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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,712 --> 00:00:04,672 DEE: 2 00:00:02,712 --> 00:00:04,672 Hey, guys. Here we go. 3 00:00:02,712 --> 00:00:04,672 I'm ordering it. 4 00:00:04,714 --> 00:00:06,048 MAC: 5 00:00:04,714 --> 00:00:06,048 Drop the bluff, Dee. 6 00:00:06,090 --> 00:00:07,425 No one believes 7 00:00:06,090 --> 00:00:07,425 you're in an actual movie. 8 00:00:07,466 --> 00:00:09,093 You guys are gonna feel 9 00:00:07,466 --> 00:00:09,093 hella stupid when you see me 10 00:00:09,134 --> 00:00:12,054 acting in a feature film. 11 00:00:09,134 --> 00:00:12,054 "Hella." Are we 12 00:00:09,134 --> 00:00:12,054 saying "hella" now? 13 00:00:12,096 --> 00:00:14,432 'Cause I like it. 14 00:00:12,096 --> 00:00:14,432 No, we're not saying 15 00:00:12,096 --> 00:00:14,432 "hella," okay? 16 00:00:14,473 --> 00:00:16,183 No. 17 00:00:14,473 --> 00:00:16,183 Nobody's saying 18 00:00:14,473 --> 00:00:16,183 "hella" anymore. 19 00:00:16,225 --> 00:00:17,810 I never really got to say it. 20 00:00:16,225 --> 00:00:17,810 "Hella" came and went. 21 00:00:16,225 --> 00:00:17,810 Me, neither. 22 00:00:17,852 --> 00:00:19,186 Dee, can we watch 23 00:00:17,852 --> 00:00:19,186 something else? 24 00:00:19,228 --> 00:00:20,563 Can we watch, like, 25 00:00:19,228 --> 00:00:20,563 a superhero movie or something? 26 00:00:20,605 --> 00:00:23,608 This is such a waste of our... 27 00:00:23,649 --> 00:00:26,151 Oh, that's a nice opening shot. 28 00:00:23,649 --> 00:00:26,151 Symmetrical vista. 29 00:00:26,193 --> 00:00:27,779 It's beautiful. 30 00:00:27,820 --> 00:00:30,322 MAC: Directed by 31 00:00:27,820 --> 00:00:30,322 Pedro Vyes. Who's he? 32 00:00:30,364 --> 00:00:32,324 He's, like, this foreign 33 00:00:30,364 --> 00:00:32,324 art house director. 34 00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:34,869 Oh. Ooh... 35 00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:34,869 Foreign director. 36 00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:34,869 Very impressive. 37 00:00:34,911 --> 00:00:36,328 Okay, you guys, be quiet. 38 00:00:34,911 --> 00:00:36,328 This is my scene. 39 00:00:36,370 --> 00:00:39,081 Pretty early for a whiskey. 40 00:00:39,123 --> 00:00:41,041 Or pretty late. 41 00:00:41,083 --> 00:00:42,209 Why don't you make it 42 00:00:41,083 --> 00:00:42,209 a double. 43 00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:45,630 Oh, yeah? A little hair 44 00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:45,630 of the dog that bit you? 45 00:00:45,671 --> 00:00:46,839 (chuckles) 46 00:00:45,671 --> 00:00:46,839 MAC: 47 00:00:45,671 --> 00:00:46,839 Yeah, Dee, 48 00:00:46,881 --> 00:00:48,674 I got to hand it to you. 49 00:00:46,881 --> 00:00:48,674 Y-You've been talking 50 00:00:48,716 --> 00:00:52,261 about doing this for years, 51 00:00:48,716 --> 00:00:52,261 and... Is that Richard Grieco? 52 00:00:54,138 --> 00:00:56,098 Hi. 53 00:00:56,140 --> 00:00:57,976 Aw, Grieco. I love that 54 00:00:56,140 --> 00:00:57,976 guy. Where's he been? 55 00:00:58,017 --> 00:01:00,979 Richard Grieco 56 00:00:58,017 --> 00:01:00,979 is in an art house movie? 57 00:01:01,020 --> 00:01:03,314 That seems odd. 58 00:01:01,020 --> 00:01:03,314 That's a little strange. 59 00:01:01,020 --> 00:01:03,314 Yeah, it's a little stra... 60 00:01:03,355 --> 00:01:05,483 But, you know, they-they always 61 00:01:03,355 --> 00:01:05,483 got to get some kind of a name 62 00:01:05,524 --> 00:01:08,861 in order to finance the mo... 63 00:01:05,524 --> 00:01:08,861 Oh, now he's being blown. 64 00:01:05,524 --> 00:01:08,861 DEE: Right. 65 00:01:08,903 --> 00:01:13,073 (gang exclaiming, laughing) 66 00:01:13,115 --> 00:01:14,116 Okay. Now-now this makes sense. 67 00:01:14,158 --> 00:01:17,119 So, Dee, 68 00:01:14,158 --> 00:01:17,119 you clearly made a porn. 69 00:01:14,158 --> 00:01:17,119 This is a porno! 70 00:01:17,161 --> 00:01:19,246 What? No? It's not 71 00:01:17,161 --> 00:01:19,246 a porn. You guys, 72 00:01:19,288 --> 00:01:21,290 the-the foreigners, they have 73 00:01:19,288 --> 00:01:21,290 a much more evolved view of sex. 74 00:01:21,332 --> 00:01:22,625 This is... this is art. 75 00:01:22,667 --> 00:01:24,002 (woman grunting) 76 00:01:24,043 --> 00:01:25,670 (moans) 77 00:01:25,711 --> 00:01:27,672 Dee, what channel 78 00:01:25,711 --> 00:01:27,672 did you order this from? 79 00:01:27,713 --> 00:01:28,714 Cinemax. 80 00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:30,424 ALL: 81 00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:30,424 Cinemax?! 82 00:01:30,466 --> 00:01:32,343 Cinemax doesn't 83 00:01:30,466 --> 00:01:32,343 make art. 84 00:01:32,384 --> 00:01:35,638 You guys, Pedro is-is 85 00:01:32,384 --> 00:01:35,638 an edgy, foreign director. 86 00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:36,764 Where's he from? 87 00:01:36,806 --> 00:01:38,641 Puerto Rico. 88 00:01:36,806 --> 00:01:38,641 Oh! 89 00:01:38,683 --> 00:01:39,767 Puerto Rico? 90 00:01:38,683 --> 00:01:39,767 Puerto Rico? 91 00:01:38,683 --> 00:01:39,767 Puerto Rico! 92 00:01:39,809 --> 00:01:41,310 MAC: 93 00:01:39,809 --> 00:01:41,310 Oh, man... 94 00:01:41,352 --> 00:01:44,355 Dee, you made a Skinemax flick 95 00:01:41,352 --> 00:01:44,355 with a Puerto Rican pervert. 96 00:01:44,396 --> 00:01:46,398 Congratulations. Good thing 97 00:01:44,396 --> 00:01:46,398 you got us all together. 98 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:49,318 Listen, hey, I did 99 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:49,318 not make a smut film. 100 00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:51,153 GRIECO: 101 00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:51,153 Gobble that cock. 102 00:01:51,195 --> 00:01:52,404 (laughter) 103 00:02:15,970 --> 00:02:18,180 MAC: Now, why is Grieco 104 00:02:15,970 --> 00:02:18,180 resorting to Skinemax? 105 00:02:18,222 --> 00:02:19,891 He's got a great career. 106 00:02:18,222 --> 00:02:19,891 He's doing fine. 107 00:02:19,932 --> 00:02:21,183 Actually, it makes sense. 108 00:02:19,932 --> 00:02:21,183 I mean, 109 00:02:21,225 --> 00:02:23,644 erotic films 110 00:02:21,225 --> 00:02:23,644 are very, very in right now. 111 00:02:23,686 --> 00:02:25,521 I mean, Grieco probably didn't 112 00:02:23,686 --> 00:02:25,521 realize he was doing a porn. 113 00:02:25,563 --> 00:02:26,772 I think he thought 114 00:02:25,563 --> 00:02:26,772 he was doing the next 115 00:02:26,814 --> 00:02:28,190 Fifty Shades 116 00:02:26,814 --> 00:02:28,190 of Grey or whatever. 117 00:02:28,232 --> 00:02:29,191 I mean, it's a... 118 00:02:28,232 --> 00:02:29,191 it's a fine line 119 00:02:29,233 --> 00:02:30,693 these days between art and smut. 120 00:02:30,735 --> 00:02:32,194 It really is. 121 00:02:30,735 --> 00:02:32,194 Art's a tricky thing. 122 00:02:32,236 --> 00:02:34,321 The whole art world 123 00:02:32,236 --> 00:02:34,321 is bullshit nowadays. 124 00:02:34,363 --> 00:02:36,323 I mean, like, anything can be 125 00:02:34,363 --> 00:02:36,323 considered art. I'll bet you 126 00:02:36,365 --> 00:02:40,202 Charlie's doodlings could be 127 00:02:36,365 --> 00:02:40,202 considered art by some people. 128 00:02:40,244 --> 00:02:42,496 Well, that's 'cause my drawings 129 00:02:40,244 --> 00:02:42,496 are art. 130 00:02:42,538 --> 00:02:44,999 You're not an artist, dude. 131 00:02:42,538 --> 00:02:44,999 You're drawing with chalk. 