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MAN: Right, sorry,
so the show's on the 16th.
2
00:00:21,320 --> 00:00:23,120
And what... Is it a festival, is it?
3
00:00:26,719 --> 00:00:28,359
How many people
would you expect from...
4
00:00:28,480 --> 00:00:30,879
From start to finish, how many people
would you expect?
5
00:00:33,840 --> 00:00:35,359
We'll say 4,000?
6
00:00:35,439 --> 00:00:37,200
Keep it going.
7
00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:40,119
No worries. Now, is alcohol being
served at the event?
8
00:00:42,079 --> 00:00:44,640
No, it's all being charged.
It's a bar, is it?
9
00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:47,840
Uh, is there food...
is there food being served?
10
00:00:49,479 --> 00:00:51,560
Good quality food,
or probably just junk food?
11
00:00:51,679 --> 00:00:54,079
Chips and... pizzas. Yeah.
12
00:00:55,880 --> 00:01:00,079
And, uh, have you got any
Indonesian foods or curries?
13
00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:02,439
You have? Alright.
14
00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:05,120
Well, normally, if it was
a non-drinking event,
15
00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:06,599
as far as alcohol,
16
00:01:06,719 --> 00:01:08,439
and there was
no food or curries,
17
00:01:08,560 --> 00:01:10,000
for 4,000 people for 10 hours,
18
00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:12,879
you'd have five male
and five female blocks.
19
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,879
But you've got alcohol
being served,
20
00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:19,480
as well as the food and you've got
curries in there as well,
21
00:01:19,560 --> 00:01:21,200
which does make
a bit of a difference.
22
00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:26,200
And on the, uh... on the solid
to water-based
23
00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:29,519
or liquid waste ratio,
24
00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:31,040
you've got a 4 to 1.
25
00:01:31,159 --> 00:01:33,760
So it's basically
four liquid to one solid.
26
00:01:33,879 --> 00:01:36,640
That's the piss and shit ratio, yeah.
27
00:01:45,599 --> 00:01:48,519
People... I must admit,
when people find out what I do,
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00:01:48,640 --> 00:01:51,200
I mean, when they ask
what I do, I say I'm a plumber,
29
00:01:51,280 --> 00:01:53,359
and they say, "Well,
that'd be pretty interesting",
30
00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:54,840
and I say,
"Well, not that interesting,
31
00:01:54,959 --> 00:01:56,760
" 'cause all I plumb
is shithouses."
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00:01:56,879 --> 00:01:59,000
As you can see,
we've got a lot of blocks here.
33
00:01:59,120 --> 00:02:00,519
We've just gotta find
one more combo unit
34
00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:02,040
and we're on our way.
35
00:02:03,840 --> 00:02:05,799
Where is the bastard?
36
00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:08,639
How do you lose a 40ft toilet?
37
00:02:08,759 --> 00:02:11,520
Yeah, most people...
they always freak out
38
00:02:11,599 --> 00:02:13,719
because, of course, they think
you're handling the stuff.
39
00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:15,960
They think... I don't know
whether they think I eat it
40
00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:18,080
or whether they think
I scrub it on meself.
41
00:02:18,159 --> 00:02:19,560
You know, I plumb it.
42
00:02:19,680 --> 00:02:22,560
See? Here's another
classic example.
43
00:02:22,680 --> 00:02:24,599
Someone having
a 2-inch arsehole
44
00:02:24,719 --> 00:02:27,280
and us only having installed
1-inch piping.
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00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:29,479
As much as people think
you're covered in shit and piss,
46
00:02:29,599 --> 00:02:30,479
you're not.
47
00:02:30,599 --> 00:02:32,639
It's 85% of it's water.
48
00:02:32,759 --> 00:02:36,039
85 and in some instances
up to 90% water.
49
00:02:36,159 --> 00:02:37,520
I know that leaves around
50
00:02:37,599 --> 00:02:39,560
about 10% to 15%
of shit and piss,
51
00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:42,120
but there's some chemicals
in there that work on that.
52
00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:45,319
See, this is what we spend
half our time cleaning up.
53
00:02:45,439 --> 00:02:46,800
How hard is it?
54
00:02:46,919 --> 00:02:49,479
I mean, I don't mean to be
straight up about it,
55
00:02:49,599 --> 00:02:50,960
but, I mean, there's a urinal -
56
00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:53,360
you stand here
and, being a male,
57
00:02:53,479 --> 00:02:55,800
you've got a prong on you
which points forward,
58
00:02:55,919 --> 00:02:58,240
so I don't understand
how they get it under their feet.
59
00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:00,520
They must point it down.
60
00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:02,800
The funny part is,
parents look at me, you know,
61
00:03:02,919 --> 00:03:05,080
and say, "Well, that's not
much of a job, is it?
62
00:03:05,199 --> 00:03:06,680
"Did you wish
you did something else?"
63
00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:08,800
I said, "Well, you had kids.
64
00:03:08,919 --> 00:03:11,840
"You spent the first two years
handling their shit.
65
00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:13,560
"And you weren't
getting paid for that."
66
00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:15,719
And they're...they shit green.
67
00:03:15,840 --> 00:03:17,439
Only thing
that's supposed to be green
68
00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:20,319
is apples, pears and Martians.
69
00:03:23,919 --> 00:03:25,400
Stay there.
70
00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:26,439
Yo!
71
00:03:26,560 --> 00:03:27,960
That's the one.
72
00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:29,919
Pretty lonely old job, this.
73
00:03:30,039 --> 00:03:32,000
We're here before
the crowds get here
74
00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:33,800
and we're the last to leave.
75
00:03:34,879 --> 00:03:36,840
We miss out on all the fun,
don't we, Alf?
76
00:03:36,960 --> 00:03:37,879
Yeah.
77
00:03:40,719 --> 00:03:42,919
Yeah, shut her off, Alfie,
she's all done, mate.
78
00:03:47,759 --> 00:03:50,680
Just make sure you stock up
all the poo tickets, boys.
79
00:03:50,800 --> 00:03:52,879
This one's gonna get
a flogging today.
80
00:03:55,759 --> 00:03:59,000
Yeah, well, this is where most of the
paperwork gets done,
81
00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:00,000
obviously.
82
00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:04,560
This is the... realistically, the sciatic
nerve of Splashdown.
83
00:04:05,639 --> 00:04:08,120
What we do, normally
it's corporate bathroom rentals.
84
00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:09,759
I mean, at the end of the day,
85
00:04:09,879 --> 00:04:13,840
it's just a fancy way of having
somewhere to shit, isn't it?
86
00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:15,960
Having a nice place to purge.
87
00:04:16,079 --> 00:04:17,680
But, uh, I mean,
other companies...
88
00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:19,560
Up in Sydney there's one
that has a slogan -
89
00:04:19,680 --> 00:04:22,040
`We're number one
with your number twos'.
90
00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:24,639
I prefer not to spend
too long in the office.
91
00:04:24,759 --> 00:04:26,120
I prefer working outside,
92
00:04:26,240 --> 00:04:28,360
but this is obviously where the real
business end gets done,
93
00:04:28,480 --> 00:04:29,399
so to speak.
94
00:04:42,759 --> 00:04:44,519
Doesn't matter
how big the event is
95
00:04:44,639 --> 00:04:46,120
or how important the event is,
96
00:04:46,240 --> 00:04:48,319
be it a corporate event
or a concert,
97
00:04:48,439 --> 00:04:50,319
you would think that
we'd be the first thing
98
00:04:50,439 --> 00:04:51,800
that people would think of
99
00:04:51,920 --> 00:04:53,879
because it's the one thing
everyone does on most days -
100
00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:56,879
a la me, 10am, every morning,
regular as clockwork.
101
00:04:58,199 --> 00:05:00,360
It's never the first thing
on their mind,
102
00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:03,680
when, realistically, it should be
the first thing they think of,
103
00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:05,240
because if we don't turn up,
104
00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:07,360
grab the business
and get going with it,
105
00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:09,319
well, they really are in the shit,
aren't they?
106
00:05:41,720 --> 00:05:44,399
We've got a bit of a drive here
107
00:05:44,519 --> 00:05:46,399
because we've gotta
drop this load off
108
00:05:46,519 --> 00:05:49,399
at mama and papa poo
in Werribee.
109
00:05:54,279 --> 00:05:56,959
Funny thing is, a lot of people
use the word 'shit' now
110
00:05:57,079 --> 00:05:59,920
of course as an abusive word,
you know, as a swear word -
111
00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:01,920
the sort of word you wanna
keep away from kiddies.
112
00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:04,360
But the funny part is,
where it came from
113
00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:07,600
was when they started to transport
manure in the ships
114
00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:09,720
so they could use it
to fertilise gardens.
115
00:06:09,839 --> 00:06:12,120
Problem was, moisture
would get in from the boat,
116
00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:13,600
into the bottom of the boat
117
00:06:13,720 --> 00:06:16,560
and mix up with some of the manure
they were transporting,
118
00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:19,560
and it would start to ferment
and it would cause a gas,
119
00:06:19,680 --> 00:06:21,040
and the problem was
120
00:06:21,160 --> 00:06:22,839
if someone went down there
with a candle
121
00:06:22,959 --> 00:06:25,240
or lit a match or had a pipe
or something down there,
122
00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:27,920
sometimes it ignited and there was an
explosion on the boat.
123
00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:30,399
After that,
they put all the crap in boxes
124
00:06:30,519 --> 00:06:33,800
and it had 'SHIT'
written on the side of the box
125
00:06:33,920 --> 00:06:36,480
and that stood for
'Store High In Transit'.
126
00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:38,160
And that's where
it got its name from.
127
00:06:38,279 --> 00:06:39,800
So... I don't know
whether there's any truth
128
00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:41,279
to that story or not,
129
00:06:41,399 --> 00:06:44,000
but it's a pretty elaborate,
you know, lie.
130
00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:47,120
Bit of a long-winded set-up if
someone's made that story up.
131
00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:48,639
I'm going with it.
132
00:06:49,959 --> 00:06:53,279
Yeah, so, I'm having to work
a little bit of overtime tonight
133
00:06:53,399 --> 00:06:56,480
just to get a couple
of extra toilets ready.
134
00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:58,480
We've got a heap of them
going out next week.
135
00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:01,279
As you can see, the kids...
I don't know what they do.
136
00:07:01,399 --> 00:07:03,720
They've broken through
that one. They do all sorts...
137
00:07:03,839 --> 00:07:06,040
Oh, have a look at this one.
You won't believe this.
138
00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:08,480
Have a look at this. This one
I replaced this morning.
139
00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:10,800
Look at that! Eh?
140
00:07:10,920 --> 00:07:13,240
What kind of curry
has that bloke been eating?
141
00:07:13,360 --> 00:07:16,519
Devil's curry.
Hell's teeth, I tell you.
142
00:07:16,639 --> 00:07:20,000
I've never understood why
people all carry on about it.
143
00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:23,079
I... I enjoy a good crap,
to be quite honest.
144
00:07:23,199 --> 00:07:25,360
I not only enjoy it, I love it.
145
00:07:25,480 --> 00:07:28,279
I don't think
it's all pain and anger.
146
00:07:28,399 --> 00:07:32,000
Me, personally, I sit on a toilet
for 20-odd minutes,
147
00:07:32,120 --> 00:07:33,480
as most men can.
148
00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:35,079
Do you know,
it's an interesting fact,
149
00:07:35,199 --> 00:07:36,560
as far as smells,
150
00:07:36,680 --> 00:07:38,800
apparently your body
only is in shock -
151
00:07:38,920 --> 00:07:40,360
and sometimes it is shock -
152
00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:43,160
for about the first 7 to 12 seconds or
something,
153
00:07:43,279 --> 00:07:45,240
and after that you get
used to it very quickly.
154
00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:47,199
That's why a man can read
155
00:07:47,319 --> 00:07:49,879
a newspaper or magazine
from front to back,
156
00:07:49,959 --> 00:07:53,120
you know, in the toilet, in his own
smell, and not notice it.
157
00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:54,920
Mind you,
the next person that walks in
158
00:07:55,040 --> 00:07:56,639
will think they've been smacked in the
head
159
00:07:56,759 --> 00:07:57,639
with a poo bat.
160
00:07:57,759 --> 00:07:59,759
But, uh, I don't know,
you know...
161
00:07:59,879 --> 00:08:03,079
If a woman walks in after you,
kill 'em. Knock 'em in half.
162
00:08:03,199 --> 00:08:04,639
I've always understood
that people...
163
00:08:04,759 --> 00:08:06,759
I know everyone does get
embarrassed by taking a crap.
164
00:08:06,879 --> 00:08:09,439
You wouldn't wanna be doing it
in the middle of Bourke Street,
165
00:08:09,519 --> 00:08:11,040
butt-naked,
trying to poo into a cup.
166
00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:13,959
I mean, even dogs...
if you watch a dog crap,
167
00:08:14,079 --> 00:08:15,519
even a dog's embarrassed
to do poos.
168
00:08:15,639 --> 00:08:17,000
You know when
they're doing a poo,
169
00:08:17,120 --> 00:08:19,439
they're all bent over like they're
trying to root a cricket ball,
170
00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:20,920
but even they... even they
get embarrassed.
171
00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:23,000
And that's a dog.
And they'll eat it!
172
00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:35,000
This is, uh... What am I
down to? Four strings.
173
00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:37,519
I was given this guitar
by a mate of mine.
174
00:08:37,639 --> 00:08:39,240
He used to play a bit of music.
175
00:08:39,360 --> 00:08:42,080
And he had a bit of an accident.
176
00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:44,159
And, uh... his job,
he was working,
177
00:08:44,279 --> 00:08:45,960
got his hand crushed
in a machine.
178
00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:48,080
He couldn't play
the guitar anymore, so...
179
00:08:48,200 --> 00:08:49,559
..he gave me this.
180
00:08:49,639 --> 00:08:51,720
And I always swore
I'd learn to play the guitar
181
00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:54,039
but I haven't really learnt.
182
00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:57,039
The only thing I've learnt is that
if I hit the strings really hard,
183
00:08:57,159 --> 00:08:58,559
they break.
184
00:09:07,159 --> 00:09:11,039
I think it takes a certain
kind of person to do what I do
185
00:09:11,159 --> 00:09:13,159
and it's just about having
a thick skin.
186
00:09:13,279 --> 00:09:15,200
No-one's ever impressed
with what you do.
187
00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:16,679
No-one's ever fascinated
188
00:09:16,759 --> 00:09:19,120
or no-one ever wants to come
and see what you do, or...
189
00:09:19,240 --> 00:09:20,720
I imagine, if you were a fireman,
190
00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:23,399
all the kids would want to jump
on the back of the truck
191
00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:24,840
and follow you to a fire.
192
00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:26,679
There's gonna be no kids
keen to do that.
193
00:09:26,759 --> 00:09:29,519
I don't do it for the glory.
I don't do it to impress people.
194
00:09:29,639 --> 00:09:32,279
It's a job. But, you know,
it's... it's what I know.
195
00:09:32,399 --> 00:09:33,919
It's my trade.
196
00:09:34,039 --> 00:09:35,759
And I actually think
I'm pretty good at it.
197
00:09:35,879 --> 00:09:37,360
That's not bad stuff, that.
198
00:09:39,519 --> 00:09:43,200
As you can see, I've got
a few different aftershaves,
199
00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:45,799
which obviously,
in my line of work,
200
00:09:45,879 --> 00:09:48,759
doesn't hurt to have
a few of those on hand.
201
00:09:48,879 --> 00:09:50,279
A bit of an arsenal.
202
00:10:07,399 --> 00:10:10,559
These are, uh... a mate of mine,
203
00:10:10,639 --> 00:10:13,759
he's over in Japan
at the moment.
204
00:10:13,879 --> 00:10:15,240
You should have
a look at these.
205
00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:17,960
These are pictures...
they're pictures of a toilet.
206
00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:20,080
They must stand over it.
207
00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:21,879
God knows
how they keep that clean.
208
00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:24,519
Over here, you sit right on
the pan and they still miss it.
209
00:10:24,639 --> 00:10:26,000
How would you be...?
210
00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:27,480
There's Robbo's feet there. See?
211
00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:30,200
Look at this thing here. It's out of 'Star
Wars' or something.
212
00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:31,679
This is the toilet here.
213
00:10:31,759 --> 00:10:33,159
And see the armrest?
214
00:10:33,279 --> 00:10:35,600
That's the control panel for it.
215
00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:37,759
He hasn't explained
what they all are.
216
00:10:37,879 --> 00:10:40,159
But it's got
two different settings
217
00:10:40,279 --> 00:10:43,200
for a water jet
to shoot up your date -
218
00:10:43,320 --> 00:10:44,919
must be to wash it
or something.
219
00:10:45,039 --> 00:10:47,879
This must be the heater,
or God knows what that is.
220
00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:49,440
And, jeez, look at this.
221
00:10:49,519 --> 00:10:50,919
This has got a speed dial.
222
00:10:51,039 --> 00:10:52,399
And I don't know what that is,
223
00:10:52,519 --> 00:10:55,559
whether it's a television
or it takes an X-ray of your...
224
00:10:55,679 --> 00:10:57,960
You know, I tell you what,
this'll be the future.
225
00:10:58,080 --> 00:11:00,919
We'll all be sitting
on space-age shitters.
226
00:11:01,039 --> 00:11:03,279
Not one single photo
of his holiday trip.
227
00:11:03,399 --> 00:11:05,159
I wouldn't have a clue
where he's been,
228
00:11:05,279 --> 00:11:06,919
but I know he's had two craps.
229
00:11:28,519 --> 00:11:30,200
MAN: What's the go
with putting the toilets
230
00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:31,679
outside of the venue?
231
00:11:31,799 --> 00:11:33,919
Well, that was where we were
told to put it originally.
232
00:11:34,039 --> 00:11:35,399
Not on the drawing.
233
00:11:35,519 --> 00:11:37,320
Well... even though
it's on the outside of the fence,
234
00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:38,799
the fence has been moved
235
00:11:38,919 --> 00:11:40,639
from where I was told
it was gonna be.
236
00:11:40,759 --> 00:11:41,879
I can't move it now.
237
00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:43,919
You'd have to be
Andre the Giant to lift it up.
238
00:11:44,039 --> 00:11:45,559
It's a couple of tonne a unit.
239
00:11:45,679 --> 00:11:48,279
Well, can we get it sorted
by the end of today, or...?
240
00:11:48,399 --> 00:11:50,039
Well, to do it,
I'll have to unplumb it,
241
00:11:50,159 --> 00:11:51,519
turn the water off, get a crane.
242
00:11:51,639 --> 00:11:53,000
I mean, I can have a go.
243
00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:54,799
You want me to ring the boss?
- Yes.
244
00:11:54,919 --> 00:11:56,840
Alright, I'll ring Glenn
and I'll come and see you.
245
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:58,480
Are you at the manager's hut?
Yep.
246
00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:01,039
Or I'm on a two-way.
Just please get hold of me.
247
00:12:01,159 --> 00:12:02,720
Alright. Done.
Thank you.
248
00:12:02,840 --> 00:12:05,120
Jeez, this'll be great.
He wants us to move the toilet.
249
00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:08,039
Well, they reckon we've put
the toilet in the wrong spot.
250
00:12:09,399 --> 00:12:11,000
Well, I didn't drop it off -
Tom did.
251
00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:12,759
But it's just outside
the front fence,
252
00:12:12,879 --> 00:12:15,200
which is where I thought
it was supposed to go.
253
00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:17,480
MAN ON P.A.:
The F-111 lands...
254
00:12:20,399 --> 00:12:23,600
( MOBILE PHONE RINGS )
255
00:12:23,720 --> 00:12:25,519
This could be
a little bit colourful.
256
00:12:25,639 --> 00:12:28,039
That's from me... me ex-wife.
257
00:12:28,159 --> 00:12:30,360
We're separated.
258
00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:34,320
Apparently, me little boy's
putting on a bit of a show.
259
00:12:36,399 --> 00:12:38,320
I have to give her a ring.
I won't be...
260
00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:39,840
Yeah. Don't yell in the phone.
261
00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:42,960
What...what...
what has he called you?
262
00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:46,039
Oh, jeez. Well, do you want to
put him on the phone to me?
263
00:12:46,159 --> 00:12:47,759
Yeah, well, oh,
it's a bit different.
264
00:12:47,879 --> 00:12:50,519
I'm a grown-up, mate.
You're still a boy.
265
00:12:50,639 --> 00:12:53,200
Yeah, well, you're gonna have to pull
your head in a bit.
266
00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:56,600
You can't be carrying on
like a bloody raw prawn.
267
00:12:56,720 --> 00:12:58,240
Alright.
268
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:01,480
Yeah, well, maybe just
steady on a bit, eh?
269
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:03,279
Just try and pull it up a bit.
270
00:13:03,399 --> 00:13:05,600
No, I understand that, but she's still
your mother, mate.
271
00:13:05,720 --> 00:13:07,279
It doesn't matter what I say.
272
00:13:07,399 --> 00:13:10,679
Yeah, I know I said that, but
we were a bit heated that day.
273
00:13:10,799 --> 00:13:13,000
There's no need to be repeating that.
274
00:13:13,120 --> 00:13:15,519
Alright, well, just try
and settle down a bit.
275
00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:21,720
No, mate, the first time
I ever saw
276
00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:23,679
Glenn shove his hand
down a bowl,
277
00:13:23,799 --> 00:13:26,080
and that's the owner
of this company,
278
00:13:26,200 --> 00:13:27,600
turned up in a suit, mate,
279
00:13:27,720 --> 00:13:29,399
he ripped his shirt off,
280
00:13:29,519 --> 00:13:31,200
straight into the shit.
281
00:13:33,279 --> 00:13:34,759
And I got there, and I said,
282
00:13:34,879 --> 00:13:36,399
"There's fuckin' a man
after my own heart
283
00:13:36,519 --> 00:13:37,879
"that'll do anything."
284
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:39,360
His arm's into it.
285
00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:40,960
It's nice to have
a boss that knows
286
00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:42,159
what we're going
through at last.
287
00:13:42,279 --> 00:13:45,159
Do you know, I sometimes feel
a bit lucky that I've got this job.
288
00:13:45,279 --> 00:13:46,720
In this job, I must admit,
289
00:13:46,840 --> 00:13:49,120
I've had a chance to see
some great stuff.
290
00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:51,000
And I work with
a good bunch of blokes.
291
00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:54,639
And, you know, that's more than
anyone can ask for.
292
00:13:54,759 --> 00:13:57,799
I tell you what, Robbo, do you mind if I
lob here tonight?
293
00:13:57,919 --> 00:14:00,639
I'll have a few more beers.
I don't give a shit at all, mate.
294
00:14:00,759 --> 00:14:02,240
Eh, you can even
stay in that bed,
295
00:14:02,360 --> 00:14:03,840
and I'll make a bed
up for myself...
296
00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:06,639
No, no. I'm not gonna stay in your bed,
Robbo. It's your joint.
297
00:14:06,759 --> 00:14:08,559
Ah, well, there's
no problems, brother.
298
00:14:08,679 --> 00:14:10,960
There's a lounge there.
There's a bed there.
299
00:14:11,080 --> 00:14:13,399
Hey, no worries.
You've got the whole lot.
300
00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:25,200
You know, the funny part is
301
00:14:25,320 --> 00:14:27,480
everyone will deny the fact
that they look at their poo,
302
00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:28,960
but everyone does.
