All language subtitles for Man with a plan - S03E21 Adams Ribs

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,674 --> 00:00:10,173 Hey. 2 00:00:10,259 --> 00:00:13,260 If we have to listen, you have to listen. 3 00:00:15,923 --> 00:00:17,923 Oh. 4 00:00:19,351 --> 00:00:21,694 Well, I just loved it, Emme. 5 00:00:21,896 --> 00:00:24,647 I loved it, too. I don't think I'll ever forget it. 6 00:00:24,732 --> 00:00:26,482 I can't wait for my recital. 7 00:00:28,374 --> 00:00:29,986 It's a two-hour concert, Adam. 8 00:00:30,071 --> 00:00:31,737 What if she's the best one? 9 00:00:32,476 --> 00:00:34,874 Uh, we'll boo. 10 00:00:34,909 --> 00:00:37,190 Other people's kids need to know the truth. 11 00:00:37,745 --> 00:00:40,329 Oh, hey, Katie, by the way, 12 00:00:40,415 --> 00:00:41,881 there's a new Godzilla movie out. 13 00:00:42,510 --> 00:00:43,749 What? 14 00:00:43,802 --> 00:00:45,835 I said there's a new Godzilla movie out. 15 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:48,242 We've been to every one. You want to go this weekend? 16 00:00:48,457 --> 00:00:50,374 Thanks, but I'm okay. 17 00:00:51,734 --> 00:00:52,842 Well, I know you're okay, 18 00:00:52,927 --> 00:00:54,807 I was just wondering if you want to see a movie. 19 00:00:55,543 --> 00:00:57,007 What? 20 00:00:58,200 --> 00:00:59,699 Never mind. 21 00:01:03,069 --> 00:01:05,487 "I'm okay"? What the heck is "I'm okay"? 22 00:01:05,512 --> 00:01:07,190 "I'm okay" is a nice way of saying, 23 00:01:07,275 --> 00:01:10,943 "I'd rather do nothing alone than something with you." 24 00:01:11,966 --> 00:01:14,363 She used to love doing stuff with me. 25 00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:16,365 Well, I'll see the movie with you. 26 00:01:16,451 --> 00:01:19,176 Eh, thanks, but I'm okay. 27 00:01:19,838 --> 00:01:21,954 Honey, don't take it personally, all right? 28 00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:24,624 Maybe she doesn't like Godzilla movies anymore. 29 00:01:24,676 --> 00:01:28,427 Andi, everybody likes Godzilla. 30 00:01:28,463 --> 00:01:30,618 Not me. I-I don't get it. 31 00:01:30,643 --> 00:01:33,432 I-Is he a dinosaur, a-a dragon? 32 00:01:33,468 --> 00:01:36,602 Maybe he destroys cities 'cause he doesn't know what he is. 33 00:01:37,470 --> 00:01:40,389 He was created by an atomic explosion. 34 00:01:40,475 --> 00:01:42,703 See, the radiation... Y-You know what? 35 00:01:42,728 --> 00:01:44,278 I'm not explaining it to you again. 36 00:01:45,751 --> 00:01:48,625 Look, honey, Kate's getting older. 37 00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:50,283 Okay? You're the parent. 38 00:01:50,318 --> 00:01:53,236 It's your job to figure out how to connect with her. 39 00:01:53,321 --> 00:01:55,871 Yeah, I just need to find something we have in common. 40 00:01:55,896 --> 00:01:59,815 Used to be Godzilla, now I have no idea. 41 00:02:00,495 --> 00:02:02,078 - Planet of the Apes, maybe? - Eh... 42 00:02:03,998 --> 00:02:06,713 Hey, Dad, can you drop me at the mall after school tomorrow? 43 00:02:11,894 --> 00:02:13,477 N-No problem. 44 00:02:13,502 --> 00:02:15,168 I am always here for you. 45 00:02:15,296 --> 00:02:17,843 Hey, how about a hug? Huh? Aww. 46 00:02:17,896 --> 00:02:20,096 Huh...? 47 00:02:21,637 --> 00:02:23,136 That was no hug. 48 00:02:23,161 --> 00:02:25,669 It's like she bumped into me by accident. 49 00:02:26,614 --> 00:02:28,604 Yeah, the good hug days are over. 50 00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:29,917 If it makes you feel any better, 51 00:02:29,941 --> 00:02:31,524 I don't get them anymore, either. 52 00:02:31,576 --> 00:02:34,610 You know what? It does not make me feel any better. 53 00:02:37,031 --> 00:02:39,448 You're not gonna believe this. I won the lottery. 