Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:25,898 --> 00:00:28,766
I think that there's
something wrong with me.
2
00:00:28,767 --> 00:00:33,004
For some reason I find that
the girls that I like as human beings,
3
00:00:33,005 --> 00:00:34,772
I'm not sexually attracted to,
4
00:00:34,773 --> 00:00:36,808
and the ones that I am
sexually attracted to,
5
00:00:36,809 --> 00:00:38,810
I don't particularly
like as human beings...
6
00:00:38,811 --> 00:00:40,778
and on the rare occasion when
one falls in both categories,
7
00:00:40,779 --> 00:00:43,715
they usually have a
boyfriend or a husband...
8
00:00:43,716 --> 00:00:45,650
and Lord knows I've got
enough of that bad karma
9
00:00:45,651 --> 00:00:47,251
to last me a lifetime.
10
00:00:47,252 --> 00:00:52,090
These are classic Freudian
symptoms, Conrad.
11
00:00:52,091 --> 00:00:55,931
Haven't you ever read
about defense mechanisms?
12
00:00:58,531 --> 00:00:59,998
Actually I've always considered myself
13
00:00:59,999 --> 00:01:01,367
more of a Jungian.
14
00:02:26,485 --> 00:02:28,853
Your phone is ringing again.
15
00:02:28,854 --> 00:02:30,421
Please stop talking.
16
00:02:30,422 --> 00:02:32,423
You stop talking.
17
00:02:32,424 --> 00:02:33,424
All right.
18
00:02:37,795 --> 00:02:39,297
Morning.
19
00:02:39,298 --> 00:02:40,298
It's 1 p.m.
20
00:02:40,299 --> 00:02:41,332
Afternoon.
21
00:02:41,333 --> 00:02:42,767
Conrad Valmont?
22
00:02:42,768 --> 00:02:44,802
Yes, it's Conrad Valmont.
23
00:02:44,803 --> 00:02:46,804
Oh, yes, Security will be there
24
00:02:46,805 --> 00:02:50,073
within the hour to escort
you from the premises.
25
00:02:50,074 --> 00:02:51,310
What?
26
00:02:53,078 --> 00:02:55,223
But I've lived here since birth.
27
00:03:04,223 --> 00:03:07,092
This is Conrad Valmont.
28
00:03:08,092 --> 00:03:10,828
Conrad was the son of a
Grecian entrepreneur
29
00:03:10,829 --> 00:03:13,197
and a Caledonian debutante.
30
00:03:13,198 --> 00:03:17,802
His father, Jean-Louis Valmont,
owned The Valmont Hotel
31
00:03:17,803 --> 00:03:20,775
as had his father and
his father before him.
32
00:03:22,489 --> 00:03:24,174
Their country home in Great Neck
33
00:03:24,175 --> 00:03:26,978
was the pantheon of summer gatherings.
34
00:03:26,979 --> 00:03:29,180
On the eve of his 51st year,
35
00:03:29,181 --> 00:03:30,882
Jean-Louis took Conrad's mother
36
00:03:30,883 --> 00:03:32,350
to the south of France
37
00:03:32,351 --> 00:03:35,186
on what was to be a weekend excursion.
38
00:03:35,187 --> 00:03:37,421
It had since turned into a lavish escapade
39
00:03:37,422 --> 00:03:41,292
around the world, lasting
nearly three decades.
40
00:03:41,293 --> 00:03:42,960
Over he subsequent years,
41
00:03:42,961 --> 00:03:45,496
Conrad was raised by The Valmont's staff.
42
00:03:45,497 --> 00:03:47,498
His chauffeur, Bernard,
43
00:03:47,499 --> 00:03:49,466
had taken Conrad to a Parisian brothel
44
00:03:49,467 --> 00:03:51,435
for his 13th birthday
45
00:03:51,436 --> 00:03:56,306
as a sort of rite of passage
into polite society.
46
00:03:56,307 --> 00:03:58,311
It was a family tradition.
47
00:03:59,311 --> 00:04:02,847
At present, he was working
on his magnum opus,
48
00:04:02,848 --> 00:04:04,149
a great New York novel
49
00:04:04,150 --> 00:04:08,052
in the tradition of
Fitzgerald and Edith Wharton.
50
00:04:08,053 --> 00:04:10,121
It was widely speculated as to where he was
51
00:04:10,122 --> 00:04:11,856
in the process of writing it.
52
00:04:11,857 --> 00:04:14,058
When asked, he would simply reply,
53
00:04:14,059 --> 00:04:15,559
I'm in the gathering stages.
54
00:04:15,560 --> 00:04:19,129
Conrad had been in the gathering stages
55
00:04:19,130 --> 00:04:21,232
for several years now.
56
00:04:21,233 --> 00:04:24,602
Last week Thursday, Conrad's
parents had capsized
57
00:04:24,603 --> 00:04:26,970
and had become stranded on a small island
58
00:04:26,971 --> 00:04:28,272
in the Mediterranean.
59
00:04:28,273 --> 00:04:30,241
Having to spend numerous days together
60
00:04:30,242 --> 00:04:32,076
without the distractions of wealth
61
00:04:32,077 --> 00:04:33,477
and a transient lifestyle,
62
00:04:33,478 --> 00:04:36,080
they've come to a simple realization,
63
00:04:36,081 --> 00:04:38,616
they didn't particularly like one another.
64
00:04:38,617 --> 00:04:41,852
Conrad's parents were to
divorce by the week's end
65
00:04:41,853 --> 00:04:43,487
and neither wanted to continue paying
66
00:04:43,488 --> 00:04:46,857
for Conrad's extravagant lifestyle.
67
00:04:46,858 --> 00:04:49,359
Hence, the Valmont board of trustees
68
00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:51,229
had requested hotel security
69
00:04:51,230 --> 00:04:55,066
to escort Conrad from
the premises by 2 p.m.
70
00:04:55,067 --> 00:04:56,299
Bunny, please make yourself useful.
71
00:04:56,300 --> 00:04:57,869
Get some more cigarettes, please.
72
00:04:57,870 --> 00:04:58,973
- Hey!
- What?
73
00:05:00,973 --> 00:05:02,206
I'm hungry.
74
00:05:03,574 --> 00:05:05,376
I'll be right there!
75
00:05:05,377 --> 00:05:06,376
Wha... I don't understand.
76
00:05:06,377 --> 00:05:07,311
What do you mean they
won't accept the charges?
77
00:05:07,312 --> 00:05:09,347
Did you tell them it was Conrad Valmont?
78
00:05:09,348 --> 00:05:10,617
Hello.
79
00:05:16,090 --> 00:05:17,354
What are you smiling at?
80
00:05:17,355 --> 00:05:18,955
Uh, nothing.
81
00:05:18,956 --> 00:05:19,957
Come on, Bunny.
82
00:05:19,958 --> 00:05:22,393
Bernard, please take us
to the Belleville Café.
83
00:05:22,394 --> 00:05:24,629
Uh, I'm sorry.
84
00:05:24,630 --> 00:05:26,935
I-I can't.
85
00:05:29,535 --> 00:05:30,869
Hey, it's me.
86
00:05:30,870 --> 00:05:32,903
I'm going to have this
sorted out in no time.
87
00:05:32,904 --> 00:05:35,507
I can't. I mean, it's orders from the boss.
88
00:05:36,507 --> 00:05:37,509
I'm sorry, Connie.
89
00:05:38,509 --> 00:05:41,179
- Can you do me a favor?
- Name it.
90
00:05:41,180 --> 00:05:43,347
Can you take care of
Napoleon while I'm gone?
91
00:05:43,348 --> 00:05:44,355
Of course.
92
00:05:44,356 --> 00:05:46,417
This is lame!
93
00:05:46,418 --> 00:05:47,652
I'm going to go.
94
00:05:47,653 --> 00:05:49,320
No, Bunny.
95
00:05:49,321 --> 00:05:51,111
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
96
00:05:52,690 --> 00:05:55,126
Listen.
97
00:05:55,127 --> 00:05:57,461
Can I borrow some cash for a cab?
98
00:05:59,264 --> 00:06:00,264
No?
99
00:06:05,237 --> 00:06:06,237
I'll be in touch.
100
00:06:12,177 --> 00:06:14,477
Conrad chose to ride the subway,
101
00:06:14,478 --> 00:06:16,246
a convention he rarely took up
102
00:06:16,247 --> 00:06:18,015
since he had learned how to hail a cab
103
00:06:18,016 --> 00:06:20,350
at the age of seven.
104
00:06:20,351 --> 00:06:21,986
But it was on this rare occasion
105
00:06:21,987 --> 00:06:24,054
that he first saw Beatrice.
106
00:06:24,055 --> 00:06:26,161
Her unassuming beauty struck him at once,
107
00:06:26,524 --> 00:06:29,660
and as his eyes gazed down,
he couldn't help but notice
108
00:06:29,661 --> 00:06:32,595
she was reading Sense and Sensibility.
109
00:06:32,596 --> 00:06:34,665
Immediately, Conrad had reasoned
110
00:06:34,666 --> 00:06:36,734
she could be no older than 19
111
00:06:36,735 --> 00:06:41,172
and would easily be molded
into a girl of his liking.
112
00:06:41,173 --> 00:06:43,273
Of course, there was
always the outside chance
113
00:06:43,274 --> 00:06:46,744
that she was merely a Jane Austin fan,
114
00:06:46,745 --> 00:06:50,317
but Conrad quickly ruled
that out on a hunch.
115
00:06:52,317 --> 00:06:54,618
Herein lies the eternal question,
116
00:06:54,619 --> 00:06:56,156
is it a grocery list...
117
00:06:58,156 --> 00:06:59,593
or her phone number?
118
00:07:02,593 --> 00:07:06,597
It was at that moment Conrad realized
119
00:07:06,598 --> 00:07:09,670
he was going to see her naked.
120
00:07:12,670 --> 00:07:15,239
I think I'm in love.
121
00:07:15,240 --> 00:07:17,741
Conrad, you've only just met her.
122
00:07:17,742 --> 00:07:19,410
I know.
123
00:07:19,411 --> 00:07:20,908
Is she attractive?
124
00:07:20,909 --> 00:07:21,946
Yes.
125
00:07:21,947 --> 00:07:24,248
You know, you have an unhealthy obsession
126
00:07:24,249 --> 00:07:26,116
with female beauty.
127
00:07:26,117 --> 00:07:27,085
I don't care.
128
00:07:27,086 --> 00:07:29,653
Maybe you should try
dating more homely women.
129
00:07:29,654 --> 00:07:30,787
I don't think so.
130
00:07:30,788 --> 00:07:31,789
Take it from me,
131
00:07:31,790 --> 00:07:35,059
someone who's been married
for 25 years, Conrad,
132
00:07:35,060 --> 00:07:38,162
inner beauty doesn't age.
133
00:07:38,163 --> 00:07:40,701
You're just saying that
because your wife is unattractive.
134
00:07:42,533 --> 00:07:44,135
- Conrad...
- Yes...
135
00:07:44,136 --> 00:07:45,602
What are you going to do?
136
00:07:45,603 --> 00:07:47,571
You have no home.
137
00:07:47,572 --> 00:07:49,407
Move in with Dylan, of course.
138
00:07:49,408 --> 00:07:50,573
How about money?
139
00:07:50,574 --> 00:07:53,376
I'd need some, thank you, yes.
140
00:07:53,377 --> 00:07:56,112
Conrad, I'm not your accountant.
141
00:07:56,113 --> 00:07:57,113
I'm your analyst.
142
00:07:57,313 --> 00:07:59,383
Well, I'm certainly not
going to travel downtown
143
00:07:59,384 --> 00:08:00,818
and work for ten hours a day
144
00:08:00,819 --> 00:08:02,321
for the best 20 years of my life
145
00:08:02,521 --> 00:08:04,422
doing some dull, unimaginative work,
146
00:08:04,423 --> 00:08:07,391
certainly non-altruistic work,
147
00:08:07,392 --> 00:08:08,392
no thanks.
148
00:08:10,127 --> 00:08:13,330
Conrad, there's an interesting case study
149
00:08:13,331 --> 00:08:15,665
a colleague of mine did a few years back.
150
00:08:15,666 --> 00:08:18,169
The subject was a young German woman
151
00:08:18,170 --> 00:08:21,272
who had been diagnosed with a brain tumor.
152
00:08:21,273 --> 00:08:24,708
It rendered her witty, charming,
153
00:08:24,709 --> 00:08:27,110
and quite likeable to most.
154
00:08:27,111 --> 00:08:28,375
You trying to set me up?
155
00:08:29,973 --> 00:08:32,816
Though she possessed all the
aforementioned attributes,
156
00:08:32,817 --> 00:08:36,119
her life was actually
completely artificial.
157
00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:39,690
She had no meaning, no emotion,
158
00:08:39,691 --> 00:08:41,459
not a care in the world.
159
00:08:41,460 --> 00:08:42,393
Hm.
160
00:08:42,394 --> 00:08:44,795
She seemed utterly blissful to an outsider,
161
00:08:44,796 --> 00:08:49,834
but her family and friends
were worried, even horrified.
162
00:08:49,835 --> 00:08:54,370
German neurologists called it witzelsucht,
163
00:08:54,371 --> 00:08:57,141
the joking disease.
164
00:08:57,142 --> 00:09:00,878
But eventually, a dissolution set in
165
00:09:00,879 --> 00:09:05,452
and her life was left empty.
166
00:09:08,452 --> 00:09:11,388
Are you saying that I have a brain tumor?
167
00:09:11,389 --> 00:09:13,456
Conrad's analyst had given Conrad
168
00:09:13,457 --> 00:09:18,829
a low-interest loan in
the amount of $217.33,
169
00:09:18,830 --> 00:09:21,500
the entirety of his wallet's remains.
170
00:09:22,500 --> 00:09:24,468
Conrad's ego was in no position
171
00:09:24,469 --> 00:09:28,538
to admit the reality of his impoverishment.
172
00:09:28,539 --> 00:09:31,774
Consequently, he had decided
not to tell Dylan...
173
00:09:31,775 --> 00:09:32,843
Ding-dong.
174
00:09:32,844 --> 00:09:34,411
... Or anyone, for that matter,
175
00:09:34,412 --> 00:09:35,716
of his financial woes.
176
00:09:38,716 --> 00:09:39,883
Bonjour, comrade.
177
00:09:39,884 --> 00:09:41,284
Bonjour.
178
00:09:41,285 --> 00:09:43,620
This is Dylan Tate.
179
00:09:43,621 --> 00:09:46,223
Dylan was an antisocial socialist,
180
00:09:46,224 --> 00:09:50,326
a closet conversationalist,
a clinical neurotic.