303
00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:30,600
The ancient Greeks...
304
00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:32,320
Cop this one.
305
00:14:32,440 --> 00:14:35,960
The ancient Greeks,
they used to use poo, back in...
306
00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:39,600
I mean, talking 2,000 years ago,
when Christ was alive.
307
00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:41,840
They used to look at their poo,
or people's poo
308
00:14:41,960 --> 00:14:44,120
to forecast the future.
309
00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:46,360
Mind you, if they'd seen
some of the poo I've seen
310
00:14:46,480 --> 00:14:48,360
at some of the festivals,
the future looks pretty bleak.
311
00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:50,360
But they used to use it
to forecast the future,
312
00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:51,879
back 2,000 years ago.
313
00:14:54,799 --> 00:14:56,759
Hey, Darren, have you got power to
those toilets
314
00:14:56,879 --> 00:14:57,759
across there yet?
315
00:14:57,879 --> 00:14:59,679
This is the busiest time of year.
316
00:14:59,799 --> 00:15:01,159
This is the crazy time.
317
00:15:01,279 --> 00:15:02,759
Obviously,
when the sun comes out,
318
00:15:02,879 --> 00:15:04,240
every bastard has a festival,
319
00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:07,080
and we get flogged
like crooked dogs in a...
320
00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:08,559
It's a mongrel.
321
00:15:08,679 --> 00:15:11,799
It just goes bonkers. It's as silly
as a bum full of Smarties.
322
00:15:14,120 --> 00:15:17,799
I often sing
'Advance Australia Fair'.
323
00:15:17,919 --> 00:15:21,720
There's nothing wrong with
having a bit of national pride.
324
00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:24,159
Problem is,
when I first heard it,
325
00:15:24,279 --> 00:15:27,159
I used to think the song was,
the words were,
326
00:15:27,279 --> 00:15:29,399
"Australians all
let us ring Joyce,
327
00:15:29,519 --> 00:15:31,639
" 'cause she is young
and free."
328
00:15:31,759 --> 00:15:34,879
So, obviously, I was making
a goose of myself,
329
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:39,080
right up until the old man
set me straight on the words.
330
00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:40,879
I sing it right now.
331
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:45,159
"Australians all
let us ring Joyce."
332
00:15:45,279 --> 00:15:47,120
God.
333
00:15:51,039 --> 00:15:54,200
You know, I get to see
some great stuff doing this job.
334
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:55,679
And it's never boring.
335
00:15:55,799 --> 00:15:58,039
But, I mean, you know,
I hear of people all the time
336
00:15:58,159 --> 00:15:59,039
and you read about it -
337
00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:00,519
people sitting behind
their desk at work
338
00:16:00,639 --> 00:16:02,799
terrified that the next day
they're gonna be out of work.
339
00:16:02,919 --> 00:16:04,639
Well, that's not something
I've ever gotta worry about.
340
00:16:04,759 --> 00:16:06,120
You know, it's not like
my business
341
00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:07,799
is gonna dry up
overnight, is it?
342
00:16:07,919 --> 00:16:09,279
How you been? Well?
Excellent.
343
00:16:09,399 --> 00:16:10,759
I haven't seen you forever.
344
00:16:10,879 --> 00:16:12,399
I'll catch up with you there.
OK.
345
00:16:12,519 --> 00:16:13,919
See you, mate.
See you.
346
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:16,360
That's a mate from school.
347
00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:17,960
That's a guy
I went to school with.
348
00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:19,399
That's Macka.
349
00:16:20,559 --> 00:16:22,240
I must admit, I thought
you'd got a bit taller
350
00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:23,240
since I'd seen you,
351
00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:24,720
but you've got
these bloody boots on.
352
00:16:24,840 --> 00:16:26,559
They're different from the footy
boots you strapped on
353
00:16:26,679 --> 00:16:28,399
when we were at school, mate.
354
00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:36,080
There's not too much I regret
about doing this job.
355
00:16:36,200 --> 00:16:37,559
I think I've worked
a lot of hours,
356
00:16:37,679 --> 00:16:39,240
and it's probably
aged me a bit.
357
00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:42,320
You know, some of my mates
reckon I'm looking a bit worn.
358
00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:43,799
Well, I lost my missus.
359
00:16:43,919 --> 00:16:45,399
I lost her out of it.
360
00:16:45,519 --> 00:16:47,919
That was... Well, I didn't
lose her. I know where she is.
361
00:16:48,039 --> 00:16:49,399
She just left me, but, uh...
362
00:16:49,519 --> 00:16:52,960
..it bit me on the arse pretty hard when
she was leaving me.
363
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:55,840
You know, it was one tax l
didn't expect to pay in this job,
364
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:57,320
and that was losing me missus.
365
00:16:57,440 --> 00:16:59,639
But when you spend more time
with other people's poo
366
00:16:59,759 --> 00:17:02,039
than you do your own wife,
you've gotta pay the penalty.
367
00:17:02,159 --> 00:17:06,240
MAN: Do you know that
70% of marriages fail? 70%.
368
00:17:06,319 --> 00:17:08,640
I mean, you hear of so many stories of
that whole...
369
00:17:08,759 --> 00:17:09,720
..that same scenario.
370
00:17:09,799 --> 00:17:11,279
You know, you get married
371
00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:13,279
and a week later
they break up or something
372
00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:14,759
or, you know, it doesn't work.
373
00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:16,400
Or, you know, sex doesn't
happen or something.
374
00:17:16,519 --> 00:17:18,559
Or, you know,
she goes off you or something.
375
00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:20,599
Or, you know, the parents
are around every day
376
00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:21,599
or something.
377
00:17:21,720 --> 00:17:24,400
Or you can't support them,
give them what they want,
378
00:17:24,519 --> 00:17:25,960
because they came from,
you know,
379
00:17:26,079 --> 00:17:27,759
a wealthier background
or something than you,
380
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:30,039
and you're wishing
that you could, you know,
381
00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:32,319
support it more than that,
but you can't,
382
00:17:32,440 --> 00:17:33,920
because you just...you can't.
383
00:17:34,039 --> 00:17:35,799
I always get a little bit nervous
384
00:17:35,920 --> 00:17:38,359
when Pat comes in
for one of his little chats.
385
00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:42,160
Sadly, Pat's chosen to learn
from my life's mistakes
386
00:17:42,279 --> 00:17:43,640
instead of learning
from his own.
387
00:17:43,759 --> 00:17:45,960
-So... you still loved her
in the end?
388
00:17:46,079 --> 00:17:47,480
-Or did you...?
389
00:17:47,559 --> 00:17:50,319
Oh, it was a little bit hard to
love someone that hates you.
390
00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:51,319
Yeah.
391
00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:52,319
Don't worry too much.
392
00:17:52,440 --> 00:17:54,000
If you worry too much,
you'll drive yourself mad.
393
00:17:54,079 --> 00:17:55,599
By the time you cut
the wedding cake,
394
00:17:55,720 --> 00:17:57,599
you'll cut the table in half,
you'll be that nervous.
395
00:17:57,720 --> 00:18:01,400
A wedding is an "I do" kind of day.
That's all your pressure is.
396
00:18:01,519 --> 00:18:02,880
Remember that - "I do."
397
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:05,279
Do you want to marry this woman till
the rest of your life?
398
00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:06,279
"I do."
399
00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:07,920
Are you ready
to go to the park?
400
00:18:08,039 --> 00:18:09,920
Do you want to have
photos taken next to her
401
00:18:10,039 --> 00:18:10,960
now that you've married her?
402
00:18:11,079 --> 00:18:11,960
"I do."
403
00:18:12,079 --> 00:18:13,440
Do you want to go
on the honeymoon
404
00:18:13,559 --> 00:18:14,920
and do the horizontal
folk dance?
405
00:18:15,039 --> 00:18:16,240
"Yes, love, I do."
406
00:18:16,319 --> 00:18:18,079
Just, all you've gotta
remember is "I do".
407
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:20,960
There's no pressure,
you know?
408
00:18:21,079 --> 00:18:24,119
If you think of it like that,
then it's not that big a deal...
409
00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:26,160
..unless a bloke comes down
in the wedding dress,
410
00:18:26,279 --> 00:18:27,759
then you'll know
your day's gone to shit.
411
00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:29,680
But that's not gonna
happen, is it?
412
00:18:31,279 --> 00:18:33,720
I don't know whether
I'm necessarily the right person
413
00:18:33,799 --> 00:18:36,440
to be asking about all this,
to tell you the truth, Pat.
414
00:18:36,559 --> 00:18:39,319
Mine failed.
I don't...you know
415
00:18:39,440 --> 00:18:40,960
I once heard a guy say,
416
00:18:41,079 --> 00:18:42,440
"Cut out the middle man -
417
00:18:42,559 --> 00:18:44,480
"find someone you hate
and give them a house."
418
00:18:44,559 --> 00:18:46,319
Now, if you want to
be negative about it,
419
00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:47,799
that's the way you'd look at it.
420
00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:49,680
You've been there.
I haven't been there yet.
421
00:18:49,799 --> 00:18:51,160
You've been through that.
422
00:18:51,279 --> 00:18:54,119
I mean, I'm asking you
because you...
423
00:18:54,240 --> 00:18:56,599
..you were there for 14 years.
424
00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:59,279
But that's...
that was my missus.
425
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:01,000
You're gonna marry
someone different.
426
00:19:01,079 --> 00:19:02,000
And that's...
427
00:19:02,079 --> 00:19:03,480
If you were gonna
marry my ex-wife,
428
00:19:03,559 --> 00:19:05,480
I'd have a ton of stuff
to tell you.
429
00:19:05,559 --> 00:19:09,039
Is this the right person?
Is this the right time?
430
00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:10,640
Is this the right...?
431
00:19:16,079 --> 00:19:17,839
Hello.
WOMAN: Yeah, come in.
432
00:19:17,960 --> 00:19:19,440
Yeah, it's only me.
433
00:19:19,559 --> 00:19:21,759
How are you?
- Yeah, OK.
434
00:19:21,880 --> 00:19:24,200
It's a fair old day outside,
isn't it?
435
00:19:24,319 --> 00:19:26,160
There's the boy.
How are you, boy? You right?
436
00:19:26,279 --> 00:19:27,839
You right to go?
437
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:30,240
All good. You've got some
stuff packed and a towel?
438
00:19:30,319 --> 00:19:31,759
Alright.
439
00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:33,680
Well, we'll get going, eh?
We'll hit the road.
440
00:19:33,799 --> 00:19:35,160
What do you say, mate?
441
00:19:35,279 --> 00:19:37,519
We'll be back,
well, I don't know what time.
442
00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:39,720
We're just gonna head off
down the beach now.
443
00:19:39,799 --> 00:19:41,599
So...
- I need him back by 4:00.
444
00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:43,440
I'm sorry?
- I need him back by 4:00.
445
00:19:43,559 --> 00:19:44,920
What? Well, it's midday now.
446
00:19:45,039 --> 00:19:46,960
How am I gonna have him back
by four o'clock?
447
00:19:47,079 --> 00:19:48,960
I've got plans.
I need him back by 4:00.
448
00:19:49,079 --> 00:19:50,960
Look, you want to
jump in the car, mate?
449
00:19:51,079 --> 00:19:52,799
Grab your toy there.
Jump in the car.
450
00:19:52,920 --> 00:19:53,799
I'll be one sec.
451
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:55,799
I'm just gonna have
a little chat to your mother.
452
00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:57,680
It would've been nice
to have known this
453
00:19:57,799 --> 00:19:59,400
at 8:00 this morning
when I rang.
454
00:19:59,519 --> 00:20:01,039
We're going down
to Ocean Grove.
455
00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:03,279
It'll take me an hour and a half
to get there.
456
00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:05,519
I don't give a shit.
I need him back at 4:00.
457
00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:07,559
We're just taking him down
to see his grandfather.
458
00:20:07,680 --> 00:20:09,079
If I've got him back by 4:00,
459
00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:10,400
we'll only spend
30 minutes there.
460
00:20:10,519 --> 00:20:12,039
It would've been nice
to have known this
461
00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:13,039
this morning, though.
462
00:20:13,160 --> 00:20:15,519
I'm taking the boy
down to see his grandfather,
463
00:20:15,640 --> 00:20:18,279
not that you seem to be
too plussed about that.
464
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:19,759
Alright.
465
00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:21,440
Jesus Christ.
466
00:20:23,799 --> 00:20:25,559
Hey, do you want to
jump in the front
467
00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:26,960
with your old man, mate?
468
00:20:27,079 --> 00:20:28,799
You don't want to
jump up the front there?
469
00:20:28,920 --> 00:20:31,319
We've got the front seat.
You can sit up with me and...
470
00:20:31,440 --> 00:20:32,799
Alright. Well, please yourself.
471
00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:34,599
You're right
in the back there, then?
472
00:20:37,079 --> 00:20:38,880
Alright.
473
00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:44,960
How you been, mate?
You been good?
474
00:20:45,079 --> 00:20:48,319
Hey? Well, er, we'll get you
down to your grandad's.
475
00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:51,119
We're just gonna go down to
Ocean Grove, to the beach.
476
00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:53,359
You like it down at the beach,
don't you, mate?
477
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:54,839
What do you say, eh?
478
00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:57,240
Dad, are you going to hell?
479
00:20:57,319 --> 00:20:59,680
Am I going to hell?
480
00:20:59,799 --> 00:21:02,839
Well, no, I'm not going to hell.
Not as far as I know.
481
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:04,319
Why's that?
482
00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:07,359
Because Mum said... Mum said you
don't believe in God.
483
00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:09,759
Mum said
I don't believe in God?
484
00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:12,480
And that's why
I'm going to hell?
485
00:21:12,559 --> 00:21:15,559
Well, mate, er...
Look, I tell you what.
486
00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:17,960
When God introduces
himself to me,
487
00:21:18,079 --> 00:21:20,359
I'll give him my full attention.
488
00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:23,319
I'll give him 150%, mate.
489
00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:26,440
But until then,
I'm just a little bit busy.
490
00:21:26,559 --> 00:21:28,799
Jesus, and I'm going to hell,
she reckons.
491
00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:30,960
(Sighs)
492
00:21:31,079 --> 00:21:33,640
To be quite honest,
I think I'm already in it.
493
00:21:33,759 --> 00:21:35,240
(Mutters) Am I going to hell!
494
00:21:35,319 --> 00:21:37,920
(Giggles)
(Sings) # Australians all
495
00:21:38,039 --> 00:21:40,319
# Let us ring Joyce
496
00:21:40,440 --> 00:21:44,240
(Both sing) # For she
is young and free
497
00:21:44,319 --> 00:21:45,720
# She's free... #
498
00:21:45,799 --> 00:21:47,200
(Boy giggles)
499
00:21:47,319 --> 00:21:49,640
You know, if my son
ended up doing this job,
500
00:21:49,759 --> 00:21:52,160
I don't think
I'd be that upset by that.
501
00:21:52,279 --> 00:21:53,640
If he was happy,
502
00:21:53,759 --> 00:21:55,240
and he had good people around him
503
00:21:55,359 --> 00:21:56,839
Iike I've got good people around me,
504
00:21:56,960 --> 00:21:58,319
and he's making OK money
505
00:21:58,440 --> 00:22:00,640
and he's proud of
what he does as a trade -
506
00:22:00,759 --> 00:22:02,359
'cause, don't forget,
it is a trade...
507
00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:03,359
Hello?
508
00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:04,920
..I'd be stoked for him.
509
00:22:05,039 --> 00:22:06,759
You there, Dad?
Hey, mate, how are you going?
510
00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:08,359
Oh, you made it, I see.
511
00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:10,400
I did. Good to see you again.
512
00:22:10,519 --> 00:22:12,319
Say hello to
your grandfather, son.
513
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:14,240
You better... Wait on, boy.
Take your shoes off.
514
00:22:14,359 --> 00:22:15,799
You might have to
pop them off.
515
00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:18,759
You'd better get yours off too.
- Alright. We'll pop them off.
516
00:22:21,759 --> 00:22:22,640
Right.
517
00:22:22,759 --> 00:22:24,680
Have you been well?
Oh, yeah. Listen...
518
00:22:24,799 --> 00:22:26,599
Eh, eh, just before...
No, wait on.
519
00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:28,279
I've just had that scotchguarded there.
520
00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:30,720
You'd better get these off.
You'd better get these off.
521
00:22:30,839 --> 00:22:32,799
Well, they're clean.
I mean, I haven't been...
522
00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:34,920
I've only dropped
into the office this morning.
523
00:22:35,039 --> 00:22:36,400
There's no business on them.
524
00:22:36,519 --> 00:22:37,880
I'm actually going to
a job tonight.
525
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:39,759
Well, they don't look
too flash to me.
526
00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:41,359
Get them off. I'll get you...
527
00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:43,200
I've got something
you can wear. Here, I've got...
528
00:22:43,319 --> 00:22:44,720
Get them off, would you?
529
00:22:44,839 --> 00:22:46,759
Well, I can't run around
in me jocks, Dad.
530
00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:47,759
No, well, I've got something.
531
00:22:47,880 --> 00:22:49,599
I've got a gown here
you can put on.
532
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:51,079
No-one's gonna see you.
533
00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:53,519
For Christ's sake.
Just take them off.
534
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:55,200
Jesus Christ.
535
00:22:56,279 --> 00:22:57,720
Well, what am I gonna wear?
536
00:22:57,839 --> 00:23:00,640
I've got a gown here.
I've got a gown, I said.
537
00:23:01,880 --> 00:23:04,039
So what else is news, Dad?
What have you been doing?
538
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:07,119
Oh, not a lot. There's not
a lot to do down here.
539
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:11,000
It goes past with
monotonous regularity.
540
00:23:11,119 --> 00:23:13,960
Just don't take your foot off the thing.
Just let me move that up.
541
00:23:14,079 --> 00:23:14,960
Sure.
542
00:23:15,079 --> 00:23:16,759
I'll get a couple of coasters there for...
543
00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:19,119
Won't be a tick.
- Alright.
544
00:23:23,319 --> 00:23:26,400
There you go, young fella.
Don't... Try not to spill that.
545
00:23:26,519 --> 00:23:27,960
Just keep...
keep your eye on him.
546
00:23:28,079 --> 00:23:29,440
He'll be right, Dad.
547
00:23:29,559 --> 00:23:31,319
There you go, son.
There's your water for you.
548
00:23:31,440 --> 00:23:33,720
I'll give you a tea.
I'm a bit light on for coffee.
549
00:23:33,839 --> 00:23:37,440
My pension doesn't come through till
next week.
550
00:23:37,559 --> 00:23:41,799
Did you ring that bloke that
I told you to ring about the job?
551
00:23:41,920 --> 00:23:43,599
No, I didn't...
No, I haven't rung him.
552
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:45,119
Why not?
553
00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:47,559
He's a good mate of mine.
Why didn't you ring him?
554
00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:49,799
I'm not saying he's not
a good mate of yours, Dad.
555
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:52,359
It's just I don't need
to ring him. I've got a job.
556
00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:54,359
Yeah, but I'm talking
about a real job.
557
00:23:54,480 --> 00:23:55,880
I'm talking about a real job.
558
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:57,720
I've got a real job, Dad.
I'm a plumber.
559
00:23:57,839 --> 00:24:00,880
Yeah, plumber, my arse.
I know what you are.
560
00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:04,000
Here, young fella.
561
00:24:04,119 --> 00:24:05,519
You better go outside
and eat that.
562
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:07,880
I don't want you dropping crumbs all
over the floor.
563
00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:09,359
Sit on... outside.
564
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:10,519
Take your hat, mate, so...
565
00:24:10,640 --> 00:24:12,559
You might get
a bit of sun out there.
566
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:14,240
Pop your hat on too, eh?
567
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:18,680
I'm a little...a little
disappointed in you, son.
568
00:24:18,799 --> 00:24:21,400
In me? Disappointed...
disappointed with what?
569
00:24:21,519 --> 00:24:23,160
It's a full-time job, Dad.
570
00:24:23,279 --> 00:24:25,640
I'm working
six to seven days a week
571
00:24:25,759 --> 00:24:27,519
and I'm pulling in over $1,200.
572
00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:29,400
Yeah, what, a full-time job?
573
00:24:29,519 --> 00:24:30,920
I didn't put you through school
574
00:24:31,039 --> 00:24:33,599
for you to become
a fuckin' glorified turd burglar,
575
00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:35,400
and that's all you
fuckin' well are!
576
00:24:35,519 --> 00:24:37,000
I'm a plumber, Dad.
I'm a plumber.
577
00:24:37,119 --> 00:24:38,599
Oh, plumber, my arse!
578
00:24:38,720 --> 00:24:41,279
Don't say this stuff
in front of the boy.
579
00:24:41,359 --> 00:24:44,039
I won't say it in front of him.
That's why I sent him outside.
580
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:45,519
I'm not a ding-a-ling.
581
00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:47,759
You never see a man,
you never come to see me
582
00:24:47,880 --> 00:24:50,000
and when you come here,
all you wanna do is argue.
583
00:24:50,119 --> 00:24:51,839
I don't wanna argue.
I've just got a job.
584
00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:54,279
As soon as you can accept
that I've got a full-time job...
585
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:55,880
I thought you'd be glad
to see me.
586
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:57,440
I am glad to see you, Dad.
587
00:24:57,559 --> 00:25:00,119
I've just driven down here to...
Of course I'm glad to see you.
588
00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:01,720
And the lad's growing up.
589
00:25:01,839 --> 00:25:03,960
The last time I saw him,
he was about this high,
590
00:25:04,079 --> 00:25:06,200
and have a look at him now -
he's nearly fuckin' 6ft.
591
00:25:06,319 --> 00:25:07,720
You don't bring him
near the place.
592
00:25:07,839 --> 00:25:09,519
What, are you ashamed of me
or something?
593
00:25:09,640 --> 00:25:11,119
Of course I'm not
ashamed of you, Dad.
594
00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:13,079
Aw, it gives me the shits,
it does, boy.
595
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:16,079
You've never appreciated
anything I've done for you.
596
00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:18,200
Oh, it's not about
appreciation, Dad.
597
00:25:18,319 --> 00:25:20,240
I'll just wash this cup.
598
00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:24,160
Pop your shoes on, mate.
599
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:26,680
Here, young fella. Here.
600
00:25:26,799 --> 00:25:29,680
Put that in your kick and
be good to your dad, alright?
601
00:25:29,799 --> 00:25:31,160
Here, give us a cuddle.
602
00:25:31,279 --> 00:25:32,960
Thank Grandad for
the 20 cents. Say thank you...
603
00:25:33,079 --> 00:25:34,440
Thank you.
- Alright.
604
00:25:34,559 --> 00:25:36,480
Off you go. I wanna have
a talk to your father.
605
00:25:36,599 --> 00:25:39,160
Keep your eye on the boy and
don't have him running round
606
00:25:39,240 --> 00:25:40,599
like a wild navvy,
for Christ's sake.
607
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:42,839
I never let you get away
with any of those things.
608
00:25:42,960 --> 00:25:44,839
If you don't rule them
with a rod of iron,
609
00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:46,680
they'll make an arsehole of you
out in public
610
00:25:46,799 --> 00:25:48,240
when you take them out.
611
00:25:48,359 --> 00:25:49,720
He's alright.
Yeah, he's alright.
