All language subtitles for Living Single - S03 E18 - Tibby or Not Tibby (480p - HULU Web-DL)

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,733 --> 00:00:03,500 [knock on door] 2 00:00:03,566 --> 00:00:04,846 Hey, hey. Something came for me? 3 00:00:04,870 --> 00:00:06,266 Yes. 4 00:00:06,333 --> 00:00:07,700 This lovely package 5 00:00:07,766 --> 00:00:11,100 from the very exclusive Robere's. 6 00:00:11,166 --> 00:00:13,633 And how do you know where it's from? 7 00:00:13,700 --> 00:00:17,100 Tracking code 878479, everyone knows that's Robere's. 8 00:00:19,366 --> 00:00:21,966 I'm impressed, yet frightened. Bye‐bye. 9 00:00:22,033 --> 00:00:24,300 So, uh.. What is it? 10 00:00:25,333 --> 00:00:26,600 Who is it for? 11 00:00:29,066 --> 00:00:32,466 Well, if you must know, O Bouncy One.. 12 00:00:32,533 --> 00:00:35,333 It is a silver bracelet, um, for my mother. 13 00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:37,566 Oh, ooh, oh, well, Kyle, man 14 00:00:37,633 --> 00:00:39,733 the engraver made a hell of mistake. 15 00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:44,500 'Cause they spelled mom, "M‐A‐X." 16 00:00:44,566 --> 00:00:46,133 You opened my box? 17 00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:48,166 It fell open 18 00:00:48,233 --> 00:00:50,166 when I tugged on the tape. 19 00:00:51,633 --> 00:00:54,466 So, is this one of those gifts that says 20 00:00:54,533 --> 00:00:57,800 "I'm sorry we broke up, let's get naked and reconcile?" 21 00:00:57,866 --> 00:00:59,100 [growls] 22 00:00:59,166 --> 00:01:00,166 [laughing] 23 00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:01,840 Regine, the picture you're painting for me 24 00:01:01,864 --> 00:01:03,773 is making me queasy and get off me. 25 00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:06,206 No, I ordered this for Max.. 26 00:01:06,273 --> 00:01:09,006 Before we broke up, when I had more money than sense. 27 00:01:09,073 --> 00:01:11,106 Umm.. 28 00:01:11,173 --> 00:01:13,673 And she is never going to hear about this 29 00:01:13,740 --> 00:01:15,573 right, little short person? 30 00:01:17,340 --> 00:01:19,373 Kyle? I can be discreet.. 31 00:01:19,440 --> 00:01:21,640 [laughing] 32 00:01:21,706 --> 00:01:22,640 Woo! 33 00:01:22,706 --> 00:01:23,706 For a price. 34 00:01:23,740 --> 00:01:25,373 A‐ha, okay. 35 00:01:25,440 --> 00:01:27,973 I merely want the gold Robere's box. 36 00:01:28,040 --> 00:01:31,140 It lends an air of class to any gift. 37 00:01:31,206 --> 00:01:34,840 Oh, Regine, do you honestly think anyone with taste 38 00:01:34,906 --> 00:01:36,506 is gonna think a gift comes from Robere's 39 00:01:36,573 --> 00:01:38,740 just because you put it in a little gold box? 40 00:01:38,806 --> 00:01:41,173 [chuckles] You obviously love the cufflinks 41 00:01:41,240 --> 00:01:43,273 I gave you last Christmas. 42 00:01:43,340 --> 00:01:46,306 Box by Robere's, links by Walmart. 43 00:01:51,740 --> 00:01:54,273 ♪ We are living ♪ ♪ Hey ♪ 44 00:01:54,340 --> 00:01:56,506 ♪ Single ♪ ♪ Ooh ♪ 45 00:01:56,573 --> 00:01:58,740 ♪ And in a nineties kind of world ♪ 46 00:01:58,806 --> 00:02:00,946 ♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪ 47 00:02:01,013 --> 00:02:02,289 ♪ Oh keep your head up ♪ ♪ What? ♪ 48 00:02:02,313 --> 00:02:03,656 ♪ Keep your head up ♪ ♪ That's right ♪ 49 00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:05,646 ♪ Whenever this life get tough you gotta fight ♪ 50 00:02:05,713 --> 00:02:07,846 ♪ With my homegirls standing to my left and my right ♪ 51 00:02:07,913 --> 00:02:09,746 ♪ True blue it's tight like glue ♪ 52 00:02:09,813 --> 00:02:11,613 ♪ We are living ♪ ♪ Check check check it out ♪ 53 00:02:11,646 --> 00:02:12,766 ♪ Check check check it out ♪ 54 00:02:12,813 --> 00:02:13,746 ♪ Single ♪ ♪ Do what you want ♪ 55 00:02:13,813 --> 00:02:16,080 ♪ No free position ♪ 56 00:02:16,146 --> 00:02:18,379 ♪ Haa ♪ 57 00:02:23,080 --> 00:02:24,746 [chuckling] Yeah.. 58 00:02:24,813 --> 00:02:26,346 Ohh‐wha, umm. 59 00:02:26,413 --> 00:02:27,746 Okay, he‐he, yeah. 60 00:02:27,813 --> 00:02:30,213 Wow, if you're like this when I give you a manicure 61 00:02:30,280 --> 00:02:32,780 what's it gonna be like I get to your toes? 62 00:02:32,846 --> 00:02:34,780 Oh.. 63 00:02:34,846 --> 00:02:36,813 Don't mess with my toes, mama. 64 00:02:38,046 --> 00:02:40,280 Unless you got a couple of hours to kill. 65 00:02:41,546 --> 00:02:43,813 ‐ Get those boots off, daddy. ‐ Sure. 66 00:02:44,946 --> 00:02:46,446 [knock on door] 67 00:02:48,180 --> 00:02:50,146 Oh, don't worry, baby. 68 00:02:50,213 --> 00:02:52,546 ‐ I'll get rid of them. ‐ Okay. 69 00:02:52,613 --> 00:02:53,880 ‐ Stay right there. ‐ Okay. 70 00:02:55,546 --> 00:02:57,280 Oh, Lord, Uncle Tibby. 