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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,106 --> 00:00:10,934 Do you know what today is? 2 00:00:20,141 --> 00:00:22,317 Of course I do. 3 00:00:22,360 --> 00:00:25,625 But you're so pretty when you say it, so you say it. 4 00:00:25,668 --> 00:00:28,105 No, it's just Friday, 5 00:00:28,149 --> 00:00:31,239 or, as I like to call it, "Fri-yay." 6 00:00:31,766 --> 00:00:33,241 So what do you say 7 00:00:33,284 --> 00:00:36,461 we live it up and try that new restaurant, Jalapeño Kevin's? 8 00:00:36,505 --> 00:00:37,941 Ooh, I've been wanting to go there 9 00:00:37,966 --> 00:00:40,756 because the name sounds exotic, but it has "Kevin" in it, 10 00:00:40,781 --> 00:00:42,163 so I know it won't be too spicy. 11 00:00:42,206 --> 00:00:45,773 Yeah. Yeah, remember how much we like Hong Kong Dave's? 12 00:00:45,798 --> 00:00:48,459 Mm, yeah. Ugh, but we can't. 13 00:00:48,484 --> 00:00:50,432 We have date night with Don and Marcy. 14 00:00:50,475 --> 00:00:52,086 Oh, yeah, they won't try a new place. 15 00:00:52,129 --> 00:00:53,977 - They always just want to go to Mick's. - Yeah. 16 00:00:54,001 --> 00:00:55,829 Every week, it's the same: order burgers, 17 00:00:55,872 --> 00:00:57,203 then Marcy sends hers back 18 00:00:57,228 --> 00:01:00,228 because it's too well done or not well done enough. 19 00:01:00,774 --> 00:01:01,919 It's never just right. 20 00:01:01,944 --> 00:01:03,663 She's the Goldilocks of burgers. 21 00:01:06,709 --> 00:01:10,542 Look, you know I love Don and Marcy, 22 00:01:10,567 --> 00:01:12,541 but, you know, we're kind of in a rut. 23 00:01:12,584 --> 00:01:15,412 Hey, what if we say one of the kids is sick and we cancel, 24 00:01:15,437 --> 00:01:17,918 and then we go to Jalapeño Kevin's? 25 00:01:19,958 --> 00:01:21,061 Honey, we can't do that. 26 00:01:21,086 --> 00:01:23,305 - He's my brother. We love them. - I know. 27 00:01:25,577 --> 00:01:27,709 I said we loved them before you said we loved them. 28 00:01:29,530 --> 00:01:30,908 It's just... I don't know. 29 00:01:30,933 --> 00:01:33,823 We've all been together a long time. 30 00:01:33,848 --> 00:01:36,353 Yeah. It's like a marriage. 31 00:01:39,524 --> 00:01:41,918 But not this marriage. No, no, no. 32 00:01:41,943 --> 00:01:43,525 Every moment with you is a gift. 33 00:01:43,550 --> 00:01:45,030 Uh-huh. 34 00:01:47,259 --> 00:01:49,783 - Anybody want a snack? - What do you got? 35 00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:52,269 Pocket bacon. 36 00:01:54,286 --> 00:01:56,341 What kind of bacon? 37 00:01:56,362 --> 00:01:59,060 He carries bacon everywhere in case of emergencies. 38 00:02:00,850 --> 00:02:02,547 My car runs into a snow bank, 39 00:02:02,559 --> 00:02:05,562 I can last a week with just the bacon I have on me. 40 00:02:07,346 --> 00:02:10,349 He's also been tackled by dogs four times. 41 00:02:11,426 --> 00:02:14,995 Thanks for explaining, but I was never seriously considering it. 42 00:02:15,771 --> 00:02:17,654 I've got to head out anyway. 43 00:02:17,679 --> 00:02:19,115 Oh, hot date? 44 00:02:19,140 --> 00:02:21,019 Yup. She's a mobile cat groomer. 45 00:02:21,044 --> 00:02:23,351 I met her in the Band-Aid aisle at the drugstore. 46 00:02:28,405 --> 00:02:30,179 Boy, I am glad I got married 47 00:02:30,204 --> 00:02:32,859 before I hit the cat groomer phase of being single. 48 00:02:33,807 --> 00:02:35,995 Hey, don't forget we have couples dinner tonight. 49 00:02:36,020 --> 00:02:37,213 How could I forget? 50 00:02:37,238 --> 00:02:39,430 We do couples dinner at Mick's almost every week. 51 00:02:39,454 --> 00:02:42,831 How about, next week, instead of dinner at Mick's... 52 00:02:42,856 --> 00:02:44,844 - Yeah? - We do dinner at Mick's, 53 00:02:44,869 --> 00:02:46,890 followed by a jug band concert? 