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1
00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:05,134
Mayday. Mayday. Mayday.
2
00:00:05,297 --> 00:00:09,052
This is Commander Kellogg of I. S.A.
Space Station Horizon.
3
00:00:10,093 --> 00:00:11,185
Transmission--
4
00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:14,064
--to Commander Drake.
Tony, the crew has--
5
00:00:14,932 --> 00:00:18,436
We are under-- I say again, we are under--
6
00:00:18,602 --> 00:00:20,070
7
00:00:20,229 --> 00:00:21,856
Croatoan!
8
00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:23,774
9
00:00:25,067 --> 00:00:26,785
And that, Mrs. Archer--
10
00:00:26,944 --> 00:00:28,196
"MS-II
Don't.
11
00:00:28,362 --> 00:00:31,741
Ah. "Ms." Archer, I beg your pardon.
Don't.
12
00:00:31,907 --> 00:00:34,626
That was the last transmission
from the Horizon.
13
00:00:34,785 --> 00:00:36,583
Which, obviously, pretty vague.
14
00:00:36,745 --> 00:00:40,750
Vague? You heard Commander Kellogg.
He said the Horizon is under attack.
15
00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:42,088
Well, under something.
16
00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:43,969
He could've been saying
"underfinanced."
17
00:00:44,127 --> 00:00:45,174
What?
Sterling...
18
00:00:45,337 --> 00:00:48,932
What, they're always whining about
needing more money for their boondocks.
19
00:00:49,091 --> 00:00:50,308
What? Doggies.
20
00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:53,016
You think space exploration
is a boondoggle?
21
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:55,268
Well, come on, in this economy?
22
00:00:55,430 --> 00:01:00,231
Exactly. Now, more than ever,
is when we need to look to space...
23
00:01:00,394 --> 00:01:02,817
...for the solution
to mankind's problems.
24
00:01:03,021 --> 00:01:08,403
In 200 years, Earth's population will
exceed her capacity to produce food.
25
00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:11,413
And even as the famines begin,
global war will erupt...
26
00:01:11,822 --> 00:01:14,826
...as fresh water
becomes scarcer than gold.
27
00:01:14,992 --> 00:01:19,998
But if we begin now, using the lessons
learned aboard Space Station Horizon...
28
00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:24,259
...a small group of brave colonists
can terraform Mars.
29
00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:27,922
And mankind can finally slip
the surly bonds of Earth...
30
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:31,342
...to live forever among the stars.
31
00:01:32,175 --> 00:01:33,518
Yeah, Lana.
Wha--?
32
00:01:33,677 --> 00:01:35,395
Jesus, read a book once in your life.
33
00:01:35,554 --> 00:01:38,273
So where does ISIS fit in, commander?
Well--
34
00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:41,732
I think that's a bit premature
until we discuss our fee structure.
35
00:01:41,893 --> 00:01:44,362
As to that,
you can name your price.
36
00:01:44,521 --> 00:01:47,274
Oh, now they've got--
Enough.
37
00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:49,864
Commander? As to our role?
38
00:01:50,027 --> 00:01:54,624
Horizon has an international crew.
American, German, Chinese, French--
39
00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:55,828
ARCHER:
Ba-dum-bum!
40
00:01:55,991 --> 00:01:58,995
Uh, sorry.
I thought "French" was a joke.
41
00:01:59,161 --> 00:02:01,789
Is mutiny funny to you, Mr. Archer?
42
00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:04,299
I don't know,
maybe a mutiny of clowns.
43
00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:08,008
Because I fear that one faction,
led by radical nationalists, has mutinied.
44
00:02:08,170 --> 00:02:09,217
But who? Which one?
45
00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:12,554
If he knew, he would tell us.
Read a book.
46
00:02:12,716 --> 00:02:15,595
And since I don't know
which faction is behind the mutiny--
47
00:02:15,761 --> 00:02:16,887
If there even was one.
48
00:02:17,054 --> 00:02:21,184
--I can't trust anyone at the I.S.A.
which is why I came to ISIS.
49
00:02:21,350 --> 00:02:22,897
Because of our loyalty.
50
00:02:23,060 --> 00:02:25,563
Or lack thereof.
Or whatever.
51
00:02:25,729 --> 00:02:28,278
Because I need a small cadre
of highly trained agents...
