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1
00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:12,919
Happy birthday.
2
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,195
Oh, my God!
3
00:00:15,280 --> 00:00:18,590
Cameron is Vince's boyfriend.
Says he shags like a rabbit.
4
00:00:18,680 --> 00:00:21,148
He's bought him a car! He's perfect.
5
00:00:21,240 --> 00:00:23,879
ls that the girl from work?
6
00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:26,713
You're a dirty little poof.
7
00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:29,314
Christ, mate, you're such a bastard.
8
00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:31,595
That's it. We're going.
9
00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:34,717
& Celebrate good times, come on! &
10
00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:40,470
That's a big push you gave him. Keys are
on the table. He doesn't want them back.
11
00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:42,516
Bastard!
12
00:00:44,360 --> 00:00:45,713
Get inside.
13
00:00:45,800 --> 00:00:48,633
The moment she marries him,
your child will have a new father.
14
00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:50,438
The lesbian letters.
15
00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:53,751
They'll make the Home Office
see things in a very different light.
16
00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:56,195
l send them, she's gonna hate me.
17
00:00:57,120 --> 00:00:59,998
l could do it.
The letters, l could send them.
18
00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:32,549
Do you think l look lesbian?
19
00:01:33,640 --> 00:01:37,792
The Home Office always deals with
fake weddings. Maybe they can tell.
20
00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:42,112
- What time are they coming?
- Half three. Lance is climbing the wall.
21
00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:44,589
lt's probably just routine.
22
00:01:44,680 --> 00:01:47,638
- Yeah.
- Anyway, thanks for the lift.
23
00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:51,757
Now, you look after your mother,
big fella.
24
00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:02,876
See ya.
25
00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:11,635
You might want to check out the Sahara.
lt's more robust.
26
00:02:11,720 --> 00:02:13,756
l'm thinking family man.
27
00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:16,274
- l like this one.
- Just think Sahara.
28
00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:18,999
lt's more expensive but the Sport,
29
00:02:19,080 --> 00:02:21,435
you get a lot of gay guys
buying this one.
30
00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:26,150
OK, they're cutting edge. But a man
like yourself, l'm thinking image.
31
00:02:27,240 --> 00:02:30,357
- l like this one.
- Those lads - money to burn.
32
00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:33,079
Then they die young
so we get the resale value.
33
00:02:33,160 --> 00:02:36,311
Take it for a spin
and sign this when you get back.
34
00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:43,595
(Engine revving)
35
00:02:59,240 --> 00:03:00,593
Where do l sign?
36
00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:04,430
l'm back. Have you missed me?
37
00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:06,750
- How was Scotland?
- Scottish.
38
00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:10,469
So, er, what's the news, Mr Tyler, sir?
39
00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:12,994
Refrigeration's gonna close.
Ten jobs gone.
40
00:03:13,080 --> 00:03:15,674
Not shop news, l don't want shop news.
41
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:18,228
l want news.
42
00:03:18,320 --> 00:03:20,675
Jill, Rosalie...
43
00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:24,150
- Steady the buffers, she's back!
- Hiya! How you doin'?
44
00:03:26,040 --> 00:03:28,395
(Rosalie) No.
(Marcie) You must have.
45
00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:32,917
(Rosalie) He did, cos l was watching.
lt was revolting!
46
00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:35,753
- Vince?!
- (Laughter)
47
00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:43,754
Wilfred Owen was shot dead
on the 4th of November, 1918,
48
00:03:43,840 --> 00:03:46,195
just seven days before the armistice.
49
00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:50,239
Thing is, sir, he was queer, Wilfred Owen.
Says so in the front.
50
00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:53,915
You can't teach us about poofs.
You're not allowed.
51
00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:57,276
Thank you, it's got nothing to do
with his poetry.
52
00:03:57,360 --> 00:04:01,751
Though no doubt he found lots to do
in the trenches other than fight.
53
00:04:01,840 --> 00:04:05,674
Sir, they all said, ''Here comes Owen!
Backs to the wall!''
54
00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:09,799
Thank you, Christian. Now, if you could
look at the preface of 1918 -
55
00:04:09,880 --> 00:04:15,512
''My subject is war, the pity of war,
the poetry is in the pity.''
