back!
1536
01:16:06,479 --> 01:16:07,605
(EVA PANTS, GASPS)
1537
01:16:07,772 --> 01:16:10,241
DOCTOR: One last big push.
Can you do that for me, Eva?
1538
01:16:10,399 --> 01:16:12,072
RED: He's back as a Highlander!
1539
01:16:12,234 --> 01:16:14,328
You know, son,
generally, it's polite to ask.
1540
01:16:14,487 --> 01:16:17,115
Go watch some curling and get
a fucking dye job, you old man.
1541
01:16:17,281 --> 01:16:18,453
- Fuck you.
- (GRUNTS)
1542
01:16:18,616 --> 01:16:20,118
- Come on, Eva.
- DOCTOR: That's it. OK, Eva.
1543
01:16:20,284 --> 01:16:22,787
- DOCTOR: Home stretch.
- (SCREAMS)
1544
01:16:22,953 --> 01:16:25,923
RED: Ross Rhea fires
that patented right...
1545
01:16:26,082 --> 01:16:28,551
(GROANS)
1546
01:16:28,709 --> 01:16:31,633
(BABY CRIES)
1547
01:16:33,589 --> 01:16:34,966
(GRUNTS)
1548
01:16:35,132 --> 01:16:37,134
- RED: We thought he was done!
- Old man, eh?
1549
01:16:37,301 --> 01:16:38,928
And he's back in style.
1550
01:16:39,095 --> 01:16:41,814
('CAN'T SLEEP'
BY THE ADAM BROWN)
1551
01:16:41,972 --> 01:16:46,978
♪ I can't sleep tonight
I can't sleep tonight. ♪
1552
01:16:47,144 --> 01:16:49,146
(BABIES CRY IN DISTANCE)
1553
01:16:49,313 --> 01:16:52,157
- (PAT PASSES WIND)
- Pat...
1554
01:17:01,951 --> 01:17:04,670
- Hey, hey, hey!
- (GASPS)
1555
01:17:04,829 --> 01:17:06,877
Yeah!
1556
01:17:09,083 --> 01:17:11,177
(PLAYERS MURMUR)
1557
01:17:13,420 --> 01:17:14,922
Nice shot, man.
1558
01:17:15,089 --> 01:17:17,387
Let me know if
you're not gonna keep it, OK?
1559
01:17:17,550 --> 01:17:20,099
- Yeah, we're gonna keep it.
- Let me know.
1560
01:17:21,887 --> 01:17:24,310
Fuckin' weirdo.
1561
01:17:24,473 --> 01:17:26,225
Everyone OK in there?
1562
01:17:26,392 --> 01:17:29,191
Everybody's great.
1563
01:17:29,353 --> 01:17:31,481
Welcome to the Highlanders.
1564
01:17:32,690 --> 01:17:35,159
Looks like I'm not done
after all, eh?
1565
01:17:36,318 --> 01:17:37,911
Mazel tov, kiddo.
1566
01:17:39,446 --> 01:17:41,540
Hey!
1567
01:17:41,699 --> 01:17:46,500
A dick explodes, a baby is made
and a father is born.
1568
01:17:50,749 --> 01:17:52,376
I love you.
1569
01:17:55,045 --> 01:17:56,467
All these kisses.
1570
01:17:56,630 --> 01:18:00,476
- I will love your baby.
- Thank you so much.
1571
01:18:00,634 --> 01:18:02,227
That's so nice.
1572
01:18:02,386 --> 01:18:05,105
I'm a great babysitter, so I...
Not that you...
1573
01:18:05,264 --> 01:18:06,811
Oh, OK. (CHUCKLES)
1574
01:18:09,977 --> 01:18:12,025
You have my back.
1575
01:18:12,188 --> 01:18:14,316
You have since we met,
1576
01:18:14,481 --> 01:18:18,577
and you need to know
I'll always have yours.
1577
01:18:19,945 --> 01:18:21,663
Something for the baby.
1578
01:18:32,625 --> 01:18:35,128
It's official. It's official.
1579
01:18:35,294 --> 01:18:37,342
- MAN: Go, Dougie.
- MAN 2: You go, Dougie.
1580
01:18:38,631 --> 01:18:41,430
- (MEN CHEER)
- I love you, buddy.
1581
01:18:41,592 --> 01:18:43,344
(SPEAKS FRENCH)
1582
01:18:43,510 --> 01:18:45,729
- Way to go, Dougie!
- Good boy!
1583
01:18:47,139 --> 01:18:49,733
(SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
1584
01:18:52,895 --> 01:18:55,614
...Doug.
1585
01:18:55,773 --> 01:18:58,993
- (KISSES)
- Thank you.
1586
01:19:00,402 --> 01:19:01,779
(CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY)
1587
01:19:01,946 --> 01:19:04,040
(WHISPERS) I don't know
who he is.
1588
01:19:09,662 --> 01:19:12,131
I love you, Eva.
1589
01:19:12,289 --> 01:19:15,133
Mm. I love you too, Doug.
1590
01:19:16,585 --> 01:19:20,510
Mm. (GIGGLES)
1591
01:19:20,673 --> 01:19:22,801
Damn!