181
00:09:50,327 --> 00:09:53,430
Possessing an inimitable
talent for the arts,
182
00:09:53,431 --> 00:09:55,266
Dylan had been afforded the opportunity
183
00:09:55,267 --> 00:09:57,801
to travel the world and live
a comfortable lifestyle
184
00:09:57,802 --> 00:10:00,303
at his own expense,
185
00:10:00,304 --> 00:10:02,508
something Conrad knew nothing about.
186
00:10:03,508 --> 00:10:05,341
Dylan Tate was the only personage
187
00:10:05,342 --> 00:10:08,745
of all Conrad's acquaintances
whom he admired,
188
00:10:08,746 --> 00:10:10,648
and to a bigger extent
189
00:10:10,649 --> 00:10:15,451
than he liked to admit to himself and me.
190
00:10:15,452 --> 00:10:16,553
How was Greece?
191
00:10:16,554 --> 00:10:18,888
- You mean Bhutan.
- Semantics.
192
00:10:18,889 --> 00:10:20,324
I got back a couple of days ago.
193
00:10:20,524 --> 00:10:22,459
Uh-hm.
194
00:10:22,460 --> 00:10:24,394
Do you mind if I stay with you for a while?
195
00:10:24,395 --> 00:10:26,870
Sure, come on in.
196
00:10:32,870 --> 00:10:35,471
So, what happened?
197
00:10:35,472 --> 00:10:38,709
We are remodeling at The Valmont again.
198
00:10:38,710 --> 00:10:40,643
Where's Jocelyn?
199
00:10:40,644 --> 00:10:41,644
I don't know.
200
00:10:41,645 --> 00:10:43,747
Ugh, it's been a couple of weeks.
201
00:10:43,748 --> 00:10:46,316
What I first perceived
as cute and endearing
202
00:10:46,317 --> 00:10:49,586
was actually quite exhausting,
203
00:10:49,587 --> 00:10:52,455
her episodic hysteria, her
chronic dissatisfaction,
204
00:10:52,456 --> 00:10:53,856
her endless pragmatism.
205
00:10:53,857 --> 00:10:55,426
You know you two always do this, right?
206
00:10:55,427 --> 00:10:57,427
One of you screams,
the other one comes running back.
207
00:10:57,428 --> 00:10:58,829
I-I bought her a Volvo.
208
00:10:58,830 --> 00:11:02,700
You bought her a Vol,
why, why do you always buy them a Volvo?
209
00:11:02,701 --> 00:11:03,497
I don't know.
210
00:11:03,501 --> 00:11:05,569
It's like a free ticket to leave.
211
00:11:05,570 --> 00:11:07,673
How can I feel guilty, you know?
212
00:11:09,673 --> 00:11:11,244
I bought her a Volvo.
213
00:11:11,844 --> 00:11:13,310
You know what really pisses me off
214
00:11:13,510 --> 00:11:14,945
about this whole thing is that I'm the one
215
00:11:14,946 --> 00:11:17,547
who funded her entire vegan fashion line,
216
00:11:17,548 --> 00:11:19,749
and now that every socialite in St. Bart's
217
00:11:19,750 --> 00:11:22,720
thinks it's fashionable,
I get the swift kick.
218
00:11:22,721 --> 00:11:25,195
Swift kick? I thought you
broke it off with her.
219
00:11:26,991 --> 00:11:29,326
I did but still.
220
00:11:29,327 --> 00:11:32,763
So, Henri, over at the gallery,
221
00:11:32,764 --> 00:11:34,731
he set me up on a date last week.
222
00:11:34,732 --> 00:11:35,800
That bad, huh?
223
00:11:35,801 --> 00:11:37,433
You can always tell what
somebody thinks of you
224
00:11:37,434 --> 00:11:39,802
by who they set you up with.
225
00:11:39,803 --> 00:11:42,751
Is it wrong to be aroused by
a bunch of 17-year-old girls
226
00:11:43,508 --> 00:11:46,643
running around with knee-high
socks and polyester shorts?
227
00:11:46,644 --> 00:11:47,778
Well, I guess that's a decision
228
00:11:47,779 --> 00:11:49,479
every man has to make for himself,
229
00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:52,282
but yes, obviously yes.
230
00:11:52,283 --> 00:11:53,584
Conrad needs a girlfriend.
231
00:11:53,585 --> 00:11:55,319
No, no, no. We don't need girlfriends.
232
00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:56,653
This is not the time for girlfriends.
233
00:11:56,654 --> 00:11:58,821
This is a time for us to read and to write
234
00:11:58,822 --> 00:12:02,692
and to have deviant fetishistic
sex with prostitutes.
235
00:12:02,693 --> 00:12:04,994
Please, this from a serial monogamist.
236
00:12:04,995 --> 00:12:07,464
You've never even been with a prostitute.
237
00:12:07,465 --> 00:12:09,399
I understand that, if you'll indulge me.
238
00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:10,566
I'm going through a rough break-up.
239
00:12:10,567 --> 00:12:12,069
I need to have certain...
240
00:12:12,070 --> 00:12:14,872
reassurances about the
prospect of bachelorhood.
241
00:12:14,873 --> 00:12:15,973
Look alive, look alive.
242
00:12:15,974 --> 00:12:17,574
Need a new goalie?
243
00:12:17,575 --> 00:12:18,675
Don't make eye contact.
244
00:12:18,676 --> 00:12:20,610
Hey, mister, give us back our ball.
245
00:12:20,611 --> 00:12:22,312
Interaction is inappropriate.
246
00:12:22,313 --> 00:12:23,980
I can play.
247
00:12:23,981 --> 00:12:24,981
Hm. We should move.
248
00:12:27,652 --> 00:12:28,855
Like little veal.
249
00:12:30,855 --> 00:12:32,755
So, I met a woman a couple weeks ago.
250
00:12:32,756 --> 00:12:35,058
I don't know, I can't
get her out of my head.
251
00:12:35,059 --> 00:12:36,759
What happened to the
prospects of bachelorhood?
252
00:12:36,760 --> 00:12:39,062
I know. I just find it completely
253
00:12:39,063 --> 00:12:40,958
overwhelmingly tedious and unnerving.
254
00:12:42,801 --> 00:12:44,335
So, tell me about the girl.
255
00:12:44,336 --> 00:12:45,202
What are the details?
256
00:12:45,203 --> 00:12:47,604
She's like an ingenue in a Chekov play.
257
00:12:47,605 --> 00:12:49,940
You know, one of those awfully
romantic virtuous types,
258
00:12:49,941 --> 00:12:52,475
completely self-inhibited, doesn't drink.
259
00:12:52,476 --> 00:12:54,513
Didn't have sex until she was 21,
260
00:12:55,513 --> 00:12:57,580
read the bulk of the Victorian classics.
261
00:12:57,581 --> 00:12:59,416
Jesus, sounds like a real keeper.
262
00:12:59,417 --> 00:13:00,718
Oh, she is, she really is.
263
00:13:00,719 --> 00:13:02,952
I'm... I'm way over my head.
264
00:13:02,953 --> 00:13:05,055
Is she attractive?
265
00:13:05,056 --> 00:13:07,358
Hm, she's a model.
266
00:13:07,359 --> 00:13:10,728
If I ever lost my fortune
267
00:13:10,729 --> 00:13:14,031
and was completely disinherited,
could you ever see me
268
00:13:14,032 --> 00:13:16,933
as a struggling bohemian artist type,
269
00:13:16,934 --> 00:13:18,724
hypothetically speaking, of course?
270
00:13:20,504 --> 00:13:21,638
That reminds me,
271
00:13:21,639 --> 00:13:23,040
do you want to come with
me to the cocktail benefit
272
00:13:23,041 --> 00:13:25,642
at the Woodruff Modern tonight?
273
00:13:25,643 --> 00:13:27,009
- Nope.
- Come on.
274
00:13:27,010 --> 00:13:28,144
You know I don't like those things.
275
00:13:28,145 --> 00:13:29,146
It'll be fun. You can...
276
00:13:29,147 --> 00:13:30,013
Probably not.
277
00:13:30,014 --> 00:13:32,449
Then you can, uh, meet the ingenue.
278
00:13:32,450 --> 00:13:33,550
Is it a date?
279
00:13:33,551 --> 00:13:34,651
Not exactly.
280
00:13:34,652 --> 00:13:36,920
We do this thing where we
don't really go out together.
281
00:13:36,921 --> 00:13:37,720
We just call each other
282
00:13:37,721 --> 00:13:38,654
to make sure the other is going to be
283
00:13:38,655 --> 00:13:40,990
at a certain place at a preordained time,
284
00:13:40,991 --> 00:13:42,255
- and then...
- Adorable.
285
00:13:42,527 --> 00:13:45,495
...we just happen to bump into one another.
286
00:13:45,496 --> 00:13:47,130
It's less pressure.
287
00:13:47,131 --> 00:13:49,399
So do you want to come
to the cocktail party?
288
00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:51,639
Well, I'll need a cocktail first.
289
00:13:54,639 --> 00:13:57,007
Are you wearing perfume?
290
00:13:57,008 --> 00:13:59,542
No, it's a new cologne that
I'm wearing for my date.
291
00:13:59,543 --> 00:14:00,701
Why? What do you think?
292
00:14:02,247 --> 00:14:04,114
Well, I think it smells like perfume.
293
00:14:04,115 --> 00:14:06,888
No, the woman at Bergdorf's
told me that it's unisex.
294
00:14:09,888 --> 00:14:12,099
And you wanted to smell sexually ambiguous?
295
00:14:16,693 --> 00:14:19,532
Good evening and welcome
to this evening's benefit.
296
00:14:20,532 --> 00:14:22,599
I must say I'm more than thrilled
297
00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:25,201
to see so many familiar faces.
298
00:14:25,202 --> 00:14:28,739
Enjoy the complimentary hors
d'oeuvres and champagne,
299
00:14:28,740 --> 00:14:31,675
and remember, make a donation.
300
00:14:31,676 --> 00:14:33,615
Cheers!
301
00:14:37,615 --> 00:14:40,153
This is Beatrice Fairbanks.
302
00:14:42,098 --> 00:14:44,888
Beatrice had attended a rather
strict etiquette school
303
00:14:44,889 --> 00:14:46,757
on a bi-weekly basis.
304
00:14:46,758 --> 00:14:49,893
In doing so, Beatrice had
been quietly instilled
305
00:14:49,894 --> 00:14:53,095
with a certain Victorian idolatry,
306
00:14:53,096 --> 00:14:56,667
a paragon of virtue.
307
00:14:56,668 --> 00:14:58,701
Beatrice had been forced at a young age
308
00:14:58,702 --> 00:15:01,037
to learn the works of Bach, Chopin,
309
00:15:01,038 --> 00:15:04,074
and other masters of classical music,
310
00:15:04,075 --> 00:15:07,677
though secretly she'd
always wanted to play jazz.
311
00:15:07,678 --> 00:15:11,816
Oddly, Beatrice had opted to
become and editorial model...
312
00:15:13,918 --> 00:15:17,186
...an occupation that only
heightened her insecurities.
313
00:15:17,187 --> 00:15:18,187
C'est magnifique!
314
00:15:18,188 --> 00:15:19,657
Un petite oiseau.
315
00:15:24,355 --> 00:15:25,829
Beatrice was a firm believer
316
00:15:25,830 --> 00:15:28,798
in mystics, psychics, and the occult,
317
00:15:28,799 --> 00:15:31,201
which ran counter to the debutante norm
318
00:15:31,202 --> 00:15:35,272
which favored incessant psychoanalysis.
319
00:15:35,273 --> 00:15:36,940
What does it mean?
320
00:15:36,941 --> 00:15:40,076
So what do you think of my cologne?
321
00:15:40,077 --> 00:15:42,045
Oh, that's you.
322
00:15:42,046 --> 00:15:43,880
You probably didn't get a good...
323
00:15:43,881 --> 00:15:45,615
It's a little feminine.
324
00:15:45,616 --> 00:15:48,085
The woman at Bergdorf's
told me it was unisex.
325
00:15:48,086 --> 00:15:50,119
Hi, she was clearly lying.
326
00:15:50,120 --> 00:15:51,754
He smells pretty, doesn't he?
327
00:15:51,755 --> 00:15:56,627
Um, Beatrice, this is my friend Conrad.
328
00:15:56,628 --> 00:15:58,629
Conrad, Beatrice.
329
00:15:58,630 --> 00:16:00,596
- We've met.
- Just briefly.
330
00:16:00,597 --> 00:16:02,666
- On the subway.
- Subway?
331
00:16:02,667 --> 00:16:04,634
Uh-hm. I gave him my, um...
332
00:16:04,635 --> 00:16:07,604
Scarf, she gave me her scarf. It was cold.
333
00:16:07,605 --> 00:16:08,971
I'm going to need that back from you.
334
00:16:08,972 --> 00:16:11,774
Okay. I'll give it to you.
335
00:16:11,775 --> 00:16:12,975
Uh-hm.
336
00:16:12,976 --> 00:16:14,043
I can get it...
337
00:16:14,044 --> 00:16:16,312
from you... to give to her.
338
00:16:16,313 --> 00:16:20,117
I think I see foie gras.
339
00:16:20,118 --> 00:16:21,918
Want some... duck?
340
00:16:21,919 --> 00:16:26,322
No. Take your time.
341
00:16:26,323 --> 00:16:27,824
He's... That's so nice of you.
342
00:16:27,825 --> 00:16:29,292
Obviously I've got a target on my back.
343
00:16:29,293 --> 00:16:31,795
I didn't even know it,
I didn't even know it,
344
00:16:31,796 --> 00:16:33,095
and listen to this,
345
00:16:33,096 --> 00:16:35,965
my mistress says she
doesn't want to have sex
346
00:16:35,966 --> 00:16:37,633
because she's afraid she'll get pregnant.
347
00:16:37,634 --> 00:16:39,635
I told her at the rate we have intercourse,
348
00:16:39,636 --> 00:16:40,637
the only way that's going to happen
349
00:16:40,638 --> 00:16:42,572
is through immaculate conception.
350
00:16:42,573 --> 00:16:43,773
Hm-hm.
351
00:16:43,774 --> 00:16:45,242
Didn't you say she was on the pill?
352
00:16:45,243 --> 00:16:46,042
Yeah, yeah, she is,
353
00:16:46,043 --> 00:16:47,911
but she says she's afraid of the 1%,
354
00:16:47,912 --> 00:16:50,047
and besides, she wants to get off.
