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I am now
utterly convinced
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00:00:33,951 --> 00:00:36,245
that on Judgment Day,
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00:00:36,328 --> 00:00:38,831
the Lord Jesus
will ask one question
and only one question.
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00:00:43,461 --> 00:00:45,713
Did you believe
that I loved you?
5
00:03:41,388 --> 00:03:42,389
Try it again.
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00:03:46,936 --> 00:03:48,938
J Everybody each
and all
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00:03:49,021 --> 00:03:52,858
We're going
to die eventually
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00:03:55,319 --> 00:03:59,114
0 It's no more
or less our fault' .0
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00:03:59,198 --> 00:04:02,284
J� As it is our destiny J�
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00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:22,304
J� When my body
lies in the ruins J�
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00:04:22,388 --> 00:04:26,433
J3 Of the lies
that nearly ruined me J3
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00:04:42,116 --> 00:04:44,201
We are here
with Rich Mullins,
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00:04:44,285 --> 00:04:47,121
one of contemporary
Christian music's
biggest stars.
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00:04:47,204 --> 00:04:48,872
Rich, welcome to the show.
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00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:51,333
Rich, we know
of your various hits.
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00:04:51,417 --> 00:04:54,336
Awesome God, Sing Your Praise
of the Lord -and- Elijah,
among others.
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00:04:54,420 --> 00:04:56,797
-You've been at the top
of the COM charts,-
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00:04:56,839 --> 00:04:59,174
had a number
of Dove Award nominations,
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00:04:59,258 --> 00:05:00,634
but I want to talk
a little bit
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00:05:00,718 --> 00:05:02,636
about the man
behind the music
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00:05:02,678 --> 00:05:04,555
so if you don't mind
will you tell us
a little bit
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00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:07,725
about how you came
to faith in Christ?
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00:05:07,808 --> 00:05:09,059
Well, Randy, I'm not
a Christian
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00:05:09,143 --> 00:05:10,894
because of a song
I heard
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00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:12,730
or a book I read,
as much as I like
to read.
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00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:16,066
Uh, I came to experience
the realness of Christ
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00:05:16,150 --> 00:05:18,569
through the people
in his church.
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00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:20,738
I'm a Christian,
not because
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00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:23,907
somebody explained the nuts
and bolts of Christianity
to me but
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00:05:23,991 --> 00:05:26,702
because people
were willing to be
the nuts and bolts.
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00:05:34,918 --> 00:05:36,712
Come on,
let's go!
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00:05:49,933 --> 00:05:51,643
I guess you could say
my story began
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00:05:51,727 --> 00:05:53,562
in a small town
in Indiana.
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00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:59,777
My dad was a farmer
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00:05:59,860 --> 00:06:03,447
and easily,
easily the hardest
working man that I know.
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00:06:03,530 --> 00:06:05,657
Like most boys,
I grew up
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00:06:05,741 --> 00:06:08,619
wanting to be
exactly like him,
exactly like my dad.
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00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:11,789
But I discovered
at a pretty early age,
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00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:14,041
time and time again that
40
00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:16,085
I wasn't really cut
out to be a farmer.
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00:06:28,389 --> 00:06:29,723
Hold the light.
42
00:06:29,765 --> 00:06:31,266
What's wrong
with it, Dad?
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00:06:31,350 --> 00:06:33,060
Damn light, son!
44
00:06:40,692 --> 00:06:43,737
It's the pistons.
45
00:06:43,779 --> 00:06:45,155
What did you
fill it with?
46
00:06:45,239 --> 00:06:47,825
Gasoline.
Like you said.
47
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:49,576
Like I said?
48
00:06:49,660 --> 00:06:51,286
Not like I said,
'cause I didn't say
49
00:06:51,370 --> 00:06:53,956
I didn't say
nothing about gasoline.
50
00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:57,334
Of all
the damn fool things.
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00:06:57,418 --> 00:06:58,585
Lean over here, boy.
Come here.
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00:06:58,627 --> 00:07:01,797
What's that say?
53
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:03,340
Speak up, Wayne!
What's it say?
54
00:07:03,424 --> 00:07:04,591
-Diesel.-
55
00:07:04,675 --> 00:07:09,012
That's right.
Diesel.
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00:07:09,096 --> 00:07:12,850
Because you can't put
gasoline in the tractor, son.
57
00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:13,934
I'm sorry, Dad.
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00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:17,354
Well, sorry
isn't going
to fix this, boy.
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00:07:17,438 --> 00:07:18,772
Damn!
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00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:39,126
My mom and dad
raised five of us kids
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00:07:39,168 --> 00:07:43,797
and, you know,
most of the time
money was pretty scarce.
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00:07:43,839 --> 00:07:46,216
And when I was little,
my baby brother
passed a way.
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00:07:46,300 --> 00:07:49,470
And that was
often hard for them.
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00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:51,763
Even as a boy,
I wanted to help.
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00:07:56,059 --> 00:07:59,730
But I couldn't.
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00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:01,857
Why didn't you tell me
you got the tractor
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00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:05,235
stuck in the field
this morning?
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00:08:05,319 --> 00:08:06,528
Speak up, Do
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00:08:06,612 --> 00:08:08,697
I thought
you'd be mad.
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00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:12,993
I just don't understand
why everything you touch
ends up busted.
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00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:45,234
I wish you'd be
more gentle with him.
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00:08:45,317 --> 00:08:49,363
More gentle?
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00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:51,281
That's the last
thing to be.
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00:08:51,365 --> 00:08:53,534
He needs
to toughen up,
that's what.
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00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:55,702
He's got his damn
head in the clouds.
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00:08:55,744 --> 00:08:57,871
He needs to know
you love him.
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00:08:57,955 --> 00:09:00,207
That boy needs to stay
away from the tractor.
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00:09:00,249 --> 00:09:03,043
Last week,
it was the engine.
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00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:04,545
Today he got not one,
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00:09:04,628 --> 00:09:06,964
but four wheels
stuck in holes.
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00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:09,716
John, he's
just trying--
Four, Neva.
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00:09:09,758 --> 00:09:13,387
Four. The repairs
cost 300 dollars,
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00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:15,639
not to mention
the lost time
on the farm.
84
00:09:15,722 --> 00:09:18,308
Ain't going
to be worried
aboutlove
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00:09:18,392 --> 00:09:20,269
if he is going
hungry, will he?
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00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:32,656
He's our oldest boy, Neva.
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00:09:32,739 --> 00:09:34,575
If he doesn't learn,
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00:09:34,658 --> 00:09:38,328
then how is he going
to take over the farm
one day?
89
00:09:38,412 --> 00:09:43,166
Maybe he's
not meant
for the farm.
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00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:46,878
You're a good father.
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00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:51,258
Hm.
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00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:01,018
She got it.
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00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:04,605
She did,
didn't she?
94
00:10:11,278 --> 00:10:14,281
Dad, that's it.
95
00:10:14,323 --> 00:10:16,533
What are you
doing, boy?
96
00:10:16,617 --> 00:10:18,285
John!
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00:10:20,162 --> 00:10:21,872
Didn't you
like it, Mom?
98
00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:24,750
Yes. Yes,
it's wonderful.
99
00:10:29,046 --> 00:10:30,047
John--
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00:10:37,929 --> 00:10:39,723
As I got older,
music seemed to be
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00:10:39,806 --> 00:10:41,391
the only thing
that made sense to me.
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00:10:41,475 --> 00:10:43,393
I was pretty good at it
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00:10:43,477 --> 00:10:46,229
and there was something
about sitting at a piano
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00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:50,317
that just made me feel
like I was home.
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00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:59,493
How do you think
that God views you?
106
00:10:59,576 --> 00:11:02,162
Have you asked
yourself this?
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00:11:02,204 --> 00:11:03,747
You should,
108
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:05,874
because your perception
of God
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00:11:05,957 --> 00:11:10,087
will have an effect
on every aspect
of your life.
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00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:12,005
In the Book of Romans,
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00:11:12,047 --> 00:11:15,842
Paul quoting Isaiah
speaks to the truth that
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00:11:15,926 --> 00:11:19,680
no one is righteous,
how we are all sinners.
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00:11:19,763 --> 00:11:22,724
But God commanded
his love toward us.
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00:11:24,935 --> 00:11:28,230
That was
wonderful, Richard.
Thank you,
Mrs. Kellner.
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00:11:28,313 --> 00:11:31,108
Now why don't you play
it how it was written?
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00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:33,527
Time to go, son.
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00:11:33,610 --> 00:11:35,612
He is
my best student.
118
00:11:35,696 --> 00:11:37,698
Well, at least
there's one thing
he's good at.
119
00:11:37,781 --> 00:11:38,949
It sure isn't farming.
120
00:11:39,032 --> 00:11:40,492
Let's get, boy.
121
00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:46,873
Growing up, people
would always tell me
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00:11:46,915 --> 00:11:48,667
that God
loved me
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00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:50,293
but I had
a hard time
believing that.
124
00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:54,089
I wondered
if God even liked me.
125
00:11:54,172 --> 00:11:58,927
Maybe it's because people
also told me that my dad
loved me.
126
00:11:59,010 --> 00:12:02,264
I mean, my dad
and I didn't connect'
or we couldn't connect'.
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00:12:02,347 --> 00:12:04,433
The things
he knew and understood
128
00:12:04,516 --> 00:12:08,103
weren '2' things I knew
and understood
and vice versa.
129
00:12:08,186 --> 00:12:12,149
They say that time
heals all wounds
130
00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:14,276
but honestly in our case
it just made things worse.
131
00:12:21,908 --> 00:12:23,326
I hate
being different.
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00:12:25,746 --> 00:12:27,748
I think God
knows what
he's doing, Wayne.
133
00:12:27,789 --> 00:12:30,834
Dad hates it, too.
134
00:12:30,917 --> 00:12:33,420
Your father
loves you.
135
00:12:33,503 --> 00:12:35,505
No, he loves
Dave and Lloyd.
136
00:12:35,589 --> 00:12:37,591
He understands them.
137
00:12:37,674 --> 00:12:41,344
He loves
all of you.
138
00:12:41,428 --> 00:12:43,930
Sometimes I just wish
I was more like them.
139
00:12:47,434 --> 00:12:48,977
I don't belong here.
140
00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:54,649
God's got
big plans
for you.
141
00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:55,984
I know it.
142
00:12:58,111 --> 00:13:00,781
You are going to do
great things one day.
143
00:13:15,796 --> 00:13:17,464
After high school,
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00:13:17,547 --> 00:13:19,883
I wasn't sure what
I was going to do.
145
00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:21,843
Home had became a place
146
00:13:21,927 --> 00:13:25,472
where you had to learn
the language of silence.
147
00:13:25,514 --> 00:13:28,809
My dad and I grew apart.
148
00:13:28,850 --> 00:13:35,816
Uh, you know, he grew inward
and I grew bitter.
149
00:13:35,899 --> 00:13:39,569
At' that time,
my rebellion
was in full swing.
150
00:13:39,653 --> 00:13:42,155
Uh, let's just say
that surrender
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00:13:42,197 --> 00:13:45,242
doesn't exactly
come naturally to me.
152
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:47,327
But I quickly learned
that God
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00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:49,663
can speak to us
in some pretty
unexpected ways.
154
00:13:53,917 --> 00:13:57,921
How do you respond
to these accusations
from your father?
155
00:13:58,004 --> 00:14:02,884
Do you dare defy
the ordinances
of Holy Mother Church ?
156
00:14:02,968 --> 00:14:06,054
How can you stand there
in defiance of your father?
157
00:14:06,137 --> 00:14:08,181
You're bestowed
with riches
beyond your worth
158
00:14:08,223 --> 00:14:10,016
and now
you rebuke their value?
159
00:14:10,058 --> 00:14:14,145
By what authority
do you do such things?
160
00:14:15,814 --> 00:14:19,442
I want to live
a life of freedom.
161
00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:21,194
I want to be as free
162
00:14:21,236 --> 00:14:23,905
as the animals
that roam this earth,
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00:14:23,989 --> 00:14:27,033
as free as the moon
in the night sky.
164
00:14:27,117 --> 00:14:30,745
These earthly possessions,
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00:14:30,829 --> 00:14:34,249
this noble stature,
166
00:14:34,332 --> 00:14:39,212
the adoration
that our society
craves is no use to me.
167
00:14:39,296 --> 00:14:41,256
But you're my son.
168
00:14:41,339 --> 00:14:43,633
I'm no longer
your son.
169
00:14:43,717 --> 00:14:46,261
Saint Francis was wild.
I mean,
170
00:14:46,344 --> 00:14:48,722
he fell
madly in love
with Jesus.
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00:14:48,763 --> 00:14:51,725
As a result of that,
he gave up everything
he had.
172
00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:53,894
Why are you doing this?
173
00:14:53,977 --> 00:14:56,897
God calls
to every man.
174
00:14:56,938 --> 00:15:00,609
But not every man responds.
175
00:15:00,692 --> 00:15:02,277
I connected to the story
of Saint Francis
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00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:04,321
in a lot of ways.
177
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:07,908
You know, he just had
this radical trust in Christ.
178
00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:10,994
It was a trust
that I didn't have.
179
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:13,330
But I wanted it.
180
00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:16,750
I knew that deep down
if I wanted to grow
that kind of faith,
181
00:15:16,791 --> 00:15:20,587
it wasn't going to happen
by staying at home.
182
00:15:20,629 --> 00:15:21,671
So I left.
183
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:53,828
You know, it's interesting.
184
00:15:53,912 --> 00:15:55,956
I had reached
a point in my life
185
00:15:56,039 --> 00:15:57,874
where I decided
to get serious
about my faith
186
00:15:57,958 --> 00:16:01,252
before I had no faith
to get serious about.
187
00:16:01,336 --> 00:16:03,088
Not that going
to Bible College
188
00:16:03,171 --> 00:16:04,339
is particularly
the place to get serious
189
00:16:04,422 --> 00:16:06,091
about your faith
190
00:16:06,174 --> 00:16:08,218
but nevertheless,
that's where I went.
191
00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:24,818
Hey! What are you
doing with my stuff?
192
00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:26,528
Oh, I thought
this would be okay.
193
00:16:26,611 --> 00:16:28,405
I prefer
to sleep with my--
You thought...
194
00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,740
this would be okay?
195
00:16:30,824 --> 00:16:32,409
Let me ask you
a question.
196
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:34,035
You ever stare danger
straight in the eye
197
00:16:34,119 --> 00:16:37,330
and live
to tell about it?
198
00:16:37,372 --> 00:16:38,415
Name's Sam.
199
00:16:39,666 --> 00:16:41,209
Just joking, man.
200
00:16:41,292 --> 00:16:42,585
You must be Rich.
Yeah.
201
00:16:42,669 --> 00:16:44,087
Yeah, nice
to meet you, man.
202
00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:45,755
You scared me there
for a second.
203
00:16:45,839 --> 00:16:47,298
I've got kind
of a weird sense
of humor.
204
00:16:47,382 --> 00:16:48,842
You should know
that up front.
205
00:16:48,883 --> 00:16:50,677
Hey, I think
that's everything.
206
00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:52,053
Your mom and I
are going
to head back.
207
00:16:52,137 --> 00:16:53,221
So--
Cool.
208
00:16:53,304 --> 00:16:54,431
Oh, hi.
I'm Morris.
209
00:16:54,514 --> 00:16:55,724
Hey,Dad.
Hi, Morris.
210
00:16:55,807 --> 00:16:56,975
I'm Rich.
I'm the dad.
211
00:16:57,058 --> 00:16:58,268
It's nice
to meet you.
212
00:16:58,351 --> 00:16:59,936
You can go
now, Dad.
213
00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:01,021
Yeah, we're going
to head back.
214
00:17:01,104 --> 00:17:02,689
Love you, Pops.
215
00:17:02,731 --> 00:17:04,190
I love you, too, man.
216
00:17:04,274 --> 00:17:05,900
You guys have fun.
We'll see you.
217
00:17:05,984 --> 00:17:07,777
There you go.
Nice to meet
you, Morris.
218
00:17:07,861 --> 00:17:09,779
Hey, um--
219
00:17:09,863 --> 00:17:11,698
I got
a question for you.
220
00:17:11,740 --> 00:17:13,700
You seem
kind of like
a handsome guy.
221
00:17:13,742 --> 00:17:15,952
I wasn't really popular
with the girls
in high school
222
00:17:16,036 --> 00:17:18,204
so I want you
to shoot me straight.
223
00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:20,915
Does this,
uh, beard
make me look fat?
224
00:17:23,460 --> 00:17:25,628
No, serious.
I don't know
how to answer
that question.
225
00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:27,380
That's fair enough.
That's fair enough.
226
00:17:29,340 --> 00:17:30,717
Oh, man.
227
00:17:30,759 --> 00:17:32,218
So you're a bully.
228
00:17:44,814 --> 00:17:49,736
My time at CBC
kind of flew by fast.
229
00:17:49,778 --> 00:17:53,656
Sam and I hit it
off well and became
good friends quickly.
230
00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:57,160
Being in
a structured institution,
231
00:17:57,243 --> 00:17:58,953
I found myself asking
a lot of questions
232
00:17:59,037 --> 00:18:01,623
about the church,
about authority.
233
00:18:01,706 --> 00:18:04,000
They weren't
always popular
with the faculty.
234
00:18:04,084 --> 00:18:07,128
oh, you play?
235
00:18:07,212 --> 00:18:08,922
Yeah, absolutely.
I play all the time.
236
00:18:09,005 --> 00:18:10,507
Oh,
Yeah, I saw
the case.
237
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:11,758
You want to jam?
Yeah'.!
238
00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:13,593
Yeah.
For sure.
239
00:18:13,635 --> 00:18:16,638
Sam and I formed
a small band called Zion.
240
00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:19,766
We started off playing
at small coffeeshops
around Cincinnati,
241
00:18:19,808 --> 00:18:23,311
and then eventually
in church auditoriums.
242
00:18:23,394 --> 00:18:25,105
The more I played,
the more I realized
243
00:18:25,188 --> 00:18:27,190
that I didn't want
to just play music.
244
00:18:27,273 --> 00:18:30,527
I wanted a ministry.
245
00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,654
So we moved off campus
our senior year
246
00:18:32,737 --> 00:18:35,115
with a couple
of the other
members of the band.
247
00:18:35,156 --> 00:18:38,159
It was exciting
to feel God working
through me
248
00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:42,622
even on a small stage
like Cincinnati.
249
00:18:52,048 --> 00:18:54,968
He is incredible.
250
00:18:55,009 --> 00:18:56,177
He's pretty good.
251
00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:01,766
There he
goes again.
252
00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:09,732
Richard.
Richard.
253
00:19:09,816 --> 00:19:11,109
I thought I told you
you weren't allowed
254
00:19:11,192 --> 00:19:13,069
to play
on campus anymore.
255
00:19:13,153 --> 00:19:15,363
Especially if you're bent
on destroying another piano.
256
00:19:15,446 --> 00:19:17,407
Mr. Walters,
I'm sorry.
257
00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:22,829
I asked Richard
to play for orientation.
It's my fault.
258
00:19:22,912 --> 00:19:24,831
Monday morning,
259
00:19:24,914 --> 00:19:27,208
I want you prepared
to quote the first
chapter of Isaiah
260
00:19:27,292 --> 00:19:29,252
in my office
eight a.m. sharp.
261
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:30,920
I can do that.
262
00:19:34,591 --> 00:19:35,758
Break it up.
263
00:19:35,842 --> 00:19:37,260
It was so good.
264
00:19:37,343 --> 00:19:38,761
Take it easy.
It was just one song.
265
00:19:38,845 --> 00:19:40,346
It was great.
It really was.
266
00:19:40,388 --> 00:19:41,848
I see
the Scripture
Police got you.
267
00:19:41,890 --> 00:19:43,766
You noticed
that, huh?
I did.
268
00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:46,686
Thankfully, he's given
me that chapter before.
269
00:19:46,769 --> 00:19:48,563
Man, what's up
with that guy?
270
00:19:48,646 --> 00:19:50,440
It's ridiculous.
271
00:19:50,523 --> 00:19:53,943
Hi. Um, that
was incredible.