56
00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:18,672
Cos l can leave.
As soon as l'm 16, l'm leaving.
57
00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:22,116
lf me and Dazz get that flat,
l'll get a job in the Village.
58
00:04:22,200 --> 00:04:25,590
l'll get bar work.
They never ask your age, Dazz said.
59
00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:29,958
He left school, he told them to stuff it.
You can report teachers for that.
60
00:04:30,040 --> 00:04:32,190
Have a good look, then!
61
00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:36,234
- What was that about?
- Nothing.
62
00:04:37,320 --> 00:04:40,437
- Was he looking at me?
- lt's not always you.
63
00:04:42,720 --> 00:04:45,553
Did l tell you? Gary's moved in.
64
00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:47,596
Mum asked him last week.
65
00:04:47,680 --> 00:04:49,636
Moved in weekend.
66
00:04:51,920 --> 00:04:53,273
Like you care.
67
00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:56,477
lt's all Nathan and Dazz.
Dazz and the flat and the Village.
68
00:04:56,560 --> 00:05:00,633
Me, l could be bleeding from the eyes.
69
00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:04,596
Sorry.
70
00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:06,636
So, how's it going?
71
00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:09,393
Me mum's happy.
You should hear 'em at night.
72
00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:15,830
He keeps walking out
the bathroom naked.
73
00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:19,674
- (Phone)
- Drove it straight through the window!
74
00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:21,716
They've been shouting all sorts.
75
00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:25,270
''We're suing for damages.
Put me through to Mr Burton.''
76
00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:28,033
- What did Burton say?
- He said, ''Fuck them.''
77
00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:33,592
He did. He said, ''We'll counter sue and
we'll tell the papers what your man said.
78
00:05:33,680 --> 00:05:36,513
''You're up against a PR company now.''
79
00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:38,636
Lisa Levine, says it's urgent.
80
00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:42,315
- What's happening?
- They arrived early, just walked in.
81
00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:46,678
No smiles, no tea, straight down
to business. lt's looking good.
82
00:05:46,760 --> 00:05:51,595
Hang on, l'll get you on the mobile.
Sandra, cancel everything this afternoon.
83
00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:55,116
- l'm going out.
- Where? Ram raiding?
84
00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:57,316
Hey, get me a stereo.
85
00:05:58,400 --> 00:06:00,197
So, what have they said?
86
00:06:00,280 --> 00:06:04,910
lt's confidential. They asked me to leave.
Lance said l'm the baby-sitter.
87
00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:06,956
Hold on.
88
00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:12,430
So have they got the letters?
89
00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:16,991
- They've got something... Oh, yes.
- 'What's happening?'
90
00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:19,310
What the fuck's happening? Lisa!
91
00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:21,709
That's it. Come on, Lance.
92
00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:25,429
'Jesus Christ, you stupid dyke,
tell me what's happening!'
93
00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:27,909
(Gasps) Fantastic!
94
00:06:29,280 --> 00:06:31,430
Lisa? Lisa!
95
00:06:41,920 --> 00:06:45,629
(Romey) He's gone through
all the official channels.
96
00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:47,676
Was it you?
97
00:06:47,760 --> 00:06:50,752
- Was it you?
- What? l got this for Alfred.
98
00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:55,356
- Someone told them, Stuart, was it you?
- Told them what?
99
00:06:55,440 --> 00:06:58,273
- lt's a mistake...
- (Lisa) Quite a temper, our Lance.
100
00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:02,353
Punched the man from the Home Office,
then punched the arresting officer.
101
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:08,072
l think his visa application
is officially null and void.
102
00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:12,551
- Lisa, go with him. He'll need a solicitor.
- l can't, l'm involved.
103
00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:15,950
- He needs you!
- l'll phone the office.
104
00:07:16,040 --> 00:07:20,955
Of course it was you! You never liked
him, never wanted him in that house.
105
00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:25,830
- l don't know what you're talking about.
- They knew the wedding was a fake.
106
00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:28,309
They had my things from the house.
107
00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:33,758
Mr Jordan, who told you?
Who gave you the letters?
108
00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:39,358
l'm not allowed to say - but if you see
Nathan Maloney, tell him thanks a bunch.
109
00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:41,556
Nathan?