71 00:02:57,346 --> 00:02:59,246 Watch out there now! 72 00:02:59,313 --> 00:03:00,820 How's my number one nephew? 73 00:03:00,886 --> 00:03:02,186 [laughing] 74 00:03:02,253 --> 00:03:04,153 What they do, they kick you out of Cleveland? 75 00:03:04,220 --> 00:03:07,086 Ah, you know I can't stay cooped up too long. 76 00:03:07,153 --> 00:03:08,833 Every twelve years, I got to get out, and.. 77 00:03:08,857 --> 00:03:11,123 Hey! Strut my stuff. 78 00:03:13,553 --> 00:03:16,253 Now, I was gonna go to New Orleans to that Mardi Gras 79 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:17,640 but you know, I don't look as good 80 00:03:17,664 --> 00:03:20,153 in a feathered mask as I used to. 81 00:03:20,220 --> 00:03:22,920 Now that real sunshine must be Synclaire. 82 00:03:22,986 --> 00:03:25,786 Oh... what an honor it is to meet you. 83 00:03:25,853 --> 00:03:28,253 I feel like you've been Overton's uncle all my life. 84 00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:29,253 Come here! 85 00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:30,353 [laughing] 86 00:03:30,420 --> 00:03:31,620 Okay, I get it. 87 00:03:31,686 --> 00:03:32,820 You, you happy to see me. 88 00:03:32,886 --> 00:03:33,920 [laughing] 89 00:03:33,986 --> 00:03:35,120 ‐ Sit down, sit down. ‐ Ohh. 90 00:03:35,186 --> 00:03:37,953 Oh, girl, this man was like a second father to me. 91 00:03:38,020 --> 00:03:39,086 Taught me everything. 92 00:03:39,153 --> 00:03:41,386 Right from wrong, up from down. 93 00:03:41,453 --> 00:03:43,520 Church girls from party girls. 94 00:03:43,586 --> 00:03:45,226 You know, my friends have got to meet you. 95 00:03:45,250 --> 00:03:46,053 Mm.. 96 00:03:46,120 --> 00:03:47,320 Go ahead and put your dogs up. 97 00:03:47,344 --> 00:03:49,286 ‐ Yeah, I'm tired. ‐ Umm. 98 00:03:49,353 --> 00:03:50,953 Uncle Tibby's here! 99 00:03:52,220 --> 00:03:54,153 You know, the Uncle Tibby from 100 00:03:54,220 --> 00:03:56,420 all of Overton's Uncle Tibby stories. 101 00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:59,020 Oh, and he's just so huggable. 102 00:03:59,086 --> 00:04:00,353 ‐ Come on up, huh? ‐ Well.. 103 00:04:00,420 --> 00:04:02,426 You just a 24‐hour cup of coffee, ain't you? 104 00:04:02,493 --> 00:04:04,960 [all laughing] 105 00:04:06,493 --> 00:04:07,793 Ey, where's Aunt Bertha at? 106 00:04:07,860 --> 00:04:09,493 Ey, you know I can't get that 107 00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:10,826 Sunday school teachin' 108 00:04:10,893 --> 00:04:13,426 bourbon hidin', pie bakin' woman out of Ohio. 109 00:04:13,493 --> 00:04:14,926 [knock on door] 110 00:04:18,126 --> 00:04:19,926 Where is he, where.. Ohh.. 111 00:04:19,993 --> 00:04:22,793 Uncle Tibby, this is Regine and Maxine. 112 00:04:22,860 --> 00:04:25,560 Lord, the room is overflowing with beauty! 113 00:04:25,626 --> 00:04:26,560 [laughing] 114 00:04:26,626 --> 00:04:27,893 Now, Uncle Tibby 115 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:31,026 it's not fair for you to focus all your attention on me. 116 00:04:31,093 --> 00:04:32,493 [laughs] 117 00:04:32,560 --> 00:04:33,680 Especially, if you just ate. 118 00:04:33,704 --> 00:04:35,959 [laughing] 119 00:04:36,026 --> 00:04:39,293 Ladies, this is the godfather of the whole Jones clan. 120 00:04:39,359 --> 00:04:41,793 Nobody made a move without Uncle Tibby's blessing. 121 00:04:41,860 --> 00:04:43,226 Oh, he's exaggerating.. 122 00:04:43,293 --> 00:04:45,593 Did I tell you I got Cousin Bumpy to come back to church? 123 00:04:45,660 --> 00:04:48,193 Get out! Cousin Bumpy was a straight‐up heathen! 124 00:04:49,460 --> 00:04:51,226 Woo! Hey, people. 125 00:04:55,926 --> 00:04:57,226 Uncle Tibby? 126 00:04:57,993 --> 00:04:59,126 Lumpy! 127 00:04:59,193 --> 00:05:00,266 [laughing] 128 00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:01,466 ‐ "Lumpy?" ‐ "Lumpy?" 129 00:05:01,533 --> 00:05:02,533 "Lumpy?" 130 00:05:02,600 --> 00:05:04,333 I had a little baby fat when I was young. 