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♪ It seems today
that all you see ♪
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00:00:05,044 --> 00:00:08,330
♪ Is violence in movies
and sex on TV ♪
3
00:00:08,414 --> 00:00:11,817
♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values ♪
4
00:00:11,868 --> 00:00:14,787
♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
5
00:00:14,854 --> 00:00:18,373
♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
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00:00:18,458 --> 00:00:21,577
♪ Lucky there's a man
who positively can do ♪
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00:00:21,644 --> 00:00:23,178
♪ All the things that make us ♪
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00:00:23,263 --> 00:00:24,630
♪ Laugh and cry ♪
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00:00:24,681 --> 00:00:26,090
♪ He's... a...
Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
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00:00:26,115 --> 00:00:28,615
♪ Family Guy 10x22 ♪ Viewer Mail 2
Original Air Date on May 20, 2012
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00:00:28,616 --> 00:00:31,116
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
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00:00:31,154 --> 00:00:34,072
Hello, I'm Brian Griffin.
And I'm Stewie Griffin.
13
00:00:34,140 --> 00:00:36,842
A few years ago, we did an
episode called "Viewer Mail"
14
00:00:36,910 --> 00:00:39,411
where you, our fans,
wrote in and suggested ideas
15
00:00:39,479 --> 00:00:41,029
for new episodes.
16
00:00:41,097 --> 00:00:43,866
Well, it's ten years later, but
you're still sending in ideas.
17
00:00:43,933 --> 00:00:46,602
Uh, to Rashad in Little Rock,
we wanna let you know
18
00:00:46,669 --> 00:00:50,255
we kicked around idea, "Make the
Baby Go Wild" for a while,
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00:00:50,323 --> 00:00:52,374
couldn't really find
an angle on it.
20
00:00:52,458 --> 00:00:54,643
Here's one from
Lee Mills of Iowa.
21
00:00:54,711 --> 00:00:57,546
Lee writes: "Dear FamilyGuy,
was your show based on anything?"
22
00:00:57,614 --> 00:00:59,264
That's a great question, Lee.
23
00:00:59,332 --> 00:01:02,100
In fact, Family Guy is based
on an American television series
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00:01:02,168 --> 00:01:04,069
called TheSimpsons.
25
00:01:04,137 --> 00:01:07,222
Actually, FamilyGuy,
much like The Office,
26
00:01:07,307 --> 00:01:09,341
is based on a British series
called Chap of the Manor.
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00:01:09,409 --> 00:01:10,759
Let's watch.
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00:01:18,935 --> 00:01:20,469
We now return to Britain's
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00:01:20,537 --> 00:01:22,170
most popular game show...
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00:01:22,238 --> 00:01:25,641
Wheel... of... Politeness!
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00:01:25,708 --> 00:01:27,409
Do go ahead, then.
Oh, no, you first.
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00:01:27,477 --> 00:01:29,378
Wouldn't dream of it.
Too kind, really, I insist.
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00:01:29,445 --> 00:01:31,446
Wouldn't be proper of me.
I appreciate your courtesy.
34
00:01:31,514 --> 00:01:32,714
Likewise.
Well, we're all out of time.
35
00:01:32,782 --> 00:01:34,216
Join us same time tomorrow
36
00:01:34,284 --> 00:01:36,251
if it's not entirely
inconvenient for you.
37
00:01:36,319 --> 00:01:37,619
If so, of course,
we do understand
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00:01:37,687 --> 00:01:39,421
and we do apologize in advance.
39
00:01:39,489 --> 00:01:42,157
This has all been an imposition.
I'm so dreadfully sorry.
40
00:01:42,225 --> 00:01:42,958
Sorry! Sorry.
Sorry.
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00:01:43,026 --> 00:01:44,159
Sorry, everyone!
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00:01:48,464 --> 00:01:49,698
None for me, Lydia.
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00:01:49,766 --> 00:01:51,366
I'm meeting me mates
down at the pub.
46
00:01:51,434 --> 00:01:53,719
Again? But Neville,
you spend all your time
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00:01:53,770 --> 00:01:56,321
down at the Fox and Pig
and Dog and Wolf and Cat
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00:01:56,389 --> 00:01:57,489
and Fiddle and
Whistle and Cock.
49
00:01:57,557 --> 00:01:58,840
And that's where
you're wrong.
50
00:01:58,908 --> 00:02:00,976
The Fox and Pig and Dog
and Wolf and Cat
51
00:02:01,060 --> 00:02:02,895
and Fiddle and Whistle and Cock
is for tossers.
52
00:02:02,946 --> 00:02:05,147
We're meetin' at the Dog and Cat
and Bull and Whistle
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00:02:05,214 --> 00:02:07,149
and Fiddle and Cock
and Pig and Wolf and Carriage
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00:02:07,216 --> 00:02:08,684
and Fife and Other Wolf!
