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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,967 --> 00:00:04,867 Man: THIS IS WASHINGTON, D.C. 2 00:00:04,867 --> 00:00:07,467 SOMEWHERE IN THIS CITY IS THE HEADQUARTERS 3 00:00:07,467 --> 00:00:10,567 OF A TOP SECRET ORGANIZATION KNOWN AS CONTROL. 4 00:00:10,567 --> 00:00:12,967 ITS BUSINESS IS COUNTERESPIONAGE. 5 00:00:15,068 --> 00:00:17,567 THIS IS SYMPHONY HALL IN WASHINGTON. 6 00:00:17,567 --> 00:00:19,600 SOMEWHERE IN THIS AUDIENCE IS 7 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:21,667 ONE OF CONTROL'S TOP EMPLOYEES, 8 00:00:21,667 --> 00:00:24,233 A MAN WHO LIVES A LIFE OF DANGER AND INTRIGUE, 9 00:00:24,233 --> 00:00:26,233 A MAN WHO'S BEEN CAREFULLY TRAINED 10 00:00:26,233 --> 00:00:29,701 NEVER TO DISCLOSE THE FACT THAT HE IS A SECRET AGENT. 11 00:00:29,701 --> 00:00:31,634 ( phone ringing ) 12 00:00:51,867 --> 00:00:54,068 ( phone continues ringing ) 13 00:01:11,367 --> 00:01:13,367 THIS IS SMART: 14 00:01:13,367 --> 00:01:15,367 MAXWELL SMART, AGENT 86. 15 00:01:16,567 --> 00:01:18,901 HELLO, CHIEF? MAX.WHAT'S UP? 16 00:01:19,967 --> 00:01:22,400 KAOS, EH? 17 00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:24,434 YES, SIR. I'LL BE RIGHT OVER. 18 00:01:28,867 --> 00:01:32,267 UH, I MAY BE A FEW MINUTES LATE, CHIEF. 19 00:02:06,867 --> 00:02:08,801 ( tires screeching ) 20 00:02:17,934 --> 00:02:20,500 ( theme music playing ) 21 00:03:10,500 --> 00:03:12,434 - HELLO, MAX. - HI, CHIEF. 22 00:03:16,667 --> 00:03:18,101 ( dings ) 23 00:03:19,534 --> 00:03:22,801 - GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN. - GOOD TO SEE YOU, CHIEF. 24 00:03:22,801 --> 00:03:25,867 WELL, CHIEF, WHAT'S ALL THE EXCITEMENT ABOUT? 25 00:03:25,867 --> 00:03:28,001 MAX, THIS IS A BIG ONE. 26 00:03:28,001 --> 00:03:31,068 THE FATE OF OUR ENTIRE NATION MAY DEPEND ON IT. 27 00:03:31,068 --> 00:03:33,300 AS YOU KNOW, HERE AT CONTROL 28 00:03:33,300 --> 00:03:36,400 IT'S POLICY TO ASSIGN CASES IN ROTATION. 29 00:03:38,101 --> 00:03:40,101 WELL, IT'S YOUR TURN AT BAT. 30 00:03:40,101 --> 00:03:41,434 RIGHT. 31 00:03:41,434 --> 00:03:43,967 OH, I'M SORRY. I'M TERRIBLY SORRY, SIR. 32 00:03:43,967 --> 00:03:46,134 IT'S JUST THAT I'M RARING TO GO. 33 00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:54,200 MAX, LET ME GIVE YOU A QUICK BRIEFING. 34 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:56,134 FIRST OF ALL, DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS? 35 00:03:58,834 --> 00:04:00,600 I BELIEVE IT'S A PHOTOGRAPH. 36 00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:04,400 IT'S A MACHINE CALLED THE INTHERMO, 37 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:06,400 AND IT'S CAPABLE OF CONVERTING HEAT WAVES 38 00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:08,300 INTO IMMENSE DESTRUCTIVE POWER. 39 00:04:08,300 --> 00:04:10,101 NOW, MAX, IT'S BEEN STOLEN 40 00:04:10,101 --> 00:04:12,500 AND ITS INVENTOR, PROFESSOR HUGO DANTE, 41 00:04:12,500 --> 00:04:14,600 KIDNAPPED FROM HIS LONG ISLAND LABORATORY. 42 00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:16,867 SOUNDS LIKE THE KAOS ORGANIZATION 43 00:04:16,867 --> 00:04:19,267 - IS BACK IN ACTION, CHIEF. - RIGHT. 