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1
00:00:04,963 --> 00:00:09,962
We'll have to bung the advert in
again, Miss Cooling.
2
00:00:09,963 --> 00:00:15,556
I can't understand it, Mr Handy.
Not a single reply.
3
00:00:15,557 --> 00:00:18,726
We're supposed to open today.
4
00:00:18,727 --> 00:00:21,395
We'll just have to postpone.
5
00:00:21,396 --> 00:00:26,729
With an enterprise like this,
you need people with know-how...
6
00:00:26,730 --> 00:00:31,739
..who'll do anything for anybody -
that's the whole idea.
7
00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:36,327
Never mind, Mr Handy,
I'm sure you'll get stuffed.
8
00:00:36,328 --> 00:00:38,476
Eh? Oh, staffed.
9
00:00:53,075 --> 00:00:54,186
Morning. Eh?
10
00:00:54,188 --> 00:00:55,638
I'm saying good morning.
Morning.
11
00:00:55,639 --> 00:00:57,848
Nothing interesting?
12
00:00:57,850 --> 00:01:00,513
If there was, I'd be after it.
13
00:01:00,514 --> 00:01:03,271
Are you after a job, Mr Twist?
14
00:01:03,272 --> 00:01:08,562
Why not, Mr Infield-Hopping?
I'm not a fixture in this place.
15
00:01:08,563 --> 00:01:10,903
It wasn't built around me.
16
00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:15,533
A Ministry of Labour clerk
can get bored of his job.
17
00:01:15,534 --> 00:01:18,578
Watcha. What have you got today?
18
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:24,750
Nothing, Mr Weston. It's not worth
my friend's petrol to bring me here.
19
00:01:25,377 --> 00:01:31,340
A- ha! Bonjour. Guten tag.
Buongiorno. Shalom aleichem.
20
00:01:33,969 --> 00:01:39,390
Just demonstrating four of
the 16 languages I speak fluently.
21
00:01:39,391 --> 00:01:44,186
There must be a worthwhile
appointment for me today.
22
00:01:44,188 --> 00:01:47,231
Please say there is.
23
00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:48,608
Mr Courtenay...
Yes?
24
00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:51,277
..there isn't.
25
00:01:51,278 --> 00:01:52,314
Do you mind?
26
00:01:52,315 --> 00:01:54,071
Do you mind?
Oh, charming.
27
00:01:54,072 --> 00:01:56,172
You're in a nice mood.
28
00:01:56,173 --> 00:01:59,160
Sorry, but I'm fed up.
So am I.
29
00:01:59,161 --> 00:02:02,121
I need an interesting job.
Me, too.
30
00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:04,889
There are no exciting jobs for women
31
00:02:04,891 --> 00:02:07,585
You're right. It's a man's world.
32
00:02:07,586 --> 00:02:10,880
Someone should do
something about it.
33
00:02:10,881 --> 00:02:13,132
I agree. Come on.
34
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,801
No, we can't...
35
00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:17,720
You can't come in 'ere.
36
00:02:17,721 --> 00:02:21,349
Why not? I can do a man's job.
37
00:02:21,350 --> 00:02:22,803
Me, too.
What have you got?
38
00:02:22,804 --> 00:02:24,977
Nothing.
39
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:28,809
Hello, isn't it a lovely morning?
Anything on the cards?
40
00:02:28,810 --> 00:02:35,067
Nothing.
41
00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:42,364
I've never seen him move so fast.
42
00:02:42,365 --> 00:02:44,176
He was reading the paper.
43
00:02:44,177 --> 00:02:46,374
That can only mean...
44
00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:49,043
A job. A fascinating job.
45
00:02:49,044 --> 00:02:51,087
Just a moment...
46
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:57,344
Yeah, so fascinating
it's not been noted here.
47
00:03:16,822 --> 00:03:18,322
Sam Twist is the name.
48
00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:19,401
Francis Courtenay at your service.
49
00:03:19,403 --> 00:03:21,701
Mike Weston. That's me.
50
00:03:21,702 --> 00:03:23,635
Delia King, Miss.
51
00:03:23,636 --> 00:03:25,456
Dimple. Gaby Dimple.
52
00:03:25,458 --> 00:03:27,682
Lily Duveen, that's me.
53
00:03:27,683 --> 00:03:30,626
Montgomery Infield-Hopping.
54
00:03:30,627 --> 00:03:35,548
Seven - my lucky number.
You're all hired.
55
00:03:35,549 --> 00:03:38,349
Come in. Good morning.
56
00:03:38,350 --> 00:03:42,930
Who's responsibulb here?
Eh?
57
00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:44,444
You're Mr Haydn?
58
00:03:44,445 --> 00:03:46,809
How do you do?
Yes.
59
00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:52,607
I own this grady far and hadn't had
the chance to do the first meeting.
60
00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:53,649
Oh, yes.
61
00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:57,028
No, you don't understand my meal.
62
00:03:57,029 --> 00:03:58,946
Certainly, sir. What's the job?
63
00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:05,161
There's no job. You don't seem
to understand the twenty fido.
64
00:04:05,370 --> 00:04:10,541
Just give all the details
of the assignment to Miss Cooling.
65
00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:15,338
There's no assignment
shall she attain the ten see.
66
00:04:15,339 --> 00:04:19,628
I've come from this monthly grill
to meet you...
67
00:04:19,629 --> 00:04:21,969
..and I take it you're he.
68
00:04:21,970 --> 00:04:25,968
We do undertake anything, yes.
Tell Miss Cooling about it.
69
00:04:25,969 --> 00:04:29,018
This is most provoc encouragemold.
70
00:04:29,019 --> 00:04:34,982
I've come as the milk and the human
kindly and come to give it to you...
71
00:04:34,983 --> 00:04:38,194
..flollop me off on your secretrial.
72
00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:41,530
Charmish, but that's not the poil.
73
00:04:41,532 --> 00:04:44,153
I don't think that's too tough,
do you, Miss Cooling?
74
00:04:44,154 --> 00:04:48,120
No. No.
75
00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:50,289
You've got a note of it, then?
No.
76
00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:54,335
I should think not.
I didn't utter a worm.
77
00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:59,298
The age of courtesy and couragemold
is finish, I feel.
78
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:04,262
If you want me to conveil
my solicitole, I'll serve a writ.
79
00:05:04,263 --> 00:05:09,850
I can be as cold as the next.
And crystal cleal. Good morny.
80
00:05:11,937 --> 00:05:16,232
Oh, sorry. Was that a job?
What did he want?
81
00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:22,446
New set of teeth. This kind of
organisation gets swamped with nuts.
82
00:05:22,447 --> 00:05:24,198
And customers, I hope.
83
00:05:24,199 --> 00:05:30,455
But not, at the moment, for you.
Girls?
84
00:05:54,897 --> 00:05:57,893
Dead right. How would you like
to try on a lady's wardrobe?
85
00:05:57,894 --> 00:06:02,486
Would I?
Get cracking, then.
86
00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:08,534
I suppose she won on points.
87
00:06:08,535 --> 00:06:14,624
A lovely idea - an anniversary gift
for your wife. Feels so good.
88
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,879
Yes. Doesn't look bad, either.
89
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:25,134
A perfect fit. Thank you, Miss King.
90
00:06:25,135 --> 00:06:31,391
Can't wait to try on the others.
91
00:07:15,227 --> 00:07:18,813
Perfect! A perfect fit!
92
00:07:18,814 --> 00:07:20,940
Thank you very much.
93
00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:25,147
It's been a pleasure. What a
marvellous surprise for Mrs Belling.
94
00:07:25,148 --> 00:07:27,316
Would you like a coffee?
95
00:07:27,317 --> 00:07:28,651
Oh, thank you.
96
00:07:28,652 --> 00:07:34,908
Perfect!
97
00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:47,174
Are you dressed?
Does it look like it?
98
00:07:47,176 --> 00:07:50,094
My wife's getting out of a taxi.
99
00:07:50,095 --> 00:07:51,632
I thought she was away today.
100
00:07:51,633 --> 00:07:54,635
So did I.
She'll get her surprise early.
101
00:07:54,636 --> 00:07:56,804
She'll get one I didn't plan.
102
00:07:56,805 --> 00:07:58,824
What's that?
You.
103
00:07:58,825 --> 00:08:00,396
Oh, me!
104
00:08:00,397 --> 00:08:05,443
Quick, hide. Not in there!
You haven't got time to get out.
105
00:08:05,444 --> 00:08:07,690
I'm not dressed for the street.
106
00:08:07,691 --> 00:08:10,585
Precisely.
107
00:08:14,757 --> 00:08:16,663
Can we not explain?
108
00:08:17,873 --> 00:08:20,917
Helen. What are you doing here?
109
00:08:20,918 --> 00:08:27,006
I missed the train.
It's not worth going now.
110
00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:33,263
What's this? I know I'm absent-minded,
but I'd remember ordering all this.
111
00:08:35,974 --> 00:08:37,850
Did I?
112
00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:43,564
No, I did. I wanted you to see them
and wear some on our anniversary.
113
00:08:43,565 --> 00:08:49,195
Oh, darling!
It's the most staggering gift.
114
00:08:49,196 --> 00:08:51,108
Supppose they don't fit?
115
00:08:51,109 --> 00:08:52,485
I've seen to that.
116
00:08:52,486 --> 00:08:54,325
How?
117
00:08:54,326 --> 00:08:55,785
Does it matter?
118
00:08:55,786 --> 00:09:01,582
Poor darling husband, all nervy
because I've spoilt his surprise.
119
00:09:01,583 --> 00:09:05,289
Never mind. Stay here
and I'll make you a coffee.
120
00:09:05,290 --> 00:09:08,292
It is... HELEN! What are you doing?
121
00:09:08,293 --> 00:09:09,882
I'm putting my coat away.
122
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:11,879
You shouldn't have taken it off.
123
00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:16,055
Why not?
Because... the heating's given out.
124
00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:18,260
Darling, are you all right?
125
00:09:18,261 --> 00:09:20,059
Yes, perfectly.
126
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:22,681
You need something stronger.
127
00:09:22,682 --> 00:09:23,938
Give me that coat.
128
00:09:23,939 --> 00:09:26,644
That's no way to treat clothes.
129
00:09:26,645 --> 00:09:30,027
That old thing?
I bought it two months ago.
130
00:09:30,028 --> 00:09:33,406
It's not worth hanging up.
131
00:09:33,407 --> 00:09:39,663
Helen, please, don't open...
132
00:09:41,874 --> 00:09:48,087
I'll let you have the
estimate for the new clothes rail.
133
00:09:48,297 --> 00:09:53,092
Morning, ma'am.
134
00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:59,286
He came to try on your clothes,
but there's nothing between us...
135
00:09:59,391 --> 00:10:05,647
..because he's really
a very nice girl.
136
00:10:13,155 --> 00:10:14,655
Sam, relax.
137
00:10:14,656 --> 00:10:17,909
I'll relax when I get an assignment.
138
00:10:17,910 --> 00:10:19,363
Everyone else is out and about.
139
00:10:19,364 --> 00:10:21,537
They're on routine jobs.
140
00:10:21,538 --> 00:10:24,452
I bet fate has got
something exciting in store for you.
141
00:10:24,453 --> 00:10:29,295
It'll be the first time.
142
00:10:29,296 --> 00:10:32,548
Helping Hands? Yes, with pleasure.
143
00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:35,509
Immediately? Yes.
144
00:10:35,511 --> 00:10:38,888
Right, got it. Thank you.
145
00:10:38,889 --> 00:10:40,447
What did I tell you?
146
00:10:40,448 --> 00:10:41,969
No? Something exciting?
147
00:10:41,970 --> 00:10:48,226
Baby-sitting.
148
00:11:01,828 --> 00:11:06,076
Good evening.
I'm from Helping... Hands.
149
00:11:06,078 --> 00:11:12,334
Hello. Come in, do.
150
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:18,047
Is this the right place? I mean...
151
00:11:18,048 --> 00:11:21,681
Yes, this is the right place.
152
00:11:21,682 --> 00:11:24,433
Erm... P-P-Panting?
153
00:11:24,434 --> 00:11:27,645
No, that's the way I always breathe.
154
00:11:27,646 --> 00:11:30,731
And your name?
155
00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:33,776
Twist, madam. Sam Twist.
156
00:11:33,777 --> 00:11:40,033
Do sit down.
157
00:11:44,079 --> 00:11:47,206
Yes, well, er... where's the baby?
158
00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:53,296
Oh, look.
159
00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:56,048
Oh, delightful.
160
00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:58,217
And so like you, too.
161
00:11:58,218 --> 00:12:01,929
Well, I don't wish to delay you...
162
00:12:01,930 --> 00:12:05,308
..so just show me where the baby is.
163
00:12:05,309 --> 00:12:09,312
Oh, come here and relax, Mr Twist.
164
00:12:09,313 --> 00:12:14,984
Relax? No, thank you, madam,
not while I'm on duty.