54 00:02:48,741 --> 00:02:51,422 Is it just jugs? 55 00:02:51,466 --> 00:02:52,788 It's a whole band. 56 00:02:52,813 --> 00:02:55,903 There's washboards, banjos, spoons. 57 00:02:55,992 --> 00:02:59,604 So any instrument a Muppet would play? 58 00:02:59,974 --> 00:03:01,935 That's a pass. 59 00:03:02,073 --> 00:03:05,237 Okay, but this is your only chance to yell "Nice jugs" 60 00:03:05,262 --> 00:03:06,742 without getting in trouble. 61 00:03:10,079 --> 00:03:12,135 Stop what you're doing. I got great news. 62 00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:14,171 Don just called and canceled dinner. 63 00:03:14,196 --> 00:03:16,416 Marcy sprained her ankle! 64 00:03:17,167 --> 00:03:18,346 Yay! 65 00:03:18,371 --> 00:03:22,288 I mean, oh, sad for Marcy, but now it really is Fri-yay. 66 00:03:22,313 --> 00:03:25,257 Yeah. Don said she has to stay home and ice it. 67 00:03:25,282 --> 00:03:26,331 Well, then I think 68 00:03:26,356 --> 00:03:29,543 tonight is all about you, me and Jalapeño Kevin. 69 00:03:31,917 --> 00:03:34,006 The only threesome I will ever agree to. 70 00:03:35,419 --> 00:03:37,682 Eh, we'll talk after a couple margaritas. 71 00:03:40,626 --> 00:03:42,831 This place is great. My drink is blue! 72 00:03:42,856 --> 00:03:44,336 It's a blu-garita, Adam! 73 00:03:45,650 --> 00:03:48,958 And it has a gummy jalapeño in it. 74 00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:51,831 Because it's Jalapeño Kevin's. 75 00:03:51,874 --> 00:03:54,094 They got their thinking caps on in the head office. 76 00:03:57,575 --> 00:03:58,593 What's Don doing here? 77 00:03:58,618 --> 00:04:00,881 He's supposed to be home taking care of Marcy. 78 00:04:01,192 --> 00:04:04,065 Maybe he came to pick up food for her and ran into friends. 79 00:04:04,155 --> 00:04:04,999 Oh, that makes sense. 80 00:04:05,024 --> 00:04:06,306 He said she couldn't even get out of bed. 81 00:04:06,330 --> 00:04:08,428 Aw. Wait, there's Marcy. 82 00:04:08,453 --> 00:04:10,085 Olé! 83 00:04:15,021 --> 00:04:17,466 That better mean "ouch" in Spanish. 84 00:04:39,029 --> 00:04:41,467 I can't believe they ditched us! 85 00:04:41,510 --> 00:04:44,209 After we didn't ditch them. 86 00:04:44,252 --> 00:04:47,212 You know why? Because we're good people. 87 00:04:47,536 --> 00:04:48,972 It's our worst quality. 88 00:04:50,661 --> 00:04:52,715 Why didn't you let me go over there and say something? 89 00:04:52,739 --> 00:04:54,076 'Cause I didn't want you to make a scene. 90 00:04:54,100 --> 00:04:55,622 You were so mad your lips got blue. 91 00:04:57,878 --> 00:05:00,098 That was from the blu-garita. 92 00:05:00,123 --> 00:05:02,009 Oh. 93 00:05:02,428 --> 00:05:03,532 But I am mad. 94 00:05:03,576 --> 00:05:05,360 Don and Marcy cheated on us! 95 00:05:05,404 --> 00:05:06,927 I know. 96 00:05:06,970 --> 00:05:10,161 After we gave them the best years of our lives. 97 00:05:10,490 --> 00:05:12,957 Yeah. And how do they repay us? 98 00:05:12,982 --> 00:05:15,811 By olé-ing with some other couple. 99 00:05:18,263 --> 00:05:19,940 So what do we do? 100 00:05:19,983 --> 00:05:21,061 We're gonna do what I should've done 101 00:05:21,085 --> 00:05:23,936 when my first boyfriend cheated on me: talk face to face. 102 00:05:23,961 --> 00:05:25,007 Oh. 103 00:05:25,032 --> 00:05:27,643 You know, instead of just telling everybody he had crabs. 104 00:05:37,325 --> 00:05:39,264 I learn something new about you every day. 105 00:05:46,255 --> 00:05:47,620 Hey, Don. 106 00:05:47,663 --> 00:05:49,935 Still stuck at home with Marcy, huh? 107 00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:51,353 Yeah. I haven't left the house. 