54 00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:42,285 Oh, my God. How much? 55 00:02:42,370 --> 00:02:43,869 The barbecue ribs lottery. 56 00:02:43,922 --> 00:02:45,838 Oh, my God. How much? 57 00:02:46,401 --> 00:02:47,818 What is a ribs lottery? 58 00:02:47,843 --> 00:02:50,351 I-It's for Frank's Underground Barbecue. 59 00:02:50,376 --> 00:02:52,795 He's a backyard chef who randomly texts people 60 00:02:52,880 --> 00:02:55,131 from his list when a new batch of ribs is ready... 61 00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:56,777 if you're not gonna know about Godzilla, 62 00:02:56,801 --> 00:02:59,635 at least know about Frank. 63 00:02:59,721 --> 00:03:02,471 Oh. This is the perfect way to connect with Katie. 64 00:03:02,557 --> 00:03:03,639 She loves ribs. 65 00:03:03,725 --> 00:03:04,868 Yeah, you know, when she was little, 66 00:03:04,892 --> 00:03:07,442 I used to take her for barbecue on my motorcycle. 67 00:03:07,762 --> 00:03:10,062 You put my baby on the back of your motorcycle? 68 00:03:10,114 --> 00:03:11,564 Come pick them up with me. 69 00:03:11,616 --> 00:03:13,399 We can put the ribs in Emme's old car seat. 70 00:03:13,484 --> 00:03:14,650 Safety first. 71 00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:19,538 - Ooh. - Whoa... 72 00:03:19,574 --> 00:03:21,707 Check out those ribs, Andi. 73 00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:23,721 You know, you look at cows, and they're kind of ugly, 74 00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:25,222 but when you chop them up into little pieces, 75 00:03:25,246 --> 00:03:27,544 - they're beautiful. - Yeah. 76 00:03:27,778 --> 00:03:29,666 You know, we almost didn't find Frank's Barbecue. 77 00:03:29,690 --> 00:03:31,417 We had to follow the smoke in the sky, 78 00:03:31,502 --> 00:03:32,947 like when they choose a new pope. 79 00:03:32,971 --> 00:03:34,337 Yeah. 80 00:03:35,110 --> 00:03:37,056 Katie, look, I got all your favorites. 81 00:03:37,091 --> 00:03:40,688 Ribs, mac and cheese, pork and beans. 82 00:03:40,969 --> 00:03:43,012 Actually, I'm a vegan now. 83 00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:45,898 What? 84 00:03:46,819 --> 00:03:49,239 I'm a vegan. I don't eat meat anymore. 85 00:03:49,637 --> 00:03:51,187 Why? 86 00:03:51,973 --> 00:03:52,769 Wait, 87 00:03:52,794 --> 00:03:53,739 we can do that? 88 00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:55,606 You always say we have to eat whatever Mom makes, 89 00:03:55,630 --> 00:03:57,046 even if it's gross. 90 00:03:57,505 --> 00:04:00,247 Like her Andi Patties. 91 00:04:00,999 --> 00:04:02,476 Why won't you tell us what's in them? 92 00:04:02,500 --> 00:04:04,606 Because I want you to eat them. 93 00:04:05,708 --> 00:04:07,586 So you're a vegan now, huh? 94 00:04:07,622 --> 00:04:09,255 Good for you. I call Kate's ribs. 95 00:04:09,290 --> 00:04:11,457 Oh, no, no, no. 96 00:04:11,482 --> 00:04:15,135 Look, honey, we don't allow vegans in this house. 97 00:04:15,666 --> 00:04:17,563 Okay? When you're older, and you build a house 98 00:04:17,588 --> 00:04:20,216 with your bare hands, you can let vegans in it. 99 00:04:20,441 --> 00:04:21,857 You didn't build this house. 100 00:04:22,248 --> 00:04:24,081 I installed the icemaker. 101 00:04:26,181 --> 00:04:27,246 Adam, 102 00:04:27,666 --> 00:04:30,554 what I'm hearing is that Kate has a new interest, 103 00:04:30,579 --> 00:04:32,895 which you might be interested in connecting to. 104 00:04:32,980 --> 00:04:34,720 I can't connect to that. 105 00:04:35,397 --> 00:04:37,087 She eats plants. 106 00:04:37,535 --> 00:04:40,236 I eat food you have to hunt. 107 00:04:40,745 --> 00:04:42,455 It's a cow, Adam. 108 00:04:43,097 --> 00:04:45,081 I didn't say it was hard. 109 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:53,074 110 00:04:57,255 --> 00:04:59,389 So is vegan like vegetarian? 