All language subtitles for S.W.A.T. (2017) - 03x18 - Stigma.KILLERS-mSD.English.HI.C.orig.Addic7ed.com

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian Download
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French Download
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian Download
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt-PT Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,239 --> 00:00:01,508 Previously on "S.W.A.T..." 2 00:00:01,532 --> 00:00:03,817 - *** Raymont Harris - CHILD: (GIGGLING) 3 00:00:03,841 --> 00:00:06,534 was accidentally shot by team leader Buck Spivey. 4 00:00:06,558 --> 00:00:08,254 I spent my life serving this city, 5 00:00:08,278 --> 00:00:09,988 and I undid everything I had accomplished 6 00:00:10,012 --> 00:00:11,181 with a single mistake. 7 00:00:11,205 --> 00:00:13,405 We're looking to launch a private security firm. 8 00:00:13,429 --> 00:00:14,593 I've struggled a bunch since leaving SWAT. 9 00:00:14,617 --> 00:00:16,075 I mean, this could be big for me. 10 00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:17,582 All right, let's do this. 11 00:00:17,606 --> 00:00:19,046 Where does Buck fit into all this? 12 00:00:19,070 --> 00:00:20,540 He can't be the name or face of this company. 13 00:00:20,564 --> 00:00:21,615 You can. 14 00:00:21,639 --> 00:00:22,816 Concert promoter's pissed. 15 00:00:22,840 --> 00:00:24,406 He hasn't been able to reach Buck all day. 16 00:00:24,430 --> 00:00:26,810 So what happens to Buck? 17 00:00:28,971 --> 00:00:30,597 Most times, I... 18 00:00:31,215 --> 00:00:34,885 I work stuff out by talking to my family or friends. 19 00:00:36,812 --> 00:00:38,188 I know they have my back. 20 00:00:39,231 --> 00:00:41,091 And that keeps me grounded. 21 00:00:44,566 --> 00:00:46,067 But... 22 00:00:47,398 --> 00:00:49,843 ...today's the first time I felt like I really needed this. 23 00:00:51,354 --> 00:00:53,078 Because of what happened. 24 00:00:53,533 --> 00:00:54,848 Yeah. 25 00:00:55,247 --> 00:00:56,917 That really sucked. 26 00:00:57,416 --> 00:00:59,319 Maybe it'd be easier if we talk about it, 27 00:00:59,343 --> 00:01:00,877 from the beginning. 28 00:01:04,615 --> 00:01:06,282 It started with Hondo. 29 00:01:09,986 --> 00:01:11,464 AUTOMATED VOICE: We're sorry. 30 00:01:11,488 --> 00:01:13,889 The voice mailbox you've reached is full. 31 00:01:17,027 --> 00:01:18,371 Everything okay, babe? 32 00:01:18,395 --> 00:01:21,307 Yeah, a pipe burst overnight at the community center. 33 00:01:21,331 --> 00:01:23,676 Got to get in and see how bad the damage is. 34 00:01:23,700 --> 00:01:25,537 You got a sump pump you keep handy? 35 00:01:25,561 --> 00:01:27,180 Oh, I'm fresh out, boo. 36 00:01:27,204 --> 00:01:29,348 I swear that place is gonna drive me to bankruptcy. 37 00:01:29,372 --> 00:01:30,562 It's always something. 38 00:01:30,586 --> 00:01:31,792 Yeah, I know the feeling. 39 00:01:32,086 --> 00:01:33,152 What's up? 40 00:01:33,176 --> 00:01:34,554 I just can't get a hold of Buck. 41 00:01:34,578 --> 00:01:36,022 Your old team leader? 42 00:01:36,046 --> 00:01:38,057 - Something wrong? - No one's seen him in a few days. 43 00:01:38,081 --> 00:01:39,425 And Deacon mentioned something was off about him, 44 00:01:39,449 --> 00:01:41,294 and now he's not answering anybody's calls. 45 00:01:41,318 --> 00:01:43,134 - Quick trip to Vegas maybe? - I don't know. 46 00:01:43,158 --> 00:01:44,856 He's fell off the grid like this a couple times before 47 00:01:44,880 --> 00:01:46,666 when something was wrong, 48 00:01:46,690 --> 00:01:48,257 so I'm just gonna stop by his place and check in. 49 00:01:48,967 --> 00:01:50,221 I think you should. 50 00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:52,328 - Love you. - Bye. 51 00:01:54,331 --> 00:01:55,599 (SIGHS) 52 00:01:58,768 --> 00:02:00,680 (DOORBELL RINGS) 53 00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:02,872 (KNOCKING) 54 00:02:06,309 --> 00:02:08,321 All right, Buck keeps a spare key around back. 55 00:02:08,345 --> 00:02:11,081 That's what got me in the last time I was worried about him. 56 00:02:12,416 --> 00:02:13,560 Buck? 57 00:02:14,368 --> 00:02:15,911 You home? 58 00:02:17,822 --> 00:02:19,454 Check the rooms and the garage. 59 00:02:19,478 --> 00:02:20,924 Yeah. 60 00:02:29,091 --> 00:02:30,210 STREET: No sign of him. 61 00:02:30,234 --> 00:02:31,979 Car's gone, too. 62 00:02:32,678 --> 00:02:35,970 Man, I know Buck likes to throw a few back, but this is... 63 00:02:36,654 --> 00:02:37,866 it's a lot. 64 00:02:40,663 --> 00:02:42,197 His phone's dead. 65 00:02:43,281 --> 00:02:45,979 Found these in the bedroom. Sleeping pills. 66 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,361 Rest of the rooms look like this one? 67 00:02:48,386 --> 00:02:49,663 Yeah. 68 00:02:49,687 --> 00:02:51,398 Looks like the last couple of calls 69 00:02:51,422 --> 00:02:53,144 went to an Owen Bennett yesterday. 70 00:02:53,168 --> 00:02:55,246 Yeah. That's our business partner at the private security firm. 71 00:02:55,270 --> 00:02:57,337 There's only one other call to a 1-800 number. 72 00:02:57,361 --> 00:02:58,639 (LINE RINGING) 73 00:02:58,663 --> 00:03:00,040 AUTOMATED VOICE: You have reached 74 00:03:00,064 --> 00:03:01,961 the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, 75 00:03:01,985 --> 00:03:04,128 also servicing the Veteran's Crisis Line. 76 00:03:04,843 --> 00:03:07,948 If you are in emotional distress or suicidal crisis 77 00:03:07,972 --> 00:03:09,583 or are concerned about someone who might be, 78 00:03:09,607 --> 00:03:11,223 we're here to help. 79 00:03:11,247 --> 00:03:13,453 - Please remain on the... - How long was the call? 80 00:03:13,477 --> 00:03:16,123 It says one minute, which means it could've been less. 81 00:03:16,147 --> 00:03:18,357 - He might've just called and hung up. - Gun safe's empty, too. 82 00:03:18,381 --> 00:03:19,760 Get a hold of the rest of 20-Squad. 83 00:03:19,784 --> 00:03:21,061 We got to track Buck down now. 84 00:03:21,085 --> 00:03:22,863 - How do you plan on doing that? - I'm not sure. 85 00:03:22,887 --> 00:03:24,164 But I got a real bad feeling 86 00:03:24,188 --> 00:03:25,799 we don't have time to get it wrong. 87 00:03:25,823 --> 00:03:33,828 Synced & corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com 88 00:04:01,980 --> 00:04:04,292 Dad used to hate it our when Captain McClintock 89 00:04:04,316 --> 00:04:05,748 made him do these sessions. 90 00:04:05,772 --> 00:04:07,944 - Why's that? - He thought they were B.S. 91 00:04:07,969 --> 00:04:11,599 That anyone who needed therapy wasn't fit to be a cop. 92 00:04:11,623 --> 00:04:14,299 He used to tell me, "How can you trust somebody to have your back 93 00:04:14,323 --> 00:04:16,404 when they don't even have their own issues squared away?" 94 00:04:16,428 --> 00:04:18,640 I see hundreds of officers every year, Luca. 95 00:04:18,664 --> 00:04:19,979 Do you feel that way about them? 96 00:04:20,003 --> 00:04:22,496 No. I mean, I get why we do it now. 97 00:04:23,274 --> 00:04:25,123 Especially after a day like today. 98 00:04:26,416 --> 00:04:28,072 (SIGHS) 99 00:04:28,257 --> 00:04:31,004 Well, Buck was old school like my pops. 100 00:04:31,944 --> 00:04:34,813 He didn't like talking to the cop shrink, either. 101 00:04:37,082 --> 00:04:38,720 Maybe it would've helped him. 102 00:04:39,471 --> 00:04:41,891 Has what happened today given you second thoughts 103 00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:44,198 about getting back into the field? 104 00:04:44,222 --> 00:04:46,958 Nah, I can't wait to get back out there. 