1592
01:19:22,967 --> 01:19:26,016
I'm high as fuckin' balls.
1593
01:19:26,178 --> 01:19:28,431
Just big ol' balls.
1594
01:19:28,597 --> 01:19:33,023
PS, fuckin' pushing a baby
out your vagina blows hard.
1595
01:19:33,185 --> 01:19:35,358
I know.
1596
01:19:36,480 --> 01:19:38,903
But you were here.
1597
01:19:40,985 --> 01:19:43,454
I needed you and you were here.
1598
01:19:45,864 --> 01:19:48,458
It's the same shit, Doug.
1599
01:19:49,994 --> 01:19:52,042
It's the same shit
that brought you here
1600
01:19:52,204 --> 01:19:55,708
is the shit that needs you
to be out there.
1601
01:19:57,918 --> 01:19:59,886
They need you too.
1602
01:20:01,922 --> 01:20:04,141
Highlanders need you.
1603
01:20:07,386 --> 01:20:11,357
Doug, you need to be out there.
1604
01:20:15,311 --> 01:20:17,655
JAMES: This is it.
The last game of the season.
1605
01:20:17,813 --> 01:20:19,531
The Highlanders
need one more win
1606
01:20:19,690 --> 01:20:22,284
after their gutsy
2-1 victory over Lovell.
1607
01:20:22,443 --> 01:20:23,990
CHAD: And now, tonight,
1608
01:20:24,153 --> 01:20:26,372
their entire season
hangs on this one last game,
1609
01:20:26,530 --> 01:20:28,373
which should be a doozy
1610
01:20:28,532 --> 01:20:30,785
as it marks Cain's return
to the Halifax MetroCentre
1611
01:20:30,951 --> 01:20:34,125
in his first game back since
re-signing with the Wolfdogs.
1612
01:20:34,288 --> 01:20:35,710
REPORTER: Any message
for your former teammates?
1613
01:20:35,873 --> 01:20:37,170
Watch your back.
1614
01:20:37,333 --> 01:20:41,258
- Cain's gonna be out there.
- PARK: Fuck Cain.
1615
01:20:41,420 --> 01:20:44,139
The shape your shoulder's in,
you tweak it,
1616
01:20:44,298 --> 01:20:46,596
you throw one heavy punch
with that right,
1617
01:20:46,759 --> 01:20:48,932
that's your career fucked
for good.
1618
01:20:49,094 --> 01:20:50,767
I need to protect my team.
1619
01:20:50,929 --> 01:20:53,182
We're having
a very busy night here.
1620
01:20:56,518 --> 01:21:01,866
Xavier, you've been whatever
this team has needed you to be.
1621
01:21:02,024 --> 01:21:04,743
You've worked, you've bled.
1622
01:21:07,029 --> 01:21:08,997
(CLEARS THROAT) I, uh...
1623
01:21:09,156 --> 01:21:11,705
I unstitched it
from Cain's jersey.
1624
01:21:14,161 --> 01:21:16,664
It's yours now.
You've earned it.
1625
01:21:18,582 --> 01:21:22,052
(PLAYERS CHEER, APPLAUD)
1626
01:21:22,211 --> 01:21:24,179
RONNIE: Flammer, Flammer,
come on.
1627
01:21:29,635 --> 01:21:31,182
(CHUCKLES)
1628
01:21:32,638 --> 01:21:34,015
(CHUCKLES)
1629
01:21:34,181 --> 01:21:37,276
I learned the difference
between a moment and a career
1630
01:21:37,434 --> 01:21:39,436
is evolution.
1631
01:21:40,479 --> 01:21:42,322
Evolution.
1632
01:21:42,481 --> 01:21:45,075
You will slow down.
1633
01:21:45,234 --> 01:21:47,407
You will get old.
1634
01:21:47,569 --> 01:21:50,664
Your body will fail you.
1635
01:21:50,823 --> 01:21:53,702
So you evolve.
1636
01:21:53,867 --> 01:21:56,336
You change your game.
1637
01:21:56,495 --> 01:21:59,169
You do what you need to do
with the time you got.
1638
01:22:00,791 --> 01:22:03,761
If not, you go extinct.
1639
01:22:06,004 --> 01:22:09,474
Evolve or go extinct.
1640
01:22:12,010 --> 01:22:14,012
- Are you ready to go extinct?
- No, I am not.
1641
01:22:14,179 --> 01:22:16,477
- No fuckin' way.
- Are you fucking extinct?
1642
01:22:16,640 --> 01:22:18,813
- No!
- No, absolutely not.
1643
01:22:18,976 --> 01:22:20,774
Well, I'm still here.
1644
01:22:20,936 --> 01:22:23,485
I'm not ready to go
fucking extinct.
1645
01:22:23,647 --> 01:22:26,696
- The Highlanders are still here!
- Yeah, we are.
1646
01:22:26,859 --> 01:22:28,953
The fucking Highlanders
are here!
1647
01:22:29,111 --> 01:22:30,704
(PLAYERS CHEER)
1648
01:22:30,863 --> 01:22:33,742
(ALL CHANT) Highlanders!
Highlanders!