132 00:02:45,041 --> 00:02:47,334 No, I'm drawing with marker 133 00:02:45,041 --> 00:02:47,334 and, like, pen and stuff. 134 00:02:47,376 --> 00:02:48,544 I'm just eating the chalk. 135 00:02:48,586 --> 00:02:49,795 Charlie, don't eat chalk. 136 00:02:49,837 --> 00:02:50,796 Well, it settles my stomach. 137 00:02:50,838 --> 00:02:51,714 My stomach's a little... 138 00:02:51,756 --> 00:02:53,215 If your stomach hurts, 139 00:02:51,756 --> 00:02:53,215 eat a Tums. 140 00:02:53,257 --> 00:02:55,093 What's the difference? 141 00:02:53,257 --> 00:02:55,093 One is chalk! 142 00:02:55,134 --> 00:02:56,343 Well, I don't like 143 00:02:55,134 --> 00:02:56,343 wasting Tums. 144 00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:58,012 Tums is very good 145 00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:58,012 to draw with. 146 00:02:58,054 --> 00:02:59,388 This maniac 147 00:02:58,054 --> 00:02:59,388 is an artist? 148 00:02:59,430 --> 00:03:01,140 I'll bet you 149 00:02:59,430 --> 00:03:01,140 if I hung one 150 00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:02,266 of Charlie's doodles 151 00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:02,266 in a modern art gallery, 152 00:03:02,307 --> 00:03:03,809 people would not know 153 00:03:02,307 --> 00:03:03,809 the difference. 154 00:03:03,851 --> 00:03:05,227 Mm. No. No, I disagree. 155 00:03:05,269 --> 00:03:07,563 No, art has to come 156 00:03:05,269 --> 00:03:07,563 from a more meaningful place. 157 00:03:07,605 --> 00:03:09,189 It can't just be silly nonsense. 158 00:03:09,231 --> 00:03:11,191 I mean, 159 00:03:09,231 --> 00:03:11,191 take my erotic memoirs, 160 00:03:11,233 --> 00:03:12,484 for example. 161 00:03:11,233 --> 00:03:12,484 (chuckles) 162 00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:14,987 Now, that was art. 163 00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:14,987 That was smut. 164 00:03:15,029 --> 00:03:17,239 No, dude, what I do is art. 165 00:03:15,029 --> 00:03:17,239 And you know what else? 166 00:03:17,281 --> 00:03:19,241 I think I should film it. 167 00:03:17,281 --> 00:03:19,241 Yeah. 168 00:03:19,283 --> 00:03:22,244 I mean, guys, I'd be a fool not 169 00:03:19,283 --> 00:03:22,244 to ride this erotic tidal wave 170 00:03:22,286 --> 00:03:23,829 our culture seems to be on, 171 00:03:22,286 --> 00:03:23,829 film it, 172 00:03:23,871 --> 00:03:26,248 do the next Fifty Shades 173 00:03:23,871 --> 00:03:26,248 of Grey, my style, you know? 174 00:03:26,290 --> 00:03:28,417 My film would be real, 175 00:03:26,290 --> 00:03:28,417 it would be tasteful, 176 00:03:28,459 --> 00:03:29,752 it would be... 177 00:03:28,459 --> 00:03:29,752 it would be subtle. 178 00:03:29,794 --> 00:03:31,837 It wouldn't be some goddamn 179 00:03:29,794 --> 00:03:31,837 Puerto Rican smut. 180 00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:35,466 I'm down to try this, like, 181 00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:35,466 art gallery idea of yours. 182 00:03:35,507 --> 00:03:37,259 What do you think 183 00:03:35,507 --> 00:03:37,259 Grieco would do? 184 00:03:37,301 --> 00:03:39,219 He wouldn't eat 185 00:03:37,301 --> 00:03:39,219 chalk. 186 00:03:47,145 --> 00:03:49,688 Yes, but I just don't understand 187 00:03:47,145 --> 00:03:49,688 why you're choosing 188 00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,107 to dress like 189 00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,107 Richard Grieco. 190 00:03:51,149 --> 00:03:53,025 Well, because he's a cool bro 191 00:03:51,149 --> 00:03:53,025 and I'm a cool bro. 192 00:03:53,067 --> 00:03:54,652 I just want to do a Grieco 193 00:03:53,067 --> 00:03:54,652 thing. I'm vibing with it. 194 00:03:54,693 --> 00:03:57,279 I'm vibing with it, man. 195 00:03:54,693 --> 00:03:57,279 Stop saying that you're vibing 196 00:03:54,693 --> 00:03:57,279 and "bro." 197 00:03:57,321 --> 00:03:58,656 You know what, why don't you go 198 00:03:57,321 --> 00:03:58,656 mingle, and Frank and I 199 00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:00,616 will handle this. 200 00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:00,616 Thank you. 201 00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:00,616 All right, you do it. 202 00:04:00,658 --> 00:04:02,242 All right, Frank. 203 00:04:00,658 --> 00:04:02,242 Oh, oh, oh, oh. 204 00:04:00,658 --> 00:04:02,242 Leave him alone. 205 00:04:02,284 --> 00:04:04,244 Look, here's a spot. 206 00:04:02,284 --> 00:04:04,244 Here's a spot. 207 00:04:02,284 --> 00:04:04,244 What? 208 00:04:04,286 --> 00:04:05,746 Yeah. 209 00:04:04,286 --> 00:04:05,746 Just keep... keep an eye out. 210 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:08,207 Okay. 211 00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:12,753 That's good. That's good. 212 00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:12,753 Mmm. 213 00:04:12,795 --> 00:04:14,296 (quietly:) 214 00:04:12,795 --> 00:04:14,296 Oh, yeah. Looks perfect. 215 00:04:14,338 --> 00:04:16,298 Oh, wow. I like this one. 216 00:04:14,338 --> 00:04:16,298 Oh. 217 00:04:16,340 --> 00:04:19,259 That's art. That's art. 218 00:04:16,340 --> 00:04:19,259 I like that piece. 219 00:04:16,340 --> 00:04:19,259 Yes, that's... 220 00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:26,308 MAC (whispering): 221 00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:26,308 She's going for it. 222 00:04:26,350 --> 00:04:29,020 She loves it. 223 00:04:29,061 --> 00:04:31,689 She loves it. 224 00:04:29,061 --> 00:04:31,689 She's going for it. 225 00:04:31,730 --> 00:04:33,983 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! 226 00:04:31,730 --> 00:04:33,983 What the hell are you doing? 227 00:04:31,730 --> 00:04:33,983 Whoa. Hey, lady. Lady. 228 00:04:34,025 --> 00:04:35,693 You can't throw 229 00:04:34,025 --> 00:04:35,693 art in the trash. 230 00:04:35,734 --> 00:04:38,320 Oh, that wasn't art. 231 00:04:35,734 --> 00:04:38,320 It was garbage. 232 00:04:38,362 --> 00:04:40,447 Wait, wait, wait a second. 233 00:04:38,362 --> 00:04:40,447 Wait a second. 234 00:04:40,489 --> 00:04:41,991 I mean, how-how is that art 235 00:04:42,033 --> 00:04:44,035 and this is trash? 236 00:04:42,033 --> 00:04:44,035 I mean, who's to say, really? 237 00:04:44,076 --> 00:04:46,787 Well, I'm to say. 238 00:04:44,076 --> 00:04:46,787 It's my gallery. (chuckles) 239 00:04:46,829 --> 00:04:48,664 Okay. Then please explain to me 240 00:04:48,706 --> 00:04:49,665 how that is art 241 00:04:49,707 --> 00:04:50,916 and this is garbage. 242 00:04:50,958 --> 00:04:53,293 Well, it's all about context. 243 00:04:53,335 --> 00:04:56,255 The story behind each piece 244 00:04:53,335 --> 00:04:56,255 is part of what endows it 245 00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:58,340 with meaning. 246 00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:58,340 For example, this artist 247 00:04:58,382 --> 00:04:59,508 worked for 248 00:04:58,382 --> 00:04:59,508 30 years 249 00:04:59,550 --> 00:05:02,845 before finally finding 250 00:04:59,550 --> 00:05:02,845 his voice. 251 00:05:02,887 --> 00:05:04,513 He left his home 252 00:05:02,887 --> 00:05:04,513 when he was a boy 253 00:05:04,555 --> 00:05:08,308 to escape the Nazis, 254 00:05:04,555 --> 00:05:08,308 fled to Paris, 255 00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:11,311 and painted the poor children 256 00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:11,311 he saw in the streets. 