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♪ BA, DA, BA, BA, DA, BA, ♪
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BA, DA, BA, BA, DA, BA, ♪
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♪ JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE
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THIS IS RIDICULOUS.
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>> Jimmy: HELLO, AND WELCOME.
MY NAME IS JIMMY KIMMEL.
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I HOST A TALK SHOW IN MY KITCHEN.
WHICH WAS PREVIOUSLY SOMETHING
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YOU MIGHT HEAR FROM SOMEONE WITH
PARANOIA AND DELUSIONS.
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SO, MAYBE I'M NOT HOSTING A SHOW.
MAYBE I'M CRAZY!
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SPEAKING OF CRAZY, WE
HAVE A BIGLY MILESTONE ON THE
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WAY. THIS WEEKEND, DONALD TRUMP
CELEBRATES HIS BIRTHDAY,
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NUMBER 74!
SO BREAK OUT THE KETCHUP AND
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CAKE. DONALD TRUMP WAS BORN ON
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JUNE 14th, 1946, WHEN A PILE OF
SOGGY CHEESE FRIES WAS STRUCK BY
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A BOLT OF ORANGE LIGHTNING.
TRUMP SUPPORTERS IN FLORIDA,
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MICHIGAN AND ARKANSAS ARE
HOLDING EVENTS TO CELEBRATE.
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AND WHAT BETTER WAY TO HONOR THE
PRESIDENT THAN BY GATHERING, TO
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CONTRACT THE VERY VIRUS WHOSE
EXISTENCE HE DENIES?
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BY THE WAY, HERE'S ONE OF
DONALD TRUMP'S OLD BIRTHDAY
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INVITATIONS FROM A PARTY HE HAD
IN 1994.
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THE THEME WAS "TRUMP: LORD OF
THE FINANCIAL JUNGLE."
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THAT'S HIM AND MARLA MAPLES IN
JUNGLE GARB.
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THIS CARD IS AMAZING FOR SO MANY
REASONS.
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THIS WAS 26 YEARS AGO AND
NOTHING DEPICTED IN IT NOW
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EXISTS.
THAT BODY IS FAKE, THE CASINO
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WENT BANKRUPT, THE MARRIAGE
ENDED, THAT HAIR IS GONE.
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EVEN THE ELEPHANT IN THE
BACKGROUND WAS SHOT AND KILLED
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BY DONALD JR.
THE PRESIDENT HAD A BUSY DAY OF
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TRAVEL TODAY, BUT HE DID FIND
TIME TO TWEET. A LOT.
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LAST NIGHT, HE WROTE ABOUT
OCCUPY PROTESTS IN WASHINGTON
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STATE.
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HE MUST ARE HAVE BEEN WATCHING
TV AND TWEETED
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"RADICAL LEFT GOVERNOR
@JAYINSLEE AND THE MAYOR OF
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SEATTLE ARE BEING TAUNTED AND
PLAYED AT A LEVEL THAT OUR GREAT
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COUNTRY HAS NEVER SEEN BEFORE.
TAKE BACK YOUR CITY NOW.
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IF YOU DON'T DO IT, I WILL.
THIS IS NOT A GAME.
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THESE UGLY ANARCHISTS MUST BE
STOOPED IMMEDIATELY. MOVE FAST!"
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THEY MUST BE STOOPED!
THE MAYOR OF SEATTLE TWEETED IN
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RESPONSE "GO BACK TO YOUR
BUNKER."
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OH, THAT BUNKER THING MUST BE
DRIVING HIM NUTS.
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WHY HE GETS INVOLVED IN THIS
SORT OF THING, I HAVE NO IDEA.
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BUT HE IS CLEARLY SURROUNDED BY
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PEOPLE WHO ARE "STOOPED."
THE AWARD FOR MOST STOOPED THIS
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WEEK GOES TO
TRUMP'S CHIEF ECONOMIC ADVISOR,
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LARRY KUDLOW, WHO ASTONISHED
EVEN THE MOST HARDENED AMONG US
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BY SAYING THIS.
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>> YOU SAID YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN
SYSTEMIC RACISM?
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>> I DO NOT.
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>> AT ALL IN THE U. S.?
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>> I DO NOT.
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>> SYSTEM IC RACISM AGAINST
AFRICAN‐AMERICANS IN THE UNITED
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STATES?
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>> I'LL SAY IT AGAIN, I DO NOT.
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>> Jimmy: "SIR, ONE MORE
QUESTION.
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CAN YOU NAME A BLACK PERSON?
JUST ONE. GO AHEAD."
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I MEAN, THAT'S SO STUPID I DON'T
THINK EVEN DONALD TRUMP WOULD
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SAY IT!
THIS, BY THE WAY, IS THE SAME
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GUY WHO SAID CORONAVIRUS WAS
CONTAINED THREE MONTHS AGO AND
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HE'S STILL THERE.
