Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:05,910 --> 00:00:08,741
Man, I tell you, Pops outdid himself
2
00:00:08,742 --> 00:00:10,207
when He created catfish.
3
00:00:10,209 --> 00:00:13,077
I mean, some people refer
to them as bottom-feeders,
4
00:00:13,079 --> 00:00:16,414
but I refer to them
as down-bottom delicacy.
5
00:00:16,416 --> 00:00:17,748
Mmm, mmm, mmm!
6
00:00:17,750 --> 00:00:20,685
Hey, all I know is
His arch rival Lucifer
7
00:00:20,687 --> 00:00:24,622
outdid hisself with this
"That Damn Devil" hot sauce.
8
00:00:24,624 --> 00:00:27,075
He... he came up with this, babe.
9
00:00:27,099 --> 00:00:28,024
Boom.
10
00:00:28,025 --> 00:00:30,561
You do know that's just
a company and a mascot, right?
11
00:00:30,563 --> 00:00:33,431
I mean, "That Damn Devil"
ain't makin' no hot sauce.
12
00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:36,500
It was made with plants created
by Pops on the fifth day.
13
00:00:36,502 --> 00:00:40,037
All I know is this is the most
delicious, hottest sauce ever.
14
00:00:40,039 --> 00:00:42,039
And you can't find it everywhere.
15
00:00:42,041 --> 00:00:44,508
That's why a nigga
keeps his own bottle with him.
16
00:00:44,510 --> 00:00:45,710
Exclusive.
17
00:00:45,712 --> 00:00:47,695
Boy, is it.
18
00:00:49,648 --> 00:00:51,382
Hey, you notice Lloyd
been acting funny lately?
19
00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:54,786
Oh, he's just mad 'cause
he can't get drunk no more.
20
00:00:54,788 --> 00:00:56,587
I told him it wasn't even on me.
21
00:00:56,589 --> 00:00:58,789
Over there mad-doggin' and stuff.
22
00:00:58,791 --> 00:01:01,325
He know I still love his ass.
Ain't that right, Lloyd?
23
00:01:01,327 --> 00:01:04,194
Did my ex-Lord and no-longer-my-savior
24
00:01:04,196 --> 00:01:06,263
say something?
25
00:01:06,265 --> 00:01:08,933
Oh! Boon! My P.O.
26
00:01:08,935 --> 00:01:10,268
You got Shalinka's keys?
27
00:01:10,270 --> 00:01:11,602
- Oh, yeah. I'm on it.
- Come on, come on!
28
00:01:11,604 --> 00:01:13,337
I got to go! I got to go!
29
00:01:13,339 --> 00:01:15,790
Oh. Hold up.
30
00:01:20,614 --> 00:01:22,413
Hey. Where that Devil?
31
00:01:22,415 --> 00:01:24,548
I don't know. I think
you put it in your pocket.
32
00:01:24,550 --> 00:01:26,284
Probably fell out them baggy-ass
33
00:01:26,286 --> 00:01:27,885
track pants you got on. Heh, heh.
34
00:01:27,887 --> 00:01:31,022
Come on, Boon!
We gonna be late, dawg! Come on!
35
00:01:31,024 --> 00:01:32,957
Damn.
36
00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:35,092
Why you wearin' track pants, anyway?
37
00:01:35,094 --> 00:01:37,695
That's for runnin' niggas,
not no damn wobblin'-ass niggas.
38
00:01:37,697 --> 00:01:40,114
Heh, heh, heh.
39
00:01:47,574 --> 00:01:49,240
Mmm!
40
00:01:49,242 --> 00:01:52,093
Man. That Damn Devil ain't shit.
41
00:01:53,446 --> 00:01:55,163
Ah. It's all right.
42
00:01:55,862 --> 00:02:02,112
Subtitle sync and corrections by
awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com.
43
00:02:23,743 --> 00:02:26,744
I am here to make a difference.
44
00:02:26,746 --> 00:02:28,413
To help people.
45
00:02:28,415 --> 00:02:30,014
I can make a difference.
46
00:02:30,016 --> 00:02:31,882
My job is a privilege,
47
00:02:31,884 --> 00:02:33,484
and I am so grateful
for my profession.
48
00:02:33,486 --> 00:02:36,838
People pray every day
to have a job like mine.
49
00:02:38,491 --> 00:02:39,824
Today's gonna be a good day.
50
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,959
Man, you just a punk-ass P.O.
51
00:02:41,961 --> 00:02:44,561
You violatin' me? Why?
52
00:02:44,563 --> 00:02:45,963
The assault charge.
53
00:02:45,965 --> 00:02:48,966
I know where you
and your boy band live, bitch.