355
00:16:50,048 --> 00:16:51,614
It gives her mood swings.
356
00:16:51,615 --> 00:16:52,648
Awful, just awful.
357
00:16:52,649 --> 00:16:53,318
You already have a wife
358
00:16:53,518 --> 00:16:55,819
that doesn't want to sleep with you.
359
00:16:55,820 --> 00:16:58,155
Touché.
360
00:17:00,758 --> 00:17:04,060
Don't you find that the virtuous ideals
361
00:17:04,061 --> 00:17:06,262
of the Victorian authors
is somewhat unrealistic
362
00:17:06,263 --> 00:17:07,230
and sentimental?
363
00:17:07,231 --> 00:17:10,701
No, not at all, and as the century went on,
364
00:17:10,702 --> 00:17:13,604
the scope of the genre
became far more complex.
365
00:17:13,605 --> 00:17:16,206
You do realize that the monicker
of Victorian literature
366
00:17:16,207 --> 00:17:19,675
ranges from the Bronte sisters to Kipling?
367
00:17:19,676 --> 00:17:21,243
Yes.
368
00:17:21,244 --> 00:17:23,913
Have you ever actually
read any of their books?
369
00:17:23,914 --> 00:17:26,216
No, but I'm...
370
00:17:26,217 --> 00:17:28,819
I'm heavily considering it.
371
00:17:31,189 --> 00:17:32,789
She wouldn't have left...
372
00:17:38,630 --> 00:17:39,700
There she is.
373
00:17:42,700 --> 00:17:43,933
Hey.
374
00:17:43,934 --> 00:17:45,335
Hi.
375
00:17:45,336 --> 00:17:48,070
So, where... where you heading now?
376
00:17:48,071 --> 00:17:49,772
I have to go to bed. I
have work in the morning.
377
00:17:49,773 --> 00:17:51,141
Yeah, me too.
378
00:17:51,142 --> 00:17:54,044
So, what are you working on these days?
379
00:17:54,045 --> 00:17:55,778
Nothing in particular.
380
00:17:55,779 --> 00:17:56,880
I'm open to new ideas.
381
00:17:56,881 --> 00:17:58,382
You sound very ambitious.
382
00:17:58,383 --> 00:18:00,984
Actually I am in the
gathering stages of a novel.
383
00:18:03,054 --> 00:18:06,088
It is to be one of the
great New York novels
384
00:18:06,089 --> 00:18:09,925
in the tradition of
Fitzgerald, Edith Wharton.
385
00:18:09,926 --> 00:18:11,961
He's been in the gathering
stages for over a decade.
386
00:18:11,962 --> 00:18:13,396
Well, all good things take time.
387
00:18:13,397 --> 00:18:15,065
I rushed my first novel,
388
00:18:15,066 --> 00:18:16,767
I don't want to suffer the same pitfalls
389
00:18:16,768 --> 00:18:19,870
as my predecessors with
my sophomore effort.
390
00:18:19,871 --> 00:18:21,337
I don't think you finished your first novel
391
00:18:21,338 --> 00:18:22,806
and I'm pretty sure it can't qualify
392
00:18:22,807 --> 00:18:23,940
as a sophomore effort
393
00:18:23,941 --> 00:18:26,008
if you don't finish your first book.
394
00:18:26,009 --> 00:18:27,277
Finish it.
395
00:18:27,278 --> 00:18:30,814
Nonetheless, everybody knows
that there are certain pitfalls
396
00:18:30,815 --> 00:18:32,149
associated with a sophomore effort
397
00:18:32,150 --> 00:18:36,752
that I simply want to avoid, period.
398
00:18:36,753 --> 00:18:37,854
Avoid it by not doing it.
399
00:18:37,855 --> 00:18:39,389
Dylan.
400
00:18:39,390 --> 00:18:43,093
Well, good night.
401
00:18:43,094 --> 00:18:44,102
Good night.
402
00:18:51,102 --> 00:18:52,313
Don't you try anything.
403
00:18:54,271 --> 00:18:55,739
I won't.
404
00:18:55,740 --> 00:18:57,375
Don't try anything.
405
00:18:58,375 --> 00:18:59,815
I won't.
406
00:19:03,815 --> 00:19:04,815
- Don't.
- I...
407
00:19:11,756 --> 00:19:13,890
Nearly 30 minutes had passed,
408
00:19:13,891 --> 00:19:15,459
and Beatrice could still feel the rush
409
00:19:15,460 --> 00:19:17,864
from Conrad's flirtation.
410
00:19:19,864 --> 00:19:21,797
Don't try anything.
411
00:19:21,798 --> 00:19:24,133
I won't.
412
00:19:24,134 --> 00:19:25,802
Not this one.
413
00:19:25,803 --> 00:19:30,442
Dylan... I won't.
414
00:19:41,419 --> 00:19:42,885
Don't try anything.
415
00:19:42,886 --> 00:19:45,090
I won't!
416
00:19:47,090 --> 00:19:49,092
The two friends' competitive nature
417
00:19:49,093 --> 00:19:51,995
which had spanned nearly three decades
418
00:19:51,996 --> 00:19:53,797
stemmed from the simple fact
419
00:19:53,798 --> 00:19:56,165
that they each not only envied the other
420
00:19:56,166 --> 00:19:59,471
but wanted secretly to be the other.
421
00:20:01,471 --> 00:20:04,211
Neither one ever spoke of this.
422
00:20:08,012 --> 00:20:10,012
You know, just because you're almost 40
423
00:20:10,013 --> 00:20:12,181
and still getting a weekly
allowance from your parents
424
00:20:12,182 --> 00:20:14,084
doesn't mean you can just do nothing
425
00:20:14,085 --> 00:20:16,023
for the rest of your life.
426
00:20:20,023 --> 00:20:24,161
First of all, I'm writing a
novel, as you well know.
427
00:20:24,162 --> 00:20:26,896
Secondly, your statement
is completely subjective
428
00:20:26,897 --> 00:20:29,199
and lacking any substantive facts.
429
00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:32,368
You're walking down a very
dangerous road, my friend.
430
00:20:32,369 --> 00:20:33,903
What road is that?
431
00:20:33,904 --> 00:20:37,039
The road to fantasyland,
432
00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:38,941
and when you take a trip to fantasyland,
433
00:20:38,942 --> 00:20:41,377
you should always have a return ticket.
434
00:20:41,378 --> 00:20:42,945
I don't even know what that means.
435
00:20:42,946 --> 00:20:44,114
At some point you're going to have to come
436
00:20:44,115 --> 00:20:47,150
to the same realization I did.
437
00:20:47,151 --> 00:20:48,218
What's that?
438
00:20:48,219 --> 00:20:51,488
The rest of the world is
never going to love you
439
00:20:51,489 --> 00:20:53,160
as much as your parents do.
440
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:58,894
Weren't you adopted?
441
00:20:58,895 --> 00:21:01,498
I don't understand why you're
interested in this guy.
442
00:21:01,499 --> 00:21:04,934
He's just another
philandering affluent type
443
00:21:04,935 --> 00:21:08,104
doomed to chronic alcoholism,
perpetual adolescence,
444
00:21:08,105 --> 00:21:10,074
and death by syphilis.
445
00:21:10,774 --> 00:21:13,309
He probably sits around all
day drinking Tom Collins
446
00:21:13,310 --> 00:21:16,345
and just performing acts
of mental masturbation.
447
00:21:16,346 --> 00:21:18,294
That is such an unfair generalization.
448
00:21:18,494 --> 00:21:19,317
He's not like that.
449
00:21:19,517 --> 00:21:21,852
For your information,
he is writing a novel.
450
00:21:21,853 --> 00:21:24,387
Oh. Aren't we all?
451
00:21:25,478 --> 00:21:28,057
So, I'm thinking about
taking it to the next level
452
00:21:28,058 --> 00:21:29,093
with Beatrice,
453
00:21:29,094 --> 00:21:31,228
and actually asking her
out to dinner tonight.
454
00:21:31,229 --> 00:21:33,630
Hm, bad move.
455
00:21:33,631 --> 00:21:35,565
- Why?
- You just saw her last night.
456
00:21:35,566 --> 00:21:38,034
You don't want to crowd her,
make her think you're too eager.
457
00:21:38,035 --> 00:21:39,970
Definitely wait.
458
00:21:39,971 --> 00:21:42,204
How long?
459
00:21:42,205 --> 00:21:43,306
I don't know, Dylan.
460
00:21:43,307 --> 00:21:44,441
A day at least.
461
00:21:44,442 --> 00:21:45,706
- Really?
- Yeah, really.
462
00:21:47,644 --> 00:21:48,647
Beatrice...
463
00:21:50,647 --> 00:21:51,951
yes, that's my plane.
464
00:21:53,551 --> 00:21:56,052
I never understood why someone
would want to be a vegetarian.
465
00:21:56,053 --> 00:21:58,321
I mean, do you, do you really
love animals that much.
466
00:21:58,521 --> 00:22:00,191
No, no, no. I just hate plants.
467
00:22:01,659 --> 00:22:03,460
You eat fish though, right?
468
00:22:03,461 --> 00:22:04,460
Why?
469
00:22:04,461 --> 00:22:06,095
All the vegetarians eat fish.
470
00:22:06,096 --> 00:22:07,663
Well, I'm a Pisces.
471
00:22:07,664 --> 00:22:09,365
What's that got to do with it?
472
00:22:09,366 --> 00:22:11,170
I don't eat my own kind.
473
00:22:13,112 --> 00:22:15,639
Beatrice, tell me, what
is it like being a model,
474
00:22:15,640 --> 00:22:17,473
all those people staring at you?
475
00:22:17,474 --> 00:22:20,643
It's like any other job,
innocuous and demoralizing,
476
00:22:20,644 --> 00:22:21,324
but it pays well.
477
00:22:21,445 --> 00:22:22,579
I'm serious. Tell me about yourself.
478
00:22:22,580 --> 00:22:25,915
All I know is that you, you,
you do frequent the subway,
479
00:22:25,916 --> 00:22:27,249
and, and you read Victorian
480
00:22:27,250 --> 00:22:29,920
and pre-Victorian literature, right?
481
00:22:29,921 --> 00:22:32,055
Come on, I want to know, I
want to know your fears.
482
00:22:32,056 --> 00:22:33,422
I'd like to know your hopes.
483
00:22:33,423 --> 00:22:35,392
I want to know political ideologies
484
00:22:35,393 --> 00:22:36,327
and sexual preference.
485
00:22:36,527 --> 00:22:37,760
I don't care what order.
486
00:22:37,761 --> 00:22:40,195
That's a lot of information
for a first date.
487
00:22:40,196 --> 00:22:41,264
That's true.
488
00:22:41,265 --> 00:22:42,531
How about you?
489
00:22:42,532 --> 00:22:45,235
What is it like being born with
the proverbial silver spoon?
490
00:22:45,236 --> 00:22:46,202
All right.
491
00:22:46,203 --> 00:22:49,271
Well, you know, it, it
is like any other job,
492
00:22:49,272 --> 00:22:52,409
it's innocuous and demoralizing,
but it pays really well.
493
00:22:52,410 --> 00:22:54,243
Beatrice was different.
494
00:22:54,244 --> 00:22:56,345
As their conversation continued,
495
00:22:56,346 --> 00:23:00,383
the two spoke of French cinema
and classic literature.
496
00:23:00,384 --> 00:23:03,252
He tried to be witty, to make her laugh,
497
00:23:03,253 --> 00:23:06,155
and for a moment she resembled a statue,
498
00:23:06,156 --> 00:23:07,556
a bust of an Aphrodite
499
00:23:07,557 --> 00:23:10,993
that he could only remember its gentle eyes
500
00:23:10,994 --> 00:23:15,065
but not where the status itself had been.
501
00:23:15,066 --> 00:23:16,466
Shall we go have a cigarette?
502
00:23:16,467 --> 00:23:18,535
Okay, yeah.
503
00:23:18,536 --> 00:23:20,170
Conrad often became attached
504
00:23:20,171 --> 00:23:23,105
to the idea of something
505
00:23:23,106 --> 00:23:26,710
and not to the actual thing itself.
506
00:23:26,711 --> 00:23:30,012
So what is your novel about?
507
00:23:30,013 --> 00:23:30,814
I'm not so sure.
508
00:23:30,815 --> 00:23:32,015
I'm still figuring that part out.
509
00:23:32,016 --> 00:23:33,682
I want you to try this.
510
00:23:33,683 --> 00:23:34,323
Why? What is it?
511
00:23:34,518 --> 00:23:38,488
This is, it's a Valmont Executive.
512
00:23:38,489 --> 00:23:40,190
It is my family's brand.
513
00:23:40,191 --> 00:23:41,658
It is, it is only the rarest
514
00:23:41,659 --> 00:23:44,995
and most exquisite cigarette in existence.
515
00:23:44,996 --> 00:23:46,632
It is pretty great, isn't it?
516
00:23:48,632 --> 00:23:51,104
Sort of tastes like any other cigarette.
517
00:23:53,104 --> 00:23:54,537
How about the smell, right?
518
00:23:54,538 --> 00:23:56,405
Smell?
519
00:23:56,406 --> 00:23:58,141
Smells like any other too.
520
00:23:58,142 --> 00:24:01,277
- I mean, maybe I'm missing...
- ...something.
521
00:24:01,278 --> 00:24:03,113
You don't get it. You just don't get it.
522
00:24:03,114 --> 00:24:05,047
I'm going to take two then.
523
00:24:05,048 --> 00:24:06,649
Oh, that's good.
524
00:24:06,650 --> 00:24:07,650
That's healthy.
525
00:24:09,252 --> 00:24:10,754
As the day wore on,
526
00:24:10,755 --> 00:24:12,523
Beatrice was playing hard to get.
527
00:24:13,523 --> 00:24:18,260
Conrad's pseudo-intellectual
banter was wearing thin,
528
00:24:18,261 --> 00:24:20,665
and so he decided to proceed to plan B,
529
00:24:22,665 --> 00:24:24,566
get her drunk.
530
00:24:24,567 --> 00:24:25,768
Well, I know you don't drink,
531
00:24:25,769 --> 00:24:28,138
but they make an incredible
Tom Collins, okay?
532
00:24:28,506 --> 00:24:30,105
How often do you come here?
533
00:24:30,106 --> 00:24:32,107
Uh, every once in a while.
534
00:24:32,108 --> 00:24:34,115
Here you go, Mr. Valmont.
535
00:24:39,115 --> 00:24:40,182
Lucky.
536
00:24:40,183 --> 00:24:41,183
Cheers.
537
00:24:41,184 --> 00:24:42,184
Cheers.