52
00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:31,660
...to fly into orbit and help me
retake control of Horizon.
53
00:02:31,860 --> 00:02:33,612
Nope. Archer.
Yep. Lana.
54
00:02:33,779 --> 00:02:36,407
He just said "highly trained."
And last time I checked...
55
00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:39,201
...none of us were even lowly trained
to be astronauts.
56
00:02:39,368 --> 00:02:40,620
Well, how hard could it be?
57
00:02:40,786 --> 00:02:41,833
Incredibly.
58
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,248
But since apparently
money is no object...
59
00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:46,963
The training schedule will
have to be highly compressed.
60
00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:49,548
The shuttle Intrepid
is launching in three days.
61
00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:52,430
And I won't lie to you.
This mission will be dangerous.
62
00:02:52,589 --> 00:02:56,219
Would you say we'd be venturing
into a zone of danger?
63
00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:57,932
Well, yes, obviously.
64
00:02:58,095 --> 00:02:59,893
No, I mean how
would you phrase that?
65
00:03:00,055 --> 00:03:02,899
L-- The zone will be one of danger?
66
00:03:03,058 --> 00:03:06,028
No, I mean-- Not--
If you'd say the thing--
67
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:07,233
Forget it. Never mind.
68
00:03:07,396 --> 00:03:09,569
And you never mind
and also shut up.
69
00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,820
ARCHER:
Ow! Jesus, Krieger, that's the bone.
70
00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:53,693
Oh, the mean doctor takes the widdle baby's
blood, and widdle baby goes-- Ow!
71
00:03:53,859 --> 00:03:58,080
You're a baby. And astronaut training
sucks complete ass. Literally.
72
00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:00,661
What is the deal with all the enemas?
Uh...
73
00:04:00,824 --> 00:04:02,371
And why do you need
so much blood?
74
00:04:02,534 --> 00:04:04,286
Wait.
Now that I think about it, why--
75
00:04:04,453 --> 00:04:06,205
Why is this man
in the restricted area?
76
00:04:06,371 --> 00:04:07,714
Who? Him?
77
00:04:07,873 --> 00:04:09,420
You.
Krieger.
78
00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:12,052
Uh, smoke bomb!
79
00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:14,842
And why aren't you
with the other trainees?
80
00:04:15,005 --> 00:04:19,351
I was told I had to undergo a bunch
of extremely invasive medical tests.
81
00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:22,433
Well, normally you would,
but by our doctors.
82
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:25,315
But since you're on such
an accelerated training schedule--
83
00:04:25,474 --> 00:04:28,102
Six enemas is a luxury
we can ill afford. Got it.
84
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:31,772
Six?
Who knows? He put me under. Maybe 12.
85
00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:35,613
Now you've wasted half a day,
so the other trainees are way ahead of you.
86
00:04:35,776 --> 00:04:37,744
ARCHER:
Not for long they're not.
87
00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:39,701
88
00:04:39,863 --> 00:04:42,207
Well, he's eager, I'll give him that.
89
00:04:42,365 --> 00:04:47,041
Well, you inspire him. With all those
medals on that powerful chest.
90
00:04:47,204 --> 00:04:50,549
Your wife is a very lucky--
Oh. I'm a widower.
91
00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:54,211
Oh. Difficult to meet people, isn't it,
in jobs like ours?
92
00:04:54,377 --> 00:04:58,302
I only mention it because
I also happen to be single.
93
00:04:58,507 --> 00:05:00,259
Yes, I know.
94
00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:02,177
Excuse me.
95
00:05:05,263 --> 00:05:06,731
96
00:05:09,893 --> 00:05:11,987
I hope to God that was alcohol.
97
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:13,397
LANA: No.
Yes.
98
00:05:13,563 --> 00:05:16,237
Damn it, Archer.
It's my turn. Cyril.
99
00:05:16,399 --> 00:05:18,743
Cyril, Drake said
let me fly it.
100
00:05:18,902 --> 00:05:21,576
Cut it out, Archer. I'm landing.
COMPUTER: Fifty meters, 40...
101
00:05:21,738 --> 00:05:23,661
Come on, baby, keep that nose up.
102
00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:25,622
COMPUTER:
...30 meters...