1649
01:22:33,907 --> 01:22:36,877
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1650
01:22:37,035 --> 01:22:40,335
- Highlanders! Highlanders!
- (LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY)
1651
01:22:40,497 --> 01:22:44,092
Highlanders! Highlanders!
Highlanders!
1652
01:22:44,251 --> 01:22:45,844
- Alright, boys?
- (CHANTING CONTINUES)
1653
01:22:46,003 --> 01:22:47,755
Let's do this! Come on!
1654
01:22:47,921 --> 01:22:49,764
RED: This is it, folks.
1655
01:22:49,923 --> 01:22:51,470
It's do or die
for the Highlanders tonight.
1656
01:22:51,633 --> 01:22:54,432
Their entire season
comes down to this one game.
1657
01:22:54,595 --> 01:22:56,563
It's that simple.
1658
01:22:57,890 --> 01:23:00,734
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
1659
01:23:00,893 --> 01:23:03,567
- Fuck 'em up!
- Come on!
1660
01:23:03,729 --> 01:23:07,484
Which one do you want?
I got the big one.
1661
01:23:07,649 --> 01:23:09,367
Ah, fuck it.
I want both of 'em.
1662
01:23:12,029 --> 01:23:13,952
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
1663
01:23:15,657 --> 01:23:18,456
It's open season on all your
fucking boys tonight, Doug.
1664
01:23:18,619 --> 01:23:22,590
- I don't have to fight you.
- Yeah, you do.
1665
01:23:29,796 --> 01:23:32,424
RED: So it's a must-win
for the Halifax Highlanders.
1666
01:23:32,591 --> 01:23:34,844
There's no tomorrow
if they don't.
1667
01:23:35,010 --> 01:23:36,887
Guys, listen,
I got some changes here.
1668
01:23:37,054 --> 01:23:39,853
Flammer, Dougie, Rhea,
off the hop,
1669
01:23:40,015 --> 01:23:41,733
Legs and Geno on the back end.
1670
01:23:41,892 --> 01:23:44,691
OK, boys, let's go.
Game faces, focus.
1671
01:23:44,853 --> 01:23:46,776
They're gonna try and taunt us.
Don't look for shit.
1672
01:23:46,939 --> 01:23:49,533
Now Doug Glatt comes out
to take the opening faceoff
1673
01:23:49,691 --> 01:23:53,696
alongside Ross Rhea,
former combatants.
1674
01:23:53,862 --> 01:23:57,082
Hey, big fella.
You like Kim Mitchell?
1675
01:23:57,241 --> 01:23:58,834
That's what I thought.
1676
01:23:58,992 --> 01:24:00,869
- Alright. We're fuckin' going.
- (WHISTLE TOOTS)
1677
01:24:01,036 --> 01:24:03,334
- Alright, here we go.
- What the fuck did I just say?
1678
01:24:03,497 --> 01:24:05,670
Coach said don't look for shit.
That's shit.
1679
01:24:05,832 --> 01:24:08,176
I bet you don't like Rush either,
you fuckin' big Litvak.
1680
01:24:08,335 --> 01:24:10,884
He's looking for shit.
Goddamn it, laid 'em right out.
1681
01:24:11,046 --> 01:24:13,344
Jesus Christ,
what are they feeding ya?
1682
01:24:13,507 --> 01:24:15,384
A lot of fuckin' pierogis, eh?
1683
01:24:15,551 --> 01:24:19,522
Easy, big fella.
Alright. Here we go.
1684
01:24:21,265 --> 01:24:23,393
- (SPECTATORS CHEER)
- (BOTH GRUNT)
1685
01:24:23,559 --> 01:24:25,857
- (BLOW SQUELCHES)
- (GRUNTS)
1686
01:24:33,777 --> 01:24:35,905
RED: Well, folks,
big girls may not cry...
1687
01:24:36,071 --> 01:24:37,448
How about that, eh?
1688
01:24:37,614 --> 01:24:40,242
...but big men from Eastern Europe
apparently bleed a lot.
1689
01:24:40,409 --> 01:24:43,458
Fuckin' right!
I can do this all night, boys.
1690
01:24:44,496 --> 01:24:46,544
You're gonna leave this building
in an ambulance.
1691
01:24:46,707 --> 01:24:47,959
Sorry, Point Break.
You say something?
1692
01:24:48,125 --> 01:24:49,877
- Rosser, Rosser, nah, nah.
- Come on, boy.
1693
01:24:50,043 --> 01:24:52,045
- You can come play.
- It's over. Go to the box.
1694
01:24:52,212 --> 01:24:54,965
No? Alright. You sure?
1695
01:24:55,132 --> 01:24:57,351
Oh! No.
He doesn't wanna fucking play.
1696
01:24:57,509 --> 01:24:59,853
- Let's go.
- (GRUNTS)
1697
01:25:00,012 --> 01:25:01,639
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
1698
01:25:03,223 --> 01:25:05,442
RED: So at the faceoff,
the puck is dropped.
1699
01:25:05,601 --> 01:25:06,978
It goes back to Anders Cain.
