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Hi. I'm checking out.
14322.
49
00:03:30,768 --> 00:03:33,203
Mr. Schaffer?
50
00:03:33,271 --> 00:03:35,773
That's me.
51
00:03:35,839 --> 00:03:38,876
I have your bill right here.
Great. Thank you.
52
00:03:38,942 --> 00:03:43,414
How was your luck last night?
I don't...
I didn't gamble.
53
00:03:43,481 --> 00:03:47,551
I was just here for
a friend's bachelor party.
I guess he's the gambler.
54
00:03:47,618 --> 00:03:49,987
Uh...
55
00:03:50,053 --> 00:03:53,657
What's this $110?
56
00:03:53,724 --> 00:03:58,128
Those are your
in-room movies.
I didn't watch any movies.
57
00:03:58,195 --> 00:04:02,065
Okay, let's see.
Afro Whores.
58
00:04:02,132 --> 00:04:04,335
Afro Whores?
59
00:04:04,402 --> 00:04:07,738
You watched it... let's see...
Uh, 11 times.
60
00:04:07,805 --> 00:04:09,807
No. No, no...
61
00:04:09,873 --> 00:04:14,678
Afro Whores, 2:30.
Afro Whores, 4:00.
Afro Whores, 5:30.
62
00:04:14,745 --> 00:04:18,215
It says in the morning
you watched The Grinch
for ten minutes...
63
00:04:18,282 --> 00:04:20,083
and then switched back
over to Afro Whores.
64
00:04:20,150 --> 00:04:23,321
I swear I didn't watch it.
I was at a bachelor party.
65
00:04:23,387 --> 00:04:25,623
There were 35 people there.
You can ask any of them.
66
00:04:25,689 --> 00:04:28,526
You have to take that
off my record.
This is not a record, sir.
67
00:04:28,592 --> 00:04:33,030
It's a delete.
Okay, fine. How many times
did you watch it?
68
00:04:33,096 --> 00:04:35,933
None! I didn't watch it.
69
00:04:35,999 --> 00:04:40,103
Are you sure?
"Sizzling, three-way,
backdoor action,
70
00:04:40,170 --> 00:04:42,540
featuring
two sexy soul sisters..."
71
00:04:42,606 --> 00:04:45,409
I don't need to know
what it's about.
I did not watch it.
72
00:04:46,944 --> 00:04:50,147
I didn't.
73
00:04:50,213 --> 00:04:54,752
Drove 500,
and Chipper Jones struck out
in that key situation.
74
00:04:54,818 --> 00:04:58,756
He's 0 for 5,
lost three straight games.
75
00:04:58,822 --> 00:05:03,060
This month he has
a one-game winning streak.
76
00:05:05,763 --> 00:05:10,668
Miss? Miss, can I have
another one of these, please?
77
00:05:10,734 --> 00:05:14,772
Oh, sorry.
I thought you were a woman.
78
00:05:14,838 --> 00:05:16,940
I am a woman.
79
00:05:18,809 --> 00:05:21,178
You know, you look
kind of familiar.
80
00:05:21,244 --> 00:05:23,747
Yeah, you do.
81
00:05:23,814 --> 00:05:26,850
You know, I get that
all the time.
82
00:05:26,917 --> 00:05:29,319
I guess I just have
one of those faces.
83
00:05:29,387 --> 00:05:33,123
And now for our
loser of the week.
This week it's a no-brainer.
84
00:05:33,190 --> 00:05:37,628
Referee Owen Templeton
made the biggest bonehead call
in the history of football.
85
00:05:37,695 --> 00:05:42,065
I think everyone remembers. It
happened last Sunday at Dallas
with the score tied at 10.
86
00:05:42,132 --> 00:05:44,502
They were headed towards
overtime. Everything was cool.
87
00:05:44,568 --> 00:05:46,613
They were about to toss the coin
to see who would kick off.
88
00:05:46,637 --> 00:05:50,240
Dallas, call it in the air.
Tails.
89
00:05:50,307 --> 00:05:52,843
That's heads.
That was tails.
90
00:05:52,910 --> 00:05:55,045
No, no, no.
It's, uh...
That was tails.
91
00:05:55,112 --> 00:05:58,449
No... Wait! Hang on!
It's, uh... Now,
what did I say?
92
00:05:58,516 --> 00:06:00,518
Tails!
It's tails.
93
00:06:00,584 --> 00:06:03,587
It's heads.
What are you doin'?
94
00:06:05,656 --> 00:06:08,459
You saw...
95
00:06:08,526 --> 00:06:11,228
Okay, little brother,
just be cool.
96
00:06:11,294 --> 00:06:13,363
Just be cool.
97
00:06:26,810 --> 00:06:30,213
Okay, this is it.
See that glass?
98
00:06:30,280 --> 00:06:33,851
Walk across the lobby,
slip on the glass,
let gravity do the rest.
99
00:06:33,917 --> 00:06:36,887
I might "eak" my neck.
100
00:06:36,954 --> 00:06:40,891
It's true.
You could break your neck.
It's a risk I'm willing to take.
101
00:06:40,958 --> 00:06:43,927
Why don't "oo" do it?
102
00:06:43,994 --> 00:06:46,964
Because, Einstein, one of us
needs to be the victim,
103
00:06:47,030 --> 00:06:49,900
and one of us needs
to be the witness.
104
00:06:49,967 --> 00:06:53,480
What kind of witness would you
make? I'm your own brother.
I don't know what you're sayin'.
105
00:06:53,504 --> 00:06:55,639
How's your tongue?
Let me see it.
106
00:06:59,176 --> 00:07:00,478
How's it look?
107
00:07:02,012 --> 00:07:06,349
It looks good.
It looks much better.
108
00:07:06,416 --> 00:07:08,752
Okay, here we go.
109
00:07:08,819 --> 00:07:13,123
- Uh...
- We're on Candid Camera,
so make it look good.
110
00:07:22,199 --> 00:07:26,870
Excuse me. I'm a lawyer.
Gloria Allred.
111
00:07:26,937 --> 00:07:29,607
What the hell happened here?
She slipped
on that glass.
112
00:07:29,673 --> 00:07:34,044
Those arrogant jerks. They're
gonna pay for this. They're
gonna pay through the nose.
113
00:07:34,111 --> 00:07:36,747
How's your neck? I've never
seen such negligence.
114
00:07:36,814 --> 00:07:38,916
This is going to be huge.
115
00:07:38,982 --> 00:07:40,851
She's an angel.
116
00:07:40,918 --> 00:07:44,454
What a cute little face.
Would you look at those cheeks?
117
00:07:44,522 --> 00:07:47,257
She's absolutely beautiful.
She has your eyes.
118
00:07:47,324 --> 00:07:51,361
It's the only picture I have
of her. It's all worn out
'cause I'm always looking at it.
119
00:07:51,428 --> 00:07:55,265
And you haven't seen her
for 27 years?
Not till today.
120
00:07:55,332 --> 00:07:58,435
She just called you
out of the blue?
No, I found her.
121
00:07:58,502 --> 00:08:03,206
I hired a detective.
I spent all my money,
and now we're going to meet.
122
00:08:03,273 --> 00:08:06,343
You think she'll recognize me?
Of course she will, won't she?
123
00:08:06,409 --> 00:08:08,478
Yeah.
She will.
124
00:08:29,299 --> 00:08:31,168
Vera Baker.
125
00:08:32,302 --> 00:08:34,337
My baby...
126
00:08:34,404 --> 00:08:37,908
Oh. Uh...
127
00:08:37,975 --> 00:08:41,679
- Excuse me.
- I have to take this.
128
00:08:41,745 --> 00:08:43,781
This is Merrill.
129
00:08:45,983 --> 00:08:48,285
No! That's unacceptable!
130
00:08:48,351 --> 00:08:52,089
Listen, tell Warren if we don't
ship by Tuesday, we won't be
in the stores by Mother's Day.
131
00:08:52,155 --> 00:08:55,025
That's unacceptable,
so don't give me
any excuses, and do it!
132
00:08:55,092 --> 00:08:57,995
Do it!
Just shut up and get it done!
133
00:09:00,631 --> 00:09:03,934
Oh, honey,
you broke your phone.
134
00:09:04,001 --> 00:09:08,271
It's okay.
I carry extras.
135
00:09:08,338 --> 00:09:11,809
Oh. Why don't we sit down?
136
00:09:11,875 --> 00:09:13,844
Yes.
137
00:09:21,919 --> 00:09:25,222
You probably have
a thousand questions for me.
138
00:09:25,288 --> 00:09:26,657
No.
139
00:09:26,724 --> 00:09:30,260
I was young.
I didn't tell anybody
I was pregnant.
140
00:09:30,327 --> 00:09:33,864
- And I felt I could handle it
at the time.
141
00:09:33,931 --> 00:09:38,936
Hi. Do you think you gals
could pull yourselves together
and bring us a drink?
142
00:09:39,002 --> 00:09:43,173
Oh. Sure.
Yeah. Sure.
What would you like?
143
00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:45,442
Mimosa.
144
00:09:45,508 --> 00:09:49,446
They both want a mimosa.
145
00:09:49,512 --> 00:09:53,150
So, you sell cosmetics?
146
00:09:53,216 --> 00:09:56,887
Yeah.
I have my own company.
Oh!
147
00:09:56,954 --> 00:09:59,857
And we're going public.
148
00:09:59,923 --> 00:10:03,026
And you're not married?
149
00:10:03,093 --> 00:10:06,596
Lucianne said you wouldn't.
Who?
150
00:10:06,664 --> 00:10:09,833
Lucianne. She's my psychic.
She's the one who told me
to come look for you.
151
00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:11,902
She said you needed me.
152
00:10:11,969 --> 00:10:15,639
She did?
She said you were lonely...
153
00:10:15,706 --> 00:10:21,278
and that you were worried
about money and that
you had trouble sleeping.
154
00:10:23,313 --> 00:10:27,651
Who the hell isn't?
155
00:10:33,023 --> 00:10:35,625
See? I told
you we didn't
need a bellman.
156
00:10:35,693 --> 00:10:39,562
Yeah, well,
congratulations, Randy.
You avoided another tip.
157
00:10:39,629 --> 00:10:41,699
Those nickels and dimes
add up, my dear.
158
00:10:41,765 --> 00:10:43,801
- I call this bed!
- Hey, no fair.
159
00:10:43,867 --> 00:10:46,036
You got to pick
last night.
Go to hell, Jason.
160
00:10:46,103 --> 00:10:48,005
Make me.
Hey, language, please.
161
00:10:48,071 --> 00:10:50,373
Bev, his and her
bathrobes.
Yes.
162
00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:52,275
Look at that view.
Yeah.
163
00:10:52,342 --> 00:10:57,247
Nice view.
Okay, honey.
Why don't you unpack?
164
00:10:57,314 --> 00:11:00,083
Okay.
I'm just gonna
go look around.
165
00:11:00,150 --> 00:11:03,854
Wait, wait, wait.
You're not going to the casino?
166
00:11:03,921 --> 00:11:07,357
No, no, of course not.
167
00:11:07,424 --> 00:11:11,328
I just drove
from the Grand Canyon.
Gotta stretch my legs.
168
00:11:11,394 --> 00:11:14,932
You swore to me on your
mother's eyes we are here
to see David Copperfield.
169
00:11:14,998 --> 00:11:18,635
No gambling.
No gambling.
I'm just lookin' around.
170
00:11:18,702 --> 00:11:23,073
In fact, I'm gonna go
to the gift shop.
171
00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:25,175
I can jump farther than you.
172
00:11:25,242 --> 00:11:27,745
I can jump farther.
No way. Watch.
173
00:11:27,811 --> 00:11:30,247
Ooh.
174
00:11:30,313 --> 00:11:33,984
That's gotta hurt.
Honey, kids need ya.
175
00:11:34,051 --> 00:11:36,353
Hey, Nick. Nicky!
Hey.
176
00:11:36,419 --> 00:11:38,722
You're not leaving?
I'm in court on Tuesday.
177
00:11:38,789 --> 00:11:42,325
No, you're not.
I work for people who are
in court on Tuesday.
178
00:11:42,392 --> 00:11:45,162
You pussy.
You can't leave.
It's still goin' on up there.
179
00:11:45,228 --> 00:11:47,597
Richie, I have to.
I've had two hours sleep.
180
00:11:47,664 --> 00:11:50,700
Steve Cunningham
just got another stripper.
You got to see this one.
181
00:11:50,768 --> 00:11:52,702
She's incredible.
I got to get back.
182
00:11:52,770 --> 00:11:55,939
No, you don't, Nick.
I know you. You're scared.
183
00:11:56,006 --> 00:11:58,842
You're scared it's gonna
get out of control up there.
184
00:11:58,909 --> 00:12:01,420
Someday you'll be up for
attorney general and it'll
come back to haunt you.
185
00:12:01,444 --> 00:12:04,647
I'm not having
this conversation.
You didn't even gamble.
186
00:12:04,714 --> 00:12:06,984
Not one quarter.
That's no way to live.
187
00:12:07,050 --> 00:12:10,053
In fact,
that ain't even livin'.
It's hiding.
188
00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:12,790
I'm not hiding
from anything.
Oh, no?
189
00:12:12,856 --> 00:12:15,325
Okay, then prove it.
190
00:12:15,392 --> 00:12:18,195
Do something, anything.
Break one rule.
191
00:12:18,261 --> 00:12:23,166
Here. Look. Nick, a paper.
Come on. Take it.
192
00:12:23,233 --> 00:12:27,037
Take it. Come on, Nick.
Take it.
193
00:12:27,104 --> 00:12:28,705
Aha.
194
00:12:28,772 --> 00:12:33,410
I have a plane
to catch, okay?
195
00:12:33,476 --> 00:12:36,046
I'll see you in Chicago.
196
00:12:37,747 --> 00:12:40,217
Oh, look, I won!
I won!
197
00:12:40,283 --> 00:12:42,385
Look at the money
comin' down.
198
00:12:42,452 --> 00:12:45,755
Oh, look. Look, look, look.
What's... What's...
199
00:12:45,823 --> 00:12:49,927
"You're a winner.
See guest services."
200
00:12:51,561 --> 00:12:54,297
What? A dollar?
201
00:12:54,364 --> 00:12:56,233
Ooh!
202
00:12:58,468 --> 00:13:00,503
Come on, baby.
Come on!
**
203
00:13:00,570 --> 00:13:03,073
Ya-hoo!
204
00:13:11,181 --> 00:13:13,283
**
205
00:13:15,652 --> 00:13:17,988
Come on.
206
00:13:18,055 --> 00:13:20,790
- **
- We won!
207
00:13:22,993 --> 00:13:28,131
We won one.
What is this?
This isn't money.
208
00:13:38,775 --> 00:13:40,577
**
209
00:13:46,349 --> 00:13:48,718
That's the prize?
A free buffet?
210
00:13:48,785 --> 00:13:50,787
Actually, it's not a buffet.
211
00:13:50,854 --> 00:13:54,624
It's a special reception
at 10:00 in the penthouse
conference room.
212
00:13:54,691 --> 00:13:57,194
- Oh!
- "Where a spectacular..."
213
00:13:57,260 --> 00:14:00,463
once-in-a-lifetime
opportunity awaits you."
214
00:14:00,530 --> 00:14:02,399
That's all I know.
215
00:14:02,465 --> 00:14:05,202
What do you think?
I think it's
some kind of scam.
216
00:14:05,268 --> 00:14:07,938
Oh, good! A scam!
We'll do it.
217
00:14:08,005 --> 00:14:11,008
- I'll need to see some I.D.
- Okay.
218
00:14:22,619 --> 00:14:26,223
- There. I gambled.
- **
219
00:14:32,829 --> 00:14:36,799
Family vacation, huh?
These are the moments
you got to savor, right?
220
00:14:36,866 --> 00:14:39,336
They'll never
come around again.
Exactly.
221
00:14:39,402 --> 00:14:42,072
Excuse me.
Do you know what's going on?
222
00:14:42,139 --> 00:14:44,007
Free grub.
That's what's going on.
223
00:14:44,074 --> 00:14:46,609
This room is fabulous.
224
00:14:46,676 --> 00:14:50,013
Excuse me. Does anybody
know what we're doing here?
Beats me.
225
00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:53,016
Oh, my God.
226
00:14:53,083 --> 00:14:55,118
You should sue somebody.
227
00:14:55,185 --> 00:14:57,287
I did it myself.
228
00:14:57,354 --> 00:15:00,323
What?
He said he did it himself.
Sent away for a kit.
229
00:15:00,390 --> 00:15:05,595
I knew I recognized you.
You're the referee...
the bonehead.
230
00:15:05,662 --> 00:15:09,266
Well, you know, that's
just the media blowing it
out of proportion.
231
00:15:09,332 --> 00:15:13,603
My hairdresser's husband
lost $800 because of you.
232
00:15:13,670 --> 00:15:16,206
Everybody thinks
we flip quarters.
Can I have a picture with you?