103
00:05:25,784 --> 00:05:28,708
Aah! What the--?
COMPUTER: Explosive decompression.
104
00:05:28,870 --> 00:05:30,087
105
00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:31,414
ARCHER:
Happy, Cyril?
106
00:05:31,581 --> 00:05:33,583
You just destroyed Alderaan.
107
00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:37,095
Damn it, that was closer than
any of us have gotten to actually landing.
108
00:05:37,254 --> 00:05:41,680
A, because you're all crap. And B,
who cares? We're not gonna land it.
109
00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:43,890
What the hell--
DRAKE: ls going on in here?
110
00:05:44,052 --> 00:05:47,056
Archer--
Saw an electrical fire in the simulator.
111
00:05:47,222 --> 00:05:50,066
And knowing that my colleague's
life was in danger, I--
112
00:05:50,225 --> 00:05:51,272
Acted without thinking.
113
00:05:51,434 --> 00:05:53,562
As always.
Not always.
114
00:05:53,728 --> 00:05:55,696
Well, thank God you did.
115
00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:57,529
What--?
But almost always.
116
00:05:57,691 --> 00:06:01,696
Because that's exactly the kind
of decisive action this mission calls for.
117
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,159
You could all learn from him.
118
00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:04,698
Oh, my God.
Come on.
119
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:08,620
Starting with a little training exercise
we lightheartedly call...
120
00:06:08,785 --> 00:06:10,628
...the Vomit Comet!
121
00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:12,289
122
00:06:12,622 --> 00:06:14,795
And if you're wondering why
we call it that...
123
00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,426
124
00:06:16,585 --> 00:06:18,303
GILLETTE:
It's all in my hair.
125
00:06:18,795 --> 00:06:20,342
CYRIL:
Oh, Jeezy H. Petes.
126
00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:22,303
ARCHER:
The hell is wrong with you, Lana?
127
00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:23,933
DRAKE:
That's why we call it that.
128
00:06:24,092 --> 00:06:28,814
What possible reason could there be
to subject human beings to--
129
00:06:28,972 --> 00:06:30,565
130
00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:35,145
Such mind-shattering
awesomeness!
131
00:06:35,312 --> 00:06:38,407
The KC-135 flies in a parabolic arc--
132
00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:40,818
Ha, ha. Who cares?
133
00:06:40,984 --> 00:06:44,989
--Which allows us to achieve
weightlessness for about 30 seconds.
134
00:06:45,155 --> 00:06:47,999
We'll do this 20 times...
ARCHER: Whoo!
135
00:06:48,158 --> 00:06:49,250
Weightlessness!
136
00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:52,538
...so you can get acquainted
with the sensation of being weightless.
137
00:06:52,704 --> 00:06:56,004
It takes some time getting used to, but--
Ow.
138
00:06:56,166 --> 00:06:58,294
Agent Kane, are you all right?
139
00:06:58,460 --> 00:07:00,087
Yep, yep, Yep-
140
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,926
What is going on with you?
141
00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:03,135
Do not like.
142
00:07:03,298 --> 00:07:06,723
What, are you crazy?
What's not to-- Oh.
143
00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,645
No. Archer, no!
144
00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:11,602
Yes!
Please don't do this.
145
00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:14,689
What's that? Sorry, I couldn't hear
you over the sound of the--
146
00:07:14,851 --> 00:07:16,694
147
00:07:18,188 --> 00:07:19,235
Come on!
148
00:07:19,397 --> 00:07:22,901
Looking good! Only 19 more to go!
149
00:07:23,526 --> 00:07:26,200
LANA:
Nineteen more times...
150
00:07:26,363 --> 00:07:30,334
...until there was literally
no more fluid left in my body.
151
00:07:30,492 --> 00:07:32,711
And thanks so much for that.
Cyril.
152
00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:35,964
She's not the one who kept riding
you into it, holding your mouth open.
153
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:39,046
Jeez. Even in zero gravity,
you're an asshole.
154
00:07:39,209 --> 00:07:42,088
You were saying?
To the wet-towel wielding survivor...
155
00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:44,676
...of 15 years of boarding school
locker rooms?
156
00:07:44,839 --> 00:07:45,965
Wait, 15?
157
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:47,554
Or whatever. The normal number.