110
00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:45,436
(Mobile phone)
111
00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:49,196
Hello?
112
00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:57,995
lt was your tie.
113
00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:03,919
There was a man on Changing Rooms
last night wearing the same tie.
114
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,719
We were laughing at your tie.
115
00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:11,269
l haven't said anything,
in case you're wondering.
116
00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:14,113
But if you're ashamed,
then it's up to you.
117
00:08:14,200 --> 00:08:17,351
- l'm not ashamed.
- You're not exactly proud, Vince.
118
00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:23,231
Carter sent this.
He wants it back Monday.
119
00:08:23,320 --> 00:08:25,390
Yeah. Thanks.
120
00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:31,880
lt's not that bad. Your tie.
121
00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:36,156
Yeah. lt didn't cost much.
122
00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:38,196
Bargain. l got it from...
123
00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:49,594
Hazel! We've got lesbians.
124
00:08:52,160 --> 00:08:54,594
And l'm out of herbal tea.
125
00:08:54,680 --> 00:08:56,318
Nathan!
126
00:08:56,400 --> 00:08:59,631
You treat that baby like a toy,
like you don't care.
127
00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:02,553
And Lance? Lance'd take over.
128
00:09:02,640 --> 00:09:05,438
He'd be dad and you'd say nothing.
129
00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:07,590
But l know what you're like.
130
00:09:07,680 --> 00:09:11,719
You love him and you'd never say,
so l said it for you.
131
00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:14,758
- Lance is going to be deported.
- l don't care!
132
00:09:14,840 --> 00:09:16,512
Jesus Christ.
133
00:09:16,600 --> 00:09:20,912
l don't give a toss about Lance.
Look at all l've done - left my family,
134
00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:25,152
- left Donna, just for you.
- Keeps going back to you, Stuart.
135
00:09:25,240 --> 00:09:29,916
- How was l to know?
- lt's all your fault cos you just shag!
136
00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:33,117
You keep going every night
and you never look back.
137
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:36,031
Look at what you've done, look at him.
138
00:09:36,120 --> 00:09:40,432
l didn't know, Romey.
lf l'd known, l'd have...
139
00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:43,272
l don't know.
140
00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:45,476
And l chose you as the father.
141
00:09:47,840 --> 00:09:50,912
You chose Lance as the husband
and look at him.
142
00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:53,116
Slightest trouble, out with the fists.
143
00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:57,034
Do you want a man like that
living with your kid?
144
00:09:57,120 --> 00:09:59,076
Maybe not.
145
00:10:04,800 --> 00:10:09,112
- You all right, then, stranger?
- Yeah. Thanks for that.
146
00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:11,156
l just...
147
00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:14,316
l dunno.
148
00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:16,550
Keep waiting for the punch line.
149
00:10:19,640 --> 00:10:22,279
No, l'm not complaining.
150
00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:25,113
l like art. l'm good at art.
151
00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:28,556
Those pictures of dogs playing poker,
l love 'em.
152
00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:31,393
Magic Eye pictures, fantastic.
153
00:10:31,480 --> 00:10:33,948
l saw one once, it was a duck.
154
00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:37,554
You looked for long enough
and there was a duck.
155
00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:39,790
Brilliant. Worth millions.
156
00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:42,440
l've just got to stay for the speech.
157
00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:46,115
No, fine. Me and art, we're like that.
158
00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:49,636
Art Garfunkel.
Bright Eyes, burning like fire.
159
00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:55,350
Now, there's a film.
Apparently, those rabbits weren't real.
160
00:10:55,440 --> 00:10:56,873
Fooled me.
161
00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:04,115
- All right, let's go.
- Don't be daft.
162
00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,390
l can be in the same room.
163
00:11:14,720 --> 00:11:16,756
Stuart.
164
00:11:23,840 --> 00:11:25,876
We could go to Canal Street.
165
00:11:25,960 --> 00:11:28,758
- What, and then go back to yours?
- Sure.
166
00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:32,116
- Mariner's Court, yeah?
- Mm.
167
00:11:32,200 --> 00:11:35,192
l've been there.
Must have made a big impression.
168
00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:37,589
Oh, right!
169
00:11:37,680 --> 00:11:40,035
Right, yeah. Course you have, yeah.