272
00:19:54,027 --> 00:19:56,362
I've never heard
anything like that
before, ever.
273
00:19:57,739 --> 00:19:59,449
Um, I'm--
hi, I'm Beth.
274
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:00,909
I'm Rich.
275
00:20:00,992 --> 00:20:02,952
Nice to meet you.
You sing?
276
00:20:03,036 --> 00:20:06,539
Uh, yeah.
I mean, just
at, like,
277
00:20:06,623 --> 00:20:08,625
church at home.
278
00:20:08,708 --> 00:20:10,084
You should sing
with our band, Zion.
279
00:20:10,168 --> 00:20:11,794
You've never
heard me play.
280
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:13,588
I mean, sing.
281
00:20:13,671 --> 00:20:15,131
Oh, I'm sure
you're fine.
Jesus isn't picky.
282
00:20:17,342 --> 00:20:20,303
Um, this is
my friend, Jess.
283
00:20:20,386 --> 00:20:21,137
Say hi.
284
00:20:21,221 --> 00:20:22,555
He)'-
285
00:20:22,639 --> 00:20:23,932
That was great.
286
00:20:24,015 --> 00:20:25,433
You, too.
Or not
you too.
287
00:20:25,516 --> 00:20:27,101
I don't--
I don't sing
at all.
288
00:20:27,185 --> 00:20:31,481
No, that's not
what I meant. Um--
289
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:33,900
It was nice
to meet you.
290
00:20:33,942 --> 00:20:36,653
Yeah.
291
00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:38,488
We'll see
you around?
292
00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:40,198
Yep.
Got it.
293
00:20:43,910 --> 00:20:47,080
Ah. She's pretty, huh?
294
00:20:47,121 --> 00:20:49,249
Pretty cute.
295
00:20:51,793 --> 00:20:53,419
I tried my best
to ignore her
296
00:20:53,461 --> 00:20:56,172
and just focus
on Zion or school.
297
00:20:56,256 --> 00:20:58,925
But I couldn't help it.
298
00:20:58,967 --> 00:21:02,762
Uh, from the moment
I met Jess, I--
299
00:21:02,804 --> 00:21:04,597
I couldn't get her
out of my mind.
300
00:21:06,683 --> 00:21:08,601
Sorry about the car.
301
00:21:08,643 --> 00:21:11,187
I pretended to know,
like I know something
about cars
302
00:21:11,271 --> 00:21:12,855
for as long
as I could
and keep it up.
303
00:21:12,939 --> 00:21:14,524
I think
I figured it
out pretty quickly.
304
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:15,942
Yeah, sorry
about that.
It's all right.
305
00:21:15,984 --> 00:21:17,694
I'll stick
with the piano.
306
00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:20,029
Hold on.
307
00:21:20,113 --> 00:21:22,115
There are a lot
of really amazing
doors on this campus
308
00:21:22,156 --> 00:21:23,491
but these are
probably my favorite.
309
00:21:23,574 --> 00:21:25,451
They're beautiful.
310
00:21:25,493 --> 00:21:27,120
You want to sit
for a bit?
Sure.
311
00:21:28,621 --> 00:21:30,290
Do you write?
312
00:21:30,373 --> 00:21:32,709
Some.
ljournaL
313
00:21:32,792 --> 00:21:34,627
Journal?
314
00:21:34,669 --> 00:21:38,006
How morose
of you.
Hmm.
315
00:21:38,089 --> 00:21:39,674
What do you
write about?
316
00:21:39,757 --> 00:21:43,469
Oh, my dreams.
317
00:21:43,511 --> 00:21:45,680
Fears.
318
00:21:45,763 --> 00:21:50,393
Dreams about what?
319
00:21:50,476 --> 00:21:51,686
About the man
I'll marry
320
00:21:51,769 --> 00:21:53,021
and settle
down with.
321
00:21:55,857 --> 00:21:58,318
The house
we'll live in.
322
00:21:58,359 --> 00:22:00,361
The kids.
323
00:22:00,445 --> 00:22:01,446
The dog.
324
00:22:03,781 --> 00:22:05,158
That's what you
want most.
325
00:22:05,199 --> 00:22:07,076
Yeah.
326
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:10,747
Yeah, a home
and someone
to share it with.
327
00:22:10,830 --> 00:22:13,708
What about your fears?
328
00:22:13,791 --> 00:22:16,961
Being alone.
329
00:22:17,045 --> 00:22:21,007
No, I mean--
330
00:22:21,049 --> 00:22:26,179
I'm terrified
of myself sometimes,
331
00:22:26,262 --> 00:22:30,683
of this loneliness
I feel inside of me.
It's like, um--
332
00:22:30,767 --> 00:22:32,518
it's like
a black hole
or something.
333
00:22:39,859 --> 00:22:42,862
Even when you're
as close as you can be
to another person,
334
00:22:42,945 --> 00:22:47,367
even when you're touching.
335
00:22:47,408 --> 00:22:49,369
That's exactly it.
336
00:22:52,038 --> 00:22:53,206
Feel alone now?
337
00:23:18,064 --> 00:23:21,275
Jess and I
were immediately
drawn to each other.
338
00:23:21,359 --> 00:23:23,653
Over the next few months,
339
00:23:23,736 --> 00:23:25,613
I spent some of the most
meaningful days of my life
with her
340
00:23:25,696 --> 00:23:29,158
and learning
each other's stories,
341
00:23:29,242 --> 00:23:30,410
and sharing dreams.
342
00:23:35,540 --> 00:23:39,043
We were just two lonely people
who had found each other
in the dark.
343
00:23:48,970 --> 00:23:51,764
When I was with Jess,
I felt--
344
00:23:51,848 --> 00:23:55,768
I felt something
I hadn't felt
in a long time.
345
00:23:55,852 --> 00:23:57,145
I felt like I was home.
346
00:24:04,318 --> 00:24:10,116
J3 Life goes on
and so must the song J3
347
00:24:10,158 --> 00:24:13,286
X1 D00 doo doooo
doc D
348
00:24:24,464 --> 00:24:26,799
J Sing your praise
to the Lord ?
349
00:24:26,841 --> 00:24:29,343
Come on everybody
and stand up and sing
one more
350
00:24:29,427 --> 00:24:32,221
J Hallelujah, sing
your praise
to the Lord
351
00:24:32,305 --> 00:24:34,891
J I can never tell you .U
I love it.
352
00:24:34,974 --> 00:24:37,560
Is that the guy?
353
00:24:37,643 --> 00:24:38,644
I love it.
354
00:24:40,188 --> 00:24:44,233
I want to do
this one.
Bryan?
355
00:24:44,317 --> 00:24:45,818
It's very different.
356
00:24:45,902 --> 00:24:48,154
I like different.
I'm sick of the same.
357
00:24:48,196 --> 00:24:49,530
I want to do this song.
358
00:24:49,614 --> 00:24:53,493
Yeah. I'm
with Amy
on this.
359
00:24:53,576 --> 00:24:56,996
It's a good song.
360
00:24:59,081 --> 00:25:00,708
I'll make
the call.
361
00:25:00,791 --> 00:25:02,585
Rich!
Ric h a rd!
362
00:25:02,668 --> 00:25:03,794
Rich! Pick
up the phone!
363
00:25:03,878 --> 00:25:05,463
Right here.
364
00:25:05,546 --> 00:25:07,340
Get on the phone
right now!
Who is it?
365
00:25:07,381 --> 00:25:09,717
What are you
freaking out about?
It's Nashville!
366
00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:11,886
The city
of Nashville
is calling?
367
00:25:11,969 --> 00:25:15,515
No, it's some guy
from a record label
that represents Amy Grant.
368
00:25:15,598 --> 00:25:17,850
And he wants
to talk to you!
369
00:25:17,892 --> 00:25:19,519
Did you do this?
No!
370
00:25:19,602 --> 00:25:21,521
Was it Gary?
It wasn't me.
371
00:25:21,562 --> 00:25:23,856
It's Beth.
This had to have
been Beth. Beth!
372
00:25:28,152 --> 00:25:29,779
Just' pick
up the phone.
373
00:25:29,862 --> 00:25:30,696
Turn it off.
374
00:25:30,780 --> 00:25:32,031
Hello?
375
00:25:32,114 --> 00:25:33,533
Yes, is this
Rich Mullins?
376
00:25:33,574 --> 00:25:35,243
This is Rich Mullins.
377
00:25:35,326 --> 00:25:37,870
Rich, this is Bryan
Bontrager from Nashville.
378
00:25:37,912 --> 00:25:40,706
Well, what can I do
for you Bryan Bontrager
from Nashville?
379
00:25:40,748 --> 00:25:42,792
Rich,
380
00:25:42,875 --> 00:25:46,087
Amy Grant heard your song
Sing Your Praise
to the Lord
381
00:25:46,170 --> 00:25:49,131
and she wants to use it
on her next album.
382
00:25:49,215 --> 00:25:53,302
Who's Amy Grant?
Are you kidding me?
Oh!
383
00:25:53,386 --> 00:25:55,137
Excuse me?
384
00:25:55,221 --> 00:25:57,557
Shhh.
Sorry about that.
Go ahead.
385
00:25:57,598 --> 00:26:00,643
Okay, well, um,
listen, Rich,
386
00:26:00,726 --> 00:26:02,395
we'd like to bring you
down to Nashville
387
00:26:02,478 --> 00:26:04,230
here so we can work
out the writing contract.
388
00:26:04,272 --> 00:26:07,400
Wow, thanks
Bryan, but, uh,
389
00:26:07,483 --> 00:26:09,318
I'm not really
interested.
390
00:26:09,402 --> 00:26:11,988
You're not interested?
391
00:26:13,239 --> 00:26:15,658
Um, look Rich,
392
00:26:15,741 --> 00:26:18,744
I don't think you understand
what we're offering you
here, okay?
393
00:26:18,828 --> 00:26:20,955
This is a gamechanger.
394
00:26:21,038 --> 00:26:23,165
I'm not really sure
I want my game
to be changed.
395
00:26:23,249 --> 00:26:25,960
Okay, well, um, Rich,
396
00:26:26,043 --> 00:26:28,754
maybe you should
think about this.
397
00:26:28,796 --> 00:26:31,632
You have a real gift
398
00:26:31,716 --> 00:26:33,009
and maybe you
should be using it.
399
00:26:33,092 --> 00:26:36,012
Well, I think
I am using it.
400
00:26:36,095 --> 00:26:39,348
All right, well, um,
401
00:26:39,432 --> 00:26:42,268
I,uh,hope
you change your mind.
402
00:26:42,310 --> 00:26:44,020
Well, thanks
for the call, Bryan.
I appreciate it.
403
00:26:44,103 --> 00:26:45,396
Take care.
404
00:26:55,323 --> 00:26:57,783
What?
405
00:27:19,388 --> 00:27:21,474
When are we going to talk
about the Nashville thing?
406
00:27:25,061 --> 00:27:27,063
We're not going
to talk about
the Nashville thing
407
00:27:27,146 --> 00:27:29,398
because I'm not going
to Nashville.
408
00:27:29,482 --> 00:27:32,026
You have to go.
409
00:27:32,109 --> 00:27:33,986
Well, are you
coming with me?
410
00:27:34,070 --> 00:27:36,405
You know I can't do that.
We're not even
married yet.
411
00:27:36,489 --> 00:27:37,657
What is this?
412
00:27:37,740 --> 00:27:39,533
Is this
your parents?
413
00:27:39,617 --> 00:27:42,244
It's not just
my parents.
414
00:27:42,328 --> 00:27:45,873
You knew
what I wanted.
415
00:27:45,956 --> 00:27:47,375
Your life
is headed
416
00:27:47,458 --> 00:27:49,877
in a totally
different direction.
417
00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:53,422
You don't want to be 41
and stuck in Cincinnati.
418
00:27:53,506 --> 00:27:56,092
Yes, I do.
419
00:27:56,175 --> 00:27:57,843
If you're there,
I do.
420
00:28:02,515 --> 00:28:04,016
You don't belong here.
421
00:28:28,207 --> 00:28:30,876
Hey, Jess,
it's me, uh--
422
00:28:30,918 --> 00:28:32,586
hey, I didn't see you
at the show tonight.
423
00:28:32,670 --> 00:28:34,255
I thought you were
going to be there.
424
00:28:34,338 --> 00:28:35,881
Um...just give
me a call.
425
00:29:05,411 --> 00:29:07,121
I just don't understand
426
00:29:07,204 --> 00:29:08,998
why everything
you touch ends up busted.
427
00:29:09,081 --> 00:29:11,167
Why everything
you touch ends up busted.
428
00:29:15,588 --> 00:29:17,757
Hey, hey, Jess,
it's me.
429
00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:21,677
Listen, call me when
you get this, I just
want to talk.
430
00:29:21,761 --> 00:29:25,931
I just, I just feel
like we're not--
431
00:29:25,973 --> 00:29:29,810
I just, I just want to talk
about what's happening
with us.
432
00:29:29,894 --> 00:29:32,146
I was just calling
to make sure everything
is okay.
433
00:29:34,356 --> 00:29:35,858
I just feel
like we're not connecting
434
00:29:35,941 --> 00:29:37,401
and I don't know...
435
00:29:37,443 --> 00:29:39,779
why we keep
going back and forth
436
00:29:39,862 --> 00:29:41,363
and if there's something
I've done or--
437
00:29:47,328 --> 00:29:50,664
Jess, if the problem is me,
then I just want you
to tell me.
438
00:30:10,267 --> 00:30:11,477
Hello?
439
00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:13,687
Hey, Mom.
440
00:30:13,771 --> 00:30:15,314
Are you okay?
441
00:30:15,356 --> 00:30:18,192
I was just missing--
missing you guys.
442
00:30:18,275 --> 00:30:19,819
I just wanted
to say hi.
443
00:30:19,860 --> 00:30:22,822
Neva, I get
up at 4 a.m.
444
00:30:22,905 --> 00:30:24,824
Calm yourself.
445
00:30:24,865 --> 00:30:26,867
Mom, can I
talk to Dad
for a second?
446
00:30:26,951 --> 00:30:28,828
Yeah.
447
00:30:28,911 --> 00:30:30,996
Hey, he wants
to talk to you.
448
00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:37,253
Tell that boy to call
back at a decent hour
and -I'll- talk to him.
449
00:30:37,336 --> 00:30:39,171
He said to say
that he loves you
450
00:30:39,255 --> 00:30:41,590
and that
he'll call you later.
451
00:30:41,674 --> 00:30:43,092
He didn't say
that, Mom.
452
00:30:43,175 --> 00:30:45,511
You know
your father
loves you.
453
00:30:45,553 --> 00:30:47,763
He just has
to be at work.
454
00:30:47,847 --> 00:30:50,391
Neva, this is
not the time
for his nonsense.
455
00:30:50,474 --> 00:30:53,060
Hang up
the damn phone.
456
00:30:53,143 --> 00:30:55,604
He's just tired.
457
00:30:55,688 --> 00:30:58,566
Yeah. Well, sorry
for calling so late.
458
00:30:58,649 --> 00:31:01,026
All right.
459
00:31:01,110 --> 00:31:02,111
Love you.
460
00:31:31,140 --> 00:31:32,391
Hey, Rich.
461
00:31:32,433 --> 00:31:34,059
Sam'?
Yeah.
462
00:31:34,101 --> 00:31:37,980
Come here.
463
00:31:38,063 --> 00:31:40,065
Where were you?
464
00:31:40,149 --> 00:31:42,818
Have you
been drinking?
Answer me!
465
00:31:42,902 --> 00:31:44,403
Gary and I
went to a movie.
466
00:31:47,156 --> 00:31:49,033
Why didn't you
ask me to go?
467
00:31:49,116 --> 00:31:50,618
Dude, I think you
need to sleep
it off.
468
00:31:50,701 --> 00:31:51,744
I think
you're drunk.
469
00:31:51,827 --> 00:31:52,828
I'm fine.
470
00:31:54,413 --> 00:31:56,790
I take it back.
471
00:31:56,874 --> 00:31:58,751
I know you're drunk.
472
00:31:58,834 --> 00:32:01,128
Sleep it off.
473
00:32:04,715 --> 00:32:06,258
What's this?
474
00:32:06,342 --> 00:32:07,384
It's a camel.
What do you
think it is?
475
00:32:07,468 --> 00:32:08,928
It's not a camel.
476
00:32:10,346 --> 00:32:12,348
Sam.
477
00:32:12,431 --> 00:32:14,433
Yeah?
478
00:32:14,516 --> 00:32:16,435
Are we
really friends?
479
00:32:20,230 --> 00:32:22,358
Sam invited me
to come to Wichita
480
00:32:22,441 --> 00:32:25,486
with him to stay
with his folks
and sort things out.
481
00:32:25,569 --> 00:32:29,657
The Nashville situation
had thrown a lot of my world
out of joint.
482
00:32:29,740 --> 00:32:32,284
I wasn't totally sure
how to put it back.
483
00:32:32,326 --> 00:32:36,455
I think a large pan' of me
worried that what Jess
had said was true.
484
00:32:36,538 --> 00:32:37,790
I had to go.
485
00:32:40,292 --> 00:32:41,460
Rich!
486
00:32:43,712 --> 00:32:46,298
I'll be right back.
We 're out of milk.
487
00:32:46,340 --> 00:32:48,133
Could I talk to you
for a second, Morris?
488
00:32:48,175 --> 00:32:50,844
Yeah.
Absolutely.
489
00:32:50,928 --> 00:32:52,221
What's on your mind?
490
00:32:52,304 --> 00:32:54,890
Oh. Quite a lot.
491
00:32:54,974 --> 00:32:56,517
And Nashville.
492
00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:57,810
Yeah, you heard
about that?
493
00:32:57,893 --> 00:33:00,813
Yeah.
Yeah.
494
00:33:00,896 --> 00:33:02,815
Yeah, Jessie
doesn't want to go
495
00:33:02,856 --> 00:33:05,693
and, um--
496
00:33:05,776 --> 00:33:07,528
she hates
the whole idea
of touring but, man,
497
00:33:07,611 --> 00:33:09,363
I don't know
how to do this
without her.
498
00:33:09,446 --> 00:33:12,574
You-you
want to tour,
do your music.
499
00:33:12,658 --> 00:33:16,495
Yeah, absolutely.
I just don't want
to do it alone.
500
00:33:16,578 --> 00:33:20,165
Yeah. Well,
relationships are
funny that way.
501
00:33:20,207 --> 00:33:23,335
They don't necessarily
fix those kind
of problems.
502
00:33:23,377 --> 00:33:26,422
And if you kind of give
up this dream
for that dream,
503
00:33:26,505 --> 00:33:28,507
you might lose
both of them.
504
00:33:28,549 --> 00:33:31,010
Hm.
It sort of happens
that way sometimes.
505
00:33:31,093 --> 00:33:34,096
You know why I think
Jesus didn't have
a girl?
506
00:33:34,179 --> 00:33:37,099
I am dying to hear
this one. Why?
507
00:33:37,182 --> 00:33:40,019
He didn't have
a home to take
her to.
508
00:33:40,102 --> 00:33:42,688
The guy was a Vagabond,
I mean--
509
00:33:42,730 --> 00:33:44,940
The only thing I know
is that Jesus would
not like Nashville.
510
00:33:45,024 --> 00:33:48,027
I mean-- I just mean
all these cheesy artists
511
00:33:48,110 --> 00:33:50,195
like trying
to make a cheap buck
off of his name.
512
00:33:50,279 --> 00:33:52,031
The whole thing
makes me want
to puke, to be honest.
513
00:33:52,114 --> 00:33:54,700
Maybe that's why he
wants you to be
a part of it.
514
00:33:54,742 --> 00:33:57,286
Yeah. I don't know
if God needs me
to change Nashville.
515
00:33:57,369 --> 00:33:58,954
Oh, I'm sure
he doesn't.
516
00:33:59,038 --> 00:34:02,207
But he still might
want you to be there.
517
00:34:02,291 --> 00:34:04,543
It's just you have
to be careful
518
00:34:04,585 --> 00:34:07,046
thinking that holiness
is about finding
the right place
519
00:34:07,087 --> 00:34:09,131
and doing
the right things.