158
00:07:47,717 --> 00:07:49,014
Twelve?
DRAKE: Yes.
159
00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:50,394
We will launch in 12 hours.
160
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:53,682
We received another transmission
from the Horizon. They can't wait.
161
00:07:53,848 --> 00:07:56,897
But we haven't been trained properly!
To what? Wear a seat belt?
162
00:07:57,060 --> 00:07:59,108
Actually,
is it a five-point harness, or--?
163
00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:01,898
I admit this isn't
an ideal scenario.
164
00:08:02,065 --> 00:08:04,784
Speaking of, what's the scenario
when we get to the Horizon?
165
00:08:04,943 --> 00:08:06,820
We don't have a tactical plan. We don't--
166
00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:09,536
Plenty of time to discuss
our plan during the flight.
167
00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:12,247
But--
Lana. What has gotten into you?
168
00:08:12,409 --> 00:08:14,252
More like what
got out of her.
169
00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:18,336
Sir, I'm not sure Lana-- Sorry, honey--
is physically capable of spaceflight.
170
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:21,502
Ray. Actually,
I might not be cut out for it.
171
00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:24,467
I'm sorry to hear that,
Agent Kane.
172
00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:26,260
Because you're going.
173
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:33,764
174
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:35,640
To a zone...
175
00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:38,606
...which is one of danger.
176
00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:40,566
177
00:08:44,899 --> 00:08:47,277
COMPUTER:
T-minus 90 seconds.
178
00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:49,617
DRAKE:
Roger, Control. All systems are go.
179
00:08:49,779 --> 00:08:51,452
Next stop, Horizon.
180
00:08:51,614 --> 00:08:52,706
Okay. Archer?
181
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:54,960
I'm sorry.
Are you talking to me?
182
00:08:55,118 --> 00:08:57,746
Or to her?
Who-- Why is she here?
183
00:08:57,912 --> 00:09:00,085
MALORY: Because Tony invited me.
ARCHER: Tony?
184
00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:03,001
You trying to get my mother
into the Million-Mile-High Club?
185
00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:04,420
Sterling.
Archer.
186
00:09:04,586 --> 00:09:08,307
Would you calm the hell down?
I am calm! I'm also out of here.
187
00:09:08,465 --> 00:09:09,967
Take your hands off
that harness.
188
00:09:10,133 --> 00:09:12,477
Make me.
And just so you know.
189
00:09:12,635 --> 00:09:13,682
She-- Aah!
190
00:09:14,137 --> 00:09:15,480
Can't breathe.
191
00:09:15,638 --> 00:09:19,142
MAN : Flight, we're showing
suit number two with an O2 malfunction.
192
00:09:19,309 --> 00:09:21,778
Double-check that.
I'm showing green across the board.
193
00:09:21,936 --> 00:09:24,815
MAN: Stand by.
DRAKE: That's a roger, standing by.
194
00:09:24,981 --> 00:09:26,073
195
00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:28,530
MALORY:
Tony, please. He'll behave.
196
00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:30,070
Won't he?
197
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:31,617
DRAKE:
Excellent.
198
00:09:31,780 --> 00:09:32,827
199
00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:37,244
Because I won't-- I can't-- let anyone
jeopardize the success of this mission.
200
00:09:37,786 --> 00:09:42,587
MAN: Flight, O2 on suit two is showing normal.
But keep an eye on it.
201
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:44,342
Oh, I will.
202
00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:46,674
Hooray.
Resume countdown, Control.
203
00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:47,837
MAN:
Roger, Flight.
204
00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:50,006
COMPUTER:
T-minus five, four...
205
00:09:50,173 --> 00:09:51,641
Exciting, isn't it?
...three...
206
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:53,552
...two, one.
207
00:09:53,718 --> 00:09:54,765
I think it is.
208
00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:56,020
COMPUTER:
Ignition.
209
00:09:57,472 --> 00:09:58,689
MAN:
Liftoff.
210
00:10:01,309 --> 00:10:02,356
211
00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:04,942
Just relax and rely on your training.
212
00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:06,698
Which we didn't have!
213
00:10:06,856 --> 00:10:08,858
Because Phase Two is a little rough.
214
00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:10,743
ARCHER:
Phase Two? What's Phase--?