1700
01:25:07,144 --> 01:25:08,817
The former captain
of the Halifax Highlanders
1701
01:25:08,979 --> 01:25:10,856
bounces off a check,
moves up the right wing
1702
01:25:11,023 --> 01:25:13,947
moves right in on goal,
trying to bang it by Belchior.
1703
01:25:14,109 --> 01:25:18,205
Runs into Ahmed.
They count the goal. Should it count?
1704
01:25:18,363 --> 01:25:20,286
- Where's the fucking whistle?!
- Where the fuck's the whistle?
1705
01:25:20,449 --> 01:25:22,122
Cheap fucking goal.
1706
01:25:22,284 --> 01:25:25,834
So, the Highlanders down 1-0
in the second period,
1707
01:25:25,996 --> 01:25:27,373
a game they have to win.
1708
01:25:27,539 --> 01:25:29,633
And here comes LaFlamme,
dancing up the centre ice.
1709
01:25:29,791 --> 01:25:31,293
LaFlamme makes a move,
1710
01:25:31,460 --> 01:25:33,053
dipsy-doodle, heads toward
the front of the net.
1711
01:25:33,211 --> 01:25:36,135
Flips it back.
Yakovlena. He scores!
1712
01:25:36,298 --> 01:25:37,675
- (SPECTATORS CHEER)
- Yes!
1713
01:25:37,841 --> 01:25:41,186
(SOFTLY) Yes. Yes. Yes.
- Evgeni Yakovlena...
1714
01:25:41,345 --> 01:25:42,437
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
1715
01:25:42,596 --> 01:25:47,318
ANNOUNCER: ...scored by number 6,
Evgeni Yakovlena.
1716
01:25:47,476 --> 01:25:49,069
RED: So it's 1-1
in the second period.
1717
01:25:49,227 --> 01:25:51,275
Here once again is LaFlamme...
(SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
1718
01:25:51,438 --> 01:25:53,532
Oh! Was he hammered!
1719
01:25:53,690 --> 01:25:55,237
- GORD: Horseshit!
- RONNIE: Fucking bullshit!
1720
01:25:55,400 --> 01:25:57,903
- Put me in right fucking now.
- You've done enough for tonight.
1721
01:25:58,070 --> 01:25:59,617
- Fucking asshole.
- We'll get him.
1722
01:25:59,780 --> 01:26:02,750
- That's fucking bullshit.
- He's a fucking lunatic!
1723
01:26:02,908 --> 01:26:05,411
(GRUNTS)
1724
01:26:05,577 --> 01:26:07,204
Now the puck finds its way
to Glatt.
1725
01:26:07,371 --> 01:26:08,998
- They're normally strangers.
- Dougie!
1726
01:26:09,164 --> 01:26:10,916
- (GRUNTS)
- Holy cow!
1727
01:26:11,083 --> 01:26:12,630
- Jesus.
- Thanks, X!
1728
01:26:12,793 --> 01:26:15,763
- Did you see that?!
- That's Captain A.
1729
01:26:15,921 --> 01:26:19,516
It was LaFlamme who ran into
and decked Cain!
1730
01:26:19,675 --> 01:26:21,268
Flammer's loaded for bear.
1731
01:26:21,426 --> 01:26:24,270
Here comes LaFlamme,
makes a move around the defender,
1732
01:26:24,429 --> 01:26:25,806
moves right in on the goal.
1733
01:26:25,972 --> 01:26:28,441
Magic hands.
Great save by Nicholai.
1734
01:26:28,600 --> 01:26:31,319
Watch Flammer's back. Do what
you gotta do, but keep it clean.
1735
01:26:31,478 --> 01:26:33,276
Six minutes left
in the third period.
1736
01:26:33,438 --> 01:26:36,567
Halifax and Reading
still tied at a goal apiece.
1737
01:26:37,693 --> 01:26:39,821
- Take ice away! Come on!
- Here's Anders Cain.
1738
01:26:39,986 --> 01:26:41,988
- Cain gets it over to Totan.
- Get on the puck!
1739
01:26:42,155 --> 01:26:44,123
Totan looks back,
returns it to Cain.
1740
01:26:44,282 --> 01:26:46,410
(SPECTATORS BOO AND JEER)
1741
01:26:48,036 --> 01:26:50,710
What is this you're doing?
Make shoot!
1742
01:26:50,872 --> 01:26:52,590
Cain seems to be
in the midst of
1743
01:26:52,749 --> 01:26:55,172
some sort of psycho-athletic
fugue state.
1744
01:26:55,335 --> 01:26:57,303
Fuckin' make shoot!
1745
01:26:59,172 --> 01:27:00,424
(GLASS SHATTERS)
1746
01:27:00,590 --> 01:27:03,139
- (SPECTATORS EXCLAIM)
- Mother of God!
1747
01:27:03,301 --> 01:27:04,848
- Holy snappin' arseholes.
- What the fuck's he doing?
1748
01:27:05,011 --> 01:27:06,558
- Right off his rocker.
- What's he fuckin' doing?
1749
01:27:06,722 --> 01:27:08,065
What the fuck?
1750
01:27:08,223 --> 01:27:11,022
Cain seems to have actually
fired the puck
1751
01:27:11,184 --> 01:27:13,562
into his father's
loge accommodations.