55
00:02:08,751 --> 00:02:11,203
But I need you to stay and have
a chat with Collingsworth.
56
00:02:11,271 --> 00:02:13,405
I found him with another fag
in his mouth this morning.
57
00:02:13,473 --> 00:02:14,740
Oh, is that right?
58
00:02:14,807 --> 00:02:16,675
So you fancy fags, do you?
59
00:02:16,743 --> 00:02:19,211
Well, here.
Have a whole carton of fags!
60
00:02:19,279 --> 00:02:22,297
I just want a comely lass
to look upon me with favour.
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00:02:22,382 --> 00:02:23,799
I look on you with favour.
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00:02:23,866 --> 00:02:25,450
I look on all of you
with favour.
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00:02:25,518 --> 00:02:27,019
Shut up, British Meg.
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00:02:27,086 --> 00:02:28,120
Look at Lydia.
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00:02:28,187 --> 00:02:30,689
What a two-bit Wichita whore.
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00:02:30,757 --> 00:02:32,991
One of these days,
she's gonna wake up killt.
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00:02:33,059 --> 00:02:34,459
Ah, matricide.
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00:02:34,527 --> 00:02:36,495
Yet another of
your childhood whims.
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00:02:36,562 --> 00:02:38,230
No, it ain't. I'm gonna follow
through with...
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00:02:38,298 --> 00:02:39,531
Wait, why'd you say it
like that?
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00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:42,501
Cutaway, sir?
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00:02:42,568 --> 00:02:44,603
Yes, that's good then.
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00:02:44,671 --> 00:02:47,506
Friends, family,
and characters random
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00:02:47,573 --> 00:02:50,342
To bring you joy
and laughter in tandem
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00:02:50,410 --> 00:02:53,178
To divert and dazzle
is our intention
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00:02:53,246 --> 00:02:56,498
So sit back, relax,
and enjoy our invention.
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00:02:59,118 --> 00:03:01,536
Ah, I love summer.
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00:03:10,113 --> 00:03:12,581
Good evening, Billingsbury.
I'm Clive Crowley.
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00:03:12,649 --> 00:03:15,117
Coming up: a man with a gun
and two bullets
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00:03:15,184 --> 00:03:17,285
has taken over the city
of Manchester.
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00:03:17,353 --> 00:03:20,022
But first, our top story
tonight: Her Majesty, the Queen,
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00:03:20,089 --> 00:03:22,324
will be passing through
our very town tomorrow.
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00:03:22,392 --> 00:03:24,259
With details, we now go live
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00:03:24,327 --> 00:03:26,228
to Indian reporter,
Tricia Dasgupta.
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00:03:26,295 --> 00:03:28,964
Oh, my golly,
there is much commotion.
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00:03:29,032 --> 00:03:30,632
Thank you, Tricia.
After the interval,
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00:03:30,700 --> 00:03:33,502
find out which 12 football teams
tied tonight.
88
00:03:33,569 --> 00:03:35,437
The Queen's comin'
to Billingsbury?
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00:03:35,505 --> 00:03:37,139
That's bloody sweet!
90
00:03:37,206 --> 00:03:39,274
You know, I'm actually a
relation of the royal family.
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00:03:39,342 --> 00:03:41,143
You most certainly are not.
92
00:03:41,210 --> 00:03:42,944
Where would you
get that idea?
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00:03:43,012 --> 00:03:44,946
Me mum used to claim
she was a Windsor.
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00:03:45,014 --> 00:03:47,849
And I always heard my Nana talk
about how she took a duke.
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00:03:47,917 --> 00:03:49,451
Must've been a difficult
marriage, too,
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00:03:49,519 --> 00:03:51,219
'cause every afternoon
she'd be belly-achin'
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00:03:51,287 --> 00:03:52,788
about her bloody duke.
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00:03:52,855 --> 00:03:54,923
I think you just had
a gross grandmother.
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00:03:54,991 --> 00:03:57,192
No, I'm quite sure of it.
And to prove it,
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00:03:57,260 --> 00:03:59,227
I'm gonna nick
one of the Queen's hairs
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00:03:59,295 --> 00:04:00,846
during her visit tomorrow.
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00:04:00,913 --> 00:04:03,799
And when the DNA proves a match,
you'll see I'm royalty.
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00:04:03,866 --> 00:04:05,267
The Queen, eh?
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00:04:05,334 --> 00:04:07,469
I'd like to mash my banger
in her blood pudding.
105
00:04:07,537 --> 00:04:08,570
Googity. Googity. Glop.
106
00:04:08,654 --> 00:04:10,789
Hello, lads.
Oh, hello, Seamus.
107
00:04:10,857 --> 00:04:13,225
Right fine performance
at the cricket match today.
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00:04:13,292 --> 00:04:16,294
Aye. I was spirited to have you
down there watching me.
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00:04:16,362 --> 00:04:18,163
Well, it's a brilliant day
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00:04:18,231 --> 00:04:19,431
for a long and
confusing game of cricket.