215
00:10:10,902 --> 00:10:12,654
216
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,244
217
00:10:15,907 --> 00:10:18,410
218
00:10:19,369 --> 00:10:21,167
That was Phase Two.
219
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:22,668
Did not like.
220
00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:24,583
Wait till you see Phase Three.
221
00:10:24,749 --> 00:10:26,001
ALL:
What's Phase Three?
222
00:10:26,167 --> 00:10:28,545
I'm kidding. There is no Phase Three.
223
00:10:29,003 --> 00:10:30,220
Just a little space humor.
224
00:10:30,380 --> 00:10:31,973
ARCHER:
Yeah, funny stuff.
225
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:33,224
DRAKE:
Right?
226
00:10:33,550 --> 00:10:34,551
Right, then.
227
00:10:34,717 --> 00:10:37,891
I want to brief you all on what to
expect when we dock with Horizon.
228
00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:40,557
Uh, can we expect a pharmacy?
229
00:10:40,723 --> 00:10:42,350
Lana, it's not a strip mall.
230
00:10:42,517 --> 00:10:44,235
Although,
I assume there's a bar?
231
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:47,068
A bar?
Or, whatever. Cantina?
232
00:10:47,397 --> 00:10:49,741
Uh, no. Please pay attention.
233
00:10:49,899 --> 00:10:53,403
We'll dock here, move forward
on foot toward Horizon's bridge--
234
00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:54,742
Wait, on foot?
235
00:10:54,904 --> 00:10:57,248
Horizon has artificial gravity.
236
00:10:57,407 --> 00:11:00,581
Look. See how it spins
on its longitudinal axis?
237
00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:01,790
Lana, look at it spin.
238
00:11:01,953 --> 00:11:03,000
239
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:05,916
When we reach the bridge,
we'll retake control of Horizon.
240
00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:09,928
But we can expect heavy resistance.
I'm sure the mutineers are armed.
241
00:11:10,086 --> 00:11:11,929
With what, slide rules and Tang?
242
00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:16,434
The M-41 Mark Two plasma-pulse rifle
with concussion grenade launcher.
243
00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:17,765
Holy shit!
244
00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:21,852
On "kill" mode, the M-41 fires
lethal plasma ammunition.
245
00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:25,770
On "stun," it fires an ion pulse,
similar to an EMP.
246
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:28,067
And can it be fired with an erection?
247
00:11:28,229 --> 00:11:29,902
Oh, for God's sake.
Archer! Muzzle!
248
00:11:30,064 --> 00:11:31,566
Relax, it's on stun, Lana.
249
00:11:31,733 --> 00:11:33,952
Careful. Even on stun, it can--
250
00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:35,578
251
00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:37,705
Oops.
252
00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:39,616
Clear.
Clear!
253
00:11:40,450 --> 00:11:42,794
Ow!
254
00:11:43,578 --> 00:11:47,458
As I was saying,
it's possible for the EMP to stop a man's heart.
255
00:11:47,624 --> 00:11:50,878
So "stun" may be a bit
of a misnomer.
256
00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:52,091
Damn it, Archer.
257
00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:53,846
I'm not the one
who was all sweaty.
258
00:11:54,005 --> 00:11:57,600
Mr. Archer, that's twice you've
jeopardized the success of this mission.
259
00:11:57,759 --> 00:11:59,136
There will not be a third.
260
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:01,976
MAN :
Uh, flight, we have a problem.
261
00:12:02,263 --> 00:12:03,765
Well, don't look at me.
262
00:12:03,932 --> 00:12:05,104
DRAKE:
My God.
263
00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:09,146
On this trajectory, we'll miss Horizon.
Control, what happened?
264
00:12:09,312 --> 00:12:12,407
MAN: Burn rates were good.
Flight, uh, stand by.
265
00:12:13,358 --> 00:12:16,487
Uh, flight, we're showing
that you are grossly overweight.
266
00:12:16,653 --> 00:12:17,825
PAM:
Oh, for--
267
00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:20,957
I wouldn't say grossly.
CHERYL: I would.
268
00:12:21,115 --> 00:12:25,837
DRAKE: I would be well within my rights
to jettison both of you into space.
269
00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:27,497
Well within them.
Malory.
