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MAC:
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Hey, Dee! Dee! Dee! Dee!
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Do you want to take your feet
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off my bed, please?
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DEE: It's not your bed, okay?
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It's my goddamn floor!
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And how many times do
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I have to ask you guys
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to please just
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pick up your shit
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when you wake up
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in the morning?!
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You're turning this place
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into the Superdome.
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Superdome? That's, like,
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six years too late.
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That's a super lame
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reference.
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And it's kind of offensive.
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You'll be happy to know,
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by the way,
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we are looking
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for a place right now.
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All right? What about
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this place, man?
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Ah, it looks
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a little bit junky.
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It kind of reminds me of here.
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Yeah, this place
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is a piece of shit.
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It's not junky, okay?
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You guys have
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destroyed everything,
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and that's why it looks junkier,
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like a couple of locusts.
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Oh, I take that as a compliment.
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It's not a compliment.
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Well, it's biblical,
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so it's a compliment.
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Yeah.
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(stammers) Why is everything
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so goddamn expensive?
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I mean,
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I wish we hadn't burned down
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our rent-controlled apartment.
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(both laugh)
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Yeah, you think?
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Dee, I will slap you
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in the teeth.
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You think this is easy?
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We-we have a list
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of demands here.
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We need two bedrooms.
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We-we need two bathrooms,
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minimum.
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You know what? Whatever.
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What's your plan?
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Where are you guys gonna
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find a place that fits
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all of your needs for
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under 1,500 bucks a month?
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DENNIS:
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Well, guys,
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this is it.
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Welcome to our
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beautiful new home.
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CHARLIE: This is crazy.
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You guys should've just
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moved into that empty apartment
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in our building.
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The one where the family
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was murdered?
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Brutally murdered.
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Pass.
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This place is awesome.
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You guys are gonna thrive out
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here, and I am not gonna have
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to worry about you
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hogging my shower anymore.
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And we don't have to worry
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about getting ringworm.
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You brought the ringworm.
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Yeah, and now your apartment
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is infested with it.
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Yeah.
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Don't worry, you'll
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be back to giving
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each other worms
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soon enough.
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These are city scum.
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They can't hack it
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out here.
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Oh, yeah?
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Yeah.
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You want to bet?
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Absolutely.
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Okay, Frank.
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So if Mac and I
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can live here for a month,
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then you have to pay
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our rent for an entire year.
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Deal. And if you don't,
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you have to sleep in bed
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with an old man for a year.
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(laughing): Gross!
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What?
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Yeah.
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What the hell are you
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laughing about, Charlie?
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You already sleep
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with an old man,
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and for no reason other than
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you seem to enjoy it.
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(laughing)
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Yeah.
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Okay, you know what, Frank?
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You got a bet.
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Won't last a month--
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Frank is insane!
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This place is
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paradise, man.
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We can really
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stretch out, you know?
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It-it's quiet,
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it's calm.
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It's not like the city
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where everything is so
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stressful, you know?
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I'm-I'm just...
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I feel at ease.
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When was the last time
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that we had a home-cooked meal?
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Oh, dude...
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(stammers)
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it's been forever.
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Well, my friend, dig in.
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Mmm.
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Oh, my God.
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Mac...
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this is incredible.
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You like it?
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Oh, my God.
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Oh, that is such a relief
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because I worked so hard on it.
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Yeah.
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I call it Mac's
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famous mac and cheese.
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(both laughing)
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Okay, well,
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I don't know how...
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I don't really know
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how famous it is.
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I mean, I'm your roommate,
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and I've never heard of it.
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So, what do you want
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to do after dinner?
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Uh... well, see, the
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TV's not hooked up,
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so can't watch TV.
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Um, there's not really any
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bars around here, so...
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Right.
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You know what
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we should do?
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Hmm?
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Let's just get a
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good night's sleep.
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That's a good idea.
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Yeah.
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(faint chirp nearby)
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Yeah.
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What was that?
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What was what?
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(chirps again)
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You hear that,
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that chirping sound?
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I did not, no.
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Probably a smoke detector
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or something like that, huh?
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Right, yeah.
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No big deal.
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Hey, to a great night's sleep.
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(crickets trilling)
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(low hissing)
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(smoke detector chirping)
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(fan blades swooshing)
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(distant lawn mower humming)
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(grunts)
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Good morning.
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Mm.
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Hey, man, did you
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hear that...?
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Pool filter?
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Oh, my God.
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It was like a jet engine.
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I didn't get any sleep
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at all last night, you know?
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One noise is so much louder
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than all the city noises
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combined, you know?
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You just, you fixate.
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Totally.
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I get that, but I-I
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was actually talking
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about that chirping sound--
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did you hear that?
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It was, like,
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happening all night.
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No, I didn't hear that.
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Oh, man, it was
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driving me nuts.
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Yeah.
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Anyway, want to roll?
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I, uh, got us some music.
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I made this Creed mix.
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Oh, uh, Creed, huh?
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Yeah, it's a long
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commute, so...
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Yeah, I was thinking more,
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like, Bryan Adams.
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Okay.
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But it-it is Tuesday.
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Yeah...
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Which is technically
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my music day.
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Right.
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Yeah, and that was cool and all
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when it only took us,
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like, ten minutes to get to
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work, but now we're looking
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at, like, an hour
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or so commute.
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I'm thinking
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maybe more my thing.
235
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But, hey, you know what?
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Here's an idea.
237
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Why don't you take
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a personal day?
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You know, I mean, we got
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a lot of property here.
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It might be nice to have
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someone here to look after it.
243
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Yeah.
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You know, maybe get
245
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that TV working.
246
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:49,123
Maybe take a run at that,
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uh, pool filter?
248
00:04:49,165 --> 00:04:50,582
Oh.
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Huh?
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MAN: Hey!
251
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You must be the
252
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new neighbors.
253
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Name's Wally Schmidt.
254
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No relation to Mike.
255
00:04:54,879 --> 00:04:56,881
But don't tell my wife.
256
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(chuckles)
257
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Boy, it sure is a
258
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hot one today, huh?
259
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Okay.
260
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Nice to meet you boys.
261
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What the hell was
262
00:05:13,438 --> 00:05:14,565
that all about?
263
00:05:14,606 --> 00:05:16,358
Just comes up
264
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and starts talking to us?
265
00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:18,360
Right, some guy comes up to me,
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I don't know what he's...
267
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I don't know what he's up to.
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No. It's like, the whole time,
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I'm staring at him, I'm
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thinking, does he have a knife?
271
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Are we gonna have to take
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this bitch out right now?
273
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No. I don't know.
274
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I don't know.
275
00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:26,368
But it's-it's the city, though.
276
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It-it's forced me to develop
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these sharp edges.
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For protection, you know?