165
00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:17,773
Well, madam, where is the baby?
166
00:12:17,774 --> 00:12:20,990
I haven't got a baby.
167
00:12:20,991 --> 00:12:22,736
That's my niece.
168
00:12:22,738 --> 00:12:24,619
Oh.
169
00:12:24,620 --> 00:12:30,750
Sit down.
170
00:12:31,376 --> 00:12:32,668
Er, no, no.
171
00:12:32,669 --> 00:12:36,964
Mr Twist,
don't make it difficult for me.
172
00:12:36,965 --> 00:12:39,545
You're making it difficult for me,
madam.
173
00:12:39,546 --> 00:12:42,094
I'll explain, Mr Twist.
174
00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:47,099
You see, I have deceived you.
175
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:51,395
I don't really need a baby-sitter.
176
00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:53,267
In that case, I'll just be going...
177
00:12:53,268 --> 00:12:55,352
But I do need a man.
178
00:12:55,353 --> 00:12:56,776
Mrs Panting!
179
00:12:56,777 --> 00:12:59,445
You will help me, won't you?
180
00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:01,066
It depends what you want.
181
00:13:01,068 --> 00:13:02,740
You.
182
00:13:02,741 --> 00:13:05,451
Why me? Ahem. Why me?
183
00:13:05,452 --> 00:13:10,451
It could be any man, but I want
to keep it on a professional basis.
184
00:13:10,452 --> 00:13:13,263
I must have a man by eight o'clock.
185
00:13:13,264 --> 00:13:17,421
Well, we only supply helping hands.
186
00:13:17,422 --> 00:13:20,211
Why eight o'clock?
That's when he gets home.
187
00:13:20,212 --> 00:13:22,426
Oh, I see, yes, does he?
188
00:13:22,427 --> 00:13:23,511
Who?
189
00:13:23,512 --> 00:13:26,806
Mr Panting.
190
00:13:26,807 --> 00:13:29,642
My husband!
191
00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:33,062
Oh, madam.
192
00:13:33,063 --> 00:13:34,480
He neglects me.
193
00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:37,650
I find that difficult to believe.
194
00:13:37,651 --> 00:13:39,313
He ignores me.
195
00:13:39,314 --> 00:13:40,903
It's impossible.
196
00:13:40,904 --> 00:13:43,109
He takes me for granted.
197
00:13:43,110 --> 00:13:45,449
Surely not.
198
00:13:45,450 --> 00:13:51,414
I know he loves me,
but I want him to show it more.
199
00:13:51,415 --> 00:13:55,246
Ask him to...
Have a little chat with him.
200
00:13:55,247 --> 00:13:57,432
It's no good, I've tried.
201
00:13:57,433 --> 00:13:59,755
No, he needs a lesson.
202
00:13:59,756 --> 00:14:02,717
So do I. I mean, that he does, yes.
203
00:14:02,718 --> 00:14:04,213
I've got to make him jealous.
204
00:14:04,214 --> 00:14:07,138
That's the ticket.
He must find me with a man.
205
00:14:07,139 --> 00:14:08,968
You're so right. At eight o'clock.
206
00:14:08,969 --> 00:14:11,183
On the dot.
Now do you understand?
207
00:14:11,185 --> 00:14:15,730
Yes, Mrs Panting, I... NO! No, no.
208
00:14:15,731 --> 00:14:17,518
Please, it's nearly eight o'clock.
209
00:14:17,519 --> 00:14:19,270
Stay away from me, dangerous lady.
210
00:14:19,271 --> 00:14:21,611
He'll be here in seconds.
211
00:14:21,612 --> 00:14:25,531
You might as well make it look good.
Kiss me.
212
00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:27,055
Madam!
213
00:14:33,312 --> 00:14:34,666
Kiss me, kiss me, kiss me...
214
00:14:36,335 --> 00:14:39,795
Penny!
215
00:14:39,796 --> 00:14:42,340
Let me go, you beast!
216
00:14:42,341 --> 00:14:45,885
Can I help it if I'm irresistible?
217
00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:51,933
Mr Panting, I can explain.
I'm from Helping Hands. Let me go.
218
00:14:52,976 --> 00:14:56,729
My braces. I can explain everything.
219
00:14:56,730 --> 00:15:02,777
Your wife... oh, my braces.
It all started with the baby...
220
00:15:03,820 --> 00:15:07,198
Darling.
221
00:15:07,199 --> 00:15:13,455
Did you hurt your hand?
222
00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:23,042
"Attractive man required
to model for our..."
223
00:15:23,799 --> 00:15:29,095
Morning. Oh, sorry.
It blew off. Oh.
224
00:15:31,181 --> 00:15:37,437
Ahem!
225
00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:47,573
Aye aye.
226
00:15:50,284 --> 00:15:52,571
Yes, madam, right away.
227
00:15:52,572 --> 00:15:55,413
Yes, certainly, thank you.
228
00:15:55,414 --> 00:15:56,596
Job for you.
229
00:15:56,597 --> 00:15:57,707
As a model?
230
00:15:57,708 --> 00:16:00,037
Lady wants someone to walk her pet.
231
00:16:00,038 --> 00:16:02,331
It's a lovely day. Do you good.
232
00:16:02,332 --> 00:16:06,215
Nice address, anyway.
233
00:16:06,216 --> 00:16:10,840
I'm from Helping Hands. I understand
you want me to take your pet out.
234
00:16:10,841 --> 00:16:15,057
Oh, yes. I got such an awful cold.
235
00:16:15,058 --> 00:16:18,222
Well, never mind.
Where is the little chap?
236
00:16:18,223 --> 00:16:21,314
Here.
237
00:16:21,315 --> 00:16:25,234
Oh, I, really, I... I rather er...
238
00:16:25,235 --> 00:16:27,398
Helping Hands
said they can do anything.
239
00:16:27,399 --> 00:16:30,573
And so we will. What's his name?
240
00:16:30,574 --> 00:16:31,652
Yoki.
241
00:16:31,653 --> 00:16:32,658
Yoki.
242
00:16:32,659 --> 00:16:34,447
Don't let him out of your sight.
243
00:16:34,448 --> 00:16:40,704
No. Come on, Yoki.
244
00:16:44,588 --> 00:16:47,215
Which way? This way? That way?
245
00:16:47,216 --> 00:16:51,636
Oh, down here, all right. Come along.
246
00:16:51,637 --> 00:16:55,556
Go for a nice walk, shall we?
Walk nicely.
247
00:16:55,557 --> 00:16:58,643
You're not bringing that on here.
248
00:16:58,644 --> 00:17:04,273
But he's tired and the best way to
see London is from the top of a bus.
249
00:17:04,274 --> 00:17:07,235
Not this one. Great hairy thing.
250
00:17:07,236 --> 00:17:08,898
I am not!
251
00:17:08,899 --> 00:17:10,488
Hold tight.
252
00:17:10,489 --> 00:17:15,284
I'll report you to the RSPCA.
Cheeky monkey!
253
00:17:15,285 --> 00:17:20,915
No offence. The British Transport
Commission should hear about this.
254
00:17:23,001 --> 00:17:28,422
Taxi! Taxi!
255
00:17:28,423 --> 00:17:29,715
Can you take us to...
256
00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:32,359
I'll take you, but not your brother.
257
00:17:32,360 --> 00:17:35,179
We've had a long walk. We're tired.
258
00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:38,052
Why not climb in a tree for a kip?
259
00:17:38,053 --> 00:17:40,551
Thank you very much Charming.
260
00:17:40,552 --> 00:17:43,771
Did you hear what he said?
261
00:17:43,772 --> 00:17:46,649
Do you want to go somewhere?
262
00:17:46,650 --> 00:17:52,154
Oh, I see. You want to see
your friends. And so you shall.
263
00:17:52,155 --> 00:17:58,412
Just in time for tea.
264
00:18:32,446 --> 00:18:33,821
Morning, Lil.
265
00:18:33,822 --> 00:18:35,943
Morning.
Is it worth taking my coat off?
266
00:18:35,944 --> 00:18:38,159
I've got a beaut for you.
267
00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:40,573
Collecting invitation cards
and being pleasant.
268
00:18:40,574 --> 00:18:46,830
I say, that'll be nice.
269
00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:03,226
Thank you.
270
00:19:03,227 --> 00:19:06,145
Thank you.
271
00:19:06,146 --> 00:19:07,245
Good morning.
272
00:19:07,246 --> 00:19:08,837
Good morning.
273
00:19:08,838 --> 00:19:10,358
That's everybody.
274
00:19:10,359 --> 00:19:12,271
A nice crowd they are, too.
275
00:19:12,272 --> 00:19:16,113
Yes, very.
Can I render any further service?
276
00:19:16,114 --> 00:19:20,696
Just collecting these cards
isn't sweated labour.
277
00:19:20,697 --> 00:19:22,382
Please be our guest.
278
00:19:22,383 --> 00:19:26,457
Oh, I say. Thanks.
279
00:19:26,458 --> 00:19:28,329
Are you a lover of the grape,
Miss Duveen?
280
00:19:28,330 --> 00:19:30,419
Actually, no.
281
00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:36,342
I never know what to do with
the pips - flick, collect or spit.
282
00:19:36,343 --> 00:19:40,346
Well, I never...
Will you excuse me?
283
00:19:40,347 --> 00:19:42,030
Madam, for you? A soupcon?
284
00:19:42,031 --> 00:19:44,394
Really? What kind of soup?
285
00:19:44,395 --> 00:19:46,978
Soup? Madam, there is no soup.
286
00:19:46,979 --> 00:19:48,187
You just said there was.
287
00:19:48,188 --> 00:19:52,316
I asked if you'd care to taste
the 1952.
288
00:19:52,317 --> 00:19:57,947
Rather! Such a pretty colour.
Like Coca-Cola. Thanks, I'll try it.
289
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:03,578
Madam, please. Don't unsettle it.
290
00:20:03,579 --> 00:20:06,283
Wow! That's what I call a drink.
291
00:20:06,284 --> 00:20:09,333
I'll have some more. Fill it up.
292
00:20:09,334 --> 00:20:10,821
Fill? To the brim.
293
00:20:10,822 --> 00:20:13,546
Let's have a proper drink.
294
00:20:13,547 --> 00:20:16,877
Madam, you're supposed to taste
several wines.
295
00:20:16,878 --> 00:20:22,972
Don't worry, I will. Fill it up.
296
00:20:25,058 --> 00:20:29,312
Not exactly heavy-handed, are you?
297
00:20:29,313 --> 00:20:35,569
Oh, well, here's cream
on your salad!
298
00:20:37,946 --> 00:20:44,160
Tickle.
299
00:20:44,369 --> 00:20:50,626
Nice.
300
00:20:58,008 --> 00:21:04,264
By George!
301
00:21:19,238 --> 00:21:20,404
Hello.
302
00:21:20,405 --> 00:21:21,572
Powerful stuff.
303
00:21:21,573 --> 00:21:24,575
I see you had the Nuit-St-Georges.
304
00:21:24,576 --> 00:21:26,238
A dignified wine, don't you think?
305
00:21:26,239 --> 00:21:28,829
Oh, very.
306
00:21:28,830 --> 00:21:33,709
It was a fascinating experience.
Have you ever...
307
00:21:33,710 --> 00:21:36,081
What are you doing down there?
308
00:21:36,083 --> 00:21:38,506
Getting up. But I can't.
309
00:21:38,507 --> 00:21:41,133
Come along, young lady. Hup!
310
00:21:41,134 --> 00:21:43,506
No handling, if you please.
311
00:21:43,507 --> 00:21:49,225
But I was only...
I know your sort. That'll do.
312
00:21:51,311 --> 00:21:53,563
Bless my soul!
313
00:21:53,564 --> 00:21:59,235
It certainly was powerful stuff.
314
00:22:01,321 --> 00:22:03,447
Marvellous!
315
00:22:03,448 --> 00:22:06,242
Did you see that? Do do it again.
316
00:22:06,243 --> 00:22:12,498
Madam!
317
00:22:12,499 --> 00:22:18,421
Oh, dear. Just shows you. First time
must have been beginner's luck.
318
00:22:18,422 --> 00:22:19,792
I really...
319
00:22:19,793 --> 00:22:21,090
I'm so sleepy.
320
00:22:21,091 --> 00:22:22,383
You can't sleep here, madam.
321
00:22:22,384 --> 00:22:25,026
What's going on? I'm dropping off.
322
00:22:25,027 --> 00:22:27,763
Miss Duveen! If my wife were to...
323
00:22:27,764 --> 00:22:31,303
A married man,
making advances to me?
324
00:22:31,304 --> 00:22:32,685
I didn't!
Chuck him out!
325
00:22:32,686 --> 00:22:37,189
Miss Duveen, please.
I keep being insulted at this do.
326
00:22:37,191 --> 00:22:39,103
Miss Duveen, this is not a do.
327
00:22:39,104 --> 00:22:41,068
Don't speak to me like that!