1752
01:27:13,729 --> 01:27:15,652
- (WHISTLE TOOTS)
- You gonna call that or what?
1753
01:27:17,023 --> 01:27:19,321
Now Anders Cain
takes a shot at LaFlamme.
1754
01:27:19,484 --> 01:27:21,828
- Come on!
- LaFlamme punches back at Cain.
1755
01:27:21,987 --> 01:27:24,365
Ross Rhea steps in.
Cain gives a right.
1756
01:27:24,531 --> 01:27:26,283
What the fuck was that?
1757
01:27:26,450 --> 01:27:28,327
ROSS: I'm gonna teach you
some fuckin' manners, son.
1758
01:27:28,493 --> 01:27:32,248
He has gone absolutely bonkers
in this game here tonight.
1759
01:27:32,414 --> 01:27:35,793
Now he goes to the penalty box.
So does Ross Rhea.
1760
01:27:35,959 --> 01:27:37,336
WOMAN: Fuck you, Cain!
1761
01:27:37,502 --> 01:27:40,221
ANNOUNCER OVER P.A.:
Halifax number three, Ross Rhea,
1762
01:27:40,380 --> 01:27:43,179
Reading number 13, Anders Cain.
1763
01:27:43,341 --> 01:27:47,016
- Getting tired?
- Dude, I'm always tired.
1764
01:27:48,096 --> 01:27:49,769
'Cause you're
an old piece of shit.
1765
01:27:49,931 --> 01:27:51,558
You got me there.
1766
01:27:52,893 --> 01:27:55,237
This old piece of shit's gonna
take your fuckin' head off.
1767
01:27:55,395 --> 01:27:57,898
Rhea! Get your ass
back to the bench!
1768
01:27:58,064 --> 01:27:59,441
RONNIE: We're gonna
kill this thing.
1769
01:27:59,608 --> 01:28:01,986
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
1770
01:28:04,905 --> 01:28:06,327
Good luck, kid.
1771
01:28:08,408 --> 01:28:10,456
The two combatants
step back out on the ice...
1772
01:28:10,619 --> 01:28:12,417
Where are you going?
What are you doing?
1773
01:28:12,579 --> 01:28:14,707
...and immediately
Rhea begins to chase Cain.
1774
01:28:14,873 --> 01:28:16,216
Rhea!
1775
01:28:17,375 --> 01:28:19,093
The puck is still in
Reading territory.
1776
01:28:19,252 --> 01:28:20,754
Now it's knocked back
to the blue line.
1777
01:28:20,921 --> 01:28:22,798
Here's a shot on goal.
A save is made.
1778
01:28:22,964 --> 01:28:25,763
Puck goes into the corner.
Rhea goes in after it.
1779
01:28:25,926 --> 01:28:29,305
- Anders, no.
- And going after Rhea is Cain.
1780
01:28:29,471 --> 01:28:31,565
- (IMPACT THUDS)
- No!
1781
01:28:31,723 --> 01:28:34,567
I told you you'd end up in
a fucking ambulance.
1782
01:28:34,726 --> 01:28:37,775
- You fucking piece of shit!
- Get the fuck out of here, Cain.
1783
01:28:37,938 --> 01:28:40,236
Rhea is down. He's bloodied.
1784
01:28:40,398 --> 01:28:42,492
He may well be unconscious.
1785
01:28:42,651 --> 01:28:45,074
- (PLAYERS YELL)
- Motherfucker!
1786
01:28:45,237 --> 01:28:47,410
Let's get the board out.
Let's get him on the stretcher.
1787
01:28:47,572 --> 01:28:49,995
They're bringing out
the stretcher.
1788
01:28:50,158 --> 01:28:52,411
Rhea is down, folks.
He's bleeding.
1789
01:28:52,577 --> 01:28:54,170
This doesn't look good.
1790
01:28:54,329 --> 01:28:57,458
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
1791
01:28:59,626 --> 01:29:01,003
Hm.
1792
01:29:06,049 --> 01:29:07,642
- Doug.
- Shit.
1793
01:29:07,801 --> 01:29:09,769
OK, up, back down. OK.
1794
01:29:09,928 --> 01:29:11,430
Ladies and gentlemen,
1795
01:29:11,596 --> 01:29:14,019
Doug 'The Thug' Glatt
is entering the fray.
1796
01:29:14,182 --> 01:29:17,186
He's making a beeline
for Anders Cain.
1797
01:29:17,352 --> 01:29:20,697
This could only mean one thing.
1798
01:29:20,856 --> 01:29:22,449
I thought you didn't need to
fight me, Doug.
1799
01:29:22,607 --> 01:29:24,109
ROSS: Lay him the fuck out, kid.
1800
01:29:27,737 --> 01:29:28,738
(SOFTLY) Doug...
1801
01:29:28,905 --> 01:29:31,078
This is for someone else.