44 00:04:19,267 --> 00:04:21,367 AND THEIR MR. BIG, WHOEVER HE IS, 45 00:04:21,367 --> 00:04:25,500 HAS BROADCAST A DEMAND FOR $100 MILLION RANSOM 46 00:04:25,500 --> 00:04:28,233 OR HE'LL USE THE INTHERMO AGAINST OUR CITIES. 47 00:04:28,233 --> 00:04:31,200 MR. BIG MUST BE STOPPED BEFORE HE GOES ANY FURTHER 48 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:33,534 - AND, MAX, IT SEEMS TO ME-- - JUST A MINUTE, CHIEF. 49 00:04:33,534 --> 00:04:36,500 - ISN'T THIS TOP SECURITY? - YES. 50 00:04:36,500 --> 00:04:39,068 WELL, SHOULDN'T WE ACTIVATE THE CONE OF SILENCE? 51 00:04:39,068 --> 00:04:40,734 THE CONE OF SILENCE? 52 00:04:40,734 --> 00:04:43,168 - YES. - ALL RIGHT, MAX. 53 00:04:43,168 --> 00:04:45,434 - HODGKINS. - Yes, sir. 54 00:04:45,434 --> 00:04:47,934 ACTIVATE THE CONE OF SILENCE. 55 00:04:47,934 --> 00:04:49,934 The cone of silence? 56 00:04:49,934 --> 00:04:51,867 ( whirring ) 57 00:04:55,500 --> 00:04:56,934 FIRST OF ALL, HOW MUCH-- 58 00:05:01,901 --> 00:05:04,068 HOW MUCH DO YOU KNOW ABOUT KAOS? 59 00:05:04,068 --> 00:05:06,200 WHAT DID YOU SAY, SIR? 60 00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:08,634 - KAOS. - WHAT? 61 00:05:08,634 --> 00:05:10,168 ( shouts ) KAOS. 62 00:05:10,168 --> 00:05:12,467 OH, KAOS. YES, OF COURSE. 63 00:05:12,467 --> 00:05:15,034 WELL THAT'S AN INTERNATIONAL CRIMINAL ORGANIZATION 64 00:05:15,034 --> 00:05:17,034 THAT WAS FOUNDED... 65 00:05:17,034 --> 00:05:19,134 OH, I THINK, IN 1957. 66 00:05:19,134 --> 00:05:20,934 HOW'S THAT? 67 00:05:20,934 --> 00:05:22,667 - '57. - WHAT? 68 00:05:22,667 --> 00:05:24,434 ( shouts) '57! 69 00:05:24,434 --> 00:05:26,634 AGENT 57 IS IN HONG KONG. 70 00:05:26,634 --> 00:05:28,567 - WHAT? - HONG KONG. 71 00:05:29,634 --> 00:05:31,634 WHAT ABOUT HONG KONG? 72 00:05:31,634 --> 00:05:33,134 WHAT? 73 00:05:33,134 --> 00:05:34,834 HONG KONG! 74 00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:37,667 WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT HONG KONG? 75 00:05:37,667 --> 00:05:39,634 - WHAT? - HONG-- 76 00:05:41,801 --> 00:05:44,233 HODGKINS, 77 00:05:44,233 --> 00:05:46,467 RAISE THE CONE OF SILENCE. 78 00:05:46,467 --> 00:05:50,300 - What? - RAISE THE CONE OF SILENCE! 79 00:05:50,300 --> 00:05:53,068 ( whirring ) 80 00:05:55,500 --> 00:05:58,467 PERHAPS WE COULD JUST TALK SOFTLY, SIR. 81 00:06:00,001 --> 00:06:02,600 MAX, LET'S GET YOU SET UP WITH SOME SPECIAL EQUIPMENT. 82 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:04,534 WOULD YOU PLEASE? 83 00:06:05,834 --> 00:06:07,834 WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'LL NEED? 84 00:06:07,834 --> 00:06:09,834 WELL, CHIEF, THIS LOOKS LIKE A HEAVY CASE, 85 00:06:09,834 --> 00:06:13,168 BUT I THINK I'LL JUST TAKE THE BARE NECESSITIES-- 86 00:06:13,168 --> 00:06:15,567 MY BINO-SPECS, 87 00:06:15,567 --> 00:06:18,068 MY LOCKER KEY 88 00:06:18,068 --> 00:06:20,068 AND MY BERETTA. 89 00:06:20,068 --> 00:06:22,068 MAX, TAKE THE INFLATO-COAT WITH YOU. 90 00:06:22,068 --> 00:06:23,834 OH, CHIEF, IT'S THE MIDDLE OF SUMMER. 91 00:06:23,834 --> 00:06:26,068 BESIDES, THAT'S NOT EVEN MY SIZE. 92 00:06:26,068 --> 00:06:28,333 HODGKINS WILL ISSUE ONE IN YOUR SIZE. 93 00:06:28,333 --> 00:06:30,333 I WANT YOU TO HAVE ONE WITH YOU. 94 00:06:30,333 --> 00:06:32,534 WELL, OKAY, CHIEF, IF YOU SAY SO. 95 00:06:32,534 --> 00:06:34,200 ANYTHING ELSE? 96 00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:37,001 WELL, I THINK I'D LIKE TO TAKE K-13 WITH ME ON THIS ONE. 97 00:06:37,001 --> 00:06:38,801 WE'VE WORKED TOGETHER BEFORE 98 00:06:38,801 --> 00:06:41,134 AND HE'S PROVED USEFUL. 