328
00:22:41,069 --> 00:22:42,236
I'm most terribly sorry.
329
00:22:42,237 --> 00:22:45,422
All right, all right, I'm going.
330
00:22:45,423 --> 00:22:49,994
I wouldn't stay here if you paid me.
331
00:22:49,995 --> 00:22:53,331
I can't apologise enough.
332
00:22:53,332 --> 00:22:55,791
Come on, gorgeous.
333
00:22:55,792 --> 00:22:59,170
Hey! Hold up there.
334
00:22:59,171 --> 00:23:04,842
Let's get out of here together, hm?
335
00:23:06,929 --> 00:23:13,185
Disgraceful. A load of drunks.
336
00:23:17,314 --> 00:23:19,482
We've got them all working.
337
00:23:19,483 --> 00:23:25,675
On the day we got our first office
flowers. The sign of success.
338
00:23:25,781 --> 00:23:27,026
Isn't it wonderful?
339
00:23:27,027 --> 00:23:32,662
Cigar?
No, I don't smoke, thank you.
340
00:23:32,663 --> 00:23:34,997
Come in.
341
00:23:34,998 --> 00:23:36,332
You again.
342
00:23:36,333 --> 00:23:39,288
There's no rights than me to beheed.
343
00:23:39,289 --> 00:23:40,294
Miss Cooling.
344
00:23:40,295 --> 00:23:45,925
Oh, not agrail! It's you I'm going
to thalkest to, come what mayload.
345
00:23:48,011 --> 00:23:52,056
Just tell my secretary.
Miss Coollie?
346
00:23:52,057 --> 00:23:55,142
Oh, perhaps I willed.
347
00:23:55,143 --> 00:24:01,357
Perhaps this lade shall understand
the simply measure I'm to offering.
348
00:24:01,567 --> 00:24:03,270
Have I your attentiahoad, madler?
349
00:24:03,271 --> 00:24:05,570
Lovely day, yes.
350
00:24:05,571 --> 00:24:07,399
I'm not here
to discussit the weatheraped.
351
00:24:07,401 --> 00:24:09,991
We should listen together.
352
00:24:09,992 --> 00:24:12,076
You deal with it, Miss Cooling.
353
00:24:12,077 --> 00:24:17,915
There's no understab in your
eardroves! Beyond my comprehoad.
354
00:24:17,916 --> 00:24:22,373
You don't understand
a syllabulb I'm uttering.
355
00:24:22,374 --> 00:24:24,038
You're from sanitation?
356
00:24:24,039 --> 00:24:25,631
I didn't catch that.
357
00:24:25,632 --> 00:24:26,752
He mentioned the guttering.
358
00:24:26,753 --> 00:24:29,051
I did knockers!
359
00:24:29,052 --> 00:24:30,970
There's nothing wrong
with the guttering.
360
00:24:30,971 --> 00:24:35,808
It said which knockers
intern or extern rebode.
361
00:24:35,809 --> 00:24:37,513
It's your responsible
to sign it flap.
362
00:24:37,514 --> 00:24:40,479
You understand, Miss Cooling.
363
00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:41,647
No.
364
00:24:41,648 --> 00:24:46,819
What do you mean, nockers?
You think I talk doplo dutchery?
365
00:24:46,820 --> 00:24:48,237
Dutch!
366
00:24:48,238 --> 00:24:49,739
He's Dutch!
367
00:24:49,740 --> 00:24:51,464
We have a man...
368
00:24:51,465 --> 00:24:53,117
A lere leeny...
369
00:24:53,118 --> 00:24:58,748
Don't get excited. This man
very clever. He speak 16 language.
370
00:24:58,749 --> 00:25:00,202
You come back...
371
00:25:00,203 --> 00:25:02,752
I am not Dutch!
372
00:25:02,753 --> 00:25:04,629
Look, I'm a very busy man.
373
00:25:04,630 --> 00:25:06,417
Do you think I stand for a loafery?
374
00:25:06,418 --> 00:25:08,925
He wants a chauffeur!
375
00:25:08,926 --> 00:25:11,630
We don't compete with car-hire firms.
376
00:25:11,631 --> 00:25:13,763
I'm gome, but I recoil.
377
00:25:13,764 --> 00:25:18,425
To blaze with all communicail,
save the voice and languie
378
00:25:18,426 --> 00:25:20,353
my voice and languie.
379
00:25:20,354 --> 00:25:26,103
This is mobe obsession - to convey
the message. I will for doom that.
380
00:25:26,104 --> 00:25:30,733
I don't want your grames,
but I'll play to the bitter hobis.
381
00:25:30,734 --> 00:25:31,781
How dare you!
382
00:25:31,782 --> 00:25:36,869
And when I recoil alert and refresh,
you shall understab!
383
00:25:36,870 --> 00:25:39,038
And you!
384
00:25:39,039 --> 00:25:41,118
Handy? Who's Handy?
385
00:25:41,119 --> 00:25:43,209
I am.
You look it, I must say.
386
00:25:43,210 --> 00:25:45,393
Thank you. Won't you sit down?
387
00:25:45,394 --> 00:25:48,673
No. I'm Amalagamated Scrap Iron.
388
00:25:48,674 --> 00:25:49,960
You must be a millionaire.
389
00:25:49,961 --> 00:25:51,063
Four times over.
390
00:25:51,064 --> 00:25:52,093
Do sit down.
391
00:25:52,094 --> 00:25:54,595
I've already said no!
392
00:25:54,596 --> 00:25:56,947
Do you provide substitutes?
393
00:25:56,948 --> 00:25:59,934
No! This is a respectable firm.
394
00:25:59,935 --> 00:26:02,515
You know the hospital up the road?
395
00:26:02,516 --> 00:26:06,060
Oh, yes.
Keep my place for me today.
396
00:26:06,061 --> 00:26:07,942
Eh?
Didn't I make myself clear?!
397
00:26:07,943 --> 00:26:11,857
I just don't understand.
You're a millionaire.
398
00:26:11,858 --> 00:26:12,905
Four times over.
399
00:26:12,906 --> 00:26:14,902
And you go to an NHS hospital.
400
00:26:14,903 --> 00:26:16,993
It's the principle.
401
00:26:16,994 --> 00:26:23,249
I buy my stamp and have my money's
worth. But I've no time to wait.
402
00:26:23,458 --> 00:26:27,879
Got to take over
International Screws today.
403
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:29,922
Will you do it? Yes or no?
404
00:26:29,923 --> 00:26:33,050
I'll put my best operative onto it.
405
00:26:33,051 --> 00:26:38,723
You won't! I want you.
The head man, or the deal's off.
406
00:26:38,724 --> 00:26:40,725
Very well. Have a cigar.
407
00:26:40,726 --> 00:26:46,397
Don't smoke 'em. Neither should you.
Bad for you.
408
00:26:46,398 --> 00:26:49,400
What a stench.
409
00:26:49,401 --> 00:26:55,657
Have a flower to get rid of it.
410
00:26:57,951 --> 00:27:00,661
Good morning, Doctor, Sister.
411
00:27:00,662 --> 00:27:05,035
When Sir Theodore arrives,
telephone me at once.
412
00:27:05,036 --> 00:27:06,751
Yes, Matron.
413
00:27:06,752 --> 00:27:11,417
This is a vital inspection.
What he says goes. Clear?
414
00:27:11,418 --> 00:27:14,842
Yes, but how do I recognise him?
415
00:27:14,843 --> 00:27:20,681
He's not exactly handsome, but
I'm told he has a rugged grandeur...
416
00:27:20,682 --> 00:27:24,894
..and he wears a flower
in his buttonhole.
417
00:27:24,895 --> 00:27:30,858
Yes, Matron.
418
00:27:31,902 --> 00:27:35,196
Doctor?
419
00:27:35,197 --> 00:27:37,782
Doctor, he's here.
420
00:27:37,783 --> 00:27:38,783
No!
421
00:27:38,784 --> 00:27:43,579
I'll phone Matron.
422
00:27:43,580 --> 00:27:45,623
Hello, sir. Hello.
423
00:27:45,624 --> 00:27:47,411
This is an unexpected honour.
424
00:27:47,412 --> 00:27:48,876
Is it?
425
00:27:48,877 --> 00:27:51,462
Of course. That's nice of you.
426
00:27:51,463 --> 00:27:54,835
Would you like to wait
in the examination room?
427
00:27:54,836 --> 00:27:57,468
Yes, I don't mind. Thank you.
428
00:27:57,469 --> 00:28:02,181
Nice people.
429
00:28:02,182 --> 00:28:03,516
Good morning.
Hello.
430
00:28:03,517 --> 00:28:05,721
First patient, Sister.
431
00:28:05,722 --> 00:28:09,063
Yes, Doctor.
432
00:28:09,064 --> 00:28:13,693
Good morning. Welcome.
We feel most honoured.
433
00:28:13,694 --> 00:28:14,986
How do you do?
434
00:28:14,987 --> 00:28:18,859
Would you please follow me,
Sir Theodore?
435
00:28:18,860 --> 00:28:23,619
Sir Theodore?
436
00:28:25,706 --> 00:28:27,368
Morning, matron. Morning, sir.
437
00:28:27,369 --> 00:28:31,540
Morning, sister.
438
00:28:35,841 --> 00:28:41,345
Watch closely. This is the world's
most inspired diagnostician.
439
00:28:43,432 --> 00:28:48,556
He must be to learn about a varicose
vein by studying the scalp.
440
00:28:48,557 --> 00:28:52,148
Watch, listen, learn.
441
00:28:52,149 --> 00:28:53,691
Never.
442
00:28:53,692 --> 00:28:54,942
What do you mean, never?
443
00:28:54,943 --> 00:28:57,377
That track, in the mud - never.
444
00:28:57,378 --> 00:29:00,095
I've been following that horse.
445
00:29:00,096 --> 00:29:04,368
But other horses never follow him.
446
00:29:04,369 --> 00:29:08,956
Don't put me off.
I'm doing you a favour. That's a cow.
447
00:29:08,957 --> 00:29:12,084
Mind your own business.
OK.
448
00:29:12,085 --> 00:29:17,381
It's his funeral.
449
00:29:17,382 --> 00:29:22,178
Nurse, side ward.
450
00:29:22,179 --> 00:29:23,304
Oh, I'm sorry.
Nurse!
451
00:29:23,305 --> 00:29:25,431
I'm sorry, sister.
452
00:29:25,432 --> 00:29:29,518
That's too heavy a load for you.
Don't stand there, give her a hand!
453
00:29:33,690 --> 00:29:38,527
Let me help you, nurse.
454
00:29:38,529 --> 00:29:39,820
Hey, what the hell...!
455
00:29:39,821 --> 00:29:43,157
Cheer up, chicken. It's all right.
456
00:29:43,158 --> 00:29:48,829
Where would we be if we didn't help
each other? Let's see some more.
457
00:29:50,916 --> 00:29:54,919
All great men
are slightly eccentric.
458
00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:56,686
Yes, Matron.
459
00:29:56,687 --> 00:30:00,508
Yes, Matron.
460
00:30:00,509 --> 00:30:04,011
All right, Nurse.
461
00:30:08,183 --> 00:30:11,727
Goochy-goochy! Wibble-wibble!
462
00:30:11,728 --> 00:30:14,272
Little baskets!
463
00:30:14,273 --> 00:30:17,019
I mean, what little baskets
you keep them in.
464
00:30:17,020 --> 00:30:19,485
Oh, yes.
465
00:30:19,486 --> 00:30:20,528
I love kids.
466
00:30:20,529 --> 00:30:22,947
Have you any of your own?
467
00:30:22,948 --> 00:30:26,576
I can't say I have,
I can't say I haven't.
468
00:30:26,577 --> 00:30:30,658
I always say that brilliant men
are absent-minded.
469
00:30:30,659 --> 00:30:31,701
Yeah.
470
00:30:41,967 --> 00:30:47,972
We give our nurses
a regular checkup.
471
00:30:47,973 --> 00:30:51,220
Is there anything else
we can show you?
472
00:30:51,221 --> 00:30:53,306
I think I'll rest here awhile.
473
00:30:59,902 --> 00:31:01,665
You're late.
Where is he?
474
00:31:01,666 --> 00:31:04,692
Where's who?
The man keeping my place.
475
00:31:04,693 --> 00:31:05,698
What man?
476
00:31:05,699 --> 00:31:09,201
He had a face like a relief map.
477
00:31:09,203 --> 00:31:11,370
And a flower?
478
00:31:11,371 --> 00:31:14,499
Yes, he had a flower. He's from
Helping Hands. Where is he?
479
00:31:21,089 --> 00:31:22,564
Ward 10.
480
00:31:22,565 --> 00:31:24,133
Emergency.
481
00:31:24,134 --> 00:31:27,345
Yes, Sister.
482
00:31:27,346 --> 00:31:29,008
Nurse. What is it?
483
00:31:29,009 --> 00:31:30,223
It isn't.
Isn't what?
484
00:31:30,224 --> 00:31:31,886
He isn't. That man.
