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1
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,320
Dick, you'll never guess
what happened.
2
00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:59,558
You were, uh, followed home
by two middle-aged men.
3
00:01:01,695 --> 00:01:03,195
Wow, he's good.
4
00:01:06,133 --> 00:01:07,432
You know Mrs. Burgess,
5
00:01:07,468 --> 00:01:09,601
the woman who gives
the historical presentation
6
00:01:09,636 --> 00:01:11,303
to tour groups
at the museum?
7
00:01:11,338 --> 00:01:11,903
Yeah.
8
00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:13,572
She's retiring,
9
00:01:13,607 --> 00:01:15,707
and I've been asked
to replace her.
10
00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:17,909
We came by to see
your reaction.
11
00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:22,880
Con-congratulations.
12
00:01:24,384 --> 00:01:25,883
What a let-down.
13
00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:30,489
Guess we should leave
so Dick can calm down.
14
00:01:34,694 --> 00:01:35,360
Honey,
15
00:01:37,063 --> 00:01:39,631
this is a copy
of the presentation.
16
00:01:39,666 --> 00:01:42,767
Mrs. Burgess has been giving it
every week for 50 years.
17
00:01:44,471 --> 00:01:45,970
The problem is that this speech
18
00:01:46,006 --> 00:01:48,806
is just full of things
only she would say.
19
00:01:48,842 --> 00:01:51,776
Yeah, it does kinda reek of
Mrs. Burgess.
20
00:01:51,811 --> 00:01:56,414
See, what I need is a way to
make this speech more me.
21
00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:58,116
-Good idea.
-So you'll write it?
22
00:02:00,154 --> 00:02:01,453
-What?
-Oh, come on, Dick.
23
00:02:01,488 --> 00:02:02,354
If you do this for me,
24
00:02:02,389 --> 00:02:04,789
I'll do something
really great for you.
25
00:02:04,824 --> 00:02:06,525
Like-- like what?
26
00:02:07,727 --> 00:02:11,396
Like, uh, I'll give you back
those pictures
27
00:02:11,431 --> 00:02:13,998
that I took of you in that
Valentine's Day underwear.
28
00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,101
I'll get right on it.
29
00:02:19,439 --> 00:02:20,838
You're the greatest.
30
00:02:22,176 --> 00:02:23,341
Hoo hoo.
31
00:02:25,345 --> 00:02:26,444
Darn, a great reaction
32
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:27,579
and no one's here to see it.
33
00:02:37,357 --> 00:02:38,590
Hi. I'm Larry.
34
00:02:38,625 --> 00:02:39,724
This is my brother Darryl,
35
00:02:39,759 --> 00:02:41,426
and this is my other
brother Darryl.
36
00:02:42,563 --> 00:02:45,129
Only after tomorrow,
I'll be just Larry.
37
00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:47,832
Why-- why is that?
38
00:02:47,867 --> 00:02:49,201
I'm proud to announce
39
00:02:49,236 --> 00:02:51,570
that after many years
of pinchin' my pennies,
40
00:02:51,605 --> 00:02:53,672
I can now afford
to go on the road
41
00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:55,973
for my dream vacation:
Florida.
42
00:02:57,444 --> 00:02:58,610
For sun and fun?
43
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:01,012
No, miniature golf.
44
00:03:03,317 --> 00:03:05,317
It's the perfect time to go.
45
00:03:05,352 --> 00:03:06,284
It's the off season,
46
00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:07,819
and the box cars
ain't as full.
47
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,224
You might even be able
to swing a private car.
48
00:03:13,627 --> 00:03:15,660
Well, I'll be gone 8 or 9 days,
49
00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:18,396
depending on how many
free games I win.
50
00:03:18,432 --> 00:03:19,698
So while I'm gone,
51
00:03:19,733 --> 00:03:21,566
I need someone
to look after Darryl.
52
00:03:22,936 --> 00:03:25,337
Why-- why don't you
take 'em with you?
53
00:03:25,372 --> 00:03:28,540
Well, we were all plannin'
to go together.
54
00:03:28,575 --> 00:03:30,742
Whereas I was thrifty, though,
55
00:03:30,777 --> 00:03:32,977
they blew all their money
on ball bearings.
56
00:03:33,012 --> 00:03:33,678
[ Metallic jingling ]
57
00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:39,751
[ Clears throat ]
58
00:03:39,786 --> 00:03:40,918
Aren't-- aren't they
old enough to--
59
00:03:40,954 --> 00:03:42,153
to take care of themselves?