105 00:04:47,471 --> 00:04:50,569 But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't worried. 106 00:04:50,593 --> 00:04:51,942 (SOFTLY): Hmm. 107 00:04:53,065 --> 00:04:54,611 I mean, what if I can't? 108 00:04:56,795 --> 00:04:58,459 I already failed one fitness test. 109 00:04:58,483 --> 00:05:00,659 I thought it was because of my hip. 110 00:05:03,628 --> 00:05:04,734 What if it's really... 111 00:05:05,647 --> 00:05:06,552 (SIGHS) 112 00:05:06,577 --> 00:05:08,011 up here, you know? 113 00:05:09,584 --> 00:05:11,920 That's not so easy to fix. 114 00:05:12,384 --> 00:05:15,219 Is losing SWAT something you're afraid of? 115 00:05:16,088 --> 00:05:18,296 For as long as SWAT's existed, 116 00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:20,637 there's always been a Luca on the team. 117 00:05:22,434 --> 00:05:23,807 Without it... 118 00:05:26,164 --> 00:05:27,727 I don't know who I am. 119 00:05:32,677 --> 00:05:34,317 Maybe that's how Buck felt, too. 120 00:05:38,363 --> 00:05:40,083 Hey, what's the word, Hondo? 121 00:05:40,107 --> 00:05:41,923 Buck's been AWOL for 48 hours 122 00:05:41,947 --> 00:05:43,910 and we think he might be having suicidal thoughts. 123 00:05:44,916 --> 00:05:47,579 Put the word out with patrols, some of his old metro buddies. 124 00:05:47,603 --> 00:05:49,144 They're gonna reach out if they locate him. 125 00:05:49,168 --> 00:05:51,137 - Hopefully, it's not too late. - What? What's that supposed to mean? 126 00:05:51,161 --> 00:05:53,183 Buck's not here and we don't know where he's headed. 127 00:05:53,207 --> 00:05:54,343 Yeah, well, that's why we need to find him. 128 00:05:54,368 --> 00:05:55,412 We will. Buck will be fine. 129 00:05:55,436 --> 00:05:56,840 One thing's for sure: we ain't gonna find Buck 130 00:05:56,864 --> 00:05:58,473 just standing around here, so let's plan this out. 131 00:05:58,497 --> 00:06:00,885 All right, Chris and I can go talk to Owen. 132 00:06:00,909 --> 00:06:02,238 Last two calls he made were to him. 133 00:06:02,262 --> 00:06:03,884 Tan, I want you to check and see if Buck stopped 134 00:06:03,908 --> 00:06:05,295 at any of his favorite haunts around town. 135 00:06:05,319 --> 00:06:06,473 - You know the places. - Yeah. 136 00:06:06,497 --> 00:06:08,268 Street and I will try to find Buck's ex-wife Jenny, 137 00:06:08,292 --> 00:06:09,445 see if he reached out to her. 138 00:06:09,469 --> 00:06:11,586 Luca, you sit on his house in case he comes home. 139 00:06:11,610 --> 00:06:12,987 All right, be careful. We think Buck is armed 140 00:06:13,011 --> 00:06:14,450 and he may be drinking. 141 00:06:14,474 --> 00:06:15,620 That's a scary combination. 142 00:06:15,644 --> 00:06:17,355 And keep your phones close. Rocker and Becker's teams 143 00:06:17,379 --> 00:06:19,124 are up today, but we're on call in case 144 00:06:19,148 --> 00:06:20,358 anything else pops off in the city. 145 00:06:20,382 --> 00:06:21,860 - Let's get it done. - Okay. 146 00:06:22,717 --> 00:06:24,046 Got your voice mail. 147 00:06:24,070 --> 00:06:25,096 It sounded urgent. 148 00:06:25,120 --> 00:06:26,364 Did Buck stop by here today? 149 00:06:26,388 --> 00:06:29,077 Yeah. To resign from the company. 150 00:06:29,101 --> 00:06:30,470 - When? - A few hours ago. 151 00:06:30,494 --> 00:06:32,304 It was strange. He apologized. 152 00:06:32,328 --> 00:06:34,743 Said that he's been letting me and the company down, 153 00:06:34,767 --> 00:06:37,309 that he needed to resign and get out of our way. 154 00:06:37,333 --> 00:06:38,877 Yeah, his work has been slipping, but I would've got him 155 00:06:38,901 --> 00:06:40,521 back on track, talked him out of quitting. 156 00:06:40,545 --> 00:06:42,213 I tried. But he insisted. 157 00:06:42,237 --> 00:06:44,015 Did he say anything about what he was doing 158 00:06:44,039 --> 00:06:45,183 or where he was going? 159 00:06:45,207 --> 00:06:46,251 No, nothing. 160 00:06:46,589 --> 00:06:47,966 Work aside, 161 00:06:47,991 --> 00:06:49,521 Buck's a friend. 162 00:06:49,934 --> 00:06:51,245 Is he okay? 163 00:06:53,647 --> 00:06:55,416 Hondo, Jim. 164 00:06:55,440 --> 00:06:56,536 Long time. 165 00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:57,996 HONDO: It's nice to see you, Jenny. 166 00:06:58,020 --> 00:06:59,444 Did something happen to Buck? 167 00:07:00,695 --> 00:07:02,334 You say that like it wouldn't be a surprise. 168 00:07:02,358 --> 00:07:04,012 Well, would it be? 169 00:07:04,036 --> 00:07:05,336 He's been drinking, a lot. 170 00:07:05,361 --> 00:07:08,101 Avoiding us, not answering calls. 171 00:07:08,126 --> 00:07:10,293 How bad is it, honestly? 172 00:07:10,318 --> 00:07:12,250 Jenny, we're worried that he might hurt himself. 173 00:07:13,349 --> 00:07:14,526 Have you seen him lately? 174 00:07:14,550 --> 00:07:15,894 Did he reach out at all? 175 00:07:15,918 --> 00:07:17,796 He stopped by a couple of nights ago, 176 00:07:17,820 --> 00:07:19,704 but I wasn't home. 177 00:07:19,728 --> 00:07:21,600 He left me a vinyl record: 178 00:07:21,624 --> 00:07:23,401 "Got to Give It Up" by Marvin Gaye. 179 00:07:23,425 --> 00:07:24,870 Whenever we heard that song, 180 00:07:24,894 --> 00:07:27,305 he'd pull me up and we'd start dancing. 181 00:07:27,329 --> 00:07:29,026 Bars, restaurants, down the middle 182 00:07:29,050 --> 00:07:30,892 of the ice cream aisle at the store. 183 00:07:31,810 --> 00:07:33,979 That was a different Buck, though, different times. 184 00:07:34,003 --> 00:07:35,814 He's just going through a rough patch right now. 185 00:07:36,314 --> 00:07:37,372 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 186 00:07:39,734 --> 00:07:41,611 You really don't know, do you? 187 00:07:43,512 --> 00:07:45,757 After Buck left SWAT, 188 00:07:45,781 --> 00:07:49,111 we tried to reconcile, save our marriage. 189 00:07:49,869 --> 00:07:51,515 He'd always had his struggles, 190 00:07:51,539 --> 00:07:54,848 but it got worse after the Raymont Harris shooting. 191 00:07:54,872 --> 00:07:57,194 Anxiety, depression, 192 00:07:57,218 --> 00:07:58,489 mood swings. 193 00:07:58,513 --> 00:08:00,234 Sometimes he couldn't sleep at all 194 00:08:00,258 --> 00:08:02,325 unless he got blackout drunk. 195 00:08:03,042 --> 00:08:04,634 You've heard of sleepwalking? 196 00:08:06,602 --> 00:08:10,815 Some nights, he'd try to arrest me in his sleep. 197 00:08:11,038 --> 00:08:14,185 Accidentally bounced my head on the nightstand a couple times. 198 00:08:16,724 --> 00:08:19,159 I couldn't stay around anymore. 199 00:08:20,295 --> 00:08:23,274 I tried to get him to talk to somebody, get some help. 200 00:08:23,519 --> 00:08:25,397 But he was too worried about how it would look, 201 00:08:25,421 --> 00:08:27,098 the great Buck Spivey seeming weak. 202 00:08:27,122 --> 00:08:29,409 (PHONE BEEPING) 203 00:08:29,798 --> 00:08:31,242 I still hate that sound. 204 00:08:31,267 --> 00:08:33,504 Yeah, I can't say we're a big fan of it either right now. 205 00:08:33,529 --> 00:08:35,340 Barricade with hostages. 206 00:08:35,364 --> 00:08:37,393 Rocker and Becker can't respond. We're up. 207 00:08:37,417 --> 00:08:39,177 - Thanks. - Hondo. 208 00:08:39,201 --> 00:08:42,172 Call me if you find him, either way. 209 00:08:43,145 --> 00:08:44,372 I will. 210 00:08:46,508 --> 00:08:48,853 All right, Luca, I got unis out looking for him, 211 00:08:48,877 --> 00:08:50,455 a BOLO on his truck. 212 00:08:50,479 --> 00:08:53,258 I'll let you and Hondo know as soon as I spot him. 213 00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:54,934 Keep me updated on your end. 214 00:08:55,935 --> 00:08:57,162 Alicia Baldwin. 215 00:08:57,186 --> 00:08:58,839 Commander Robert Hicks. 