131 00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:06,066 A little, when he walked down the street 132 00:05:06,133 --> 00:05:07,666 he sounded like a marching band. 133 00:05:07,733 --> 00:05:10,300 Flapitty, flapitty, flap‐flap. 134 00:05:10,366 --> 00:05:12,933 See, that is the kind of torment that can scar a child for life. 135 00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:16,266 [chuckles] No, it was them corduroy pants that scarred him for life. 136 00:05:16,333 --> 00:05:17,833 [laughing] 137 00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:19,600 [indistinct] 138 00:05:20,866 --> 00:05:23,333 Oh, Uncle Tibby, you're so funny. 139 00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:24,442 Every time you say something like that 140 00:05:24,466 --> 00:05:26,100 it just make me want to squeeze you. 141 00:05:26,166 --> 00:05:27,233 Say somethin' else. 142 00:05:27,300 --> 00:05:29,433 You ever considered pro‐wrestling? 143 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:34,633 ♪ Granny they're expecting you ♪ 144 00:05:34,700 --> 00:05:37,033 ♪ You're a little late so come right this way ♪ 145 00:05:38,666 --> 00:05:41,366 ♪ What say it now yes say it now yeah ♪ 146 00:05:42,833 --> 00:05:45,000 Oh, no, girl, you doin' it all wrong. 147 00:05:45,066 --> 00:05:48,066 You need less bounce and more bob. 148 00:05:48,133 --> 00:05:49,733 ♪ In the world.. ♪ 149 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:53,300 ‐ Hey‐hey. ‐ Hey, look, Khadijah. 150 00:05:53,366 --> 00:05:55,200 It's Lumpy. 151 00:05:55,266 --> 00:05:57,266 Lumpy. 152 00:05:57,333 --> 00:05:58,933 You just couldn't let that go, could you? 153 00:05:58,957 --> 00:06:00,066 No! 154 00:06:00,133 --> 00:06:02,140 Hell, no, we're gonna be working that one through 155 00:06:02,206 --> 00:06:05,306 to the next century... Lumpster. 156 00:06:05,373 --> 00:06:07,306 Oh, Lumpster. Okay, okay. 157 00:06:07,373 --> 00:06:08,706 Hey. 158 00:06:08,773 --> 00:06:10,073 Is this the alleged bracelet 159 00:06:10,140 --> 00:06:12,573 that you bought for your mama with Max's name on it. 160 00:06:14,006 --> 00:06:16,506 Yeah, isn't that like I told Max. 161 00:06:19,740 --> 00:06:21,660 Yeah, I‐I actually don't know what to do with it. 162 00:06:21,684 --> 00:06:23,840 You know, I can't take it back, it's already engraved. 163 00:06:23,906 --> 00:06:27,406 Well, sweety, maybe you'll meet somebody else named Max. 164 00:06:28,973 --> 00:06:31,540 God couldn't possibly hate me that much. 165 00:06:32,973 --> 00:06:34,773 Why don't you just give it to her and move on? 166 00:06:34,806 --> 00:06:35,940 Oh, yeah. 167 00:06:36,006 --> 00:06:38,306 And then every time she looks at it 168 00:06:38,373 --> 00:06:41,440 she'll think of what a great guy she lost. 169 00:06:41,506 --> 00:06:42,840 And this will torment her. 170 00:06:42,906 --> 00:06:45,340 Forcing her to move to another time zone. 171 00:06:46,273 --> 00:06:47,873 I like that. 172 00:06:48,973 --> 00:06:50,606 Excuse me, uh, would you sorcerers 173 00:06:50,673 --> 00:06:52,373 like anything from the market? 174 00:06:52,440 --> 00:06:53,706 Chickens' feet? 175 00:06:53,773 --> 00:06:55,573 Eye of newts? 176 00:06:57,673 --> 00:07:01,046 You know what, Kyle? Man, I just can't picture you fat. 177 00:07:01,113 --> 00:07:03,180 I mean, coke bottle glasses 178 00:07:03,246 --> 00:07:06,246 acne‐ridden, braces, sure, but fat, no. 179 00:07:06,313 --> 00:07:08,780 For the record, I was not fat. 180 00:07:08,846 --> 00:07:10,446 I was husky. 181 00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:14,380 Oh, Regine. 182 00:07:14,446 --> 00:07:16,613 Who threw up on the couch? Ugh. 183 00:07:17,846 --> 00:07:20,580 Well, if it isn't Frances, the talking mule. 184 00:07:24,846 --> 00:07:26,780 Uh, look.. Get‐get off me. 185 00:07:28,313 --> 00:07:29,793 I have something that's gonna make you 186 00:07:29,817 --> 00:07:32,684 the envy of all the other barnyard animals, here. 187 00:07:34,413 --> 00:07:37,413 I got that before the demise of whatever it was that we had. 188 00:07:37,480 --> 00:07:40,046 Now, look, I know this is painful for you. 189 00:07:40,113 --> 00:07:41,446 But if you just take a moment‐‐. 190 00:07:41,513 --> 00:07:43,780 Oh, God. Max, open up the freaking gift. 191 00:07:50,180 --> 00:07:52,013 Read the inscription. 192 00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:55,946 "Always on my mind, Kyle." 193 00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:01,620 Doesn't Willie Nelson have enough problems 194 00:08:01,644 --> 00:08:03,278 without you tryin' to steal his lyrics? 