233
00:15:16,273 --> 00:15:18,441
It's really
a commemorative coin.
Look.
234
00:15:18,508 --> 00:15:20,410
Smile.
Please. You...
235
00:15:22,379 --> 00:15:26,984
Am I too late-a?
Look. I won a coin.
236
00:15:27,050 --> 00:15:32,155
A gold coin.
Oh, isn't this w-wonderful?
237
00:15:32,222 --> 00:15:34,491
Look at this r-room.
238
00:15:34,557 --> 00:15:39,762
What a beautiful room.
Have you seen this room?
239
00:15:39,829 --> 00:15:42,932
Yes! We're in it.
240
00:15:45,668 --> 00:15:48,205
I am Enrico Pollini.
241
00:15:48,271 --> 00:15:52,375
Now, I know what
you are thinking.
Enrico is a girl's name.
242
00:15:52,442 --> 00:15:55,312
No, I wasn't.
No pun intended.
243
00:15:55,378 --> 00:16:00,217
What pun is that?
Food. Look at all this food.
244
00:16:00,283 --> 00:16:05,755
What a beautiful party.
Little cockdoggies.
245
00:16:05,822 --> 00:16:07,757
They're called
cocktail wienies.
246
00:16:07,824 --> 00:16:12,762
Wienies. Ah!
I'm so sorry. My English
is not so good.
247
00:16:12,829 --> 00:16:15,498
But I'm learning.
Mmm!
248
00:16:15,565 --> 00:16:18,035
That's it. Vera.
We're outta here.
Huh?
249
00:16:18,101 --> 00:16:20,579
I just want to say good-bye.
Good-bye, y'all.
Excuse me.
250
00:16:20,603 --> 00:16:25,542
Thank you all for coming.
I'm Donald Sinclair.
I own this hotel.
251
00:16:25,608 --> 00:16:27,710
We don't have much time.
252
00:16:27,777 --> 00:16:33,550
There's a meteor
the size of North Carolina
heading straight for Earth.
253
00:16:33,616 --> 00:16:38,855
The impact is going to kill
every thing and everyone
on this planet.
254
00:16:38,921 --> 00:16:43,726
I built a bunker in the basement
of this casino strong enough
to withstand the blast.
255
00:16:43,793 --> 00:16:48,131
There's room for eight people.
I have chosen the seven of you,
plus me.
256
00:16:48,198 --> 00:16:52,569
When this is over,
it'll be up to us to repopulate
and re-civilize the planet.
257
00:17:01,511 --> 00:17:05,948
I couldn't resist!
I'm sorry.
258
00:17:08,151 --> 00:17:12,089
A joke. He made a joke.
259
00:17:12,155 --> 00:17:15,492
Do sit down, please.
Merrill, you and your
mother can sit over here.
260
00:17:15,558 --> 00:17:17,527
How do you know
she's my mother?
261
00:17:17,594 --> 00:17:20,197
Alas, there are
no secrets anymore.
262
00:17:20,263 --> 00:17:24,701
Actually, that's not quite true.
There is one secret,
one last secret.
263
00:17:24,767 --> 00:17:29,206
It involves all of you.
264
00:17:29,272 --> 00:17:34,077
- I'm getting goose pimples.
- Hey...
265
00:17:34,144 --> 00:17:36,913
Ah, Mr. Schaffer!
266
00:17:36,979 --> 00:17:40,717
Curiosity got
the better of you, eh?
Come and sit down.
267
00:17:40,783 --> 00:17:44,687
I'm fine. Thanks.
You haven't missed anything.
268
00:17:44,754 --> 00:17:47,357
We were just
cutting to the chase.
269
00:17:47,424 --> 00:17:51,594
Cutting to the chase.
270
00:17:53,029 --> 00:17:55,064
Well, you'll laugh later.
271
00:17:55,132 --> 00:17:58,935
Now, as you know,
the odds against winning
a jackpot downstairs...
272
00:17:59,001 --> 00:18:02,372
or hitting the state lottery
are astronomical...
millions to one.
273
00:18:02,439 --> 00:18:06,143
A serious person doesn't
even bother, but today...
274
00:18:06,209 --> 00:18:09,546
you have the chance
of playing a game...
275
00:18:09,612 --> 00:18:12,582
where the odds of winning
are one in six.
276
00:18:12,649 --> 00:18:15,552
One in six.
277
00:18:15,618 --> 00:18:18,155
It's one throw...
278
00:18:20,623 --> 00:18:22,692
of the dice.
279
00:18:26,663 --> 00:18:29,132
Ah! This is my attorney,
Mr. Grisham,
280
00:18:29,199 --> 00:18:32,435
who tragically was born
without a personality.
281
00:18:32,502 --> 00:18:37,006
Mr. Grisham is insisting
that anyone who wishes to
participate in our experiment...
282
00:18:37,073 --> 00:18:42,044
should sign this waiver,
absolving the casino from
any responsibility or damages,
283
00:18:42,111 --> 00:18:45,948
personal liability,
blah, blah, blah.
284
00:18:46,015 --> 00:18:49,419
So, who do you like,
Claude?
285
00:18:49,486 --> 00:18:52,389
The young woman
in the black coat.
She looks desperate.
286
00:18:52,455 --> 00:18:55,425
Yes, but she has
her mother with her.
287
00:18:55,492 --> 00:18:58,795
That could slow
her down, hmm?
Perhaps.
288
00:18:58,861 --> 00:19:02,265
Now, 563 miles from here...
289
00:19:02,332 --> 00:19:05,335
is a little town called
Silver City, New Mexico.
290
00:19:05,402 --> 00:19:07,637
Gold rush.
Quite right, Nick.
291
00:19:07,704 --> 00:19:10,039
Yes, they struck gold there
in 1860.
292
00:19:10,106 --> 00:19:12,842
It was the second largest
gold rush in American history.
293
00:19:12,909 --> 00:19:17,614
Very good, Nick. I think
Nick should be our captain.
294
00:19:19,015 --> 00:19:24,221
Uh, in downtown Silver City,
there's a train station.
295
00:19:24,287 --> 00:19:27,166
Can't miss it. As you go
in the front door, there's
some lockers on the right.
296
00:19:27,190 --> 00:19:29,426
Mr. Grisham,
do you have the keys?
297
00:19:29,492 --> 00:19:32,529
Six identical keys.
298
00:19:32,595 --> 00:19:35,798
They all open the same locker.
299
00:19:35,865 --> 00:19:38,735
That's locker 001.
300
00:19:38,801 --> 00:19:42,572
Inside the locker
is a red duffel bag.
Inside the red duffel bag...
301
00:19:42,639 --> 00:19:44,807
is $2 million.
302
00:19:44,874 --> 00:19:49,612
In cash, fifties and hundreds,
makes a pile about so big.
303
00:19:49,679 --> 00:19:52,949
First one there
keeps it all.
304
00:19:53,015 --> 00:19:54,384
Ooh!
305
00:19:54,451 --> 00:19:59,188
I put transmitting
devices in your key rings
so I can keep track of you.
306
00:19:59,256 --> 00:20:02,459
And, uh, that's it.
307
00:20:02,525 --> 00:20:04,394
Go.
308
00:20:07,129 --> 00:20:09,432
You just can't pick people
at random.
309
00:20:09,499 --> 00:20:11,868
I can do anything I like,
Owen. I'm eccentric.
310
00:20:11,934 --> 00:20:14,404
Go!
311
00:20:14,471 --> 00:20:17,240
Wait, wait.
So, it's like a race?
312
00:20:17,307 --> 00:20:20,677
A race. It's a race.
313
00:20:20,743 --> 00:20:22,845
I hope I win.
314
00:20:22,912 --> 00:20:25,248
Um, what are the rules?
315
00:20:25,315 --> 00:20:29,018
There's only one rule.
Are you ready? Here it is.
316
00:20:29,085 --> 00:20:33,022
There are no rules.
317
00:20:33,089 --> 00:20:34,991
Go.
318
00:20:36,893 --> 00:20:38,428
Go!
319
00:20:38,495 --> 00:20:42,732
So now when you say, "Go,"
you mean just go?
320
00:20:42,799 --> 00:20:46,436
Uh, begin, commence,
uh, start moving.
321
00:20:46,503 --> 00:20:50,340
Theoretically, you have been
racing for about 40 seconds.
322
00:20:50,407 --> 00:20:53,042
So far,
Mr. Schaffer is winning,
323
00:20:53,109 --> 00:20:55,878
because he's nearest
to the door.
324
00:21:03,152 --> 00:21:05,622
You're crazy!
325
00:21:05,688 --> 00:21:09,692
A r-race! A r-race!
You have to pace yourself.
326
00:21:09,759 --> 00:21:13,730
Carbohydrate is important.
Pasta is good.
327
00:21:13,796 --> 00:21:16,466
- Breathing...
- is important.
328
00:21:16,533 --> 00:21:21,471
Scusi. One...
329
00:21:21,538 --> 00:21:25,007
It's some sort of joke.
It has to be.
Yeah.
330
00:21:25,074 --> 00:21:28,478
What kind of jackass
just gives away $2 million?
331
00:21:28,545 --> 00:21:31,080
Maybe it's
a publicity stunt.
332
00:21:31,147 --> 00:21:34,617
What kind of publicity?
He swore us all to secrecy.
333
00:21:34,684 --> 00:21:39,356
Maybe it's a secret
publicity stunt.
A secret publicity stunt?
334
00:21:39,422 --> 00:21:40,890
Yes!
335
00:21:40,957 --> 00:21:43,101
I don't know what his angle is,
but there's always an angle.
336
00:21:43,125 --> 00:21:46,228
Donald Sinclair...
People like him make millions
of dollars every day...
337
00:21:46,295 --> 00:21:48,898
playing people
like us for chumps.
338
00:21:48,965 --> 00:21:51,334
I'm nobody's chump.
So you don't believe...
339
00:21:51,401 --> 00:21:55,171
11:30, nonstop to Chicago.
I'm gonna be on it.
340
00:21:55,237 --> 00:21:58,007
You know what?
He's right.
341
00:21:58,074 --> 00:22:00,743
I'm not cuttin' short
my first family vacation...
342
00:22:00,810 --> 00:22:03,279
in three years to
go on some half-assed
wild goose chase.
343
00:22:03,346 --> 00:22:07,083
Okay, so,
you're not goin' for it?
344
00:22:07,149 --> 00:22:09,118
No.
No.
345
00:22:09,185 --> 00:22:10,920
I don't think so.
346
00:22:10,987 --> 00:22:13,523
Not me, no.
No. Great.
347
00:22:13,590 --> 00:22:15,992
I guess that's
that, huh?
Right.
348
00:22:16,058 --> 00:22:18,795
It was nice meetin' y'all.
I'm gonna take the stairs.
349
00:22:18,861 --> 00:22:21,464
My room's just two floors down,
so nice meetin' ya.
350
00:22:21,531 --> 00:22:24,066
Hey, have a nice vacation.
351
00:22:31,574 --> 00:22:33,610
You know,
it's probably stuck.
352
00:22:33,676 --> 00:22:37,714
I think I'm gonna
take the stairs too.
353
00:22:43,720 --> 00:22:47,223
* Who let the dogs out
Woof, woof, woof, woof *
Crap.
354
00:22:47,289 --> 00:22:50,226
* Who let the dogs out
Woof, woof, woof, woof *
355
00:22:50,292 --> 00:22:53,596
- Go, go, go, go!
- Come on, Vera!
- Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
356
00:22:55,131 --> 00:22:57,467
* The party was nice
The party was jumpin' *
357
00:22:57,534 --> 00:23:00,169
Watch out!
* Yippie, yi, yo *
358
00:23:00,236 --> 00:23:03,506
Comin' through!
359
00:23:07,677 --> 00:23:10,046
Hold the door, please.
360
00:23:10,112 --> 00:23:12,749
Take your time.
No rush.
361
00:23:12,815 --> 00:23:14,984
Get up!
Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait!
362
00:23:15,051 --> 00:23:19,589
This is crazy. If we're all
gonna go for it, why don't
we go for it together?
363
00:23:19,656 --> 00:23:22,825
You know,
split the money 50-50.
364
00:23:22,892 --> 00:23:26,563
Fifty-fifty?
You know what I mean.
Whatever, whatever.
365
00:23:26,629 --> 00:23:28,565
Yes, yes, that's a good plan.
366
00:23:28,631 --> 00:23:31,701
It's a race.
It's a r-race.
367
00:23:31,768 --> 00:23:35,004
I'm winning. I'm winning.
368
00:23:38,207 --> 00:23:40,076
And they're off!
369
00:23:40,142 --> 00:23:42,011
No one...
370
00:23:42,078 --> 00:23:46,215
No one is offering you
action like this.
371
00:23:46,282 --> 00:23:49,519
A horse race with animals
that can think and plan...
372
00:23:49,586 --> 00:23:53,923
and lie and cheat
and play dirty.
373
00:23:53,990 --> 00:23:57,760
Hmph. It's the gambling
experience of a lifetime.
374
00:23:57,827 --> 00:24:02,064
It's my way of saying
I understand men like you.
375
00:24:02,131 --> 00:24:05,001
I know what you want.
I know what you need.
376
00:24:05,067 --> 00:24:08,971
This casino... my casino...
Is where you belong.
377
00:24:11,307 --> 00:24:13,676
I got it!
Excuse me!
378
00:24:13,743 --> 00:24:16,112
To the airport.
You got it.
379
00:24:16,178 --> 00:24:18,781
We're out the door.
I don't see you.
Where are you?
380
00:24:18,848 --> 00:24:23,385
I forgot to tip the maid.
I always tip the maid.
Forget the maid. There he is!
381
00:24:23,452 --> 00:24:25,755
Come on!
Let's go!
Okay, okay.
382
00:24:25,822 --> 00:24:31,127
Bev, this is a real job!
I swear!
383
00:24:31,193 --> 00:24:33,896
What is it?
384
00:24:33,963 --> 00:24:36,065
Huh?
385
00:24:36,132 --> 00:24:38,034
The job?
What's the job?
386
00:24:40,302 --> 00:24:42,672
Ink... for fountain pens.
387
00:24:45,074 --> 00:24:48,010
- And they're in New Mexico?
- Silver City, New Mexico.
388
00:24:48,077 --> 00:24:51,948
I love New Mexico.
Honey, we'll go with you.
389
00:24:52,014 --> 00:24:54,651
No!
Why not?
390
00:24:54,717 --> 00:24:59,722
Because... we've already
paid for the room. Ah!
Now look who's wasting money.
391
00:24:59,789 --> 00:25:02,692
No, no, no. No.
This was your idea to stop here.
392
00:25:02,759 --> 00:25:05,838
I don't care about David
Copperfield. This is our family
vacation. We'll go with you.
393
00:25:05,862 --> 00:25:09,231
But you don't understand...
We will go with you!
394
00:25:10,466 --> 00:25:13,670
Fine.
Yes!
395
00:25:13,736 --> 00:25:16,739
Fine. Fine. Here.
Call the bellman.
Have him bring the van around.
396
00:25:16,806 --> 00:25:18,975
You happy? You happy?
Okay.
397
00:25:19,041 --> 00:25:23,479
Scusi. Scusi.
I'm in a race.
Scusi. Oh!
398
00:25:23,546 --> 00:25:26,248
Scusi. It's a race.
399
00:25:40,563 --> 00:25:44,066
What is he doing?
I think he's sleeping.
400
00:25:44,133 --> 00:25:48,070
Sleeping?
He must be narcoleptic.
It's a rare sleeping disorder.
401
00:25:48,137 --> 00:25:51,608
But I bet on him!
So did I.
Two million dollars.
402
00:25:51,674 --> 00:25:54,010
I'm sorry, gentlemen.
All the bets are locked in.
403
00:25:54,076 --> 00:25:56,112
Sleeping! Sleeping!
404
00:26:04,220 --> 00:26:06,789
Look out!
Don't tell me how to drive!
405
00:26:06,856 --> 00:26:10,392
It's only yellow.
It's only yellow. Run it!
406
00:26:10,459 --> 00:26:14,063
Where's my video game?
Seat belts, everyone.
407
00:26:14,130 --> 00:26:18,735
-Honey, what is the rush?
-I don't wanna be late. This is
the opportunity of a lifetime.
408
00:26:18,801 --> 00:26:21,370
You're not just a travel agent,
Roger. You're an angel.
409
00:26:21,437 --> 00:26:24,206
There's one charter plane
available in Las Vegas.
410
00:26:24,273 --> 00:26:26,142
We just bagged it.
Ooh.
411
00:26:26,208 --> 00:26:28,144
Back to pass.
Get rid of it.
412
00:26:28,210 --> 00:26:31,781
Looks to his left.
Get rid of it.
Throw the ball!
413
00:26:31,848 --> 00:26:34,283
That's why you're not
gonna get drafted!
414
00:26:34,350 --> 00:26:37,486
You'll be lucky to play
arena football in Barcelona!
415
00:26:37,553 --> 00:26:40,322
- You like football?
- Sure.