99 00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:44,701 HODGKINS, SEND IN K-13. 100 00:06:44,701 --> 00:06:46,134 Yes, sir. 101 00:06:47,767 --> 00:06:50,233 DOWN, BOY. HOW ARE YOU? 102 00:06:50,233 --> 00:06:52,801 HOW ARE YOU, BOY? WELL, ARE YOU READY FOR ANOTHER ONE? 103 00:06:52,801 --> 00:06:54,934 THIS MAY BE A TOUGH ONE, FELLA. 104 00:06:54,934 --> 00:06:56,434 THINK WE CAN HANDLE IT? 105 00:06:56,434 --> 00:06:58,467 NOW REMEMBER, WE'RE DEALING WITH KAOS 106 00:06:58,467 --> 00:07:01,701 AND IF WE FALL INTO THEIR HANDS, THEY'LL SHOW US NO MERCY. 107 00:07:01,701 --> 00:07:03,934 YOU THINK WE CAN FACE EXCRUCIATING TORTURE? 108 00:07:03,934 --> 00:07:05,867 ( barks ) 109 00:07:07,267 --> 00:07:09,901 - AGENT 99 WILL MEET YOU AT THE AIRPORT. - GOOD. 110 00:07:09,901 --> 00:07:12,134 UH, HOW WILL I KNOW 99, CHIEF? 111 00:07:12,134 --> 00:07:15,001 99 WILL FIND YOU. USE THE FOLLOWING PHRASE: 112 00:07:15,001 --> 00:07:17,233 "NEW YORK METS WIN DOUBLE-HEADER." 113 00:07:17,233 --> 00:07:19,267 HEY, I LIKE THAT. 114 00:07:19,267 --> 00:07:21,567 NEW YORK METS WIN DOUBLE-HEADER. 115 00:07:21,567 --> 00:07:23,068 THAT'S VERY GOOD. 116 00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:24,934 86, YOUR MISSION IS SIMPLE-- 117 00:07:24,934 --> 00:07:26,467 FIND KAOS AND DESTROY IT, 118 00:07:26,467 --> 00:07:28,701 GET MR. BIG, RESCUE PROFESSOR DANTE 119 00:07:28,701 --> 00:07:30,701 AND BRING BACK THE INTHERMO. 120 00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:33,300 THIS MAY RUN INTO A LITTLE OVERTIME, CHIEF. 121 00:07:33,300 --> 00:07:35,600 MAX, YOU REALIZE YOU'LL BE FACING 122 00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:40,367 EVERY KIND OF DANGER IMAGINABLE. 123 00:07:40,367 --> 00:07:42,367 AND... 124 00:07:42,367 --> 00:07:44,134 LOVING IT. 125 00:07:44,134 --> 00:07:45,400 YES. 126 00:07:48,434 --> 00:07:51,834 ( dings ) 127 00:07:53,168 --> 00:07:55,168 MAX, WE'RE TRAINED 128 00:07:55,168 --> 00:07:57,367 NOT TO HAVE ANY PERSONAL FEELINGS, 129 00:07:57,367 --> 00:08:00,068 BUT I THINK YOU KNOW THAT IF I HAD ANY CHILDREN, 130 00:08:00,068 --> 00:08:02,834 I'D LIKE THEM TO BE LIKE YOU AND FANG. 131 00:08:04,934 --> 00:08:06,600 THANK YOU, CHIEF. 132 00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:08,467 GOOD HUNTING, MAX, 133 00:08:08,467 --> 00:08:10,068 AND REMEMBER THE CODE: 134 00:08:10,068 --> 00:08:12,101 "NEW YORK METS WIN DOUBLE-HEADER." 135 00:08:12,101 --> 00:08:13,901 THAT I'D LIKE TO SEE. 136 00:08:16,767 --> 00:08:19,434 Man over P.A.: Flight 92, Transcontinental Airlines, 137 00:08:19,434 --> 00:08:21,701 now departing gate 7. 138 00:08:21,701 --> 00:08:23,701 SIT, BOY, SIT. 139 00:08:23,701 --> 00:08:25,967 COME ON, SIT, SIT. 140 00:08:25,967 --> 00:08:27,667 GOOD BOY. 141 00:08:27,667 --> 00:08:29,168 STAY HERE. 142 00:08:30,467 --> 00:08:32,567 ( man continues announcing over P.A. ) 143 00:08:41,734 --> 00:08:44,500 Boy: "NEW YORK METS WIN DOUBLE-HEADER"! 144 00:08:44,500 --> 00:08:46,934 YOU WAIT HERE. MOTHER WILL GO CHECK ON OUR TICKETS. 145 00:08:46,934 --> 00:08:48,367 OKAY. 146 00:08:51,634 --> 00:08:53,634 NEW YORK METS WIN DOUBLE-HEADER. 