195 00:08:06,453 --> 00:08:07,720 Enjoy. 196 00:08:13,486 --> 00:08:18,053 You know, if a human being had that look on her face 197 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:20,053 I'd say it was regret. 198 00:08:21,453 --> 00:08:22,986 ‐ Mmm. ‐ Can I have that box? 199 00:08:30,253 --> 00:08:31,853 It's all yours. 200 00:08:36,953 --> 00:08:38,553 ♪ Woo woo ♪ 201 00:08:38,620 --> 00:08:41,053 ♪ They say that I won't last too long ♪ 202 00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:42,820 ♪ On Broadway ♪ 203 00:08:42,886 --> 00:08:44,720 ♪ On Broadway ♪ 204 00:08:44,786 --> 00:08:46,586 ♪ I'll take a Greyhound bus ♪ 205 00:08:46,653 --> 00:08:49,020 ♪ For home they all say ♪ 206 00:08:49,086 --> 00:08:50,953 Stop. Tibby time! 207 00:08:52,153 --> 00:08:54,620 ‐ Come on. ‐ No, thank you. 208 00:08:54,686 --> 00:08:57,886 Seven choruses on the subway was quite enough. 209 00:08:57,953 --> 00:08:58,986 [sighs] 210 00:08:59,053 --> 00:09:01,693 Man, wasn't the subway great today? 211 00:09:01,760 --> 00:09:03,720 Who would have thought that we would have seen a.. 212 00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:06,360 A pickpocket, a one‐armed juggler 213 00:09:06,426 --> 00:09:09,660 and a tap dancing transvestite all in one car, huh? 214 00:09:12,293 --> 00:09:14,526 You could find the bright side of roadkill. 215 00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:19,860 Food for vultures. 216 00:09:19,926 --> 00:09:21,693 Well, I'm gonna take a bath, you know. 217 00:09:21,760 --> 00:09:23,640 If I don't get some of this New York dirt off me 218 00:09:23,664 --> 00:09:25,597 somebody gonna write "Wash me" on my butt. 219 00:09:26,493 --> 00:09:28,626 You know what, I have some bath gel 220 00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:31,226 that will leave you smellin' like firewood 221 00:09:31,293 --> 00:09:33,093 burning on a crisp winter night. 222 00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:34,893 Yeah, if, uh, smelling like a chimney sweep 223 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:36,426 don't relax me, nothing else will. 224 00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:38,060 Alright, I'm gonna get.. 225 00:09:38,126 --> 00:09:39,426 Yeah. 226 00:09:39,493 --> 00:09:41,173 You know, I'm really glad you're here, man. 227 00:09:41,197 --> 00:09:43,693 Yeah, me too. You done well for yourself. 228 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:45,926 Nice home, nice job. 229 00:09:45,993 --> 00:09:48,426 And you keepin Lumpy off sweets. 230 00:09:48,493 --> 00:09:50,026 Well, you were the one that talked me 231 00:09:50,093 --> 00:09:51,393 out of moving back to Cleveland 232 00:09:51,460 --> 00:09:53,860 when I got homesick my second day here. 233 00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:56,626 I'll never forget your wise and insightful words. 234 00:09:57,626 --> 00:09:58,660 "Stay." 235 00:10:00,060 --> 00:10:01,433 Hey, I never steered you wrong. 236 00:10:01,500 --> 00:10:03,366 Yeah, and if I hadn't I never would've met 237 00:10:03,433 --> 00:10:05,666 my sweet lollipop, Synclaire. 238 00:10:05,733 --> 00:10:08,266 ‐ 'Overton, about Synclaire.' ‐ 'Yes, sir.' 239 00:10:08,333 --> 00:10:10,700 You need to dump her. 240 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:21,566 Dump Synclaire? 241 00:10:21,633 --> 00:10:24,633 Yeah, if I let you carry on with that bippity‐boppity girl 242 00:10:24,700 --> 00:10:27,333 the whole Jones clan will put a foot in me so deep 243 00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:29,000 I'd be tasting shoe polish. 244 00:10:30,466 --> 00:10:32,366 Bippity‐boppity.. What you talking about? 245 00:10:32,433 --> 00:10:35,133 Look, a‐a‐anybody that happy, all the time 246 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:39,100 is either high on corn whiskey or she hiding something. 247 00:10:39,166 --> 00:10:41,100 Uh, Synclaire is like a open book. 248 00:10:41,166 --> 00:10:42,633 As far as getting high is concerned 249 00:10:42,700 --> 00:10:44,833 the girl get woozy taking communion. 250 00:10:47,066 --> 00:10:48,666 She trying to get her hooks in you. 251 00:10:48,733 --> 00:10:51,533 Here you are, a handyman from Ohio 252 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:53,833 you're maintaining a brownstone in Brooklyn. 253 00:10:53,900 --> 00:10:55,833 She knows gold when it glitters. 