270
00:12:27,664 --> 00:12:30,668
However, for, uh, numerous reasons...
271
00:12:30,833 --> 00:12:33,507
...one being,
this ship can't actually do that...
272
00:12:33,670 --> 00:12:35,172
...I've decided take you with us.
273
00:12:35,338 --> 00:12:36,385
274
00:12:36,547 --> 00:12:38,595
But I want to know how
you got aboard.
275
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:40,852
What do you mean, how?
Mr. Ar--
276
00:12:41,719 --> 00:12:42,766
Archer! Whoa!
277
00:12:42,929 --> 00:12:45,398
Yeah, so that safety is tricky, huh?
278
00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:47,438
Clear.
Clear!
279
00:12:48,351 --> 00:12:49,443
PAM:
Ow!
280
00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:50,728
281
00:12:50,895 --> 00:12:52,112
Awesome.
282
00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:54,274
Son of a shit-snacking whore.
283
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:55,817
Mr. Figgis.
284
00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:59,363
Lock that man in the cargo hold.
285
00:12:59,529 --> 00:13:00,576
Who, me?
286
00:13:00,738 --> 00:13:02,331
Aye-freaking-aye.
287
00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:03,787
Ms. Archer.
288
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:07,454
In case I need to sterilize something.
DRAKE: Get strapped in.
289
00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:10,339
Agent Gillette,
monitor this woman's vital signs.
290
00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:13,718
Agent Kane, come with me. I may
need some help getting us to Horizon.
291
00:13:14,711 --> 00:13:18,636
So that we don't die writhing in agony,
when we run out of oxygen.
292
00:13:18,798 --> 00:13:20,675
Yeah, been there. No picnic.
293
00:13:20,842 --> 00:13:23,470
Uh, speaking of, great for picnics.
294
00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:26,059
The tofu teriyaki, not so much.
295
00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:27,895
CHERYL:
There's teriyaki?
296
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:30,230
CYRIL: No.
Cyril, come on, let me out.
297
00:13:30,393 --> 00:13:33,818
No, you jerk. You shoot me
in the heart with a space-blaster?
298
00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:36,153
Are you k-- You're still mad about that?
299
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:40,162
Not to mention whatever idiot reason
you had for smuggling Pam on board.
300
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:44,575
You're screwing him, aren't you?
What? Yes.
301
00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:48,917
No! Because if we don't die,
for all I care, you can rot in there.
302
00:13:49,078 --> 00:13:51,547
ARCHER:
Cyril? Cyril!
303
00:13:51,706 --> 00:13:56,507
Well, good luck fighting a bunch of--
whatever-- space-pirates without me.
304
00:13:59,589 --> 00:14:00,841
305
00:14:01,007 --> 00:14:03,101
**** you, space.
306
00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:12,644
DRAKE:
Come on, baby, just a few more seconds!
307
00:14:14,312 --> 00:14:15,564
Damn it!
308
00:14:16,272 --> 00:14:19,776
I don't know if that was a long enough burn.
Agent Kane, I need a readout.
309
00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:23,326
Ugh! For God's sakes, woman.
Dramamine!
310
00:14:23,488 --> 00:14:26,458
It makes me sleepy.
I think we're okay, sir.
311
00:14:26,616 --> 00:14:29,244
Thank God,
because we're out of fuel.
312
00:14:29,410 --> 00:14:31,708
What? How are we gonna
get back to Earth?
313
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:34,420
There is fuel. On Horizon.
314
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:36,630
Well, I didn't know that.
315
00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:39,592
Flight computer will dock the ship.
Assemble boarding party.
316
00:14:39,754 --> 00:14:43,099
Nor was I told there would be a party.
Lana, what are you wearing?
317
00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:45,476
DRAKE:
Bio-matrix composite body armor.
318
00:14:45,635 --> 00:14:49,265
Effective against small-arms fire.
And we need all the help we can get.
319
00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:50,977
Since there's only four of us.
320
00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:53,643
Yeah, that seems
kind of few.
321
00:14:53,810 --> 00:14:55,232
If you need help, I'll--
DRAKE: No.
322
00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:58,114
We can't jeopardize the women.
323
00:14:58,314 --> 00:14:59,987
Cough.
Well, not you.