STILL REPORTING FOR DUTY.
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ONLY THE BEST PEOPLE.
ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE COIN,
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THE SIDE LINCOLN IS ON, NASCAR
YESTERDAY ANNOUNCED THAT THEY
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WILL NO LONGER ALLOW CONFEDERATE
FLAGS AT THEIR RACE EVENTS.
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THEY PUT OUT A STATEMENT SAYING
THE FLAG RUNS CONTRARY TO
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PROVIDING A WELCOMING AND
INCLUSIVE ENVIRONMENT FOR FANS,
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AND A LOT OF FANS DIDN'T LIKE
THAT. LOTS OF TWEETS.
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"YOU PICKED THE LOSING SIDE OF
THIS BATTLE.
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GOOD LUCK WITH THAT."
I DON'T KNOW.
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PRETTY SURE THE CONFEDERACY WAS
THE LOSING SIDE OF THE BATTLE.
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"PRETTY SOON WE WILL HAVE RADIOS
IN THE CAR PLAYING RAP MUSIC."
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OH, HEAVENS NO. NOT "RAP MUSIC!"
"BUT I BET PEOPLE CAN FLY THEIR
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RAINBOW FLAGS ALL DAY." RIGHT.
FROM NOW ON, NASCAR IS GONNA BE
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ONE BIG GAY PARADE.
"BYE BYE NASCAR.
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I HAVE BEEN A FAN FOR 50 PLUS
YEARS.
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STAY OUT OF POLITICS AND SOCIAL
ISSUES. JUST RACE!"
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ACTUALLY, RACE IS EXACTLY WHAT
THIS IS ABOUT.
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AND, "WELP JUST ANOTHER SPORT I
WON'T WATCH.
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GONNA HAVE A LOT OF TIME
TRAVELING THIS BEAUTIFUL
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COUNTRY, FISHING AND SPENDING
TIME WITH MY GRANDCHILDREN."
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I HAVE BAD NEWS FOR YOUR PAL.
IN TEN YEARS, YOUR GRANDCHILDREN
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WILL BE DESCRIBING YOU AS "MY
RACIST GRANDPA."
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SO NASCAR NOW HAS DONE MORE TO
FIGHT RACISM THAN THE WHITE
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HOUSE.
BUT THE PRESIDENT IS GETTING
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BACK OUT THERE.
TONIGHT HE PRESSED THE FLESH AT
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A FUNDRAISER IN DALLAS.
NO MASKS, OF COURSE. THAT'S NUTS.
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HAVING PARTIES, SHAKING HANDS.
DALLAS ISN'T EVEN A SAFE PLACE
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FOR PRESIDENTS WHEN THERE ISN'T
A VIRUS.
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AND HE IS WEEK‐ENDING AT HIS
GOLF CLUB IN NEW JERSEY.
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SEE THAT?
HE'S FIGHTING THE PANDEMIC AND
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RACISM AT THE SAME TIME, BY NOT
WEARING A MASK TO HIS VERY WHITE
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GOLF CLUB.
THE PRESIDENT IS PLANNING TO HIT
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THE ROAD WITH A SERIES OF
CAMPAIGN RALLIES, STARTING IN
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TULSA NEXT WEEK.
BIG CROWDS ARE EXPECTED.
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AND EVEN WELCOMED.
BUT ANYONE WHO GETS A TICKET HAS
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TO AGREE IN WRITING NOT TO SUE
TRUMP IF THEY GET SICK. FOR REAL.
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YOU HAVE TO CLICK THIS LIABILITY
RELEASE TO REGISTER.
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00:04:53,012 --> 00:04:56,382
IT'S LIKE BEING PREGNANT ON A
ROLLERCOASTER.
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BUT GO AHEAD AND TAKE A BIG SWIG
OF BLEACH BEFORE YOU COME
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ANYWAY.
I GUESS THE PLAN IS TO JUST
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IGNORE THE VIRUS NOW AND HOPE IT
GOES AWAY. BECAUSE YESTERDAY,
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REPUBLICANS ANNOUNCED THEY ARE
LIKELY TO MOVE THEIR CONVENTION
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00:05:08,361 --> 00:05:11,297
TO JACKSONVILLE, BECAUSE NORTH
CAROLINA, WHERE IT WAS SUPPOSED
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TO TAKE PLACE, ISN'T CRAY‐CRAY
ENOUGH FOR THEIR CURRENT LEVEL
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OF CRAY.
THEY ARE NOT INTERESTED IN
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SAFETY.
WHAT THEY'RE PROMISING IS THAT
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THIS WILL BE A BLOWOUT BASH!
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>> WANT TO KEEP AMERICA GREAT?