254 00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:00,306 Yeah, but she sees more in me than just the glamor. 255 00:11:00,373 --> 00:11:01,740 And what's all this fool business 256 00:11:01,806 --> 00:11:03,173 about her wantin' to be an actress? 257 00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:04,606 A‐alright, ho‐ho‐hold on now. 258 00:11:04,673 --> 00:11:05,773 You can't come in my house 259 00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:08,406 talking about my woman like that, okay? 260 00:11:08,473 --> 00:11:10,573 Now, I know you wouldn't be getting salty 261 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:12,106 with your favorite uncle. 262 00:11:12,173 --> 00:11:14,173 Unless I struck a nerve. 263 00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:15,473 Which proves I'm right. 264 00:11:15,540 --> 00:11:17,306 See, you need to cool down. 265 00:11:17,373 --> 00:11:19,073 Let your good sense seep in. 266 00:11:19,140 --> 00:11:20,806 I'mma go get in the tub. 267 00:11:20,873 --> 00:11:23,306 Hey, hold on. We're not finished with this yet. 268 00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:26,806 You're not letting it seep in. 269 00:11:26,873 --> 00:11:28,406 Do your uncle a favor. 270 00:11:28,473 --> 00:11:30,906 Get me some Lemon Joy for my bath 271 00:11:30,973 --> 00:11:33,606 and, uh, some Vaseline for the rusty spots, okay? 272 00:11:45,873 --> 00:11:47,353 Synclaire, you're pouring orange juice 273 00:11:47,419 --> 00:11:48,353 into the mashed potatoes. 274 00:11:48,419 --> 00:11:49,419 Oh. Oh. Oh. 275 00:11:51,506 --> 00:11:54,140 Hmm, the citrus adds a zip you just can't get with milk. 276 00:11:54,206 --> 00:11:55,640 I think you're onto something there. 277 00:11:56,740 --> 00:11:59,040 Honey, what's wrong? 278 00:11:59,106 --> 00:12:02,813 I overheard Uncle Tibby tell Overton to cut me loose. 279 00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:04,113 W‐why would he say that? 280 00:12:04,180 --> 00:12:07,513 I don't know. He even called me "bippity‐boppity." 281 00:12:07,580 --> 00:12:09,313 That's amazing, who knew there was a word 282 00:12:09,380 --> 00:12:10,780 that so perfectly describes you. 283 00:12:12,346 --> 00:12:14,446 I tried so hard to impress that man. 284 00:12:14,513 --> 00:12:16,580 I even baked him cookies. 285 00:12:16,646 --> 00:12:18,580 Well, mistake number one. 286 00:12:21,146 --> 00:12:22,913 Do you understand, that that man 287 00:12:22,980 --> 00:12:25,613 is the Grand Poobah of Overton's family. 288 00:12:25,680 --> 00:12:29,646 If he doesn't like me, I will never be Synclaire James‐Jones. 289 00:12:29,713 --> 00:12:31,813 Well, look, Synclaire, being disliked is often a sign 290 00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:33,560 that you're strong, that you have character 291 00:12:33,584 --> 00:12:35,346 and that people respect you. 292 00:12:35,413 --> 00:12:37,113 Or that you're a hag people put up with 293 00:12:37,180 --> 00:12:38,680 because Khadijah insists on dragging 294 00:12:38,746 --> 00:12:41,346 your behind around with her. 295 00:12:41,413 --> 00:12:44,046 Oh. Now, don't be so hard on yourself. 296 00:12:46,380 --> 00:12:48,546 Synclaire, I say you go talk to Overton. 297 00:12:48,613 --> 00:12:50,613 I mean, if there's one thing I know there's nothing 298 00:12:50,637 --> 00:12:52,937 anyone can say that'll shake his love for you. 299 00:12:54,013 --> 00:12:56,080 Unless you tell him about when you used to eat dirt 300 00:12:56,146 --> 00:12:58,113 when you were seven.. 301 00:13:00,853 --> 00:13:03,720 Hello, Lumpy. Lumpy, Lumpy, Lumpy. 302 00:13:06,020 --> 00:13:08,620 Is there no safe haven for me anywhere? 303 00:13:08,686 --> 00:13:12,553 Down here, The hound from the hell. 304 00:13:12,620 --> 00:13:16,486 Upstairs, Uncle Fish Fry. 305 00:13:16,553 --> 00:13:18,353 Unless, of course, he's down at the schoolyard 306 00:13:18,377 --> 00:13:21,086 making fun of the husky children. 307 00:13:21,153 --> 00:13:22,753 Sorry, he's upstairs taking a bath 308 00:13:22,820 --> 00:13:25,286 stewing in his own meanness. 309 00:13:25,353 --> 00:13:27,353 If you're lucky, he's using your washcloth. 310 00:13:29,186 --> 00:13:31,720 Hmm, so I see you're not wearing your bracelet. 311 00:13:31,786 --> 00:13:33,653 I guess it takes some people a little longer 312 00:13:33,720 --> 00:13:35,353 to move on than others, huh? 313 00:13:35,420 --> 00:13:37,820 Yeah. I moved on, alright. 