416
00:26:40,389 --> 00:26:44,493
Did you happen to catch that,
uh, Dallas game last week?
417
00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:49,699
You can't really call it
a game. It was an obscenity.
It was a crime against football.
418
00:26:49,766 --> 00:26:52,368
I lost 20 grand on that game!
And they would have won!
419
00:26:52,434 --> 00:26:56,005
Now I gotta work two shifts
because of that idiot!
420
00:26:56,072 --> 00:27:00,176
Stevie Wonder could have
done a better job
calling that game.
421
00:27:00,242 --> 00:27:04,346
Where the hell's
the airport?
422
00:27:06,382 --> 00:27:09,919
One lousy flip of the coin
and the whole franchise goes
straight down the crapper.
423
00:27:09,986 --> 00:27:12,188
That'll be 10.50, buddy.
Keep the change.
424
00:27:12,254 --> 00:27:16,759
Hey, hey, hey!
Thanks a lot. You have
a nice flight. Yeah! Whoo!
425
00:27:16,826 --> 00:27:19,028
You know who that was?
Nah.
426
00:27:19,095 --> 00:27:23,065
That was the ref.
The guy from the game?
The coin toss!
427
00:27:23,132 --> 00:27:26,068
Oh, my God!
You're right!
That was him!
428
00:27:26,135 --> 00:27:28,337
I had him in the cab,
and I let him go!
429
00:27:28,404 --> 00:27:31,373
Where are we going?
We gotta go.
Come on. Just go.
430
00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:34,677
Go, go, go, go, go.
Chumps.
431
00:27:48,157 --> 00:27:50,492
**
432
00:27:59,869 --> 00:28:02,138
Excuse me. Hi.
433
00:28:02,204 --> 00:28:06,308
I'm not a creep
or anything.
I don't have any quarters.
434
00:28:06,375 --> 00:28:11,848
Oh, no, um, no.
I never do this, but I'm
reading the same book you are.
435
00:28:11,914 --> 00:28:14,050
Look. See? Lindbergh.
Hmm.
436
00:28:14,116 --> 00:28:16,118
It's fantastic, isn't it?
Mm-hmm.
437
00:28:16,185 --> 00:28:19,956
What part are you on?
He just had a sex change.
438
00:28:20,022 --> 00:28:22,124
Who did? Lindbergh?
Mm-hmm.
439
00:28:22,191 --> 00:28:24,761
- Sex change?
- Ooh, yeah. Ooh.
440
00:28:28,330 --> 00:28:30,032
That's funny.
441
00:28:30,099 --> 00:28:31,968
I thought so.
That's funny.
442
00:28:32,034 --> 00:28:33,970
I wouldn't be too proud
of yourself though.
443
00:28:34,036 --> 00:28:36,038
I'm the most gullible
guy in Chicago.
444
00:28:36,105 --> 00:28:38,474
Uh-huh.
445
00:28:38,540 --> 00:28:40,977
Can I buy you a drink?
446
00:28:41,043 --> 00:28:43,612
I can't. I'm flying.
447
00:28:43,679 --> 00:28:48,717
- So, it'll relax you.
- No, I mean, I'm flying.
I'm a pilot.
448
00:28:48,785 --> 00:28:52,121
Oh. Ah.
449
00:28:52,188 --> 00:28:54,957
Pilot? Are there
a lot of female pilots?
450
00:28:55,024 --> 00:28:57,794
There's at least one.
451
00:29:00,863 --> 00:29:04,366
As soon as I walk away,
I'm gonna think of something
great to say to that.
452
00:29:04,433 --> 00:29:07,036
Good. Mail it to me.
453
00:29:12,141 --> 00:29:14,410
Flight 115 to
Albuquerque, New Mexico.
454
00:29:14,476 --> 00:29:17,513
Gate 17.
You better hurry.
Four tickets to Albuquerque.
455
00:29:17,579 --> 00:29:20,449
Please. Near the front
of the plane. Please.
All right.
456
00:29:20,516 --> 00:29:22,451
Come on!
457
00:29:22,518 --> 00:29:26,555
This is so exciting.
I've never been on
a private plane before.
458
00:29:26,622 --> 00:29:28,524
This is bigger than my condo.
459
00:29:28,590 --> 00:29:31,393
Gentlemen,
what's our E.T.A.?
One hour and ten minutes.
460
00:29:31,460 --> 00:29:34,630
If you can do it
in less than an hour,
I'll buy you both dinner.
461
00:29:34,696 --> 00:29:36,365
You're on...
462
00:29:36,432 --> 00:29:39,535
Watch it. Move.
Excuse me. Move.
Move! Move! Move!
463
00:29:39,601 --> 00:29:41,503
- Who was next?
- I was!
464
00:29:41,570 --> 00:29:43,439
I was!
I was!
465
00:29:43,505 --> 00:29:45,607
What? You were not next!
Are you callin' me a liar?
466
00:29:45,674 --> 00:29:49,311
Yeah, as a matter of fact,
I am. We've been in line
over 20 minutes.
467
00:29:49,378 --> 00:29:52,748
Is that the correct time?
Hey! Whoa!
468
00:29:52,815 --> 00:29:55,117
Yes, it is.
469
00:29:55,184 --> 00:29:58,454
- Who's next?
- They were, right there.
470
00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:01,257
Two tickets to Albuquerque.-
471
00:30:01,323 --> 00:30:05,661
I'm sorry. Ouch.
We're completely booked.
There's nothing.
472
00:30:05,727 --> 00:30:08,530
Oh, there's a 4:30, but
you have to switch in Dallas.
473
00:30:13,302 --> 00:30:18,074
What do you mean that's it?
I'm not givin' up
and neither are you.
474
00:30:18,140 --> 00:30:21,710
And neither am I!
I'll tell you something,
brother.
475
00:30:21,777 --> 00:30:27,049
If we're not flyin' outta here,
no one is flyin' outta here.
476
00:31:17,299 --> 00:31:20,469
Whoo!
Okay!
477
00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:27,176
Well, that can't be good.
478
00:31:34,550 --> 00:31:37,186
Duane!
479
00:31:39,821 --> 00:31:41,958
Ooh!
480
00:31:45,294 --> 00:31:47,129
Whoa!
481
00:31:49,165 --> 00:31:52,268
No!
482
00:31:59,075 --> 00:32:01,610
Blaine! Blaine!
483
00:32:04,813 --> 00:32:08,517
Oh! Oh, no.
Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!
484
00:32:08,584 --> 00:32:10,819
Blaine!
485
00:32:13,855 --> 00:32:16,392
Shit!
486
00:32:27,203 --> 00:32:30,572
I can't!
487
00:32:30,639 --> 00:32:34,876
What are you doin'?
I don't know where to go!
488
00:32:34,943 --> 00:32:36,912
Move! Aah!
Trying to kill me?
489
00:32:36,979 --> 00:32:41,217
Duane, stop the car!
Stop the car!
490
00:32:41,283 --> 00:32:44,920
Oh, no!
Hey! Hey! Oh!
491
00:32:44,987 --> 00:32:50,226
Blaine! Blaine!
492
00:32:52,261 --> 00:32:56,398
Whoa, girl! Jesus!
493
00:33:09,678 --> 00:33:13,082
Freeze everything, every flight.
Get me Central Operations.
494
00:33:15,417 --> 00:33:17,386
Attention all passengers.
495
00:33:17,453 --> 00:33:19,988
Due to a technical problem
with our radar tracking system,
496
00:33:20,056 --> 00:33:22,358
all flights are postponed
until further notice.
497
00:33:22,424 --> 00:33:25,727
We apologize for
any inconvenience.
498
00:33:25,794 --> 00:33:28,130
Come on. We gotta go.
499
00:33:28,197 --> 00:33:29,665
Hurry up!
The bags?
500
00:33:29,731 --> 00:33:31,467
Forget the bags!
Let's go!
501
00:33:31,533 --> 00:33:34,970
Comin' through!
502
00:33:35,037 --> 00:33:38,274
This is your license?
Yes, it is.
503
00:33:39,275 --> 00:33:41,210
Where was it issued?
In Guam.
504
00:33:43,612 --> 00:33:47,883
Just head east,
and I'm in a hurry.
505
00:33:47,949 --> 00:33:53,189
Hello again. East it is.
506
00:33:54,556 --> 00:33:57,659
We have a, uh,
midsized Caprice.
507
00:33:57,726 --> 00:34:00,429
What color is it?
We don't care about color.
508
00:34:00,496 --> 00:34:03,065
Just give us whatever car
is parked closest to the door.
509
00:34:03,132 --> 00:34:05,701
Ask about insurance.
510
00:34:05,767 --> 00:34:09,171
Would you be
interested in purchasing
liability insurance?
511
00:34:09,238 --> 00:34:11,740
How much is it?
It doesn't matter.
We'll take it.
512
00:34:11,807 --> 00:34:13,742
Just hurry.
513
00:34:13,809 --> 00:34:18,214
Hit enter.
514
00:34:18,280 --> 00:34:20,282
Now shift.
515
00:34:20,349 --> 00:34:23,719
Shift key.
Right there. Yeah.
516
00:34:23,785 --> 00:34:26,822
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
517
00:34:26,888 --> 00:34:28,857
Hey, watch it!
518
00:34:28,924 --> 00:34:33,028
Bus!
White people!
519
00:34:33,095 --> 00:34:35,797
Idiot!
520
00:34:36,965 --> 00:34:39,168
Okay, I've got one.
521
00:34:40,169 --> 00:34:42,571
What?
A great comeback.
522
00:34:42,638 --> 00:34:44,606
Oh, okay.
Okay.
523
00:34:44,673 --> 00:34:46,908
I said, "Are there
a lot of female pilots?"
524
00:34:46,975 --> 00:34:48,810
And you said,
"There's at least one."
525
00:34:48,877 --> 00:34:52,381
I should have said,
"Two if you count Lindbergh."
526
00:34:52,448 --> 00:34:55,451
'Cause you said
he had a sex change.
527
00:34:55,517 --> 00:34:58,154
It's a work in progress.
Okay.
528
00:34:58,220 --> 00:35:00,489
I'm Nick Schaffer.
Tracy Faucet.
529
00:35:00,556 --> 00:35:02,658
So I guess you can have
that drink now.
530
00:35:02,724 --> 00:35:06,162
No, I told you I'm flying.
I'm leaving for Roswell
in five minutes.
531
00:35:06,228 --> 00:35:08,564
Didn't you hear?
Everybody's grounded.
532
00:35:08,630 --> 00:35:12,668
That's only for fixed wing.
I'm in a chopper.
We use a different system.
533
00:35:12,734 --> 00:35:14,636
Oh.
534
00:35:18,974 --> 00:35:22,844
Roswell, New Mexico?
Uh-huh.
535
00:35:22,911 --> 00:35:26,215
- You're flying to New Mexico?
- Yeah, we've been
flying down all week.
536
00:35:26,282 --> 00:35:28,250
They're repainting
the whole fleet.
537
00:35:32,254 --> 00:35:36,625
You can fly.
Nobody else can fly.
538
00:35:36,692 --> 00:35:39,695
But you can fly.
539
00:35:39,761 --> 00:35:42,898
And you're flying
to New Mexico.
Yeah.
540
00:35:42,964 --> 00:35:45,967
But nobody else can fly.
Yeah.
541
00:35:46,034 --> 00:35:49,338
Do you need a ride?
542
00:35:52,841 --> 00:35:55,344
Come on!
543
00:36:00,649 --> 00:36:03,585
Coconut.
Coconut!
Who had coconut?
544
00:36:03,652 --> 00:36:06,488
I did.
545
00:36:06,555 --> 00:36:08,257
Ah, Phil.
546
00:36:09,758 --> 00:36:11,960
That's the kind of car
that I'm gettin'.
547
00:36:12,027 --> 00:36:14,696
Yeah? Don't count on it.
Why not?
548
00:36:14,763 --> 00:36:17,733
Because the Volkswagen
Beetle was used
by the Nazis.
549
00:36:17,799 --> 00:36:21,203
I would not be comfortable
driving around in one.
550
00:36:21,270 --> 00:36:25,574
So, don't drive it.
I will.
Dad, I have to go.
551
00:36:25,641 --> 00:36:29,110
- No, you don't.
- Yes, I do. I really do.
552
00:36:29,177 --> 00:36:33,582
- We just stopped!
- I couldn't go.
The bathroom was too gross.
553
00:36:33,649 --> 00:36:37,686
Well, can't you hold it in?
I can't!
It's an emergency.
554
00:36:37,753 --> 00:36:39,821
Honey, there's
a restaurant.
555
00:36:39,888 --> 00:36:42,767
That's three miles off the road,
and then three miles back.
We lose ten minutes.
556
00:36:42,791 --> 00:36:45,093
So what?
Your daughter has to go
to the bathroom.
557
00:36:45,160 --> 00:36:47,529
Please stop, Dad.
All right.
558
00:36:47,596 --> 00:36:50,232
Jason, look back there
for an empty jar.
559
00:36:50,299 --> 00:36:52,301
A jar?
Girls don't pee in jars.
560
00:36:52,368 --> 00:36:54,403
Oh, all right, sorry.
561
00:36:54,470 --> 00:36:58,173
Jason, we're gonna
need a jar and a funnel.
562
00:36:58,240 --> 00:37:00,742
Dad, I don't have to pee.
It's number two!
563
00:37:00,809 --> 00:37:05,247
- Sorry, I can't stop.
- Dad, I'm prairie-dogging it.
564
00:37:05,314 --> 00:37:06,782
What does that mean?
565
00:37:06,848 --> 00:37:10,619
Like when a prairie dog
sticks his head in and out
of the ground.
566
00:37:10,686 --> 00:37:13,622
Hmm. Oh!
567
00:37:13,689 --> 00:37:15,156
Oh!
Oh!
568
00:37:15,223 --> 00:37:17,626
I do not want
to picture that.
569
00:37:17,693 --> 00:37:21,397
Yes, sir,
Silver City it is.
570
00:37:21,463 --> 00:37:24,800
Buddy.
It's about 700 miles.
571
00:37:24,866 --> 00:37:29,271
You don't mind, do ya?
Oh, no. No, no,
I don't mind.
572
00:37:29,338 --> 00:37:32,674
A job's just
another job for me.
573
00:37:32,741 --> 00:37:35,711
About how much you think
that's gonna cost?
574
00:37:35,777 --> 00:37:40,582
I wouldn't worry about it.
Tell you what.
575
00:37:40,649 --> 00:37:44,786
You just pay me
whatever you think is fair,
576
00:37:44,853 --> 00:37:49,858
'cause I trust
your judgment.
Hmph.
577
00:37:49,925 --> 00:37:52,894
I hate you. I hate you!
578
00:37:52,961 --> 00:37:57,165
Nobody look. I'm gonna
turn on the radio, honey,
so nobody can hear you.
579
00:37:57,232 --> 00:37:59,110
** I'll never forgive you.
I hate you.
580
00:37:59,134 --> 00:38:01,803
Nobody can hear you, honey.
Push away.
581
00:38:07,509 --> 00:38:10,379
Whoo-hoo!
582
00:38:10,446 --> 00:38:13,625
I'm gonna drop you off right
there. There's a parking lot
right near the hospital.
583
00:38:13,649 --> 00:38:17,085
Great. Great.
So what's wrong with her?
584
00:38:17,152 --> 00:38:20,055
- Who?
- Your sister.
You said it was serious.
585
00:38:21,423 --> 00:38:24,993
Oh, uh, yeah.
Shark bite.
586
00:38:26,161 --> 00:38:28,830
- A shark bite?
- Yeah.
587
00:38:28,897 --> 00:38:31,633
They took her
to Silver City?
588
00:38:31,700 --> 00:38:34,970
They have a really good
shark attack unit there.
589
00:38:41,977 --> 00:38:44,880
How fast was I going?
590
00:38:52,621 --> 00:38:56,625
Where are we?
Oh, it's a shortcut
I know.
591
00:38:56,692 --> 00:39:00,529
Well, maybe we should
stick to the highway.
There's a thought.
592
00:39:00,596 --> 00:39:04,900
You say we should stick
to the highway. I say
we should take my shortcut.
593
00:39:04,966 --> 00:39:09,705
Why don't we
just flip a coin?
It's not what you think.
594
00:39:09,771 --> 00:39:13,108
Come on, you blind
son of a bitch!
Wait! Stop it!
595
00:39:13,174 --> 00:39:16,778
Where's that whistle?
Give me that goddamn whistle!
I'm gonna shove it up your ass!
596
00:39:16,845 --> 00:39:19,214
Come back here!
Arrivederci.
597
00:39:19,280 --> 00:39:22,317
Ooh, ah, ooh, ooh,
ah, ooh, ooh, ah!
598
00:39:22,384 --> 00:39:25,220
Ooh! Oh, shit. Ooh!
Ah, ooh.
599
00:39:25,286 --> 00:39:29,825
I'll kill him. Ah!
600
00:39:29,891 --> 00:39:34,229
Ooh, ah, ooh, ow, ow,
ooh, aah, ooh!