54
00:02:48,968 --> 00:02:52,036
- Where do I live?
- 112 North Roscoe.
55
00:02:52,038 --> 00:02:55,373
Okay, that's... that's where I live.
56
00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:58,709
You tested positive for...
57
00:02:58,711 --> 00:03:00,461
everything.
58
00:03:01,247 --> 00:03:03,714
I... have...
59
00:03:03,716 --> 00:03:05,500
AIDS?
60
00:03:06,653 --> 00:03:08,586
I... No. Or I don't know.
61
00:03:08,588 --> 00:03:10,454
How did I get AIDS?!
62
00:03:10,456 --> 00:03:13,124
[BLEEP] this list!
"Think positive" bullshit.
63
00:03:13,126 --> 00:03:15,660
Who the [BLEEP] decides
to be a parole office, anyway,
64
00:03:15,662 --> 00:03:16,994
you [BLEEP] nerd?
65
00:03:16,996 --> 00:03:18,663
You ain't even a real cop, homey.
66
00:03:18,665 --> 00:03:22,333
Hope you choke on a bowl of
dicks and die, mother[BLEEP]
67
00:03:22,335 --> 00:03:24,802
Okay. Well,
thank you for the feedback.
68
00:03:24,804 --> 00:03:27,054
[BLEEP] you.
69
00:03:28,541 --> 00:03:30,408
Oh, God.
70
00:03:30,410 --> 00:03:32,343
Oh, Jesus.
71
00:03:32,345 --> 00:03:33,611
You called?
72
00:03:33,613 --> 00:03:36,213
Uh, no. I didn't. Uh...
73
00:03:36,215 --> 00:03:38,683
Are you smoking? No, um... never mind.
74
00:03:38,685 --> 00:03:40,017
Uh, please. Please, take a seat.
75
00:03:40,019 --> 00:03:41,285
Um, Mister, uh...?
76
00:03:41,287 --> 00:03:43,554
Christ. As in Jesus Christ.
77
00:03:43,556 --> 00:03:44,756
But you can call me Jee,
78
00:03:44,758 --> 00:03:46,691
big dawg in the robe,
the light supreme,
79
00:03:46,693 --> 00:03:50,828
Mister Turn-One-Fish-Into-5,000-
And-Feed-A-Whole-Family.
80
00:03:50,830 --> 00:03:52,363
It don't even matter what you call me,
81
00:03:52,365 --> 00:03:55,099
just as long as you call me.
And you just did.
82
00:03:55,101 --> 00:03:56,900
What's happening, pimp?
83
00:03:56,902 --> 00:03:59,703
Well, gee... zus.
84
00:03:59,705 --> 00:04:01,505
Um... my name's Tyler.
85
00:04:01,507 --> 00:04:03,374
Praise be to you. Um...
86
00:04:03,376 --> 00:04:05,309
- Let me find your file.
- Hey, look, look.
87
00:04:05,311 --> 00:04:09,446
How about we put that on hold
and we talk about your file?
88
00:04:09,448 --> 00:04:11,332
My file?
89
00:04:12,852 --> 00:04:15,920
Man, I know somebody
got that shit, man.
90
00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:17,455
Nothing got turned in.
91
00:04:17,457 --> 00:04:19,123
That phone's not coming back, Boonie.
92
00:04:19,125 --> 00:04:20,858
Damn. I liked that phone, man.
93
00:04:20,860 --> 00:04:23,193
That was the Kuba Flip 4.
94
00:04:23,195 --> 00:04:25,863
I can't figure out nothing
after the Kuba Flip 4.
95
00:04:25,865 --> 00:04:29,350
Psh, eBay. Here.
96
00:04:31,871 --> 00:04:33,737
Look.
97
00:04:33,739 --> 00:04:35,206
That's my phone!
98
00:04:35,208 --> 00:04:38,009
Oh, yeah. They got a bunch
of Kuba Flip 4's on here.
99
00:04:38,011 --> 00:04:41,079
Nah, look what I'm saying.
That's my actual phone.
100
00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:43,815
Look. That's my wallpaper.
101
00:04:43,817 --> 00:04:45,883
Is that a bottle of Darby?
102
00:04:45,885 --> 00:04:47,818
Lloyd!
103
00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:50,954
...and I keep reaching out, but it...
104
00:04:50,956 --> 00:04:52,557
it feels like no one's listening.
105
00:04:52,559 --> 00:04:55,827
Like this last guy, okay,
he wanted me to choke to death
106
00:04:55,829 --> 00:04:57,228
on a bowl of dicks.
107
00:04:57,230 --> 00:04:59,364
Some people need more motivation, man.