JOIN US IN JACKSONVILLE, FOR THE
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2020 REPUBLICAN NATIONAL
CONVENTION, WITH ALL YOUR
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FAVORITE STARS AND, NO SOCIAL
DISTANCING!
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MONDAY, AUGUST 24th, WE'RE
PACKING IN MORE MOUTH‐BREATHING
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DEPLORABLES THAN EVER BEFORE,
AND WE'RE TURNING OFF THE
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VENTILATION!
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HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, LIB‐TARDS?
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HUNGRY?
NO NAPKINS, NO SNEEZE GUARDS, NO
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UTENSILS ALLOWED.
GRAB UP SHRIMP AND SAY FORK YOU!
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THE EXCITEMENT IS CONTAGIOUS.
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>> MUST BE 14.
NO SHIRT, NO SHOES, NO PROBLEM.
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NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT HAPPENS
TWO WEEKS LATER.
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>> Jimmy: FLORIDA, STILL THE
NUMBER ONE PLACE TO DIE.
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BUT FLORIDA ISN'T ALONE.
WE ARE OPENING THINGS UP, FOR
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BETTER OR WORSE, HERE IN
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CALIFORNIA TOO.
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00:06:30,977 --> 00:06:34,647
IN NEW YORK, THEY PUT OUT A
SAFER SEX FACT SHEET.
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THIS IS REAL.
THIS IS FROM THE CITY OF NEW
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YORK. THEY RECOMMEND THAT DURING
INTERCOURSE YOU SHOULD WEAR A
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FACE COVERING OR MASK. OKAY. FUN.
THEY SUGGEST THAT YOU MASTER
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BAIT TOGETHER.
YOU KNOW, YOU'VE TRIED THAT.
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IT'S NOT THE SAME SINCE THEY
CLOSED THE MOVIE THEATERS.
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THEY TELL YOU TO BE CREATIVE
WITH SEXUAL POSITIONS AND
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PHYSICAL BARRIERS, LIKE WALLS
THAT ALLOW SEXUAL CONTACT WHILE
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PREVENTING CLOSE FACE‐TO‐FACE
CONTACT.
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IN OTHER WORDS, GLORY HOLES.
NEW YORK CITY IS RECOMMENDING
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GLORY HOLES.
THEY TELL YOU TO SKIP SEX IF YOU
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OR YOUR PARTNER AREN'T FEELING
WELL.
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MOST WIVES HAVE THAT ONE COVERED
AND THAT MEDICAL CONDITIONS THAT
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COULD PUT YOU AT RISK DURING SEX
INCLUDE LUNG DISEASE, HEART
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DISEASE, DIABETES, OBESITY.
SO GOOD NEWS FOR MELANIA WITH
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THAT ONE I GUESS.
THEY EVEN PROVIDED TIPS FOR
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GROUP SEX.
LARGE GATHERINGS OF ANY TYPE ARE
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NOT SAFE DURING COVID‐19.
BUT IF YOU DECIDE TO FIND A
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00:07:33,573 --> 00:07:39,679
CROWD, BELOW ARE TIPS TO REDUCE
YOUR RISK OF SPREADING OR
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00:07:39,679 --> 00:07:46,319
GETTING COVID‐19.
LIMIT YUTHE SIZE OF YOUR GUEST
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LIST.
PICK LARGER, MORE OPEN, AND WELL
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VENTILATED SPACE.
BRING AN ALCOHOL‐BASED HAND
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SANITIZER.
CAN YOU IMAGINE ROLLING INTO AN
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00:07:56,128 --> 00:07:59,098
ORGY WITH A PUMP BOTTLE OF
PURELL?
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EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO
WEAR THESE ANDREW CUOMO
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UNDERPANTS, WHICH ARE AVAILABLE
NOW ON ETSY.
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WE HAVE OUR OWN EXPERT ON THE
SHOW ON SEX AND EVERYTHING ELSE.
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FROM HER HOME IN LOS ANGELES
IT'S TIME FOR A QUARANTINE
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EDITION OF DEAR AUNT CHIPPY.
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>> OKAY. HERE WE ARE.
NOW THAT MY UPSTAIRS NEIGHBORS
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ARE HOME ALL DAY, ALL THEY DO IS
HAVE SEX.
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WHAT'S SOMETHING SUM IMPLE I CO
YELL AT THEM TO MAKE THEM STOP?
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FIRE! JUST YELL FIRE!
I'M SURE THEY WILL STOP HAVING
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SEX IF THEY HEAR "FIRE."
WHAT A MORON. AH.
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>> Jimmy: WELL, THANKS, AUNT
CHIPPY.
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WE HAVE MUSIC FROM THE CLARK
SISTERS, AND WE'LL BE BACK WITH
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KEKE PALMER.
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>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK TO "JIMMY
KIMMEL LIVE" FROM MY HOUSE.
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00:09:03,828 --> 00:09:06,664
LATER ON THE SHOW WE HAVE
SOMETHING VERY SPECIAL.