216 00:08:58,863 --> 00:09:01,633 - LET ME GUESS: lawyer? - (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 217 00:09:01,657 --> 00:09:03,435 I've been told you have a situation, 218 00:09:03,459 --> 00:09:04,836 so I'll cut to the chase. 219 00:09:04,860 --> 00:09:06,738 I'm here to see Sergeant Daniel Harrelson. 220 00:09:07,071 --> 00:09:08,206 Regarding what? 221 00:09:08,656 --> 00:09:10,308 I'm here on behalf of my client, 222 00:09:10,332 --> 00:09:11,977 who values anonymity and total privacy. 223 00:09:12,001 --> 00:09:14,713 I've been instructed to only speak with Sergeant Harrelson. 224 00:09:14,737 --> 00:09:16,448 Well, he's out on the job right now 225 00:09:16,472 --> 00:09:18,169 and he won't be back for quite some time. 226 00:09:18,193 --> 00:09:20,376 Oh, I'll just wait for him here if you don't mind. 227 00:09:21,043 --> 00:09:22,287 This isn't a Starbucks. 228 00:09:22,962 --> 00:09:24,545 Even so. 229 00:09:26,102 --> 00:09:28,082 (SIRENS WAILING) 230 00:09:31,887 --> 00:09:33,465 Hey, you're first with metro on the scene. 231 00:09:33,489 --> 00:09:35,233 Burrows. So what's the situation? 232 00:09:35,257 --> 00:09:36,501 Looks like a robbery gone bad. 233 00:09:36,525 --> 00:09:39,039 One armed suspect inside, about ten hostages, 234 00:09:39,063 --> 00:09:40,236 at least one wounded. 235 00:09:40,260 --> 00:09:42,207 Unis didn't get a good look. As soon as they arrived, 236 00:09:42,231 --> 00:09:43,608 suspect took a couple shots at them, 237 00:09:43,632 --> 00:09:44,876 barricaded the front, pulled the blinds. 238 00:09:44,900 --> 00:09:46,752 - He make any demands? - Nothing coherent. 239 00:09:46,776 --> 00:09:48,425 Guy's high as hell. I'm guessing meth. 240 00:09:48,449 --> 00:09:50,315 So unstable and unpredictable. 241 00:09:50,339 --> 00:09:51,549 Hondo and Street just got here. 242 00:09:51,573 --> 00:09:52,817 They're gearing up on the four side. 243 00:09:52,841 --> 00:09:53,985 All right, let's get eyes inside, 244 00:09:54,009 --> 00:09:56,411 find our best entry, get these hostages out alive. 245 00:09:57,793 --> 00:09:59,594 ♪ 246 00:10:14,556 --> 00:10:16,441 TAN: 25-David to 20-David. 247 00:10:16,465 --> 00:10:19,402 I got six hostages in a back room on the two side. 248 00:10:19,426 --> 00:10:21,271 Suspect's got a wound to his left leg. 249 00:10:21,716 --> 00:10:22,881 He's on the move. 250 00:10:23,147 --> 00:10:24,516 I've got eyes now. 251 00:10:24,540 --> 00:10:26,451 Suspect's in the dining area, the one side. 252 00:10:26,475 --> 00:10:28,633 I count eight more hostages in the one-four corner 253 00:10:28,657 --> 00:10:30,697 of the dining room; that makes 14 total. 254 00:10:32,481 --> 00:10:34,758 I see the wounded hostage. Doesn't look good. 255 00:10:34,782 --> 00:10:36,294 HONDO: Then we need to move fast. 256 00:10:36,318 --> 00:10:38,419 (GLASS BREAKS) 257 00:10:40,823 --> 00:10:42,724 (FLASHBANG GRENADE BOOMS, PEOPLE GRUNTING) 258 00:10:45,086 --> 00:10:47,372 LAPD! Get on the ground now! 259 00:10:47,755 --> 00:10:49,530 Street, Chris, coming your way. 260 00:10:50,432 --> 00:10:53,211 - (GRUNTS, GROANS) - Don't move! 261 00:10:53,235 --> 00:10:56,014 - Give me your hands. - CHRIS: Code 4. 262 00:10:56,038 --> 00:10:57,638 Suspect in custody. 263 00:11:00,567 --> 00:11:01,778 Heard from Hondo. 264 00:11:01,803 --> 00:11:04,337 We're a Code 4 on the hibachi grill shooter. 265 00:11:04,980 --> 00:11:06,951 - Friend of yours? - Hardly. She couldn't have 266 00:11:06,975 --> 00:11:08,593 picked a worse possible day to show up, though. 267 00:11:08,617 --> 00:11:10,007 I haven't had a spare moment 268 00:11:10,032 --> 00:11:11,263 to figure out what the hell she wants. 269 00:11:11,288 --> 00:11:12,860 Well, I did some digging. 270 00:11:12,884 --> 00:11:15,168 She's not just some ambulance chaser. 271 00:11:15,192 --> 00:11:16,469 She's a power hitter. 272 00:11:16,493 --> 00:11:18,758 She's a junior partner at Cordero-Lask. 273 00:11:18,782 --> 00:11:20,173 HICKS: Someone's paying her 800 bucks an hour 274 00:11:20,197 --> 00:11:21,790 just to sit on her ass? 275 00:11:21,814 --> 00:11:23,294 Something doesn't add up. 276 00:11:23,318 --> 00:11:25,401 Then how about we check her math? 277 00:11:28,617 --> 00:11:32,516 So, what on earth could Cordero-Lask want 278 00:11:32,541 --> 00:11:33,803 with Metro SWAT? 279 00:11:33,827 --> 00:11:36,189 My business is strictly with Sergeant Harrelson. 280 00:11:36,213 --> 00:11:37,608 But you know he isn't here. 281 00:11:37,632 --> 00:11:39,692 Well, still, my client is insistent 282 00:11:39,716 --> 00:11:41,649 on resolving this matter quickly, so I'll wait. 283 00:11:41,673 --> 00:11:43,815 I'm about two seconds from kicking you out of here. 284 00:11:43,839 --> 00:11:45,534 Have I done something wrong? 285 00:11:45,558 --> 00:11:47,094 I'm here to speak with Sergeant Harrelson, 286 00:11:47,118 --> 00:11:48,670 not SWAT or the LAPD. 287 00:11:48,694 --> 00:11:52,505 You go after one of my officers, you go after all of SWAT. 288 00:11:53,196 --> 00:11:56,809 Alicia, is this super secret task of yours 289 00:11:56,833 --> 00:12:00,302 going to involve litigation for Sergeant Harrelson or SWAT? 290 00:12:01,138 --> 00:12:03,841 No. This is a personal matter, 291 00:12:03,865 --> 00:12:06,640 one my client would prefer to keep out of the press. 292 00:12:06,664 --> 00:12:08,097 Well, it would've been a lot easier 293 00:12:08,121 --> 00:12:10,046 if you just said that in the beginning. 294 00:12:15,945 --> 00:12:17,385 BURROWS: We're still interviewing hostages, 295 00:12:17,409 --> 00:12:18,598 but already got bad news. 296 00:12:18,622 --> 00:12:19,718 The restaurant shootout 297 00:12:19,742 --> 00:12:21,686 started as a botched robbery with two gunmen. 298 00:12:21,710 --> 00:12:23,281 The other shooter fled before LAPD arrived. 299 00:12:23,305 --> 00:12:25,142 So there's a second shooter still out there. 300 00:12:25,166 --> 00:12:26,656 - Any I.D.? - None yet. 301 00:12:26,680 --> 00:12:28,186 I got my guys reviewing security footage, 302 00:12:28,210 --> 00:12:29,306 - running down leads. - (PHONE RINGING) 303 00:12:29,330 --> 00:12:30,917 I'll loop SWAT back in when we have anything. 304 00:12:30,941 --> 00:12:31,977 Okay. 305 00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:33,653 Tell me something good, Luca. 306 00:12:33,677 --> 00:12:35,154 Think I got something here at Buck's place. 307 00:12:35,178 --> 00:12:37,356 I just found some paperwork to a storage unit. 308 00:12:37,380 --> 00:12:38,925 Got off the phone with the manager. 309 00:12:38,949 --> 00:12:40,893 He said Buck's car is parked there right now. 310 00:12:40,917 --> 00:12:43,196 - Where is it? - Near Downtown. I just told Hondo. 311 00:12:43,220 --> 00:12:45,206 Text the address. We'll meet you there. 312 00:12:50,660 --> 00:12:52,828 STREET: Buck's truck. 313 00:12:55,632 --> 00:12:57,043 No Buck. 314 00:12:57,067 --> 00:12:58,733 What's his storage unit number? 315 00:12:58,757 --> 00:13:00,221 Unit A308. 316 00:13:01,797 --> 00:13:03,865 I see it. Right here. 317 00:13:11,627 --> 00:13:13,495 Tan, open it up. 318 00:13:21,105 --> 00:13:22,107 (SIGHS) 319 00:13:22,131 --> 00:13:23,478 He's got to be some place close. 320 00:13:23,502 --> 00:13:24,885 All right, Luca, Tan, check the office. 321 00:13:24,909 --> 00:13:27,477 See if the manager saw him go anywhere. Go. 322 00:13:32,086 --> 00:13:33,727 This receipt is from this morning. 323 00:13:34,338 --> 00:13:37,055 You ever known Buck to drop $300 on a bottle before? 324 00:13:37,079 --> 00:13:40,390 No. He never spent a penny over 15 bucks for a haircut. 325 00:13:41,971 --> 00:13:43,781 Motor oil. Fresh. 