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NARRATOR: Once upon a time,there was a labor shortage.
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It became so bad that employees wouldhire anybody...
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(BELL DINGING)
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... or anything.
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Yes, sir!
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Take this gentleman to suite 666.
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Yes, siree, sir!
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Just one more thing.
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I'm a tired man.
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I gotta have my sleep, plenty of it.
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So see to it that I get
lots of peace and quiet.
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Because if I'm disturbed at any time,
I'm gonna bust you right in the nose!
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Likeable chap, isn't he?
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May I go to my room now?
I'd like a little rest.
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Yes, sir, if it's peace and quiet
you're looking for,
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then, brother, you've hit the jackpot
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because if there's anything
we've got plenty of,
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it's good old peace and quiet.
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Right this way, sir.
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As I was saying, you couldn't have chosen
a better spot for peace and quiet.
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Yes, sir, brother, this is your lucky day.
Take...
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"And another thing, Sam,"
I said, "did it ever occur to you
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"how much peace and quiet
we've got around here?
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"Did you ever notice how we're just
slopping over with peace and quiet?"
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(LISPING) And here we are, suite 666.
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Let's see now,
the key to the grand ballroom.
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The key to the broom, mop,
and slop closet.
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Uh, the key to the solarium,
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uh, the June, moon, swoon room.
The snack bar and, uh...
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(WHISTLES)
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Ah, here it is!
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Just drop them any old where.
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Here you are, my lad.
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Thank you.
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(EXCLAIMS)
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What a ridiculous bonnet.
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Never come back in style, never!
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Bed!
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(SNORING)
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Poor fella, sure is sleepy.
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(SNORING)
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Hmm, little stuffy in here.
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Better let in a little fresh air.
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(TRAFFIC CLATTERING)
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DRUNK: (SINGING) Nobody knows
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(DRUNK HICCUPS)
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How dry I am
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(DRUNK HICCUPS)
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Nobody knows
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(DRUNK HICCUPS)
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How dry I am
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Don't stir yourself, sir,
I'll muffle that inebriated canary.
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Nobody knows...
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(CORK POPPING)
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(GARGLING)
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DAFFY AND DRUNK: Nobody knows
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How dry I am
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How dry I am
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(BOTH HICCUPPING)
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(DAFFY GUFFAWING)
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(BELL DINGING)
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(SINGING) Time waits for no oneIt passes you by
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Time waits for no onePasses you by
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Speck.
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(HIGH-PITCHED SQUEAKING)
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(PHONE RINGING)
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(DAFFY LAUGHING)
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DAFFY: Oh, brother, what a story!
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Funniest story I heard in years.
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I never laughed so hard in all my life.
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(LAUGHING)
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Oh, that's too good to keep.
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Oh, what a lulu!
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What a lollapalooza.
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Hey, mister, wake up a minute.
I gotta tell you this one.
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(LAUGHING)
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Oh, it'll kill you.
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Well, it seems
there was a traveling salesman
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and he came to a farmhouse,
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and he asked the farmer...
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He asked the farmer...
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(LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)
And then... And then, here's the pay off.
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Oh, it'll kill you.
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When the farmer says, "Do you expect
to come back this way next year?"
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the salesman said... The salesman says...
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The salesman answers, he says...
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Hey, what do you know,
I forgot what the salesman did say.
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Oh, but it was a riot.
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The funniest thing I ever heard!
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Shh!
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(TSKING)
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How do they expect the poor guy to sleep?
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Why, it's freezing in here.
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Hmm, on the fritz. I'll fix it in a jiffy.
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(CLANGING)
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(MUFFLED CLANG)
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(EX CLAIMS)
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(PIPE WHISTLING)
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(MUFFLED WHISTLING)
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So! A fine kettle of fish!
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Here I work myself down to the skin
and bones trying to keep this guy asleep,
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and what do you do? Blow whistles!
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Just when I got things so quiet
you can hear a pin drop,
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- you bust in here...
- Shh!
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...and bust out with a whistle
and you snafu the whole works.
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How in the name of all that's reasonable
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do you expect a guy to get his slumber
when a goof like you goes around
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- making noises...
- Shh!
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...like a one-man 4th of July celebration?
He needs peace and quiet!
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It's positively outrageous!
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(BELL DINGING)
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Yes, sir!
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For very meritorious service
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you are herewith promoted
to the position of manager.
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Take over.
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Noisy little character, isn't he?
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