147 00:08:53,634 --> 00:08:55,134 THAT'S RIGHT. 148 00:08:55,134 --> 00:08:56,801 ANY NEW DEVELOPMENTS FROM KAOS? 149 00:08:58,634 --> 00:09:00,801 WHAT ABOUT DANTE AND THE INTHERMO? 150 00:09:02,034 --> 00:09:03,367 ARE YOU 99? 151 00:09:03,367 --> 00:09:05,567 NO, I'M SIX AND A HALF. 152 00:09:23,567 --> 00:09:25,667 Woman: NEW YORK METS WIN DOUBLE-HEADER. 153 00:09:25,667 --> 00:09:27,134 I KNOW, I KNOW. 154 00:09:32,567 --> 00:09:34,767 BUT YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. 155 00:09:34,767 --> 00:09:37,634 THE SCORE WAS 99 TO 86. 156 00:09:41,300 --> 00:09:43,734 - ARE YOU 99? - UH-HUH. 157 00:09:43,734 --> 00:09:45,867 - 86? - YES. 158 00:09:45,867 --> 00:09:47,867 I THOUGHT YOU'D WANT TO GET RIGHT OUT 159 00:09:47,867 --> 00:09:50,734 - TO PROFESSOR DANTE'S LABORATORY AT CRAVEHAVEN. - GOOD. 160 00:09:50,734 --> 00:09:52,734 I SPOKE TO ZELINKA. THAT'S HIS ASSISTANT. 161 00:09:52,734 --> 00:09:54,867 - SHE'S EXPECTING US. - EXCELLENT. 162 00:09:54,867 --> 00:09:58,767 I HAVE A CAR OUTSIDE. FOLLOW ME. 163 00:09:59,967 --> 00:10:01,734 HOLD IT. 164 00:10:01,734 --> 00:10:04,034 I THINK I'M BEING FOLLOWED. 165 00:10:04,034 --> 00:10:05,534 THERE'S A MAN RIGHT BEHIND YOU. 166 00:10:05,534 --> 00:10:08,134 - UH-HUH.WHERE? - DON'T TURN AROUND, 167 00:10:08,134 --> 00:10:10,567 BUT YOU CAN SEE HIM THROUGH MY MIRRORED CUFFLINKS. 168 00:10:10,567 --> 00:10:12,667 UH-HUH. 169 00:10:12,667 --> 00:10:14,333 WHO'S HE? 170 00:10:14,333 --> 00:10:16,834 PROBABLY A RECEPTION COMMITTEE FROM KAOS. 171 00:10:16,834 --> 00:10:18,667 YOU WAIT HERE. 172 00:10:18,667 --> 00:10:21,134 - WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? - I'M GONNA USE MY LOCKER KEY. 173 00:10:30,333 --> 00:10:32,500 - 34? - YES, 86. 174 00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:34,434 MAN BEHIND ME-- 175 00:10:36,767 --> 00:10:40,634 GUN UNDER HIS RAINCOAT. PROBABLY KAOS AGENT. 176 00:10:40,634 --> 00:10:43,434 PUT PLAN Y-14 INTO EFFECT. 177 00:10:43,434 --> 00:10:45,667 99 AND I WILL ACT AS DECOYS. 178 00:10:45,667 --> 00:10:47,701 - ALL RIGHT? - ALL RIGHT. 179 00:10:54,734 --> 00:10:56,467 THE PLAN IS Y-14. 180 00:10:56,467 --> 00:10:58,068 - LET'S GO. - RIGHT. 181 00:11:30,134 --> 00:11:33,801 THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST EXPERIMENTAL LABORATORIES IN THE WORLD. 182 00:11:33,801 --> 00:11:36,567 WE HAVE ALL THE FINEST EQUIPMENT. 183 00:11:36,567 --> 00:11:39,333 OH, TRY IT AGAIN AT 700 CCMs. 184 00:11:39,333 --> 00:11:41,333 SAY, ISN'T THIS THE INTHERMO? 185 00:11:41,333 --> 00:11:43,467 OH NO, THAT'S ONLY A DUMMY MODEL 186 00:11:43,467 --> 00:11:45,168 OF THE STOLEN INTHERMO, 187 00:11:45,168 --> 00:11:47,168 BUT IT CAN BE USED TO DEMONSTRATE 188 00:11:47,168 --> 00:11:48,667 HOW THE BASIC PRINCIPLE 189 00:11:48,667 --> 00:11:50,667 OF THERMAL CONCENTRICITY HOLDS TRUE. 190 00:11:50,667 --> 00:11:53,400 ACTUALLY, THE DYNAMICS OF THE CATALYTIC PHENOMENA 191 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:56,734 IS EXPRESSED IN DIRECT RATIO TO ITS INITIAL MOLECULAR CONCLUSION. 192 00:11:56,734 --> 00:11:59,500 YES, WELL, PERHAPS WE'D BETTER GET ON TO SOMETHING ELSE. 193 00:11:59,500 --> 00:12:01,867 I'D LIKE TO KNOW EXACTLY WHERE YOU WERE 194 00:12:01,867 --> 00:12:04,934 WHEN THE PROFESSOR WAS ABDUCTED. 