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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,786 --> 00:00:02,787 ♪ BA, DA, BA, BA, DA, BA, ♪ 2 00:00:02,787 --> 00:00:04,166 BA, DA, BA, BA, DA, BA, ♪ 3 00:00:04,166 --> 00:00:08,152 ♪ JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE 4 00:00:08,152 --> 00:00:09,891 THIS IS RIDICULOUS. 5 00:00:09,891 --> 00:00:13,800 >> Jimmy: HELLO, AND WELCOME. MY NAME IS JIMMY KIMMEL. 6 00:00:13,800 --> 00:00:17,203 I HOST A TALK SHOW IN MY KITCHEN. WHICH WAS PREVIOUSLY SOMETHING 7 00:00:17,203 --> 00:00:22,041 YOU MIGHT HEAR FROM SOMEONE WITH PARANOIA AND DELUSIONS. 8 00:00:22,041 --> 00:00:29,783 SO, MAYBE I'M NOT HOSTING A SHOW. MAYBE I'M CRAZY! 9 00:00:29,783 --> 00:00:32,085 SPEAKING OF CRAZY, WE HAVE A BIGLY MILESTONE ON THE 10 00:00:32,085 --> 00:00:34,120 WAY. THIS WEEKEND, DONALD TRUMP CELEBRATES HIS BIRTHDAY, 11 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:35,455 NUMBER 74! SO BREAK OUT THE KETCHUP AND 12 00:00:35,455 --> 00:00:39,292 CAKE. DONALD TRUMP WAS BORN ON 13 00:00:39,292 --> 00:00:44,531 JUNE 14th, 1946, WHEN A PILE OF SOGGY CHEESE FRIES WAS STRUCK BY 14 00:00:44,531 --> 00:00:47,233 A BOLT OF ORANGE LIGHTNING. TRUMP SUPPORTERS IN FLORIDA, 15 00:00:47,233 --> 00:00:51,938 MICHIGAN AND ARKANSAS ARE HOLDING EVENTS TO CELEBRATE. 16 00:00:51,938 --> 00:00:55,275 AND WHAT BETTER WAY TO HONOR THE PRESIDENT THAN BY GATHERING, TO 17 00:00:55,275 --> 00:00:58,344 CONTRACT THE VERY VIRUS WHOSE EXISTENCE HE DENIES? 18 00:00:58,344 --> 00:01:00,113 BY THE WAY, HERE'S ONE OF DONALD TRUMP'S OLD BIRTHDAY 19 00:01:00,113 --> 00:01:05,218 INVITATIONS FROM A PARTY HE HAD IN 1994. 20 00:01:05,218 --> 00:01:08,822 THE THEME WAS "TRUMP: LORD OF THE FINANCIAL JUNGLE." 21 00:01:08,822 --> 00:01:13,827 THAT'S HIM AND MARLA MAPLES IN JUNGLE GARB. 22 00:01:13,827 --> 00:01:16,362 THIS CARD IS AMAZING FOR SO MANY REASONS. 23 00:01:16,362 --> 00:01:19,265 THIS WAS 26 YEARS AGO AND NOTHING DEPICTED IN IT NOW 24 00:01:19,265 --> 00:01:22,435 EXISTS. THAT BODY IS FAKE, THE CASINO 25 00:01:22,435 --> 00:01:24,404 WENT BANKRUPT, THE MARRIAGE ENDED, THAT HAIR IS GONE. 26 00:01:24,404 --> 00:01:28,174 EVEN THE ELEPHANT IN THE BACKGROUND WAS SHOT AND KILLED 27 00:01:28,174 --> 00:01:29,175 BY DONALD JR. THE PRESIDENT HAD A BUSY DAY OF 28 00:01:29,175 --> 00:01:34,547 TRAVEL TODAY, BUT HE DID FIND TIME TO TWEET. A LOT. 29 00:01:34,547 --> 00:01:36,382 LAST NIGHT, HE WROTE ABOUT OCCUPY PROTESTS IN WASHINGTON 30 00:01:36,382 --> 00:01:40,920 STATE. 31 00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:45,492 HE MUST ARE HAVE BEEN WATCHING TV AND TWEETED 32 00:01:45,492 --> 00:01:46,559 "RADICAL LEFT GOVERNOR @JAYINSLEE AND THE MAYOR OF 33 00:01:46,559 --> 00:01:47,794 SEATTLE ARE BEING TAUNTED AND PLAYED AT A LEVEL THAT OUR GREAT 34 00:01:47,794 --> 00:01:51,030 COUNTRY HAS NEVER SEEN BEFORE. TAKE BACK YOUR CITY NOW. 35 00:01:51,030 --> 00:01:52,999 IF YOU DON'T DO IT, I WILL. THIS IS NOT A GAME. 36 00:01:52,999 --> 00:01:59,272 THESE UGLY ANARCHISTS MUST BE STOOPED IMMEDIATELY. MOVE FAST!" 37 00:01:59,272 --> 00:02:02,942 THEY MUST BE STOOPED! THE MAYOR OF SEATTLE TWEETED IN 38 00:02:02,942 --> 00:02:04,878 RESPONSE "GO BACK TO YOUR BUNKER." 