326 00:13:43,906 --> 00:13:45,651 This is where he kept his Harley. 327 00:13:45,675 --> 00:13:46,914 I never knew he rode one. 328 00:13:46,939 --> 00:13:48,661 Uh, he didn't, really. It was a collectible 329 00:13:48,686 --> 00:13:50,764 he liked working on. '46 Knucklehead. 330 00:13:51,708 --> 00:13:53,605 He was tinkering with that thing constantly. 331 00:13:53,630 --> 00:13:54,984 Said it helped him de-stress. 332 00:13:55,679 --> 00:13:58,588 So, he's drinking, driving a bike he's not used to riding. 333 00:13:58,613 --> 00:14:00,524 If he crashes with some car, it's just gonna look 334 00:14:00,549 --> 00:14:02,116 like another drunk driving accident. 335 00:14:03,025 --> 00:14:04,243 Let's go. 336 00:14:12,636 --> 00:14:14,496 Losing a loved one is never easy. 337 00:14:15,438 --> 00:14:17,617 Yeah, well, uh, 338 00:14:17,642 --> 00:14:20,198 I've had plenty of experience with that by now. 339 00:14:20,776 --> 00:14:22,395 One way or another, 340 00:14:22,558 --> 00:14:24,103 people always leave. 341 00:14:25,274 --> 00:14:26,459 I'm sorry. 342 00:14:26,807 --> 00:14:29,329 - It's okay. I can deal with it. - How? 343 00:14:29,353 --> 00:14:31,297 How do you deal with it? 344 00:14:31,506 --> 00:14:33,815 By putting it on a shelf. 345 00:14:35,832 --> 00:14:38,243 Coming back to it later when I'm ready. 346 00:14:38,495 --> 00:14:40,053 Mm, that sounds like... 347 00:14:40,077 --> 00:14:41,489 Compartmentalization? 348 00:14:42,325 --> 00:14:44,436 Yeah, I, uh, I skimmed enough of the DSM 349 00:14:44,461 --> 00:14:47,173 to know it's a common coping strategy. 350 00:14:47,604 --> 00:14:48,963 It comes with risks. 351 00:14:49,626 --> 00:14:50,729 Do you know what happens 352 00:14:50,753 --> 00:14:52,570 when you don't deal with those issues 353 00:14:52,594 --> 00:14:54,703 and the mental boxes you put your feelings in 354 00:14:54,727 --> 00:14:55,922 start to overflow? 355 00:14:55,946 --> 00:14:57,490 According to the manual, 356 00:14:58,172 --> 00:15:01,105 anxiety, depression, addiction. 357 00:15:01,129 --> 00:15:02,769 Or worse. 358 00:15:02,793 --> 00:15:05,588 You could find yourself in Buck's shoes. 359 00:15:10,687 --> 00:15:13,155 Buck always called me on my birthday. 360 00:15:16,834 --> 00:15:18,945 Every year. He never missed it. 361 00:15:18,969 --> 00:15:21,181 My own mother, she forgot more than once. 362 00:15:22,113 --> 00:15:23,683 Today 363 00:15:23,707 --> 00:15:25,491 was the first time I thought, 364 00:15:27,368 --> 00:15:29,161 "What's it gonna be like 365 00:15:30,496 --> 00:15:32,582 when I don't get that call ever again?" 366 00:15:35,119 --> 00:15:36,563 (SIGHS) 367 00:15:36,587 --> 00:15:39,213 Commander, I need a word with you in private. 368 00:15:39,990 --> 00:15:41,167 Not now. 369 00:15:41,632 --> 00:15:43,175 My office. 370 00:15:46,830 --> 00:15:48,762 - Who was that? - We'll deal with her later. 371 00:15:48,786 --> 00:15:50,373 What's the latest on Buck? 372 00:15:50,397 --> 00:15:52,912 Buck dropped $300 on a bottle of scotch today, sir. 373 00:15:52,936 --> 00:15:54,871 He didn't use cash. We got to find him soon. 374 00:15:56,147 --> 00:15:57,897 You want me to track his credit cards. 375 00:15:57,921 --> 00:16:00,034 So we can locate him in case he makes another purchase. 376 00:16:00,058 --> 00:16:01,388 It's not exactly by the book. 377 00:16:01,412 --> 00:16:04,413 Well, throw out the book. For Buck. 378 00:16:07,951 --> 00:16:09,700 Did you ever work with a Sergeant Geremias 379 00:16:09,724 --> 00:16:10,754 out of Rampart? 380 00:16:11,258 --> 00:16:12,330 No. 381 00:16:13,389 --> 00:16:16,959 I worked patrol with him way back. 382 00:16:17,861 --> 00:16:20,338 Funniest guy to ever don the uniform. 383 00:16:20,363 --> 00:16:22,841 He was always laughing and joking about something. 384 00:16:22,886 --> 00:16:24,798 Nobody saw it coming. 385 00:16:24,948 --> 00:16:27,293 Killed himself in his garage two years ago. 386 00:16:27,538 --> 00:16:28,581 His wife found him. 387 00:16:29,096 --> 00:16:31,607 It was his son's fifth birthday. 388 00:16:34,424 --> 00:16:36,703 I've been to too many cops' funerals already. 389 00:16:36,728 --> 00:16:39,273 I'll find a way to cut corners and track his credit cards. 390 00:16:39,298 --> 00:16:40,742 You bring Buck home. 391 00:16:40,767 --> 00:16:43,145 (PHONES BEEPING) 392 00:16:43,170 --> 00:16:44,748 RHD just got a line 393 00:16:44,773 --> 00:16:46,156 on the second shooter from the restaurant robbery. 394 00:16:46,181 --> 00:16:47,882 Rocker and Becker's squads are still tied up 395 00:16:47,907 --> 00:16:50,185 at the barricade at K-town. 20-Squad's got this. 396 00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:52,972 All right, RHD identified the second shooter 397 00:16:52,997 --> 00:16:54,574 as Aaron Darby. 398 00:16:54,599 --> 00:16:56,411 LKA is an apartment in Arleta. 399 00:16:56,436 --> 00:16:58,362 Any relation to the dude Street and I pancaked earlier? 400 00:16:58,387 --> 00:16:59,497 Tweaker twins. And they've got 401 00:16:59,522 --> 00:17:00,499 matching records for drug possession. 402 00:17:00,524 --> 00:17:02,235 Bet the restaurant was a cash grab 403 00:17:02,260 --> 00:17:03,342 for their next big score. 404 00:17:03,367 --> 00:17:04,508 Yeah. We're gonna make sure this is 405 00:17:04,533 --> 00:17:05,925 their last score for a long time. 406 00:17:08,479 --> 00:17:10,362 Hey. I talked to Hicks. 407 00:17:10,387 --> 00:17:12,199 We'll know the moment Buck uses his credit card. 408 00:17:12,224 --> 00:17:14,202 For now, we stay focused on the job. 409 00:17:14,227 --> 00:17:15,518 We keep it loose. 410 00:17:18,108 --> 00:17:20,275 (TIRES SCREECH) 411 00:17:28,318 --> 00:17:29,796 LAPD! 412 00:17:29,821 --> 00:17:31,028 - Give me a two! - Two! 413 00:17:31,053 --> 00:17:32,163 - Two! Two! - Two, two, two, two, two! 414 00:17:32,469 --> 00:17:33,701 - Clear! - Clear! 415 00:17:33,725 --> 00:17:35,122 Give me a two! 416 00:17:35,146 --> 00:17:36,616 TAN: Kitchen clear! 417 00:17:36,640 --> 00:17:37,784 HONDO: This is 20-David to Command. 418 00:17:37,808 --> 00:17:39,114 All clear. No sign of Darby. 419 00:17:39,138 --> 00:17:40,899 I got something. Bullet holes. 420 00:17:40,923 --> 00:17:43,456 Looks like the shots came from the other side of the wall. 421 00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:44,657 There were no reports of shots fired. 422 00:17:44,681 --> 00:17:46,424 May have happened a while ago. 423 00:17:47,633 --> 00:17:50,263 Any record of a female occupant at this address? 424 00:17:50,287 --> 00:17:51,598 No, only Darby. 425 00:17:51,622 --> 00:17:53,600 - What? - I.D. lists this address. 426 00:17:53,624 --> 00:17:55,335 Just a different unit in the building. 427 00:17:55,359 --> 00:17:56,436 Purse looks stolen. 428 00:17:56,460 --> 00:17:58,410 Darby could still be hiding next door. Let's move. 429 00:18:07,950 --> 00:18:10,131 20-David to Command. We got signs of forced entry. 430 00:18:10,156 --> 00:18:11,830 Gunshots from the adjacent unit. 431 00:18:11,855 --> 00:18:13,077 Suspect may be inside. 432 00:18:13,102 --> 00:18:14,585 Making entry. 433 00:18:16,927 --> 00:18:19,505 (TV PLAYING QUIETLY) 434 00:18:19,530 --> 00:18:20,750 TAN: Clear! 435 00:18:21,058 --> 00:18:22,158 HONDO: Closet clear. 436 00:18:31,061 --> 00:18:32,628 Get out of here. 437 00:18:34,264 --> 00:18:35,806 I'll call it in. 438 00:18:48,773 --> 00:18:49,912 WENDY: Victor. 439 00:18:51,547 --> 00:18:53,157 Victor? 440 00:18:53,597 --> 00:18:56,535 What was it about that stuffed animal that caught your eye? 441 00:18:58,321 --> 00:19:00,143 It reminded me of a teddy bear 442 00:19:00,168 --> 00:19:02,208 that I got my niece a couple years ago. 443 00:19:03,490 --> 00:19:04,818 Yeah, she loved that thing. 