257 00:05:11,353 --> 00:05:13,605 ♪ ♪ 258 00:05:13,647 --> 00:05:16,817 (man shouting in German) 259 00:05:13,647 --> 00:05:16,817 The ambiguity he 260 00:05:13,647 --> 00:05:16,817 uses to paint children 261 00:05:16,859 --> 00:05:20,905 and animals. 262 00:05:16,859 --> 00:05:20,905 (dog barking, monkey screeching) 263 00:05:20,946 --> 00:05:23,199 His work 264 00:05:20,946 --> 00:05:23,199 provokes. 265 00:05:23,241 --> 00:05:25,450 It raises 266 00:05:23,241 --> 00:05:25,450 questions. 267 00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:26,994 Are we children? 268 00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:26,994 (children chattering) 269 00:05:27,036 --> 00:05:29,121 Are we animals? 270 00:05:29,163 --> 00:05:34,168 (all sounds overlapping) 271 00:05:29,163 --> 00:05:34,168 Are children animals? 272 00:05:36,254 --> 00:05:38,589 ♪ ♪ 273 00:05:41,300 --> 00:05:43,969 (overlapping sounds rewinding) 274 00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:47,223 MAC: If it's context you 275 00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:47,223 want... Context. Okay. 276 00:05:47,265 --> 00:05:50,392 Well, the artist that did this, 277 00:05:47,265 --> 00:05:50,392 his life is, like, total shit. 278 00:05:50,434 --> 00:05:52,644 I mean, like, way worse 279 00:05:50,434 --> 00:05:52,644 than this Nazi painter. 280 00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:55,106 Oh. Hey, Charlie? 281 00:05:55,147 --> 00:05:56,398 Yeah, uh... What-what 282 00:05:55,147 --> 00:05:56,398 are you doing, man? 283 00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,943 What's up, bro? 284 00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,943 Hey, uh, 285 00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:01,946 this is Charlie. He's the, 286 00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:01,946 uh... he's the artist. 287 00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:04,406 C-Could you tell the lady 288 00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:04,406 how your... Don't do that. 289 00:06:04,448 --> 00:06:06,742 Okay, can you just explain to 290 00:06:04,448 --> 00:06:06,742 her how your life is garbage 291 00:06:06,784 --> 00:06:09,287 so that she... 292 00:06:06,784 --> 00:06:09,287 It's not sw... 293 00:06:06,784 --> 00:06:09,287 Oh, my life's pretty sweet, bro. 294 00:06:09,328 --> 00:06:11,413 Hang out at a bar all day 295 00:06:09,328 --> 00:06:11,413 with my bros. 296 00:06:11,455 --> 00:06:13,415 You know? Go on lots of 297 00:06:11,455 --> 00:06:13,415 adventures. I'm really kind of 298 00:06:13,457 --> 00:06:15,500 a sweet businessman 299 00:06:13,457 --> 00:06:15,500 when I think about it. 300 00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:19,421 He's an illiterate janitor whose 301 00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:19,421 mother tried to abort him in... 302 00:06:19,463 --> 00:06:22,507 Frank, Frank, 303 00:06:19,463 --> 00:06:22,507 tell her, please. 304 00:06:19,463 --> 00:06:22,507 Huh? 305 00:06:22,549 --> 00:06:23,634 What is it? 306 00:06:23,675 --> 00:06:25,844 What-what is it? 307 00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:28,513 It's-it's what we discussed. 308 00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:28,513 It's what we've been discussing. 309 00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:28,513 Oh. 310 00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:30,682 Tell her that Charlie's life 311 00:06:28,555 --> 00:06:30,682 is a piece of shit. Please. 312 00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:33,144 Thank you. 313 00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:33,144 I've got one 314 00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:33,144 of those hella sweet lives... 315 00:06:33,185 --> 00:06:34,436 Stop saying "hella"! 316 00:06:33,185 --> 00:06:34,436 He doesn't... 317 00:06:34,478 --> 00:06:35,479 he doesn't normally 318 00:06:34,478 --> 00:06:35,479 say "hella." 319 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,106 I don't know where 320 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,106 he picked this up. 321 00:06:37,148 --> 00:06:39,441 I'm sorry. 322 00:06:37,148 --> 00:06:39,441 I'm just not interested. 323 00:06:37,148 --> 00:06:39,441 Okay, 324 00:06:39,483 --> 00:06:41,026 well, wait, wait, 325 00:06:39,483 --> 00:06:41,026 we just need to take one... 326 00:06:39,483 --> 00:06:41,026 I'm not interested, either. 327 00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:42,987 I go for more 328 00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:42,987 of the Pam Anderson type, 329 00:06:43,028 --> 00:06:44,446 you know what I mean? 330 00:06:43,028 --> 00:06:44,446 Oh, my God. Okay, look... 331 00:06:44,488 --> 00:06:47,866 I'm not interested. 332 00:06:44,488 --> 00:06:47,866 Goddamn it. 333 00:06:44,488 --> 00:06:47,866 Why did I even bring you two? 334 00:06:50,494 --> 00:06:53,038 "A man enters. 335 00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:57,001 "The room wouldn't be the 336 00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:57,001 only thing he'd enter that day. 337 00:06:57,042 --> 00:07:00,462 His name was Dennis." 338 00:07:00,504 --> 00:07:01,713 I'm-I'm sorry-- 339 00:07:00,504 --> 00:07:01,713 what is happening? 340 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,132 "Silence." 341 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,132 Okay. 342 00:07:03,174 --> 00:07:04,967 "He said. 'A woman's mouth 343 00:07:05,009 --> 00:07:06,844 "'is not for the exiting 344 00:07:05,009 --> 00:07:06,844 of words 345 00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:10,639 "but for the entrance 346 00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:10,639 of a man's... dick.' 347 00:07:12,057 --> 00:07:14,601 "And then he did 348 00:07:12,057 --> 00:07:14,601 put it in there. 349 00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:16,645 In her mouth, I mean." 350 00:07:16,687 --> 00:07:18,356 Okay. 351 00:07:18,397 --> 00:07:21,566 And then they-they have sex 352 00:07:18,397 --> 00:07:21,566 all over the library. 353 00:07:23,361 --> 00:07:24,653 Okay, I, uh, 354 00:07:24,695 --> 00:07:26,488 I-I'm sorry, I don't know 355 00:07:24,695 --> 00:07:26,488 what's happening here. 356 00:07:26,530 --> 00:07:27,614 You must think 357 00:07:26,530 --> 00:07:27,614 I'm somebody else. 358 00:07:27,656 --> 00:07:30,284 Look, look. Sure, I could 359 00:07:27,656 --> 00:07:30,284 leave here right now, 360 00:07:30,326 --> 00:07:32,244 I could take this to Frank 361 00:07:30,326 --> 00:07:32,244 and he would finance it. 362 00:07:32,286 --> 00:07:33,704 But he's gross, you know? 363 00:07:33,745 --> 00:07:36,290 He's basically, like, 364 00:07:33,745 --> 00:07:36,290 the Cinemax of humans. 365 00:07:36,332 --> 00:07:38,792 Okay, I think I'm catching up 366 00:07:36,332 --> 00:07:38,792 here. So you want to make a film 367 00:07:38,834 --> 00:07:41,337 based on the pornographic book 368 00:07:38,834 --> 00:07:41,337 you're reading from. 369 00:07:41,379 --> 00:07:44,464 Look... this is my 370 00:07:41,379 --> 00:07:44,464 Fifty Shades of Grey, lady. 371 00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:46,633 All right? Was the guy 372 00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:46,633 who wrote that gross? 