111 00:04:59,424 --> 00:05:01,224 Uh, what things can't you eat? 112 00:05:01,259 --> 00:05:05,311 Well, there's meat, fish, cheese, milk, butter. 113 00:05:05,346 --> 00:05:07,063 But those are all the things. 114 00:05:08,170 --> 00:05:10,183 They showed us a documentary about it at school, 115 00:05:10,268 --> 00:05:12,769 and if you guys could've seen the faces on those animals, 116 00:05:12,854 --> 00:05:14,437 you'd agree with me. 117 00:05:14,489 --> 00:05:17,190 This is a terrible idea. Think of your mother. 118 00:05:17,275 --> 00:05:19,909 She's gonna have to cook two different dinners every night. 119 00:05:19,944 --> 00:05:21,332 Well, you could cook one. 120 00:05:22,965 --> 00:05:25,048 I am on your side, here. 121 00:05:25,950 --> 00:05:27,583 Don, help me out? 122 00:05:27,619 --> 00:05:29,252 No can do. The ribs are kicking in. 123 00:05:29,287 --> 00:05:30,590 Time to take a meat nap. 124 00:05:32,782 --> 00:05:33,953 Mom, 125 00:05:33,978 --> 00:05:35,977 Emme and I decided to only eat cake now. 126 00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:38,920 If Kate gets to go vegan, than we get to go caken. 127 00:05:40,632 --> 00:05:43,299 Well, my Andi Patties could be made of cake. You don't know. 128 00:05:43,384 --> 00:05:45,301 I think they're made of ear wax. 129 00:05:45,971 --> 00:05:47,721 Okay, go upstairs, please. 130 00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:50,940 You see? 131 00:05:50,975 --> 00:05:54,560 Your vegan kick has started a house-wide rebellion. 132 00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:55,873 If you'd just watch the documentary with me, 133 00:05:55,897 --> 00:05:57,063 you'd get it. 134 00:05:57,148 --> 00:05:58,763 Look, I brought home a copy. 135 00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:03,453 "Apocalypse Cow"? 136 00:06:05,657 --> 00:06:07,481 Thanks, but I'm okay. 137 00:06:08,114 --> 00:06:10,177 This is your chance to connect with her. 138 00:06:10,202 --> 00:06:12,462 Yeah, well, I don't agree with her, 139 00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:14,464 I am top of the food chain. 140 00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:17,834 When a cow installs an icemaker, I will stop eating it. 141 00:06:18,466 --> 00:06:21,671 You don't have to really be interested, you just fake it. 142 00:06:21,723 --> 00:06:24,674 Like, like, I do when Teddy tells me about his video games. 143 00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:27,143 "Mom, I zapped a space trooper." 144 00:06:27,178 --> 00:06:29,588 "That's great honey." Hug. 145 00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:33,599 You think if I watch that movie with Katie, she'll hug me? 146 00:06:33,685 --> 00:06:35,485 She might go full koala. 147 00:06:38,127 --> 00:06:40,356 All right, I'll try it. 148 00:06:42,698 --> 00:06:44,982 Remember when the kids were all over us all the time? 149 00:06:46,414 --> 00:06:48,468 - Maybe we should have another baby. - Really? 150 00:06:51,627 --> 00:06:53,605 No, no, I'll try this. 151 00:06:54,941 --> 00:06:56,789 Before we start, I just want you to know 152 00:06:56,814 --> 00:06:58,675 it means a lot that you'll watch this with me. 153 00:06:58,710 --> 00:07:01,127 Hey, I like spending time with you. 154 00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:03,963 But this movie is not gonna change how I feel. 155 00:07:04,048 --> 00:07:07,049 I know how the sausage is made, and it's delicious. 156 00:07:10,337 --> 00:07:13,306 I did not know how the sausage was made. 157 00:07:13,712 --> 00:07:16,475 And why'd they name the chickens after famous people? 