All language subtitles for Down.to.Earth.1947.1080p.WEBRip.x264-RARBG

Let me alone. Let me alone.
I'm innocent, I tell you.

I had nothing to do with it.
She came down and did it.

Come on, out with it.

And no more of that goofy talk!

A 2-year-old
wouldn't believe

that fantastic story
you're handing out.

How did you know
there was gonna be a murder

five minutes before it happened?

Mr. Jordan?
Mr. Jordan, are you there?

Who you talking to?
What are you mumbling about?

We had trouble like this
with you once before, Corkle.

Yes, when you were
a fight manager,

handling that guy Pendleton.

Good old Joe.

The cleanest fighter
that ever lived.

Yeah, but when he died,

you told us
he came down to earth

and got inside
other people's bodies.

He did. He did!

And all that hooey

about that invisible
Mr. Jordan

who helped him do it.

It's true, I tell you.
It's true.

True, he did.
Mr. Jordan did do it.

Mr. Jordan,
where are you?

Look, Mr. Jordan...

Look, are you--

Wh-wh--

Mr. Jordan,
are you there?

Hey, Cap.

How long do we have
to wait around out here?

Take it easy, boys.
You'll get your story

as soon as we break
this guy down.

Now, get this, Corkle.

We don't let anybody

make monkeys
out of the police force,

so unless you want us

to really go to work
on you--

Oh, let me alone.
Let me alone.

I'll tell you everything!
But it won't make sense.

Come on. Come on!

Well, this fellow,
Danny Miller, had a show.

It was called
Swinging the Muses.

It was all about goddesses.

He made them hot goddesses,

and that's where
all the trouble began.

Somebody didn't like it.

And they were rehearsing
a number at the Elton Theater,

and she heard about it
and she came down.

Mr. Jordan did it.

"She"? Who's "she"?
What are you talking about?

That's what I'm trying
to tell you.

It was at a dress rehearsal
at the Elton Theater.

The Elton Theater!

All right, girls--
positions, everybody.

Okay, pal,
make it good this time.

You're not in this show
just because

you used to carry
my books to school.

Danny, I'll give you my all.
Or what's left of it.

Careful
of those costumes, girls.

All set, Phil. Give out
with the brass,

but don't drown out the lyrics.

I want to hear every word.

All right, Mr. Miller.

Let us go fellows,
and brighten it up.

* In section
2468-B *

* At your public library

* Books on Greek mythology *

* Are getting, getting dusty
On the shelves *

* It's nigh on 2000 years

* Since we started Our careers *

* No one digs us It appears *

* So we must
We must talk about ourselves *

* We're the Nine Muses
Nine Muses *

* And we live
On Mount Parnassus *

* We're the goddesses who

* Bring art and culture to you

* Terpsichore, Terpsichore

* Get with the news
Of the Muse *

* Da-da dip
Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure *

* Sure, sure, yep, yep

* Well, hello, Jack
What's new outside? *

* I just got back
From a chariot ride *

* I heard I've been elected to
Tell you what we Muses do *

* The jive is that
From way back when *

* Our kiss could inspire men

* To sing, to dance
To act, to paint *

* It's up to us
If they is or ain't *

* For instance
Take a chick like me *

* They call me Terpsichore

* I'm the goddess
Of song and dance *

* I put the ants
In the dancers' pants *

* The nine of us
In our careers *

* Kissed three million guys
In 2000 years *

* Here's an incompleted list

* Of the characters we kissed

* Puccini, Bellini
Antonio Rossini *

* Not to mention
Mr. Paganini *

* Tellini, MacSweeney
And Madame Tetrazzini *

* And the guy who invented
The skinless weenie *

* We kissed Schopenhauer

* Sigmund Freud
Socrates and Nietzsche *

* Thomas Edison
Robert Fulton, Alex Bell *

* And Don Ameche

* Benny Goodman
With those knockout lips *

* Kissed the kid with the drum
In the Spirit of '76 *

* Lombardo Brothers
Smith Brothers *

* Gimbel Brothers
Marx Brothers *

* Crosby Brothers
Dorsey Brothers *

* Ringling Brothers
Ritz Brothers *

* Haig and Haig
Daggett and Ramsdell *

* Park and Tilford
Lea and Perrins *

* Crosse and Blackwell
Liggett and Myers *

* Sears and Roebuck
Simon and Schuster *

* Hammacher Schlemmer

* Brother

* There's a half a million
Others *

* If you read your mythology

* You will learn
That the world would be *

* A washout * Yeah

* A big flop * Yeah

* A dull thud
And a whistle stop *

* If it wasn't for the kiss
Of the Muse **

Calliope, Clio!

Urania, Melpomene,
Euterpe, all of you...

Terpsichore, what's happened?

Tell us.
It's shocking.

Wait until you hear
what's happening on Earth.

A mortal, Daniel Miller,

is presenting
a musical play about us,

the Nine Muses.

What's disgraceful about that?

We've been glorified
in song and story

for centuries.

Shakespeare, Walt Whitman,
Robert Burns.

But this barbarian isn't
Shakespeare, Whitman, or Burns.

Why, he's portraying us
in a low and vulgar manner

on a public stage.

And according to him,

I'm nothing
but a man-chasing trollop.

Oh, no!
Oh, no!

Oh, yes.

And as for the rest of you,

he says you've kissed
over three million men.

Imagine that.

How vile.
That's scandalous.

We haven't kissed a man
in over 2000 years.

Except Apollo...
once.

And you should hear
the type of song he's using.

"For instance,
Take a chick like me

"They call me Terpsichore

"I'm the goddess
Of song and dance

I put the ants
In the dancer's pants"

Oh, no!

Oh, yes!

That could only come
from America!

Where else?

Why, their number one song
on the hit parade is:

"Who Hit Nelly in the Belly
With a Flounder?"

Oh!

Who does this savage think

inspired Michelangelo,
da Vinci, Rembrandt?

Do you know
who he's telling the world

we inspired?

The man who invented
the skinless weenie.

A frankfurter.

A frankfurter.
How ghastly!

Well, you can all stand around
and twiddle your thumbs

if you want to,

but I'm going to do something
about it.

The theater is my province.
It belongs to me.

I'll show this Miller imbecile
a thing or two.

I'll make him regret
the day he was born.

What can you possibly do?

He's down there,
and you're here.

There must be some way.
There must be.

I know. I know who can do it.
He's just the one to help me.

Who?

He did it before.
He can do it again.

Terpsichore,
what's happening to you?

Of course, that's it.
That's what I'm going to do.

He's the one.

Terpsichore,
where are you going?

Come back here.

Terpsichore!

We'll tell Zeus!

What I want to know is,
who do you think you are?

Popping up out of nowhere,

barging into us on
one of our busiest days?

I told you.
I'm Terpsichore.

I've come a long way,
and I've got to see him.

And I told you he has no time
for isolated cases.

But I'm not an isolated case.
Don't you understand?

No.
I'm Terpsichore,

the goddess of song and dance.

Ha!
That's preposterous.

She's nothing but a legend.

She never existed
except in Greek mythology.

If you don't take me right
to him, you won't exist. I'll--

My dear child, don't threaten.

What could you
possibly do to me?

We don't feel pain up here.

Here, here, here, you.
Come back here.

Escort 3082 reporting, sir.

12 passengers trapped
in a blizzard.

Territory?

Southern California.

Proceed.
Granite, Irwin.

Somerset, Nathaniel.

He's the multimillionaire, sir.

He wa the multimillionaire.

Oh, I forgot, sir.

They can't take it with them.

Get your hands off me,
you hear? Let me go.

Oh, Mr. Jordan,
could I speak to you?

Mr. Jordan,
I am awfully sorry.

I did everything in
my power to stop her.