444 00:19:04,842 --> 00:19:07,140 Called it her Rexy Bear. 445 00:19:07,164 --> 00:19:08,374 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 446 00:19:08,398 --> 00:19:10,698 And all I could do was picture my niece 447 00:19:10,722 --> 00:19:12,902 lying in that baby's place. 448 00:19:13,937 --> 00:19:16,991 And think about how badly I wanted to kill 449 00:19:17,015 --> 00:19:20,304 the bastard who did that to that mom and kid. 450 00:19:20,328 --> 00:19:21,654 It's completely normal to feel that way 451 00:19:21,678 --> 00:19:23,979 given what you witnessed today. 452 00:19:25,888 --> 00:19:28,109 And we could tell by the way their bodies were... 453 00:19:29,305 --> 00:19:33,274 that the mom died trying to protect her little girl. 454 00:19:35,559 --> 00:19:37,660 (SIGHS) My girlfriend Bonnie... 455 00:19:37,947 --> 00:19:41,049 we talk about getting married, having kids. 456 00:19:42,285 --> 00:19:44,086 But on days like this, I... 457 00:19:47,043 --> 00:19:48,879 We see a lot of heinous crap. 458 00:19:49,091 --> 00:19:51,423 And I can brush most of it off, but... 459 00:19:52,094 --> 00:19:53,592 what we saw today, 460 00:19:54,992 --> 00:19:56,637 that's gonna stay with me. 461 00:19:56,662 --> 00:19:59,198 Have you thought about exploring these feelings with Bonnie? 462 00:19:59,765 --> 00:20:01,894 I don't want to put that on her. 463 00:20:01,918 --> 00:20:03,482 You know, it's not fair to dirty her up 464 00:20:03,506 --> 00:20:05,241 with the worst stuff I see on this job. 465 00:20:05,265 --> 00:20:07,241 So how do you usually cope? 466 00:20:07,265 --> 00:20:10,901 On bad days, usually go to my gym after work. 467 00:20:10,926 --> 00:20:13,737 Play pickup ball till I can't feel my legs. 468 00:20:14,170 --> 00:20:15,547 I can't really explain it, but it works. 469 00:20:15,572 --> 00:20:18,340 That's healthier than other options. 470 00:20:21,036 --> 00:20:23,105 Do you want to talk about Buck? 471 00:20:24,541 --> 00:20:25,624 Not really. 472 00:20:26,355 --> 00:20:28,377 (SIGHS) I think I'll save that for the gym. 473 00:20:28,892 --> 00:20:30,693 ♪ 474 00:20:35,852 --> 00:20:37,094 (PANTING SOFTLY) 475 00:20:48,981 --> 00:20:51,150 Just trying to get the blood off. 476 00:20:51,515 --> 00:20:53,652 Last I checked, soap works better than steel. 477 00:20:53,923 --> 00:20:55,557 Yeah. 478 00:20:59,849 --> 00:21:01,035 All that... 479 00:21:02,179 --> 00:21:03,287 for what? 480 00:21:03,672 --> 00:21:07,175 So, uh, some junkie can score some cash? 481 00:21:08,358 --> 00:21:09,789 We should've been in that house sooner. 482 00:21:09,814 --> 00:21:12,444 Darby killed that family long before we even knew his name. 483 00:21:12,469 --> 00:21:14,398 Nobody could've stopped it. 484 00:21:14,423 --> 00:21:16,150 No one? Not even a neighbor? 485 00:21:16,193 --> 00:21:20,280 Or a coworker or-or a loved one or-or the friggin' mailman? 486 00:21:20,304 --> 00:21:24,028 Someone had to see or hear something. Someone! 487 00:21:24,052 --> 00:21:26,352 We can't save everybody, Street. 488 00:21:27,311 --> 00:21:30,072 Buck drilled that into me from day one. 489 00:21:33,369 --> 00:21:34,902 I know. Me, too. 490 00:21:38,181 --> 00:21:40,393 (SIGHS) 491 00:21:40,824 --> 00:21:42,826 How did we miss this? 492 00:21:43,112 --> 00:21:46,091 How did we miss how much he was hurting? 493 00:21:46,556 --> 00:21:49,014 He was too proud to show us any signs. 494 00:21:49,038 --> 00:21:52,715 Was he? Or did we just not want to see it 495 00:21:52,739 --> 00:21:56,749 'cause we don't want to deal with-with our stuff head-on? 496 00:21:56,773 --> 00:21:58,697 Straight out of the academy, we are taught 497 00:21:58,721 --> 00:22:01,470 not to wear our emotions on our sleeves. 498 00:22:02,197 --> 00:22:04,075 The last thing you want is some bad guy 499 00:22:04,100 --> 00:22:06,030 to see fear in your eyes while you're on a beat. 500 00:22:06,055 --> 00:22:08,037 That is how you become a target. 501 00:22:09,665 --> 00:22:12,690 Over time, you just get really good at hiding everything. 502 00:22:15,811 --> 00:22:17,856 Sometimes too good, I guess. 503 00:22:17,881 --> 00:22:19,158 (SIGHS SOFTLY) 504 00:22:19,183 --> 00:22:20,823 I just lost my brother. 505 00:22:21,544 --> 00:22:24,323 I can't handle losing Buck now, too. 506 00:22:25,661 --> 00:22:28,831 That is why we have to find him. 507 00:22:33,003 --> 00:22:35,581 Sergeant Harrelson, need a minute of your time. 508 00:22:35,605 --> 00:22:36,739 I don't have a minute. 509 00:22:37,172 --> 00:22:38,924 No one around here seems to. 510 00:22:39,148 --> 00:22:42,127 My client would like to make a donation on your behalf. 511 00:22:42,152 --> 00:22:44,097 - A donation? - Mm-hmm. 512 00:22:44,122 --> 00:22:45,476 - To who? - To SWAT, 513 00:22:45,501 --> 00:22:47,225 or to a charity of your choice. 514 00:22:47,449 --> 00:22:48,826 Who is the client? 515 00:22:48,851 --> 00:22:50,496 I've been instructed not to say. 516 00:22:50,521 --> 00:22:52,398 All right, you tell your client to soldier up 517 00:22:52,423 --> 00:22:53,981 and make the decision himself. 518 00:22:54,777 --> 00:22:57,979 It's a one million dollar donation. 519 00:22:59,255 --> 00:23:00,582 (CHUCKLES) 520 00:23:00,607 --> 00:23:03,753 Okay. What's this really about? 521 00:23:03,778 --> 00:23:06,790 I can't say, but I can guarantee 522 00:23:06,815 --> 00:23:09,261 that this gesture comes from the best of places. 523 00:23:09,286 --> 00:23:10,763 TAN: Hey, Hondo? 524 00:23:10,788 --> 00:23:12,466 We got something. Can I talk to you? 525 00:23:12,875 --> 00:23:14,452 I'm sorry. I can't accept. 526 00:23:14,477 --> 00:23:15,855 Not until I know who the client is and why 527 00:23:15,880 --> 00:23:18,625 they are allegedly willing to drop seven figures. 528 00:23:18,650 --> 00:23:21,129 - Trevor, see her out. - We just got a hit 529 00:23:21,154 --> 00:23:23,299 on Buck's credit card at a diner out in Castaic. 530 00:23:23,324 --> 00:23:24,601 You got a number for the place? 531 00:23:24,626 --> 00:23:26,738 - Yeah, just sent it to you. - (PHONE CHIMES) 532 00:23:27,149 --> 00:23:28,827 All right, Deacon's the closest. 533 00:23:28,852 --> 00:23:31,018 Get him the address, tell him to get there ASAP, 534 00:23:31,043 --> 00:23:33,062 - and I'll meet him as soon as I can. - Yeah. 535 00:23:36,366 --> 00:23:38,400 WOMAN: Okay. 536 00:23:39,369 --> 00:23:40,932 (REGISTER BELL DINGS) 537 00:23:40,956 --> 00:23:43,293 Uh, Mr. Spivey, there's a phone call for you. 538 00:23:43,317 --> 00:23:45,384 What? That's, uh... that's got to be a mistake. 539 00:23:45,408 --> 00:23:46,652 No one knows I'm here. 540 00:23:46,676 --> 00:23:47,718 He said it's important. 541 00:23:48,827 --> 00:23:50,537 Okay. Thanks. 542 00:23:51,381 --> 00:23:53,426 (SIGHS) Hello? 543 00:23:53,450 --> 00:23:55,372 HONDO: Buck. I'm so glad to hear your voice. 544 00:23:55,986 --> 00:23:57,728 Hondo, what do you want? 545 00:23:57,753 --> 00:23:59,328 I'm just calling to check in on you. 546 00:23:59,353 --> 00:24:01,016 Yeah, it's, uh, not a good time. 547 00:24:01,041 --> 00:24:02,067 Listen. 548 00:24:02,092 --> 00:24:04,270 Just stay right there. 549 00:24:04,294 --> 00:24:06,339 And I'll come see you, and we can have that meal we've been 550 00:24:06,363 --> 00:24:07,352 trying to schedule. 551 00:24:07,376 --> 00:24:09,761 Rain check, okay? I, uh, I got to go. 552 00:24:09,785 --> 00:24:11,517 No, wait. Buck, wait. 553 00:24:13,376 --> 00:24:17,189 Buck... are you thinking about killing yourself? 