158 00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:19,028 That just made us sadder when they got eaten. 159 00:07:19,291 --> 00:07:21,981 Poor Anne Hatch-away. 160 00:07:22,066 --> 00:07:25,093 And what about her husband, Eggy Van Halen? 161 00:07:25,343 --> 00:07:28,499 He's heartbroken, she was the one. 162 00:07:29,772 --> 00:07:32,875 I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm done with meat. 163 00:07:32,911 --> 00:07:35,545 - What? - I mean it, Katie. 164 00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:37,079 I'm going vegan with you. 165 00:07:37,587 --> 00:07:38,620 Really? 166 00:07:38,645 --> 00:07:40,323 I love you, Dad. 167 00:07:40,348 --> 00:07:42,168 I love you, honey. 168 00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:44,053 Oh, oh, are we done? Okay. 169 00:07:44,088 --> 00:07:47,056 Hey, I'll get Mom to do it, too. 170 00:07:47,614 --> 00:07:49,197 You're the best. 171 00:07:55,435 --> 00:07:57,934 Brace yourself. I've got big news. 172 00:07:57,986 --> 00:08:00,019 Katie hugged me. 173 00:08:00,104 --> 00:08:02,021 Aww, that's great. 174 00:08:02,106 --> 00:08:04,774 And all you had to do was fake some interest. 175 00:08:04,859 --> 00:08:06,242 Parenting's easy. 176 00:08:06,589 --> 00:08:08,945 That's the other thing. I'm not faking. 177 00:08:08,997 --> 00:08:10,529 I am going vegan. 178 00:08:10,615 --> 00:08:12,866 Yeah, right. 179 00:08:12,891 --> 00:08:14,083 I am. 180 00:08:14,118 --> 00:08:17,086 - Oh, also, I told her you'd do it too. - What? 181 00:08:17,121 --> 00:08:18,750 It bought me another hug, I'm not sorry. 182 00:08:18,775 --> 00:08:21,874 What... s-so now if I don't do it, I look like a jerk. 183 00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:23,734 All you had to do was fake it. 184 00:08:23,759 --> 00:08:26,762 I couldn't. The movie was too powerful. 185 00:08:26,798 --> 00:08:29,048 There was this cow, his name was Paul MooCartney... 186 00:08:29,133 --> 00:08:32,457 and... and do you know what veal is? 187 00:08:32,482 --> 00:08:35,271 How can we be Parmesan-ing those little guys? 188 00:08:36,060 --> 00:08:37,473 So Kate really hugged you? 189 00:08:37,525 --> 00:08:39,237 Yeah, like this. 190 00:08:40,190 --> 00:08:43,980 - Oh. Wow. - Yeah. 191 00:08:44,032 --> 00:08:47,149 Last time I got a hug like that, I had to buy her a phone. 192 00:08:47,201 --> 00:08:49,690 But even then she hugged the phone tighter. 193 00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:51,954 Okay, I'll do it. 194 00:08:51,990 --> 00:08:53,456 Oh, this is gonna be so great. 195 00:08:53,491 --> 00:08:55,781 We'll be healthier, happier and huggier. 196 00:08:55,806 --> 00:08:57,910 Okay, but-but, hey, I just, I need to know 197 00:08:57,996 --> 00:08:59,813 - that you're really committed. - Well... 198 00:08:59,837 --> 00:09:01,025 Don't you remember when you promised 199 00:09:01,049 --> 00:09:02,331 to do couples yoga with me? 200 00:09:02,383 --> 00:09:03,727 You didn't even make it through one class. 201 00:09:03,751 --> 00:09:06,636 That lady touched my rear end. 202 00:09:07,244 --> 00:09:10,139 She was the instructor, and she was adjusting your pose. 203 00:09:10,174 --> 00:09:12,475 She made it halfway to third base, Andi. 204 00:09:12,728 --> 00:09:14,810 But this isn't like that. 205 00:09:14,846 --> 00:09:17,329 I promise, I am fully committed. 206 00:09:17,994 --> 00:09:18,814 Okay. 207 00:09:18,850 --> 00:09:20,316 - Okay. - Wait. 208 00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:23,885 You do know that going vegan means no more McNuggets, right? 209 00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:27,523 I hadn't thought of that. 210 00:09:27,575 --> 00:09:29,608 I can do it. 211 00:09:32,675 --> 00:09:35,831 So here's what we've prepared for your first vegan experience. 