612
00:25:49,839 --> 00:25:51,240
Well, keep him that way.
613
00:25:51,359 --> 00:25:52,960
Alright, well, I'll see you again.
Alright.
614
00:25:53,079 --> 00:25:54,960
Don't make it so long next time,
for Christ's sake.
615
00:25:55,079 --> 00:25:57,240
A man never sees you.
You never come to visit me.
616
00:25:57,359 --> 00:25:59,119
I'll see you soon.
As soon as I've finished...
617
00:25:59,240 --> 00:26:01,599
And if you get a chance,
ring that bloke about that job.
618
00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:03,960
It won't happen, Dad.
Good to see you.
619
00:26:04,079 --> 00:26:05,559
Alright. See you.
620
00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:09,759
(mutters indistinctly)
621
00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:11,279
Righto.
622
00:26:16,599 --> 00:26:18,359
One! Two! Three!
623
00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:19,839
Move!
624
00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:22,079
I mean, this is kind of
my outlet, you know?
625
00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:25,240
On the job sometimes, you know, you
get a few smarties -
626
00:26:25,359 --> 00:26:27,519
you know, a couple of
clever dicks on the job
627
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:29,119
that always wanna have
a go at you.
628
00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:31,000
And, you know,
they're all full of Dutch courage
629
00:26:31,119 --> 00:26:33,440
and got themselves full
of the Batman juice.
630
00:26:33,559 --> 00:26:37,200
So I started doing this
as a little bit of insurance,
631
00:26:37,319 --> 00:26:38,839
a bit of self-insurance.
632
00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:39,839
( BELL RINGS )
633
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:42,240
Out! In! Out!
634
00:26:42,359 --> 00:26:43,759
(speaks unintelligibly)
635
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:45,359
What's that?
A little bit quicker, mate.
636
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:47,359
(speaks unintelligibly)
A little bit quicker!
637
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:49,400
(speaks unintelligibly)
638
00:26:49,519 --> 00:26:52,000
The only hard bit sometimes
is, with the head gear on,
639
00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:56,240
plus I'm actually
slightly deaf in one ear -
640
00:26:56,359 --> 00:26:57,720
my right side...
641
00:26:57,839 --> 00:26:58,960
( BELL RINGS )
642
00:26:59,079 --> 00:27:00,440
Hook - right hand!
What?
643
00:27:00,559 --> 00:27:02,519
Hook - right hand!
Right. Sorry.
644
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:08,799
Takes it out of me, this, but I do
enjoy doing it, the old boxing.
645
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:12,119
Beat the shit out of each other
and get back to work.
646
00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:22,519
I don't make the rules up.
I don't make the plans.
647
00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:24,079
We get all given the same map.
648
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:25,559
You've gotta be
more conscious
649
00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:27,160
of what other guys
are doing, mate.
650
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:31,000
You want three units, so we'll need to
get that truck in there.
651
00:27:31,079 --> 00:27:32,680
WOMAN: The toilet over there
is disgusting.
652
00:27:32,799 --> 00:27:34,599
There's piss all over the walls.
653
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:37,720
It's gross. You really should
try and maintain them.
654
00:27:40,079 --> 00:27:41,799
PAT: You'd think it'd be
a simple thing.
655
00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:44,079
150 bucks a head. $150.
656
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:46,759
I kind of think what I could do
with $150 for 200 people.
657
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:48,279
Which way? Over this way?
658
00:27:50,640 --> 00:27:52,400
Hey, hang on, hang on!
659
00:27:52,519 --> 00:27:54,000
Sorry, love!
WOMAN: If you don't mind!
660
00:27:54,119 --> 00:27:55,519
Sorry. I'm actually here with...
661
00:27:55,640 --> 00:27:57,599
I'm here with
the...toilet company.
662
00:27:57,720 --> 00:27:58,599
Sorry, love.
663
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:00,200
I didn't see anything,
if that makes any difference.
664
00:28:00,319 --> 00:28:01,799
Jesus.
665
00:28:12,920 --> 00:28:15,119
You know, I wouldn't mind...
666
00:28:15,240 --> 00:28:17,799
They could shit on the floor,
I can cope with that.
667
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:20,160
This is what annoys me
the most - this stuff.
668
00:28:20,279 --> 00:28:22,160
Look, 'Davo waz here'.
669
00:28:22,279 --> 00:28:24,559
Can't spell for a starter.
670
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:26,680
'Davo waz here'.
671
00:28:26,799 --> 00:28:28,400
What a claim to fame that is.
672
00:28:28,519 --> 00:28:30,720
Imagine if he went to, er...
673
00:28:31,799 --> 00:28:33,519
Imagine if he got
to the Eiffel Tower.
674
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:35,160
He'd want a golden handshake,
675
00:28:35,279 --> 00:28:37,720
a fuckin' brass band
and a fireworks show.
676
00:28:37,839 --> 00:28:40,920
This is his claim to fame.
He's been to our shitter.
677
00:28:41,039 --> 00:28:42,759
What a fuckin' muppet.
678
00:28:57,400 --> 00:28:59,079
PAT ON TWO-WAY RADIO:
Kenny, are you there?
679
00:28:59,200 --> 00:29:00,720
KENNY ON TWO-WAY RADIO:
Yeah, go ahead, Pat.
680
00:29:00,839 --> 00:29:03,160
Listen, mate.
I need you down at the block.
681
00:29:03,279 --> 00:29:05,400
A bit of a situation here.
We've got... (Voice breaks up)
682
00:29:05,519 --> 00:29:07,640
I can't hear you. You're breaking up.
683
00:29:07,759 --> 00:29:10,319
I need you here
to have a look and...
684
00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:13,359
I'll be there in a minute.
Just hang on a second.
685
00:29:16,519 --> 00:29:17,880
Jeez.
686
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:19,359
Just found him here.
687
00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:21,279
See if you can...
688
00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:24,079
..undo that chain.
689
00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:26,200
What the bloody hell's...?
690
00:29:26,319 --> 00:29:27,720
You right, mate?
691
00:29:30,960 --> 00:29:33,359
Can you...? Hey, mate?
You alright?
692
00:29:34,440 --> 00:29:37,240
How are you going? Wake up, tiger.
693
00:29:37,359 --> 00:29:39,359
Hang on, hang on.
694
00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:41,799
(Man yells) Simon!
695
00:29:41,920 --> 00:29:44,279
Don't touch me!
Don't touch me!
696
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:46,960
KENNY: Jesus. Well, he was passed out
when we got here.
697
00:29:47,039 --> 00:29:49,839
He wasn't even awake so we
had to kind of wake him up.
698
00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:51,720
And as soon as
we woke him up,
699
00:29:51,839 --> 00:29:53,279
and he realised
that he was chained
700
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:54,759
and handcuffed to the toilet,
701
00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:56,319
he just went berserk.
702
00:29:56,440 --> 00:29:57,319
(Yells) Peter!
703
00:29:57,440 --> 00:29:59,160
I don't know. Maybe he's on drugs or
something.
704
00:29:59,279 --> 00:30:00,920
He was jumping round
like a fish.
705
00:30:01,039 --> 00:30:01,920
MAN: You bastards!
706
00:30:02,039 --> 00:30:05,079
No, no, it's... He's on
a bucks night or something.
707
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:06,759
He's probably got
some mates here somewhere.
708
00:30:06,880 --> 00:30:08,240
They've drawn on him
with texta.
709
00:30:08,359 --> 00:30:10,559
FIREMAN: What's your name?
I'm Kenny...Smyth.
710
00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:12,279
S-M-Y-T-H.
711
00:30:12,400 --> 00:30:14,440
(Man yells indistinctly)
712
00:30:14,559 --> 00:30:17,839
Listen, I've got my own car here,
alright? I drove here.
713
00:30:17,960 --> 00:30:19,319
I drove here by myself.
714
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:20,799
Arggh! Where the fuck...?
715
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:22,599
Simon!
716
00:30:22,720 --> 00:30:25,599
Sandra's gonna kill me.
717
00:30:25,720 --> 00:30:27,799
Sandra's gonna kill me!
718
00:30:27,920 --> 00:30:29,279
Funny, isn't it?
719
00:30:29,400 --> 00:30:31,279
Of all the people
I could have had with me
720
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:32,279
while I was witnessing
721
00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:33,480
this guy's bucks night
gone wrong...
722
00:30:33,599 --> 00:30:35,720
MAN: I own my own
fuckin' house!
723
00:30:35,839 --> 00:30:37,279
..I had to have Pat.
724
00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:40,240
I wanna go home.
I wanna go home!
725
00:30:40,359 --> 00:30:43,039
I will hear about this
for the next fortnight.
726
00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:49,359
Have a good night, fellas.
Thanks, fellas.
727
00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:51,440
This is just what you guys needed
tonight, wasn't it?
728
00:30:51,559 --> 00:30:52,960
FIREMAN: Exactly! (Laughs)
729
00:30:53,079 --> 00:30:54,440
You didn't see anything at all?
730
00:30:54,559 --> 00:30:55,720
PAT: No, I walked in
and saw him.
731
00:30:59,519 --> 00:31:01,079
Ugh!
732
00:31:01,200 --> 00:31:03,119
Jeez. Oh!
733
00:31:03,240 --> 00:31:06,079
What's the weather like
down there, Kenny?
734
00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:08,000
Oh, yeah, it's great, Sammy.
It's great.
735
00:31:11,720 --> 00:31:13,759
What's this Pat's bloody story?
- Eh?
736
00:31:13,880 --> 00:31:15,559
Oh, he's giving me
the shits lately.
737
00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:17,119
What are you...? Huh?
- Pat.
738
00:31:17,240 --> 00:31:19,200
It doesn't actually take
a genius at times
739
00:31:19,319 --> 00:31:20,799
to figure out
who are the square pegs
740
00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:22,279
in a room full of round holes.
741
00:31:22,400 --> 00:31:24,640
We've got a new guy, Sammy,
who started with us.
742
00:31:24,759 --> 00:31:25,799
Nice bloke.
743
00:31:25,920 --> 00:31:27,799
He's a hard worker,
there's no doubt about that,
744
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:29,319
but he's hard work.
745
00:31:29,440 --> 00:31:30,920
Always going on
about this bloody marriage
746
00:31:31,039 --> 00:31:32,400
and, "Is this gonna go right?"
747
00:31:32,519 --> 00:31:33,920
or "Is that gonna go
bloody right?"
748
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:36,440
Is he gonna marry her or not?
749
00:31:36,559 --> 00:31:38,359
I'd say so.
They've got a wedding.
750
00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:40,200
He's either gonna marry her
or not marry her.
751
00:31:40,319 --> 00:31:42,200
If he ain't gonna marry her,
I'll give her one.
752
00:31:42,319 --> 00:31:43,799
Look, mate.
753
00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:50,079
I understand
what you're saying, I really do,
754
00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:51,640
and I am hearing you,
755
00:31:51,759 --> 00:31:53,799
but, mate, what you've
gotta understand
756
00:31:53,920 --> 00:31:55,559
is there is a smell in here
757
00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:58,440
that is gonna outlast
religion, alright?
758
00:31:58,559 --> 00:32:01,319
So can you just give me ears
a rest for a minute?
759
00:32:01,440 --> 00:32:03,599
Just give it a break for a sec
760
00:32:03,720 --> 00:32:06,480
and we'll talk about it
later, alright?
761
00:32:06,599 --> 00:32:08,720
I'd appreciate it, mate.
762
00:32:08,839 --> 00:32:10,279
Now you know how I feel.
763
00:32:10,400 --> 00:32:11,759
Yeah, I do.
764
00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:13,400
Just like Pat - full of shit.
765
00:32:20,440 --> 00:32:22,680
Keep going that way,
over towards the ambulance.
766
00:32:22,799 --> 00:32:24,319
Face it, she's had
too many drinks, mate.
767
00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:27,240
It doesn't matter whether
she's drunk or on drugs,
768
00:32:27,359 --> 00:32:28,720
just get her through, will you?
769
00:32:28,839 --> 00:32:31,640
Just push the crowd, will you?
Just push, will you?
770
00:32:31,759 --> 00:32:33,880
Get in front and push
the crowd out of the way.
771
00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:35,599
I'm trying to get through
but I can't.
772
00:32:35,720 --> 00:32:37,680
I often get nervous
on days like these
773
00:32:37,799 --> 00:32:39,519
at these big beach festivals, you know.
774
00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:41,160
They draw a very big crowd
775
00:32:41,279 --> 00:32:43,160
and we quite often
have to bring in extra crew.
776
00:32:43,279 --> 00:32:46,160
You know, with half the kids
on the wacky tobaccy
777
00:32:46,279 --> 00:32:47,880
and the fruity disco biscuits,
778
00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:49,799
you know, they're as mad
as a clown's cock.
779
00:32:58,839 --> 00:33:00,480
Yeah, I am, actually.
780
00:33:00,599 --> 00:33:02,559
I've got a little girl.
She's been into two toilets.
781
00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:05,440
There's no toilet paper at all.
Are you doing your job here?
782
00:33:05,559 --> 00:33:07,839
If you have a toilet, you have
to have paper, understand?
783
00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:09,720
We do, mate. I'm sorry.
I mean, we're filming...
784
00:33:09,839 --> 00:33:12,079
Don't be sorry. Don't do it again. Make
sure there's paper.
785
00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:14,519
We'll get it fixed up for you.
I've gotta go now.
786
00:33:19,599 --> 00:33:22,880
OK, what I'll do... Sam, I want you to
stay with Pat, OK?
787
00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:24,839
You stay with him
for another couple of hours.
788
00:33:24,960 --> 00:33:26,720
Have a look at this here.
789
00:33:26,839 --> 00:33:28,480
This is half my trouble here.
790
00:33:28,599 --> 00:33:30,559
See, he's supposed to be looking after
791
00:33:30,680 --> 00:33:32,759
that toilet I've been getting
all the complaints about.
792
00:33:32,880 --> 00:33:34,400
He's from university
or something.
793
00:33:34,519 --> 00:33:35,880
He's the one that rang us
794
00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:37,920
and said he wanted to make
a few extra bucks,
795
00:33:38,039 --> 00:33:39,400
and look at him.
796
00:33:39,519 --> 00:33:41,039
I've gotta tell you
something, mate.
797
00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:42,680
I appreciate
you want some food,
798
00:33:42,799 --> 00:33:44,160
but we've had nothing
but complaints
799
00:33:44,279 --> 00:33:45,640
from your toilet block
800
00:33:45,759 --> 00:33:47,720
and you're over here eating
and watching the festival.
801
00:33:47,839 --> 00:33:49,319
I just left Dave
over there with it.
802
00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:51,279
I just nipped over here...
803
00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:53,799
..literally just nipped
over here for this.
804
00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:55,680
It's been a big day for all of us.
805
00:33:55,799 --> 00:33:57,559
I've been here since
six o'clock this morning.
806
00:33:57,680 --> 00:33:59,440
I know you guys
come on at midday.
807
00:33:59,559 --> 00:34:00,920
There'll be food available
later on.
808
00:34:01,039 --> 00:34:02,519
Oh, right. No, I didn't know.
809
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:04,400
If you can just head
back to the toilets,
810
00:34:04,519 --> 00:34:06,119
you're gonna need
to give them a clean.
811
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:07,400
You'll figure it out.
812
00:34:07,519 --> 00:34:09,599
All you do is keep toilet paper and keep
it clean.
813
00:34:09,679 --> 00:34:10,920
It's unbelievable, isn't it?
814
00:34:11,039 --> 00:34:12,719
Like I said, he's probably studying to be
815
00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:13,880
an accountant or something.
816
00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:15,559
He can't even clean a shitter.
817
00:34:15,639 --> 00:34:16,559
WOMAN: No.
How much longer?
818
00:34:16,639 --> 00:34:18,400
Look, it looks clean to me.
It looks fine.
819
00:34:18,519 --> 00:34:20,239
If you'd have seen it
five minutes ago, love,
820
00:34:20,360 --> 00:34:21,719
you wouldn't have thought so.
821
00:34:21,840 --> 00:34:24,760
But there you go.
Sorry about that. In you go.
822
00:34:28,519 --> 00:34:29,920
Have a look at this.
823
00:34:33,480 --> 00:34:37,320
Mate, I've had three complaints
about the girls toilets already.
824
00:34:37,440 --> 00:34:39,559
There's just, like, so many people in
there at the moment,
825
00:34:39,639 --> 00:34:41,639
I don't want to, er...
I can't really go in.
826
00:34:41,760 --> 00:34:43,679
There's gonna be a lot of people in
there all night.
827
00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:44,679
It's a festival.
828
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:46,159
Even with the girls in there?
829
00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:48,840
That's your job. You can throw it over
the top of the door.
830
00:34:48,920 --> 00:34:50,480
They need paper more than
they do conversation.
831
00:34:50,599 --> 00:34:51,960
Rightio.
Alright.
832
00:34:52,079 --> 00:34:54,000
Jeez.
833
00:34:54,119 --> 00:34:56,000
PAT: I've just gotta talk to you
about something.
834
00:34:56,119 --> 00:34:58,320
Yeah, what's wrong?
I've been here for 12 months.
835
00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:00,480
He's been here for two weeks!
- Yeah.
836
00:35:00,599 --> 00:35:01,480
And he's honestly,
837
00:35:01,599 --> 00:35:02,960
he's constantly telling me
what to do.
838
00:35:03,079 --> 00:35:04,519
He's really starting
to piss me off.
839
00:35:04,639 --> 00:35:06,360
I mean, is there a hierarchy here or
something?
840
00:35:06,480 --> 00:35:09,760
No, no, there's no hierarchy, Pat. We're
all shitkickers, mate.
841
00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:11,559
There's no pecking order
in poo, mate.
842
00:35:11,639 --> 00:35:13,400
Well, no, but at the same time,
you know,
843
00:35:13,519 --> 00:35:14,639
there's a loyalty there
844
00:35:14,760 --> 00:35:16,119
if you've been here
for two weeks,
845
00:35:16,199 --> 00:35:17,599
or if you've been here
for 12 months.
846
00:35:17,679 --> 00:35:19,119
I mean, he thinks
he's in charge.
847
00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:29,280
MAN: Hey, Kenny?
Yes, mate?
848
00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:31,280
This woman, she's lost
her ring down the toilet.
849
00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:32,880
Which woman? Which one?
850
00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:34,559
She's just that one over there.
851
00:35:34,639 --> 00:35:36,039
What's she done?
852
00:35:36,159 --> 00:35:37,800
She's lost her wedding ring
down the toilet
853
00:35:37,920 --> 00:35:39,400
and she wants us to get it out.
854
00:35:39,519 --> 00:35:40,880
So what do you do?
855
00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:42,400
You'll need to deal with that.
856
00:35:42,519 --> 00:35:44,639
Look, you head over there
and get a start on it
857
00:35:44,760 --> 00:35:46,239
and I'll come over
and help you out.
858
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:47,239
But how do you...
859
00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:48,840
Well, you've just gotta
fish it out.
860
00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:50,440
I'll be over there
in five minutes.
861
00:35:50,559 --> 00:35:52,679
You've gotta get in real quick, mate,
because it'll settle.
862
00:35:52,800 --> 00:35:54,519
You've gotta get into it
pretty straightaway, mate.
863
00:35:54,639 --> 00:35:56,039
You've had a pretty easy day.
864
00:35:56,159 --> 00:35:57,519
You've had a good day so far
865
00:35:57,639 --> 00:35:59,119
and this is something
you have to do.
866
00:35:59,199 --> 00:36:00,599
We do it all the time.
867
00:36:00,679 --> 00:36:02,199
We've promised
we're gonna get her ring
868
00:36:02,320 --> 00:36:03,760
and that's what we have to do.
869
00:36:03,880 --> 00:36:06,440
I reckon I could feel it with
gloves if I had some gloves.
870
00:36:06,519 --> 00:36:08,440
Mate, you're gonna have
to take my word for it.
871
00:36:08,559 --> 00:36:11,199
If you put the gloves on,
you're not gonna feel the ring.
872
00:36:11,320 --> 00:36:13,880
There's nothing... Mate,
it only happened a minute ago.
873
00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:16,280
It's gonna be sitting pretty much on the
top of the pile.
874
00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:17,760
That's why you can't
have gloves
875
00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:19,280
or you'll push it straight into it.
876
00:36:19,400 --> 00:36:21,159
Just bung your hand
down there and grab it,
877
00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:22,719
and as soon as you're done,
878
00:36:22,840 --> 00:36:24,400
we'll wash her ring, obviously,
and your hand
879
00:36:24,519 --> 00:36:25,679
and it'll all be over.
880
00:36:25,800 --> 00:36:28,119
It's 85% water, mate.
There's nothing to worry about.
881
00:36:28,199 --> 00:36:30,519
I thought this would be corporate
bathrooms,
882
00:36:30,639 --> 00:36:31,519
you know.
883
00:36:31,639 --> 00:36:33,159
It says 'corporate bathrooms'.
884
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:34,719
It's only a logo.
885
00:36:34,840 --> 00:36:36,199
I thought it'd be businessmen and stuff.
886
00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:38,239
You reckon all the girls
on Virgin Airlines are virgins?
887
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:39,760
Sorry.
888
00:36:39,880 --> 00:36:41,280
But...
889
00:36:43,840 --> 00:36:46,159
I'll do it myself.
890
00:36:46,280 --> 00:36:47,639
(Locks door)
891
00:36:47,760 --> 00:36:49,639
Good luck with his
bloody degree. Jesus.
892
00:36:51,159 --> 00:36:53,760
How are you going, love? Well,
there you go. We got it back.
893
00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:55,559
That's her there.
That's your ring, isn't it?
894
00:36:55,639 --> 00:36:57,239
That's the one. Thanks.
Fantastic.
895
00:36:57,360 --> 00:36:58,719
Well, there you go.
OK.
896
00:36:58,840 --> 00:37:00,199
Hang on.
You right?
897
00:37:00,320 --> 00:37:01,679
It's a bit embarrassing.
898
00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:03,920
No, it happens all the time.
It's not the first time.
899
00:37:04,039 --> 00:37:05,519
I'll pop it in there for you.
900
00:37:05,639 --> 00:37:07,000
Thanks for that.
- No worries.
901
00:37:07,119 --> 00:37:08,599
I'll see you later, then.
902
00:37:13,199 --> 00:37:15,000
Great, this is.
903
00:37:15,119 --> 00:37:16,960
I've bloody... I've been
held up here
904
00:37:17,079 --> 00:37:18,440
and now I've just found out
905
00:37:18,559 --> 00:37:20,960
I've gotta drive the truck
back to the depot,
906
00:37:21,079 --> 00:37:24,280
and I'm supposed to be at
my brother's birthday tonight.
907
00:37:26,880 --> 00:37:28,840
I will say one thing,
908
00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:31,880
and that is today's
just about got me beat.
909
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:35,679
I'm not exactly gonna be
the life of the party tonight.
910
00:37:35,800 --> 00:37:37,360
Today was...
911
00:37:37,480 --> 00:37:39,679
Today was a pretty long day.
912
00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:42,159
Like I said, I can't let you in.
913
00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:43,159
With what you're wearing,
914
00:37:43,280 --> 00:37:44,760
I can't let you in there
tonight, alright?
915
00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:46,880
I understand.
Well, can you go in?
916
00:37:47,000 --> 00:37:50,679
No, I can't. I need to stay here
and look after this door.
917
00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:52,199
I can't let you in.