373 00:07:46,675 --> 00:07:48,052 It was written by a woman. 374 00:07:49,594 --> 00:07:51,889 Na... You... no, I know. 375 00:07:51,930 --> 00:07:53,473 That it was written by a woman. 376 00:07:53,515 --> 00:07:54,641 Everybody knows that. 377 00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,518 Yeah, but that's why you needed 378 00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,518 to let me get to the... 379 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:59,063 This was also written 380 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:59,063 by a woman. Yeah. 381 00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:01,940 Writ-Written and to be 382 00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:01,940 directed by... 383 00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:03,734 my sister. 384 00:08:05,361 --> 00:08:07,405 What do you think? 385 00:08:07,446 --> 00:08:09,614 (doorbell rings) 386 00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:11,450 Hey, Dee. 387 00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:11,450 (door closes) 388 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:13,285 Dee, you're not doing 389 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:13,285 anything that matters, right? 390 00:08:13,327 --> 00:08:15,413 You know, I think I'm 391 00:08:13,327 --> 00:08:15,413 finally figuring out 392 00:08:15,454 --> 00:08:18,790 this editing software, and I 393 00:08:15,454 --> 00:08:18,790 have to say I put together 394 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,418 a pretty prime-time 395 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,418 acting reel here. 396 00:08:20,459 --> 00:08:22,544 I doubt it. 397 00:08:20,459 --> 00:08:22,544 Don't show it to me. I don't... 398 00:08:22,586 --> 00:08:24,504 ♪ ♪ 399 00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:29,551 Pretty early for a whiskey. 400 00:08:29,593 --> 00:08:31,553 A little hair of the dog 401 00:08:29,593 --> 00:08:31,553 that bit you? 402 00:08:31,595 --> 00:08:33,555 Using a multi-tiered distribu... 403 00:08:33,597 --> 00:08:34,473 Multi-level marketi... 404 00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:35,557 The Invigaron system. 405 00:08:35,599 --> 00:08:36,934 ♪ ♪ 406 00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:39,311 Brains. 407 00:08:39,353 --> 00:08:41,521 ♪ ♪ 408 00:08:41,563 --> 00:08:42,898 It i... 409 00:08:42,940 --> 00:08:44,024 it's missing something, 410 00:08:42,940 --> 00:08:44,024 isn't it? 411 00:08:44,066 --> 00:08:45,692 Nah, it's great. 412 00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:46,818 Uh, Dee, 413 00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:46,818 you know what I think 414 00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:48,237 the real problem, though, 415 00:08:48,279 --> 00:08:49,863 with the acting business is? 416 00:08:48,279 --> 00:08:49,863 Uh-huh? 417 00:08:49,905 --> 00:08:52,283 Every actor these days 418 00:08:49,905 --> 00:08:52,283 is a multi-hyphenate. 419 00:08:52,324 --> 00:08:53,575 They're doing everything-- 420 00:08:52,324 --> 00:08:53,575 they're writing, 421 00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:55,244 they're directing, 422 00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:55,244 you know. 423 00:08:55,286 --> 00:08:57,579 Mm. 424 00:08:55,286 --> 00:08:57,579 So here's a thought I just had. 425 00:08:57,621 --> 00:08:59,457 How would you like to, um, 426 00:08:59,498 --> 00:09:01,917 direct my erotic memoirs? 427 00:09:01,959 --> 00:09:03,585 I've always wanted to direct. 428 00:09:03,627 --> 00:09:04,628 And you want me to do it? 429 00:09:04,669 --> 00:09:05,587 Yeah, yeah. 430 00:09:04,669 --> 00:09:05,587 Smart. 431 00:09:05,629 --> 00:09:08,299 Smart. You bring 432 00:09:05,629 --> 00:09:08,299 a female perspective in. 433 00:09:08,340 --> 00:09:10,468 Mm-hmm. 434 00:09:08,340 --> 00:09:10,468 It's a very interesting 435 00:09:08,340 --> 00:09:10,468 layer. I like that. 436 00:09:10,509 --> 00:09:11,593 Yeah, it's-it's a good layer. 437 00:09:10,509 --> 00:09:11,593 That's really smart of you. 438 00:09:11,635 --> 00:09:13,137 Yeah, I'll do that. 439 00:09:11,635 --> 00:09:13,137 I'll do that for you. 440 00:09:13,178 --> 00:09:14,721 Okay, so, um... great. 441 00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:17,599 So you'll do that, 442 00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:17,599 and, um... 443 00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:17,599 Yeah, yeah. 444 00:09:17,641 --> 00:09:20,602 now we just need a star that we 445 00:09:17,641 --> 00:09:20,602 can attach on-on short notice. 446 00:09:20,644 --> 00:09:24,022 Don't worry, I got... I got 447 00:09:20,644 --> 00:09:24,022 an idea. I got a lot of ideas. 448 00:09:37,328 --> 00:09:38,703 All right, what about 449 00:09:37,328 --> 00:09:38,703 this one? You know, 450 00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:42,749 I had a dream about, um, 451 00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:42,749 you know, boiled eggs. 452 00:09:42,791 --> 00:09:45,794 So, I, uh... 453 00:09:42,791 --> 00:09:45,794 Okay. What do the... 454 00:09:42,791 --> 00:09:45,794 what do the eggs represent? 455 00:09:45,836 --> 00:09:48,339 Eggs, you know? Like, 456 00:09:45,836 --> 00:09:48,339 uh... from a chicken. 457 00:09:48,380 --> 00:09:51,216 Just eggs? No. 458 00:09:48,380 --> 00:09:51,216 Charlie, you're not getting it. 459 00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:54,219 I need you to draw something 460 00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:54,219 that's profound, you know? 461 00:09:54,261 --> 00:09:56,138 That comes from someplace deep. 462 00:09:56,180 --> 00:09:58,557 But is also childlike 463 00:09:56,180 --> 00:09:58,557 and stupid, to prove my point. 464 00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:00,642 Hey, bro, uh, maybe stop telling 465 00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:00,642 me what to do all the time, 466 00:10:00,684 --> 00:10:03,103 you know? 'Cause if you tell 467 00:10:00,684 --> 00:10:03,103 me what to do, then, like, 468 00:10:03,145 --> 00:10:04,646 you know, that's, like, 469 00:10:03,145 --> 00:10:04,646 I got, like, a lame, 470 00:10:04,688 --> 00:10:06,023 kind of square dude telling me 471 00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:07,649 what to do, you 472 00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:07,649 know? And that's 473 00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:09,651 not really where 474 00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:09,651 art comes from. 475 00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:09,651 Okay, you... 476 00:10:09,693 --> 00:10:12,654 And so I'm gonna draw eggs 477 00:10:09,693 --> 00:10:12,654 that represent eggs, bro. 478 00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:13,989 And it's gonna... it's 479 00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:13,989 gonna be hella cool, man. 480 00:10:14,031 --> 00:10:15,157 You're gonna 481 00:10:14,031 --> 00:10:15,157 like these eggs. 482 00:10:15,199 --> 00:10:16,200 Can I ask you a question? 