39 00:02:04,878 --> 00:02:08,481 OH, THAT BUNKER THING MUST BE DRIVING HIM NUTS. 40 00:02:08,481 --> 00:02:12,352 WHY HE GETS INVOLVED IN THIS SORT OF THING, I HAVE NO IDEA. 41 00:02:12,352 --> 00:02:16,356 BUT HE IS CLEARLY SURROUNDED BY 42 00:02:16,356 --> 00:02:23,229 PEOPLE WHO ARE "STOOPED." THE AWARD FOR MOST STOOPED THIS 43 00:02:23,229 --> 00:02:25,632 WEEK GOES TO TRUMP'S CHIEF ECONOMIC ADVISOR, 44 00:02:25,632 --> 00:02:28,501 LARRY KUDLOW, WHO ASTONISHED EVEN THE MOST HARDENED AMONG US 45 00:02:28,501 --> 00:02:29,168 BY SAYING THIS. 46 00:02:29,168 --> 00:02:31,738 >> YOU SAID YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN SYSTEMIC RACISM? 47 00:02:31,738 --> 00:02:32,772 >> I DO NOT. 48 00:02:32,772 --> 00:02:33,840 >> AT ALL IN THE U. S.? 49 00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:38,278 >> I DO NOT. 50 00:02:38,278 --> 00:02:42,048 >> SYSTEM IC RACISM AGAINST AFRICAN‐AMERICANS IN THE UNITED 51 00:02:42,048 --> 00:02:43,983 STATES? 52 00:02:43,983 --> 00:02:45,518 >> I'LL SAY IT AGAIN, I DO NOT. 53 00:02:45,518 --> 00:02:46,519 >> Jimmy: "SIR, ONE MORE QUESTION. 54 00:02:46,519 --> 00:02:48,388 CAN YOU NAME A BLACK PERSON? JUST ONE. GO AHEAD." 55 00:02:48,388 --> 00:02:50,256 I MEAN, THAT'S SO STUPID I DON'T THINK EVEN DONALD TRUMP WOULD 56 00:02:50,256 --> 00:02:51,791 SAY IT! THIS, BY THE WAY, IS THE SAME 57 00:02:51,791 --> 00:02:53,226 GUY WHO SAID CORONAVIRUS WAS CONTAINED THREE MONTHS AGO AND 58 00:02:53,226 --> 00:02:58,765 HE'S STILL THERE. STILL REPORTING FOR DUTY. 59 00:02:58,765 --> 00:02:59,866 ONLY THE BEST PEOPLE. ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE COIN, 60 00:02:59,866 --> 00:03:03,269 THE SIDE LINCOLN IS ON, NASCAR YESTERDAY ANNOUNCED THAT THEY 61 00:03:03,269 --> 00:03:05,305 WILL NO LONGER ALLOW CONFEDERATE FLAGS AT THEIR RACE EVENTS. 62 00:03:05,305 --> 00:03:10,443 THEY PUT OUT A STATEMENT SAYING THE FLAG RUNS CONTRARY TO 63 00:03:10,443 --> 00:03:12,412 PROVIDING A WELCOMING AND INCLUSIVE ENVIRONMENT FOR FANS, 64 00:03:12,412 --> 00:03:18,451 AND A LOT OF FANS DIDN'T LIKE THAT. LOTS OF TWEETS. 65 00:03:18,451 --> 00:03:19,586 "YOU PICKED THE LOSING SIDE OF THIS BATTLE. 66 00:03:19,586 --> 00:03:21,921 GOOD LUCK WITH THAT." I DON'T KNOW. 67 00:03:21,921 --> 00:03:24,357 PRETTY SURE THE CONFEDERACY WAS THE LOSING SIDE OF THE BATTLE. 68 00:03:24,357 --> 00:03:28,728 "PRETTY SOON WE WILL HAVE RADIOS IN THE CAR PLAYING RAP MUSIC." 69 00:03:28,728 --> 00:03:32,765 OH, HEAVENS NO. NOT "RAP MUSIC!" "BUT I BET PEOPLE CAN FLY THEIR 70 00:03:32,765 --> 00:03:36,102 RAINBOW FLAGS ALL DAY." RIGHT. FROM NOW ON, NASCAR IS GONNA BE 71 00:03:36,102 --> 00:03:39,939 ONE BIG GAY PARADE. "BYE BYE NASCAR. 72 00:03:39,939 --> 00:03:41,441 I HAVE BEEN A FAN FOR 50 PLUS YEARS. 73 00:03:41,441 --> 00:03:44,410 STAY OUT OF POLITICS AND SOCIAL ISSUES. JUST RACE!" 74 00:03:44,410 --> 00:03:50,016 ACTUALLY, RACE IS EXACTLY WHAT THIS IS ABOUT. 75 00:03:50,016 --> 00:03:51,584 AND, "WELP JUST ANOTHER SPORT I WON'T WATCH. 76 00:03:51,584 --> 00:03:55,521 GONNA HAVE A LOT OF TIME TRAVELING THIS BEAUTIFUL 77 00:03:55,521 --> 00:03:58,658 COUNTRY, FISHING AND SPENDING TIME WITH MY GRANDCHILDREN." 78 00:03:58,658 --> 00:04:01,861 I HAVE BAD NEWS FOR YOUR PAL. IN TEN YEARS, YOUR GRANDCHILDREN 79 00:04:01,861 --> 00:04:05,365 WILL BE DESCRIBING YOU AS "MY RACIST GRANDPA." 80 00:04:05,365 --> 00:04:08,401 SO NASCAR NOW HAS DONE MORE TO FIGHT RACISM THAN THE WHITE 81 00:04:08,401 --> 00:04:11,371 HOUSE. BUT THE PRESIDENT IS GETTING 82 00:04:11,371 --> 00:04:13,673 BACK OUT THERE. TONIGHT HE PRESSED THE FLESH AT 83 00:04:13,673 --> 00:04:16,876 A FUNDRAISER IN DALLAS. NO MASKS, OF COURSE. THAT'S NUTS. 84 00:04:16,876 --> 00:04:20,380 HAVING PARTIES, SHAKING HANDS. DALLAS ISN'T EVEN A SAFE PLACE 85 00:04:20,380 --> 00:04:27,153 FOR PRESIDENTS WHEN THERE ISN'T A VIRUS. 