60
00:03:42,188 --> 00:03:43,722
I think so, but Darryl don't.
61
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:46,224
Frankly, if we--
62
00:03:47,261 --> 00:03:49,728
lived in a more rural area,
it might be okay.
63
00:03:52,031 --> 00:03:55,300
Anyway, you're my first choice
to stay with Darryl,
64
00:03:55,335 --> 00:03:57,235
although Miss Stephanie
won by the vote.
65
00:04:02,476 --> 00:04:05,610
Uh, guys, I-- I have a big
speech to rewrite and, uh,
66
00:04:05,646 --> 00:04:07,445
I-- I really don't think
I could give 'em any...
67
00:04:09,283 --> 00:04:10,282
quality time.
68
00:04:13,353 --> 00:04:14,118
Thank you, George.
69
00:04:15,221 --> 00:04:17,855
I don't know how you manage
to keep a cool head
70
00:04:17,891 --> 00:04:19,491
during such a crisis.
71
00:04:19,526 --> 00:04:20,725
No problem.
72
00:04:25,565 --> 00:04:26,631
Hi, Miss Stephanie.
73
00:04:27,334 --> 00:04:28,333
Hi, guys.
74
00:04:28,368 --> 00:04:29,934
Miss Stephanie,
I hate to impose,
75
00:04:29,969 --> 00:04:32,370
but I'm gonna be goin' away,
and I need someone
76
00:04:32,406 --> 00:04:33,605
to look after Darryl.
77
00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:36,441
Oh, well then, I suggest
you ask anyone but me.
78
00:04:38,244 --> 00:04:39,311
Thank you, Miss Stephanie.
79
00:04:39,346 --> 00:04:40,312
Glad I could help.
80
00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:45,617
Uh, Larry, I'd be glad
to stay with Darryl.
81
00:04:45,652 --> 00:04:46,318
Really?
82
00:04:47,153 --> 00:04:48,019
What do you think?
83
00:04:50,089 --> 00:04:52,089
Well, it's all right
with Darryl,
84
00:04:53,727 --> 00:04:55,694
but before I go blindly
85
00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:58,296
handing over the reins
of authority,
86
00:04:58,332 --> 00:05:00,231
I'd like to be sure
in my own mind
87
00:05:00,266 --> 00:05:01,733
that you're the right man
for the job.
88
00:05:02,736 --> 00:05:03,535
Okay.
89
00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:06,338
Hypothetically speaking,
90
00:05:06,373 --> 00:05:08,473
what would you do
if Darryl catches on fire?
91
00:05:12,379 --> 00:05:14,446
I'd throw water on him.
92
00:05:16,049 --> 00:05:18,550
The proper answer is
put him under a cow
93
00:05:18,585 --> 00:05:19,917
and start milkin' like crazy.
94
00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:26,090
Although your answer sounds like
it does have a shot.
95
00:05:28,294 --> 00:05:29,160
Okay.
96
00:05:29,195 --> 00:05:30,762
You're hired.
Here you go.
97
00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:34,733
Don't lose 'em.
98
00:05:52,085 --> 00:05:52,784
Dick,
99
00:05:54,153 --> 00:05:56,921
I just finished reading
what you did to the speech.
100
00:06:01,961 --> 00:06:02,927
You're welcome.
101
00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:06,698
Well, I-- I know you're
a bit sensitive
102
00:06:06,733 --> 00:06:08,099
about your writing,
103
00:06:08,134 --> 00:06:09,868
but I had
a little problem with--
104
00:06:09,903 --> 00:06:11,035
Hon--
Honey, say no more.
105
00:06:11,070 --> 00:06:12,169
I-- I know there's a--
106
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:14,038
there's a typo on page 3.
107
00:06:15,341 --> 00:06:18,109
Oh. I-- I-- I
didn't notice that.
108
00:06:20,847 --> 00:06:22,480
Well, then-- then, what are you
having a problem with?
109
00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:23,948
Well, uh,
110
00:06:24,885 --> 00:06:26,785
it's kind of around, uh,
111
00:06:28,288 --> 00:06:30,288
in this area.
112
00:06:31,491 --> 00:06:32,256
Kind of...
113
00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:34,793
just the first three pages.