170
00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:43,276
Nice to see you again.
171
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:48,070
Listen, what? Do you wanna go?
Do you wanna, er...
172
00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:50,435
- Let's go and have a drink.
- Forget it.
173
00:11:51,640 --> 00:11:55,030
- Let's go back to mine.
- Just fuck off, OK?
174
00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:58,196
Come on, l bet l was good.
175
00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:02,034
l said fuck off. Now, what part of that
don't you understand?
176
00:12:19,080 --> 00:12:21,036
Pathetic.
177
00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:54,231
Let's get a cab.
178
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:58,235
(Vince) He's all bloody image.
179
00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:02,916
We were in Babylon once, off our heads,
Alexander's going mental.
180
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:06,436
So we ended up dancing on a podium,
you know, like twats.
181
00:13:06,520 --> 00:13:08,875
We looked stupid, so what?
182
00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:13,158
But Stuart, he just walks away
like we're dirt.
183
00:13:14,240 --> 00:13:18,870
- l got those brochures for Australia.
- Oh, right. Yeah, great.
184
00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:20,951
Expensive.
185
00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:24,476
- l'll pay.
- Yeah. Well, we'll see.
186
00:13:24,560 --> 00:13:29,236
And this bloke at Mardi Gras, right?
Stuart's been out all weekend,
187
00:13:29,320 --> 00:13:31,436
he's had ketamine and God knows what.
188
00:13:31,520 --> 00:13:34,318
He sees this bloke,
he says, ''l'm having him.''
189
00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:41,916
l love you.
190
00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:51,356
Right, do you want sex?
191
00:13:52,320 --> 00:13:54,993
l suppose l owe you a favour. Come on.
192
00:13:57,840 --> 00:13:59,671
l didn't do it for a shag.
193
00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:03,516
Nathan,
194
00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:05,556
it's all l've got to offer.
195
00:14:05,640 --> 00:14:08,438
How many men's had sex in here?
196
00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:12,789
Twenty-seven...million.
197
00:14:15,320 --> 00:14:17,276
l was just on tap.
198
00:14:17,360 --> 00:14:19,476
You don't even like me.
199
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:23,996
- You're not so bad.
- Really?
200
00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:28,710
Well, let's just say
you're not the twat l thought you were.
201
00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:31,030
ls that all?
202
00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:33,439
That's all.
203
00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:36,437
Yeah, well. One day.
204
00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:42,075
Oh, yeah.
205
00:14:43,320 --> 00:14:48,553
Ten years' time, l'll be pushing 40,
you'll be 25. Jesus!
206
00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:52,596
l can wait.
207
00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:57,916
l'm off.
208
00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,514
l've got school.
209
00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:04,874
Have a coffee.
210
00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:07,758
- What for?
- l don't know.
211
00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:11,355
What does anyone ever have coffee for?
lt's just coffee.
212
00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:13,670
l'd better go.
213
00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:17,593
- We could watch a video.
- Not porn.
214
00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:20,756
lt's not always porn.
215
00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:29,075
- Stay for a bit.
- Do you want me to?
216
00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:40,159
- Do you want me to stay?
- l don't mind.
217
00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:42,629
Do you really want me to stay?
218
00:15:44,680 --> 00:15:46,432
Yeah.
219
00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:50,791
Who'd have thought?
220
00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:53,633
Stuart Alan Jones, begging me to stay.
221
00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:58,679
lf you think that's begging, you'd better
never find yourself homeless.
222
00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:02,154
& But when the morning comes
223
00:16:02,240 --> 00:16:04,390
& Don't say you love me
224
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:07,438
& Don't say you need me
225
00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:09,795
& l really don't think that's fair
226
00:16:09,880 --> 00:16:12,872
& Boy, l'm not so dumb... &
227
00:16:39,880 --> 00:16:41,791
l'm gonna be late.
228
00:16:41,880 --> 00:16:44,997
Where's that folder, the blue folder?
229
00:16:45,080 --> 00:16:47,833
Shit. The traffic this time of day.
230
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:51,195
Right. l'm off.
231
00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:53,669
You all right? You've got the keys.
232
00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:56,911
Careful with the door,
it needs pulling. See you.