108 00:05:51,865 --> 00:05:55,149 Hey, remind me, how did you say Marcy hurt her ankle? 109 00:05:55,607 --> 00:05:58,435 Oh, she was playing streetball with some neighborhood toughs. 110 00:05:59,501 --> 00:06:02,287 We saw you guys at Jalapeño Kevin's. 111 00:06:02,747 --> 00:06:04,637 Hmm, I'm not aware of that establishment. 112 00:06:05,943 --> 00:06:06,902 We have evidence. 113 00:06:06,927 --> 00:06:08,684 Yeah, we took a picture of you 114 00:06:08,709 --> 00:06:10,600 eating the other half of those enchiladas. 115 00:06:10,625 --> 00:06:11,800 Here it is, 116 00:06:11,825 --> 00:06:14,212 you and Marcy with strangers. 117 00:06:14,255 --> 00:06:16,855 And they don't look like a couple of ankle doctors. 118 00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:18,259 Well, that's not us. 119 00:06:18,303 --> 00:06:21,567 - Wh... - How could that possibly not be you? 120 00:06:21,610 --> 00:06:23,569 Everyone in the world's got a look-alike. 121 00:06:23,612 --> 00:06:25,875 It's weird that Marcy's and mine are together. 122 00:06:25,919 --> 00:06:28,356 I guess we were meant to be. 123 00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:30,228 Can you believe this? 124 00:06:30,271 --> 00:06:32,012 We know you're lying. 125 00:06:32,055 --> 00:06:34,766 You're right, he is lying. 126 00:06:34,791 --> 00:06:37,452 We went out with another couple last night. 127 00:06:37,496 --> 00:06:39,846 And it felt good. 128 00:06:42,375 --> 00:06:45,247 We did things we haven't done in years. 129 00:06:45,272 --> 00:06:46,602 We don't need the details 130 00:06:46,627 --> 00:06:48,028 of your night out with the floozies. 131 00:06:48,052 --> 00:06:49,080 Yeah. 132 00:06:49,105 --> 00:06:50,919 - We couldn't care less about them. - Hmm. 133 00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:53,599 We don't care who they are or where they came from. 134 00:06:53,729 --> 00:06:56,254 So who are they and where'd they come from? 135 00:06:56,297 --> 00:06:57,864 - Tina and Trevor. - Yeah. 136 00:06:57,889 --> 00:07:00,414 We call them "TNT" 'cause they're dynamite. 137 00:07:02,573 --> 00:07:04,262 They sound stupid. 138 00:07:05,417 --> 00:07:07,874 Look, the fact is this thing 139 00:07:07,917 --> 00:07:09,397 hasn't been good for a while. 140 00:07:09,422 --> 00:07:11,206 We're all just going through the motions. 141 00:07:11,269 --> 00:07:14,315 Well, we feel the same way, but we didn't go behind your backs. 142 00:07:14,340 --> 00:07:16,709 We just talked about it behind your backs. 143 00:07:16,752 --> 00:07:21,235 If you feel the same way, I think it's time for a break. 144 00:07:21,771 --> 00:07:23,860 Wait a minute, you're breaking up with us? 145 00:07:24,029 --> 00:07:26,151 You're breaking up with us? 146 00:07:26,414 --> 00:07:28,581 You? Us? 147 00:07:29,936 --> 00:07:31,720 Unbelievable. 148 00:07:32,307 --> 00:07:34,901 We are the best thing that ever happened to you. 149 00:07:35,648 --> 00:07:37,807 Good luck with your new couple. 150 00:07:38,470 --> 00:07:40,346 I heard they have crabs. 151 00:07:45,201 --> 00:07:48,192 The only way to get over this is to get right back on the horse. 152 00:07:48,217 --> 00:07:50,741 We need to get with a new couple as soon as possible. 153 00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:53,267 They don't even have to be good-looking. 154 00:07:53,661 --> 00:07:55,922 Yeah, what we need is a rebound couple, 155 00:07:55,947 --> 00:07:58,036 - a confidence booster. - Mm-hmm. 156 00:07:58,061 --> 00:08:00,012 Right, get with someone else. 157 00:08:00,101 --> 00:08:02,103 That's what I did when I got dumped. 