108
00:04:59,366 --> 00:05:02,633
But at the end of the day,
all that counts
109
00:05:02,635 --> 00:05:04,102
is what's in your heart.
110
00:05:04,104 --> 00:05:06,970
And as long as that's right,
Pops is with you.
111
00:05:06,972 --> 00:05:09,373
He riding with you,
and he gonna lead your way.
112
00:05:09,375 --> 00:05:11,776
But, uh, this New Compton Gardens,
113
00:05:11,778 --> 00:05:14,712
at this number, that's the best
place to reach you?
114
00:05:14,714 --> 00:05:16,113
That's the homeboy Boonie.
115
00:05:16,115 --> 00:05:18,316
Call that number any time.
I'm always with Boone.
116
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:20,251
He know how to get ahold of your boy.
117
00:05:20,253 --> 00:05:23,588
So, uh, Jesus has a son named Boonie?
118
00:05:23,590 --> 00:05:26,323
No! No kids for Jesus.
119
00:05:26,325 --> 00:05:29,127
Naw, Pops would kill me... again.
120
00:05:29,129 --> 00:05:32,263
And, for real, that wasn't
no fun the first time, pimp.
121
00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:36,000
How 'bout we just say this...
next time, [BLEEP] that kiosk.
122
00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:37,802
I'm just gonna come up in here
and holla at you.
123
00:05:37,804 --> 00:05:39,536
Cool?
124
00:05:39,538 --> 00:05:41,005
All right.
125
00:05:43,076 --> 00:05:45,526
Ooh! Okay.
126
00:05:48,147 --> 00:05:49,947
Hey, Louis! What's up, pimp?
127
00:05:49,949 --> 00:05:51,950
Hey, you better get that
cholesterol down
128
00:05:51,952 --> 00:05:53,283
or you gonna die, dawg!
129
00:05:56,156 --> 00:05:57,688
Damn, fool!
130
00:05:57,690 --> 00:05:59,424
- Huh?
- Hey [BLEEP] you!
131
00:05:59,426 --> 00:06:02,243
Christ lives matter, mother[BLEEP]
132
00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:37,728
Ohh, man.
133
00:06:37,730 --> 00:06:40,531
I shoulda known. I shoulda known.
134
00:06:40,533 --> 00:06:43,601
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
135
00:06:43,603 --> 00:06:45,286
Yep.
136
00:06:59,018 --> 00:07:01,018
Oh, this fool here...
137
00:07:01,020 --> 00:07:03,421
He's stealing stuff!
138
00:07:07,293 --> 00:07:10,962
Man, what the hell?
139
00:07:10,964 --> 00:07:13,648
What's this? This...
140
00:07:15,634 --> 00:07:19,837
Oh, this mother[BLEEP] This mother...
141
00:07:28,781 --> 00:07:31,182
Tyler!
142
00:07:31,184 --> 00:07:33,117
What's happening, pimp?
143
00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:35,252
I mean, that's a dedicated
P.O. right there,
144
00:07:35,254 --> 00:07:36,788
you know what I'm talkin' about?
145
00:07:36,790 --> 00:07:39,123
The boy making house calls and things.
146
00:07:39,125 --> 00:07:41,792
Hey, so to what do I owe
the honor, pimp?
147
00:07:41,794 --> 00:07:43,995
Uh, look...
148
00:07:43,997 --> 00:07:45,863
I believe you.
149
00:07:45,865 --> 00:07:47,064
What you talking about, pimp?
150
00:07:47,066 --> 00:07:49,933
I believe you're Jesus.
151
00:07:49,935 --> 00:07:51,135
I-I-I saw you get hit by that car
152
00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:52,336
when you were leaving the office.
153
00:07:52,338 --> 00:07:54,538
Oh, snap! You saw that, huh?
154
00:07:54,540 --> 00:07:56,007
- Yeah.
- You saw that, right?
155
00:07:56,009 --> 00:07:57,542
- Yeah.
- Pops is dope, right?
156
00:07:57,544 --> 00:07:58,676
Yeah, I...
157
00:07:58,678 --> 00:08:00,210
Actually, I kind of feel
like this changes
158
00:08:00,212 --> 00:08:01,879
the course of my life forever.
159
00:08:01,881 --> 00:08:03,414
It does, home-bolio!
160
00:08:03,416 --> 00:08:05,483
And your afterlife, too, pimp.
161
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:07,551
This here is cause for celebration.
162
00:08:07,553 --> 00:08:08,619
Yeah, okay.
163
00:08:08,621 --> 00:08:10,822
Smoke yours, man. You got some weed?
164
00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:13,624
Oh, no. Uh, not, uh...
not on me. I'm at work.