Why should you try to stop her?

Why? Why--

You see, she's not like
the others.

She didn't come up through
the regular channels.

Indeed.

Oh, Mr. Jordan,

I see how terribly,
terribly busy you are,

and I do hope I'm not intruding.

That's quite all right.

Proceed.

Butler, Thomas.
Donahoe, Eleanor..

Supposing you tell me
what it is you want.

Mr. Jordan, she says
she's Terpsichore,

the Greek goddess.

Of course, you and I know
that's utterly absurd.

You and I don't know
any such thing.

The Muses have been

the spiritual personification
of the arts

since the days
of ancient Greece.

We do only our best,
Mr. Jordan.

But nobody who is anybody

has paid any attention to them

for over 2000 years.

Yes.

Messenger 7013,
we don't have calendars up here.

I've tried to explain that
to you.

It's habit, sir.
It's just habit.

I keep forgetting.
I am sorry, sir.

Well, my dear, how is everything

over on Mount Parnassus?

Oh, just wonderful.
Mr. Jordan.

I hated to leave.

It was only because
I thought it my duty

that I was able
to tear myself away.

You see,
I want to go down to Earth

and get into
a theatrical production.

Obviously you don't know
our business here.

We bring people up from Earth.

We don't take them down.

You shut up, you!

Uh, I mean...

Well, you see, Mr. Jordan,
I know you like to help people,

and this young man, Mr. Jordan,
the producer, is all mixed up.

He doesn't understand a goddess.

Now, if you would help me,
I could play the goddess,

then his show would succeed

and he'd make
a lot of money, you see?

Isn't that a good idea,
Mr. Jordan?

I must say, it's extremely
kind of you, my dear,

but I'm afraid we can't meddle
in the financial affairs

of every man on Earth.

We just don't have
the staff for it.

There, you see?

Oh, but I--

Mr. Jordan
has spoken.

But, Mr. Jordan,
it seems such a pity.

Oh, I'm certain
that this Mr. Miller

is a most deserving person,
and...

I only want to help.

Miller?
What is his given name?

Daniel.

Miller, Daniel.

If you'll just
wait here a moment.

Mr. Sloan,
contact the registrar's office

and ask them for everything
they have on Miller, Daniel.

Next time, young lady,

I hope you'll take my advice
for what it's worth.

Oh, you make me tired.

Oh, oh, oh!

I thought you couldn't
feel any pain.

I've got a memory, haven't I?

Mr. Jordan. On Miller, Daniel,

the official records
list him as an alternate.

An alternate?

Yes, sir, he's due here
on one of two separate dates,

the first quite soon,

the other
a number of years hence.

The choice depending upon
undetermined circumstances.

Ah, yes, yes, of course.
I remember the whole case now.

I believe, Mr. Sloan,

that our circumstances
have been determined for us.

Now, my dear,

you say your only
interest in this venture

is to make Daniel Miller's
musical a success?

Oh, yes, Mr. Jordan.

I have only
his welfare at heart.

Surely, Mr. Jordan,
you're not going to--

And you will stay on Earth
until your task is completed?

But of course.

And then return
to Mount Parnassus?

Oh, yes, Mr. Jordan.

Good. I will regard that
as an irrevocable promise.

You will consider this case
your special assignment.

Please start immediately.

Me? Oh, but Mr. Jordan,

I've been promising myself
a vacation for years...

I mean, our kind of years.

You will forego your vacation
for the present.

Take this young lady
down at once

and assist her
in every possible way.

Is that perfectly clear?

Yes, sir.

Oh, thank you, Mr. Jordan.
You're a darling.

Uh, do you mind

if I collect that another day?

Well, what are we waiting for?

Let's go.

Just a moment.

I'm the one
who says "let's go."

Let's go.

We sure get around, don't we?

One minute we're up there,

and then zip, we're
here in New York.

How do you do it?

I'll have to ask you not to pry
into trade secrets.

And another thing.
While I'm here,

where am I going to live?

Take the Peach Bloom suite
at the Waldorf Plaza.

I'm sure we can figure some way

to take care of the expense.

Sounds like fun.

Why are they all hurrying so,
these Americans?

Where are they going?

To see Mr. Jordan.

Yes, the more they hurry,
the sooner they'll get there.

Precisely.

7013, where are you?

Oh, there you are.

I wish you'd wait
and not go dashing about.

I'm not a race horse, you know.

Do you think you
ought to be here with me?

And why not?
I mean, those clothes.

They might start
wondering who I am

if I'm seen with you.

I have tried to make it clear
to you, Miss Terpsichore,

that you are the only one

who can see and hear
Mr. Jordan and me.

Oh, I forgot.

Looking for somebody, miss?

Oh. Oh, yes. Yes.

A rather silly-looking
gentleman.

He was wearing a sort of
messenger's uniform.

He was here a minute ago.

And he's here right now,

but some people cannot
get it into their heads

that I can't be seen or heard.

I don't see nobody, ma'am.

Thank you.

There!

I guess that'll show you,
you suspicious little--

little--

I didn't say it,
Mr. Jordan.

A real theater.

I haven't been on
a stage since...

429 B.C.

You're not on one yet.

Terpsichore!

Yes!

Oh, no, no! That's not
for you. That's--

What is it, Calliope?

Come on, kid, give out.

An airplane!

It crashed on the other
side of Parnassus.

Any occupants? Men?

I'll say.

Two beautiful aviators.

I don't care
if they're cross-eyed,

knock-kneed, bowlegged.

All I want to know is,

are they alive and healthy?

Is she supposed to be me?

Indubitably.

...throw them over
your shoulders

and bring 'em in.

It's simply disgraceful.

Ambrosia?

What I need
is a good slug of Scotch!

Now, that's not the way
I see Terpsichore.

You had it a minute ago.
What's the matter?

Why, it is a thousand times
worse than I ever imagined!

It is still too tame
for my money--

Too tame, did he say?

...trollop.
She's man-crazy.

That gentleman must be
Mr. Daniel Miller.

In the flesh, temporarily.

Well, 7013, this all has to be
corrected instantly.

You may be satisfied
with the way things are going,

but I'm not.

Oh, Mr. Jordan.

Now perhaps we'll get someplace.
What seems to be the trouble?

We've to get that jezebel
out of there and me in.

Well, what do you suggest?

Why not have her break a leg?

You could do that, couldn't you?

Don't you think
that's a bit drastic?

Mr. Jordan, how am I going
to get into the show?

You're the goddess
of song and dance,

aren't you?

Of course I am.

Well, what's stopping you?

What can I do?

Go ahead.

You'll think of something.

All right, Georgia,

let's go through your dance now.

Take your places, girls,
and brighten it up this time.

If I may be so bold, sir,

I tell you, you're
going to rue the day

you ever got mixed up
with that-- That Greek.

Here comes the angel.

Angel?

Mr. Jordan, really.

"Angel" is a theatrical term

for one who finances a show.

Oh...Oh!

Then he's--

Joe Manion,
the gambler. Yes.

Oh, dear, dear.

Then he's the one
who will kill Miller

if the show fails, won't he?

Definitely.

For the love of Pete,
who's that?

Hold it.

There are times, 7013,

when our work is quite pleasant.

I anticipate nothing
but catastrophe.

What's going on here?

She's magic.

It's fantastic!
That's Terpsichore.

What?

I need a goddess,

and a goddess comes down
out of nowhere.

I wonder who she is.

Well, Mr. Daniel Miller,
you've got two of us now.

Take your choice.

Two of us? Choice?

Sister, you're about
to lose some teeth.

Hey, now, take it easy.

Why, you cheap, chiselling
little hip-swinger!

I'd like to--

How dare you?

I ought to have you wiped
off the face of the Earth.