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00:04:19,499 --> 00:04:21,466
The field is teeming
with men in helmets
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00:04:21,534 --> 00:04:23,135
who don't seem like
they need helmets,
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00:04:23,202 --> 00:04:24,703
and men not in helmets
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00:04:24,771 --> 00:04:26,171
who seem like they probably
should be wearing helmets.
115
00:04:26,238 --> 00:04:29,141
Oh, he's batted it
clear out of the stadium.
116
00:04:29,208 --> 00:04:32,644
Is that good? We don't know,
but it's what we do!
117
00:04:32,712 --> 00:04:34,046
Y-Yay!
118
00:04:34,113 --> 00:04:34,980
Boo!
Boo!
119
00:04:35,048 --> 00:04:35,981
Boo!
120
00:04:39,218 --> 00:04:42,104
Oh my goodness, the Queen is
going to be here presently.
121
00:04:42,171 --> 00:04:43,939
This is oh-so-exciting!
122
00:04:44,006 --> 00:04:46,174
My favorite part
before the Queen arrives
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00:04:46,242 --> 00:04:48,944
is yelling "wanker"
at Prince Charles as he passes.
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00:04:49,028 --> 00:04:50,362
Wanker!
Wanker!
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00:04:50,429 --> 00:04:52,097
I know, I know.
126
00:04:52,148 --> 00:04:53,398
Wanker!
Wanker!
127
00:04:53,449 --> 00:04:55,266
Yes, I know. Yes.
128
00:04:55,318 --> 00:04:56,785
Wanker!
You're a wanker!
129
00:04:56,869 --> 00:04:58,703
Wanker!
Right, quite right.
130
00:04:58,771 --> 00:05:00,322
Spot on. He's got it.
131
00:05:00,389 --> 00:05:03,075
I say, a lot of people have
turned out to see the Queen.
132
00:05:03,142 --> 00:05:04,443
Should make for a grand day.
133
00:05:04,510 --> 00:05:07,295
Hey, watch it there!
134
00:05:15,655 --> 00:05:17,506
Good show, old chap.
Well played.
135
00:05:17,573 --> 00:05:18,640
Here she comes!
136
00:05:22,411 --> 00:05:24,129
Very well.
Time for action.
137
00:05:24,197 --> 00:05:27,332
A lock of the Queen's hair
shall soon be mine.
138
00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:29,151
Here she comes.
Have at it then.
139
00:05:29,218 --> 00:05:32,204
Crikey! This is a haircut
fit for a queen!
140
00:05:35,158 --> 00:05:36,491
Oh, bloody hell!
141
00:05:36,559 --> 00:05:38,560
All right, time for Plan B.
Let's go!
142
00:05:45,985 --> 00:05:47,803
I'm not going any lower.
143
00:05:47,870 --> 00:05:49,754
Well, Father,
you gave it a good go.
144
00:05:49,822 --> 00:05:52,657
Oh, we're not done yet.
Come on!
145
00:05:54,326 --> 00:05:57,546
Queen! Queen! Give me
some of your hair!
146
00:05:57,630 --> 00:05:59,631
Come on, Queen!
Don't be a bitch!
147
00:05:59,682 --> 00:06:01,349
Get us away
from that lunatic!
148
00:06:11,644 --> 00:06:13,111
She's heading into that tunnel!
149
00:06:17,850 --> 00:06:20,652
Dear God! The Queen's dead!
150
00:06:23,706 --> 00:06:25,857
All right, Collingsworth,
I got a hair.
151
00:06:25,908 --> 00:06:29,377
Now, just walk away casual-like
and we're in the clear.
152
00:06:29,462 --> 00:06:30,996
Oh, no!
Here come the coppers!
153
00:06:43,292 --> 00:06:44,559
Bugger.
154
00:06:46,863 --> 00:06:48,430
Bugger.
155
00:06:50,533 --> 00:06:51,633
Bugger.
156
00:06:54,904 --> 00:06:57,038
Well, it turns out
I'm not royalty.
157
00:06:57,106 --> 00:06:58,773
Shame about the Queen, though.
158
00:06:58,841 --> 00:07:01,276
Yeah, I reckon she's with
Jesus Christ in heaven now.
159
00:07:02,745 --> 00:07:04,729
Well, I'm just happy our
family is safe and sound
160
00:07:04,797 --> 00:07:06,932
back in our cozy row house.
161
00:07:06,999 --> 00:07:08,300
Row house.
162
00:07:15,651 --> 00:07:17,051
We now return
163
00:07:17,119 --> 00:07:19,003
to The Comedy Central Roastof Robin Williams.
164
00:07:19,631 --> 00:07:21,749
Aw, man, Robin Williams
is my favorite!
165
00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:23,183
He must be getting recognized
166
00:07:23,251 --> 00:07:24,885
for all his contributions
to show business.