86 00:04:27,153 --> 00:04:28,388 AND HE IS WEEK‐ENDING AT HIS GOLF CLUB IN NEW JERSEY. 87 00:04:28,388 --> 00:04:32,058 SEE THAT? HE'S FIGHTING THE PANDEMIC AND 88 00:04:32,058 --> 00:04:34,394 RACISM AT THE SAME TIME, BY NOT WEARING A MASK TO HIS VERY WHITE 89 00:04:34,394 --> 00:04:36,362 GOLF CLUB. THE PRESIDENT IS PLANNING TO HIT 90 00:04:36,362 --> 00:04:39,766 THE ROAD WITH A SERIES OF CAMPAIGN RALLIES, STARTING IN 91 00:04:39,766 --> 00:04:41,334 TULSA NEXT WEEK. BIG CROWDS ARE EXPECTED. 92 00:04:41,334 --> 00:04:46,739 AND EVEN WELCOMED. BUT ANYONE WHO GETS A TICKET HAS 93 00:04:46,739 --> 00:04:49,342 TO AGREE IN WRITING NOT TO SUE TRUMP IF THEY GET SICK. FOR REAL. 94 00:04:49,342 --> 00:04:53,012 YOU HAVE TO CLICK THIS LIABILITY RELEASE TO REGISTER. 95 00:04:53,012 --> 00:04:56,382 IT'S LIKE BEING PREGNANT ON A ROLLERCOASTER. 96 00:04:56,382 --> 00:04:59,318 BUT GO AHEAD AND TAKE A BIG SWIG OF BLEACH BEFORE YOU COME 97 00:04:59,318 --> 00:05:02,288 ANYWAY. I GUESS THE PLAN IS TO JUST 98 00:05:02,288 --> 00:05:04,657 IGNORE THE VIRUS NOW AND HOPE IT GOES AWAY. BECAUSE YESTERDAY, 99 00:05:04,657 --> 00:05:08,361 REPUBLICANS ANNOUNCED THEY ARE LIKELY TO MOVE THEIR CONVENTION 100 00:05:08,361 --> 00:05:11,297 TO JACKSONVILLE, BECAUSE NORTH CAROLINA, WHERE IT WAS SUPPOSED 101 00:05:11,297 --> 00:05:14,333 TO TAKE PLACE, ISN'T CRAY‐CRAY ENOUGH FOR THEIR CURRENT LEVEL 102 00:05:14,333 --> 00:05:16,402 OF CRAY. THEY ARE NOT INTERESTED IN 103 00:05:16,402 --> 00:05:20,506 SAFETY. WHAT THEY'RE PROMISING IS THAT 104 00:05:20,506 --> 00:05:25,278 THIS WILL BE A BLOWOUT BASH! 105 00:05:25,278 --> 00:05:30,850 >> WANT TO KEEP AMERICA GREAT? JOIN US IN JACKSONVILLE, FOR THE 106 00:05:30,850 --> 00:05:33,553 2020 REPUBLICAN NATIONAL CONVENTION, WITH ALL YOUR 107 00:05:33,553 --> 00:05:36,656 FAVORITE STARS AND, NO SOCIAL DISTANCING! 108 00:05:36,656 --> 00:05:41,194 MONDAY, AUGUST 24th, WE'RE PACKING IN MORE MOUTH‐BREATHING 109 00:05:41,194 --> 00:05:45,631 DEPLORABLES THAN EVER BEFORE, AND WE'RE TURNING OFF THE 110 00:05:45,631 --> 00:05:45,932 VENTILATION! 111 00:05:45,932 --> 00:05:56,476 HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, LIB‐TARDS? 112 00:05:56,476 --> 00:06:00,713 HUNGRY? NO NAPKINS, NO SNEEZE GUARDS, NO 113 00:06:00,713 --> 00:06:07,620 UTENSILS ALLOWED. GRAB UP SHRIMP AND SAY FORK YOU! 114 00:06:07,620 --> 00:06:09,822 THE EXCITEMENT IS CONTAGIOUS. 115 00:06:09,822 --> 00:06:15,027 >> MUST BE 14. NO SHIRT, NO SHOES, NO PROBLEM. 116 00:06:15,027 --> 00:06:19,232 NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT HAPPENS TWO WEEKS LATER. 117 00:06:19,232 --> 00:06:21,868 >> Jimmy: FLORIDA, STILL THE NUMBER ONE PLACE TO DIE. 118 00:06:21,868 --> 00:06:22,969 BUT FLORIDA ISN'T ALONE. WE ARE OPENING THINGS UP, FOR 119 00:06:22,969 --> 00:06:24,403 BETTER OR WORSE, HERE IN 120 00:06:24,403 --> 00:06:30,977 CALIFORNIA TOO. 121 00:06:30,977 --> 00:06:34,647 IN NEW YORK, THEY PUT OUT A SAFER SEX FACT SHEET. 122 00:06:34,647 --> 00:06:37,717 THIS IS REAL. THIS IS FROM THE CITY OF NEW 123 00:06:37,717 --> 00:06:40,353 YORK. THEY RECOMMEND THAT DURING INTERCOURSE YOU SHOULD WEAR A 124 00:06:40,353 --> 00:06:44,924 FACE COVERING OR MASK. OKAY. FUN. THEY SUGGEST THAT YOU MASTER 125 00:06:44,924 --> 00:06:47,760 BAIT TOGETHER. YOU KNOW, YOU'VE TRIED THAT. 126 00:06:47,760 --> 00:06:50,663 IT'S NOT THE SAME SINCE THEY CLOSED THE MOVIE THEATERS. 127 00:06:50,663 --> 00:06:54,267 THEY TELL YOU TO BE CREATIVE WITH SEXUAL POSITIONS AND 128 00:06:54,267 --> 00:06:58,738 PHYSICAL BARRIERS, LIKE WALLS THAT ALLOW SEXUAL CONTACT WHILE 129 00:06:58,738 --> 00:07:01,240 PREVENTING CLOSE FACE‐TO‐FACE CONTACT. 