601
00:39:34,295 --> 00:39:36,965
Ah, ooh, ah, ah!
Oh, a-ha-ha!
602
00:39:47,308 --> 00:39:51,847
- Squirrel?
- No, thank you. We're
looking for the interstate.
603
00:39:51,913 --> 00:39:55,451
I get that a lot
'cause of the detour.
604
00:39:55,517 --> 00:39:59,455
Oh, now they've
lost their way.
605
00:39:59,521 --> 00:40:03,692
Now they can't go home.
You sure you don't want one?
606
00:40:03,759 --> 00:40:05,461
We're sure. Thank you.
607
00:40:05,527 --> 00:40:09,297
They make crackerjack pets.
I taught this one
to shake hands.
608
00:40:09,364 --> 00:40:13,401
He's not for sale though.
Who wants to go home
with the nice ladies, huh?
609
00:40:13,469 --> 00:40:16,838
"Oh, pick me. Pick me.
Oh, don't be afraid.
I don't bite.
610
00:40:16,905 --> 00:40:21,342
- What's your name,
pretty lady?"
- Vera.
611
00:40:21,409 --> 00:40:23,812
Ma'am, uh, really.
We're not interested.
612
00:40:23,879 --> 00:40:26,982
Well, I'm not talkin'
to you, am I?
I'm talkin' to Vera.
613
00:40:27,048 --> 00:40:31,453
What about Bucky here?
He just loves to climb
the trees and eat the nuts.
614
00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:33,655
Ma'am, we do not
want a squirrel.
615
00:40:33,722 --> 00:40:35,857
Do you or do you not know
where the interstate is?
616
00:40:35,924 --> 00:40:39,260
Of course I do.
I'm not retarded.
"Tell 'em about the shortcut."
617
00:40:39,327 --> 00:40:41,697
Oh, thank you, Bucky.
618
00:40:41,763 --> 00:40:45,166
I almost forgot.
There's a dandy shortcut.
619
00:40:45,233 --> 00:40:47,869
It'll bring you
right to exit 14.
It'll save you 30 miles.
620
00:40:47,936 --> 00:40:51,072
- Oh!
- Now listen carefully.
621
00:40:51,139 --> 00:40:54,710
You want to go straight
down here exactly 1.8 miles.
622
00:40:54,776 --> 00:40:58,980
- 1.8.
- And you make a left
at the Totem Pole Ranch.
623
00:40:59,047 --> 00:41:01,883
Go 5.4 miles and
you're gonna go up a big hill.
624
00:41:01,950 --> 00:41:05,521
You'll see a big yellow sign
with some graffiti on it.
625
00:41:05,587 --> 00:41:10,191
There's a little dirt road.
Take that on the right. It'll
take you to the interstate.
626
00:41:10,258 --> 00:41:11,560
Thank you.
Thank you.
627
00:41:11,627 --> 00:41:15,897
Oh, wait a minute.
Take some nuts with you...
628
00:41:15,964 --> 00:41:18,767
just in case
you see a squirrel, okay?
629
00:41:18,834 --> 00:41:20,001
Okay.
630
00:41:20,068 --> 00:41:24,640
"Bye. Bye. Oh,
you could have bought me."
631
00:41:24,706 --> 00:41:27,342
You'll make it.
You'll make it.
632
00:41:27,408 --> 00:41:29,477
Ah. Ah.
633
00:41:32,914 --> 00:41:35,717
Where am I?
634
00:41:39,320 --> 00:41:42,323
Wow! A Barbie Museum!
Can we stop?
635
00:41:42,390 --> 00:41:46,828
Sorry, Kimmy.
We have a plan, and we're
gonna stick to the plan.
636
00:41:46,895 --> 00:41:49,297
Please, Daddy.
Please, please,
please, please, please.
637
00:41:49,364 --> 00:41:51,733
Hey, hey!
It's not fair.
638
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:54,369
We never get to stop
anywhere I want to.
639
00:41:54,435 --> 00:41:57,839
I'm sure Jason doesn't want
to go to the Barbie Museum.
640
00:41:57,906 --> 00:42:01,276
Are you kiddin'?
I'll stop anywhere.
I'm wigging out back here.
641
00:42:01,342 --> 00:42:04,880
Yeah, okay, honey.
You need to pull over and stop
to give the kids a break.
642
00:42:04,946 --> 00:42:06,882
Yeah, okay,
maybe on the way back.
643
00:42:06,948 --> 00:42:08,984
- Stop the car.
- I can't do that.
644
00:42:09,050 --> 00:42:11,019
- We all need to stop the car.
- No can do.
645
00:42:11,086 --> 00:42:13,488
- You need to stop the car.
- No!
646
00:42:13,555 --> 00:42:17,258
Stop the car!
647
00:42:19,828 --> 00:42:24,332
Okay, fine, but 10 minutes.
648
00:42:24,399 --> 00:42:27,636
Wow! The Barbie Museum.
649
00:42:27,703 --> 00:42:30,038
Klaus Barbie,
650
00:42:30,105 --> 00:42:32,440
sometimes known as
the Butcher of Lyons.
651
00:42:32,507 --> 00:42:36,645
Let the Jew revisionists
talk about their
death camps...
652
00:42:36,712 --> 00:42:39,581
and so-called crimes
against humanity.
653
00:42:39,648 --> 00:42:45,120
This museum is lovingly
dedicated to the Klaus
Barbie that nobody knows.
654
00:42:45,186 --> 00:42:48,924
The husband,
the devoted father,
the wine connoisseur...
655
00:42:48,990 --> 00:42:51,960
and three-time
ballroom dancing champion.
656
00:42:58,099 --> 00:43:01,870
Hey, hey, there's that guy,
the "udgy" one.
657
00:43:04,005 --> 00:43:07,508
Barbie joined
the S.S. in 1935...
658
00:43:07,575 --> 00:43:11,479
where he soon became
one of the Fuhrer's
favorite young officers.
659
00:43:11,546 --> 00:43:13,982
Uh, can we go?
Shh.
660
00:43:14,049 --> 00:43:17,285
Here we see him standing
beside Hitler's touring car,
661
00:43:17,352 --> 00:43:21,456
the very same car which
can be seen on display
outside in our courtyard.
662
00:43:21,522 --> 00:43:24,325
You're leaving?
663
00:43:24,392 --> 00:43:26,427
What...
664
00:43:26,494 --> 00:43:31,132
No... Yes. Well,
we have a 4:30 book burning,
and then we have a...
665
00:43:31,199 --> 00:43:33,301
A christening.
Yes, a christening...
666
00:43:33,368 --> 00:43:37,438
for one of our many white,
Christian, non-Jewish friends...
667
00:43:37,505 --> 00:43:43,144
Family. Blood relatives.
Yes, the Himmler Hessin
Von Sturichberg...
668
00:43:43,211 --> 00:43:45,814
Okay. Thank you so much.
Yes, love your do.
669
00:43:45,881 --> 00:43:47,783
Thank you.
It's beautiful.
We had a great time.
670
00:43:47,849 --> 00:43:50,919
Wow! Oh, a gift shop.
671
00:43:50,986 --> 00:43:54,255
Yes, I know, honey.
Next time. I promise.
I really do.
672
00:43:54,322 --> 00:43:56,291
Just go. Just go.
673
00:43:56,357 --> 00:44:00,996
What is... Oh, my God!
We've been cut!
What do we do now?
674
00:44:01,062 --> 00:44:03,665
I say we take
the interstate.
675
00:44:03,732 --> 00:44:07,302
No, "ake" Highway "well."
That's a shortcut.
676
00:44:07,368 --> 00:44:11,039
You don't know what the shortcut
is. It could be anything.
It could be a dirt road.
677
00:44:11,106 --> 00:44:14,876
You know what?
There are "oo" of us.
Why don't we just separate?
678
00:44:14,943 --> 00:44:17,946
What?
There's "oo" of us.
679
00:44:18,013 --> 00:44:21,549
"Amy" we should
"ust" separate.
680
00:44:21,616 --> 00:44:24,352
You're right.
You're a genius.
681
00:44:24,419 --> 00:44:28,223
There's two of us. If we
separate and you steal a car,
we can both go our own way...
682
00:44:28,289 --> 00:44:30,358
and double our chances
of gettin' there first.
683
00:44:30,425 --> 00:44:32,861
All right.
You take the...
684
00:44:32,928 --> 00:44:35,263
We only got one "ee."
685
00:44:37,833 --> 00:44:41,903
Oh, look, there it is.
Totem Pole Ranch, turn left.
686
00:44:41,970 --> 00:44:46,307
1.8 miles exactly.
All right, squirrel lady.
687
00:44:50,345 --> 00:44:55,050
I can't believe it, Dad.
You just stole Adolf Hitler's
Mercedes-Benz.
688
00:44:55,116 --> 00:44:59,420
Hitler had it comin'.
What goes around
comes around.
689
00:44:59,487 --> 00:45:01,422
They're gonna
be pissed.
690
00:45:01,489 --> 00:45:05,961
They're always pissed, honey.
They're Nazis.
It's like it's their job.
691
00:45:06,027 --> 00:45:11,399
Hey, honey, when we get
to Silver City, we'll call 'em.
We'll work somethin' out.
692
00:45:11,466 --> 00:45:13,735
Yee-hoo!
693
00:45:16,838 --> 00:45:18,306
North?
694
00:45:18,373 --> 00:45:20,909
A little detour.
It'll just take a minute.
695
00:45:20,976 --> 00:45:23,444
I just wanted to say hi
to my boyfriend.
696
00:45:23,511 --> 00:45:25,413
Oh.
697
00:45:31,820 --> 00:45:35,423
I can't believe it.
That... That son of a bitch!
698
00:45:35,490 --> 00:45:37,425
That's Charlene's car.
699
00:45:37,492 --> 00:45:41,029
- Charlene?
- His ex-girlfriend,
or so I thought.
700
00:45:41,096 --> 00:45:45,300
Come on now.
I'm sure there's a
perfectly innocent explanation.
701
00:45:45,366 --> 00:45:48,403
She probably came by
just to pick up
some clothes or... Oh!
702
00:45:48,469 --> 00:45:51,472
Nice and warm.
703
00:45:51,539 --> 00:45:53,809
Okay.
704
00:45:56,644 --> 00:45:59,047
What the... No!
705
00:45:59,114 --> 00:46:01,482
Get down!
706
00:46:03,318 --> 00:46:07,055
Did I come at
a bad time, asshole?
707
00:46:08,756 --> 00:46:13,061
I'll ram this helicopter
right down your throat!
708
00:46:14,395 --> 00:46:16,731
- Ahh!
- No! Whoa!
709
00:46:16,798 --> 00:46:19,400
Hey! Whoa!
What are you doing?
710
00:46:19,467 --> 00:46:24,105
Don't worry about me.
My father's a navy pilot.
I've been flying since I was 15.
711
00:46:24,172 --> 00:46:27,142
I'm not worried about you.
I'm worried about me.
712
00:46:27,208 --> 00:46:31,779
Shawn, you have a minute?
I want to talk about
our relationship.
713
00:46:45,861 --> 00:46:48,529
Suck on that, creep!
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
714
00:46:48,596 --> 00:46:50,131
- Oh!
- Ah!
715
00:46:50,198 --> 00:46:53,168
- That's...
- Not the truck!
716
00:46:53,234 --> 00:46:56,137
Oh, my God!
717
00:46:56,204 --> 00:46:58,506
Come on. Help me.
Open it.
718
00:46:58,573 --> 00:47:00,308
I'm not comfortable...
719
00:47:00,375 --> 00:47:02,243
Open it!
Okay.
720
00:47:07,782 --> 00:47:10,151
She's gonna kill me.
721
00:47:10,218 --> 00:47:12,888
We should get outta here.
Not yet!
722
00:47:12,954 --> 00:47:17,492
You two-timing,
backstabbing snake!
723
00:47:17,558 --> 00:47:19,560
You worm! You turd!
724
00:47:22,563 --> 00:47:28,269
My God!
What was I thinking?
I want my five months back!
725
00:47:29,770 --> 00:47:32,340
I'm getting
the tattoo removed!
726
00:47:32,407 --> 00:47:34,509
No!
727
00:47:34,575 --> 00:47:36,211
Hey!
Oh!
728
00:47:36,277 --> 00:47:38,279
Stop hitting me!
729
00:47:38,346 --> 00:47:41,749
Where are you goin', baby?
Wait for me!
No!
730
00:47:49,224 --> 00:47:54,329
No! Oh! Whoa!
731
00:47:54,395 --> 00:47:57,632
No!
732
00:48:00,969 --> 00:48:05,740
- I think we just killed him.
- You can't kill him!
He's like a cockroach.
733
00:48:07,742 --> 00:48:11,379
- Uh-oh.
- No, no, no, no-oh!
734
00:48:11,446 --> 00:48:13,248
No, fix the... Oh!
735
00:48:13,314 --> 00:48:17,352
No!
736
00:48:17,418 --> 00:48:20,855
Should we be this low?
737
00:48:24,759 --> 00:48:28,063
Come on. Come on.
Let's keep goin'. Come on.
738
00:48:29,797 --> 00:48:35,070
We just violated
about 115 federal laws.
739
00:48:35,136 --> 00:48:37,805
"We"?
I'm getting out of here.
Are you coming?
740
00:48:37,872 --> 00:48:41,542
No. No, no.
I know things look bad...
741
00:48:43,744 --> 00:48:45,613
Nice meeting you.
742
00:48:48,916 --> 00:48:51,019
Get out of the truck, Shawn.
743
00:48:51,086 --> 00:48:54,422
That's it, Tracy.
You and I are through.
744
00:48:56,958 --> 00:48:59,560
Tracy! Wait!
745
00:49:01,096 --> 00:49:05,033
* Ooh, sugar pie honey bunch *
Tracy!
746
00:49:05,100 --> 00:49:07,002
* You know that I love you *
747
00:49:07,068 --> 00:49:10,805
Wait. This is the first
illegal thing I've done
in my adult life.
748
00:49:10,871 --> 00:49:12,740
How does it feel?
749
00:49:12,807 --> 00:49:16,111
I'm shaking, but that could be
from the helicopter crash.
750
00:49:16,177 --> 00:49:20,615
- Get out of my truck, Tracy!
- It's my truck, Shawn!
I paid for it!
751
00:49:20,681 --> 00:49:22,950
Who is this?
Oh, nobody.
752
00:49:23,018 --> 00:49:24,785
You are nobody.
Nobody.
753
00:49:24,852 --> 00:49:28,889
You stay away from her, nobody,
unless you're tired of livin'.
754
00:49:28,956 --> 00:49:33,228
Shawn, while you're here,
do me a favor. Charlene
left a bra in the truck.
755
00:49:33,294 --> 00:49:36,664
Could you make sure
she gets it? Thanks, honey.
756
00:49:36,731 --> 00:49:39,067
Oh! Help!
757
00:49:42,003 --> 00:49:47,042
* No, I can't help myself
Oh **
758
00:50:26,181 --> 00:50:29,016
So where's the driver?
He's in the powder room.
759
00:50:29,084 --> 00:50:32,953
Hell's bells. We're never
gonna get to Santa Fe by 3:00.
760
00:50:33,020 --> 00:50:34,855
This is ridiculous.
Ridiculous.
761
00:50:34,922 --> 00:50:38,926
I really wish he'd hurry.
It just seems
very unprofessional.
762
00:50:43,931 --> 00:50:45,766
Oh!
763
00:50:45,833 --> 00:50:48,503
Oh. Oh, mister,
you gotta help me.
My wife...
764
00:50:48,569 --> 00:50:50,105
She's out back.
She's having a baby.
765
00:50:50,171 --> 00:50:52,140
- She's having a what?
- A baby!
766
00:50:52,207 --> 00:50:54,109
She's having a baby?
And it's halfway out!
767
00:50:54,175 --> 00:50:56,444
I can see the head!
Oh!
768
00:50:56,511 --> 00:50:59,547
- I need your jacket.
- Why?
769
00:50:59,614 --> 00:51:03,851
- Uh, for her amniotic sac!
- Oh!
770
00:51:03,918 --> 00:51:06,554
- Her amniotic fluid...
It's all gushing out.
- Gushing?
771
00:51:06,621 --> 00:51:09,890
The jacket! The jacket!
Give me the jacket!
772
00:51:09,957 --> 00:51:12,760
- And your pants.
- My pants?
773
00:51:12,827 --> 00:51:16,231
Your pants! Yeah, for her,
you know, her "placentia,"
774
00:51:16,297 --> 00:51:19,334
you know,
and her labia and cervical...
775
00:51:19,400 --> 00:51:22,637
Mucus gushing...
It's gushing.
776
00:51:22,703 --> 00:51:26,174
It's just a hole and...
777
00:51:26,241 --> 00:51:28,543
Quick! The pants.
And the hat.
778
00:51:28,609 --> 00:51:31,546
You want my hat?
Why? Why my hat?