167
00:07:24,953 --> 00:07:26,487
I don't think
that's what a roast is.
168
00:07:26,554 --> 00:07:29,490
Robin, as a comic, it's an honor
to be up here roasting you.
169
00:07:29,557 --> 00:07:31,725
As a moviegoer, I want
to punch you in the face.
170
00:07:33,428 --> 00:07:35,295
Oh, that's funny.
Advocate violence.
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00:07:35,363 --> 00:07:36,663
And let's face it, Mork.
172
00:07:36,731 --> 00:07:38,732
You're getting Nanu-Na-old!
173
00:07:40,769 --> 00:07:42,402
Stop it! You stop it!
174
00:07:42,470 --> 00:07:46,039
Robin Williams has a manic gift
that gladdens a sad world
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00:07:46,107 --> 00:07:49,977
and all he asks in return
is our unceasing attention!
176
00:07:50,044 --> 00:07:51,878
How can you allow this?!
177
00:07:51,930 --> 00:07:54,898
Robin Williams has given us
nothing but joy!
178
00:07:54,983 --> 00:07:57,351
I wish everyone
was Robin Williams!
179
00:08:01,272 --> 00:08:03,723
Boy, that looks enticing.
180
00:08:05,326 --> 00:08:08,579
Yeah, this is nice.
181
00:08:13,284 --> 00:08:15,552
Oh, my God.
What happened?
182
00:08:15,620 --> 00:08:18,472
You were in a coma, and then I
kissed you, and you woke up.
183
00:08:18,540 --> 00:08:20,007
Like two days later.
184
00:08:20,074 --> 00:08:22,042
Anyway, all your
numbers are normal.
185
00:08:22,093 --> 00:08:23,544
What numbers?
No idea.
186
00:08:23,611 --> 00:08:26,513
Well, congratulations.
You're gonna be just fine.
187
00:08:28,116 --> 00:08:29,566
Oh, my God!
188
00:08:29,634 --> 00:08:31,018
You're...
You're Robin Williams!
189
00:08:31,085 --> 00:08:33,654
Ding! Thank you for playing
"That's Obvious!"
190
00:08:33,721 --> 00:08:35,022
Tell him what he's won, Cletus!
191
00:08:35,089 --> 00:08:36,223
- Money!
Ho-ho! Money.
192
00:08:36,291 --> 00:08:37,207
Or as the Republicans
call it,
193
00:08:37,275 --> 00:08:38,225
Mine!
194
00:08:39,794 --> 00:08:41,428
I hope this is covered
by your HMO.
195
00:08:41,496 --> 00:08:43,497
I was covered once by
an HMO in San Francisco.
196
00:08:43,565 --> 00:08:45,766
I Haight my Ashbury
in these jeans!
197
00:08:45,834 --> 00:08:47,434
Ding-ding, Rice-A-Roni!
198
00:08:47,502 --> 00:08:50,537
Ah! You got all those
references in there!
199
00:08:50,605 --> 00:08:51,972
Of course now everyone
can afford health care
200
00:08:52,040 --> 00:08:52,940
because of Obama.
201
00:08:53,007 --> 00:08:54,541
Yeah, you want a Band-Aid?
202
00:08:54,609 --> 00:08:57,277
No problem, turkey.
Come on down to Obama-Mart!
203
00:08:57,345 --> 00:08:59,746
The price is free,
but yo ass better vote for me.
204
00:08:59,814 --> 00:09:01,548
Ha! Political
with a twist.
205
00:09:01,616 --> 00:09:03,116
It's funny from the news!
206
00:09:03,167 --> 00:09:05,168
What's going on in here?
You gotta check this out!
207
00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:06,470
It's Robin Williams!
208
00:09:06,538 --> 00:09:08,222
Ho-ho! A nurse
is a nurse, of curse.
209
00:09:08,289 --> 00:09:10,457
Up yours, Wilbur.
210
00:09:10,508 --> 00:09:11,842
Oh, my God!
211
00:09:11,910 --> 00:09:14,111
Everyone I touch
turns into Robin Williams!
212
00:09:14,178 --> 00:09:16,647
Yess! Peter Sweet Cheeks
Griffin-uh!
213
00:09:16,714 --> 00:09:19,366
You have been given
the power from god-uh!
214
00:09:19,434 --> 00:09:20,367
Ho-ho! Ho-ho!
Ho-ho!
215
00:09:22,921 --> 00:09:25,722
I will be so responsible
with this.
216
00:09:25,790 --> 00:09:27,190
Thanks, guys!
217
00:09:27,258 --> 00:09:28,642
Ho-ho!
Bye!
218
00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:30,644
See you, Peter!
Y'all come back now, y'hear?
219
00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:32,079
It's Patch Adams Robin.
220
00:09:32,146 --> 00:09:34,631
He cures stuff the fun way,
not the medicine way.