130 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:05,444 IN OTHER WORDS, GLORY HOLES. NEW YORK CITY IS RECOMMENDING 131 00:07:05,444 --> 00:07:08,414 GLORY HOLES. THEY TELL YOU TO SKIP SEX IF YOU 132 00:07:08,414 --> 00:07:10,783 OR YOUR PARTNER AREN'T FEELING WELL. 133 00:07:10,783 --> 00:07:13,786 MOST WIVES HAVE THAT ONE COVERED AND THAT MEDICAL CONDITIONS THAT 134 00:07:13,786 --> 00:07:17,924 COULD PUT YOU AT RISK DURING SEX INCLUDE LUNG DISEASE, HEART 135 00:07:17,924 --> 00:07:22,028 DISEASE, DIABETES, OBESITY. SO GOOD NEWS FOR MELANIA WITH 136 00:07:22,028 --> 00:07:26,265 THAT ONE I GUESS. THEY EVEN PROVIDED TIPS FOR 137 00:07:26,265 --> 00:07:28,768 GROUP SEX. LARGE GATHERINGS OF ANY TYPE ARE 138 00:07:28,768 --> 00:07:33,573 NOT SAFE DURING COVID‐19. BUT IF YOU DECIDE TO FIND A 139 00:07:33,573 --> 00:07:39,679 CROWD, BELOW ARE TIPS TO REDUCE YOUR RISK OF SPREADING OR 140 00:07:39,679 --> 00:07:46,319 GETTING COVID‐19. LIMIT YUTHE SIZE OF YOUR GUEST 141 00:07:46,319 --> 00:07:49,188 LIST. PICK LARGER, MORE OPEN, AND WELL 142 00:07:49,188 --> 00:07:52,758 VENTILATED SPACE. BRING AN ALCOHOL‐BASED HAND 143 00:07:52,758 --> 00:07:56,128 SANITIZER. CAN YOU IMAGINE ROLLING INTO AN 144 00:07:56,128 --> 00:07:59,098 ORGY WITH A PUMP BOTTLE OF PURELL? 145 00:07:59,098 --> 00:08:03,669 EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO WEAR THESE ANDREW CUOMO 146 00:08:03,669 --> 00:08:06,239 UNDERPANTS, WHICH ARE AVAILABLE NOW ON ETSY. 147 00:08:06,239 --> 00:08:11,043 WE HAVE OUR OWN EXPERT ON THE SHOW ON SEX AND EVERYTHING ELSE. 148 00:08:11,043 --> 00:08:15,381 FROM HER HOME IN LOS ANGELES IT'S TIME FOR A QUARANTINE 149 00:08:15,381 --> 00:08:17,116 EDITION OF DEAR AUNT CHIPPY. 150 00:08:17,116 --> 00:08:22,388 >> OKAY. HERE WE ARE. NOW THAT MY UPSTAIRS NEIGHBORS 151 00:08:22,388 --> 00:08:29,629 ARE HOME ALL DAY, ALL THEY DO IS HAVE SEX. 152 00:08:29,629 --> 00:08:34,267 WHAT'S SOMETHING SUM IMPLE I CO YELL AT THEM TO MAKE THEM STOP? 153 00:08:34,267 --> 00:08:37,203 FIRE! JUST YELL FIRE! I'M SURE THEY WILL STOP HAVING 154 00:08:37,203 --> 00:08:44,610 SEX IF THEY HEAR "FIRE." WHAT A MORON. AH. 155 00:08:44,610 --> 00:08:47,380 >> Jimmy: WELL, THANKS, AUNT CHIPPY. 156 00:08:47,380 --> 00:08:51,651 WE HAVE MUSIC FROM THE CLARK SISTERS, AND WE'LL BE BACK WITH 157 00:08:51,651 --> 00:08:51,918 KEKE PALMER. 158 00:09:01,535 --> 00:09:03,828 >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK TO "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE" FROM MY HOUSE. 159 00:09:03,828 --> 00:09:06,664 LATER ON THE SHOW WE HAVE SOMETHING VERY SPECIAL. 160 00:09:06,664 --> 00:09:09,834 THEY HAVE THREE GRAMMYS, AND A MOVIE ON LIFETIME CALLED "THE 161 00:09:09,834 --> 00:09:14,672 CLARK SISTERS: FIRST LADIES OF GOSPEL." 162 00:09:14,672 --> 00:09:19,811 THE LEGENDARY CLARK SISTERS WILL TALK US TO CHURCH ON A THURSDAY 163 00:09:19,811 --> 00:09:21,279 NIGHT. NEXT WEEK, JOIN US WITH MARK RUFFALO, SARAH PAULSON, 164 00:09:21,279 --> 00:09:22,713 BILL BURR, THE ROASTMASTER GENERAL JEFF ROSS AND 165 00:09:22,713 --> 00:09:25,316 AMY SCHUMER TOO. OUR GUEST TONIGHT IS AN ACTRESS, 166 00:09:25,316 --> 00:09:27,385 ACTIVIST, RECORDING ARTIST AND TALK SHOW HOST. 167 00:09:27,385 --> 00:09:31,189 SHE IS ALSO THE STAR OF AN INSPIRING VIRAL VIDEO, PLEASE 168 00:09:31,189 --> 00:09:36,627 WELCOME KEKE PALMER. HI, KEKE. 169 00:09:36,627 --> 00:09:39,797 >> HOW ARE YOU? IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU, MAN, IN 