- What?
- Girls, wait a minute.

You throw this
character out of here

this very minute or I'm walking!

Go ahead and walk.

The general tone of the theater
will go up about 200 percent.

Well, are you gonna
throw her out or not?

You don't see me
doing it, do you?

Then I quit!

Take it easy, honey.

Now, wait a second, Danny,
don't go overboard.

You looked for months
for the right girl.

Yeah, and this is just
what I was looking for.

I've heard enough.

He's gone crazy or something!

No, no, no,
stick around.

But, Danny, can this girl sing?

She's got to know how to sing.

Let me handle this,
will you, Eddie?

Honey...please say yes.

Can you sing?

Of course I can sing.
And I can act too.

What is this, a contest?
I'm leaving.

And if you want
to know the truth,

I've been looking for an out.

Ever since I got
into this thing,

I knew it was a turkey.

Go change your clothes
and I'll give you your check.

That suits me fine!

Honey, I don't know who you are,

or where
you came from, but--

Mr. Manion,
is this what the show needed

or isn't it?

You're rolling the dice.

What key do you sing in?

Any key.

Phil, will you play
"Let's Stay Young Forever"?

Coming up.

* Let's stay young forever

* Let's never grow old

* Let every kiss we kiss
Be sweet and new *

* Eternally youthful
Throughout the years *

* Let's be children together

* Turn the tinsel to gold

* Let's always be naive

* And make believe
Tomorrow is never *

* There'll always be a song

* For those in love to sing

* But only for the hearts

* Of those who dream of spring

* How can our love
But stay warm? *

* You can turn a winter storm
To Maytime *

* Let's stay young forever

* No future or past

* Just living for the day
From day to day *

* And dreaming

* That love

* Will always

* Last *

Well, that's good enough for me.

Where'd you come from?
Where have you been hiding?

Oh, I just floated down
out of the clouds.

How'd you know this song?

I heard it from, uh,
from up there.

Oh, you've been hanging
around the balcony, huh?

How'd you ever learn
to sing and dance

the way you do?

Well, I sang
and danced like that

when I was 6 years old.

What's your name, honey?

Terpsichore.

I mean, that's
the part in the show.

Well, yes, I know,
but what's your name?

Kitty.

Hmm. Kitty.
That's a pretty name.

For a minute there,

I thought you were so excited

you couldn't remember
your own name.

Now, if you can
calm down a little,

I've got a few business details

to settle with you.

Take over, will you, Eddie?

All right, girls, line up.

By the way, honey,
who's your agent?

My what?

Agent. You've got
an agent, haven't you?

Who handles you?

Of course I have an agent.

Well, who is he?
His name is Max Corkle.

He is coming in
this very moment.

He'll be here in a moment.

Oh, Danny, am I lucky to get you
when you ain't busy.

I want you to meet
Rosebud Truelove,

the Human Pretzel.

She stands on a six-foot ladder,
does a full back bend

and laces her shoes
with her teeth.

Max, darling!

Isn't it funny?

We were just talking about him.

He's my agent.

I'm your agent?

That's what I said.
I'm her agent.

You'll never guess
what's happened, Max.

I came out and danced
in the chorus

just like you told me to
and it worked.

Oh, sure, sure, sure,

in--in the chorus,
just like I said.

Max, you rascal,
you've been wonderful

the way you have handled
me all these years.

Oh, yeah, all these years.

Let's see now,
how long has that been?

Max, you mean to say

you have had a girl like
this up your sleeve

and never even showed her to me?

Well, I'll tell you, Danny,
it's like this--

You see, I've got
such a big clientele.

Mr. Miller...

I'm waiting for my check.

Excuse me a moment.

Say, how many years

am I supposed
to stand around here?

Look, sweetheart,
I didn't know that Miss, uh--

You know, my old client.

You go back to my office
and practice your bends, huh?

Same old Max.
One of my favorite people.

Mine too.
When does he join us?

Mr. Corkle is an agent.

That's right.
We never get them.

You're on your own now, Kitty.

I'll be around if you need me.

Thanks for everything,
Mr.-- Mr. Corkle.

What are you thanking me for?
I ought to be thanking you.

Say, why'd you pick
me for your agent?

A friend recommended you, Max.

I'm glad he did.
So am I.

I'll have the contracts
ready in the morning, Max.

What's your last name, Kitty?

It...

Isn't it funny?

It's on the tip of my tongue.

Oh, mine too.

Say, what is this?

What are you two trying to hide?

Is there something in her past?

Oh, no, no, no, no!
But we had an agreement.

She don't want anybody
to know who she is.

Yes, yes. That's it.

Why?

It's on account
of all those cows.

Cows?

Yes, yes. My uncle in Texas,
he has millions of cows,

and you know how cows multiply.

And he doesn't want
the family name

associated with the theater.

That is it. Exactly.

Well, if that's all it is,

we'll just have to
give her a name.

I know, we'll
call her Pendleton.

Kitty Pendleton!

You'll be named after
the greatest fighter

that ever laid on a glove,
Joe Pendleton.

Came up outta no place,
just like you,

and wound up a champ,

and you're gonna wind up
a champ. Right?

Right.
Then it's all set.

She gets the regular salary
the part calls for.

The deal is on.

We sign the contracts
in the morning,

and thanks, Danny.

Well, so long, Miss...
Miss, uh--

Oh, of course!
So long, Miss Pendleton.

Be seeing you around.

Oh, Eddie, Eddie...
Yeah?

Say, Eddie,
about that client of mine,

give her a break, will you?
She's just got into town--

she's never been
in the chorus before.

Are you kidding?
She's not in the chorus.

She's playing the lead.

The--the--
the lead!

Yeah, sure.
She's Terpsichore.

Terpsichore!
The lead! The lead!

Uh-huh.

And I got 10 percent of her!
I never had a lead before.

I never had nothing
but acrobats,

pretzel benders, trained seals,

and now I got a star.
Me, Max Corkle. I've got a star!

And--and they're throwing me
out of my office.

They're wiping my name
off the window.

The L and the E are gone.
Now it spells "Cork."

I--I--I gotta go back.
I gotta go back.

They're throwing
the furniture out,

and I gotta go!

I'm still here!

I suppose you think it
was sort of bold o f me,

pushing my way in as I did.

I can't say you're
a shrinking violet.

Anyway, I am glad you did.

I promise you I'll
do all in my power

to see to it your show
is everything it should be.

Oh, I'm sure you will.
Here, sit down.

Well, I, uh...

I, uh...

Why do you keep
staring at me like that?

Staring? I wasn't aware of it.

Well, you've been looking at me
in an awfully strange way

ever since
I came into the theater.

Well, to tell you the truth,

I--I do feel something
strange about you.

Well, it's almost as if
you came from another world.

Well...

You were going to tell
me about the show.

Well, yes, I'd better give you
an idea of the story, and...

let you hear the songs, and...

I think that might be
a good idea.

Well, it, uh...

It's about a...

Don't you remember?

Oh, yes. Yes, I remember.

Uh, you see...

Eddie and I play a couple
of American aviators, and, uh...

Yes.

Well, we crash
on Mount Parnassus,

and there we meet
the Grecian goddess Terpsichore.

You know who she is, don't you?

Oh, I think so.

She's the most talented
of all the goddesses, isn't she?

I don't know.
I never met a goddess.

Well, the one in our show

is just an ordinary dame.

Anyway, this is the love song

I sing to you in the first act.

You see, I fall in love
with you...

in the show.

Uh, the love song, do you mind?