520
00:34:09,214 --> 00:34:11,550
Because it's
really not that.
521
00:34:11,633 --> 00:34:14,470
I mean, holiness
is really about
522
00:34:14,553 --> 00:34:17,139
loving God
in the moment.
523
00:34:17,222 --> 00:34:19,266
I found in my own life
there are a lot of things
I know
524
00:34:19,349 --> 00:34:23,145
and there
are some things
I don't know.
525
00:34:23,228 --> 00:34:26,065
But if I
give it time,
526
00:34:26,148 --> 00:34:28,400
if I really walk
in faith on it,
527
00:34:28,484 --> 00:34:30,486
I don't have
answers to everything,
528
00:34:30,569 --> 00:34:33,739
but I've been amazed
at the things I
found out.
529
00:34:33,781 --> 00:34:35,657
And the thing
I know about it,
530
00:34:35,741 --> 00:34:37,659
is that God loves you
no matter what
you choose.
531
00:34:37,743 --> 00:34:39,828
And he's
going to be there.
532
00:34:39,912 --> 00:34:42,748
He's going to be there
with you on this journey.
533
00:34:42,790 --> 00:34:44,583
All right. So what
about the girl?
534
00:34:44,625 --> 00:34:46,794
Yeah.
535
00:34:46,877 --> 00:34:48,670
Well, I don't know
everything about women--
536
00:34:51,215 --> 00:34:55,677
But I have been married
to one woman for almost
20 years.
537
00:34:55,761 --> 00:34:58,347
And the reason
that works
is because
538
00:34:58,430 --> 00:35:01,475
she says, "Go get milk"
and I go get milk.
539
00:35:01,558 --> 00:35:03,519
And then I pick
up ice cream.
540
00:35:03,602 --> 00:35:06,522
Ooh, I hear you.
541
00:35:06,605 --> 00:35:08,190
Rocky Road.
542
00:35:08,273 --> 00:35:09,858
There is
no other kind.
543
00:35:11,443 --> 00:35:12,694
I'll be right back.
Thanks, Morris.
544
00:35:12,778 --> 00:35:13,862
All right, I'll see you.
545
00:35:19,409 --> 00:35:21,286
He still not here?
546
00:35:21,370 --> 00:35:23,372
He'll be here.
547
00:35:23,455 --> 00:35:26,625
I want to make sure
we get a few things
clear before I go on.
548
00:35:26,708 --> 00:35:29,169
Hey man, we've done
this before. It's
going to be okay.
549
00:35:29,253 --> 00:35:31,463
Not in my church.
550
00:35:31,505 --> 00:35:35,217
First off, you boys all
better find yourselves
some shoes.
551
00:35:35,300 --> 00:35:36,885
This is a house of God.
552
00:35:36,969 --> 00:35:39,471
And clean up,
tuck your shirt tail in,
553
00:35:39,513 --> 00:35:41,723
have some self respect.
554
00:35:41,807 --> 00:35:44,893
I'm going to be talking
today about being holy,
555
00:35:44,977 --> 00:35:47,396
being disciplined,
and shaping up.
556
00:35:47,479 --> 00:35:49,148
And I want you
to play something
557
00:35:49,189 --> 00:35:51,650
that will really drive
that message home.
558
00:35:51,733 --> 00:35:53,610
You understand?
559
00:35:53,694 --> 00:35:55,904
And I hope
you'll be out there
listening to my sermon.
560
00:35:59,616 --> 00:36:01,869
So, Gary, do you
want to tell Richard?
561
00:36:01,952 --> 00:36:05,414
If you're going to get
serious about your faith,
562
00:36:05,497 --> 00:36:08,500
you need to look
at this book like
a rule book.
563
00:36:08,542 --> 00:36:12,754
It has the dos
and the don'ts.
564
00:36:12,838 --> 00:36:15,257
Are you going
to follow
the dos?
565
00:36:15,340 --> 00:36:17,926
Or will you
choose the don '13?
566
00:36:18,010 --> 00:36:20,721
As Zion comes up
to close us in song,
567
00:36:20,804 --> 00:36:23,724
I want to leave you
with this question.
568
00:36:23,807 --> 00:36:25,434
Would Christ
be proud of you?
569
00:36:42,034 --> 00:36:48,207
Yeah, I don't want
to be disrespectful.
I know we're guests here,
570
00:36:48,248 --> 00:36:50,792
but I kind of think
how disrespectful
it would be
571
00:36:50,876 --> 00:36:54,129
to not be honest
with the church.
572
00:36:54,213 --> 00:36:57,299
I think it was
the theologian Karl Barth
573
00:36:57,382 --> 00:37:00,302
who was asked once
what's the most--
574
00:37:00,385 --> 00:37:05,474
What's the most theologically
profound statement
575
00:37:05,557 --> 00:37:09,311
and this is
how he responded.
576
00:37:09,394 --> 00:37:14,399
J3 Jesus loves me
this I know J3
577
00:37:14,441 --> 00:37:16,985
DD
578
00:37:17,069 --> 00:37:22,658
J? For the Bible tells me so J3
579
00:37:22,741 --> 00:37:24,243
DD
580
00:37:24,284 --> 00:37:29,623
J3 They're the ones
to Him belong J3
581
00:37:29,706 --> 00:37:35,671
D They are weak
but he is strong 53
582
00:37:35,754 --> 00:37:36,922
DD
583
00:37:37,005 --> 00:37:42,636
J3 Yes, Jesus loves me J3
584
00:37:42,719 --> 00:37:47,266
J3 Yes, Jesus
loves me J3
585
00:37:47,307 --> 00:37:49,017
DD
586
00:37:49,101 --> 00:37:54,523
Yes, Jesus loves me
587
00:37:54,606 --> 00:37:59,361
J? The Bible tells me so J3
588
00:37:59,444 --> 00:38:05,200
DD
589
00:38:05,284 --> 00:38:09,454
Whenever I hear people
say that Christians
are hypocrites,
590
00:38:09,538 --> 00:38:11,707
I kind of go,
"Man, every time
we get together
591
00:38:11,790 --> 00:38:14,126
-we're confessing
that we're hypocrites.-
592
00:38:14,167 --> 00:38:16,712
DD
593
00:38:16,795 --> 00:38:18,714
The need of God
and the need
of each other,
594
00:38:18,797 --> 00:38:23,552
DD
595
00:38:23,635 --> 00:38:25,220
it's all the pretending
to be perfect
596
00:38:25,304 --> 00:38:30,642
that breeds
inauthenticity in the church.
597
00:38:30,726 --> 00:38:34,187
Because none Of US are.
598
00:38:34,271 --> 00:38:36,481
DD
599
00:38:36,565 --> 00:38:41,069
I've been wrestling lately
with-with surrender myself.
600
00:38:41,153 --> 00:38:45,657
DD
601
00:38:45,741 --> 00:38:47,326
But He loves us still.
602
00:38:50,454 --> 00:38:51,872
DD
603
00:38:58,503 --> 00:39:01,006
I think I need
to go to Nashville.
604
00:39:03,425 --> 00:39:05,677
DD
605
00:39:05,761 --> 00:39:10,432
Whether I go
or whether I don't go,
606
00:39:10,515 --> 00:39:12,392
I kind of think
it doesn't matter.
607
00:39:12,476 --> 00:39:15,270
DD
608
00:39:15,354 --> 00:39:17,773
Because in the end
all that really matters,
609
00:39:22,027 --> 00:39:27,449
J3 Yes, Jesus loves me J3
610
00:39:27,532 --> 00:39:32,037
J3 Yes, Jesus
loves me J3
611
00:39:32,120 --> 00:39:33,580
DD
612
00:39:33,663 --> 00:39:38,794
J3 Yes, Jesus loves me J3
613
00:39:38,877 --> 00:39:43,799
J? The Bible tells me so J3
614
00:39:43,882 --> 00:39:46,885
DD
615
00:39:46,968 --> 00:39:50,097
Nashville is so
not ready for him.
616
00:39:50,180 --> 00:39:51,473
I know.
617
00:39:53,683 --> 00:39:56,311
Hey!
618
00:39:56,395 --> 00:39:59,272
You weren't going to go
without saying goodbye
to me, were you?
619
00:40:03,735 --> 00:40:04,945
Miss me.
620
00:40:05,028 --> 00:40:08,073
Yeah.
Of course I will.
621
00:40:08,156 --> 00:40:09,825
You're the one
that got me
into this mess,
622
00:40:09,908 --> 00:40:11,410
this whole
Nashville thing.
623
00:40:13,912 --> 00:40:17,541
You just don't want
to go without Jess, so...
624
00:40:17,624 --> 00:40:19,668
quit being
a chicken, right?
625
00:40:24,714 --> 00:40:26,842
Just don't forget
about us, okay?
626
00:40:32,222 --> 00:40:33,140
Richard!
627
00:40:34,641 --> 00:40:37,185
Hey. I got to go
but don't forget
628
00:40:37,269 --> 00:40:38,395
who your real
friends are.
629
00:40:40,063 --> 00:40:41,064
I'll miss you.
630
00:40:43,900 --> 00:40:45,235
Time to go.
631
00:40:49,489 --> 00:40:50,490
You Okay?
632
00:40:54,453 --> 00:40:57,372
She's right.
633
00:40:57,456 --> 00:41:00,625
I am
so scared.
634
00:41:00,709 --> 00:41:04,963
It'll be okay.
We're only
five hours away.
635
00:41:05,046 --> 00:41:06,715
I'm doing what He
wants me to do.
636
00:41:06,798 --> 00:41:10,051
You'd think this would
be easier or something.
637
00:41:10,135 --> 00:41:12,137
If you're really
so scared about going,
638
00:41:12,220 --> 00:41:13,847
why don't you
move this junk
639
00:41:13,930 --> 00:41:15,474
and -I'll- ride with you
to the edge of town.
640
00:41:15,557 --> 00:41:16,600
Let me get
my wallet.
641
00:41:20,479 --> 00:41:21,563
Hey. hey!
642
00:41:22,814 --> 00:41:25,066
Hey, uh--
643
00:41:25,150 --> 00:41:28,153
I think you packed
up some of my shirts.
644
00:41:31,031 --> 00:41:32,991
Leaving Cincinnati
for Nashville
645
00:41:33,074 --> 00:41:36,077
was one
of the hardest things
I've ever done.
646
00:41:36,161 --> 00:41:42,042
I felt like I was trading
one life for another.
647
00:41:42,125 --> 00:41:43,877
But I couldn't shake
the feeling
648
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:45,212
that God wanted me
there for some reason.
649
00:41:54,888 --> 00:41:58,183
It was a whirlwind
from the time I arrived.
650
00:41:58,225 --> 00:42:00,435
-Sing- Your -Praise to the- Lord
was a big hit for Amy
651
00:42:00,519 --> 00:42:02,437
and her album
became the biggest'
selling album
652
00:42:02,521 --> 00:42:04,606
in Christian radio
at the time so
653
00:42:04,689 --> 00:42:07,859
so of course they wanted
me to write more songs.
654
00:42:07,943 --> 00:42:10,153
As much
as I enjoyed
writing music,
655
00:42:10,237 --> 00:42:16,201
I felt more and more
that I wanted to record
my own work.
656
00:42:16,284 --> 00:42:20,372
I had meetings
with publishers
but without much luck
657
00:42:20,455 --> 00:42:22,415
and I'm not sure I fit
658
00:42:22,499 --> 00:42:24,793
the aesthetic
of contemporary
Christian music.
659
00:42:24,876 --> 00:42:27,128
Besides, songwriting
and royalties gave
me something
660
00:42:27,212 --> 00:42:30,882
I'd never had
before, which was
a steady income.
661
00:42:30,966 --> 00:42:32,717
Not that I entirely knew
what to do with it.
662
00:42:38,223 --> 00:42:40,308
All the money in Nashville
couldn't change the fact
663
00:42:40,392 --> 00:42:42,811
that I missed
my friends back home.
664
00:42:42,894 --> 00:42:44,771
Especially Jess.
665
00:43:06,710 --> 00:43:09,963
J /fyou find
a love that's lender
666
00:43:10,046 --> 00:43:13,174
J3 If you find
someone that's true J3
667
00:43:13,258 --> 00:43:15,302
57 Thank the Lord
668
00:43:15,385 --> 00:43:18,013
D He's been doubw good
to you 5311
669
00:43:21,975 --> 00:43:23,810
That's beautiful.
670
00:43:23,893 --> 00:43:25,854
You doing okay?
671
00:43:25,937 --> 00:43:27,439
Got into another fight
with Matt and Bryan.
672
00:43:27,522 --> 00:43:29,608
Another one, huh?
673
00:43:29,649 --> 00:43:31,443
This one was messy.
674
00:43:31,484 --> 00:43:33,987
You sure don't like
to play by the rules,
do you?
675
00:43:34,070 --> 00:43:36,781
Amy, I don't even know
what the rules are.
676
00:43:36,823 --> 00:43:39,200
I've been here for a while now,
I've been writing for a while,
677
00:43:39,284 --> 00:43:41,661
don't get me wrong,
I like writing
for you
678
00:43:41,745 --> 00:43:44,706
and I like writing
for people
679
00:43:44,789 --> 00:43:46,374
but I want to record
my own stuff.
680
00:43:46,458 --> 00:43:48,460
And they won't
even hear me out.
681
00:43:48,501 --> 00:43:50,337
So why don't they?
682
00:43:50,420 --> 00:43:51,921
I mean, they're keeping
me out of the loop
on this.
683
00:43:52,005 --> 00:43:55,342
They say my songs
are too dark or too--
684
00:43:55,425 --> 00:43:59,846
I don't know, not happy enough,
not cheery and cheesy,
if you ask me.
685
00:43:59,929 --> 00:44:03,224
What were you playing
when I walked in?
686
00:44:03,308 --> 00:44:04,476
Did you like it?
687
00:44:04,559 --> 00:44:06,311
Yeah.
Did you really?
688
00:44:06,394 --> 00:44:08,521
Yeah.
Really really?
689
00:44:09,898 --> 00:44:12,984
I loved it.
What is it?
690
00:44:13,068 --> 00:44:15,904
It's a song I wrote
for my wedding.
691
00:44:15,987 --> 00:44:18,156
Can you play me
the rest of the song?
692
00:44:18,198 --> 00:44:20,241
Yeah.
693
00:44:20,325 --> 00:44:21,409
Sure.
694
00:44:21,493 --> 00:44:23,161
It's just a chorus.
695
00:44:25,664 --> 00:44:30,502
D You can thank the Father
for the things that He
has done 3
696
00:44:30,585 --> 00:44:32,712
DD
697
00:44:32,796 --> 00:44:36,716
D Thank mm
for the tmngs
He's yet to do 53
698
00:44:36,800 --> 00:44:38,343
DD
699
00:44:38,385 --> 00:44:42,013
J3 If you find
a love that's tender J3
700
00:44:42,055 --> 00:44:45,100
J3 If you find
someone who's true J3
701
00:44:45,183 --> 00:44:47,102
D Thank the Lord D
702
00:44:47,185 --> 00:44:49,771
J3 He's been doubly good
to you J3
703
00:44:49,854 --> 00:44:51,606
DD
704
00:44:51,690 --> 00:44:53,775
Rich, seriously you have
to give me that song.
705
00:44:53,858 --> 00:44:56,027
I want that song.
706
00:44:56,111 --> 00:44:57,195
Sorry.
707
00:44:59,239 --> 00:45:02,033
That one's for the girl.
708
00:45:48,121 --> 00:45:52,417
You know, I'm being asked
by people all the time
709
00:45:52,500 --> 00:45:54,085
how do you feel
close to God.
710
00:45:54,127 --> 00:45:56,463
And I kind of go
711
00:45:56,546 --> 00:45:59,090
-You know what?
I don't really know that.-
712
00:45:59,174 --> 00:46:02,927
When I think
about the lives
of--of the great saints
713
00:46:03,011 --> 00:46:08,767
I don't necessarily think
that they always felt
close to God.
714
00:46:08,808 --> 00:46:11,102
See, closest to God,
it isn't about feelings.
715
00:46:11,144 --> 00:46:15,106
Closest to God
is about obedience.
716
00:46:15,148 --> 00:46:18,818
But if we don't obey,
we don't even have
a chance.
717
00:46:27,786 --> 00:46:29,287
What's up, bud?
718
00:46:29,329 --> 00:46:31,664
Hey, Rich.
719
00:46:31,748 --> 00:46:33,208
That was
a really good show.
720
00:46:33,291 --> 00:46:36,211
Thanks.
It was fun.
721
00:46:36,294 --> 00:46:38,963
Can I talk
to you for a second?
722
00:46:39,047 --> 00:46:40,632
Yeah.
Absolutely.
723
00:46:40,673 --> 00:46:41,966
What's up?
724
00:46:42,050 --> 00:46:43,468
No, it's just--
I just
725
00:46:43,551 --> 00:46:47,096
want to say thank you
726
00:46:47,180 --> 00:46:48,264
for what you
said in there.
727
00:46:48,348 --> 00:46:51,309
Yeah, you bet, man.
728
00:46:51,351 --> 00:46:53,645
What did I say exactly?
729
00:46:53,728 --> 00:46:54,979
You said a lot.
730
00:46:55,063 --> 00:46:56,481
' -1
731
00:46:56,564 --> 00:46:59,359
I'm not feeling close
to God.
Hm.
732
00:46:59,442 --> 00:47:04,531
It's just that I struggle
a lot with loneliness.
733
00:47:04,614 --> 00:47:06,366
I'm going to fill you
in on a little secret
734
00:47:06,449 --> 00:47:07,909
that they won't tell
you in Sunday School.
735
00:47:07,992 --> 00:47:09,410
All the heroes
in the Bible,
736
00:47:09,494 --> 00:47:12,372
all the weirdos
in the Bible,
737
00:47:12,455 --> 00:47:14,541
they all struggled
with the same stuff.
738
00:47:14,624 --> 00:47:17,544
Loneliness and all of it.
739
00:47:17,627 --> 00:47:22,507
It's just that some
of us aren't afraid
to admit it.
740
00:47:25,009 --> 00:47:27,053
You know?
741
00:47:28,972 --> 00:47:31,224
It's my dad.
I've got to go.
742
00:47:31,307 --> 00:47:33,518
I won't forget.
Thanks, Rich.
743
00:47:33,560 --> 00:47:35,520
You bet, man.
Nice to meet you.
744
00:47:35,603 --> 00:47:37,188
Good night.
Good night.
745
00:47:42,861 --> 00:47:44,404
Every small conversation
746
00:47:44,487 --> 00:47:46,447
or fleeting moment
ofconnecfion
747
00:47:46,531 --> 00:47:49,117
reminded me that despite
all the flaws and tackiness
748
00:47:49,200 --> 00:47:50,952
of the Christian
music industry,
749
00:47:51,035 --> 00:47:53,246
God had given me
something to say
750
00:47:53,329 --> 00:47:55,456
and a platform
to share it.
751
00:47:55,540 --> 00:48:00,545
I realized
that music could be
more than just music.
752
00:48:00,628 --> 00:48:03,798
But they didn '2' let me
start just making records
over night.
753
00:48:03,882 --> 00:48:06,092
It took some convincing.
754
00:48:06,175 --> 00:48:08,553
Did you read the letter?
755
00:48:08,636 --> 00:48:10,305
I haven '2' had time.
Man', this is important.
756
00:48:10,388 --> 00:48:11,806
Can you at least tell
me you'll read it today?
757
00:48:11,890 --> 00:48:14,225
Just tell me,
what is it?
758
00:48:14,309 --> 00:48:16,477
I want to talk to you
about me recording
my own songs.
759
00:48:16,561 --> 00:48:19,022
You know I think
you're an amazing writer,
760
00:48:19,105 --> 00:48:21,357
but I don't think
you're ready to be
a recording artist.
761
00:48:21,441 --> 00:48:24,235
Sorry, we'll just talk
about this later, okay?
762
00:48:24,319 --> 00:48:26,154
What?
When I'm ready, Matt?
763
00:48:26,237 --> 00:48:27,739
What's with you, Rich?
764
00:48:27,822 --> 00:48:29,532
Do you really want
to do this here?