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00:09:06,664 --> 00:09:09,834
THEY HAVE THREE GRAMMYS, AND A
MOVIE ON LIFETIME CALLED "THE
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00:09:09,834 --> 00:09:14,672
CLARK SISTERS: FIRST LADIES OF
GOSPEL."
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00:09:14,672 --> 00:09:19,811
THE LEGENDARY CLARK SISTERS WILL
TALK US TO CHURCH ON A THURSDAY
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00:09:19,811 --> 00:09:21,279
NIGHT. NEXT WEEK, JOIN US WITH
MARK RUFFALO, SARAH PAULSON,
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00:09:21,279 --> 00:09:22,713
BILL BURR, THE ROASTMASTER
GENERAL JEFF ROSS AND
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00:09:22,713 --> 00:09:25,316
AMY SCHUMER TOO.
OUR GUEST TONIGHT IS AN ACTRESS,
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00:09:25,316 --> 00:09:27,385
ACTIVIST, RECORDING ARTIST AND
TALK SHOW HOST.
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00:09:27,385 --> 00:09:31,189
SHE IS ALSO THE STAR OF AN
INSPIRING VIRAL VIDEO, PLEASE
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00:09:31,189 --> 00:09:36,627
WELCOME KEKE PALMER. HI, KEKE.
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00:09:36,627 --> 00:09:39,797
>> HOW ARE YOU?
IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU, MAN, IN
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00:09:39,797 --> 00:09:43,201
THIS NEW SURROUNDING.
JOIN IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU, TOO.
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00:09:43,201 --> 00:09:45,403
I LIKE THAT PAINTING YOU HAVE ON
THE WALL.
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00:09:45,403 --> 00:09:47,772
>> I LIKE THOSE LOGS IN THE
BACK.
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00:09:47,772 --> 00:09:50,308
JOIN THANKS, EVERYBODY LOVES MY
LOGS.
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00:09:50,308 --> 00:09:55,646
I THINK OF YOU AS A VERY UPBEAT
PERSON, AND I THINK EVERY KEKE
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00:09:55,646 --> 00:09:57,982
HAS TO BE AN UPBEAT PERSON.
IT JUST GOES WITH THE NAME.
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00:09:57,982 --> 00:10:01,385
ARE YOU FEELING UPBEAT?
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00:10:01,385 --> 00:10:04,622
>> UM, I THINK, I DO FEEL
UPBEAT.
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00:10:04,622 --> 00:10:10,661
I'M A POSITIVE PERSON BY NATURE,
BUT I DO THINK MY EMPATHIC SIDE
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00:10:10,661 --> 00:10:14,532
IS BEING WEIGHED DOWN BY WHAT'S
GOING ON RIGHT NOW.
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00:10:14,532 --> 00:10:18,569
>> Jimmy: THIS VIDEO I
REFERENCED HAS 25 MILLION VIEWS.
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00:10:18,569 --> 00:10:21,873
BEFORE WE SHOW IT, I WANT TO
ASK, HAVE YOU BEEN TO A PROTEST
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OF ANY KIND BEFORE?
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00:10:24,475 --> 00:10:25,409
>> UM, YES.
I MEAN, I WENT TO THE PROTESTS
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00:10:25,409 --> 00:10:28,846
IN FERGUSON FOR MIKE BROWN.
YOU'VE BEEN TO MANY DIFFERENT
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00:10:28,846 --> 00:10:33,718
PROTESTS, BUT NOT ONE LOOK THIS
IN A TOMB LUKE, I MEAN, LIKE
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00:10:33,718 --> 00:10:35,586
THIS.
I THINK ESPECIALLY WITH ALL THE
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00:10:35,586 --> 00:10:39,023
STUFF THAT WAS HAPPENING WITH
QUARANTINE, SO KIND OF JUST
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00:10:39,023 --> 00:10:41,993
BEING AROUND THAT MANY PEOPLE AT
ONCE WAS, IT WAS A LOT.
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00:10:41,993 --> 00:10:44,795
IT WAS DIFFERENT.
IT WAS A DIFFERENT ENERGY, I
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00:10:44,795 --> 00:10:48,332
THINK, BECAUSE NONE OF US HAD
BEEN ANYWHERE IN A WHILE.
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00:10:48,332 --> 00:10:50,801
>> Jimmy: WERE YOU THINKING
ABOUT WHAT YOU MIGHT SAY IF YOU
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00:10:50,801 --> 00:10:54,005
WERE CONFRONTED WITH, IN THIS
CASE, NATIONAL GUARD?
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00:10:54,005 --> 00:10:57,975
HAD YOU THOUGHT ABOUT THAT
BEFORE YOU SAID WHAT YOU SAID?
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00:10:57,975 --> 00:11:02,647
>> NO.