114
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:38,863
The speech is three pages.
115
00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:39,964
That's my problem.
116
00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:42,667
-The length?
-The speech.
117
00:06:45,371 --> 00:06:47,472
Oh, I see what's going on here.
118
00:06:47,507 --> 00:06:48,873
You're, uh--
you're getting nervous
119
00:06:48,909 --> 00:06:50,742
about speaking in front
of a-- a crowd
120
00:06:50,777 --> 00:06:53,645
and you're taking it out on a--
on a great piece of writing.
121
00:06:56,149 --> 00:06:57,782
So you really think
these little...
122
00:06:57,818 --> 00:06:59,651
witticism things are good?
123
00:06:59,686 --> 00:07:01,018
Trust me. Screams.
124
00:07:03,022 --> 00:07:03,788
Well--
125
00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:05,757
Remember,
I did do this as a favor.
126
00:07:05,792 --> 00:07:07,525
I could be watching the Darryls.
127
00:07:12,065 --> 00:07:13,965
Okay. I'll-- I'll do it.
128
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,534
Great. Well,
if you'll excuse me,
129
00:07:16,570 --> 00:07:18,736
I have a typo to white out.
130
00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:19,437
[ Clears throat ]
131
00:07:22,275 --> 00:07:23,441
[ Chuckles ]
132
00:07:24,644 --> 00:07:27,311
Hi ho, JoJo,
how's it go go?
133
00:07:27,347 --> 00:07:28,112
[ Chuckles ]
134
00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:31,115
Hi, Michael, Stephanie, listen,
135
00:07:31,150 --> 00:07:32,717
how would you like
to do me a favor?
136
00:07:32,752 --> 00:07:33,985
Well, I think I speak
for us both
137
00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:36,387
when I enthusiastically say,
it depends.
138
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:40,024
I'm giving a speech
at the museum on Saturday,
139
00:07:40,059 --> 00:07:41,292
and I'd really appreciate
140
00:07:41,327 --> 00:07:43,194
a few familiar faces
in the audience.
141
00:07:43,229 --> 00:07:44,529
Freeze frame on that thought,
Joanna.
142
00:07:44,564 --> 00:07:45,997
What do we think, cake o' cups?
143
00:07:48,167 --> 00:07:50,001
-It's at the museum?
-Yeah.
144
00:07:50,737 --> 00:07:51,836
Correct me if I'm wrong,
145
00:07:51,872 --> 00:07:53,771
but isn't that where they keep
old and rusty things
146
00:07:53,807 --> 00:07:56,040
that were quaint 100 years ago,
but now are just gross?
147
00:07:57,611 --> 00:07:59,377
It would only be
for half an hour.
148
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:03,581
[ Sighs ]
Well, all right,
149
00:08:03,617 --> 00:08:05,049
if you're gonna carry on
like this.
150
00:08:07,420 --> 00:08:08,887
What good friends.
151
00:08:12,692 --> 00:08:13,958
Hi, George, how's it goin'?
152
00:08:14,628 --> 00:08:15,159
More.
153
00:08:15,996 --> 00:08:18,062
After a whole day
with the Darryls,
154
00:08:18,097 --> 00:08:20,464
the sound of a human voice
is like music.
155
00:08:21,701 --> 00:08:22,500
That's right, George,
156
00:08:22,536 --> 00:08:23,635
you've been
on double Darryl duty.
157
00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:24,702
Yeah.
158
00:08:24,738 --> 00:08:28,039
They spent the day emptying out
rain gutters.
159
00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:29,707
Aw, they must be tired.
160
00:08:29,743 --> 00:08:32,143
I don't know about tired,
but they're sure full.
161
00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:36,514
When's the tour group coming?
162
00:08:37,584 --> 00:08:40,585
Well, they've been off the bus
for half an hour,
163
00:08:40,620 --> 00:08:42,319
so they should be
at the display
164
00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:44,722
of Calvin Coolidge's
dental plate by now.
165
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:48,225
First one in the country
to hold five teeth.
166
00:08:49,963 --> 00:08:50,995
That's quite a coup.
167
00:08:54,233 --> 00:08:58,202
Oh, Michael,
I don't like this place.
168
00:08:58,237 --> 00:09:00,805
Everything's either old or dead
or was in someone's mouth.
169
00:09:02,576 --> 00:09:05,276
Michael, Stephanie, hi.