314 00:13:39,153 --> 00:13:40,820 I hocked your bracelet.. 315 00:13:40,886 --> 00:13:43,220 Used the money to buy these. 316 00:13:43,286 --> 00:13:47,120 One hundred percent full croc demi‐ankle boots. 317 00:13:48,953 --> 00:13:51,253 You hocked a $400 bracelet 318 00:13:51,320 --> 00:13:53,286 for a pair of fake crocodile road stompers? 319 00:13:53,353 --> 00:13:54,553 No, no, no, wait, wait, wait. 320 00:13:54,620 --> 00:13:56,460 Before you two come to blows, give me some time 321 00:13:56,484 --> 00:13:58,418 to just pop some popcorn. 322 00:13:59,653 --> 00:14:01,293 You spent that much money on me? 323 00:14:03,026 --> 00:14:04,926 I must have really rocked your world. 324 00:14:09,560 --> 00:14:11,093 No! Wait! Kyle! Come on! Ey.. 325 00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:13,393 The‐the‐the bag hasn't even puffed yet. 326 00:14:19,360 --> 00:14:20,360 [knock on door] 327 00:14:22,393 --> 00:14:25,560 Hi, Obie. Um, where's Uncle Tibby? 328 00:14:25,626 --> 00:14:27,693 Oh, knocked out back in the bedroom. 329 00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:30,926 He said he that, uh, Lemon Joy and fried baloney sandwiches 330 00:14:30,993 --> 00:14:32,960 is like one big sleeping pill. 331 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:37,493 I heard what he said. I was standing right outside the door. 332 00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:39,660 Damn. I'm sorry, baby. 333 00:14:39,726 --> 00:14:41,493 'Cause he had no right to say those things. 334 00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:43,293 But I tell you what, as soon as he wakes up 335 00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:44,920 I'm telling him to pack up that Vaseline 336 00:14:44,944 --> 00:14:46,578 and just slide on outta here. 337 00:14:48,526 --> 00:14:51,060 Obie, you can't. 338 00:14:51,126 --> 00:14:52,560 Then I'd be known as the trollop 339 00:14:52,626 --> 00:14:55,460 who drove a wedge between you and your favorite uncle. 340 00:14:55,526 --> 00:14:57,360 And‐and‐and your resentment would grow 341 00:14:57,426 --> 00:15:00,400 and one day you'll be taking a blowtorch to my trolls 342 00:15:00,466 --> 00:15:02,333 and you won't even know why. 343 00:15:03,700 --> 00:15:06,400 Yeah, it's kind of hard to argue with that logic. 344 00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,000 But I know that if he got a chance to know you 345 00:15:10,066 --> 00:15:12,033 he'd love you just like I do. 346 00:15:12,766 --> 00:15:14,033 Hey, check this out. 347 00:15:14,100 --> 00:15:16,833 How about tomorrow, I'll cook us up a real nice dinner? 348 00:15:16,900 --> 00:15:18,166 That could work. 349 00:15:18,233 --> 00:15:19,593 Yeah, you give me a couple of hours 350 00:15:19,633 --> 00:15:22,366 and you two will be closer than a tick on a porch dog. 351 00:15:23,966 --> 00:15:25,666 ‐ I hope so. ‐ Yeah. 352 00:15:25,733 --> 00:15:27,333 'Cause, hey, if it comes down to a choice 353 00:15:27,357 --> 00:15:28,733 between you and Uncle Tibby 354 00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:30,600 I'd just have to get used to my favorite uncle 355 00:15:30,624 --> 00:15:32,300 not being in my life. 356 00:15:32,366 --> 00:15:34,300 It'd just be you and me. 357 00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:37,933 And Uncle Jelly. 358 00:15:39,366 --> 00:15:41,600 Aunt Fanny. 359 00:15:41,666 --> 00:15:43,700 Cousin Slats. 360 00:15:43,766 --> 00:15:46,700 Great Uncle Schmoke‐eye. 361 00:15:46,766 --> 00:15:48,866 And of course, Bob. 362 00:15:53,633 --> 00:15:54,833 [glass shatters] 363 00:15:56,166 --> 00:15:58,866 Golf? What, your life not boring enough already? 364 00:16:00,140 --> 00:16:02,273 ‐ Hey, Regine. ‐ 'Hey.' 365 00:16:02,340 --> 00:16:03,340 Bootzilla. 366 00:16:09,673 --> 00:16:11,673 I was wondering if I could get that Robere's box 367 00:16:11,740 --> 00:16:14,240 I wanna put this silver bracelet back in it. 368 00:16:14,306 --> 00:16:16,940 Well, actually, Bootzilla crushed it. 369 00:16:17,006 --> 00:16:20,206 But I'm sure we have something that will 370 00:16:20,273 --> 00:16:22,140 work just as well, let's see. 371 00:16:22,206 --> 00:16:24,306 We got.. Oh! Cartier. 372 00:16:24,373 --> 00:16:26,306 Van Cleef and Arpels. 373 00:16:27,506 --> 00:16:30,940 Miracle mart? Khadijah. 