I DIDN'T PLAN ON REALLY SEEING
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00:11:02,647 --> 00:11:04,181
NUB
ANYBODY OUT THERE LIKE THAT OUT
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00:11:04,181 --> 00:11:07,285
THERE.
WE WERE JUST MARCHING, WALKING,
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00:11:07,285 --> 00:11:11,656
I HADN'T BEEN AROUND MUCH PEOPLE
IN A WHILE, SO I REALLY, REALLY
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WANTED TO BE OUT THERE AND
PROTEST FOR THIS CAUSE.
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AND THEN I SAW, THOUGH, THE
NATIONAL GUARDSMEN, AND THEY
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00:11:17,795 --> 00:11:21,399
WERE LIKE BLOCKING US FROM GOING
FURTHER WITH THE PEACEFUL
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00:11:21,399 --> 00:11:23,200
PROTEST.
AND I THINK IN THAT MOMENT I WAS
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00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:26,671
JUST KIND OF, I WAS WEIRDED OUT
A BIT AND KIND OF CONFUSED I
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00:11:26,671 --> 00:11:30,708
THINK FROM A GENUINE, NAÏVE
PLACE OF BEING CONFUSED AS TO
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00:11:30,708 --> 00:11:33,811
WHY THERE'S THIS SEPARATION
BETWEEN US, LIKE THEY'RE HUMAN
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00:11:33,811 --> 00:11:36,180
LIKE I'M HUMAN.
I KNOW THEY HAVE A JOB TO DO,
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00:11:36,180 --> 00:11:39,951
BUT I DON'T KNOW, I FELT LIKE,
WHY CAN'T THEY BE WITH US,
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00:11:39,951 --> 00:11:45,923
MARCHING WITH US.
ESPECIALLY NOW, I FOEEL LIKE EVN
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00:11:45,923 --> 00:11:49,527
WITH WHAT HAPPENED WITH GENERAL
MILLEY, THERE'S A DIVISION FROM
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00:11:49,527 --> 00:11:52,630
EVERY ANGLE, WHETHER YOU'RE IN
THE MILITARY, BLACK, WHITE,
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00:11:52,630 --> 00:11:54,131
WHATEVER.
WE ALL NEED TO COME TOGETHER,
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00:11:54,131 --> 00:11:57,969
AND I THINK I JUST WAS REALLY
OVERWHELMED, AND I DIDN'T KNOW
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00:11:57,969 --> 00:12:01,272
REALLY WHAT I WAS SAYING.
I WAS JUST REALLY SPEAKING FROM
213
00:12:01,272 --> 00:12:04,942
MY HEART AND HOW I WAS FEELING,
AND, YOU KNOW, THAT WAS THAT.
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00:12:04,942 --> 00:12:07,445
>> Jimmy: LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT
WHAT HAPPENED THERE.
215
00:12:07,445 --> 00:12:09,280
>> YOU HAVE PEOPLE IN HERE THAT
NEED YOUR HELP.
216
00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:12,016
THIS IS WHEN YOU, Y'ALL STAND
TOGETHER WITH THE COMMUNITY,
217
00:12:12,016 --> 00:12:16,687
WITH SOCIETY, TO STOP, TO STOP
THE GOVERNMENTAL OPPRESSION,
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00:12:16,687 --> 00:12:19,724
PERIOD. WE NEED YOU.
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00:12:19,724 --> 00:12:21,125
>> I AGREE BUT.
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>> SO MARCH WITH US.
Y'ALL GET YOUR PEOPLE, MARCH
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00:12:24,762 --> 00:12:30,234
BESIDE US, MARCH BESIDE US.
SHOW US THAT YOU ARE HERE FOR US.
222
00:12:30,234 --> 00:12:31,235
MAKE HISTORY WITH US.
223
00:12:31,235 --> 00:12:33,204
>> WE ARE PROTECTING SOME OF
THESE BUSINESSES.
224
00:12:33,204 --> 00:12:35,873
>> OKAY, OKAY.
WILL YOU DO ME A FAVOR?
225
00:12:35,873 --> 00:12:42,179
CAN YOU DO ME AFAVOR? CAN
CAN YOU TAKE A KNEE?
226
00:12:42,179 --> 00:12:46,050
CAN YOU MAKE A KNEE?
THAT AIN'T ENOUGH FOR ME.
227
00:12:46,050 --> 00:12:49,720
>> THANK YOU!
228
00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:50,921
>> THANK YOU.
229
00:12:50,921 --> 00:12:54,658
>> Jimmy: NOW YOU SAID YOU
DIDN'T FEEL LIKE THE KNEE WAS
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00:12:54,658 --> 00:12:57,328
ENOUGH FROM THOSE GUYS.
231
00:12:57,328 --> 00:12:58,062
>> YEAH.