195 00:12:04,934 --> 00:12:07,967 IF YOU DON'T MIND, 99, I'D LIKE TO HANDLE THIS MYSELF. 196 00:12:07,967 --> 00:12:09,634 RIGHT. 197 00:12:09,634 --> 00:12:12,400 I'D LIKE TO KNOW EXACTLY WHERE YOU WERE 198 00:12:12,400 --> 00:12:14,400 WHEN THE PROFESSOR DANTE WAS ABDUCTED. 199 00:12:16,434 --> 00:12:19,667 YOU CAME OUTSIDE AND YOU SAW THEM STRUGGLING WITH PROFESSOR DANTE. 200 00:12:19,667 --> 00:12:21,767 EXACTLY WHERE DID THAT TAKE PLACE? 201 00:12:21,767 --> 00:12:24,068 THE CAR WAS OVER THERE BY THE BUSHES. 202 00:12:24,068 --> 00:12:25,934 LOOK, HE'S FOUND SOMETHING. 203 00:12:25,934 --> 00:12:27,934 COME HERE, FANG. COME HERE, BOY. 204 00:12:27,934 --> 00:12:30,001 WHAT HAVE YOU GOT, BOY? COME HERE. 205 00:12:30,001 --> 00:12:32,467 OH, IT'S ONLY AN OLD BANANA PEEL. 206 00:12:32,467 --> 00:12:34,701 WHY DON'T YOU GIVE IT TO ME? I'LL THROW IT AWAY. 207 00:12:34,701 --> 00:12:36,634 WAIT A MINUTE. 208 00:12:37,901 --> 00:12:40,867 THAT'S FUNNY. IT'S MADE OF RUBBER. 209 00:12:40,867 --> 00:12:43,068 HERE, LET ME SEE THAT. 210 00:12:43,068 --> 00:12:45,467 A RUBBER BANANA PEEL. 211 00:12:45,467 --> 00:12:47,134 HMM. 212 00:12:47,134 --> 00:12:49,534 A RUBBER BANANA. 213 00:12:49,534 --> 00:12:51,634 THAT'S STRANGE. 214 00:12:51,634 --> 00:12:53,634 WAIT A MINUTE. 215 00:12:53,634 --> 00:12:56,001 THERE'S SOMETHING WRITTEN ON THIS. 216 00:12:57,068 --> 00:12:59,701 "SOU STRET NOV." 217 00:12:59,701 --> 00:13:00,934 WHAT COULD THAT MEAN? 218 00:13:00,934 --> 00:13:03,834 "SOUTH... 219 00:13:03,834 --> 00:13:05,934 STREET... 220 00:13:05,934 --> 00:13:08,667 NOVELTY... 221 00:13:08,667 --> 00:13:10,667 INC." 222 00:13:10,667 --> 00:13:14,101 SOUTH STREET. THAT'S DOWN BY THE WATERFRONT. 223 00:13:14,101 --> 00:13:16,634 YOU KNOW SOMETHING? THEY COULD HAVE VERY EASILY 224 00:13:16,634 --> 00:13:19,200 HAVE DROPPED THIS WHEN THEY ABDUCTED THE PROFESSOR. 225 00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:20,901 99, YOU'D BETTER GET THE CAR. 226 00:13:20,901 --> 00:13:22,967 - I THINK WE SHOULD FOLLOW THIS UP. - RIGHT. 227 00:13:22,967 --> 00:13:24,967 HMM... 228 00:13:24,967 --> 00:13:28,567 YOU KNOW, THIS MAY BE OUR FIRST REAL LEAD. 229 00:13:28,567 --> 00:13:30,934 BUT WHY A RUBBER BANANA? 230 00:13:32,500 --> 00:13:34,434 THANK YOU, ZELINKA. 231 00:13:37,333 --> 00:13:39,500 BUT WHY A RUBBER BANANA PEEL? 232 00:13:40,701 --> 00:13:43,934 - ( Fang squeals ) - SORRY, FANG. 233 00:13:43,934 --> 00:13:46,500 86, QUICK. KAOS IS BROADCASTING AGAIN. 234 00:13:46,500 --> 00:13:48,734 Man: We will offer a practical demonstration 235 00:13:48,734 --> 00:13:50,634 of the Inthermo's enormous power. 236 00:13:50,634 --> 00:13:54,300 At 4:00 this afternoon in full view of downtown Manhattan 237 00:13:54,300 --> 00:13:57,600 we will destroy a great public figure. 238 00:13:57,600 --> 00:14:01,300 This is K.A.O.S., KAOS, singing off. 239 00:14:01,300 --> 00:14:03,934 A GREAT PUBLIC FIGURE AT 4:00 THIS AFTERNOON. 240 00:14:03,934 --> 00:14:05,600 - WHAT TIME IS IT NOW? - 2:20. 241 00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:08,367 2:20.THAT GIVES US EXACTLY ONE HOUR AND 40 MINUTES 242 00:14:08,367 --> 00:14:11,500 AND NOTHING TO GO ON BUT A RUBBER BANANA PEEL. 243 00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:13,967 STEP ON IT. HERE, BOY. 244 00:14:16,934 --> 00:14:18,867 ( tires screech ) 245 00:14:48,734 --> 00:14:51,267 IT'S ALL SET. SMART'S ON HIS WAY UP. 246 00:14:51,267 --> 00:14:53,300 MOVE INTO POSITION. 