374 00:16:31,006 --> 00:16:33,973 Oh, poor little turned‐out Kyle. 375 00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:36,040 You still aren't over me yet. Oh.. 376 00:16:36,106 --> 00:16:37,340 [Kyle chuckles] 377 00:16:37,406 --> 00:16:39,706 Well, actually the druggist had a spray for that. 378 00:16:41,573 --> 00:16:43,740 And while I was down there getting this out of hock 379 00:16:43,806 --> 00:16:46,406 I met a woman who was pawning her engagement ring. 380 00:16:46,473 --> 00:16:48,506 We set up a date and if all goes according to plan 381 00:16:48,573 --> 00:16:50,733 in a couple of weeks, I'll be seeing her wearing this.. 382 00:16:50,757 --> 00:16:51,673 [chuckles] 383 00:16:51,740 --> 00:16:53,340 And nothing else. 384 00:16:54,440 --> 00:16:56,273 That's a pretty pathetic woman 385 00:16:56,340 --> 00:16:59,206 who'll accept a gift with someone else's name on it. 386 00:16:59,273 --> 00:17:01,846 Well, actually the engraving works to my benefit. 387 00:17:01,913 --> 00:17:04,153 You see, she is the owner of the state of the art theatre 388 00:17:04,180 --> 00:17:05,680 down on 57th Street. 389 00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:09,713 Not the Imax theatre? 390 00:17:09,780 --> 00:17:12,913 ‐ One and the same. ‐ Oh! Ha‐ha! 391 00:17:14,480 --> 00:17:16,913 One downwards stroke of the engraver's pin. 392 00:17:18,113 --> 00:17:19,613 And I'm back in the saddle. Psst. 393 00:17:19,680 --> 00:17:21,280 Giddyup, baby. 394 00:17:26,780 --> 00:17:27,913 [knock on door] 395 00:17:36,646 --> 00:17:39,780 Ooh. Girl, you look stunning. 396 00:17:39,846 --> 00:17:41,313 Well, I aim to please 397 00:17:41,380 --> 00:17:43,180 although I can't seem to please everybody. 398 00:17:43,246 --> 00:17:44,780 Mm‐hmm. 399 00:17:44,846 --> 00:17:48,046 Is that neck bones and rice I smell? 400 00:17:48,113 --> 00:17:50,080 Synclaire, you shouldn't have. 401 00:17:50,146 --> 00:17:52,680 Actually, I didn't, Overton made it. 402 00:17:52,746 --> 00:17:56,313 Oh! Is this one of those liberated relationships? 403 00:17:56,380 --> 00:17:57,946 Something wrong with that? 404 00:17:58,013 --> 00:17:59,553 O‐O‐Obie, Obie aren't those neck bones 405 00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:01,020 jumping out of that pot? 406 00:18:01,086 --> 00:18:02,686 Oh, yeah, yeah. You're right. 407 00:18:02,753 --> 00:18:04,993 Uh, Synclaire, why don't you tell him about how important 408 00:18:05,017 --> 00:18:06,453 your job is down at Flavor? 409 00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:08,120 You got a paying job? 410 00:18:10,553 --> 00:18:13,920 Actually, I'm an office manager at a major magazine. 411 00:18:13,986 --> 00:18:15,720 Some would say that I'm the nerve center 412 00:18:15,786 --> 00:18:18,020 of the entire operation. 413 00:18:18,086 --> 00:18:20,353 Oh, really? How'd you get a job like that? 414 00:18:21,686 --> 00:18:22,953 [chuckles] 415 00:18:23,020 --> 00:18:25,520 Well, my cousin, Khadijah, needed someone. 416 00:18:25,586 --> 00:18:26,986 I was the perfect choice. 417 00:18:27,053 --> 00:18:28,386 Mm‐hmm. 418 00:18:28,453 --> 00:18:30,420 Who needs a resume when you got a cousin. 419 00:18:30,486 --> 00:18:33,553 Oh, no, she didn't need a family to get her acting jobs, now. 420 00:18:33,620 --> 00:18:35,020 Listen, let me tell you. The‐the.. 421 00:18:35,086 --> 00:18:37,720 The infomercial where I get fired. 422 00:18:37,786 --> 00:18:39,620 The play where I was naked. 423 00:18:39,686 --> 00:18:40,853 All me! 424 00:18:40,920 --> 00:18:42,120 Naked? 425 00:18:42,186 --> 00:18:45,086 Oh, next on. Now you wanna say grace, Uncle Tib? 426 00:18:45,153 --> 00:18:47,520 Yeah, I, I'm gonna pray she don't take her clothes off. 427 00:18:49,853 --> 00:18:51,486 Okay, that's it. 428 00:18:51,553 --> 00:18:52,920 Uncle Tibby, I, I mean 429 00:18:52,986 --> 00:18:56,153 this in the most respectful way possible. 430 00:18:56,220 --> 00:18:58,153 Get up out my house. 431 00:19:04,360 --> 00:19:06,293 All this food and we goin' out? 432 00:19:07,826 --> 00:19:09,226 No, you goin' out. 433 00:19:09,293 --> 00:19:12,793 You can't come in here talkin' about the woman that I love. 434 00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:15,493 Man, she's the best thing that ever happened to me. 435 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:17,093 And if you can't get with that 436 00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:19,526 you ought to take them neck bones to go. 437 00:19:23,260 --> 00:19:24,793 I can't go home. 438 00:19:25,460 --> 00:19:27,393 What d'you mean? 439 00:19:27,460 --> 00:19:29,393 I had a fight with your Aunt Bertha. 