483 00:10:15,199 --> 00:10:16,200 Do you... do you 484 00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:17,659 want to sell this art or not? 485 00:10:17,701 --> 00:10:19,328 Bro, is this about 486 00:10:17,701 --> 00:10:19,328 making money for you 487 00:10:19,370 --> 00:10:20,454 or is it about 488 00:10:19,370 --> 00:10:20,454 proving your point? 489 00:10:20,496 --> 00:10:21,746 Like, I don't even 490 00:10:20,496 --> 00:10:21,746 know what it is, man. 491 00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,123 It's becoming about both 492 00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,123 for me. I don't know 493 00:10:23,165 --> 00:10:24,082 what it's becoming for you. 494 00:10:24,124 --> 00:10:25,125 Come on, man. 495 00:10:25,167 --> 00:10:26,626 I'm ripping this up. 496 00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:27,669 I'm ripping this up. 497 00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:27,669 That's it. 498 00:10:27,711 --> 00:10:28,670 Bro, stop ripping up 499 00:10:27,711 --> 00:10:28,670 my art, man! 500 00:10:28,712 --> 00:10:30,672 Get in there! 501 00:10:28,712 --> 00:10:30,672 Okay. 502 00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:32,757 You stink! 503 00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:32,757 Ugh. 504 00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:35,344 I found him turning tricks 505 00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:35,344 in the scrap metal yard. 506 00:10:35,386 --> 00:10:38,430 Good news, Charlie. We're 507 00:10:35,386 --> 00:10:38,430 gonna use Cricket now. 508 00:10:38,472 --> 00:10:40,599 Oh. Use me how? 509 00:10:38,472 --> 00:10:40,599 Use what part of me? 510 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:43,852 Relax. You are gonna be 511 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:43,852 the face of Charlie's art. 512 00:10:43,894 --> 00:10:45,229 What? Why, man? 513 00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:47,147 Because he's got, like, 514 00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:47,147 the worst life imaginable, 515 00:10:47,189 --> 00:10:48,524 and that's clearly 516 00:10:47,189 --> 00:10:48,524 what those people want. 517 00:10:48,566 --> 00:10:50,359 That's true, I do have 518 00:10:48,566 --> 00:10:50,359 the worst life. 519 00:10:48,566 --> 00:10:50,359 (chuckles) 520 00:10:50,401 --> 00:10:51,693 You know what, Cricks, why 521 00:10:50,401 --> 00:10:51,693 don't you come over here, 522 00:10:51,735 --> 00:10:53,695 why don't you tell Charlie 523 00:10:51,735 --> 00:10:53,695 what to draw. 524 00:10:53,737 --> 00:10:56,031 Okay. 525 00:10:53,737 --> 00:10:56,031 Tell me wh... I don't 526 00:10:53,737 --> 00:10:56,031 want to draw his drawings. 527 00:10:56,073 --> 00:10:57,533 No, Charlie, 528 00:10:56,073 --> 00:10:57,533 this is gonna work, all right? 529 00:10:57,575 --> 00:10:59,618 Just jump on board, 530 00:10:57,575 --> 00:10:59,618 jump on board. Okay, go ahead. 531 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:02,204 All right, bro... bro. 532 00:11:02,246 --> 00:11:04,706 Oh, all right, fine. 533 00:11:04,748 --> 00:11:06,833 Talk to me, brother. 534 00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:08,252 What's up? 535 00:11:09,753 --> 00:11:11,088 What is he doing? 536 00:11:11,129 --> 00:11:12,339 He's doing, like, 537 00:11:11,129 --> 00:11:12,339 a Grieco thing. 538 00:11:12,381 --> 00:11:14,132 Okay. Uh, all right. 539 00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:15,133 Well, what do you 540 00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:15,133 want to hear about? 541 00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:17,511 You want to hear 542 00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:17,511 about a... dog orgy 543 00:11:17,553 --> 00:11:18,678 or when a cat bit off my toe? 544 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:19,721 Dog orgy, brother. 545 00:11:19,763 --> 00:11:20,722 CRICKET: 546 00:11:19,763 --> 00:11:20,722 Dog orgy. Okay. 547 00:11:20,764 --> 00:11:22,307 This is going great. 548 00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:23,725 Okay, now, Frank, I need you 549 00:11:23,767 --> 00:11:26,019 to go talk to that gallery 550 00:11:23,767 --> 00:11:26,019 owner. Convince her to come 551 00:11:26,061 --> 00:11:28,730 to Paddy's for an art opening 552 00:11:26,061 --> 00:11:28,730 that we're gonna have here. 553 00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:30,690 Oh. 554 00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:30,690 You know? Flash 555 00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:30,690 a little cash. 556 00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:33,444 Pretend you're, like, 557 00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:33,444 a high-society art type. 558 00:11:33,485 --> 00:11:36,738 Oh, I got this. I-I used to hang 559 00:11:33,485 --> 00:11:36,738 with an art crowd in the '70s. 560 00:11:36,780 --> 00:11:39,491 I know these people. 561 00:11:39,533 --> 00:11:42,744 O-Okay. All right. But-but... 562 00:11:39,533 --> 00:11:42,744 play it subtle, all right? 563 00:11:42,786 --> 00:11:44,704 Subtle. Yeah. 564 00:11:44,746 --> 00:11:47,832 Frank. Play it subtle. 565 00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:50,001 (whispers): 566 00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:50,001 Subtle. 567 00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:53,213 Hello! 568 00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:53,213 Hello? 569 00:11:53,255 --> 00:11:56,300 Ango Gablogian, 570 00:11:53,255 --> 00:11:56,300 the art collector. 571 00:11:56,341 --> 00:11:58,760 Charmed, I'm sure. 572 00:11:58,802 --> 00:12:00,762 Yes. 573 00:11:58,802 --> 00:12:00,762 I'm gonna invite you to a show. 574 00:12:00,804 --> 00:12:02,722 Okay. 575 00:12:00,804 --> 00:12:02,722 But first... 576 00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:05,392 allow me to destroy 577 00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:05,392 your gallery. 578 00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:05,392 Oh. 579 00:12:05,434 --> 00:12:06,810 Bullshit. 580 00:12:07,852 --> 00:12:09,771 Bullshit. 581 00:12:09,813 --> 00:12:12,232 Derivative. 582 00:12:12,274 --> 00:12:14,776 That... I love. 583 00:12:14,818 --> 00:12:17,779 I absolutely love. 584 00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:20,699 Um, that's just 585 00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:20,699 the air conditioner. 586 00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,033 I want it. 587 00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,619 It's everything. 588 00:12:23,661 --> 00:12:25,370 I mean, look at us. 589 00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:28,039 We're just air conditioners. 590 00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:28,039 I mean, after all, 591 00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:31,001 we're just walking around 592 00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:31,001 on the planet, breathing, 593 00:12:31,042 --> 00:12:33,795 conditioning the air. 594 00:12:31,042 --> 00:12:33,795 Right. 