324
00:15:00,149 --> 00:15:04,450
No, Agent Kane, I'm afraid
your particular skill-set outweighs your--
325
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:05,829
326
00:15:05,988 --> 00:15:07,956
COM P UTER:
Docking complete.
327
00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:09,409
Is that a ghost?
Nope.
328
00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:11,452
Boarding party, into the airlock.
329
00:15:11,661 --> 00:15:13,254
COMPUTER:
Gravity engaged.
330
00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:16,166
Weapons on stun.
Fast and hard to the bridge.
331
00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:19,506
And remember, these are
mutineers. Even if they try to--
332
00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:23,799
suppressing fire!
333
00:15:26,843 --> 00:15:30,222
Ugh. Otherwise, just follow me.
334
00:15:30,388 --> 00:15:33,107
And try not to shoot me in the--
Oh, shit.
335
00:15:33,266 --> 00:15:35,268
What the hell?
ls wrong with me?
336
00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:38,689
It's the artificial gravity.
You have to readjust to it.
337
00:15:38,855 --> 00:15:41,108
I'll get my inner ear right on that.
338
00:15:41,274 --> 00:15:42,867
We don't have time for this.
339
00:15:43,025 --> 00:15:44,072
MAN:
There they are!
340
00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:46,704
Drop your weapons. Drop your weapons!
341
00:15:46,863 --> 00:15:48,365
Suppressing--
342
00:15:48,531 --> 00:15:50,499
343
00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:53,377
Uh, so does this
run on batteries, or--?
344
00:15:53,536 --> 00:15:55,789
Fire!
Aah!
345
00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:57,791
346
00:15:58,332 --> 00:15:59,925
Get them! Get them!
347
00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:01,552
Get them!
MAN: Fire!
348
00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:02,928
We're pinned down!
349
00:16:03,254 --> 00:16:04,722
Oh, really?
350
00:16:04,881 --> 00:16:06,224
You don't think I could rock this?
351
00:16:06,382 --> 00:16:08,726
Ahem. Couple things.
352
00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:10,728
One, I don't know what that means.
353
00:16:10,887 --> 00:16:13,060
And two-- Hang on.
354
00:16:13,723 --> 00:16:15,225
Hang on.
355
00:16:15,933 --> 00:16:17,560
Hang on.
356
00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:20,362
Hang on.
357
00:16:20,521 --> 00:16:22,194
358
00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:29,414
And two, you obviously
don't know what "boarding party" means.
359
00:16:29,572 --> 00:16:33,076
Who am I, 16th century
female Irish pirate Gréinne O'Malley?
360
00:16:33,242 --> 00:16:35,961
Ah! Or her sole female descendant.
361
00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:37,167
ARCHER:
I'm sorry.
362
00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:40,550
For what? Space-blastering me
in the fricking tits?
363
00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:44,383
Or tricking me into that fart-locker
to get blasted into outer goddamn space...
364
00:16:44,545 --> 00:16:47,424
...on the off chance
you might want to bang me?
365
00:16:47,924 --> 00:16:49,392
Both, I guess. Look--
366
00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:53,271
After you blew me off for Katya,
the big-titted cyborg.
367
00:16:53,429 --> 00:16:54,726
Little Miss, uh...
368
00:16:54,889 --> 00:16:56,186
RZ-double-DZ?
369
00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:57,396
Ha, ha, nice.
370
00:16:57,558 --> 00:17:00,778
Thanks. And I'm sorry,
but you gotta let me out, Pam.
371
00:17:00,937 --> 00:17:03,941
They're fighting space-pirates
out there. With Cyril.
372
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,450
You're supposed to fire!
373
00:17:06,609 --> 00:17:08,111
What is wrong with you?
374
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:09,950
ARCHER:
And Lana can't even stand up.
375
00:17:10,112 --> 00:17:11,614
You idiot, just reset the--
376
00:17:11,781 --> 00:17:12,907
377
00:17:13,074 --> 00:17:15,452
Jesus, you're like a dog in a station wagon.
378
00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:16,707
379
00:17:16,911 --> 00:17:18,959
No. We're losing the beachhead.
380
00:17:19,121 --> 00:17:22,671
ARCHER: They're running out of time, Pam.
Oh, all right.
381
00:17:24,418 --> 00:17:26,170
That being said...