212 00:09:35,867 --> 00:09:38,617 Yeah. These nuggets are made of tofu, 213 00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:41,203 so they're chick-none nuggets. 214 00:09:41,255 --> 00:09:43,867 Okay? They taste just like chicken, but wet. 215 00:09:44,467 --> 00:09:46,093 Eat it like an oyster. 216 00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:49,109 And this is macaroni and cashew cheese. 217 00:09:49,134 --> 00:09:53,132 Yeah, all the fun of cashews, but in a paste. 218 00:09:53,477 --> 00:09:56,055 So you're trying to feed me nut cheese? 219 00:09:57,118 --> 00:09:59,093 Look, I know it's a big adjustment, 220 00:09:59,118 --> 00:10:00,856 but there is an upside. 221 00:10:00,892 --> 00:10:03,976 We get to act superior by telling everybody we're vegan. 222 00:10:04,826 --> 00:10:06,729 And we're saving animals' lives. 223 00:10:06,814 --> 00:10:08,698 Yeah, that, too. 224 00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:10,649 Yeah, and we had a vegan breakfast. 225 00:10:10,735 --> 00:10:13,152 Bathroom-wise, it's much more efficient. 226 00:10:13,237 --> 00:10:15,071 Okay, first bite starts the clock, 227 00:10:15,123 --> 00:10:17,193 so I don't recommend eating in the car. 228 00:10:17,490 --> 00:10:19,123 Bon app�tit, everyone. 229 00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:24,380 Don! 230 00:10:24,415 --> 00:10:25,881 It was a primitive instinct. 231 00:10:25,917 --> 00:10:28,412 I ate poison and my body rejected it. 232 00:10:29,951 --> 00:10:31,670 All right, well, that-that-that's okay. 233 00:10:31,756 --> 00:10:32,796 It takes a little getting used to, 234 00:10:32,820 --> 00:10:34,902 but it's for the animals. Right, Katie? 235 00:10:34,926 --> 00:10:36,675 That's right, Dad. 236 00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:39,678 This is even worse than Andi Patties. 237 00:10:40,791 --> 00:10:44,493 Yeah, it tastes like an Andi Patty's butt. 238 00:10:45,264 --> 00:10:47,069 Enough of this beatnik nonsense. 239 00:10:47,105 --> 00:10:49,146 Don, get those ribs out of the fridge. 240 00:10:49,171 --> 00:10:52,074 Dad, we don't eat that anymore. 241 00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:55,111 I didn't spend the Christmas of '66 dodging bullets 242 00:10:55,196 --> 00:10:57,780 in a rice paddy to eat snot nuggets. 243 00:10:59,516 --> 00:11:01,128 You have to decide right now, 244 00:11:01,153 --> 00:11:03,252 are you a vegan or an American? 245 00:11:04,425 --> 00:11:06,038 You're missing the point. 246 00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:08,853 Those ribs came from an innocent cow. 247 00:11:08,878 --> 00:11:10,626 Cows are designed to be eaten. 248 00:11:10,711 --> 00:11:12,928 They're made of steak and cheese. 249 00:11:13,667 --> 00:11:17,633 You know what? You two are a bad influence, so these ribs 250 00:11:17,685 --> 00:11:19,260 are going where they belong, 251 00:11:19,285 --> 00:11:21,554 - in the trash. - I'm proud of you, honey. 252 00:11:21,639 --> 00:11:22,938 Thank you. 253 00:11:23,823 --> 00:11:26,488 Now, who wants a soy-glazed mushroom cutlet? 254 00:11:26,949 --> 00:11:28,444 Donny, you know what to do. 255 00:11:28,479 --> 00:11:29,785 I'm one step ahead of you, Pop. 256 00:11:31,652 --> 00:11:32,972 What? 257 00:11:34,582 --> 00:11:36,986 You think the trash is gonna scare me? 258 00:11:37,038 --> 00:11:39,071 In the service, they called me The Raccoon. 259 00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:51,547 Okay, okay, sweetie. So beautiful. 260 00:11:51,572 --> 00:11:53,187 Um, 261 00:11:53,212 --> 00:11:54,815 why don't you go get dressed for your recital? 262 00:11:54,839 --> 00:11:56,639 I'm not going too fancy. 263 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,341 I'll let my music speak for itself. 