233
00:16:57,000 --> 00:17:01,039
- You don't have to say anything back.
- Yeah. God, l'm late.
234
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:04,874
The door needs pulling.
l've said that, haven't l? Bye!
235
00:17:20,520 --> 00:17:21,873
(Mobile phone)
236
00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:36,959
- What?
- Thought l'd better say thanks.
237
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:38,473
For K-9.
238
00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:43,396
l mean, he's great
239
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:47,519
and l know the circumstances
were a bit sort of...
240
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:51,309
'Well, he's great. Or it's great. Whatever.'
241
00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:54,233
He. l think Tom Baker says ''he''.
242
00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:58,153
So...thanks.
243
00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:00,674
Any time.
244
00:18:02,840 --> 00:18:04,796
Better go.
245
00:18:41,680 --> 00:18:43,989
(Rings)
246
00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:46,632
What are you doing for lunch?
247
00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:53,234
Rosalie won't say anything
but l've still got to look at her.
248
00:18:53,320 --> 00:18:56,392
l've got to spend every day
telling her what to do and...
249
00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:02,316
- How's Cameron?
- He's great, yeah.
250
00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:05,153
Wants me to go on holiday. Melbourne.
251
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:06,992
Sounds good.
252
00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:09,036
Poor sod. Give him six months,
253
00:19:09,120 --> 00:19:12,795
he'll be able to name
all the Doctor Whos in order.
254
00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:15,633
William Hartnell, Patrick Troughton,
Jon Pertwee, Tom Baker,
255
00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:17,915
Peter Davison, Colin Baker,
Sylvester McCoy.
256
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:19,353
What about Paul McGann?
257
00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:22,000
(Both) Paul McGann doesn't count.
258
00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:31,393
lt's all right, though.
Me and Cameron. lt's OK.
259
00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:34,790
lt's a bit of a love job, actually.
Says he loves me.
260
00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:39,833
How's things with you? How's Alfred?
261
00:19:46,760 --> 00:19:48,273
lt pisses me off, though.
262
00:19:48,360 --> 00:19:51,796
First one to say love,
he's in charge, puts him in charge.
263
00:19:52,880 --> 00:19:55,348
l don't know.
264
00:19:55,440 --> 00:19:57,556
lt's all a bit grown-up.
265
00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:02,515
You're supposed to ask if l love him.
266
00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:06,195
You can't. You can't even respect him.
267
00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:08,874
He loves Vince Tyler
so that makes him stupid.
268
00:20:10,520 --> 00:20:12,875
The moment he said it, it all just died.
269
00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:15,110
No. lt's nothing like that.
270
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:25,556
Me, though?
271
00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:28,916
l can't be the best shag he's ever had.
He's Australian.
272
00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:32,555
l don't even know if l'm a good kisser.
273
00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:35,074
How do you know
if you're a good kisser?
274
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:37,116
You just know.
275
00:20:38,560 --> 00:20:40,516
Fuck off.
276
00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:45,957
- lt's not as if l've ever done anything.
- You've done nothing.
277
00:20:46,040 --> 00:20:48,349
You go to work, you go for a drink,
278
00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:50,590
you watch cheap science fiction.
279
00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:55,674
Small and tiny world. What's impressive
about that? What is there to love?
280
00:20:57,520 --> 00:20:59,272
Yeah.
281
00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:04,269
lt was good enough for me.
282
00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:17,152
l'm late. l've gotta go.
283
00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:20,391
Tell him what you like.
You're in charge, not him.
284
00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:23,436
Tell him, er...
285
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:26,193
Tell him he's lucky. l'll see you around.
286
00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:29,078
- We could do this again.
- Do you think?
287
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:31,355
Just lunch. No harm in it.
288
00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:34,996
Nah.
289
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:37,833
Sorry, Vince, but my world is huge.
290
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:51,389
Do you think Hazel will let me stay?
291
00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:55,153
Not permanent, just tonight.
292
00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:59,028
Gary's got his mates round.
lt's like a bomb's hit Chester Zoo.
293
00:21:59,120 --> 00:22:02,271
Police cars, broken legs,
lesbians screaming,
294
00:22:02,360 --> 00:22:06,353
Lance shipped out the country -
your mother had a front-row seat!
295
00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:09,557
- You never said.