170 00:09:39,797 --> 00:09:43,201 THIS NEW SURROUNDING. JOIN IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU, TOO. 171 00:09:43,201 --> 00:09:45,403 I LIKE THAT PAINTING YOU HAVE ON THE WALL. 172 00:09:45,403 --> 00:09:47,772 >> I LIKE THOSE LOGS IN THE BACK. 173 00:09:47,772 --> 00:09:50,308 JOIN THANKS, EVERYBODY LOVES MY LOGS. 174 00:09:50,308 --> 00:09:55,646 I THINK OF YOU AS A VERY UPBEAT PERSON, AND I THINK EVERY KEKE 175 00:09:55,646 --> 00:09:57,982 HAS TO BE AN UPBEAT PERSON. IT JUST GOES WITH THE NAME. 176 00:09:57,982 --> 00:10:01,385 ARE YOU FEELING UPBEAT? 177 00:10:01,385 --> 00:10:04,622 >> UM, I THINK, I DO FEEL UPBEAT. 178 00:10:04,622 --> 00:10:10,661 I'M A POSITIVE PERSON BY NATURE, BUT I DO THINK MY EMPATHIC SIDE 179 00:10:10,661 --> 00:10:14,532 IS BEING WEIGHED DOWN BY WHAT'S GOING ON RIGHT NOW. 180 00:10:14,532 --> 00:10:18,569 >> Jimmy: THIS VIDEO I REFERENCED HAS 25 MILLION VIEWS. 181 00:10:18,569 --> 00:10:21,873 BEFORE WE SHOW IT, I WANT TO ASK, HAVE YOU BEEN TO A PROTEST 182 00:10:21,873 --> 00:10:24,475 OF ANY KIND BEFORE? 183 00:10:24,475 --> 00:10:25,409 >> UM, YES. I MEAN, I WENT TO THE PROTESTS 184 00:10:25,409 --> 00:10:28,846 IN FERGUSON FOR MIKE BROWN. YOU'VE BEEN TO MANY DIFFERENT 185 00:10:28,846 --> 00:10:33,718 PROTESTS, BUT NOT ONE LOOK THIS IN A TOMB LUKE, I MEAN, LIKE 186 00:10:33,718 --> 00:10:35,586 THIS. I THINK ESPECIALLY WITH ALL THE 187 00:10:35,586 --> 00:10:39,023 STUFF THAT WAS HAPPENING WITH QUARANTINE, SO KIND OF JUST 188 00:10:39,023 --> 00:10:41,993 BEING AROUND THAT MANY PEOPLE AT ONCE WAS, IT WAS A LOT. 189 00:10:41,993 --> 00:10:44,795 IT WAS DIFFERENT. IT WAS A DIFFERENT ENERGY, I 190 00:10:44,795 --> 00:10:48,332 THINK, BECAUSE NONE OF US HAD BEEN ANYWHERE IN A WHILE. 191 00:10:48,332 --> 00:10:50,801 >> Jimmy: WERE YOU THINKING ABOUT WHAT YOU MIGHT SAY IF YOU 192 00:10:50,801 --> 00:10:54,005 WERE CONFRONTED WITH, IN THIS CASE, NATIONAL GUARD? 193 00:10:54,005 --> 00:10:57,975 HAD YOU THOUGHT ABOUT THAT BEFORE YOU SAID WHAT YOU SAID? 194 00:10:57,975 --> 00:11:02,647 >> NO. I DIDN'T PLAN ON REALLY SEEING 195 00:11:02,647 --> 00:11:04,181 NUB ANYBODY OUT THERE LIKE THAT OUT 196 00:11:04,181 --> 00:11:07,285 THERE. WE WERE JUST MARCHING, WALKING, 197 00:11:07,285 --> 00:11:11,656 I HADN'T BEEN AROUND MUCH PEOPLE IN A WHILE, SO I REALLY, REALLY 198 00:11:11,656 --> 00:11:14,191 WANTED TO BE OUT THERE AND PROTEST FOR THIS CAUSE. 199 00:11:14,191 --> 00:11:17,795 AND THEN I SAW, THOUGH, THE NATIONAL GUARDSMEN, AND THEY 200 00:11:17,795 --> 00:11:21,399 WERE LIKE BLOCKING US FROM GOING FURTHER WITH THE PEACEFUL 201 00:11:21,399 --> 00:11:23,200 PROTEST. AND I THINK IN THAT MOMENT I WAS 202 00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:26,671 JUST KIND OF, I WAS WEIRDED OUT A BIT AND KIND OF CONFUSED I 203 00:11:26,671 --> 00:11:30,708 THINK FROM A GENUINE, NAÏVE PLACE OF BEING CONFUSED AS TO 204 00:11:30,708 --> 00:11:33,811 WHY THERE'S THIS SEPARATION BETWEEN US, LIKE THEY'RE HUMAN 205 00:11:33,811 --> 00:11:36,180 LIKE I'M HUMAN. I KNOW THEY HAVE A JOB TO DO, 206 00:11:36,180 --> 00:11:39,951 BUT I DON'T KNOW, I FELT LIKE, WHY CAN'T THEY BE WITH US, 207 00:11:39,951 --> 00:11:45,923 MARCHING WITH US. ESPECIALLY NOW, I FOEEL LIKE EVN 208 00:11:45,923 --> 00:11:49,527 WITH WHAT HAPPENED WITH GENERAL MILLEY, THERE'S A DIVISION FROM 209 00:11:49,527 --> 00:11:52,630 EVERY ANGLE, WHETHER YOU'RE IN THE MILITARY, BLACK, WHITE, 210 00:11:52,630 --> 00:11:54,131 WHATEVER. WE ALL NEED TO COME TOGETHER, 211 00:11:54,131 --> 00:11:57,969 AND I THINK I JUST WAS REALLY OVERWHELMED, AND I DIDN'T KNOW 212 00:11:57,969 --> 00:12:01,272 REALLY WHAT I WAS SAYING. I WAS JUST REALLY SPEAKING FROM 213 00:12:01,272 --> 00:12:04,942 MY HEART AND HOW I WAS FEELING, AND, YOU KNOW, THAT WAS THAT. 214 00:12:04,942 --> 00:12:07,445 >> Jimmy: LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT HAPPENED THERE. 