165
00:08:13,626 --> 00:08:15,893
- You got some cash?
- Yeah. Yeah, I got cash.
166
00:08:15,895 --> 00:08:17,094
Come on. Let's get some weed.
167
00:08:17,096 --> 00:08:19,380
Uh, okay.
168
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:24,502
Are you sure this is all right?
169
00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:27,304
Like, just socializing
with your clients like this?
170
00:08:27,306 --> 00:08:28,640
Who knows?
171
00:08:29,909 --> 00:08:32,110
It's fine. Uh... I don't know.
172
00:08:32,112 --> 00:08:35,513
I just...
I really want you to meet him.
173
00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:36,847
Okay.
174
00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:39,250
Okay. I just...
175
00:08:39,252 --> 00:08:42,453
I'm still wrapping
my head around this.
176
00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:46,057
But I love you,
and if it's important to you,
177
00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:48,059
- then I want to explore it with you.
- Thank you, sweetie.
178
00:08:48,061 --> 00:08:49,927
- Okay?
- Mm-hmm. Okay.
179
00:08:49,929 --> 00:08:52,547
Oh. I'll get it.
180
00:08:55,068 --> 00:08:58,336
Cassandra! So nice to...
181
00:08:58,338 --> 00:08:59,537
- Oh...
- Oh, okay.
182
00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:00,938
- So nice to meet you!
- Yeah.
183
00:09:00,940 --> 00:09:04,208
Well, I already know you,
'cause I am Jesus, you dig?
184
00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:05,543
Tyler, what's happening?
185
00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:08,212
I see you up in here
living like a boss, pimp.
186
00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:09,480
- Come here. Give it to me.
- Okay.
187
00:09:09,482 --> 00:09:11,682
- Give it to me.
- Oh-kay! Oh, yeah.
188
00:09:11,684 --> 00:09:13,751
What's up? How you been, playboy?
189
00:09:13,753 --> 00:09:14,953
I'm good. Right, hon?
190
00:09:14,955 --> 00:09:17,154
Yeah.
191
00:09:17,156 --> 00:09:20,157
The Kuba people of the Congo!
192
00:09:20,159 --> 00:09:21,826
That one is sweet.
193
00:09:21,828 --> 00:09:24,963
You got so many dope African artifacts
194
00:09:24,965 --> 00:09:26,364
and souvenirs in here...
195
00:09:26,366 --> 00:09:27,765
Ooh, I really dig that
196
00:09:27,767 --> 00:09:29,700
from all your travels to our Africa.
197
00:09:29,702 --> 00:09:32,637
'Cause I know you went down
there, and you fed the hungry,
198
00:09:32,639 --> 00:09:35,506
you dig, and you also helped
feed and clothe
199
00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:37,442
the homeless brothers
and sisters down there.
200
00:09:37,444 --> 00:09:39,911
I really appreciate that.
Girl, give me some.
201
00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:42,113
Give me some. Yeah, that's what
I'm talking about.
202
00:09:42,115 --> 00:09:44,115
And that's why I knew you
wouldn't trip if I brought
203
00:09:44,117 --> 00:09:45,717
one of my poor, unfed partners with me
204
00:09:45,719 --> 00:09:47,318
to celebrate this occasion with us.
205
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:49,253
Tyler, Cassandra, this is Boonie.
206
00:09:49,255 --> 00:09:51,455
Boonie, this is my parole
officer, Tyler,
207
00:09:51,457 --> 00:09:53,524
and his girl, Cassandra,
who's really into the
208
00:09:53,526 --> 00:09:56,193
whole Africa, feed-the-world thing.
209
00:09:56,195 --> 00:09:58,262
- Good lady.
- Anyway, hey. What's up.
210
00:09:58,264 --> 00:10:00,131
Can you point me to the bathroom?
211
00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:01,866
'Cause I got to take a shit real bad.
212
00:10:01,868 --> 00:10:04,669
I mean, I know we just met,
and I hate to walk right up
213
00:10:04,671 --> 00:10:07,271
into your house
and hit you with this bad news
214
00:10:07,273 --> 00:10:08,739
about tearing up your bathroom,
215
00:10:08,741 --> 00:10:10,741
but you know how it is. You know.
216
00:10:10,743 --> 00:10:13,611
Unless Jesus can make the shit
go away for a couple of hours,
217
00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:15,613
then I don't have
to use they bathroom?
218
00:10:17,750 --> 00:10:20,685
That's on Pops.
219
00:10:20,687 --> 00:10:23,938
Nope. I still got to shit.
220
00:10:25,991 --> 00:10:27,457
How long has he been in there?
221
00:10:27,459 --> 00:10:29,860
Is he ever coming out?