- l don't see you any more.
296
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:13,110
No, you're Mr Grown-Up now,
it's all dinner for two.
297
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:17,318
Don't worry about us, we're still here,
still having a laugh.
298
00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:21,951
Now, don't say that about Cameron,
l think he's lovely.
299
00:22:22,040 --> 00:22:24,315
That's not fair, he's a very nice man!
300
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:26,436
Hiya, l was just coming round.
301
00:22:26,520 --> 00:22:29,796
- You're on form!
- When am l not?
302
00:22:29,880 --> 00:22:31,836
There you go.
303
00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:35,117
Don't look. By the pillar,
it's Christian Hobbs.
304
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:37,555
- Who's he with?
- That's Cathy Mott.
305
00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:41,679
He's done all right.
She's top of the list, Year 12.
306
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:46,038
- What are they doing here, though?
- He's out to impress.
307
00:22:46,120 --> 00:22:49,795
Canal Street, it's New York to Year 12.
308
00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:52,440
Like he's so cool. Tosser!
309
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:56,268
(& Karaoke:
Should l Stay Or Should l Go? )
310
00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:01,512
l had to see Hazel, l owed her a tenner.
311
00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:03,591
l thought you'd go to ground.
312
00:23:03,680 --> 00:23:06,240
My fault. l always get a bit heavy.
313
00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:12,032
& And if l stay it will be double
314
00:23:13,160 --> 00:23:15,913
& So you gotta let me know... &
315
00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:21,348
He smiled at me!
The bastard smiled at me!
316
00:23:22,360 --> 00:23:25,716
- Do you want to go?
- What's the point of staying here?
317
00:23:29,880 --> 00:23:33,714
& And if l stay it will be double... &
318
00:23:33,800 --> 00:23:38,476
- Coming, then?
- What, like l've been driven out?
319
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:41,950
What's this place for, Donna?
What's it for?
320
00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:46,830
So l'm stood in Battersea Power Station
in nothing but me Tommy Hilfiger pants
321
00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:48,751
when he comes back in.
322
00:23:48,840 --> 00:23:51,513
Oh, blimey! lt's little Jimmy Osmond!
323
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:56,753
Settle down, here's a lad wants a go.
Come on, give him a chance.
324
00:23:56,840 --> 00:23:59,149
(& l Should Be So Lucky)
325
00:24:08,240 --> 00:24:10,390
Cos l just wanted to say...
326
00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:20,470
Cos that boy over there. Checked shirt,
white T-shirt, with the blonde girl, him.
327
00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:23,916
l'm in school with him.
His name is Christian Hobbs.
328
00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:26,833
And Christian Hobbs,
do you know what he does?
329
00:24:26,920 --> 00:24:31,596
He finds a boy, and if that boy's
a bit quiet, if he's a bit different,
330
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:35,719
Christian Hobbs kicks his head in
and he calls him queer.
331
00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:40,351
That boy there.
He beats us up cos we're queer.
332
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:43,874
Plenty more l could have said, Christian.
333
00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:46,076
And that's a favour.
334
00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:49,948
Oi, sonny Jim, that's your cue.
Now, fuck off out.
335
00:24:50,040 --> 00:24:51,996
Piss off.
336
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:56,119
l think that's what they call
the public service announcement!
337
00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:58,316
We've had a party!
338
00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:02,029
He's here! He's queer!
l'm buyin' him a beer!
339
00:25:02,120 --> 00:25:05,715
Hazel, l was thinking, it's been great
and l hope you don't mind
340
00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:08,030
but l think l might move back home.
341
00:25:08,120 --> 00:25:10,350
Bugger it, that's the rent money gone!
342
00:25:10,440 --> 00:25:13,955
Ooh, look at me, l'm filling up, l'm moist.
Can l have his room?
343
00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:16,190
You're dancing, you are!
344
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:20,994
(& Ultra Nate: Found A Cure)
345
00:25:21,080 --> 00:25:23,469
& Na-na-na-na, na na na... &
346
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:26,595
Shake a leg, Bernie, let's show 'em!
347
00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:32,075
& Feels like l'm going crazy
& Na-na-na-na
348
00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:35,994
& Feels like l'm going insane
& Na-na-na-na
349
00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:40,713
& Na-na-na-na... &
350
00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:43,917
See those two? That's us in 40 years!