Thanks for coming.
170
00:09:05,311 --> 00:09:06,844
It was quite a sacrifice.
171
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:07,779
I mean, it's like
172
00:09:07,814 --> 00:09:10,048
being held captive
inside a PBS special.
173
00:09:11,651 --> 00:09:12,717
This way, everyone!
174
00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:16,520
Ew, Michael, bus people.
175
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:25,630
Joanna, I'd like you to meet
Kirby the bus driver.
176
00:09:25,665 --> 00:09:26,464
Hi.
177
00:09:26,499 --> 00:09:28,265
Well, you already got
Burgess beat
178
00:09:28,301 --> 00:09:29,300
in the bod department.
179
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:38,042
Hey, everyone. Isn't this fun?
180
00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:38,910
Huh?
181
00:09:38,945 --> 00:09:40,444
How 'bout that dental plate?
182
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:42,113
-Yeah!
-[ Applause ]
183
00:09:42,148 --> 00:09:43,648
All right, all right.
184
00:09:43,683 --> 00:09:46,784
Now I wanna present
the highlight of our tour,
185
00:09:46,820 --> 00:09:50,922
a colorful history of Vermont,
given by Joanna Loudon.
186
00:09:50,957 --> 00:09:53,424
Uh-- Uh, sorry guys,
she's married.
187
00:09:53,459 --> 00:09:54,125
[ Laughing ]
188
00:09:59,332 --> 00:10:00,665
Welcome to Vermont.
189
00:10:01,567 --> 00:10:03,968
Early settlers worked
long and hard
190
00:10:04,004 --> 00:10:07,872
to forge a community here
against many hardships.
191
00:10:07,907 --> 00:10:10,441
These Yankees faced
harsh weather,
192
00:10:10,476 --> 00:10:11,408
famine,
193
00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:12,110
even Indians.
194
00:10:13,179 --> 00:10:15,880
Of course, the Yankees
beat the Indians, 12 to 8.
195
00:10:15,915 --> 00:10:17,815
[ Loud laugh ]
196
00:10:27,827 --> 00:10:29,127
But seriously,
197
00:10:32,065 --> 00:10:35,066
when discussing the early
history of our state,
198
00:10:35,101 --> 00:10:39,037
one man stands out,
namely Ethan Allen.
199
00:10:39,072 --> 00:10:40,905
He was best known
as the leader
200
00:10:40,940 --> 00:10:42,807
of the Green Mountain Boys,
201
00:10:42,842 --> 00:10:45,176
whose first album
easily went gold.
202
00:10:45,211 --> 00:10:50,247
[ Laughs, coughs ]
203
00:10:54,253 --> 00:10:56,253
No, no, please, really.
204
00:11:03,063 --> 00:11:05,529
Dick, what is your wife doing?
205
00:11:05,565 --> 00:11:08,499
She's bringing down
the tour group.
206
00:11:08,534 --> 00:11:11,368
Vermont was the first state
admitted to the union
207
00:11:11,404 --> 00:11:13,637
after the 13 colonies.
208
00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:15,740
For those of you
who don't remember,
209
00:11:15,775 --> 00:11:18,776
the 13 colonies were
Massachusetts,
210
00:11:18,812 --> 00:11:21,079
Rhode Island,
Pennsylvania,
211
00:11:21,114 --> 00:11:23,214
and in case Santa Claus
is here,
212
00:11:23,249 --> 00:11:25,917
"Yes, Santa Claus,
there is a Virginia."
213
00:11:25,952 --> 00:11:27,719
[ Groans ]
214
00:11:29,723 --> 00:11:30,688
Honey, let's sneak out
215
00:11:30,724 --> 00:11:32,090
and get another look
at those teeth.
216
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:45,436
Honey...
217
00:11:45,471 --> 00:11:46,137
[ Clears throat ]
218
00:11:47,273 --> 00:11:49,040
It wasn't that bad.
219
00:11:49,075 --> 00:11:50,842
Dick, do you realize
that because of you
220
00:11:50,877 --> 00:11:53,577
I can't ever show my face
in this town again?
221
00:11:53,613 --> 00:11:55,179
Sure you can.
They were all tourists.
222
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:02,386
Dick, they were all chanting,
"Burgess, Burgess."
223
00:12:02,421 --> 00:12:04,421
Well, sure, to-- toward the end.