538
00:24:52,128 --> 00:24:55,065
Weird how nobody dances anymore, you know?
539
00:24:55,066 --> 00:24:58,471
That's funny coming from
someone who is not dancing.
540
00:25:00,471 --> 00:25:02,105
I don't dance.
541
00:26:22,886 --> 00:26:26,355
You know, you're nothing
like Dylan described.
542
00:26:26,356 --> 00:26:27,325
Why? What did he say?
543
00:26:27,525 --> 00:26:28,557
He said you were self-inhibited
544
00:26:28,558 --> 00:26:29,593
and that you didn't drink.
545
00:26:29,594 --> 00:26:34,297
Well, a woman can wear many hats.
546
00:26:34,298 --> 00:26:35,797
Oh yeah, what does that mean?
547
00:26:35,798 --> 00:26:37,267
It means a woman can be
548
00:26:37,268 --> 00:26:39,402
inhibited and conservative with one man
549
00:26:39,403 --> 00:26:43,806
and virtually the opposite with another.
550
00:26:43,807 --> 00:26:47,442
Oh boy, even socialist regimes
wait until their demise
551
00:26:47,443 --> 00:26:50,646
before they admit such insincerity.
552
00:26:50,647 --> 00:26:55,354
Well, I'm not a socialist
regime, I'm a woman.
553
00:26:57,354 --> 00:26:58,587
You play that thing?
554
00:26:58,588 --> 00:26:59,922
A little bit.
555
00:26:59,923 --> 00:27:00,923
Will you play me a song?
556
00:27:00,924 --> 00:27:01,924
- No.
- Come on.
557
00:27:01,925 --> 00:27:02,925
- Uh-uh.
- Please!
558
00:27:04,627 --> 00:27:06,530
- Beatrice.
- I'm not in the mood.
559
00:27:07,130 --> 00:27:08,331
Are you going to make me beg?
560
00:27:08,531 --> 00:27:10,600
No. Maybe.
561
00:27:10,601 --> 00:27:11,934
Come on, please?
562
00:27:11,935 --> 00:27:14,704
Just one.
563
00:28:09,534 --> 00:28:10,692
Beatrice loved the way
564
00:28:10,693 --> 00:28:13,863
Conrad walked into a room,
565
00:28:13,864 --> 00:28:15,832
the way he waved his hands in the air
566
00:28:15,833 --> 00:28:19,469
every time he heard Bach, the
way he read her excerpts
567
00:28:19,470 --> 00:28:22,604
of Fitzgerald's short fiction before bed,
568
00:28:22,605 --> 00:28:25,575
the precision with which
he made a Tom Collins
569
00:28:25,576 --> 00:28:29,278
and a single Windsor knot,
570
00:28:29,279 --> 00:28:31,847
his infallible wit and charm
571
00:28:31,848 --> 00:28:35,585
and the way he used words
like haberdashery,
572
00:28:35,586 --> 00:28:37,819
but most importantly,
573
00:28:37,820 --> 00:28:40,859
Beatrice loved the way he looked at her.
574
00:28:42,859 --> 00:28:46,328
Conrad loved the way
Beatrice walked into a room,
575
00:28:46,329 --> 00:28:47,489
how she laughed at his jokes
576
00:28:47,530 --> 00:28:50,501
no matter how convoluted
or juvenile they seemed,
577
00:28:51,424 --> 00:28:52,635
the way she bit her lip
578
00:28:52,636 --> 00:28:55,305
the moment before she played the piano,
579
00:28:55,306 --> 00:28:59,308
the softness of her skin,
the yellow in her eyes,
580
00:28:59,309 --> 00:29:04,079
the mole on her thigh,
but most importantly,
581
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:06,719
Conrad loved to look at her.
582
00:29:08,719 --> 00:29:13,556
Unfortunately, there were still
two unavoidable problems,
583
00:29:13,557 --> 00:29:18,594
Dylan, and that Conrad was broke,
584
00:29:18,595 --> 00:29:24,566
but most importantly that he
was lying concerning both.
585
00:29:24,567 --> 00:29:25,934
Did you ever notice that
when people become happy,
586
00:29:25,935 --> 00:29:28,570
they pack on a few extra pounds?
587
00:29:28,571 --> 00:29:30,373
What are you trying to say?
588
00:29:30,374 --> 00:29:32,107
No, no, no, nothing about you, Angel.
589
00:29:32,108 --> 00:29:34,410
No, no, no.
I'm just, I'm making an observation.
590
00:29:34,411 --> 00:29:35,644
Oh.
591
00:29:35,645 --> 00:29:38,547
Are you saying that all
fat people are happy?
592
00:29:38,548 --> 00:29:40,048
Not at all, no.
593
00:29:40,049 --> 00:29:41,049
I'm merely stating
594
00:29:41,050 --> 00:29:42,919
that there are two
categories of fat people,
595
00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:48,558
there is happy fat and there is just fat.
596
00:29:49,792 --> 00:29:51,493
- No, no, no. Please.
- Just one.
597
00:29:51,494 --> 00:29:52,562
Just give me a little space.
598
00:29:52,563 --> 00:29:54,730
I'm trying to cook, you
know, it's not natural.
599
00:29:54,731 --> 00:29:56,431
Hey. That water is brown.
600
00:29:56,432 --> 00:29:58,101
That can't be healthy.
601
00:29:58,102 --> 00:29:59,208
That's how I like it.
602
00:29:59,408 --> 00:30:00,442
- Really?
- Yep.
603
00:30:00,642 --> 00:30:03,005
- Want me to get that?
- Nope.
604
00:30:03,006 --> 00:30:05,040
Well, how am I supposed to wash my hands?
605
00:30:05,041 --> 00:30:06,075
There's egg all over them.
606
00:30:06,076 --> 00:30:07,076
Hey, Dylan.
607
00:30:08,779 --> 00:30:11,681
Uh, no, not doing anything.
608
00:30:11,682 --> 00:30:13,415
Oh, tonight?
609
00:30:13,416 --> 00:30:18,921
Uh, oh, oh, can you hang on one second?
610
00:30:18,922 --> 00:30:20,487
He wants to take me to the theater tonight
611
00:30:20,687 --> 00:30:22,177
and he wants me to bring a date for you.
612
00:30:22,526 --> 00:30:24,393
I'm, I'm not that good of a liar.
613
00:30:24,394 --> 00:30:26,129
I sincerely doubt that.
614
00:30:26,130 --> 00:30:30,066
No, I'm sorry, we can't... I can't.
615
00:30:30,067 --> 00:30:32,567
You did?
Oh, that's so nice of you.
616
00:30:32,568 --> 00:30:35,438
Okay, well then, I'll see you at 7.
617
00:30:35,439 --> 00:30:37,038
Okay, bye.
618
00:30:37,039 --> 00:30:38,909
There was nothing I could do.
619
00:30:42,980 --> 00:30:43,980
This is a bad idea.
620
00:30:45,549 --> 00:30:47,850
I don't understand why you and Dylan
621
00:30:47,851 --> 00:30:51,687
always have to get into these
prepubescent competitions
622
00:30:51,688 --> 00:30:53,722
of which he always loses.
623
00:30:53,723 --> 00:30:55,289
I resent that.
You know, I make a conscious effort
624
00:30:55,489 --> 00:30:56,558
to stay out of all forms
of competition with him.
625
00:30:56,559 --> 00:31:00,462
Well, you're uh, track
record proves otherwise.
626
00:31:00,463 --> 00:31:04,467
Well, this girl is important.
627
00:31:04,468 --> 00:31:08,004
Let me know if there's
anything I can, um, I can do.
628
00:31:08,005 --> 00:31:10,739
Have you heard anything?
I can't get anyone to return my calls.
629
00:31:10,740 --> 00:31:12,297
There are rumors, just rumors.
630
00:31:12,497 --> 00:31:14,210
I don't want to get into details,
631
00:31:14,211 --> 00:31:17,680
but I've only got 36 hours
of clean underwear left.
632
00:31:17,681 --> 00:31:19,147
I've got no idea what to do, you know?
633
00:31:19,148 --> 00:31:22,218
I feel like Napoleon after Waterloo,
634
00:31:22,219 --> 00:31:25,020
dying in exile on the coast of St. Helena.
635
00:31:25,021 --> 00:31:26,823
It's going to be all right, Connie.
636
00:31:26,824 --> 00:31:27,790
You think?
637
00:31:27,791 --> 00:31:30,559
I promise you. It's going to be all right.
638
00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:32,095
All right.
639
00:31:45,443 --> 00:31:46,747
Listen, I need to take the antiques.
640
00:31:46,947 --> 00:31:48,178
You don't need to take everything.
641
00:31:48,179 --> 00:31:49,979
They were in my family,
and they belong to me.
642
00:31:49,980 --> 00:31:51,747
Your family, your family, I paid...
643
00:31:51,748 --> 00:31:53,915
That desk was from Marie Antoinette!
644
00:31:53,916 --> 00:31:54,916
Oh, please!
645
00:31:54,917 --> 00:31:56,919
Yes, it was.
646
00:31:56,920 --> 00:31:59,622
I'm sorry, sir. No one picked up.
647
00:31:59,623 --> 00:32:01,781
Is there another number you'd like to try?
648
00:32:02,526 --> 00:32:07,662
Um, no, no, that's okay.
649
00:32:07,663 --> 00:32:09,836
That's fine. Thank you.
650
00:32:12,615 --> 00:32:15,037
I think that's a pretty
good parent over there.
651
00:32:15,038 --> 00:32:16,037
Uh-hmm.
652
00:32:16,038 --> 00:32:19,510
She's very uh, opinionated
and judgmental...
653
00:32:25,317 --> 00:32:26,949
I told you this was a bad idea.
654
00:32:26,950 --> 00:32:27,950
Shut up, shut up!
655
00:33:01,952 --> 00:33:03,653
Well then, tell me about it.
656
00:33:03,654 --> 00:33:04,987
Seriously?
657
00:33:04,988 --> 00:33:06,588
Yes, seriously, of course!
658
00:33:06,589 --> 00:33:08,958
Here I am, I'm leaving.
659
00:33:08,959 --> 00:33:10,893
Is this a joke?
660
00:33:10,894 --> 00:33:12,894
What a pitiful advocate you are!
661
00:33:12,895 --> 00:33:16,031
Speak, whether it's a joke or not.
662
00:33:16,032 --> 00:33:17,666
Uh, uh, why are you looking
663
00:33:17,667 --> 00:33:20,036
all around the room like that?
664
00:33:20,037 --> 00:33:23,605
Oh, you, you really are in a temper.
665
00:33:23,606 --> 00:33:25,740
I wish to take a lover,
666
00:33:25,741 --> 00:33:27,242
or if not a lover, at least a cavalier.
667
00:33:27,243 --> 00:33:28,278
Whom do you suggest?
668
00:33:28,279 --> 00:33:30,579
I shall abide by your choice from,
669
00:33:30,580 --> 00:33:31,847
from tomorrow, from this evening,
670
00:33:31,848 --> 00:33:33,915
whoever has the fancy to
sing beneath my window
671
00:33:33,916 --> 00:33:35,785
will find my door ajar.
672
00:33:35,786 --> 00:33:36,752
Well...
673
00:33:36,753 --> 00:33:38,954
Well, nothing to say?
674
00:33:38,955 --> 00:33:40,656
Marry me!
675
00:33:55,641 --> 00:33:58,641
I sure don't like the way you're
looking at Dylan tonight.
676
00:33:58,642 --> 00:33:59,941
I am not doing anything.
677
00:33:59,942 --> 00:34:02,845
Okay, maybe it's me, but I don't know.
678
00:34:02,846 --> 00:34:03,846
Just stop it!
679
00:34:07,751 --> 00:34:10,620
I didn't even understand any
of the Parisian speech.
680
00:34:10,621 --> 00:34:12,889
I think they were Canadian.
681
00:34:14,943 --> 00:34:17,259
- Bonsoir, Monsieur Valmont.
- Hello, Didier.
682
00:34:17,260 --> 00:34:18,660
Your usual table is waiting.
683
00:34:18,661 --> 00:34:19,828
Great, thank you.
684
00:34:19,829 --> 00:34:23,198
Will you be paying tonight
or putting it on the books?
685
00:34:23,199 --> 00:34:24,634
It will be on the books,
686
00:34:24,635 --> 00:34:26,636
and that goes for the whole table.
687
00:34:26,637 --> 00:34:28,203
- So...
- Ah, very well.
688
00:34:28,204 --> 00:34:30,376
Please, right this way.
689
00:34:32,376 --> 00:34:33,880
Bonsoir.
690
00:34:38,248 --> 00:34:40,149
No, it's just a little bit,
I'll just have a little.
691
00:34:40,150 --> 00:34:42,051
What did you think?
692
00:34:42,052 --> 00:34:44,053
I don't know.
I felt that it was sort of pretentious.
693
00:34:44,054 --> 00:34:45,087
Uh-hm.
694
00:34:45,088 --> 00:34:48,089
It seemed like everyone who was
in the theater was just there to be seen.
695
00:34:48,090 --> 00:34:49,725
There to be seen?
696
00:34:49,726 --> 00:34:51,926
It was a theater, it was
pitch black in there.
697
00:34:51,927 --> 00:34:55,196
How am I supposed to care
698
00:34:55,197 --> 00:34:57,933
about a group of over
privileged, affluent types
699
00:34:57,934 --> 00:34:59,134
who go gallivanting around
700
00:34:59,135 --> 00:35:00,970
without any sort of a moral compass.
701
00:35:00,971 --> 00:35:02,303
Yeah, affluent have plenty of problems.
702
00:35:02,304 --> 00:35:03,705
I'm a mess.
703
00:35:03,706 --> 00:35:05,774
I'm sorry, but I'm very sensitive
704
00:35:05,775 --> 00:35:08,343
to an audience's reaction,
and I couldn't get into it.
705
00:35:08,344 --> 00:35:09,444
If they all jumped off a bridge,
706
00:35:09,445 --> 00:35:10,446
would you join them?
707
00:35:10,447 --> 00:35:13,181
I hate that analogy, I
really do, but maybe.
708
00:35:13,182 --> 00:35:15,017
Maybe there's a reason for
why they're all doing that.
709
00:35:15,018 --> 00:35:17,285
Maybe the bridge is about to explode
and no one told me.
710
00:35:17,286 --> 00:35:18,553
That's a good point.
711
00:35:18,554 --> 00:35:22,325
And just how am I supposed to sympathize
with these characters?
712
00:35:22,525 --> 00:35:24,926
No one suffers any consequences
for their actions,
713
00:35:24,927 --> 00:35:28,897
no one learns anything, and nobody changes.