765
00:48:29,574 --> 00:48:31,284
In front of Amy-
I have
a right to know!
766
00:48:31,367 --> 00:48:33,244
Look, you really want
to be a recording artist?
767
00:48:33,328 --> 00:48:34,746
Then everything's
got to change.
768
00:48:34,829 --> 00:48:36,623
Your look,
the way
you dress,
769
00:48:36,706 --> 00:48:39,334
it's your
stage presence--
What about my songs?
770
00:48:39,417 --> 00:48:41,127
I don't think
they're ready either.
771
00:48:48,343 --> 00:48:50,845
J? This life has shown me J3
772
00:48:50,929 --> 00:48:53,723
X1 How we're mended
and how we're tom D
773
00:48:53,806 --> 00:48:55,308
DD
774
00:48:55,391 --> 00:48:57,352
J3 How it's okay
to be lonely J3
775
00:48:57,435 --> 00:49:01,773
J3 As long
as you're free J3
776
00:49:01,856 --> 00:49:05,193
But' sometimes
my ground was stony
777
00:49:05,276 --> 00:49:08,821
And sometimes
co ve/'ed up with thorns
778
00:49:08,905 --> 00:49:15,453
J3 Only you could make it
what it had to be J3
779
00:49:15,495 --> 00:49:17,038
DD
780
00:49:17,121 --> 00:49:18,998
J3 If they dressed me
like a pauper J3
781
00:49:19,082 --> 00:49:23,127
J3 Or if they dined me
like a prince J3
782
00:49:23,169 --> 00:49:25,880
J3 If they lay me
with my fathers J3
783
00:49:25,964 --> 00:49:30,051
J3 Or with my ashes scattered
on the wind I don't care J?
784
00:49:30,134 --> 00:49:35,848
J3 Because when I leave
I want to go out
like Elijah J3
785
00:49:35,932 --> 00:49:42,814
J7 With a whirlwind
to fuel my chariot of fire J3
786
00:49:42,897 --> 00:49:46,109
J3 And when I look
back on the stars J3
787
00:49:46,192 --> 00:49:50,071
J3 It'll be
like a candle light
in Central Park J?
788
00:49:50,154 --> 00:49:52,365
DD
789
00:49:52,448 --> 00:49:56,828
J3 It won't break
my heart to say goodbye J3
790
00:49:56,869 --> 00:49:59,414
DD
791
00:50:11,592 --> 00:50:13,428
He seems ready to me.
792
00:50:18,641 --> 00:50:20,560
Rich, oft?
Eventually, the label
gave me a shot'
793
00:50:20,643 --> 00:50:23,271
and they signed me
to a pretty modest contract
794
00:50:23,354 --> 00:50:25,356
After a few months,
I finished my first album
795
00:50:25,440 --> 00:50:28,568
called, we//,
Rich Mullins.
796
00:50:30,737 --> 00:50:32,238
After that,
I went on tour with Amy
797
00:50:32,321 --> 00:50:33,823
and opened
at her concerts.
798
00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:39,037
I found
that being on the road
799
00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:41,539
was much more enjoyable
than being in the studio.
800
00:50:41,622 --> 00:50:44,959
Maybe it's because I didn't'
like Nashville very much,
I den '2' know.
801
00:50:45,043 --> 00:50:47,712
Music was always
something that was
a pan' of me,
802
00:50:47,754 --> 00:50:50,089
something I
needed to share.
803
00:50:50,173 --> 00:50:52,383
Now I
was reaching so many people
every night', if was exciting,
804
00:50:52,467 --> 00:50:56,596
despite all
the corporate politics
that went with it.
805
00:50:56,679 --> 00:50:59,807
But it's funny
how you can meet hundreds
of new people every day.
806
00:50:59,891 --> 00:51:01,642
Thank you, thank you.
807
00:51:01,726 --> 00:51:03,478
And still feel
almost completely alone.
808
00:51:03,561 --> 00:51:05,313
Thank you all
so much.
809
00:51:05,396 --> 00:51:07,023
We're going to take
a real quick break now
810
00:51:07,106 --> 00:51:08,399
and be right back
in a few minutes.
811
00:51:18,659 --> 00:51:20,495
There he is!
812
00:51:20,578 --> 00:51:22,330
Tell us!
Here's our rock star!
813
00:51:22,413 --> 00:51:24,290
She does that so way
better than you, man.
814
00:51:24,373 --> 00:51:26,000
Yeah, she's
really talented.
815
00:51:26,084 --> 00:51:27,585
How are you feeling?
816
00:51:27,668 --> 00:51:29,087
Ah. Okay, let's go,
let's go, let's go.
817
00:51:29,170 --> 00:51:31,172
Who's smoking?
818
00:51:31,255 --> 00:51:35,802
Hey.
Ohhh.
So proud of you.
819
00:51:37,970 --> 00:51:40,098
Wayne.
Hey,Dad.
820
00:51:40,181 --> 00:51:41,808
You look like a girl
with that long hair.
821
00:51:41,891 --> 00:51:43,101
You need
a hair cut, boy.
822
00:51:46,104 --> 00:51:49,315
You haven't seen me
in months and that's
what you have to say?
823
00:51:49,398 --> 00:51:50,775
It's only a joke.
824
00:51:50,817 --> 00:51:52,527
Don't be
so damn sensitive.
825
00:51:52,610 --> 00:51:54,278
I guess piano players
can wear their hair
826
00:51:54,362 --> 00:51:56,948
however they want
these days.
827
00:51:56,989 --> 00:52:00,284
Rich, would you mind
coming back on at the end
and doing the rain thing?
Absolutely.
828
00:52:00,368 --> 00:52:02,703
You've got
a very talented son here.
829
00:52:02,787 --> 00:52:04,372
You must be
a very proud father.
830
00:52:04,455 --> 00:52:06,124
No, I'm proud
of all my kids.
831
00:52:06,165 --> 00:52:07,375
Two boys,
two girls,
832
00:52:07,458 --> 00:52:09,544
and a--piano player.
833
00:52:11,129 --> 00:52:12,130
I got to go.
834
00:52:23,558 --> 00:52:26,227
What we're going to do,
835
00:52:26,310 --> 00:52:28,396
we're going to make rain, okay?
836
00:52:28,479 --> 00:52:30,523
So what I'm going to do
is break you guys up
into three groups.
837
00:52:32,066 --> 00:52:33,317
This one's about here.
838
00:52:35,403 --> 00:52:36,654
Nice.
839
00:53:30,208 --> 00:53:31,876
Come on,
pick up.
840
00:53:33,753 --> 00:53:35,254
Hello?
841
00:53:35,338 --> 00:53:36,797
Jess!
842
00:53:36,881 --> 00:53:38,549
Oh.
It's me.
843
00:53:38,591 --> 00:53:40,468
Hey, Richard.
Sorry I didn't make it.
844
00:53:40,551 --> 00:53:44,222
Oh, no,
that's fine.
845
00:53:44,305 --> 00:53:46,140
Hey, listen,
what are you
doing next weekend?
846
00:53:46,224 --> 00:53:47,642
The tour is coming
through Cincinnati--
847
00:53:47,725 --> 00:53:49,060
Rich, I'm engaged.
848
00:53:51,062 --> 00:53:52,730
I'm sorry.
849
00:53:52,772 --> 00:53:56,150
I just,
I don't know,
I just--
850
00:53:56,234 --> 00:53:57,610
I thought
you should know.
851
00:54:20,174 --> 00:54:25,763
You know,
I'm not a real--
852
00:54:25,846 --> 00:54:28,599
I don't know--
853
00:54:28,641 --> 00:54:32,979
I have no interest
in anybody else.
854
00:54:33,062 --> 00:54:36,816
The woman I'm in love with
is married to someone
else so--
855
00:54:36,899 --> 00:54:39,443
that's the way it--
856
00:54:39,527 --> 00:54:41,779
that's the way it goes,
857
00:54:41,821 --> 00:54:42,822
and I don't mind that.
858
00:54:46,158 --> 00:54:49,954
I think
maybe God wanted me
to be celibate.
859
00:54:50,037 --> 00:54:53,082
The way he accomplished
that was to break
my heart.
860
00:54:54,750 --> 00:54:56,502
So the song
you wrote for your wedding,
861
00:54:56,585 --> 00:55:02,008
Doubly Good,
you gave to Amy Grant. Why?
862
00:55:02,091 --> 00:55:04,552
Some things
you just have
to walk away from,
863
00:55:04,635 --> 00:55:06,220
you know.
864
00:55:06,304 --> 00:55:08,848
And some things
you don't have
a choice.
865
00:55:08,931 --> 00:55:12,643
The woman I love
is married to somebody else.
That's the way it goes.
866
00:55:14,603 --> 00:55:16,480
Well, if that's the case,
then it seems to me
867
00:55:16,564 --> 00:55:19,150
that song
is exceptionally cruel.
868
00:55:19,191 --> 00:55:21,068
Why is that?
869
00:55:21,152 --> 00:55:24,155
Well, because it implies
that if God hasn't given you
870
00:55:24,238 --> 00:55:26,240
a love
that's tender
and someone who's true
871
00:55:26,324 --> 00:55:29,827
then he hasn't been
doubly good to you.
872
00:55:29,869 --> 00:55:32,830
Well, God
doesn't have to be
singly good to any of us.
873
00:55:32,872 --> 00:55:35,666
We all have it better
than we deserve so...
874
00:55:35,708 --> 00:55:37,835
we should be thankful
for what we have.
875
00:57:57,016 --> 00:57:59,351
with more instruments]
876
00:58:04,148 --> 00:58:05,524
It's good.
877
00:58:05,608 --> 00:58:06,817
That's horrible.
878
00:58:06,859 --> 00:58:08,819
I like it.
Bryan?
879
00:58:08,903 --> 00:58:10,404
Maybe if we
just changed--
880
00:58:10,488 --> 00:58:11,697
No, I don't want to--
881
00:58:11,780 --> 00:58:13,157
I don't want to change--
882
00:58:13,199 --> 00:58:15,826
I don't want
to do it at all.
883
00:58:15,910 --> 00:58:19,163
It's exactly this that made
me not want to come
to Nashville.
884
00:58:19,246 --> 00:58:22,249
Yeah, you made
that clear, Mullins.
885
00:58:22,333 --> 00:58:24,710
But no one's holding
a gun to your head here.
886
00:58:24,793 --> 00:58:26,003
We're just trying to help.
887
00:58:26,045 --> 00:58:28,547
Well, you're not helping.
888
00:58:28,631 --> 00:58:31,091
Look, my songs aren't
fill-in-the-blanks,
you guys.
889
00:58:31,175 --> 00:58:33,844
You can't just put the word
-Jesus- in a few more times
and expect it to be better.
890
00:58:33,928 --> 00:58:36,680
Rich, you already have
a lot of longing
and brokenness
891
00:58:36,722 --> 00:58:38,390
in your other songs,
which is good.
892
00:58:38,474 --> 00:58:40,726
Maybe if you
just had happier lyrics.
893
00:58:40,809 --> 00:58:43,229
I'm not trying to be
a Christian pop star, guys.
894
00:58:43,312 --> 00:58:46,106
I'm just trying to say
something true.
Okay?
895
00:58:46,190 --> 00:58:48,526
I don't want to change
my music.
896
00:58:48,609 --> 00:58:52,571
Yeah? Well,
things change.
897
00:58:52,655 --> 00:58:56,116
You sure don't seem
to mind the new car,
898
00:58:56,200 --> 00:58:58,285
the new house, right?
899
00:58:58,369 --> 00:59:00,371
Don't mess with my songs.
900
00:59:00,412 --> 00:59:02,540
Rich, we don't want to mess
with your songs, okay?
901
00:59:02,623 --> 00:59:05,125
But in order for people
to hear your music,
902
00:59:05,209 --> 00:59:06,710
we have to sell records.
903
00:59:06,794 --> 00:59:08,587
And in order
to sell records,
904
00:59:08,671 --> 00:59:10,548
we have to get
the sound right.
Yeah!
905
00:59:10,631 --> 00:59:12,550
The problem is the sound.
The problem is me.
I got it.
906
00:59:12,633 --> 00:59:14,426
I get it.
907
00:59:14,510 --> 00:59:16,887
What are
you doing?
908
00:59:16,929 --> 00:59:19,306
You can't leave,
we're in the middle
of a session!
909
00:59:19,390 --> 00:59:24,603
You don't want to hear
anything I have to say
to you right now.
910
00:59:24,687 --> 00:59:27,940
He's never going
to sing this song.
911
00:59:28,023 --> 00:59:29,775
Well, if he
doesn't sing this one,
912
00:59:29,858 --> 00:59:31,485
he's going to have to come
up with something else.
913
00:59:31,569 --> 00:59:33,404
We still got
one more slot to fill.
914
00:59:39,827 --> 00:59:43,289
You know,
he has more talent
than anyone I've ever seen.
915
00:59:46,375 --> 00:59:49,920
What if he never gets
off the ground?
916
01:00:09,231 --> 01:00:10,733
Hello?
917
01:00:10,816 --> 01:00:12,067
Hey, Rich.
918
01:00:12,151 --> 01:00:13,902
Hey, Gary.
What's up, man?
919
01:00:13,986 --> 01:00:15,529
I know you're slammed,
but I got a friend
920
01:00:15,613 --> 01:00:17,197
who's asking
for a favor.
921
01:00:17,281 --> 01:00:19,199
Would you have
time to do a show?
922
01:00:19,283 --> 01:00:21,285
Man, I don't know.
We're kind of behind
on this thing.
923
01:00:21,368 --> 01:00:23,287
Thelabers
all over
me about it.
924
01:00:23,370 --> 01:00:26,040
It's on a Native
American reservation.
Really?
925
01:00:26,123 --> 01:00:28,000
Yeah, but it's
all the way out
in Arizona.
926
01:00:28,083 --> 01:00:31,462
It's, like,
a million miles
from Nashville.
927
01:00:31,545 --> 01:00:34,882
I know
you're super busy
working on the new album.
928
01:00:34,965 --> 01:00:36,383
Yeah, I'll do it.
929
01:00:46,518 --> 01:00:48,896
Truth was I couldn't
get away fast enough.
930
01:00:48,979 --> 01:00:50,898
I probably would have done
a retreat on the moon
931
01:00:50,981 --> 01:00:54,318
if it meant getting space
from the record company.
932
01:00:54,360 --> 01:00:56,111
The only thing I knew
about the reservation
933
01:00:56,195 --> 01:00:57,946
was that it
was called Window Rock
934
01:00:58,030 --> 01:00:59,657
and it was
in the middle
of nowhere.
935
01:00:59,740 --> 01:01:02,034
I really had no idea
what to expect.
936
01:01:11,752 --> 01:01:13,337
Driving through
the reservation
937
01:01:13,379 --> 01:01:15,506
was like being
in another world.
938
01:01:15,547 --> 01:01:20,177
It was beautiful there,
but sad at the same time.
939
01:01:21,929 --> 01:01:25,516
Children played
in rundown streets.
940
01:01:25,557 --> 01:01:27,351
Some people
barely left
their homes at all.
941
01:01:36,193 --> 01:01:37,528
There's need here.
942
01:01:40,698 --> 01:01:41,865
Great need.
943
01:01:46,120 --> 01:01:47,788
I ended up staying
a few days here
944
01:01:47,871 --> 01:01:51,291
working with
the Youth Ministry team.
945
01:01:51,375 --> 01:01:54,378
I was able to get
to know some of the kids
and hear their stories.
946
01:01:54,420 --> 01:01:55,879
The good and the bad.
947
01:01:58,549 --> 01:02:02,720
It was one of the most
real experiences
in my life.
948
01:02:02,803 --> 01:02:04,555
I didn't want it to end.
949
01:02:07,266 --> 01:02:09,143
Lights out
in ten minutes.
950
01:02:12,312 --> 01:02:13,439
Hey, Rich.
951
01:02:13,522 --> 01:02:14,815
How's it going, man?
952
01:02:14,898 --> 01:02:16,400
I really like
your shirt.
953
01:02:16,483 --> 01:02:18,902
Oh, thanks.
Yeah, I love this one.
954
01:02:18,986 --> 01:02:20,279
You know what?
955
01:02:20,362 --> 01:02:22,281
It looks like
it'd fit you.
956
01:02:22,364 --> 01:02:23,741
Thanks.
957
01:02:23,782 --> 01:02:25,033
Yeah, man.
958
01:02:27,244 --> 01:02:28,954
Here you go.
It's yours.
959
01:02:29,037 --> 01:02:31,749
Hey.
Can I talk to you?
960
01:02:31,832 --> 01:02:34,126
Yeah. Sure. Sit.
961
01:02:34,209 --> 01:02:36,170
I could tell
as soon as we sat down
962
01:02:36,253 --> 01:02:39,465
that this kid had
something he needed
to share.
963
01:02:39,548 --> 01:02:41,884
We got to talking
and he told me
964
01:02:41,967 --> 01:02:46,180
about how six months earlier
he had shot himself
in the stomach.
965
01:02:46,263 --> 01:02:49,475
We talked late into the night
about depression and despair
966
01:02:49,558 --> 01:02:51,477
and how he thought
he had nothing
to hope for,
967
01:02:51,560 --> 01:02:55,606
until he got so desperate
he tried to kill himself.
968
01:02:55,647 --> 01:02:59,401
And then the humiliation
of failing even at that.
969
01:02:59,485 --> 01:03:02,613
I tried my hardest
to find the words to be
of some comfort to him
970
01:03:02,696 --> 01:03:05,699
to let him know
he wasn '2' alone.
971
01:03:05,783 --> 01:03:09,036
Eventually I was able
to write them down.
972
01:03:09,119 --> 01:03:14,500
J3 Clung to a ball
that was hung in the sky J3
973
01:03:14,583 --> 01:03:16,126
J7 Hurled into orbit J7
974
01:03:16,210 --> 01:03:21,340
L' There you are L'
975
01:03:21,423 --> 01:03:23,467
DD
976
01:03:23,550 --> 01:03:26,970
Whether you fall down
or whether you fly
977
01:03:27,012 --> 01:03:29,014
DD
978
01:03:29,097 --> 01:03:34,645
.0 Seems you
can never gel too far .U
979
01:03:34,686 --> 01:03:39,900
DD
980
01:03:39,983 --> 01:03:46,240
J3 Someone's waiting
to grow wings J3
981
01:03:47,825 --> 01:03:50,828
L' Upon your flightless heart L'
982
01:03:50,869 --> 01:03:54,581
DD
983
01:03:54,665 --> 01:03:57,501
You're on the verge
of a miracle
984
01:03:57,543 --> 01:04:01,380
Standing there
ohhh
985
01:04:01,463 --> 01:04:03,507
You're on the verge
of a miracle
986
01:04:03,549 --> 01:04:05,259
You know,
987
01:04:05,342 --> 01:04:06,927
this might keep him
around a little
bit longer.
988
01:04:07,010 --> 01:04:08,762
--be/ie we in--
989
01:04:08,846 --> 01:04:12,349
Maybe.
Open your eyes
and see
990
01:04:12,432 --> 01:04:15,185
He's living
on borrowed time, man.
You're on the verge
of a miracle
991
01:04:15,269 --> 01:04:20,899
??
992
01:04:20,983 --> 01:04:28,115
The love
that seemed so far away
993
01:04:28,198 --> 01:04:35,581
L' Is standing very near L'
994
01:04:35,664 --> 01:04:38,876
You're on the verge
of a miracle
995
01:04:38,959 --> 01:04:42,546
Standing there
Oh
996
01:04:42,629 --> 01:04:45,257
J3 You're on the verge
of a miracle J3
997
01:04:45,340 --> 01:04:49,636
J3 Just waiting
to be believed in J?
998
01:04:49,720 --> 01:04:53,932
L' Open your eyes and see L'
999
01:04:54,016 --> 01:04:57,769
J You're on the verge
of a miracle
1000
01:04:57,853 --> 01:05:02,065
DD
1001
01:05:11,533 --> 01:05:13,619
What is that?
Is that new?
1002
01:05:13,702 --> 01:05:15,913
Yeah, it's something
new I've been kind of
playing around with
1003
01:05:15,954 --> 01:05:18,749
but so far
no lyrics.