158 00:08:03,091 --> 00:08:05,235 "Get with"? What does that mean? 159 00:08:05,260 --> 00:08:07,610 Is that like "hook up"? What does "hook up" mean? 160 00:08:08,419 --> 00:08:09,434 Listen, 161 00:08:09,459 --> 00:08:11,607 there's a parent mixer for my class coming up. 162 00:08:11,872 --> 00:08:13,264 You should go. 163 00:08:14,723 --> 00:08:15,767 That's a great idea. 164 00:08:15,792 --> 00:08:16,880 - What? - What? 165 00:08:17,052 --> 00:08:18,882 Those things are full of people so lonely 166 00:08:18,907 --> 00:08:20,517 they'll go to a parents mixer. 167 00:08:21,558 --> 00:08:23,125 We're gonna clean up. 168 00:08:23,969 --> 00:08:26,284 All right, let's get out there, 169 00:08:26,309 --> 00:08:29,007 put our beer goggles on and see who we come home with. 170 00:08:33,829 --> 00:08:35,744 I'm a little nervous. 171 00:08:35,788 --> 00:08:37,473 Babe, we have no reason to be. 172 00:08:37,498 --> 00:08:40,238 Don and Marcy don't know what they lost, okay? 173 00:08:40,263 --> 00:08:42,574 We're Willy Wonka and these people just got golden tickets. 174 00:08:43,668 --> 00:08:45,061 But we don't know anybody here. 175 00:08:45,086 --> 00:08:48,264 Well, I know that guy. His name's Bob. Hey, Bob! 176 00:08:48,289 --> 00:08:49,862 I-I-I think his name is Jim. 177 00:08:49,887 --> 00:08:51,976 Hey, Jim, you seen Bob? 178 00:08:52,346 --> 00:08:54,720 You know, I think we might be a little rusty at this. 179 00:08:54,763 --> 00:08:55,851 Come on. 180 00:08:55,876 --> 00:08:57,940 This place is full of lonely couples. 181 00:08:57,965 --> 00:08:59,246 It's a real meat market. 182 00:08:59,746 --> 00:09:02,118 Okay, well, take a seat 183 00:09:02,162 --> 00:09:04,242 - and let's do a little window shopping. - All right. 184 00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:08,647 Hey. 185 00:09:08,672 --> 00:09:10,316 How about those guys? 186 00:09:10,341 --> 00:09:14,258 No, nope. Not talking to a guy who wears flip-flops after dark. 187 00:09:15,212 --> 00:09:17,005 Let's keep looking. 188 00:09:19,826 --> 00:09:21,240 Adam! 189 00:09:21,265 --> 00:09:23,083 I'm-I'm too strong. 190 00:09:23,108 --> 00:09:25,536 S-Stick those back in there. 191 00:09:27,204 --> 00:09:28,640 Welcome to our home. 192 00:09:28,665 --> 00:09:30,843 Ah, I see you found our favorite chair. 193 00:09:31,208 --> 00:09:33,357 It's their favorite chair, Adam. 194 00:09:33,382 --> 00:09:35,253 Right, I can see why. 195 00:09:35,278 --> 00:09:37,889 In fact, I think I might just sit in this thing all night, 196 00:09:38,042 --> 00:09:40,610 maybe even until you go up to bed. 197 00:09:41,122 --> 00:09:42,780 It was the last thing my grandfather made 198 00:09:42,797 --> 00:09:44,277 before he passed away. 199 00:09:44,321 --> 00:09:46,540 Dead grandpa's homemade chair, Adam. 200 00:09:48,389 --> 00:09:50,000 Is that guy stealing your silverware? 201 00:09:56,085 --> 00:09:58,509 My bad. He-He's just eating. 202 00:09:59,121 --> 00:10:01,117 Nice to meet you. I'm Wally. 203 00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:08,261 Adam. 204 00:10:11,913 --> 00:10:14,307 I think your grandpa would want you to have this. 205 00:10:16,570 --> 00:10:19,225 That was a long, quiet walk to the front door. 206 00:10:22,299 --> 00:10:25,266 Lot of pictures of that grandfather, too, I noticed. 207 00:10:26,936 --> 00:10:28,764 You know what the worst part is? 208 00:10:28,797 --> 00:10:30,556 I can't tell Don the story. 209 00:10:30,581 --> 00:10:32,767 He hates antiques, he loves breaking things. 210 00:10:32,823 --> 00:10:34,283 It's perfect for him. 211 00:10:35,315 --> 00:10:37,697 Yeah, they would've thought it was funny. 212 00:10:37,722 --> 00:10:39,594 And then we would've thought it was funny. 