779
00:51:31,612 --> 00:51:33,848
Uh, for her, uh,
780
00:51:34,982 --> 00:51:36,917
vagina.
781
00:51:39,420 --> 00:51:42,357
Let's go, ladies.
All aboard. We're on our way.
782
00:51:42,423 --> 00:51:46,961
What happened to Marty?
Marty? Family emergency.
His wife's having a baby.
783
00:51:47,027 --> 00:51:50,798
A baby?
Yes, I'm Owen.
I'm your new driver. Let's go.
784
00:51:50,865 --> 00:51:53,268
Shh. Quiet.
Quiet, everybody.
785
00:51:53,334 --> 00:51:55,403
Simmer down. Hey!
786
00:51:55,470 --> 00:51:59,374
We're gonna be under way
in just a minute.
This is Owen.
787
00:51:59,440 --> 00:52:02,210
He's our new driver.
788
00:52:02,277 --> 00:52:04,845
Everyone say hello.
789
00:52:04,912 --> 00:52:08,683
Hello, Owen!
790
00:52:08,749 --> 00:52:11,452
Our next stop is
the third annual...
791
00:52:11,519 --> 00:52:15,456
I Love Lucy convention
in Santa Fe, New Mexico.
792
00:52:15,523 --> 00:52:19,394
- What do ya say?
- Ba-ba-loo!
793
00:52:33,641 --> 00:52:35,810
Ohh! Ohh!
794
00:52:51,859 --> 00:52:55,930
Is he dead?
Hey, mister,
are you dead?
795
00:52:58,366 --> 00:53:01,402
It's a race.
It's a race.
It's a race.
796
00:53:01,469 --> 00:53:05,906
Run, run,
like greased lightning.
797
00:53:05,973 --> 00:53:09,510
Taxi! Taxi! Taxi!
798
00:53:14,382 --> 00:53:17,552
Not good. Not good.
799
00:53:17,618 --> 00:53:21,289
No, no, no, no.
800
00:53:21,356 --> 00:53:23,991
No, no, no, no.
801
00:53:24,058 --> 00:53:25,860
Don't move!
Stay there.
802
00:53:25,926 --> 00:53:27,995
I saw the whole thing.
I'll be right down.
803
00:53:28,062 --> 00:53:31,599
Oh, shit! Gloria Allred.
804
00:53:31,666 --> 00:53:35,202
Hey, buddy?
Buddy, you okay?
You okay?
805
00:53:35,270 --> 00:53:37,572
Ta-dah!
You're fine!
You look great.
806
00:53:37,638 --> 00:53:39,574
You don't want to
report this, do ya?
Taxi!
807
00:53:39,640 --> 00:53:41,642
You don't need a taxi.
Come on!
808
00:53:41,709 --> 00:53:43,678
Where you goin'?
Maybe I can drop you off.
809
00:53:43,744 --> 00:53:46,547
Silver City, New Mexico.
I am in a race.
810
00:53:46,614 --> 00:53:49,284
Silver City?
This is your lucky day!
No.
811
00:53:49,350 --> 00:53:52,186
I'm going to El Paso.
It's right on the way.
812
00:53:52,253 --> 00:53:56,257
Come on. Oh, but, uh, look,
I got to be there
by 7:00 tonight,
813
00:53:56,324 --> 00:53:59,193
so I'm going to be
driving very fast.
Great.
814
00:53:59,260 --> 00:54:01,696
Yeah!
815
00:54:01,762 --> 00:54:05,433
You just want one copy,
'cause you get an extra one
for half price?
816
00:54:05,500 --> 00:54:07,802
Just one and hurry.
817
00:54:07,868 --> 00:54:09,937
This is the best idea
you ever had.
818
00:54:10,004 --> 00:54:12,607
We split up. We take two keys.
We double our chances
of winning.
819
00:54:12,673 --> 00:54:14,609
It can't fail.
820
00:54:14,675 --> 00:54:17,312
You remember
where we're goin'?
Silver City, New Mexico.
821
00:54:17,378 --> 00:54:20,014
Right. Train station,
locker 001.
822
00:54:20,080 --> 00:54:22,016
"Ero, ero," one.
823
00:54:22,082 --> 00:54:24,785
discretion.
Don't talk to anybody.
824
00:54:24,852 --> 00:54:28,122
I won't. I "romise."
I'm serious. We're
talking about $2 million...
825
00:54:28,188 --> 00:54:29,657
in cash.
826
00:54:29,724 --> 00:54:33,027
People would just kill us
to get their hands on that key.
827
00:54:33,093 --> 00:54:36,230
I love you.
828
00:54:36,297 --> 00:54:38,999
All right, little brother,
you steal a car.
829
00:54:39,066 --> 00:54:41,536
I'm gonna try to steal
that Corvette right there.
830
00:54:41,602 --> 00:54:44,138
I don't care what you get
as long as it's fast.
831
00:54:44,204 --> 00:54:46,774
I'll meet you
in Silver City.
Don't forget your key.
832
00:54:48,543 --> 00:54:51,912
That "other-ucking" bastard!
833
00:54:51,979 --> 00:54:55,049
I'll kill 'im!
I'm gonna...
834
00:54:55,115 --> 00:54:56,917
Whoo!
835
00:54:56,984 --> 00:54:59,954
There he is!
836
00:55:01,221 --> 00:55:03,958
Go! Go!
837
00:55:05,125 --> 00:55:07,728
Okay, we're at 2.4 miles.
838
00:55:07,795 --> 00:55:11,065
There's the yellow sign
with the graffiti. Turn right.
I see it.
839
00:55:11,131 --> 00:55:12,933
Do you see it?
I see it.
840
00:55:13,000 --> 00:55:15,470
I just love this.
This is like
a treasure hunt.
841
00:55:18,172 --> 00:55:20,508
- Slow down!
- I can't!
842
00:55:25,079 --> 00:55:27,147
Help!
843
00:55:56,477 --> 00:56:00,848
But I guess my favorite
episode, if I had to pick a
favorite, would be episode 34.
844
00:56:00,915 --> 00:56:04,785
Ladies, Lucys, Lucys,
stay behind the line, please.
845
00:56:04,852 --> 00:56:07,588
Remember that one when Ricky
wouldn't take his hat off?
846
00:56:07,655 --> 00:56:10,925
I don't remember that one.
It sounds... like a masterpiece.
847
00:56:10,991 --> 00:56:13,794
How about the one where
she got caught in the freezer?
848
00:56:13,861 --> 00:56:17,898
Ma'am? Lucy! You have
to put that out, please.
849
00:56:24,539 --> 00:56:29,477
Uh, Lucy, your hair!
850
00:56:29,544 --> 00:56:33,781
Oh, thank you. You know,
I couldn't decide whether to
keep it up or try something new.
851
00:56:33,848 --> 00:56:36,350
It's on fire!
852
00:56:42,990 --> 00:56:46,861
- Stop the bus!
- We're not stoppin'!
853
00:56:46,927 --> 00:56:49,564
Just put it out!
Just put it out!
854
00:56:49,630 --> 00:56:52,867
Stop!
855
00:56:52,933 --> 00:56:55,536
The bathroom!
856
00:57:23,498 --> 00:57:28,235
Two million dollars.
Two million dollars.
Two million dollars.
857
00:57:28,302 --> 00:57:32,840
Two million dollars.
Two million dollars.
Two million dollars.
858
00:57:32,907 --> 00:57:35,676
The Donald Sinclair,
the billionaire?
859
00:57:35,743 --> 00:57:38,913
It sounds crazy, I know,
but I think it's on the level.
860
00:57:38,979 --> 00:57:41,816
Here's the thing.
We have to decide
yes or no right now.
861
00:57:41,882 --> 00:57:46,587
We're here. If everybody else
had to drive the whole way,
we have a three-hour head start.
862
00:57:46,654 --> 00:57:50,491
- So you're proposing?
- We form a corporation...
Faucet and Schaffer, Inc.
863
00:57:50,558 --> 00:57:54,595
If we win, we split
everything 50-50. Here.
You can even hold the key.
864
00:57:55,963 --> 00:57:58,699
What do ya think?
865
00:57:58,766 --> 00:58:01,301
I don't know what to think.
I'm in shock.
866
00:58:01,368 --> 00:58:06,707
Three hours ago I was sitting
in the airport. I had a job.
I was reading a book.
867
00:58:06,774 --> 00:58:09,276
My grandfather used to say,
"Good things take time.
868
00:58:09,343 --> 00:58:11,879
Great things
happen all at once."
869
00:58:17,752 --> 00:58:22,222
Jason, where'd
you get that?
I found it under the seat.
870
00:58:22,289 --> 00:58:26,493
Give it to me right now.
You can't play that.
Why not?
871
00:58:26,561 --> 00:58:29,964
Because it's Hitler's harmonica.
You can't play
Hitler's harmonica.
872
00:58:30,030 --> 00:58:34,301
- You're driving his car.
- Yes, but I'm not touching it
with my mouth.
873
00:58:34,368 --> 00:58:38,172
I'm not sucking
on the dashboard.
I'm not gettin' his germs.
874
00:58:38,238 --> 00:58:40,207
Dad, look what I found.
875
00:58:40,274 --> 00:58:45,045
- Where'd you get those?
- The floor. Look,
I'm Mrs. Hitler.
876
00:58:45,112 --> 00:58:47,147
All right, take those
off right now.
877
00:58:47,214 --> 00:58:50,117
Hey, look at this.
A lipstick. Ooh, it's dark.
878
00:58:50,184 --> 00:58:52,219
That Eva Braun had style,
didn't she?
879
00:58:52,286 --> 00:58:55,022
- She was Hitler's girlfriend.
- Give us a kiss.
880
00:58:55,089 --> 00:58:57,024
Bev, it's not funny.
Give me that.
881
00:58:57,091 --> 00:59:00,260
Honey!
I got it all over my hand.
882
00:59:00,327 --> 00:59:02,730
Oh! Randy!
883
00:59:08,703 --> 00:59:11,071
* Chain, chain, chain *
* R-E-S-P-E-C-T *
884
00:59:11,138 --> 00:59:13,507
* Chain, chain, chain *
* Find out
what it means to me *
885
00:59:13,574 --> 00:59:16,143
* Respect
Just a little bit *
886
00:59:16,210 --> 00:59:18,679
* Just a little bit *
* Chain, chain, chain... **
887
00:59:18,746 --> 00:59:20,781
* Just... **
888
00:59:21,849 --> 00:59:24,985
Look at us go.
We are zooming.
889
00:59:25,052 --> 00:59:27,387
I told you.
We're haulin' ass.
890
00:59:27,454 --> 00:59:31,191
We're haulin' ass.
All righty.
891
00:59:34,895 --> 00:59:38,398
- Guess what I got back there.
- You just told me.
892
00:59:38,465 --> 00:59:40,768
Ass. We're haulin' ass.
893
00:59:40,835 --> 00:59:43,403
No, no, no.
That's just an expression.
894
00:59:43,470 --> 00:59:45,272
Oh.
895
00:59:46,607 --> 00:59:48,676
It's a heart.
896
00:59:49,844 --> 00:59:54,715
- A heart?
- A human heart.
897
00:59:54,782 --> 00:59:57,852
Some lucky bastard
in El Paso's waiting for it.
898
00:59:57,918 --> 01:00:03,323
Normally, they put it on
a plane, but the airport's
all closed down, so...
899
01:00:07,728 --> 01:00:11,098
- You wanna see it?
- See what?
900
01:00:20,540 --> 01:00:22,609
Are we allowed?
901
01:00:22,677 --> 01:00:26,213
Just take a peek.
One peek. What could happen?
902
01:00:28,048 --> 01:00:31,018
It's a heart.
It needs fresh air.
903
01:00:31,085 --> 01:00:34,054
It's been locked up
in that cooler
for seven hours.
904
01:00:58,946 --> 01:01:00,948
Ohh!
905
01:01:07,888 --> 01:01:09,924
Oh! Oh!
Oopsy-daisy.
906
01:01:09,990 --> 01:01:12,827
Shit!
Oh, please!
I get it. I get it.
907
01:01:12,893 --> 01:01:15,395
Don't step on it!
I think I found it.
908
01:01:15,462 --> 01:01:17,297
No, that's
a caramel apple.
909
01:01:29,844 --> 01:01:32,179
This is wrong.
This is so wrong.
Shh.
910
01:01:32,246 --> 01:01:35,249
God is gonna smote us.
We're gonna get smote.
Shh!
911
01:01:35,315 --> 01:01:38,118
Come on.
We're siphoning gas.
It's not a smoting offense.
912
01:01:38,185 --> 01:01:40,087
What?
913
01:01:46,693 --> 01:01:48,729
Shouldn't be
turning me on,
should it?
914
01:01:52,599 --> 01:01:54,835
- Hey!
- Hi.
915
01:01:54,902 --> 01:01:58,672
- What are you doing?
- Seventeen cups of coffee.
916
01:02:02,042 --> 01:02:05,445
Ah! I guess, uh...
917
01:02:05,512 --> 01:02:08,115
I guess that's it.
Oh.
918
01:02:08,182 --> 01:02:10,785
Oh! I guess not.
919
01:02:10,851 --> 01:02:13,353
Oh. How do you
turn this thing off?
920
01:02:13,420 --> 01:02:15,155
Son of a bitch!
921
01:02:22,629 --> 01:02:26,633
Man! Damn it!
Keep going. Go! Go!
922
01:02:29,136 --> 01:02:31,071
He's stopping.
923
01:02:31,138 --> 01:02:33,207
'Cause he knows,
don't mess with us.
924
01:02:53,160 --> 01:02:56,130
We gotta wait.
There's too much wind.
925
01:02:56,196 --> 01:02:59,733
Guys, I need this balloon.
Hey, what are you doing?
926
01:02:59,800 --> 01:03:01,869
Hey, man, what...
927
01:03:06,340 --> 01:03:08,575
- Hey, hey!
- I know what I'm doing.
928
01:03:08,642 --> 01:03:12,913
Whoo! Whoa!
929
01:03:12,980 --> 01:03:16,383
I'm coming to get you!
Get back here!
930
01:03:21,155 --> 01:03:24,892
I'll get him.
I'm gonna get you,
stupid hardware guy! Ohh!
931
01:03:30,030 --> 01:03:35,569
Go! Go!
Stand up.
Grab the rope.
932
01:03:35,635 --> 01:03:39,239
I'm gonna get you!
Stand up. Ready?
Grab it.
933
01:03:41,375 --> 01:03:43,277
Missed it.
934
01:03:43,343 --> 01:03:47,647
Duane!
Duane, stop the car!
Hang on, buddy.
935
01:03:47,714 --> 01:03:49,683
Duane, please stop.
936
01:03:49,749 --> 01:03:52,286
Oh! Duane!
937
01:03:52,352 --> 01:03:55,655
I got it! I got it!
Just hang on.
938
01:03:55,722 --> 01:04:00,394
Duane!
939
01:04:00,460 --> 01:04:03,363
Whoa!
940
01:04:03,430 --> 01:04:07,834
Stop it! Blaine!
My God!
You're gonna kill me!
941
01:04:08,768 --> 01:04:10,871
The cows!
942
01:04:12,672 --> 01:04:14,541
Whoa!
943
01:04:14,608 --> 01:04:16,510
Move!
944
01:04:20,214 --> 01:04:23,583
Watch out!
945
01:04:42,269 --> 01:04:43,337
Shit.
946
01:04:50,777 --> 01:04:53,613
Duane!
947
01:04:53,680 --> 01:04:55,615
Whoa!
948
01:04:55,682 --> 01:04:57,817
Oh, God!
949
01:05:06,626 --> 01:05:09,463
Help! Hey!
950
01:05:14,101 --> 01:05:16,937
Give me my key.
What are you talking about?
951
01:05:17,004 --> 01:05:19,873
Give me back my key.
What key?
952
01:05:19,940 --> 01:05:21,608
Give me the key.
953
01:05:35,555 --> 01:05:38,592
Uhh!
954
01:06:09,656 --> 01:06:14,361
Blaine! Blaine!
It's me.
955
01:06:14,428 --> 01:06:16,263
Duane!
956
01:06:24,804 --> 01:06:26,373
I got the key.
957
01:06:33,247 --> 01:06:35,682
How's it going,
Captain?
958
01:06:35,749 --> 01:06:37,651
So far, so good.
959
01:06:37,717 --> 01:06:41,921
How about a pit stop?
Sorry. This is
a one-way flight.
960
01:06:41,988 --> 01:06:43,990
There's a bathroom
in the back.
961
01:06:44,058 --> 01:06:46,960
The latch is broken.
Anybody could just come in.
962
01:06:47,027 --> 01:06:51,665
So what? You ain't
got nothing the other Lucys
haven't seen already.
963
01:06:51,731 --> 01:06:54,101
Not necessarily.
964
01:06:54,168 --> 01:06:56,303
Please, would you
stop screaming?
965
01:06:56,370 --> 01:06:58,004
Damn!
966
01:07:00,540 --> 01:07:03,343
Help me!