1004
01:05:18,790 --> 01:05:20,334
I like it.
1005
01:05:20,417 --> 01:05:22,169
Yeah, it's cool.
1006
01:05:22,252 --> 01:05:24,755
This is what I like
about being on the road, man.
1007
01:05:24,838 --> 01:05:28,300
I mean,
for all the things I hate,
this is what I love.
1008
01:05:28,383 --> 01:05:29,843
Having you here,
on the open road,
1009
01:05:29,927 --> 01:05:31,678
look at the sky,
1010
01:05:31,762 --> 01:05:32,679
I mean, it's just--
1011
01:05:32,763 --> 01:05:34,348
Awesome.
1012
01:06:04,002 --> 01:06:05,295
Morning, Rich.
1013
01:06:05,379 --> 01:06:07,214
Bryan.
1014
01:06:07,297 --> 01:06:09,132
How was
your retreat?
1015
01:06:09,216 --> 01:06:10,467
Don't start.
I said I was
going to go.
1016
01:06:10,550 --> 01:06:12,094
What am I
supposed to do?
1017
01:06:12,177 --> 01:06:13,470
Don't walk
away from me.
1018
01:06:13,553 --> 01:06:15,180
Rich!
1019
01:06:15,263 --> 01:06:17,099
That's what you said
about that one retreat.
1020
01:06:17,182 --> 01:06:19,643
But every other week
it's something else.
1021
01:06:19,685 --> 01:06:21,186
A retreat,
a camp,
1022
01:06:21,269 --> 01:06:23,063
a small church
in Michigan--
1023
01:06:23,146 --> 01:06:25,148
You're a recording
artist now, Rich,
1024
01:06:25,232 --> 01:06:27,317
you don't have
take time to--
What do you
want me to do?
1025
01:06:27,401 --> 01:06:29,861
I want you in my office,
that's what I want.
1026
01:06:31,321 --> 01:06:32,531
Sit down.
1027
01:06:32,614 --> 01:06:34,032
No, I'm good.
1028
01:06:34,116 --> 01:06:35,826
Yeah, you're good.
1029
01:06:35,909 --> 01:06:37,995
Well, you're not
as good as you
think, Rich.
1030
01:06:38,078 --> 01:06:40,205
All this talking
you've been doing
at your concerts,
1031
01:06:40,288 --> 01:06:42,833
that's got to stop!
Okay?
1032
01:06:42,874 --> 01:06:45,961
People are paying
to hear you sing,
not to hear you talk.
1033
01:06:46,044 --> 01:06:47,170
You understand that?
1034
01:06:47,254 --> 01:06:48,839
No, no.
No.
1035
01:06:48,922 --> 01:06:50,590
You're there
to make fans,
not enemies.
1036
01:06:50,674 --> 01:06:52,259
What can I say?
That's what happens
1037
01:06:52,342 --> 01:06:54,136
when you're honest
with religious people.
1038
01:06:54,219 --> 01:06:56,263
Well, those
religious people
are paying your bills
1039
01:06:56,346 --> 01:06:58,849
and they're not going to keep
buying your records
if you keep--
1040
01:06:58,890 --> 01:07:00,392
Pissing them off?
1041
01:07:00,475 --> 01:07:03,687
Are we done?
1042
01:07:03,729 --> 01:07:06,898
No.
1043
01:07:06,982 --> 01:07:09,901
Look, we've got
a record to put out
1044
01:07:09,985 --> 01:07:11,361
and the last one
still isn't selling.
1045
01:07:11,403 --> 01:07:13,363
Do you--?
1046
01:07:13,405 --> 01:07:16,074
You understand
that, right?
1047
01:07:16,158 --> 01:07:17,409
I thought
it was selling.
1048
01:07:17,492 --> 01:07:19,202
Not as much
as we'd hoped.
1049
01:07:19,286 --> 01:07:21,204
What do you
want me to do?
1050
01:07:21,288 --> 01:07:24,624
Your contract is
up after this, Rich.
1051
01:07:24,708 --> 01:07:27,711
If your records
don't start selling,
1052
01:07:27,794 --> 01:07:29,379
it's over.
1053
01:07:29,421 --> 01:07:31,339
You think I give
a damn about that?
1054
01:07:36,178 --> 01:07:38,221
No, I don't.
1055
01:07:41,892 --> 01:07:45,395
It's disrespectful.
1056
01:07:45,437 --> 01:07:47,814
It's disrespectful to me,
1057
01:07:47,898 --> 01:07:49,232
this label,
1058
01:07:49,274 --> 01:07:51,568
more importantly, Rich,
1059
01:07:51,651 --> 01:07:53,320
it's disrespectful to God
1060
01:07:53,403 --> 01:07:54,738
who gave you
all of this ability
1061
01:07:54,821 --> 01:07:58,075
and all
of this opportunity.
1062
01:07:58,158 --> 01:08:02,662
You think
you're so
righteous, huh?
1063
01:08:02,746 --> 01:08:06,166
Now you try to throw
everything away
1064
01:08:06,249 --> 01:08:08,001
because you have
some idea about holiness
1065
01:08:08,085 --> 01:08:10,087
but you want to know
what I think?
Hm.
1066
01:08:10,170 --> 01:08:11,838
Oh, yeah, you
keep laughing,
you keep laughing.
1067
01:08:11,922 --> 01:08:14,424
You know what I think?
I think you're scared.
1068
01:08:18,011 --> 01:08:21,932
Time's running
out, Rich.
1069
01:08:22,015 --> 01:08:24,226
God might wait for you,
but this label won't.
1070
01:08:29,606 --> 01:08:32,567
And don't
ever disrespect
me like that again.
1071
01:08:50,460 --> 01:08:52,295
What do you want from me?
1072
01:09:19,531 --> 01:09:21,366
What's that?
1073
01:09:38,675 --> 01:09:42,846
Rich Mullins
is mowing our lawn.
1074
01:09:42,888 --> 01:09:44,347
Oh.
1075
01:09:49,352 --> 01:09:50,770
Honey?
1076
01:09:50,854 --> 01:09:52,522
Yeah?
1077
01:09:52,564 --> 01:09:55,400
Why is Rich Mullins
mowing our lawn?
1078
01:10:00,322 --> 01:10:02,699
To say
he's sorry.
1079
01:10:02,741 --> 01:10:04,034
Hm.
1080
01:10:34,731 --> 01:10:38,068
J Our God,
our God is an awesome God J
1081
01:10:38,151 --> 01:10:41,821
J He reigns
from heaven above
1082
01:10:41,905 --> 01:10:44,908
J3 With wisdom,
power, and love J7
1083
01:10:44,950 --> 01:10:48,578
J Our God
is an awesome God J
1084
01:10:50,747 --> 01:10:53,500
You're on
the radio!
1085
01:10:53,583 --> 01:10:56,795
I know.
1086
01:10:56,878 --> 01:10:58,463
I knew
you were special.
1087
01:11:00,006 --> 01:11:02,008
Hurry UP!
1088
01:11:02,092 --> 01:11:03,635
I don't even care
if we're late.
1089
01:11:03,718 --> 01:11:04,678
I just want
to hang out
with you guys.
1090
01:11:04,761 --> 01:11:06,846
See this?
1091
01:11:06,930 --> 01:11:08,056
Uh-huh.
1092
01:11:08,139 --> 01:11:09,057
It's really nice, man.
1093
01:11:09,140 --> 01:11:10,684
How's Morris?
1094
01:11:10,767 --> 01:11:13,520
Oh. Well, you
should live
in Wichita.
1095
01:11:13,603 --> 01:11:15,355
He's retired now.
1096
01:11:15,438 --> 01:11:16,982
You can hang
out with him
as much as you want.
1097
01:11:17,065 --> 01:11:18,358
That'd be
awesome, yeah.
1098
01:11:20,360 --> 01:11:21,653
Are you doing okay?
1099
01:11:23,154 --> 01:11:24,364
No.
1100
01:11:24,447 --> 01:11:25,991
What's up?
1101
01:11:26,074 --> 01:11:29,327
I've been drinking a lot.
1102
01:11:29,411 --> 01:11:31,621
I hate myself for it.
I really do.
1103
01:11:31,663 --> 01:11:33,707
Don't do that.
1104
01:11:33,790 --> 01:11:35,125
The drinking?
1105
01:11:35,166 --> 01:11:37,377
No, the hating.
1106
01:11:37,460 --> 01:11:40,463
You know what?
You should probably
figure out the drinking, too.
1107
01:11:40,547 --> 01:11:42,465
Yeah.
1108
01:11:42,549 --> 01:11:45,135
He's on more than one
radio station at
the same time!
1109
01:11:46,636 --> 01:11:48,596
You guys,
seriously hurry up!
1110
01:11:48,680 --> 01:11:50,348
Dude, I can't believe
you kept this in a desk
for so long.
1111
01:11:52,142 --> 01:11:53,643
You could've had
this hit big
a year ago.
1112
01:11:53,685 --> 01:11:55,395
Don't get me wrong,
I'm excited.
1113
01:11:55,478 --> 01:11:58,815
I just don't think
I can handle this.
1114
01:11:58,898 --> 01:12:01,818
We got a long
road ahead of us.
1115
01:12:01,901 --> 01:12:03,320
Let's go!
1116
01:12:03,403 --> 01:12:05,488
We're here, guys.
1117
01:12:05,572 --> 01:12:07,657
I wonder if you'll have
a big crowd tonight.
1118
01:12:12,203 --> 01:12:14,289
I think yes.
1119
01:12:14,372 --> 01:12:15,749
What?
1120
01:12:15,832 --> 01:12:17,334
Don't blow it.
1121
01:12:17,375 --> 01:12:21,254
Ohhh, you guys-'
1122
01:12:29,679 --> 01:12:31,431
Ow!
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
1123
01:12:31,514 --> 01:12:33,641
You people
cannot be back here
without a ticket.
1124
01:12:33,725 --> 01:12:35,560
No, no,
I'm Rich.
1125
01:12:35,643 --> 01:12:36,770
I don't care
how much money
you got. Buy a ticket.
1126
01:12:36,853 --> 01:12:38,021
No, he's the singer!
1127
01:12:38,063 --> 01:12:39,856
Oh! Oh!
1128
01:12:39,898 --> 01:12:41,858
No problem!
Go ahead,
go ahead.
Thanks, man.
1129
01:12:41,941 --> 01:12:43,860
Hey, just
so you know it,
you hurt me.
1130
01:12:43,902 --> 01:12:46,029
Why don't you
just man up?
1131
01:12:46,071 --> 01:12:48,281
No, my feelings.
1132
01:12:48,365 --> 01:12:50,450
Ladies and gentlemen,
1133
01:12:50,533 --> 01:12:53,703
please welcome
Rich Mullins!
1134
01:13:00,043 --> 01:13:02,379
Welcome to being famous.
1135
01:13:21,898 --> 01:13:23,900
Hi, I'm Rich Mullins.
1136
01:13:23,942 --> 01:13:25,276
DD
1137
01:13:25,360 --> 01:13:26,403
Now let's get this
over with.
1138
01:13:26,444 --> 01:13:27,821
DD
1139
01:13:27,904 --> 01:13:31,574
B Our God 'vs an awesome God D
1140
01:13:31,616 --> 01:13:34,411
J3 He reigns from heaven above J3
1141
01:13:34,452 --> 01:13:38,331
J3 With wisdom,
power, and love J3
1142
01:13:38,415 --> 01:13:41,251
B Our God 'vs an awesome God D
1143
01:13:41,334 --> 01:13:44,838
67 Our God is an awesome God
1144
01:13:44,921 --> 01:13:48,425
J He reigns
from heaven above
1145
01:13:48,508 --> 01:13:52,262
J3 With wisdom,
power, and love J3
1146
01:13:52,345 --> 01:13:56,808
B Our God 'vs an awesome God DD
1147
01:13:56,891 --> 01:14:00,103
You know,
I've come to think
1148
01:14:00,145 --> 01:14:03,606
that to identify
fully with Christ,
1149
01:14:03,648 --> 01:14:07,193
who I claim to be
my Saviour and my Lord,
1150
01:14:07,277 --> 01:14:13,283
that to fully identify with Him
is to identify with the poor.
1151
01:14:13,366 --> 01:14:16,870
Christianity is not about
finding an absolutely secure
niche in the world
1152
01:14:16,953 --> 01:14:19,038
where you can live
with your perfect little wife
1153
01:14:19,122 --> 01:14:21,374
and your perfect little kids
in your beautiful little house
1154
01:14:21,458 --> 01:14:26,004
where there are no gays
or minority groups around.
1155
01:14:26,087 --> 01:14:31,634
Christianity is
about learning
how to love like Jesus
1156
01:14:31,676 --> 01:14:33,887
and Jesus loved the poor
and Jesus loved the broken.
1157
01:14:37,307 --> 01:14:40,310
I knew that not everyone
appreciated what I had to say.
1158
01:14:40,351 --> 01:14:43,146
But I didn't really care.
1159
01:14:43,229 --> 01:14:45,231
Awesome God
became the number one song
1160
01:14:45,315 --> 01:14:48,318
in Christian radio
the week it released
in 1988
1161
01:14:48,359 --> 01:14:50,820
or so they told me.
1162
01:14:50,904 --> 01:14:52,405
So the concert
venues got bigger,
1163
01:14:52,489 --> 01:14:54,741
the crowds got louder,
1164
01:14:54,824 --> 01:14:58,036
Man' and Bryan were
a little biz' nicer
to me.
1165
01:14:58,119 --> 01:15:00,079
But at the end of the day,
1166
01:15:00,163 --> 01:15:01,748
I mean,
the fame, the money,
the attention,
1167
01:15:01,831 --> 01:15:03,750
it just didn't
mean much to me.
1168
01:15:06,336 --> 01:15:08,880
In fact, I got sick
of it pretty fast.
1169
01:15:31,402 --> 01:15:35,240
Life on the road
had taken its toll on me.
1170
01:15:35,323 --> 01:15:38,952
One thing became
painfully obvious.
1171
01:15:39,035 --> 01:15:40,578
I needed a change.
1172
01:15:47,210 --> 01:15:50,046
Look, here
he comes, hey, hey.
1173
01:15:50,129 --> 01:15:52,966
Yes!
There he is!
Man of the hour!
1174
01:15:53,049 --> 01:15:55,385
Yeah, I bet you thought
this day would never
come, huh?
1175
01:15:55,468 --> 01:15:57,637
Hoped it would
never come, actually.
1176
01:15:57,720 --> 01:15:59,472
We got some great news.
1177
01:15:59,556 --> 01:16:01,474
We got you booked
solid for the next
six months.
1178
01:16:01,558 --> 01:16:03,643
No more little church gigs
or youth camps.
1179
01:16:03,726 --> 01:16:05,770
And you're no longer
an opening act, Rich.
1180
01:16:05,853 --> 01:16:07,897
From now on, this town's
going to be begging
to open for you.
1181
01:16:07,981 --> 01:16:10,233
Not only that.
You can finally afford
a proper tour bus.
1182
01:16:10,316 --> 01:16:11,859
Yeah, you're
ready, Rich.
1183
01:16:11,943 --> 01:16:14,112
Everything is changed.
Yeah.
1184
01:16:16,406 --> 01:16:17,907
I'm moving to Wichita.
1185
01:16:20,201 --> 01:16:22,078
Yeah, okay, Rich.
1186
01:16:22,161 --> 01:16:23,997
No, I'm serious.
I'm moving to Wichita.
1187
01:16:26,791 --> 01:16:30,378
But you're finally on top.
1188
01:16:30,461 --> 01:16:33,089
If you leave now,
you risk losing everything.
1189
01:16:33,131 --> 01:16:37,677
I don't know
if I'm concerned
about it either way.
1190
01:16:37,760 --> 01:16:41,180
Look, I've seen you.
I know you like
those new toys.
1191
01:16:41,264 --> 01:16:44,434
I just saw you
on that new
motorcycle, right? Huh?
1192
01:16:45,685 --> 01:16:47,520
Rich, come on.
1193
01:16:47,604 --> 01:16:49,272
You know
what the problem is?
1194
01:16:49,355 --> 01:16:52,859
I hadn't seen myself
on that new motorcycle.
1195
01:16:52,942 --> 01:16:54,777
Here, you guys
can have it.
1196
01:16:54,861 --> 01:16:56,070
I don't even want it.
1197
01:16:57,655 --> 01:16:59,073
Rich!
1198
01:17:06,831 --> 01:17:09,125
You know what a person is
that doesn't want anything
1199
01:17:09,208 --> 01:17:11,961
and doesn't fear anybody?
1200
01:17:12,045 --> 01:17:15,131
What?
1201
01:17:15,214 --> 01:17:16,966
Dangerous.
1202
01:17:25,975 --> 01:17:27,644
Rich?
1203
01:17:27,685 --> 01:17:28,645
Can I help you?
1204
01:17:28,728 --> 01:17:31,189
Um, I'm Justin.
1205
01:17:31,272 --> 01:17:34,150
Holy cow!
Good to see
you, man!
1206
01:17:34,192 --> 01:17:35,652
It's been a while.
1207
01:17:35,735 --> 01:17:37,528
You remember me?
Yeah, absolutely.
1208
01:17:37,612 --> 01:17:39,405
I hope you don't mind
I got--
No, not at all.
1209
01:17:39,489 --> 01:17:41,115
You kind of picked
the worst possible time.
1210
01:17:41,199 --> 01:17:42,659
I'm literally
just getting
ready to leave
1211
01:17:42,742 --> 01:17:44,160
but if you need
a place to crash
1212
01:17:44,202 --> 01:17:45,870
you know, it's yours.
1213
01:17:45,953 --> 01:17:47,330
Where are you going?
1214
01:17:47,413 --> 01:17:49,666
I'm moving
to Wichita, actually.
1215
01:17:49,707 --> 01:17:51,417
Oh.
1216
01:17:51,501 --> 01:17:53,378
What are you doing
in Nashville anyway?
1217
01:17:53,461 --> 01:17:56,547
Looking for a job.
1218
01:17:56,631 --> 01:18:00,218
I'll tell you what,
if you want a crappy job,
you can come join the band.
Really?
1219
01:18:00,301 --> 01:18:02,095
Yeah. Sure,
why not?
1220
01:18:02,178 --> 01:18:04,013
You're just going
to let me join
the band?
Yeah!
1221
01:18:04,055 --> 01:18:05,765
Awesome.
Come in.
1222
01:18:05,848 --> 01:18:07,350
Let's get
this crappy job started.
1223
01:18:07,433 --> 01:18:08,768
Here, take that
to the jeep, will you?
1224
01:18:12,939 --> 01:18:14,857
It turns out Justin
is just as broken as I was
1225
01:18:14,899 --> 01:18:17,860
when he landed
on my doorstep.
1226
01:18:17,902 --> 01:18:20,196
That was one
of the many things
we had in common.
1227
01:18:20,238 --> 01:18:23,449
Along with enjoying
Aaron Copeland
and road trips
1228
01:18:23,533 --> 01:18:25,118
broken relationships
with our fathers,
1229
01:18:25,201 --> 01:18:27,120
and greasy truck stop food,
1230
01:18:27,203 --> 01:18:29,122
stale motel lobby coffee,
1231
01:18:29,205 --> 01:18:31,374
it goes on and on.
1232
01:18:31,457 --> 01:18:33,543
And more than anything,
1233
01:18:33,626 --> 01:18:35,294
if was just' nice
to have a friend
on the road.
1234
01:18:35,378 --> 01:18:37,296
So what?
You want to be
like Saint Frank?
1235
01:18:37,380 --> 01:18:41,926
It's not about being
like Saint Francis
necessarily,
1236
01:18:42,009 --> 01:18:43,386
it's about following Jesus,
1237
01:18:43,469 --> 01:18:44,804
it's about being
like Christ.
1238
01:18:44,887 --> 01:18:47,390
I mean,
how do you do that?
1239
01:18:47,432 --> 01:18:48,891
I'm not good
at being perfect.
1240
01:18:48,975 --> 01:18:51,894
But it's
not about being perfect.