232
00:12:58,062 --> 00:12:58,896
>> Jimmy: YEAH.
233
00:12:58,896 --> 00:13:01,599
>> YEAH, BECAUSE I FELT LIKE WE
HAD AN OPPORTUNITY IN THAT
234
00:13:01,599 --> 00:13:05,136
MOMENT TO, YOU KNOW, WE HAVE THE
CURRENT ADMINISTRATION MAKING A
235
00:13:05,136 --> 00:13:07,405
POINT TO MAKE A STATEMENT ABOUT
DIVISION.
236
00:13:07,405 --> 00:13:11,042
I FELT LIKE LET'S JUST COME
TOGETHER. LET'S BE BEYOND THAT.
237
00:13:11,042 --> 00:13:13,677
LET'S BE BEYOND WHAT'S HAPPENING.
IT WAS A RUSK.
238
00:13:13,677 --> 00:13:18,549
I UNDERSTAND HE HAS A JOB TO DO.
BUT I THINK IN MY MIND I WAS
239
00:13:18,549 --> 00:13:25,122
JUST THINKING, WHAT IF YOUR JOB
IS TELLING YOU TO DO SOMETHING
240
00:13:25,122 --> 00:13:26,690
YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN, I KNOW YOU
WANT TO BE OUT HERE WITH ME.
241
00:13:26,690 --> 00:13:34,131
I KNOW WE WANT TO WALK SIDE BY
SIDE, SO LET'S JUST DO IT.
242
00:13:34,131 --> 00:13:37,935
>> Jimmy: I THAT INK THAT'S A
DILEMMA A LOT IN THE MILITARY
243
00:13:37,935 --> 00:13:41,572
HAVE.
I HEARD YOU GOT A CALL FROM JOE
244
00:13:41,572 --> 00:13:42,006
BIDEN.
245
00:13:42,006 --> 00:13:44,175
>> HE WANTED TO TALK TO ME AFTER
THAT I SUPPOSE.
246
00:13:44,175 --> 00:13:46,477
WE HAD A CONVERSATION.
I DIDN'T GET TO ASK HIM
247
00:13:46,477 --> 00:13:49,513
EVERYTHING I WANTED TO ASK HIM,
BUT IT WAS GOOD TO TALK, YOU
248
00:13:49,513 --> 00:13:52,650
KNOW, AND HEAR WHAT HE'S TALKING
ABOUT AND WHAT HE'S SAYING.
249
00:13:52,650 --> 00:13:54,718
YOU KNOW, RIGHT NOW.
250
00:13:54,718 --> 00:13:58,089
>> Jimmy: MM‐HM.
AND DID YOU FEEL THAT HE IS ON
251
00:13:58,089 --> 00:14:00,858
THE RIGHT TRACK?
252
00:14:00,858 --> 00:14:02,860
>> SUCH A LOADED QUESTION,
RIGHT?
253
00:14:02,860 --> 00:14:06,697
BECAUSE I MEAN, I GUESS HE WAS,
SO I GUESS HE WAS COOL, BUT I
254
00:14:06,697 --> 00:14:12,870
CAN'T SAY I WAS, AFTER THE CONVO
I FELT THRILLED OR EXCITED PER
255
00:14:12,870 --> 00:14:16,207
SE, BUT IT WAS GOOD TO TALK AND
JUST TO HEAR FIRST HAND.
256
00:14:16,207 --> 00:14:18,576
>> Jimmy: DID YOU TELL JOE WHEN
YOU HAD HIM ON THE PHONE THAT
257
00:14:18,576 --> 00:14:22,947
YOU HAVE A NEW SINGLE OUT CALLED
"THICK"?
258
00:14:22,947 --> 00:14:27,518
>> NO, I DID NOT SHARE WITH JOE
MY NEW SINGLE "THICK".
259
00:14:27,518 --> 00:14:30,688
I DIDN'T SHARE THAT WITH JOE.
I PROBABLY WOULD HAVE PUT HIM
260
00:14:30,688 --> 00:14:33,057
OUT WITH THAT.
HE NOT READY FOR THE THICKNESS.
261
00:14:33,057 --> 00:14:36,260
>> Jimmy: I LIKE THE IDEA BEHIND
"THICK."
262
00:14:36,260 --> 00:14:40,297
TELL EVERYBODY WHAT THE SONG'S
ABOUT.
263
00:14:40,297 --> 00:14:46,737
>> SOIVE I'VE BEEN HAVING SO M
FUN WITH MY MUSIC LATELY, A
264
00:14:46,737 --> 00:14:54,612
MOMENT OF SPRESPOND NAYITY. WO
WE'VE BEEN IN QUARANTINE, IVE
265
00:14:54,612 --> 00:14:58,115
ABEEN GETTING REALLY THICK.
YOU'RE IN THE HOUSE.