215 00:12:07,445 --> 00:12:09,280 >> YOU HAVE PEOPLE IN HERE THAT NEED YOUR HELP. 216 00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:12,016 THIS IS WHEN YOU, Y'ALL STAND TOGETHER WITH THE COMMUNITY, 217 00:12:12,016 --> 00:12:16,687 WITH SOCIETY, TO STOP, TO STOP THE GOVERNMENTAL OPPRESSION, 218 00:12:16,687 --> 00:12:19,724 PERIOD. WE NEED YOU. 219 00:12:19,724 --> 00:12:21,125 >> I AGREE BUT. 220 00:12:21,125 --> 00:12:24,762 >> SO MARCH WITH US. Y'ALL GET YOUR PEOPLE, MARCH 221 00:12:24,762 --> 00:12:30,234 BESIDE US, MARCH BESIDE US. SHOW US THAT YOU ARE HERE FOR US. 222 00:12:30,234 --> 00:12:31,235 MAKE HISTORY WITH US. 223 00:12:31,235 --> 00:12:33,204 >> WE ARE PROTECTING SOME OF THESE BUSINESSES. 224 00:12:33,204 --> 00:12:35,873 >> OKAY, OKAY. WILL YOU DO ME A FAVOR? 225 00:12:35,873 --> 00:12:42,179 CAN YOU DO ME AFAVOR? CAN CAN YOU TAKE A KNEE? 226 00:12:42,179 --> 00:12:46,050 CAN YOU MAKE A KNEE? THAT AIN'T ENOUGH FOR ME. 227 00:12:46,050 --> 00:12:49,720 >> THANK YOU! 228 00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:50,921 >> THANK YOU. 229 00:12:50,921 --> 00:12:54,658 >> Jimmy: NOW YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T FEEL LIKE THE KNEE WAS 230 00:12:54,658 --> 00:12:57,328 ENOUGH FROM THOSE GUYS. 231 00:12:57,328 --> 00:12:58,062 >> YEAH. 232 00:12:58,062 --> 00:12:58,896 >> Jimmy: YEAH. 233 00:12:58,896 --> 00:13:01,599 >> YEAH, BECAUSE I FELT LIKE WE HAD AN OPPORTUNITY IN THAT 234 00:13:01,599 --> 00:13:05,136 MOMENT TO, YOU KNOW, WE HAVE THE CURRENT ADMINISTRATION MAKING A 235 00:13:05,136 --> 00:13:07,405 POINT TO MAKE A STATEMENT ABOUT DIVISION. 236 00:13:07,405 --> 00:13:11,042 I FELT LIKE LET'S JUST COME TOGETHER. LET'S BE BEYOND THAT. 237 00:13:11,042 --> 00:13:13,677 LET'S BE BEYOND WHAT'S HAPPENING. IT WAS A RUSK. 238 00:13:13,677 --> 00:13:18,549 I UNDERSTAND HE HAS A JOB TO DO. BUT I THINK IN MY MIND I WAS 239 00:13:18,549 --> 00:13:25,122 JUST THINKING, WHAT IF YOUR JOB IS TELLING YOU TO DO SOMETHING 240 00:13:25,122 --> 00:13:26,690 YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN, I KNOW YOU WANT TO BE OUT HERE WITH ME. 241 00:13:26,690 --> 00:13:34,131 I KNOW WE WANT TO WALK SIDE BY SIDE, SO LET'S JUST DO IT. 242 00:13:34,131 --> 00:13:37,935 >> Jimmy: I THAT INK THAT'S A DILEMMA A LOT IN THE MILITARY 243 00:13:37,935 --> 00:13:41,572 HAVE. I HEARD YOU GOT A CALL FROM JOE 244 00:13:41,572 --> 00:13:42,006 BIDEN. 245 00:13:42,006 --> 00:13:44,175 >> HE WANTED TO TALK TO ME AFTER THAT I SUPPOSE. 246 00:13:44,175 --> 00:13:46,477 WE HAD A CONVERSATION. I DIDN'T GET TO ASK HIM 247 00:13:46,477 --> 00:13:49,513 EVERYTHING I WANTED TO ASK HIM, BUT IT WAS GOOD TO TALK, YOU 248 00:13:49,513 --> 00:13:52,650 KNOW, AND HEAR WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT AND WHAT HE'S SAYING. 249 00:13:52,650 --> 00:13:54,718 YOU KNOW, RIGHT NOW. 250 00:13:54,718 --> 00:13:58,089 >> Jimmy: MM‐HM. AND DID YOU FEEL THAT HE IS ON 251 00:13:58,089 --> 00:14:00,858 THE RIGHT TRACK? 252 00:14:00,858 --> 00:14:02,860 >> SUCH A LOADED QUESTION, RIGHT? 