351
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:46,514
That's me with the moustache!
352
00:25:46,600 --> 00:25:49,319
& Feels like l'm going insane... &
353
00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:52,676
Fifteen.
354
00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:54,955
(Both) Yeah.
355
00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:56,792
Bastard.
356
00:25:56,880 --> 00:26:00,953
& Feels like l'm going crazy
& Na-na-na-na
357
00:26:01,040 --> 00:26:04,669
& Feels like l'm going insane
& Na-na-na-na... &
358
00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:11,913
Marcie, can you take that to wages?
359
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:15,675
- What did your last slave die of?
- A good beating.
360
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:18,718
lt's for Simon Carter. Do you know him?
361
00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:21,360
Black hair, sort of Fox Mulder look.
362
00:26:21,440 --> 00:26:23,829
He's got the best arse in this shop.
363
00:26:25,120 --> 00:26:28,669
Will you put in a good word for me?
l've always fancied him.
364
00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:30,716
Run along.
365
00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:52,388
- Someone had to get the flags out!
- That's France, though.
366
00:26:52,480 --> 00:26:55,870
lt's all we had. lt came with the cheese.
367
00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:57,518
See you later.
368
00:26:57,600 --> 00:27:01,673
Maybe tomorrow.
You've seen enough of him, it's my turn.
369
00:27:03,360 --> 00:27:06,318
Donna! You left that bloody door open!
370
00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:15,392
l'm still gonna go out, to the Village.
371
00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:17,630
Not on school nights you're not.
372
00:27:20,320 --> 00:27:23,437
And l'm not gonna change.
You know that, don't you?
373
00:27:23,520 --> 00:27:26,717
Cos it isn't a phase.
l'm not gonna grow out of it.
374
00:27:28,880 --> 00:27:31,030
l'm gonna be gay forever.
375
00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:36,752
You've made your mind up.
lt's obvious there's no stopping you.
376
00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:43,794
lt's Helen l'm worried about.
She's ten years old.
377
00:27:43,880 --> 00:27:47,714
She's a child.
l don't want her head filled with notions.
378
00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:52,396
Like what?
379
00:27:54,920 --> 00:27:56,956
As far as Helen's concerned,
380
00:27:57,040 --> 00:27:58,996
the anus is for shit.
381
00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:04,036
Got that?
382
00:28:08,600 --> 00:28:11,876
Knock, knock.
Your sister's been saying...
383
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:32,676
No. She's not in her room.
384
00:28:42,640 --> 00:28:44,596
Me bloody wallet's gone.
385
00:28:44,680 --> 00:28:47,353
- Will that get us to London?
- Should do.
386
00:28:55,120 --> 00:28:57,429
Are you coming?
387
00:28:57,520 --> 00:29:00,159
This had better be good.
388
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:04,270
(Nathan) Get in.
389
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:12,111
& Deeper love, l've got a deeper love
390
00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:15,956
& Deeper love, l've got a deeper love
391
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:19,318
& Deeper love, l've got a deeper love
392
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:23,076
& Deeper love, l've got a deeper love... &
393
00:29:24,760 --> 00:29:27,115
Hello, sugarface, you all right?
394
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:30,078
My world's so fucking huge!
395
00:29:32,160 --> 00:29:36,039
Yeah. l know l'm late
but l had to buy them a drink at work.
396
00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:38,953
- (Cameron) 'Never mind them.'
- (Door creaks)
397
00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:41,600
Christ! You heard the door on this?
398
00:29:41,680 --> 00:29:45,116
l'll get it fixed.
Get a move on or we'll lose the table.
399
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,156
- (Creaking)
- Listen to that.
400
00:29:47,240 --> 00:29:50,038
'l know. Just leave it, just hurry up.'
401
00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:52,236
l'll get Bernie to fix it.
402
00:29:52,320 --> 00:29:55,676
'l wouldn't trust Bernie.
l'll take it to the garage.'
403
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,877
- l'll do it.
- Like you'll fix the door in your flat?
404
00:30:00,800 --> 00:30:02,631
l will.