554 00:24:22,979 --> 00:24:26,740 Look, I never blamed you, Hondo, for anything. 555 00:24:27,183 --> 00:24:28,575 I hope you know that. 556 00:24:29,285 --> 00:24:30,452 (PHONE BEEPS) 557 00:24:30,767 --> 00:24:32,830 No, Buck. Buck! 558 00:24:36,917 --> 00:24:37,981 Thanks, Gia. 559 00:24:38,005 --> 00:24:39,378 You're welcome. 560 00:24:49,335 --> 00:24:51,056 I was just hoping we were wrong... 561 00:24:53,005 --> 00:24:54,272 Buck was fine. 562 00:24:57,777 --> 00:24:59,565 I didn't want it to be real. 563 00:25:02,860 --> 00:25:04,987 But deep down, I suppose, I, uh... 564 00:25:06,519 --> 00:25:08,196 I knew he was struggling. 565 00:25:08,220 --> 00:25:10,632 Denial is easier than confrontation. 566 00:25:10,656 --> 00:25:11,727 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 567 00:25:11,751 --> 00:25:13,280 Confronting people is part of the job description. 568 00:25:13,304 --> 00:25:14,606 Mine, too. 569 00:25:14,630 --> 00:25:16,905 But this wasn't just anybody. 570 00:25:16,929 --> 00:25:19,030 It was somebody you loved and respected. 571 00:25:20,697 --> 00:25:23,028 I was afraid of damaging my relationship with Buck. 572 00:25:23,052 --> 00:25:26,416 I thought he might hate me if I brought it up, 573 00:25:26,441 --> 00:25:28,468 and he'd think I was calling him weak. 574 00:25:30,904 --> 00:25:33,839 I just don't get how he fell so far so fast. 575 00:25:37,356 --> 00:25:39,123 I mean, what did I miss? 576 00:25:42,374 --> 00:25:43,859 The Raymont Harris shooting? 577 00:25:46,385 --> 00:25:47,738 His divorce? 578 00:25:49,595 --> 00:25:51,006 (SIGHS) 579 00:25:51,030 --> 00:25:52,263 The chronic pain? 580 00:25:55,360 --> 00:25:57,662 Not being on SWAT anymore? 581 00:26:02,541 --> 00:26:04,087 And the loneliness. 582 00:26:04,844 --> 00:26:08,957 No one moment can lead to self-harm. 583 00:26:08,981 --> 00:26:12,260 It's a buildup of many issues over time. 584 00:26:12,284 --> 00:26:14,222 Physical and emotional traumas. 585 00:26:14,247 --> 00:26:15,773 Buck saw more than his fair share of trauma. 586 00:26:15,797 --> 00:26:17,587 - That's for damn sure. - You all do. 587 00:26:17,611 --> 00:26:20,569 Look at what you and your team experienced today. 588 00:26:20,979 --> 00:26:24,029 A one-year-old with a gunshot wound to her face, 589 00:26:24,053 --> 00:26:27,346 a mom trying to protect her, shot multiple times in the back. 590 00:26:27,393 --> 00:26:30,154 I can't even think of anything more awful. 591 00:26:30,447 --> 00:26:32,880 Traumatic incidents like that are part of the reason 592 00:26:32,904 --> 00:26:37,137 why cops have elevated rates of PTSD, depression... 593 00:26:37,161 --> 00:26:38,877 And suicide. 594 00:26:41,233 --> 00:26:43,411 I know we're more likely to kill ourselves 595 00:26:43,436 --> 00:26:45,204 than to die in the line of duty. 596 00:26:47,547 --> 00:26:48,966 But how do we fix it? 597 00:26:51,470 --> 00:26:55,222 I wish I had a simple answer for that, but there just isn't one. 598 00:26:59,999 --> 00:27:02,010 Deacon got to the diner within minutes, 599 00:27:02,034 --> 00:27:03,660 - but there was no sign of Buck. - (DEVICE BEEPS) 600 00:27:03,684 --> 00:27:05,313 He must have left right after he hung up. 601 00:27:05,337 --> 00:27:07,968 I don't know. Maybe I screwed up by calling him. 602 00:27:07,992 --> 00:27:10,105 He'd used his credit card. He was already on his way out. 603 00:27:10,129 --> 00:27:12,609 This way, he knows we're looking for him and we care. 604 00:27:12,633 --> 00:27:14,658 Or it might make him go through with it faster. 605 00:27:15,114 --> 00:27:16,929 These are the places Buck used his credit card 606 00:27:16,953 --> 00:27:18,409 in the last 24 hours: 607 00:27:18,433 --> 00:27:21,096 the diner in Castaic, a gas station in Stevenson Ranch 608 00:27:21,120 --> 00:27:22,478 and a liquor store in North Hollywood. 609 00:27:22,502 --> 00:27:23,907 Okay, the storage spot was right here. 610 00:27:23,931 --> 00:27:26,201 Looks like he got the booze, picked up his bike, 611 00:27:26,225 --> 00:27:27,882 filled his tank on the way to Castaic. 612 00:27:27,906 --> 00:27:29,621 Hey, I just got off the phone with Jenny. 613 00:27:29,645 --> 00:27:31,973 Castaic Diner was Buck's favorite breakfast spot. 614 00:27:31,997 --> 00:27:33,341 I knew I recognized it. 615 00:27:33,365 --> 00:27:34,739 They stopped there every time they went camping. 616 00:27:34,763 --> 00:27:37,212 At Castaic Lake. That's where Buck loves fishing. 617 00:27:37,236 --> 00:27:39,014 Castaic's only, like, 15 miles from that diner. 618 00:27:39,038 --> 00:27:40,615 You think that's where he's headed? 619 00:27:40,639 --> 00:27:43,104 Get the coordinates to Deac. Street and I will meet him. 620 00:27:43,128 --> 00:27:44,341 (ALARM BEEPING) 621 00:27:44,365 --> 00:27:45,754 You got to be kidding. 622 00:27:45,778 --> 00:27:47,549 A BOLO hit on Aaron Darby 623 00:27:47,573 --> 00:27:48,924 at his cousin's place in City Terrace. 624 00:27:48,948 --> 00:27:51,048 Rocker and Becker's squads still in K-Town. 625 00:27:51,072 --> 00:27:52,654 20-Squad's still up. 626 00:27:53,052 --> 00:27:54,896 All right, grab whoever's available downstairs 627 00:27:54,920 --> 00:27:56,020 to fill up the squad. 628 00:27:56,044 --> 00:27:58,034 - Let's go get this bastard. - What about Buck? 629 00:27:59,191 --> 00:28:01,580 We just got to have faith that Deac's gonna find him. 630 00:28:06,418 --> 00:28:08,143 (GLASS BREAKS, FLASHBANG GRENADE BOOMS) 631 00:28:08,167 --> 00:28:09,284 (GROANS) 632 00:28:09,308 --> 00:28:10,730 - LAPD! - CHRIS: Go! 633 00:28:11,971 --> 00:28:14,063 Stay down! Where's Darby?! 634 00:28:14,087 --> 00:28:15,794 Get down! 635 00:28:15,818 --> 00:28:17,088 (THUMPING UPSTAIRS) 636 00:28:17,112 --> 00:28:19,310 Chris, upstairs. Move! 637 00:28:23,989 --> 00:28:25,723 LAPD! 638 00:28:30,489 --> 00:28:31,978 CHRIS: 24-David! Shots fired. 639 00:28:32,002 --> 00:28:34,420 Suspect's outside, heading eastbound on foot. 640 00:28:34,444 --> 00:28:36,094 (SIREN WAILING) 641 00:28:36,929 --> 00:28:38,293 (TIRES SCREECH, WOMAN SCREAMS) 642 00:28:38,317 --> 00:28:40,031 (SIREN WAILING) 643 00:28:44,002 --> 00:28:46,041 25-David in pursuit! 644 00:29:00,586 --> 00:29:03,732 26-David. Suspect over the wall into the alley. Lost visual. 645 00:29:03,756 --> 00:29:06,019 HONDO: Stay on him. I'm on my way. 646 00:29:13,098 --> 00:29:14,432 (GRUNTING, TIRES SCREECH) 647 00:29:17,644 --> 00:29:19,211 HONDO: He jumped out in front of me. 648 00:29:19,235 --> 00:29:20,504 (GROANS) 649 00:29:20,528 --> 00:29:22,369 Don't give me another reason to pull this trigger. 650 00:29:23,203 --> 00:29:25,020 Give me your hands. 651 00:29:25,044 --> 00:29:27,111 (PHONE VIBRATING) 652 00:29:29,209 --> 00:29:30,659 Deacon, what do you got? 653 00:29:30,683 --> 00:29:32,083 I found Buck. 654 00:29:33,886 --> 00:29:35,230 I'm gonna engage. 655 00:29:35,255 --> 00:29:36,533 I'll send you the coordinates now. 656 00:29:36,558 --> 00:29:37,758 Be there as fast as we can. 657 00:29:45,971 --> 00:29:47,772 How's it going, Buck? 658 00:29:49,327 --> 00:29:50,855 (GROANS) 659 00:29:51,437 --> 00:29:53,415 Had better days, Deac. 660 00:29:54,025 --> 00:29:55,235 I hear that. 661 00:29:55,908 --> 00:29:57,619 Me, too. 662 00:29:57,643 --> 00:30:00,004 (SIGHS) 663 00:30:00,028 --> 00:30:02,009 Something happen today that make you want to hurt yourself? 664 00:30:02,033 --> 00:30:03,381 That's close enough. 665 00:30:07,753 --> 00:30:09,749 I remember you talking about this place. 666 00:30:10,623 --> 00:30:11,835 It's beautiful. 