918
00:37:52,320 --> 00:37:54,400
He's just in here.
919
00:37:55,480 --> 00:37:57,079
Sorry, can you get David?
920
00:37:57,159 --> 00:37:59,320
Yeah, can you grab him for us?
921
00:37:59,440 --> 00:38:01,079
One minute, mate, alright?
Just one minute.
922
00:38:01,159 --> 00:38:03,559
I'll come back out once
I've found him. Thanks, mate.
923
00:38:05,400 --> 00:38:06,880
Go home, get changed
and come back.
924
00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:09,000
I'm not introducing you
to people in fuckin' overalls.
925
00:38:09,119 --> 00:38:10,880
Jesus Christ.
I wouldn't do that to you.
926
00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:13,679
Did I fuckin' turn up to your 21st in a
fuckin' pair of shorts?
927
00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:15,840
Well, look, it wouldn't
worry me, would it?
928
00:38:15,960 --> 00:38:18,039
Look, I'd go home
and get changed,
929
00:38:18,159 --> 00:38:19,880
but it's gonna take me
2 to 2.5 hours.
930
00:38:20,000 --> 00:38:23,440
I've gotta go to Werribee and
dump a load in the truck, so...
931
00:38:23,559 --> 00:38:24,960
Alright, then.
932
00:38:25,079 --> 00:38:27,079
How about I give you a ring
during the week?
933
00:38:27,159 --> 00:38:30,119
I'd prefer if you came back, but
if you've gotta do that, do that.
934
00:38:30,199 --> 00:38:32,360
Well, I won't have time.
I'll ring you during the week.
935
00:38:32,480 --> 00:38:33,960
Happy birthday anyway.
Thank you.
936
00:38:34,079 --> 00:38:35,519
Alright. Have a good one.
937
00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:41,440
Thanks, mate. Thank you.
938
00:38:58,480 --> 00:39:01,199
I have very fond memories
of my childhood.
939
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:04,400
You know, David and I
were brought up on a farm
940
00:39:04,480 --> 00:39:06,119
in sort of northern Victoria.
941
00:39:06,199 --> 00:39:10,599
Mum and Dad were...they were
farmers. They had an orchard.
942
00:39:10,679 --> 00:39:13,000
And that's where I spent
my entire youth, you know.
943
00:39:13,079 --> 00:39:15,000
I'd only ever been to the city...
944
00:39:15,079 --> 00:39:18,360
We used to come down
to the city on the fruit runs
945
00:39:18,440 --> 00:39:21,400
when it was time to deliver
all the fruit to the market.
946
00:39:21,480 --> 00:39:24,119
I try and get down here
pretty much every year
947
00:39:24,199 --> 00:39:25,880
for Mum's birthday.
948
00:39:27,039 --> 00:39:30,840
Mum brought me these gloves.
They're beauties.
949
00:39:30,920 --> 00:39:34,159
Little sleeve there with a button
as if they're off a suit.
950
00:39:34,280 --> 00:39:36,400
Good sense of humour,
my mother.
951
00:39:38,480 --> 00:39:40,559
I don't know if David
comes down here much
952
00:39:40,639 --> 00:39:42,880
and I know Dad still finds it
pretty hard,
953
00:39:42,960 --> 00:39:45,000
but I actually like coming up
954
00:39:45,079 --> 00:39:47,280
and, you know,
I don the gloves
955
00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:48,760
and I give
her marble cubbyhouse
956
00:39:48,840 --> 00:39:50,360
a bit of a once over, you know.
957
00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:52,360
Give it a bit of a spruce up.
958
00:39:52,440 --> 00:39:54,440
Good... good fun lady,
my mum,
959
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:56,480
and well-liked in the town,
you know.
960
00:39:56,559 --> 00:39:58,039
'Big cake lady', they'd call her.
961
00:39:58,119 --> 00:40:00,039
She wasn't a good cook,
but she made big cakes,
962
00:40:00,119 --> 00:40:02,280
and that was pretty popular
with all me mates.
963
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:05,119
Very affectionate woman,
my mum.
964
00:40:05,199 --> 00:40:06,599
When you were being
hugged by her,
965
00:40:06,679 --> 00:40:08,079
you knew you were being held
966
00:40:08,159 --> 00:40:09,559
because Mum's shape...
from behind,
967
00:40:09,639 --> 00:40:11,840
she looked like a fridge
with a head, but, you know,
968
00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:13,920
you knew you were being cared for,
you know,
969
00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:17,639
'cause Dad's emotional bank
account had two cents in it.
970
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:19,280
So Mum let you know
you were loved
971
00:40:19,360 --> 00:40:22,039
and Dad kept the work going
to keep the money coming in.
972
00:40:22,119 --> 00:40:25,039
And that's the way it was
in those days, you know.
973
00:40:31,760 --> 00:40:34,360
MAN OVER P.A. : Drivers
in the drag-racing category,
974
00:40:34,440 --> 00:40:36,199
could you move to lane six?
975
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:43,519
It's a pretty strange place,
I suppose,
976
00:40:43,599 --> 00:40:46,440
to have a church at a racetrack.
977
00:40:46,480 --> 00:40:48,880
They've actually got it here
for the drivers,
978
00:40:48,960 --> 00:40:50,519
somewhere that they can
say a prayer
979
00:40:50,599 --> 00:40:52,599
before they go out
to a dangerous race,
980
00:40:52,679 --> 00:40:54,480
which I think is good.
981
00:40:57,599 --> 00:40:59,400
I hope no-one ever gets
offended by the fact
982
00:40:59,480 --> 00:41:01,199
that I come here
and have something to eat,
983
00:41:01,320 --> 00:41:02,920
but I don't think anyone does.
984
00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:04,760
I mean, I'm just having
a sandwich, you know.
985
00:41:04,840 --> 00:41:06,360
I mean, after all, it is bread -
986
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:08,559
I'm having my daily bread,
you know.
987
00:41:08,639 --> 00:41:11,280
And I don't think
you need to be religious
988
00:41:11,360 --> 00:41:13,000
to feel the effects of a church,
989
00:41:13,039 --> 00:41:15,519
and that's why I choose
to come and sit here.
990
00:41:15,599 --> 00:41:18,360
You know,
it's a very calming place.
991
00:41:18,440 --> 00:41:20,320
( CAR ENGINES REV LOUDLY )
992
00:41:36,760 --> 00:41:40,159
You know, I think the racing event they
put on here
993
00:41:40,280 --> 00:41:41,159
is sensational.
994
00:41:41,280 --> 00:41:42,920
I mean, there is something here
for everybody.
995
00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:44,559
But wouldn't you know it,
996
00:41:44,639 --> 00:41:47,599
you still get the same old pack of
pinheads
997
00:41:47,679 --> 00:41:49,480
that wanna ruin it
for everyone else.
998
00:41:52,679 --> 00:41:55,519
They camp at the southern end
of the racetrack
999
00:41:55,599 --> 00:41:59,480
and they get up to
all sorts of mischief.
1000
00:41:59,519 --> 00:42:02,000
The thing that really gets
my goat about these monkeys
1001
00:42:02,039 --> 00:42:04,760
is that we have to, by law,
1002
00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:06,480
supply them
with these toilets, right?
1003
00:42:06,559 --> 00:42:10,440
And every year, without fail,
after the end of the last race,
1004
00:42:10,480 --> 00:42:12,199
they set fire to the bastards.
1005
00:42:12,320 --> 00:42:14,599
What we'll do is
if we can get up there
1006
00:42:14,679 --> 00:42:17,039
15 minutes before
the last race starts, right,
1007
00:42:17,119 --> 00:42:18,519
before the Pitman Challenge,
1008
00:42:18,599 --> 00:42:21,480
and the only way we can get
there, right, is via the racetrack.
1009
00:42:21,519 --> 00:42:23,519
If we drive around
the other side of the track,
1010
00:42:23,599 --> 00:42:26,079
jump over the barrier
and we stand with them,
1011
00:42:26,159 --> 00:42:28,400
that'll be enough to deter them
from setting fire to them.
1012
00:42:28,480 --> 00:42:29,880
Can't the cops do that?
1013
00:42:29,960 --> 00:42:32,079
Well, no, they can't. Our job's
to save the toilets, alright?
1014
00:42:32,159 --> 00:42:33,920
Shut up, Pat, they're not worried about
fuckin' toilets.
1015
00:42:34,000 --> 00:42:35,400
What's wrong with you,
you plonker?
1016
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:37,599
We haven't... Guys,
just focus for a minute, alright?
1017
00:42:37,679 --> 00:42:39,760
There's only
a few more cars to drag,
1018
00:42:39,840 --> 00:42:41,280
so we should
get going now, right?
1019
00:43:05,280 --> 00:43:08,760
You know, if I can just save one
toilet, I'll be happy, I reckon.
1020
00:43:08,840 --> 00:43:10,320
You have got to be joking!
1021
00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:11,800
It's the equaliser, isn't it?
1022
00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:14,440
Oh, Jesus Christ, fellas,
can we just work together?
1023
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:16,000
Can we just work together
on this one?
1024
00:43:16,079 --> 00:43:18,400
Put the bloody
thumper bar away, mate!
1025
00:43:20,599 --> 00:43:22,800
Shit!
Jesus Christ.
1026
00:43:22,880 --> 00:43:24,400
The fuckin' race has started.
1027
00:43:24,480 --> 00:43:25,880
Look, just pull over.
Hey, shut up.
1028
00:43:25,960 --> 00:43:28,280
Hang on, boys!
1029
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:31,840
Just hang on!
Shut it!
1030
00:43:31,920 --> 00:43:33,320
For fuck's sake!
1031
00:43:33,400 --> 00:43:34,440
Just keep...
1032
00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:36,840
( TRUCK HORNS BLARE )
1033
00:43:36,920 --> 00:43:38,840
We're here driving
in the middle of a truck race...
1034
00:43:38,920 --> 00:43:40,880
Don't worry about anything!
(Yells indistinctly)
1035
00:43:40,960 --> 00:43:42,599
Just hang on!
Let me concentrate!
1036
00:43:42,679 --> 00:43:44,360
Now, shut up, for Christ's sake.
1037
00:43:44,440 --> 00:43:46,000
Are the boys
on the back alright?
1038
00:43:46,039 --> 00:43:48,400
Pat, just look at the boys
in the back. Are they alright?
1039
00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:49,880
I don't believe it, Pat.
1040
00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:51,360
You're fuckin' like
a nancy fuckin' ninny!
1041
00:43:51,440 --> 00:43:53,400
Guys, can we just calm down?!
- He is out of control.
1042
00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:55,000
What do you mean
'out of control'?!
1043
00:43:55,039 --> 00:43:57,159
You are fuckin' out of control.
- I'm not out of fuckin' control!
1044
00:43:57,280 --> 00:43:59,000
Please, do me a favour...
1045
00:43:59,079 --> 00:44:00,639
Oh, Jesus Christ,
1046
00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:02,920
they've already lit
one of the toilets, the bastards!
1047
00:44:05,920 --> 00:44:07,800
Alright, guys,
there's a break, come on!
1048
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:09,880
Come on. Go, go, go!
1049
00:44:09,960 --> 00:44:12,039
Go to the wall!
1050
00:44:12,119 --> 00:44:13,639
Oh, look at these mongrels.
1051
00:44:14,800 --> 00:44:17,159
What are you doing, Pat?
What are you doing?!
1052
00:44:17,280 --> 00:44:19,840
Sammy, wait for...
Sammy?! Sammy?!
1053
00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:23,199
(Crowd roars)
1054
00:44:41,679 --> 00:44:42,440
Get it up.
1055
00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:49,000
Oi! You spilled my beer,
you bastards!
1056
00:44:52,440 --> 00:44:54,559
Let go of him.
1057
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:04,280
Oh, Jesus!
1058
00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:06,960
Put it out, Thommo. Put it out.
No, mate, me!
1059
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:09,320
Leg, leg, leg! Oh, jeez.
1060
00:45:09,400 --> 00:45:11,920
Get it, Thommo.
Put it out. Get it!
1061
00:45:12,000 --> 00:45:13,400
Right, that's enough!
1062
00:45:13,480 --> 00:45:15,320
You've all had
enough fun now, alright?
1063
00:45:15,400 --> 00:45:17,039
(Crowd cheers)
Come on, you've had your fun!
1064
00:45:17,119 --> 00:45:19,519
Get going, you hoons!
1065
00:45:23,400 --> 00:45:25,840
Let's lock 'em all up, boys.
They're unlocked.
1066
00:45:25,920 --> 00:45:27,519
Let's lock 'em up. Alright.
1067
00:45:27,599 --> 00:45:30,000
You right?
Yeah, I'm alright.
1068
00:45:30,039 --> 00:45:31,480
Everyone alright?
1069
00:45:45,320 --> 00:45:47,480
Pretty crazy old night
that one, wasn't it?
1070
00:45:47,519 --> 00:45:48,960
I mean, that's really put me
1071
00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:51,519
to the end of my test tonight,
I tell you what.
1072
00:45:51,599 --> 00:45:54,000
That's...that's almost
my limit, I reckon.
1073
00:45:54,039 --> 00:45:56,199
I mean, no man
should be set on fire
1074
00:45:56,320 --> 00:45:59,000
trying to save one of
his shitters, you know.
1075
00:46:00,519 --> 00:46:03,280
It's... ridiculous.
1076
00:46:03,360 --> 00:46:06,840
(Men sing drunkenly)
1077
00:46:11,920 --> 00:46:14,360
The problem is
it's Glenn's decision,
1078
00:46:14,440 --> 00:46:15,960
I won't be able to
have you here
1079
00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:17,519
and I'm sorry
it's worked out that way.
1080
00:46:17,599 --> 00:46:20,360
All I did was trot up there to try
and save the fuckin' toilets.
1081
00:46:20,440 --> 00:46:22,880
But you punched the guy out.
He got in the way.
1082
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:24,360
Sammy, every event we do,
1083
00:46:24,440 --> 00:46:26,280
there's people in between us and the
toilets.
1084
00:46:26,360 --> 00:46:27,760
If you run around
punching people out
1085
00:46:27,840 --> 00:46:29,360
every time you've gotta
get to a toilet,
1086
00:46:29,440 --> 00:46:31,159
we'll have to be sponsored
by Don King, mate.
1087
00:46:31,280 --> 00:46:33,039
We're plumbers,
you know what I'm saying?
1088
00:46:33,119 --> 00:46:34,119
Well, where was Pat?
1089
00:46:34,199 --> 00:46:35,920
Pat was doing
a backward flip, wasn't he?
1090
00:46:36,000 --> 00:46:37,679
Mate, I know he was
going backwards.
1091
00:46:37,800 --> 00:46:40,519
He's not cut of the same mustard of
you and me, mate.
1092
00:46:40,599 --> 00:46:44,679
And the point is, he's paid
as a plumber, not a title fighter.
1093
00:46:44,800 --> 00:46:46,360
He's a toilet cleaner, mate.
1094
00:46:46,440 --> 00:46:48,400
Mate, the decision's
been made.
1095
00:46:48,480 --> 00:46:52,280
And the reality is that
I've just gotta let you go.
1096
00:46:52,360 --> 00:46:56,000
I need this job big-time,
I'm telling you. I need it.
1097
00:46:56,039 --> 00:46:58,000
I'm gonna be evicted
from me house.
1098
00:46:58,039 --> 00:46:59,840
If I lose this job,
I'm gonna have nowhere.
1099
00:46:59,920 --> 00:47:02,039
No, you can't sack me.
1100
00:47:02,119 --> 00:47:04,920
You tell him I'll be here seven
o'clock Monday morning.
1101
00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:07,599
Sammy, I can't do that, mate.
You know that.
1102
00:47:07,679 --> 00:47:09,559
The only thing I can do for you
1103
00:47:09,639 --> 00:47:11,440
just to get you
out of a tight spot
1104
00:47:11,480 --> 00:47:13,039
is I can lend you
some money here.
1105
00:47:13,119 --> 00:47:15,039
Throw that
in your skyrocket there.
1106
00:47:15,119 --> 00:47:17,119
Thanks, Kenny. I appreciate it.
That's alright, mate.
1107
00:47:17,199 --> 00:47:19,159
Just sit there and
have a rest for a minute.
1108
00:47:19,280 --> 00:47:20,880
And just let me
grab you a coffee
1109
00:47:20,960 --> 00:47:23,920
and just sit there for a minute
and have a rest, eh?
1110
00:47:32,920 --> 00:47:34,360
( BELL RINGS )
1111
00:47:37,599 --> 00:47:39,119
Go, Kenny, go!
1112
00:47:41,039 --> 00:47:43,000
Dig deep! Go on! Dig deep!
1113
00:47:44,280 --> 00:47:46,119
Kenny, what are you doing?!
1114
00:47:46,199 --> 00:47:48,960
Come on, Ken, work! Work it!
1115
00:47:49,000 --> 00:47:51,039
Work! Hold it up!
1116
00:47:51,119 --> 00:47:53,639
What are you doing, Kenny?!
Come here!
1117
00:47:53,760 --> 00:47:55,119
You can't train like this, mate.
1118
00:47:55,199 --> 00:47:58,039
You either gotta give it
a fair go or get out.
1119
00:47:58,119 --> 00:48:01,320
Now get in there and have a go.
I might call it a night, eh?
1120
00:48:01,400 --> 00:48:03,039
I'm not feeling up to it.
1121
00:48:13,639 --> 00:48:15,639
You've gotta have
someone else to do this.
1122
00:48:15,760 --> 00:48:18,079
I can't do all this
with all the work we've got on.
1123
00:48:18,159 --> 00:48:21,760
With Sammy gone and bloody Pat off
getting married, Glenn,
1124
00:48:21,840 --> 00:48:23,199
I can't do this.
1125
00:48:23,320 --> 00:48:25,039
GLENN: Look, you're going.
I've already booked the tickets.
1126
00:48:25,119 --> 00:48:26,119
What do you mean...
1127
00:48:26,199 --> 00:48:27,599
And you're flying
business class too.
1128
00:48:27,679 --> 00:48:29,360
But you told me
about this show.
1129
00:48:29,440 --> 00:48:31,440
This show's enormous.
Can't you go?
1130
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:33,760
Listen, relax, you're getting
too wound up about it.
1131
00:48:33,840 --> 00:48:35,280
We'll cope down here, alright?
1132
00:48:37,199 --> 00:48:38,679
What's this?
1133
00:48:39,800 --> 00:48:41,159
Believe me, mate,
you'll have a ball.
1134
00:48:41,280 --> 00:48:42,159
It's Nashville, Tennessee.
1135
00:48:42,280 --> 00:48:44,079
You'll get over there,
you work a couple of days,
1136
00:48:44,159 --> 00:48:45,559
the rest you'll just
enjoy yourself.
1137
00:48:45,639 --> 00:48:48,280
Did you know about this?
1138
00:48:48,360 --> 00:48:51,320
( PHONE RINGS )
1139
00:48:51,400 --> 00:48:53,119
I'll be buggered.
1140
00:48:54,159 --> 00:48:56,199
Me own business cards.
1141
00:48:56,320 --> 00:48:57,840
(chuckles)
1142
00:49:00,280 --> 00:49:02,440
WOMAN: Hello, Mr Sacks,
how are you?
1143
00:49:02,480 --> 00:49:03,920
MAN: Fine, thank you.
Very good.
1144
00:49:04,000 --> 00:49:05,760
It's on the far side,
thank you very much.
1145
00:49:05,840 --> 00:49:07,199
How are you going?
Hello.
1146
00:49:07,320 --> 00:49:09,840
Mr Smyth, that's
the far aisle, thank you.
1147
00:49:09,920 --> 00:49:11,840
No worries, alright.
There's a card there.
1148
00:49:11,920 --> 00:49:13,880
That's... I'm Kenny, obviously.
Alright.
1149
00:49:13,960 --> 00:49:15,360
Just if you need me
or anything.
1150
00:49:15,440 --> 00:49:17,159
So, down this way here?
No, the far aisle.
1151
00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:19,159
Alright, no worries,
thanks for that.
1152
00:49:19,280 --> 00:49:21,159
Gee, look at the size of this.
1153
00:49:32,079 --> 00:49:34,760
There's a lot of people here,
isn't there?
1154
00:49:38,679 --> 00:49:41,519
You pop your bags
up the top, do you?
1155
00:49:41,599 --> 00:49:43,639
Your bags go up the top,
is that right?
1156
00:49:43,760 --> 00:49:45,960
This is, uh...
little boy gave me this
1157
00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:48,119
just to bring this along
to remember him.
1158
00:49:48,199 --> 00:49:49,599
'Best Dad', it says.
1159
00:49:49,679 --> 00:49:52,000
It's not a bad award
that one, is it?
1160
00:49:57,199 --> 00:50:00,440
I'm, uh... I'm Kenny,
anyway, mate.
1161
00:50:00,480 --> 00:50:03,079
How are you going?
There's my card there, actually.
1162
00:50:03,159 --> 00:50:04,679
That's my name there.
1163
00:50:04,800 --> 00:50:07,400
This your first time on a plane?
1164
00:50:07,480 --> 00:50:09,760
No, you fly quite a bit.
1165
00:50:11,599 --> 00:50:13,280
Better whack
the old seatbelt on.
1166
00:50:13,360 --> 00:50:14,400
I wonder what the fine
1167
00:50:14,480 --> 00:50:16,199
for not wearing a seatbelt
on a plane is.
1168
00:50:16,320 --> 00:50:19,039
It's 150 bucks in a car,
it'd cost a fortune on a plane.
1169
00:50:19,119 --> 00:50:20,519
INTERCOM:
Ladies and gentlemen,
1170
00:50:20,599 --> 00:50:22,119
from the flight deck,
a very good morning.
1171
00:50:22,199 --> 00:50:24,119
The captain speaking...
1172
00:50:24,199 --> 00:50:27,119
This is fun. This is fun.
1173
00:50:29,519 --> 00:50:32,880
I wish me boy could be here with me.
He'd love this.
1174
00:50:39,920 --> 00:50:42,000
Here we go.
1175
00:50:54,559 --> 00:50:56,119
Where does the...the...?
1176
00:50:57,400 --> 00:50:58,960
I'm not sure how that plugs in.
1177
00:50:59,000 --> 00:51:03,599
It must be...screwed into
the backing plate or something.
1178
00:51:03,679 --> 00:51:05,480
( TOILET FLUSHES )
1179
00:51:05,559 --> 00:51:07,360
Holy shit!
1180
00:51:07,440 --> 00:51:09,000
Hell's bells!
1181
00:51:09,079 --> 00:51:10,599
That is just off its tree.
1182
00:51:10,679 --> 00:51:13,079
They've won me over with that.
1183
00:51:13,159 --> 00:51:14,480
There you go, mate.
1184
00:51:14,559 --> 00:51:15,920
Sorry about that.
No worries.
1185
00:51:16,000 --> 00:51:17,400
Just watch it in there, mate.
1186
00:51:17,480 --> 00:51:19,280
That machine,
once you press that flusher,
1187
00:51:19,360 --> 00:51:22,760
that thing'll probably suck your
guts out through your bum.
1188
00:51:27,960 --> 00:51:29,880
I don't know, I guess
this'd make sense
1189
00:51:29,960 --> 00:51:31,840
if we were going to Hawaii
or something,
1190
00:51:31,920 --> 00:51:34,559
but it's supposed to help
with the circulation.