* They can't convince me

* That you're not a dream

* No matter how they try

* Not even when they say

* Doesn't she walk and talk
Like ordinary people do? *

* I reply, "Can you deny

* She's too lovely
To be true?" *

* They can't convince me

* That I might be wrong

* When I confide

* That you fell from a star

* For every time
I hold you in my arms *

* I'm more than sure

* They can't convince me

* For a dream is what you are

* You're very kind
And I thank you so much *

* Not at all, not at all

* I'm sincere
When I confide that you-- *

* Why should they believe you?

* Fell from a star

* Well, you know very well
That's absurd *

* For every time
I hold you in my arms-- *

* It seems to me
You're just pretending *

* And I'm more than sure

* Quite more than sure

* They can't convince me

* For a dream is what you are

* Oh, what a flatterer you are

...and I tell you,

you and everybody else
have it all wrong.

Imagining I'm this
and imagining I'm that.

No more nonsense.

Now, I want to know, once
and for all, who you really are.

All right, all right.

If you'll just let me alone,
I'll tell you.

Now we're getting someplace.

I'm Terpsichore,

the Grecian goddess
of song and dance.

Look, I didn't land on my head
when I was a kid.

Now, come on, honey.
Who are you?

I know it sounds ridiculous,
but that's who I am.

You're doing fine, Kitty,

but give me a little more
on that last line.

Hit "ridiculous."

Yes, Mr. Miller.

Okay, I'll give you the cue.

Look, I didn't land
on my head when I was a kid.

Now, come on, honey,
who are you?

I know it sounds ridiculous,

but that's who I am.

I'm Terpsichore,
the daughter of--

of--

Well, go on, Kitty.

Look, Mr. Miller,
it says here "Zeus,"

but it's all wrong.

Terpsichore's not
the daughter of Zeus.

My father--

I mean, her father was Dionysus.

No, no. Zeus.

That's the popular belief,

but I happen to know the facts.

It's Dionysus.

Please, I didn't put this show
together with thumbtacks.

It so happens I looked up
this particular item

in the encyclopedia.

I hate to disillusion you,
but the encyclopedia is wrong.

No kidding?

You know more than
the Encyclopaedia Britannica?

About things like this, yes.

Uh-huh.

And now that
we're on the subject,

you've got
a lot of things wrong.

For instance?

For instance, you've got me
drinking ambrosia.

Ambrosia's food,
nectar is the drink.

And your scenery...

Why, it doesn't bear
the faintest resemblance

to Mount Parnassus.

And as for
your costumes--

Look, Kitty, I haven't
time to fiddle around.

Do you mind?

I take you out of the chorus,
give you the lead,

and now you're trying
to run the whole show.

But I tell you, I knew
about things like this

before your great-great-great-
great grandfather was born!

Boy, you're really a character.

Here I am, working late
with you night after night,

and all you're doing
is giving me trouble.

Danny won't go for much of that.

No, of course not.

I think she must've
went to college.

You know how that'll
ruin anybody.

Come on.

Mr. Jordan...

May I ask the reason
for this unseemly haste?

I'm sorry, sir.
But it's about

that Kitty Terpsichore
Pendleton, sir.

She lied to you,
brazenly, without shame.

Oh?

Yes indeed, sir.

She's not helping
Danny Miller--

that is,
Miller, Daniel--

not in the least.

She's trying to change
his entire show

and fighting with him
like a wildcat

every inch of the way!

I know.

You do?

Then surely, sir,
you'll send her

right back where she came from.

Then, of course,

you can take your vacation.

Well, sir, to be
perfectly frank,

I did make reservations
at Paradise Lake,

and you know how difficult
they are to get these days.

That, 7013,

was an unwarranted assumption
of authority on your part.

As soon as you have
completed your assignment

with this young Muse,

you will report to my office
for disciplinary measures.

Mr. Jordan, you're not going
to assign me to Brooklyn again?

Precisely.

Oh, dear.

The nights are six months long
in Brooklyn.

What do morals
mean to me?

I'm a goddess.
I'm...

Oh, Danny, I just
can't say these lines.

Morals do mean
something to me--

That's all very charming,

but I'm not interested.

Just stick to the script.

I can't stand any more of this.

The whole idea of this scene

is cheap and vulgar,

and so is your show.

Why, suggesting that a goddess
or anybody else

would marry two men.

In the name of great Jupiter,

if you're going to present
the Nine Muses,

there must be a way of doing it

without such stupid lines,

embarrassing costumes,
and idiotic sets.

Take over, Eddie.

Come along with me.

Max, it doesn't look good.

And I thought I'd given up
handling fighters.

I could put her in the ring
with a tiger...

if I could find one
that'd take her on.

I want to tell you
something, Kitty.

I've gone overboard for you,

not only in the show,
but personally, too.

I'm not the kind of a guy

to do a lot of talking
about those things,

but you must know
that's how it is.

Well, you certainly have
a peculiar way of showing it.

Now, I'm pushing
all my personal feelings aside.

I've got to.
This show means too much to me.

What I've got to come up with

is a good, hot,
fast-moving musical

that'll pack them in.

Now, you seem to have
different ideas about it.

And what I'm trying to tell you
is the way you're doing it,

you're going to have
a failure, sure.

Let me worry about that.

Why, you lead people to believe
the show's about Terpsichore,

but it's not.

Why, they'll laugh at you.

She's not at all like
you've characterized her.

Look, I made this whole show up
out of thin air.

It's all a fairy tale,

and Terpsichore's any
cockeyed thing I say she is.

I'd be careful,
Mr. Daniel Miller.

She might hear you say that,
and she might not like it!

Oh, she might not like it, huh?

I suppose she might come down
out of the clouds

and slap me right
across the face.

She might...

if you continue to paint her
as a cheap, man-chasing trollop!

Now, get this, once and for all.

If I say
Terpsichore's a trollop,

she's a trollop!

Be on the stage in five minutes,
or you're out of the show.

Temper, temper, temper.

Oh, you!
What do you want?

A very interesting little scene.

Oh, go fry an egg.

My, you have come
down to earth...

and right into the gutter.

I asked you what you wanted,

and don't you have
other things to do?

Nothing that will give me
quite the satisfaction

of taking you back.

I presume

from this display
of ladylike restraint

that you're amenable
to the idea.

Well, you're presuming
all wrong.

I'm not going back at all.

I'm going to get
what I came down for if--

if I have to smash
everything in the theater

and him with it!

The only thing you've
smashed so far is yourself.

Yes...

Yes, I've been obvious, crude.

As a fishwife.

What are you up to now?

So the gentleman has gone
overboard for me, has he?

Perhaps I'll swim around
with him... a little bit.

None of that, now.

You dare to lie to him
and lead him on,

and I'll-- I'll
tell him just what--

You'll do no such thing.

You can't be seen
or heard, remember?

Oh, dear, dear.
That poor young man.

So I guess that
takes care of you.

Honey, Kitty, Danny's talking
about throwing you--

Who you talking to?

Oh, uh...
j--just the wind.

It's a silly little
habit of mine.

Oh, sure, sure.

Lots of us got
funny habits like that,

but don't let anybody catch you,

especially as it's
just standing still.

It ain't even blowing.
I'll remember that, Max.

Now, about you and Danny?

Don't worry about that.

I know, but I do!

That poor young man.

Psst!

I'm sorry, Danny, and Eddie.

I've thought it all over,

and now I know which one of us

is really running the show.

All right. We'll
skip the dialogue,

go right into the number.

Pick it up, will you, Phil?

Females...huh.

One head, but two faces.

* I want to marry
The two of you *

Get a load of that dame.

I think she's weird.

* Why not?

* Maybe you've got something
That he hasn't got *

What?

I'd like to tell her
But it's not in the plot.

* You're strong You're gentle *

* He's virile You're mental *

Thank y'all.

* You're a dreamer He thinks *

* You're handy. He--

Okay, sunshine.