667 00:30:12,624 --> 00:30:15,255 It's a bit of a hike to get up here. 668 00:30:16,261 --> 00:30:18,341 I know this routine, Deac. 669 00:30:19,298 --> 00:30:22,095 Build an empathy, rapport, influence. 670 00:30:22,388 --> 00:30:24,689 The Behavioral Change Stairway? 671 00:30:26,585 --> 00:30:28,452 I taught it to you. 672 00:30:30,770 --> 00:30:32,487 Do you have a weapon? 673 00:30:32,897 --> 00:30:34,691 What do you think? 674 00:30:38,250 --> 00:30:40,818 I need to know why you want to kill yourself. 675 00:30:41,687 --> 00:30:43,906 Well, because, Deac, 676 00:30:43,930 --> 00:30:47,068 eventually, a man just outlives his usefulness, 677 00:30:47,704 --> 00:30:50,195 and then there's just no point. 678 00:30:51,625 --> 00:30:53,010 No point to what? 679 00:30:53,034 --> 00:30:56,467 To pretending anymore, Deac, just to any of it. 680 00:30:58,971 --> 00:30:59,986 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 681 00:31:00,011 --> 00:31:01,635 Buck, there's always a point. 682 00:31:03,615 --> 00:31:06,350 I'm here. Let's just... let's just work this out together. 683 00:31:07,692 --> 00:31:09,036 I've made up my mind, Deac. 684 00:31:10,518 --> 00:31:13,063 You should go home to Annie and the kids. 685 00:31:13,652 --> 00:31:16,320 This is happening, and I don't want you to see it. 686 00:31:22,489 --> 00:31:23,865 Go home, Deac. 687 00:31:26,594 --> 00:31:28,613 DEACON: I know things are bad right now. 688 00:31:28,637 --> 00:31:29,970 I know, and I-I just, I... 689 00:31:30,991 --> 00:31:32,887 I think I can help you if you just talk to me. 690 00:31:32,911 --> 00:31:36,075 Deac, I've been saying it for the last 30 minutes, man. 691 00:31:36,099 --> 00:31:37,343 I'm done talking. 692 00:31:37,367 --> 00:31:39,211 I'm just done talking, all right? 693 00:31:39,235 --> 00:31:40,979 Please just go. 694 00:31:41,003 --> 00:31:42,204 Please just... 695 00:31:45,827 --> 00:31:47,628 You called in the cavalry? 696 00:31:48,512 --> 00:31:50,356 - Stop! - Hey, hey. 697 00:31:50,813 --> 00:31:52,901 If you're here to tell me that I'm making a big mistake, 698 00:31:52,925 --> 00:31:54,536 don't bother, all right? You're wasting your time. 699 00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:55,891 Buck, you are worth our time. 700 00:31:55,915 --> 00:31:58,024 No, I'm not worth your time. 701 00:31:59,031 --> 00:32:00,542 I used to be. 702 00:32:00,566 --> 00:32:01,923 You know, but now I'm just... 703 00:32:01,947 --> 00:32:04,746 I'm a, I'm a shell of myself, guys. 704 00:32:04,770 --> 00:32:07,038 I mean, come on. You see it. 705 00:32:09,355 --> 00:32:11,466 You brought us into 20-Squad. 706 00:32:12,205 --> 00:32:14,630 And it was you that taught us you don't leave a man behind. 707 00:32:14,654 --> 00:32:16,491 We're not gonna, we're not gonna start that today. 708 00:32:16,515 --> 00:32:18,794 Oh, my 20-Squad's finished. It's not me anymore. 709 00:32:18,818 --> 00:32:20,431 Of course it is, Buck. You're still one of us, man. 710 00:32:20,455 --> 00:32:22,831 No, no, Hondo, I'm not one of you. 711 00:32:23,288 --> 00:32:25,956 I'm not one of you guys anymore. 712 00:32:28,012 --> 00:32:30,339 I was, I was barely keeping it together 713 00:32:30,363 --> 00:32:32,934 before I... before I shot Raymont. 714 00:32:34,519 --> 00:32:36,645 I lost, I lost my Jenny. 715 00:32:36,669 --> 00:32:37,910 I lost SWAT. 716 00:32:38,606 --> 00:32:40,949 I-I can't, I can't sleep. 717 00:32:40,973 --> 00:32:43,685 My knees, my back, on fire. 718 00:32:44,070 --> 00:32:45,621 Every day. 719 00:32:45,645 --> 00:32:48,992 Everything just feels so... just heavy. 720 00:32:50,070 --> 00:32:52,454 I can't even count the nights that I just 721 00:32:52,652 --> 00:32:55,697 hope and I pray that the lights up here would just go out, 722 00:32:55,721 --> 00:32:58,209 you know, just so that the pain would just go away. 723 00:33:00,253 --> 00:33:01,870 I'm tired, man. I'm sick of it. 724 00:33:01,894 --> 00:33:04,940 I'm sick of hoping and I'm sick of waiting for this. 725 00:33:04,964 --> 00:33:06,731 There's ways of getting better, man, and you know that. 726 00:33:08,934 --> 00:33:10,545 I don't, I don't care. 727 00:33:11,055 --> 00:33:12,547 I don't care if there are, man. 728 00:33:12,571 --> 00:33:15,884 I'm just... I'm done. 729 00:33:15,908 --> 00:33:17,265 I'm done, Hondo. 730 00:33:17,289 --> 00:33:19,221 I know you're in a lot of pain. 731 00:33:19,245 --> 00:33:22,173 And that's why you can't see how losing you is gonna hurt us. 732 00:33:22,197 --> 00:33:23,977 You've been fine without me. 733 00:33:24,002 --> 00:33:25,594 You'll be fine. 734 00:33:25,618 --> 00:33:26,895 I won't. 735 00:33:27,552 --> 00:33:28,796 Buck, 736 00:33:28,990 --> 00:33:32,184 if you didn't come into my life, I don't know where I'd be. 737 00:33:32,208 --> 00:33:34,704 I-I d... I don't even know if I'd be alive right now. 738 00:33:37,169 --> 00:33:40,793 Buck, you are the closest thing I ever had to a father. 739 00:33:45,131 --> 00:33:46,882 What about Lila and Matthew? 740 00:33:47,550 --> 00:33:49,217 What am I gonna tell them when they ask how their uncle died? 741 00:33:49,241 --> 00:33:50,452 What am I supposed to say? 742 00:33:50,476 --> 00:33:51,943 You think that's a conversation I want to have? 743 00:33:54,127 --> 00:33:56,893 So much of what we have achieved is because of you. 744 00:33:58,250 --> 00:33:59,938 Don't do this to us. 745 00:34:00,453 --> 00:34:02,864 Don't make us live in a world without you. 746 00:34:02,888 --> 00:34:04,866 (SIGHS) 747 00:34:04,890 --> 00:34:06,691 ♪ 748 00:34:14,367 --> 00:34:16,768 (STIFLED CRYING) 749 00:34:22,041 --> 00:34:23,919 (INHALES) 750 00:34:23,943 --> 00:34:25,255 (SOBS SOFTLY) 751 00:34:28,013 --> 00:34:29,814 ♪ 752 00:34:40,292 --> 00:34:42,938 (SIGHS) 753 00:34:42,962 --> 00:34:44,339 (CRYING): I'm sorry. 754 00:34:44,363 --> 00:34:46,731 (WHISPERS): Oh, it's okay. 755 00:34:49,902 --> 00:34:51,045 WENDY: I've set Buck up 756 00:34:51,070 --> 00:34:52,715 with a colleague, Dr. Kurt Derrian. 757 00:34:52,740 --> 00:34:54,818 He's a former cop turned psychologist. 758 00:34:54,842 --> 00:34:56,689 He'll get Buck and where he's coming from. 759 00:34:56,713 --> 00:34:57,809 Sounds perfect. 760 00:34:57,833 --> 00:34:58,869 Buck all set at home? 761 00:34:58,893 --> 00:35:00,781 Well, the team's gonna be staying with him in shifts, 762 00:35:00,805 --> 00:35:02,375 - keeping him company. - Good. 763 00:35:02,399 --> 00:35:04,836 It's a long road ahead, but we'll get him the help he needs. 764 00:35:05,015 --> 00:35:07,285 Chris is first up for her psych debrief. 765 00:35:07,310 --> 00:35:08,932 I'll see you for yours in about an hour. 766 00:35:08,957 --> 00:35:10,617 Yes, you will. 767 00:35:11,092 --> 00:35:12,619 (EXHALES) 768 00:35:13,611 --> 00:35:15,196 Finally. 769 00:35:15,221 --> 00:35:17,720 Othella Baker. 770 00:35:17,744 --> 00:35:19,820 Wait a minute. You're her client? 771 00:35:19,844 --> 00:35:20,995 I have to say, Sergeant, 772 00:35:21,019 --> 00:35:23,585 I have never in my life had so much trouble 773 00:35:23,609 --> 00:35:25,309 giving away a million dollars. 774 00:35:25,333 --> 00:35:28,459 Okay, I am really confused. What is going on here, exactly? 775 00:35:28,985 --> 00:35:32,196 I was convinced I was gonna die last week, 776 00:35:32,663 --> 00:35:34,919 when that gunman had me on the hotel rooftop. 777 00:35:34,944 --> 00:35:36,043 Mm-hmm. 778 00:35:36,068 --> 00:35:37,279 And then you saved me. 779 00:35:37,304 --> 00:35:38,581 It was a team effort. 780 00:35:38,606 --> 00:35:40,072 There was a lot of us out there chipping in. 781 00:35:40,097 --> 00:35:42,320 But it was your hand that grabbed me, 782 00:35:42,706 --> 00:35:44,384 kept me from falling. 