266
00:14:58,115 --> 00:14:58,716
YOU'RE EATING.
267
00:14:58,716 --> 00:15:01,652
>> Jimmy: I KNOW.
THE REFRIGERATOR'S IN THE HOUSE
268
00:15:01,652 --> 00:15:03,954
IS THE PROBLEM.
IF I COULD MOVE THE REFRIGERATOR
269
00:15:03,954 --> 00:15:07,992
TO WORK I WOULD BE OKAY.
HEY, EVERY NIGHT I WILL BE
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00:15:07,992 --> 00:15:14,665
MAKING A DONATION, AND TONIGHT
YOU'VE CHOSEN THE CHARITY BLACK
271
00:15:14,665 --> 00:15:16,700
VISIONS COLLECTIVE.
TELL US A LUITTLE ABOUT THAT.
272
00:15:16,700 --> 00:15:20,004
>> I LIKE THE BLACK VISIONS
COLLECTIVE BECAUSE THEY'RE
273
00:15:20,004 --> 00:15:27,278
TALKING ABOUT THE FUTURE OF
BLACK PEOPLE, AND ALSO WHAT I
274
00:15:27,278 --> 00:15:31,415
LOVE ABOUT THEM SPUECIFICALLY I
THEY INCLUDE THE LGBTQ COMMUNITY.
275
00:15:31,415 --> 00:15:33,184
SOMETIMES THEY CAN BE
OVERSHADOWED.
276
00:15:33,184 --> 00:15:37,254
THAT'S WHAT I THINK MOSTLY I WAS
EXCITED ABOUT, IT'S ALL BLACK
277
00:15:37,254 --> 00:15:38,155
LIVES MATTERS.
278
00:15:38,155 --> 00:15:45,129
>> Jimmy: THE WEBSITE IS
BLACKVISIONSMM.ORG.
279
00:15:45,129 --> 00:15:47,831
THANK YOU VERY MUCH, KEKE.
GREAT TO SEE YOU.
280
00:15:47,831 --> 00:15:51,068
>> THANK YOU, IT'S GOOD SEEING
YOU, TOO, MAN.
281
00:15:51,068 --> 00:15:52,532
I HOPE WE GET TO SEE EACH OTHER
SOON IN PERSON.
282
00:15:58,378 --> 00:15:59,077
>> Dicky: THE JUIMMY "JIMMY KIM
283
00:15:59,077 --> 00:16:03,081
LIVE" CONSRT SERIES IS BROUGHT
TO YOU BY MERCEDES BENZ.
284
00:16:03,081 --> 00:16:05,550
>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK TO "JIMMY
KIMMEL LIVE" FROM MY HOUSE.
285
00:16:05,550 --> 00:16:12,290
THIS ‐‐ YOU ARE GOING TO LIKE
THIS.
286
00:16:12,290 --> 00:16:15,160
>> JIMMY KIMMEL, THANK YOU SO
MUCH FOR HAVING US.
287
00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:20,365
WE WANT YOU TO DECLARE VICTORY
IN YOUR LIFE.
288
00:16:20,365 --> 00:16:21,466
♪
289
00:16:21,466 --> 00:16:21,933
♪ WE DECLARE VICTORY
290
00:16:21,933 --> 00:16:27,138
VICTORY OVER YOUR LIFE
EVERY NOW AND THEN
291
00:16:27,138 --> 00:16:30,642
IT'S HARD TO SEE ♪
292
00:16:30,642 --> 00:16:35,146
♪ BUT YOU GOT TO DECREE
293
00:16:35,146 --> 00:16:39,083
AND SEE VICTORY
294
00:16:39,083 --> 00:16:46,891
WE DECLARE VICTORY
295
00:16:46,891 --> 00:16:47,459
VICTORY OVER YOUR LIFE ♪
296
00:16:47,459 --> 00:16:51,129
♪ DON'T BE DISMAYED
297
00:16:51,129 --> 00:16:54,632
GOD KNOWS YOUR NEED
298
00:16:54,632 --> 00:16:59,137
BUT YOU GOT TO DECREE
299
00:16:59,137 --> 00:17:03,141
AND SEE VICTORY ♪
300
00:17:03,141 --> 00:17:05,310
♪ IT MAY APPEAR LIKE YOU'VE
301
00:17:05,310 --> 00:17:11,082
BEEN KNOCKED DOWN BUT WITH GOD
YOU WON'T BE BOUND ♪
302
00:17:11,082 --> 00:17:12,584
♪ JUST OPEN UP
303
00:17:12,584 --> 00:17:18,623
YOUR MOUTH SPEAK A WORD
OVER YOUR LIFE ♪
304
00:17:18,623 --> 00:17:23,127
♪ DON'T FEAR WE WALK BY
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00:17:23,127 --> 00:17:30,001
FAITH AND NOT BY SIGHT
WE DECLARE VICTORY
306
00:17:30,001 --> 00:17:36,641
VICTORY OVER YOUR LIFE ♪