253 00:14:02,860 --> 00:14:06,697 BECAUSE I MEAN, I GUESS HE WAS, SO I GUESS HE WAS COOL, BUT I 254 00:14:06,697 --> 00:14:12,870 CAN'T SAY I WAS, AFTER THE CONVO I FELT THRILLED OR EXCITED PER 255 00:14:12,870 --> 00:14:16,207 SE, BUT IT WAS GOOD TO TALK AND JUST TO HEAR FIRST HAND. 256 00:14:16,207 --> 00:14:18,576 >> Jimmy: DID YOU TELL JOE WHEN YOU HAD HIM ON THE PHONE THAT 257 00:14:18,576 --> 00:14:22,947 YOU HAVE A NEW SINGLE OUT CALLED "THICK"? 258 00:14:22,947 --> 00:14:27,518 >> NO, I DID NOT SHARE WITH JOE MY NEW SINGLE "THICK". 259 00:14:27,518 --> 00:14:30,688 I DIDN'T SHARE THAT WITH JOE. I PROBABLY WOULD HAVE PUT HIM 260 00:14:30,688 --> 00:14:33,057 OUT WITH THAT. HE NOT READY FOR THE THICKNESS. 261 00:14:33,057 --> 00:14:36,260 >> Jimmy: I LIKE THE IDEA BEHIND "THICK." 262 00:14:36,260 --> 00:14:40,297 TELL EVERYBODY WHAT THE SONG'S ABOUT. 263 00:14:40,297 --> 00:14:46,737 >> SOIVE I'VE BEEN HAVING SO M FUN WITH MY MUSIC LATELY, A 264 00:14:46,737 --> 00:14:54,612 MOMENT OF SPRESPOND NAYITY. WO WE'VE BEEN IN QUARANTINE, IVE 265 00:14:54,612 --> 00:14:58,115 ABEEN GETTING REALLY THICK. YOU'RE IN THE HOUSE. 266 00:14:58,115 --> 00:14:58,716 YOU'RE EATING. 267 00:14:58,716 --> 00:15:01,652 >> Jimmy: I KNOW. THE REFRIGERATOR'S IN THE HOUSE 268 00:15:01,652 --> 00:15:03,954 IS THE PROBLEM. IF I COULD MOVE THE REFRIGERATOR 269 00:15:03,954 --> 00:15:07,992 TO WORK I WOULD BE OKAY. HEY, EVERY NIGHT I WILL BE 270 00:15:07,992 --> 00:15:14,665 MAKING A DONATION, AND TONIGHT YOU'VE CHOSEN THE CHARITY BLACK 271 00:15:14,665 --> 00:15:16,700 VISIONS COLLECTIVE. TELL US A LUITTLE ABOUT THAT. 272 00:15:16,700 --> 00:15:20,004 >> I LIKE THE BLACK VISIONS COLLECTIVE BECAUSE THEY'RE 273 00:15:20,004 --> 00:15:27,278 TALKING ABOUT THE FUTURE OF BLACK PEOPLE, AND ALSO WHAT I 274 00:15:27,278 --> 00:15:31,415 LOVE ABOUT THEM SPUECIFICALLY I THEY INCLUDE THE LGBTQ COMMUNITY. 275 00:15:31,415 --> 00:15:33,184 SOMETIMES THEY CAN BE OVERSHADOWED. 276 00:15:33,184 --> 00:15:37,254 THAT'S WHAT I THINK MOSTLY I WAS EXCITED ABOUT, IT'S ALL BLACK 277 00:15:37,254 --> 00:15:38,155 LIVES MATTERS. 278 00:15:38,155 --> 00:15:45,129 >> Jimmy: THE WEBSITE IS BLACKVISIONSMM.ORG. 279 00:15:45,129 --> 00:15:47,831 THANK YOU VERY MUCH, KEKE. GREAT TO SEE YOU. 280 00:15:47,831 --> 00:15:51,068 >> THANK YOU, IT'S GOOD SEEING YOU, TOO, MAN. 281 00:15:51,068 --> 00:15:52,532 I HOPE WE GET TO SEE EACH OTHER SOON IN PERSON. 282 00:15:58,378 --> 00:15:59,077 >> Dicky: THE JUIMMY "JIMMY KIM 283 00:15:59,077 --> 00:16:03,081 LIVE" CONSRT SERIES IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY MERCEDES BENZ. 284 00:16:03,081 --> 00:16:05,550 >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK TO "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE" FROM MY HOUSE. 285 00:16:05,550 --> 00:16:12,290 THIS ‐‐ YOU ARE GOING TO LIKE THIS. 286 00:16:12,290 --> 00:16:15,160 >> JIMMY KIMMEL, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR HAVING US. 287 00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:20,365 WE WANT YOU TO DECLARE VICTORY IN YOUR LIFE. 288 00:16:20,365 --> 00:16:21,466 ♪ 289 00:16:21,466 --> 00:16:21,933 ♪ WE DECLARE VICTORY 290 00:16:21,933 --> 00:16:27,138 VICTORY OVER YOUR LIFE EVERY NOW AND THEN 291 00:16:27,138 --> 00:16:30,642 IT'S HARD TO SEE ♪ 292 00:16:30,642 --> 00:16:35,146 ♪ BUT YOU GOT TO DECREE 293 00:16:35,146 --> 00:16:39,083 AND SEE VICTORY 294 00:16:39,083 --> 00:16:46,891 WE DECLARE VICTORY 295 00:16:46,891 --> 00:16:47,459 VICTORY OVER YOUR LIFE ♪ 296 00:16:47,459 --> 00:16:51,129 ♪ DON'T BE DISMAYED 297 00:16:51,129 --> 00:16:54,632 GOD KNOWS YOUR NEED 298 00:16:54,632 --> 00:16:59,137 BUT YOU GOT TO DECREE 