264 00:11:59,728 --> 00:12:01,762 Never lose that confidence, sweetie. 265 00:12:04,599 --> 00:12:07,313 Ugh. What? 266 00:12:07,969 --> 00:12:10,686 Oh, who leaves a half-eaten Slim Jim in their backpack? 267 00:12:10,738 --> 00:12:12,734 It's all covered with lint 268 00:12:12,759 --> 00:12:16,304 and hair and... deliciousness. 269 00:12:17,956 --> 00:12:19,122 Andi! 270 00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:21,113 Put down that Slim Jim. 271 00:12:21,519 --> 00:12:22,766 Too late. 272 00:12:24,345 --> 00:12:25,868 It wasn't too late. 273 00:12:25,953 --> 00:12:28,454 You saw me and then you ate it. 274 00:12:28,539 --> 00:12:30,228 And now it's too late. 275 00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:33,888 Just don't tell Kate, okay? 276 00:12:33,945 --> 00:12:36,295 This vegan thing is working for me, too. 277 00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:37,880 This morning, she took out an earbud 278 00:12:37,965 --> 00:12:42,218 and voluntarily spoke to me. She... she said, 279 00:12:42,303 --> 00:12:43,938 "Can I have ten dollars?" 280 00:12:46,001 --> 00:12:47,843 I'm not gonna tell Katie 281 00:12:47,868 --> 00:12:50,192 because I enjoy having the moral high ground. 282 00:12:50,228 --> 00:12:52,438 The view's nice, I've never been up here before. 283 00:12:53,774 --> 00:12:56,065 Hey, Mom, thank you so much 284 00:12:56,150 --> 00:12:58,150 for buying me those strawberry snack bars. 285 00:12:58,236 --> 00:12:59,652 Oh, honey, you're welcome. 286 00:12:59,737 --> 00:13:02,451 No, seriously, it means a lot that you support my choices. 287 00:13:02,551 --> 00:13:03,934 Aw. 288 00:13:07,235 --> 00:13:08,818 Your mom ate a Slim Jim. 289 00:13:11,582 --> 00:13:13,165 - What? - Yeah. 290 00:13:13,251 --> 00:13:15,918 She barely chewed it, she was like a seal with a fish. 291 00:13:17,496 --> 00:13:19,054 Oh, Mom. 292 00:13:19,079 --> 00:13:20,879 Your mother's betrayal must be very hard for you. 293 00:13:20,903 --> 00:13:21,943 Come on, let's hug it out. 294 00:13:23,064 --> 00:13:24,393 Well, I'm not that upset. 295 00:13:24,418 --> 00:13:25,667 No, no, it's for your own good. 296 00:13:36,315 --> 00:13:38,949 Okay, Don's all set up in the back 297 00:13:38,984 --> 00:13:40,450 to record Emme's recital. 298 00:13:40,519 --> 00:13:42,110 He's so tall, no one can block him. 299 00:13:42,135 --> 00:13:44,766 He's like a giraffe with a camera. 300 00:13:46,585 --> 00:13:48,592 Don't act like everything's fine. 301 00:13:49,430 --> 00:13:51,161 You sold me out to Kate. 302 00:13:51,213 --> 00:13:52,828 I had to. 303 00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:55,783 There's only a limited amount of hugs until she goes to college. 304 00:13:55,868 --> 00:13:57,671 I'm getting as many as I can. 305 00:13:57,812 --> 00:13:59,003 What about me? 306 00:13:59,038 --> 00:14:01,505 You're fine, the breastfeeding years 307 00:14:01,541 --> 00:14:04,458 were like one long hug for you. 308 00:14:04,544 --> 00:14:06,249 It's my time. 309 00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:09,179 Hi. 310 00:14:09,215 --> 00:14:10,881 Yes, we're arguing, 311 00:14:10,967 --> 00:14:14,134 but life is complicated for us because we're vegan. 312 00:14:14,220 --> 00:14:17,550 Yeah, that's right, full-blown vegan. 313 00:14:18,379 --> 00:14:21,730 Well, some of us are. She cheated on me. 314 00:14:21,964 --> 00:14:23,477 With jerky. 315 00:14:23,563 --> 00:14:25,145 And I am back on the wagon. 316 00:14:25,223 --> 00:14:27,632 Yeah, I made a chicken for Teddy and Emme today, 317 00:14:27,666 --> 00:14:28,915 I wasn't even tempted. 318 00:14:30,068 --> 00:14:32,071 I saved the gizzards for Andi Patties. 319 00:14:33,573 --> 00:14:35,406 Next up, Emme Burns. 