247 00:14:59,567 --> 00:15:04,134 ( foghorn whistles ) 248 00:15:18,168 --> 00:15:20,267 - YES? - I BELIEVE THIS IS 249 00:15:20,267 --> 00:15:21,967 ONE OF YOUR RUBBER BANANA PEELS. 250 00:15:21,967 --> 00:15:24,434 I'D LIKE TO KNOW WHEN IT WAS PURCHASED AND BY WHOM. 251 00:15:24,434 --> 00:15:26,300 I'D APPRECIATE IT IF YOU'D MAKE IT SNAPPY. 252 00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:28,233 WE'RE IN KIND OF A HURRY. 253 00:15:30,701 --> 00:15:35,001 ( foghorn whistles ) 254 00:15:35,001 --> 00:15:38,300 UH, THIS LOOKS LIKE IT. 255 00:15:39,734 --> 00:15:41,901 YOU'LL PROBABLY FIND WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR 256 00:15:41,901 --> 00:15:43,834 ON PAGE EIGHT. 257 00:15:47,400 --> 00:15:49,534 WELL, I DON'T SEE ANYTHING HERE. 258 00:15:49,534 --> 00:15:51,834 HERE. 259 00:15:51,834 --> 00:15:53,300 WHERE? 260 00:15:53,300 --> 00:15:54,667 HERE. 261 00:15:54,667 --> 00:15:58,934 ( high-pitched pulsating ) 262 00:15:58,934 --> 00:16:01,534 ( barks ) 263 00:16:03,001 --> 00:16:04,867 ( crackling ) 264 00:16:19,701 --> 00:16:22,400 - ARE YOU ALL RIGHT, 99? - UH-HUH.HOW ABOUT YOU? 265 00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:25,367 YES, FORTUNATELY, FANG KNOCKED ME OUT OF THE WAY JUST IN TIME. 266 00:16:25,367 --> 00:16:27,034 PHEW.THAT WAS A CLOSE ONE. 267 00:16:27,034 --> 00:16:30,001 YES, NOW WE'VE GOT EXACTLY... 268 00:16:30,001 --> 00:16:31,934 10-- 269 00:16:35,333 --> 00:16:36,767 WHY, YOU'RE A GIRL. 270 00:16:36,767 --> 00:16:38,267 YES. 271 00:16:39,967 --> 00:16:41,200 ( barks ) 272 00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:42,901 HE'S RIGHT. 273 00:16:42,901 --> 00:16:45,967 YES, I SUPPOSE SO. WE'VE GOT EXACTLY 10 MINUTES 274 00:16:45,967 --> 00:16:48,068 TO STOP THEM FROM USING THAT INTHERMO AGAIN. 275 00:16:48,068 --> 00:16:50,567 THE BEAM MUST HAVE COME FROM SOMEWHERE OUT IN THE HARBOR. 276 00:16:50,567 --> 00:16:52,134 BE CAREFUL. 277 00:16:52,134 --> 00:16:54,567 YES, WELL, I DON'T SEEM TO SEE ANYTHING DOWN THERE. 278 00:16:54,567 --> 00:16:57,300 THERE'S NOTHING OUT THERE EXCEPT THAT OLD GARBAGE SCOW. 279 00:16:57,300 --> 00:17:00,734 BUT THERE'S SOMETHING FUNNY ABOUT THAT OLD SCOW. 280 00:17:00,734 --> 00:17:03,233 ( snaps finger ) I'VE GOT IT!SEAGULLS! 281 00:17:03,233 --> 00:17:05,600 OH.BUT THERE ARE NO SEAGULLS. 282 00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:07,934 EXACTLY. DID YOU EVER SEE AN OLD GARBAGE SCOW 283 00:17:07,934 --> 00:17:09,667 WITHOUT SEAGULLS HOVERING OVER IT? 284 00:17:09,667 --> 00:17:11,767 I'D BETTER TAKE A CLOSER LOOK. 285 00:17:14,467 --> 00:17:16,500 ( foghorn whistling ) 286 00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:22,333 OF COURSE, THAT IT! 287 00:17:22,333 --> 00:17:24,333 RUBBER TRASH-- 288 00:17:24,333 --> 00:17:26,367 USING IT FOR CAMOUFLAGE. 289 00:17:26,367 --> 00:17:29,134 PROFESSOR DANTE AND THE INTHERMO ARE ON THAT BOAT, 290 00:17:29,134 --> 00:17:31,001 OR I'M NOT SMART. 291 00:17:31,001 --> 00:17:33,034 99-- OH-- 292 00:17:33,034 --> 00:17:35,300 WE'VE GOTTA GET DOWN THERE, GRAB ONE OF THOSE DINGHIES 293 00:17:35,300 --> 00:17:37,034 AND GET ONBOARD THAT BOAT BEFORE THEY USE 294 00:17:37,034 --> 00:17:39,200 - THAT DARN THING AGAIN. COME ON. - RIGHT. 