I know all about
that sort of thing.

* Ha, ha, ha

* This marriage could make me
The happiest of creatures *

She must be the character
that started double features.

Hey, students,

what about the jurisprudence?

You mean the law?
Oh, the law. Why, that's a bore.

* There's a law against
Sitting on the grass *

* Against petting in the park

* Laws prohibiting
Beating wives *

* Thereby inhibiting
A million guys' lives *

* If anything's fun
The law's suppressed it *

* Tell me what you've done
And I'll get you arrested *

* Laws that Congress passes
To me don't matter a bit *

* They do not apply to Parnassus
Or the situation to wit *

She's in again
with that marriage kick.

What's the matter?
Don't you wanna do it?

No, but you talked us into it.

* Nevertheless, we state

* Just to keep
The record straight *

* This can't be legal
It sounds too good *

* This can't be legal
We're knocking on wood *

* I remember Uncle Harry
When he tried to marry *

* More than one

* Where did he wentin'?

* I send postcards
to San Quentin *

* Up here it's lawful
What's more, it's nice *

* Bet she keeps a drawer full
Of old shoes and rice *

* Let's buy a wedding gown
We agree upon *

* We'll pick it out

* I'll put it on

* This can't be legal

* Get out the ipso
Look up the facto, John *

Well, what do you think?

This must be that new thing
everybody's talking about.

You know, this might
work out all right

if you don't hang
around too much.

Funny, I was thinking
the same thing about you.

Looking after my interests?

Once a pal, always a pal.

Pardon me while I get
the knife out of my back.

I had to put it someplace.

It might get rusty.
You kidder.

Fellas...
Hmm?

Second chorus.

* I'll get two kisses
From two pairs of lips *

* Two little mink coats
In case one rips *

* I will have a man for lovin'
And a man to fix the oven too *

* One with endurance

* The other with plenty
Of life insurance *

* I'll have two mother-in-laws
Advising me *

* I'll lace Their gloves on *

* I'll referee

* If it does not work out
We can leave her flat *

* Double alimony
What's wrong with that? *

* This can't be legal

* It's murder
In the first degree *

What do you think now?
Oh, this is fine.

You with the oven,
and me with the lovin'.

Now, just a minute.
How about you with the oven?

No, no, you're
the man for the oven.

Now, don't move, you're
perfect as you are.

Ah, you moved!
Now, wait a minute.

Let's get back
to that oven routine.

Oh, you're in.

I hear you make a beautiful
upside-down cake.

Love to, but the blood
rushes to my head.

Well, never mind then.

Just some juice and coffee
in the morning.

Bring it up.
And what'll you be doing?

Oh, just dusting
and brushing things off.

Fellas!
Hmm?

Break it up. You're on.

* This can't be legitimate
It must be a trap *

* Let's try a bit of it

* Don't be a sap

* We can share and share alike

* In every little thing
The three of us do *

* That's altruistic
But aren't you too optimistic? *

* I'll stand beside you
Through storm and strife *

* For your protection
I'd lay down my life *

* Suppose I'm insulted
By a nasty man *

* I'll run and get him
As fast as I can *

* This can't be legal

* Refer to the case
Of Jones versus Fleegle *

* At night in my cozy little bed
I'll lie *

* And dream of both of you
Sleeping at the Y *

* What'd she say?

* At night in my cozy little bed
I'll lie *

* And dream of both of you
Sleeping at the Y *

* I want to marry
The two of you *

Get a load of that dame.

I think she's weird.

* If this is legal

* It couldn't happen
to four nicer guys **

* Let's never grow old

* Let every kiss we kiss
Be sweet and new *

* Eternally youthful
Throughout the years *

* Let's be children together

* Turn the tinsel to gold

* Let's always be naive

* And make believe
Tomorrow is never *

* There'll always be a song
For those in love to sing *

* But only for the hearts
Of those who dream of spring *

* How can our love
But stay warm? *

* You can turn a winter storm
To Maytime *

* Let's stay young forever

* No future or past

* Just living for the day
From day to day *

* And dreaming that love

* Will always

* Last *

I hate to disturb you, Danny,

but it's...
confidential.

Excuse me, Kitty.

It's about Kitty.

What about her?

She's still working on you

to change the show.

Now, you keep saying that,

but it doesn't make any sense.

Why would she want to do that?

Because she's the kind of a girl

who won't play unless
she has all the marbles.

Look, Eddie, we've had
only one fight in our lives,

when we were kids.

I don't want to have
another one with you...

because you licked me that time.

Let's just stay friends, huh?

I, uh, I think I'll
do a little work.

Feeling better, Eddie?

Oh, yes, yes.
I feel fine.

Well, we'll see
if we can't do something

to change all that.

Do you mind?

What brought you out here?

It worked, didn't it?

What worked?

Oh, I know what Eddie told you.

Oh, you do, huh?

Yes, and I'll tell you something

that may surprise you.

I think he's right.

Say, are we talking
about the same thing?

Of course.

I've been willful,
selfish, and stubborn.

And maybe a little ungrateful.

Well, if you're going
to break down like that,

I--I guess maybe I ought to.

I don't mind telling you

I've been kind of bullheaded
and stubborn myself.

Oh, but you have a right to be.

After all, what do I know
about the theater?

And as you said,

I'm just a little nobody
you took out of the chorus.

Oh, I don't know.

You--you've had a couple
of pretty good ideas.

Now you're just
being nice to me.

You know, I've been
giving a lot of thought

to what you've been saying
all along.

Maybe the public
won't like my taste.

Maybe I'm just a...

Broadway mug after all.

No, you're an artist.

Well, you could be
if you reached out.

Anyway, I just had a silly idea

they wouldn't like it your way.

Maybe you're right.

No.

Let's not keep talking
about the show.

Don't you ever think
of anything else?

Look at that moon.

It's like a million-dollar
gold piece.

Maybe I'm trying to make
the show too low-down.

What wonderful air.
It's like wine.

You know, audiences' tastes
might have changed.

Oh, Danny.

Excuse me, sir.

Oh.

Eddie?

Yeah.

I don't know what it is, but
he-- he just doesn't like me.

No, I-- I guess not.

Well, I guess I'll go in,

and let you figure it out.

Aren't you going to say
good night?

Good night.

Good night.

Come here, you.

* Hail, mortal

* Fallen from clouds
As a winged Icarus *

* On the Mount of Parnassus

* Terpsichore, Terpsichore

* Look once more
On the daughters of Dionysus *

* Whose kiss inspired
The beauty of the world *

Well, what do you think, Danny?

Oh, I don't know.

We didn't even get enough
applause to take bows.

Half a dozen of them walked
out during the first act.

Well, you can't tell, Danny.

They might've been people
who had appointments,

like doctors or something.

Thanks, Eddie.

My dear, magnificent.
Magnificent.

Sheer poetry,

poetry of movement.

Why, every scene a painting.

My dear,
I'm Mrs. Fenimore-Hume,

President of the Pure Art Forum.

I wonder if you would come

to a little intimate gathering
at my house,

a sort of a late supper.

I'd be delighted.

Danny, do you mind if I go?

No, go ahead.
Sounds like fun.

I'll only be a minute.

Brother, if those
longhairs go for it,

you're dead.

Hello, Mr. Manion.
Have a good seat?

Yeah, I saw
and heard everything.

This was just
a tryout, Mr. Manion.

Don't judge by this.

Remember, our understanding
was New York.

That's right.
Nobody's rushing you.

Thanks very much.

The manager says they're tearing
it to shreds in the lobby.

What'll we do, post a notice?

No, no, I just want
a little time to think.

Have everybody on-stage
tomorrow morning at 10:00.

I'm going for a walk.

Can I...
drive you anyplace, Danny?