320 00:14:35,491 --> 00:14:38,909 Oh, there she is. That's our daughter. 321 00:14:45,128 --> 00:14:46,690 She's not a vegan. 322 00:14:49,753 --> 00:14:50,800 This is a great gig. 323 00:14:50,825 --> 00:14:52,783 I just made 40 bucks charging short moms 324 00:14:52,808 --> 00:14:54,224 to videotape their kids. 325 00:14:55,253 --> 00:14:57,928 Don, this is my kid's school. 326 00:14:58,014 --> 00:14:59,513 I should get half. 327 00:15:01,100 --> 00:15:03,601 Ugh. Look at this. 328 00:15:03,626 --> 00:15:06,729 I finally get picked for Frank's barbecue and I can't have it. 329 00:15:06,754 --> 00:15:08,083 It's like when my high school teacher 330 00:15:08,107 --> 00:15:09,823 hit on me after I was married. 331 00:15:09,848 --> 00:15:12,762 Ah, Miss Popovich. She made algebra sexy. 332 00:15:13,402 --> 00:15:16,030 I wore a tank top for four years, nothing. 333 00:15:16,115 --> 00:15:18,408 Married six months, here she comes. 334 00:15:19,368 --> 00:15:21,201 I'll just text and say I don't want the ribs. 335 00:15:21,287 --> 00:15:22,674 Whoa, don't do that. I'll take them. 336 00:15:22,698 --> 00:15:24,266 Well, if you want them, go get them yourself. 337 00:15:24,290 --> 00:15:26,180 I can't, they check your ID. 338 00:15:26,205 --> 00:15:27,591 - Ugh. - Come on, you owe me. 339 00:15:27,627 --> 00:15:29,651 You threw my ribs in the garbage. I didn't get any. 340 00:15:29,676 --> 00:15:31,629 Raccoons don't share. 341 00:15:33,980 --> 00:15:35,396 Okay, fine, I'll go, 342 00:15:35,421 --> 00:15:36,884 but Andi can never know. 343 00:15:36,969 --> 00:15:38,435 I snitched on her for sneaking jerky 344 00:15:38,471 --> 00:15:40,467 and she's looking for revenge. 345 00:15:40,492 --> 00:15:42,351 You guys have a weird marriage. 346 00:15:43,070 --> 00:15:45,717 - Will you please? - Okay, I'll cover for you. 347 00:15:45,742 --> 00:15:49,480 Okay, just, uh, oh, tell Andi I went home to use the bathroom. 348 00:15:49,532 --> 00:15:51,241 I'm a vegan, she'll believe it. 349 00:15:54,780 --> 00:15:57,832 Okay, Emme went to a sleepover. Where's Adam? 350 00:15:57,857 --> 00:15:59,751 Oh, he was having vegan problems, 351 00:15:59,776 --> 00:16:01,589 so he went home to use the bathroom. 352 00:16:01,614 --> 00:16:03,134 Why wouldn't he use the bathroom here? 353 00:16:03,877 --> 00:16:08,181 Well, because he wanted to stop on the way 354 00:16:08,206 --> 00:16:09,917 and get Emme flowers 355 00:16:10,190 --> 00:16:12,419 because the recital was so good. 356 00:16:12,505 --> 00:16:15,003 Okay, now I know you're lying. 357 00:16:15,550 --> 00:16:17,204 Where is he? 358 00:16:17,307 --> 00:16:20,136 Fine, he's sleeping with his high school teacher. 359 00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:22,016 Don. 360 00:16:22,183 --> 00:16:24,931 Okay, okay, he won the barbecue lottery. 361 00:16:24,956 --> 00:16:26,479 He went to pick up the ribs. 362 00:16:26,543 --> 00:16:28,435 Oh, you have got to be kidding me. 363 00:16:28,521 --> 00:16:30,654 Mister Holier-Than-Thou is getting ribs 364 00:16:30,690 --> 00:16:32,322 while-while I'm an outcast 365 00:16:32,358 --> 00:16:35,292 for eating a hairy, backpack Slim Jim? 366 00:16:35,940 --> 00:16:38,673 He's not getting them for himself, he's giving them to me. 367 00:16:38,698 --> 00:16:40,197 Come on, Don, we both know better. 368 00:16:40,282 --> 00:16:41,865 He can't resist barbecue. 369 00:16:41,951 --> 00:16:44,201 His first time alone in the car with those ribs 370 00:16:44,286 --> 00:16:47,037 will be like his first time alone in a car with me. 371 00:16:47,089 --> 00:16:48,706 Lots of grabbing, heavy breathing, 372 00:16:48,791 --> 00:16:50,708 and windows steaming up. 373 00:16:51,041 --> 00:16:53,266 - He's not doing that to my ribs. - Let's go. 374 00:16:58,750 --> 00:17:02,136 Smell good all you want, I'm taking you to Don's. 375 00:17:02,451 --> 00:17:05,826 I'm doing this for Katie and Anne Hatch-away, 376 00:17:06,308 --> 00:17:08,857 and Veal Patrick Harris. 