485
00:31:31,887 --> 00:31:33,476
Which man isn't what?
486
00:31:33,477 --> 00:31:35,681
The man with Matron
isn't Sir Theodore.
487
00:31:35,682 --> 00:31:40,691
Goodness gracious!
488
00:31:40,692 --> 00:31:44,315
Matron, that man's not Sir Theodore.
He's an imposter.
489
00:31:44,316 --> 00:31:45,358
What?!
490
00:31:59,586 --> 00:32:00,998
You're not Sir Theodore.
491
00:32:00,999 --> 00:32:02,768
I never said I was.
492
00:32:02,769 --> 00:32:04,465
Leave this instant.
493
00:32:04,466 --> 00:32:06,552
Some other time, eh? When you need
a helping hand. Tell your friends.
494
00:32:18,564 --> 00:32:20,768
That's definitely my best side.
495
00:32:20,769 --> 00:32:22,662
For what, Mr Courtenay?
496
00:32:22,663 --> 00:32:24,485
Nothing, I was just...
497
00:32:24,486 --> 00:32:28,651
Hoping the photography job
might go your way?
498
00:32:28,652 --> 00:32:30,324
What photography job?
499
00:32:30,325 --> 00:32:33,218
Would you like me to pencil you in?
500
00:32:33,219 --> 00:32:36,038
Yes. I photographed well as a child.
501
00:32:36,039 --> 00:32:40,960
My relatives treasure portraits
of me. I was curly.
502
00:32:40,961 --> 00:32:42,665
You weren't!
503
00:32:42,666 --> 00:32:44,922
Yes!
504
00:32:44,923 --> 00:32:47,800
How lovely you must have been.
505
00:32:47,801 --> 00:32:53,598
Suggest me for it. I'd like to know
how I'd photograph in my maturity.
506
00:32:53,599 --> 00:32:56,470
I haven't been done professionally
for ages.
507
00:32:56,471 --> 00:32:58,389
Leave it to me.
508
00:32:58,390 --> 00:33:04,442
Thank you.
509
00:33:04,443 --> 00:33:07,737
Good morning, gentlemen.
510
00:33:07,738 --> 00:33:10,239
I'm your model.
511
00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:13,367
Can't believe it, eh? I understand.
512
00:33:13,368 --> 00:33:16,682
There's no point being modest
513
00:33:16,683 --> 00:33:21,710
- I have the perfect
face for photography.
514
00:33:23,670 --> 00:33:28,461
We're very grateful. None of
the top models would do it...
515
00:33:28,462 --> 00:33:30,635
Sorry. Would do, I mean.
516
00:33:30,636 --> 00:33:34,680
Some of us have got it
and some of us haven't.
517
00:33:34,681 --> 00:33:37,016
You've got it, all right.
518
00:33:37,017 --> 00:33:42,266
Soon thousands of poster hoardings
will have it, too - my face.
519
00:33:42,267 --> 00:33:43,476
Won't you sit down?
520
00:33:43,477 --> 00:33:46,484
Thank you.
521
00:33:46,485 --> 00:33:49,106
Well, gentlemen, ready when you are.
522
00:33:49,107 --> 00:33:51,739
Let's go.
523
00:33:51,740 --> 00:33:55,196
Take your time.
I'm difficult to light, I know.
524
00:33:55,197 --> 00:33:57,328
You're lit.
525
00:33:57,329 --> 00:34:00,498
Oh, you know your job, I must say.
526
00:34:00,499 --> 00:34:04,288
What's the product we're selling?
I mean...
527
00:34:04,289 --> 00:34:05,332
Keep quite still.
528
00:34:44,334 --> 00:34:46,247
Good morning, Sam.
529
00:34:46,248 --> 00:34:48,671
Good morning, you say?
530
00:34:48,672 --> 00:34:51,424
Look at that - you're late.
531
00:34:51,425 --> 00:34:53,984
Only a minute. No-one else is in.
532
00:34:53,985 --> 00:34:56,470
"Only a minute" she says. Charming.
533
00:34:56,471 --> 00:35:01,934
What if Caesar had only been
a minute for the Spanish Armada...?
534
00:35:01,935 --> 00:35:04,849
I don't know what I'm talking about.
535
00:35:04,850 --> 00:35:07,481
Sam, are you in trouble?
536
00:35:07,482 --> 00:35:09,025
The worst.
537
00:35:09,026 --> 00:35:13,154
What's her name?
Oh, please, it's worse than that.
538
00:35:13,155 --> 00:35:19,410
Tell me about it and your worries
will disappear like a puff of smoke.
539
00:35:19,620 --> 00:35:24,368
If you've got a hangover,
it must be a corker. Take my tip...
540
00:35:24,369 --> 00:35:28,252
Corker, tip...
541
00:35:28,253 --> 00:35:31,672
Sam, what on earth is the matter?
542
00:35:31,673 --> 00:35:34,967
I want it.
543
00:35:34,968 --> 00:35:38,632
No! Cigarette, damn it.
544
00:35:38,633 --> 00:35:40,339
Well, have one.
545
00:35:40,340 --> 00:35:42,225
I've given it up.
546
00:35:42,226 --> 00:35:43,554
Then don't have one.
547
00:35:43,555 --> 00:35:46,687
I want one.
Make up your mind!
548
00:35:46,688 --> 00:35:49,607
I have - to give it up.
549
00:35:49,608 --> 00:35:51,729
Well, there's an end to it.
550
00:35:51,730 --> 00:35:52,860
But I want one.
551
00:35:52,861 --> 00:35:56,530
How long have you been like this?
552
00:35:56,532 --> 00:35:59,945
Since yesterday lunch time, really.
This is hell!
553
00:35:59,946 --> 00:36:03,365
I've got the answer - a sweet.
554
00:36:03,366 --> 00:36:05,248
A sweet.
555
00:36:05,249 --> 00:36:07,750
They'll make you fat.
556
00:36:07,751 --> 00:36:12,171
I couldn't stand inactivity
without a sweet.
557
00:36:12,172 --> 00:36:14,168
Self-indulgency. No willpower.
558
00:36:14,169 --> 00:36:15,508
Look who's talking!
559
00:36:15,509 --> 00:36:17,593
I can talk if I want to.
560
00:36:17,594 --> 00:36:20,341
I've been without it for 24 hours.
561
00:36:20,342 --> 00:36:21,568
Without what?
562
00:36:21,569 --> 00:36:22,723
A cigarette.
563
00:36:22,724 --> 00:36:24,804
You made me say that!
564
00:36:24,805 --> 00:36:26,969
Oh, look at my sweets!
565
00:36:26,970 --> 00:36:29,438
Trying to make me say it.
566
00:36:29,439 --> 00:36:33,317
Sorry, darling.
Smoke... Smoke, see?
567
00:36:33,318 --> 00:36:35,444
Can't do without it.
568
00:36:35,445 --> 00:36:39,616
I must have a smoke!
I must! I must! I must!
569
00:37:11,982 --> 00:37:13,644
Better now?
570
00:37:13,645 --> 00:37:15,484
Oh, yeah.
571
00:37:15,485 --> 00:37:19,656
Sir Walter Raleigh
certainly earned his knighthood.
572
00:37:24,203 --> 00:37:30,416
Isn't that strange?
Just a few puffs of that.
573
00:37:30,626 --> 00:37:34,796
Oh, it makes the whole world look
sort of all... most peculiar.
574
00:37:40,844 --> 00:37:43,137
Sam!
575
00:37:43,138 --> 00:37:46,432
Sam!
576
00:37:46,433 --> 00:37:49,393
It'll pass away.
577
00:37:49,394 --> 00:37:51,312
So will you by the look of you.
578
00:37:51,313 --> 00:37:56,859
Don't worry. It's like this when you
start smoking again after a lay-off.
579
00:37:58,946 --> 00:38:03,574
Can you... Can you get up?
580
00:38:03,575 --> 00:38:05,368
Cigarette.
Sam, no.
581
00:38:05,369 --> 00:38:07,620
Please, Lil. Cigarette.
582
00:38:07,621 --> 00:38:10,034
No, you are going to give it up.
583
00:38:10,035 --> 00:38:12,333
I can't give it up, Lil.
584
00:38:12,334 --> 00:38:17,625
I've tried six times and always end
up like this. I'm a slave to them.
585
00:38:17,626 --> 00:38:21,092
Six times. It's disgraceful.
586
00:38:21,093 --> 00:38:23,631
This time
you are going through with it.
587
00:38:23,632 --> 00:38:26,055
No. I can't.
588
00:38:26,056 --> 00:38:30,351
Yes, you can.
All you need is a helping hand.
589
00:38:30,352 --> 00:38:35,815
A helping hand who needs a helping
hand! I'm going to help you.
590
00:38:35,816 --> 00:38:41,649
How? I won't have a single sweet,
you won't have a single draw.
591
00:38:41,650 --> 00:38:44,282
We'll both do without.
592
00:38:44,283 --> 00:38:46,320
No sweets.
593
00:38:46,321 --> 00:38:47,364
No draws!
594
00:38:55,419 --> 00:38:58,796
Weiss du, was du bist?
595
00:38:58,797 --> 00:39:03,092
Du bist ein ganz ekelhafter,
lumpiger Kerl!
596
00:39:03,093 --> 00:39:04,088
Ich hab' die Nase voll von dir.
597
00:39:04,089 --> 00:39:06,137
Excuse me a minute.
598
00:39:06,138 --> 00:39:08,717
Wer immer das mag sein,
mach ihn weg.
599
00:39:08,719 --> 00:39:12,643
Just a moment, dear.
600
00:39:12,644 --> 00:39:15,605
Mr Trellorny? I'm from Help...
601
00:39:15,606 --> 00:39:18,316
Yes, yes, I know. Come in.
602
00:39:18,317 --> 00:39:19,687
You can start work at once.
603
00:39:19,688 --> 00:39:22,904
Thank you.
604
00:39:22,905 --> 00:39:27,283
My dear, would you repeat
what you said just now?
605
00:39:27,284 --> 00:39:32,366
Ich glaub', du hast mich sehr gut
verstanden. Raus mit ihm!
606
00:39:32,367 --> 00:39:34,761
The lady wishes me to leave, sir.
607
00:39:34,762 --> 00:39:37,335
I'm paying you and I say you stay.
608
00:39:37,336 --> 00:39:42,710
Schick den verdammten Trottel fort!
609
00:39:42,711 --> 00:39:44,250
Good gracious me!
610
00:39:44,251 --> 00:39:45,755
What's she saying?
611
00:39:45,756 --> 00:39:48,632
Eh?
You're meant to listen. Translate.
612
00:39:48,633 --> 00:39:51,140
No, not in front of a lady.
613
00:39:51,141 --> 00:39:54,936
Idiotisches Rindvieh, Sie!
614
00:39:54,937 --> 00:39:56,312
Oh, I say!
615
00:39:56,313 --> 00:39:58,309
I don't care what you say.
What did she say?
616
00:39:58,310 --> 00:40:01,734
No, I couldn't. Oh, no.
617
00:40:01,735 --> 00:40:02,944
Trevor...
618
00:40:02,945 --> 00:40:05,613
Ah, that's better. Trevor.
619
00:40:05,614 --> 00:40:10,696
My name's the same in any language.
What are we arguing about?
620
00:40:10,697 --> 00:40:12,411
Ha!
Ha!
621
00:40:12,412 --> 00:40:14,956
Would you elaborate?
622
00:40:14,957 --> 00:40:20,711
Wenn er nicht vor der Tur sitzt,
dann ist weg mit deinem Kopf!
623
00:40:20,712 --> 00:40:24,251
If I can't leave immediately,
there's to be a physical assault...
624
00:40:24,252 --> 00:40:26,968
Stand your ground.
625
00:40:26,969 --> 00:40:29,804
On you! If you'd let me finish.
626
00:40:29,805 --> 00:40:33,516
Da du einen Dolmetscher hier
gestellt hast...
627
00:40:33,517 --> 00:40:39,605
As you have an interpreter here,
you needn't be ignorant...
628
00:40:40,023 --> 00:40:43,609
..of my sorrow and anger.
629
00:40:43,610 --> 00:40:44,610
Es ist dies -
It is this -
630
00:40:44,611 --> 00:40:46,988
Even I can get that.
631
00:40:46,989 --> 00:40:50,194
..wenn eine Frau eine neue Frisur
hat und einen neuen Hut...
632
00:40:50,195 --> 00:40:54,287
When a wife has a new hairstyle
and new hat...
633
00:40:54,288 --> 00:40:56,492
..erwartet sie,
dass ihr Mann davon Notiz nimmt!
634
00:40:56,493 --> 00:40:58,541
..she wants it noted.
635
00:40:58,542 --> 00:41:00,001
Und wenn er das nicht tut...
636
00:41:00,002 --> 00:41:04,458
When it is not so,
that can only mean one thing.
637
00:41:04,459 --> 00:41:05,501
..dass seine Interessen
woanders liegt.