1241
01:18:51,978 --> 01:18:53,980
Look at Saint Francis.
1242
01:18:54,063 --> 01:18:55,815
He took vows.
He took a vow of chastity,
1243
01:18:55,898 --> 01:18:58,109
he took a vow of poverty,
1244
01:18:58,192 --> 01:18:59,736
a vow of obedience.
1245
01:18:59,819 --> 01:19:01,738
I think that's what
we're really missing.
1246
01:19:01,821 --> 01:19:05,825
That's what I want to do.
1247
01:19:05,908 --> 01:19:07,493
I think
I want to start living
1248
01:19:07,577 --> 01:19:09,412
on whatever
the average American salary is.
1249
01:19:09,454 --> 01:19:12,248
Whatever the average
American worker makes.
1250
01:19:12,331 --> 01:19:14,083
Says the man
making millions.
1251
01:19:14,167 --> 01:19:16,252
Who cares?
1252
01:19:16,335 --> 01:19:18,963
Money destroys
people, man.
1253
01:19:19,046 --> 01:19:20,965
Money doesn't have
to destroy people.
1254
01:19:23,926 --> 01:19:25,344
Well, it's destroying me.
1255
01:19:34,020 --> 01:19:36,022
You moved
to Wichita, Kansas
1256
01:19:36,105 --> 01:19:39,108
to go back to college
at Friends University
1257
01:19:39,150 --> 01:19:41,027
and do I have this right
1258
01:19:41,110 --> 01:19:43,321
that you went to get
a music education degree?
1259
01:19:43,404 --> 01:19:45,114
No, I mean, yeah.
1260
01:19:45,198 --> 01:19:46,949
It's true that I went
to get a music degree.
1261
01:19:46,991 --> 01:19:49,118
I wanted
to be able to teach kids
1262
01:19:49,202 --> 01:19:51,621
but the real reason
I went back to Wichita
was Morris.
1263
01:19:57,543 --> 01:20:03,341
I thought maybe being
around him may make me
walk a little straighter.
1264
01:20:03,424 --> 01:20:05,176
To be honest,
it's the closest
thing to home
1265
01:20:05,259 --> 01:20:06,928
I've found
in a long, long time.
1266
01:20:29,492 --> 01:20:30,535
What' up, man?
I'm Rich.
1267
01:20:30,618 --> 01:20:32,203
Hey, I'm Mitch.
1268
01:20:32,286 --> 01:20:33,329
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
1269
01:20:33,371 --> 01:20:34,831
Nice guitar.
1270
01:20:34,914 --> 01:20:36,582
Yeah.
Thanks.
1271
01:20:36,666 --> 01:20:37,667
I'm just starting out.
1272
01:20:37,750 --> 01:20:39,335
Sweet.
1273
01:20:39,418 --> 01:20:41,379
This is James
Bryan Smith's class, right?
1274
01:20:41,462 --> 01:20:43,506
Yeah. What,
you weren't
here last week?
1275
01:20:43,548 --> 01:20:45,341
No, no,
I was bummed.
I had to miss it.
1276
01:20:45,383 --> 01:20:47,718
I was
actually in Ireland.
1277
01:20:47,802 --> 01:20:51,180
And Ireland's incredible so
I wasn't really that bummed
to be honest but--
1278
01:20:51,264 --> 01:20:54,559
Yeah. You're seeing
friends, family?
1279
01:20:54,642 --> 01:20:57,854
Actually I was shooting
a music video.
1280
01:20:57,937 --> 01:20:59,981
It's not as cool
as it seems.
1281
01:21:00,064 --> 01:21:01,691
Hey, everyone.
1282
01:21:01,774 --> 01:21:05,444
Glad to see
you all made
it back to class.
1283
01:21:05,528 --> 01:21:07,113
Can I help you?
1284
01:21:07,196 --> 01:21:10,366
This is Intro
to Religion, right?
Yes.
1285
01:21:10,408 --> 01:21:12,410
What's your name?
Do you have
a student ID?
1286
01:21:12,493 --> 01:21:14,036
Uh, my name
is Rich Mullins.
1287
01:21:14,120 --> 01:21:16,873
I'm not sure
about the student ID.
1288
01:21:16,956 --> 01:21:18,374
The Rich Mullins?
1289
01:21:18,457 --> 01:21:19,959
Awesome God guy.
1290
01:21:20,042 --> 01:21:21,961
I do have
other songs.
1291
01:21:22,044 --> 01:21:24,463
All right, and you're
taking this class?
1292
01:21:24,547 --> 01:21:26,215
Yeah.
1293
01:21:26,299 --> 01:21:28,134
Why?
1294
01:21:28,217 --> 01:21:29,844
I was hoping
you would tell me
that part.
1295
01:21:29,927 --> 01:21:31,721
Yeah, okay, sorry.
1296
01:21:31,804 --> 01:21:34,056
Glad to have you, Rich.
1297
01:21:34,140 --> 01:21:38,269
Everyone, take out
your copies of G.K.
Chesterton's Orthodoxy.
1298
01:21:55,786 --> 01:21:57,413
Good morning.
1299
01:21:57,455 --> 01:21:59,916
Yes, it is.
Barely.
1300
01:22:01,918 --> 01:22:03,753
I think this
is the earliest
I've seen you, man.
1301
01:22:03,836 --> 01:22:05,338
Good job.
1302
01:22:05,421 --> 01:22:08,007
That's funny.
Justin up?
1303
01:22:08,090 --> 01:22:09,926
Well, I haven't seen him
down by the coffee pot
1304
01:22:10,009 --> 01:22:13,137
so chances are
he's not up yet.
1305
01:22:13,220 --> 01:22:14,931
Sam called.
Oh, yeah?
1306
01:22:15,014 --> 01:22:16,974
Said hi, yeah.
1307
01:22:17,058 --> 01:22:19,602
Does he, uh,
got the beard
going these days?
1308
01:22:19,644 --> 01:22:21,270
Uh, no.
He's on a diet.
1309
01:22:26,943 --> 01:22:28,402
So you call
your dad yet?
1310
01:22:33,366 --> 01:22:37,536
Why should I, Morris?
1311
01:22:37,620 --> 01:22:42,124
I don't know
the history
between you guys--
1312
01:22:42,166 --> 01:22:45,127
but if you're blessed
enough to have a dad
to call,
1313
01:22:45,211 --> 01:22:47,505
you should call him.
1314
01:22:47,588 --> 01:22:51,634
You've been
more of a father to me
these last three months.
1315
01:22:51,676 --> 01:22:53,386
Yeah, but I'm
not your dad.
1316
01:22:53,469 --> 01:22:56,222
I am your friend.
1317
01:22:56,305 --> 01:22:58,724
And as your friend,
I'm telling you...
1318
01:22:58,808 --> 01:22:59,809
Call your dad.
1319
01:23:29,005 --> 01:23:30,339
Morris, you okay?
1320
01:23:31,632 --> 01:23:33,092
Morris
1321
01:23:33,175 --> 01:23:34,844
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Hey, Morris!
1322
01:23:34,927 --> 01:23:37,221
Morris! Hey, talk
to me, buddy.
Talk to me.
1323
01:23:37,304 --> 01:23:39,515
Morris!
1324
01:23:39,557 --> 01:23:41,017
Mo--Help!
1325
01:23:41,100 --> 01:23:42,393
Morris! Hey, hey,
come on, come on.
1326
01:23:42,476 --> 01:23:44,103
Justin!
Doris!
1327
01:23:44,186 --> 01:23:46,731
Call an ambulance!
1328
01:23:46,814 --> 01:23:49,817
Oh, my God.
Don't leave me.
1329
01:23:49,900 --> 01:23:52,695
Don't leave me.
1330
01:23:52,778 --> 01:23:54,947
Don't leave me.
1331
01:23:55,031 --> 01:23:56,198
Morris!
1332
01:23:56,240 --> 01:23:58,200
Don't leave me!
1333
01:23:58,284 --> 01:24:00,619
Help!
Help_
1334
01:24:48,501 --> 01:24:50,002
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry.
1335
01:24:50,086 --> 01:24:51,462
Everything's fine.
I'm sorry.
1336
01:24:51,545 --> 01:24:52,922
Everything's fine.
1337
01:24:52,963 --> 01:24:55,508
Everything's fine,
I'm sorry.
1338
01:24:55,591 --> 01:24:57,927
Everything's fine.
Rich'?
1339
01:24:57,968 --> 01:25:00,262
Sam!
Are you drunk?
1340
01:25:00,346 --> 01:25:06,143
Shhh.
I don't want
anyone to know.
1341
01:25:06,227 --> 01:25:09,188
Everyone knows.
1342
01:25:09,271 --> 01:25:10,314
Can I talk to you outside?
1343
01:25:23,327 --> 01:25:24,411
Look, man--
1344
01:25:27,790 --> 01:25:29,500
you got to understand.
People in my family
1345
01:25:29,583 --> 01:25:31,085
don't come
to these things sober.
1346
01:25:37,049 --> 01:25:40,719
Sam, I'm sorry.
1347
01:25:40,803 --> 01:25:42,054
He was like
a father to me.
1348
01:25:48,561 --> 01:25:49,895
He wasn't your dad.
1349
01:25:57,945 --> 01:25:59,029
He was mine.
1350
01:26:36,025 --> 01:26:38,194
You're not going
to hit me, are you?
1351
01:26:40,571 --> 01:26:43,199
No.
1352
01:26:43,282 --> 01:26:44,283
Well--
1353
01:26:44,366 --> 01:26:46,619
probably not.
1354
01:26:46,702 --> 01:26:49,914
But if I would,
you would deserve it.
1355
01:26:49,997 --> 01:26:52,708
Yeah, I would.
I do.
1356
01:26:55,878 --> 01:26:58,714
Now what?
1357
01:26:58,797 --> 01:27:01,300
I was thinking
the same thing.
1358
01:27:01,383 --> 01:27:06,889
You sticking
around Wichita?
1359
01:27:06,931 --> 01:27:12,645
You know
I left Nashville
to be with your dad.
1360
01:27:12,728 --> 01:27:15,314
Okay, Richard.
1361
01:27:15,397 --> 01:27:17,066
So now what are
you going to do?
1362
01:27:19,401 --> 01:27:20,903
I don't know.
1363
01:27:20,986 --> 01:27:22,446
What would you
tell somebody
1364
01:27:22,529 --> 01:27:24,073
in your exact situation?
1365
01:27:24,156 --> 01:27:25,908
And I know you know
the answer to this.
1366
01:27:25,950 --> 01:27:27,534
If I was talking
to somebody else,
1367
01:27:27,618 --> 01:27:29,203
I'd give them
the Sunday School answer.
1368
01:27:29,286 --> 01:27:30,663
And what
is wrong with that?
1369
01:27:30,746 --> 01:27:33,666
My dad was a--
1370
01:27:33,749 --> 01:27:36,460
My dad was
a Sunday School teacher
1371
01:27:36,543 --> 01:27:38,254
for 20 years.
1372
01:27:38,337 --> 01:27:40,756
If there's one thing
that I learned from him,
1373
01:27:40,839 --> 01:27:43,008
I learned that sometimes
the Sunday School answers
1374
01:27:43,092 --> 01:27:45,844
are exactly
the right ones.
1375
01:27:45,928 --> 01:27:46,971
So what is it?
1376
01:27:50,266 --> 01:27:54,311
That God loves you
even when you don't
feel it but--
Exactly.
1377
01:27:54,395 --> 01:27:55,771
Exactly.
1378
01:27:55,854 --> 01:27:57,856
But the truth is
I don't get it.
1379
01:27:57,940 --> 01:28:00,442
Even when I'm supposed
to know it, I just don't
feel it.
1380
01:28:00,484 --> 01:28:04,363
So, what do you know?
What do you feel?
1381
01:28:06,031 --> 01:28:09,201
I feel broken.
1382
01:28:09,285 --> 01:28:12,496
The only thing
that makes me
feel...good
1383
01:28:12,579 --> 01:28:14,999
is not
pretending otherwise.
1384
01:28:15,082 --> 01:28:18,711
Well, I think
that's a good place to start.
1385
01:28:22,965 --> 01:28:27,219
You know we're going
to be okay, right?
1386
01:28:27,303 --> 01:28:28,804
We're going to be okay.
1387
01:28:32,683 --> 01:28:34,560
I hope so.
1388
01:29:01,670 --> 01:29:04,214
Losing Morris
was devastating.
1389
01:29:04,298 --> 01:29:06,008
And left me
at another crossroads
1390
01:29:06,091 --> 01:29:08,761
in my life.
1391
01:29:08,844 --> 01:29:10,929
I came to Wichita
to find myself,
1392
01:29:11,013 --> 01:29:15,768
only to leave feeling
just' as lost' as I
had before.
1393
01:29:15,851 --> 01:29:18,437
I set out on the road
again with Justin,
1394
01:29:18,520 --> 01:29:19,897
not really sure
where I was headed.
1395
01:29:27,988 --> 01:29:30,574
Hey, Rich.
1396
01:29:30,657 --> 01:29:32,034
Where were you?
1397
01:29:32,076 --> 01:29:34,119
I was just getting
some food.
1398
01:29:34,203 --> 01:29:37,581
Don't go anywhere
without telling me
where you're going. Okay?
1399
01:29:37,664 --> 01:29:39,458
Okay.
Is everything all right?
1400
01:29:39,541 --> 01:29:41,627
I was just'- -
I don't need
you to talk.
1401
01:29:41,710 --> 01:29:44,213
Just, if you're
going somewhere, tell
me where you're going.
1402
01:29:44,296 --> 01:29:46,799
Okay? Or take
me with you.
1403
01:29:46,882 --> 01:29:48,717
Okay, but--
Damn it.
1404
01:29:55,057 --> 01:29:57,935
Hey, Can I may
YOU a tape?
1405
01:29:58,018 --> 01:29:59,561
What is it?
1406
01:29:59,645 --> 01:30:01,897
There's this preacher.
1407
01:30:01,939 --> 01:30:04,942
You should know better
than to even ask me
to listen to a preacher.
1408
01:30:05,025 --> 01:30:06,777
Just give it ten minutes.
1409
01:30:15,661 --> 01:30:18,080
In the 33 years
since I was first ambushed
1410
01:30:18,122 --> 01:30:19,915
by Jesus in a little chapel
1411
01:30:19,957 --> 01:30:22,835
in the mountains
of western Pennsylvania,
1412
01:30:22,918 --> 01:30:27,464
and the literally thousands
of hours of prayer
and meditation,
1413
01:30:27,548 --> 01:30:31,510
silence, solitude
in those years,
1414
01:30:31,593 --> 01:30:35,097
I am now
utterly convinced
1415
01:30:35,139 --> 01:30:37,349
that on Judgment Day
1416
01:30:37,433 --> 01:30:43,689
the Lord Jesus will ask
one question and only
one question,
1417
01:30:43,772 --> 01:30:45,732
Did you believe
that I loved you?
1418
01:30:48,193 --> 01:30:51,196
That I desired you?
1419
01:30:51,280 --> 01:30:56,034
That I waited
for you day after day?
1420
01:30:56,118 --> 01:31:00,956
That I longed to hear
the sound of your voice?
1421
01:31:00,998 --> 01:31:03,959
The real believers
will respond and say,
1422
01:31:04,001 --> 01:31:06,295
I believed in your love,
1423
01:31:06,378 --> 01:31:10,632
and I tried
to shape my life
as a response to it.
1424
01:31:10,716 --> 01:31:14,094
But many of us
who are so faithful
in our ministry,
1425
01:31:14,178 --> 01:31:17,723
our practice,
church going,
1426
01:31:17,806 --> 01:31:19,308
are going to answer
1427
01:31:19,391 --> 01:31:22,519
Well, frankly, no sir.
1428
01:31:22,603 --> 01:31:25,856
I never really believed it.
1429
01:31:25,939 --> 01:31:29,234
And there's the difference
between the real believers
1430
01:31:29,318 --> 01:31:32,988
and the nominal Christians
that abound in our churches
across the land.
1431
01:31:33,030 --> 01:31:36,033
No one can measure
like a believer
1432
01:31:36,116 --> 01:31:39,244
the depth and intensity
of God's love.
1433
01:31:39,328 --> 01:31:41,038
But' then again,
no one can measure
like a believer
1434
01:31:41,121 --> 01:31:43,582
the effectiveness
of our gloom,
our pessimism,
1435
01:31:43,665 --> 01:31:47,252
our low self-esteem,
our self-hatred and despair
1436
01:31:47,336 --> 01:31:50,339
that block God's way to us.
1437
01:31:50,380 --> 01:31:52,216
Do you see now
why it's so important
1438
01:31:52,299 --> 01:31:55,761
to lay hold of this basic
truth of our faith?
1439
01:31:55,844 --> 01:32:00,766
Because you're only going
to be as big as your own
concept of God.
1440
01:32:00,849 --> 01:32:02,351
We make God in our own image
1441
01:32:02,434 --> 01:32:05,354
and he winds up being
as fussy and rude
1442
01:32:05,395 --> 01:32:08,023
and narrow-minded
and judgmental
andlegahsfic
1443
01:32:08,065 --> 01:32:11,401
and unloving
and unforgiving as we are.
1444
01:32:11,485 --> 01:32:15,197
I've been in churches
in Bangor, Maine,
Miami, Seattle,
1445
01:32:15,280 --> 01:32:18,283
San Diego, and Saint Louis,
and honest to God
1446
01:32:18,367 --> 01:32:22,746
if so many Christians
I meet is too small for me.
1447
01:32:22,829 --> 01:32:24,915
Because he is
not the God of the Word.
1448
01:32:24,998 --> 01:32:28,418
He is not the God
who is revealed
in and by Jesus Christ,
1449
01:32:28,502 --> 01:32:31,964
who at this moment
comes to your seat
and says,
1450
01:32:32,047 --> 01:32:35,050
I have a word for you.
1451
01:32:35,092 --> 01:32:37,719
I know
your whole life story.
1452
01:32:37,803 --> 01:32:39,763
I know
e very skeleton
in your closet.
1453
01:32:39,846 --> 01:32:42,766
I know every moment of sin
and shame and dishonesty
1454
01:32:42,849 --> 01:32:45,811
and degraded love
that's darkened
your past.
1455
01:32:45,894 --> 01:32:49,940
Right now,
I know your shallow faith,
your feeble prayer life,
1456
01:32:50,023 --> 01:32:52,776
your inconsistent
discipleship,
1457
01:32:52,859 --> 01:32:56,321
and my word
to you is this.
1458
01:32:56,405 --> 01:32:59,575
I dare you
to trust that I love you.
1459
01:33:01,743 --> 01:33:03,912
Just as you are.
1460
01:33:03,954 --> 01:33:05,998
Not as you should be.
1461
01:33:08,458 --> 01:33:11,461
Because none of us
are as we should be.
1462
01:33:15,173 --> 01:33:18,510
Whoa, what's up?
Are you all right?
1463
01:33:20,262 --> 01:33:23,640
Rich.
1464
01:33:23,724 --> 01:33:24,766
Rich?
1465
01:33:51,251 --> 01:33:53,462
You know, Brennan,
I've been going to church
1466
01:33:53,545 --> 01:33:57,382
since I was less
than a week old.
1467
01:33:57,466 --> 01:34:01,511
I can count on one hand
how many times I've heard
the simple proclamation
1468
01:34:01,595 --> 01:34:04,973
of what the Gospel
is really about.
1469
01:34:05,015 --> 01:34:08,310
There are very few things
I love more than beer.
1470
01:34:08,352 --> 01:34:11,355
Hot fudge sundae
is one of them.
1471
01:34:11,438 --> 01:34:14,149
Beer, huh'?
Mm-hm.
1472
01:34:14,191 --> 01:34:16,818
Yeah, I'm a recovering
alcoholic.
1473
01:34:16,860 --> 01:34:20,405
That's my six-month
sobriety chip from AA.
1474
01:34:20,489 --> 01:34:24,576
I've been on the wagon
and off the wagon more
times than I can remember.
1475
01:34:24,660 --> 01:34:28,121
Definitely more times
than my whiskey-loving
brain can remember.
1476
01:34:30,207 --> 01:34:33,669
It's honest.