1191
00:51:34,639 --> 00:51:36,840
But I don't know how long you're
supposed to do it for,
1192
00:51:36,920 --> 00:51:37,840
you know.
1193
00:51:37,920 --> 00:51:40,199
If I do it for five minutes,
is that the world record?
1194
00:51:40,320 --> 00:51:43,000
Or if I do it for two hours,
is that not enough?
1195
00:51:59,039 --> 00:52:02,960
Seems to be a problem
up there with the toilets.
1196
00:52:03,000 --> 00:52:07,480
Well, they certainly seem to be
fussing around with it.
1197
00:52:11,000 --> 00:52:12,880
I think I've broken the toilet
1198
00:52:12,960 --> 00:52:15,840
when I've undone the clips
on the back of it.
1199
00:52:15,920 --> 00:52:18,039
I'm gonna have to sort this out.
1200
00:52:18,119 --> 00:52:19,320
You right here?
1201
00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:21,320
Having trouble here?
Oh, yeah, look, it's fine.
1202
00:52:21,400 --> 00:52:24,480
The ground staff in L.A. will
deal with it when we get there.
1203
00:52:24,519 --> 00:52:25,880
Oh, that's fine. I've, um...
1204
00:52:25,960 --> 00:52:27,360
I actually work
with Splashdown.
1205
00:52:27,440 --> 00:52:29,760
We fix toilets. I can have
a look at it for you.
1206
00:52:29,840 --> 00:52:31,760
Oh, it's fine. Actually,
we can't let you in there.
1207
00:52:31,840 --> 00:52:34,639
Oh, no, no, this is actually what
I do. It's alright, I'll show you.
1208
00:52:34,760 --> 00:52:36,880
Yeah, I work with toilets
all the time.
1209
00:52:36,960 --> 00:52:38,800
This... There's a clip there
1210
00:52:38,880 --> 00:52:41,000
and there's another clip
just in there.
1211
00:52:41,079 --> 00:52:43,039
And once you...
( TOILET FLUSHES )
1212
00:52:43,119 --> 00:52:44,880
Cheers. (Chuckles)
1213
00:52:44,960 --> 00:52:46,679
Well, thanks for doing that.
- Oh, that's alright.
1214
00:52:46,800 --> 00:52:48,159
'Cause we're not
usually allowed to...
1215
00:52:48,280 --> 00:52:50,159
I mean, that would be...
- Oh, it's what I do.
1216
00:52:50,280 --> 00:52:51,480
Kind of what
the business does.
1217
00:52:51,519 --> 00:52:52,480
Splashdown.
- Yeah.
1218
00:52:52,519 --> 00:52:55,400
Corporate bathroom rentals.
It's alright.
1219
00:52:55,480 --> 00:52:57,440
It's nothing too flash
but, you know,
1220
00:52:57,480 --> 00:52:59,559
here it is, got me,
it's got me travelling overseas.
1221
00:52:59,639 --> 00:53:02,199
In fact, this is my first time
I've ever been on an aeroplane.
1222
00:53:02,320 --> 00:53:03,679
(incredulously) No.
Ever.
1223
00:53:03,800 --> 00:53:07,119
I'm the first person
out of our whole family
1224
00:53:07,199 --> 00:53:10,480
to ever have flown
out of Australia.
1225
00:53:10,519 --> 00:53:12,440
And I got a nice little wine here.
1226
00:53:12,480 --> 00:53:14,639
Mind you, like I said, I don't
normally drink white wine.
1227
00:53:14,760 --> 00:53:16,119
That's actually not too...
- Chardonnay.
1228
00:53:16,199 --> 00:53:18,000
What do you usually drink?
- Oh, beer.
1229
00:53:18,039 --> 00:53:19,480
Oh, well, yeah, yeah.
1230
00:53:19,519 --> 00:53:21,960
I drink beer like it's about to
go out of fashion
1231
00:53:22,000 --> 00:53:23,440
and I'm the new trendsetter.
1232
00:53:23,480 --> 00:53:25,079
(Laughs)
So I love it.
1233
00:53:25,159 --> 00:53:27,079
I'd bath in it,
if I had my own way.
1234
00:53:27,159 --> 00:53:28,559
(Laughs)
1235
00:53:28,639 --> 00:53:30,840
Is it alright if I have
a bit more of that?
1236
00:53:30,920 --> 00:53:32,480
Yeah, absolutely.
- I know it's not beer.
1237
00:53:32,559 --> 00:53:34,000
But I'm getting used to it.
1238
00:53:35,320 --> 00:53:37,920
Now, if I start to wobble
when the plane's actually still...
1239
00:53:39,440 --> 00:53:40,599
INTERCOM:
Ladies and gentlemen,
1240
00:53:40,679 --> 00:53:42,079
as we're about to begin
our descent
1241
00:53:42,159 --> 00:53:43,079
into Los Angeles AirPort,
1242
00:53:43,159 --> 00:53:45,119
would you Please make sure
your tray tables are stowed
1243
00:53:45,199 --> 00:53:47,800
and that your safety belts
are fastened.
1244
00:53:57,440 --> 00:53:59,480
I didn't know
it was gonna be this cold.
1245
00:53:59,559 --> 00:54:03,360
This is freezing. Must be about
five degrees or something.
1246
00:54:03,440 --> 00:54:05,559
Oh, thanks. You right?
I can grab that if you want.
1247
00:54:05,639 --> 00:54:08,000
Oh, I'll take it.
- It's got a bit of weight in that.
1248
00:54:08,039 --> 00:54:10,960
Watch that. So, are you
a real cowboy, are you, mate?
1249
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:14,559
I'm afraid not. To tell you
the truth, I'm from New York.
1250
00:54:14,639 --> 00:54:17,679
Oh... I'm Kenny, mate, anyway.
(Laughs) - I'm Bobby.
1251
00:54:20,840 --> 00:54:23,360
You're on the wrong side
of the car here.
1252
00:54:23,440 --> 00:54:25,480
So, where are you headed?
1253
00:54:25,559 --> 00:54:29,000
I'm going to the...
Well, I'm at the poo convention.
1254
00:54:29,039 --> 00:54:31,400
Alright.
You know where that is?
1255
00:54:31,480 --> 00:54:33,760
Yeah. Yeah, I do. I do.
1256
00:54:33,840 --> 00:54:35,800
Actually, it's been pretty busy
with these gentlemen.
1257
00:54:35,880 --> 00:54:38,480
There must be an awful lot
of money in crap, huh?
1258
00:54:38,559 --> 00:54:39,480
Yeah, well...
1259
00:54:39,559 --> 00:54:41,480
Yeah, well, to be quite honest,
there's a shitload of it.
1260
00:54:41,559 --> 00:54:43,000
(Laughs)
1261
00:54:43,039 --> 00:54:44,159
You've probably been doing
1262
00:54:44,280 --> 00:54:45,639
some business for us
this morning.
1263
00:54:45,760 --> 00:54:48,280
I can't get over the size
of this place, Bobby.
1264
00:55:03,039 --> 00:55:05,280
There aren't many cowboys
in Nashville.
1265
00:55:05,360 --> 00:55:07,480
It's about the music industry.
1266
00:55:07,519 --> 00:55:10,840
There's no ranches, there's
no cattle, there's no sheep.
1267
00:55:10,920 --> 00:55:13,000
(Laughs) Yeah, right.
(Laughs) - You know?
1268
00:55:13,079 --> 00:55:14,639
Look at that city.
1269
00:55:17,920 --> 00:55:20,480
MAN ON RADIO: I got
this notice the other day.
1270
00:55:20,519 --> 00:55:22,840
Now, down at the Nashville
Convention Centre,
1271
00:55:22,920 --> 00:55:24,920
today and for
the next couple of days,
1272
00:55:25,000 --> 00:55:27,039
we've got
the world international
1273
00:55:27,119 --> 00:55:29,440
Pumper and Cleaner Show.
1274
00:55:29,480 --> 00:55:30,920
Now, they've actually
been kind enough
1275
00:55:31,000 --> 00:55:33,400
to send us four tickets,
1276
00:55:33,480 --> 00:55:35,280
and we'll be taking
your calls soon
1277
00:55:35,360 --> 00:55:39,079
and I'm going to give away
these tickets to the People...
1278
00:55:39,159 --> 00:55:41,280
Well, mate, Bobby,
I gotta tell you,
1279
00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:42,760
you're a real cowboy
to me, mate.
1280
00:55:42,840 --> 00:55:44,679
Oh, well, thank you, thank you.
- You're the real deal.
1281
00:55:44,800 --> 00:55:46,159
And there's my card too, Bob,
1282
00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:49,480
if ever you need to get a hold
of me for whatever reason.
1283
00:55:49,519 --> 00:55:52,679
Alright, enjoy, you know,
the shit-flinging convention.
1284
00:55:52,800 --> 00:55:54,159
(both laugh)
1285
00:55:54,280 --> 00:55:56,280
Thanks, mate. I will.
- Have a good time.
1286
00:55:56,360 --> 00:55:57,760
Look after yourself, Bob.
Alright.
1287
00:55:57,840 --> 00:55:59,360
See youse, mate.
- Have a good night.
1288
00:56:16,800 --> 00:56:19,519
Oh, Jesus.
1289
00:56:19,599 --> 00:56:21,119
You see the snow?
1290
00:56:21,199 --> 00:56:23,599
That's...quite pretty.
1291
00:56:23,679 --> 00:56:25,159
Good on 'em.
1292
00:56:25,280 --> 00:56:27,000
( ALARM RINGS )
1293
00:56:27,039 --> 00:56:29,000
Yep, yep, yep, yep.
1294
00:56:34,000 --> 00:56:35,760
You know, the most
exciting time for me
1295
00:56:35,840 --> 00:56:37,199
when I was a kid growing up
1296
00:56:37,320 --> 00:56:39,119
was once a year,
Dad would take us
1297
00:56:39,199 --> 00:56:41,480
to the Royal Melbourne Show
in the city
1298
00:56:41,559 --> 00:56:44,559
to see all the tractors
and the animals and whatnot.
1299
00:56:44,639 --> 00:56:47,280
I never thought
I'd feel that way again.
1300
00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:49,519
Who was to know
I would end up
1301
00:56:49,599 --> 00:56:52,400
in the land of bloody flags
and anthems
1302
00:56:52,480 --> 00:56:56,079
at a toilet expo, Poo HQ?
1303
00:56:56,159 --> 00:56:58,800
Jesus Christ.
1304
00:56:59,920 --> 00:57:02,880
(Chuckles)
1305
00:57:04,079 --> 00:57:05,679
Oh, yes.
1306
00:57:05,800 --> 00:57:07,960
Oh, yes.
1307
00:57:33,000 --> 00:57:35,000
Look at that girl there.
1308
00:57:35,079 --> 00:57:37,360
Now, that would be a dream.
1309
00:57:37,440 --> 00:57:39,800
(Reads) "Working today
for a cleaner tomorrow."
1310
00:57:39,880 --> 00:57:41,800
See, they've even got pride
in their slogans.
1311
00:57:41,880 --> 00:57:43,360
And look, they're driving
a Kenworth.
1312
00:57:43,440 --> 00:57:44,840
I mean, forget the kids.
1313
00:57:44,920 --> 00:57:47,000
If I saw this go on the road,
I'd be impressed.
1314
00:57:47,039 --> 00:57:49,119
How you going?
Kenny from Australia.
1315
00:57:49,199 --> 00:57:51,519
Good, Larry.
- You're from Australia?
1316
00:58:10,679 --> 00:58:13,199
You seen the name?
It's Ameri-Can.
1317
00:58:13,320 --> 00:58:14,760
Eh?
1318
00:58:14,840 --> 00:58:16,199
So that's all
hydraulically lifted?
1319
00:58:16,320 --> 00:58:17,199
It's all hydraulic.
1320
00:58:17,320 --> 00:58:19,360
When we get ready
to move the trailer,
1321
00:58:19,440 --> 00:58:21,599
we go in and push
a couple of buttons
1322
00:58:21,679 --> 00:58:23,079
and that lifts right up.
1323
00:58:23,159 --> 00:58:25,480
You could eat
your dinner off that.
1324
00:58:25,559 --> 00:58:26,960
(Chuckles) "Scotty's Potties."
1325
00:58:27,000 --> 00:58:28,440
MAN: There's also
John's Johns.
1326
00:58:28,480 --> 00:58:31,119
There's a company in Australia
called "Henry the Turd".
1327
00:58:31,199 --> 00:58:33,039
Henry the Turd?
- Henry the Turd.
1328
00:58:33,119 --> 00:58:34,559
Oh, my God.
1329
00:58:38,000 --> 00:58:39,440
Have you been downstairs?
1330
00:58:39,480 --> 00:58:40,920
Downstairs? Oh, still?
1331
00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:43,280
Well, this joint is like
an expo lasagne -
1332
00:58:43,360 --> 00:58:44,800
there's layers and layers.
1333
00:58:44,880 --> 00:58:46,559
I'm serious.
- Oh, yeah?
1334
00:58:46,639 --> 00:58:48,800
So it's the same... Well,
I'm going down there now.
1335
00:58:48,880 --> 00:58:51,000
If you want, you can follow me,
it's right underneath us.
1336
00:58:51,079 --> 00:58:52,599
Do you wanna follow...?
Yeah, grab your mates.
1337
00:58:52,679 --> 00:58:54,480
'Cause I'm walking
down there anyway.
1338
00:58:54,559 --> 00:58:55,880
How are you going, mate?
1339
00:58:55,960 --> 00:58:57,199
Kenny from Australia.
Hey, mate.
1340
00:58:57,320 --> 00:58:59,320
So, what brings you guys here? What
brings you...?
1341
00:58:59,400 --> 00:59:01,039
We're having
the World Expo next year,
1342
00:59:01,119 --> 00:59:04,920
and just looking for
the luxury toilets for that event.
1343
00:59:05,000 --> 00:59:07,440
Oh, OK, like with all the
good taps, all the good basins
1344
00:59:07,480 --> 00:59:08,920
and the televisions,
and all that sort of...
1345
00:59:09,000 --> 00:59:10,400
Televisions?
1346
00:59:10,480 --> 00:59:12,599
Yeah, well, obviously
all the good stuff you want in it.
1347
00:59:12,679 --> 00:59:14,480
Whatever you're looking for,
you'll find it here, mate.
1348
00:59:14,519 --> 00:59:15,960
They've got everything.
Right.
1349
00:59:16,000 --> 00:59:17,440
That's fantastic.
1350
00:59:17,480 --> 00:59:19,559
It's on wheels.
Fits in a freight elevator.
1351
00:59:19,639 --> 00:59:21,559
You can be taking a...
going to the bathroom,
1352
00:59:21,639 --> 00:59:23,440
and the guy can be pissing
in the back.
1353
00:59:23,480 --> 00:59:25,440
Oh, look at this.
You can be taking a piss.
1354
00:59:25,480 --> 00:59:27,360
While watching the other
guy taking a shit.
1355
00:59:27,440 --> 00:59:29,000
(Laughs)
What you doing down there?
1356
00:59:29,079 --> 00:59:31,000
You guys have a convention
like this in Australia?
1357
00:59:31,039 --> 00:59:32,599
No, mate, we got nothing.
Not like this.
1358
00:59:32,679 --> 00:59:34,400
If you're talking about beer,
1359
00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:36,119
there's a convention
every afternoon.
1360
00:59:36,199 --> 00:59:37,519
(Man laughs)
1361
00:59:39,760 --> 00:59:42,320
(Mutters) I see, they've got
a spring that goes into the...
1362
00:59:42,400 --> 00:59:43,960
How do they get that
to go in...?
1363
00:59:56,159 --> 00:59:57,679
(Crowd chants) Who?!
WOMAN: Why?
1364
00:59:57,800 --> 00:59:59,159
(Crowd chants) Why?!
1365
00:59:59,280 --> 01:00:01,000
When?!
1366
01:00:01,039 --> 01:00:02,599
Why?!
1367
01:00:02,679 --> 01:00:04,320
MAN: That was great!
1368
01:00:04,400 --> 01:00:05,920
Wow!
1369
01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:07,960
MAN: Ladies and gentlemen,
Robin Crow.
1370
01:00:10,400 --> 01:00:13,360
(Plays jangly guitar music)
1371
01:00:22,840 --> 01:00:25,519
(Sings) # It's a natural reaction
1372
01:00:25,599 --> 01:00:28,320
# Wanting to make
those quantum leaps
1373
01:00:28,400 --> 01:00:31,000
# But I'm not afraid
to jump off that ledge
1374
01:00:31,039 --> 01:00:33,000
# I'm not afraid
to dive in deep. #
1375
01:00:36,519 --> 01:00:37,960
Thank you.
1376
01:00:38,000 --> 01:00:40,039
( APPLAUSE )
1377
01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:45,480
That was all very impressive,
wasn't it?
1378
01:00:45,559 --> 01:00:48,199
Very...very advanced,
I thought, the information.
1379
01:00:48,320 --> 01:00:49,679
Very futuristic.
1380
01:00:49,800 --> 01:00:51,400
He was talking about
the 'aloominum' pipes,
1381
01:00:51,480 --> 01:00:52,480
at one point.
1382
01:00:52,519 --> 01:00:53,960
I spent that long
trying to figure out
1383
01:00:54,000 --> 01:00:54,960
what 'aloominum' was
1384
01:00:55,000 --> 01:00:57,360
that I missed out what the point was of
fixing the pipe,
1385
01:00:57,440 --> 01:00:58,880
but some good information there, I
think.
1386
01:00:58,960 --> 01:01:02,000
I think I'll be able to use some
of that in dealing with people.
1387
01:01:02,039 --> 01:01:04,360
And I got a certificate,
1388
01:01:04,440 --> 01:01:07,000
attendance recognition certificate.
1389
01:01:07,079 --> 01:01:08,519
It's not bad, is it?
1390
01:01:25,480 --> 01:01:29,400
Yes, could I be put through
to room 176, please?
1391
01:01:31,400 --> 01:01:32,840
Yeah, Jackie, it's Kenny.
1392
01:01:33,880 --> 01:01:35,920
Yeah, good.
1393
01:01:36,000 --> 01:01:37,440
Yes.
1394
01:01:37,480 --> 01:01:39,000
Yeah, on...on the card?
1395
01:01:40,079 --> 01:01:41,639
Yes. (Chuckles)
1396
01:01:41,760 --> 01:01:43,760
Yourself?
1397
01:01:43,840 --> 01:01:45,840
Oh, fantastic.
1398
01:01:45,920 --> 01:01:48,039
How long for?
1399
01:01:48,119 --> 01:01:50,360
Yeah, love to!
1400
01:01:50,440 --> 01:01:52,199
Yeah, well, I've only just
come into my room
1401
01:01:52,320 --> 01:01:53,960
so I've just gotta
spruce meself up
1402
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:55,880
with a bit of cut and polish.
1403
01:01:55,960 --> 01:01:58,079
There's a couple of hours
in that!
1404
01:01:58,159 --> 01:02:00,519
What's that? On a horse?
1405
01:02:00,599 --> 01:02:02,920
Oh, OK. (Chuckles) Yeah.
1406
01:02:03,000 --> 01:02:06,000
Alright, well, I'll see you
in...at the Wildhorse.
1407
01:02:11,880 --> 01:02:13,800
Well, this is definitely it.
1408
01:02:13,880 --> 01:02:17,199
That's the Wildhorse.
I just asked the security bloke.
1409
01:02:18,280 --> 01:02:21,159
This all feels a bit... bit silly.
1410
01:02:21,280 --> 01:02:22,840
I mean, I've got
nothing to wear.
1411
01:02:22,920 --> 01:02:24,679
I didn't know we were
gonna be going out.
1412
01:02:24,800 --> 01:02:26,159
This is a dance club
or something.
1413
01:02:26,280 --> 01:02:28,800
They do linedancing
or something in there.
1414
01:02:28,880 --> 01:02:31,079
And, you know, I...
1415
01:02:31,159 --> 01:02:34,079
..I can't help but think
she thinks I'm rich.
1416
01:02:34,159 --> 01:02:36,639
You know, she met me
in business class, you know.
1417
01:02:36,760 --> 01:02:38,760
She probably thinks I'm loaded.
1418
01:02:38,840 --> 01:02:41,000
And it was all because I'm
bloody sitting in Glenn's seat.
1419
01:02:41,079 --> 01:02:42,760
I'm filling in for him.
1420
01:02:42,840 --> 01:02:45,639
Anyway, I promised
I'd meet her.
1421
01:02:47,559 --> 01:02:51,960
(Man sings) # I got my own problems,
baby
1422
01:02:52,000 --> 01:02:55,840
# Tell somebody else, baby
1423
01:02:55,920 --> 01:02:59,639
# I got my own problems, baby
1424
01:02:59,760 --> 01:03:03,159
# Tell somebody else, baby... #
1425
01:03:30,960 --> 01:03:32,840
Whoops! Here's our chance.
1426
01:03:32,920 --> 01:03:34,320
JACKIE: That's fantastic.
1427
01:03:34,400 --> 01:03:36,079
You know that guy
Randy Travis, the singer?
1428
01:03:36,159 --> 01:03:37,559
Yeah, yeah, the country singer, yeah.
1429
01:03:37,639 --> 01:03:39,119
He started as
a dishwasher here
1430
01:03:39,199 --> 01:03:41,800
and his first pay cheque
is in a frame on that wall.
1431
01:03:41,880 --> 01:03:43,599
Oh, you're kidding!
Nuh.
1432
01:03:43,679 --> 01:03:45,559
Isn't that fantastic?
It's amazing.
1433
01:03:45,639 --> 01:03:47,119
And Gorbachev, he was here.
1434
01:03:47,199 --> 01:03:49,480
He was a country singer?
- No, he's not a country singer!
1435
01:03:49,559 --> 01:03:51,119
Oh, he's the guy
from Russia. I know.
1436
01:03:51,199 --> 01:03:53,000
But all sorts of people,
all sorts of country...
1437
01:03:53,079 --> 01:03:55,440
If you stay here long enough...
- You get to see them.
1438
01:03:55,480 --> 01:03:57,960
It's a different world, isn't it?
It's a different place.
1439
01:03:58,000 --> 01:04:00,159
Look at the size of these ribs!
(Laughs) - It's huge!
1440
01:04:00,280 --> 01:04:02,280
No wonder they know what
they're doing with their toilets.
1441
01:04:02,360 --> 01:04:03,280
Look at the size of that.
1442
01:04:03,360 --> 01:04:05,159
They must give their
toilets a flogging over here.
1443
01:04:05,280 --> 01:04:06,840
That's why they're experts in it.
1444
01:04:07,880 --> 01:04:10,079
I'm sorry - I just realised
I always talk about
1445
01:04:10,159 --> 01:04:12,079
working with toilets
and poo and stuff
1446
01:04:12,159 --> 01:04:13,920
and it's only because
it's what I do.
1447
01:04:14,000 --> 01:04:15,400
No, that's fine.
- I'm used to it.
1448
01:04:15,480 --> 01:04:17,119
Don't worry.
Don't worry, it's fine.
1449
01:04:17,199 --> 01:04:19,000
I mean, I do the same thing,
you know?
1450
01:04:19,079 --> 01:04:20,480
What? You don't...
1451
01:04:20,559 --> 01:04:22,960
I do the same thing,
but 30,000 feet up in the air.