224
00:12:05,391 --> 00:12:06,490
Well, if you'll excuse me,
225
00:12:06,525 --> 00:12:08,359
I'm gonna go listen
to my Ethan Allen
226
00:12:08,394 --> 00:12:09,927
and the Green Mountain Boys
album.
227
00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:11,629
[ Laughs ]
228
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:15,166
See, I mean, it is a funny area.
229
00:12:16,302 --> 00:12:19,237
O-- Okay. Okay, Joanna, okay.
Maybe--
230
00:12:19,272 --> 00:12:20,204
maybe I was wrong
231
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,373
to force you to--
to do the speech.
232
00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:26,844
And-- and to be honest,
maybe it was all my fault
233
00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:28,712
and, uh-- and I'm--
I'm sorry.
234
00:12:30,283 --> 00:12:33,550
Well, Dick, that-- that's
big of you to admit it.
235
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,486
When I'm-- I'm wrong,
I'm-- I'm wrong.
236
00:12:35,521 --> 00:12:37,255
And I was wrong to...
237
00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:39,523
assume that you could
238
00:12:39,558 --> 00:12:40,825
deliver witty material.
239
00:12:43,062 --> 00:12:44,228
Excuse me?
240
00:12:44,964 --> 00:12:46,497
Well, face it, Joanna, I mean,
241
00:12:46,532 --> 00:12:49,400
some people can give
humorous speeches and--
242
00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:51,869
and other people are--
are like you.
243
00:12:55,175 --> 00:12:58,009
Dick, you're blaming me
for that yawn-a-thon?
244
00:12:59,478 --> 00:13:02,013
Well, it's unrealistic
to blame the material.
245
00:13:03,817 --> 00:13:05,716
Hi, Dick, Joanna.
246
00:13:05,751 --> 00:13:08,552
We just wanted to see if you
were okay after that bomb.
247
00:13:10,190 --> 00:13:11,222
I'm sorry.
248
00:13:11,257 --> 00:13:13,224
Oh, that's okay.
We don't blame you.
249
00:13:13,259 --> 00:13:14,859
No. It was that speech.
250
00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,863
If you were gonna rewrite
Mrs. Burgess's speech,
251
00:13:18,898 --> 00:13:21,165
you should at least
have gotten Dick to help you.
252
00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:22,399
He's a professional.
253
00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:24,468
Uh...
254
00:13:25,839 --> 00:13:29,240
a-- actually, I was the one who
rewrote the speech.
255
00:13:29,275 --> 00:13:29,807
Wow, Dick.
256
00:13:30,944 --> 00:13:32,776
Just 'cause you didn't get
picked to do the speech
257
00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:34,611
is no reason for sabotage.
258
00:13:35,849 --> 00:13:37,014
Tell you what, Joanna,
259
00:13:37,050 --> 00:13:38,950
why don't we just
forget all this,
260
00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:42,220
and you can come next week
and do Mrs. Burgess's speech.
261
00:13:42,255 --> 00:13:43,687
Yeah, we better tell
the security guard
262
00:13:43,723 --> 00:13:44,956
she's allowed back in.
263
00:13:48,728 --> 00:13:52,096
I don't know if I'm
delivering this right,
264
00:13:52,131 --> 00:13:53,965
[ Clears throat ]
but I told you so.
265
00:13:54,868 --> 00:13:56,033
No offense, Joanna,
266
00:13:56,069 --> 00:13:59,103
but I don't exactly live or die
by a thumbs-up from them.
267
00:14:00,806 --> 00:14:03,174
I mean, I still think the--
the right person
268
00:14:03,209 --> 00:14:05,109
could make that material fly.
269
00:14:05,144 --> 00:14:05,809
Like who?
270
00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:07,078
Uh...
271
00:14:07,914 --> 00:14:10,748
of the people in this room?
Uh...
272
00:14:10,783 --> 00:14:11,282
well, me.
273
00:14:12,252 --> 00:14:13,951
Good, then you give the speech
next week,
274
00:14:13,987 --> 00:14:15,186
and we'll see how you do.
275
00:14:15,221 --> 00:14:17,421
Oh, no, no. That-- that--
that wouldn't be fair.
276
00:14:17,456 --> 00:14:19,257
I'm a professional TV host.
277
00:14:20,126 --> 00:14:22,226
And I-- I'm not going to
get involved
278
00:14:22,262 --> 00:14:25,363
in some kind of a childish,
petty, competitive--
279
00:14:25,398 --> 00:14:26,630
-You're scared.