638
00:41:05,502 --> 00:41:08,092
His interest is elsewhere.
639
00:41:08,093 --> 00:41:12,425
Wahrscheinlich bei seiner neuen
Schlampe von einer Stenotypistin!
640
00:41:12,426 --> 00:41:16,559
Probably with his trollop secretary.
641
00:41:16,560 --> 00:41:18,681
Is that all?
642
00:41:18,682 --> 00:41:20,229
Alles?!
All?!
643
00:41:20,230 --> 00:41:22,565
You silly girl!
644
00:41:22,566 --> 00:41:25,062
Wagst du es,
mich ein dummes Madel zu nennen?
645
00:41:25,063 --> 00:41:27,314
Don't call me a silly girl.
646
00:41:27,315 --> 00:41:28,696
Oh, but you are.
647
00:41:28,697 --> 00:41:33,951
Ich bin es nicht! Ich bin
eine tief leidenschaftliche Frau.
648
00:41:36,038 --> 00:41:39,832
I'm not.
I'm a deeply passionate woman.
649
00:41:39,833 --> 00:41:41,459
Oh, I know, I know.
650
00:41:41,460 --> 00:41:43,622
Du behandelst mich
aber nicht als eine Solche.
651
00:41:43,623 --> 00:41:46,459
You don't behave as if I was one.
652
00:41:46,460 --> 00:41:48,549
How can you say that?
653
00:41:48,550 --> 00:41:54,680
Fur eine ganze Woche hast du mir
kein Zeichen deiner Liebe gegeben.
654
00:41:54,890 --> 00:41:58,804
For a week,
you've shown no love towards me.
655
00:41:58,805 --> 00:42:00,519
I was too tired.
656
00:42:00,521 --> 00:42:03,184
Ja, gewiss - meiner Mude!
657
00:42:03,185 --> 00:42:04,640
Yes, tired of me.
658
00:42:04,641 --> 00:42:06,025
No, no, darling.
659
00:42:06,026 --> 00:42:09,320
Es ist alles die Sekretarin.
660
00:42:09,321 --> 00:42:10,364
It's that stenographer.
661
00:42:18,372 --> 00:42:20,206
There's no need to be so convincing.
662
00:42:20,207 --> 00:42:24,502
I can't help it.
I think your wife's got a point.
663
00:42:24,503 --> 00:42:28,130
You're here to translate, not judge.
664
00:42:28,131 --> 00:42:30,841
Do you come from a broken home?
665
00:42:30,843 --> 00:42:32,802
As a matter of fact, I don't.
666
00:42:32,803 --> 00:42:37,515
Well, I do.
I beg of you, think of your children.
667
00:42:37,516 --> 00:42:39,267
Ja, aber horen Sie!
668
00:42:39,268 --> 00:42:40,518
We haven't got any children.
669
00:42:40,519 --> 00:42:45,314
You won't have, like this.
You tired, you with your hats.
670
00:42:45,315 --> 00:42:47,401
You should be ashamed of yourselves.
671
00:42:55,993 --> 00:42:59,412
Please... don't upset yourself.
672
00:42:59,413 --> 00:43:02,415
I can't help it.
673
00:43:02,416 --> 00:43:06,210
You're back in English.
Does that mean...
674
00:43:06,211 --> 00:43:11,877
It means our trivialities are
nothing compared to the turmoil...
675
00:43:11,878 --> 00:43:15,845
..of this delicate and wounded soul.
676
00:43:15,846 --> 00:43:20,433
Make up, you two.
That's the only thing to help me.
677
00:43:20,434 --> 00:43:26,439
If only for my sake, make up.
678
00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:29,317
All right, then. All right.
679
00:43:29,318 --> 00:43:33,175
Yes. Yes, nice.
680
00:43:33,176 --> 00:43:34,342
Seconds out.
681
00:43:34,344 --> 00:43:37,846
Lofty Benson! Cor blimey!
682
00:43:37,847 --> 00:43:43,138
Bert Handy. A little older, but I'd
recognise that ugly mug anywhere.
683
00:43:43,139 --> 00:43:46,146
You helped make it like this!
684
00:43:46,147 --> 00:43:47,230
Let's sit down and have a natter.
685
00:43:47,231 --> 00:43:53,028
This is business, can't stop.
I need a couple of seconds tonight.
686
00:43:53,029 --> 00:43:54,321
You're not going back in the ring?
687
00:43:54,322 --> 00:44:00,577
Only the corner. I'm in management.
My fighter's Dynamite Dan Grimsby.
688
00:44:00,787 --> 00:44:04,618
Never heard of him.
You will after his fight tonight.
689
00:44:04,619 --> 00:44:06,374
Who's he fighting?
Mickey McGee.
690
00:44:06,376 --> 00:44:07,912
Massive Mickey? Are you punchy?
691
00:44:07,914 --> 00:44:10,170
My kid's dynamite.
692
00:44:10,171 --> 00:44:13,590
I'll come myself tonight, gee him on.
693
00:44:13,591 --> 00:44:16,171
Will you?
And the seconds are on the house.
694
00:44:16,172 --> 00:44:18,257
Good old Bert!
695
00:44:33,319 --> 00:44:35,612
Hulking great brute!
And such a show-off!
696
00:44:39,784 --> 00:44:42,744
Bit nervy. There, not to worry.
697
00:44:42,745 --> 00:44:45,914
Just one big whack in his fat belly.
698
00:44:45,915 --> 00:44:48,787
That'll knock the wind out of him.
699
00:44:48,788 --> 00:44:50,377
Who? Me?
700
00:44:50,378 --> 00:44:52,463
I give the advice around here.
Massage his back.
701
00:45:03,641 --> 00:45:06,017
Aargh! Oooh!
702
00:45:06,019 --> 00:45:08,619
So sorry. I do beg your pardon.
703
00:45:08,620 --> 00:45:12,065
Owww! He's hurt my finger. Owww!
704
00:45:12,066 --> 00:45:14,568
Get this one off, too.
705
00:45:14,569 --> 00:45:16,611
Oooooh!
706
00:45:16,612 --> 00:45:18,029
You'll be all right, son.
707
00:45:18,031 --> 00:45:22,070
It's a right horrible sprain.
I can't fight.
708
00:45:22,071 --> 00:45:23,076
You've got to.
709
00:45:23,077 --> 00:45:27,247
With one hand?
How can you be so inhuman?
710
00:45:27,248 --> 00:45:29,577
Shut up! Listen, Dan, Dan...
711
00:45:29,579 --> 00:45:32,085
..is a very hurt man.
712
00:45:32,086 --> 00:45:35,589
Ready, champ?
713
00:45:35,590 --> 00:45:36,631
Ready?
714
00:45:36,632 --> 00:45:38,420
No, not tonight.
715
00:45:38,421 --> 00:45:41,178
Eh?
716
00:45:41,179 --> 00:45:46,433
He's only sprained his little finger.
717
00:45:46,434 --> 00:45:51,104
Ladies and gentlemen,
your attention, please.
718
00:45:51,105 --> 00:45:54,635
Dynamite Dan Grimsby is forced to
719
00:45:54,636 --> 00:45:59,447
withdraw owing to a
sprained little finger.
720
00:46:00,573 --> 00:46:05,619
In place of the main bout...
721
00:46:05,620 --> 00:46:08,997
Oh, you unsympathetic lump!
722
00:46:08,998 --> 00:46:11,348
Why doesn't somebody punch him?
723
00:46:11,349 --> 00:46:13,435
Why don't you? It's your fault.
724
00:46:26,015 --> 00:46:28,517
Gabe!
725
00:46:28,518 --> 00:46:33,939
Come here, Gabe.
726
00:46:33,940 --> 00:46:37,943
Hey, you. Come on back and fight.
727
00:46:37,944 --> 00:46:43,031
What are you waiting for?
Do I have to strike the first blow?
728
00:46:43,032 --> 00:46:51,374
Very well, then,
don't say I didn't warn you.
729
00:46:51,833 --> 00:47:00,174
Oh, no, I'm not ready.
730
00:47:05,221 --> 00:47:13,563
Hey, ref! He can't hit him,
he's got his glasses on!
731
00:47:30,913 --> 00:47:39,255
Come on, Gabe! Get at him!
732
00:47:44,635 --> 00:47:47,512
Run, Gabe! Run!
733
00:47:47,513 --> 00:47:52,392
Faster!
734
00:47:52,393 --> 00:48:00,735
Get out! Jump out!
735
00:48:06,574 --> 00:48:10,368
He's coming, Gabe!
736
00:48:10,370 --> 00:48:16,625
He's got him!
737
00:48:16,626 --> 00:48:24,967
Well done, Gabe!
738
00:48:31,849 --> 00:48:34,851
Yes?
739
00:48:34,852 --> 00:48:39,398
I see. How very disappointing.
740
00:48:39,399 --> 00:48:43,819
I shall have to make
alternative arrangements.
741
00:48:43,820 --> 00:48:52,161
Take care. Goodbye.
742
00:49:00,795 --> 00:49:04,172
Helping Hands Ltd.
743
00:49:04,173 --> 00:49:08,838
I beg your pardon? I'm sorry, sir,
I can't understand...
744
00:49:08,839 --> 00:49:11,596
Oh! Too loud now.
745
00:49:11,597 --> 00:49:14,975
I still can't understand.
746
00:49:14,976 --> 00:49:18,437
Now, sir, what was it you wanted?
747
00:49:18,438 --> 00:49:21,898
Yes... yes...
748
00:49:21,899 --> 00:49:24,568
The what?! Are you sure?
749
00:49:24,569 --> 00:49:30,323
Well, I'm sorry, but I find it
difficult to understand you.
750
00:49:30,324 --> 00:49:33,697
Yes,
of course I've got a note of it.
751
00:49:33,698 --> 00:49:36,663
Forth Bridge, rest assured.
752
00:49:36,664 --> 00:49:44,171
Goodbye.
753
00:49:44,172 --> 00:49:47,257
Oh, I wish I'd turned it down.
754
00:49:47,258 --> 00:49:51,636
I'm glad you didn't.
I mean, this to me is... it...
755
00:49:51,637 --> 00:49:58,185
..it's adventure. It's like -
what's it called? - "The 39 Steps".
756
00:49:58,186 --> 00:50:04,357
Oh, I didn't hear him very well.
It's all so indefinite.
757
00:50:04,359 --> 00:50:10,906
But these things usually are.
The agent cool, alert and debonair.
758
00:50:10,907 --> 00:50:17,954
He's only ever given a rendezvous;
he receives his instructions there.
759
00:50:17,955 --> 00:50:21,792
I might even be contacted
on the train.
760
00:50:21,793 --> 00:50:28,507
Ah, Scotland -
lot of hydroelectric stuff up there.
761
00:50:28,508 --> 00:50:32,589
Bet this has something to do
with atomic energy.
762
00:50:32,590 --> 00:50:36,598
Gracious,
I hope you don't end up in Russia!
763
00:50:36,599 --> 00:50:41,890
If I do, I shall behave as an
ex-corporal of the Pioneers should.
764
00:50:41,891 --> 00:50:45,435
Name, rank and number,
and hands off my shovel.
765
00:50:45,436 --> 00:50:48,944
Don't go! Think of brainwashing!
766
00:50:48,945 --> 00:50:52,531
How can they wash what isn't there?
767
00:50:52,532 --> 00:50:57,911
Er, by that I mean
I don't know anything. Yet.
768
00:50:57,912 --> 00:51:06,254
Excuse me, Miss Cooling, my train.
769
00:51:06,295 --> 00:51:09,042
Well, au revoir, Miss Cooling.
770
00:51:09,043 --> 00:51:11,675
Or maybe goodbye.
771
00:51:11,676 --> 00:51:20,018
Oh, dear!
772
00:51:37,785 --> 00:51:40,704
Going all the way?
773
00:51:40,705 --> 00:51:42,080
Uh-huh.
774
00:51:42,081 --> 00:51:49,963
That's our man, then.
775
00:51:49,964 --> 00:51:58,306
Oh!
776
00:52:38,262 --> 00:52:40,263
Thank you.
777
00:52:40,264 --> 00:52:43,392
You're not English.
778
00:52:43,393 --> 00:52:46,812
And you're not Chinese - so what?
779
00:52:46,813 --> 00:52:51,900
So this -
we might be on the same journey.
780
00:52:51,901 --> 00:53:00,243
Of course we are.
781
00:53:25,268 --> 00:53:27,561
OK, I'm persevering.
782
00:53:27,562 --> 00:53:29,646
I don't like it.
783
00:53:29,647 --> 00:53:32,435
Quit the pretence, I'm your man.
784
00:53:32,436 --> 00:53:33,859
What?!
785
00:53:33,860 --> 00:53:39,656
I'm glad we met. I wasn't looking
forward to jumping off the train.
786
00:53:39,657 --> 00:53:44,411
Huh?! But if you say
we jump, then we jump.