213 00:10:39,774 --> 00:10:42,385 - There's no substitute for best friends. - Mm. 214 00:10:42,410 --> 00:10:44,368 Although, these do help. 215 00:10:46,818 --> 00:10:49,308 Oh, no, there's Don and Marcy! 216 00:10:49,333 --> 00:10:50,996 With their trashy new couple. 217 00:10:51,039 --> 00:10:54,478 Look how young they are... what a cliché. 218 00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:56,480 Hey, guys. I'd like you to meet our friends, 219 00:10:56,523 --> 00:10:57,916 - Tina and Trevor. - Ah. 220 00:10:57,959 --> 00:10:59,352 - Hi. - Nice to meet you. 221 00:10:59,396 --> 00:11:00,708 It's funny they're your friends. 222 00:11:00,733 --> 00:11:03,214 From far away, they look like your kids. 223 00:11:04,928 --> 00:11:06,787 That's right... too young. 224 00:11:07,936 --> 00:11:09,729 Tina's a fitness instructor. 225 00:11:09,754 --> 00:11:12,104 Poke her six pack, rock solid. 226 00:11:13,105 --> 00:11:14,846 Nah, that's okay, I'm good. 227 00:11:15,396 --> 00:11:17,790 Come on, go for it. 228 00:11:18,458 --> 00:11:20,721 All right, I'll touch her. I don't want to be rude. 229 00:11:25,419 --> 00:11:27,790 So, this must be really hard for you 230 00:11:27,815 --> 00:11:29,720 because you're alone and we're not. 231 00:11:29,745 --> 00:11:31,269 Oh, you think we're alone? 232 00:11:31,294 --> 00:11:33,274 No, no. We are not alone. 233 00:11:33,299 --> 00:11:34,866 - Right, Adam? - Right. 234 00:11:34,909 --> 00:11:37,216 Yeah, we're meeting our new friends here, too. 235 00:11:37,611 --> 00:11:39,958 You already met somebody? We just broke up. 236 00:11:41,259 --> 00:11:42,523 That's what happens when you let 237 00:11:42,547 --> 00:11:44,310 - the best thing in your life go. - Mm-hmm. 238 00:11:44,531 --> 00:11:46,107 We're a catch, and we got caught. 239 00:11:46,132 --> 00:11:47,257 Mm-hmm. 240 00:11:48,994 --> 00:11:50,160 In fact, there they are. 241 00:11:50,185 --> 00:11:51,281 Hey, guys. 242 00:11:51,306 --> 00:11:52,633 Sorry we're late; we're just talking to this 243 00:11:52,657 --> 00:11:54,586 super boring couple over here. 244 00:11:55,748 --> 00:11:57,951 Well, enjoy your dinner. Make sure they give you 245 00:11:57,976 --> 00:11:59,456 the crayons with your kids menu. 246 00:12:02,538 --> 00:12:03,681 Are we really doing this? 247 00:12:03,706 --> 00:12:05,686 We have to. They're watching. 248 00:12:06,751 --> 00:12:08,397 Hi! 249 00:12:12,294 --> 00:12:13,644 Do we know you? 250 00:12:13,687 --> 00:12:15,341 Not yet. 251 00:12:15,904 --> 00:12:16,872 Look, I-I know 252 00:12:16,897 --> 00:12:19,556 this sounds crazy, but we saw you from across the room 253 00:12:19,581 --> 00:12:22,072 and thought maybe we should be friends. 254 00:12:22,097 --> 00:12:23,403 It's not crazy. 255 00:12:23,761 --> 00:12:26,119 We're Buddhists and we believe 256 00:12:26,502 --> 00:12:28,896 the universe brought you to us. 257 00:12:35,814 --> 00:12:36,814 Uh-oh. 258 00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:44,462 I'm Mason. 259 00:12:44,487 --> 00:12:46,546 And this is my wife, Bessica. 260 00:12:47,003 --> 00:12:48,470 I'm sorry, did you say Jessica? 261 00:12:48,495 --> 00:12:50,243 No, Bessica. 262 00:12:50,268 --> 00:12:51,806 I was born Jessica, 263 00:12:51,831 --> 00:12:54,220 but there were so many, I changed it. 264 00:12:54,245 --> 00:12:57,604 And I figured why not be the best Jessica? 265 00:12:58,159 --> 00:12:59,596 Bessica. 266 00:13:01,022 --> 00:13:02,415 Oh. 267 00:13:02,440 --> 00:13:04,774 Sounds like a lot of paperwork for nothing. 268 00:13:04,799 --> 00:13:06,383 Uh, I'm Adam and this is... 269 00:13:06,408 --> 00:13:07,626 Bandi, yeah. 270 00:13:07,651 --> 00:13:09,163 The best Andi. 271 00:13:10,299 --> 00:13:11,942 Are you guys Buddhists, too? 272 00:13:16,346 --> 00:13:17,931 What are they talking about? 