1452
01:04:23,000 --> 01:04:24,599
You have to clean the toilets?
Yeah.
1453
01:04:24,679 --> 01:04:26,599
Really?
Yeah, absolutely.
1454
01:04:26,679 --> 01:04:29,119
This guy in first class
had gone to the bathroom,
1455
01:04:29,199 --> 01:04:31,000
flushed the toilet,
1456
01:04:31,079 --> 01:04:33,280
put the vacuum - I don't know,
for whatever reason -
1457
01:04:33,360 --> 01:04:34,480
reverse cycled.
1458
01:04:34,519 --> 01:04:37,639
He came out
covered head to toe.
1459
01:04:37,760 --> 01:04:39,199
Oh, you're kidding.
No.
1460
01:04:39,320 --> 01:04:40,679
( MOBILE PHONE RINGS )
It's alright.
1461
01:04:40,800 --> 01:04:42,639
Hello?
1462
01:04:43,840 --> 01:04:45,559
Oh, hello.
1463
01:04:45,639 --> 01:04:48,400
I mean, if you can't control him from the
lounge room,
1464
01:04:48,480 --> 01:04:51,079
how am I supposed to do it
from Nashville, Tennessee?
1465
01:04:52,480 --> 01:04:55,840
Yeah, well...
Well, pop him on the phone.
1466
01:04:55,920 --> 01:04:57,960
G'day, mate.
1467
01:04:58,000 --> 01:04:59,440
It's my boy.
1468
01:04:59,480 --> 01:05:01,000
How you doing?
1469
01:05:01,079 --> 01:05:03,440
I'm good, mate. I'm fantastic.
1470
01:05:04,480 --> 01:05:06,000
And a what?
1471
01:05:06,079 --> 01:05:08,320
Yeah, well, you might want
to just hold it there, mate,
1472
01:05:08,400 --> 01:05:09,800
'cause that's a fair bit.
1473
01:05:09,880 --> 01:05:11,840
I don't know
if I'll fit it on the plane.
1474
01:05:11,920 --> 01:05:12,880
We'll have to hire
another plane!
1475
01:05:12,960 --> 01:05:14,400
Yeah, and behave yourself,
will you?
1476
01:05:14,480 --> 01:05:18,000
Don't... Don't upset
your mum too much.
1477
01:05:18,039 --> 01:05:19,920
Alright. Love you, mate.
1478
01:05:20,000 --> 01:05:22,920
That's me ex-wife
that rung me up.
1479
01:05:23,000 --> 01:05:24,480
She's something else.
1480
01:05:24,519 --> 01:05:27,400
She is the chief commissioner
and senior sergeant
1481
01:05:27,480 --> 01:05:28,880
of the fun police.
1482
01:05:28,960 --> 01:05:32,119
She's here to outlaw fun altogether.
There's your pad.
1483
01:05:32,199 --> 01:05:33,639
Thanks for that.
- Thank you.
1484
01:05:33,760 --> 01:05:36,320
Every time, every time
without fail
1485
01:05:36,400 --> 01:05:38,639
that I'm having a good time,
or I'm enjoying myself,
1486
01:05:38,760 --> 01:05:40,920
or I'm not at work
and I'm just calming down,
1487
01:05:41,000 --> 01:05:42,480
or like I'm here, she rings.
1488
01:05:42,519 --> 01:05:44,920
Well, glad you're having
a good time.
1489
01:05:45,000 --> 01:05:46,519
I am having a good time.
- Yeah.
1490
01:05:46,599 --> 01:05:48,599
Don't say that out loud
'cause she'll ring again.
1491
01:05:48,679 --> 01:05:51,039
(Laughs)
She knows.
1492
01:05:51,119 --> 01:05:53,480
Now, I've got a small confession to
make.
1493
01:05:53,519 --> 01:05:54,480
Oh, really?
1494
01:05:54,519 --> 01:05:56,840
Yeah, a bit of an apology
or a confession.
1495
01:05:56,920 --> 01:05:59,280
I'd never been on an aeroplane
or seen the toilets on them
1496
01:05:59,360 --> 01:06:01,320
so I wanted to know
how it worked.
1497
01:06:01,400 --> 01:06:04,440
So I pulled the lid
off the back of it
1498
01:06:04,480 --> 01:06:07,440
and I left one of the clips off.
1499
01:06:07,480 --> 01:06:08,440
Are you serious?
1500
01:06:08,480 --> 01:06:10,440
And I didn't put
the thing back on.
1501
01:06:10,480 --> 01:06:11,920
(Laughs)
So, sorry.
1502
01:06:12,000 --> 01:06:13,400
It's working now, isn't it?
1503
01:06:13,480 --> 01:06:16,000
I got it fixed, didn't I?
- Yeah, it's fine, it's fine.
1504
01:06:16,039 --> 01:06:17,760
Anyway, let's not...
- Oh, God.
1505
01:06:17,840 --> 01:06:19,840
It works now. You should eat.
- Yeah, I will.
1506
01:06:19,920 --> 01:06:21,320
Before your meal gets warm,
1507
01:06:21,400 --> 01:06:22,800
and I should
before mine gets cold.
1508
01:06:22,880 --> 01:06:24,280
Look at the size of this thing.
1509
01:06:24,360 --> 01:06:26,400
No wonder there's no longer
dinosaurs on the earth.
1510
01:06:26,480 --> 01:06:28,920
They've killed the last one.
Here it is on me plate!
1511
01:06:32,119 --> 01:06:34,400
There you go, Jackie.
Watch the gutter there.
1512
01:06:34,480 --> 01:06:36,199
Watch your step. You right?
- Oh, thanks, Kenny.
1513
01:06:36,320 --> 01:06:37,679
Just watch it there, Jackie.
- Thank you.
1514
01:06:37,800 --> 01:06:39,360
Don't slip over. I'd hate that.
- Ooh!
1515
01:06:39,440 --> 01:06:40,880
Alright, well,
I'll see you later, then.
1516
01:06:40,960 --> 01:06:43,599
Oh, thanks. Hey, listen, do you
want a lift? It's pouring rain.
1517
01:06:43,679 --> 01:06:45,679
No, it's fine, I'm only just...
- I'll take you somewhere.
1518
01:06:45,800 --> 01:06:47,519
No, I'm only a couple of blocks
from here.
1519
01:06:47,599 --> 01:06:48,519
I don't mind walking.
1520
01:06:48,599 --> 01:06:50,280
Are you sure?
- Yeah, I love the rain.
1521
01:06:50,360 --> 01:06:52,000
I honestly do.
- You're crazy.
1522
01:06:52,039 --> 01:06:53,960
(Laughs) I'll see you later.
- Hey, listen.
1523
01:06:54,000 --> 01:06:55,440
You know, I've got
tomorrow off
1524
01:06:55,480 --> 01:06:57,679
so maybe I could help you
shop for your son.
1525
01:06:57,800 --> 01:06:59,360
Yeah.
- I could show you Nashville.
1526
01:06:59,440 --> 01:07:01,119
Alright, well,
I've got a deal for you.
1527
01:07:01,199 --> 01:07:02,599
You show me round Nashville
1528
01:07:02,679 --> 01:07:04,079
and I'll show you
round the expo
1529
01:07:04,159 --> 01:07:05,920
so you can see
what I do for a job.
1530
01:07:06,000 --> 01:07:07,519
OK, that's a good deal.
- Wanna do that?
1531
01:07:07,599 --> 01:07:09,000
I'd love to.
- Oh, that'd be great.
1532
01:07:09,079 --> 01:07:11,519
Well, we'll meet, say,
9:30 at the front, yeah?
1533
01:07:11,599 --> 01:07:13,039
Yep, 9:30 at the front.
- Alright.
1534
01:07:13,119 --> 01:07:14,519
OK.
- That's perfect.
1535
01:07:14,599 --> 01:07:16,960
Put your belt on. You'll get
yourself in trouble. You right?
1536
01:07:18,840 --> 01:07:20,280
She's a nice girl, isn't she?
1537
01:07:22,159 --> 01:07:24,960
Looks like I'm gonna have
half a day off!
1538
01:07:25,000 --> 01:07:26,840
Which would be good.
1539
01:07:26,920 --> 01:07:28,599
Good on her.
1540
01:07:28,679 --> 01:07:31,800
(Laughs incredulously)
1541
01:07:33,039 --> 01:07:34,480
Good on her.
1542
01:07:53,000 --> 01:07:55,199
You know, it must be
very difficult for Jackie
1543
01:07:55,320 --> 01:07:57,000
to do a job like she does,
1544
01:07:57,079 --> 01:07:59,039
you know,
flying around in the air
1545
01:07:59,119 --> 01:08:00,800
in a tube full of strangers,
1546
01:08:00,880 --> 01:08:02,400
lob in countries
with people you don't know.
1547
01:08:02,480 --> 01:08:05,760
You know, it sounds very glamorous
but I'm sure it's not.
1548
01:08:05,840 --> 01:08:08,559
You know, and even I've found
since I've been over here
1549
01:08:08,639 --> 01:08:11,519
that you see things that
make about as much sense
1550
01:08:11,599 --> 01:08:13,840
as a nun at a rock concert,
you know.
1551
01:08:13,920 --> 01:08:16,560
And sometimes you just want to turn to
someone from home
1552
01:08:16,640 --> 01:08:19,680
and say, "Did you understand
what he's talking about?"
1553
01:08:19,760 --> 01:08:21,119
I mean, has someone
rung the Queen
1554
01:08:21,199 --> 01:08:23,439
and let her know what they're doing
with her language?
1555
01:08:39,720 --> 01:08:40,640
MAN: Ladies and gentlemen,
1556
01:08:40,720 --> 01:08:42,680
put your hands together
for the next bullfighter!
1557
01:08:45,560 --> 01:08:47,880
This is the way we do it
in Nashville, Tennessee...
1558
01:08:49,399 --> 01:08:51,119
There you go.
- Ooh. Look at this guy.
1559
01:08:51,199 --> 01:08:53,000
..show up, drink shots
and have fun.
1560
01:08:56,399 --> 01:08:57,840
Hey.
1561
01:08:57,920 --> 01:08:59,680
I reckon I know
who that guy is.
1562
01:08:59,760 --> 01:09:01,800
Serious. I met him yesterday.
1563
01:09:01,880 --> 01:09:03,159
Like, he's not a mate.
1564
01:09:03,239 --> 01:09:04,640
I met him.
He's a Japanese businessman.
1565
01:09:07,720 --> 01:09:09,319
MAN: Go, boy! Hee-hoo!
1566
01:09:09,399 --> 01:09:11,319
You would not get me
on that thing
1567
01:09:11,399 --> 01:09:12,840
for all the money in China.
1568
01:09:12,920 --> 01:09:14,319
Or Japan.
1569
01:09:19,800 --> 01:09:22,920
MAN: 20! Whoa! Whoa, there!
1570
01:09:24,359 --> 01:09:25,359
(Laughs)
1571
01:09:25,439 --> 01:09:28,000
Mate, you looked fantastic in there. That
was a pretty big fall.
1572
01:09:28,079 --> 01:09:29,520
You looked like
the bloody Sushi Cowboy
1573
01:09:29,600 --> 01:09:30,680
up there on the bull.
1574
01:09:30,760 --> 01:09:33,119
(Laughs) Sushi Cowboy.
- Sushi Cowboy.
1575
01:09:33,199 --> 01:09:34,800
It's not that great, man.
1576
01:09:34,880 --> 01:09:36,439
Where's all your mates?
Where's all your buddies?
1577
01:09:36,560 --> 01:09:39,000
Oh, they're at Hooters,
you know, with the big, big...
1578
01:09:39,079 --> 01:09:40,800
Oh, hello. Bing bong.
Yes.
1579
01:09:40,880 --> 01:09:43,000
But you guys go ahead, so...
1580
01:09:43,079 --> 01:09:44,840
I go back to the hotel.
1581
01:09:44,920 --> 01:09:47,800
Oh, there's no need for you
to go back to the hotel, mate.
1582
01:09:47,880 --> 01:09:50,640
Don't let a bloody sore leg and
a bad back stand in the way
1583
01:09:50,720 --> 01:09:51,720
of a good night.
1584
01:09:51,800 --> 01:09:54,119
You can stay with us, if
you want. We've got no plans.
1585
01:09:54,199 --> 01:09:56,239
What do you want to do?
1586
01:09:57,600 --> 01:10:00,000
MAN: Give it up for
the Sushi Cowboy!
1587
01:10:00,039 --> 01:10:02,399
(Sings) # I...
1588
01:10:02,520 --> 01:10:04,319
# Once was lost... #
1589
01:10:06,960 --> 01:10:08,800
# I'm found
1590
01:10:08,880 --> 01:10:12,119
# I once was blind
1591
01:10:12,199 --> 01:10:18,239
# But now I see... #
1592
01:10:18,319 --> 01:10:21,159
( CHEERING )
1593
01:10:21,239 --> 01:10:23,640
Hello, Nashville!
MAN: Sushi Cowboy!
1594
01:10:23,720 --> 01:10:26,680
( CHEERING AND APPLAUSE )
1595
01:10:29,199 --> 01:10:31,239
He's had a pretty big night,
hasn't he?
1596
01:10:31,319 --> 01:10:33,239
He sure has.
His bull-riding days are over.
1597
01:10:33,319 --> 01:10:34,800
(Laughs)
1598
01:10:40,359 --> 01:10:41,720
What time do you fly out tomorrow?
1599
01:10:41,800 --> 01:10:42,720
3:30.
1600
01:10:42,800 --> 01:10:45,039
Oh, OK, so pretty early.
Yeah.
1601
01:10:45,119 --> 01:10:46,840
Sorry, I'll get your lift.
1602
01:10:46,920 --> 01:10:48,439
Well, thanks
for inviting me out tonight.
1603
01:10:48,560 --> 01:10:50,000
I had a ball, Jackie, I real...
1604
01:10:50,039 --> 01:10:51,439
Did you?
- I honestly did. I did.
1605
01:10:51,560 --> 01:10:53,319
Oh, good. I'm glad you came.
It was fun.
1606
01:10:53,399 --> 01:10:55,800
Yeah, so am I. Here's your lift.
- Oh, thanks.
1607
01:10:55,880 --> 01:10:58,680
Well, um, do you want to
go up to the bar?
1608
01:10:58,760 --> 01:11:00,119
I...
A drink or something?
1609
01:11:00,199 --> 01:11:02,560
I'd love to, Jackie,
but I really should...
1610
01:11:02,640 --> 01:11:04,640
I mean, the bar's open
for another hour.
1611
01:11:04,720 --> 01:11:06,279
Yeah, I would,
but the meter's running
1612
01:11:06,359 --> 01:11:09,359
and I better get the Sushi Cowboy back
home safe.
1613
01:11:09,439 --> 01:11:11,520
He's off with the fairies, so...
- OK.
1614
01:11:11,600 --> 01:11:13,880
But, look, tomorrow,
if you're free tomorrow,
1615
01:11:13,960 --> 01:11:15,760
I'd love to see you
before you go.
1616
01:11:15,840 --> 01:11:17,119
That would be great.
1617
01:11:17,199 --> 01:11:18,640
Have a coffee
at the bar at midday?
1618
01:11:18,720 --> 01:11:19,640
I'd love that.
1619
01:11:19,720 --> 01:11:21,439
That'd be really fun.
- Well, I'll come back tomorrow.
1620
01:11:21,560 --> 01:11:23,319
OK.
Yeah? Just watch out.
1621
01:11:23,399 --> 01:11:26,399
That lift is gonna snap you like
a twig if it closes on your chest.
1622
01:11:26,520 --> 01:11:27,399
OK.
1623
01:11:27,520 --> 01:11:28,680
You're right to get
to your room?
1624
01:11:28,760 --> 01:11:30,119
Yeah.
- Alright.
1625
01:11:30,199 --> 01:11:32,000
Well, thanks for a good night.
I had fun.
1626
01:11:32,039 --> 01:11:33,600
OK. 'Night.
- Alright. Take care, Jackie.
1627
01:11:33,680 --> 01:11:35,079
'Bye, Kenny.
- See you. 'Bye.
1628
01:11:42,159 --> 01:11:45,079
(Both laugh)
1629
01:11:45,159 --> 01:11:48,279
Yeah, mate, that goes into
Ned Kelly's helmet there.
1630
01:11:48,359 --> 01:11:50,039
Right.
- Oh. Right, I see.
1631
01:11:50,119 --> 01:11:51,880
There you go. You're in now.
Good.
1632
01:11:51,960 --> 01:11:53,920
Thanks for a great night, mate.
- Thank you very much.
1633
01:11:54,000 --> 01:11:55,680
I'm really sorry
to mess up the night.
1634
01:11:55,760 --> 01:11:57,960
No, you didn't mess it up.
- You and your lady.
1635
01:11:58,000 --> 01:11:59,319
I'm sorry.
- No, it's all good.
1636
01:11:59,399 --> 01:12:00,720
But I had a good time.
1637
01:12:00,800 --> 01:12:02,520
Thank you.
- Me too. See you at the expo.
1638
01:12:02,600 --> 01:12:04,319
Maybe tomorrow morning... (Coughs)
1639
01:12:04,399 --> 01:12:06,920
..tomorrow morning
you could show me
1640
01:12:07,000 --> 01:12:09,039
where the TV toilets are.
1641
01:12:09,119 --> 01:12:10,920
Oh, I don't know
if they've got any here.
1642
01:12:11,079 --> 01:12:13,640
Well, I mentioned them
because we make them.
1643
01:12:13,720 --> 01:12:15,439
You make them?
- Yeah.
1644
01:12:15,560 --> 01:12:17,199
Oh, really?
- Fair dinkum.
1645
01:12:19,000 --> 01:12:20,920
Yeah, Glenn, it's me.
1646
01:12:20,960 --> 01:12:23,000
Yeah, look, I've gotta be quick.
1647
01:12:23,039 --> 01:12:26,159
I'm in a meeting with
some Japanese gentlemen
1648
01:12:26,239 --> 01:12:28,600
that I've met here at the expo
1649
01:12:28,680 --> 01:12:31,520
and what they wanted to do
is get a quote
1650
01:12:31,600 --> 01:12:35,520
on buying some of our
20-foot combo units,
1651
01:12:35,600 --> 01:12:39,720
the VIP 20-foot blocks
with the televisions in them.
1652
01:12:39,800 --> 01:12:42,840
But they want a price on them
really quickly
1653
01:12:42,920 --> 01:12:45,520
to buy about six or seven units,
1654
01:12:45,600 --> 01:12:47,399
as in the full blocks.
1655
01:12:47,520 --> 01:12:49,079
Yep. Hang on a sec, Glenn.
1656
01:12:49,159 --> 01:12:50,600
67.
- What?
1657
01:12:50,680 --> 01:12:52,840
It's not "six or seven",
it's sixty-seven.
1658
01:12:52,920 --> 01:12:54,520
Sixty-sev... You're shitting me,
aren't you?
1659
01:12:54,600 --> 01:12:58,159
No, serious. - 67...
- 67 full 20-foot blocks?
1660
01:12:58,239 --> 01:12:59,319
Units.
Units.
1661
01:12:59,399 --> 01:13:00,880
They want 67 of them.
1662
01:13:01,960 --> 01:13:03,520
No, he's as serious
as a heart attack.
1663
01:13:03,600 --> 01:13:05,119
No, I'm here with him now.
1664
01:13:05,199 --> 01:13:07,159
Also, we'd like to get a price.
- A price.
1665
01:13:07,239 --> 01:13:09,439
In one hour.
- One hour. In an hour.
1666
01:13:09,560 --> 01:13:10,960
No, he's fair dinkum.
1667
01:13:11,000 --> 01:13:14,199
Yeah, 67 units, but we need
the price in an hour.
1668
01:13:14,279 --> 01:13:16,359
And Mr Sato is coming.
- Yeah, I know.
1669
01:13:16,439 --> 01:13:18,640
I know I called him, you know,
a freaked-out bastard,
1670
01:13:18,720 --> 01:13:22,000
but he's a bastard
to me only, not to you.
1671
01:13:22,079 --> 01:13:23,239
Right.
1672
01:13:23,319 --> 01:13:24,760
See? So just
speak to him directly.
1673
01:13:24,840 --> 01:13:26,439
Right, talk to him.
- Into his eyes.
1674
01:13:26,560 --> 01:13:28,000
OK.
- You talk to him.
1675
01:13:28,039 --> 01:13:30,840
And I will translate because
he doesn't speak any English.
1676
01:13:30,920 --> 01:13:32,640
He doesn't speak any English?
- No, no, no.
1677
01:13:32,720 --> 01:13:35,119
So just speak to him
and I'll translate.
1678
01:13:35,199 --> 01:13:36,840
Oh, you'll translate.
I know what you're saying.
1679
01:13:36,920 --> 01:13:38,279
Be yourself.
- Yeah, I will.
1680
01:13:38,359 --> 01:13:40,159
( MOBILE PHONE RINGS )
Hang on a tick.
1681
01:13:40,239 --> 01:13:41,680
Answer this.
- Yeah, I will, yeah.
1682
01:13:41,760 --> 01:13:43,720
This could be Glenn now.
- Oh, yeah, check the price.
1683
01:13:43,800 --> 01:13:46,000
Yeah, I will, absolutely.
Hello? Glenn?
1684
01:13:46,039 --> 01:13:47,079
Sorry, Takashi.
1685
01:13:47,159 --> 01:13:48,600
I can't hear you, mate.
Speak up.
1686
01:13:48,680 --> 01:13:50,680
Oh, g'day, mate. Yeah, good.
1687
01:13:50,760 --> 01:13:52,279
Look, Dave,
I can't talk now, mate.
1688
01:13:52,359 --> 01:13:56,640
I'm in the mid... Yeah, hang on,
I'm in the middle of a... Yep.
1689
01:13:56,720 --> 01:13:58,119
When did that happen?
1690
01:13:59,720 --> 01:14:01,279
Yeah.
1691
01:14:01,359 --> 01:14:03,640
Well, is he...? Are you
with him now? Is he alright?
1692
01:14:06,119 --> 01:14:07,560
Right.
1693
01:14:07,640 --> 01:14:10,399
Well, what do the doctors say?
What do...?
1694
01:14:10,520 --> 01:14:12,399
Well, yeah, hang on, don't...
1695
01:14:14,079 --> 01:14:15,520
Well, can you ring me
straight back
1696
01:14:15,600 --> 01:14:16,760
when you've spoken
to the doctors?
1697
01:14:16,840 --> 01:14:20,039
Yeah. Alright, yeah,
but ring me back so I... Yeah.
1698
01:14:26,720 --> 01:14:29,119
Everything's alright. Take care of your
dad, you know.
1699
01:14:29,199 --> 01:14:30,640
Yeah.
- I'll speak with Glenn.
1700
01:14:30,720 --> 01:14:32,520
Yeah, you can speak to him?
- Oh, yeah.
1701
01:14:32,600 --> 01:14:34,800
I'm so sorry, mate.
- That's... That's alright.
1702
01:14:34,880 --> 01:14:36,239
Alright, mate, well,
I'll speak to you
1703
01:14:36,319 --> 01:14:37,520
when I get back to Australia.
1704
01:14:37,600 --> 01:14:38,640
Right.
- Alright, thank you.
1705
01:14:38,720 --> 01:14:39,800
See you, mate.
1706
01:14:42,000 --> 01:14:43,640
Better get my belt on. See you!