295 00:17:42,101 --> 00:17:44,667 GOOD. THEY'RE BELOW DECK. KEEP LOW AND KEEP QUIET. 296 00:17:52,867 --> 00:17:54,600 TOSS THE GUN OVERBOARD. 297 00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:56,967 ( splashes ) 298 00:17:56,967 --> 00:17:59,300 THE OLD GARBAGE TRICK, EH? 299 00:17:59,300 --> 00:18:03,034 THAT'S THE SECOND TIME IT'S BEEN PULLED ON ME THIS YEAR. 300 00:18:03,034 --> 00:18:04,967 MR. BIG WANTS TO SEE YOU. 301 00:18:13,467 --> 00:18:15,567 SO YOU'RE MR. BIG. 302 00:18:15,567 --> 00:18:18,034 SO YOU'RE MAXWELL SMART. 303 00:18:18,034 --> 00:18:20,534 AT LAST WE MEET FACE-TO-FACE. 304 00:18:22,267 --> 00:18:24,801 PLEASE MAKE YOURSELVES COMFORTABLE. ( snaps fingers ) 305 00:18:29,267 --> 00:18:32,068 WHAT AN UNEXPECTED AND DELIGHTFUL PLEASURE 306 00:18:32,068 --> 00:18:35,600 TO HAVE THE ILLUSTRIOUS MAXWELL SMART AS MY GUEST. 307 00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:37,134 WILL YOU HAVE A DRINK? 308 00:18:37,134 --> 00:18:40,434 OH, UH, NO. 309 00:18:40,434 --> 00:18:42,667 NO.PERHAPS A CIGARETTE? 310 00:18:42,667 --> 00:18:44,600 ( foghorn bellowing ) 311 00:18:46,934 --> 00:18:50,367 THOSE ARE TRULY MAGNIFICENT BLENDS 312 00:18:50,367 --> 00:18:52,367 SPECIALLY IMPORTED FOR ME 313 00:18:52,367 --> 00:18:54,901 FROM HEIDELBERG. 314 00:18:54,901 --> 00:18:56,834 VERY GOOD. 315 00:18:58,168 --> 00:19:01,434 I SEE THAT WHAT YOUR ORGANIZATION LACKS IN STRATEGY 316 00:19:01,434 --> 00:19:03,567 MORE THAN MAKES UP IN LOVELINESS. 317 00:19:03,567 --> 00:19:06,001 - THANK YOU. - TAKE THEM BELOW 318 00:19:06,001 --> 00:19:08,101 AND MAKE THEM AS UNCOMFORTABLE AS POSSIBLE. 319 00:19:09,567 --> 00:19:11,467 NOW WAIT A MINUTE. 320 00:19:11,467 --> 00:19:13,600 I HAVE AN ALTERNATE PLAN. 321 00:19:13,600 --> 00:19:16,767 - ZELINKA! - OF COURSE. 322 00:19:16,767 --> 00:19:20,701 THAT EXPLAINS WHY IT WAS SO EASY FOR THEM TO KIDNAP THE PROFESSOR. 323 00:19:20,701 --> 00:19:22,701 IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU WISH TO SAY? 324 00:19:22,701 --> 00:19:25,534 YOU'RE VERY CLEVER, MY CHARMING LITTLE FRIEND. 325 00:19:25,534 --> 00:19:28,467 BUT NOT CLEVER ENOUGH. 326 00:19:28,467 --> 00:19:30,168 YOU SEE, THE MOMENT I SUSPECTED 327 00:19:30,168 --> 00:19:32,333 THERE WAS SOMETHING WRONG WITH THIS OLD SCOW, 328 00:19:32,333 --> 00:19:35,068 I IMMEDIATELY TELEPHONED HEADQUARTERS. 329 00:19:35,068 --> 00:19:37,500 AND I HAPPEN TO KNOW THAT AT THIS VERY MINUTE 330 00:19:37,500 --> 00:19:40,834 SEVEN COASTGUARD CUTTERS ARE CONVERGING ON THIS BOAT. 331 00:19:40,834 --> 00:19:43,001 WOULD YOU BELIEVE IT? SEVEN. 332 00:19:43,001 --> 00:19:45,400 I FIND THAT PRETTY HARD TO BELIEVE. 333 00:19:47,101 --> 00:19:49,168 WOULD YOU BELIEVE SIX? 334 00:19:49,168 --> 00:19:51,101 I DON'T THINK SO. 335 00:19:52,767 --> 00:19:55,701 HOW ABOUT TWO COPS IN A ROWBOAT? 336 00:19:55,701 --> 00:19:58,068 YOU'RE STALLING, MR. SMART. 337 00:19:59,867 --> 00:20:01,801 TAKE THEM BELOW. 338 00:20:02,967 --> 00:20:04,967 NO! 339 00:20:04,967 --> 00:20:07,333 ALL RIGHT, SMART, GET YOUR HANDS UP. 340 00:20:07,333 --> 00:20:09,267 UP! 341 00:20:16,233 --> 00:20:18,168 THAT'LL HOLD YOU. 342 00:20:20,534 --> 00:20:21,967 - ARE THEY GONE? - RIGHT. 