1802
01:29:32,284 --> 01:29:34,002
(BLOW SQUELCHES)
1803
01:29:36,955 --> 01:29:37,831
(GRUNTS)
1804
01:29:37,998 --> 01:29:39,796
(BLOWS THUD)
1805
01:29:39,958 --> 01:29:42,677
(BOTH GRUNT)
1806
01:29:42,836 --> 01:29:45,931
Cain and Glatt going at each other
one after the other.
1807
01:29:46,089 --> 01:29:48,638
- One, two, three.
- (SCREAMS)
1808
01:29:48,800 --> 01:29:50,598
- Oh, he hammers Glatt.
- (SPECTATORS GROAN)
1809
01:29:50,760 --> 01:29:52,762
- Fuck.
- Blood spews.
1810
01:29:52,929 --> 01:29:55,478
- (GRUNTS)
- Oh!
1811
01:29:59,769 --> 01:30:03,239
And these guys are being
left to their own devices.
1812
01:30:03,398 --> 01:30:06,151
(BOTH GRUNT)
1813
01:30:08,612 --> 01:30:11,115
- Yes!
- These men are wild.
1814
01:30:11,281 --> 01:30:14,034
They're crazy.
There's blood everywhere.
1815
01:30:16,328 --> 01:30:18,126
Attaboy, Dougie.
1816
01:30:19,456 --> 01:30:23,086
I'm glad you came back, Doug!
Come on!
1817
01:30:23,251 --> 01:30:25,253
(ROARS)
1818
01:30:26,296 --> 01:30:29,425
- (IMPACT CRUNCHES)
- (SCREAMS)
1819
01:30:34,638 --> 01:30:36,640
- (BLOWS THUD)
- (GRUNTS)
1820
01:30:36,806 --> 01:30:39,935
Oh, blood and gore
all over the floor!
1821
01:30:42,812 --> 01:30:45,565
The linesmen
are nowhere to be seen.
1822
01:30:45,732 --> 01:30:47,234
You can't blame them.
1823
01:30:47,400 --> 01:30:51,030
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
1824
01:30:52,697 --> 01:30:54,290
- (GRUNTS)
- (SPECTATORS EXCLAIM)
1825
01:30:54,449 --> 01:30:55,746
(GASPS)
1826
01:30:58,411 --> 01:31:01,005
(SPECTATORS CHANT)
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
1827
01:31:01,164 --> 01:31:03,542
Do it. Do it, Doug.
1828
01:31:04,960 --> 01:31:06,803
Take his fucking head off!
1829
01:31:06,962 --> 01:31:09,340
(SPECTATORS CHANT)
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
1830
01:31:09,506 --> 01:31:11,759
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
1831
01:31:11,925 --> 01:31:12,972
Do it.
1832
01:31:13,134 --> 01:31:16,388
- (GROANS WEAKLY)
- No.
1833
01:31:18,890 --> 01:31:20,312
It's over.
1834
01:31:20,475 --> 01:31:22,944
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
1835
01:31:24,896 --> 01:31:26,898
It's never over.
1836
01:31:29,025 --> 01:31:31,119
We're gonna do this
night after night...
1837
01:31:32,904 --> 01:31:36,454
...game after fucking game.
1838
01:31:36,616 --> 01:31:38,744
You hear me, Doug?
1839
01:31:38,910 --> 01:31:43,541
Game after fucking game!
1840
01:31:44,749 --> 01:31:47,844
- Look up there, Doug.
- (HEARTBEAT REVERBERATES)
1841
01:31:48,003 --> 01:31:51,633
ANDERS: Look at 'em! This is it!
1842
01:31:53,133 --> 01:31:56,103
This is what
they want us to do!
1843
01:31:56,261 --> 01:31:58,810
I do whatever my team
needs me to do.
1844
01:31:58,972 --> 01:32:00,940
ANDERS: We're just gonna keep
fucking bleeding out here...
1845
01:32:01,099 --> 01:32:02,351
Doug.
1846
01:32:02,517 --> 01:32:04,144
ANDERS: ...over and over again
1847
01:32:04,310 --> 01:32:08,531
until they cart
every fucking last one of us
1848
01:32:08,690 --> 01:32:10,363
off the fucking ice!
1849
01:32:10,525 --> 01:32:11,651
- Doug!
- Dougie!
1850
01:32:16,489 --> 01:32:18,036
(BONES CRACK)
1851
01:32:21,619 --> 01:32:23,872
(DISTORTED GROANING)
1852
01:32:25,498 --> 01:32:27,341
- (BONES CRUNCH)
- (GROANS)
1853
01:32:33,006 --> 01:32:35,634
(GROANS)
1854
01:32:35,800 --> 01:32:38,599
Jesus, Dougie. Are you OK?
1855
01:32:38,762 --> 01:32:41,936
Not really,
but thanks for askin'.
1856
01:32:46,227 --> 01:32:49,322
Right there. Right there.
1857
01:32:49,481 --> 01:32:52,485
(HIGH-PITCHED WHINE ECHOES)
1858
01:32:59,532 --> 01:33:02,411
Anders, can you hear me?
Hey, hey.
1859
01:33:02,577 --> 01:33:04,796
- (COUGHS, GASPS)
- It's OK.
1860
01:33:06,539 --> 01:33:08,416
I fucking...
1861
01:33:09,626 --> 01:33:12,470
...hate this sport.