1707
01:14:45,720 --> 01:14:48,960
Just to the airport, mate.
1708
01:14:49,000 --> 01:14:51,000
The international.
1709
01:14:51,079 --> 01:14:53,520
Yeah, well, I'm supposed to be
meeting her at the bar.
1710
01:14:53,600 --> 01:14:55,000
Well, she's an airline steward
1711
01:14:55,079 --> 01:14:57,159
so she'll be dressed
in a uniform.
1712
01:14:57,239 --> 01:15:00,520
Well... Yeah, well, I actually don't know
her surname.
1713
01:15:00,600 --> 01:15:03,359
My father's very ill, so l...
Actually, don't tell her that,
1714
01:15:03,439 --> 01:15:06,880
Just tell her I'm really,
really sorry that I can't make it.
1715
01:15:17,000 --> 01:15:19,039
MAN: He's stable.
His obs are looking good.
1716
01:15:19,119 --> 01:15:22,760
The doctor should be in to talk
to you in a bit, but he's, um...
1717
01:15:22,840 --> 01:15:24,199
See, he's medicated
at the moment
1718
01:15:24,279 --> 01:15:26,159
and obviously exhausted
1719
01:15:26,239 --> 01:15:27,680
but he's not in any pain.
1720
01:15:27,760 --> 01:15:30,439
He's on a list for an operation
on Tuesday morning.
1721
01:15:30,560 --> 01:15:32,319
OK.
- So you can come back in...
1722
01:15:32,399 --> 01:15:33,359
When I rang the hospital
1723
01:15:33,439 --> 01:15:35,199
they said it was
a bleeding ulcer or something.
1724
01:15:35,279 --> 01:15:36,720
And so that's all it is?
1725
01:15:36,800 --> 01:15:39,000
If you're gonna talk about me,
at least talk to me.
1726
01:15:39,039 --> 01:15:42,039
I'm awake.
I'm not bloody dead, you know.
1727
01:15:42,119 --> 01:15:44,319
How are you, mate?
- Oh, how do you reckon I am?
1728
01:15:44,399 --> 01:15:46,920
Stuck in this shithole.
1729
01:15:47,000 --> 01:15:49,359
Where...?
Where have you been?
1730
01:15:49,439 --> 01:15:51,119
I got here as soon as I could.
1731
01:15:51,199 --> 01:15:53,439
I've come straight
from the airport.
1732
01:15:53,560 --> 01:15:55,159
Am I in your way here?
- No.
1733
01:15:55,239 --> 01:15:58,159
Ah. I mean, 70 years of age,
and wouldn't you know,
1734
01:15:58,239 --> 01:16:02,119
these pretty little things
like this girl here walking round
1735
01:16:02,199 --> 01:16:04,399
and I've been saddled
with Daisy here.
1736
01:16:04,520 --> 01:16:06,720
Bloody tailgater.
1737
01:16:06,800 --> 01:16:08,159
He's a nurse, Dad.
1738
01:16:08,239 --> 01:16:10,880
You haven't used your pan.
- I don't intend to use it, either.
1739
01:16:10,960 --> 01:16:12,720
There's no way known
I'm gonna use that.
1740
01:16:12,800 --> 01:16:15,600
You can shove it up your own arse. I'm
not putting it up mine.
1741
01:16:15,680 --> 01:16:17,039
Before you get
discharged tomorrow,
1742
01:16:17,119 --> 01:16:18,159
before your operation,
1743
01:16:18,239 --> 01:16:20,720
we need a stool to test
whether or not there's blood.
1744
01:16:20,800 --> 01:16:22,560
I'll give you one.
I'll give you a sample.
1745
01:16:22,640 --> 01:16:23,680
I'll give you one there
1746
01:16:23,760 --> 01:16:25,119
that Jack O'Toole
wouldn't chop through,
1747
01:16:25,199 --> 01:16:26,840
but I'm not doing it in that.
1748
01:16:26,920 --> 01:16:29,199
It's really quite simple.
See this?
1749
01:16:29,279 --> 01:16:30,800
Might be simple for you.
- See that?
1750
01:16:30,880 --> 01:16:33,000
It'd be like trying to put
marshmallow into a moneybox.
1751
01:16:33,039 --> 01:16:35,199
Now, I'm not gonna use it.
I'm telling you, son!
1752
01:16:35,279 --> 01:16:38,239
Alright, well, is it... is he OK
to go to the toilet if I take him?
1753
01:16:38,319 --> 01:16:39,800
Uh, if he would rather do that,
1754
01:16:39,880 --> 01:16:41,239
then, yeah, sure,
I can organise that.
1755
01:16:41,319 --> 01:16:43,159
But it's...
I need the stool in this tray.
1756
01:16:43,239 --> 01:16:45,399
OK. Alright.
I'll be back in a bit.
1757
01:16:45,520 --> 01:16:46,920
Nightmare, this.
- Yeah, well, it's not...
1758
01:16:47,000 --> 01:16:49,560
Don't be having a go at him.
He's the one looking after you.
1759
01:16:49,640 --> 01:16:51,920
Yeah, he's the one.
I'd rather HER look after me.
1760
01:16:52,000 --> 01:16:54,079
Yeah, well, it doesn't...
Look at her. Jesus Christ!
1761
01:16:54,159 --> 01:16:56,079
He wants me to bend over
in front of him.
1762
01:16:56,159 --> 01:16:57,079
Have you seen him?
1763
01:16:57,159 --> 01:16:59,399
It's not that he wants to see
your backside or something.
1764
01:16:59,520 --> 01:17:02,279
They need to get your stool sample,
your poo sample.
1765
01:17:02,359 --> 01:17:05,359
Christ Almighty,
I'm too old for this shit.
1766
01:17:05,439 --> 01:17:07,399
Bloody whinge.
That's all I get all day.
1767
01:17:07,520 --> 01:17:08,920
Whinge, whinge, whinge.
- Yeah.
1768
01:17:09,000 --> 01:17:11,079
Oh, get back on your camel.
1769
01:17:11,159 --> 01:17:13,840
Is that that bloody bastard
going again over there?
1770
01:17:13,920 --> 01:17:16,000
(Groans)
Must have disorder, mate.
1771
01:17:16,079 --> 01:17:19,199
Alright, you br... ba... bananas
1772
01:17:19,279 --> 01:17:21,119
or whatever you're
bloody talking about.
1773
01:17:21,199 --> 01:17:22,800
Dad. Dad.
- What?
1774
01:17:22,880 --> 01:17:25,000
This is not the place for it, Dad.
It's a hospital.
1775
01:17:25,079 --> 01:17:26,880
Now, keep your voice down.
They're sick too, alright?
1776
01:17:26,960 --> 01:17:29,079
Keep my voice down.
- Yeah, well, don't...
1777
01:17:29,159 --> 01:17:31,359
Supposed to be a bloody farmer. He's
got about 17 kids.
1778
01:17:31,439 --> 01:17:33,119
He hasn't had too much time picking
tomatoes,
1779
01:17:33,199 --> 01:17:34,439
I can tell you that.
1780
01:17:34,560 --> 01:17:37,399
Dad, they're sick too, so have
a bit of respect, alright?
1781
01:17:37,520 --> 01:17:39,000
Yeah, alright.
- Just a bit of respect.
1782
01:17:39,039 --> 01:17:41,000
Get all the nurses
and we'll move all this.
1783
01:17:45,000 --> 01:17:48,880
Bloody tubes up me nose
and up me arse.
1784
01:17:48,960 --> 01:17:51,279
Now they want bloody stools.
1785
01:17:51,359 --> 01:17:53,039
A man hasn't had
anything to eat.
1786
01:17:54,199 --> 01:17:55,640
I'm as thin as a bloody rake.
1787
01:17:55,720 --> 01:17:57,199
You can smell the shit
through me ribs.
1788
01:17:57,279 --> 01:17:59,239
They should take
a sample there.
1789
01:18:01,920 --> 01:18:04,039
Nurse, that's the sample
for Mr Smyth.
1790
01:18:04,119 --> 01:18:06,000
Right. Great, thanks.
Alright, thanks.
1791
01:18:07,600 --> 01:18:09,000
You can't get this
medication for him.
1792
01:18:09,039 --> 01:18:10,159
He's got to get it himself.
1793
01:18:10,239 --> 01:18:12,159
He's gotta get it himself? OK.
- Yeah, it's very important.
1794
01:18:12,239 --> 01:18:14,279
That's not... not today.
I want to go today.
1795
01:18:14,359 --> 01:18:16,039
No tomorrow.
Forget tomorrow. Today!
1796
01:18:16,119 --> 01:18:18,720
No, we've gotta leave you here
on all the gear for the night
1797
01:18:18,800 --> 01:18:20,159
to keep a monitor on you,
1798
01:18:20,239 --> 01:18:21,800
and then the operation
is next week.
1799
01:18:21,880 --> 01:18:23,520
The operation is next week?
What operation?
1800
01:18:23,600 --> 01:18:25,079
They've got you on
a schedule next week.
1801
01:18:25,159 --> 01:18:26,600
The operation on
your bloody stomach!
1802
01:18:26,680 --> 01:18:27,600
No operation.
1803
01:18:27,680 --> 01:18:29,800
I'm not having an operation,
especially not in here.
1804
01:18:29,880 --> 01:18:31,560
You only hear about
the success rate, son,
1805
01:18:31,640 --> 01:18:33,000
you don't hear
about their failures,
1806
01:18:33,079 --> 01:18:35,279
about people getting crook
a week after an operation,
1807
01:18:35,359 --> 01:18:36,920
them opening them up
when it's too late
1808
01:18:37,000 --> 01:18:38,359
and they've got
a bloody cutlery set
1809
01:18:38,439 --> 01:18:39,600
or scissors inside them
1810
01:18:39,680 --> 01:18:41,680
that are left inside them
by people that are incompetent.
1811
01:18:41,760 --> 01:18:43,319
Dad, you've gotta have
the operation.
1812
01:18:43,399 --> 01:18:44,840
If you don't have the operation,
1813
01:18:44,920 --> 01:18:46,079
there really will be
some trouble.
1814
01:18:46,159 --> 01:18:47,600
Dad, you have to have
the operation.
1815
01:18:47,680 --> 01:18:48,920
You can't say no to that.
1816
01:18:49,000 --> 01:18:51,000
Oh, we'll worry about that
when it's supposed to happen,
1817
01:18:51,039 --> 01:18:53,000
but today,
I'm going out today, son.
1818
01:18:53,039 --> 01:18:55,119
No, well, Dad,
you can't go out today,
1819
01:18:55,199 --> 01:18:57,000
but, look, you've only got
one more night here
1820
01:18:57,079 --> 01:18:58,880
and, uh...and
we'll get you out of here
1821
01:18:58,960 --> 01:19:00,920
and I'll come back tomorrow
and I'll pick you up...
1822
01:19:01,000 --> 01:19:03,000
Wait on, wait on,
where are you going, boy?
1823
01:19:03,039 --> 01:19:04,439
Don't... You're not going.
1824
01:19:04,560 --> 01:19:06,039
Christ, you're not going. You...
1825
01:19:06,119 --> 01:19:09,520
And as far as me going home to my
place or your place
1826
01:19:09,600 --> 01:19:11,000
or anyone's, that's not on.
1827
01:19:11,039 --> 01:19:13,239
I want you to ring your brother
and ring him now.
1828
01:19:13,319 --> 01:19:15,239
There's a couple of things we've gotta
sort out
1829
01:19:15,319 --> 01:19:17,920
in our family
before I shuffle off.
1830
01:19:18,000 --> 01:19:20,600
I'm telling you now. But don't
you leave me in here to rot.
1831
01:19:20,680 --> 01:19:22,439
Alright, Dad.
- Leave me in a place like this.
1832
01:19:22,560 --> 01:19:24,720
You may as well leave me
in the bloody morgue.
1833
01:19:24,800 --> 01:19:26,359
They'll carry me
out of here feet first
1834
01:19:26,439 --> 01:19:27,640
if you leave me in here.
1835
01:19:27,720 --> 01:19:28,640
Alright.
1836
01:19:28,720 --> 01:19:31,000
Wouldn't do that to a dog,
let alone your father.
1837
01:19:31,079 --> 01:19:33,279
I'll go and ring him now.
- Go and ring him now.
1838
01:19:33,359 --> 01:19:35,159
I'll be back.
- You make sure you come back.
1839
01:19:35,239 --> 01:19:36,680
Make sure of it.
- I will, Dad.
1840
01:19:36,760 --> 01:19:39,399
Don't leave me here.
- I won't. I'll be back.
1841
01:19:50,880 --> 01:19:53,399
DAD: Jesus Christ.
This is bloody ridiculous.
1842
01:19:53,520 --> 01:19:55,720
Why didn't we bring your car
instead of this bloody thing.
1843
01:19:55,800 --> 01:19:57,960
I'm jammed in here
as tight as a fish's arse.
1844
01:19:58,000 --> 01:20:00,159
Well, Dad, the toilet
wasn't gonna fit in my car,
1845
01:20:00,239 --> 01:20:02,800
and it sure as hell wasn't
gonna fit in Dave's Mercedes.
1846
01:20:02,880 --> 01:20:04,239
I was only thinking of you.
1847
01:20:04,319 --> 01:20:06,239
I brought the truck so
I could bring you a real toilet,
1848
01:20:06,319 --> 01:20:08,840
so you didn't have to dig a hole
to have a shit.
1849
01:20:13,039 --> 01:20:14,880
Now, see? That makes
no sense whatsoever.
1850
01:20:14,960 --> 01:20:16,319
You'll know the front
from the back.
1851
01:20:16,399 --> 01:20:18,439
The front will have
a door in it, you dickhead.
1852
01:20:19,520 --> 01:20:21,399
Next time youse come up with
an idea like this,
1853
01:20:21,520 --> 01:20:23,840
give me a bit of notice
so I can slash me wrists.
1854
01:20:23,920 --> 01:20:26,039
Just relax.
Alright. I'll tell you what.
1855
01:20:26,119 --> 01:20:28,079
All I want from you pair of
buffalo-headed bastards
1856
01:20:28,159 --> 01:20:29,079
on this trip
1857
01:20:29,159 --> 01:20:31,600
is for us to see
the sun come up,
1858
01:20:31,680 --> 01:20:33,760
and be there when the sun goes down.
1859
01:20:33,840 --> 01:20:36,000
In between times,
please yourself,
1860
01:20:36,079 --> 01:20:37,560
but keep out of my bloody hair.
1861
01:20:37,640 --> 01:20:39,600
But just get that up
so a man can have
1862
01:20:39,680 --> 01:20:42,119
somewhere to doss off tonight,
for Christ's sake.
1863
01:20:42,199 --> 01:20:44,039
It'll be up any second, Dad.
1864
01:20:52,920 --> 01:20:54,319
DAVE: He's asleep, isn't he?
1865
01:20:55,359 --> 01:20:56,920
Uh...yeah.
1866
01:20:57,000 --> 01:20:59,520
Look at him.
- He looks peaceful.
1867
01:20:59,600 --> 01:21:01,079
He looks terrifying.
- No, he doesn't.
1868
01:21:01,159 --> 01:21:02,600
He looks peaceful.
1869
01:21:02,680 --> 01:21:04,239
Oh, get out. Jesus.
1870
01:21:04,319 --> 01:21:06,720
Absolute fuckin' frog shit,
and you know it.
1871
01:21:06,800 --> 01:21:08,199
I mean, the bastard's not gonna die.
1872
01:21:08,279 --> 01:21:09,920
Jesus Christ.
He's gonna outlive both of us.
1873
01:21:10,000 --> 01:21:11,359
He's like a rhino.
1874
01:21:11,439 --> 01:21:13,359
Is this really that tough
for you, is it, Dave -
1875
01:21:13,439 --> 01:21:15,800
spending, you know,
one night together,
1876
01:21:15,880 --> 01:21:17,239
just you, me and Dad?
1877
01:21:17,319 --> 01:21:20,119
What? You want to wait
until he actually is dying?
1878
01:21:20,199 --> 01:21:21,920
Or until he's dead
and can't do this?
1879
01:21:23,520 --> 01:21:25,720
And you know damn well
why we've come out here.
1880
01:21:25,800 --> 01:21:28,840
You know damn well. This is
where he used to bring Mum.
1881
01:21:31,680 --> 01:21:34,680
( HARMONICA MUSIC )
1882
01:21:44,680 --> 01:21:46,920
Mum's been dead
a long time now,
1883
01:21:47,000 --> 01:21:48,760
but, look, a death in the family
1884
01:21:48,840 --> 01:21:50,840
has different effects
on different people.
1885
01:21:50,920 --> 01:21:54,600
For some families,
it brings them closer together.
1886
01:21:54,680 --> 01:21:57,880
But for other families,
you know, like our circus,
1887
01:21:57,960 --> 01:22:01,239
it's Christmas cards
at 20 paces.
1888
01:22:07,439 --> 01:22:09,560
DAD: While I've got
you two fellas here,
1889
01:22:09,640 --> 01:22:12,399
I want to talk to you
about something.
1890
01:22:12,520 --> 01:22:17,239
When I cark it,
I don't want any flash funeral.
1891
01:22:17,319 --> 01:22:20,399
Something nice and simple -
get on with it.
1892
01:22:20,520 --> 01:22:23,039
If either of you two blokes
want to say a couple of words,
1893
01:22:23,119 --> 01:22:24,560
well, that's up to you.
1894
01:22:24,640 --> 01:22:26,159
You can sort that out
after I've gone.
1895
01:22:26,239 --> 01:22:27,680
Just get it over with.
1896
01:22:27,760 --> 01:22:29,399
Tell 'em to light up
the Bunsen burner
1897
01:22:29,520 --> 01:22:31,520
and push her into the oven
and get her going.
1898
01:22:31,600 --> 01:22:33,640
And for Christ's sake,
one other thing.
1899
01:22:33,720 --> 01:22:35,720
Don't let your Uncle Terry
get involved,
1900
01:22:35,800 --> 01:22:37,159
because he'll balls it up,
1901
01:22:37,239 --> 01:22:39,000
like he did at
your grandmother's funeral.
1902
01:22:39,079 --> 01:22:40,760
So keep him
right out of it altogether.
1903
01:22:57,000 --> 01:22:59,359
( CAR HORN HONKS,
MAN YELLS )
1904
01:23:01,439 --> 01:23:03,760
What the bloody hell is it?
DAD: I don't know.
1905
01:23:03,840 --> 01:23:05,880
Could be a bloody
bunch of hoons
1906
01:23:05,960 --> 01:23:07,319
spotlight shooting out there.
1907
01:23:07,399 --> 01:23:08,880
For Christ's sake.
1908
01:23:17,520 --> 01:23:18,920
( CAR HORN HONKS )
1909
01:23:19,000 --> 01:23:21,000
MAN: Where the hell are you?
1910
01:23:27,640 --> 01:23:30,279
Jesus. What the bloody hell
would that be doing here?
1911
01:23:30,359 --> 01:23:33,600
It's for me. I'll see you guys
later. I've had a gutful of this.
1912
01:23:33,680 --> 01:23:36,000
What's up with him?
- I have no idea.
1913
01:23:36,079 --> 01:23:37,600
Jesus, Al,
what took you so long?
1914
01:23:37,680 --> 01:23:39,319
I've been looking
for you everywhere.
1915
01:23:39,399 --> 01:23:40,880
I couldn't find you.
1916
01:23:40,960 --> 01:23:42,960
Well, I'll be buggered.
1917
01:23:46,000 --> 01:23:48,039
Well, you know
what they say, son.
1918
01:23:48,119 --> 01:23:50,119
It's an old saying.
1919
01:23:50,199 --> 01:23:53,960
"The chef always ruins
his first batch of scones."
1920
01:23:54,000 --> 01:23:56,840
And there goes
my first burnt offering there.
1921
01:23:56,920 --> 01:24:00,359
He's as useless
as tits on a bull.
1922
01:24:01,640 --> 01:24:03,159
Maybe he had to
go back to work
1923
01:24:03,239 --> 01:24:04,439
for an important meeting or...
1924
01:24:04,560 --> 01:24:07,079
Kenny, you've gotta
stop doing that, boy.
1925
01:24:07,159 --> 01:24:08,600
The trouble is with you, son,
1926
01:24:08,680 --> 01:24:11,239
you've been...walking
in his shadow for so long.
1927
01:24:11,319 --> 01:24:13,520
Don't you realise,
if you take a step to the side,
1928
01:24:13,600 --> 01:24:15,039
you'll cast a shadow
of your own?
1929
01:24:15,119 --> 01:24:18,079
Let some other bastard
walk in yours for a change.
1930
01:24:18,159 --> 01:24:20,159
Wake up to yourself,
for Christ's sake.
1931
01:24:20,239 --> 01:24:21,720
I'm going to bed.
1932
01:24:24,640 --> 01:24:26,079
Dad?
1933
01:24:26,159 --> 01:24:27,640
Yeah, what is it?
1934
01:24:28,760 --> 01:24:30,960
I've... I've been offered
a promotion.
1935
01:24:31,000 --> 01:24:33,880
You've been offered a what?
- A promotion.
1936
01:24:33,960 --> 01:24:35,319
Glenn said he was
impressed with
1937
01:24:35,399 --> 01:24:38,239
the sale I did to
the Japanese in America,
1938
01:24:38,319 --> 01:24:41,079
and he's asked me to
run the office in Sydney.
1939
01:24:41,159 --> 01:24:42,600
Well, that's good.
1940
01:24:42,680 --> 01:24:44,600
When do you kick off?
When do you start her?
1941
01:24:44,680 --> 01:24:47,199
Oh, I haven't said yes yet.
I'm trying to make my mind up.
1942
01:24:47,279 --> 01:24:49,520
What do you mean?
Why haven't you said yes yet?
1943
01:24:49,600 --> 01:24:51,000
Well, you know,
I've gotta decide
1944
01:24:51,039 --> 01:24:53,399
whether I want to be
off the road, you know,
1945
01:24:53,520 --> 01:24:55,279
and I've been working
with the crew in Melbourne
1946
01:24:55,359 --> 01:24:56,800
for a long while, Dad.
1947
01:24:56,880 --> 01:24:58,359
Yeah, but what do you
want to do?
1948
01:24:58,439 --> 01:25:00,640
Do you want to be
a crap crawler all your life?
1949
01:25:00,720 --> 01:25:03,119
This is your chance for you
to get out of the shit.
1950
01:25:03,199 --> 01:25:06,760
But I don't know if
I'm cut out for just a desk job.
1951
01:25:06,840 --> 01:25:09,000
Well, you'll never know
until you give it a try.
1952
01:25:09,079 --> 01:25:10,520
Don't you realise in this world
1953
01:25:10,600 --> 01:25:13,960
that people don't look up to you
until you're sitting down?
1954
01:25:14,000 --> 01:25:15,399
Take the desk job.
1955
01:25:15,520 --> 01:25:18,239
I actually don't want to be
away from the boy, Dad.
1956
01:25:18,319 --> 01:25:19,960
I don't want to be
away from Jesse.
1957
01:25:20,000 --> 01:25:21,399
I know you've got Jesse.
1958
01:25:21,520 --> 01:25:22,920
Of course I know
you've got Jesse.
1959
01:25:23,000 --> 01:25:24,800
And you've got a great relationship with
him too.