No thanks. Not tonight.

And that guy never looked
at a dame before in his life!

Good morning.
Morning.

Good morning, everybody.

Good morning.
Good morning.

Morning, Miss Pendleton.

Good morning, everybody.

What's wrong with you people?
Why is everybody so glum?

Haven't you read the notices?

No. Why?

She hasn't read the notices.

"Swinging the Muses,
although lovely in spots,

"resembles a Bach festival

"and should've been presented
at Symphony Hall

"where the audience
is at least forewarned

so that they can sleep
through the performance."

And listen to this.

"As for myself, I can take about
20 minutes of Greek classic,

but two hours
would get anybody down."

Well... how dare they?

What do they know of the arts?

I see it as a great triumph.

We've given something beautiful
to the theater.

Yeah, our blood.

But there's a line
at the box office

all the way down the street.

They're the people
who bought tickets in advance

asking for their money back.

We had a great show

till you butted in and made
it so darned highbrow.

Highbrow?

Ha! Ha, ha, ha.

I was warned about your country.

How can you mix art with jive
and baseball and hot dogs?

Huh! Get her.

The show busts,

so she don't live here anymore.

Hold it.

Hold it, everybody.
This'll get us no place.

Now, look, kids, when I got
all of you into this thing,

I was sure we had
every chance for a smash.

I knew what I wanted then,
and I know what I want now.

We're going to go back
to the show exactly as it was

before I got side-tracked.

We're going to throw all
this phony art overboard

and stay out of town rehearsing

until we get it
whipped into shape.

It's gonna be everything
it started out to be.

A show for people who like jive
and baseball and hot dogs.

Now, one more thing.

From now on, there's going to be
nobody around here

acting like a goddess.

I'm the boss.
What I say goes.

Now, if there's anybody
who doesn't like it that way,

now's the time
for them to say so.

Well?

Mr. Miller,
the show is all yours.

All right, that's that.
Before I look anyplace else,

I'm gonna try every
one of you kids for the lead.

Hello, Kitty.

Oh, Mr. Jordan.

You're just the one
I want to see.

So I imagined.

I want to go back, right away.

Oh, surely you don't
want to leave now,

just when he needs you most?

I do. I want
to leave at once.

But you told me
you wanted to help him.

That was my sole reason
for letting you come down.

Well, I lied
to you, Mr. Jordan.

I wasn't interested in him,

not for a second.

I came down for purely
selfish reasons.

I wanted to change the show,

and that's all
I was interested in.

I know.

And still you let me go ahead?

I had a feeling
it'd work out all right.

But it hasn't.

It's worked out all wrong,

and I don't intend

to tolerate his
arrogance any longer.

I don't think you'll go back,
not right now.

Mr. Jordan...

you underestimate my emotions.

I told you I hate the man.

I loathe him.

I'm not sure of that either.

You see, you're not
in possession of all the facts.

What facts?

Well, if you'll allow me,

I'd like to take you
back in time a few months.

There's something quite
important that happened then

that I think
you should know about.

What happened?

You'll see.

He's on almost every number
but the right one.

Thirteen will win.
Why don't you tell him?

Well, this is quite a while ago.

I wasn't even here.

I'll tell him, then.

He can't see or hear you.

Besides, you haven't
met him yet.

Oh.

Thirteen.

Just as you predicted.

I'm not the only one who knew.

The wheel is crooked.

What is it?
What's the matter?

They thought Danny came in
with some regular patrons,

and they extended him credit.

He's lost $20,000 and can't pay.

Well, I don't understand

what any of this
had to do with me.

Come along, you'll see.

Would you like to hear
what they're saying?

Yes, I would.

Why did you keep on playing
when you ran out of money?

Well, I thought I might win.

Well, you didn't.

I'd like to talk to you alone,
Mr. Manion.

Spike, get going.

Just a minute. We're
supposed to be partners.

I have a half-interest
in this little palace.

I said, get going.

Okay, let's have it.

Well, it's pretty simple.

I'm Daniel Miller.

I had to get hold of $100,000
right away.

What for?
To put on a show.

I've had a couple of failures,

and the boys with the money
kind of ran out on me,

but I still have plenty
of confidence in the show

and in myself.
If you could come--

That's very touching,

but unless I have my 20,000
by tomorrow morning...

You'll have one of your...
gorillas bump me off.

You've been seeing
too many movies.

Oh, I think I know how
you operate, Mr. Manion.

I figured all that out
before I came up here.

Oh, you did?

And I also figured out
if I didn't win,

you'd put up the $100,000
for a piece of the show.

Now, where did you ever
get an idea like that?

Because you're a gambler.

You lose $100,000
on the turn of a card.

Turning cards is my business.

Goodbye, Mr. Miller.

Go out that door.

Of course, Mr. Manion,

if anything
should happen to me now,

with all those witnesses
out there,

you'd be a cinch
for the electric chair.

Go on.

On the other hand,
you back the show,

and I'll guarantee
it with a note.

You haven't any money.
What good is your note?

Oh, this one's very good...
it's a suicide note.

A suicide note?

That's right.
If the show fails,

you can have one of your...
boys take care of me.

Plant the note in my own
handwriting on my body,

you're in the clear
with the police.

Doesn't that appeal
to your gambler's instinct?

So you want to stake your
life against my money?

Is that it?

That's the idea.

At least you know
I'll work pretty hard

to put the show over.

All right. I'll play
with those chips.

Sit down...

and start writing.

"No one is responsible...

"for my death but myself.

I've taken my own life
because..."

And so you see, Kitty,

that's the reason
I've concerned myself

with this young man.

I've always felt that he had
a great deal to offer,

both to life and to the theater.

It'd be a pity
to take him away too soon.

Yes.

The choice is up to you, Kitty.

With you in the New York
opening, it can't fail.

But what'll I do?

Will he take me back now?

I'm quite sure
it's worth trying.

Good luck, my dear.

And do it his way this time.

I'm the daughter of Zeus.

I'm sorry, honey.
It's just too much for you.

Anyone else, Eddie?

Yes.

One more.

What do you want?

I want to come back.

You're too late.

Oh, Danny, wait,
please. Danny...

You walked out.
Now you can stay out.

But you haven't
found anyone else.

You need me.

Like a hole in the head.

Oh, Danny, you've got
to listen to me.

What are you following me for?

What are you after now?

You still...
in love with me?

I didn't realize what
any of this meant to you,

but now I do,

and all I want to do is help.

I'll do anything,
anything you say.

It's unimportant
what you think of me.

Do it for yourself,
for the show.

Please, Danny.

You say you'll do
anything I say?

Yes, Danny.

You'll sing my way?
Yes, Danny.

Dance my way?
Yes, Danny.

Wear anything
I want you to wear?

Yes, Danny.

All right.

You open in New York
Thursday night.

They say it received bad notices
in Philadelphia.

But Jack, I understand
they changed it.

I heard good reports.

It was rumored some sort of
trouble with the leading lady.

I adore musicals.
I'm so tired of thinking.

Darling, you've lost
weight, haven't you,

or is that a new dress?

Good luck,
Mr. Miller.

Best of luck, boss.

Hope you have a smash, Danny.

Thanks, girls.
Thanks for staying with it.

I love all of you.

Honey, see you a minute?
It's Danny.

Hello, Danny.
I hope it's wonderful.

Well, if you come through
like you did in dress rehearsal,

we'll have 'em
tossing their wives in the air.

I'll do my very best, Danny.
I know you will.

Curtain!
Curtain!

Okay.
Luck again, honey.

Good luck, Danny.

You too.

Gee, I'm scared stiff.

Boy, I thought I had butterflies

in my stomach before,

but now they're wearing
roller skates.

Hey, don't bother her, Max,
she's on soon.