221
00:09:38,136 --> 00:09:40,504
So, somehow the lightning
gave your dad
222
00:09:40,572 --> 00:09:43,340
the power to turn anyone
I touch into Robin Williams.
223
00:09:43,408 --> 00:09:46,176
Peter, did Dr. Hartman say
how long this was gonna last?
224
00:09:46,244 --> 00:09:47,611
There is no more
Dr. Hartman, Lois.
225
00:09:47,679 --> 00:09:49,413
He's Robin Williams now.
226
00:09:49,480 --> 00:09:50,814
Bet you kids never thought
your dad
227
00:09:50,882 --> 00:09:52,999
would have superpowers, huh?
228
00:09:53,051 --> 00:09:55,786
Peter!
Ho-ho! You pat my back, I pat yours,
229
00:09:55,853 --> 00:09:57,387
and Pat Robertson
pats Mr. Happy.
230
00:09:57,455 --> 00:09:59,890
Yayuss! Praise
Jesus with your Visa card!
231
00:09:59,958 --> 00:10:01,725
Max it out
on the Lord, people!
232
00:10:01,793 --> 00:10:03,093
Oh, boy!
233
00:10:03,161 --> 00:10:05,329
And that's the second
Southern preacher one.
234
00:10:05,396 --> 00:10:06,997
Look, Brian! Meg is
one of the sensitive,
235
00:10:07,065 --> 00:10:08,632
bearded Robin Williams
characters.
236
00:10:08,700 --> 00:10:10,000
Ha!
237
00:10:10,068 --> 00:10:11,635
You think that's funny, chief?
Well, I...
238
00:10:11,703 --> 00:10:13,103
My wife is dead.
239
00:10:13,171 --> 00:10:15,205
Oh, I'm... I'm sorry.
240
00:10:15,273 --> 00:10:17,074
She's dead, chief.
Ho-ho! Dead.
241
00:10:17,141 --> 00:10:20,043
The Grateful Dead. Please
do not take the brown acid.
242
00:10:20,111 --> 00:10:21,862
It will turn you
into a Martian.
243
00:10:21,930 --> 00:10:23,664
Take me to your wiener.
Ho-ho!
244
00:10:23,731 --> 00:10:26,333
We're.
245
00:10:26,401 --> 00:10:29,036
("Rockin' Robin"
by Bobby Day playing)
246
00:10:31,639 --> 00:10:33,590
♪ ♪
247
00:10:37,895 --> 00:10:40,213
♪ He rocks in the treetop
all a day long ♪
248
00:10:40,264 --> 00:10:42,699
♪ Hoppin' and a-boppin'
and a-singin' the song ♪
249
00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:45,719
♪ All the little birds
on Jaybird Street ♪
250
00:10:45,787 --> 00:10:48,238
♪ Love to hear the robin
goin' tweet-tweet-tweet ♪
251
00:10:48,306 --> 00:10:50,524
♪ Rockin' robin,
tweet-tweet-tweet. ♪
252
00:10:53,144 --> 00:10:55,228
I don't know, Peter.
This all seems kind of creepy.
253
00:10:55,296 --> 00:10:56,980
What do you mean?
This is great!
254
00:10:57,048 --> 00:10:58,815
Everyone's hilarious now!
255
00:10:58,883 --> 00:11:00,651
What do you think, Quagmire?
256
00:11:00,718 --> 00:11:03,005
What? I can't hear a thing
over this noise.
257
00:11:03,030 --> 00:11:03,503
What?!
258
00:11:03,504 --> 00:11:05,105
This is unbearable!
259
00:11:05,173 --> 00:11:07,541
I think I got just the thing
to cheer you up, Joe.
260
00:11:07,592 --> 00:11:11,044
I know I said I was a leg man,
but this is ridiculous. Ho!
261
00:11:11,112 --> 00:11:12,913
I feel like a testicle
on steroids.
262
00:11:12,981 --> 00:11:14,881
Honey, I shrunk my nuts!
Ho! Ha!
263
00:11:14,949 --> 00:11:16,683
Ho-ho! I'm a
San Francisco pirate.
264
00:11:16,751 --> 00:11:19,219
I Haight my Ashbury
in these jeans!
265
00:11:19,287 --> 00:11:21,304
A lot of the material
is repeated.
266
00:11:24,959 --> 00:11:26,293
Mmm, Lois,
267
00:11:26,361 --> 00:11:29,629
your torso is
so broad and solid.
268
00:11:32,800 --> 00:11:33,884
Ah! You're not Lois!
269
00:11:33,951 --> 00:11:36,219
I can hear you!
I'm not deaf!
270
00:11:36,287 --> 00:11:38,972
I don't believe that's
real sign language!
271
00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:40,791
Brian, this is
a disaster!
272
00:11:40,858 --> 00:11:42,342
I turned everyone
into Robin Williams!
273
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:43,960
You gotta help me!
274
00:11:44,028 --> 00:11:45,128
Yo-yo-yo! Peter G.