787
00:53:44,412 --> 00:53:52,754
Can we talk this over
somewhere less public?
788
00:53:53,254 --> 00:54:01,596
Sorry, mate.
Ugh, brown Windsor! Ugh!
789
00:54:05,391 --> 00:54:08,784
' This is it.
Here's the bridge.'
790
00:54:08,785 --> 00:54:12,355
'Listen, you've got to jump out.'
791
00:54:12,357 --> 00:54:17,277
There's not going to be any contact
on the train.'
792
00:54:17,278 --> 00:54:21,192
'When you jump,
let every muscle go slack.'
793
00:54:21,193 --> 00:54:23,408
'NOT NOW, STUPID!'
794
00:54:23,409 --> 00:54:26,620
'When you jump.'
795
00:54:26,621 --> 00:54:32,725
'You're not nervous now, are you?'
796
00:54:32,726 --> 00:54:35,879
No!
797
00:54:35,880 --> 00:54:39,194
'OK, kid, near the bridge now
798
00:54:39,195 --> 00:54:44,222
- your rendezvous,
the bridge. Get going!'
799
00:54:44,681 --> 00:54:51,103
'Maybe... maybe there is a contact
on the train... waiting for you.'
800
00:54:51,104 --> 00:54:57,729
'Yes, that's it - waiting till the last
minute - yes - to test your nerve...
801
00:54:57,730 --> 00:55:06,072
to see if you will prepare to jump.'
802
00:55:15,920 --> 00:55:17,045
'Scuse me.
803
00:55:17,046 --> 00:55:20,465
Have you any orders for me, sir?
804
00:55:20,466 --> 00:55:23,004
Orders?! I just want to pass.
805
00:55:23,005 --> 00:55:24,607
Sure, sir?
806
00:55:24,608 --> 00:55:26,138
Quite sure.
807
00:55:26,139 --> 00:55:27,926
Don't you want me for anything, sir?
808
00:55:27,927 --> 00:55:36,269
No, I do not!
809
00:56:38,586 --> 00:56:43,006
Helping Hands... Oh, yes...
Oh, it's you!
810
00:56:43,007 --> 00:56:48,465
Oh, yes, most honoured we are, sir.
I trust it's going according to plan.
811
00:56:48,466 --> 00:56:53,136
My man went to the Forth Bridge...
812
00:56:53,137 --> 00:56:54,559
Went where?
813
00:56:54,560 --> 00:56:57,641
To the Forth Bridge, as you said.
814
00:56:57,642 --> 00:57:01,191
No! I wanted a fourth at bridge!
815
00:57:01,192 --> 00:57:09,534
Oh... a fourth at bridge...
816
00:57:23,881 --> 00:57:26,049
This is it, Mr Handy.
817
00:57:26,050 --> 00:57:27,885
Thank you, Miss Cooling.
818
00:57:27,886 --> 00:57:32,550
No matter how well a firm
is doing, it needs publicity.
819
00:57:32,552 --> 00:57:34,171
Yeah. Shut up!
820
00:57:34,172 --> 00:57:41,691
And that could well be the
finest publicity we could have.
821
00:57:43,943 --> 00:57:49,234
Obviously, in a kitchen like this
work is a luxurious pleasure.
822
00:57:49,235 --> 00:57:55,245
You can do so many things at once.
823
00:57:55,246 --> 00:57:57,367
Good set-up, old chap.
824
00:57:57,368 --> 00:58:00,370
Thank you, sir.
But the PC's missing. The PC?
825
00:58:00,371 --> 00:58:02,586
Popsy cupboard.
826
00:58:02,587 --> 00:58:06,256
Now, musn't be naughty!
827
00:58:06,257 --> 00:58:14,599
Unimanual control, and it will go
as fast as you like. Observe!
828
00:58:19,145 --> 00:58:27,487
I say! There is a popsy cupboard
after all.
829
00:58:29,238 --> 00:58:37,580
Perfect safety. Fixed in a flash
and unfixed likewise.
830
00:58:55,306 --> 00:58:59,768
None of you children want to rock
on the rocking horse?
831
00:58:59,769 --> 00:59:01,806
Ride it yourself!
832
00:59:01,807 --> 00:59:03,772
I know what you want.
833
00:59:03,773 --> 00:59:07,734
Come along, a swing -
anyone like a swing?
834
00:59:07,735 --> 00:59:09,945
No.
835
00:59:09,946 --> 00:59:12,155
I'll have a swing myself.
836
00:59:12,156 --> 00:59:20,498
Just to show you. Isn't it lovely?
Look at me! Oh!
837
00:59:28,423 --> 00:59:32,691
The safety belt makes
window-cleaning so cosy.
838
00:59:32,692 --> 00:59:37,305
It pays for itself
in six tiny months. Ridiculous!
839
00:59:37,306 --> 00:59:42,389
Won't any little boy or girl sit
on the other end and rock with me?
840
00:59:42,390 --> 00:59:44,771
No!
841
00:59:44,772 --> 00:59:49,109
To unharness the safety belt,
all you do is AAAGH!
842
00:59:49,110 --> 00:59:52,404
Oh!
843
00:59:52,405 --> 00:59:54,505
I'm sorry, Lily.
844
00:59:54,506 --> 00:59:58,910
You made a wave!
845
00:59:58,911 --> 01:00:02,122
Who's the boiler?
846
01:00:02,123 --> 01:00:04,499
Ooh!
847
01:00:04,500 --> 01:00:10,088
May I ask you to move closer?
848
01:00:10,089 --> 01:00:13,693
Thank you. I do not wish
to raise my voice too
849
01:00:13,694 --> 01:00:17,757
loudly, in case I wake the
people in the next house.
850
01:00:17,758 --> 01:00:23,185
May I introduce you to the Bed
of the Century? Here it is.
851
01:00:23,186 --> 01:00:29,983
Whatever you do in bed,
this bed helps you do it better.
852
01:00:29,984 --> 01:00:34,065
Do you not believe me, madam?
Come to bed with me!
853
01:00:34,066 --> 01:00:37,986
First...
the neighbours may be watching...
854
01:00:37,987 --> 01:00:40,077
That's better.
855
01:00:40,078 --> 01:00:48,419
And so, to bed,
and we will find out.
856
01:00:57,512 --> 01:01:03,809
A little television, perhaps?
857
01:01:03,810 --> 01:01:09,022
The early morning cup of tea?
858
01:01:09,023 --> 01:01:12,234
Or maybe you fancy a snack?
859
01:01:12,235 --> 01:01:16,780
La buffet.
860
01:01:16,781 --> 01:01:23,912
Perhaps you would like
a nice, cosy read?
861
01:01:23,913 --> 01:01:27,624
Voila!
862
01:01:27,625 --> 01:01:33,588
Or maybe you've come to bed merely
to sleep? Can happen, of course.
863
01:01:33,589 --> 01:01:41,638
Very well... Just recline
on the Bed of the Century.
864
01:01:41,639 --> 01:01:44,766
Ooh!
865
01:01:44,767 --> 01:01:47,686
The position not quite right, no?
866
01:01:47,687 --> 01:01:51,106
How often that can happen.
867
01:01:51,107 --> 01:01:56,236
The Bed of the Century will solve
this small problem for you.
868
01:01:56,237 --> 01:01:58,635
Merely recline
- do not move.
869
01:01:58,636 --> 01:02:03,113
Our mould-to-the-body
mattress does it all for you.
870
01:02:03,114 --> 01:02:08,707
Watch, watch, watch.
871
01:02:08,708 --> 01:02:13,795
Eh? What's going on?
872
01:02:13,796 --> 01:02:22,137
Fred! There's something wrong
with the bed, Fred!
873
01:02:22,138 --> 01:02:30,480
Wagon train!
874
01:02:32,565 --> 01:02:40,907
One for the pot!
875
01:02:59,318 --> 01:03:01,444
You're not our Lou.
876
01:03:01,445 --> 01:03:07,742
No. Your Lou's a bit off colour
today, so I come to take his place.
877
01:03:07,743 --> 01:03:09,994
In there? Never!
878
01:03:09,995 --> 01:03:13,665
It's OK, I know the rule - silence.
879
01:03:13,666 --> 01:03:16,042
You're not trained for it.
880
01:03:16,043 --> 01:03:19,087
Oh, come, come, come, please, Sarge.
881
01:03:19,088 --> 01:03:27,429
What training do you need to keep
quiet for a few hours? Don't worry!
882
01:03:35,182 --> 01:03:43,524
Shh!
883
01:05:28,843 --> 01:05:32,679
Quiet! Quiet!
884
01:05:32,680 --> 01:05:36,432
QUIET!!!
885
01:05:36,433 --> 01:05:44,775
You mustn't speak!
886
01:05:45,651 --> 01:05:48,403
Good morning, Mr Handy.
887
01:05:48,404 --> 01:05:50,108
You look dazed.
888
01:05:50,109 --> 01:05:54,784
I am.
889
01:05:54,785 --> 01:05:56,869
What's it all for?
890
01:05:56,871 --> 01:05:59,539
Streamlined organisation.
891
01:05:59,540 --> 01:06:04,997
If it's good for the business,
of course. Perhaps you'll explain.
892
01:06:04,998 --> 01:06:07,559
I have made terrible mistakes.
893
01:06:07,560 --> 01:06:10,049
You're a tower of strength!
894
01:06:10,050 --> 01:06:15,847
Every tower needs foundations,
and these are mine.
895
01:06:15,848 --> 01:06:21,222
Each job is filed here, cross-
referenced there, costed here...
896
01:06:21,223 --> 01:06:24,355
..assigned to an available operator.
897
01:06:24,356 --> 01:06:28,938
All of which is secondary
to the operative procedure.
898
01:06:28,939 --> 01:06:37,281
Oh, yes, operative, yeah.
899
01:06:38,204 --> 01:06:46,545
Oh, b...
900
01:06:52,092 --> 01:07:00,434
Oh, I don't suppose it'll matter.
901
01:07:02,686 --> 01:07:04,536
Morning!
902
01:07:04,537 --> 01:07:06,522
Morning.
903
01:07:06,524 --> 01:07:08,358
Ingenious system, eh?
904
01:07:08,359 --> 01:07:11,606
Oh, yes. No possibility of error?
905
01:07:11,607 --> 01:07:13,062
None whatsoever.
906
01:07:13,063 --> 01:07:14,484
Going my way?
907
01:07:14,485 --> 01:07:15,531
No.
908
01:07:15,533 --> 01:07:17,867
I thought we'd share a taxi.
909
01:07:17,868 --> 01:07:21,579
Well,
I'm already thinking in Chinese.
910
01:07:21,580 --> 01:07:26,292
Chinese?
Interpreting's my job today. Bye!
911
01:07:26,293 --> 01:07:30,082
Chinese - I wonder if it's true
what they say.
912
01:07:30,084 --> 01:07:38,425
Francis!
913
01:07:40,850 --> 01:07:42,595
Good morning, Madam.
914
01:07:42,596 --> 01:07:43,635
Toushan.
915
01:07:43,636 --> 01:07:45,198
Pardon?
916
01:07:45,199 --> 01:07:47,126
Toushan.
917
01:07:47,127 --> 01:07:49,440
Of course!
918
01:07:49,441 --> 01:07:50,526
Coincidence
919
01:07:50,527 --> 01:07:56,739
- a friend of mine has gone all
Chinese this morning as well.
920
01:07:56,740 --> 01:08:05,082
May - I - come - in?
921
01:08:16,510 --> 01:08:20,763
Please! Wait a minute! Look, please!
922
01:08:20,764 --> 01:08:23,057
There's been a mistake.
923
01:08:23,058 --> 01:08:26,806
Mistake? It's impossible.
Gracious me!
924
01:08:26,807 --> 01:08:35,149
This must be Fr-Francisesis's job.
925
01:08:36,822 --> 01:08:38,589
What platform for Ely?
926
01:08:38,590 --> 01:08:40,283
Number one, over there.
927
01:08:40,284 --> 01:08:48,626
Thank you. I'll show them
if I need a keeper.
928
01:08:48,709 --> 01:08:53,838
Come along, girls.
929
01:08:53,839 --> 01:08:56,043
Good morning.
I'm your Helping Hand, I fancy.
930
01:08:56,045 --> 01:08:57,926
Go away.
931
01:08:57,927 --> 01:09:02,508
Oh, you expected me to be Chinese.
932
01:09:02,509 --> 01:09:04,057
Chinese?
933
01:09:04,058 --> 01:09:06,700
I expected your girls
to be Chinese too.
934
01:09:06,701 --> 01:09:09,307
I don't know
what you're talking about.
935
01:09:09,308 --> 01:09:12,602
As soon as I saw their breast...
936
01:09:12,603 --> 01:09:14,025
I beg your pardon!
937
01:09:14,026 --> 01:09:18,024
Breast pockets.
I put two and two together.
938
01:09:18,025 --> 01:09:19,447
I want a policeman.
939
01:09:19,448 --> 01:09:22,784
I'll offer you
a much better service.