Yeah, yeah.
I know. I know.

Who is it?

It's Max, honey.

Come in.

This is Mr. Kelly.
He's a detective.

A detective?

You owe $1,800 to
the Waldorf Plaza Hotel, lady.

You had a pretty
expensive suite.

You skipped to Philadelphia
and we haven't seen a dime.

Well, I--I--I...

Tell him about
your uncle in Texas,

the rich one with all the cows.

Don't give me those cows, lady.

None of your stories check.

The switchboard operator
says you got no phone calls.

The desk says
you got no letters.

You've got no boyfriends,

and you've got no relatives.

There's something
phony about you.

Come on, now, who are you?

Where did you come from?

Well, I have to go on
in a few minutes.

You have a lot to explain,

or you'll be on your way
to jail in a few minutes.

Come on, now, out with it.

Well, a gentleman friend told me
to take the Peach Bloom suite.

He-- He said everything
would be taken care of.

Who? What's his name?

Well, he...has no name.

He-- He's a messenger,
Number 7013.

Yeah? What kind of messenger,
Western Union?

Look, honey, He's got
to know the truth.

You got to tell us both
who you are,

or he won't let you
go on with the show.

All right. All right.

I don't know
how I can make you believe it,

but I'm Terpsichore,
the Grecian goddess,

and I came down
from Mt. Parnassus to, to...

You know, on opening nights,
people get excited,

and they say a lot
of crazy things.

But I'm not saying crazy things.

It's all true.

How could I suddenly
come out of no place

and pick you for my agent?

How could I sing
and dance like I do,

and then nobody ever
heard of me?

Now, look, sweetheart,

I'm just like your father.

You'd better
get hold of yourself.

I've heard you talking to people
when nobody was around.

Of course, I understand,

but some people don't.

I'm one of them.

Okay, let's go.

Let me alone!
I have to go on!

Having trouble, Kitty?

I certainly am having trouble.

Thank goodness you're here.

Is there somebody with us?

Yes. Now everything
will be taken care of.

What'll I do?

What'll I tell them,
Mr. Jordan?

Mr. Jordan! He's here?
You know him?

Of course.

Holy jumping--
Then that explains

how all these goofy
things've been happening!

Mr. Jordan is
here again.

Uh, hello, Mr. Jordan.
How are you?

Eh, uh...

She can see him, But I can't.

Oh, I see. That
explains everything.

Well, sure it does!

If she's a friend
of Mr. Jordan's,

then she's a goddess
or whatever she says she is.

Ain't that right,
Mr. Jordan?

Hey, what's going on
around here?

Oh, look, you don't know
who Mr. Jordan is.

He was a friend
of Joe's--

that fighter I handled,
Joe Pendleton.

Well, when Joe died,

Mr. Jordan brought him
down to Earth

and put him inside
other people's bodies.

I heard from Joe
last week, Mr. Jordan.

He-- He's in--
he's in Sacramento.

He--He's using
Murdock's body.

He got a couple of kids.
He's doing fine.

Doing fine?
You said he died.

He did!

He was killed
in an airplane crash,

and then he was cremated.

You're nuttier than a fruitcake,

the two of you.

What do you think
you're pulling?

You're coming with me,
and you are too.

Ask Mr. Kelly

if he'll accept payment
for the hotel bill.

Mr. Jordan wants
to know if you'll--

if you'll accept money.

Oh, he does, huh?
It's 1,800 bucks.

Has Mr. Jordan got it
in his pocket?

Or maybe he ain't got pockets.

I only got 90 bucks.

Tell Max to answer
the telephone.

Max, Mr. Jordan says
to answer the phone.

The phone, it ain't ringing.

H--H--Hello?
Yeah, this is Corkle.

Oh, hello, Sam.
It's Sam Hooper, the bookie.

How'd he know I was here?

What, Sam? Pacific Handicap?

No, I didn't call you.

No. No, I don't want
to place a bet, Sam.

Wait a minute.

Tell him to bet his $90
on Chickie's Choice.

Mr. Jordan says

to bet your $90
on Chickie's Choice.

Hold it. Chickie's Choice?

Oh, look, Mr. Jordan,
please, look,

Chickie's Choice
is a rank outsider.

Look, a 20-to-one shot.
Look, a dog.

Go on, do as he says.

Oh, all right.

Hello, Sam?

90 bucks on the nose,
Chickie's Choice.

Yeah.

Do you want to place a bet,
Mr. Kelly?

The race'll be on
in a few minutes,

California time.

I'm not taking tips

from a guy that ain't even here.

That's it, Sam.

My last 90 bucks,
Chickie's Choice.

Yeah.

Well, if we win,
there's your 1,800 bucks.

Yeah, that's right,
Mr. Jordan...

exactly 1,800 bucks.

Kitty, turn on the radio.

There they go!

It's Donny Dear
going to the front,

Jackter is second,
Count Saffron is third,

Glory Girl, fourth,
Montague II is fifth,

Pancho, sixth,
and Waterboy on the outside.

Where's Chickie's Choice?

And at the first turn
it's Donny Dear

still in front by two lengths!

Waterboy on the outside
is second by a head--

Mr. Jordan,
don't you think

you ought to have me
put it on Donny Dear?

Pancho, Glory Girl,
and Montague II.

Into the back stretch
it's Donny Dear

still in the lead
by two lengths!

Count Saffron is second
by one length,

Waterboy is third
by three-quarters of a length,

Montague II, fourth--

Mr. Jordan, are you sure
Chickie's Choice is in the race?

Jackter is sixth
by a length and a half,

and Chickie's Choice is next
and moving up steadily!

Did you hear him?
He said Chickie's Choice!

it's Donny Dear in front
by one length,

Count Saffron is second
by a length and a half,

and now Chickie's Choice
is moving up!

Fourth!
Come on, sweetheart.

Count Saffron is second
by a head,

Waterboy is third
by three-quarters of a length,

and Chickie's Choice
is fourth on the outside.

Into the stretch,

it's Donny Dear in front
by a length and a half,

and coming up fast
is Chickie's Choice!

Now it's Chickie's Choice
challenging Donny Dear!

It's Donny Dear in front!
Chickie's Choice is second!

They're head and head--

Come on, come on, please!

Come on, you dog!

and Donny Dear wins by a nose!

I should've known.

Mr. Jordan, how could you
do this thing to me?

No, no, wait. Sorry!
My mistake.

It's the other way around.

The winner is Chickie's Choice!

Uh, Mr. Jordan,

would you like to go
to the races with me

Saturday afternoon?

* For instance
Take a chick like me *

* They call me Terpsichore

* I'm the goddess
Of song and dance *

* I put the ants
In the dancers' pants... *

* They can't convince me

* That you're not a dream

* No matter how they try

* Not even when they say

* "Doesn't she walk and talk
Like ordinary people do?" *

* I reply, "Can you deny

* She's too lovely
To be true?" **

How do you like me, Kelly?

I get 10 percent of a goddess.

Mr. Manion,
this can't wait.

* Hurray! Hurray! Hurray!

* Hurray! Hurray! Hurray!

* Welcome home
Hurray! Hurray! Hurray! **

* People have more fun
Than anyone *

* Than anyone

* I am simply enchanted
At what folks take for granted *

* They ignore what's before
Their very nose *

* Like what? Like what?
Like what? Like what? *

* Do you stop to think
When you drink *

* How the soda comes up
From the straw? *

* Whoever saw
Such a miracle before? *

* People have more fun

* Than anyone

* Than anyone

* Push a button
There's sunlight *

* Draw the blind
And there's moonlight *

* Strike a match and you hatch
A star that glows *

* Turn the faucet on
And you have rain *

* Making babbling brooks
Come down your drain *

* Twist a dial
And what do you hear? *

* Bob Hope

* Every night, Rinso white
Happy little washday soap *

* People have more fun

* Than anyone

* Right

* And especially

* When a he and she

* Get together
When day is done *

* Then people

* Have more fun

* Than anyone

* Wait for the wagon

* Wait for the wagon

* Wait for the wagon
And we'll all take a... *

* People

* Have more

* Fun!