967
01:07:03,410 --> 01:07:06,146
For God's sake,
help me!
968
01:07:18,925 --> 01:07:21,095
Oh, shit.
969
01:07:21,161 --> 01:07:23,497
Waaaaaah!
970
01:07:26,900 --> 01:07:30,036
Owen!
Owen, what are you doing?
971
01:07:30,104 --> 01:07:32,038
It's a flat tire.
Please, stay on the bus.
972
01:07:32,106 --> 01:07:35,642
Well, you're turning it the wrong way.
I know what I'm doing.
973
01:07:35,709 --> 01:07:39,546
Please, get on the bus. Wait!
Maybe we should
check the oil.
974
01:07:39,613 --> 01:07:43,417
I think you're supposed
to change the air in the
tires every 12,000 miles.
975
01:07:43,483 --> 01:07:46,253
I can fix it.
Give me that!
976
01:07:46,320 --> 01:07:50,023
Wait! No!
That's the spare!
977
01:07:53,760 --> 01:07:58,165
Oh, no! Oh, no!
978
01:07:58,232 --> 01:08:00,567
We'll still catch it.
979
01:08:00,634 --> 01:08:03,403
Oh! Oh!
980
01:08:03,470 --> 01:08:06,606
Ooh, ooh.
981
01:08:09,809 --> 01:08:13,180
Waaaaaah!
982
01:08:25,559 --> 01:08:29,596
No, no.
Turn it around.
Just turn it around.
983
01:08:29,663 --> 01:08:32,866
Please be careful.
Wait, wait, wait.
What is that?
984
01:08:35,068 --> 01:08:38,338
- It's a nickel.
- Would you please
put it in the bag?
985
01:08:55,822 --> 01:09:00,260
Why don't you
check over there?
Maybe it bounced.
986
01:09:02,696 --> 01:09:06,700
- I'm a dead man.
- Don't worry, my friend.
We will find the heart.
987
01:09:06,766 --> 01:09:10,904
I have lost my heart
many times before.
988
01:09:14,708 --> 01:09:16,510
I make a joke...
989
01:09:16,576 --> 01:09:20,680
to help you forget
how screwed you are.
990
01:09:20,747 --> 01:09:25,585
I don't think it got this far.
Let's check down by the road.
991
01:09:25,652 --> 01:09:27,854
Oh, hello. A doggy.
992
01:09:27,921 --> 01:09:30,156
Hello. Hello.
Hello there.
993
01:09:30,224 --> 01:09:32,459
Isn't he a good doggy?
994
01:09:32,526 --> 01:09:35,262
Come on. Come on.
Fetch. Fetch it.
995
01:09:36,996 --> 01:09:39,866
Look at him go. Oh!
996
01:09:41,868 --> 01:09:44,504
- Here, boy!
- Doggy!
997
01:09:44,571 --> 01:09:45,939
Good boy!
998
01:09:50,176 --> 01:09:52,546
It really is
a beautiful car.
Yeah.
999
01:09:52,612 --> 01:09:54,748
I mean,
look at this mahogany.
Gorgeous.
1000
01:09:54,814 --> 01:09:57,951
You just don't see
that anymore, you know?
No.
1001
01:09:58,017 --> 01:10:01,054
I wonder what this is.
Honey, careful.
That's a cigarette lighter.
1002
01:10:01,120 --> 01:10:03,257
No, I don't think
they had those then.
Yes, they did.
1003
01:10:03,323 --> 01:10:06,092
Ow! Oh!
Oh, honey!
Did you burn yourself?
1004
01:10:06,159 --> 01:10:09,429
Yeah. Oh, God!
Oh, I told you.
1005
01:10:09,496 --> 01:10:13,667
Oh, no, no, no. Sorry.
1006
01:10:13,733 --> 01:10:16,303
My husband...
He burned his finger, ma'am.
1007
01:10:16,370 --> 01:10:20,206
- Yeah, he was pulling
and then he was waving...
- Bev, Bev, not helping.
1008
01:10:21,241 --> 01:10:23,277
Hi.
Hi.
1009
01:10:25,745 --> 01:10:28,948
I really like
your dike. Bike.
1010
01:10:30,216 --> 01:10:32,151
It's nice.
1011
01:10:37,324 --> 01:10:41,094
Cut 'em off!
Get in front! Ah!
1012
01:10:41,160 --> 01:10:43,763
Hey!
What are you, nuts?
Get down!
1013
01:10:43,830 --> 01:10:45,875
Kids, stay down!
This thing won't go any faster!
1014
01:10:45,899 --> 01:10:48,402
Stop it!
The headlights!
The headlight!
1015
01:10:48,468 --> 01:10:52,972
Oh, my God!
Are you insane?
This is Hitler's car!
1016
01:11:10,324 --> 01:11:14,461
Honey, go ask them for help.
Tell them everything
that happened.
1017
01:11:14,528 --> 01:11:16,896
And ask them
to call the police.
1018
01:11:16,963 --> 01:11:19,899
And a tow truck.
1019
01:12:03,242 --> 01:12:05,445
Hello.
Hello.
1020
01:12:05,512 --> 01:12:08,047
Are you Harold?
Yes.
1021
01:12:08,114 --> 01:12:10,617
I'm Vicky.
1022
01:12:10,684 --> 01:12:13,687
Are you gonna
invite me in, Harry?
1023
01:12:13,753 --> 01:12:15,922
Or would you rather
party out here
in the hallway?
1024
01:12:15,989 --> 01:12:17,924
Please. Come in.
1025
01:12:22,128 --> 01:12:23,963
Not too shabby.
1026
01:12:25,298 --> 01:12:27,834
Where are you from,
Harry?
From here.
1027
01:12:27,901 --> 01:12:31,638
Las Vegas.
A local boy makes good.
1028
01:12:33,607 --> 01:12:37,411
So, Harry,
what can I do for you?
1029
01:12:37,477 --> 01:12:40,714
Okay. Here's what I want.
1030
01:12:40,780 --> 01:12:43,617
First we both get naked.
1031
01:12:43,683 --> 01:12:48,087
Mmm. So far, so good.
Only we're wearing
sailor hats.
1032
01:12:48,154 --> 01:12:50,356
Mmm.
And then...
1033
01:12:50,424 --> 01:12:54,461
we get into a Jacuzzi...
1034
01:12:54,528 --> 01:12:56,896
f-f-f-filled
with Pepto-Bismol.
1035
01:12:56,963 --> 01:12:58,498
And...
1036
01:12:58,565 --> 01:13:02,168
I clip your toenails,
1037
01:13:02,235 --> 01:13:04,404
and you shave
my buttocks.
1038
01:13:05,805 --> 01:13:07,641
Pardon me?
1039
01:13:07,707 --> 01:13:11,578
Okay, um, naked, um,
Jacuzzi, Pepto-Bismol,
1040
01:13:11,645 --> 01:13:14,614
toenails,
shave my buttocks.
1041
01:13:14,681 --> 01:13:16,650
How much
would that cost?
1042
01:13:16,716 --> 01:13:20,019
Geez, honey,
you have quite an imagination.
1043
01:13:20,086 --> 01:13:22,388
How much would it cost?
1044
01:13:24,390 --> 01:13:26,993
Well, let's see.
1045
01:13:27,060 --> 01:13:30,430
A party like that...
1046
01:13:30,497 --> 01:13:32,466
Three thousand dollars.
1047
01:13:32,532 --> 01:13:36,302
Okay, 3,000.
Who had 3,000?
1048
01:13:36,369 --> 01:13:38,371
Carlton had 2,800.
He's the closest.
1049
01:13:58,858 --> 01:14:01,828
I-I-I think it's okay.
What do you think?
1050
01:14:01,895 --> 01:14:04,798
Wh-Wh-What about
those little holes?
1051
01:14:04,864 --> 01:14:08,101
Are they bite marks?
No, no, no. No, no.
1052
01:14:08,167 --> 01:14:12,205
That's...
That's how it was.
I'm... I'm pretty sure.
1053
01:14:12,271 --> 01:14:14,273
What am I doing?
1054
01:14:14,340 --> 01:14:16,743
I can't go
to El Paso with this.
1055
01:14:16,810 --> 01:14:19,946
Look at it.
It's gonna leak
like a sieve.
1056
01:14:20,013 --> 01:14:24,751
The guy's gonna be alive
for like two minutes
and then, eeeeeee!
1057
01:14:24,818 --> 01:14:26,986
Eeeeeeee!
1058
01:14:30,089 --> 01:14:33,359
A drifter.
A drifter?
1059
01:14:33,426 --> 01:14:37,396
We... We find a drifter,
1060
01:14:37,463 --> 01:14:39,365
kill him,
cut out his heart.
1061
01:14:39,432 --> 01:14:42,101
Nobody's gonna
miss him, right?
I mean, he's a drifter.
1062
01:14:42,168 --> 01:14:44,470
He's an invisible man.
It's a perfect plan.
1063
01:14:44,538 --> 01:14:47,273
Mr. Zack, now you are
giving me the freak-out.
1064
01:14:47,340 --> 01:14:51,545
Where... Where do
I find a drifter?
1065
01:14:57,450 --> 01:15:00,086
Enrico.
Hmm?
1066
01:15:00,153 --> 01:15:03,890
Where did you say
you were from?
Me? I am from Napoli.
1067
01:15:03,957 --> 01:15:08,595
Oh. And-And your family,
they're back there?
1068
01:15:08,662 --> 01:15:12,365
No. No, my papa,
he is dead.
Oh.
1069
01:15:12,431 --> 01:15:17,370
And my mama. All gone.
1070
01:15:17,436 --> 01:15:20,106
Any family? Kids?
1071
01:15:20,173 --> 01:15:22,609
No. No.
1072
01:15:22,676 --> 01:15:26,880
I am completely alone.
1073
01:15:26,946 --> 01:15:29,282
Why, uh...
1074
01:15:29,348 --> 01:15:32,118
Why do you...
1075
01:15:34,821 --> 01:15:37,691
Look, a drifter.
Let's kill him.
1076
01:15:37,757 --> 01:15:39,759
Son of a... Come back here!
1077
01:16:02,081 --> 01:16:05,051
Whatever. Listen, sugar.
You're not going
anywhere today.
1078
01:16:05,118 --> 01:16:07,153
You got a crack
in your radiator.
1079
01:16:07,220 --> 01:16:09,789
That's this big tank
in front of this big engine.
1080
01:16:09,856 --> 01:16:12,959
I know what a radiator is.
Okay, okay. Is there
a place we can rent a car?
1081
01:16:13,026 --> 01:16:15,228
- Albuquerque.
- Okay, look.
1082
01:16:15,294 --> 01:16:17,363
We'll just have
to patch it.
A quick fix.
1083
01:16:17,430 --> 01:16:21,367
- Patch it?
Patch it with what?
- Sand and tire sealant.
1084
01:16:21,434 --> 01:16:25,071
You mix the two together,
it forms an adhesive. It
should last a couple of hours.
1085
01:16:25,138 --> 01:16:27,006
We only have about
30 miles to go?
1086
01:16:27,073 --> 01:16:30,209
Darlin',
we don't have any sand.
1087
01:16:30,276 --> 01:16:33,647
Hello!
We're in the desert!
1088
01:16:39,552 --> 01:16:41,688
We should've
bought a squirrel.
1089
01:16:48,962 --> 01:16:53,066
Mother of mercy!
Where'd you come from?
Car trouble?
1090
01:16:53,132 --> 01:16:57,136
Here. Sit down.
You two look exhausted.
1091
01:16:57,203 --> 01:17:00,139
How long
y'all been out there?
Here. Have something to drink.
1092
01:17:00,206 --> 01:17:02,642
Ladies and gentlemen,
members of the press...
1093
01:17:02,709 --> 01:17:07,013
- What's going on?
- Oh, a bunch of rocket
scientists from L.A.,
1094
01:17:07,080 --> 01:17:09,683
they're trying to break
the land speed record.
1095
01:17:12,551 --> 01:17:16,222
Which is a unique combination
of automotive and aerodynamic
innovation.
1096
01:17:16,289 --> 01:17:18,591
The vehicle, which
we call Lightning II,
1097
01:17:18,658 --> 01:17:20,526
represents three years
of R & D...
1098
01:17:20,593 --> 01:17:23,763
which was conducted
at the California
Institute of Technology.
1099
01:17:23,830 --> 01:17:28,835
The design team was led
by Professor Ken Freedman
and Dr. Richard Kramer.
1100
01:17:28,902 --> 01:17:31,304
We believe
that aerodynamically...
1101
01:17:31,370 --> 01:17:34,140
this is the most perfect
vehicle ever designed.
1102
01:17:34,207 --> 01:17:38,011
The entire vehicle weighs
less than 1,850 pounds.
1103
01:17:38,077 --> 01:17:40,814
The body is a one-piece
Kevlar composite.
1104
01:17:40,880 --> 01:17:43,016
The wheels are
solid billet aluminum,
1105
01:17:43,082 --> 01:17:46,820
and she's powered by twin
JE-79 turbo jet engines,
1106
01:17:46,886 --> 01:17:49,522
the same engines that are
in the F-4 Phantom jet.
1107
01:17:49,588 --> 01:17:51,457
Are there any questions?
1108
01:17:51,524 --> 01:17:53,960
Mr. Calvert,
what is the current
land speed record?
1109
01:17:54,027 --> 01:17:56,129
That would be
742 miles per hour,
1110
01:17:56,195 --> 01:17:58,732
but we hope to have
a new record today.
1111
01:17:58,798 --> 01:18:02,301
- Anyone else?
- How do you start it?
1112
01:18:02,368 --> 01:18:04,437
Ah, good question.
1113
01:18:04,503 --> 01:18:06,949
There's a green lever
to the left of the steering
wheel in the cockpit...
1114
01:18:06,973 --> 01:18:10,009
which engages
the primary thruster,
igniting the JE...
1115
01:18:23,456 --> 01:18:27,360
740, 745... They're gonna
break the sound barrier.
That's a record.
1116
01:18:30,997 --> 01:18:34,200
Well, that's it.
I still don't think
she's gonna hold.
1117
01:18:34,267 --> 01:18:37,403
- What do we owe you?
- Five hundred bucks.
1118
01:18:37,470 --> 01:18:40,874
What?
For what?
For two quarts of sealant?
1119
01:18:40,940 --> 01:18:44,110
No way.
That's 20 bucks tops.
1120
01:18:44,177 --> 01:18:46,880
Okay, here's 40 dollars.
That's double what
it's worth, okay?
1121
01:18:46,946 --> 01:18:48,915
Come on, Nick.
Let's go.
1122
01:18:50,549 --> 01:18:53,787
- Hold it.
- Whoa. Hey, hey, hey.
1123
01:18:53,853 --> 01:18:56,522
Come on.
Another little tool
no mechanic should be without.
1124
01:18:56,589 --> 01:18:58,691
All right. Fine, fine.
1125
01:18:58,758 --> 01:19:02,195
Here's your $500.
But you know what,
Billy Ray?
1126
01:19:02,261 --> 01:19:04,330
What goes around,
comes around.
1127
01:19:04,397 --> 01:19:06,332
This is so unchristian.
1128
01:19:06,399 --> 01:19:09,202
Unchristian?
1129
01:19:09,268 --> 01:19:12,638
Well, if the good Lord
don't like the way
I conduct business,
1130
01:19:12,705 --> 01:19:14,640
let Him say something.
1131
01:19:14,707 --> 01:19:16,709
Let Him give me a sign.
1132
01:19:16,776 --> 01:19:20,579
Oh, Lord, I'm here
and I'm listening!
1133
01:19:20,646 --> 01:19:22,849
Hello!
1134
01:19:24,183 --> 01:19:27,887
Whoa!
1135
01:19:27,954 --> 01:19:31,925
Mach one!
We did it!
We did it!
1136
01:19:34,627 --> 01:19:37,263
Oh! Ohh!
1137
01:19:37,330 --> 01:19:40,967
Hey, everybody okay?
You all right? Yeah?
1138
01:19:41,034 --> 01:19:44,637
Randy, you okay?
There's no Ink, Inc.
1139
01:19:44,703 --> 01:19:47,807
What?
There's no job. No.
1140
01:19:49,475 --> 01:19:51,577
It's a race. We're racing.
1141
01:19:51,644 --> 01:19:53,913
Donald Sinclair put
$2 million in a locker.
1142
01:19:53,980 --> 01:19:57,116
And I wanna get there first.
1143
01:19:57,183 --> 01:20:01,187
I do not want
to work at Home Depot!
1144
01:20:25,811 --> 01:20:27,313
Ah!
1145
01:20:32,151 --> 01:20:34,453
Okay, people,
back on the bus.
1146
01:20:34,520 --> 01:20:36,555
George, don't eat that.
1147
01:20:36,622 --> 01:20:40,026
Get back on the bus!
Come on. Back on the bus.
1148
01:20:40,093 --> 01:20:42,161
Simon, put that down.
1149
01:20:42,228 --> 01:20:45,932
You too.