273 00:13:17,956 --> 00:13:19,666 Looks like they're talking about... 274 00:13:20,245 --> 00:13:21,581 nudists. 275 00:13:22,651 --> 00:13:24,688 Adam and I always wanted to meet nudists. 276 00:13:24,713 --> 00:13:27,750 We have so many questions, like: If you're talking to a nudist, 277 00:13:27,775 --> 00:13:29,536 and you're sitting down and he's standing up, 278 00:13:29,822 --> 00:13:31,460 what are you talking to? 279 00:13:32,947 --> 00:13:33,883 So... 280 00:13:33,908 --> 00:13:35,179 what do you guys do on the weekends? 281 00:13:35,203 --> 00:13:37,203 Oh, we watch a lot of cooking shows. 282 00:13:37,228 --> 00:13:39,445 Mm-hmm, but they're all the same, so I was thinking, 283 00:13:39,470 --> 00:13:41,780 what about a show where you can only cook what you kill? 284 00:13:41,805 --> 00:13:43,995 It's called Cook What You Kill. 285 00:13:45,587 --> 00:13:48,160 Sorry, we don't own a television. 286 00:13:48,185 --> 00:13:50,187 We just like to talk to each other. 287 00:13:52,961 --> 00:13:54,528 Well, call us in ten years, 288 00:13:54,553 --> 00:13:56,033 tell us how that's going. 289 00:13:58,052 --> 00:14:00,684 So, you guys are Buddhists, huh? 290 00:14:00,709 --> 00:14:02,668 What's the shortest way to explain that? 291 00:14:04,428 --> 00:14:07,738 Well, it's about everything and nothing. 292 00:14:08,331 --> 00:14:09,543 Huh. 293 00:14:09,568 --> 00:14:11,544 Jump in anytime here, Bandi. 294 00:14:11,588 --> 00:14:14,371 Okay, uh, well... 295 00:14:14,396 --> 00:14:16,306 how does it affect your life? 296 00:14:16,627 --> 00:14:19,302 For one thing, we don't eat meat. 297 00:14:19,463 --> 00:14:21,465 Yeah, but bacon's cool, right? 298 00:14:22,307 --> 00:14:25,620 And we're enlightened, so we don't feel anger. 299 00:14:26,331 --> 00:14:28,220 What if someone cuts you off in traffic? 300 00:14:28,245 --> 00:14:30,401 We have compassion for them. 301 00:14:30,549 --> 00:14:31,956 I have to be honest, 302 00:14:31,999 --> 00:14:33,871 you saying that makes me feel a little angry. 303 00:14:34,995 --> 00:14:37,262 You have to learn to look at things 304 00:14:37,287 --> 00:14:39,681 through your third eye. 305 00:14:44,582 --> 00:14:45,942 You mean my butt? 306 00:14:49,067 --> 00:14:51,028 And we had to sit there for three hours 307 00:14:51,053 --> 00:14:53,738 because we couldn't leave before Don and Marcy. 308 00:14:53,763 --> 00:14:55,205 It was a Mexican restaurant standoff. 309 00:14:55,229 --> 00:14:56,621 Yeah. 310 00:14:59,018 --> 00:15:02,329 But on the way home, we realized we already love you. 311 00:15:02,354 --> 00:15:04,040 And since you're dating the cat groomer, 312 00:15:04,065 --> 00:15:05,758 the four of us could be couple friends. 313 00:15:05,783 --> 00:15:07,243 Oh, that's over. 314 00:15:07,268 --> 00:15:09,369 I thought she took my breath away, but it turns out 315 00:15:09,394 --> 00:15:11,463 I'm deathly allergic to cats. 316 00:15:14,025 --> 00:15:15,760 I found out in the ambulance. 317 00:15:17,175 --> 00:15:18,914 Well, if Lowell's out, 318 00:15:18,939 --> 00:15:20,680 that means we're gonna be alone forever. 319 00:15:20,705 --> 00:15:21,876 That's not true. 320 00:15:21,901 --> 00:15:23,742 You just have to visualize what you want, 321 00:15:23,767 --> 00:15:24,986 and go out and get it. 322 00:15:25,011 --> 00:15:26,697 Who's your dream couple? 323 00:15:26,722 --> 00:15:29,821 I don't know. Just someone more like us. 324 00:15:29,846 --> 00:15:31,805 Bacon eaters. 