* People have more fun

* Right!

* Than anyone *

Well, kids, it looks like
we're in the money.

And if you don't believe it,
listen to this:

The Scott-Harringtons--

They're Park Avenue, and big,

are throwing a big party
for the whole troupe.

So look your prettiest.

The address is over
on the call board,

and I'll see you there.

You're going with me.
I want to show you off.

Thanks, Danny.

Oh, this is the happiest
night of my life.

You really killed them, baby.

I'm glad, Danny.
I'm happy for you.

Didn't hurt too much, did it?

I had a wonderful time.

Kitty, I want to
tell you that-- that--

Come here with me.

Kitty, darling,
I want to tell you that...

That's what I was trying to say.

I wanted to hold you like that
every time I've been near you.

Even when you slapped me
in the face.

I promise
I'll never do it again.

I'm sorry, Kitty.
I have bad news for you.

I'm afraid you have to go back.

I'll be waiting for you.

What is it?

What's the matter?

Oh, nothing, Danny.

Nothing.

Why are you staring at me
like that?

Oh, Danny,
if anything should happen,

if...

if we should lose each other...

Lose each other?

No matter how hard it is
for you to understand,

please believe one thing.

I love you now,
and I'll love you always.

Kitty, darling, what is it
you're trying to tell me?

I can't explain it to you,
Danny.

I...I have to leave you now.

Leave me?

Yes, there's...something...
someone I--

Well, Kitty, what is it?

Please trust me,
and wait for me.

I'll be back...if I can.

If I can at all...
I'll be at the party.

Sweetheart, you were the tops,
and oh, what an idea I got.

Look, get those
other eight dames

to come down here.

I'll book you on a personal
appearance tour--

"The Nine Original Muses."

Take me out of here, Max.

Ain't you gonna change?

Ain't you going to
the party, honey?

Please, Max.

Is there anything wrong
with you and Danny?

Please, just let me think.

Sure.

You did the only thing
you could do, Kitty.

No, I shouldn't have done it.

I never should have left him.

Well, let's tell the driver
to turn back.

What am I going to do?

What am I going to do?

I don't know, honey.
We can't go both ways.

I'm sorry, Kitty.
We're leaving tonight.

Tonight?

Oh, but I don't understand.

You brought me
here, and you--

No, no, no, honey.
You brought me, remember?

Not you, Max.

I can't go. Not now.
Nothing's settled,

and Manion, what'll he do

if I step out of the show
after one night?

Step out of the show?
What are you talking about?

I told you, Max,

I'm not talking to you.

Oh...

Oh!

You mean-- You mean
Mr. Jordan is here?

Yes, he's sitting
right next to you.

Oh.

Hello, Mr. Jordan.

I'm pleased to see you again.

Thank you, Max.

Kitty, tell the driver
to go to Pier 7, East River.

We haven't much time.

Pier 7, East River.

The East River?

What are we going there for?

Mr. Jordan's orders.

Oh. I see.

I'm sorry, Mr. Jordan.
I-- I didn't mean to butt in.

Keep the change.
Thank you.

Tell Max to go for
the police, instantly.

Max, Mr. Jordan says

you're to go
for the police, immediately.

For the police?
Please, Max, hurry.

Look.

Well, here he comes now.

Manion.

Yes.

But who? Why?

It was Spike, his partner.

He's the sole owner of
the gambling establishment now,

at least until the police
catch up with him.

How dreadful.

Perhaps, but if the show
had failed,

he would've murdered
Danny Miller one hour ago.

So you see, Kitty,
that's why it was necessary

for you to stay until now.

It isn't necessary any longer.

But it is.
It is, because...

because it's different now.

You saved Danny's life.

That's all we had for you to do.

I don't care. I don't care!

I love him, and...
and I want to stay.

It wasn't meant to be, Kitty.

Your mission is accomplished,
and now you must return.

That's what we agreed upon.

But I don't want it that way
anymore.

Please, Mr. Jordan. Please.

I don't want to be a goddess.
I just want to be a human being.

I want to get married
and have a home

and be with Danny...always.

Listen.

We must go now, my dear.

No...

I'm not going. I'm not going!

Don't fight it, Terpsichore.

No. No!

I'm Kitty Pendleton!

I'm going back to Danny!
I'm going back!

Oh, Danny...

Danny, I've come back.

He tried to take me away, but...

but I've come back to you.

Oh, Danny,
don't be angry with me.

Don't you understand?
I've come back.

I'm never going
to leave you again.

Ah, champagne?

Don't spread this around, girls,

but this is the first time
I ever tasted champagne--

Eddie, what's
the matter with Danny?

Why doesn't he talk to me?

Ah...

Eddie... Eddie!

It's no use.

They can't see or hear you.

Please, Mr. Jordan.

Please let him hear me.

Please let him see me.

Just for one moment.

It has to be this way.

You can't change destiny.

Mr. Jordan...
I want to cry, but I can't.

There are no tears.

Mr. Jordan,
at least let me cry.

You can't anymore.

Tears are only for mortals.

It's an advantage
they have over us.

Come, Terpsichore.

Yes, Mr. Jordan.

Danny...

What's the matter, kid?

You've got a smash hit,

and you're moping around
like a guy that...

It's Kitty's.
She's here.

No.

She was here...

but she's gone.

What're you talking about?
I don't understand.

Neither did I,

but now I'm beginning
to understand many things.

Don't look for her, Eddie.
You won't find her.

But, Danny, this is her coat.

She must be here.

She tried to tell me
right after the show.

Tried to tell you what?

I don't know.

I sometimes wonder
if she ever was real.

I only know
she came out of nowhere and...

vanished the same way.

But the guy was invisible!

How could he tell you

there was gonna be a murder?

Mr. Jordan told her,
and she told me.

Kitty Pendleton was
at the scene of the murder,

and hasn't been seen since!

Where is she now?

Mr. Jordan
took her back.

Oh, now I suppose

she's living up in the clouds

in a civilization

that never even existed!

That's right.
That's just where she is.

Looks like we'll have
to cart this guy off

to the nut factory.

Wait a minute.
I'm innocent, I tell you.

I never saw the girl
before that first day.

She came in

and flung her arms
around my neck

and she said, "Max, darling,

"just think, they took me
out of the chorus

"and gave me the lead.

"I'm going to play Terpsichore,

and I want you
to be my agent."

Wait! Do you expect us
to believe

that a dame just bounced in
out of no place?

Max, darling!

Just think, they took me
out of the chorus

and gave me the lead!

I'm going to play Terpsichore,

and I want you to be my agent.

I must be leaving you now,
Terpsichore.

What's going to happen,
Mr. Jordan,

now that I've lost him?

You haven't.

Would you like me to show you?

I wouldn't do this for
anyone else, Terpsichore,

but I think you've earned it.

Come.

Where are we going?

Merely a few years
into the future.

You see, my dear,
how simple it is?

Here we are
witnessing the future.

And there I am,
still on the job.

Look.

Danny...

But he seems
just about the same.

The spirit never
really ages, my dear.

In all these years,

he's never had a failure.

There's a legend
about him on Broadway.

They say he was
kissed by the Muse.

Will he look for me?
Will he find me?

Will he remember me?

Well, let's wait and see.

Miller, Daniel...

Why...

Why, it's--it's...

Yes.

Thank you, Mr. Jordan.