222
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:32,773
Boonie's a big-ass man.
223
00:10:32,774 --> 00:10:35,041
I mean, big man mean big turds.
224
00:10:35,043 --> 00:10:36,976
Plus, his diet is all [BLEEP] up.
225
00:10:36,978 --> 00:10:38,645
He been eating
a lot of fish sandwiches
226
00:10:38,647 --> 00:10:40,113
and gummy worms lately.
227
00:10:40,115 --> 00:10:41,514
That can't come out easy.
228
00:10:41,516 --> 00:10:42,916
Boy, hey.
229
00:10:42,918 --> 00:10:45,585
Well, y'all bathroom
like a damn resort.
230
00:10:45,587 --> 00:10:47,253
I couldn't just throw these back on
231
00:10:47,255 --> 00:10:50,591
and contaminate a clean ass
with some dirty drawers.
232
00:10:50,593 --> 00:10:53,994
Can I... Can I put these
in your washer? Ours is broke.
233
00:10:57,599 --> 00:11:00,601
Damn. Y'all got a lot of African shit.
234
00:11:00,603 --> 00:11:02,735
Well, I lived in Nairobi
for two years,
235
00:11:02,737 --> 00:11:05,138
and I have such a strong
interest in the culture.
236
00:11:05,140 --> 00:11:07,874
So... so we have all this stuff.
237
00:11:07,876 --> 00:11:10,476
Hey, so tell me something...
Does Africa stink?
238
00:11:10,478 --> 00:11:14,081
I'm just saying,
like, I always imagined Africa
239
00:11:14,083 --> 00:11:16,349
to be mustier than a mother[BLEEP]
240
00:11:16,351 --> 00:11:19,419
That is really offensive.
Africa is so beautiful.
241
00:11:19,421 --> 00:11:22,088
Oh, well, you know,
you can have it if you want it.
242
00:11:22,090 --> 00:11:23,690
Mother[BLEEP] like me,
I need some pavement
243
00:11:23,692 --> 00:11:25,025
to walk on you know?
244
00:11:25,027 --> 00:11:27,561
I can't... I can't [BLEEP]
with all that dirt
245
00:11:27,563 --> 00:11:29,629
and monkey shit.
246
00:11:29,631 --> 00:11:31,698
Hey, Tyler, I think it's cool
that your girl
247
00:11:31,700 --> 00:11:33,367
is into the negroid arts.
248
00:11:33,369 --> 00:11:35,235
You know, she gonna help me
find a white bitch.
249
00:11:35,237 --> 00:11:38,105
White bitches don't stress you out
250
00:11:38,107 --> 00:11:39,706
like Black women, you know?
251
00:11:39,708 --> 00:11:41,841
Man, you ever had any Black pussy?
252
00:11:41,843 --> 00:11:43,176
Uh...
253
00:11:43,178 --> 00:11:45,979
I... Well, I-I... I have, um, dated
254
00:11:45,981 --> 00:11:48,048
an African-American woman before.
255
00:11:48,050 --> 00:11:49,983
Hey, so look, which one you like
256
00:11:49,985 --> 00:11:51,651
going down on? Them or white bitches?
257
00:11:51,653 --> 00:11:53,120
You know, 'cause I'm just
trying to figure it out,
258
00:11:53,122 --> 00:11:55,121
'cause let me tell you,
them white bitches,
259
00:11:55,123 --> 00:11:56,390
they throw it back at you.
260
00:11:56,392 --> 00:11:58,391
Right in your mouth.
261
00:12:00,929 --> 00:12:02,930
What the [BLEEP] is your problem?
262
00:12:02,932 --> 00:12:07,134
Can you please stop saying
the word "white bitch"?
263
00:12:07,136 --> 00:12:08,668
Uh, Caucasian bitch.
264
00:12:08,670 --> 00:12:11,271
Just stop saying "bitch."
265
00:12:11,273 --> 00:12:15,008
You know what, Cassandra,
I don't like that word, either.
266
00:12:15,010 --> 00:12:16,610
Don't like it. Really don't.
267
00:12:16,612 --> 00:12:18,345
- It's actually deplorable.
- Oh.
268
00:12:18,347 --> 00:12:20,213
Well, you didn't seem
to have a problem with it
269
00:12:20,215 --> 00:12:24,017
when he said it about 18 times
in the last 31 seconds, so...
270
00:12:24,019 --> 00:12:26,620
I'm Jesus. I hear that type
of language all the time.
271
00:12:26,622 --> 00:12:27,954
Don't phase me, though.
272
00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:30,023
Oh, so blatant sexism
doesn't phase you?
273
00:12:30,025 --> 00:12:33,160
Saying an entire continent of
people stink doesn't phase you.