440 00:19:33,026 --> 00:19:35,060 I went to see her Sunday School youth choir 441 00:19:35,126 --> 00:19:37,660 and I told her they sounded like a bunch of hyenas giving birth. 442 00:19:40,126 --> 00:19:42,326 Next thing I know, I'm on a bus headed east. 443 00:19:43,460 --> 00:19:44,726 Damn woman. 444 00:19:46,460 --> 00:19:48,226 I miss her. 445 00:19:48,293 --> 00:19:50,593 Well, why don't you just call her and apologize? 446 00:19:50,660 --> 00:19:53,193 Yes, and everything will be all peachy again. 447 00:19:53,260 --> 00:19:54,860 Huh, peachy. 448 00:19:54,926 --> 00:19:56,960 Bertha says peachy. 449 00:19:57,026 --> 00:19:59,693 You got a lot of Bertha in you, girl. 450 00:19:59,760 --> 00:20:01,709 ‐ I'm gonna call Aunt Birdy‐‐ ‐ Hold on, hold on, now. 451 00:20:01,733 --> 00:20:03,453 I don't know how to apologize to that woman. 452 00:20:03,520 --> 00:20:05,520 Well, I'll tell you what, you can start practicing 453 00:20:05,586 --> 00:20:07,400 on somebody in this room. 454 00:20:13,900 --> 00:20:15,833 I'm sorry I was a little harsh. 455 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,466 Guess you remind me so much of Bertha 456 00:20:18,533 --> 00:20:21,433 I took my blues out on you. 457 00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:24,500 Oh, you were going through a tough time. 458 00:20:24,566 --> 00:20:28,166 ♪ Woo woo woo woo woo woo ♪ 459 00:20:28,233 --> 00:20:29,733 Does Bertha do that too? 460 00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:30,800 Hell, no. 461 00:20:32,700 --> 00:20:34,466 Hey, Aunt Birdy‐bird, it's Obie. 462 00:20:34,533 --> 00:20:36,800 Hey.. Hey, you got it. 463 00:20:40,933 --> 00:20:42,200 Hey, Bertha. 464 00:20:43,700 --> 00:20:45,366 Ti‐Tiberius here. 465 00:20:47,233 --> 00:20:48,833 Uh, I'm, I'm sorry, honey. 466 00:20:48,900 --> 00:20:51,066 I'd like to come home. 467 00:20:51,133 --> 00:20:53,700 I didn't mean what I said about the children. 468 00:20:53,766 --> 00:20:55,166 (Tiberius) 'They sound like angels.' 469 00:20:56,133 --> 00:20:57,733 Tone‐deaf angels. 470 00:20:58,966 --> 00:21:01,173 Ber‐Bertha! Bertha! 471 00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:02,240 Damn! 472 00:21:04,173 --> 00:21:06,073 Look, uh, I'm gonna need a couple of nights here 473 00:21:06,140 --> 00:21:07,906 to work on this apology thing. 474 00:21:09,106 --> 00:21:11,106 Well, that's just fine. Just fine. 475 00:21:11,173 --> 00:21:12,640 It'll give me a chance to wow you 476 00:21:12,706 --> 00:21:16,440 with my one‐woman interpretation of "A Raisin In The Sun." 477 00:21:16,506 --> 00:21:18,706 "Winnie!" 478 00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:27,073 (Synclaire) 'Come on, Uncle Tibby, come on.' 479 00:21:27,140 --> 00:21:29,106 Maybe I can call her again. 480 00:21:31,573 --> 00:21:34,106 ‐ Good looking out, mama. ‐ I got your back, daddy. 481 00:21:37,173 --> 00:21:38,653 (female narrator) We'll be right back. 482 00:21:42,473 --> 00:21:43,993 (Synclaire) 'Ooh, look, a care package' 483 00:21:44,017 --> 00:21:45,640 'from Uncle Tibby and Aunt Bertha.' 484 00:21:45,706 --> 00:21:46,806 'What does the note say?' 485 00:21:46,873 --> 00:21:48,393 (Overton) '"Dear Overton and Synclaire' 486 00:21:48,417 --> 00:21:49,773 '"hope all is well with you two.' 487 00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:51,373 '"Your Aunt Bertha and I are fine' 488 00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:53,773 '"but we're still fighting about the children's choir.' 489 00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:56,406 '"So we'd like you to decide. Angels or hyenas.' 490 00:21:56,473 --> 00:21:59,040 "‐ 'Love, Uncle Tibby." Yeah.' ‐ 'Okay.' 491 00:21:59,106 --> 00:22:01,980 [Overton hums] 492 00:22:02,046 --> 00:22:04,980 [indistinct singing] 493 00:22:06,380 --> 00:22:10,413 ♪ Hallelujah ♪ 494 00:22:10,480 --> 00:22:13,213 (Synclaire) 'I think hyenas was a compliment.' 495 00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:15,380 (Overton) 'Yep, Uncle Tibby was right all along' 496 00:22:15,446 --> 00:22:17,913 'but, only 'bout that, now.' 497 00:22:17,980 --> 00:22:20,413 'Uh, I‐let's get back to that toe thing, mama.' 498 00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:24,046 (female ♫1) Woo‐hoo! 36312

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