382
00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:27,929
Quickie?
383
00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:29,640
Meh.
384
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:33,432
Whoo! Okay, good luck.
385
00:17:33,594 --> 00:17:37,269
Thanks. Normally, I'd say I don't need
it, but I can barely feel my legs.
386
00:17:37,431 --> 00:17:39,900
I call that the MOAB. it stands for--
387
00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:43,814
I know what it stands for.
I was there. Please don't say it out loud.
388
00:17:43,980 --> 00:17:46,483
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I need to...
389
00:17:48,734 --> 00:17:51,863
Kick some space-pirate ass!
Whoo!
390
00:17:52,154 --> 00:17:54,156
ALL: Archer?
Hang on.
391
00:17:54,323 --> 00:17:57,702
Yes, Archer, duh. And if you're done
doing each other's hair, let's--
392
00:17:57,868 --> 00:17:59,836
DRAKE:
Retake the ship!
393
00:17:59,996 --> 00:18:02,419
Or just run around
interrupting people.
394
00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:04,505
DRAKE:
Aah! I'm hit, I'm hit!
395
00:18:04,667 --> 00:18:05,759
Oh, for--
396
00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:09,055
Do I have to do everything?
397
00:18:09,338 --> 00:18:12,182
He asked, intending to be facetious.
398
00:18:12,341 --> 00:18:14,810
LANA: I'm sorry.
I don't know what's wrong with me.
399
00:18:14,969 --> 00:18:17,313
Besides suffering from gigantism?
Shut up.
400
00:18:17,471 --> 00:18:19,519
The bridge! We have to make it to the--
401
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:23,687
ARCHER: The bridge. Yes, I heard you.
So unless we're going the wrong way...
402
00:18:24,061 --> 00:18:25,654
DRAKE:
No, that's it right there.
403
00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:27,690
Then shut up. God.
404
00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:29,734
Okay, now what?
You can un-shut up.
405
00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:31,902
The com-link, by the door.
406
00:18:32,194 --> 00:18:34,322
Commander Kellogg? It's Drake.
407
00:18:34,488 --> 00:18:36,866
Tony?
ARCHER : "Tony"?
408
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:41,378
Oh, my God, am I glad to see you.
We couldn't have held out much longer.
409
00:18:41,537 --> 00:18:43,710
Well, we got here as fast as we could.
410
00:18:43,873 --> 00:18:45,921
My God, you're wounded.
Put him here.
411
00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:48,051
Please, we'll take those.
412
00:18:48,210 --> 00:18:50,304
ARCHER :
Yeah, and here you go.
413
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:52,056
KELLOGG:
Oh, dear, are you wounded too?
414
00:18:52,214 --> 00:18:54,512
No, just--
DRAKE: Just a little space-sickness.
415
00:18:54,675 --> 00:18:56,222
Eventually,
she'll get acclimated.
416
00:18:56,385 --> 00:18:58,058
I'm-- Eventually?
417
00:18:58,220 --> 00:19:01,224
Yes, she's strong.
Good breeding stock.
418
00:19:01,390 --> 00:19:04,564
Hey!
Whoa, Charles Benedict Davenport.
419
00:19:04,727 --> 00:19:07,526
Uh, the father of eugenics.
420
00:19:07,688 --> 00:19:09,031
Seriously, guys,
read a book.
421
00:19:09,190 --> 00:19:13,570
And two more on the Intrepid.
Stowaways, almost as good as her.
422
00:19:13,736 --> 00:19:17,661
Two more? Then we can populate Mars
even faster than we'd hoped.
423
00:19:17,823 --> 00:19:20,246
CYRIL & GILLETTE: What?
Did you say "Mars"?
424
00:19:20,409 --> 00:19:22,082
Oh, now your ears--
425
00:19:22,244 --> 00:19:24,042
Wait, why did you
say Mars?
426
00:19:24,205 --> 00:19:25,422
MAN:
Don't you see?
427
00:19:25,581 --> 00:19:26,958
428
00:19:27,124 --> 00:19:30,094
They're the mutineers. Aah!
429
00:19:33,756 --> 00:19:35,053
430
00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:36,593
Welcome to the...
431
00:19:38,886 --> 00:19:41,059
...Danger Zone.
432
00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:19,218
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