VICTORY OVER YOUR LIFE ♪
307
00:17:36,641 --> 00:17:39,077
♪ EVERY NOW AND THEN
308
00:17:39,077 --> 00:17:42,614
IT'S HARD TO SEE
309
00:17:42,614 --> 00:17:47,085
BUT YOU GOT TO DECREE
310
00:17:47,085 --> 00:17:51,089
AND SEE VICTORY ♪
311
00:17:51,089 --> 00:17:54,492
♪ STOP SPEAKING NEGATIVITY
312
00:17:54,492 --> 00:17:57,128
IN YOUR ATMOSPHERE
JUST WALK IN YOUR
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00:17:57,128 --> 00:17:59,163
AUTHORITY FOR THE ♪
314
00:17:59,163 --> 00:18:00,632
♪ LORD IS NEAR
315
00:18:00,632 --> 00:18:06,638
I SERVE NOTICE TO THE ENEMY
YOU CAN'T HAVE MY FAMILY ♪
316
00:18:06,638 --> 00:18:11,075
♪ YOU CAN'T HAVE MY MIND
317
00:18:11,075 --> 00:18:16,748
YOU CAN'T HAVE MY LIFE
CAUSE JESUS SAID I COME
318
00:18:16,748 --> 00:18:18,683
THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE ♪
319
00:18:18,683 --> 00:18:26,324
♪ LIFE ABUNDANTLY
320
00:18:26,324 --> 00:18:33,565
PROSPER AND BE IN GOOD HEALTH
321
00:18:48,248 --> 00:18:51,369
♪
322
00:18:51,369 --> 00:18:52,284
>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK TO "JIMMY
KIMMEL LIVE" FROM MY HOUSE.
323
00:18:52,284 --> 00:18:53,919
EVEN THOUGH IT FEELS LIKE WE
HAVE ALL BEEN SITTING AROUND
324
00:18:53,919 --> 00:18:55,521
DOING NOTHING FOR MONTHS,
QUARANTINE HAS ACTUALLY BEEN
325
00:18:55,521 --> 00:18:56,722
BUSY FOR MOST OF US.
BUT AS GUILLERMO RECENTLY
326
00:18:56,722 --> 00:19:01,427
LEARNED, IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE
HARD.
327
00:19:01,427 --> 00:19:04,897
>> Guillermo: I KNOW IT SEEMS
LIKE I DON'T WORK TOO MUCH, BUT
328
00:19:04,897 --> 00:19:09,968
I HAVE A LOT ON MY PLATE.
I HAVE TO EXERCISE. HELP ME!
329
00:19:09,968 --> 00:19:13,772
HELP ME!
I HAVE TO GIVE MY SON A HAIRCUT.
330
00:19:13,772 --> 00:19:15,474
I HAVE TO MAKE DINNER.
331
00:19:15,474 --> 00:19:23,415
AND THEN I HAVE TO DO THE DISHES.
332
00:19:23,415 --> 00:19:25,417
HEY, DIXIE, TAKE SOMETHING OFF
MY PLATE.
333
00:19:25,417 --> 00:19:27,820
>> Jimmy: WHAT CAN DIXIE TAKE
OFF YOUR PLATE?
334
00:19:27,820 --> 00:19:34,193
HEAD TO DIXIE OFF MY PLATE.COM,
AND TELL DIXEY WHAT THEY CAN
335
00:19:34,193 --> 00:19:37,196
TAKE OFF YOUR PLATE, WHETHER
IT'S HELP WITH THE DISHES, A NEW
336
00:19:37,196 --> 00:19:40,833
LAWNMOWER OR AN EPIC WAY TO
OCCUPY THE KIDS.
337
00:19:40,833 --> 00:19:45,337
YOU COULD BE ONE OF 500 WINNERS
SELECTED EACH WEEK.
338
00:19:45,337 --> 00:19:49,408
>> Guillermo: THANK YOU, DIXIE.
339
00:19:49,408 --> 00:19:54,680
>> Dicky: SHARE YOUR NEED WITH
DIXIE AT DIXIEOFFMYPLATE.COM.
340
00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:55,481
>> Jimmy: THAT IS THE TIME WE
HAVE.
341
00:19:55,481 --> 00:19:57,649
I'D LIKE TO THANK KEKE PALMER,
THE CLARK SISTERS, AND APOLOGIZE
342
00:19:57,649 --> 00:19:58,851
TO MATT DAMON.
"NIGHTLINE" IS NEXT.
343
00:19:58,851 --> 00:20:00,552
NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME, I'M
GONNA GO STAND IN FRONT OF THE
344
00:20:00,552 --> 00:20:04,052
REFRIGERATOR. GOODNIGHT.
29428
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