1960
01:25:24,880 --> 01:25:26,239
But do you think when he's 16
1961
01:25:26,319 --> 01:25:29,039
he'll want you to be driving him
to school in the crap cart?
1962
01:25:29,119 --> 01:25:31,880
You're gonna do
your same old caper, are you?
1963
01:25:31,960 --> 01:25:34,840
Take a backward step and let everyone
stand all over you?
1964
01:25:34,920 --> 01:25:37,039
I just need a bit of time
to think about it.
1965
01:25:37,119 --> 01:25:39,439
Glenn doesn't want an answer
for a few days yet.
1966
01:25:39,560 --> 01:25:41,760
So I've just gotta get
through the Melbourne Cup,
1967
01:25:41,840 --> 01:25:43,199
and once I've survived that...
1968
01:25:43,279 --> 01:25:44,880
Survive the Melbourne Cup.
1969
01:25:44,960 --> 01:25:47,159
The Melbourne Cup's
been survived for 200 years.
1970
01:25:47,239 --> 01:25:50,000
But, anyway,
you run your own race.
1971
01:25:50,079 --> 01:25:51,800
Just put that bloody light off,
will you?
1972
01:25:51,880 --> 01:25:53,720
I've gotta get a bit of sleep.
1973
01:25:54,760 --> 01:25:56,840
Goodnight, Dad.
- Goodnight, son.
1974
01:26:17,439 --> 01:26:19,800
( CAR HORN HONKS )
What's going on here?
1975
01:26:19,880 --> 01:26:21,279
Just hang on a sec.
1976
01:26:23,319 --> 01:26:24,760
G'day, mate.
- Hello.
1977
01:26:24,840 --> 01:26:26,439
You're up early. How are you?
- Good.
1978
01:26:26,560 --> 01:26:28,520
Didn't expect to see you.
1979
01:26:28,600 --> 01:26:31,279
Just go and sit up on the fork.
1980
01:26:31,359 --> 01:26:32,279
G'day.
1981
01:26:32,359 --> 01:26:34,000
What are you doing here?
- I'm a bit early.
1982
01:26:34,039 --> 01:26:37,560
A bit early? You're four days early. I
said Saturday.
1983
01:26:37,640 --> 01:26:39,399
This has been organised
for a month, Kenny.
1984
01:26:39,520 --> 01:26:41,119
Today is Melbourne Cup.
1985
01:26:41,199 --> 01:26:43,720
You can't leave him...you can't leave
him with me today.
1986
01:26:43,800 --> 01:26:45,159
I can't...
You wrote it down.
1987
01:26:45,239 --> 01:26:46,800
Didn't you write it down,
for God's sake?
1988
01:26:46,880 --> 01:26:48,680
I wrote down 'Saturday'.
- You wrote down 'Saturday'?
1989
01:26:48,760 --> 01:26:50,319
WOMAN: You're an arsehole, Kenny.
1990
01:26:50,399 --> 01:26:52,760
Oh, g'day, Julie. How's Bill?
1991
01:26:52,840 --> 01:26:55,000
None of your bloody business.
- Fair enough.
1992
01:26:55,039 --> 01:26:56,439
Kenny, you're having him.
1993
01:26:56,560 --> 01:26:58,279
This is unbelievable.
1994
01:26:58,359 --> 01:27:01,399
Wave goodbye
to your mother and Julie.
1995
01:27:01,520 --> 01:27:02,920
You right?
- Yeah.
1996
01:27:03,000 --> 01:27:04,359
Good to see you, mate.
1997
01:27:04,439 --> 01:27:05,960
I wasn't expecting
to see you today.
1998
01:27:09,840 --> 01:27:12,039
Well, as you know,
today is, without a doubt,
1999
01:27:12,119 --> 01:27:14,000
the busiest day
on our calendar.
2000
01:27:14,079 --> 01:27:17,760
And, unfortunately,
this year we're two men down.
2001
01:27:20,840 --> 01:27:23,159
So, we've got 116 units
here today,
2002
01:27:23,239 --> 01:27:26,680
and today there's gonna be
over 150-odd thousand people
2003
01:27:26,760 --> 01:27:28,119
crammed in here.
2004
01:27:28,199 --> 01:27:31,439
So, today, I'm gonna have to
ask for 273% out of youse.
2005
01:27:31,560 --> 01:27:32,960
But we're gonna get
flogged today.
2006
01:27:33,000 --> 01:27:34,399
We're gonna be busier than
2007
01:27:34,520 --> 01:27:36,159
a one-armed bricklayer
in Baghdad.
2008
01:27:36,239 --> 01:27:38,119
We're gonna have to
make sure we all put in.
2009
01:27:54,079 --> 01:27:56,079
There you go.
Now you're one of the team.
2010
01:27:58,319 --> 01:28:00,399
Two rolls, mate. Excellent.
2011
01:28:02,520 --> 01:28:03,920
They haven't given us
much room
2012
01:28:04,000 --> 01:28:05,039
to turn around, have they?
2013
01:28:05,119 --> 01:28:06,079
No.
2014
01:28:07,159 --> 01:28:09,960
You alright, Jess?
Thanks, mate.
2015
01:28:10,000 --> 01:28:11,399
Is he coming up there?
2016
01:28:11,520 --> 01:28:13,359
No, mate,
he's going out the back now.
2017
01:28:13,439 --> 01:28:14,920
He's gotta do one more unit.
2018
01:28:25,640 --> 01:28:27,000
We'll call that one done, mate.
2019
01:28:27,079 --> 01:28:28,880
What do you say?
It looks alright, doesn't it?
2020
01:28:28,960 --> 01:28:30,319
If you grab that trolley...
2021
01:28:30,399 --> 01:28:34,000
Really and truly, have you got
this child here cleaning toilets?
2022
01:28:34,039 --> 01:28:36,039
Oh, no, he's not any kid.
That's my son.
2023
01:28:36,119 --> 01:28:38,079
YOUNG WOMAN: What's he doing
cleaning toilets?
2024
01:28:38,159 --> 01:28:40,560
This is no place
for a child to be around
2025
01:28:40,640 --> 01:28:43,079
the toilets
at a public racecourse.
2026
01:28:43,159 --> 01:28:45,159
It's a disgrace.
- I'm sorry you feel like that.
2027
01:28:45,239 --> 01:28:47,800
He should not have... What
sort of diseases could he get?
2028
01:28:47,880 --> 01:28:50,000
That's disgusting.
Sorry you feel that way.
2029
01:28:50,079 --> 01:28:51,800
You should be ashamed
of yourself.
2030
01:28:51,880 --> 01:28:53,880
You right, mate?
Grab it from the handle, mate.
2031
01:28:58,600 --> 01:29:00,119
But I want to stay with you.
2032
01:29:00,199 --> 01:29:02,359
I know that, mate.
I'd love to have you with me.
2033
01:29:02,439 --> 01:29:04,520
But we might get
a few less complaints that way.
2034
01:29:04,600 --> 01:29:06,000
I might just get you...
2035
01:29:06,039 --> 01:29:08,359
Look, you'll be right here.
Look, prop yourself up here.
2036
01:29:08,439 --> 01:29:10,359
Here's... Open these up.
2037
01:29:10,439 --> 01:29:12,960
And, I don't know, make a little
poo ticket castle or something.
2038
01:29:13,000 --> 01:29:15,359
Hayley will give you a pen or something
to draw with, right?
2039
01:29:15,439 --> 01:29:17,439
I won't be long, mate.
I won't be a tick.
2040
01:29:17,560 --> 01:29:20,039
( MOBILE PHONE RINGS )
2041
01:29:21,760 --> 01:29:23,239
Hello?
2042
01:29:23,319 --> 01:29:25,119
Oh, g'day, Dad. What's wrong?
2043
01:29:25,199 --> 01:29:27,000
Well, you don't have
to worry about what it's...
2044
01:29:27,039 --> 01:29:28,079
It's not gonna feel
like anything.
2045
01:29:28,159 --> 01:29:29,079
You're gonna be asleep.
2046
01:29:29,159 --> 01:29:31,159
I've told you a hundred times, it's a
simple op.
2047
01:29:31,239 --> 01:29:33,399
What, do you reckon they get you to
handle the instruments?
2048
01:29:33,520 --> 01:29:34,920
You're asleep during
the whole thing, Dad.
2049
01:29:35,000 --> 01:29:36,359
What's wrong?
2050
01:29:36,439 --> 01:29:39,960
Well, we've got a ruptured hose
at the back of this unit...
2051
01:29:40,000 --> 01:29:40,960
Yeah.
2052
01:29:41,000 --> 01:29:42,800
..and a lot of piss
coming out of it.
2053
01:29:42,880 --> 01:29:44,560
We've got people
walking through it.
2054
01:29:44,640 --> 01:29:47,720
Well, just cut the hose beside it
so that water's coming out.
2055
01:29:47,800 --> 01:29:49,359
People won't know
the difference.
2056
01:29:49,439 --> 01:29:50,880
But these are $100 shoes.
2057
01:29:50,960 --> 01:29:52,960
I nearly fell over and
I've ruined my shoes.
2058
01:29:53,000 --> 01:29:54,560
Well, they seem to be
alright now, love.
2059
01:29:54,640 --> 01:29:56,920
( WIND HOWLS, RAIN POURS )
2060
01:30:00,079 --> 01:30:01,560
This is not good.
2061
01:30:16,000 --> 01:30:17,439
Pump out the poo!
2062
01:30:28,760 --> 01:30:30,119
You're right, Thommo.
2063
01:30:30,199 --> 01:30:32,119
G'day, mate.
2064
01:30:32,199 --> 01:30:33,960
Where's Jesse?
2065
01:30:34,000 --> 01:30:35,680
HAYLEY: He went after you.
2066
01:30:35,760 --> 01:30:37,319
What do you mean
he went after me?
2067
01:30:37,399 --> 01:30:38,840
He said he knew
where you were.
2068
01:30:38,920 --> 01:30:40,279
He was going to meet you.
2069
01:30:40,359 --> 01:30:41,920
He's what?
- Gone to meet you for lunch.
2070
01:30:42,000 --> 01:30:43,680
He hasn't gone looking
for me out there?
2071
01:30:43,760 --> 01:30:45,119
Yeah, he went to meet you.
2072
01:30:45,199 --> 01:30:48,680
Hayley, there's 120,000 people.
He was supposed to stay here.
2073
01:30:48,760 --> 01:30:51,439
Um... Oh, Jesus!
2074
01:30:51,560 --> 01:30:53,439
Oh, Jesus Christ!
2075
01:30:57,560 --> 01:30:59,920
Yes... Oh...
2076
01:31:00,000 --> 01:31:01,800
Dad, I haven't got time...
2077
01:31:01,880 --> 01:31:03,800
Of course they're gonna come and give
you a needle.
2078
01:31:03,880 --> 01:31:05,239
That's how they
put you to sleep.
2079
01:31:05,319 --> 01:31:06,920
Did you think
they were gonna read you
2080
01:31:07,000 --> 01:31:07,920
a bloody bedtime story?
2081
01:31:08,000 --> 01:31:09,520
Will you shut up
and listen to me?
2082
01:31:09,600 --> 01:31:12,199
I have to go. I've lost the
little boy. No, I'll explain later.
2083
01:31:14,439 --> 01:31:16,239
He can't be down there.
2084
01:31:16,319 --> 01:31:17,239
This is madness.
2085
01:31:17,319 --> 01:31:19,520
I don't know how I'm gonna find him in
all this.
2086
01:31:19,600 --> 01:31:21,520
I mean, look at it.
And this joint is enormous.
2087
01:31:21,600 --> 01:31:24,920
And I don't know... There's a...
2088
01:31:32,159 --> 01:31:34,840
He can't have gone in there.
He hasn't got a...
2089
01:31:34,920 --> 01:31:37,600
Well, I hope he hasn't gone
in there. He hasn't got a pass.
2090
01:31:40,960 --> 01:31:43,319
( THUD! )
Oh, Jesus Christ!
2091
01:31:43,399 --> 01:31:45,279
Jeez, mate, are you alright?
- He's right. Get up.
2092
01:31:45,359 --> 01:31:47,880
Mate, are you alright?
- Yeah, he's alright. Don't worry.
2093
01:31:47,960 --> 01:31:48,960
He's alright?
- Yeah.
2094
01:31:49,000 --> 01:31:50,399
Are you sure he's alright?
- Get up.
2095
01:31:50,520 --> 01:31:52,520
You're embarrassing me.
Them girls will be here shortly.
2096
01:31:55,560 --> 01:31:56,520
Oh...
2097
01:31:59,960 --> 01:32:02,119
You haven't seen a kid,
have you? A small boy?
2098
01:32:02,199 --> 01:32:04,720
Haven't seen a little boy,
have you? A little kid? No?
2099
01:32:04,800 --> 01:32:09,079
Excuse me. Sorry.
Excuse me. Oh, God.
2100
01:32:12,640 --> 01:32:14,399
Oh, there he is.
There he is, there.
2101
01:32:14,520 --> 01:32:16,520
Where was he?
Where did you find him?
2102
01:32:16,600 --> 01:32:18,119
The boys found him
down near the toilets.
2103
01:32:18,199 --> 01:32:20,239
Oh, you were down at the toilet?
You're a smart boy.
2104
01:32:20,319 --> 01:32:21,760
I didn't even think
of looking there.
2105
01:32:21,840 --> 01:32:22,760
I should've known, shouldn't I?
2106
01:32:22,840 --> 01:32:25,000
I've got you back
and I won't lose you again, eh?
2107
01:32:25,039 --> 01:32:26,520
JESSE: Mmm.
2108
01:32:27,600 --> 01:32:29,760
I was worried, mate, eh?
2109
01:32:37,239 --> 01:32:39,960
( LAUGHTER )
2110
01:32:47,319 --> 01:32:49,239
Stay asleep. You're right.
2111
01:32:54,319 --> 01:32:56,960
( WOMEN TALK
INDISTINCTLY )
2112
01:33:01,239 --> 01:33:02,840
WOMAN: Oh, my God.
2113
01:33:02,920 --> 01:33:04,720
Oh...
2114
01:33:06,319 --> 01:33:07,760
(Woman cheers)
2115
01:33:07,840 --> 01:33:10,880
It's open! Come on! Come on!
2116
01:33:13,600 --> 01:33:16,560
You know, when people look
embarrassed or ashamed
2117
01:33:16,640 --> 01:33:18,000
at what I do,
2118
01:33:18,079 --> 01:33:19,920
I don't try
and convince them otherwise.
2119
01:33:20,000 --> 01:33:22,000
I don't try and beautify
the job that I do
2120
01:33:22,039 --> 01:33:23,439
or make it sound better.
2121
01:33:23,560 --> 01:33:25,760
I mean, if they've got
a problem with what I do
2122
01:33:25,840 --> 01:33:27,199
then it's their problem.
2123
01:33:27,279 --> 01:33:28,840
They've got the problem,
not me.
2124
01:33:32,359 --> 01:33:33,880
I was drunk at a party once,
2125
01:33:33,960 --> 01:33:35,319
and I don't normally
snap at people,
2126
01:33:35,399 --> 01:33:38,359
but I had a woman say to me
when I told her what I did,
2127
01:33:38,439 --> 01:33:39,640
she said, "How disgusting!
2128
01:33:39,720 --> 01:33:41,079
"I don't want to hear
about that."
2129
01:33:41,159 --> 01:33:43,319
And I said, "Well, how about
you go out in protest
2130
01:33:43,399 --> 01:33:45,840
"and never have a crap again, lady, see
how long you last."
2131
01:33:45,920 --> 01:33:49,399
Hey, matey. Don't park.
I'm just about to pull out, mate.
2132
01:33:49,520 --> 01:33:51,520
You're not gonna
park here, are you?
2133
01:33:51,600 --> 01:33:53,319
I'll just be a minute.
2134
01:33:53,399 --> 01:33:54,920
Just gonna be a minute.
2135
01:33:55,000 --> 01:33:58,000
Well, he would've come out
of surgery about an hour ago.
2136
01:33:58,079 --> 01:34:01,239
Yes, Smyth. S-M-Y-T-H.
2137
01:34:06,560 --> 01:34:08,399
Dad? How are you?
2138
01:34:09,680 --> 01:34:11,840
Yeah, how you feeling?
2139
01:34:11,920 --> 01:34:14,680
I don't think I've ever thought
about doing another job.
2140
01:34:14,760 --> 01:34:16,199
Plumbing is all I've ever known.
2141
01:34:16,279 --> 01:34:20,079
You know, I'd love to have
flown an aeroplane,
2142
01:34:20,159 --> 01:34:23,000
I'd love to... I don't know,
write great music,
2143
01:34:23,039 --> 01:34:25,960
but I guess, they're
like everyone, they're dreams,
2144
01:34:26,000 --> 01:34:28,560
but I don't think I've ever been
envious of anyone else
2145
01:34:28,640 --> 01:34:31,119
'cause this is the life I've got.
2146
01:34:32,239 --> 01:34:34,640
Alright, well, I'll see you
in the morning, OK?
2147
01:34:34,720 --> 01:34:36,239
First thing.
2148
01:34:36,319 --> 01:34:38,960
Alright. I love you, Dad. Yep.
2149
01:34:39,000 --> 01:34:41,920
Yeah, I know. Alright, well,
I'll see you in the morning.
2150
01:34:42,000 --> 01:34:43,760
OK. 'Bye.
2151
01:34:46,680 --> 01:34:48,039
Hey, mate.
2152
01:34:48,119 --> 01:34:50,000
Do you want to
move your car now?
2153
01:34:50,079 --> 01:34:51,880
Yeah, mate, I said I'd move it.
It's alright.
2154
01:34:51,960 --> 01:34:54,079
Can we move it now?
- No, we can do it later.
2155
01:34:54,159 --> 01:34:55,720
I want to get going home, mate.
2156
01:34:55,800 --> 01:34:58,199
Relax. Alright? Relax.
2157
01:34:58,279 --> 01:35:00,439
I said I wouldn't be long, alright?
2158
01:35:00,560 --> 01:35:02,920
No, well, can you move it now?
2159
01:35:03,000 --> 01:35:04,720
No, don't worry about it. Alright?
2160
01:35:04,800 --> 01:35:06,159
It's alright. I told you.
2161
01:35:06,239 --> 01:35:10,439
I told you I'll be out, alright?
Relax, alright? No worries.
2162
01:35:10,560 --> 01:35:12,039
Let it go.
2163
01:35:12,119 --> 01:35:13,760
No, you're absolutely right.
2164
01:35:13,840 --> 01:35:17,079
Sorry, I've had a bit of
a bad day. You take your time.
2165
01:35:17,159 --> 01:35:19,239
No worries.
2166
01:35:20,520 --> 01:35:23,239
He's, uh... he's absolutely right.
2167
01:35:23,319 --> 01:35:26,920
Just, uh... relax and let it go.
2168
01:35:27,000 --> 01:35:28,760
Let it go.
2169
01:35:28,840 --> 01:35:31,560
(Cranks pump)
2170
01:35:31,640 --> 01:35:36,159
(Sings) # Australians all
let us ring Joyce
2171
01:35:36,239 --> 01:35:40,680
# For she is young and free... #
2172
01:35:48,640 --> 01:35:51,520
Oh... hello.
2173
01:35:53,119 --> 01:35:57,840
Relaxing and, uh... Ietting it go.
2174
01:36:06,279 --> 01:36:08,359
Yeah, no worries. Alright.
2175
01:36:08,439 --> 01:36:11,159
Shall we say 1,500 people?
2176
01:36:11,239 --> 01:36:13,319
Or 1,400? 1,500's fine, yeah.
2177
01:36:13,399 --> 01:36:15,640
And are you serving any food?
2178
01:36:15,720 --> 01:36:18,640
Is there any curries
or spicy foods or...?
2179
01:36:18,720 --> 01:36:20,079
Hey, mate, can you...
2180
01:36:20,159 --> 01:36:21,880
Can I call you back
in 15 minutes?
2181
01:36:21,960 --> 01:36:23,640
Yeah, that'd be great. Sorry.
2182
01:36:23,720 --> 01:36:25,359
Yeah, thanks.
Alright, mate. Thanks.
2183
01:36:29,079 --> 01:36:32,039
( 'TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS' PLAYS )
2184
01:37:43,880 --> 01:37:46,079
This is all the latest thing, this.
2185
01:37:46,159 --> 01:37:48,960
I've been told by a few mates
whether I've seen these things.
2186
01:37:49,000 --> 01:37:50,800
It's all computerised
and everything.
2187
01:37:50,880 --> 01:37:53,439
Abracadabra,
have a look at that!
2188
01:37:53,560 --> 01:37:55,319
This is... This is exciting.
2189
01:37:55,399 --> 01:37:56,840
I know this sounds a bit crazy,
2190
01:37:56,920 --> 01:37:58,279
but I've been looking
forward to this.
2191
01:37:58,359 --> 01:38:01,640
Have a look at this.
That's like a ride at the show.
2192
01:38:01,720 --> 01:38:04,760
You're kidding me.
Look at this.
2193
01:38:04,840 --> 01:38:07,720
All the poo tickets come out
like a fax machine.
2194
01:38:07,800 --> 01:38:09,079
Look at that.
Water. Hand-dryer.
2195
01:38:09,159 --> 01:38:10,520
That's all automated.
2196
01:38:10,600 --> 01:38:12,880
This is fant...
I've gotta have a go at this.
2197
01:38:12,960 --> 01:38:17,560
I'll, um... I'll shut the door
shut now, so I'll, uh...
2198
01:38:17,640 --> 01:38:19,920
( MELLOW MUSIC PLAYS )
Music! Gee, you're kidding me.
2199
01:38:20,000 --> 01:38:21,039
Space-age technology.
2200
01:38:21,119 --> 01:38:22,439
It's made its way
into everything.
2201
01:38:22,560 --> 01:38:24,399
Good luck, mate.
Yep.
2202
01:38:24,520 --> 01:38:26,039
Mention my name,
you'll get a good seat.
2203
01:38:26,119 --> 01:38:29,359
There you go.
That's the future, eh?
2204
01:38:32,119 --> 01:38:35,319
You know, I've often wondered
how different my life would be
2205
01:38:35,399 --> 01:38:37,319
if shit didn't stink.
2206
01:38:37,399 --> 01:38:39,760
You know, if it smelt nice
2207
01:38:39,840 --> 01:38:42,119
Iike flowers or potpourri,
you know?
2208
01:38:42,199 --> 01:38:44,000
You know, imagine,
then you'd be able to go
2209
01:38:44,079 --> 01:38:45,520
to someone's house
2210
01:38:45,600 --> 01:38:47,840
and say, "I'd like
to use your crapper."
2211
01:38:47,920 --> 01:38:50,600
And they'd be like,
"Oh, fantastic.
2212
01:38:50,680 --> 01:38:54,560
"Last time you were over here,
oooh, sensational!
2213
01:38:54,640 --> 01:38:57,840
"What was that smell, Ken?
Lavender?"
2214
01:38:57,920 --> 01:39:00,039
But it's... it's not gonna happen
2215
01:39:00,119 --> 01:39:02,039
'cause it doesn't
smell like lavender,
2216
01:39:02,119 --> 01:39:04,279
it smells like shit.
2217
01:39:04,359 --> 01:39:05,960
That's exactly
what it smells like.
2218
01:39:06,000 --> 01:39:10,000
And I have a feeling it's always
gonna smell like that.
171595
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