325 00:15:32,756 --> 00:15:34,394 People who think it's funny 326 00:15:34,419 --> 00:15:36,378 - when we break old chairs. - Yeah. 327 00:15:37,734 --> 00:15:39,261 People who, when you meet them, 328 00:15:39,286 --> 00:15:41,074 you feel like you already know them. 329 00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:44,103 So you're looking for bacon lovers 330 00:15:44,128 --> 00:15:46,728 that laugh at other people's misfortunes, 331 00:15:46,823 --> 00:15:48,407 who you already know. 332 00:15:48,432 --> 00:15:49,729 Yeah. 333 00:15:50,866 --> 00:15:52,971 That's Don and Marcy. 334 00:15:54,807 --> 00:15:56,003 What? 335 00:15:56,028 --> 00:15:58,769 Don carries pocket bacon. 336 00:16:00,087 --> 00:16:03,256 And every winter, Marcy hoses down her front walk 337 00:16:03,281 --> 00:16:05,536 - so people slip on the ice. - Oh, yeah. 338 00:16:07,616 --> 00:16:10,271 You're looking for them. 339 00:16:11,086 --> 00:16:13,361 Oh, my God, we are. 340 00:16:14,093 --> 00:16:16,887 Yeah, and they were right in front of us this whole time. 341 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:19,218 Maybe we were in a rut 342 00:16:19,243 --> 00:16:22,155 because we stopped noticing what was so great about them. 343 00:16:22,180 --> 00:16:25,530 Guys, this is like the plot of every romantic comedy. 344 00:16:25,555 --> 00:16:27,866 I wouldn't be surprised if you opened that door 345 00:16:27,891 --> 00:16:29,878 and they were standing there holding 346 00:16:29,903 --> 00:16:32,297 a boombox over their heads. 347 00:16:37,224 --> 00:16:38,703 Well, it was worth a shot. 348 00:16:41,051 --> 00:16:43,620 I want our friends back. How do we get them back? 349 00:16:43,645 --> 00:16:47,166 Well, uh, in the movies, uh, you need a grand gesture. 350 00:16:47,191 --> 00:16:48,332 Like in The Notebook, 351 00:16:48,357 --> 00:16:52,792 Ryan Gosling wrote Rachel McAdams a letter every day for a year. 352 00:16:53,421 --> 00:16:55,510 We don't have that kind of time! 353 00:16:57,535 --> 00:16:58,536 Ooh. 354 00:16:59,218 --> 00:17:00,343 But I do have an idea. 355 00:17:00,368 --> 00:17:01,472 Come on, come on. 356 00:17:01,496 --> 00:17:03,241 Yes, go to them. 357 00:17:03,379 --> 00:17:05,240 I'm crying because of the cat allergy, 358 00:17:05,265 --> 00:17:07,267 not because of this! 359 00:17:09,610 --> 00:17:10,829 So now 360 00:17:10,854 --> 00:17:12,552 Adam and Andi have new couple friends 361 00:17:12,577 --> 00:17:13,682 and we're alone again. 362 00:17:13,726 --> 00:17:15,875 Well, what happened to the broad with the iron stomach? 363 00:17:15,899 --> 00:17:18,728 She was gonna let me hit her with a board. 364 00:17:18,840 --> 00:17:20,102 Nah, they're out. 365 00:17:20,127 --> 00:17:21,245 They don't watch TV. 366 00:17:21,270 --> 00:17:22,556 They talk to each other. 367 00:17:22,581 --> 00:17:24,453 Sounds like they're in a cult. 368 00:17:25,469 --> 00:17:28,045 So we were thinking maybe you could be our couple friends. 369 00:17:32,783 --> 00:17:34,001 That's a nice offer, son, 370 00:17:34,026 --> 00:17:36,681 but your mother doesn't really care for Marcy. 371 00:17:37,793 --> 00:17:40,016 I think what your father was trying to say is 372 00:17:40,041 --> 00:17:42,500 we've been here 20 minutes 373 00:17:42,525 --> 00:17:44,409 but it seems a lot longer. 374 00:17:45,844 --> 00:17:48,989 Yeah, well, the clock's not ticking any faster over here, Bev. 375 00:17:49,752 --> 00:17:51,142 Well, we've insulted each other. 376 00:17:51,167 --> 00:17:53,099 I think it's time to go. 377 00:17:54,612 --> 00:17:55,780 Hey, Ma. 378 00:17:55,805 --> 00:17:58,706 Oh, nice to see you, son who didn't marry Marcy. 