1862
01:33:12,629 --> 01:33:15,382
- (WHEEZES)
- Oh, righto.
1863
01:33:16,966 --> 01:33:19,890
(LAUGHS)
1864
01:33:21,638 --> 01:33:23,390
One, two, three.
1865
01:33:23,556 --> 01:33:26,105
- (BONES CRACK)
- (CRIES OUT)
1866
01:33:26,267 --> 01:33:29,111
- Don't hate me, here.
- I don't hate you, Parky.
1867
01:33:29,270 --> 01:33:31,989
- I could never hate you.
- (SPECTATORS CHEER)
1868
01:33:32,148 --> 01:33:35,823
(SPECTATORS CHANT) Highlanders!
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1869
01:33:35,985 --> 01:33:39,114
RED: There's only seconds left
and nothing is settled.
1870
01:33:39,280 --> 01:33:40,907
As LaFlamme moves through
the neutral zone,
1871
01:33:41,074 --> 01:33:42,451
gets in across the line,
1872
01:33:42,617 --> 01:33:44,164
he's got Stevenson
on his flank.
1873
01:33:44,327 --> 01:33:47,206
(HEROIC MUSIC)
1874
01:33:48,289 --> 01:33:51,042
(SPECTATORS CHANT)
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1875
01:33:51,209 --> 01:33:54,554
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1876
01:33:54,712 --> 01:33:57,511
LaFlamme's now
moving in toward Totan.
1877
01:34:00,009 --> 01:34:01,556
Five seconds left.
1878
01:34:04,806 --> 01:34:06,774
Stevenson is there...
1879
01:34:09,686 --> 01:34:12,280
- (DISTORTED GROAN)
- LaFlamme moving in...
1880
01:34:18,319 --> 01:34:22,620
STEVENSON: Excalibur!
1881
01:34:23,700 --> 01:34:25,122
(WARPING LOW TONES)
1882
01:34:25,285 --> 01:34:26,662
(SPECTATORS CHEER)
1883
01:34:26,828 --> 01:34:31,129
Stevenson scores! They did it!
The Highlanders win!
1884
01:34:31,291 --> 01:34:32,713
The Highlanders win!
1885
01:34:32,876 --> 01:34:35,880
For just the second time
in 10 years,
1886
01:34:36,045 --> 01:34:39,174
the Halifax Highlanders
are going to the play-offs!
1887
01:34:39,340 --> 01:34:42,184
('ACT 3, SCENE 2'
FROM 'TURANDOT' BY PUCCINI)
1888
01:34:44,429 --> 01:34:46,932
(ALL CHEER)
1889
01:34:54,272 --> 01:34:55,819
'Bye, guys.
1890
01:34:58,276 --> 01:35:02,452
(TRIUMPHANT OPERATIC
CRESCENDO)
1891
01:35:19,380 --> 01:35:22,304
('YOU HELD THE WORLD
IN YOUR ARMS' BY IDLEWILD)
1892
01:35:32,602 --> 01:35:34,229
♪ Every face... ♪
1893
01:35:34,395 --> 01:35:37,444
(CLEARS THROAT)
That's when the hand jobs start.
1894
01:35:37,607 --> 01:35:39,280
Oh, no, I was wrong.
1895
01:35:39,442 --> 01:35:42,571
They're starting early today.
No lube or nothin'.
1896
01:35:42,737 --> 01:35:46,787
DOUG: Give it to him, Johnny!
Masturbate that penis!
1897
01:35:46,950 --> 01:35:48,167
(ALL LAUGH)
1898
01:35:48,326 --> 01:35:50,454
This is the weirdest
fucking job ever.
1899
01:35:51,829 --> 01:35:54,628
- (ALL GROAN)
- Sorry about that.
1900
01:35:54,791 --> 01:35:57,761
- It had to happen once.
- You good?
1901
01:35:57,919 --> 01:35:59,546
Wow, it smells like dick.
1902
01:35:59,712 --> 01:36:01,840
Oh, God,
it smells so much like piss.
1903
01:36:02,006 --> 01:36:04,304
- (ALL LAUGH)
- I had no response to that.
1904
01:36:04,467 --> 01:36:06,265
Well, if you give me
enough booze,
1905
01:36:06,427 --> 01:36:08,020
I'll munch a box or two.
1906
01:36:08,179 --> 01:36:11,558
- I mean...
- (ALL LAUGH)
1907
01:36:11,724 --> 01:36:15,149
- (LAUGHS) Oh, my God.
- Only two?
1908
01:36:15,311 --> 01:36:17,188
A couple. (LAUGHS)
1909
01:36:17,355 --> 01:36:19,608
- Let's try that one more time.
- What is the line?
1910
01:36:19,774 --> 01:36:21,993
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1911
01:36:22,151 --> 01:36:23,698
- Highland...
- (LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY)
1912
01:36:23,861 --> 01:36:25,238
Alright, shut the fuck up.
1913
01:36:25,405 --> 01:36:26,907
(ALL LAUGH)
1914
01:36:27,073 --> 01:36:28,575
What did you do, man?