405
00:30:02,720 --> 00:30:08,317
'lt's like waiting for a kid to tidy his room.
l paid for the thing, l'll take charge.'
406
00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:12,593
Vince? Are you there?
407
00:30:13,800 --> 00:30:15,950
'Vince? Are you still there?'
408
00:30:17,720 --> 00:30:20,075
How many Doctor Whos can you name?
409
00:30:20,160 --> 00:30:21,718
'What do you mean?'
410
00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:24,758
All the actors who played Doctor Who.
Name them.
411
00:30:24,840 --> 00:30:28,071
- 'l don't know.'
- Just try.
412
00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:32,073
'Well... Jon Pertwee, Tom Baker, um...'
413
00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:34,754
- ls that it?
- 'What does it matter?'
414
00:30:34,840 --> 00:30:36,796
Any more?
415
00:30:36,880 --> 00:30:40,350
- 'Er, the bloke with white hair.'
- William Hartnell.
416
00:30:40,440 --> 00:30:42,396
Any more?
417
00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:45,040
'The vet. What the hell does it matter?
418
00:30:47,080 --> 00:30:49,469
'Vince?'
419
00:30:49,560 --> 00:30:52,996
Sorry? What? lt's breaking up.
420
00:30:53,080 --> 00:30:55,435
We're breaking up. Sorry.
421
00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:13,039
& Santa Maria
422
00:31:13,120 --> 00:31:15,076
& Rhyme to the rhythm,
come on feel the rhythm
423
00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:17,674
& lt's a rhythm, a rhyme
that rocks the whole time
424
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:21,070
& Santa Maria
425
00:31:25,520 --> 00:31:28,717
& And l only want to be with you, baby
426
00:31:28,800 --> 00:31:33,430
& Yes, you know it's gonna be heaven
here with me... &
427
00:31:34,520 --> 00:31:36,795
Taxi! Taxi!
428
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:40,873
& Santa Maria
429
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:42,916
& Rhyme to the rhythm,
come on feel the rhythm
430
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:46,629
& lt's a rhythm, a rhyme
that rocks the whole time... &
431
00:31:48,200 --> 00:31:50,156
Taxi!
432
00:31:53,040 --> 00:31:55,235
- Big lssue?
- Yes, it is.
433
00:32:09,680 --> 00:32:12,069
Unrequited love, it's fantastic
434
00:32:12,160 --> 00:32:16,711
cos it never has to change, it never
has to grow up and it never has to die!
435
00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:19,439
& Santa Maria
436
00:32:19,520 --> 00:32:21,238
& Rhyme to the rhythm,
come on feel the rhythm
437
00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:23,709
& lt's a rhythm, a rhyme
that rocks the whole time... &
438
00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:27,753
Taxi!
439
00:32:27,840 --> 00:32:30,195
(& The Weather Girls: lt's Raining Men)
440
00:32:44,320 --> 00:32:46,276
(lnaudible)
441
00:32:53,040 --> 00:32:55,429
& Humidity is rising
442
00:32:56,520 --> 00:32:59,876
& Barometer's getting low
443
00:32:59,960 --> 00:33:03,953
& According to all sources
444
00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:06,759
& The street's the place to go
445
00:33:06,840 --> 00:33:10,628
& Cos tonight for the first time
446
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:13,598
& Just about half past ten
447
00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:17,639
& For the first time in history
448
00:33:17,720 --> 00:33:21,269
& lt's gonna start raining men
449
00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:24,310
& lt's raining men
450
00:33:24,400 --> 00:33:27,676
& Hallelujah! lt's raining men
451
00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:29,716
& Amen
452
00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:33,873
& l'm gonna go out,
l'm gonna let myself get
453
00:33:33,960 --> 00:33:37,999
& Absolutely soaking wet
454
00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:40,389
& lt's raining men
455
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:42,914
& Hallelujah! lt's raining men
456
00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:46,355
& Every specimen
457
00:33:46,440 --> 00:33:49,955
& Tall, blond, dark and lean
458
00:33:50,040 --> 00:33:54,272
& Rough and tough and strong and mean
459
00:33:55,360 --> 00:33:58,830
& God bless Mother Nature
460
00:33:58,920 --> 00:34:02,595
& She's a single woman too
461
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:05,274
& She took over heaven... &
35201
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