Back on the bus.
Come on, everyone!
1150
01:20:45,999 --> 01:20:49,335
We don't wanna miss dinner.
It's macaroni night!
1151
01:20:49,402 --> 01:20:52,171
Come on.
1152
01:20:52,238 --> 01:20:54,273
We came in
the rocket car.
1153
01:20:54,340 --> 01:20:58,912
Oh, a rocket car.
Let's hear all
about that on the bus.
1154
01:20:58,978 --> 01:21:00,947
All right,
so we can still win,
1155
01:21:01,014 --> 01:21:03,983
but we have
to leave now, all right?
1156
01:21:04,050 --> 01:21:06,652
So, come on.
Dad.
1157
01:21:06,719 --> 01:21:08,922
It's been a living hell.
1158
01:21:08,988 --> 01:21:12,791
Bev, it's...
It's $2 million.
1159
01:21:12,858 --> 01:21:16,095
That's a lifetime supply
of hummus.
1160
01:21:23,102 --> 01:21:26,705
Okay. Okay. Yeah.
1161
01:21:26,772 --> 01:21:29,575
I've been selfish.
I understand.
1162
01:21:29,642 --> 01:21:32,979
I'm sorry. Really.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1163
01:21:33,046 --> 01:21:37,250
I'm sorry.
I almost got us killed.
1164
01:21:41,754 --> 01:21:43,889
God!
1165
01:21:52,031 --> 01:21:55,634
- Hi, everybody. Miss me?
- Hey!
1166
01:21:55,701 --> 01:21:59,238
Listen. Just to show
there's no hard feelings,
chocolate shakes all around.
1167
01:21:59,305 --> 01:22:02,275
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
1168
01:22:02,341 --> 01:22:05,411
I'm a little disappointed,
but I'm an adult.
1169
01:22:05,478 --> 01:22:08,014
So drink these up, and then
we'll return the Nazi-mobile.
1170
01:22:08,081 --> 01:22:11,817
We'll get that van fixed,
and we'll go back to Vegas
and see David Copperfield!
1171
01:22:11,884 --> 01:22:15,921
Yea! Okay,
drink up, buddy!
1172
01:22:15,989 --> 01:22:17,723
Is it good?
Mm-hmm.
1173
01:22:17,790 --> 01:22:19,592
Drink it up, honey.
1174
01:22:22,261 --> 01:22:25,664
Owen, don't feel bad.
1175
01:22:25,731 --> 01:22:28,401
It's not your fault.
We'll tell the company.
1176
01:22:28,467 --> 01:22:30,903
- We won't let them fire you.
- No.
1177
01:22:30,970 --> 01:22:33,372
I'm no bus driver.
Don't say that.
1178
01:22:33,439 --> 01:22:36,775
No. I'm not.
I'm not a bus driver.
1179
01:22:36,842 --> 01:22:39,545
Oh, you mustn't be
so hard on yourself.
1180
01:22:39,612 --> 01:22:43,082
Hey, everybody,
who's the world's
greatest bus driver?
1181
01:22:43,149 --> 01:22:47,720
Owen! Owen! Owen!
Owen! Owen! Owen!
1182
01:22:47,786 --> 01:22:51,390
Owen! Owen! Owen!
No, no. No, no, no.
Listen. Listen. No, no!
1183
01:22:51,457 --> 01:22:55,628
No! No! Shut up,
you crazy Lucy bitches!
Shut up!
1184
01:22:55,694 --> 01:22:57,796
Owen! Owen. Owe...
1185
01:22:57,863 --> 01:23:00,533
I am not a bus driver!
1186
01:23:00,599 --> 01:23:04,703
I do not work
for the bus company!
All right?
1187
01:23:04,770 --> 01:23:09,475
I needed a ride
to New Mexico,
so I stole this uniform!
1188
01:23:09,542 --> 01:23:13,346
- See this jacket?
This is not my jacket!
- Oh, no!
1189
01:23:13,412 --> 01:23:15,348
Remember Marty,
the bus driver? Huh?
1190
01:23:15,414 --> 01:23:19,585
This is his shirt!
I stole it!
1191
01:23:19,652 --> 01:23:22,121
And these pants,
you think I'd
wear these pants?
1192
01:23:22,188 --> 01:23:24,557
- These aren't my pants!
- Ohh!
1193
01:23:24,623 --> 01:23:27,393
These are Marty's pants.
I stole them.
1194
01:23:30,363 --> 01:23:34,033
I am not... a bus driver.
1195
01:23:35,768 --> 01:23:39,505
You're not
a real bus driver?
1196
01:23:39,572 --> 01:23:41,774
You lied to us!
1197
01:23:41,840 --> 01:23:45,578
- He ruined
our whole vacation!
1198
01:23:54,487 --> 01:23:58,291
Here they come.
They're all within 50 miles.
1199
01:23:58,357 --> 01:24:01,026
It's the final lap.
Mr. Grisham.
1200
01:24:01,094 --> 01:24:04,197
Now, the airport's back
on-line, so I want you
to take the Lear jet,
1201
01:24:04,263 --> 01:24:07,666
scoot on down to Silver City
and give us a play-by-play
from the finish line.
1202
01:24:07,733 --> 01:24:09,635
Yes, sir.
1203
01:24:09,702 --> 01:24:11,637
Yes!
1204
01:24:34,193 --> 01:24:38,164
Let's go back to Vegas.
Oh! Oh!
1205
01:24:38,231 --> 01:24:41,267
Bev, Bev, wake...
Come on. Wake up. Wake up.
1206
01:24:41,334 --> 01:24:44,203
Bev, wake up. Wake up.
Third Reich's here.
Come on.
1207
01:24:44,270 --> 01:24:46,239
Get down. You wanna
have a nice life.
1208
01:24:46,305 --> 01:24:49,742
Okay, okay.
Think. Think.
S.S. in the parking lot.
1209
01:24:49,808 --> 01:24:51,644
Not good.
Not good. Think.
1210
01:24:54,213 --> 01:24:56,415
Hi, honey.
1211
01:24:56,482 --> 01:24:59,452
- They gonna
be all right?
- Yeah.
1212
01:24:59,518 --> 01:25:03,189
- Friend, uh, I don't think there's room.
- No.
1213
01:25:04,823 --> 01:25:06,659
This one's little.
1214
01:25:08,527 --> 01:25:11,630
- There it is. There it is!
- Silver City.
We're almost there.
1215
01:25:11,697 --> 01:25:14,133
Yeah! Go!
1216
01:25:24,410 --> 01:25:28,247
* I believe in miracles *
1217
01:25:28,314 --> 01:25:30,883
* Where you from *
1218
01:25:30,949 --> 01:25:33,786
* You sexy thing *
* Sexy thing, you *
1219
01:25:33,852 --> 01:25:37,256
* I believe in miracles *
1220
01:25:37,323 --> 01:25:39,124
* Since you came along *
1221
01:25:39,192 --> 01:25:41,327
* You sexy thing *
1222
01:25:52,137 --> 01:25:56,675
* Where did you
come from, baby *
1223
01:25:56,742 --> 01:26:01,247
* How did you know
I needed you *
1224
01:26:01,314 --> 01:26:05,784
* How did you know
I needed you so badly *
1225
01:26:05,851 --> 01:26:10,155
* How did you know
I'd give my heart gladly *
1226
01:26:16,829 --> 01:26:18,664
* Ahhhh *
1227
01:26:18,731 --> 01:26:22,301
* It's ecstasy *
* You sexy thing *
1228
01:26:23,702 --> 01:26:27,506
* Sexy, baby *
* You sexy thing **
1229
01:26:27,573 --> 01:26:31,043
Whoa! Whoa!
Whoa! Whoa!
1230
01:26:42,120 --> 01:26:44,290
Where the fuck are we?
1231
01:27:49,788 --> 01:27:53,191
There were two guys
in there.
1232
01:27:53,258 --> 01:27:55,227
Where'd they go?
Hey!
1233
01:27:55,294 --> 01:27:58,297
Thanks for the truck,
buddy!
1234
01:28:31,296 --> 01:28:33,366
Ohhh.
1235
01:28:56,789 --> 01:28:58,691
Ohh.
1236
01:29:00,292 --> 01:29:02,461
- Yeah.
- Silver City.
1237
01:29:02,528 --> 01:29:04,630
Next stop, Silver City.
1238
01:29:04,697 --> 01:29:08,166
Silver City?
It is the finish line.
1239
01:29:08,233 --> 01:29:11,537
I made it. I made it!
1240
01:29:13,472 --> 01:29:17,643
The key.
Where is the key?
1241
01:29:20,513 --> 01:29:23,782
What have we...
Where is the key,
my little baby?
1242
01:29:23,849 --> 01:29:26,885
- Excuse me.
- I think I am
touching it.
1243
01:29:26,952 --> 01:29:30,923
Get away from him.
I can feel it. I can feel it.
It's very small.
1244
01:29:30,989 --> 01:29:35,428
I'm calling the conductor!
I have it! I got it!
1245
01:29:35,494 --> 01:29:38,764
Wait! Wait!
Come back! Don't leave me!
1246
01:29:43,469 --> 01:29:46,605
Come on!
Come on, baby!
1247
01:29:48,173 --> 01:29:49,908
Giddyap!
1248
01:29:54,046 --> 01:29:57,983
Come on, baby.
Just one more mile.
1249
01:29:58,050 --> 01:30:00,486
Just one mile.
Come on!
1250
01:30:01,687 --> 01:30:03,589
Randy?
1251
01:30:04,757 --> 01:30:06,759
Hey, honey,
how'd you sleep?
1252
01:30:12,030 --> 01:30:13,466
Ah!
1253
01:30:14,733 --> 01:30:17,870
- Pass. Pass him.
- I can't. We're too big.
1254
01:30:17,936 --> 01:30:22,007
There's Silver City.
We're here. Move!
1255
01:30:23,976 --> 01:30:26,612
They stopped.
No.
1256
01:30:26,679 --> 01:30:31,116
They're moving. Look.
1257
01:30:40,626 --> 01:30:44,429
Come on, Dad!
Let's go!
1258
01:30:44,497 --> 01:30:46,499
I can smell it.
1259
01:30:46,565 --> 01:30:50,603
* Daisy, daisy *
1260
01:30:50,669 --> 01:30:54,106
* Give me
your answer true *
1261
01:30:54,172 --> 01:30:58,043
* Daisy, daisy **
1262
01:31:05,518 --> 01:31:08,487
Hey! Hey!
Stop the bus! Stop the bus!
1263
01:31:08,554 --> 01:31:13,091
- We gotta get off!
- Whoa. Ladies, ladies, ladies.
You know the rules.
1264
01:31:13,158 --> 01:31:15,193
We're not crazy, lady.
1265
01:31:15,260 --> 01:31:17,238
We should've
bought a squirrel.
We didn't buy a squirrel.
1266
01:31:17,262 --> 01:31:19,898
- Which is why
we stole the rocket car.
- We can still win.
1267
01:31:19,965 --> 01:31:23,285
If you don't tell that driver
to open the door, I'm gonna
crush you like a cockroach.
1268
01:31:23,335 --> 01:31:25,671
Open the door!
Tell him! Tell him!
1269
01:31:25,738 --> 01:31:27,773
Open the door.
Thank you!
1270
01:31:50,863 --> 01:31:55,868
I-I-I-I-I-I...
1271
01:31:55,934 --> 01:31:57,803
It's Pollini.
1272
01:31:57,870 --> 01:32:00,205
Enrico Pollini
on a train.
1273
01:32:00,272 --> 01:32:04,376
- He just rolled
into the station.
- Well, what do you know?
1274
01:32:04,442 --> 01:32:06,444
Rip Van Winkle
pulled it off.
1275
01:32:06,511 --> 01:32:08,614
You gotta love a long shot.
1276
01:32:33,138 --> 01:32:36,008
It's here. It's here.
1277
01:32:36,074 --> 01:32:38,510
- It's here.
- Here he comes.
1278
01:32:38,577 --> 01:32:41,413
It's you.
He's holding the key.
1279
01:32:41,479 --> 01:32:43,515
Ah.
1280
01:32:43,582 --> 01:32:45,851
And he's going
to the locker.
1281
01:32:47,419 --> 01:32:51,089
Mr. Pollini,
well done, sir.
And congratulations.
1282
01:32:51,156 --> 01:32:54,292
On behalf
of Mr. Donald Sinclair,
the Venetian Hotel and Casino...
1283
01:33:00,498 --> 01:33:03,602
Mr. Grisham,
is it over?
1284
01:33:10,375 --> 01:33:12,177
Get out of the way!
Open it!
1285
01:33:19,685 --> 01:33:21,687
He's sleeping.
1286
01:33:41,640 --> 01:33:44,710
Did I win?
1287
01:33:44,777 --> 01:33:46,945
Vicky. You let go
of this bag,
1288
01:33:47,012 --> 01:33:50,548
or I swear to God,
I'll report you
to the escort service.
1289
01:33:50,615 --> 01:33:53,118
Uh, Mr. Grisham,
what's going on?
1290
01:33:53,185 --> 01:33:56,922
The hooker... The hooker...
The hooker is taking the money.
1291
01:33:56,989 --> 01:34:00,826
What hooker?
Vicky.
From the hotel.
1292
01:34:00,893 --> 01:34:04,429
Pepto-Bismol?
Vicky, I told you
to wait in the car.
1293
01:34:04,496 --> 01:34:07,165
What the hell
is she doing there?
I brought her.
1294
01:34:07,232 --> 01:34:10,969
I'm sorry, Mr. Sinclair.
She said she liked me.
1295
01:34:11,036 --> 01:34:14,506
I'm beginning to think
she was only interested
in the money!
1296
01:34:19,077 --> 01:34:21,680
Come with me.
I'll drive.
1297
01:34:35,027 --> 01:34:38,997
So long, suckers!
Whoo!
1298
01:34:45,203 --> 01:34:48,173
The bus! The bus.
You wanna steal a bus?
1299
01:34:48,240 --> 01:34:51,676
Yes, I do.
My God,
what have I done?
1300
01:34:51,744 --> 01:34:54,546
Help! Somebody help me!
1301
01:34:57,482 --> 01:35:00,318
- Aah!
- This thing's got
a mind of its own.
1302
01:35:06,892 --> 01:35:09,427
- Finders keepers, pal.
- That's mine.
1303
01:35:09,494 --> 01:35:11,764
I see it!
I see it! Relax!
1304
01:35:14,800 --> 01:35:18,670
Oh, no! Oh!
1305
01:35:24,676 --> 01:35:26,845
It means it's a scratch.
Nobody wins.
1306
01:35:26,912 --> 01:35:30,648
Bullshit. I'll tell you
what it means. It means
we're going into extra innings.
1307
01:35:30,715 --> 01:35:33,852
Carla, call the airport.
Tell them to get
my other Lear ready.
1308
01:35:33,919 --> 01:35:37,031
Gordon, you stay here
and keep your eye on the board.
Tell us where they're going.
1309
01:35:37,055 --> 01:35:40,993
Gentlemen, grab your drinks.
We're going to Silver City.
1310
01:35:51,303 --> 01:35:53,238
Is that it?
That's it.
1311
01:35:53,305 --> 01:35:55,707
Thank the pilot.
Tell him to level off.
1312
01:35:55,774 --> 01:35:58,811
All right,
who had Mr. Kimiche?
1313
01:35:58,877 --> 01:36:01,146
- It was me.
- Well done!
1314
01:36:01,213 --> 01:36:04,216
Congratulations.
Very good.
1315
01:36:07,252 --> 01:36:09,221
Keep going!
1316
01:36:09,287 --> 01:36:12,257
Come on!
1317
01:36:12,324 --> 01:36:14,960
There it is.
It's coming down
right there.
1318
01:36:31,276 --> 01:36:33,345
Where is it?
There it is.
1319
01:36:33,411 --> 01:36:35,280
Get it!
1320
01:36:38,183 --> 01:36:41,653
Get it! Get it!
Grab that money!
1321
01:36:41,719 --> 01:36:43,822
Get it down!
1322
01:36:49,761 --> 01:36:52,530
**
1323
01:37:01,606 --> 01:37:03,909
- Now, that is one hell of an entrance.
- Whoa!
1324
01:37:03,976 --> 01:37:05,844
It's Smash Mouth!
1325
01:37:05,911 --> 01:37:08,480
What's going on over here?
1326
01:37:09,747 --> 01:37:11,783
What's this?
Money.
1327
01:37:11,850 --> 01:37:13,986
Jesus,
how much is this?
1328
01:37:14,052 --> 01:37:16,354
Two million dollars.
Two...
1329
01:37:16,421 --> 01:37:20,525
Two million...
Two million dollars,
everybody!
1330
01:37:22,928 --> 01:37:25,130
Two million dollars!
1331
01:37:25,197 --> 01:37:28,100
On the bus,
we talked about it,
1332
01:37:28,166 --> 01:37:32,104
and we decide
to share all the money.
1333
01:37:32,170 --> 01:37:35,273
They're gonna share
all the money, everybody!