274
00:12:33,162 --> 00:12:35,695
You're supposed to be Jesus,
and you hang out
275
00:12:35,697 --> 00:12:38,632
with lowlifes like this?
276
00:12:38,634 --> 00:12:39,833
Exactly!
277
00:12:39,835 --> 00:12:41,501
Much love, brother.
278
00:12:41,503 --> 00:12:43,102
Good folks right here. Good people.
279
00:12:43,104 --> 00:12:45,505
I'm finna just go ahead
and roll this blunt.
280
00:12:45,507 --> 00:12:47,040
Ooh, twist a fat one.
281
00:12:47,042 --> 00:12:50,377
You are a disgusting, contemptible,
282
00:12:50,379 --> 00:12:55,249
deplorable, racist,
misogynist piece of human filth.
283
00:12:55,251 --> 00:12:57,251
Do you say that because
I'm Black or...
284
00:12:57,253 --> 00:12:59,586
Tyler, I want these people
the [BLEEP] out of my house!
285
00:12:59,588 --> 00:13:01,054
- So no white bitches?
- Go!
286
00:13:01,056 --> 00:13:02,723
Okay, Cassandra. God bless y'all.
287
00:13:02,725 --> 00:13:05,042
You got a beautiful home, though.
288
00:13:07,262 --> 00:13:10,397
No, no, no!
289
00:13:10,399 --> 00:13:14,067
My ill-gotten gains are gone!
290
00:13:14,069 --> 00:13:17,403
No! Oh, boy.
291
00:13:17,405 --> 00:13:20,540
Oh, Lord.
292
00:13:20,542 --> 00:13:22,342
Thou shalt not steal, Lloyd.
293
00:13:22,344 --> 00:13:25,945
You mean the way you stole the
joy of my drunken inebriation?
294
00:13:25,947 --> 00:13:28,281
Huh? Lookit, Jesus. Look at this.
295
00:13:28,283 --> 00:13:30,617
Look at this.
296
00:13:30,619 --> 00:13:33,286
No buzz. I can drink all I want.
297
00:13:33,288 --> 00:13:36,089
And that little petty-ass
thievery for re-sale,
298
00:13:36,091 --> 00:13:39,025
at least I felt I was trying
to do something for people.
299
00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:41,628
And my eBay merchant ratings,
300
00:13:41,630 --> 00:13:43,029
oh, it's really gonna eat shit.
301
00:13:43,031 --> 00:13:45,698
Eat shit! Eat shit!
302
00:13:45,700 --> 00:13:48,101
You know what that means? Eat shit!
303
00:13:48,103 --> 00:13:50,770
Eat shit, Jesus!
304
00:13:50,772 --> 00:13:52,372
Eat shit!
305
00:13:52,374 --> 00:13:56,043
So his grimy ass
was flipping it all on eBay
306
00:13:56,045 --> 00:13:58,845
and making a killing.
That's messed up.
307
00:13:58,847 --> 00:14:01,648
My stupid ass out here stealing rims.
308
00:14:01,650 --> 00:14:03,783
This must be where
the money really is.
309
00:14:03,785 --> 00:14:06,720
If dumb, drunk Lloyd can do it, I can.
310
00:14:06,722 --> 00:14:09,055
So, what you gonna do with it?
311
00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:11,791
Uh... finders, keepers.
312
00:14:11,793 --> 00:14:13,460
Hey, you want a jPad?
313
00:14:13,462 --> 00:14:15,245
Oh.
314
00:14:16,865 --> 00:14:18,665
Aren't you going to work?
Do you need to take a shower?
315
00:14:18,667 --> 00:14:22,869
I was just thinking, um...
316
00:14:22,871 --> 00:14:25,071
Maybe that job isn't for me.
317
00:14:25,073 --> 00:14:27,274
Is this about your "hood" Jesus?
318
00:14:27,276 --> 00:14:29,076
What the [BLEEP] is your problem?!
319
00:14:29,078 --> 00:14:30,944
Of all the made-up Jesuses,
you had to find
320
00:14:30,946 --> 00:14:33,013
the most [BLEEP] up one of all.
321
00:14:33,015 --> 00:14:36,216
And where's the proof, huh?
I didn't see any miracles.
322
00:14:36,218 --> 00:14:38,151
He is not a fake.
323
00:14:38,153 --> 00:14:40,687
And you know what, maybe...
maybe you are racist.
324
00:14:40,689 --> 00:14:43,290
Huh? Denying the Black son of God?
325
00:14:43,292 --> 00:14:45,825
You know what, I'm not gonna
force this on you any more.
326
00:14:45,827 --> 00:14:48,228
I will explore it on my own.