940
01:09:22,785 --> 01:09:27,679
I speak Chinese,
with a slight Cantonese accent.
941
01:09:27,680 --> 01:09:32,710
An interesting group of girls,
European, of course.
942
01:09:32,711 --> 01:09:37,326
On their first contact with
London they'll need me to,
943
01:09:37,327 --> 01:09:39,509
er... Shall we begin?
944
01:09:39,510 --> 01:09:40,760
Begin what?
945
01:09:40,761 --> 01:09:45,593
I'll go in the first taxi
with some of the girls...
946
01:09:45,594 --> 01:09:48,269
Police!
Madam...
947
01:09:48,270 --> 01:09:50,019
Police!
948
01:09:50,020 --> 01:09:51,437
What's the trouble?
949
01:09:51,438 --> 01:09:55,436
I'm ready to pick up
this woman's girls.
950
01:09:55,437 --> 01:09:57,605
Oh?
Yes, I speak Chinese.
951
01:09:57,606 --> 01:10:00,733
You speak what?
Can't you understand English?
952
01:10:00,734 --> 01:10:02,503
Arrest this man.
953
01:10:02,504 --> 01:10:04,451
No, don't!
954
01:10:04,452 --> 01:10:06,364
They speak English.
955
01:10:06,365 --> 01:10:09,789
So what?
They should speak Chinese.
956
01:10:09,790 --> 01:10:15,211
What am I doing here if they can
speak English as well as what we can?
957
01:10:15,212 --> 01:10:16,504
Arrest this man.
958
01:10:16,505 --> 01:10:18,835
I'm working, I'm a linguist.
959
01:10:18,836 --> 01:10:21,129
That's a new name for it.
960
01:10:21,130 --> 01:10:22,463
How dare you!
961
01:10:22,464 --> 01:10:23,511
Shut up!
962
01:10:23,512 --> 01:10:27,009
Aw! They're handling a genius.
963
01:10:27,010 --> 01:10:35,352
I protest! Ah! Ah! Ah! Aw! Ah!
964
01:10:38,777 --> 01:10:41,315
You're Martin Paul, the actor.
965
01:10:41,316 --> 01:10:43,364
That's right.
966
01:10:43,365 --> 01:10:46,696
I thought this wasn't
a beauty salon.
967
01:10:46,697 --> 01:10:51,039
Pardon? Oh, won't you
please come in?
968
01:10:51,040 --> 01:10:55,037
I'm demonstrating
a new beauty treatment.
969
01:10:55,038 --> 01:10:56,914
A very pretty mistake too.
970
01:10:56,915 --> 01:11:01,294
Mr Paul, please.
You can help me dress and undress.
971
01:11:01,295 --> 01:11:03,551
Mr Paul, really!
972
01:11:03,552 --> 01:11:05,178
I like Helping Hands.
973
01:11:05,179 --> 01:11:06,862
Not helping yourself hands!
974
01:11:06,863 --> 01:11:08,473
But you don't understand.
975
01:11:08,474 --> 01:11:09,740
Will you please control yourself?
976
01:11:09,741 --> 01:11:11,812
My fifth marriage has just ended.
977
01:11:11,813 --> 01:11:13,811
What's that got to do with it?
978
01:11:13,812 --> 01:11:18,019
Console me, have pity on me
in my hour of need.
979
01:11:18,020 --> 01:11:20,938
Who knows, you may
well be number six!
980
01:11:20,939 --> 01:11:29,281
Waaa! Not on your nelly! I'm off.
981
01:11:32,164 --> 01:11:40,506
Pity.
982
01:11:42,925 --> 01:11:46,297
Morning, sir.
Is the rehearsal being held here?
983
01:11:46,298 --> 01:11:48,591
It's a demonstration.
984
01:11:48,592 --> 01:11:50,319
Where's Mr Paul?
985
01:11:50,320 --> 01:11:51,975
Who's Mr Paul?
986
01:11:51,976 --> 01:11:54,143
There's been a mistake.
987
01:11:54,144 --> 01:11:57,749
I've assembled the
beauty trade to watch a
988
01:11:57,750 --> 01:12:01,354
lovely girl undergoing
our latest routine.
989
01:12:01,355 --> 01:12:04,690
Have I got a girl? No!
990
01:12:04,691 --> 01:12:06,615
Steady on.
991
01:12:11,830 --> 01:12:13,539
I've got you and I don't want you.
992
01:12:17,042 --> 01:12:20,879
Hello. Togetherness Marriage Agency?
993
01:12:20,880 --> 01:12:27,093
It's three minutes after the time
she's supposed to have arrived.
994
01:12:27,094 --> 01:12:30,134
I'm on the verge of a most important
995
01:12:30,135 --> 01:12:33,933
meeting and you can't
get her here on time.
996
01:12:33,934 --> 01:12:36,393
I am extremely dissatisfied.
997
01:12:36,394 --> 01:12:42,276
The next time I want a wife I
shall take my custom elsewhere.
998
01:12:45,779 --> 01:12:54,121
She's here.
999
01:12:56,165 --> 01:12:58,223
Mr Beamish?
1000
01:12:58,224 --> 01:13:01,169
Oh, yes.
1001
01:13:01,170 --> 01:13:06,090
I know everything's
going to be all right.
1002
01:13:06,091 --> 01:13:08,838
There's no reason
why it shouldn't be.
1003
01:13:08,839 --> 01:13:12,425
How exquisite, how exciting.
1004
01:13:12,426 --> 01:13:14,716
May I come in?
1005
01:13:14,717 --> 01:13:22,315
Oh, please do.
1006
01:13:22,316 --> 01:13:24,776
How thoughtful to bring flowers.
1007
01:13:24,777 --> 01:13:26,665
That's what you wanted -
1008
01:13:26,666 --> 01:13:30,365
a woman's touch in
your home. Do sit down.
1009
01:13:30,366 --> 01:13:35,995
I can't sit down, there's so much to
do. Where do you want me to start?
1010
01:13:35,996 --> 01:13:40,416
I'll leave that to you.
1011
01:13:40,417 --> 01:13:46,839
That doesn't look very comfortable.
1012
01:13:46,841 --> 01:13:50,051
Comfortable enough for anybody now.
1013
01:13:50,052 --> 01:13:55,431
Yes. Isn't it wonderful,
we're the same religion.
1014
01:13:55,537 --> 01:13:56,724
Eh?
1015
01:13:56,725 --> 01:14:00,765
Isn't it good the agency
takes care of such things?
1016
01:14:00,766 --> 01:14:02,263
Do they?
1017
01:14:02,264 --> 01:14:04,440
Definitely.
1018
01:14:04,441 --> 01:14:06,968
Your beliefs don't concern me.
1019
01:14:06,969 --> 01:14:12,443
The important thing is to get
on with the job and enjoy it.
1020
01:14:12,444 --> 01:14:13,950
But don't you want to talk?
1021
01:14:13,951 --> 01:14:19,700
Talk? We both know what I'm here
to do. What's there to talk about?
1022
01:14:19,701 --> 01:14:21,953
You sound more experienced
than I imagined.
1023
01:14:21,954 --> 01:14:24,372
I've had plenty of variety.
1024
01:14:24,373 --> 01:14:27,542
Variety?
That's why I joined.
1025
01:14:27,543 --> 01:14:28,548
Of course.
1026
01:14:28,549 --> 01:14:33,005
I don't mind. You must
take the rough with the smooth.
1027
01:14:33,006 --> 01:14:34,483
What are you doing?
1028
01:14:34,484 --> 01:14:35,889
Stripping for action.
1029
01:14:35,890 --> 01:14:40,888
I like to be comfy.
You don't have to do anything.
1030
01:14:40,889 --> 01:14:41,978
I think you ought to go.
1031
01:14:41,979 --> 01:14:45,351
But I haven't done anything yet.
1032
01:14:45,352 --> 01:14:47,767
And I don't want you to.
1033
01:14:47,768 --> 01:14:50,111
There's been a mistake.
1034
01:14:50,112 --> 01:14:52,817
You specifically asked for flowers.
1035
01:14:52,818 --> 01:14:54,819
I've got the letter here.
1036
01:14:54,820 --> 01:14:56,296
Show me.
1037
01:14:56,297 --> 01:15:04,639
Show me.
1038
01:15:06,086 --> 01:15:08,645
Helping Hands.
1039
01:15:08,646 --> 01:15:12,467
Marriage agency?
1040
01:15:12,468 --> 01:15:19,135
I thought you wanted someone to tidy
the place, a woman's touch for...
1041
01:15:19,136 --> 01:15:24,187
A tea party for my aunt
in two weeks' time.
1042
01:15:24,188 --> 01:15:28,066
Here we are. Aren't they lambs?
1043
01:15:28,067 --> 01:15:31,069
They look like birds to me.
1044
01:15:31,070 --> 01:15:34,129
Where's the show, then?
1045
01:15:34,130 --> 01:15:37,116
Olympia, next year.
1046
01:15:37,117 --> 01:15:41,240
No, I mean your show.
That must be a corker.
1047
01:15:41,241 --> 01:15:46,000
Must it?
You're crafty. You're dead crafty.
1048
01:15:46,001 --> 01:15:50,713
It looks like an ordinary house.
Where do you keep them?
1049
01:15:50,714 --> 01:15:52,989
Keep what?
You know.
1050
01:15:52,990 --> 01:15:54,300
But I don't.
1051
01:15:54,301 --> 01:15:58,304
You can rely on discretion with us.
1052
01:15:58,305 --> 01:16:01,636
If you want me to do the job,
I must know where they are.
1053
01:16:01,637 --> 01:16:08,147
But they're here. Can you not see?
1054
01:16:08,148 --> 01:16:11,401
Where?
What do you mean?
1055
01:16:11,402 --> 01:16:13,835
Where do the girls undress?!
1056
01:16:13,836 --> 01:16:15,720
There are no girls here.
1057
01:16:15,721 --> 01:16:17,532
Who does undress here, then?
1058
01:16:17,533 --> 01:16:21,202
Only the old woman
when she goes to bed.
1059
01:16:21,203 --> 01:16:22,370
Put his head in a bucket.
1060
01:16:22,371 --> 01:16:24,534
You do and I'll bite your thumb off.
1061
01:16:24,535 --> 01:16:26,207
Get out of it.
1062
01:16:26,208 --> 01:16:29,002
You are from Helping Hands?
1063
01:16:29,003 --> 01:16:31,791
Of course, I'm your chucker-out.
1064
01:16:31,792 --> 01:16:35,133
There's been a mistake.
1065
01:16:35,134 --> 01:16:43,475
# SLOW JAZZ
1066
01:16:46,061 --> 01:16:47,645
Oh, hello.
1067
01:16:47,646 --> 01:16:49,188
What do you want?
1068
01:16:49,190 --> 01:16:52,270
Your birds. What sort are they?
1069
01:16:52,271 --> 01:16:53,484
What sort do you like?
1070
01:16:53,485 --> 01:16:56,357
Blue tits. Have you got any?
1071
01:16:56,358 --> 01:16:59,193
No, we've got central heating.
1072
01:16:59,194 --> 01:17:01,284
Oh, tropical birds.
1073
01:17:01,285 --> 01:17:03,202
We have one from Ceylon.
1074
01:17:03,204 --> 01:17:08,166
Oh, my goodness, how do I keep
the poor things warm in a taxi?
1075
01:17:08,167 --> 01:17:14,589
Look, chum, this is a respectable
place, you could bring your aunt.
1076
01:17:14,590 --> 01:17:17,217
Oh, thank you.
1077
01:17:17,218 --> 01:17:19,422
You're not from Helping Hands?
1078
01:17:19,423 --> 01:17:20,887
Yes.
1079
01:17:20,888 --> 01:17:22,513
You made a mistake.
1080
01:17:22,515 --> 01:17:25,016
I can't, we've got a system.
1081
01:17:25,017 --> 01:17:31,397
I asked for a chucker-out.
We've had trouble with gatecrashers.
1082
01:17:31,398 --> 01:17:33,686
I wanted somebody tough
to turf them out.
1083
01:17:33,687 --> 01:17:35,021
And you got me.
1084
01:17:35,022 --> 01:17:36,611
Yeah.
1085
01:17:36,612 --> 01:17:41,861
Yes. A job's a job, orders
are orders. When do I start?
1086
01:17:41,862 --> 01:17:45,286
You mean you'll take the job?
1087
01:17:45,287 --> 01:17:46,287
Yes, please.
1088
01:17:46,288 --> 01:17:49,494
Well, bully for you.
1089
01:17:49,495 --> 01:17:53,956
Thanks.
1090
01:17:53,957 --> 01:17:55,880
Oh, I say!
1091
01:17:55,881 --> 01:18:03,888
I couldn't bring my aunty here.
1092
01:18:03,889 --> 01:18:05,139
Thank you.
1093
01:18:05,140 --> 01:18:08,017
You're welcome.
1094
01:18:08,018 --> 01:18:10,103
Gee up, gee up, gee up!