275
00:11:45,213 --> 00:11:47,330
What's happening,
dawg?
276
00:11:47,398 --> 00:11:49,583
Oh, Sideways Hat Robin.
Dear God, no!
277
00:11:51,636 --> 00:11:55,672
♪ Gonna have some hot tea,
baby, this morning! ♪
278
00:11:57,058 --> 00:11:58,892
Run, Forrest, run!
Run, Forrest, run!
279
00:11:58,959 --> 00:12:00,510
All right, Rupert,
all we have to do
280
00:12:00,578 --> 00:12:01,812
is act like Robin Williams,
281
00:12:01,896 --> 00:12:03,780
and he'll think
we've already changed.
282
00:12:03,848 --> 00:12:05,215
Ho-ho! Scattered
stream of references!
283
00:12:05,283 --> 00:12:07,451
Lots of energy! One good one
for every ten! Ho-ho!
284
00:12:11,989 --> 00:12:14,474
Damn these hands!
285
00:12:14,542 --> 00:12:16,176
Mwah!
286
00:12:16,244 --> 00:12:18,478
Vell, I haven't been
to temple in a while!
287
00:12:18,529 --> 00:12:20,180
Ah!
288
00:12:20,248 --> 00:12:21,915
Ladies and gentleman,
The Doors!
289
00:12:24,368 --> 00:12:26,336
Ho-ho! Jogging!
Running on empty! Ho-ho!
290
00:12:26,421 --> 00:12:28,088
Run, Forrest, run!
291
00:12:28,155 --> 00:12:30,841
Ho-ho! Ho-ho! Ho-ho!
292
00:12:30,925 --> 00:12:32,909
Ho-ho! I'm a Mercedes!
293
00:12:32,977 --> 00:12:34,211
Und vere are your papers?
294
00:12:34,278 --> 00:12:36,279
Are you from
East or Vest Berlin?
295
00:12:36,347 --> 00:12:39,015
Vell, I'm from Vest Berlin, pilgrim.
296
00:12:41,819 --> 00:12:43,103
Shut up!
297
00:12:47,608 --> 00:12:50,009
Ho-ho! Ho-ho!
Ho-ho! Ho-ho!
298
00:12:50,061 --> 00:12:52,329
Stop riffing!
299
00:12:55,233 --> 00:12:56,650
Jump, Forest, jump!
300
00:12:56,701 --> 00:12:58,135
Must be a leap
year, ho-ho!
301
00:13:04,842 --> 00:13:06,793
Time to lose
some weight, dearie?
302
00:13:06,861 --> 00:13:09,896
No... more... comedy.
303
00:13:15,536 --> 00:13:17,170
Guys, will you please
settle down?
304
00:13:17,221 --> 00:13:18,705
Can we, can we settle down,
please?
305
00:13:18,756 --> 00:13:20,023
Every... everyone.
306
00:13:20,091 --> 00:13:21,424
Everyone, can I have
your attention?
307
00:13:21,492 --> 00:13:22,826
Oh, Captains! My Captains!
308
00:13:22,894 --> 00:13:25,879
I have an announcement to make:
309
00:13:25,947 --> 00:13:27,380
You are all free!
310
00:13:27,448 --> 00:13:29,449
You have been fired
from the school.
311
00:13:29,517 --> 00:13:33,203
Vietnam is over.
The hospital is closing.
312
00:13:33,271 --> 00:13:35,238
Will Hunting is all better.
313
00:13:35,306 --> 00:13:36,907
It's not your fault.
It's not your fault.
314
00:13:36,974 --> 00:13:39,042
Shut up. Seriously, shut up.
315
00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:40,544
Please, you are done here.
316
00:13:40,611 --> 00:13:43,847
Go and spread your comedy
to all corners of this country.
317
00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:48,351
Wait, not you five.
318
00:13:48,419 --> 00:13:51,555
I'm gonna keep you for...
an experiment.
319
00:13:53,291 --> 00:13:54,591
Ho-ho! Eggs!
320
00:13:54,659 --> 00:13:56,443
Who came first, the chicken
or the porn star?
321
00:13:56,511 --> 00:13:57,544
Ho-ho!
The Porn Identity!
322
00:13:57,612 --> 00:13:58,845
Who am I? Oh, yeah!
The pizza man!
323
00:13:58,913 --> 00:14:01,081
Baka-chikka-bwow-bwow!
Ho-ho! Ho-ho!
324
00:14:01,149 --> 00:14:02,349
Peter, can you pass
the coffee?
325
00:14:02,416 --> 00:14:05,051
Sure, Brian the dog.
326
00:14:05,119 --> 00:14:09,973
Anything for my family.
327
00:14:10,057 --> 00:14:12,142
Coffee now.
Here we go, here we go.
328
00:14:15,229 --> 00:14:18,097
I guess Disney wouldn't let us
do the Aladdin one.