327
00:14:48,230 --> 00:14:50,364
I know what I saw.
328
00:14:50,366 --> 00:14:53,166
I saw a miracle!
329
00:15:04,713 --> 00:15:07,648
Fellas.
330
00:15:07,650 --> 00:15:09,916
Hey, Jesus, the white boy here, man.
331
00:15:09,918 --> 00:15:11,851
Hey, uh, I would offer you something,
332
00:15:11,853 --> 00:15:15,254
but we don't have things like food.
333
00:15:15,256 --> 00:15:17,057
Uh, you want a jPad?
334
00:15:17,059 --> 00:15:19,793
- Uh, yeah. Sure thing.
- All right.
335
00:15:19,795 --> 00:15:21,662
Last night was, uh, fun.
336
00:15:21,664 --> 00:15:24,664
But did Cassandra
have a good time, though?
337
00:15:24,666 --> 00:15:26,600
Hey, she a solid young lady, man.
338
00:15:26,602 --> 00:15:28,201
You better keep her on your team.
339
00:15:28,203 --> 00:15:31,137
Plus, she know all about
the motherland.
340
00:15:31,139 --> 00:15:32,939
Yeah. Um... matter of fact,
341
00:15:32,941 --> 00:15:35,876
I might need
to crash here a few nights,
342
00:15:35,878 --> 00:15:37,210
if that's all right with you guys.
343
00:15:37,212 --> 00:15:38,345
Oh, man, for sure.
344
00:15:38,347 --> 00:15:41,147
You already know, man,
that's nothing, man.
345
00:15:41,149 --> 00:15:43,083
Check it out.
It be like that sometimes.
346
00:15:43,085 --> 00:15:45,619
Look, mi casa es su casa.
347
00:15:45,621 --> 00:15:47,688
Well, Boonie casa is su casa.
348
00:15:47,690 --> 00:15:50,223
You get it, pimp.
349
00:15:50,225 --> 00:15:51,425
Uh...
350
00:15:51,427 --> 00:15:53,293
Listen, Jesus.
351
00:15:53,295 --> 00:15:55,695
I was thinking, and...
352
00:15:55,697 --> 00:15:57,497
I'm ready to commit.
353
00:15:57,499 --> 00:16:00,701
To... To this. To you.
354
00:16:00,703 --> 00:16:02,969
I want to love life, too.
355
00:16:02,971 --> 00:16:04,705
That's what I'm talking about.
356
00:16:04,707 --> 00:16:06,573
Well, let's find it, then, pimp!
357
00:16:06,575 --> 00:16:08,976
Hey, look, me and Boonie was
just about to go to the store
358
00:16:08,978 --> 00:16:10,911
to get some more blunts and libations.
359
00:16:10,913 --> 00:16:13,380
Man, we about to light
this mother[BLEEP] up!
360
00:16:13,382 --> 00:16:15,048
Smoke! Take it in.
361
00:16:15,050 --> 00:16:17,850
Feel God's love
all through your lungs.
362
00:16:17,852 --> 00:16:20,654
Breathe in love. Breathe out the hate.
363
00:16:28,731 --> 00:16:30,514
Feel it. Hit it.
364
00:16:33,068 --> 00:16:35,552
You feel God's love?
365
00:16:35,938 --> 00:16:37,870
Pass me my shit, man.
You holdin' it too long.
366
00:16:37,872 --> 00:16:39,473
Sorry.
367
00:16:45,614 --> 00:16:47,814
Morning, pimp!
368
00:16:47,816 --> 00:16:49,282
What's happenin'?
369
00:16:50,418 --> 00:16:51,751
Morning.
370
00:16:51,753 --> 00:16:54,888
I had this dream
we were dodging gunshots
371
00:16:54,890 --> 00:16:57,090
in a car chase with the cops.
372
00:16:57,092 --> 00:16:58,825
For some reason, they only let us go
373
00:16:58,827 --> 00:17:00,227
after they took my pants.
374
00:17:00,229 --> 00:17:03,163
Them cops, they really dug
them trousers, dawg.
375
00:17:03,165 --> 00:17:05,632
I'm telling you, pimp,
376
00:17:05,634 --> 00:17:07,167
this life ain't for everybody.
377
00:17:07,169 --> 00:17:10,036
But we did get to save
some souls last night...
378
00:17:10,038 --> 00:17:13,573
Yes, we did... in a major way.
379
00:17:13,575 --> 00:17:16,843
Hey, new guy!
Feel like making a coffee run?
380
00:17:31,059 --> 00:17:33,060
You stole my jPad, [BLEEP]
381
00:17:33,062 --> 00:17:34,728
What? Whoa! I did not!