1915
01:36:28,741 --> 01:36:30,960
You had a jack-off selfie
on my grandmother's grave,
1916
01:36:31,119 --> 01:36:35,340
you fuckin' inbred Slavic
fuckin' potato vampire!
1917
01:36:35,498 --> 01:36:37,751
I'm telling you, man,
knowing you and playing with you
1918
01:36:37,917 --> 01:36:41,171
is like being force-fed
fucking junkie piss!
1919
01:36:41,337 --> 01:36:42,714
And you two!
1920
01:36:42,880 --> 01:36:45,224
You're like fucking
Mother Russia's herpes, man!
1921
01:36:45,383 --> 01:36:46,851
The bitch shipped them to Canada
1922
01:36:47,010 --> 01:36:48,478
and fuckin' made me
deal with 'em!
1923
01:36:48,636 --> 01:36:51,105
- Belchy!
- (SLATE CLACKS)
1924
01:36:51,264 --> 01:36:52,891
He gets it! I love candy!
1925
01:36:53,057 --> 01:36:56,106
What? Yeah, I'll take a fucking candy!
I love fucking candy!
1926
01:36:56,269 --> 01:37:01,526
He fucking gets it! Fuck!
No! No more fucking candies!
1927
01:37:01,691 --> 01:37:04,069
Sports Desk - we've got slogans.
1928
01:37:04,235 --> 01:37:07,785
Sports Desk -
our slogan IS a slogan.
1929
01:37:07,947 --> 01:37:09,324
You're watching Sports Desk.
1930
01:37:09,490 --> 01:37:11,367
Sports Desk -
we're all pink on the inside.
1931
01:37:11,534 --> 01:37:13,957
(ALL LAUGH)
1932
01:37:14,120 --> 01:37:15,997
(BOTH SHOUT OVER EACH OTHER)
1933
01:37:16,164 --> 01:37:18,758
- Ow! Ugh!
- Ow! Fuck! Ow!
1934
01:37:20,710 --> 01:37:22,678
I'm sorry, dude.
That was really awkward.
1935
01:37:22,837 --> 01:37:25,181
(ALL LAUGH)
1936
01:37:31,596 --> 01:37:33,223
What the fuck
are you wearing, dude?
1937
01:37:33,389 --> 01:37:35,266
It's supposed to
make me look big.
1938
01:37:35,433 --> 01:37:37,902
Why do you shop in
little girl section?
1939
01:37:38,061 --> 01:37:40,155
(ALL LAUGH)
1940
01:37:40,313 --> 01:37:43,237
You honestly look like
you're on the fuckin' autobahn
1941
01:37:43,399 --> 01:37:44,821
straight to Gay Town, man.
1942
01:37:44,984 --> 01:37:47,783
On the blonde bus
to Anal Town, hm?
1943
01:37:48,988 --> 01:37:52,413
You look like
a little Nazi weightlifter.
1944
01:37:52,575 --> 01:37:54,873
(ALL LAUGH)
1945
01:37:55,036 --> 01:37:57,664
Power-lifting fucking dongs,
man.
1946
01:37:57,830 --> 01:38:01,926
- Like...
- (ALL LAUGH)
1947
01:38:02,085 --> 01:38:05,180
BOB: I guess they like him
'cause he's got smaller hands.
1948
01:38:05,338 --> 01:38:06,715
- Who wouldn't?
- You know?
1949
01:38:06,881 --> 01:38:08,724
Feels like a female's hands,
1950
01:38:08,883 --> 01:38:12,057
but make no mistake,
that is a man.
1951
01:38:12,220 --> 01:38:14,268
(ALL LAUGH)
1952
01:38:14,430 --> 01:38:17,354
I'm not stooping
to your fuckin' level.
1953
01:38:17,517 --> 01:38:19,519
- The mayonnaise is semen.
- (SPITS) What?
1954
01:38:19,685 --> 01:38:23,940
- Enjoy the cannoli.
- This is so disrespectful, man.
1955
01:38:24,107 --> 01:38:27,281
And it better not have come out
of that fuckin' sturgeon.
1956
01:38:27,443 --> 01:38:30,162
(ALL LAUGH)
1957
01:38:33,658 --> 01:38:37,629
Always driving away
the ones you love.
1958
01:38:37,787 --> 01:38:42,213
(ALL LAUGH)
1959
01:38:45,002 --> 01:38:47,130
JAY: I love this movie!
1960
01:38:50,758 --> 01:38:53,887
(ORCHESTRAL ARRANGEMENT
OF 'SCOTLAND THE BRAVE')
1961
01:40:48,626 --> 01:40:50,754
Hockey history
is full of star players
1962
01:40:50,920 --> 01:40:52,297
and its backup enforcers.
1963
01:40:52,463 --> 01:40:53,885
- You know, you got Gretzky...
- Mm.
1964
01:40:54,048 --> 01:40:54,924
...and McSorley.
1965
01:40:55,091 --> 01:40:57,059
Well, I don't know if
I'm a Gretzky.
1966
01:40:57,218 --> 01:40:58,595
- Doug...
- Thank you.
1967
01:40:58,761 --> 01:41:00,684
He took our fucking microphone.
148518
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