329
00:14:27,553 --> 00:14:30,488
Stewie, rise and shine.
330
00:14:31,988 --> 00:14:34,423
Good morning, Stewie.
331
00:14:34,490 --> 00:14:35,691
you.
332
00:14:35,758 --> 00:14:37,876
You ready for the day, sweetie?
333
00:14:37,944 --> 00:14:40,245
Oh, someone needs
a diaper change.
334
00:14:45,918 --> 00:14:47,252
Are you proud
of yourself?
335
00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:48,604
That this
is what you do?
336
00:14:48,671 --> 00:14:50,722
Is this a dime?
Did you swallow a dime?
337
00:14:50,790 --> 00:14:53,242
Yeah, wipe it off
and put it back in your purse,
338
00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:54,610
you white trash hen.
339
00:14:54,677 --> 00:14:55,844
There we go.
340
00:14:55,912 --> 00:14:58,430
Who's my clean little boy?
341
00:15:01,934 --> 00:15:03,402
Ugh! Your roots
are ridiculous.
342
00:15:03,469 --> 00:15:04,553
I'm gonna grab
your hair 'cause
343
00:15:04,621 --> 00:15:05,687
I like grabbing stuff.
344
00:15:05,755 --> 00:15:08,123
Okay. Okay, Stewie, let go.
345
00:15:08,208 --> 00:15:10,309
Let, let go, Stewie.
Let go of Mommy's hair.
346
00:15:10,376 --> 00:15:12,511
When I grow up, I'm
never gonna call you.
347
00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:14,780
I'm gonna be busy
with my job and my family.
348
00:15:14,847 --> 00:15:16,515
You'll be nothing.
349
00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:24,456
Stewie, I want you
to have my ring.
350
00:15:24,507 --> 00:15:26,275
It's one of my most
important possessions,
351
00:15:26,342 --> 00:15:28,143
and I want you to have it.
352
00:15:28,211 --> 00:15:30,779
Okay, red flag.
Red flag, everybody!
353
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,935
Hey, Stewie,
wanna go down the slide?
354
00:15:36,986 --> 00:15:38,587
Um...
355
00:15:38,655 --> 00:15:39,788
What's the matter?
356
00:15:39,856 --> 00:15:41,657
Ya never been down
the slide before?
357
00:15:41,724 --> 00:15:43,592
Yeah, like,
like a thousand times.
358
00:15:43,660 --> 00:15:46,828
Just done it so much
I'm bored with it, that's all.
359
00:15:48,815 --> 00:15:51,300
All right, I guess
we're doing this.
360
00:15:54,837 --> 00:15:55,837
Whoa.
361
00:15:55,905 --> 00:15:57,589
Come on down,
Stewie!
362
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:03,362
This is crazy. This is crazy.
This is crazy.
363
00:16:03,429 --> 00:16:07,299
All right, you can do this,
Stewie. Here we go.
364
00:16:10,320 --> 00:16:11,286
Are you okay?
365
00:16:11,354 --> 00:16:12,754
Yeah, that wasn't so bad.
366
00:16:12,822 --> 00:16:14,189
You might wanna move.
367
00:16:14,257 --> 00:16:16,391
That farting Polish kid
is coming down the slide.
368
00:16:18,294 --> 00:16:19,661
Ah, Pavel!
369
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:37,963
Hey, kid, come here.
I wanna see
370
00:16:38,031 --> 00:16:40,332
if I can still smell
your mom's boobs on your mouth.
371
00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:42,551
Why don't you go hump
a pile of garbage?
372
00:16:46,639 --> 00:16:49,091
All right, here we go.
Classic.
373
00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:52,094
Uh-oh.
374
00:16:55,881 --> 00:16:57,265
Oh, God! Brian! Brian!
375
00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:01,853
Guess I'm going for a ride.
376
00:17:09,729 --> 00:17:11,063
Why are we stopping?
377
00:17:12,281 --> 00:17:14,899
Oh, come on.
378
00:17:14,951 --> 00:17:19,554
For God's sake, Brian.
It's just a squirrel.
379
00:17:19,622 --> 00:17:20,756
Yeah!
380
00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:21,873
Oh, God!
381
00:17:27,697 --> 00:17:29,598
He can't hurt you anymore.
382
00:17:34,137 --> 00:17:35,704
Hey there, little fella.
383
00:17:35,772 --> 00:17:38,306
We sure got a lovely day for it,
don't we?
384
00:17:38,374 --> 00:17:40,175
Stay away from
my brother's butt.
385
00:17:41,944 --> 00:17:45,063
Okay, Stewie, let's get
that little face washed off.
386
00:17:45,131 --> 00:17:47,299
Then you can play
with your bath toys, huh?
387
00:17:47,367 --> 00:17:49,351
No, I hate getting
my face washed!
388
00:17:49,419 --> 00:17:51,153
Oh, look!
It's just Mr. Frog!