783 00:35:44,408 --> 00:35:48,421 You know that corny saying, "Wake up and smell the roses"? 784 00:35:48,445 --> 00:35:49,881 (BOTH CHUCKLE) 785 00:35:49,987 --> 00:35:52,425 Well, I do that now. 786 00:35:52,983 --> 00:35:55,362 One big whiff every morning, 787 00:35:55,573 --> 00:35:57,764 and it makes my whole damn day. 788 00:35:57,888 --> 00:35:58,865 (CHUCKLES) 789 00:35:58,890 --> 00:35:59,934 I want to pay it forward. 790 00:35:59,959 --> 00:36:01,069 You really don't have to do that. 791 00:36:01,094 --> 00:36:03,003 I know, but I'm going to anyway. 792 00:36:03,028 --> 00:36:03,976 (CHUCKLES) 793 00:36:04,000 --> 00:36:06,451 Now, I just need the name of a worthy charity 794 00:36:06,475 --> 00:36:08,331 that you believe in. 795 00:36:11,321 --> 00:36:12,755 What's up, guys? 796 00:36:15,032 --> 00:36:16,376 (SIGHS) 797 00:36:16,740 --> 00:36:18,785 You missed all the fun. 798 00:36:18,810 --> 00:36:21,288 There was three inches of water when I got here. 799 00:36:21,313 --> 00:36:24,292 Baby, I had plenty of fun today myself. 800 00:36:24,317 --> 00:36:25,995 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 801 00:36:26,020 --> 00:36:27,297 - (CHUCKLES) - Mmm. 802 00:36:27,322 --> 00:36:29,701 (INHALES DEEPLY) 803 00:36:29,726 --> 00:36:31,136 Mmm. 804 00:36:31,161 --> 00:36:32,505 How's Buck? 805 00:36:33,366 --> 00:36:34,592 He's all right. 806 00:36:35,059 --> 00:36:36,427 For now. 807 00:36:37,895 --> 00:36:39,839 Here, let me help you out. 808 00:36:40,348 --> 00:36:43,777 It's gonna be about five grand to fix the water damage. 809 00:36:43,801 --> 00:36:45,111 Five grand, huh? 810 00:36:45,135 --> 00:36:48,025 No idea how I'm gonna raise the funds for it. 811 00:36:48,049 --> 00:36:49,991 Maybe a cook-off or something. 812 00:36:50,015 --> 00:36:52,519 I do make a mean chili gumbo. (CHUCKLES) 813 00:36:52,543 --> 00:36:55,244 (CHUCKLES) 814 00:36:56,674 --> 00:36:58,491 Would a half a million dollars do it? 815 00:36:58,642 --> 00:37:00,618 Oh, yeah. I think that'll cover most of it. 816 00:37:00,643 --> 00:37:02,623 Baby, I am so serious. 817 00:37:02,648 --> 00:37:03,925 - About what? - Tomorrow, 818 00:37:03,950 --> 00:37:07,096 you are gonna get a check from an anonymous donor 819 00:37:07,121 --> 00:37:10,567 for $500,000 820 00:37:10,592 --> 00:37:11,936 to this community center. 821 00:37:12,262 --> 00:37:14,274 It's gonna allow you to do everything 822 00:37:14,298 --> 00:37:16,076 you've been talking about for these kids. 823 00:37:16,100 --> 00:37:17,769 Are you for real right now? 824 00:37:17,793 --> 00:37:19,746 As real as a heart attack. 825 00:37:19,770 --> 00:37:21,147 Uh, wait a minute. 826 00:37:21,171 --> 00:37:22,115 (BOTH CHUCKLE) 827 00:37:22,139 --> 00:37:23,328 Who's giving us this money? 828 00:37:23,352 --> 00:37:25,393 She made me promise I wouldn't tell anybody. 829 00:37:25,417 --> 00:37:27,354 - "She"? - Okay, oops, I've already said too much. 830 00:37:27,378 --> 00:37:29,221 You ain't getting nothing else out of me. 831 00:37:29,245 --> 00:37:31,157 - Okay. (CHUCKLES) - (CHUCKLES) 832 00:37:31,181 --> 00:37:33,883 You better not be playing with me here. 833 00:37:34,830 --> 00:37:36,279 How the hell did this happen? 834 00:37:36,347 --> 00:37:38,058 A million-dollar donation is coming, 835 00:37:38,083 --> 00:37:39,527 courtesy of someone SWAT helped. 836 00:37:39,957 --> 00:37:43,370 And half of it's going to the LAPD Suicide Prevention Fund. 837 00:37:43,394 --> 00:37:45,772 And the other half is coming right here. 838 00:37:45,796 --> 00:37:47,010 (EXHALES) 839 00:37:47,034 --> 00:37:48,499 Oh, my God. 840 00:37:49,867 --> 00:37:52,044 There was a time when I was lost, 841 00:37:52,637 --> 00:37:54,448 and Buck helped me get back on track. 842 00:37:55,298 --> 00:37:58,184 You're doing the same thing for the kids who come through here. 843 00:37:59,051 --> 00:38:01,095 You're giving 'em a sense of purpose, 844 00:38:01,512 --> 00:38:02,764 of belonging. 845 00:38:03,247 --> 00:38:04,524 It's important. 846 00:38:04,548 --> 00:38:06,044 I know. (EXHALES) 847 00:38:06,068 --> 00:38:08,350 Maybe what you're doing will make it easier for them 848 00:38:08,374 --> 00:38:10,159 than it is for some of us. 849 00:38:11,356 --> 00:38:12,465 (CHUCKLES) 850 00:38:12,489 --> 00:38:14,457 - (CHUCKLES) - Oh. 851 00:38:18,195 --> 00:38:20,990 Honestly, I'm not a big fan of debriefings. 852 00:38:23,267 --> 00:38:25,274 (CLEARS THROAT) People tend to come to me with their problems, 853 00:38:25,298 --> 00:38:26,601 not the other way around. 854 00:38:26,625 --> 00:38:28,548 Who listens when you have a problem? 855 00:38:28,572 --> 00:38:30,166 My wife. 856 00:38:32,795 --> 00:38:34,263 God. 857 00:38:36,088 --> 00:38:38,174 Growing up Catholic, you, uh... 858 00:38:38,562 --> 00:38:40,426 you learn to roll with the punches. 859 00:38:40,918 --> 00:38:42,486 You don't complain. 860 00:38:42,511 --> 00:38:44,456 So it's okay for others to unload their feelings 861 00:38:44,501 --> 00:38:45,945 but not you? 862 00:38:46,336 --> 00:38:48,604 Seems like a bit of a double standard. 863 00:38:51,270 --> 00:38:52,980 Everything I say... 864 00:38:54,440 --> 00:38:56,242 stays in this room? 865 00:38:56,266 --> 00:38:57,610 Of course. 866 00:39:05,022 --> 00:39:06,661 Seeing Buck today... 867 00:39:08,211 --> 00:39:09,580 terrified me. 868 00:39:09,605 --> 00:39:11,883 The fear of losing someone you care about 869 00:39:11,908 --> 00:39:13,476 can be paralyzing. 870 00:39:16,747 --> 00:39:18,047 No. 871 00:39:20,511 --> 00:39:22,176 It terrified me, 872 00:39:23,794 --> 00:39:25,513 because, in that moment, 873 00:39:27,077 --> 00:39:31,547 I understood exactly where Buck was coming from. 874 00:39:35,539 --> 00:39:36,899 I, uh... 875 00:39:37,835 --> 00:39:40,871 I hit a low point last year. 876 00:39:43,814 --> 00:39:45,116 There were... 877 00:39:46,156 --> 00:39:48,286 money problems and... 878 00:39:49,632 --> 00:39:51,289 family problems. 879 00:39:53,570 --> 00:39:55,001 And I was working... 880 00:39:57,834 --> 00:39:59,255 I was working my tail off. 881 00:40:02,019 --> 00:40:04,468 I was exhausted all the time. 882 00:40:09,046 --> 00:40:10,391 And, uh... 883 00:40:14,544 --> 00:40:15,980 I just felt like 884 00:40:16,460 --> 00:40:20,067 I was failing everyone a-around me. 885 00:40:23,039 --> 00:40:24,550 Like I was failing myself. 886 00:40:24,575 --> 00:40:25,775 (CRYING SOFTLY) 887 00:40:31,768 --> 00:40:33,245 One day, I... 888 00:40:34,498 --> 00:40:36,799 I looked at my gun. 889 00:40:40,296 --> 00:40:41,596 I saw a way out. 890 00:40:41,620 --> 00:40:43,549 I just thought it would be easier, 891 00:40:44,394 --> 00:40:45,760 it'd be... 892 00:40:46,022 --> 00:40:49,058 better for everyone around me, somehow. 893 00:40:51,734 --> 00:40:54,310 Do you still think about taking your life, David? 894 00:40:56,640 --> 00:40:57,818 No. 895 00:40:58,041 --> 00:41:00,586 I don't. Not once... since then. 896 00:41:00,611 --> 00:41:02,011 No. 897 00:41:06,409 --> 00:41:08,410 And seeing Buck like that... 898 00:41:10,814 --> 00:41:13,249 ...in that dark place... 899 00:41:17,583 --> 00:41:20,353 ...made me realize how much I have to lose. 900 00:41:21,629 --> 00:41:25,258 I admire the courage it took for you to tell me that. 901 00:41:25,588 --> 00:41:27,093 (EXHALES) 902 00:41:32,181 --> 00:41:33,516 Do you think... 903 00:41:36,519 --> 00:41:38,813 You think maybe we can make this a... 904 00:41:40,543 --> 00:41:42,775 a semi-regular thing? 905 00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:44,151 I'd like that. 65036

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.