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I got to smooth them out.
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We're in the suburbs.
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Let's work on it a little bit.
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Okay, all right.
283
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Shall we? You know,
284
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'cause now I'm all tense.
285
00:05:34,043 --> 00:05:36,378
I don't want to bring
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this energy into work, you know?
287
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Luckily, I got
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the commute to relax.
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♪ Bought it
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at the five and dime... ♪
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(horn honking)
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Aw, merge, merge!
293
00:05:40,799 --> 00:05:43,302
You had your...
294
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:46,388
Come on, you got, you have to
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seize the goddamn gap!
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People are
297
00:05:46,430 --> 00:05:48,015
so goddamn inefficient!
298
00:05:48,057 --> 00:05:49,600
Oh, goddamn it!
299
00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:51,977
I don't care if you're old!
300
00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:51,977
Seize the gap!
301
00:05:52,019 --> 00:05:54,396
You old fat bitch!
302
00:05:54,438 --> 00:05:55,689
You fat bitch!
303
00:05:59,944 --> 00:06:02,196
MAC: So, how was your day?
304
00:05:59,944 --> 00:06:02,196
DENNIS: Good.
305
00:06:02,238 --> 00:06:03,864
How was work?
306
00:06:02,238 --> 00:06:03,864
Any-any good stories?
307
00:06:03,906 --> 00:06:06,408
Charlie and Frank are doing
308
00:06:03,906 --> 00:06:06,408
something with Russian hats now.
309
00:06:06,450 --> 00:06:08,410
Really? What?
310
00:06:06,450 --> 00:06:08,410
I don't know.
311
00:06:08,452 --> 00:06:11,038
I couldn't follow any of it.
312
00:06:08,452 --> 00:06:11,038
What did you do today?
313
00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:12,623
Did you, uh, fix
314
00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:12,623
that pool filter?
315
00:06:12,664 --> 00:06:14,416
Uh... I tried.
316
00:06:14,458 --> 00:06:16,418
But it turns out, it's
317
00:06:14,458 --> 00:06:16,418
actually really complicated,
318
00:06:16,460 --> 00:06:18,670
and I didn't go to school
319
00:06:16,460 --> 00:06:18,670
for that, you know?
320
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:20,881
Mostly I just tried to get
321
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:20,881
the living room set up.
322
00:06:25,469 --> 00:06:27,429
It took a little while
323
00:06:25,469 --> 00:06:27,429
to find a stud.
324
00:06:27,471 --> 00:06:29,098
Yeah, I can, I can see that.
325
00:06:29,140 --> 00:06:31,350
Maybe, uh, take another
326
00:06:29,140 --> 00:06:31,350
personal day tomorrow, huh?
327
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:33,477
You know, maybe I will take
328
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:33,477
another run at that pool filter.
329
00:06:33,518 --> 00:06:35,020
Maybe try and do
330
00:06:33,518 --> 00:06:35,020
all the other things
331
00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:36,521
that you tried to
332
00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:36,521
do today, but, uh,
333
00:06:36,563 --> 00:06:39,399
you know... do them.
334
00:06:41,110 --> 00:06:43,445
(low hissing)
335
00:06:43,487 --> 00:06:45,656
Shut up, shut up, shut up,
336
00:06:45,697 --> 00:06:47,366
shut up!
337
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:48,450
(chirping)
338
00:06:48,492 --> 00:06:51,245
Aw, damn it!
339
00:06:51,287 --> 00:06:52,537
What is that?
340
00:06:54,790 --> 00:06:57,751
♪ Played it till
341
00:06:54,790 --> 00:06:57,751
my fingers bled ♪
342
00:06:57,793 --> 00:06:59,753
♪ Was the summer of '69... ♪
343
00:06:59,795 --> 00:07:01,339
(car honks)
344
00:07:01,380 --> 00:07:02,506
What's your plan, huh?
345
00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:04,258
Two miles an hour. There you go.
346
00:07:04,300 --> 00:07:05,509
(horn honks)
347
00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:06,510
Oh, gun it.
348
00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:08,179
Use your signal, you cow!
349
00:07:08,220 --> 00:07:09,305
(tires screech)
350
00:07:09,347 --> 00:07:10,889
Goddamn it.
351
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:12,724
♪ Jody got married,
352
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:12,724
I should've known... ♪
353
00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:14,476
Unbelievable.
354
00:07:14,518 --> 00:07:17,271
I don't see what the problem is.
355
00:07:17,313 --> 00:07:18,522
(tires screeching)
356
00:07:17,313 --> 00:07:18,522
Hey. Hey, hey!
357
00:07:18,563 --> 00:07:20,524
Slow down!
358
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:23,361
Children play here, you fat cow!
359
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:25,487
Hey, Wally.
360
00:07:25,529 --> 00:07:27,656
Oh, hey.
361
00:07:25,529 --> 00:07:27,656
(chuckles)
362
00:07:27,698 --> 00:07:29,367
Hot one today, huh?
363
00:07:29,408 --> 00:07:31,202
Yeah?!
364
00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:34,788
(door opens)
365
00:07:34,830 --> 00:07:36,999
Oh, that Wally loves to say
366
00:07:34,830 --> 00:07:36,999
"It's a hot one"
367
00:07:37,041 --> 00:07:38,583
when I already know
368
00:07:37,041 --> 00:07:38,583
it's a hot one.
369
00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:40,544
'Cause I'm standing outside
370
00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:40,544
in the hot one.
371
00:07:40,585 --> 00:07:41,545
Thanks a lot, Wally.
372
00:07:41,586 --> 00:07:42,587
You know what?
373
00:07:42,629 --> 00:07:44,131
Tell me about future weather.
374
00:07:44,173 --> 00:07:45,966
Don't tell me
375
00:07:44,173 --> 00:07:45,966
about present weather...
376
00:07:47,343 --> 00:07:49,303
Oh, I didn't realize
377
00:07:47,343 --> 00:07:49,303
we had company.
378
00:07:49,345 --> 00:07:50,929
Hey, Dennis.
379
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:52,723
This is Jimmy--
380
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:52,723
he's the pool guy.
381
00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:54,516
I invited him
382
00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:54,516
over for dinner.
383
00:07:54,558 --> 00:07:57,519
Mac, can I speak to you
384
00:07:54,558 --> 00:07:57,519
in the foyer for a second?
385
00:07:57,561 --> 00:07:59,730
Oh, uh...
386
00:07:59,771 --> 00:08:01,232
Sure.
387
00:07:59,771 --> 00:08:01,232
(chuckles)
388
00:08:01,273 --> 00:08:02,524
Excuse us for a second.
389
00:08:02,566 --> 00:08:04,026
Just be a...
390
00:08:02,566 --> 00:08:04,026
just be a...