-You're on.
280
00:14:35,108 --> 00:14:37,108
Hi. I'm George.
281
00:14:46,085 --> 00:14:47,818
This is Larry's brother Darryl,
282
00:14:49,155 --> 00:14:51,488
and this is his other
brother Darryl.
283
00:14:53,592 --> 00:14:55,993
How are you and the Darryls
getting along, George?
284
00:14:56,029 --> 00:14:56,727
Oh, great.
285
00:14:56,762 --> 00:14:58,562
It's been a lot of fun.
286
00:14:58,597 --> 00:15:00,697
I'm doing things
I've never done before.
287
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:02,133
Like today we played
288
00:15:02,168 --> 00:15:04,668
Find the Hibernating Animal
and Wake It.
289
00:15:07,473 --> 00:15:09,640
Yeah, I'm learning a lot too.
290
00:15:09,675 --> 00:15:11,708
I never knew before
how many things
291
00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:14,078
a person could eat
and still not die.
292
00:15:16,615 --> 00:15:17,681
Come on, Darryl.
293
00:15:17,716 --> 00:15:19,550
-Let's add food to that list.
-Oh.
294
00:15:25,724 --> 00:15:26,090
Hi.
295
00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:29,193
I'm Larry.
Miniature golfed out.
296
00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:33,097
Hi, Larry.
How was your vacation?
297
00:15:33,132 --> 00:15:35,566
Well, I managed
to have a good time,
298
00:15:35,601 --> 00:15:37,734
although I was asked
to leave several courses
299
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:38,769
for usin' a wood.
300
00:15:41,874 --> 00:15:45,109
But I did leave
Florida in style. Police escort.
301
00:15:46,912 --> 00:15:47,778
Come on, guys.
302
00:15:47,813 --> 00:15:49,447
We can go down
to the lake and--
303
00:15:49,482 --> 00:15:51,415
Oh. Oh, hi.
Hi, Larry.
304
00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:52,316
Darryl.
305
00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:55,619
Let's see,
306
00:15:56,555 --> 00:15:59,090
uh, one, two.
307
00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:00,191
Yep, all here.
308
00:16:02,261 --> 00:16:03,461
You look a little bloated.
309
00:16:04,597 --> 00:16:05,596
You haven't let Darryl
310
00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:07,231
near the rain gutter,
have you?
311
00:16:10,503 --> 00:16:12,403
I have half a mind
not to give you
312
00:16:12,438 --> 00:16:14,071
the present I brought back
from Florida.
313
00:16:17,776 --> 00:16:19,243
Well, okay.
314
00:16:19,278 --> 00:16:21,979
I never could resist
those cherubic faces,
315
00:16:23,549 --> 00:16:25,582
so reminiscent
of the Campbell's kids.
316
00:16:29,022 --> 00:16:30,821
It's something
I put together myself,
317
00:16:30,856 --> 00:16:32,056
a skeeter farm.
318
00:16:34,193 --> 00:16:37,294
Now you can watch the
fascinating metamorphosis
319
00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:39,230
from larva to bloodsucker.
320
00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:42,833
You're a good brother, Larry.
321
00:16:43,669 --> 00:16:44,968
Oh, and thanks.
322
00:16:46,472 --> 00:16:47,138
Come on, Darryl.
323
00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:48,072
Let's go play
324
00:16:48,107 --> 00:16:50,141
Find the Hibernatin' Animal
and Wake It.
325
00:16:53,479 --> 00:16:53,644
Oh.
326
00:16:54,547 --> 00:16:56,347
And doing it a second time
in one day
327
00:16:56,382 --> 00:16:57,814
would border on the cruel.
328
00:17:00,553 --> 00:17:03,054
I know, let's go build
a giant nest
329
00:17:03,089 --> 00:17:04,555
and see what crawls into it.
330
00:17:07,427 --> 00:17:08,625
See you guys.
331
00:17:08,661 --> 00:17:09,326
See you la...
332
00:17:11,097 --> 00:17:12,029
I'll see you...
333
00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:17,535
Boy, you stay with 'em,
334
00:17:17,570 --> 00:17:18,869
spend time with 'em,
335
00:17:18,904 --> 00:17:21,238
do fun things with 'em,
and what do you get?