714
00:35:28,898 --> 00:35:31,901
It was a satire.
715
00:35:31,902 --> 00:35:34,136
I didn't get that at all.
716
00:35:34,137 --> 00:35:35,837
I love this place.
717
00:35:35,838 --> 00:35:37,806
It's so chic.
718
00:35:37,807 --> 00:35:39,808
Wait, I thought you said
that the door policy
719
00:35:39,809 --> 00:35:43,011
was discriminatory and
this place was insipid.
720
00:35:43,012 --> 00:35:44,779
Well, I did say that,
721
00:35:44,780 --> 00:35:49,185
but that was before I came inside.
722
00:35:49,186 --> 00:35:50,419
I'm going to go.
723
00:35:50,420 --> 00:35:52,492
Count to five and then follow me.
724
00:35:55,492 --> 00:35:57,326
Oh, are you wearing perfume?
725
00:35:57,327 --> 00:35:58,493
Excuse me?
726
00:35:58,494 --> 00:36:00,428
Don't you feel a little bit strange
about being an artist in a world
727
00:36:00,429 --> 00:36:02,931
that's already so full of art?
728
00:36:02,932 --> 00:36:04,433
Isn't that sort of a waste?
729
00:36:04,434 --> 00:36:06,435
I forget, what do you do?
730
00:36:06,436 --> 00:36:08,203
I'm getting a doctorate at Columbia
731
00:36:08,204 --> 00:36:10,004
in postmodern criticism.
732
00:36:10,005 --> 00:36:12,107
Ugh, for me I think that
people who are creative
733
00:36:12,108 --> 00:36:14,042
are really just indulgent.
734
00:36:14,043 --> 00:36:15,745
There's only so much, and we don't,
735
00:36:15,746 --> 00:36:16,846
we don't need any more,
736
00:36:16,847 --> 00:36:18,113
and there are so many people
who are without, you know,
737
00:36:18,114 --> 00:36:22,151
you should just be a farmer.
738
00:36:22,152 --> 00:36:23,816
You can always tell what
someone thinks of you
739
00:36:24,016 --> 00:36:25,088
by who they set you up with.
740
00:36:29,387 --> 00:36:31,493
The only reason that I'm dancing with you
741
00:36:31,494 --> 00:36:34,462
is because I'm incredibly drunk.
742
00:36:34,463 --> 00:36:37,799
I despise you and everything
that you stand for.
743
00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:39,234
Where are Conrad and Beatrice?
744
00:36:39,235 --> 00:36:40,770
I don't know.
745
00:36:40,771 --> 00:36:42,350
You want to get another drink?
746
00:36:43,539 --> 00:36:47,181
You're a bit of a philistine, aren't you?
747
00:36:50,781 --> 00:36:52,848
I'm sorry, wait, tell me your name again.
748
00:36:52,849 --> 00:36:53,982
Jocelyn.
749
00:36:53,983 --> 00:36:55,218
Are you kidding me?
750
00:36:55,219 --> 00:36:57,540
I just got out of a three-year
relationship with a Jocelyn.
751
00:36:57,740 --> 00:36:58,821
Do you want to sleep over?
752
00:36:58,822 --> 00:37:00,823
Hm. Your place or mine?
753
00:37:00,824 --> 00:37:01,860
I live in a dorm.
754
00:37:04,860 --> 00:37:06,496
Definitely mine.
755
00:37:13,302 --> 00:37:15,837
You know, I realized
something the other day.
756
00:37:15,838 --> 00:37:18,808
Usually the women that I
like as human beings,
757
00:37:18,809 --> 00:37:20,375
I'm not sexually attracted to,
758
00:37:20,376 --> 00:37:22,912
and the ones that I'm
sexually attracted to,
759
00:37:22,913 --> 00:37:26,181
I don't particularly like as human beings.
760
00:37:26,182 --> 00:37:27,582
On the rare occasion
761
00:37:27,583 --> 00:37:29,951
when one of them falls
into both categories,
762
00:37:29,952 --> 00:37:33,221
they usually have a boyfriend or a husband.
763
00:37:33,222 --> 00:37:35,357
What are you trying to say?
764
00:37:35,358 --> 00:37:38,227
I'm trying to say,
765
00:37:38,228 --> 00:37:40,596
what I'm trying to say
is, you know, it's great
766
00:37:40,597 --> 00:37:42,832
that you don't have a boyfriend.
767
00:37:42,833 --> 00:37:46,835
Oh, but I am married. Is that a problem?
768
00:37:46,836 --> 00:37:47,903
You're a cheater though.
769
00:37:47,904 --> 00:37:50,335
- Oh, uh-huh, yeah.
- Right?
770
00:38:23,405 --> 00:38:24,958
I've got to tell Dylan.
771
00:38:42,958 --> 00:38:45,127
I've got to tell him, right?
772
00:38:45,128 --> 00:38:46,194
You tell him,
773
00:38:46,195 --> 00:38:50,064
you just come right out and
you just let him know,
774
00:38:50,065 --> 00:38:51,533
you just tell him.
775
00:38:51,534 --> 00:38:53,067
You've got to tell him.
776
00:38:53,068 --> 00:38:55,121
You've got to tell him, got to tell him.
777
00:38:58,507 --> 00:38:59,718
You've got to tell him.
778
00:39:02,545 --> 00:39:04,349
Oh God!
779
00:39:07,349 --> 00:39:08,651
This was it.
780
00:39:08,652 --> 00:39:12,020
This was the moment Conrad
would right his wrongs.
781
00:39:12,021 --> 00:39:13,355
Hey.
782
00:39:13,356 --> 00:39:15,323
This was the moment he would bare his soul
783
00:39:15,324 --> 00:39:16,591
to his only friend.
784
00:39:16,592 --> 00:39:17,627
What's going on?
785
00:39:17,628 --> 00:39:20,361
And tell him of his betrayal.
786
00:39:20,362 --> 00:39:23,670
This was the moment Conrad
would ask for forgiveness.
787
00:39:26,670 --> 00:39:30,205
Nothing, nothing, nothing at all.
788
00:39:30,206 --> 00:39:33,575
What? Does something
seem like it's going on?
789
00:39:33,576 --> 00:39:35,477
Yeah, seemed like you were
about to say something.
790
00:39:35,478 --> 00:39:37,645
No, uh-uh, no, no, not at all.
791
00:39:37,646 --> 00:39:38,980
Where's uh, friend?
792
00:39:38,981 --> 00:39:40,518
Oh, you mean Jocelyn?
793
00:39:41,518 --> 00:39:42,618
No, the friend.
794
00:39:42,619 --> 00:39:45,287
Yeah, the friend's name is Jocelyn.
795
00:39:45,288 --> 00:39:47,323
Oh, really? Ironic.
796
00:39:47,324 --> 00:39:49,158
I don't want to talk about it.
797
00:39:49,159 --> 00:39:50,259
Didn't have sex with her, huh?
798
00:39:50,260 --> 00:39:51,660
No, I didn't have sex with her.
799
00:39:51,661 --> 00:39:53,095
I had to talk to her all night.
800
00:39:53,096 --> 00:39:55,564
She only left half an hour ago.
801
00:39:55,565 --> 00:39:56,733
It was horrible.
802
00:39:59,195 --> 00:40:00,669
So what happened last night?
803
00:40:00,670 --> 00:40:02,604
What happened was that it was amazing,
804
00:40:02,605 --> 00:40:05,274
and we talked until the sun came up!
805
00:40:05,275 --> 00:40:06,275
That's amazing!
806
00:40:09,512 --> 00:40:11,647
I have something I have to ask you.
807
00:40:11,648 --> 00:40:13,415
Yes.
808
00:40:13,416 --> 00:40:15,584
Are you sleeping with Beatrice?
809
00:40:15,585 --> 00:40:20,327
Uh...
810
00:40:25,327 --> 00:40:28,464
No, no, no.
811
00:40:28,465 --> 00:40:32,433
Good. Good man.
812
00:40:32,434 --> 00:40:35,104
Something I'd like to ask you.
813
00:40:35,105 --> 00:40:37,105
May I sleep with Beatrice?
814
00:40:37,106 --> 00:40:39,741
Definitely not!
815
00:40:39,742 --> 00:40:41,542
No!
816
00:40:41,543 --> 00:40:43,178
Got something I'd like to tell you.
817
00:40:43,179 --> 00:40:45,747
- What is it now?
- Beatrice and I are already together.
818
00:40:45,748 --> 00:40:46,749
Dylan! Dylan! Dylan!
819
00:40:46,750 --> 00:40:49,051
- I'll kill you!
- Easy, easy!
820
00:40:49,052 --> 00:40:50,151
Now as we ease into adulthood,
821
00:40:50,152 --> 00:40:52,120
sometimes a good stiff drink
is the only excuse we have
822
00:40:52,121 --> 00:40:55,223
- for committing the atrocities...
- Ease into adulthood?
823
00:40:55,224 --> 00:40:56,290
Yes. Now come on.
824
00:40:56,291 --> 00:40:57,625
We're nearly 40!
825
00:40:57,626 --> 00:40:59,395
I said I was sorry. Okay?
826
00:40:59,396 --> 00:41:02,464
- I was going to...
- You're a selfish asshole.
827
00:41:02,465 --> 00:41:04,137
Now hang on.
828
00:41:07,137 --> 00:41:08,404
Selfish?
829
00:41:08,405 --> 00:41:10,138
Dylan, you're the one that's selfish.
830
00:41:10,139 --> 00:41:12,774
I might actually have a
shot with her, okay?
831
00:41:12,775 --> 00:41:16,210
She could be the one.
832
00:41:16,211 --> 00:41:18,379
The one!
833
00:41:18,380 --> 00:41:19,580
What are you, 14?
834
00:41:19,581 --> 00:41:21,350
It's not charming anymore, Conrad.
835
00:41:21,351 --> 00:41:23,285
I need you to sleep somewhere else tonight.
836
00:41:23,286 --> 00:41:24,444
You're kicking me out?
837
00:41:30,993 --> 00:41:32,460
And you realize by kicking me out,
838
00:41:32,461 --> 00:41:34,304
I'll probably move in with Beatrice?
839
00:41:39,601 --> 00:41:43,146
Sometimes you're your own worst enemy.
840
00:41:51,146 --> 00:41:52,814
Conrad's ability to trust
841
00:41:52,815 --> 00:41:56,685
had been marred by years
of betrayal and deceit,
842
00:41:56,686 --> 00:41:59,354
for others had only dated or befriended him
843
00:41:59,355 --> 00:42:02,357
to gain access to his wealth.
844
00:42:02,358 --> 00:42:04,426
He had been quoted on numerous occasions
845
00:42:04,427 --> 00:42:07,796
as saying that no one could be trusted.
846
00:42:07,797 --> 00:42:12,811
What he forgot to add was
that included himself.
847
00:42:22,756 --> 00:42:24,546
Well, I feel very, very conflicted.
848
00:42:24,547 --> 00:42:27,381
I-I like the idea of living
up at the summer home,
849
00:42:27,382 --> 00:42:29,584
you know, upstate, the life
of a reclusive writer.
850
00:42:29,585 --> 00:42:30,653
I really do,
851
00:42:30,654 --> 00:42:33,421
but I'm allergic to the
grass and the clean air,
852
00:42:33,422 --> 00:42:35,756
the bees, the ticks, the badgers,
853
00:42:35,757 --> 00:42:36,757
bunch of wildlife.
854
00:42:39,528 --> 00:42:41,497
What are you trying to say, Conrad?
855
00:42:41,498 --> 00:42:43,332
I'm going to move in with Beatrice.
856
00:42:43,333 --> 00:42:46,167
Oh, oh, that's great news.
857
00:42:46,168 --> 00:42:47,169
Thank you.
858
00:42:47,170 --> 00:42:48,303
Does she know that you're broke
859
00:42:48,304 --> 00:42:49,831
and have no place else to go?
860
00:42:55,144 --> 00:42:56,278
Yes.
861
00:42:56,279 --> 00:42:58,379
Don't you feel guilty about Dylan?
862
00:42:58,380 --> 00:42:59,547
Obviously, but you know,
863
00:42:59,548 --> 00:43:02,817
this is actually a very small city,
and if you meet an attractive girl,
864
00:43:02,818 --> 00:43:04,720
the chances are great
that one of your friends
865
00:43:04,721 --> 00:43:07,221
has already slept with her or wants to.
866
00:43:07,222 --> 00:43:08,489
Hm.
867
00:43:08,490 --> 00:43:11,593
You're lying to yourself, Conrad.
868
00:43:11,594 --> 00:43:13,629
I know.
869
00:43:13,630 --> 00:43:16,302
I'm okay with it.
870
00:43:20,302 --> 00:43:21,907
Ding-dong.
871
00:43:24,907 --> 00:43:26,575
Hi.
872
00:43:26,576 --> 00:43:28,643
Bonjour, mon amour.
873
00:43:28,644 --> 00:43:29,745
What's going on?
874
00:43:29,746 --> 00:43:32,247
I'm moving in.
875
00:43:32,248 --> 00:43:34,283
What happen to Dylan's?
876
00:43:34,284 --> 00:43:37,886
I was allergic to his
sheets, Egyptian cotton.
877
00:43:37,887 --> 00:43:39,523
I have Egyptian cotton.
878
00:43:40,523 --> 00:43:42,787
Well, we'll have to do
something about that.
879
00:43:51,601 --> 00:43:53,834
I think I'm in love with you.
880
00:43:53,835 --> 00:43:55,907
How? It's only been two days.
881
00:43:57,907 --> 00:44:00,576
Then I'm in love with the idea of you.
882
00:44:00,577 --> 00:44:01,577
Not the actual me?
883
00:44:02,512 --> 00:44:05,416
Well the idea of someone is always better.
884
00:44:07,416 --> 00:44:09,585
You can't have sex with an idea.
885
00:44:53,596 --> 00:44:56,698
I'm telling you, don't put a scratch on it.
886
00:44:56,699 --> 00:44:57,732
I won't.
887
00:44:57,733 --> 00:44:59,701
Your father is going to kill me.
888
00:44:59,702 --> 00:45:01,036
She's waiting.
889
00:45:46,581 --> 00:45:48,884
Oh, there it is.
890
00:45:48,885 --> 00:45:50,685
Yeah, what do you see there?
891
00:45:50,686 --> 00:45:53,788
Well, I mean it's obvious, kind of.
892
00:45:53,789 --> 00:45:54,589
Right.
893
00:45:54,590 --> 00:45:58,993
Explosive, it's explosive.