377 00:17:10,748 --> 00:17:14,732 Aw, who am I kidding? I can't control myself. 378 00:17:14,784 --> 00:17:18,197 This is just like my first time alone in the car with Andi. 379 00:17:18,222 --> 00:17:20,284 I'm sorry, Katie. 380 00:17:21,612 --> 00:17:24,417 I saw his truck. He's here with those ribs. 381 00:17:25,628 --> 00:17:29,112 I smell it. The meat is near. 382 00:17:33,830 --> 00:17:36,111 Good boy, Don, good boy. 383 00:17:47,103 --> 00:17:48,766 Classic meat nap. 384 00:17:49,136 --> 00:17:50,969 Look how happy he is. 385 00:17:50,994 --> 00:17:52,686 I'm going to get the hose. 386 00:17:52,772 --> 00:17:56,228 Wait, Andi, let's remember what's important here. 387 00:17:58,025 --> 00:17:59,859 Okay, let him have it. 388 00:18:01,413 --> 00:18:04,687 Okay, I'm sorry I ate the ribs. 389 00:18:04,765 --> 00:18:06,950 Lay it on me, I deserve it. 390 00:18:07,002 --> 00:18:09,927 No, you know what? This makes sense 391 00:18:09,952 --> 00:18:11,577 'cause for a couple hours today I was thinking 392 00:18:11,601 --> 00:18:13,018 you were better than me, and then I was like, 393 00:18:13,042 --> 00:18:15,425 "Well, that can't be right." And look, it's not. 394 00:18:16,918 --> 00:18:19,534 The thing is, I can't be a vegan. 395 00:18:19,559 --> 00:18:23,403 It's like asking Godzilla not to stomp on Tokyo. 396 00:18:23,989 --> 00:18:26,804 He has to do it, it's who he is. 397 00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:29,900 You gonna tell Kate? 398 00:18:29,925 --> 00:18:33,297 Well, yeah, I can't let her hug a lie. 399 00:18:33,322 --> 00:18:36,080 She deserves the truth. I'll-I'll go tell her now. 400 00:18:36,322 --> 00:18:38,063 Hey, maybe bring her 401 00:18:38,088 --> 00:18:40,588 one of those strawberry snack bars to soften her up. 402 00:18:40,613 --> 00:18:41,779 Got me a hug. 403 00:18:47,196 --> 00:18:48,876 - Katie? - I'm sorry. 404 00:18:48,911 --> 00:18:50,806 I saw chicken in the fridge and I couldn't resist. 405 00:18:50,830 --> 00:18:52,732 I love meat too much. 406 00:18:53,215 --> 00:18:54,832 So do I! 407 00:18:54,917 --> 00:18:57,247 I just ate a half a cow. 408 00:18:58,240 --> 00:19:01,638 Really? That makes me feel so much better. 409 00:19:02,752 --> 00:19:05,142 Oh, and this hug is even nicer 410 00:19:05,177 --> 00:19:07,572 because we both smell like meat. 411 00:19:10,477 --> 00:19:11,837 Nah! 412 00:19:14,740 --> 00:19:15,856 Ah... 413 00:19:21,701 --> 00:19:23,470 Ah, that was some good chicken. 414 00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:24,618 Mm. 415 00:19:24,672 --> 00:19:27,277 Anne Hatch-away and her finger-licking friends 416 00:19:27,302 --> 00:19:29,513 went out in a blaze of glory. 417 00:19:30,439 --> 00:19:32,706 And we put out that blaze with honey mustard. 418 00:19:32,731 --> 00:19:34,980 Yeah. 419 00:19:35,716 --> 00:19:38,505 I do feel kind of bad for giving up though. 420 00:19:39,345 --> 00:19:40,629 Hey, 421 00:19:40,654 --> 00:19:42,216 how about this? 422 00:19:42,497 --> 00:19:44,153 We'll keep eating meat, 423 00:19:44,178 --> 00:19:46,466 but we'll donate to the animal rights people. 424 00:19:46,661 --> 00:19:47,802 Really? 425 00:19:47,844 --> 00:19:49,859 Yeah. We'll do whatever we want, 426 00:19:49,892 --> 00:19:53,059 but we'll give a little money to the people who do the right thing. 427 00:19:53,434 --> 00:19:54,473 Okay? 428 00:19:55,341 --> 00:19:58,779 And that is how you get around that. 429 00:20:00,536 --> 00:20:05,536 Synced and corrected by Octavia - www.addic7ed.com - 430 00:20:06,305 --> 00:20:12,155 31033

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