336
00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:26,143
They leave without saying
so much as a simple good-bye.
337
00:17:27,780 --> 00:17:29,346
Go have kids.
338
00:17:33,686 --> 00:17:34,985
Honey, do you think
we should, uh,
339
00:17:35,020 --> 00:17:37,221
rearrange the chairs
so there's...
340
00:17:37,256 --> 00:17:39,056
more room
for rolling in the aisles?
341
00:17:42,195 --> 00:17:43,427
Good idea, Dick.
342
00:17:43,463 --> 00:17:46,530
Anything that could cut down
trampling during the mass exit.
343
00:17:48,101 --> 00:17:50,134
Hi, Dick, Joanna.
344
00:17:50,169 --> 00:17:51,735
Well, we're really
looking forward
345
00:17:51,770 --> 00:17:53,270
to hearing that old speech.
346
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,574
Dick's got something
to tell you fellas.
347
00:17:57,876 --> 00:18:00,611
Um, we're doing
last week's speech.
348
00:18:00,646 --> 00:18:02,079
Oh, no.
349
00:18:03,282 --> 00:18:04,014
[ Clears throat ]
350
00:18:04,049 --> 00:18:04,748
Relax, guys.
351
00:18:05,884 --> 00:18:06,683
I'm doing it.
352
00:18:08,020 --> 00:18:09,620
Oh, no.
353
00:18:11,491 --> 00:18:13,056
Welcome to Vermont.
354
00:18:14,327 --> 00:18:16,860
Early settlers worked
long and hard
355
00:18:16,895 --> 00:18:18,596
to forge a community here
against--
356
00:18:19,665 --> 00:18:20,897
against many hardships.
357
00:18:22,201 --> 00:18:24,868
These Yankees faced
harsh weather, famine,
358
00:18:24,903 --> 00:18:25,736
even Indians.
359
00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:29,540
Of course, the Yankees
beat the Indians, 12 to 8.
360
00:18:29,575 --> 00:18:31,742
[ Laughs ]
361
00:18:38,717 --> 00:18:39,517
[ Clears throat ]
362
00:18:40,853 --> 00:18:42,353
But, uh-- but seriously,
363
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:49,026
when, uh-- when discussing the--
the early history of our state,
364
00:18:49,061 --> 00:18:50,361
one man stands out,
365
00:18:51,930 --> 00:18:52,896
Ethan Allen.
366
00:18:54,467 --> 00:18:56,700
Of course, he was best known
as the...
367
00:18:56,735 --> 00:18:57,734
leader of the...
368
00:18:58,337 --> 00:18:59,870
Green Mountain Boys,
369
00:19:00,506 --> 00:19:01,272
[ Chuckles ]
370
00:19:03,742 --> 00:19:05,809
whose first album
easily went gold.
371
00:19:05,844 --> 00:19:07,678
[ Laughs ]
372
00:19:10,550 --> 00:19:11,915
[ Laughs ]
373
00:19:14,887 --> 00:19:18,355
Um, I didn't know that
they had records back then.
374
00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:22,626
They-- they-- they didn't.
375
00:19:24,397 --> 00:19:26,564
It was, um-- it was a joke.
376
00:19:28,867 --> 00:19:30,934
[ Clears throat ]
You know, it's just that
377
00:19:30,969 --> 00:19:32,903
the Green Mountain Boys,
378
00:19:33,506 --> 00:19:34,171
it sort of--
379
00:19:36,108 --> 00:19:39,410
it sort of sounds like a--
like a musical group.
380
00:19:41,113 --> 00:19:42,613
Isn't it unprofessional
381
00:19:42,648 --> 00:19:45,216
to explain your jokes
to your audience?
382
00:19:51,324 --> 00:19:52,423
I m-- I mean, I--
383
00:19:52,458 --> 00:19:55,158
I-- I ma-- I made a-- a--
a fool of myself.
384
00:20:03,068 --> 00:20:06,136
Honey, that-- that was
the worst speech on--
385
00:20:06,171 --> 00:20:10,274
on-- on the history of Vermont
in the history of-- of Vermont.
386
00:20:18,551 --> 00:20:20,784
I hope those people
weren't serious about
387
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:23,420
cutting off...
388
00:20:24,624 --> 00:20:25,723
all their own ears.
389
00:20:30,529 --> 00:20:32,329
Joanna, aren't-- aren't you
gonna comfort me?