894
00:45:58,994 --> 00:46:01,465
A car, right?
895
00:46:02,465 --> 00:46:05,369
And do you see just the headlights?
896
00:46:06,369 --> 00:46:09,004
It's a female orgasm.
897
00:46:09,005 --> 00:46:10,738
I think it's kind of clear. I don't...
898
00:46:10,739 --> 00:46:13,115
That the driver is having?
899
00:46:20,115 --> 00:46:22,084
What's wrong?
900
00:46:22,085 --> 00:46:23,085
Um,
901
00:46:25,021 --> 00:46:26,021
nothing.
902
00:46:56,085 --> 00:46:58,453
Sitting at Beatrice's piano,
903
00:46:58,454 --> 00:47:01,022
Conrad quietly read Dylan's note.
904
00:47:01,023 --> 00:47:03,924
In lieu of unnecessary explanations,
905
00:47:03,925 --> 00:47:06,530
please enjoy this Volvo.
906
00:47:07,530 --> 00:47:10,698
Conrad began to feel an odd sensation,
907
00:47:10,699 --> 00:47:12,868
one of guilt.
908
00:47:12,869 --> 00:47:14,764
He had never felt the emotion before.
909
00:47:20,675 --> 00:47:23,179
I think I have a brain tumor.
910
00:47:24,179 --> 00:47:25,179
What?
911
00:47:28,751 --> 00:47:30,097
Nothing.
912
00:47:42,097 --> 00:47:44,665
I'm not, I'm not in the mood.
913
00:47:44,666 --> 00:47:46,469
I'm sorry.
914
00:47:47,469 --> 00:47:49,770
Sorry. Sorry.
915
00:47:49,771 --> 00:47:54,875
You're never in the mood anymore.
916
00:47:54,876 --> 00:47:56,578
We had sex last night.
917
00:47:56,579 --> 00:47:57,946
Yeah.
918
00:47:57,947 --> 00:48:01,019
You seemed a little distant.
919
00:48:04,019 --> 00:48:06,187
Oh, we're just going through a dry spell.
920
00:48:06,188 --> 00:48:07,888
Dry spell?
921
00:48:07,889 --> 00:48:08,992
That's all.
922
00:48:09,992 --> 00:48:11,459
Okay.
923
00:48:11,460 --> 00:48:12,793
It's only been a week.
924
00:48:44,793 --> 00:48:46,495
Watching Beatrice
925
00:48:46,496 --> 00:48:48,497
as she delicately played the piano,
926
00:48:48,498 --> 00:48:51,765
Conrad felt horrible for
his ceaseless deception.
927
00:48:51,766 --> 00:48:56,904
For a moment he contemplated
admitting his impoverishment.
928
00:48:56,905 --> 00:48:59,148
Then the moment passed.
929
00:49:06,766 --> 00:49:08,082
How can I be with someone
930
00:49:08,083 --> 00:49:11,118
that doesn't appreciate Bach or a Valmont.
931
00:49:11,119 --> 00:49:14,989
This is a classic story, Conrad.
932
00:49:14,990 --> 00:49:17,091
Pygmalion.
933
00:49:17,092 --> 00:49:18,192
Have you even read Pygmalion.
934
00:49:18,193 --> 00:49:20,995
This has nothing to do with Pygmalion.
935
00:49:20,996 --> 00:49:23,899
You should revisit that.
936
00:49:23,900 --> 00:49:26,637
Or get the notes or I'll read it to you.
937
00:49:27,637 --> 00:49:28,848
I've seen My Fair Lady.
938
00:49:30,773 --> 00:49:32,640
Okay, Beatrice, stop right there.
939
00:49:32,641 --> 00:49:33,674
Don't move, okay?
940
00:49:33,675 --> 00:49:35,843
Don't move. Like that.
941
00:49:35,844 --> 00:49:37,044
Beautiful, you're beautiful.
942
00:49:37,045 --> 00:49:38,047
She's magnifique.
943
00:49:40,983 --> 00:49:42,405
Give me love, give me love.
944
00:49:43,318 --> 00:49:44,718
You love me?
945
00:49:44,719 --> 00:49:45,720
Smile.
946
00:49:45,721 --> 00:49:47,087
Ah, voilà.
947
00:49:47,088 --> 00:49:48,723
You love me, you love me.
948
00:49:48,724 --> 00:49:49,924
Okay. Show me, show me.
949
00:49:49,925 --> 00:49:50,926
Show me you love me.
950
00:49:50,927 --> 00:49:52,928
Show me.
Okay.
951
00:49:52,929 --> 00:49:53,928
Love.
952
00:49:53,929 --> 00:49:56,064
Hate, now, like that.
953
00:49:56,065 --> 00:49:57,064
Beautiful, beautiful.
954
00:49:57,065 --> 00:49:58,966
Love...
955
00:49:58,967 --> 00:50:00,701
...hate.
956
00:50:00,702 --> 00:50:01,970
Love.
957
00:50:01,971 --> 00:50:03,608
Voilà, one more?
958
00:50:05,608 --> 00:50:07,311
Chapter one.
959
00:50:08,311 --> 00:50:12,113
Greece is a place he had visited
many times in his mind,
960
00:50:12,114 --> 00:50:13,114
but on this day...
961
00:50:19,922 --> 00:50:21,927
Jumping forward, chapter three.
962
00:50:25,927 --> 00:50:26,927
Chapter four.
963
00:50:36,706 --> 00:50:40,177
So how long are they going to
be remodeling the Valmont?
964
00:50:42,177 --> 00:50:43,979
Uh, a couple months maybe, I think.
965
00:50:43,980 --> 00:50:44,879
What?
966
00:50:44,880 --> 00:50:46,147
Sometimes they take a couple months.
Yeah.
967
00:50:46,148 --> 00:50:47,649
Months? You said weeks.
968
00:50:47,650 --> 00:50:48,783
Well...
969
00:50:48,784 --> 00:50:51,118
Oh.
970
00:50:51,119 --> 00:50:53,654
- Hey.
- Hey.
971
00:50:53,655 --> 00:50:55,022
I got your gift.
972
00:50:55,023 --> 00:50:56,023
Hm.
973
00:51:03,717 --> 00:51:06,033
Well, as good as it is
to bump into you guys,
974
00:51:06,034 --> 00:51:08,192
I have to go. I've got my opening tonight.
975
00:51:09,345 --> 00:51:11,806
- What part of town is that in?
- Whitman Gallery.
976
00:51:11,807 --> 00:51:13,808
Maybe we'll see you there.
977
00:51:13,809 --> 00:51:16,048
Don't know the time.
978
00:51:20,048 --> 00:51:21,048
Who's that girl?
979
00:51:22,985 --> 00:51:25,687
- Jocelyn.
- That's not Jocelyn.
980
00:51:25,688 --> 00:51:27,822
I know, the uh, the other Jocelyn.
981
00:51:29,425 --> 00:51:31,693
Let's get in this car, come on.
982
00:52:27,248 --> 00:52:29,338
I've got to go.
983
00:53:51,631 --> 00:53:53,000
Conrad had often professed
984
00:53:53,001 --> 00:53:56,337
that he led a life of the mind.
985
00:53:56,338 --> 00:53:58,205
Unfortunately for him,
986
00:53:58,206 --> 00:54:01,576
his mind had been damaged
by years of abandonment,
987
00:54:01,577 --> 00:54:04,412
philandering, Tom Collins,
988
00:54:04,413 --> 00:54:07,415
and a two-pack-per-day nicotine habit,
989
00:54:07,416 --> 00:54:10,951
not to mention an unhealthy
Oedipal complex.
990
00:54:10,952 --> 00:54:14,221
The weight of his guilt had
finally become too heavy.
991
00:54:14,222 --> 00:54:17,469
The incessant charade
could go on no longer.
992
00:54:28,469 --> 00:54:29,662
What's wrong?
993
00:54:29,862 --> 00:54:31,605
Where were you?
994
00:54:31,606 --> 00:54:33,274
You left me in the concert.
995
00:54:33,275 --> 00:54:35,243
You stayed, huh?
996
00:54:35,244 --> 00:54:36,845
Actually, I did.
997
00:54:36,846 --> 00:54:37,916
It was beautiful.
998
00:54:44,586 --> 00:54:45,850
We're out of cigarettes.
999
00:54:49,525 --> 00:54:50,994
Where are we going?
1000
00:54:52,994 --> 00:54:54,395
To The Valmont.
1001
00:54:54,396 --> 00:54:56,430
Why are we hiding behind the bushes?
1002
00:54:56,431 --> 00:54:57,931
I need you to follow me
on the count of three...
1003
00:54:57,932 --> 00:54:59,070
- What?
- Ready? Go!
1004
00:55:02,070 --> 00:55:03,071
Timothy.
1005
00:55:03,072 --> 00:55:05,835
Frederick.
I don't believe you're supposed to...
1006
00:55:07,108 --> 00:55:08,942
Hello.
1007
00:55:08,943 --> 00:55:09,944
Mr. Valmont...
1008
00:55:09,945 --> 00:55:11,479
Mr. Valmont.
1009
00:55:11,480 --> 00:55:12,583
Stop them!
1010
00:55:14,583 --> 00:55:16,084
What is going on?
1011
00:55:16,085 --> 00:55:17,152
This is crazy.
1012
00:55:17,352 --> 00:55:18,953
I know. Isn't it fun?
1013
00:55:18,954 --> 00:55:21,055
Where are we going?
1014
00:55:21,056 --> 00:55:22,189
Why are we...
1015
00:55:22,190 --> 00:55:23,394
Sh-h-h-h!
1016
00:55:26,394 --> 00:55:27,394
Come on!
1017
00:55:32,935 --> 00:55:33,935
Please turn on the lights.
1018
00:55:33,936 --> 00:55:35,169
What is happening?
1019
00:55:35,170 --> 00:55:36,370
It's a game.
1020
00:55:36,371 --> 00:55:38,171
Hey, if you see my mother's
jewels, get those.
1021
00:55:38,172 --> 00:55:40,241
What? No, we should not do that.
1022
00:55:40,242 --> 00:55:41,242
Sh-h-h-h!
1023
00:55:44,112 --> 00:55:45,580
Uh.
1024
00:55:45,581 --> 00:55:48,250
I showed her, that washed-up debutante.
1025
00:55:55,190 --> 00:55:56,189
Shit!
1026
00:55:56,190 --> 00:55:58,326
Really, really good work, Timothy.
1027
00:55:58,327 --> 00:55:59,694
It's Frederick, sir.
1028
00:55:59,695 --> 00:56:01,261
Yes, Frederick. Sorry.
1029
00:56:01,262 --> 00:56:02,330
Yeah, I know.
1030
00:56:02,331 --> 00:56:03,663
I thank you a lot in really
picking up the pace.
1031
00:56:03,863 --> 00:56:05,366
Now you know where to return
Mother's jewels, right.
1032
00:56:05,367 --> 00:56:07,567
That's the penthouse, the East wing,
1033
00:56:07,568 --> 00:56:10,104
the Rhodesian cabinet, third drawer.
1034
00:56:10,105 --> 00:56:13,573
I've got my cigarettes.
1035
00:56:13,574 --> 00:56:15,627
Please tell Bernard that I'm very sorry.
1036
00:56:18,179 --> 00:56:19,601
I'll be right there, Honey.
1037
00:56:23,585 --> 00:56:25,352
What was all that about?
1038
00:56:25,353 --> 00:56:27,455
I'm not sure I even know anymore.
1039
00:56:27,456 --> 00:56:29,489
Conrad, what is going on?
1040
00:56:29,490 --> 00:56:31,392
You know, Beatrice,
1041
00:56:31,393 --> 00:56:33,026
I only moved in with you
1042
00:56:33,027 --> 00:56:34,261
because I've got no place else to go.
1043
00:56:34,262 --> 00:56:35,263
Okay? I'm broke.
1044
00:56:35,264 --> 00:56:36,698
What do you mean?
1045
00:56:36,699 --> 00:56:38,031
I have nothing.
1046
00:56:38,032 --> 00:56:39,433
I was kicked out of The Valmont.
1047
00:56:39,434 --> 00:56:41,268
My parents cut me off.
1048
00:56:41,269 --> 00:56:43,104
Conrad, you're nearly 40 years old.
1049
00:56:43,105 --> 00:56:44,671
Well, that's completely irrelevant.
1050
00:56:44,672 --> 00:56:47,008
I've got separation anxiety,
abandonment issues.
1051
00:56:47,009 --> 00:56:49,977
Are you saying you've been
lying to me this entire time?
1052
00:56:49,978 --> 00:56:53,982
Yes, but I'm not the only liar.
1053
00:56:53,983 --> 00:56:56,216
I saw you with Dylan earlier today.
1054
00:56:56,217 --> 00:56:57,317
What?
1055
00:56:57,318 --> 00:57:00,221
You've been following me now?
1056
00:57:00,222 --> 00:57:03,658
I-I was trying to patch
things up between you.
1057
00:57:03,659 --> 00:57:05,125
God, grow up!
1058
00:57:05,126 --> 00:57:08,129
No, you are not honest with yourself.
That's your problem.
1059
00:57:08,130 --> 00:57:09,997
Okay? You're always acting so virtuous,
1060
00:57:09,998 --> 00:57:11,031
you're always talking
about how you want to be
1061
00:57:11,032 --> 00:57:12,533
a bohemian musician.
1062
00:57:12,534 --> 00:57:16,270
In the end, you're just a model.
1063
00:57:16,271 --> 00:57:18,705
But at least I have a job.
1064
00:57:18,706 --> 00:57:21,576
You have just managed to coast through life
without worrying about money
1065
00:57:21,577 --> 00:57:23,678
or anything else pertaining to reality.
1066
00:57:23,679 --> 00:57:26,147
You are just a philandering narcissist
1067
00:57:26,148 --> 00:57:28,348
who is so afraid of being alone
because when you are alone,
1068
00:57:28,349 --> 00:57:30,551
you are going to realize
how empty your life is,
1069
00:57:30,552 --> 00:57:32,185
and you know what, I should
have gone with Dylan
1070
00:57:32,186 --> 00:57:34,154
because between the two of
you, he was the nice one.
1071
00:57:34,155 --> 00:57:36,624
You are insufferable!
1072
00:57:36,625 --> 00:57:39,327
Didn't seem to bother you
when I was flipping the bill.
1073
00:57:39,527 --> 00:57:41,129
All right. You're just
like the rest of them.
1074
00:57:41,130 --> 00:57:43,163
You are only with me for the money.