You should try it some time.
It's refreshing.
1477
01:34:33,752 --> 01:34:38,090
Brennan, I don't know
if I have any friends left.
1478
01:34:38,173 --> 01:34:40,509
Right now
do you think
you're free?
1479
01:34:41,927 --> 01:34:44,096
What do you mean "free"?
1480
01:34:44,179 --> 01:34:46,682
A free man
wouldn't need
to ask.
1481
01:34:49,434 --> 01:34:50,769
Mm.
1482
01:34:53,980 --> 01:34:55,691
I'm not free.
1483
01:35:01,071 --> 01:35:03,115
I feel like a failure.
1484
01:35:05,325 --> 01:35:07,494
I'm on stage
all the time,
1485
01:35:09,037 --> 01:35:10,747
expected to be
this voice of hope.
1486
01:35:10,831 --> 01:35:13,458
People want me
to be perfect,
but I'm not.
1487
01:35:13,542 --> 01:35:15,210
Brennan,
1488
01:35:16,712 --> 01:35:18,296
I'm always
1489
01:35:21,133 --> 01:35:23,885
carrying around
this darkness.
1490
01:35:23,927 --> 01:35:26,304
We're all fighting
the same battle.
1491
01:35:26,388 --> 01:35:28,432
You know,
I love what you said.
1492
01:35:28,515 --> 01:35:30,892
You said that...
you said that God
loves us for who we are,
1493
01:35:30,976 --> 01:35:33,770
not for who we should be
because none of us are
who we should be.
1494
01:35:33,854 --> 01:35:36,898
Yeah, that's the heart
of the ragamuffin gospel
right there.
1495
01:35:38,692 --> 01:35:40,569
What's that?
1496
01:35:40,610 --> 01:35:44,322
Ragamuffins
are the unsung assembly
of saved sinners.
1497
01:35:44,406 --> 01:35:46,908
They're little
in their own sight,
1498
01:35:46,950 --> 01:35:49,578
and aware
of their brokenness
1499
01:35:49,661 --> 01:35:52,122
and powerlessness
before God.
1500
01:35:55,584 --> 01:35:59,379
A ragamuffin knows
he's only a beggar
at the door of God's mercy.
1501
01:36:01,590 --> 01:36:02,716
Brennan,
1502
01:36:07,679 --> 01:36:11,099
I'm a ragamuffin.
1503
01:36:11,141 --> 01:36:13,185
Oh, I know.
1504
01:36:13,268 --> 01:36:15,604
Me, too.
1505
01:36:15,687 --> 01:36:19,483
And, uh, as one
ragamuffin to another,
1506
01:36:19,566 --> 01:36:22,778
would you judge me
if I had another
hot fudge sundae?
1507
01:36:28,116 --> 01:36:30,827
This next song
is my contribution
1508
01:36:30,911 --> 01:36:34,956
to the...ragamuffin
collection.
1509
01:36:40,170 --> 01:36:44,216
J3 It took the hand
Of God Almighty J3
1510
01:36:44,299 --> 01:36:47,219
J 7'0 part the waters
In the sea
1511
01:36:48,970 --> 01:36:52,349
But /'2' only took
One little lie
1512
01:36:52,432 --> 01:36:55,393
To separate
You and me
1513
01:36:55,477 --> 01:36:58,396
J Oh we are
Not as strong J
1514
01:37:03,485 --> 01:37:05,403
.57 As we think we are .U
1515
01:37:11,076 --> 01:37:14,412
And they say
That' one day Joshua J
1516
01:37:14,496 --> 01:37:17,499
J He made the sun
Stand still in the sky J
1517
01:37:17,582 --> 01:37:23,046
But' I can '2' even
Keep these thoughts
Ofyou J
1518
01:37:23,129 --> 01:37:25,173
L' From passing by L'
1519
01:37:25,257 --> 01:37:27,676
J Oh we are
Not as strong J
1520
01:37:32,639 --> 01:37:34,599
.57 As we think we are .U
1521
01:37:39,688 --> 01:37:41,523
.67 We are frail J
1522
01:37:41,606 --> 01:37:46,361
J3 We are fearfully
And wonderfully made J3
1523
01:37:46,444 --> 01:37:50,198
Forged in the fires
Of human passion
1524
01:37:50,240 --> 01:37:53,785
J Choking on the fumes
Of selfish rage
1525
01:37:53,869 --> 01:37:57,789
J7 And with these
Our hells and our heavens J7
1526
01:37:57,873 --> 01:38:01,042
L' 80 few inches apart L'
1527
01:38:01,126 --> 01:38:05,213
J3 We must be
Awfully small J7
1528
01:38:05,297 --> 01:38:09,551
Not' as strong
As we think we are .U
1529
01:38:31,615 --> 01:38:33,283
Thank you.
1530
01:38:40,874 --> 01:38:45,170
You know, you guys
are all into that
born-again thing,
1531
01:38:45,253 --> 01:38:47,422
which is fine.
1532
01:38:49,507 --> 01:38:51,176
We do need
to be born again.
1533
01:38:51,259 --> 01:38:53,845
Jesus said that
to a guy named
Nicodemus.
1534
01:38:56,389 --> 01:38:58,683
But you tell me I need
to be born again
1535
01:39:00,602 --> 01:39:02,771
to enter
the kingdom of God,
I can tell you
1536
01:39:02,812 --> 01:39:06,316
that you need to sell
everything you have
and give it to the poor.
1537
01:39:06,399 --> 01:39:08,944
'Cause Jesus said that
to one guy, too.
1538
01:39:10,654 --> 01:39:13,365
Maybe that's why God
invented highlighters.
1539
01:39:15,951 --> 01:39:20,121
So we can highlight
what we like in the Bible
and just ignore the rest.
1540
01:39:22,999 --> 01:39:25,460
I think that
when we do things to--
1541
01:39:26,962 --> 01:39:29,339
that corrupt our lives,
1542
01:39:32,550 --> 01:39:36,096
we're really just trying
to comfort some ache
that we have.
1543
01:39:38,139 --> 01:39:40,558
And I think that
the Church exists
1544
01:39:40,642 --> 01:39:43,144
'cause we all
kind of need
each other.
1545
01:39:43,186 --> 01:39:44,771
And why are we all
1546
01:39:46,439 --> 01:39:49,150
walking around church
wearing these masks,
1547
01:39:50,485 --> 01:39:52,404
pretending to be perfect?
1548
01:39:55,323 --> 01:39:57,534
It's so exhausting.
1549
01:39:59,953 --> 01:40:01,788
Why do we do it?
1550
01:40:05,542 --> 01:40:08,586
And I think
that our only hope
is the love of God.
1551
01:40:15,051 --> 01:40:18,388
Hey;
Hey.
1552
01:40:18,471 --> 01:40:20,265
The song I've been
working on that I--
1553
01:40:20,348 --> 01:40:22,267
I kind of want to play
'cause my parents are here,
1554
01:40:22,350 --> 01:40:25,603
so if you
indulge me here, um,
1555
01:40:25,687 --> 01:40:28,064
it's just about my family.
1556
01:40:31,109 --> 01:40:33,945
J3 My folks
They were always J3
1557
01:40:34,029 --> 01:40:37,198
J? The first family
To arrive J3
1558
01:40:37,240 --> 01:40:39,200
J3 Seven people jammed J3
1559
01:40:39,242 --> 01:40:42,871
E mm a car
That seated five D
1560
01:40:42,912 --> 01:40:44,706
X1 There was
One bathroom D
1561
01:40:44,789 --> 01:40:46,708
E To bathe
And shave 'm D?
1562
01:40:46,791 --> 01:40:49,627
.0 Six of us
Stood in line
1563
01:40:49,711 --> 01:40:52,380
J3 And hot water
For only three J7
1564
01:40:52,422 --> 01:40:56,801
J3 But we all
Did just fine J3
1565
01:40:56,885 --> 01:40:59,929
J3 Talk about
Your miracles J3
1566
01:41:00,013 --> 01:41:02,891
J3 Talk about
Your faith J3
1567
01:41:02,932 --> 01:41:05,977
J3 My dad he could
Make things grow J3
1568
01:41:06,061 --> 01:41:09,898
J3 Out of Indiana clay J3
1569
01:41:09,939 --> 01:41:12,442
J3 Mom could make
A gourmet meal J3
1570
01:41:12,525 --> 01:41:15,945
J3 Out of just
Cornbread and beans J3
1571
01:41:16,029 --> 01:41:19,783
J3 And they learned to give
Faith hands and feet J3
1572
01:41:21,451 --> 01:41:24,746
D And somehow
Gave wings J1
1573
01:41:34,422 --> 01:41:36,591
That was nice, boy.
1574
01:41:46,935 --> 01:41:50,355
Wayne, it was wonderful.
1575
01:41:50,438 --> 01:41:52,607
Your dad
thought so, too.
1576
01:41:52,649 --> 01:41:55,193
He just doesn't know
how to say it.
1577
01:41:56,736 --> 01:41:58,446
Wayne, I, M...
1578
01:42:01,074 --> 01:42:03,535
I, uh--
What, Dad?
1579
01:42:06,121 --> 01:42:07,872
Uh, you-you know.
1580
01:42:08,915 --> 01:42:10,458
Thank you, son.
1581
01:42:13,586 --> 01:42:16,297
Neva, we need to,
we need to get going.
1582
01:42:28,476 --> 01:42:30,979
Why don't you go
out there and talk
to him right now?
1583
01:42:32,480 --> 01:42:34,524
Can't you see
he needs you?
1584
01:42:36,526 --> 01:42:39,320
I don't know how
to talk to him, Neva.
1585
01:42:41,072 --> 01:42:42,991
Some other time.
1586
01:43:02,468 --> 01:43:04,721
Hello?
Hello?
1587
01:43:11,519 --> 01:43:13,396
Hello?
Is someone there?
1588
01:43:19,194 --> 01:43:20,403
Is someone there?
1589
01:43:49,891 --> 01:43:52,060
All right, this is good.
Where do you want it?
1590
01:43:52,143 --> 01:43:55,313
Uh, right there.
1591
01:43:55,396 --> 01:43:58,149
Hey, Rich,
you got a phone call
in the office.
1592
01:43:58,233 --> 01:44:00,902
All right.
Church office.
1593
01:44:00,985 --> 01:44:02,570
Can you help me find
the other hammers?
1594
01:44:02,612 --> 01:44:05,073
I can't find them again.
1595
01:44:08,743 --> 01:44:10,495
This is Rich.
1596
01:44:13,831 --> 01:44:15,333
Say that again.
1597
01:44:21,297 --> 01:44:22,966
But I just saw him.
1598
01:44:33,434 --> 01:44:35,019
Dad.
1599
01:45:17,353 --> 01:45:19,897
J? This world J3
1600
01:45:19,981 --> 01:45:26,321
J3 Is not my home J3
1601
01:45:29,157 --> 01:45:32,201
J3 I'm just J3
1602
01:45:32,285 --> 01:45:35,913
J3 Passing through J3
1603
01:45:38,166 --> 01:45:40,084
51 My treasures I1
1604
01:45:40,168 --> 01:45:44,839
J3 Are laid up J3
1605
01:45:44,881 --> 01:45:48,926
J3 Somewhere beyond J3
1606
01:45:49,010 --> 01:45:52,805
J? The blue J3
1607
01:45:56,059 --> 01:46:04,734
.U I can '2' feel at home
1608
01:46:06,194 --> 01:46:11,032
J? In this world J3
1609
01:46:12,200 --> 01:46:17,622
L' Anymore L'
1610
01:46:29,634 --> 01:46:31,260
HEY-
H3'!-
1611
01:46:31,344 --> 01:46:33,304
Where the hell where you?
1612
01:46:33,388 --> 01:46:35,306
I was getting coffee
in the lobby.
1613
01:46:35,390 --> 01:46:38,810
Thought I told you
to leave a note
if you go anywhere.
1614
01:46:38,893 --> 01:46:40,561
Leave a note
to get coffee, Rich?
1615
01:46:40,645 --> 01:46:42,772
What's the point
of having you
on the road
1616
01:46:42,855 --> 01:46:44,732
if you're not going
to be around when
I need you.
1617
01:46:44,774 --> 01:46:47,068
I thought you're--
1618
01:46:47,110 --> 01:46:49,404
I am your friend, Rich.
1619
01:46:49,487 --> 01:46:50,947
What are you
talking about?
1620
01:47:12,427 --> 01:47:13,970
What's wrong
with you, boy?
1621
01:47:21,060 --> 01:47:24,105
What's it like
being all alone, boy?
1622
01:47:28,693 --> 01:47:32,613
You sure like
being famous,
don't you, boy?
1623
01:47:32,655 --> 01:47:35,491
Do you think
you deserve
this success?
1624
01:47:41,289 --> 01:47:43,249
Rich.
1625
01:47:44,959 --> 01:47:47,545
We're going to be late
for Brennan's thing.
1626
01:47:51,090 --> 01:47:52,633
Rich.
1627
01:48:04,145 --> 01:48:06,522
You know that
you're a ragamuffin
1628
01:48:06,606 --> 01:48:09,734
if you're not ashamed
to be a ragamuffin.
1629
01:48:09,817 --> 01:48:13,488
Much like having
the simplicity
of a child,
1630
01:48:13,529 --> 01:48:16,908
and the poverty
of a child, you come
before your Abba Father,
1631
01:48:16,991 --> 01:48:20,661
and you rest'
in your identity
as the beloved of God.
1632
01:48:35,885 --> 01:48:38,012
Hey, Wayne.
Hey!
1633
01:48:38,054 --> 01:48:40,598
How many times
I've got to tell you
not to yank on that thing?
1634
01:48:40,681 --> 01:48:43,059
You're going to break it
just like you broke
the tractor.
1635
01:48:43,142 --> 01:48:45,686
You're going to break
every damn thing
around here.
1636
01:48:45,770 --> 01:48:47,939
Look at me when
I'm talking to you.
1637
01:48:48,022 --> 01:48:50,608
You understand me?
Yes, sir.
1638
01:48:53,236 --> 01:48:55,363
Leave it alone.
1639
01:49:18,052 --> 01:49:19,554
Jesus.
1640
01:49:22,515 --> 01:49:23,766
Jesus.
1641
01:49:26,561 --> 01:49:29,438
I'm going to play
a song that, um,
1642
01:49:29,522 --> 01:49:31,732
that I wrote-I wrote
a while ago now,
1643
01:49:31,816 --> 01:49:35,111
and...it's come
to me more to me
lately.
1644
01:49:38,906 --> 01:49:40,950
This song is kind
of a prayer and, um,
1645
01:49:43,411 --> 01:49:45,746
If you bear with me,
1646
01:49:45,830 --> 01:49:49,125
I'm playing this
more for myself
than for you, so.
1647
01:50:07,685 --> 01:50:13,190
J3 Sometimes my life
Just don't make sense
At all J3
1648
01:50:16,527 --> 01:50:20,615
J When the mountains
Look so big
1649
01:50:20,698 --> 01:50:24,493
J3 And my faith
Just seems so small J3
1650
01:50:26,454 --> 01:50:29,832
J3 So hold me Jesus J3
1651
01:50:29,915 --> 01:50:33,961
J3 'Cause I'm shaking
Like a leaf J3
1652
01:50:34,003 --> 01:50:38,674
J? You have been
King of my glory J3
1653
01:50:38,758 --> 01:50:42,803
D Won": You be
My Prince of Peace 53
1654
01:50:50,144 --> 01:50:53,356
.U I wake up
In the night J
1655
01:50:53,439 --> 01:50:56,150
.57 And feel the dark
1656
01:50:59,320 --> 01:51:02,490
J It's so hot'
Inside my soul
1657
01:51:02,531 --> 01:51:06,827
J? I swear there must be
Blisters on my heart J3
1658
01:51:08,496 --> 01:51:11,874
J3 So hold me Jesus J3
1659
01:51:11,957 --> 01:51:16,587
J3 'Cause I'm shaking
Like a leaf J3
1660
01:51:16,671 --> 01:51:20,925
J? You have been
King of my glory J3
1661
01:51:21,008 --> 01:51:24,720
D Won": You be
My Prince of Peace 53
1662
01:51:26,305 --> 01:51:31,394
J3 Surrender don't come
Natural to me J3
1663
01:51:33,688 --> 01:51:38,025
J3 I'd rather fight
You for something
I don't really want J3
1664
01:51:38,109 --> 01:51:41,987
J3 Than to take what
You give that I need J3
1665
01:51:43,656 --> 01:51:48,285
J3 I've beat my head
Against so many walls J3
1666
01:51:48,369 --> 01:51:51,247
J3 Now I'm falling down J3
1667
01:51:51,330 --> 01:51:56,127
J3 I'm falling
on my knees J3
1668
01:52:01,382 --> 01:52:04,593
J3 And this
Salvation Army band J3
1669
01:52:04,677 --> 01:52:08,097
J3 ls playing this hymn J3
1670
01:52:10,307 --> 01:52:13,728
J3 And His grace
Rings out so deep J3
1671
01:52:13,769 --> 01:52:17,732
J3 It makes
My resistance
Seem so thin J3
1672
01:52:17,815 --> 01:52:22,486
J3 So hold me Jesus J3
1673
01:52:22,570 --> 01:52:26,866
J3 'Cause I'm shaking
Like a leaf J3
1674
01:52:29,744 --> 01:52:34,915
J? You have been
King of my glory J3
1675
01:52:34,999 --> 01:52:39,462
D Won": You be
My Prince 53
1676
01:52:39,545 --> 01:52:41,380
D Of Peace D
1677
01:54:27,069 --> 01:54:29,029
Hold on.
I'm on the phone
with the label.
1678
01:54:29,113 --> 01:54:31,532
Come in.
1679
01:54:31,574 --> 01:54:33,784
Hello?
Hey, Bryan.
1680
01:54:33,868 --> 01:54:36,078
Uh, listen, man.
Uh, this just came
to me last night,
1681
01:54:36,161 --> 01:54:37,621
but I have an idea
for the new record.
1682
01:54:37,705 --> 01:54:40,875
I want to do
ten songs about Jesus.
1683
01:54:40,916 --> 01:54:43,460
Just really simple,
stripped down.
1684
01:54:43,544 --> 01:54:46,547
I'm really excited
about this.
Sorry to cut you off
there, Rich.
1685
01:54:46,589 --> 01:54:49,633
But, uh, I'm afraid
to say this isn't Bryan.
1686
01:54:49,717 --> 01:54:52,970
Who is this?
Well, I was actually really
excited to talk to you.
1687
01:54:53,053 --> 01:54:56,307
My name is Chad Montgomery,
and I'm the new head
of the label.
1688
01:54:56,390 --> 01:54:59,143
Uh, where is Bryan
and Matt?
1689
01:54:59,226 --> 01:55:02,438
Well, unfortunately,
Matt and Bryan are
no longer with us.
1690
01:55:02,521 --> 01:55:04,106
They switched
labels and--
1691
01:55:06,191 --> 01:55:11,322
Matt and Bryan aren't
at the label anymore.
Yeah, I know.
1692
01:55:11,405 --> 01:55:15,826
I've been trying to call
and tell you but you don't
answer the phone.
1693
01:55:15,910 --> 01:55:17,661
Rich, what's this
new record about?
1694
01:55:17,745 --> 01:55:19,747
Why would they leave
without telling me?
1695
01:55:19,830 --> 01:55:22,249
I don't know.
I don't think it's
a bad thing, Rich.
1696
01:55:22,333 --> 01:55:25,794
They're just
moving on.
1697
01:55:25,878 --> 01:55:29,131
Moving on?
What--
Yeah, people do that.
1698
01:55:29,214 --> 01:55:31,425
Yeah, I know
people do that.
1699
01:55:31,508 --> 01:55:33,802
Oh. do you?
1700
01:55:34,845 --> 01:55:35,930
Really?
1701
01:55:38,223 --> 01:55:40,601
Yeah, Justin.
Wha-What's your problem?
1702
01:55:40,684 --> 01:55:43,103
I-I don't have
a problem.
1703
01:55:43,187 --> 01:55:46,106
I'm sorry
if I'm bothering you.