343 00:20:23,701 --> 00:20:26,967 WELL, CHIEF WAS RIGHT ABOUT THE INFLATO-COAT. 344 00:20:26,967 --> 00:20:30,300 NOW, THEY'VE GOT PROFESSOR DANTE TIED UP IN THE OTHER ROOM. 345 00:20:30,300 --> 00:20:32,400 - SO HERE'S WHAT WE'LL DO-- - ( machine whirring ) 346 00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:34,134 WAIT A MINUTE. WHAT'S THAT? 347 00:20:34,134 --> 00:20:36,867 THEY MUST BE WARMING UP THE INTHERMO. 348 00:20:38,434 --> 00:20:40,934 - SO THAT'S THEIR TARGET! - WHAT? 349 00:20:40,934 --> 00:20:43,534 MISS LIBERTY HERSELF. 350 00:20:43,534 --> 00:20:46,200 OKAY, 99, HERE'S THE PLAN. 351 00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:48,267 I'LL UNTIE FANG AND RELEASE THE PROFESSOR. 352 00:20:48,267 --> 00:20:50,200 YOU KNOCK OVER THE GUARD AND TAKE HIS GUN. 353 00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:53,101 RIGHT. MAX! 354 00:20:53,101 --> 00:20:55,667 WELL, IT'S JUST THAT I'M SO GOOD AT KNOTS. 355 00:20:59,867 --> 00:21:01,901 EXCELLENT. WE'RE RIGHT ON TARGET. 356 00:21:28,134 --> 00:21:31,333 SMART'S ESCAPED! 357 00:21:37,367 --> 00:21:39,300 - ( clicks ) - IT'S JAMMED. 358 00:21:41,101 --> 00:21:44,767 OKAY, PROFESSOR, NOW LET'S DEACTIVATE THAT INTHERMO. 359 00:21:44,767 --> 00:21:46,934 GET SMART, YOU FOOLS! 360 00:22:28,767 --> 00:22:31,233 HELP! MAXWELL, HELP! 361 00:22:35,500 --> 00:22:37,434 MAX, LOOK OUT! 362 00:22:45,667 --> 00:22:47,767 DID YOU DEACTIVATE THE INTHERMO? 363 00:22:47,767 --> 00:22:51,034 WELL, I COULDN'T DO IT. YOU SEE, THE NUCLEAR POWER WAS FROZEN. 364 00:22:51,034 --> 00:22:53,434 I'VE GOT TO STOP THAT MADMAN. 365 00:22:53,434 --> 00:22:54,834 NO NO NO NO. 366 00:22:54,834 --> 00:22:56,834 WHEN I COULD NOT DEACTIVATE IT, 367 00:22:56,834 --> 00:22:59,233 I REVERSED IT TO SELF-DESTRUCTION, 368 00:22:59,233 --> 00:23:01,068 SO WHEN THE MAN WOULD PRESS THE BUTTON, 369 00:23:01,068 --> 00:23:03,834 THIS SHIP WOULD BECOME ONE BIG BLAZING INFERNO! 370 00:23:03,834 --> 00:23:05,967 AH!THAT'S WHAT I MEANT TO CALL IT-- 371 00:23:05,967 --> 00:23:08,134 DANTE'S INFERNO! 372 00:23:08,134 --> 00:23:09,934 - CAN YOU SWIM, PROFESSOR? - NO, 373 00:23:09,934 --> 00:23:13,667 BUT I AM FAMILIAR WITH ARCHIMEDES' PRINCIPLE OF DISPLACEMENT OF WATER 374 00:23:13,667 --> 00:23:15,168 IN WHICH-- 375 00:23:16,767 --> 00:23:18,701 COME ON, FANG! 376 00:23:35,300 --> 00:23:38,701 WELL, THAT'S THE END OF MR. BIG. 377 00:23:40,001 --> 00:23:42,634 IF ONLY HE COULD HAVE TURNED HIS EVIL GENIUS 378 00:23:42,634 --> 00:23:45,233 INTO... NICENESS. 379 00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:51,534 WELL, I'D BETTER LET THE CHIEF KNOW. 380 00:24:01,500 --> 00:24:03,267 SMART HERE, 381 00:24:03,267 --> 00:24:05,267 MAXWELL SMART. 382 00:24:05,267 --> 00:24:06,934 MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. 383 00:24:06,934 --> 00:24:11,001 PROFESSOR DANTE RESCUED, KAOS DESTROYED. 384 00:24:11,001 --> 00:24:13,068 AND I TAKE GREAT PRIDE IN SAYING 385 00:24:13,068 --> 00:24:16,233 THAT THE FORCES OF EVIL HAVE ONCE AGAIN BEEN FOILED 386 00:24:16,233 --> 00:24:19,068 IN THEIR ATTEMPT TO EXTINGUISH THE TORCH OF LIBERTY. 387 00:24:20,901 --> 00:24:23,500 WHAT? 388 00:24:23,500 --> 00:24:25,434 OH, SORRY. 389 00:24:26,767 --> 00:24:29,101 WRONG NUMBER. 390 00:24:34,901 --> 00:24:37,101 ( theme music playing )27850

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