595 00:12:33,837 --> 00:12:35,422 I condition it hot, 596 00:12:35,464 --> 00:12:37,675 that conditions it cold. 597 00:12:37,716 --> 00:12:39,468 I mean, it's symbiotic, no? 598 00:12:39,510 --> 00:12:42,220 No, it is. 599 00:12:39,510 --> 00:12:42,220 I mean, we're just 600 00:12:39,510 --> 00:12:42,220 the air conditioners 601 00:12:42,262 --> 00:12:43,847 walking around 602 00:12:42,262 --> 00:12:43,847 on this planet, 603 00:12:43,888 --> 00:12:46,808 screwing each 604 00:12:43,888 --> 00:12:46,808 other's brains out. 605 00:12:46,850 --> 00:12:49,311 So true. I never 606 00:12:46,850 --> 00:12:49,311 thought of it like that. 607 00:12:49,353 --> 00:12:51,730 ♪ ♪ 608 00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:54,941 Oh... hello, you. 609 00:12:54,983 --> 00:12:56,401 (gunfire, explosions) 610 00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:03,534 This room won't be 611 00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:03,534 the only thing 612 00:13:03,575 --> 00:13:05,827 that I'll be entering today. 613 00:13:05,869 --> 00:13:06,828 Hey, teach. 614 00:13:05,869 --> 00:13:06,828 DEE: Cut! 615 00:13:06,870 --> 00:13:11,458 A woman's mouth is not 616 00:13:06,870 --> 00:13:11,458 for exiting of words, 617 00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:13,835 but for the entrance 618 00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:13,835 of a man's penis. 619 00:13:13,877 --> 00:13:16,087 DEE: Cut! 620 00:13:13,877 --> 00:13:16,087 DENNIS: Grieco, Grieco, 621 00:13:13,877 --> 00:13:16,087 Grieco, come on, man. 622 00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,048 Shoot her tits. I need some... 623 00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,048 I need a couple... Just... 624 00:13:18,089 --> 00:13:20,842 Get mostly tits on this 625 00:13:18,089 --> 00:13:20,842 one. Lots of emotion. 626 00:13:20,884 --> 00:13:23,387 And I want to feel 627 00:13:20,884 --> 00:13:23,387 a little bit of, uh, 628 00:13:23,428 --> 00:13:27,349 of sadness coming from 629 00:13:23,428 --> 00:13:27,349 your tits. And, action. 630 00:13:27,391 --> 00:13:29,560 A woman's mouth... 631 00:13:27,391 --> 00:13:29,560 DEE: Cut! 632 00:13:29,601 --> 00:13:32,854 "Not for the exiting of words, 633 00:13:29,601 --> 00:13:32,854 it's for the entrance..." 634 00:13:32,896 --> 00:13:34,231 Dee, can you 635 00:13:32,896 --> 00:13:34,231 just let him... 636 00:13:32,896 --> 00:13:34,231 GRIECO: Is there really... 637 00:13:34,272 --> 00:13:35,733 is there really a frigging 638 00:13:34,272 --> 00:13:35,733 difference between "exiting" 639 00:13:35,774 --> 00:13:37,859 and "entering"? 640 00:13:35,774 --> 00:13:37,859 Hey! Excuse me, every... 641 00:13:35,774 --> 00:13:37,859 You know what? 642 00:13:37,901 --> 00:13:39,611 Is there a difference between 643 00:13:37,901 --> 00:13:39,611 "exiting" and "entering"? 644 00:13:39,653 --> 00:13:42,531 GRIECO: 645 00:13:39,653 --> 00:13:42,531 I know there is, but is there... 646 00:13:39,653 --> 00:13:42,531 but words exit. 647 00:13:42,573 --> 00:13:45,450 Okay, okay, you know what? 648 00:13:42,573 --> 00:13:45,450 I-I need a seaweed break. 649 00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:47,202 Grieco, you've had 15 650 00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:47,202 packages of seaweed today. 651 00:13:47,244 --> 00:13:48,662 Guys, Richard needs 652 00:13:47,244 --> 00:13:48,662 a seaweed five. 653 00:13:48,704 --> 00:13:50,121 Another...? 654 00:13:48,704 --> 00:13:50,121 Oh, goddamn it! 655 00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,248 Can we just get 656 00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,248 the scene, please? 657 00:13:51,289 --> 00:13:52,999 Just like it was 658 00:13:51,289 --> 00:13:52,999 in high school? 659 00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,167 You know, about that. 660 00:13:54,209 --> 00:13:55,627 What exactly happened 661 00:13:54,209 --> 00:13:55,627 in high school? 662 00:13:55,669 --> 00:13:57,879 'Cause it sounds like 663 00:13:55,669 --> 00:13:57,879 you had sex with a teacher. 664 00:13:57,921 --> 00:13:58,880 Uh, well, no, she 665 00:13:57,921 --> 00:13:58,880 wasn't a teacher. 666 00:13:58,922 --> 00:14:00,006 She was a hot 667 00:13:58,922 --> 00:14:00,006 young librarian. 668 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:02,050 Are you talking about 669 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:02,050 Ms. Klinsky? 670 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:02,050 Yeah. 671 00:14:02,092 --> 00:14:04,344 She was like 50. 672 00:14:02,092 --> 00:14:04,344 Yeah, she looked 673 00:14:02,092 --> 00:14:04,344 good for her age. 674 00:14:04,386 --> 00:14:05,804 She looked like 675 00:14:04,386 --> 00:14:05,804 Rick Moranis. 676 00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:07,431 Moranis was always in 677 00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:07,431 pretty good shape, yeah. 678 00:14:07,472 --> 00:14:08,724 Plus, when she took 679 00:14:07,472 --> 00:14:08,724 her hair out of the bun, 680 00:14:08,766 --> 00:14:11,101 she went from 681 00:14:08,766 --> 00:14:11,101 Moranis to Alanis. 682 00:14:11,142 --> 00:14:12,728 Gross. You were 14. 683 00:14:12,770 --> 00:14:14,688 So, technically, 684 00:14:12,770 --> 00:14:14,688 you were raped. 685 00:14:14,730 --> 00:14:17,524 It wasn't rape. 686 00:14:14,730 --> 00:14:17,524 Can't rape a guy. 687 00:14:14,730 --> 00:14:17,524 Huh? 688 00:14:17,566 --> 00:14:19,777 You can't rape... 689 00:14:17,566 --> 00:14:19,777 I was... I was willing. 690 00:14:19,818 --> 00:14:20,902 You know, you can't 691 00:14:19,818 --> 00:14:20,902 rape... I mean, it's cool. 692 00:14:20,944 --> 00:14:22,946 Like, I bedded an older 693 00:14:20,944 --> 00:14:22,946 woman. That's cool. 694 00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:25,907 Right, Grieco? 695 00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:25,907 You know what? 696 00:14:25,949 --> 00:14:28,118 Let me use your pain 697 00:14:25,949 --> 00:14:28,118 in the scene. 698 00:14:25,949 --> 00:14:28,118 What are you 699 00:14:25,949 --> 00:14:28,118 talking about? 700 00:14:28,159 --> 00:14:29,661 You can't use somebody 701 00:14:28,159 --> 00:14:29,661 else's pain, Grieco. 702 00:14:29,703 --> 00:14:31,455 Do you know how 703 00:14:29,703 --> 00:14:31,455 acting works? 704 00:14:31,496 --> 00:14:33,164 Look... (exhales) 705 00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:35,459 Touch my finger... 706 00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:38,920 and transfer your pain 707 00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:38,920 into me. 708 00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:38,920 DEE: Mm-hmm, it's a good idea. 709 00:14:38,962 --> 00:14:39,963 Touch... touch my finger. 710 00:14:38,962 --> 00:14:39,963 I'm not touching 711 00:14:38,962 --> 00:14:39,963 your finger, man. 712 00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:41,590 I'm not touching 713 00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:41,590 your finger! 714 00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:41,590 Dennis. 715 00:14:41,632 --> 00:14:44,092 Seriously, touch my finger. 716 00:14:41,632 --> 00:14:44,092 What the hell is...? 717 00:14:41,632 --> 00:14:44,092 You know what? 718 00:14:44,134 --> 00:14:45,927 Why don't you just shoot 719 00:14:44,134 --> 00:14:45,927 me doing the goddamn scene? 