379 00:17:59,963 --> 00:18:00,966 What's her deal? 380 00:18:00,991 --> 00:18:03,643 We stirred the pot, enjoy the stew. 381 00:18:06,129 --> 00:18:07,391 What are you doing here? 382 00:18:07,416 --> 00:18:08,737 Uh... 383 00:18:09,179 --> 00:18:12,629 Listen, we know you're happy with your new couple, but... 384 00:18:13,395 --> 00:18:15,289 we went out there looking for something better, 385 00:18:15,314 --> 00:18:17,050 and we couldn't find it. 386 00:18:18,290 --> 00:18:21,093 Well... that means a lot. 387 00:18:21,118 --> 00:18:23,578 And, to be honest, neither could we. 388 00:18:23,973 --> 00:18:27,079 Also, Marcy didn't really hurt her ankle. 389 00:18:30,048 --> 00:18:33,038 You guys are perfect for us. 390 00:18:33,063 --> 00:18:34,067 I mean, I... 391 00:18:34,235 --> 00:18:36,461 And I guess what I'm trying to say is, you know, 392 00:18:36,669 --> 00:18:38,106 we're just a couple 393 00:18:38,131 --> 00:18:40,438 standing in front of another couple... 394 00:18:40,779 --> 00:18:42,433 asking them to love us. 395 00:18:44,768 --> 00:18:46,378 What's that? What are we doing? 396 00:18:46,985 --> 00:18:48,342 It's from Notting Hill. 397 00:18:48,984 --> 00:18:52,514 Look... you're our best friends and-and... 398 00:18:52,539 --> 00:18:54,958 we're sorry that we took you for granted. 399 00:18:56,359 --> 00:18:58,108 We got lazy, too. 400 00:18:58,133 --> 00:18:59,928 We could've said something instead of 401 00:18:59,953 --> 00:19:01,504 going behind your back. 402 00:19:01,529 --> 00:19:02,937 Well, you know what? 403 00:19:02,962 --> 00:19:05,577 We could all be a little more honest with each other. 404 00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:06,886 Like, you should've told us you wanted 405 00:19:06,910 --> 00:19:09,102 - to go to Jalapeño Kevin's. - Well, 406 00:19:09,146 --> 00:19:11,081 we thought you didn't want to try anything new. 407 00:19:11,106 --> 00:19:12,673 You made fun of the jug band. 408 00:19:13,089 --> 00:19:15,058 You mean this jug band? 409 00:19:15,519 --> 00:19:16,814 You got us tickets? 410 00:19:16,839 --> 00:19:17,745 You remembered. 411 00:19:17,770 --> 00:19:19,316 Yeah, it's a grand gesture 412 00:19:19,341 --> 00:19:20,984 to show you how much you mean to us. 413 00:19:21,464 --> 00:19:24,248 I got to tell you, that touches my heart. 414 00:19:24,550 --> 00:19:27,251 Hey, you guys want to go to Mick's and get a burger? 415 00:19:27,323 --> 00:19:29,296 Oh, that sounds great. 416 00:19:29,340 --> 00:19:30,819 So, what's new with you guys? 417 00:19:30,863 --> 00:19:32,564 Adam broke a dead guy's chair. 418 00:19:32,589 --> 00:19:34,649 Sounds funny. Save it for dinner. 419 00:19:35,191 --> 00:19:38,041 Oh, I can't wait to tell you my new idea for a cooking show. 420 00:19:38,066 --> 00:19:40,681 Check it out... you got to cook what you kill. 421 00:19:40,706 --> 00:19:41,923 Ooh. 422 00:19:41,948 --> 00:19:43,528 You should call it Cook What You Kill. 423 00:19:43,571 --> 00:19:45,002 That's what I was thinking. 424 00:19:45,027 --> 00:19:46,159 I'm so glad we're friends again. 425 00:19:46,183 --> 00:19:47,548 We're gonna be a millionaires. 426 00:19:47,573 --> 00:19:48,954 - Whoa, "we"? - Yeah. 427 00:19:48,979 --> 00:19:51,065 - What do you mean, "we"? It was my idea. - Well... 428 00:19:51,090 --> 00:19:52,309 No, it was my idea... 429 00:19:58,996 --> 00:20:01,378 Okay, now, just remember the jug band isn't for us. 430 00:20:01,403 --> 00:20:02,399 It's for our friends. 431 00:20:02,424 --> 00:20:04,220 Right, we just want them to have a good time. 432 00:20:04,244 --> 00:20:05,550 All right? Okay. 433 00:20:06,425 --> 00:20:07,987 - Hey. - Hey. 434 00:20:14,428 --> 00:20:16,213 That was awesome! 435 00:20:16,770 --> 00:20:18,772 Nice jugs! 436 00:20:20,765 --> 00:20:25,765 Synced and corrected by Octavia - www.addic7ed.com - 31487

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