1095
01:18:10,104 --> 01:18:18,445
You need a punch up the beak.
1096
01:18:19,613 --> 01:18:21,739
How do you do?
1097
01:18:21,740 --> 01:18:27,365
I was thinking early busy, wondering
if you're ready for the frail.
1098
01:18:27,366 --> 01:18:33,121
Sir, perhaps I'll understand you
if you talk slowly.
1099
01:18:33,122 --> 01:18:35,920
Do me a favour - slowly.
1100
01:18:35,921 --> 01:18:44,263
For many crowthers, I have omster
investor moerd craymen foil.
1101
01:18:44,388 --> 01:18:47,051
I just don't understand him.
1102
01:18:47,052 --> 01:18:48,821
I do.
1103
01:18:48,822 --> 01:18:50,518
You do?
1104
01:18:50,519 --> 01:18:53,062
He gobbledegooks.
1105
01:18:53,063 --> 01:18:54,746
I don't care what he is.
1106
01:18:54,747 --> 01:18:56,735
You don't understand.
1107
01:18:56,736 --> 01:18:58,688
I know. Translate it.
1108
01:18:58,689 --> 01:18:59,736
How do you do?
1109
01:18:59,737 --> 01:19:02,358
How do you do?
Minda plow interpri?
1110
01:19:02,359 --> 01:19:04,908
Well, how extraordin necessar tooly.
1111
01:19:04,909 --> 01:19:09,913
You can strowl and tell
Mr hayden there was goeden.
1112
01:19:09,914 --> 01:19:14,579
Prepare yourself for a shock.
This is your landlord...
1113
01:19:14,580 --> 01:19:16,961
..and he's just given you notice.
1114
01:19:16,962 --> 01:19:21,753
Because I don't talk
his language? Racial prejudice.
1115
01:19:21,754 --> 01:19:25,720
No prejudice. Kalaba boawal.
1116
01:19:25,721 --> 01:19:30,433
Each man's
investment bowl futures.
1117
01:19:30,434 --> 01:19:34,103
And therefore us all upsars.
1118
01:19:34,104 --> 01:19:37,351
He's just received a much
better offer for these premises.
1119
01:19:37,352 --> 01:19:39,484
That's nice!
1120
01:19:39,485 --> 01:19:42,273
Just as we were settling in
so comfortably.
1121
01:19:42,274 --> 01:19:45,377
I don't realise the problem sown.
1122
01:19:45,378 --> 01:19:48,993
Get the message home for weeks.
1123
01:19:48,994 --> 01:19:53,284
He's been trying to tell you
for weeks about it...
1124
01:19:53,285 --> 01:19:55,833
..to soften the blow.
1125
01:19:55,835 --> 01:19:59,290
I'm sure we'd all chip in
to cover the increase.
1126
01:19:59,291 --> 01:20:02,006
Yeah.
1127
01:20:02,007 --> 01:20:04,842
No, we'll find new premises.
1128
01:20:04,844 --> 01:20:08,925
It took you three months to
find this place and it's no palace.
1129
01:20:08,926 --> 01:20:10,840
That's the end of Helping Hands.
1130
01:20:10,841 --> 01:20:12,487
Back to the labour exchange.
1131
01:20:12,488 --> 01:20:14,373
There must be some way out.
1132
01:20:14,374 --> 01:20:16,187
Yeah, that door, we're sunk.
1133
01:20:16,188 --> 01:20:18,684
Surely there's something we can do.
1134
01:20:18,685 --> 01:20:21,067
We must be sensible.
1135
01:20:21,068 --> 01:20:24,070
In his shoes, I'd do the same.
1136
01:20:24,071 --> 01:20:26,129
In his shoes, I'd run for me life.
1137
01:20:26,130 --> 01:20:28,910
It's not gonna solve our problem.
1138
01:20:28,911 --> 01:20:31,740
All conscience and shedy tear.
1139
01:20:31,741 --> 01:20:34,497
But I found a wet sea and water...
1140
01:20:34,498 --> 01:20:41,671
..but I say you can all stay remain
if you suffer generarops.
1141
01:20:41,672 --> 01:20:45,628
He's moved by our loyalty
to this enterprise...
1142
01:20:45,629 --> 01:20:49,804
..and we can stay.
1143
01:20:49,805 --> 01:20:52,765
Oh, that's nice. Thank you.
1144
01:20:52,766 --> 01:20:55,930
If we will do something for him.
1145
01:20:55,931 --> 01:20:58,097
What? I'll do anything.
1146
01:20:58,098 --> 01:21:00,356
I'll do anything.
1147
01:21:00,357 --> 01:21:06,524
I have in this enviros beautiful
lawns a great bildis biroque...
1148
01:21:06,525 --> 01:21:12,655
..and a gargol in front entrals,
windy staircase up to the ceily...
1149
01:21:12,656 --> 01:21:18,887
..and shandy ladies, fine centra
grives with Van Goghy...
1150
01:21:18,888 --> 01:21:25,084
..and if anyone come works
themselves to stickabick...
1151
01:21:25,085 --> 01:21:31,304
..this leasy is handy-ho, garba.
1152
01:21:31,305 --> 01:21:37,769
His main business
is property development.
1153
01:21:37,770 --> 01:21:42,106
He's bought the oldest,
dirtiest house he's ever had...
1154
01:21:42,107 --> 01:21:45,316
..and the cleaning
bill is prohibitive.
1155
01:21:45,317 --> 01:21:50,449
If we all clean it for him,
he'll give us a 99-years lease.
1156
01:21:53,160 --> 01:21:54,906
Why not make it the round 100?
1157
01:21:54,907 --> 01:21:55,912
You shuppy caky.
1158
01:21:55,913 --> 01:22:04,255
You shut your cakehole.
1159
01:22:13,472 --> 01:22:17,470
It'll take 99 years
to clear up this dump.
1160
01:22:17,471 --> 01:22:20,103
Yeah, well, step by step.
1161
01:22:20,104 --> 01:22:22,814
OK, boss, where do we start?
1162
01:22:22,815 --> 01:22:26,333
To make it easier to walk about,
the floor first.
1163
01:22:26,334 --> 01:22:29,779
It's better to start
at the top of the house.
1164
01:22:29,780 --> 01:22:34,320
Disturbed dust will fall down and
muck up what we've already cleaned.
1165
01:22:34,321 --> 01:22:38,783
May I submit for the sake
of efficient team working...
1166
01:22:38,784 --> 01:22:41,416
..that we all belt up.
1167
01:22:41,417 --> 01:22:43,543
Always the gent.
1168
01:22:43,544 --> 01:22:48,089
Let's put ourselves
in the hands of Sir Handy.
1169
01:22:48,090 --> 01:22:53,548
I like it noted I suggested
the suggestion I suggested.
1170
01:22:53,549 --> 01:22:55,550
Very suggestive it was too.
1171
01:22:55,551 --> 01:22:57,632
Over here, please.
1172
01:22:57,633 --> 01:23:00,509
Who's the scrubber?
1173
01:23:00,510 --> 01:23:06,524
In a straight line.
1174
01:23:06,525 --> 01:23:10,486
Get in a straight line. Come on.
1175
01:23:10,487 --> 01:23:13,948
Right now, you ready. Quick sweep!
1176
01:23:13,949 --> 01:23:17,952
One, two, one, two, one, two...
1177
01:23:17,953 --> 01:23:21,456
CHOKING
1178
01:23:21,457 --> 01:23:29,798
I'll get some water.
1179
01:23:32,218 --> 01:23:40,559
Here, there's no water, we'll have
to turn on... the... the main.
1180
01:23:40,935 --> 01:23:43,603
The water mains.
1181
01:23:43,604 --> 01:23:47,649
Wonder where they are.
1182
01:23:47,650 --> 01:23:53,112
It's usually in the cellar.
1183
01:23:53,113 --> 01:23:58,738
I'll nip down and look. If I find it
I'll shout, you turn the tap on.
1184
01:23:58,739 --> 01:23:59,786
THUD
1185
01:23:59,787 --> 01:24:02,038
Mr Handy!
1186
01:24:02,039 --> 01:24:04,707
Turn the flaming light on!
1187
01:24:04,708 --> 01:24:08,289
Oh, yes, but I'm not sure
where they put the...
1188
01:24:08,290 --> 01:24:10,213
Argh!
1189
01:24:10,214 --> 01:24:12,835
Don't go, there's so few left.
1190
01:24:12,836 --> 01:24:15,385
Where's the flaming light?!
1191
01:24:15,386 --> 01:24:18,596
The electricity
doesn't seem to be connected.
1192
01:24:18,597 --> 01:24:22,345
Someone might have told you
the stairs begin immediately.
1193
01:24:22,346 --> 01:24:23,805
Well, they didn't, did they?!
1194
01:24:23,806 --> 01:24:26,479
No, they didn't! Ohhh!
1195
01:24:26,480 --> 01:24:29,352
Can you find the water main
in the dark?
1196
01:24:29,353 --> 01:24:31,484
I'll try.
1197
01:24:31,485 --> 01:24:36,281
Oh, blimey! I found it
wiht my blasted shin!
1198
01:24:36,282 --> 01:24:39,284
Help, don't just stand there!
1199
01:24:39,285 --> 01:24:45,164
I say, how did you know
where I was standing? Ooooh!
1200
01:24:45,165 --> 01:24:48,121
I've just remembered,
I left the tap turned on.
1201
01:24:48,122 --> 01:24:49,789
We got it! Yeah!
1202
01:24:49,790 --> 01:24:58,132
Hurray!
1203
01:25:05,269 --> 01:25:07,369
Women and children first!
1204
01:25:07,370 --> 01:25:15,712
Thank you, Mother, come on!
1205
01:25:25,998 --> 01:25:34,340
Francis, where are you?
Where have you gone?
1206
01:25:45,267 --> 01:25:47,185
Turn it off!
1207
01:25:47,186 --> 01:25:55,318
I've just turned it on.
1208
01:25:55,319 --> 01:25:57,445
Turn it off!
1209
01:25:57,446 --> 01:26:00,949
Turn off the main!
1210
01:26:00,950 --> 01:26:06,829
Get down there and turn off the main!
1211
01:26:06,830 --> 01:26:14,587
Break it down!
1212
01:26:14,588 --> 01:26:18,216
Go on!
1213
01:26:18,217 --> 01:26:20,760
Are you all right?!
1214
01:26:20,761 --> 01:26:23,846
Of course he is. He's done it before
1215
01:26:23,848 --> 01:26:31,020
Fancy charging
a rotting old door like that.
1216
01:26:31,021 --> 01:26:34,602
Any idiot can tell if a door's
solid.
1217
01:26:34,603 --> 01:26:37,860
Test it. Simple.
1218
01:26:37,862 --> 01:26:43,825
Argh!
1219
01:26:43,826 --> 01:26:46,119
Hey, Dave!
1220
01:26:46,120 --> 01:26:51,124
Hello. I'm all right,
and I've turned off the main.
1221
01:26:51,125 --> 01:26:53,210
The water will die down in a moment.
1222
01:26:59,508 --> 01:27:02,427
There's a big hole.
1223
01:27:02,428 --> 01:27:06,347
I did suggest we started upstairs.
1224
01:27:06,348 --> 01:27:08,010
Look at all the mess.
1225
01:27:08,011 --> 01:27:09,225
I'm looking.
1226
01:27:09,226 --> 01:27:13,397
This is the end of Helping Hands.
1227
01:27:23,824 --> 01:27:28,202
What a remarkable
organisation set to sure.
1228
01:27:28,204 --> 01:27:33,453
Who would you know I'd decide
to demolish all this propy...
1229
01:27:33,454 --> 01:27:37,331
..and to build
a luxury modern flabablock?
1230
01:27:37,332 --> 01:27:38,875
You can say that again.
1231
01:27:38,876 --> 01:27:40,042
Flabablock.
1232
01:27:40,044 --> 01:27:41,806
Cor! Remarkabold.
1233
01:27:41,807 --> 01:27:46,972
An extraordinary pace of progress in
such a short tie load. Folly, folly.
1234
01:27:50,601 --> 01:27:53,389
Only one thing to sum up it.
1235
01:27:53,390 --> 01:27:55,242
What's that?
1236
01:27:55,243 --> 01:27:58,524
Carry-okus.
1237
01:27:58,526 --> 01:28:01,361
Goodly-bye load.
1238
01:28:01,362 --> 01:28:07,195
"What an organisation you are. How
could you know I'd change my mind...
1239
01:28:07,196 --> 01:28:12,784
..and pull the house down - the
greenhouse and wash house and..."
1240
01:28:12,785 --> 01:28:16,084
That fell down of its own accord.
1241
01:28:16,085 --> 01:28:19,603
He's going to build
a luxury block of flats.
1242
01:28:19,604 --> 01:28:23,086
Only one thing remains to be said -
carry on!
1243
01:28:23,087 --> 01:28:25,427
Regardless!
88291
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