1075
00:57:43,164 --> 00:57:45,366
I am the only girl you have ever been with
1076
00:57:45,367 --> 00:57:46,667
who wasn't just in it for the money,
1077
00:57:46,668 --> 00:57:48,142
and besides, you were broke.
1078
00:57:51,606 --> 00:57:54,280
Well, you didn't know that.
1079
00:59:36,612 --> 00:59:39,379
Staring into the grill of a bread truck,
1080
00:59:39,380 --> 00:59:41,848
Conrad couldn't help but
think of the poor woman
1081
00:59:41,849 --> 00:59:47,388
who had been diagnosed with
witzelsucht, the joking disease.
1082
00:59:47,389 --> 00:59:51,591
In a daze, he suddenly began
to speak fluent German,
1083
00:59:51,592 --> 00:59:54,286
though he had never studied the language.
1084
01:00:02,436 --> 01:00:04,572
He promptly lost consciousness.
1085
01:00:16,451 --> 01:00:17,817
Where does it hurt?
1086
01:00:17,818 --> 01:00:22,890
Uh, uberall.
1087
01:00:22,891 --> 01:00:26,928
Conrad's worst fear had come true.
1088
01:00:26,929 --> 01:00:29,331
He was all alone.
1089
01:00:34,436 --> 01:00:35,835
Hello?
1090
01:00:35,836 --> 01:00:36,836
Who's this?
1091
01:00:37,505 --> 01:00:39,439
It's your son, Conrad. Hi.
1092
01:00:39,440 --> 01:00:41,274
- Connie.
- What's the... Where are you?
1093
01:00:41,275 --> 01:00:42,375
What's that noise?
1094
01:00:42,376 --> 01:00:43,955
Can't you see I'm preoccupied.
1095
01:00:47,416 --> 01:00:49,317
When are you coming home?
1096
01:00:49,318 --> 01:00:50,318
I don't know, Darling.
1097
01:00:50,518 --> 01:00:53,322
Divorce of this stature can take some time.
1098
01:00:57,559 --> 01:01:00,361
How long do you think?
1099
01:01:00,362 --> 01:01:01,681
Look, I have to go.
1100
01:01:20,681 --> 01:01:22,260
Maybe this will all blow over.
1101
01:01:23,938 --> 01:01:26,254
I just saw the most
amazing performance piece
1102
01:01:26,255 --> 01:01:28,288
where a husband and wife
tied themselves together
1103
01:01:28,289 --> 01:01:30,825
with a 10-foot rope for an entire year.
1104
01:01:30,826 --> 01:01:33,861
It was a commentary on
the modern relationship.
1105
01:01:33,862 --> 01:01:35,462
That is the most beautiful metaphor
1106
01:01:35,463 --> 01:01:39,966
I've ever heard. What happened to them?
1107
01:01:39,967 --> 01:01:41,535
They got a divorce.
1108
01:01:41,536 --> 01:01:42,775
Hm.
1109
01:01:47,398 --> 01:01:49,609
I heard you went out with Beatrice earlier.
1110
01:01:49,610 --> 01:01:52,610
She was trying to get me to do
what we're doing right now.
1111
01:01:56,385 --> 01:01:58,653
Dylan, I guess you were right.
1112
01:01:58,654 --> 01:01:59,854
About what?
1113
01:01:59,855 --> 01:02:02,829
Sometimes I am my own worst enemy.
1114
01:02:08,829 --> 01:02:10,251
What happened to your face?
1115
01:02:13,802 --> 01:02:15,602
I got hit by a truck.
1116
01:02:15,603 --> 01:02:16,603
Uh-hm.
1117
01:02:17,505 --> 01:02:18,641
Zeus is dead.
1118
01:02:20,641 --> 01:02:22,410
You could fetter my leg,
1119
01:02:22,411 --> 01:02:26,483
but Zeus himself cannot get
the better of my free will.
1120
01:02:28,483 --> 01:02:31,487
And I want my Volvo back,
that was just a joke.
1121
01:02:32,487 --> 01:02:34,455
So how are things with Jocelyn?
1122
01:02:34,456 --> 01:02:36,924
Oh, we broke up again.
1123
01:02:36,925 --> 01:02:39,444
This time it's for good.
I think she was stealing from me.
1124
01:02:41,829 --> 01:02:43,017
That's rough.
1125
01:02:43,217 --> 01:02:45,866
How are things with Beatrice?
1126
01:02:45,867 --> 01:02:46,933
Not so good.
1127
01:02:46,934 --> 01:02:48,368
No?
1128
01:02:48,369 --> 01:02:49,636
Well, it's not a surprise
1129
01:02:49,637 --> 01:02:52,342
considering what an asshole you are.
1130
01:02:53,342 --> 01:02:54,642
I resent that.
1131
01:02:54,643 --> 01:02:56,813
Well, you should. It was an insult.
1132
01:02:57,813 --> 01:03:00,013
You're not still mad at me, are you?
1133
01:03:00,014 --> 01:03:01,119
Not at all...
1134
01:03:05,119 --> 01:03:06,119
Maybe a little.
1135
01:03:08,090 --> 01:03:11,427
I really thought Beatrice
and I were going to last.
1136
01:03:13,427 --> 01:03:14,427
What is it?
1137
01:03:16,731 --> 01:03:18,031
- Hi.
- Hello.
1138
01:03:18,032 --> 01:03:23,671
Now, you two seem like fans of literature.
1139
01:03:23,672 --> 01:03:28,475
I have got a very impressive
library at my apartment.
1140
01:03:28,476 --> 01:03:30,745
- Really?
- Uh-hm.
1141
01:03:30,746 --> 01:03:32,849
Do you want to see my Balzac collection?
1142
01:03:34,450 --> 01:03:36,450
You sure you don't want to do anything?
1143
01:03:36,451 --> 01:03:37,951
I can't, sorry.
1144
01:03:37,952 --> 01:03:41,958
It would be a misrepresentation
of how I feel inside.
1145
01:03:43,958 --> 01:03:45,695
I don't even know what that means.
1146
01:03:47,628 --> 01:03:49,965
Well, that's exactly the problem.
1147
01:04:03,677 --> 01:04:05,771
You can, uh, keep the Volvo.
1148
01:04:42,451 --> 01:04:44,685
Beatrice, it's Conrad.
1149
01:04:44,686 --> 01:04:46,020
Give me a call.
1150
01:04:46,021 --> 01:04:47,021
Call me back.
1151
01:04:55,996 --> 01:04:58,064
What do you see, Conrad?
1152
01:04:58,065 --> 01:04:59,065
Sex.
1153
01:05:01,203 --> 01:05:02,271
And now?
1154
01:05:02,471 --> 01:05:05,038
Beatrice. I mean, sex.
1155
01:05:05,039 --> 01:05:06,646
I mean, wait, Beatrice.
1156
01:05:11,646 --> 01:05:13,148
Now?
1157
01:05:14,148 --> 01:05:15,219
Sex.
1158
01:05:17,219 --> 01:05:19,822
This isn't healthy, Conrad.
1159
01:05:21,822 --> 01:05:22,822
I know that.
1160
01:05:24,759 --> 01:05:26,826
Meanwhile, Beatrice visited
1161
01:05:26,827 --> 01:05:28,729
her Upper West Side mystic
1162
01:05:28,730 --> 01:05:31,869
in an attempt to find similar
answers to her quandary.
1163
01:05:33,869 --> 01:05:34,938
Unfortunately,
1164
01:05:36,938 --> 01:05:39,175
her prospects were less than ideal.
1165
01:05:41,140 --> 01:05:42,877
I mean, I-I've only just moved in.
1166
01:05:42,878 --> 01:05:44,352
She's already kicked me out.
1167
01:05:45,246 --> 01:05:46,849
I don't know what to do.
1168
01:05:47,849 --> 01:05:50,116
Sometimes we have to make sacrifices
1169
01:05:50,117 --> 01:05:52,018
for the ones we love.
1170
01:05:52,019 --> 01:05:53,553
This literary moral code of yours
1171
01:05:53,554 --> 01:05:54,888
is completely unrealistic.
1172
01:05:54,889 --> 01:05:56,790
This isn't a Jane Austin novel,
1173
01:05:56,791 --> 01:05:58,896
and I'm certainly not Emily Post.
1174
01:06:00,896 --> 01:06:04,931
You have the moral code
of a Bolshevik, Conrad.
1175
01:06:04,932 --> 01:06:07,767
I mean, I'm, I'm having an
existential crisis here.
1176
01:06:07,768 --> 01:06:09,261
I can't stop thinking about her.
1177
01:06:09,461 --> 01:06:10,907
I think I need to see a doctor.
1178
01:06:12,740 --> 01:06:16,650
Conrad, I am a doctor.
1179
01:06:21,650 --> 01:06:23,184
Beatrice?
1180
01:06:24,184 --> 01:06:25,260
Beatrice?
1181
01:06:32,260 --> 01:06:33,993
Note to self,
1182
01:06:33,994 --> 01:06:36,830
upon a second reading,
my analyst was correct.
1183
01:06:36,831 --> 01:06:40,192
It has everything to do with Pygmalion.
1184
01:07:06,061 --> 01:07:07,595
Dylan?
1185
01:07:07,596 --> 01:07:09,263
Wake up!
1186
01:07:09,264 --> 01:07:10,797
What? What is it?
1187
01:07:10,798 --> 01:07:13,034
I need Jocelyn's phone number.
1188
01:07:17,005 --> 01:07:18,005
Magnifique.
1189
01:07:21,876 --> 01:07:25,044
Love, hate.
1190
01:07:25,045 --> 01:07:27,247
Stop! Don't move. Voilà.
1191
01:07:27,248 --> 01:07:29,217
Superb, superb.
1192
01:07:35,824 --> 01:07:37,156
Huh.
1193
01:07:37,157 --> 01:07:39,940
Okay, let's uh, let's take a break. Hm.
1194
01:07:51,940 --> 01:07:54,642
Hi.
1195
01:07:54,643 --> 01:07:56,776
What happened to your head?
1196
01:07:56,777 --> 01:07:58,846
I got hit by a truck.
1197
01:07:58,847 --> 01:08:00,083
Yeah.
1198
01:08:02,083 --> 01:08:04,118
I like this music selection.
1199
01:08:04,119 --> 01:08:05,685
Whose is it?
1200
01:08:05,686 --> 01:08:07,224
What are you doing here?
1201
01:08:09,224 --> 01:08:12,091
I'm quitting.
1202
01:08:12,092 --> 01:08:13,092
The whole act.
1203
01:08:15,697 --> 01:08:18,732
Well, it wasn't the act that bothered me.
1204
01:08:18,733 --> 01:08:20,368
It was the cover-up.
1205
01:08:21,368 --> 01:08:23,336
Well, the act was the cover-up.
1206
01:08:23,337 --> 01:08:24,904
I have to go back to work.
1207
01:08:24,905 --> 01:08:26,005
Can I have one hour?
1208
01:08:26,006 --> 01:08:28,242
I just need one hour.
1209
01:08:28,243 --> 01:08:29,876
Okay. One hour.
1210
01:08:29,877 --> 01:08:32,287
Yeah, thanks. I'll be right here.
1211
01:08:46,994 --> 01:08:48,461
I hate surprises.
1212
01:08:48,462 --> 01:08:50,041
You're going to like this one.
1213
01:08:54,935 --> 01:08:56,069
I don't understand.
1214
01:08:56,070 --> 01:08:58,130
It's for both of us. Don't get too excited.
1215
01:08:58,330 --> 01:08:59,440
It's just a rental.
1216
01:09:00,240 --> 01:09:02,076
You didn't.
1217
01:09:02,077 --> 01:09:03,253
I did.
1218
01:09:13,253 --> 01:09:14,253
How?
1219
01:09:23,198 --> 01:09:24,883
There's no leaks in the ceiling.
1220
01:09:27,135 --> 01:09:29,206
Got his and her bathrooms.
1221
01:09:31,206 --> 01:09:33,012
This water is not brown.
1222
01:09:39,012 --> 01:09:40,012
What's wrong?
1223
01:09:43,818 --> 01:09:45,221
Nothing.
1224
01:09:47,221 --> 01:09:49,288
So, did you actually go
1225
01:09:49,289 --> 01:09:51,959
to the Picasso retrospective last week?
1226
01:09:51,960 --> 01:09:53,126
It was horrid.
1227
01:09:53,127 --> 01:09:54,161
I know.
1228
01:09:54,162 --> 01:09:57,096
I'm, I'm sorry, but I like his work,
1229
01:09:57,097 --> 01:09:59,465
pretentious and adolescent.
1230
01:09:59,466 --> 01:10:04,371
You know, if he would just take a step back
and have someone...
1231
01:10:04,372 --> 01:10:05,698
Have you ever noticed that the people
1232
01:10:05,898 --> 01:10:07,474
who make fun of people for being pretentious
1233
01:10:07,475 --> 01:10:10,145
are usually the pretentious ones?
1234
01:10:15,115 --> 01:10:19,118
Have you ever noticed how
people only lash out on others
1235
01:10:19,119 --> 01:10:22,355
because they're afraid of what they see
1236
01:10:22,356 --> 01:10:23,962
if they see themselves?
1237
01:10:27,716 --> 01:10:29,295
What if I tell you I love you?
1238
01:10:29,296 --> 01:10:31,244
Does that mean I actually love myself?
1239
01:10:34,034 --> 01:10:35,034
Exactly.
1240
01:10:36,871 --> 01:10:37,871
I love you.
1241
01:10:41,810 --> 01:10:43,454
I love you, too.
1242
01:10:54,454 --> 01:10:56,156
It was at that moment,
1243
01:10:56,157 --> 01:10:59,827
Conrad and Beatrice knew that it was over.
1244
01:10:59,828 --> 01:11:03,162
Beatrice couldn't help but
feel sympathy for Conrad,
1245
01:11:03,163 --> 01:11:06,335
not love, but sympathy.
1246
01:11:07,335 --> 01:11:09,573
One can often get confused for the other.
1247
01:11:12,573 --> 01:11:15,408
As the two exited the station,
1248
01:11:15,409 --> 01:11:18,448
they waved good-bye to
one another as usual.
1249
01:11:20,448 --> 01:11:24,363
It would be the last time they
would ever see each other.
1250
01:11:38,032 --> 01:11:40,533
It seemed there was an
unavoidable distinction
1251
01:11:40,534 --> 01:11:42,435
between Conrad and Beatrice
1252
01:11:42,436 --> 01:11:45,104
that had rendered them incompatible.
1253
01:11:45,105 --> 01:11:47,374
She was a hopeless romantic,
1254
01:11:47,375 --> 01:11:49,545
and he was romantically hopeless.