1704
01:55:47,441 --> 01:55:49,526
I just came by
to tell you
1705
01:55:51,028 --> 01:55:52,988
I'm getting married.
1706
01:55:55,157 --> 01:55:58,827
Well, that's--
that's not bad news.
That's good news, man.
1707
01:56:00,245 --> 01:56:01,455
Gosh, I'm-I'm relieved.
1708
01:56:01,497 --> 01:56:04,124
Um--
1709
01:56:04,208 --> 01:56:07,711
No, that's awesome.
We could use another
girl in the tour.
1710
01:56:07,795 --> 01:56:10,130
No, Rich.
1711
01:56:10,172 --> 01:56:12,716
I'm leaving the tour.
1712
01:56:15,844 --> 01:56:16,804
Why would you--
1713
01:56:21,141 --> 01:56:22,851
Of course you are.
1714
01:56:36,991 --> 01:56:38,492
Yeah?
1715
01:56:38,575 --> 01:56:42,871
Rich?
Brennan.
1716
01:56:42,955 --> 01:56:45,082
Okay, ragamuffin.
1717
01:56:45,165 --> 01:56:48,043
On a scale
of one to ten,
how hung over are you?
1718
01:56:51,672 --> 01:56:53,590
Eleven.
1719
01:56:56,218 --> 01:57:00,055
What do you say
that you and I go away
on a retreat of sorts?
1720
01:57:02,016 --> 01:57:04,351
Is today too soon?
1721
01:57:07,688 --> 01:57:10,274
In Jesus' language,
1722
01:57:10,357 --> 01:57:13,610
the word that he taught
the disciples to pray with
was Abba.
1723
01:57:13,694 --> 01:57:17,072
It means -daddy.-
1724
01:57:17,156 --> 01:57:19,867
It doesn't really work
for me to think of God
as a father, Brennan.
1725
01:57:21,035 --> 01:57:23,454
Me, either.
1726
01:57:23,537 --> 01:57:27,041
But it's the essence
of the disciples'
identity.
1727
01:57:27,082 --> 01:57:29,752
And praying Abba,
I belong to you.
1728
01:57:29,835 --> 01:57:31,837
It's like breathing.
1729
01:57:33,797 --> 01:57:37,259
I'll be
in the cabin behind us.
You'll be in this one.
1730
01:57:37,342 --> 01:57:39,720
The first night's going
to be the hardest.
1731
01:57:39,762 --> 01:57:42,473
What exactly
are you going
to have me do?
1732
01:57:42,556 --> 01:57:46,643
I want you to write
a letter from John
to you.
1733
01:57:46,727 --> 01:57:49,772
Brennan, my dad wasn't exactly
the kind of guy that showed
a lot of emotion.
1734
01:57:49,855 --> 01:57:52,900
I'm not sure
I can do that.
1735
01:57:52,983 --> 01:57:56,153
I think you told me
that you knew you
father loved you.
1736
01:57:56,236 --> 01:57:58,322
But he never told you.
1737
01:57:58,405 --> 01:58:00,741
Let him tell you.
1738
01:58:32,189 --> 01:58:34,733
Abba, Abba.
1739
01:58:37,277 --> 01:58:39,321
Abba.
1740
01:58:39,404 --> 01:58:42,449
Please, let my brother
come to see your love.
1741
01:58:56,213 --> 01:58:59,133
Get your damn head
off the clouds, Wayne.
1742
01:59:02,052 --> 01:59:03,804
What's wrong
with you, boy?
1743
01:59:05,973 --> 01:59:08,475
You're going to break
every damn thing
around here.
1744
01:59:11,270 --> 01:59:14,314
Two boys,
two girls,
1745
01:59:14,398 --> 01:59:15,566
and you.
1746
01:59:17,317 --> 01:59:19,444
Look at me
when I'm talking.
1747
01:59:22,322 --> 01:59:24,658
You understand?
Damn fool's things.
1748
01:59:24,741 --> 01:59:26,743
Speak up.
What does it say?
1749
01:59:26,827 --> 01:59:28,912
When I tell you
to do something,
you do it well.
1750
01:59:28,996 --> 01:59:31,206
You understand me?
1751
01:59:31,290 --> 01:59:33,584
I just don't understand
wh y everything you touch
ends up--
1752
01:59:53,937 --> 01:59:55,856
Don't be afraid, son.
1753
02:00:15,125 --> 02:00:17,044
Wayne.
1754
02:00:20,339 --> 02:00:22,758
Wayne, boy.
1755
02:00:24,384 --> 02:00:26,803
You know I didn't mean it.
1756
02:00:26,887 --> 02:00:31,391
Son, if I'm not tough
on you, you're never
going to learn.
1757
02:00:33,310 --> 02:00:34,937
Come on.
1758
02:00:35,020 --> 02:00:36,897
You'll be all right?
1759
02:00:39,107 --> 02:00:40,609
Come on.
1760
02:01:04,299 --> 02:01:06,677
It's time, ragamuffin.
1761
02:01:12,140 --> 02:01:14,476
Dear Wayne,
1762
02:01:14,559 --> 02:01:16,436
it's a lot
like I told you.
1763
02:01:16,478 --> 02:01:20,440
Being poor
ain't shameful
it's just inconvenient.
1764
02:01:23,527 --> 02:01:25,445
I valued you.
1765
02:01:25,529 --> 02:01:28,282
It's just that
I didn't know you.
1766
02:01:28,365 --> 02:01:30,784
I didn't know how
I was supposed
to be affectionate.
1767
02:01:30,826 --> 02:01:33,495
I thought
that was soft.
1768
02:01:33,578 --> 02:01:37,874
I can see the strength
of steel, but I couldn't see
the power of tenderness,
1769
02:01:37,958 --> 02:01:42,296
or the courage it takes
to hold tenderness up
to a fire.
1770
02:01:42,337 --> 02:01:47,467
Anyway, I can '2' even remember
that you walked funny and had
scra wn y shoulders.
1771
02:01:47,551 --> 02:01:49,177
Did you?
1772
02:01:49,261 --> 02:01:51,305
Who the hell cares?
1773
02:01:51,388 --> 02:01:53,473
I'm here in the company
of several fathers
1774
02:01:53,515 --> 02:01:56,143
who occasioned pain
in their sons.
1775
02:01:56,184 --> 02:01:58,312
Abraham did it
to Isaac.
1776
02:01:58,395 --> 02:02:00,397
David to Absalom.
1777
02:02:00,480 --> 02:02:04,651
God Almighty himself even
did it to His boy, Jesus.
1778
02:02:04,693 --> 02:02:07,237
If you love him,
you'll surely hurt him.
1779
02:02:07,321 --> 02:02:09,656
It's just a fact
of life.
1780
02:02:09,740 --> 02:02:13,076
Passion, pain...
1781
02:02:13,160 --> 02:02:17,497
doesn't' have to wreck
your life unless
you make it'.
1782
02:02:17,539 --> 02:02:19,207
That's your choice.
1783
02:02:19,291 --> 02:02:21,668
Be brave
in your pain, son.
1784
02:02:21,710 --> 02:02:23,920
I don't say that
because you're not.
1785
02:02:24,004 --> 02:02:26,506
I'm proof that you
didn't run off from it.
1786
02:02:26,548 --> 02:02:28,508
But keep brave.
1787
02:02:31,345 --> 02:02:34,890
I once wrote you
on October 21st, 1955.
1788
02:02:36,183 --> 02:02:37,642
Richard made me a--
1789
02:02:40,604 --> 02:02:41,855
a very proud man.
1790
02:02:44,358 --> 02:02:47,986
I'm up here in this cloud
of witnesses and you
can ask anything.
1791
02:02:49,696 --> 02:02:52,949
I brag about you
all the time...
1792
02:02:53,033 --> 02:02:55,369
until they're about
to kick me out.
1793
02:02:58,914 --> 02:03:00,791
I love you, boy.
1794
02:03:01,917 --> 02:03:03,460
Dad.
1795
02:03:13,637 --> 02:03:15,806
So, how do you feel,
little brother?
1796
02:03:18,141 --> 02:03:19,893
Free.
1797
02:03:22,396 --> 02:03:24,731
And what does
a free man do?
1798
02:03:24,815 --> 02:03:27,651
I want to be
on the reservation.
1799
02:03:27,734 --> 02:03:30,237
That's...that's where
I want to be.
1800
02:03:30,320 --> 02:03:31,905
I want to be
with those kids.
1801
02:03:31,947 --> 02:03:33,990
Then go.
1802
02:03:34,074 --> 02:03:37,077
I mean, you could do
a lot of good there.
1803
02:03:38,620 --> 02:03:40,580
I think they'll do
more good for me.
1804
02:03:44,459 --> 02:03:48,338
So, what's next,
Brennan?
1805
02:03:48,422 --> 02:03:52,134
Next, I want you to write
a letter from your abba father
God to you.
1806
02:03:53,593 --> 02:03:55,011
That I don't need to do.
1807
02:03:57,013 --> 02:03:58,765
Why?
1808
02:04:00,183 --> 02:04:02,769
I know what
that one would say.
1809
02:04:11,486 --> 02:04:13,488
It always
cracks me up and--
1810
02:04:15,615 --> 02:04:17,200
When people try
to impress God
1811
02:04:17,284 --> 02:04:19,828
because you don't have
to impress God.
1812
02:04:21,788 --> 02:04:24,374
He's already
knocked out by you.
1813
02:04:28,295 --> 02:04:30,630
And Picasso said
something once that
I really liked.
1814
02:04:30,672 --> 02:04:32,674
He said,
1815
02:04:32,757 --> 02:04:36,303
he said that
good taste is
the enemy of great art.
1816
02:04:38,388 --> 02:04:41,391
And I think that's
really true because
1817
02:04:41,475 --> 02:04:45,479
good taste has everything
to do with being cultured
and being refined and...
1818
02:04:47,647 --> 02:04:50,066
if art has to do
with anything, it has
to do with being human.
1819
02:04:50,150 --> 02:04:55,238
I remember, when I was a kid,
I was a typical depressed
adolescent.
1820
02:04:55,322 --> 02:04:58,158
People would always
come up to me and say,
1821
02:04:58,200 --> 02:05:00,327
say, Cheer up.
God loves you.
1822
02:05:02,871 --> 02:05:05,707
And I'd say, Big deal.
God loves everybody.
1823
02:05:08,001 --> 02:05:10,253
It don't make me special.
1824
02:05:12,172 --> 02:05:14,925
It just proves that God
ain't got no taste.
1825
02:05:17,677 --> 02:05:19,846
And I don't think
that he does.
1826
02:05:22,015 --> 02:05:23,892
And thank God.
1827
02:05:28,939 --> 02:05:32,776
So, I think that
God takes the--
1828
02:05:32,859 --> 02:05:35,529
He takes the messiness
and the ugliness
in our lives,
1829
02:05:35,612 --> 02:05:41,034
and he makes
the most beautiful art
in the world out of it.
1830
02:05:41,076 --> 02:05:45,205
If you're half as cultured
and refined as most Christians
wish you were,
1831
02:05:48,250 --> 02:05:50,794
He would be useless
to Christianity.
1832
02:05:57,133 --> 02:05:59,803
But God
is a wild man.
1833
02:06:04,891 --> 02:06:08,103
And I hope that someday
you have the chance
to encounter Him.
1834
02:06:13,567 --> 02:06:16,403
But if you do,
1835
02:06:16,486 --> 02:06:19,864
let me warn you,
because you'd better
hold on for dear life.
1836
02:06:24,995 --> 02:06:27,914
Or let go for dear life
maybe is better.
1837
02:06:33,003 --> 02:06:37,424
J3 There's a wideness
In God's mercy J3
1838
02:06:37,507 --> 02:06:42,304
J I cannot' find
In my own
1839
02:06:42,387 --> 02:06:46,016
J He keeps
His fire burning J
1840
02:06:46,099 --> 02:06:50,186
J7 To melt this
Heart of stone J7
1841
02:06:50,270 --> 02:06:54,691
Keeps n7e aching
With a yearning
1842
02:06:54,774 --> 02:06:59,279
J Makes me glad
To have been caught' J
1843
02:06:59,362 --> 02:07:03,783
J In the reckless
Raging fury
1844
02:07:03,825 --> 02:07:08,538
That' they call
The love of God
1845
02:07:12,792 --> 02:07:16,963
Now I've seen
No band of angels
1846
02:07:17,005 --> 02:07:20,717
But' I've heard
The soldiers' songs
1847
02:07:20,800 --> 02:07:24,638
.U Love hangs over them
Like a banner
1848
02:07:24,721 --> 02:07:28,475
.U Love within them
Leads them on J
1849
02:07:28,558 --> 02:07:33,146
J To the battle
On the journey J
1850
02:07:33,229 --> 02:07:36,399
And it's never
Gonna stop
1851
02:07:36,483 --> 02:07:41,237
Ever widening
Their mercies
1852
02:07:41,321 --> 02:07:46,534
And the fury
Of His love
1853
02:07:46,618 --> 02:07:51,748
.67 Oh the love of God
1854
02:07:51,831 --> 02:07:58,421
And oh
The love of God
1855
02:08:00,215 --> 02:08:03,426
.57 The love of God
1856
02:08:08,723 --> 02:08:13,603
Joy and sorrow
Are this ocean
1857
02:08:13,687 --> 02:08:17,565
J In their every
Ebb and flow
1858
02:08:17,649 --> 02:08:22,320
Now the Lord
A door has opened
1859
02:08:24,823 --> 02:08:28,201
J That' all Hell
Could never close
1860
02:08:28,284 --> 02:08:32,414
Here /'/77 tested
And made worthy
1861
02:08:32,497 --> 02:08:36,668
Tossed about
And lifted up
1862
02:08:44,300 --> 02:08:48,763
J In the reckless
Raging fury
1863
02:08:48,847 --> 02:08:54,227
That' they call
The love of God
1864
02:09:02,736 --> 02:09:05,655
is there anything you'd like
to say to our listeners
1865
02:09:05,739 --> 02:09:07,824
before we sign off?
1866
02:09:09,743 --> 02:09:11,411
People are going
to judge you.
1867
02:09:11,494 --> 02:09:14,330
People are going
to condemn you.
1868
02:09:14,414 --> 02:09:17,292
You know, a matter
of fact, it seems
as though some people,
1869
02:09:17,375 --> 02:09:19,753
that's exactly what
they're looking for.
1870
02:09:21,671 --> 02:09:24,257
I would rather live
in the verge of falling
1871
02:09:24,299 --> 02:09:27,802
and let my security be found
in the all-sufficiency
of the grace of God
1872
02:09:27,886 --> 02:09:34,184
than to live in some kind
of pielislic illusion
of.--moral excellence.
1873
02:10:18,144 --> 02:10:21,898
I guess I'd say
go out and live
real good.
1874
02:10:21,981 --> 02:10:24,651
I promise
you'll get
beat up real bad.
1875
02:10:26,277 --> 02:10:28,071
But in a little while,
1876
02:10:28,154 --> 02:10:30,073
after you're dead,
1877
02:10:30,156 --> 02:10:33,535
you 'll be
rotted a way anyway.
1878
02:10:33,618 --> 02:10:36,287
It's not going to matter
if you have a few scars.
1879
02:10:38,039 --> 02:10:40,500
But it will matter
if you didn't live.
1880
02:11:17,871 --> 02:11:21,207
Everybody
Each and all
1881
02:11:21,291 --> 02:11:24,794
J We're gonna die
Eventually
1882
02:11:26,754 --> 02:11:30,133
J It's no more
Or less our faults
1883
02:11:30,216 --> 02:11:33,761
J Than if is
Our destiny
1884
02:11:35,555 --> 02:11:38,808
J 80 now Lord
I come to you
1885
02:11:38,892 --> 02:11:42,228
Asking only
For Your grace
1886
02:11:44,063 --> 02:11:47,734
J You know what I've
Put' myself through
1887
02:11:47,817 --> 02:11:51,905
All those empty
Dreams I chased
1888
02:11:51,946 --> 02:11:56,326
And when my body
Lies in the ruins
1889
02:11:56,409 --> 02:12:00,622
Of the lies that
Nearly ruined me
1890
02:12:00,705 --> 02:12:04,834
J Will You pick up
The pieces that were
Pure and true
1891
02:12:04,918 --> 02:12:08,922
And breathe
Your Life into them
And set' them free
1892
02:12:09,005 --> 02:12:13,509
.UAnd when You start'
This world over again
From scratch
1893
02:12:13,593 --> 02:12:17,847
J Will You make me anew
Out' of the stuff
That' lasts
1894
02:12:17,931 --> 02:12:20,600
J Stuff that's purer
Than gold is .U
1895
02:12:20,683 --> 02:12:24,687
Clearer than glass
Could ever be J
1896
02:12:27,106 --> 02:12:30,902
.67 Can I be with You
1897
02:12:35,531 --> 02:12:38,284
.67 Can I be with You
1898
02:13:16,656 --> 02:13:18,700
And the Irish
have always
1899
02:13:18,783 --> 02:13:21,536
sort of traditionally
have been afraid of going
out to sea.
1900
02:13:21,619 --> 02:13:23,746
People go to Ireland
and they come back
1901
02:13:23,830 --> 02:13:26,666
and they have these really
beautiful big sweaters,
real big bulky,
1902
02:13:26,708 --> 02:13:29,085
and they've got
all kinds of stitches
and stuff in them.
1903
02:13:29,168 --> 02:13:32,088
Well, they started
doing that because each
of those different stitches
1904
02:13:32,171 --> 02:13:34,424
it's different charms
and prayers and stuff
1905
02:13:34,507 --> 02:13:37,010
that they would weave
into their husband's
sweaters.
1906
02:13:37,051 --> 02:13:41,264
And, uh, so, you know,
if it worked, then their
husbands would come back alive.
1907
02:13:41,347 --> 02:13:43,933
And if it didn't,
because fish don't
eat wool,
1908
02:13:44,017 --> 02:13:47,854
they could tell
who was who by what
sweater was on them.
1909
02:13:54,110 --> 02:13:56,279
I just think that's
a charming story.
1910
02:14:02,869 --> 02:14:06,789
It scares me when I talk
to you guys and you guys think
so highly of Christian music,
1911
02:14:06,873 --> 02:14:10,626
contemporary Christian
music especially, because
I know a lot of us
1912
02:14:10,710 --> 02:14:13,379
and we don't know jack
about anything.
1913
02:14:16,466 --> 02:14:18,926
Not that I don't want you
to buy our records.
1914
02:14:20,636 --> 02:14:23,389
Orcome
to our concerts,
I sure do.
1915
02:14:23,431 --> 02:14:26,309
But you should come
for entertainment.
1916
02:14:26,392 --> 02:14:29,812
If you really want
spiritual nourishment,
you should go to church.
1917
02:14:38,196 --> 02:14:40,948
Those people
care about you.
1918
02:14:41,032 --> 02:14:43,242
You don't have
to buy a ticket.
1919
02:14:49,499 --> 02:14:53,586
We are not saved
because we're good.
1920
02:14:53,669 --> 02:14:55,755
We're good
because we're saved.
1921
02:14:57,381 --> 02:15:00,093
And never forget
what Jesus did for you.
1922
02:15:00,176 --> 02:15:04,222
Never take lightly
what it cost him.
1923
02:15:06,140 --> 02:15:10,103
And never assume
that if it cost him
his very life,
1924
02:15:11,979 --> 02:15:14,232
that it will
cost you yours.
1925
02:15:21,072 --> 02:15:24,784
And when you wash up
on that other shore,
1926
02:15:24,867 --> 02:15:28,704
even though
you've been disfigured
beyond any recognition,
1927
02:15:34,627 --> 02:15:38,131
the angels are going
to see you there and
they'll go, What is this?
1928
02:15:40,299 --> 02:15:42,802
We're not even sure
if he's human.
1929
02:15:44,637 --> 02:15:48,349
But Jesus will say,
No, that's human.
1930
02:15:48,432 --> 02:15:50,309
I know that one.
1931
02:15:50,393 --> 02:15:53,229
And they'll say,
Jesus, how do you
know that one?
1932
02:15:55,273 --> 02:15:57,650
And he will say,
Well, you see that
sweater he's got on?
141272
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