1334
01:37:35,340 --> 01:37:38,110
Oh, man!
1335
01:37:38,176 --> 01:37:40,879
Yeah, let's get
these guys some jackets.
1336
01:37:40,946 --> 01:37:43,281
Get these jack...
Get these jackets
over here.
1337
01:37:44,883 --> 01:37:48,220
So what's the story, man?
Are you guys some kind
of organization?
1338
01:37:48,286 --> 01:37:52,090
What's going on?
No, no. We just met
this morning.
1339
01:37:52,157 --> 01:37:55,227
They just met
this morning, everybody!
1340
01:37:55,293 --> 01:37:56,661
Oh, my God!
1341
01:37:56,728 --> 01:37:59,831
I almost didn't come along,
but then I met Tracy and...
1342
01:37:59,898 --> 01:38:02,034
Well, great things
happen all at once.
1343
01:38:02,100 --> 01:38:05,370
Oh, this is
beautiful, baby.
This is beautiful. Oh!
1344
01:38:05,437 --> 01:38:07,940
Great things happen,
I don't know.
1345
01:38:08,974 --> 01:38:10,875
Feed the earth, baby.
Feed the earth.
1346
01:38:10,943 --> 01:38:15,080
We're gonna check
the tote board right now
and see where we're at. Okay?
1347
01:38:15,147 --> 01:38:18,516
Come on, baby.
Let it roll.
Come on, baby.
1348
01:38:24,489 --> 01:38:26,291
No! No!
1349
01:38:26,358 --> 01:38:29,527
- No, no, no!
- You don't understand.
1350
01:38:34,933 --> 01:38:39,704
Excuse me.
We work for Feed the Earth.
1351
01:38:39,771 --> 01:38:43,175
And these are some
of our children.
1352
01:38:45,543 --> 01:38:50,615
I don't know
who you people are
or where you came from,
1353
01:38:50,682 --> 01:38:53,986
but... God bless you.
1354
01:38:55,253 --> 01:38:57,022
Tonight,
1355
01:38:57,089 --> 01:38:59,657
you've given
to these kids...
1356
01:38:59,724 --> 01:39:04,896
and their brothers and sisters
all over the world
more than money.
1357
01:39:04,963 --> 01:39:08,800
You've given them back
their faith,
1358
01:39:08,866 --> 01:39:11,069
their faith
in the goodness of people.
1359
01:39:18,643 --> 01:39:24,049
She said, "You are just
like the 12 disciples."
1360
01:39:25,683 --> 01:39:27,285
Aw!
1361
01:39:30,688 --> 01:39:33,291
Aw!
1362
01:39:33,358 --> 01:39:35,027
Thank you.
1363
01:40:22,874 --> 01:40:24,809
Forget it.
1364
01:40:24,876 --> 01:40:27,688
Look, all these other disciples
can do whatever they want
with their share.
1365
01:40:27,712 --> 01:40:29,847
- But this money is going home with us.
- What?
1366
01:40:29,914 --> 01:40:33,318
Period. End of story.
Put the money
in the bag, carrot.
1367
01:40:37,089 --> 01:40:40,825
You don't
know me, man.
1368
01:40:40,892 --> 01:40:42,727
Come here.
1369
01:40:45,097 --> 01:40:47,199
It's you.
1370
01:40:48,433 --> 01:40:51,269
I'm so proud of you.
1371
01:40:51,336 --> 01:40:54,439
Giving away
all of your money?
1372
01:40:56,608 --> 01:41:00,312
Whoo! Whoo!
1373
01:41:02,680 --> 01:41:05,450
Whoo!
1374
01:41:05,517 --> 01:41:07,419
Come on.
1375
01:41:09,387 --> 01:41:12,824
Duane.
No. No. No.
1376
01:41:16,161 --> 01:41:19,364
Mama is watching us
from heaven right now.
1377
01:41:21,866 --> 01:41:23,801
And what would she do?
1378
01:41:27,639 --> 01:41:31,443
It's for starving
children, Duane.
1379
01:41:33,711 --> 01:41:35,547
Do it for Mom.
1380
01:41:48,726 --> 01:41:51,729
Yeah! Whoo!
Whoo!
1381
01:41:57,235 --> 01:42:00,037
Whoo! Yeah!
1382
01:42:00,104 --> 01:42:01,939
Excuse me,
ladies and gentlemen.
1383
01:42:02,006 --> 01:42:05,177
Um, I'd like to introduce
the real star
of tonight's show.
1384
01:42:05,243 --> 01:42:09,247
I can honestly say that none
of us would be here tonight
if it wasn't for this man.
1385
01:42:09,314 --> 01:42:12,817
He is the man
with the plan,
Mr. Donald Sinclair!
1386
01:42:12,884 --> 01:42:14,619
What?
1387
01:42:14,686 --> 01:42:17,555
One of the wealthiest
men in the world!
1388
01:42:19,023 --> 01:42:22,126
Ladies and gentlemen,
Mr. Donald Sinclair!
You are the man.
1389
01:42:22,194 --> 01:42:25,096
Put the camera on him.
There you go. Nice shot.
There he is.
1390
01:42:25,163 --> 01:42:27,265
Hi. Hello.
1391
01:42:27,332 --> 01:42:30,502
These men, they didn't
have to be here tonight.
1392
01:42:30,568 --> 01:42:32,937
No, they could be off
kicking back in the Riviera...
1393
01:42:33,004 --> 01:42:36,641
or in Vegas blowing
their money on some
meaningless idiotic bet.
1394
01:42:36,708 --> 01:42:38,310
Ha, ha, ha.
1395
01:42:38,376 --> 01:42:40,445
They couldn't do that,
1396
01:42:40,512 --> 01:42:42,980
not when there were children
going to bed hungry
every night.
1397
01:42:43,047 --> 01:42:45,817
Isn't that right,
fellas?
1398
01:42:45,883 --> 01:42:47,752
Whatever.
1399
01:42:47,819 --> 01:42:50,588
Mr. Donald Sinclair
and his partners...
1400
01:42:50,655 --> 01:42:53,791
want you and the millions
of people watching at home...
1401
01:42:53,858 --> 01:42:56,928
to know they plan
to match whatever
you raise tonight...
1402
01:42:56,994 --> 01:42:59,063
dollar for dollar!
Aah!
1403
01:42:59,130 --> 01:43:00,732
Dollar for dollar!
Dollar for dollar!
1404
01:43:03,301 --> 01:43:05,737
A matching fund, everybody!
1405
01:43:05,803 --> 01:43:08,306
Let's hit the phones
out there and crank it up...
1406
01:43:08,373 --> 01:43:11,243
because we're gonna feed
the whole world tonight!
1407
01:43:12,477 --> 01:43:15,012
* Somebody once told me *
1408
01:43:15,079 --> 01:43:17,515
* The world
is gonna roll me *
1409
01:43:17,582 --> 01:43:21,419
* I ain't the sharpest
tool in the shed *
1410
01:43:21,486 --> 01:43:23,755
* And she was lookin'
kind of dumb *
1411
01:43:23,821 --> 01:43:25,957
* With a finger
and a thumb *
1412
01:43:26,023 --> 01:43:30,728
- * In the shape of an "L"
on her forehead *
1413
01:43:30,795 --> 01:43:33,731
* Well, the years start comin'
and they don't stop comin' *
1414
01:43:33,798 --> 01:43:35,933
* Fed to the rules and
I hit the ground runnin' *
1415
01:43:36,000 --> 01:43:38,035
* Didn't make sense
not to live for fun *
1416
01:43:38,102 --> 01:43:40,572
* Your brain gets smart
but your head gets dumb *
1417
01:43:40,638 --> 01:43:42,073
* So much to do
So much to see *
1418
01:43:42,139 --> 01:43:44,809
* So what's wrong with
takin' the back streets *
1419
01:43:44,876 --> 01:43:46,811
* You'll never know
if you don't go *
1420
01:43:46,878 --> 01:43:49,046
* You'll never shine
if you don't glow *
1421
01:43:49,113 --> 01:43:53,885
* Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play *
1422
01:43:53,951 --> 01:43:58,690
* Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid *
1423
01:43:58,756 --> 01:44:01,726
* All that glitters
is gold *
1424
01:44:01,793 --> 01:44:05,830
* Only shooting stars
break the mold *
1425
01:44:07,499 --> 01:44:09,109
* It's a cool place and
they say it gets colder *
1426
01:44:09,133 --> 01:44:11,603
* You're bundled up now
Wait till you get older *
1427
01:44:11,669 --> 01:44:13,605
* But the meteor men
beg to differ *
1428
01:44:13,671 --> 01:44:15,516
* Judgin' by the hole
in the satellite picture *
1429
01:44:15,540 --> 01:44:17,675
* The ice we skate
is gettin' pretty thin *
1430
01:44:17,742 --> 01:44:20,211
* The water's gettin' warm
so you might as well swim *
1431
01:44:20,278 --> 01:44:22,547
* My world's on fire
How about yours *
1432
01:44:22,614 --> 01:44:25,550
* That's the way I like it
and I'll never get bored *
1433
01:44:25,617 --> 01:44:29,587
* Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play *
1434
01:44:29,654 --> 01:44:33,758
* Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid *
1435
01:44:33,825 --> 01:44:37,261
* All that glitters is gold *
1436
01:44:37,329 --> 01:44:42,934
* Only shooting stars
break the mold *
1437
01:44:46,237 --> 01:44:48,606
* Go for the moon *
1438
01:44:49,641 --> 01:44:52,810
* Go for the moon *
1439
01:44:54,512 --> 01:44:57,248
* Go for the moon *
1440
01:44:57,315 --> 01:45:00,885
* Oh, yeah, go for the moon *
1441
01:45:00,952 --> 01:45:04,356
* Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play *
1442
01:45:04,422 --> 01:45:09,060
* Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid *
1443
01:45:09,126 --> 01:45:12,364
* All that glitters is gold *
1444
01:45:12,430 --> 01:45:15,266
* Only shooting stars *
1445
01:45:15,333 --> 01:45:20,004
* Somebody once asked could
I spare some change for gas *
1446
01:45:20,071 --> 01:45:24,108
* I need to get myself
away from this place *
1447
01:45:24,175 --> 01:45:25,710
* I said yep, what a concept *
1448
01:45:25,777 --> 01:45:28,312
* I could use
a little fuel myself *
1449
01:45:28,380 --> 01:45:33,017
* And we all could use
a little change *
1450
01:45:33,084 --> 01:45:35,787
* Well, the years start comin'
and they don't stop comin' *
1451
01:45:35,853 --> 01:45:37,130
* Fed to the rules and
I hit the ground runnin' *
1452
01:45:37,154 --> 01:45:39,691
* Didn't make sense
not to live for fun *
1453
01:45:39,757 --> 01:45:41,859
* Your brain gets smart
but your head gets dumb *
1454
01:45:41,926 --> 01:45:43,961
* So much to do
So much to see *
1455
01:45:44,028 --> 01:45:46,297
* So what's wrong with
takin' the back streets *
1456
01:45:46,364 --> 01:45:47,741
* You'll never know
if you don't go *
1457
01:45:47,765 --> 01:45:50,334
* You'll never shine
if you don't glow *
1458
01:45:50,402 --> 01:45:54,171
* Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play *
1459
01:45:54,238 --> 01:45:59,243
* Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid *
1460
01:45:59,310 --> 01:46:02,079
* All that glitters is gold *
1461
01:46:02,146 --> 01:46:07,419
* Only shooting stars
break the mold *
1462
01:46:07,485 --> 01:46:10,988
* All that glitters is gold *
1463
01:46:11,055 --> 01:46:17,962
* Only shooting stars
break the mold **
1464
01:46:19,431 --> 01:46:21,466
Thank you. Good night!
1465
01:46:37,148 --> 01:46:39,984
* Well, I wake up in the morning
each and every day *
1466
01:46:42,086 --> 01:46:44,889
* And I sit down at the table
and I hear my daddy say *
1467
01:46:46,924 --> 01:46:49,427
* Life is nothing
It's a nothing *
1468
01:46:49,494 --> 01:46:51,896
* Life is nothing
but a slap in the face *
1469
01:46:51,963 --> 01:46:54,432
* Life is nothing
It's a nothing *
1470
01:46:54,499 --> 01:46:56,701
* Life is nothing
but a fat rat race *
1471
01:46:56,768 --> 01:46:59,170
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1472
01:46:59,236 --> 01:47:01,573
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1473
01:47:01,639 --> 01:47:04,108
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1474
01:47:04,175 --> 01:47:07,111
* Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah *
1475
01:47:07,178 --> 01:47:09,947
* Have you ever had a dream that
you're taking off your dress *
1476
01:47:12,116 --> 01:47:15,019
* The only thing you're wearing
is a button on your chest *
1477
01:47:16,888 --> 01:47:19,457
* And the button
it says nothing *
1478
01:47:19,524 --> 01:47:21,793
* Life is nothing
but a slap in the face *
1479
01:47:21,859 --> 01:47:24,496
* Life is nothing
It's a nothing *
1480
01:47:24,562 --> 01:47:26,698
* Life is nothing
but a fat rat race *
1481
01:47:26,764 --> 01:47:31,536
* What is life *
1482
01:47:31,603 --> 01:47:34,506
* What is life *
1483
01:47:34,572 --> 01:47:36,941
* A rat race *
* A rat race *
1484
01:47:37,008 --> 01:47:41,679
* What is life *
1485
01:47:41,746 --> 01:47:44,415
* What is life *
1486
01:47:44,482 --> 01:47:45,883
* A rat race *
1487
01:47:45,950 --> 01:47:48,520
* A rat race *
* A rat race *
1488
01:47:48,586 --> 01:47:51,623
* A rat-rat race *
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1489
01:47:51,689 --> 01:47:53,991
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1490
01:47:54,058 --> 01:47:57,128
* Ooh, yeah, yeah
Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1491
01:47:57,194 --> 01:48:00,164
* It's a jungle out there
and I know I don't belong *
1492
01:48:01,999 --> 01:48:05,236
* So all night long
I just sing my stupid song *
1493
01:48:07,238 --> 01:48:09,674
* Get a body out
in the rat, in the race *
1494
01:48:09,741 --> 01:48:12,409
* Get a body out
in the rat, in the race *
1495
01:48:12,476 --> 01:48:14,679
* Get a body out in the rat *
1496
01:48:14,746 --> 01:48:18,716
**
1497
01:48:18,783 --> 01:48:22,119
* To the sound of the storm
comin' strictly from
the B-A-H-A M-E-N *
1498
01:48:22,186 --> 01:48:24,255
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1499
01:48:24,321 --> 01:48:26,558
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1500
01:48:26,624 --> 01:48:29,193
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1501
01:48:29,260 --> 01:48:31,696
* Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah *
1502
01:48:31,763 --> 01:48:34,932
**
1503
01:48:34,999 --> 01:48:37,234
* Life ain't nothin'
but a big rat race *
1504
01:48:37,301 --> 01:48:39,971
**
1505
01:48:40,037 --> 01:48:41,939
* Life ain't nothin'
but a big rat race *
1506
01:48:42,006 --> 01:48:44,609
* Life is nothing
It's a nothing *
1507
01:48:44,676 --> 01:48:46,911
* Life is nothing
but a slap in the face *
1508
01:48:46,978 --> 01:48:49,513
* Life is nothing
It's a nothing *
1509
01:48:49,581 --> 01:48:51,683
* Life is nothing
but a fat rat race *
1510
01:48:51,749 --> 01:48:56,520
* What is life *
1511
01:48:56,588 --> 01:48:59,456
* What is life *
1512
01:48:59,523 --> 01:49:01,726
* A rat race *
* A rat race *
1513
01:49:01,793 --> 01:49:06,764
* What is life *
1514
01:49:06,831 --> 01:49:10,267
* What is life *
* A rat race *
1515
01:49:10,334 --> 01:49:13,270
* A rat... a rat race *
* A rat race *
1516
01:49:13,337 --> 01:49:16,574
* A rat-rat *
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1517
01:49:16,641 --> 01:49:18,976
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1518
01:49:19,043 --> 01:49:24,315
* Ooh, yeah, yeah
Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah *
1519
01:49:24,381 --> 01:49:26,884
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1520
01:49:26,951 --> 01:49:29,654
* Get a body out
in the rat, in the race *
1521
01:49:29,721 --> 01:49:32,156
* Get a body out
in the rat, in the race *
1522
01:49:32,223 --> 01:49:35,026
* Get a body out
in the rat, in the race *
1523
01:49:35,092 --> 01:49:37,662
**
1524
01:49:37,729 --> 01:49:39,731
* Get a body out
in the rat, in the race *
1525
01:49:39,797 --> 01:49:44,135
* Ooh, yeah, yeah
Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1526
01:49:44,201 --> 01:49:46,604
* Ooh, yeah, yeah *
1527
01:49:46,671 --> 01:49:49,506
* Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah *
1528
01:49:49,573 --> 01:49:51,575
* Ooh, yeah, yeah **
108693
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