389
00:17:51,220 --> 00:17:53,071
Hello, Mr. Frog...
390
00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:56,808
My God, how the hell
do I keep falling for that?
391
00:17:56,876 --> 00:17:58,493
Now you play with your toys
392
00:17:58,561 --> 00:18:01,113
and I'll go get yo
a nice, fluffy towel.
393
00:18:01,180 --> 00:18:05,083
Stewart Griffin, explorer,
adventurer,
394
00:18:05,151 --> 00:18:07,302
skin-diving
international playboy.
395
00:18:13,843 --> 00:18:15,677
I'm swimming at night
'cause I'm a slut
396
00:18:15,762 --> 00:18:18,013
and now I'm paying
the price for it.
397
00:18:20,516 --> 00:18:22,267
Hey, Stewie!
398
00:18:22,335 --> 00:18:24,803
Wow, looks like you got
some cool bath toys in there.
399
00:18:24,871 --> 00:18:26,605
Is it okay if I join ya?
400
00:18:26,656 --> 00:18:28,273
No!
401
00:18:30,743 --> 00:18:32,811
Hey, is that
my froggie butt cloth?
402
00:18:35,648 --> 00:18:38,400
Okay, Stewie, bedtime's
in ten minutes.
403
00:18:38,468 --> 00:18:39,734
I'll be right back.
404
00:18:41,053 --> 00:18:42,788
Hmm. I think I have time
for a quickie.
405
00:18:52,331 --> 00:18:54,015
Excuse me, Mr. Cobain.
406
00:18:54,083 --> 00:18:55,183
Look, I know
you're depressed.
407
00:18:55,251 --> 00:18:57,452
Made some bad choices
with women,
408
00:18:57,520 --> 00:18:58,737
but there's another way.
409
00:18:58,805 --> 00:19:01,323
Haagen-Dazs,
lots of Haagen-Dazs.
410
00:19:05,795 --> 00:19:07,279
Well, let's see if it worked.
411
00:19:07,346 --> 00:19:08,814
Here we go.
412
00:19:08,881 --> 00:19:11,533
Ha! You're still alive,
you fat.
413
00:19:11,601 --> 00:19:13,785
Okay, Stewie, time for bed.
414
00:19:13,853 --> 00:19:15,871
You want Mommy to read you
a night-night story?
415
00:19:15,938 --> 00:19:17,839
Oh, how 'bout this one?
416
00:19:17,907 --> 00:19:21,793
"Good Night, Townfrom Footloose"?
417
00:19:28,367 --> 00:19:29,968
Who is this book for?
418
00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:40,145
Hey, Lois.
I'm home from the Clam.
419
00:19:40,212 --> 00:19:41,897
You know what that means.
420
00:19:41,981 --> 00:19:44,866
You spent the last ten minutes
parked in front of the house
421
00:19:44,934 --> 00:19:46,418
crying in your car?
422
00:19:46,486 --> 00:19:49,020
Not now, Peter. I'm doing
story time with Stewie.
423
00:19:49,088 --> 00:19:50,288
Yeah, scram, Drinky.
424
00:19:50,356 --> 00:19:51,656
I got a story.
425
00:19:51,724 --> 00:19:54,159
It's about the little penis
that could.
426
00:19:54,227 --> 00:19:56,261
It thinks it can, it thinks...
427
00:19:56,329 --> 00:19:58,029
In fact, it's pretty sure
it can.
428
00:19:58,097 --> 00:19:59,498
It-It, it's gonna.
429
00:19:59,565 --> 00:20:01,032
Hey, am I gonna have
to handle this?
430
00:20:01,083 --> 00:20:02,551
Do you want me
to handle this?
431
00:20:02,618 --> 00:20:03,552
Peter, just go wait
in the bedroom.
432
00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:05,170
I'll be right there.
433
00:20:05,237 --> 00:20:09,007
Fine, but if I gotta pee first,
this night's gonna be ruined.
434
00:20:09,074 --> 00:20:10,292
Ruined.
435
00:20:14,246 --> 00:20:16,097
Good night, sweetie.
Mommy loves you.
436
00:20:24,790 --> 00:20:26,258
Huh?
437
00:20:32,348 --> 00:20:34,182
It's big, isn't it?
438
00:20:34,250 --> 00:20:36,218
Yes, Peter.
It's very big.
439
00:20:36,285 --> 00:20:39,905
Yeah, it's big.
440
00:20:39,956 --> 00:20:42,290
Oh, God, yes!
441
00:20:42,358 --> 00:20:44,292
Ah, yes...
442
00:20:44,377 --> 00:20:46,478
Ah, yeah.
443
00:20:49,832 --> 00:20:53,844
Oh, you're gonna use that thing,
good. I love you so much.
444
00:20:53,944 --> 00:20:57,944
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
445
00:20:59,805 --> 00:21:03,537
WEBDL Sync: VeRdiKT
[Addic7ed.com]
32452
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