390
00:20:33,599 --> 00:20:34,365
In a minute.
391
00:20:36,569 --> 00:20:38,135
First I want an apology.
392
00:20:38,804 --> 00:20:40,871
For-- for humiliating myself?
393
00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:43,073
Dick, you humiliated me.
394
00:20:43,108 --> 00:20:44,508
That was last week.
395
00:20:46,945 --> 00:20:49,513
I'm-- I'm talking about--
about fresh pain here.
396
00:20:50,683 --> 00:20:51,348
[ Sighs ]
397
00:20:51,917 --> 00:20:53,484
Okay, okay, Joanna.
398
00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:55,619
You were completely right and--
399
00:20:55,655 --> 00:20:56,987
and I was completely
wrong and--
400
00:20:57,022 --> 00:20:57,621
and I'll never--
401
00:20:57,990 --> 00:20:59,022
[ Sighs ]
402
00:20:59,057 --> 00:21:01,692
I'll never do anything like that
to-- to you again.
403
00:21:04,563 --> 00:21:06,062
Well, that covers everything,
doesn't it?
404
00:21:07,466 --> 00:21:10,467
Yes it does, honey.
And thank you.
405
00:21:10,503 --> 00:21:11,468
You're-- you're welcome.
406
00:21:12,838 --> 00:21:15,439
Now I'm-- I'm going to
say something...
407
00:21:15,474 --> 00:21:17,474
else negative about myself and--
408
00:21:18,611 --> 00:21:21,144
I expect you to--
to disagree with me...
409
00:21:23,282 --> 00:21:24,247
a-- a lot.
410
00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:31,154
I-- I am the worst writer in--
in this galaxy,
411
00:21:32,658 --> 00:21:35,426
and-- and-- and maybe the--
the two nearby.
412
00:21:36,729 --> 00:21:38,195
Dick, you are not.
413
00:21:40,265 --> 00:21:41,231
I said a lot.
414
00:21:44,203 --> 00:21:46,770
Dick, you're a wonderful writer.
415
00:21:46,806 --> 00:21:50,441
But even the best writers
write bad things occasionally.
416
00:21:50,476 --> 00:21:51,809
Only instead
of crumpling them up,
417
00:21:51,844 --> 00:21:52,943
you gave them to your wife.
418
00:21:56,281 --> 00:21:58,281
But-- but what--
what if everything I--
419
00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:00,050
everything I ever wrote
was bad?
420
00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:04,321
I mean, I-- I put humor in--
in my how to books.
421
00:22:06,291 --> 00:22:06,957
I mean,
422
00:22:08,527 --> 00:22:09,560
listen to that.
423
00:22:11,029 --> 00:22:12,963
I mean, people all over
the country are--
424
00:22:13,966 --> 00:22:16,567
are reading my books and--
and not laughing.
425
00:22:18,738 --> 00:22:20,371
Dick, you are very funny.
426
00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:25,108
I mean, even your book titles
are funny.
427
00:22:25,143 --> 00:22:26,410
Shelf Help?
428
00:22:29,448 --> 00:22:30,781
Well, you know, it was...
429
00:22:32,317 --> 00:22:34,117
pretty off the wall,
so to speak.
430
00:22:34,152 --> 00:22:35,352
[ Laughing ]
431
00:22:38,824 --> 00:22:39,857
You see?
432
00:22:40,826 --> 00:22:41,525
You're right,
433
00:22:42,561 --> 00:22:43,960
my book titles were funny
434
00:22:44,963 --> 00:22:46,930
and the-- and the jokes in 'em
were funny.
435
00:22:46,965 --> 00:22:47,765
Exactly.
436
00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:51,468
I-- I am one heck
...of a funny guy.
437
00:22:53,272 --> 00:22:54,371
You sure are.
438
00:23:00,579 --> 00:23:01,445
[ Sighs ]
439
00:23:02,214 --> 00:23:03,847
JOANNA: Good night, honey.
440
00:23:03,883 --> 00:23:05,015
DICK: Good night.
441
00:23:06,552 --> 00:23:07,217
[ Sighs ]
442
00:23:09,254 --> 00:23:11,889
Maybe I-- Maybe I just had
a bad audience.
443
00:23:14,092 --> 00:23:15,492
-[ Sound of a slap ]
-Ah!
444
00:23:55,300 --> 00:23:56,066
Meow.
39177
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