720 00:14:45,969 --> 00:14:47,929 I'll seduce 721 00:14:45,969 --> 00:14:47,929 the librarian. 722 00:14:47,971 --> 00:14:50,432 You know what? That seaweed's 723 00:14:47,971 --> 00:14:50,432 making me a little sick. 724 00:14:50,474 --> 00:14:53,184 Uh, can I get a chalk break 725 00:14:50,474 --> 00:14:53,184 or something like that? 726 00:14:50,474 --> 00:14:53,184 Uh-oh. 727 00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:54,686 ♪ ♪ 728 00:15:00,275 --> 00:15:03,903 I call this one 729 00:15:00,275 --> 00:15:03,903 "Dog Three-Way." 730 00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:06,239 'Cause I was recently 731 00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:06,239 in a dog three-way. 732 00:15:06,281 --> 00:15:08,533 Actually, four with 733 00:15:06,281 --> 00:15:08,533 me, so, four-way. 734 00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:10,702 I was in a dog orgy. 735 00:15:10,744 --> 00:15:12,746 God, he's making a mockery 736 00:15:10,744 --> 00:15:12,746 of my art, bro. 737 00:15:12,788 --> 00:15:13,664 Oh. 738 00:15:12,788 --> 00:15:13,664 DENNIS: 739 00:15:12,788 --> 00:15:13,664 Well, 740 00:15:13,705 --> 00:15:14,956 the shoot was 741 00:15:13,705 --> 00:15:14,956 a total disaster. 742 00:15:14,998 --> 00:15:17,250 Dee's incompetent 743 00:15:14,998 --> 00:15:17,250 and a bitch, which we all knew. 744 00:15:17,292 --> 00:15:18,960 But, I mean, Richard Grieco. 745 00:15:19,002 --> 00:15:20,253 The man is obsessed 746 00:15:19,002 --> 00:15:20,253 with seaweed. It's... 747 00:15:20,295 --> 00:15:22,673 Pump your brakes. 748 00:15:20,295 --> 00:15:22,673 You met Grieco? 749 00:15:22,714 --> 00:15:24,966 Yeah, I met Grieco. 750 00:15:22,714 --> 00:15:24,966 Yeah, he-he was in my movie, 751 00:15:25,008 --> 00:15:26,343 but, uh, it didn't go very well. 752 00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:27,761 What-what are you doing? 753 00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:27,761 Are you doing a Grieco thing? 754 00:15:27,803 --> 00:15:30,054 Yeah, I'm doing a Grieco thing, 755 00:15:27,803 --> 00:15:30,054 'cause-'cause Grieco's the man. 756 00:15:30,096 --> 00:15:32,307 You know, is he the man? 757 00:15:30,096 --> 00:15:32,307 No, not really. 758 00:15:32,349 --> 00:15:33,975 Ah, he's not the man? 759 00:15:32,349 --> 00:15:33,975 No, he's, he's-- yeah, no. 760 00:15:34,017 --> 00:15:36,687 Hello, boys. 761 00:15:36,728 --> 00:15:38,605 Is that how you played it? 762 00:15:36,728 --> 00:15:38,605 That is way over the top. 763 00:15:38,647 --> 00:15:41,650 What are you talking about? This 764 00:15:38,647 --> 00:15:41,650 is it. This is the way they are. 765 00:15:41,692 --> 00:15:46,571 Frank, did you buy 766 00:15:41,692 --> 00:15:46,571 an air conditioner? 767 00:15:41,692 --> 00:15:46,571 Yes, and 768 00:15:41,692 --> 00:15:46,571 I bought a painting for $35K. 769 00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:49,574 Why? 770 00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:49,574 Because I liked it, 771 00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:49,574 and that's what it cost. 772 00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:51,075 Is nobody understanding 773 00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:51,075 what we're trying to do? 774 00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:51,075 (door opens, closes) 775 00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:52,994 I am trying to prove 776 00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:52,994 that this is all bullshit, 777 00:15:53,036 --> 00:15:55,497 and you guys are all 778 00:15:53,036 --> 00:15:55,497 buying into it. 779 00:15:55,539 --> 00:15:56,915 Oh. Oh, ho, ho, ho. 780 00:15:55,539 --> 00:15:56,915 Oh, hi. 781 00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:59,167 Hi. 782 00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:59,167 Here's the darling. 783 00:15:59,209 --> 00:16:01,545 Oh. 784 00:15:59,209 --> 00:16:01,545 That sold me... 785 00:16:01,586 --> 00:16:03,839 not a painting. 786 00:16:03,881 --> 00:16:05,549 Mm. 787 00:16:03,881 --> 00:16:05,549 A revelation. 788 00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,467 Oh. Hi, Ango. 789 00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,467 Oh, oh. 790 00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:08,385 WOMAN: 791 00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:08,385 Mm. (laughing) 792 00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:08,385 Oh. Oh, great. 793 00:16:08,426 --> 00:16:10,011 Oh, thank you. 794 00:16:08,426 --> 00:16:10,011 Thank you, Ango. 795 00:16:10,053 --> 00:16:11,388 Yes. 796 00:16:10,053 --> 00:16:11,388 Thank you 797 00:16:10,053 --> 00:16:11,388 very much. 798 00:16:11,429 --> 00:16:13,014 And thank you 799 00:16:11,429 --> 00:16:13,014 for coming. 800 00:16:11,429 --> 00:16:13,014 Oh. Oh, 801 00:16:11,429 --> 00:16:13,014 my pleasure. 802 00:16:13,056 --> 00:16:15,183 Yes, we have... we 803 00:16:13,056 --> 00:16:15,183 have many paintings by 804 00:16:15,225 --> 00:16:17,394 our featured artist, 805 00:16:15,225 --> 00:16:17,394 Rickety Cricket. 806 00:16:15,225 --> 00:16:17,394 Ah... 807 00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:18,645 Okay, well, Ango 808 00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:18,645 clearly has a great eye. 809 00:16:18,687 --> 00:16:19,646 I do have 810 00:16:18,687 --> 00:16:19,646 a great eye. 811 00:16:19,688 --> 00:16:21,565 So I'm excited 812 00:16:19,688 --> 00:16:21,565 to see what you have. 813 00:16:21,606 --> 00:16:23,983 Yes, yes. Well, here 814 00:16:21,606 --> 00:16:23,983 we have a Cricket. 815 00:16:24,025 --> 00:16:26,152 Oh. 816 00:16:26,194 --> 00:16:29,489 Yes, yes, and, uh, here 817 00:16:26,194 --> 00:16:29,489 we have another Cricket. 818 00:16:29,531 --> 00:16:31,366 Uh-huh. 819 00:16:29,531 --> 00:16:31,366 And, uh... 820 00:16:31,408 --> 00:16:33,034 Oh, here we have 821 00:16:31,408 --> 00:16:33,034 the artist himself. 822 00:16:33,076 --> 00:16:35,662 This is Rickety Cricket. 823 00:16:33,076 --> 00:16:35,662 Hey-o. 824 00:16:35,704 --> 00:16:39,207 Wow. 825 00:16:35,704 --> 00:16:39,207 Yeah, he literally 826 00:16:35,704 --> 00:16:39,207 has the worst life imaginable. 827 00:16:39,249 --> 00:16:40,041 (laughing): 828 00:16:39,249 --> 00:16:40,041 He ain't lying. 829 00:16:40,083 --> 00:16:42,043 So now you got some perspective 830 00:16:42,085 --> 00:16:43,294 and some context. 831 00:16:42,085 --> 00:16:43,294 Uh-huh. 832 00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:45,839 And like a story or whatever 833 00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:45,839 it is that you people need, 834 00:16:45,881 --> 00:16:47,006 so... 835 00:16:45,881 --> 00:16:47,006 Uh-huh. 836 00:16:47,048 --> 00:16:48,633 We don't have 837 00:16:47,048 --> 00:16:48,633 to talk numbers right now, 838 00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:51,177 but I feel like it should be... 839 00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:51,177 DEE: Hey, guys. 840 00:16:51,219 --> 00:16:53,513 I figured this art opening 841 00:16:51,219 --> 00:16:53,513 would be the perfect place 842 00:16:53,555 --> 00:16:56,600 to premiere 843 00:16:53,555 --> 00:16:56,600 my directorial debut. 