391
00:08:04,068 --> 00:08:05,361
just be a quick
392
00:08:04,068 --> 00:08:05,361
minute here.
393
00:08:05,403 --> 00:08:06,820
Hey. What?
394
00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:08,697
DENNIS: Come on, man.
395
00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:08,697
You gonna invite some guy
396
00:08:08,739 --> 00:08:10,449
over to my house
397
00:08:08,739 --> 00:08:10,449
that I don't even know.
398
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,368
MAC: I just wanted to have, uh,
399
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,368
somebody over for dinner.
400
00:08:12,410 --> 00:08:14,370
DENNIS: So I got to have dinner
401
00:08:12,410 --> 00:08:14,370
with some guy, "Hey, pool guy."
402
00:08:14,412 --> 00:08:15,787
MAC:
403
00:08:14,412 --> 00:08:15,787
His name is Jimmy!
404
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,539
DENNIS: Jimmy? I don't give
405
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,539
a (bleep) what you do.
406
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:19,541
MAC: You could ask him about
407
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:19,541
all sorts of things. I mean...
408
00:08:19,583 --> 00:08:20,792
DENNIS: What do you want me
409
00:08:19,583 --> 00:08:20,792
to ask pool guy?
410
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,794
If he knew shit
411
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,794
that I was interested in,
412
00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:24,463
he wouldn't be
413
00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:24,463
a (bleep) pool guy.
414
00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:29,343
I said I was sorry.
415
00:08:29,385 --> 00:08:32,596
Yeah, yeah. No, I'm
416
00:08:29,385 --> 00:08:32,596
just, uh... (chuckles)
417
00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:34,598
I'm just confused,
418
00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:34,598
you know, I...
419
00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:37,601
Here I am thinking that we
420
00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:37,601
got a pool that's outside.
421
00:08:37,642 --> 00:08:40,562
Eh... I didn't realize
422
00:08:37,642 --> 00:08:40,562
that we had an indoor pool.
423
00:08:40,604 --> 00:08:42,606
Can we just forget about it
424
00:08:40,604 --> 00:08:42,606
and eat our dinner?
425
00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:43,815
It's just so funny.
426
00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:46,360
We got enough money
427
00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:46,360
for two pools.
428
00:08:46,402 --> 00:08:48,612
And yet we don't have enough
429
00:08:46,402 --> 00:08:48,612
money for a recipe book,
430
00:08:48,653 --> 00:08:51,740
'cause here we are eating
431
00:08:48,653 --> 00:08:51,740
mac and cheese again.
432
00:08:51,782 --> 00:08:53,242
You don't know
433
00:08:51,782 --> 00:08:53,242
how hard it is
434
00:08:53,284 --> 00:08:55,244
to be cooped up in here
435
00:08:53,284 --> 00:08:55,244
all by myself, okay?
436
00:08:55,286 --> 00:08:56,578
(laughs)
437
00:08:56,620 --> 00:08:58,038
At least you get
438
00:08:56,620 --> 00:08:58,038
to go to work.
439
00:08:58,080 --> 00:08:59,581
I get to go to work?
440
00:08:58,080 --> 00:08:59,581
Yes.
441
00:08:59,623 --> 00:09:01,833
Oh, everybody, hey,
442
00:08:59,623 --> 00:09:01,833
I "get" to go to work.
443
00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,585
I "get" to have a job.
444
00:09:03,627 --> 00:09:06,505
I "get" to have to
445
00:09:03,627 --> 00:09:06,505
make money for us.
446
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,673
Oh, my... You know
447
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,673
what, screw this.
448
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:10,092
Wh... Oh, oh, yes.
449
00:09:10,134 --> 00:09:11,427
Fine, just walk away
450
00:09:10,134 --> 00:09:11,427
right in the middle...
451
00:09:11,469 --> 00:09:12,470
Dennis!
452
00:09:18,309 --> 00:09:21,061
(thudding)
453
00:09:21,103 --> 00:09:22,604
Goddamn it.
454
00:09:22,646 --> 00:09:23,814
What is that?
455
00:09:23,855 --> 00:09:25,441
(groans)
456
00:09:25,483 --> 00:09:26,608
Son of a bitch.
457
00:09:26,650 --> 00:09:27,609
What...?
458
00:09:27,651 --> 00:09:28,610
Son of a bitch.
459
00:09:28,652 --> 00:09:29,611
The hell you doing?
460
00:09:29,653 --> 00:09:30,612
Oh, do you hear it, too?
461
00:09:30,654 --> 00:09:32,114
I heard you bashing.
462
00:09:32,156 --> 00:09:33,532
Yeah, yeah,
463
00:09:32,156 --> 00:09:33,532
that chirping?
464
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:35,117
I'm pretty sure
465
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:35,117
it's a cricket.
466
00:09:35,159 --> 00:09:37,119
Okay, you know what, I'm
467
00:09:35,159 --> 00:09:37,119
gonna say something here,
468
00:09:37,161 --> 00:09:39,621
and it might not
469
00:09:37,161 --> 00:09:39,621
be popular, but...
470
00:09:39,663 --> 00:09:40,914
I hate this place.
471
00:09:39,663 --> 00:09:40,914
Yes.
472
00:09:40,956 --> 00:09:42,624
And I got to get
473
00:09:40,956 --> 00:09:42,624
back to the city.
474
00:09:42,666 --> 00:09:43,708
I'm going nuts.
475
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,627
I miss the city, too.
476
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,627
I miss the action.
477
00:09:45,669 --> 00:09:47,629
You know, I thought this
478
00:09:45,669 --> 00:09:47,629
place would soften my edges,
479
00:09:47,671 --> 00:09:48,797
but they're
480
00:09:47,671 --> 00:09:48,797
sharper than ever.
481
00:09:48,839 --> 00:09:50,799
Dude, I cannot
482
00:09:48,839 --> 00:09:50,799
be cooped up here.
483
00:09:50,841 --> 00:09:52,884
You know, cooking
484
00:09:50,841 --> 00:09:52,884
and cleaning and fixing.
485
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,678
All right, all right,
486
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,678
calm down, calm down.
487
00:09:54,719 --> 00:09:56,638
I... I think I
488
00:09:54,719 --> 00:09:56,638
have an idea.
489
00:09:56,680 --> 00:09:58,516
L-Let's... let's
490
00:09:56,680 --> 00:09:58,516
invite the gang over.
491
00:09:58,557 --> 00:09:59,891
You know, we'll
492
00:09:58,557 --> 00:09:59,891
clean up the place,
493
00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:01,643
we'll serve 'em
494
00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:01,643
a nice dinner,
495
00:10:01,685 --> 00:10:03,437
we'll show 'em how-how
496
00:10:01,685 --> 00:10:03,437
well we're doing,
497
00:10:03,479 --> 00:10:05,689
and I'll feel Frank out
498
00:10:03,479 --> 00:10:05,689
about this bet, you know,
499
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:08,484
which in retrospect is
500
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:08,484
completely ridiculous.