299 00:16:59,137 --> 00:17:03,141 AND SEE VICTORY ♪ 300 00:17:03,141 --> 00:17:05,310 ♪ IT MAY APPEAR LIKE YOU'VE 301 00:17:05,310 --> 00:17:11,082 BEEN KNOCKED DOWN BUT WITH GOD YOU WON'T BE BOUND ♪ 302 00:17:11,082 --> 00:17:12,584 ♪ JUST OPEN UP 303 00:17:12,584 --> 00:17:18,623 YOUR MOUTH SPEAK A WORD OVER YOUR LIFE ♪ 304 00:17:18,623 --> 00:17:23,127 ♪ DON'T FEAR WE WALK BY 305 00:17:23,127 --> 00:17:30,001 FAITH AND NOT BY SIGHT WE DECLARE VICTORY 306 00:17:30,001 --> 00:17:36,641 VICTORY OVER YOUR LIFE ♪ VICTORY OVER YOUR LIFE ♪ 307 00:17:36,641 --> 00:17:39,077 ♪ EVERY NOW AND THEN 308 00:17:39,077 --> 00:17:42,614 IT'S HARD TO SEE 309 00:17:42,614 --> 00:17:47,085 BUT YOU GOT TO DECREE 310 00:17:47,085 --> 00:17:51,089 AND SEE VICTORY ♪ 311 00:17:51,089 --> 00:17:54,492 ♪ STOP SPEAKING NEGATIVITY 312 00:17:54,492 --> 00:17:57,128 IN YOUR ATMOSPHERE JUST WALK IN YOUR 313 00:17:57,128 --> 00:17:59,163 AUTHORITY FOR THE ♪ 314 00:17:59,163 --> 00:18:00,632 ♪ LORD IS NEAR 315 00:18:00,632 --> 00:18:06,638 I SERVE NOTICE TO THE ENEMY YOU CAN'T HAVE MY FAMILY ♪ 316 00:18:06,638 --> 00:18:11,075 ♪ YOU CAN'T HAVE MY MIND 317 00:18:11,075 --> 00:18:16,748 YOU CAN'T HAVE MY LIFE CAUSE JESUS SAID I COME 318 00:18:16,748 --> 00:18:18,683 THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE ♪ 319 00:18:18,683 --> 00:18:26,324 ♪ LIFE ABUNDANTLY 320 00:18:26,324 --> 00:18:33,565 PROSPER AND BE IN GOOD HEALTH 321 00:18:48,248 --> 00:18:51,369 ♪ 322 00:18:51,369 --> 00:18:52,284 >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK TO "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE" FROM MY HOUSE. 323 00:18:52,284 --> 00:18:53,919 EVEN THOUGH IT FEELS LIKE WE HAVE ALL BEEN SITTING AROUND 324 00:18:53,919 --> 00:18:55,521 DOING NOTHING FOR MONTHS, QUARANTINE HAS ACTUALLY BEEN 325 00:18:55,521 --> 00:18:56,722 BUSY FOR MOST OF US. BUT AS GUILLERMO RECENTLY 326 00:18:56,722 --> 00:19:01,427 LEARNED, IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE HARD. 327 00:19:01,427 --> 00:19:04,897 >> Guillermo: I KNOW IT SEEMS LIKE I DON'T WORK TOO MUCH, BUT 328 00:19:04,897 --> 00:19:09,968 I HAVE A LOT ON MY PLATE. I HAVE TO EXERCISE. HELP ME! 329 00:19:09,968 --> 00:19:13,772 HELP ME! I HAVE TO GIVE MY SON A HAIRCUT. 330 00:19:13,772 --> 00:19:15,474 I HAVE TO MAKE DINNER. 331 00:19:15,474 --> 00:19:23,415 AND THEN I HAVE TO DO THE DISHES. 332 00:19:23,415 --> 00:19:25,417 HEY, DIXIE, TAKE SOMETHING OFF MY PLATE. 333 00:19:25,417 --> 00:19:27,820 >> Jimmy: WHAT CAN DIXIE TAKE OFF YOUR PLATE? 334 00:19:27,820 --> 00:19:34,193 HEAD TO DIXIE OFF MY PLATE.COM, AND TELL DIXEY WHAT THEY CAN 335 00:19:34,193 --> 00:19:37,196 TAKE OFF YOUR PLATE, WHETHER IT'S HELP WITH THE DISHES, A NEW 336 00:19:37,196 --> 00:19:40,833 LAWNMOWER OR AN EPIC WAY TO OCCUPY THE KIDS. 337 00:19:40,833 --> 00:19:45,337 YOU COULD BE ONE OF 500 WINNERS SELECTED EACH WEEK. 338 00:19:45,337 --> 00:19:49,408 >> Guillermo: THANK YOU, DIXIE. 339 00:19:49,408 --> 00:19:54,680 >> Dicky: SHARE YOUR NEED WITH DIXIE AT DIXIEOFFMYPLATE.COM. 340 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:55,481 >> Jimmy: THAT IS THE TIME WE HAVE. 341 00:19:55,481 --> 00:19:57,649 I'D LIKE TO THANK KEKE PALMER, THE CLARK SISTERS, AND APOLOGIZE 342 00:19:57,649 --> 00:19:58,851 TO MATT DAMON. "NIGHTLINE" IS NEXT. 343 00:19:58,851 --> 00:20:00,552 NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME, I'M GONNA GO STAND IN FRONT OF THE 344 00:20:00,552 --> 00:20:04,052 REFRIGERATOR. GOODNIGHT. 29428

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