844 00:16:56,641 --> 00:16:58,059 No, Dee, absolutely not. 845 00:16:58,101 --> 00:17:00,103 That's a hard "no." 846 00:16:58,101 --> 00:17:00,103 MAC: 847 00:16:58,101 --> 00:17:00,103 Yeah. 848 00:17:00,144 --> 00:17:02,689 (piano plays gentle melody) 849 00:17:02,731 --> 00:17:05,191 (orchestra joins in) 850 00:17:19,414 --> 00:17:21,082 DENNIS: 851 00:17:19,414 --> 00:17:21,082 Oh, come on. There were... 852 00:17:21,124 --> 00:17:22,918 No, Dee. 853 00:17:21,124 --> 00:17:22,918 This is ridiculous. 854 00:17:22,960 --> 00:17:25,128 ♪ ♪ 855 00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:42,771 (orchestra plays upbeat, 856 00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:42,771 fast-paced music) 857 00:17:44,481 --> 00:17:46,900 Hey, hoser, remember when 858 00:17:44,481 --> 00:17:46,900 I raped you in the library? 859 00:17:46,942 --> 00:17:50,528 Hoser, hoser, hoser, hoser, 860 00:17:46,942 --> 00:17:50,528 hoser, hoser, hoser... 861 00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:52,530 Okay, thank you. Thank you very 862 00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:52,530 much. I'm sorry. That was, uh... 863 00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:54,491 That's not part 864 00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:54,491 of the, uh, whole thing. 865 00:17:54,532 --> 00:17:58,119 It's very disturbing. 866 00:17:54,532 --> 00:17:58,119 It's very avant-garde. 867 00:17:58,161 --> 00:17:59,162 Mm-hmm. 868 00:17:58,161 --> 00:17:59,162 What do 869 00:17:58,161 --> 00:17:59,162 you think it's all worth? 870 00:17:59,203 --> 00:18:01,665 Good question. 871 00:17:59,203 --> 00:18:01,665 Ango, what do you think? 872 00:18:01,706 --> 00:18:03,875 Millions. 873 00:18:03,917 --> 00:18:06,252 I'd trade my 874 00:18:03,917 --> 00:18:06,252 limbs for it. 875 00:18:06,294 --> 00:18:10,089 Well, the market is dictated 876 00:18:06,294 --> 00:18:10,089 by what people will pay, so... 877 00:18:10,131 --> 00:18:13,134 Well, right, but how much 878 00:18:10,131 --> 00:18:13,134 are you willing to pay for it? 879 00:18:13,176 --> 00:18:15,136 Me? 880 00:18:13,176 --> 00:18:15,136 Yeah. 881 00:18:15,178 --> 00:18:16,179 (laughs) 882 00:18:15,178 --> 00:18:16,179 Oh, no, no. 883 00:18:16,220 --> 00:18:19,182 I'm really not interested 884 00:18:16,220 --> 00:18:19,182 in buying anything. 885 00:18:19,223 --> 00:18:21,100 But you own 886 00:18:19,223 --> 00:18:21,100 an art gallery. 887 00:18:21,142 --> 00:18:22,644 Oh, no. Oh. 888 00:18:22,686 --> 00:18:24,354 I rent an art gallery, 889 00:18:24,395 --> 00:18:26,648 or more accurately, 890 00:18:24,395 --> 00:18:26,648 my parents rent one for me. 891 00:18:26,690 --> 00:18:28,149 What?! 892 00:18:28,191 --> 00:18:31,069 So that painting I bought 893 00:18:28,191 --> 00:18:31,069 from you was worthless? 894 00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,362 Of course not. 895 00:18:32,403 --> 00:18:33,655 It meant something to you. 896 00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:35,740 It's worth 897 00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:35,740 exactly what you paid. 898 00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:38,159 I want to 899 00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:38,159 sell it back. 900 00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:38,159 Okay. 901 00:18:38,201 --> 00:18:39,870 In that exchange, 902 00:18:38,201 --> 00:18:39,870 it would only be worth 903 00:18:39,911 --> 00:18:43,957 what I would pay for it, 904 00:18:39,911 --> 00:18:43,957 which is, again, um, nothing. 905 00:18:43,999 --> 00:18:44,916 I-I don't get it. 906 00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:46,292 When is stuff art? 907 00:18:46,334 --> 00:18:50,005 Uh, hey, guys, 908 00:18:46,334 --> 00:18:50,005 guys, um, if I may, 909 00:18:50,047 --> 00:18:52,173 I think I can 910 00:18:50,047 --> 00:18:52,173 sum this all up. 911 00:18:52,215 --> 00:18:53,466 You see, art 912 00:18:53,508 --> 00:18:55,426 is an ambiguous thing, yeah? 913 00:18:55,468 --> 00:18:57,929 Yeah, just because you make 914 00:18:55,468 --> 00:18:57,929 some art, it doesn't mean 915 00:18:57,971 --> 00:19:00,181 that you're an artist. 916 00:19:00,223 --> 00:19:02,726 But, also, it does mean 917 00:19:00,223 --> 00:19:02,726 you're an artist. 918 00:19:02,767 --> 00:19:04,519 But does it mean 919 00:19:02,767 --> 00:19:04,519 that that art 920 00:19:04,561 --> 00:19:06,980 is good art? 921 00:19:07,022 --> 00:19:11,275 Is art good just because 922 00:19:07,022 --> 00:19:11,275 the right people say it's good? 923 00:19:11,317 --> 00:19:13,737 Yes. Yes. 924 00:19:13,778 --> 00:19:15,363 That's-that's how it works. 925 00:19:15,405 --> 00:19:16,823 Yeah, but keep in mind, 926 00:19:15,405 --> 00:19:16,823 you know, 927 00:19:16,865 --> 00:19:18,658 a lot of modern art is... 928 00:19:16,865 --> 00:19:18,658 is trash. 929 00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:20,159 I mean, it's shitty. 930 00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:20,159 It's not... 931 00:19:20,201 --> 00:19:22,161 You know, it's not good. 932 00:19:20,201 --> 00:19:22,161 It's terrible. 933 00:19:22,203 --> 00:19:24,622 You know? And yet, 934 00:19:22,203 --> 00:19:24,622 it's a fine line 935 00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:27,125 between Van Gogh and Van Damme, 936 00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,377 you know, 937 00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,377 between Depp and Grieco, 938 00:19:29,419 --> 00:19:32,005 between Banksy and Charlie, 939 00:19:32,047 --> 00:19:34,049 that makes it very difficult to 940 00:19:32,047 --> 00:19:34,049 determine what's good art. 941 00:19:34,091 --> 00:19:35,258 You know, what's high art? 942 00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:37,218 What has worth? 943 00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:37,218 What has meaning? 944 00:19:37,260 --> 00:19:38,887 Yeah? 945 00:19:38,929 --> 00:19:40,638 But if one thing 946 00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,934 has become abundantly clear 947 00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,934 to me today-- 948 00:19:43,975 --> 00:19:48,229 and it should be to all of you, 949 00:19:43,975 --> 00:19:48,229 as well-- 950 00:19:48,271 --> 00:19:50,857 is that I wasn't raped. 951 00:19:52,067 --> 00:19:54,861 We had a good time, she and I. 952 00:19:54,903 --> 00:19:57,238 Yeah. It was a... 953 00:19:54,903 --> 00:19:57,238 it was a two-way road. 954 00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:59,824 The whole thing was... mutual. 955 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:05,705 And the woman in no way 956 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:05,705 looked like Rick Moranis. 957 00:20:05,747 --> 00:20:07,916 You know? 958 00:20:07,958 --> 00:20:11,252 She totally did. I remember 959 00:20:07,958 --> 00:20:11,252 her. Remember her? 960 00:20:07,958 --> 00:20:11,252 Yeah. 961 00:20:11,294 --> 00:20:13,212 Um... 962 00:20:11,294 --> 00:20:13,212 Real dog. 963 00:20:11,294 --> 00:20:13,212 I wouldn't even sleep with her. 964 00:20:48,832 --> 00:20:50,291 (trumpet playing off-key) 965 00:20:50,333 --> 00:20:51,793 Brown. 966 00:20:51,835 --> 00:20:53,837 Captioned by 967 00:20:51,835 --> 00:20:53,837 Media Access Group at WGBH 56882