1255
01:11:50,545 --> 01:11:51,978
By the week's end,
1256
01:11:51,979 --> 01:11:53,613
Conrad had received a telegram
1257
01:11:53,614 --> 01:11:57,117
informing him of his
parents' reconciliation.
1258
01:11:57,118 --> 01:11:59,987
Their week-long divorce had grown tiresome,
1259
01:11:59,988 --> 01:12:03,425
and they were to return
home in two days' time.
1260
01:12:04,425 --> 01:12:07,059
As much as Beatrice had tried,
1261
01:12:07,060 --> 01:12:10,100
she was unable to forget Conrad's actions.
1262
01:12:23,077 --> 01:12:23,943
Note to self,
1263
01:12:23,944 --> 01:12:27,046
see doctor about possible brain tumor.
1264
01:12:27,047 --> 01:12:29,148
Conrad went on to keep the empty apartment
1265
01:12:29,149 --> 01:12:32,655
as a sort of metaphor for
the void left by Beatrice.
1266
01:12:34,655 --> 01:12:36,961
He told no one of its existence.
1267
01:12:39,961 --> 01:12:43,196
It wasn't until years later
that Conrad would realize
1268
01:12:43,197 --> 01:12:45,398
love was just like communism,
1269
01:12:45,399 --> 01:12:49,403
it was a great idea but
never quite worked out.
1270
01:12:49,404 --> 01:12:51,237
Conrad may have told others
1271
01:12:51,238 --> 01:12:53,072
that he was in search of a girlfriend,
1272
01:12:53,073 --> 01:12:56,576
a future wife, but it was merely rhetoric.
1273
01:12:56,577 --> 01:12:59,179
Conrad's search was for an idyllic beauty
1274
01:12:59,180 --> 01:13:01,281
he would never attain.
1275
01:13:01,282 --> 01:13:05,585
Conrad often became attached
to the idea of something
1276
01:13:05,586 --> 01:13:08,356
and not the actual thing itself.
1277
01:13:09,356 --> 01:13:10,491
Back in The Valmont
1278
01:13:10,492 --> 01:13:13,093
with his credit cards once again active,
1279
01:13:13,094 --> 01:13:15,779
Conrad resumed the life he
was accustomed to living,
1280
01:13:16,530 --> 01:13:18,331
but something was different.
1281
01:13:18,332 --> 01:13:20,438
Like this one, right there. Get that one.
1282
01:13:22,002 --> 01:13:23,172
I missed it.
1283
01:13:25,172 --> 01:13:28,064
Tell me why the hell are
we fishing with spears?
1284
01:13:50,064 --> 01:13:51,104
What's wrong?
1285
01:13:56,104 --> 01:13:57,262
It's been a long week.
1286
01:13:58,228 --> 01:14:00,439
With the matriarch of The Valmont household
1287
01:14:00,440 --> 01:14:02,541
once again home,
1288
01:14:02,542 --> 01:14:07,647
Conrad was able to let out a
decade of emotions and fears,
1289
01:14:07,648 --> 01:14:09,683
for she had long been the only person
1290
01:14:09,684 --> 01:14:12,090
he would truly confide in.
1291
01:14:16,090 --> 01:14:18,143
I think there's something wrong with me.
1292
01:14:18,760 --> 01:14:20,760
In an attempt to change his ways...
1293
01:14:20,761 --> 01:14:22,095
Ding dong!
1294
01:14:22,096 --> 01:14:24,108
...Conrad started down
the road to redemption
1295
01:14:24,308 --> 01:14:26,502
with the simple gesture
of quitting cigarettes,
1296
01:14:27,502 --> 01:14:31,203
of getting his father's
Austin-Healey out of hock,
1297
01:14:31,204 --> 01:14:34,608
and on one spring afternoon
while Dylan was out,
1298
01:14:34,609 --> 01:14:36,710
Conrad snuck into his friend's apartment
1299
01:14:36,711 --> 01:14:38,678
to finally repay him.
1300
01:14:38,679 --> 01:14:41,081
He not only monetarily compensated Dylan
1301
01:14:41,082 --> 01:14:42,549
for his loan,
1302
01:14:42,550 --> 01:14:45,419
but also included the keys to his Volvo
1303
01:14:45,420 --> 01:14:49,490
and an inflation-adjusted interest of 20%.
1304
01:14:50,490 --> 01:14:52,291
These are classic symptoms.
1305
01:14:52,292 --> 01:14:54,135
I think you're a closet agoraphobic.
1306
01:14:55,796 --> 01:14:57,565
I'm terminating our sessions.
1307
01:14:58,504 --> 01:15:00,399
Conrad, can we talk about this later?
1308
01:15:00,400 --> 01:15:02,169
I'm in the middle of a session.
1309
01:15:02,170 --> 01:15:03,536
I don't care.
1310
01:15:03,537 --> 01:15:05,104
I'm getting worse.
1311
01:15:05,105 --> 01:15:07,382
Beatrice broke up with me
and I got hit by a truck.
1312
01:15:07,582 --> 01:15:08,675
Look at me, I'm a mess.
1313
01:15:08,676 --> 01:15:10,343
Why do you think that is?
1314
01:15:10,344 --> 01:15:11,812
Your bad advice.
1315
01:15:11,813 --> 01:15:13,846
Conrad, I've been your therapist
1316
01:15:13,847 --> 01:15:15,816
since you were nine years old.
1317
01:15:15,817 --> 01:15:17,684
Indeed, I think it's all that bad advice
1318
01:15:17,685 --> 01:15:20,120
that made me the bad person I am today.
1319
01:15:20,121 --> 01:15:22,322
It's going to take a very long
time to recover from this.
1320
01:15:22,323 --> 01:15:23,323
Farewell.
1321
01:15:29,831 --> 01:15:31,516
Perhaps he had the wrong office.
1322
01:15:34,202 --> 01:15:35,602
Hypothetically speaking,
1323
01:15:35,603 --> 01:15:38,138
do you think someone could
have a Napoleonic complex
1324
01:15:38,139 --> 01:15:41,707
without being particularly short?
1325
01:15:41,708 --> 01:15:43,777
I don't believe so.
1326
01:15:43,778 --> 01:15:46,679
What would you call this
hypothetical person then?
1327
01:15:46,680 --> 01:15:47,680
An egoist?
1328
01:15:48,515 --> 01:15:50,850
Egoist.
1329
01:15:50,851 --> 01:15:53,421
I think I'm an egoist.
1330
01:15:54,421 --> 01:15:56,421
I've never told you this before, but...
1331
01:15:58,792 --> 01:16:01,134
you're a horrible writer.
1332
01:16:06,134 --> 01:16:07,136
I know.
1333
01:16:11,171 --> 01:16:12,272
After several years
1334
01:16:12,273 --> 01:16:15,308
of deliberation and public speculation,
1335
01:16:15,309 --> 01:16:17,836
Conrad had finally finished
his sophomore effort.
1336
01:16:19,814 --> 01:16:21,747
His inability to complete the novel
1337
01:16:21,748 --> 01:16:24,718
had simply stemmed from
his lack of understanding
1338
01:16:24,719 --> 01:16:27,554
its central character, of course.
1339
01:16:27,555 --> 01:16:30,559
The central character was himself.
1340
01:16:31,516 --> 01:16:33,359
The book was published in the spring
1341
01:16:33,360 --> 01:16:35,430
and received mixed reviews.
1342
01:16:36,430 --> 01:16:39,532
He proceeded to wave good-bye
to Abigail as if routine,
1343
01:16:39,533 --> 01:16:43,370
for he was convinced that
this was not the last time
1344
01:16:43,371 --> 01:16:45,304
that they would ever see each other.
1345
01:16:45,305 --> 01:16:47,206
Harold went on to keep the empty apartment
1346
01:16:47,207 --> 01:16:51,377
as sort of a metaphor for
the void left by Abigail.
1347
01:16:51,378 --> 01:16:55,317
He told no one of its existence.
1348
01:16:59,854 --> 01:17:00,894
Thank you.
1349
01:17:06,638 --> 01:17:08,428
How do you respond to the criticism
1350
01:17:08,429 --> 01:17:10,663
that your novel is inherently derivative
1351
01:17:10,664 --> 01:17:13,737
of the works of Fitzgerald
and Edith Wharton?
1352
01:17:16,737 --> 01:17:18,006
Thank you.
1353
01:17:19,006 --> 01:17:21,273
Mr. Valmont, I'm sorry,
but I found the book
1354
01:17:21,274 --> 01:17:23,276
and the central character adolescent
1355
01:17:23,277 --> 01:17:25,711
and his problems grossly inconsequential
1356
01:17:25,712 --> 01:17:27,581
by modern social standards.
1357
01:17:27,582 --> 01:17:28,814
Don't you find his change at the end
1358
01:17:28,815 --> 01:17:32,452
slightly contrived and frankly, sophomoric.
1359
01:17:32,453 --> 01:17:34,587
I completely disagree.
I find him quite likable
1360
01:17:34,588 --> 01:17:36,895
and his change rather significant.
1361
01:17:40,839 --> 01:17:42,261
At a matinee performance of
1362
01:17:42,262 --> 01:17:43,578
Les Caprices de Marianne,
1363
01:17:44,408 --> 01:17:46,566
the play which the once tightly knit group
1364
01:17:46,567 --> 01:17:49,368
had all seen together,
Dylan ran into Beatrice
1365
01:17:49,369 --> 01:17:52,706
for the first time since
her split with Conrad.
1366
01:17:52,707 --> 01:17:55,875
This was not a coincidence,
however, for each had
1367
01:17:55,876 --> 01:17:59,446
mysteriously received a
ticket two days prior.
1368
01:17:59,447 --> 01:18:02,314
Conrad had sent the tickets
in an attempt to pay penance
1369
01:18:02,315 --> 01:18:04,783
for his actions the previous week.
1370
01:18:04,784 --> 01:18:07,586
The two then went to a small
bar in the West Village
1371
01:18:07,587 --> 01:18:09,788
to speak about the play.
1372
01:18:09,789 --> 01:18:12,459
They both enjoyed it and had
seen it with a nostalgia
1373
01:18:12,460 --> 01:18:14,827
for their old times together.
1374
01:18:14,828 --> 01:18:16,996
They made love that night
1375
01:18:16,997 --> 01:18:20,433
and have been together ever since.
1376
01:18:20,434 --> 01:18:21,934
Dylan finally read
1377
01:18:21,935 --> 01:18:25,705
Jane Austin's pre-Victorian
classic Sense and Sensibility.
1378
01:18:25,706 --> 01:18:28,841
He found it neither
sentimental nor unrealistic,
1379
01:18:28,842 --> 01:18:30,613
but actually quite relatable.
1380
01:18:32,613 --> 01:18:35,715
Soon after their encounter
outside the Hudson Playhouse,
1381
01:18:35,716 --> 01:18:37,817
Beatrice gave up her modeling exploits
1382
01:18:37,818 --> 01:18:41,054
and formed a jazz ensemble with Dylan.
1383
01:18:41,055 --> 01:18:44,390
They achieved moderate
success and were happy.
1384
01:18:44,391 --> 01:18:47,596
Consequently, they both put on 15 pounds.
1385
01:18:49,596 --> 01:18:52,564
Conrad and Dylan continued
their weekly conversations
1386
01:18:52,565 --> 01:18:54,634
over squash,
1387
01:18:54,635 --> 01:18:57,372
and for the first time, Dylan won.
1388
01:18:58,372 --> 01:19:01,707
Conrad saw this as a sign of change.
1389
01:19:01,708 --> 01:19:05,548
Dylan, however, merely felt
a sense of satisfaction.
1390
01:19:08,548 --> 01:19:12,085
Conrad would go on to donate a
large portion of his wealth
1391
01:19:12,086 --> 01:19:15,822
to various charities and
philanthropic endeavors.
1392
01:19:15,823 --> 01:19:18,758
Unfortunately, it took losing everything
1393
01:19:18,759 --> 01:19:20,593
for Conrad to finally appreciate
1394
01:19:20,594 --> 01:19:23,897
the economic stability he once had.
1395
01:19:23,898 --> 01:19:27,104
He wasn't going to take
it for granted this time.
1396
01:19:29,739 --> 01:19:31,371
I really despise the whole idea
1397
01:19:31,372 --> 01:19:34,541
that by being over privileged
and well educated,
1398
01:19:34,542 --> 01:19:37,010
that one has to live up to
certain lofty expectations.
1399
01:19:37,011 --> 01:19:39,946
For one, you have to live
under the proverbial shadow
1400
01:19:39,947 --> 01:19:42,014
of said father and-or namesake.
1401
01:19:42,015 --> 01:19:45,984
Two, lofty expectations can
only lead to failure, hm?
1402
01:19:45,985 --> 01:19:49,755
And three, more scientifically
and mathematically speaking,
1403
01:19:49,756 --> 01:19:51,491
if your parents were a great success,
1404
01:19:51,492 --> 01:19:55,561
I think a betting man would say that the
chances of lightning striking twice,
1405
01:19:55,761 --> 01:19:58,598
especially in consecutive generations,
is very slim.
1406
01:19:58,599 --> 01:20:02,069
You do realize you're
talking to your chauffeur.
1407
01:20:03,069 --> 01:20:04,069
Touché.
1408
01:20:05,499 --> 01:20:06,973
After the lukewarm reception
1409
01:20:06,974 --> 01:20:08,073
of his second novel,
1410
01:20:08,074 --> 01:20:12,144
Conrad began to spend
more time in the country,
1411
01:20:12,145 --> 01:20:15,482
to focus on the work,
1412
01:20:15,483 --> 01:20:19,385
for it was only there that he felt at ease.
1413
01:20:19,386 --> 01:20:22,154
It appeared Conrad's allergies
to grass and clean air
1414
01:20:22,155 --> 01:20:25,157
had been completely psychosomatic.
1415
01:20:25,158 --> 01:20:28,495
He began to reflect back
on his week with Beatrice
1416
01:20:28,496 --> 01:20:30,095
and thought of the old adage
1417
01:20:30,096 --> 01:20:32,398
"Tis better to have loved and lost
1418
01:20:32,399 --> 01:20:35,635
"than to have never loved at all."
1419
01:20:35,636 --> 01:20:38,071
Conrad reluctantly agreed,
1420
01:20:38,072 --> 01:20:41,474
for he still thought of Beatrice often.
1421
01:20:41,475 --> 01:20:45,044
At the ripe age of 42,
1422
01:20:45,045 --> 01:20:48,500
Conrad Valmont was finally growing up.
104280
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.