501
00:10:08,526 --> 00:10:09,860
How are they gonna
502
00:10:08,526 --> 00:10:09,860
find an old man
503
00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:11,362
that's gonna go
504
00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:11,362
along with it?
505
00:10:11,403 --> 00:10:12,654
Right. Exactly.
506
00:10:11,403 --> 00:10:12,654
(chuckles)
507
00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:14,532
(doorbell rings)
508
00:10:14,573 --> 00:10:17,326
Mac and Dennis, old man.
509
00:10:17,368 --> 00:10:19,953
Old man, Mac and Dennis.
510
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:28,045
DENNIS (sighs):
511
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:28,045
Ah...
512
00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:29,671
MAC: So, uh, what's
513
00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:29,671
with the hats?
514
00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:31,382
(Frank and Charlie laugh)
515
00:10:31,423 --> 00:10:33,175
I... You wouldn't
516
00:10:31,423 --> 00:10:33,175
get it. Uh-uh.
517
00:10:33,217 --> 00:10:35,677
Yeah, you kind of
518
00:10:33,217 --> 00:10:35,677
had to be there, man.
519
00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:37,137
Hey, how about
520
00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:37,137
that food, huh?
521
00:10:37,179 --> 00:10:39,681
Mac calls it "Mac's
522
00:10:37,179 --> 00:10:39,681
famous mac and cheese."
523
00:10:39,723 --> 00:10:41,058
And it is famous.
524
00:10:41,099 --> 00:10:42,684
In my stomach.
525
00:10:41,099 --> 00:10:42,684
(laughs)
526
00:10:42,726 --> 00:10:44,478
Is it? I mean, we're your
527
00:10:42,726 --> 00:10:44,478
friends, I've never heard of it.
528
00:10:44,520 --> 00:10:46,271
Hey, guys.
529
00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:48,273
We are having so much fun
530
00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:48,273
at this house.
531
00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:50,526
I'll tell you, I can't believe
532
00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:50,526
we ever lived anywhere else.
533
00:10:50,568 --> 00:10:52,777
But I was just curious,
534
00:10:50,568 --> 00:10:52,777
if we were to lose this bet,
535
00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:55,989
what would
536
00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:55,989
the logistics be, like,
537
00:10:56,031 --> 00:10:57,074
with the old man thing?
538
00:10:57,115 --> 00:10:58,367
FRANK:
539
00:10:57,115 --> 00:10:58,367
Oh.
540
00:10:58,409 --> 00:11:00,202
Well, I'll tell
541
00:10:58,409 --> 00:11:00,202
you what I'll do.
542
00:11:00,244 --> 00:11:02,204
If you guys are cracking,
543
00:11:00,244 --> 00:11:02,204
you can forfeit now,
544
00:11:02,246 --> 00:11:05,707
I'll buy the three of youse
545
00:11:02,246 --> 00:11:05,707
a California king-size bed
546
00:11:05,749 --> 00:11:07,585
to sleep in.
547
00:11:05,749 --> 00:11:07,585
DEE: What?
548
00:11:07,626 --> 00:11:09,711
No, they're not gonna forfeit--
549
00:11:07,626 --> 00:11:09,711
this place is rad.
550
00:11:09,753 --> 00:11:11,380
You want a little
551
00:11:09,753 --> 00:11:11,380
side action?
552
00:11:11,422 --> 00:11:12,631
No, no, no, don't muddy
553
00:11:11,422 --> 00:11:12,631
this with side action.
554
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:13,715
Dee, don't do it.
555
00:11:13,757 --> 00:11:14,716
I'll take some
556
00:11:13,757 --> 00:11:14,716
side action.
557
00:11:14,758 --> 00:11:15,717
Don't...
558
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:16,760
Tell you what.
559
00:11:16,801 --> 00:11:18,429
How about, if they win,
560
00:11:18,470 --> 00:11:20,722
I'll take that California
561
00:11:18,470 --> 00:11:20,722
king bed for myself.
562
00:11:20,764 --> 00:11:22,600
Fine, and if they lose,
563
00:11:22,641 --> 00:11:24,602
the three of you got to
564
00:11:22,641 --> 00:11:24,602
sleep with the old man.
565
00:11:24,643 --> 00:11:25,727
(laughs)
566
00:11:25,769 --> 00:11:26,811
DEE:
567
00:11:25,769 --> 00:11:26,811
Fine.
568
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:27,812
Deal.
569
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:27,812
Goddamn it.
570
00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:29,147
Excuse me.
571
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,941
I have to piss.
572
00:11:31,942 --> 00:11:33,944
Out of my penis.
573
00:11:36,488 --> 00:11:37,615
Right.
574
00:11:42,661 --> 00:11:46,624
Okay, well, clearly Mac wants
575
00:11:42,661 --> 00:11:46,624
to speak to me in secret.
576
00:11:46,665 --> 00:11:48,708
Uh, so excuse me.
577
00:11:49,834 --> 00:11:51,587
Wha...?
578
00:11:51,629 --> 00:11:53,672
Oh, good, you got my signal.
579
00:11:51,629 --> 00:11:53,672
Yeah, got your signal.
580
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,424
Dude, we're not gonna make it,
581
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,424
we're not gonna make it.
582
00:11:55,466 --> 00:11:56,758
Yeah, dude,
583
00:11:55,466 --> 00:11:56,758
it's cool, man.
584
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:57,759
W-We'll figure it out.
585
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:57,759
It's...
586
00:11:57,801 --> 00:11:59,010
No, no, it's not cool.
587
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:00,554
There's no way
588
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:00,554
we're gonna make it.
589
00:12:00,596 --> 00:12:01,930
And also, dude,
590
00:12:00,596 --> 00:12:01,930
what's with the hats?
591
00:12:01,972 --> 00:12:03,641
What is with those hats?!
592
00:12:01,972 --> 00:12:03,641
Dennis, I got to know!
593
00:12:03,682 --> 00:12:04,849
They told me the story,
594
00:12:03,682 --> 00:12:04,849
and it didn't make sense,
595
00:12:04,891 --> 00:12:06,560
and now we can't
596
00:12:04,891 --> 00:12:06,560
get it out of them.
597
00:12:06,602 --> 00:12:08,353
Look, dude, I don't
598
00:12:06,602 --> 00:12:08,353
want to sound racist,
599
00:12:08,395 --> 00:12:10,606
but can we just discuss the fact
600
00:12:08,395 --> 00:12:10,606
that it's an old black man?
601
00:12:10,648 --> 00:12:12,608
Yeah, mmm.
602
00:12:10,648 --> 00:12:12,608
It was supposed
603
00:12:10,648 --> 00:12:12,608
to be an old man.
604
00:12:12,650 --> 00:12:14,443
Just an old man.
605
00:12:12,650 --> 00:12:14,443
Now it's a black man.
606
00:12:14,485 --> 00:12:16,027
Dude, that's, like, a whole
607
00:12:14,485 --> 00:12:16,027
other thing. That's two things.
608
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:17,779
That's two things,
609
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:17,779
it's two things.
610
00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:18,780
All right,
611
00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:18,780
you know what, let's...
612
00:12:18,822 --> 00:12:20,574
Maybe we just...
613
00:12:18,822 --> 00:12:20,574
we-we just...
614
00:12:20,616 --> 00:12:22,200
we take the California king.
615
00:12:20,616 --> 00:12:22,200
I mean, that's a big bed.
616
00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,411
You want to share the bed
617
00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,411
with an old black man?
618
00:12:24,453 --> 00:12:25,704
No, of course not, I...
619
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:26,997
All right,
620
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:26,997
that sounded racist.
621
00:12:27,038 --> 00:12:28,790
I don't want to share
622
00:12:27,038 --> 00:12:28,790
a bed with an old man.
623
00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:29,874
I'm just saying
624
00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:29,874
it's a big bed,
625
00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:31,042
and we could probably
626
00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:31,042
work it out.
627
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:33,587
Okay, so picture
628
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:33,587
big bed, big bed.
629
00:12:33,629 --> 00:12:34,838
Me on the side,
630
00:12:33,629 --> 00:12:34,838
you know, you right here.
631
00:12:34,879 --> 00:12:36,256
Old man, right here.
632
00:12:34,879 --> 00:12:36,256
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
633
00:12:36,298 --> 00:12:38,800
Why am I in the middle? Black
634
00:12:36,298 --> 00:12:38,800
man should be in the middle.
635
00:12:38,842 --> 00:12:40,385
Don't call him "black man."
636
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,012
His name's not "black man."
637
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,012
His name's "old man."
638
00:12:42,053 --> 00:12:43,597
Let's stick with "old man."
639
00:12:42,053 --> 00:12:43,597
Okay.
640
00:12:43,639 --> 00:12:44,806
Just sounds better.
641
00:12:44,848 --> 00:12:46,808
All right,
642
00:12:44,848 --> 00:12:46,808
so how about this?
643
00:12:46,850 --> 00:12:49,811
You and I on the big bed,
644
00:12:46,850 --> 00:12:49,811
side-by-side, black man, he's...
645
00:12:49,853 --> 00:12:51,271
Now you got me doing it.
646
00:12:49,853 --> 00:12:51,271
Mmm.
647
00:12:51,313 --> 00:12:53,732
Old man is down at the bottom,
648
00:12:51,313 --> 00:12:53,732
sideways, like a dog.
649
00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:55,817
Are you calling
650
00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:55,817
black people dogs?
651
00:12:55,859 --> 00:12:58,028
No, that's not what I...
652
00:12:55,859 --> 00:12:58,028
That's very racist.
653
00:12:58,069 --> 00:12:59,988
What the hell is going...?
654
00:12:58,069 --> 00:12:59,988
(gasps)
655
00:13:00,030 --> 00:13:01,823
Oh, my God.
656
00:13:01,865 --> 00:13:03,825
You guys are cracking,
657
00:13:01,865 --> 00:13:03,825
aren't you?
658
00:13:01,865 --> 00:13:03,825
(scoffs)
659
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:06,620
Nah, it's-it's, like... fine.
660
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:06,620
Nah, it's fine.
661
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:06,620
What?!
662
00:13:06,662 --> 00:13:08,747
It's soul-crushing, Dee!
663
00:13:06,662 --> 00:13:08,747
Oh, my God, I can't make
664
00:13:06,662 --> 00:13:08,747
this house into a home.
665
00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:09,873
I didn't go to
666
00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:09,873
school for that.
667
00:13:09,914 --> 00:13:11,625
He didn't go to school for it.
668
00:13:09,914 --> 00:13:11,625
No.
669
00:13:11,667 --> 00:13:13,460
Well, why did you let me
670
00:13:11,667 --> 00:13:13,460
take the side action?!
671
00:13:13,502 --> 00:13:15,295
I told you not to take
672
00:13:13,502 --> 00:13:15,295
the side action!
673
00:13:13,502 --> 00:13:15,295
You bitch! You bitch!
674
00:13:15,337 --> 00:13:17,422
Why didn't you yell it
675
00:13:15,337 --> 00:13:17,422
so I could hear it?
676
00:13:15,337 --> 00:13:17,422
I'm tired of yelling.
677
00:13:17,464 --> 00:13:19,717
Damn it. Now we got to figure
678
00:13:17,464 --> 00:13:19,717
out where Dee goes in the bed.
679
00:13:19,758 --> 00:13:21,926
DENNIS: Oh, right, Dee's
680
00:13:19,758 --> 00:13:21,926
got to be in the bed.
681
00:13:19,758 --> 00:13:21,926
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
682
00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:23,512
I'll tell you exactly
683
00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:23,512
where Dee goes, okay?
684
00:13:23,554 --> 00:13:24,846
Dee goes right
685
00:13:23,554 --> 00:13:24,846
in the goddamn middle
686
00:13:24,888 --> 00:13:26,890
of her brand-new
687
00:13:24,888 --> 00:13:26,890
California king-size bed
688
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:28,892
all by herself.
689
00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:31,228
How are we even having
690
00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:31,228
this conversation?!
691
00:13:31,269 --> 00:13:32,688
All you boys
692
00:13:31,269 --> 00:13:32,688
have to do...
693
00:13:32,730 --> 00:13:36,358
Guys, all you got to do
694
00:13:32,730 --> 00:13:36,358
to win is just exist.
695
00:13:39,695 --> 00:13:41,572
Hey, morning, buddy.
696
00:13:41,613 --> 00:13:43,114
You're up early.
697
00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:44,866
Yeah, I'm up early,
698
00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:44,866
and I'm feeling great.
699
00:13:44,908 --> 00:13:46,868
You know, I was thinking
700
00:13:44,908 --> 00:13:46,868
about it, and Dee was right.
701
00:13:46,910 --> 00:13:48,870
All we have to do is exist here
702
00:13:46,910 --> 00:13:48,870
for the next couple weeks,
703
00:13:48,912 --> 00:13:50,121
and we win this bet.
704
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,331
So... check
705
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,331
this out.
706
00:13:51,373 --> 00:13:53,875
I made you that.
707
00:13:53,917 --> 00:13:55,711
"Mac's Honey Do List"?
708
00:13:53,917 --> 00:13:55,711
Yep.
709
00:13:55,753 --> 00:13:57,962
That is a list of chores to
710
00:13:55,753 --> 00:13:57,962
give you a sense of purpose,
711
00:13:58,004 --> 00:13:59,923
so you don't feel so
712
00:13:58,004 --> 00:13:59,923
cooped up and lonely.
713
00:13:59,964 --> 00:14:02,342
How's a list of chores going
714
00:13:59,964 --> 00:14:02,342
to make me feel less lonely?
715
00:14:02,384 --> 00:14:04,886
Well, check out
716
00:14:02,384 --> 00:14:04,886
chore number one.
717
00:14:04,928 --> 00:14:06,888
"Name the dog."
718
00:14:06,930 --> 00:14:08,807
Well, that's so stupid.
719
00:14:06,930 --> 00:14:08,807
I don't have a dog.
720
00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:10,892
You sure about that?
721
00:14:10,934 --> 00:14:12,477
Yeah, positive.
722
00:14:10,934 --> 00:14:12,477
I don't have a dog.
723
00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:13,812
I mean, I had Poppins,
724
00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:13,812
but he's gone.
725
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,188
Are you sure?
726
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,188
I don't have a dog.
727
00:14:15,230 --> 00:14:16,940
What do you mean, am I sure?
728
00:14:15,230 --> 00:14:16,940
Of course I'm sure.
729
00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:17,899
I wouldn't
730
00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:17,899
be so sure.
731
00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:19,484
What are you doing?
732
00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:19,484
Why...
733
00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:20,819
What... are you okay?
734
00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:20,819
Look behind you, asshole.
735
00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:22,904
Oh. (gasps)
736
00:14:22,946 --> 00:14:24,906
You got me a dog?
737
00:14:22,946 --> 00:14:24,906
Yeah.
738
00:14:24,948 --> 00:14:27,325
Oh, my God, he's so cute!
739
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:28,910
I mean, he's no Poppins, but...
740
00:14:28,952 --> 00:14:30,912
Yeah, he's a lot better
741
00:14:28,952 --> 00:14:30,912
than Poppins, trust me.
742
00:14:30,954 --> 00:14:32,497
Oh, Dennis, Dennis.
743
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:33,915
I'm gonna
744
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:33,915
name him Dennis.
745
00:14:33,957 --> 00:14:35,542
Huh?
746
00:14:35,584 --> 00:14:37,628
You're Dennis.
747
00:14:35,584 --> 00:14:37,628
He's Dennis Jr.
748
00:14:37,669 --> 00:14:39,087
Weird.
749
00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:41,005
Um, but sure, yeah, that's fine.
750
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:42,424
Hey, so why don't
751
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:42,424
you go ahead
752
00:14:42,466 --> 00:14:43,759
and cross number one
753
00:14:42,466 --> 00:14:43,759
off the list there?
754
00:14:43,801 --> 00:14:45,343
See how it feels.
755
00:14:43,801 --> 00:14:45,343
Okay, yeah.
756
00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:47,929
Hey, what's a-a couple weeks
757
00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:47,929
between two best friends, right?
758
00:14:47,971 --> 00:14:49,431
It's whatever we make of it.
759
00:14:49,473 --> 00:14:51,015
So why don't we agree right now
760
00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:53,644
to make these next few weeks
761
00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:53,644
the best of our lives?
762
00:14:53,685 --> 00:14:54,936
You with me, buddy?
763
00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:56,354
I'm with you.
764
00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:58,649
I'm gonna raise this guy
765
00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:58,649
like he was our own son.
766
00:14:58,690 --> 00:14:59,941
Okay.
767
00:14:58,690 --> 00:14:59,941
(laughing)
768
00:14:59,983 --> 00:15:01,025
Yeah. Weird.
769
00:15:01,067 --> 00:15:03,153
♪ I remember when ♪
770
00:15:03,194 --> 00:15:07,783
♪ I remember, I remember
771
00:15:03,194 --> 00:15:07,783
when I lost my mind... ♪
772
00:15:07,825 --> 00:15:09,951
No, don't merge, don't merge.
773
00:15:07,825 --> 00:15:09,951
We're all... we'll all wait!
774
00:15:09,993 --> 00:15:12,245
We'll all wait
775
00:15:09,993 --> 00:15:12,245
for you to send your text!
776
00:15:12,287 --> 00:15:13,955
You fat pig!
777
00:15:13,997 --> 00:15:16,625
How you doing, neighbor?
778
00:15:16,667 --> 00:15:19,628
(whirring)
779
00:15:16,667 --> 00:15:19,628
♪ Does that make me crazy? ♪
780
00:15:19,670 --> 00:15:20,629
Shut up!
781
00:15:20,671 --> 00:15:22,380
(chirping)
782
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:25,634
♪ Does that make me crazy? ♪
783
00:15:25,676 --> 00:15:28,386
♪ Does that make me crazy?
784
00:15:25,676 --> 00:15:28,386
DENNIS:
785
00:15:25,676 --> 00:15:28,386
I'm not letting you in, pig!
786
00:15:28,428 --> 00:15:30,430
Gonna show up to work,
787
00:15:28,428 --> 00:15:30,430
have everybody be like,
788
00:15:30,472 --> 00:15:31,973
"Why is there blood
789
00:15:30,472 --> 00:15:31,973
all over you?"
790
00:15:32,015 --> 00:15:33,851
'Cause I had to slit
791
00:15:32,015 --> 00:15:33,851
the guy's throat
792
00:15:33,892 --> 00:15:35,268
who causes all the traffic!
793
00:15:35,310 --> 00:15:37,979
Boy, it sure is
794
00:15:35,310 --> 00:15:37,979
a hot one, huh?
795
00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:41,983
♪ Who do you,
796
00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:41,983
who do you think you are? ♪
797
00:15:42,025 --> 00:15:43,777
♪ Ha ha ha, bless your soul ♪
798
00:15:43,819 --> 00:15:44,986
(barking)
799
00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:46,488
(chirping loudly)
800
00:15:46,530 --> 00:15:48,281
♪ You really think ♪
801
00:15:46,530 --> 00:15:48,281
Shut up.
802
00:15:48,323 --> 00:15:49,991
♪ You're in control? ♪
803
00:15:48,323 --> 00:15:49,991
(whirring)
804
00:15:50,033 --> 00:15:51,075
(laughing):
805
00:15:50,033 --> 00:15:51,075
I can't believe it.
806
00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:53,370
♪ Well, I think you're crazy ♪
807
00:15:53,411 --> 00:15:55,246
Goddamn it! Damn it...
808
00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:57,957
I hate the (bleep) suburbs!
809
00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:57,957
♪ I think you're crazy ♪
810
00:16:00,669 --> 00:16:02,671
♪ I think you're crazy... ♪
811
00:16:07,050 --> 00:16:09,010
WALLY:
812
00:16:07,050 --> 00:16:09,010
Hey, buddy.
813
00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:11,012
Haven't seen you
814
00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:11,012
for a bit.
815
00:16:11,054 --> 00:16:13,014
You've probably
816
00:16:11,054 --> 00:16:13,014
been staying inside
817
00:16:13,056 --> 00:16:15,016
to avoid this, uh,
818
00:16:13,056 --> 00:16:15,016
heat wave, huh?
819
00:16:15,058 --> 00:16:17,060
Boy, it's been hot.
820
00:16:17,101 --> 00:16:18,729
It's hot, huh?
821
00:16:19,855 --> 00:16:21,899
Yeah.
822
00:16:21,940 --> 00:16:23,274
It is super hot.
823
00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:25,068
Yeah.
824
00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:27,404
It's getting real hot
825
00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:27,404
around here.
826
00:16:27,445 --> 00:16:30,281
So hot, Wally.
827
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:33,243
But you don't really know
828
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:33,243
what hot is, do you?
829
00:16:33,284 --> 00:16:35,245
Hot's a storm.
830
00:16:35,286 --> 00:16:37,664
You ever been in a storm, Wally?
831
00:16:37,706 --> 00:16:41,042
I mean, a real storm?
832
00:16:41,084 --> 00:16:44,922
Not a thunderstorm,
833
00:16:41,084 --> 00:16:44,922
but a storm of fists
834
00:16:44,963 --> 00:16:47,215
raining down on your head.
835
00:16:47,257 --> 00:16:49,509
Blasting you in the face.
836
00:16:49,551 --> 00:16:52,053
Pummeling you
837
00:16:49,551 --> 00:16:52,053
in the stomach.
838
00:16:52,095 --> 00:16:55,056
Hitting you in the chest
839
00:16:52,095 --> 00:16:55,056
so hard
840
00:16:55,098 --> 00:16:56,850
you think
841
00:16:55,098 --> 00:16:56,850
your heart's gonna stop.
842
00:16:56,892 --> 00:16:59,728
You ever been in a storm
843
00:16:56,892 --> 00:16:59,728
like that, Wally?
844
00:17:02,105 --> 00:17:04,148
(screaming)
845
00:17:04,190 --> 00:17:06,150
MAC:
846
00:17:04,190 --> 00:17:06,150
Dennis.
847
00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:07,527
Dennis.
848
00:17:10,321 --> 00:17:12,031
You okay, dude?
849
00:17:14,117 --> 00:17:15,159
Yeah.
850
00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:17,913
Who you talking to?
851
00:17:22,333 --> 00:17:25,086
No one.
852
00:17:25,128 --> 00:17:26,671
What's that?
853
00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:28,799
Dog grave.
854
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:31,134
Oh.
855
00:17:33,136 --> 00:17:35,346
Anything exciting
856
00:17:33,136 --> 00:17:35,346
happen at work today?
857
00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:38,141
Uh-uh.
858
00:17:38,182 --> 00:17:39,768
Well, I called up there.
859
00:17:39,810 --> 00:17:41,812
They... they said
860
00:17:39,810 --> 00:17:41,812
you weren't even there.
861
00:17:43,229 --> 00:17:44,898
Can we not talk about my day?
862
00:17:44,940 --> 00:17:46,107
Sure.
863
00:17:46,149 --> 00:17:48,109
Perhaps we can talk
864
00:17:46,149 --> 00:17:48,109
about my day.
865
00:17:48,151 --> 00:17:50,111
And how was your day?
866
00:17:50,153 --> 00:17:51,362
Not great.
867
00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,406
You know, with the dog dying
868
00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,406
and all, but...
869
00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:55,826
somehow, old Mac
870
00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:55,826
pulled it together.
871
00:17:55,867 --> 00:17:58,119
He cooked for you,
872
00:17:55,867 --> 00:17:58,119
and he cleaned for you.
873
00:17:58,161 --> 00:18:00,747
In fact, Dennis,
874
00:17:58,161 --> 00:18:00,747
everything I do,
875
00:18:00,789 --> 00:18:02,415
I do for you.
876
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,127
What are you talking about, man?
877
00:18:06,169 --> 00:18:08,755
I'm talking about
878
00:18:06,169 --> 00:18:08,755
everything I do, I do for you!
879
00:18:08,797 --> 00:18:10,007
And everything you do,
880
00:18:10,048 --> 00:18:12,175
you do for yourself!
881
00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:14,052
Sleeping in your car.
882
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:15,595
Eating at Applebee's.
883
00:18:15,637 --> 00:18:17,514
Were you spying on me?
884
00:18:17,555 --> 00:18:19,140
Oh, don't you turn this
885
00:18:17,555 --> 00:18:19,140
around on me.
886
00:18:19,182 --> 00:18:20,600
All you do is think
887
00:18:19,182 --> 00:18:20,600
about yourself!
888
00:18:20,642 --> 00:18:22,060
You didn't even notice
889
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:23,687
that I switched up
890
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:23,687
the mac and cheese.
891
00:18:24,813 --> 00:18:26,189
Is that what this is about?
892
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:29,526
The goddamn
893
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:29,526
mac and cheese?
894
00:18:29,567 --> 00:18:31,444
Well, yeah, I noticed!
895
00:18:31,486 --> 00:18:33,154
You put meat hunks in it!
896
00:18:33,196 --> 00:18:35,365
Wow! Hunks of meat!
897
00:18:35,406 --> 00:18:37,075
Mmm!
898
00:18:35,406 --> 00:18:37,075
Well, of course Dennis
899
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,160
would like Dennis.
900
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,160
What?
901
00:18:39,202 --> 00:18:41,079
It's Dennis!
902
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:42,163
What are you talking about?
903
00:18:42,205 --> 00:18:43,790
You're eating the dog!
904
00:18:43,832 --> 00:18:45,917
(laughing wildly)
905
00:18:48,211 --> 00:18:51,339
Oh! Oh!
906
00:18:51,381 --> 00:18:53,884
Oh, God! What is
907
00:18:51,381 --> 00:18:53,884
wrong with you?!
908
00:18:53,925 --> 00:18:56,427
I don't know! I guess it was
909
00:18:53,925 --> 00:18:56,427
just a cry for attention!
910
00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:58,179
You didn't even
911
00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:58,179
blink twice
912
00:18:58,221 --> 00:18:59,848
when I told you
913
00:18:58,221 --> 00:18:59,848
that the dog was dead!
914
00:18:59,890 --> 00:19:02,183
I can't live with you anymore
915
00:18:59,890 --> 00:19:02,183
in this goddamn place.
916
00:19:02,225 --> 00:19:03,351
I'm out of here.
917
00:19:03,393 --> 00:19:04,853
I'm gonna go stay
918
00:19:03,393 --> 00:19:04,853
in a hotel.
919
00:19:04,895 --> 00:19:06,855
Where's my suitcase, Mac?
920
00:19:06,897 --> 00:19:08,899
Wait. Wait, wait.
921
00:19:06,897 --> 00:19:08,899
Wait, wait.
922
00:19:08,940 --> 00:19:10,233
Dennis, Dennis,
923
00:19:08,940 --> 00:19:10,233
Dennis, Dennis, Dennis...
924
00:19:17,115 --> 00:19:19,617
Tell me about Mac's
925
00:19:17,115 --> 00:19:19,617
famous mac and cheese.
926
00:19:19,659 --> 00:19:21,411
Okay, I can explain.
927
00:19:21,452 --> 00:19:24,247
I called it my famous
928
00:19:21,452 --> 00:19:24,247
mac and cheese as-as a joke.
929
00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:25,874
But then it seemed
930
00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:25,874
like you like it.
931
00:19:25,916 --> 00:19:28,209
You like that it was
932
00:19:25,916 --> 00:19:28,209
Mac's famous mac and cheese.
933
00:19:28,251 --> 00:19:30,587
And so I just
934
00:19:28,251 --> 00:19:30,587
kept saying it.
935
00:19:28,251 --> 00:19:30,587
You're pathetic.
936
00:19:30,628 --> 00:19:32,213
You're the one
937
00:19:30,628 --> 00:19:32,213
that's sitting at Applebee's
938
00:19:32,255 --> 00:19:33,214
eating pot stickers
939
00:19:32,255 --> 00:19:33,214
all by yourself.
940
00:19:33,256 --> 00:19:34,591
You're the one that's pathetic!
941
00:19:34,632 --> 00:19:35,759
(doorbell rings)
942
00:19:37,135 --> 00:19:38,428
Oh.
943
00:19:38,469 --> 00:19:42,223
Well, that must
944
00:19:38,469 --> 00:19:42,223
be nosy Wally.
945
00:19:42,265 --> 00:19:46,227
Coming to see what all
946
00:19:42,265 --> 00:19:46,227
the fighting's about.
947
00:19:46,269 --> 00:19:50,273
Well... why don't we show him
948
00:19:46,269 --> 00:19:50,273
what all the fighting's about?
949
00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:52,233
Why don't we show
950
00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:52,233
him right now?
951
00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:52,233
Wait, wait, wait!
952
00:19:52,275 --> 00:19:54,111
Dennis, Dennis,
953
00:19:52,275 --> 00:19:54,111
calm down!
954
00:19:54,152 --> 00:19:55,695
Don't you tell me
955
00:19:54,152 --> 00:19:55,695
to calm down.
956
00:19:55,737 --> 00:19:56,863
(smoke alarm chirps)
957
00:19:56,905 --> 00:19:58,448
There's that chirping again.
958
00:19:58,489 --> 00:19:59,741
How are you not hearing that?
959
00:19:59,783 --> 00:20:02,410
News flash, asshole!
960
00:20:02,452 --> 00:20:05,246
I've been hearing it
961
00:20:02,452 --> 00:20:05,246
the entire goddamn time!
962
00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:07,457
Then why wouldn't
963
00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:07,457
you say something?!
964
00:20:07,498 --> 00:20:09,292
Because I hate you!
965
00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:11,669
Oh, my God.
966
00:20:13,004 --> 00:20:14,172
(growls)
967
00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:15,465
(cheering)
968
00:20:15,506 --> 00:20:16,883
You did it!
969
00:20:15,506 --> 00:20:16,883
Look at this!
970
00:20:16,925 --> 00:20:18,885
Huh? We did what?
971
00:20:16,925 --> 00:20:18,885
You got this, man.
972
00:20:18,927 --> 00:20:20,261
In less than a minute...
973
00:20:18,927 --> 00:20:20,261
You're almost there.
974
00:20:20,303 --> 00:20:21,554
...you guys will have
975
00:20:20,303 --> 00:20:21,554
been here a month.
976
00:20:21,596 --> 00:20:22,764
Yep.
977
00:20:21,596 --> 00:20:22,764
We almost...
978
00:20:22,806 --> 00:20:24,265
we almost
979
00:20:22,806 --> 00:20:24,265
won the bet?
980
00:20:22,806 --> 00:20:24,265
Yeah.
981
00:20:24,307 --> 00:20:25,934
We almost did it!
982
00:20:24,307 --> 00:20:25,934
W-W-We almost won the bet?
983
00:20:25,976 --> 00:20:27,268
We're gonna do it!
984
00:20:25,976 --> 00:20:27,268
We're gonna win the bet!
985
00:20:27,310 --> 00:20:28,311
We're gonna win the bet!
986
00:20:27,310 --> 00:20:28,311
Yeah!
987
00:20:28,352 --> 00:20:30,063
Here it is,
988
00:20:28,352 --> 00:20:30,063
paid in full:
989
00:20:30,105 --> 00:20:31,272
one year's rent.
990
00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:32,732
(laughing):
991
00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:32,732
Free rent for a year!
992
00:20:32,774 --> 00:20:35,152
We did it!
993
00:20:32,774 --> 00:20:35,152
We did it!
994
00:20:32,774 --> 00:20:35,152
Free rent for...
995
00:20:35,193 --> 00:20:37,112
Wait.
996
00:20:35,193 --> 00:20:37,112
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
997
00:20:37,154 --> 00:20:38,571
Free rent for where?
998
00:20:38,613 --> 00:20:41,282
For right here.
999
00:20:41,324 --> 00:20:42,659
Here we go.
1000
00:20:42,700 --> 00:20:44,869
In five, four,
1001
00:20:44,911 --> 00:20:47,080
three, two, one.
1002
00:20:47,122 --> 00:20:49,124
♪ ♪
1003
00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:53,753
Hey, guys.
1004
00:20:53,795 --> 00:20:56,380
Is he dead?
1005
00:20:56,422 --> 00:20:58,382
Yeah, I think so.
1006
00:20:59,634 --> 00:21:03,304
Quiet your ass down.
1007
00:21:03,346 --> 00:21:05,306
Sorry, black man.
1008
00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:07,100
Old man.
1009
00:21:07,142 --> 00:21:09,894
Old man.
1010
00:21:07,142 --> 00:21:09,894
Sorry, old black man.
1011
00:21:09,936 --> 00:21:11,562
Goddamn it.
1012
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:49,392
(trumpet plays off-key fanfare)
1013
00:21:49,433 --> 00:21:50,601
Brown.
1014
00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:52,562
Captioned by
1015
00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:52,562
Media Access Group at WGBH
59174
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