382
00:17:34,730 --> 00:17:36,997
Get him!
383
00:17:36,999 --> 00:17:39,333
Stop! Stop! I'm sorry!
384
00:17:39,335 --> 00:17:40,934
Jesus! [BLEEP]
385
00:17:43,472 --> 00:17:45,405
Why did you guys give me
a stolen jPad?
386
00:17:45,407 --> 00:17:47,474
That "find my phone" app
nearly cost me my life.
387
00:17:47,476 --> 00:17:49,743
Man, you just scared
this condom off me.
388
00:17:49,745 --> 00:17:51,211
And I didn't steal it!
389
00:17:51,213 --> 00:17:54,882
I-I got the stash of the person
who did steal it.
390
00:17:54,884 --> 00:17:56,550
And where's my coffee?
391
00:17:56,552 --> 00:18:00,353
Coffee?! No. No, no, no, no, no.
This is crazy.
392
00:18:00,355 --> 00:18:02,822
I-I don't get it.
Why do you guys do this?
393
00:18:02,824 --> 00:18:04,223
What is the point?
394
00:18:04,225 --> 00:18:06,426
We ask ourselves that all the time.
395
00:18:06,428 --> 00:18:08,428
But it's supposed to pay off one day.
396
00:18:08,430 --> 00:18:10,697
And it will. It paid off for Fish.
397
00:18:10,699 --> 00:18:13,433
It paid off for Maggie.
It paid off for Trayvon.
398
00:18:13,435 --> 00:18:16,102
They all went on
to better lives through me.
399
00:18:16,104 --> 00:18:18,105
It pays every day for eternity
400
00:18:18,107 --> 00:18:21,174
to stay down with your
Heavenly Father, pimp.
401
00:18:21,176 --> 00:18:23,643
Basically, when you're dead.
402
00:18:23,645 --> 00:18:25,178
I can't wait that long.
403
00:18:25,180 --> 00:18:29,449
Tyler, Pops works through us all
in mysterious ways.
404
00:18:29,451 --> 00:18:31,985
And, by the way,
He told me He already gave you
405
00:18:31,987 --> 00:18:34,187
the tools it takes
to be great at that job
406
00:18:34,189 --> 00:18:35,522
and change the world.
407
00:18:35,524 --> 00:18:38,408
All you got to do
is trust your instincts.
408
00:18:39,928 --> 00:18:42,529
Baby, if the Black Jesus
has helped you see
409
00:18:42,531 --> 00:18:46,799
that you can make a real
difference at your job, then...
410
00:18:46,801 --> 00:18:48,802
I guess I was wrong about him.
411
00:18:51,740 --> 00:18:54,424
Meghann, send in my first.
412
00:18:55,877 --> 00:18:57,610
Hey, hey. Hold up, cuz.
413
00:18:57,612 --> 00:18:59,563
Let me at him real quick.
414
00:19:02,751 --> 00:19:04,418
Hey, Tyler.
415
00:19:04,420 --> 00:19:05,885
I was all wrong, homey.
416
00:19:05,887 --> 00:19:07,554
All that "think positive" nonsense
417
00:19:07,556 --> 00:19:10,023
landed my Black ass a job, homey.
418
00:19:10,025 --> 00:19:11,491
It did?
419
00:19:11,493 --> 00:19:13,694
That's great!
420
00:19:13,696 --> 00:19:15,428
Uh, what are... what are you doing?
421
00:19:15,430 --> 00:19:17,964
Beating up mother[BLEEP]
at the Glam Gam Bikini Bar
422
00:19:17,966 --> 00:19:19,432
if they [BLEEP] with the girls.
423
00:19:19,434 --> 00:19:22,703
Bitches really appreciate my ass now.
424
00:19:22,705 --> 00:19:25,155
'Cause of your ass!
425
00:19:26,642 --> 00:19:28,642
Hey, come here, homey.
426
00:19:28,644 --> 00:19:29,776
Hey.
427
00:19:29,778 --> 00:19:32,646
You see this white...
428
00:19:32,648 --> 00:19:33,914
this dude right here?
429
00:19:33,916 --> 00:19:36,316
Listen to him. He'll set you straight.
430
00:19:36,318 --> 00:19:37,918
All right.
431
00:19:37,920 --> 00:19:40,537
You're still a [BLEEP] nerd.
432
00:19:46,861 --> 00:19:48,261
Thanks, Jesus.
433
00:19:48,263 --> 00:19:50,580
The name's Jesus.
434
00:19:55,275 --> 00:20:01,275
Subtitle sync and corrections by
awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com.
31290
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Filipino
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Interlingua
Irish
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romansh
Russian
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof
