Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:47,959
Shrek 2001 English
2
00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:52,839
[ MAN ] Once upon a time
there was a lovely princess.
3
00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:56,679
But she had an enchantment
upon her of a fearful sort...
4
00:00:56,760 --> 00:01:01,639
which could only be broken
by love's first kiss.
5
00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:04,059
She was locked away
in a castle...
6
00:01:04,140 --> 00:01:08,359
guarded by a terrible
fire-breathing dragon.
7
00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:12,819
Many brave knights had attempted
to free her from this dreadful prison,
8
00:01:12,900 --> 00:01:15,649
but none prevailed.
9
00:01:15,740 --> 00:01:17,909
She waited in
the dragon's keep...
10
00:01:17,990 --> 00:01:20,909
in the highest room
of the tallest tower...
11
00:01:20,990 --> 00:01:25,539
for her true love
and true love's first kiss.
12
00:01:25,620 --> 00:01:28,579
[ LAUGHING ]
Like that's ever gonna happen.
13
00:01:28,670 --> 00:01:32,419
- [ PAPER RUSTLING, TOILET FLUSHES ]
- What a load of...
14
00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:37,089
♪ Somebody once told me ♪
♪ the world is gonna roll me ♪
15
00:01:37,180 --> 00:01:41,139
♪ I am not the sharpest tool ♪
♪ in the shed ♪
16
00:01:41,220 --> 00:01:46,139
♪ She was looking kind of dumb ♪
♪ with her finger and her thumb ♪
17
00:01:46,230 --> 00:01:49,939
♪ In the shape of an L ♪
♪ on her forehead ♪
18
00:01:50,020 --> 00:01:52,939
♪ The years start coming ♪
♪ and they don't stop coming ♪
19
00:01:53,030 --> 00:01:55,859
♪ Fed to the rules ♪
♪ and I hit the ground running ♪
20
00:01:55,940 --> 00:01:58,199
♪ Didn't make sense ♪
♪ not to live for fun ♪
21
00:01:58,280 --> 00:02:00,489
♪ Your brain gets smart ♪
♪ but your head gets dumb ♪
22
00:02:00,570 --> 00:02:02,489
♪ So much to do ♪
♪ So much to see ♪
23
00:02:02,580 --> 00:02:05,159
♪ So what's wrong with ♪
♪ taking the back streets ♪
24
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:07,289
♪ You'll never know ♪
♪ if you don't go ♪
25
00:02:07,370 --> 00:02:09,829
♪ You'll never shine ♪
♪ if you don't glow ♪
26
00:02:09,920 --> 00:02:11,839
♪ Hey, now ♪
♪ You're an all-star ♪
27
00:02:11,920 --> 00:02:14,299
♪ Get your game on, go play ♪
28
00:02:14,380 --> 00:02:18,299
♪ Hey, now, you're a rock star ♪
♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪
29
00:02:18,380 --> 00:02:22,349
♪ And all that ♪
♪ glitters is gold ♪
30
00:02:22,430 --> 00:02:27,849
♪ Only shooting stars ♪
♪ break the mould ♪
31
00:02:27,940 --> 00:02:30,020
♪ It's a cool place ♪
♪ and they say it gets colder ♪
32
00:02:30,099 --> 00:02:32,339
♪ You're bundled up now ♪
♪ but wait till you get older ♪
33
00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:34,399
♪ But the meteor men ♪
♪ beg to differ ♪
34
00:02:34,479 --> 00:02:36,519
♪ Judging by the hole ♪
♪ in the satellite picture ♪
35
00:02:36,540 --> 00:02:39,199
♪ The ice we skate ♪
♪ is getting pretty thin ♪
36
00:02:39,278 --> 00:02:41,559
♪ The water's getting warm ♪
♪ so you might as well swim ♪
37
00:02:41,580 --> 00:02:43,239
♪ My world's on fire ♪
♪ How 'bout yours ♪
38
00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:45,989
♪ That's the way I like it ♪
♪ and I'll never get bored ♪
39
00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:48,709
♪ - Hey, now, you're an all-star ♪
♪ - [ SHOUTING ] ♪
40
00:02:48,790 --> 00:02:52,379
♪ Get your game on, go play ♪
41
00:02:52,460 --> 00:02:55,589
♪ Hey, now, you're a rock star ♪
♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪
42
00:02:55,670 --> 00:02:59,379
♪ And all that ♪
♪ glitters is gold ♪
43
00:02:59,470 --> 00:03:04,389
♪ Only shooting stars ♪
♪ break the mould ♪
44
00:03:04,470 --> 00:03:07,019
[ BELCHES ]
45
00:03:08,310 --> 00:03:10,229
- Go!
- Go!
46
00:03:10,310 --> 00:03:13,439
- [ RECORD SCRATCHING ]
- Go. Go. Go.
47
00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:16,069
♪ Hey, now ♪
♪ You're an all-star ♪
48
00:03:16,150 --> 00:03:19,239
♪ Get your game on, go play ♪
49
00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:23,569
♪ Hey, now, you're a rock star ♪
♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪
50
00:03:23,660 --> 00:03:27,539
♪ And all that ♪
♪ glitters is gold ♪
51
00:03:27,620 --> 00:03:32,919
♪ Only shooting stars ♪
♪ break the mould ♪
52
00:03:37,630 --> 00:03:40,879
- Think it's in there?
- AI right. Let's get it!
53
00:03:40,970 --> 00:03:43,719
Whoa. Ho Id on. Do you know
what that thing can do to you?
54
00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,759
Yeah, it'll grind
your bones for its bread.
55
00:03:46,850 --> 00:03:50,809
[ LAUGHS ] Yes, well, actually,
that would be a giant.
56
00:03:50,890 --> 00:03:54,939
Now, ogres... They're much worse.
57
00:03:55,020 --> 00:03:57,939
They'll make a suit
from your freshly peeled skin.
58
00:03:58,030 --> 00:04:00,109
- No!
- They'll shave your liver.
59
00:04:00,190 --> 00:04:03,449
Squeeze the jelly
from your eyes!
60
00:04:03,530 --> 00:04:06,069
- Actually, it's quite good on toast.
- Back! Back, beast!
61
00:04:06,160 --> 00:04:08,289
Back! I warn ta!
62
00:04:11,210 --> 00:04:14,579
- [ GASPING ]
- Right.
63
00:04:14,670 --> 00:04:17,419
[ ROARING ]
64
00:04:17,500 --> 00:04:22,259
- [ SHOUTING ]
- [ ROARING ]
65
00:04:22,340 --> 00:04:25,679
[ ROARING CONTINUES ]
66
00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:29,349
[ SHOUTING CONTINUES ]
67
00:04:29,430 --> 00:04:33,979
[ WHISPERS ] This is the part
where you run away.
68
00:04:34,060 --> 00:04:37,269
- [ GASPING ]
- [ LAUGHS ]
69
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:40,689
[ LAUGHING ]
70
00:04:40,780 --> 00:04:43,819
And stay out!
71
00:04:45,700 --> 00:04:48,779
Wanted. Fairy tale creatures.
72
00:04:50,410 --> 00:04:52,329
[ SIGHS ]
73
00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:56,669
[ MAN'S VOICE ]
All right. This one's full.
74
00:04:57,290 --> 00:04:59,379
- Take it away!
- [ GASPS ]
75
00:04:59,460 --> 00:05:03,339
- Move it along. Come on! Get up!
- Next!
76
00:05:03,420 --> 00:05:06,339
Give me that!
Your flying days are over.
77
00:05:06,430 --> 00:05:09,049
That's 20 pieces of silver
for the witch. Next!
78
00:05:09,140 --> 00:05:11,849
- Get up! Come on!
- Twenty pieces.
79
00:05:11,930 --> 00:05:14,309
- [ THUDDING ]
- Sit down there!
80
00:05:14,390 --> 00:05:16,899
- Keep quiet!
- [ CRYING ]
81
00:05:16,980 --> 00:05:19,859
This cage is too small.
82
00:05:19,940 --> 00:05:22,060
Please don't turn me in.
I'll never be stubborn again.
83
00:05:22,110 --> 00:05:24,109
I can change.
Please! Give me another chance!
84
00:05:24,190 --> 00:05:26,569
Oh, shut up. Oh! Next!
85
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:29,529
- What have you got?
- This little wooden puppet.
86
00:05:29,620 --> 00:05:34,539
I'm not a puppet.
I'm a real boy.
87
00:05:34,620 --> 00:05:36,999
Five shillings
for the possessed toy.
88
00:05:37,039 --> 00:05:39,279
- Take it away.
- Father, please! Don't let them do this!
89
00:05:39,300 --> 00:05:41,169
- Help me!
- Next. What have you got?
90
00:05:41,250 --> 00:05:43,879
- Well, I've got a talking donkey.
- [ GRUNTS ]
91
00:05:43,960 --> 00:05:48,509
Right. Well, that's good for
ten shillings, if you can prove it.
92
00:05:48,590 --> 00:05:52,509
Oh, go ahead, little fella.
93
00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:54,519
Well?
94
00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,309
Oh, oh, he's just...
He's just a little nervous.
95
00:05:57,390 --> 00:06:01,359
He's really quite a chatterbox.
Talk, you bone headed dolt...
96
00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:04,029
- That's it. I've heard enough. Guards!
- No, no, he talks!
97
00:06:04,110 --> 00:06:08,239
He does. I can talk.
I love to talk.
98
00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:11,239
I'm the talkingest
damn thing you ever saw.
99
00:06:11,330 --> 00:06:13,869
- Get her out of my sight.
- No, no!
100
00:06:13,950 --> 00:06:18,369
I swear! Oh! He can talk!
101
00:06:18,460 --> 00:06:20,629
[ GASPS ]
102
00:06:20,710 --> 00:06:23,089
Hey! I can fly!
103
00:06:23,170 --> 00:06:24,799
- He can fly!
- He can fly!
104
00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:27,929
- He can talk!
- Ha, ha! That's right, fool!
105
00:06:28,010 --> 00:06:30,259
Now I'm a flying,
talking donkey.
106
00:06:30,340 --> 00:06:32,969
You might have seen a house fly,
maybe even a super fly,
107
00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:36,099
but I bet you are not
never seen a donkey fly.
108
00:06:36,180 --> 00:06:38,099
Ha, ha!
109
00:06:38,190 --> 00:06:40,099
Uh-oh.
110
00:06:40,190 --> 00:06:42,399
[ GRUNTS ]
111
00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:44,439
Seize him!
112
00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:49,239
After him! He's getting away!
113
00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:56,999
[ GRUNTS, GASPS ]
114
00:06:57,080 --> 00:07:00,289
[ MAN ] Get him! This way! Turn!
115
00:07:05,500 --> 00:07:07,799
You there. Ogre!
116
00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:10,179
Aye?
117
00:07:10,260 --> 00:07:14,349
By the order of Lord Farquaad, I am
authorised to place you both under arrest...
118
00:07:14,430 --> 00:07:20,019
and transport you to
a designated... resettlement facility.
119
00:07:20,100 --> 00:07:24,149
Oh, really? You and what army?
120
00:07:27,570 --> 00:07:29,149
[ GASPS, WHIMPERING ]
121
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:31,149
[ CHUCKLES ]
122
00:07:34,910 --> 00:07:36,909
Can I say something to you?
123
00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:40,329
Listen, you was really, really something
back there. Incredible!
124
00:07:40,410 --> 00:07:46,169
Are you talking to... me? Whoa!
125
00:07:46,250 --> 00:07:50,219
Yes, I was talking to you. Can I tell you
that you was great back there? Those guards!
126
00:07:50,300 --> 00:07:53,009
They thought they was all of that.
Then you showed up, and bam!
127
00:07:53,088 --> 00:07:55,369
They was tripping over themselves
like babes in the woods.
128
00:07:55,390 --> 00:07:57,059
That really made me
feel good to see that.
129
00:07:57,140 --> 00:08:00,179
- Oh, that's great. Really.
- Man, it's good to be free.
130
00:08:00,270 --> 00:08:05,809
Now, why don't you go celebrate your
freedom with your own friends? Hmm?
131
00:08:05,900 --> 00:08:09,189
But, uh, I don't
have any friends.
132
00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:11,949
And I'm not going
out there by myself.
133
00:08:12,030 --> 00:08:14,569
Hey, wait a minute! I got
a great idea! I'll stick with you.
134
00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:16,579
You're a mean,
green, fighting machine.
135
00:08:16,660 --> 00:08:19,060
Together we'll scare
the spit out of anybody that crosses us.
136
00:08:20,330 --> 00:08:23,169
[ ROARING ]
137
00:08:23,250 --> 00:08:25,919
Oh, wow! That was really scary.
138
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:29,709
If you don't mind me saying, if that don't work,
your breath certainly will get the job done,
139
00:08:29,780 --> 00:08:32,980
'cause you definitely need some Tic Tacs
or something, 'cause your breath stinks!
140
00:08:33,010 --> 00:08:36,219
You almost burned the hair
outta my nose,
141
00:08:36,300 --> 00:08:39,139
just like the time... [ MUMBLING ]
142
00:08:39,220 --> 00:08:42,939
Then I ate some rotten berries. I had
strong gases eking out of my butt that day.
143
00:08:43,020 --> 00:08:45,729
Why are you following me?
144
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:49,399
I'll tell you why.
145
00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:52,399
♪ 'Cause I'm all alone ♪
146
00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:56,239
♪ There's no one here ♪
♪ beside me ♪
147
00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:59,989
♪ My problems ♪
♪ have all gone ♪
148
00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:03,409
♪ There's no one ♪
♪ to deride me ♪
149
00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:05,459
♪ But you gotta have friends... ♪
150
00:09:05,540 --> 00:09:08,589
Stop singing!
151
00:09:08,670 --> 00:09:10,709
It's no wonder
you don't have any friends.
152
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:14,419
Wow. Only a true friend
would be that truly honest.
153
00:09:14,510 --> 00:09:18,599
Listen, little donkey.
Take a look at me. What am I?
154
00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:21,599
Uh...
155
00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:26,729
- Really tall?
- No! I'm an ogre.
156
00:09:26,810 --> 00:09:30,019
You know.
Grab your torch and pitchforks.
157
00:09:30,110 --> 00:09:32,109
Doesn't that bother you?
158
00:09:32,190 --> 00:09:34,319
Nope.
159
00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:37,279
- Really?
- Really, really.
160
00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:40,489
- Oh.
- Man, I like you. What's your name?
161
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:44,249
Uh, Shrek.
162
00:09:44,330 --> 00:09:47,579
Shrek? Well, you know
what I like about you, Shrek?
163
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:51,709
You got that kind of I-don't-care-what-nobody-
thinks-of-me thing.
164
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:55,589
I like that.
I respect that, Shrek. You all right.
165
00:09:55,670 --> 00:09:59,679
Whoo! Look at that. Who'd want
to live in a place like that?
166
00:09:59,760 --> 00:10:02,969
That would be my home.
167
00:10:03,060 --> 00:10:05,929
Oh! And it is lovely!
Just beautiful.
168
00:10:06,020 --> 00:10:09,809
You are quite a decorator. It's amazing
what you've done with such a modest budget.
169
00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:14,649
I like that boulder.
That is a nice boulder.
170
00:10:18,410 --> 00:10:21,119
I guess you don't
entertain much, do you?
171
00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:22,989
I like my privacy.
172
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:25,659
You know, I do too.
That's another thing we have in common.
173
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,999
Like, I hate it when
you got somebody in your face.
174
00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:31,999
You're trying to give them a hint, and they
won't leave. There's that awkward silence.
175
00:10:35,130 --> 00:10:37,839
- Can I stay with you?
- Uh, what?
176
00:10:37,930 --> 00:10:40,509
Can I stay with you, please?
177
00:10:40,590 --> 00:10:42,889
- Of course!
- Really?
178
00:10:42,970 --> 00:10:45,349
- No.
- Please! I don't wanna go back there!
179
00:10:45,430 --> 00:10:49,349
You don't know what it's like to be
considered a freak. Well, maybe you do.
180
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:52,019
But that's why we gotta stick together.
You gotta let me stay!
181
00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:55,229
- Please! Please!
- Okay! Okay!
182
00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:57,899
- But one night only.
- Ah! Thank you!
183
00:10:57,990 --> 00:11:00,319
- What are you... No! No!
- This is gonna be fun!
184
00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:02,319
We can stay up late,
swapping manly stories,
185
00:11:02,410 --> 00:11:05,199
and in the morning
I'm making waffles.
186
00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:08,539
- Oh!
- Where do, uh, I sleep?
187
00:11:08,620 --> 00:11:10,369
Outside!
188
00:11:10,460 --> 00:11:13,539
Oh, well, I guess that's cool.
189
00:11:13,630 --> 00:11:15,709
I mean, I don't know you,
and you don't know me,
190
00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:18,169
so I guess outside
is best, you know.
191
00:11:18,260 --> 00:11:21,259
[ SNIFFLES ] Here I go.
192
00:11:23,430 --> 00:11:27,519
Good night. [ SIGHS ]
193
00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:31,599
I mean, I do like the outdoors.
I'm a donkey. I was born outside.
194
00:11:31,690 --> 00:11:34,359
I'll just be sitting by myself
outside, I guess, you know.
195
00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:36,729
By myself, outside.
196
00:11:36,820 --> 00:11:41,609
♪ I'm all alone ♪
♪ There's no one here beside me ♪
197
00:11:41,700 --> 00:11:43,029
[ BUBBLING ]
198
00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:03,259
[ SIGHS ]
199
00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:45,799
[ CREAKING ]
200
00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:48,509
[ SIGHS ]
I thought I told you to stay outside.
201
00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:52,269
- I am outside.
- [ CLATTERING ]
202
00:12:52,350 --> 00:12:54,099
[ CLATTERING ]
203
00:12:57,770 --> 00:13:01,569
Well, gents, it's a far cry from
the farm, but what choice do we have?
204
00:13:01,650 --> 00:13:04,149
It's not home,
but it'll do just fine.
205
00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:06,159
What a lovely bed.
206
00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:08,579
- Got ta.
- [ SNIFFS ] I found some cheese.
207
00:13:08,660 --> 00:13:11,159
- Ow! [ GRUNTS ]
- Blah! Awful stuff.
208
00:13:12,910 --> 00:13:15,499
- Is that you, Gorder?
- How did you know?
209
00:13:15,580 --> 00:13:18,499
Enough!
What are you doing in my house?
210
00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:20,499
[ GRUNTS ] Hey!
211
00:13:20,590 --> 00:13:23,219
- [ SNICKERS ]
- Oh, no, no, no.
212
00:13:23,300 --> 00:13:26,889
- Dead broad off the table.
- Where are we supposed to put her? The bed's taken.
213
00:13:26,970 --> 00:13:30,139
Huh? [ GASPS ]
214
00:13:30,220 --> 00:13:32,849
[ MALE VOICE ] What?
215
00:13:32,930 --> 00:13:37,689
I live in a swamp. I put up signs.
I'm a terrifying ogre!
216
00:13:37,770 --> 00:13:40,399
What do I have to do
to get a little privacy?
217
00:13:40,480 --> 00:13:42,899
- Aah!
- Oh, no.
218
00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:45,699
Oh, no.
219
00:13:45,780 --> 00:13:49,369
- No! No!
- [ CACKLING ]
220
00:13:49,450 --> 00:13:52,369
- [ CACKLING CONTINUES ]
- What?
221
00:13:52,450 --> 00:13:54,369
- Quit it.
- Don't push.
222
00:13:54,450 --> 00:13:58,709
- [ SQUEAKING ]
- [ LOWS ]
223
00:13:58,790 --> 00:14:01,709
What are you doing in my swamp?
224
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:04,209
[ ECHOING ] Swamp! Swamp! Swamp!
225
00:14:04,300 --> 00:14:07,509
- [ GASPING ]
- Oh, dear!
226
00:14:07,590 --> 00:14:09,219
Whoa!
227
00:14:09,300 --> 00:14:12,679
All right, get out of here.
All of you, move it!
228
00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:15,179
Come on! Let's go!
Hapaya! Hapaya! Hey!
229
00:14:15,270 --> 00:14:17,229
- Quickly. Come on!
- No, no!
230
00:14:17,310 --> 00:14:19,519
No, no. Not there. Not there.
231
00:14:19,610 --> 00:14:23,109
- Oh!
- [ SIGHS ]
232
00:14:23,190 --> 00:14:26,069
Hey, don't look at me.
I didn't invite them.
233
00:14:26,150 --> 00:14:28,239
Oh, gosh, no one invited us.
234
00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:30,909
- What?
- We were forced to come here.
235
00:14:30,990 --> 00:14:33,119
- By who?
- Lord Farquaad.
236
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:37,959
He huffed und he puffed und he...
signed an eviction notice.
237
00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:40,749
[ SIGHS ] All right.
238
00:14:40,830 --> 00:14:45,089
Who knows where
this Farquaad guy is?
239
00:14:45,170 --> 00:14:47,969
- [ MURMURING ]
- Oh, I do. I know where he is.
240
00:14:48,050 --> 00:14:51,759
Does anyone else
know where to find him?
241
00:14:53,220 --> 00:14:55,469
- Any one at all?
- Me! Me!
242
00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:57,479
- Anyone?
- Oh! Oh, pick me!
243
00:14:57,560 --> 00:14:59,979
Oh, I know! I know! Me, me!
244
00:15:00,060 --> 00:15:03,189
[ SIGHS ] Okay, fine.
245
00:15:03,270 --> 00:15:07,819
Attention,
all fairy tale things.
246
00:15:07,900 --> 00:15:12,619
Do not get comfortable.
Your welcome is officially worn out.
247
00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:16,409
In fact, I'm gonna see
this guy Farquaad right now...
248
00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:19,619
and get you all off my land
and back where you came from!
249
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:24,129
[ CHEERING ]
250
00:15:24,210 --> 00:15:27,089
- [ TWITTERING ]
- [ CHEERING CONTINUES ]
251
00:15:27,170 --> 00:15:30,129
Oh! You!
252
00:15:30,220 --> 00:15:32,139
You're coming with me.
253
00:15:32,220 --> 00:15:34,559
All right, that's
what I like to hear, man.
254
00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:38,429
Shrek and Donkey, two stalwart friends,
off on a whirlwind big-city adventure.
255
00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:40,519
I love it!
256
00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:43,769
♪ - On the road again Sing it ♪
♪ with me, Shrek. - Hey. Oh, oh! ♪
257
00:15:43,860 --> 00:15:45,819
♪ I can't wait to get ♪
♪ on the road again ♪
258
00:15:45,900 --> 00:15:47,819
What did I say about singing?
259
00:15:47,900 --> 00:15:49,819
- Can I whistle?
- No.
260
00:15:49,900 --> 00:15:52,699
- Can I hum it?
- All right, hum it.
261
00:15:52,780 --> 00:15:57,659
♪ [ HUMMING ] ♪
262
00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:00,040
[ GRUNTS ]
263
00:16:18,390 --> 00:16:22,389
[ WHIMPERING ]
264
00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:25,519
That's enough.
He's ready to talk.
265
00:16:25,610 --> 00:16:29,229
[ COUGHING ]
266
00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:33,239
[ LAUGHING ]
267
00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:36,829
[ CLEARS THROAT ]
268
00:16:38,450 --> 00:16:40,909
Run, run, run,
as fast as you can.
269
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:44,539
You can't catch me.
I'm the gingerbread man!
270
00:16:44,630 --> 00:16:48,209
- You're a monster.
- I'm not the monster here. You are.
271
00:16:48,300 --> 00:16:52,549
You and the rest of that fairy tale
trash, poisoning my perfect world.
272
00:16:52,630 --> 00:16:54,549
Now, tell me!
Where are the others?
273
00:16:54,640 --> 00:16:57,179
- Eat me!
- [ GRUNTS ]
274
00:16:57,260 --> 00:17:00,179
I've tried to be fair
to you creatures.
275
00:17:00,270 --> 00:17:03,769
Now my patience has reached its end!
Tell me or I'll...
276
00:17:03,850 --> 00:17:06,649
No, no, not the buttons.
Not my gumdrop buttons.
277
00:17:06,730 --> 00:17:08,729
All right then.
Who's hiding them?
278
00:17:08,820 --> 00:17:14,149
Okay, I'll tell you.
Do you know the muffin man?
279
00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:16,569
- The muffin man?
- The muffin man.
280
00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:20,079
Yes, I know the muffin man,
who lives on Drury Lane?
281
00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:23,579
Well, she's married
to the muffin man.
282
00:17:23,660 --> 00:17:25,789
- The muffin man?
- The muffin man!
283
00:17:25,870 --> 00:17:28,879
- She's married to the muffin man.
- [ DOOR OPENS ]
284
00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:30,629
My Lord! We found it.
285
00:17:30,710 --> 00:17:33,919
Then what are you waiting for?
Bring it in.
286
00:17:34,010 --> 00:17:36,299
[ MAN GRUNTING ]
287
00:17:45,310 --> 00:17:47,809
- [ GASPING ]
- Oh!
288
00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:52,229
- Magic mirror...
- Don't tell him anything!
289
00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,649
No!
290
00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:58,489
- [ GINGERBREAD MAN WHIMPERS ]
- Evening.
291
00:17:58,570 --> 00:18:00,449
Mirror, mirror, on the wall.
292
00:18:00,530 --> 00:18:03,909
Is this not the most
perfect kingdom of them all?
293
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:06,579
Well, technically
you're not a king.
294
00:18:06,670 --> 00:18:10,089
Uh, Thelonius.
295
00:18:10,170 --> 00:18:13,799
- You were saying?
- What I mean is, you're not a king yet.
296
00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:17,469
But you can become one. All
you have to do is marry a princess.
297
00:18:17,550 --> 00:18:20,549
- Go on.
- [ CHUCKLES ]
298
00:18:20,640 --> 00:18:24,269
So, just sit back
and relax, my Lord,
299
00:18:24,350 --> 00:18:28,649
because it's time for you to
meet today's eligible bachelorettes.
300
00:18:28,730 --> 00:18:32,319
And here they are!
301
00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:37,359
Bachelorette number one is a mentally
abused shut-in from a kingdom far, faraway.
302
00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:39,699
She likes sushi
and hot tubbing anytime.
303
00:18:39,780 --> 00:18:43,239
Her hobbies include cooking
and cleaning for her two evil sisters.
304
00:18:43,330 --> 00:18:45,699
Please welcome Cinderella.
305
00:18:45,790 --> 00:18:49,829
Bachelorette number two is a cape-wearing
girl from the land of fancy.
306
00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:52,629
Although she lives with
seven other men, she's not easy.
307
00:18:52,710 --> 00:18:56,169
Just kiss her dead, frozen lips
and find out what a live wire she is.
308
00:18:56,260 --> 00:19:00,009
Come on.
Give it up for Snow White!
309
00:19:00,090 --> 00:19:02,719
And last,
but certainly not least,
310
00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:04,889
bachelorette number three
is a fiery redhead...
311
00:19:04,970 --> 00:19:07,519
from a dragon-guarded castle
surrounded by hot boiling lava!
312
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:09,649
But don't let that cool you off.
313
00:19:09,730 --> 00:19:12,899
She's a loaded pistol who likes pina
coladas and getting caught in the rain.
314
00:19:12,980 --> 00:19:17,029
Yours for the rescuing,
Princess Fiona!
315
00:19:17,110 --> 00:19:19,569
So will it be
bachelorette number one,
316
00:19:19,660 --> 00:19:23,159
bachelorette number two
or bachelorette number three?
317
00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:25,409
- Two! Two!
- Three! Three!
318
00:19:25,490 --> 00:19:26,829
- Two! Two!
- Three!
319
00:19:26,910 --> 00:19:29,039
Three? One? [ SHUDDERS ] Three?
320
00:19:29,120 --> 00:19:31,169
Three!
Pick number three, my Lord!
321
00:19:31,250 --> 00:19:34,999
Okay, okay, uh, number three!
322
00:19:35,090 --> 00:19:39,839
Lord Farquaad,
you've chosen Princess Fiona.
323
00:19:39,930 --> 00:19:43,719
♪ If you love pina coladas ♪
324
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:47,139
♪ - And getting caught in the rain ♪
♪ - Princess Fiona. ♪
325
00:19:47,220 --> 00:19:49,389
♪ - If you're not into yoga ♪
♪ - She's perfect. ♪
326
00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:52,229
All I have to do is
just find someone who can go...
327
00:19:52,310 --> 00:19:55,030
But I probably should mention
the little thing that happens at night.
328
00:19:55,110 --> 00:19:57,029
- I'll do it.
- Yes, but after sunset...
329
00:19:57,110 --> 00:20:00,739
Silence! I will make
this Princess Fiona my queen,
330
00:20:00,820 --> 00:20:04,989
and DuLoc will finally
have the perfect king!
331
00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:07,289
Captain, assemble
your finest men.
332
00:20:07,370 --> 00:20:11,249
We're going to have
a tournament.
333
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:15,919
But that's it. That's it
right there. That's DuLoc.
334
00:20:16,000 --> 00:20:18,049
I told ta I'd find it.
335
00:20:18,130 --> 00:20:22,259
So, that must be
Lord Farquaad's castle.
336
00:20:22,340 --> 00:20:24,429
[ DONKEY ]
Uh-huh. That's the place.
337
00:20:24,510 --> 00:20:27,929
Do you think maybe
he's compensating for something?
338
00:20:28,020 --> 00:20:30,099
[ LAUGHS ]
339
00:20:30,180 --> 00:20:32,099
[ GROANS ]
340
00:20:32,190 --> 00:20:34,149
Hey, wait. Wait up, Shrek.
341
00:20:34,230 --> 00:20:37,109
Hurry, darling.
We're late. Hurry.
342
00:20:38,690 --> 00:20:42,239
- Hey, you!
- [ SCREAMS ]
343
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:45,159
Wait a second.
Look, I'm not gonna eat ta.
344
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:49,159
- I just... I just...
- [ WHIMPERING ]
345
00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,329
[ SIGHS ]
346
00:20:52,870 --> 00:20:55,579
[ WHIMPERING, GROANS ]
347
00:21:03,340 --> 00:21:05,259
[ TURNSTILE CLATTERS ]
348
00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:08,759
[ CHUCKLES ]
349
00:21:08,850 --> 00:21:11,349
[ SIGHS ]
350
00:21:11,430 --> 00:21:15,309
♪ [ INSTRUMENTAL MUZAK ] ♪
351
00:21:19,690 --> 00:21:21,279
It's quiet.
352
00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,989
Too quiet.
353
00:21:26,070 --> 00:21:28,489
[ CREAKING ]
354
00:21:28,580 --> 00:21:32,699
- Where is everybody?
- Hey, look at this!
355
00:21:35,420 --> 00:21:38,789
[ CLATTERING, WHIRRING, CLICKING ]
356
00:21:38,880 --> 00:21:42,339
[ CLICKING ]
357
00:21:42,420 --> 00:21:46,009
[ CLICKING QUICKENS ]
358
00:21:46,090 --> 00:21:49,509
♪ Welcome to DuLoc ♪
♪ such a perfect town ♪
359
00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:53,019
♪ Here we have some rules ♪
♪ Let us lay them down ♪
360
00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:56,979
♪ Don't make waves, stay in line ♪
♪ and we'll get along fine ♪
361
00:21:57,060 --> 00:22:00,689
♪ DuLoc is a perfect place ♪
362
00:22:00,770 --> 00:22:05,319
♪ Please keep off of the grass ♪
♪ Shine your shoes, wipe your... face ♪
363
00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:08,989
♪ DuLoc is, DuLoc is ♪
364
00:22:09,070 --> 00:22:12,539
♪ DuLoc is a perfect ♪
365
00:22:12,620 --> 00:22:16,039
♪ - Place ♪
♪ - [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] ♪
366
00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:18,709
[ WHIRRING ]
367
00:22:19,790 --> 00:22:24,009
Wow! Let's do that again!
368
00:22:24,090 --> 00:22:26,759
No. No. No, no, no! No.
369
00:22:26,840 --> 00:22:29,089
♪ [ TRUMPET FANFARE ] ♪
370
00:22:29,180 --> 00:22:31,559
- [ CROWD CHEERING ]
- [ FARQUAAD ] Brave knights.
371
00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:35,769
♪ - You are the best and brightest in ♪
♪ all the land. - [ DONKEY HUMMING ] ♪
372
00:22:35,850 --> 00:22:38,269
Today one of you
shall prove himself...
373
00:22:38,350 --> 00:22:40,689
All right. You're going the right way
for a smacked bottom.
374
00:22:40,770 --> 00:22:42,689
- Sorry about that.
- [ CHEERING ]
375
00:22:42,770 --> 00:22:48,279
That champion shall have the honour...
No, no... the privilege...
376
00:22:48,360 --> 00:22:52,409
to go forth and rescue
the lovely Princess Fiona...
377
00:22:52,490 --> 00:22:55,829
from the fiery keep
oft he dragon.
378
00:22:55,910 --> 00:23:00,129
If for any reason
the winner is unsuccessful,
379
00:23:00,210 --> 00:23:03,379
the first runner-up
will take his place...
380
00:23:03,460 --> 00:23:06,259
and so on and so forth.
381
00:23:06,340 --> 00:23:11,759
Some of you may die, but it's
a sacrifice I am willing to make.
382
00:23:11,850 --> 00:23:14,639
[ CHEERING ]
383
00:23:16,890 --> 00:23:19,309
Let the tournament begin!
384
00:23:23,020 --> 00:23:24,939
- [ GASPS ]
- Oh!
385
00:23:25,030 --> 00:23:28,279
- What is that?
- [ GASPING ]
386
00:23:28,360 --> 00:23:32,949
- It's hideous!
- Ah, that's not very nice.
387
00:23:33,030 --> 00:23:35,449
- It's just a donkey.
- Huh?
388
00:23:35,540 --> 00:23:38,499
Indeed. Knights, new plan!
389
00:23:38,580 --> 00:23:43,289
The one who kills the ogre will be
named champion! Have at him!
390
00:23:43,380 --> 00:23:47,299
- Get him!
- Oh, hey! Now come on! Hang on now.
391
00:23:47,380 --> 00:23:49,679
[ WOMAN ] Go ahead! Get him!
392
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:53,429
Can't we just settle this
over a pint?
393
00:23:53,510 --> 00:23:54,759
[ MAN ] Kill the beast!
394
00:23:54,850 --> 00:23:59,309
No? All right then.
395
00:23:59,390 --> 00:24:01,479
Come on!
396
00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:13,699
♪ I don't give a damn ♪
♪ about my reputation ♪
397
00:24:13,780 --> 00:24:17,789
♪ - You're living in the past ♪
♪ It's a new generation - Damn! ♪
398
00:24:17,870 --> 00:24:20,659
♪ - [ WHINNYING ] - A girl can ♪
♪ do what she wants to do ♪
399
00:24:20,750 --> 00:24:22,999
♪ And that's what ♪
♪ I'm gonna do ♪
400
00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:26,999
♪ And I don't give a damn ♪
♪ about my bad reputation ♪
401
00:24:27,090 --> 00:24:30,839
♪ Oh, no, no, no, no, no ♪
♪ Not me ♪
402
00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:34,299
♪ - Me, me, me ♪
♪ - Hey, Shrek, tag me! Tag me! ♪
403
00:24:34,390 --> 00:24:37,139
♪ And I don't give a damn ♪
♪ about my reputation ♪
404
00:24:37,220 --> 00:24:39,469
♪ Never said I wanted ♪
♪ to improve my station ♪
405
00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:42,059
Ah! [ LAUGHS ]
406
00:24:42,140 --> 00:24:44,700
♪ And I'm always feeling good ♪
♪ when I'm having fun Yeah! ♪
407
00:24:44,724 --> 00:24:46,359
♪ And I don't have ♪
♪ to please no one ♪
408
00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:48,359
The chair! Give him the chair!
409
00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:51,069
♪ And I don't give a damn ♪
♪ about my bad reputation ♪
410
00:24:51,150 --> 00:24:54,319
♪ Oh, no, no, no, no, no ♪
♪ Not me ♪
411
00:24:54,410 --> 00:24:55,819
♪ Me, me, me ♪
412
00:24:55,910 --> 00:24:58,579
♪ Oh, no, no, no, no ♪
413
00:24:58,660 --> 00:25:02,329
♪ Not me, not me ♪
414
00:25:02,410 --> 00:25:04,879
♪ - Not me ♪
♪ - [ BELL DINGS ] ♪
415
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:07,919
- [ CHEERING ]
- [ LAUGHS ]
416
00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:13,219
Oh, yeah! Ah! Ah!
417
00:25:13,300 --> 00:25:16,089
Thank you! Thank you very much!
418
00:25:16,180 --> 00:25:18,559
I'm here till Thursday.
Try the veal! Ha, ha!
419
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:23,099
- [ SHREK LAUGHS ]
- [ CROWD GASPING, MURMURING ]
420
00:25:25,020 --> 00:25:26,979
Shall I give the order, sir?
421
00:25:27,060 --> 00:25:30,649
No, I have a better idea.
422
00:25:30,730 --> 00:25:35,909
People of DuLoc,
I give you our champion!
423
00:25:35,990 --> 00:25:39,869
- What?
- Congratulations, ogre.
424
00:25:39,950 --> 00:25:44,289
You've won the honour of
embarking on a great and noble quest.
425
00:25:44,370 --> 00:25:48,749
Quest? I'm already on a quest,
a quest to get my swamp back.
426
00:25:48,840 --> 00:25:52,049
- Your swamp?
- Yeah, my swamp!
427
00:25:52,130 --> 00:25:54,589
Where you dumped
those fairy tale creatures!
428
00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:57,259
- [ CROWD MURMURING ]
- Indeed.
429
00:25:57,340 --> 00:25:59,429
All right, ogre,
I'll make you a deal.
430
00:25:59,510 --> 00:26:03,309
Go on this quest for me, and
I'll give you your swamp back.
431
00:26:03,390 --> 00:26:06,099
Exactly the way it was?
432
00:26:06,190 --> 00:26:08,939
Down to the last
slime-covered toad stool.
433
00:26:09,020 --> 00:26:12,279
- And the squatters?
- As good as gone.
434
00:26:15,320 --> 00:26:19,279
What kind of quest?
435
00:26:19,620 --> 00:26:22,016
[ DONKEY ] Let me get this straight.
You're gonna go fight a dragon...
436
00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:24,720
and rescue a princess just so Farquaad
will give you back a swamp...
437
00:26:24,749 --> 00:26:27,949
which you only don't have because he filled
it full of freaks in the first place.
438
00:26:27,970 --> 00:26:32,299
- Is that about right?
- Maybe there's a good reason donkeys shouldn't talk.
439
00:26:32,380 --> 00:26:35,919
I don't get it. Why don't you just
pull some of that ogre stuff on him?
440
00:26:36,010 --> 00:26:37,929
Throttle him,
lay siege to his fortress,
441
00:26:38,010 --> 00:26:40,849
grind his bones to make your bread,
the whole ogre trip.
442
00:26:40,930 --> 00:26:42,849
Oh, I know what.
443
00:26:42,930 --> 00:26:45,139
Maybe I could have
decapitated an entire village...
444
00:26:45,230 --> 00:26:47,349
and put their heads on a pike,
445
00:26:47,440 --> 00:26:51,059
gotten a knife, cut open their
spleen and drink their fluids.
446
00:26:51,150 --> 00:26:53,279
Does that sound good to you?
447
00:26:53,360 --> 00:26:55,989
Uh, no, not really, no.
448
00:26:56,070 --> 00:26:59,869
For your information, there's a lot
more to ogres than people think.
449
00:26:59,950 --> 00:27:02,699
- Example?
- Example?
450
00:27:02,780 --> 00:27:08,919
- Okay, um, ogres are like onions.
- [ SNIFFS ] They stink?
451
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:11,289
- Yes... No!
- They make you cry? - No!
452
00:27:11,380 --> 00:27:14,799
You leave them out in the sun, they get all
brown, start sprouting little white hairs.
453
00:27:14,880 --> 00:27:16,879
No! Layers!
454
00:27:16,970 --> 00:27:19,299
Onions have layers.
455
00:27:19,380 --> 00:27:22,679
Ogres have layers!
Onions have layers.
456
00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:25,179
You get it? We both have layers.
[ SIGHS ]
457
00:27:27,100 --> 00:27:30,689
Oh, you both have layers. Oh.
458
00:27:30,770 --> 00:27:34,149
[ SNIFFS ]
You know, not everybody likes onions.
459
00:27:34,230 --> 00:27:36,859
Cake! Everybody loves cakes!
Cakes have layers.
460
00:27:36,940 --> 00:27:40,859
I don't care...
what everyone likes.
461
00:27:40,950 --> 00:27:44,659
Ogres are not like cakes.
462
00:27:46,500 --> 00:27:49,869
You know what else
everybody likes? Parfaits.
463
00:27:49,959 --> 00:27:52,319
Have you ever met a person, you
say, Let's get some parfait,
464
00:27:52,340 --> 00:27:53,879
they say, No,
I don't like no parfait?
465
00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:56,709
- Parfaits are delicious.
- No!
466
00:27:56,800 --> 00:27:59,549
You dense, irritating,
miniature beast of burden!
467
00:27:59,630 --> 00:28:02,549
Ogres are like onions!
End of story.
468
00:28:02,640 --> 00:28:04,599
Bye-bye. See ta later.
469
00:28:08,430 --> 00:28:12,859
Parfaits may be the most delicious thing
on the whole damn planet.
470
00:28:12,940 --> 00:28:15,149
You know, I think
I preferred your humming.
471
00:28:15,230 --> 00:28:17,899
Do you have a tissue or something?
I'm making a mess.
472
00:28:17,990 --> 00:28:20,899
Just the word parfait
make me start slobbering.
473
00:28:25,330 --> 00:28:31,209
♪ I'm on my way from misery ♪
♪ to happiness today ♪
474
00:28:31,290 --> 00:28:33,789
♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪
♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪
475
00:28:33,880 --> 00:28:39,339
♪ I'm on my way from misery ♪
♪ to happiness today ♪
476
00:28:39,420 --> 00:28:41,879
♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪
♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪
477
00:28:41,970 --> 00:28:45,889
♪ And everything ♪
♪ that you receive up yonder ♪
478
00:28:45,970 --> 00:28:49,889
♪ Is what you give to me ♪
♪ the day I wander ♪
479
00:28:49,980 --> 00:28:52,939
♪ I'm on my way ♪
480
00:28:54,020 --> 00:28:56,939
♪ I'm on my way ♪
481
00:28:58,030 --> 00:29:00,109
♪ I'm on my way ♪
482
00:29:00,190 --> 00:29:02,649
Ooh! Shrek! Did you do that?
483
00:29:02,740 --> 00:29:06,529
You gotta warn somebody before you
just crack one off. My mouth was open.
484
00:29:06,620 --> 00:29:10,329
Believe me, Donkey, if
it was me, you'd be dead.
485
00:29:10,410 --> 00:29:13,169
[ SNIFFS ] It's brimstone.
486
00:29:13,250 --> 00:29:16,419
- We must be getting close.
- Yeah, right, brimstone.
487
00:29:16,500 --> 00:29:20,589
Don't be talking about it's the brimstone. I
know what I smell. It wasn't no brimstone.
488
00:29:20,670 --> 00:29:22,629
It didn't come off
no stone neither.
489
00:29:25,550 --> 00:29:27,759
[ RUMBLING ]
490
00:29:40,650 --> 00:29:43,989
Sure, it's big enough,
but look at the location.
491
00:29:44,070 --> 00:29:47,029
[ LAUGHING ]
492
00:29:47,120 --> 00:29:51,829
Uh, Shrek? Uh, remember when
you said ogres have layers?
493
00:29:51,910 --> 00:29:53,829
Oh, aye.
494
00:29:53,910 --> 00:29:57,499
Well, I have a bit
of a confession to make.
495
00:29:57,580 --> 00:30:00,959
Donkeys don't have layers. We wear
our fear right out there on our sleeves.
496
00:30:01,050 --> 00:30:05,129
- Wait a second. Donkeys don't have sleeves.
- You know what I mean.
497
00:30:05,220 --> 00:30:07,889
You can't tell me
you're afraid of heights.
498
00:30:07,970 --> 00:30:12,559
I'm just a little uncomfortable about being on
a rickety bridge over a boiling lake of lava!
499
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:16,689
Come on, Donkey.
I'm right here beside ta, okay?
500
00:30:16,770 --> 00:30:19,439
For emotional support,
501
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:24,069
we'll just tackle this thing
together one little baby step at a time.
502
00:30:24,150 --> 00:30:26,069
- Really?
- Really, really.
503
00:30:26,150 --> 00:30:29,369
- Okay, that makes me feel so much better.
- Just keep moving.
504
00:30:29,450 --> 00:30:34,039
- And don't look down.
- Okay, don't look down. Don't look down.
505
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:37,499
Don't look down.
Keep on moving. Don't look down.
506
00:30:37,580 --> 00:30:41,379
[ GASPS ] Shrek! I'm looking down!
507
00:30:41,460 --> 00:30:44,379
Oh, God, I can't do this!
Just let me off, please!
508
00:30:44,460 --> 00:30:48,009
- But you're already halfway.
- But I know that half is safe!
509
00:30:48,090 --> 00:30:50,889
Okay, fine. I don't
have time for this. You go back.
510
00:30:50,970 --> 00:30:53,389
- Shrek, no! Wait!
- Just, Donkey...
511
00:30:53,470 --> 00:30:56,559
- Let's have a dance then, shall we?
- Don't do that!
512
00:30:56,640 --> 00:31:00,519
Oh, I'm sorry. Do what?
513
00:31:00,610 --> 00:31:03,689
- Oh, this?
- Yes, that!
514
00:31:03,780 --> 00:31:07,199
Yes? Yes, do it. Okay.
515
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:09,569
[ SCREAMS ] No, Shrek!
516
00:31:09,660 --> 00:31:12,779
- No! Stop it!
- You said do it! I'm doing it.
517
00:31:12,870 --> 00:31:17,119
I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die.
Shrek, I'm gonna die.
518
00:31:17,210 --> 00:31:19,709
Oh!
519
00:31:19,790 --> 00:31:23,799
That'll do, Donkey. That'll do.
520
00:31:27,170 --> 00:31:29,429
Cool.
521
00:31:29,510 --> 00:31:32,259
[ DONKEY ] So where is this
fire-breathing pain-in-the-neck anyway?
522
00:31:32,350 --> 00:31:36,099
Inside, waiting for us
to rescue her.
523
00:31:36,180 --> 00:31:39,099
[ CHUCKLES ]
I was talking about the dragon, Shrek.
524
00:31:40,560 --> 00:31:42,439
[ WATER DRIPPING ]
525
00:31:44,110 --> 00:31:46,029
[ WIND HOWLING ]
526
00:31:54,580 --> 00:31:56,499
[ DONKEY WHISPERING ] You afraid?
527
00:31:56,580 --> 00:31:59,869
No, but... Shh.
528
00:31:59,960 --> 00:32:03,499
Oh, good. Me neither. [ GASPS ]
529
00:32:03,590 --> 00:32:06,959
'Cause there's nothing
wrong with being afraid.
530
00:32:07,050 --> 00:32:10,299
Fear's a sensible response
to an unfamiliar situation.
531
00:32:10,380 --> 00:32:12,429
Unfamiliar dangerous
situation, I might add.
532
00:32:12,510 --> 00:32:15,190
With a dragon that breathes fire
and eats knights and breathes fire,
533
00:32:15,220 --> 00:32:18,679
it sure doesn't mean you're a coward
if you're a little scared.
534
00:32:18,770 --> 00:32:22,769
I sure as heck am not a coward.
I know that. [ GASPS ]
535
00:32:22,860 --> 00:32:26,189
Donkey, two things, okay?
536
00:32:26,280 --> 00:32:28,819
Shut... up.
537
00:32:28,900 --> 00:32:31,659
Now go over there and see
if you can find any stairs.
538
00:32:31,740 --> 00:32:34,369
Stairs? I thought
we was looking for the princess.
539
00:32:34,450 --> 00:32:39,329
The princess will be up the stairs in
the highest room in the tallest tower.
540
00:32:39,410 --> 00:32:42,999
- What makes you think she'll be there?
- I read it in a book once.
541
00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:46,999
Cool. You handle the dragon.
I'll handle the stairs.
542
00:32:47,090 --> 00:32:50,129
I'll find those stairs.
I'll whip their butt too.
543
00:32:50,220 --> 00:32:52,179
Those stairs won't know
which way they're going.
544
00:32:52,260 --> 00:32:54,679
[ CREAKING ]
545
00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:58,639
I'm gonna take drastic steps.
546
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:01,519
Kick it to the kerb. Don't mess
with me. I'm the stair master.
547
00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:06,189
I've mastered the stairs. I wish I had a
step right here. I'd step all over it.
548
00:33:09,150 --> 00:33:12,699
Well, at least we know
where the princess is, but where's the...
549
00:33:12,780 --> 00:33:17,029
Dragon! [ SCREAMS ]
550
00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:20,039
[ GASPS ]
551
00:33:25,420 --> 00:33:27,089
[ ROARS ]
552
00:33:30,630 --> 00:33:32,879
Donkey, look out! [ SCREAMS ]
553
00:33:34,090 --> 00:33:38,059
[ SCREAMS ]
554
00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:42,229
[ WHIMPERING ]
555
00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:46,519
- Got ta!
- [ ROARS ]
556
00:33:46,610 --> 00:33:49,689
[ GASPS ]
557
00:33:49,780 --> 00:33:55,029
[ SHOUTS ] Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
558
00:33:55,110 --> 00:33:58,079
[ SCREAMING ]
559
00:34:06,290 --> 00:34:08,919
[ GASPS ]
560
00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:13,629
Oh! Aah! Aah!
561
00:34:13,720 --> 00:34:17,219
[ GASPING ]
562
00:34:18,430 --> 00:34:22,219
[ GROWLS ]
563
00:34:22,310 --> 00:34:25,729
No. Oh, no. No! [ SCREAMS ]
564
00:34:25,810 --> 00:34:29,439
- Oh, what large teeth you have.
- [ GROWLS ]
565
00:34:29,520 --> 00:34:33,359
I mean, white, sparkling teeth. I know you
probably hear this all the time from your food,
566
00:34:33,440 --> 00:34:37,569
but you must bleach, 'cause that
is one dazzling smile you got there.
567
00:34:37,660 --> 00:34:40,159
Do I detect a hint
of minty freshness?
568
00:34:40,240 --> 00:34:44,999
And you know what else?
You're... You're a girl dragon!
569
00:34:45,080 --> 00:34:49,589
Oh, sure! I mean,
of course you're a girl dragon.
570
00:34:49,670 --> 00:34:53,459
You're just reeking
of feminine beauty.
571
00:34:53,550 --> 00:34:55,879
What's the matter with you?
You got something in your eye?
572
00:34:55,970 --> 00:34:58,799
Ooh. Oh. Oh.
573
00:34:58,850 --> 00:35:01,450
Man, I'd really love to stay,
but, you know, I'm, uh... [ COUGHS ]
574
00:35:01,474 --> 00:35:05,349
I'm an asthmatic, and I don't know if it'd
work out if you're gonna blow smoke rings.
575
00:35:05,430 --> 00:35:07,349
Shrek! [ GASPS ]
576
00:35:07,440 --> 00:35:11,149
[ WHIMPERING ] No! Shrek! Shrek!
577
00:35:11,230 --> 00:35:13,149
Shrek!
578
00:35:13,780 --> 00:35:17,029
[ Groans, Sighs ]
579
00:35:17,110 --> 00:35:20,319
♪ [ CHORUS VOCALISING ] ♪
580
00:35:24,790 --> 00:35:28,999
♪ [ VOCALISING CONTINUES ] ♪
581
00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:44,349
♪ [ VOCALISING CONTINUES ] ♪
582
00:35:44,430 --> 00:35:45,849
Oh! Oh!
583
00:35:45,930 --> 00:35:47,849
- Wake up!
- What?
584
00:35:47,940 --> 00:35:49,559
Are you Princess Fiona?
585
00:35:49,650 --> 00:35:54,979
I am, awaiting a knight
so bold as to rescue me.
586
00:35:55,070 --> 00:35:57,069
Oh, that's nice. Now let's go!
587
00:35:57,150 --> 00:35:59,149
But wait, Sir Knight.
588
00:35:59,240 --> 00:36:01,529
This be-ith our first meeting.
589
00:36:01,620 --> 00:36:05,329
Should it not be
a wonderful, romantic moment?
590
00:36:05,410 --> 00:36:09,749
- Yeah, sorry, lady. There's no time.
- Hey, wait. What are you doing?
591
00:36:09,830 --> 00:36:11,919
You should sweep me
off my feet...
592
00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:15,379
out yonder window and down a rope
on to your valiant steed.
593
00:36:15,460 --> 00:36:18,259
You've had a lot of time
to plan this, haven't you?
594
00:36:18,340 --> 00:36:22,589
Mm-hmm. [ SCREAMS, GRUNTS ]
595
00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:25,559
But we have to
savour this moment!
596
00:36:25,640 --> 00:36:28,389
You could recite
an epic poem for me.
597
00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:30,939
A ballad? A sonnet!
598
00:36:31,020 --> 00:36:34,269
- A Limerick? Or something!
- I don't think so.
599
00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:38,779
Can I at least know
the name of my champion?
600
00:36:38,860 --> 00:36:40,779
Um, Shrek.
601
00:36:40,860 --> 00:36:44,579
Sir Shrek. [ CLEARS THROAT ]
602
00:36:44,660 --> 00:36:49,409
I pray that you take this favour
as a token of my gratitude.
603
00:36:50,540 --> 00:36:52,539
Thanks!
604
00:36:54,290 --> 00:36:56,459
[ ROARING ]
605
00:36:56,550 --> 00:36:58,379
You didn't slay the dragon?
606
00:36:58,460 --> 00:37:00,919
- It's on my to-do list. Now come on!
- [ SCREAMS ]
607
00:37:01,010 --> 00:37:03,589
But this isn't right!
608
00:37:03,680 --> 00:37:05,929
You were meant to charge in,
sword drawn, banner flying.
609
00:37:06,010 --> 00:37:08,099
That's what all
the other knights did.
610
00:37:08,180 --> 00:37:10,479
Yeah, right before
they burst into flame.
611
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:14,099
That's not the point. Oh!
612
00:37:14,190 --> 00:37:16,649
Wait. Where are you going?
The exit's over there.
613
00:37:16,730 --> 00:37:18,779
Well, I have to save my ass.
614
00:37:18,860 --> 00:37:22,069
What kind of knight are you?
615
00:37:22,150 --> 00:37:24,569
One of a kind.
616
00:37:24,660 --> 00:37:27,029
[ DONKEY ]
Slowdown. Slowdown, baby, please.
617
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:31,329
I believe it's healthy to get to
know someone over a long period of time.
618
00:37:31,410 --> 00:37:33,999
Just call me old-fashioned.
[ LAUGHS ]
619
00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:37,589
I don't want to rush into
a physical relationship.
620
00:37:37,670 --> 00:37:41,129
I'm not emotionally ready
for a commitment of, uh, this...
621
00:37:41,220 --> 00:37:43,509
Magnitude really is
the word I'm looking for.
622
00:37:43,590 --> 00:37:47,099
Magnitude... Hey, that is
unwanted physical contact.
623
00:37:47,180 --> 00:37:49,639
Hey, what are you doing?
624
00:37:49,720 --> 00:37:52,979
Okay, okay. Let's just backup a little
and take this one step a ta time.
625
00:37:53,060 --> 00:37:57,189
We really should get to know each other
first as friends or pen pals.
626
00:37:57,270 --> 00:38:01,489
I'm on the road a lot,
but I just love receiving cards...
627
00:38:01,570 --> 00:38:03,989
I'd really love to stay, but...
628
00:38:04,070 --> 00:38:06,659
Don't do that! That's my tail!
That's my personal tail.
629
00:38:06,740 --> 00:38:10,159
You're gonna tear it off. I don't give
permission... What are you gonna do with that?
630
00:38:10,240 --> 00:38:14,039
Hey, now. No way. No! No!
631
00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:16,879
No, no! No. No, no, no! No! Oh!
632
00:38:21,760 --> 00:38:23,719
[ GROWLS ]
633
00:38:26,590 --> 00:38:28,509
[ ROARS ]
634
00:38:42,230 --> 00:38:43,649
- [ ROARING ]
- [ GASPS ]
635
00:38:43,740 --> 00:38:45,699
- Hi, Princess!
- It talks!
636
00:38:45,780 --> 00:38:49,529
Yeah, it's getting him
to shut up that's the trick.
637
00:38:49,620 --> 00:38:50,869
[ SCREAMS ]
638
00:38:52,410 --> 00:38:54,709
[ SCREAMING ]
639
00:38:54,790 --> 00:38:56,419
Oh!
640
00:38:56,500 --> 00:38:57,879
- [ THUDS ]
- [ GROANS ]
641
00:38:57,960 --> 00:39:01,379
[ SHREK GROANS ]
642
00:39:01,460 --> 00:39:04,589
[ ROARS ]
643
00:39:06,590 --> 00:39:08,509
[ ROARS ]
644
00:39:09,970 --> 00:39:12,889
[ ROARING ]
645
00:39:14,470 --> 00:39:17,019
[ ROARS ]
646
00:39:25,110 --> 00:39:27,029
Okay, you two,
head for the exit!
647
00:39:28,160 --> 00:39:30,699
I'll take care of the dragon.
648
00:39:37,290 --> 00:39:42,709
[ ECHOING ] Run!
649
00:39:52,350 --> 00:39:56,019
[ GASPING ]
650
00:39:56,100 --> 00:39:58,269
[ SCREAMING ]
651
00:39:58,350 --> 00:40:01,559
[ ROARING ]
652
00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:06,439
- [ SCREAMS ]
- [ ROARS ]
653
00:40:10,360 --> 00:40:14,119
[ PANTING, SIGHS ]
654
00:40:14,200 --> 00:40:16,119
[ WHIMPERS ]
655
00:40:16,200 --> 00:40:18,789
[ ROARS ]
656
00:40:20,500 --> 00:40:23,839
[ ROARS, WHIMPERS ]
657
00:40:24,290 --> 00:40:28,969
- [ DRAGON GROWLING IN THE DISTANCE ]
- You did it!
658
00:40:29,050 --> 00:40:31,929
You rescued me!
You're amazing. You're...
659
00:40:32,010 --> 00:40:35,759
You're wonderful. You're...
660
00:40:35,850 --> 00:40:38,139
a little unorthodox I'll admit.
661
00:40:38,230 --> 00:40:43,149
But thy deed is great,
and thine heart is pure.
662
00:40:43,230 --> 00:40:47,029
- I am eternally in your debt.
- [ CLEARS THROAT ]
663
00:40:47,110 --> 00:40:51,449
And where would a brave knight be
without his noble steed?
664
00:40:51,530 --> 00:40:56,199
I hope you heard that. She called me
a noble steed. She think I'm a steed.
665
00:40:56,290 --> 00:40:59,449
[ FIONA LAUGHS ]
The battle is won.
666
00:40:59,540 --> 00:41:02,039
You may remove your helmet,
good Sir Knight.
667
00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:04,709
- Uh, no.
- Why not?
668
00:41:04,790 --> 00:41:06,999
I have helmet hair.
669
00:41:07,090 --> 00:41:10,299
Please. I would'st look
upon the face of my rescuer.
670
00:41:10,380 --> 00:41:12,969
No, no, you wouldn't... 'St.
671
00:41:13,050 --> 00:41:15,509
But how will you kiss me?
672
00:41:15,600 --> 00:41:19,349
What? That wasn't
in the job description.
673
00:41:19,430 --> 00:41:21,809
Maybe it's a perk.
674
00:41:21,890 --> 00:41:26,319
No, it's destiny.
Oh, you must know how it goes.
675
00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:30,189
A princess locked in a tower
and beset by a dragon...
676
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:33,199
is rescued by a brave knight,
677
00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:36,579
and then they share
true love's first kiss.
678
00:41:36,660 --> 00:41:38,739
Hmm? With Shrek?
You think... Wait.
679
00:41:38,830 --> 00:41:41,999
Wait. You think that
Shrek is your true love?
680
00:41:42,080 --> 00:41:44,079
Well, yes.
681
00:41:45,790 --> 00:41:48,049
- [ LAUGHING ]
- [ LAUGHING ]
682
00:41:48,130 --> 00:41:50,589
You think Shrek
is your true love!
683
00:41:50,670 --> 00:41:52,589
What is so funny?
684
00:41:52,670 --> 00:41:55,759
Let's just say I'm
not your type, okay?
685
00:41:55,840 --> 00:41:59,349
Of course, you are.
You're my rescuer.
686
00:41:59,430 --> 00:42:01,889
Now... Now remove your helmet.
687
00:42:01,980 --> 00:42:04,189
Look. I really don't think
this is a good idea.
688
00:42:04,270 --> 00:42:06,269
- Just take off the helmet.
- I'm not going to.
689
00:42:06,360 --> 00:42:07,519
- Take it off.
- No!
690
00:42:07,610 --> 00:42:09,689
- Now!
- Okay!
691
00:42:09,780 --> 00:42:14,279
Easy. As you command,
Your Highness.
692
00:42:24,330 --> 00:42:27,749
You... You're a... an ogre.
693
00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:31,759
Oh, you were expecting
Prince Charming.
694
00:42:31,840 --> 00:42:34,339
Well, yes, actually.
695
00:42:36,260 --> 00:42:39,509
Oh, no. This is all wrong.
696
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:41,889
You're not supposed
to be an ogre.
697
00:42:41,970 --> 00:42:47,229
[ SIGHS ] Princess, I was sent
to rescue you by Lord Farquaad, okay?
698
00:42:47,310 --> 00:42:49,229
He's the one
who wants to marry you.
699
00:42:49,310 --> 00:42:51,229
Then why didn't
he come rescue me?
700
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:55,649
Good question. You should
ask him that when we get there.
701
00:42:55,740 --> 00:42:58,779
But I have to be rescued
by my true love,
702
00:42:58,870 --> 00:43:01,619
not by some ogre
and his... his pet.
703
00:43:01,700 --> 00:43:03,749
So much for noble steed.
704
00:43:03,830 --> 00:43:06,459
You're not making
my job any easier.
705
00:43:06,540 --> 00:43:09,919
I'm sorry, but your job
is not my problem.
706
00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:15,259
You can tell Lord Farquaad
that if he wants to rescue me properly,
707
00:43:15,340 --> 00:43:17,679
I'll be waiting for him
right here.
708
00:43:17,760 --> 00:43:22,809
Hey! I'm no one's messenger boy,
all right? I'm a delivery boy.
709
00:43:22,890 --> 00:43:25,139
You wouldn't dare.
710
00:43:25,230 --> 00:43:27,229
- Put me down!
- Ya coming, Donkey?
711
00:43:27,310 --> 00:43:29,269
I'm right behind ta.
712
00:43:29,350 --> 00:43:32,939
Put me down, or you will
suffer the consequences!
713
00:43:33,030 --> 00:43:37,529
This is not dignified!
Put me down! [ SCREAMS ]
714
00:43:37,610 --> 00:43:40,489
Okay, so here's
another question.
715
00:43:40,570 --> 00:43:43,770
Say there's a woman that digs you, right,
but you don't really like her that way.
716
00:43:43,809 --> 00:43:46,249
How do you let her down real easy
so her feelings aren't hurt,
717
00:43:46,270 --> 00:43:48,669
but you don't get burned
to a crisp and eaten?
718
00:43:48,750 --> 00:43:51,499
You just tell her
she's not your true love.
719
00:43:51,590 --> 00:43:54,299
Everyone knowest what happens
when you find your...
720
00:43:54,380 --> 00:43:56,969
Hey! [ SIGHS ]
721
00:43:57,050 --> 00:43:59,339
The sooner we get
to DuLoc the better.
722
00:43:59,430 --> 00:44:02,349
You're gonna love it there,
Princess. It's beautiful!
723
00:44:02,430 --> 00:44:06,179
And what of my groom-to-be?
Lord Farquaad? What's he like?
724
00:44:06,270 --> 00:44:08,389
Let me put it this way,
Princess.
725
00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:12,479
Men of Farquaad's stature
are in short supply.
726
00:44:12,560 --> 00:44:14,479
[ LAUGHS ]
727
00:44:14,570 --> 00:44:18,649
I don't know. There are those who
think little of him.
728
00:44:18,740 --> 00:44:20,699
[ BOTH LAUGHING ]
729
00:44:20,780 --> 00:44:23,659
Stop it. Stop it, both of you.
730
00:44:23,740 --> 00:44:28,709
You're just jealous you can never measure
up to a great ruler like Lord Farquaad.
731
00:44:28,790 --> 00:44:31,709
Yeah, well, maybe
you're right, Princess.
732
00:44:31,790 --> 00:44:35,089
But I'll let you do the measuring
when you see him tomorrow.
733
00:44:35,170 --> 00:44:39,379
Tomorrow? It'll take that lon?
734
00:44:39,470 --> 00:44:44,179
- Shouldn't we stop to make camp?
- No, that'll take longer.
735
00:44:44,260 --> 00:44:48,679
- We can keep going.
- But there's robbers in the woods.
736
00:44:48,770 --> 00:44:52,099
Whoa! Time out, Shrek!
Camping is starting to sound good.
737
00:44:52,190 --> 00:44:56,279
Hey, come on. I'm scarier than anything
we're going to see in this forest.
738
00:44:56,360 --> 00:44:58,739
I need to find
somewhere to camp now!
739
00:44:58,820 --> 00:45:01,029
[ BIRD WINGS FLUTTERING ]
740
00:45:03,070 --> 00:45:05,529
[ GRUNTING ]
741
00:45:05,620 --> 00:45:09,709
- Hey! Over here.
- Shrek, we can do better than that.
742
00:45:09,790 --> 00:45:12,369
I don't think
this is fit for a princess.
743
00:45:12,460 --> 00:45:15,249
No, no, it's perfect.
It just needs a few homey touches.
744
00:45:15,340 --> 00:45:20,259
- Homey touches? Like what?
- [ CRASHING ]
745
00:45:20,340 --> 00:45:24,599
A door? Well, gentlemen,
I bid thee good night.
746
00:45:24,680 --> 00:45:27,059
You want me to read you
a bedtime story? I will.
747
00:45:27,140 --> 00:45:29,469
I said good night!
748
00:45:31,940 --> 00:45:33,899
Shrek, what are you doing?
749
00:45:33,980 --> 00:45:37,019
[ LAUGHS ]
I just... You know... Oh, come on.
750
00:45:37,110 --> 00:45:39,739
I was just kidding.
751
00:45:43,030 --> 00:45:44,949
[ FIRE CRACKLING ]
752
00:45:45,030 --> 00:45:48,619
And, uh, that one,
that's Throwback,
753
00:45:48,700 --> 00:45:52,119
the only ogre to ever spit
over three wheat fields.
754
00:45:52,210 --> 00:45:55,289
Right. Yeah.
755
00:45:55,380 --> 00:45:58,299
Hey, can you tell my future
from these stars?
756
00:45:58,380 --> 00:46:01,969
The stars don't tell the future, Donkey.
They tell stories.
757
00:46:02,050 --> 00:46:05,639
Look, there's BITNET,
the Fitment.
758
00:46:05,720 --> 00:46:09,349
- You can guess what he's famous for.
- I know you're making this up.
759
00:46:09,430 --> 00:46:12,139
No, look. There he is,
760
00:46:12,230 --> 00:46:15,309
and there's the group of hunters
running away from his stench.
761
00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:17,979
That is nothing but
a bunch of little dots.
762
00:46:18,070 --> 00:46:21,989
Sometimes things are
more than they appear.
763
00:46:22,070 --> 00:46:24,239
Hmm?
764
00:46:24,320 --> 00:46:26,369
Forget it.
765
00:46:26,450 --> 00:46:29,119
[ SIGHS ]
766
00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:32,959
Hey, Shrek, what we gonna do
when we get our swamp anyway?
767
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:34,829
Our swamp?
768
00:46:34,920 --> 00:46:36,999
You know, when we're through
rescuing the princess.
769
00:46:37,080 --> 00:46:41,839
We? Donkey, there's no we.
There's no our.
770
00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:44,169
There's just me and my swamp.
771
00:46:44,260 --> 00:46:48,509
The first thing I'm gonna do is build
a ten-foot wall around my land.
772
00:46:48,600 --> 00:46:51,099
You cut me deep, Shrek.
773
00:46:51,180 --> 00:46:54,519
You cut me real deep just now.
774
00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:56,519
You know what I think?
775
00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:59,729
I think this whole wall thing
is just a way to keep somebody out.
776
00:46:59,820 --> 00:47:03,989
- No, do ta think?
- Are you hiding something?
777
00:47:04,070 --> 00:47:06,029
Never mind, Donkey.
778
00:47:06,110 --> 00:47:09,529
Oh, this is another one of
those onion things, isn't it?
779
00:47:09,620 --> 00:47:13,199
No, this is one of those drop-it
and leave-it-alone things.
780
00:47:13,290 --> 00:47:17,039
- Why don't you want to talk about it?
- Why do you want to?
781
00:47:17,120 --> 00:47:18,919
- Why are you blocking?
- I'm not blocking.
782
00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:21,249
- Oh, yes, you are.
- Donkey, I'm warning you.
783
00:47:21,340 --> 00:47:24,839
- Who you trying to keep out?
- Everyone! Okay?
784
00:47:26,090 --> 00:47:28,549
Oh, now we're getting somewhere.
785
00:47:28,640 --> 00:47:31,929
Oh! For the love of Pete!
786
00:47:32,010 --> 00:47:34,429
What's your problem?
What you got against the whole world?
787
00:47:34,520 --> 00:47:36,729
I'm not the one
with the problem, okay?
788
00:47:36,810 --> 00:47:39,769
It's the world that seems
to have a problem with me.
789
00:47:39,860 --> 00:47:43,729
People take one look at me
and go, Aah! Help! Run!
790
00:47:43,820 --> 00:47:47,569
A big, stupid, ugly ogre!
791
00:47:47,650 --> 00:47:51,869
[ SIGHS ] They judge me before
they even know me.
792
00:47:51,950 --> 00:47:53,869
That's why I'm better off alone.
793
00:48:01,790 --> 00:48:03,999
You know what?
794
00:48:04,090 --> 00:48:09,759
When we met, I didn't think you was
just a big, stupid, ugly ogre.
795
00:48:09,840 --> 00:48:12,759
Yeah, I know.
796
00:48:12,850 --> 00:48:16,269
So, uh, are there
any donkeys up there?
797
00:48:16,350 --> 00:48:19,729
Well, there's, um, Gabby,
798
00:48:19,810 --> 00:48:22,109
the Small and Annoying.
799
00:48:22,190 --> 00:48:27,109
Okay, I see it now. The big shiny
one, right there. That one there?
800
00:48:27,190 --> 00:48:30,359
- That's the moon.
- Oh, okay.
801
00:48:40,540 --> 00:48:44,959
♪ [ ORCHESTRA ] ♪
802
00:48:46,550 --> 00:48:50,429
♪ [ DULCIMER ] ♪
803
00:48:51,720 --> 00:48:54,139
[ FARQUAAD ] Again. Show me again.
804
00:48:54,220 --> 00:48:58,519
[ MUSIC STOPS, REWINDS ]
805
00:48:58,600 --> 00:49:02,689
Mirror, mirror, show her to me.
Show me the princess.
806
00:49:02,770 --> 00:49:06,819
♪ - Humph. ♪
♪ - [ REWINDS, RESUMES ] ♪
807
00:49:06,900 --> 00:49:11,699
Ah. Perfect. [ INHALES ]
808
00:49:18,700 --> 00:49:20,619
[ SNORING ]
809
00:49:28,590 --> 00:49:32,049
♪ [ VOCALISING ] ♪
810
00:49:32,130 --> 00:49:35,349
♪ [ VOCALISING CONTINUES ] ♪
811
00:49:35,430 --> 00:49:38,219
♪ [ WHISTLING ] ♪
812
00:49:38,310 --> 00:49:41,559
♪ [ WHISTLING CONTINUES ] ♪
813
00:49:41,640 --> 00:49:44,689
♪ - [ VOCALISES ] ♪
♪ - [ WHISTLES ] ♪
814
00:49:44,770 --> 00:49:47,819
♪ - [ VOCALISES ] ♪
♪ - [ WHISTLES ] ♪
815
00:49:47,900 --> 00:49:50,989
♪ - [ VOCALISING ] ♪
♪ - [ WHISTLING ] ♪
816
00:49:51,070 --> 00:49:54,489
♪ - [ VOCALISING, HIGH-PITCHED ] ♪
♪ - [ WHISTLING, HIGH-PITCHED ] ♪
817
00:49:54,570 --> 00:49:56,829
♪ [ CONTINUES ] ♪
818
00:49:59,160 --> 00:50:00,699
[ SIZZLING ]
819
00:50:07,630 --> 00:50:11,719
[ SNIFFS, YAWNS ]
820
00:50:15,010 --> 00:50:17,889
Mmm, yeah, you know
I like it like that.
821
00:50:17,970 --> 00:50:22,229
- Come on, baby. I said I like it.
- Donkey, wake up.
822
00:50:22,310 --> 00:50:24,849
- Huh? What?
- Wake up.
823
00:50:24,940 --> 00:50:26,899
- What?
- Good morning.
824
00:50:26,980 --> 00:50:30,229
How do you like your eggs?
825
00:50:30,320 --> 00:50:34,279
- Good morning, Princess!
- What's all this about?
826
00:50:34,360 --> 00:50:38,329
We kind of got off
to a bad start yesterday.
827
00:50:38,410 --> 00:50:40,409
I wanted to make it up to you.
828
00:50:40,490 --> 00:50:45,039
After all, you did rescue me.
829
00:50:45,120 --> 00:50:48,129
- Uh, thanks.
- [ SNIFFS ]
830
00:50:48,210 --> 00:50:52,009
Well, eat up.
We've got a big day ahead of us.
831
00:50:56,470 --> 00:50:58,429
- [ BELCHES ]
- Shrek!
832
00:50:58,510 --> 00:51:00,389
What? It's a compliment.
833
00:51:00,470 --> 00:51:03,429
Better out than in,
I always say. [ LAUGHS ]
834
00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:07,269
Well, it's no way to behave in
front of a princess. - [ BELCHES ]
835
00:51:07,350 --> 00:51:09,979
- Thanks.
- She's as nasty as you are.
836
00:51:10,070 --> 00:51:14,899
[ LAUGHS ] You know,
you're not exactly what I expected.
837
00:51:14,990 --> 00:51:20,079
Maybe you shouldn't judge people
before you get to know them.
838
00:51:20,160 --> 00:51:22,789
♪ [ VOCALISING ] ♪
839
00:51:22,870 --> 00:51:25,159
[ MAN ] La Liberte! Hey!
840
00:51:25,250 --> 00:51:27,169
Princess!
841
00:51:27,250 --> 00:51:29,919
- [ LAUGHS ]
- What are you doing?
842
00:51:30,000 --> 00:51:32,919
Be still, Mon Cherie,
for I am your saviour!
843
00:51:33,010 --> 00:51:37,469
And I am rescuing you from this green...
[ KISSING SOUNDS ]
844
00:51:37,550 --> 00:51:40,099
- beast.
- Hey!
845
00:51:40,180 --> 00:51:42,509
That's my princess!
Go find your own!
846
00:51:42,600 --> 00:51:47,639
Please, monster!
Can't you see I'm a little busy here?
847
00:51:47,730 --> 00:51:51,319
Look, pal, I don't know
who you think you are!
848
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:53,979
Oh! Of course! Oh, how rude.
849
00:51:54,070 --> 00:51:56,149
Please let me introduce myself.
850
00:51:56,240 --> 00:51:59,109
Oh, Merry Men! [ LAUGHS ]
851
00:51:59,200 --> 00:52:03,159
♪ [ ACCORDION ] ♪
852
00:52:03,240 --> 00:52:05,199
♪ Ta, dah, dah, dah, whoo ♪
853
00:52:05,290 --> 00:52:07,369
♪ I steal from the rich ♪
♪ and give to the needy ♪
854
00:52:07,460 --> 00:52:09,739
♪ - He takes a wee percentage ♪
♪ - But I'm not greedy ♪
855
00:52:09,760 --> 00:52:11,669
♪ I rescue pretty damsels ♪
♪ Man, I'm good ♪
856
00:52:11,750 --> 00:52:14,709
♪ - What a guy, Monsieur Hood ♪
♪ - Break it down. ♪
857
00:52:18,430 --> 00:52:20,679
♪ I like an honest fight ♪
♪ and a saucy little maid ♪
858
00:52:20,760 --> 00:52:23,479
♪ - What he's basically saying ♪
♪ is he likes to get... - Paid ♪
859
00:52:23,500 --> 00:52:26,219
♪ - So - When an ogre in the ♪
♪ bush grabs a lady by the tush ♪
860
00:52:26,240 --> 00:52:28,059
♪ - That's bad ♪
♪ - That's bad ♪
861
00:52:28,139 --> 00:52:30,499
♪ When a beauty's with a beast ♪
♪ it makes me awfully mad ♪
862
00:52:30,520 --> 00:52:32,399
♪ He's mad ♪
♪ He's really, really mad ♪
863
00:52:32,479 --> 00:52:34,679
♪ I'll take my blade and ♪
♪ ram it through your heart ♪
864
00:52:34,700 --> 00:52:39,029
♪ Keep your eyes on me, boys ♪
♪ 'cause I'm about to start ♪
865
00:52:39,110 --> 00:52:41,699
[ GRUNTS, GROANS ]
866
00:52:41,780 --> 00:52:44,539
- [ KARATE YELL ]
- [ MERRY MEN GASPING ]
867
00:52:44,620 --> 00:52:47,249
[ PANTING ]
Man, that was annoying!
868
00:52:47,330 --> 00:52:49,079
Oh, you little...
869
00:52:59,130 --> 00:53:01,049
[ Karate Yell ]
870
00:53:04,430 --> 00:53:07,719
♪ [ ACCORDION ] ♪
871
00:53:10,690 --> 00:53:13,519
[ SHOUTING, GROANING ]
872
00:53:13,610 --> 00:53:16,229
[ GROANING ]
873
00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:19,399
[ CHUCKLES ] Um, shall we?
874
00:53:20,740 --> 00:53:23,619
- Ho Id the phone.
- [ GRUNTS ]
875
00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:27,159
Oh! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Hold on now.
876
00:53:27,240 --> 00:53:29,249
- Where did that come from?
- What?
877
00:53:29,330 --> 00:53:32,209
That! Back there.
That was amazing!
878
00:53:32,290 --> 00:53:34,209
Where did you learn that?
879
00:53:34,290 --> 00:53:37,419
Well... [ CHUCKLES ]
When one lives alone,
880
00:53:37,500 --> 00:53:40,259
uh, one has to learn these things
in case there's a...
881
00:53:40,340 --> 00:53:42,969
- There's an arrow in your butt!
- What?
882
00:53:43,050 --> 00:53:46,849
- Oh, would you look at that?
- Oh, no. This is all my fault.
883
00:53:46,930 --> 00:53:48,849
- I'm so sorry.
- Why? What's wrong?
884
00:53:48,930 --> 00:53:52,269
- Shrek's hurt.
- Shrek's hurt. Shrek's hurt? Oh, no, Shrek's gonna die.
885
00:53:52,350 --> 00:53:56,149
- Donkey, I'm okay.
- You can't do this to me. I'm too young for you to die.
886
00:53:56,230 --> 00:53:58,359
Keep your legs elevated.
Turn your head and cough.
887
00:53:58,440 --> 00:54:01,449
- Does anyone know the Heimlich?
- Donkey! Calm down.
888
00:54:01,530 --> 00:54:06,159
If you want to help Shrek, run into the woods
and find me a blue flower with red thorns.
889
00:54:06,240 --> 00:54:09,829
Blue flower, red thorns. Okay,
I'm on it. Blue flower, red thorns.
890
00:54:09,910 --> 00:54:13,369
Don't die, Shrek. If you see
a long tunnel, stay away from the light!
891
00:54:13,460 --> 00:54:16,629
- [ BOTH ] Donkey!
- Oh, yeah. Right. Blue flower, red thorns.
892
00:54:16,710 --> 00:54:18,999
- Blue flower, red thorns.
- What are the flowers for?
893
00:54:19,090 --> 00:54:21,299
- For getting rid of Donkey.
- Ah.
894
00:54:21,380 --> 00:54:23,759
Now you hold still,
and I'll yank this thing out.
895
00:54:23,840 --> 00:54:26,049
Ow! Hey! Easy with the yanking.
896
00:54:26,140 --> 00:54:28,759
- I'm sorry, but it has to come out.
- No, it's tender.
897
00:54:28,850 --> 00:54:30,599
Now, hold on.
898
00:54:30,630 --> 00:54:32,919
- What you're doing is the opposite of help.
- Don't move.
899
00:54:32,940 --> 00:54:35,519
- Look, time out.
- Would you...
900
00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:40,069
[ GRUNTS ]
Okay. What do you propose we do?
901
00:54:40,109 --> 00:54:43,029
Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower,
red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns.
902
00:54:43,050 --> 00:54:45,319
This would be so much easier
if I wasn't colour-blind!
903
00:54:45,410 --> 00:54:47,489
- Blue flower, red thorns.
- [ SHREK ] Ow!
904
00:54:47,570 --> 00:54:49,989
Ho Id on, Shrek! I'm coming!
905
00:54:51,500 --> 00:54:53,619
Ow! Not good.
906
00:54:53,710 --> 00:54:56,249
- Okay. Okay, I can nearly see the head.
- [ GRUNTS ]
907
00:54:56,330 --> 00:54:58,959
- It's just about...
- Ow! Ohh!
908
00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:03,419
Ahem.
909
00:55:03,510 --> 00:55:06,889
Nothing happened.
We were just, uh...
910
00:55:06,970 --> 00:55:09,679
Look, if you wanted to be alone,
all you had to do was ask.
911
00:55:09,760 --> 00:55:13,019
Oh, come on!
That's the last thing on my mind.
912
00:55:13,100 --> 00:55:16,769
The princess here
was just... Ugh!
913
00:55:19,940 --> 00:55:22,649
- Ow!
- Hey, what's that?
914
00:55:22,730 --> 00:55:25,569
[ NERVOUS CHUCKLE ]
That's... Is that blood?
915
00:55:25,650 --> 00:55:27,569
[ SIGHS ]
916
00:55:27,990 --> 00:55:29,579
[ BIRD CHIRPING ]
917
00:55:33,950 --> 00:55:35,869
[ GRUNTS ]
918
00:55:41,880 --> 00:55:45,549
♪ My beloved monster and me ♪
919
00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:51,309
♪ We go everywhere together ♪
920
00:55:51,390 --> 00:55:56,099
♪ Wearing a raincoat ♪
♪ that has four sleeves ♪
921
00:55:56,190 --> 00:56:00,809
♪ - Gets us through all kinds ♪
♪ of weather - Aah! ♪
922
00:56:00,900 --> 00:56:06,149
♪ She will always be ♪
♪ the only thing ♪
923
00:56:06,240 --> 00:56:10,739
♪ That comes between me ♪
♪ and the awful sting ♪
924
00:56:10,820 --> 00:56:15,909
♪ That comes from living in a world ♪
♪ that's so damn mean ♪
925
00:56:21,960 --> 00:56:25,089
[ CROAKS ]
926
00:56:25,170 --> 00:56:29,299
♪ Oh, oh-oh-oh-oh ♪
927
00:56:43,770 --> 00:56:45,729
Hey!
928
00:56:45,820 --> 00:56:49,989
♪ - La-la, la-la, la-la-la-la ♪
♪ - [ BOTH LAUGHING ] ♪
929
00:56:50,070 --> 00:56:54,119
♪ La-la, la-la, la-la ♪
930
00:56:56,120 --> 00:56:58,039
There it is, Princess.
931
00:56:58,120 --> 00:57:00,459
Your future awaits you.
932
00:57:00,540 --> 00:57:02,789
- That's DuLoc?
- Yeah, I know.
933
00:57:02,880 --> 00:57:05,549
You know, Shrek thinks Lord Farquaad's
compensating for something,
934
00:57:05,630 --> 00:57:08,129
which I think means
he has a really... Ow!
935
00:57:08,220 --> 00:57:10,129
Um, I, uh...
936
00:57:10,220 --> 00:57:12,639
- I guess we better move on.
- Sure.
937
00:57:12,720 --> 00:57:14,809
But, Shrek?
938
00:57:14,890 --> 00:57:17,679
- I'm... I'm worried about Donkey.
- [ BLUBBERING ]
939
00:57:17,770 --> 00:57:20,139
- What?
- I mean, look at him.
940
00:57:20,230 --> 00:57:23,229
- He doesn't look so good.
- What are you talking about? I'm fine.
941
00:57:23,310 --> 00:57:28,319
That's what they always say, and then
next thing you know, you're on your back.
942
00:57:28,400 --> 00:57:30,859
- Dead.
- You know, she's right.
943
00:57:30,950 --> 00:57:33,819
You look awful.
Do you want to sit down?
944
00:57:33,910 --> 00:57:36,619
- I'll make you some tea.
- I didn't want to say nothing,
945
00:57:36,699 --> 00:57:39,619
but I got this twinge in my neck,
and when I turn my head like this, look.
946
00:57:39,640 --> 00:57:41,459
- [ BONES CRUNCH ]
- Ow! See?
947
00:57:41,540 --> 00:57:44,140
- Who's hungry? I'll find us some dinner.
- I'll get the firewood.
948
00:57:44,210 --> 00:57:48,709
Hey, where you going?
Oh, man, I can't feel my toes!
949
00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:51,299
I don't have any toes!
950
00:57:51,380 --> 00:57:53,719
I think I need a hug.
951
00:57:57,260 --> 00:57:59,519
Mmm.
952
00:57:59,600 --> 00:58:03,559
Mmm. This is good.
This is really good.
953
00:58:05,770 --> 00:58:08,029
- What is this?
- Uh, weed rat.
954
00:58:08,110 --> 00:58:10,239
Rotisserie style.
955
00:58:10,320 --> 00:58:12,819
No kidding.
956
00:58:12,910 --> 00:58:14,819
Well, this is delicious.
957
00:58:14,910 --> 00:58:16,989
Well, they're also great
in stews.
958
00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:21,329
Now, I don't mean to brag,
but I make a mean weed rat stew.
959
00:58:21,410 --> 00:58:24,959
[ CHUCKLING ]
960
00:58:25,040 --> 00:58:29,169
[ SIGHS ] I guess I'll be dining
a little differently tomorrow night.
961
00:58:29,250 --> 00:58:34,339
[ GULPS ] Maybe you can
come visit me in the swamp sometime.
962
00:58:34,430 --> 00:58:36,599
I'll cook all kinds
of stuff for you.
963
00:58:36,680 --> 00:58:40,559
Swamp toad soup, fish eye tartare...
You name it.
964
00:58:40,640 --> 00:58:43,769
[ CHUCKLES ] I'd like that.
965
00:58:43,850 --> 00:58:47,229
[ SLURPS, LAUGHS ]
966
00:58:50,690 --> 00:58:53,899
♪ See the pyramids ♪
♪ along the Nile ♪
967
00:58:53,990 --> 00:58:56,619
Um, Princess?
968
00:58:56,700 --> 00:59:00,949
♪ - Watch the sun rise from a ♪
♪ tropic isle - Yes, Shrek? ♪
969
00:59:01,040 --> 00:59:04,869
♪ - I, um, I was wondering. - Just ♪
♪ remember, darling all the while ♪
970
00:59:04,960 --> 00:59:07,209
Are you...
971
00:59:07,290 --> 00:59:09,879
♪ You belong to me ♪
972
00:59:09,960 --> 00:59:12,759
[ SIGHS ] Are you gonna eat that?
973
00:59:17,550 --> 00:59:19,469
[ CHUCKLES ]
974
00:59:19,560 --> 00:59:23,639
- Man, isn't this romantic? Just look at that sunset.
- Sunset?
975
00:59:23,730 --> 00:59:26,269
Oh, no! I mean, it's late.
976
00:59:26,350 --> 00:59:28,229
- I-It's very late.
- What?
977
00:59:28,310 --> 00:59:31,229
Wait a minute.
I see what's going on here.
978
00:59:31,320 --> 00:59:34,279
- You're afraid of the dark, aren't you?
- Yes!
979
00:59:34,360 --> 00:59:38,369
Yes, that's it. I'm terrified.
You know, I'd better go inside.
980
00:59:38,450 --> 00:59:41,789
Don't feel bad, Princess. I used to
be afraid of the dark, too, until...
981
00:59:41,870 --> 00:59:44,619
Hey, no, wait.
I'm still afraid of the dark.
982
00:59:44,710 --> 00:59:47,879
- [ SHREK SIGHS ]
- Good night.
983
00:59:47,960 --> 00:59:50,999
Good night.
984
00:59:51,090 --> 00:59:54,129
- [ DOOR CREAKS ]
- [ DONKEY ] Ohh!
985
00:59:54,210 --> 00:59:56,969
Now I really see
what's going on here.
986
00:59:57,050 --> 00:59:58,969
Oh, what are you talking about?
987
00:59:59,050 --> 01:00:01,809
I don't even wanna hear it. Look,
I'm an animal, and I got instincts.
988
01:00:01,890 --> 01:00:04,309
I know you two were digging
on each other. I could feel it.
989
01:00:04,390 --> 01:00:07,229
You're crazy.
I'm just bringing her back to Farquaad.
990
01:00:07,310 --> 01:00:10,649
Oh, come on, Shrek.
Wake up and smell the pheromones.
991
01:00:10,730 --> 01:00:13,399
- Just go on in and tell her how you feel.
- I...
992
01:00:13,480 --> 01:00:17,489
There's nothing to tell.
Besides, even if I did tell her that,
993
01:00:17,570 --> 01:00:19,489
well, you know...
994
01:00:19,570 --> 01:00:23,079
And I'm not saying I do
'cause I don't...
995
01:00:23,160 --> 01:00:25,579
She's a princess, and I'm...
996
01:00:25,660 --> 01:00:28,329
An ogre?
997
01:00:28,420 --> 01:00:31,079
Yeah. An ogre.
998
01:00:31,170 --> 01:00:35,209
- Hey, where you going?
- To get... more firewood.
999
01:00:45,600 --> 01:00:47,679
[ SIGHS ]
1000
01:00:54,820 --> 01:00:56,149
Princess?
1001
01:00:56,240 --> 01:00:58,949
Princess Fiona?
1002
01:01:03,200 --> 01:01:06,039
Princess, where are you?
1003
01:01:06,120 --> 01:01:08,659
[ WINGS FLUTTERING ]
1004
01:01:11,290 --> 01:01:13,789
Princess?
1005
01:01:13,880 --> 01:01:16,799
- [ CREAKING ]
- [ GASPS ]
1006
01:01:16,880 --> 01:01:19,629
It's very spooky in here.
I am not playing no games.
1007
01:01:24,140 --> 01:01:25,889
[ SCREAMS ]
1008
01:01:29,850 --> 01:01:32,269
Aah! Oh, no! No, help!
1009
01:01:32,350 --> 01:01:35,439
- Shh! - Shrek! Shrek! Shrek!
- No, it's okay. It's okay.
1010
01:01:35,520 --> 01:01:38,399
- What did you do with the princess?
- Donkey, I'm the princess.
1011
01:01:38,490 --> 01:01:41,239
- Aah!
- It's me, in this body.
1012
01:01:41,320 --> 01:01:43,869
Oh, my God!
You ate the princess!
1013
01:01:43,950 --> 01:01:45,869
- Can you hear me?
- Donkey!
1014
01:01:45,950 --> 01:01:48,289
- Listen, keep breathing! I'll get you out of there!
- No!
1015
01:01:48,370 --> 01:01:50,829
- Shrek! Shrek! Shrek!
- Shh.
1016
01:01:50,910 --> 01:01:52,749
- Shrek!
- This is me.
1017
01:01:52,830 --> 01:01:54,749
[ MUFFLED MUMBLING ]
1018
01:01:57,880 --> 01:02:00,759
Princess?
1019
01:02:00,840 --> 01:02:04,339
What happened to you?
You're, uh, uh,
1020
01:02:04,430 --> 01:02:06,349
uh, different.
1021
01:02:06,430 --> 01:02:08,679
- I'm ugly, okay?
- Well, yeah!
1022
01:02:08,770 --> 01:02:11,889
Was it something you ate? 'Cause
I told Shrek those rats was a bad idea.
1023
01:02:11,980 --> 01:02:14,519
- You are what you eat, I said. Now...
- No.
1024
01:02:14,610 --> 01:02:17,939
I... I've been this way
as lon as I can remember.
1025
01:02:18,029 --> 01:02:20,589
What do you mean? Look,
I am not never seen you like this before.
1026
01:02:20,610 --> 01:02:23,779
It only happens
when the sun goes down.
1027
01:02:25,160 --> 01:02:28,789
By night one way,
by day another.
1028
01:02:28,870 --> 01:02:30,909
This shall be the norm...
1029
01:02:31,000 --> 01:02:34,119
until you find
true love's first kiss...
1030
01:02:34,210 --> 01:02:38,629
and then take love's true form.
1031
01:02:38,710 --> 01:02:42,259
Ah, that's beautiful.
I didn't know you wrote poetry.
1032
01:02:42,340 --> 01:02:44,259
It's a spell.
1033
01:02:44,340 --> 01:02:46,929
[ SIGHS ]
When I was a little girl,
1034
01:02:47,010 --> 01:02:49,679
a witch cast a spell on me.
1035
01:02:49,770 --> 01:02:52,309
Every night I become this.
1036
01:02:52,390 --> 01:02:56,059
This horrible, ugly beast!
1037
01:02:58,570 --> 01:03:03,609
I was placed in a tower to await the day
my true love would rescue me.
1038
01:03:03,700 --> 01:03:06,279
That's why I have to marry
Lord Farquaad tomorrow...
1039
01:03:06,370 --> 01:03:09,789
before the sun sets
and he sees me...
1040
01:03:11,040 --> 01:03:13,999
like this. [ SOBS ]
1041
01:03:14,080 --> 01:03:17,329
All right, all right. Calm down.
Look, it's not that bad.
1042
01:03:17,420 --> 01:03:21,589
You're not that ugly.
Well, I am not gonna lie. You are ugly.
1043
01:03:21,670 --> 01:03:24,679
But you only look like this at night.
Shrek's ugly 24-7.
1044
01:03:24,760 --> 01:03:28,139
But, Donkey, I'm a princess,
1045
01:03:28,220 --> 01:03:31,809
and this is not how a princess
is meant to look.
1046
01:03:31,890 --> 01:03:35,639
Princess, how 'bout if you
don't marry Farquaad?
1047
01:03:35,730 --> 01:03:37,649
I have to.
1048
01:03:37,730 --> 01:03:40,569
Only my true love's kiss
can break the spell.
1049
01:03:40,650 --> 01:03:44,189
But, you know, um,
you're kind of an ogre,
1050
01:03:44,280 --> 01:03:47,699
and Shrek... well,
you got a lot in common.
1051
01:03:47,780 --> 01:03:49,279
Shrek?
1052
01:03:49,370 --> 01:03:53,199
Princess, I...
Uh, how's it going, first of all?
1053
01:03:53,290 --> 01:03:56,079
Good? Um, good for me too.
1054
01:03:56,170 --> 01:03:58,079
I'm okay.
1055
01:03:58,170 --> 01:04:03,049
I saw this flower and thought of you
because it's pretty and...
1056
01:04:03,130 --> 01:04:07,379
Well, I don't really like it, but I thought
you might like it 'cause you're pretty.
1057
01:04:07,470 --> 01:04:10,679
But I like you anyway.
I'd... uh, uh...
1058
01:04:10,760 --> 01:04:12,759
[ SIGHS ]
1059
01:04:12,850 --> 01:04:16,389
I'm in trouble.
Okay, here we go.
1060
01:04:16,480 --> 01:04:18,979
[ FIONA ]
I can't just marry whoever want.
1061
01:04:19,060 --> 01:04:21,359
Take a good look at me, Donkey.
1062
01:04:21,440 --> 01:04:23,359
I mean, really,
1063
01:04:23,440 --> 01:04:26,109
who could ever love a beast
so hideous and ugly?
1064
01:04:26,200 --> 01:04:28,609
Princess and ugly
don't go together.
1065
01:04:28,700 --> 01:04:31,119
That's why I can't stay here with Shrek.
[ GASPS ]
1066
01:04:31,200 --> 01:04:35,619
My only chance to live happily
ever after is to marry my truelove.
1067
01:04:35,700 --> 01:04:39,119
- [ DEEP SIGH ]
- Don't you see, Donkey?
1068
01:04:39,210 --> 01:04:42,499
That's just how it has to be.
1069
01:04:42,590 --> 01:04:45,629
It's the only way
to break the spell.
1070
01:04:45,710 --> 01:04:48,469
- You at least gotta tell Shrek the truth.
- No!
1071
01:04:48,550 --> 01:04:51,469
You can't breathe a word.
No one must ever know.
1072
01:04:51,549 --> 01:04:54,109
What's the point of being able to talk
if you gotta keep secrets?
1073
01:04:54,130 --> 01:04:56,889
Promise you won't tell. Promise!
1074
01:04:56,980 --> 01:05:00,059
All right, all right.
I won't tell him. But you should.
1075
01:05:00,109 --> 01:05:03,229
I just know before this is over, I'm gonna
need a whole lot of serious therapy.
1076
01:05:03,250 --> 01:05:06,799
- Look at my eye twitching.
- [ DOOR OPENS ]
1077
01:05:25,880 --> 01:05:29,379
[ SNORING ]
1078
01:05:29,470 --> 01:05:33,219
[ FIONA ]
I tell him, I tell him not.
1079
01:05:33,680 --> 01:05:37,679
I tell him, I tell him not.
1080
01:05:37,770 --> 01:05:39,689
I tell him.
1081
01:05:39,770 --> 01:05:41,849
Shrek!
1082
01:05:41,940 --> 01:05:44,479
Shrek, there's something
I want...
1083
01:05:44,570 --> 01:05:47,569
[ SNORING ]
1084
01:06:05,290 --> 01:06:07,499
Shrek.
1085
01:06:08,920 --> 01:06:10,969
- Are you all right?
- Perfect!
1086
01:06:11,050 --> 01:06:13,009
Never been better.
1087
01:06:13,090 --> 01:06:16,389
I... I don't...
There's something I have to tell you.
1088
01:06:16,470 --> 01:06:19,019
You don't have to tell me
anything, Princess.
1089
01:06:19,100 --> 01:06:21,189
- I heard enough last night.
- You heard what I said?
1090
01:06:21,270 --> 01:06:23,189
Every word.
1091
01:06:23,270 --> 01:06:25,439
I thought you'd understand.
1092
01:06:25,520 --> 01:06:27,439
Oh, I understand.
1093
01:06:27,520 --> 01:06:31,109
Like you said, Who could
love a hideous, ugly beast?
1094
01:06:31,200 --> 01:06:33,859
But I thought that
wouldn't matter to you.
1095
01:06:33,950 --> 01:06:35,699
Yeah? Well, it does.
1096
01:06:35,780 --> 01:06:38,199
[ GASPS, SIGHS ]
1097
01:06:38,290 --> 01:06:40,499
- Ah, right on time.
- [ HORSE WHINNIES ]
1098
01:06:40,580 --> 01:06:43,459
Princess, I've brought you
a little something.
1099
01:06:43,540 --> 01:06:47,789
♪ [ FANFARE ] ♪
1100
01:06:47,880 --> 01:06:51,549
[ YAWNS ]
What'd I miss? What'd I miss?
1101
01:06:51,630 --> 01:06:54,259
[ MUFFLED ] Who said that?
Couldn't have been a donkey.
1102
01:06:55,640 --> 01:06:58,099
Princess Fiona.
1103
01:06:58,180 --> 01:07:00,889
As promised. Now hand it over.
1104
01:07:00,970 --> 01:07:05,229
Very well, ogre. The deed
to your swamp, cleared out, as agreed.
1105
01:07:05,310 --> 01:07:09,859
Take it and go
before I change my mind.
1106
01:07:09,940 --> 01:07:12,779
Forgive me, Princess,
for startling you,
1107
01:07:12,860 --> 01:07:14,779
but you startled me,
1108
01:07:14,860 --> 01:07:18,529
for I have never seen
such a radiant beauty before.
1109
01:07:18,620 --> 01:07:21,619
I am Lord Farquaad.
1110
01:07:21,700 --> 01:07:25,579
Lord Farquaad? Oh, no, no.
1111
01:07:25,670 --> 01:07:28,629
[ SNAPS FINGERS ] - Forgive me,
my Lord, for I was just saying...
1112
01:07:28,710 --> 01:07:34,169
a short... farewell.
1113
01:07:34,260 --> 01:07:38,889
That is so sweet. You don't have
to waste good manners on the ogre.
1114
01:07:38,970 --> 01:07:40,889
It's not like it has feelings.
1115
01:07:40,970 --> 01:07:44,939
No, you're right. It doesn't.
1116
01:07:45,020 --> 01:07:49,019
Princess Fiona, beautiful, fair,
flawless Fiona.
1117
01:07:49,110 --> 01:07:52,109
- I ask your hand in marriage.
- [ GASPS ]
1118
01:07:52,190 --> 01:07:57,239
Will you be the perfect bride
for the perfect groom?
1119
01:08:00,530 --> 01:08:05,709
Lord Farquaad, I accept.
Nothing would make...
1120
01:08:05,790 --> 01:08:08,959
Excellent! I'll start the plans,
for tomorrow we wed!
1121
01:08:09,040 --> 01:08:10,959
No! I mean, uh,
1122
01:08:11,040 --> 01:08:13,419
why wait?
1123
01:08:13,510 --> 01:08:17,339
Let's get married today
before the sun sets.
1124
01:08:17,430 --> 01:08:20,139
Oh, anxious, are we?
You're right.
1125
01:08:20,220 --> 01:08:24,139
The sooner, the better.
There's so much to do!
1126
01:08:24,220 --> 01:08:26,559
There's the caterer,
the cake, the band, the guest list.
1127
01:08:26,640 --> 01:08:29,649
Captain, round up some guests!
1128
01:08:29,730 --> 01:08:32,439
[ FIONA ] Fare-thee-well, ogre.
1129
01:08:32,520 --> 01:08:35,109
Shrek, what are you doing?
You're letting her get away.
1130
01:08:35,190 --> 01:08:37,910
- Yeah? So what?
- Shrek, there's something about her you don't know.
1131
01:08:37,990 --> 01:08:40,409
Look, I talked to her
last night. She's...
1132
01:08:40,490 --> 01:08:44,539
I know you talked to her last night.
You're great pals, aren't ta?
1133
01:08:44,620 --> 01:08:48,369
Now, if you two are such good friends,
why don't you follow her home?
1134
01:08:48,460 --> 01:08:50,419
Shrek, I... I wanna go with you.
1135
01:08:50,500 --> 01:08:53,459
I told you, didn't I?
You're not coming home with me.
1136
01:08:53,550 --> 01:08:57,509
I live alone!
My swamp! Me! Nobody else!
1137
01:08:57,590 --> 01:08:59,679
Understand? Nobody!
1138
01:08:59,760 --> 01:09:04,599
Especially useless, pathetic,
annoying, talking donkeys!
1139
01:09:04,680 --> 01:09:07,849
- But I thought...
- Yeah. You know what?
1140
01:09:07,940 --> 01:09:10,149
You thought wrong!
1141
01:09:11,900 --> 01:09:13,819
Shrek.
1142
01:09:19,610 --> 01:09:23,619
♪ I heard there was ♪
♪ a secret chord ♪
1143
01:09:23,700 --> 01:09:26,749
♪ That David played ♪
♪ and it pleased the Lord ♪
1144
01:09:26,830 --> 01:09:31,669
♪ But you don't really ♪
♪ care for music, do ta ♪
1145
01:09:33,420 --> 01:09:36,759
♪ It goes like this ♪
♪ the fourth, the fifth ♪
1146
01:09:36,840 --> 01:09:39,379
♪ The minor fall ♪
♪ the major lift ♪
1147
01:09:39,470 --> 01:09:46,099
♪ The baffled king ♪
♪ composing hallelujah ♪
1148
01:09:46,180 --> 01:09:49,429
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1149
01:09:49,520 --> 01:09:52,939
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1150
01:09:53,020 --> 01:09:56,939
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1151
01:09:57,030 --> 01:10:01,779
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1152
01:10:03,700 --> 01:10:07,199
♪ Baby, I've been here before ♪
1153
01:10:07,290 --> 01:10:10,409
♪ I know this room ♪
♪ I've walked this floor ♪
1154
01:10:10,500 --> 01:10:15,589
♪ I used to live alone ♪
♪ before I knew you ♪
1155
01:10:17,300 --> 01:10:20,379
♪ I've seen your flag ♪
♪ on the marble arch ♪
1156
01:10:20,470 --> 01:10:23,799
♪ But love is not ♪
♪ a victory march ♪
1157
01:10:23,890 --> 01:10:28,309
♪ It's a cold ♪
♪ and it's a broken hallelujah ♪
1158
01:10:29,930 --> 01:10:33,059
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1159
01:10:33,150 --> 01:10:36,269
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1160
01:10:36,360 --> 01:10:39,399
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1161
01:10:39,480 --> 01:10:44,989
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1162
01:10:46,740 --> 01:10:50,579
♪ And all I ever ♪
♪ learned from love ♪
1163
01:10:50,660 --> 01:10:53,039
♪ I show to shoot at someone ♪
1164
01:10:53,120 --> 01:10:55,709
♪ - Who outdrew you ♪
♪ - [ MOANING ] ♪
1165
01:10:55,790 --> 01:10:59,509
♪ And it's not a cry ♪
♪ you can hear at night ♪
1166
01:10:59,590 --> 01:11:02,629
♪ It's not somebody ♪
♪ who's seen the light ♪
1167
01:11:02,720 --> 01:11:09,769
♪ - It's a cold and it's a ♪
♪ broken hallelujah - [ MOANING ] ♪
1168
01:11:09,850 --> 01:11:12,639
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1169
01:11:12,730 --> 01:11:15,979
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1170
01:11:16,060 --> 01:11:19,319
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1171
01:11:19,400 --> 01:11:25,989
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1172
01:11:29,580 --> 01:11:32,579
[ THUMPING SOUND ]
1173
01:11:34,290 --> 01:11:36,289
Donkey?
1174
01:11:36,380 --> 01:11:38,589
- [ GRUNTS ]
- What are you doing?
1175
01:11:38,670 --> 01:11:41,629
I would think, of all people, you would
recognise a wall when you see one.
1176
01:11:41,710 --> 01:11:43,629
Well, yeah.
1177
01:11:43,720 --> 01:11:47,089
But the wall's supposed
to go around my swamp, not through it.
1178
01:11:47,180 --> 01:11:49,969
It is around your half. See,
that's your half, and this is my half.
1179
01:11:50,060 --> 01:11:52,639
Oh! Your half. Hmm.
1180
01:11:52,720 --> 01:11:55,269
Yes, my half.
I helped rescue the princess.
1181
01:11:55,350 --> 01:11:57,599
I did half the work,
I get half the booty.
1182
01:11:57,690 --> 01:12:01,019
Now hand me that big old rock,
the one that looks like your head.
1183
01:12:01,110 --> 01:12:03,439
- Back off!
- No, you back off.
1184
01:12:03,530 --> 01:12:05,529
- This is my swamp!
- Our swamp.
1185
01:12:05,610 --> 01:12:07,529
- Let go, Donkey!
- You let go.
1186
01:12:07,610 --> 01:12:09,579
- Stubborn jackass!
- Smelly ogre.
1187
01:12:09,660 --> 01:12:11,869
Fine!
1188
01:12:11,950 --> 01:12:15,289
- Hey, come back here. I'm not through with you yet.
- Well, I'm through with you.
1189
01:12:15,370 --> 01:12:18,629
Uh-uh. You know,
with you it's always, Me, me, me!
1190
01:12:18,710 --> 01:12:21,299
Well, guess what!
Now it's my turn!
1191
01:12:21,380 --> 01:12:23,509
So you just shut up
and pay attention!
1192
01:12:23,590 --> 01:12:25,549
You are mean to me.
1193
01:12:25,630 --> 01:12:28,139
You insult me and you don't
appreciate anything that I do!
1194
01:12:28,220 --> 01:12:31,309
You're always pushing me around
or pushing me away.
1195
01:12:31,390 --> 01:12:35,229
Oh, yeah? Well, if I treated you
so bad, how come you came back?
1196
01:12:35,310 --> 01:12:38,519
Because that's what friends do!
They forgive each other!
1197
01:12:38,600 --> 01:12:41,819
Oh, yeah. You're right, Donkey.
1198
01:12:41,900 --> 01:12:46,109
I forgive you...
for stabbing me in the back!
1199
01:12:46,200 --> 01:12:51,619
Ohh! You're so wrapped up in layers, onion
boy, you're afraid of your own feelings.
1200
01:12:51,700 --> 01:12:55,159
- Go away!
- There you are, doing it again just like you did to Fiona.
1201
01:12:55,250 --> 01:12:57,829
All she ever do was like you,
maybe even love you.
1202
01:12:57,920 --> 01:13:02,039
Love me? She said I was ugly,
a hideous creature.
1203
01:13:02,130 --> 01:13:04,049
I heard the two of you talking.
1204
01:13:04,130 --> 01:13:06,049
She wasn't talking about you.
1205
01:13:06,130 --> 01:13:08,469
She was talking about, uh,
somebody else.
1206
01:13:11,010 --> 01:13:13,429
She wasn't talking about me?
1207
01:13:13,510 --> 01:13:15,809
Well, then who was
she talking about?
1208
01:13:15,890 --> 01:13:18,651
Uh-uh, no way. I am not saying anything.
You don't wanna listen to me.
1209
01:13:18,690 --> 01:13:20,979
- Right? Right?
- Donkey!
1210
01:13:21,060 --> 01:13:23,609
- No!
- Okay, look.
1211
01:13:23,690 --> 01:13:25,609
I'm sorry, all right?
1212
01:13:27,240 --> 01:13:29,149
Humph.
1213
01:13:30,490 --> 01:13:34,119
[ SIGHS ] I'm sorry.
1214
01:13:34,200 --> 01:13:38,459
I guess I am just a big,
stupid, ugly ogre.
1215
01:13:39,670 --> 01:13:41,629
Can you forgive me?
1216
01:13:43,840 --> 01:13:45,749
Hey, that's what friends
are for, right?
1217
01:13:45,840 --> 01:13:48,509
Right. Friends?
1218
01:13:48,590 --> 01:13:50,509
Friends.
1219
01:13:50,590 --> 01:13:53,549
So, um,
1220
01:13:53,640 --> 01:13:55,889
what did Fiona say about me?
1221
01:13:55,970 --> 01:13:59,099
What are you asking me for?
Why don't you just go ask her?
1222
01:13:59,180 --> 01:14:02,189
The wedding!
We'll never make it in time.
1223
01:14:02,270 --> 01:14:05,479
Ha-ha-ha! Never fear, for where
there's a will, there's a way,
1224
01:14:05,570 --> 01:14:07,689
and I have a way. [ WHISTLES ]
1225
01:14:12,070 --> 01:14:14,529
- Donkey?
- [ DONKEY LAUGHING ]
1226
01:14:14,620 --> 01:14:16,989
I guess it's just
my animal magnetism.
1227
01:14:17,080 --> 01:14:20,249
[ LAUGHING ] Aw, come here, you.
1228
01:14:20,330 --> 01:14:23,129
All right, all right. Don't get
all slobbery. No one likes a kiss ass.
1229
01:14:23,210 --> 01:14:25,749
All right, hop on
and hold on tight.
1230
01:14:25,840 --> 01:14:29,339
I haven't had a chance to
install the seat belts yet.
1231
01:14:35,760 --> 01:14:38,269
[ DONKEY LAUGHING ] Whoo!
1232
01:14:51,780 --> 01:14:55,659
[ BELLS TOLLING ]
1233
01:14:58,790 --> 01:15:00,909
[ ALL GASPING ]
1234
01:15:01,000 --> 01:15:03,539
People of DuLoc,
1235
01:15:03,620 --> 01:15:06,289
we gather here today...
1236
01:15:06,380 --> 01:15:08,419
to bear witness...
1237
01:15:08,500 --> 01:15:10,419
- to the union...
- Um...
1238
01:15:10,510 --> 01:15:12,969
- Of our new king...
- Excuse me.
1239
01:15:13,050 --> 01:15:15,719
- Could we just skip ahead to the I do's?
- [ CHUCKLING ]
1240
01:15:15,800 --> 01:15:17,719
Go on.
1241
01:15:22,770 --> 01:15:26,399
Go ahead, have some fun. If we
need you, I'll whistle. How about that?
1242
01:15:29,020 --> 01:15:30,939
Shrek, wait, wait!
Wait a minute!
1243
01:15:31,030 --> 01:15:33,699
- You wanna do this right, don't you?
- What are you talking about?
1244
01:15:33,780 --> 01:15:35,699
There's a line you
gotta wait for.
1245
01:15:35,780 --> 01:15:38,279
The preacher's gonna say, Speak now
or forever hold your peace.
1246
01:15:38,370 --> 01:15:42,119
- That's when you say, I object!
- I don't have time for this!
1247
01:15:42,200 --> 01:15:43,909
Wait. What are you doing?
Listen to me!
1248
01:15:44,000 --> 01:15:45,919
- Look, you love this woman, don't you?
- Yes.
1249
01:15:46,000 --> 01:15:47,289
- You wanna hold her?
- Yes.
1250
01:15:47,380 --> 01:15:49,589
- Please her?
- Yes!
1251
01:15:49,670 --> 01:15:52,299
♪ Then you got to, got to ♪
♪ try a little tenderness ♪
1252
01:15:52,380 --> 01:15:55,129
- The chicks love that romantic crap!
- All right! Cut it out.
1253
01:15:55,220 --> 01:15:58,849
- When does this guy say the line?
- We gotta check it out.
1254
01:15:58,930 --> 01:16:02,099
- [ DONKEY GRUNTING ]
- And so, by the power vested in me,
1255
01:16:02,180 --> 01:16:05,439
- [ SHREK ] What do you see?
- The whole town's in there.
1256
01:16:05,520 --> 01:16:08,649
- I now pronounce you husband and wife,
- They're at the altar.
1257
01:16:08,730 --> 01:16:11,279
- King and queen.
- Mother Fletcher! He already said it.
1258
01:16:11,360 --> 01:16:13,989
- Oh, for the love of Pete!
- [ GRUNTS ]
1259
01:16:15,240 --> 01:16:17,279
I object!
1260
01:16:17,360 --> 01:16:19,449
- Shrek?
- [ GASPS ]
1261
01:16:19,530 --> 01:16:21,449
Oh, now what does he want?
1262
01:16:21,540 --> 01:16:24,959
[ CROWD CLAMOURING ]
1263
01:16:25,040 --> 01:16:28,079
Hi, everyone.
Having a good time, are ta?
1264
01:16:28,170 --> 01:16:30,379
I love DuLoc, first of all.
1265
01:16:30,460 --> 01:16:32,959
- Very clean.
- What are you doing here?
1266
01:16:33,050 --> 01:16:35,969
Really, it's rude enough
being alive when no one wants you,
1267
01:16:36,050 --> 01:16:39,389
- but showing up uninvited to a wedding...
- Fiona!
1268
01:16:39,470 --> 01:16:42,469
- I need to talk to you.
- Oh, now you wanna talk?
1269
01:16:42,560 --> 01:16:45,519
It's a little late for that,
so if you'll excuse me...
1270
01:16:45,600 --> 01:16:47,979
- But you can't marry him.
- And why not?
1271
01:16:48,060 --> 01:16:51,939
Because... Because he's just
marrying you so he can be king.
1272
01:16:52,020 --> 01:16:54,399
Outrageous!
Fiona, don't listen to him.
1273
01:16:54,480 --> 01:16:58,109
- He's not your true love.
- And what do you know about true love?
1274
01:16:58,200 --> 01:17:00,569
Well, I... Uh...
1275
01:17:00,660 --> 01:17:04,039
- I mean...
- Oh, this is precious.
1276
01:17:04,120 --> 01:17:08,789
[ CHUCKLING ] The ogre
has fallen in love with the princess!
1277
01:17:08,870 --> 01:17:11,129
- Oh, good Lord.
- [ CROWD LAUGHING ]
1278
01:17:11,210 --> 01:17:13,129
An ogre and a princess!
1279
01:17:13,210 --> 01:17:16,469
[ LAUGHING CONTINUES ]
1280
01:17:18,760 --> 01:17:21,259
Shrek, is this true?
1281
01:17:22,680 --> 01:17:25,219
Who cares? It's preposterous!
1282
01:17:25,310 --> 01:17:28,939
Fiona, my love, we're but a kiss away
from our happily ever after.
1283
01:17:29,020 --> 01:17:31,609
Now kiss me! Mmmm!
1284
01:17:35,690 --> 01:17:39,029
By night one way,
by day another.
1285
01:17:40,950 --> 01:17:43,699
I wanted to show you before.
1286
01:18:02,590 --> 01:18:06,179
- [ WHIMPERS ]
- [ CROWD GASPING ]
1287
01:18:06,270 --> 01:18:08,809
Well, uh,
1288
01:18:08,890 --> 01:18:10,889
that explains a lot.
1289
01:18:10,980 --> 01:18:14,649
[ FARQUAAD ] Ugh! It's disgusting!
1290
01:18:14,730 --> 01:18:16,779
Guards! Guards!
1291
01:18:16,860 --> 01:18:20,029
I order you to get that
out of my sight now! Get them!
1292
01:18:20,110 --> 01:18:22,909
- Get them both!
- No, no!
1293
01:18:22,990 --> 01:18:26,739
This hocus-pocus alters nothing. This
marriage is binding, and that makes me king!
1294
01:18:26,830 --> 01:18:29,119
- See? See?
- No, let go of me! Shrek!
1295
01:18:29,159 --> 01:18:31,279
No! - [ FARQUAAD ] Don't just
stand there, you morons.
1296
01:18:31,300 --> 01:18:33,839
Get out of my way! Fiona!
1297
01:18:36,210 --> 01:18:38,709
Arrgh!
1298
01:18:38,800 --> 01:18:41,799
I'll make you regret the day we met.
I'll see you drawn and quartered!
1299
01:18:41,880 --> 01:18:44,799
- You'll beg for death to save you!
- No! Shrek!
1300
01:18:44,890 --> 01:18:48,389
- And as for you, my wife,
- Fiona!
1301
01:18:48,470 --> 01:18:51,139
I'll have you locked back in that tower
for the rest of your days!
1302
01:18:51,230 --> 01:18:53,059
- I am king!
- [ WHISTLES ]
1303
01:18:53,150 --> 01:18:56,939
I will have order!
I will have perfection! I will have...
1304
01:18:58,230 --> 01:19:01,279
Aaah!
1305
01:19:01,360 --> 01:19:04,109
- Aah!
- All right. Nobody move.
1306
01:19:04,200 --> 01:19:06,279
I got a dragon here,
and I'm not afraid to use it.
1307
01:19:06,370 --> 01:19:08,989
- [ DRAGON ROARS ]
- I'm a donkey on the edge!
1308
01:19:10,410 --> 01:19:13,579
- [ BELCHES ]
- [ DONKEY LAUGHS ]
1309
01:19:13,670 --> 01:19:16,079
Celebrity marriages.
They never last, do they?
1310
01:19:16,170 --> 01:19:18,169
[ CHEERING ]
1311
01:19:18,250 --> 01:19:20,089
Go ahead, Shrek.
1312
01:19:21,470 --> 01:19:23,759
Uh, Fiona?
1313
01:19:24,890 --> 01:19:27,099
Yes, Shrek?
1314
01:19:27,180 --> 01:19:31,229
I... I love you.
1315
01:19:31,310 --> 01:19:33,559
Really?
1316
01:19:34,650 --> 01:19:37,649
Really, really.
1317
01:19:37,730 --> 01:19:39,649
I love you too.
1318
01:19:45,110 --> 01:19:46,779
[ ALL ] Aawww!
1319
01:19:48,700 --> 01:19:51,949
[ FIONA'S VOICE ] Until you
find truelove's first kiss...
1320
01:19:52,040 --> 01:19:55,329
[ ECHOING ]
and then take love's true form.
1321
01:20:18,900 --> 01:20:21,819
[ ECHOING CONTINUES ] Take love's
true form. Take love's true form.
1322
01:20:27,990 --> 01:20:30,489
Fiona?
1323
01:20:33,000 --> 01:20:35,579
Fiona.
1324
01:20:35,660 --> 01:20:38,209
Are you all right?
1325
01:20:38,290 --> 01:20:40,209
Well, yes.
1326
01:20:40,290 --> 01:20:43,549
But I don't understand.
1327
01:20:43,630 --> 01:20:45,759
I'm supposed to be beautiful.
1328
01:20:48,470 --> 01:20:50,719
But you are beautiful.
1329
01:20:50,800 --> 01:20:53,019
[ CHUCKLES ]
1330
01:20:53,270 --> 01:20:55,729
I was hoping this would be
a happy ending.
1331
01:20:59,520 --> 01:21:03,939
♪ I thought love was only true ♪
♪ in fairy tales ♪
1332
01:21:04,030 --> 01:21:05,489
[ ALL ] Oy!
1333
01:21:05,570 --> 01:21:09,279
♪ Meant for someone else ♪
♪ but not for me ♪
1334
01:21:11,700 --> 01:21:14,659
♪ Love was out to get me ♪
1335
01:21:14,750 --> 01:21:17,539
♪ That's the way it seemed ♪
1336
01:21:17,620 --> 01:21:22,089
♪ Disappointment ♪
♪ haunted all my dreams ♪
1337
01:21:22,170 --> 01:21:25,459
♪ And then I saw her face ♪
1338
01:21:25,550 --> 01:21:28,339
♪ Now I'm a believer ♪
1339
01:21:28,430 --> 01:21:30,969
♪ And not a trace ♪
1340
01:21:31,050 --> 01:21:33,809
♪ Of doubt in my mind ♪
1341
01:21:33,890 --> 01:21:37,939
♪ - I'm in love ♪
♪ - Ooh-ahh ♪
1342
01:21:38,020 --> 01:21:40,479
♪ I'm a believer ♪
♪ I couldn't leave her ♪
1343
01:21:40,560 --> 01:21:42,769
♪ If I tried ♪
1344
01:21:42,860 --> 01:21:46,899
God bless us, every one.
1345
01:21:46,990 --> 01:21:50,529
♪ Come on, y'all! ♪
♪ Then I saw her face Ha-ha! ♪
1346
01:21:50,610 --> 01:21:53,739
♪ Now I'm a believer ♪
♪ Listen! ♪
1347
01:21:53,830 --> 01:21:56,619
♪ Not a trace ♪
1348
01:21:56,700 --> 01:21:59,499
♪ Of doubt in my mind ♪
1349
01:21:59,580 --> 01:22:02,839
♪ I'm in love ♪
♪ Ooh-ahh ♪
1350
01:22:02,920 --> 01:22:07,169
♪ I'm a believer ♪
♪ I couldn't leave her if I tried ♪
1351
01:22:07,260 --> 01:22:10,129
- Ooh!
- Uh!
1352
01:22:10,220 --> 01:22:12,799
♪ Then I saw her face ♪
1353
01:22:12,890 --> 01:22:15,849
♪ Now I'm a believer ♪
♪ Hey! ♪
1354
01:22:15,930 --> 01:22:18,729
♪ Not a trace ♪
♪ Uhh! Yeah. ♪
1355
01:22:18,810 --> 01:22:22,059
♪ Of doubt in my mind ♪
♪ One more time! ♪
1356
01:22:22,150 --> 01:22:26,689
♪ I'm in love ♪
♪ I'm a believer ♪
1357
01:22:26,780 --> 01:22:28,609
Come on!
1358
01:22:28,690 --> 01:22:30,610
♪ I believe, I believe ♪
♪ I believe, I believe ♪
1359
01:22:30,700 --> 01:22:33,369
♪ I believe, I believe ♪
♪ I believe, I believe, I believe, hey ♪
1360
01:22:33,450 --> 01:22:36,029
♪ Y'all sing it with me! ♪
♪ I ♪
1361
01:22:36,120 --> 01:22:37,789
♪ Believe ♪
1362
01:22:37,870 --> 01:22:40,829
♪ I believe ♪
♪ People in the back! ♪
1363
01:22:40,910 --> 01:22:43,829
♪ - I believe ♪
♪ - I'm a believer ♪
1364
01:22:43,920 --> 01:22:46,879
♪ I believe ♪
1365
01:22:46,960 --> 01:22:49,839
♪ I believe ♪
1366
01:22:49,920 --> 01:22:54,339
♪ I believe ♪
1367
01:22:54,430 --> 01:22:56,679
[ HYSTERICAL LAUGHING ]
1368
01:22:56,760 --> 01:22:59,019
Oh, that's funny. Oh. Oh.
1369
01:22:59,100 --> 01:23:01,729
I can't breathe.
I can't breathe.
1370
01:23:02,640 --> 01:23:04,939
♪ I believe in self-assertion ♪
1371
01:23:05,020 --> 01:23:07,189
♪ Destiny or ♪
♪ as light diversion ♪
1372
01:23:07,270 --> 01:23:11,569
♪ Now it seems ♪
♪ I've got my head on straight ♪
1373
01:23:11,650 --> 01:23:13,779
♪ I'm a freak ♪
♪ an apparition ♪
1374
01:23:13,860 --> 01:23:15,989
♪ Seems I've made ♪
♪ the right decision ♪
1375
01:23:16,070 --> 01:23:19,699
♪ To try to turn back now ♪
♪ it might be too late ♪
1376
01:23:19,790 --> 01:23:24,119
♪ - I want to stay home today ♪
♪ - Don't wanna go out ♪
1377
01:23:24,210 --> 01:23:28,549
♪ - If anyone comes to play ♪
♪ - Gonna get thrown out ♪
1378
01:23:28,630 --> 01:23:32,969
♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪
♪ - Don't want no company ♪
1379
01:23:33,050 --> 01:23:35,509
♪ No way ♪
1380
01:23:35,590 --> 01:23:38,259
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
1381
01:23:38,350 --> 01:23:40,559
♪ I wanna be a millionaire ♪
♪ some day ♪
1382
01:23:40,640 --> 01:23:42,809
♪ But know what it feels like ♪
♪ to give it away ♪
1383
01:23:42,890 --> 01:23:46,309
♪ Watch me march ♪
♪ to the beat of my own drum ♪
1384
01:23:46,400 --> 01:23:48,979
♪ And it's off to the moon ♪
♪ and then back again ♪
1385
01:23:49,070 --> 01:23:51,149
♪ Same old day ♪
♪ Same situation ♪
1386
01:23:51,240 --> 01:23:55,409
♪ My happiness rears back ♪
♪ as if to say ♪
1387
01:23:55,490 --> 01:23:59,789
♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪
♪ - Don't wanna go out ♪
1388
01:23:59,870 --> 01:24:04,249
♪ - If anyone comes my way ♪
♪ - Gonna get thrown out ♪
1389
01:24:04,330 --> 01:24:08,749
♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪
♪ - Don't want no company ♪
1390
01:24:08,840 --> 01:24:11,299
♪ No way ♪
1391
01:24:11,380 --> 01:24:14,009
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
1392
01:24:17,850 --> 01:24:22,679
♪ I wanna stay home ♪
♪ stay home, stay home ♪
1393
01:24:22,770 --> 01:24:27,809
♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪
♪ - Don't wanna go out ♪
1394
01:24:27,900 --> 01:24:32,189
♪ - If anyone comes to play ♪
♪ - Gonna get thrown out ♪
1395
01:24:32,280 --> 01:24:35,109
♪ I wanna stay home today ♪
1396
01:24:35,200 --> 01:24:39,199
♪ Don't want no company ♪
♪ No way ♪
1397
01:24:39,280 --> 01:24:42,119
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
1398
01:24:55,920 --> 01:24:59,889
♪ I get such a thrill ♪
♪ when you looking my eyes ♪
1399
01:24:59,970 --> 01:25:04,139
♪ My heart skips a beat ♪
♪ Girl, I feel so alive ♪
1400
01:25:04,220 --> 01:25:07,979
♪ Please tell me, baby ♪
♪ if all this is true ♪
1401
01:25:08,060 --> 01:25:12,149
♪ 'Cause deep down inside ♪
♪ all I wanted was you ♪
1402
01:25:12,230 --> 01:25:16,149
♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪
♪ Makes me wanna dance ♪
1403
01:25:16,240 --> 01:25:20,119
♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪
♪ It's a new romance ♪
1404
01:25:20,200 --> 01:25:24,159
♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪
♪ I look into your eyes ♪
1405
01:25:24,240 --> 01:25:28,119
♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪
♪ The best years of our lives ♪
1406
01:25:28,210 --> 01:25:31,999
♪ When we first met ♪
♪ I could hardly believe ♪
1407
01:25:32,090 --> 01:25:36,049
♪ The things that would happen ♪
♪ and we could achieve ♪
1408
01:25:36,130 --> 01:25:39,839
♪ So let's be together ♪
♪ for all of our time ♪
1409
01:25:39,930 --> 01:25:43,809
♪ Oh, girl, I'm so thankful ♪
♪ that you are still mine ♪
1410
01:25:43,890 --> 01:25:45,969
♪ You always consider me ♪
♪ like an ugly duckling ♪
1411
01:25:46,060 --> 01:25:48,576
♪ And treat me like a Nostradamus ♪
♪ was why I had to get my shine on ♪
1412
01:25:48,600 --> 01:25:50,680
♪ I break a little something ♪
♪ to keep my mind on ♪
1413
01:25:50,730 --> 01:25:53,149
♪ 'Cause you had my mind gone ♪
♪ Eh-eh, eh-eh, eh-eh ♪
1414
01:25:53,230 --> 01:25:56,069
♪ Turn the lights on, Come on, baby ♪
♪ Let's just rewind the song ♪
1415
01:25:56,149 --> 01:25:58,869
♪ 'Cause all I want to do is ♪
♪ make the rest years the best years ♪
1416
01:25:58,890 --> 01:26:00,359
♪ All night long ♪
1417
01:26:00,450 --> 01:26:04,159
♪ - Oh-oh-oh, makes me wanna dance ♪
♪ - Makes me wanna dance ♪
1418
01:26:04,240 --> 01:26:08,159
♪ - Oh-oh-oh, it's a new romance ♪
♪ - It's a new romance ♪
1419
01:26:08,250 --> 01:26:11,419
♪ - Oh-oh-oh, I look into your eyes ♪
♪ - Oh, yeah, yeah ♪
1420
01:26:11,500 --> 01:26:14,169
♪ - Look into your eyes ♪
♪ - Oh-oh-oh ♪
1421
01:26:14,250 --> 01:26:16,769
♪ - The best years of our lives ♪
♪ - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
1422
01:26:16,790 --> 01:26:20,179
♪ - Oh-oh-oh, makes me wanna dance ♪
♪ - Whoa-oh-oh, dance, yeah ♪
1423
01:26:20,260 --> 01:26:24,179
♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪
♪ It's a new romance ♪
1424
01:26:24,260 --> 01:26:28,229
♪ - Oh-oh-oh, I look into your eyes ♪
♪ - Look into your eyes, yeah ♪
1425
01:26:28,310 --> 01:26:32,939
♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪
♪ The best years of our lives ♪
1426
01:26:33,020 --> 01:26:35,859
♪ Everything looks bright ♪
1427
01:26:35,940 --> 01:26:38,189
♪ Standing in your light ♪
1428
01:26:38,280 --> 01:26:40,609
♪ Everything feels right ♪
1429
01:26:40,700 --> 01:26:43,779
♪ What's left is out of sight ♪
1430
01:26:43,870 --> 01:26:48,449
♪ What's a girl to do I'm ♪
♪ telling you You're on my mind ♪
1431
01:26:48,540 --> 01:26:51,119
♪ I wanna be with you ♪
1432
01:26:51,210 --> 01:26:53,499
♪ 'Cause when you're ♪
♪ standing next to me ♪
1433
01:26:53,580 --> 01:26:55,499
♪ It's like wow ♪
1434
01:26:55,590 --> 01:26:58,709
♪ And all your kisses ♪
♪ seem to set me free ♪
1435
01:26:58,800 --> 01:27:00,629
♪ It's like wow ♪
1436
01:27:00,720 --> 01:27:04,049
♪ And when we touch it's such ♪
♪ a rush I can't get enough ♪
1437
01:27:04,140 --> 01:27:06,809
♪ It's like... It's like ♪
♪ Ooh-ooh ♪
1438
01:27:06,890 --> 01:27:09,429
♪ Hey, what ♪
1439
01:27:09,520 --> 01:27:12,809
♪ It's like wow ♪
♪ Ooh-ooh, hey ♪
1440
01:27:12,900 --> 01:27:16,149
♪ Hey, yeah ♪
♪ It's like wow ♪
1441
01:27:16,230 --> 01:27:19,859
♪ Everything is looking ♪
♪ right now, right now ♪
1442
01:27:19,940 --> 01:27:23,159
♪ - It's like wow ♪
♪ - And I got this feeling ♪
1443
01:27:23,240 --> 01:27:26,119
♪ This feeling ♪
♪ it's just like wow ♪
1444
01:27:26,200 --> 01:27:28,449
♪ It's just like wow ♪
1445
01:27:28,540 --> 01:27:30,499
♪ - You are all I'm thinking of. ♪
♪ - Like wow ♪
1446
01:27:30,580 --> 01:27:34,959
♪ Everything feels right ♪
♪ Everything feels right ♪
1447
01:27:35,040 --> 01:27:37,459
♪ - Like wow ♪
♪ - Everything looks bright ♪
1448
01:27:37,540 --> 01:27:40,129
All my senses are right.
1449
01:27:40,210 --> 01:27:42,589
♪ - Like wow ♪
♪ - Everything feels right ♪
1450
01:27:42,670 --> 01:27:46,009
♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪
♪ the way I'm feeling you ♪
1451
01:27:46,090 --> 01:27:48,009
♪ Is like wow ♪
1452
01:27:48,100 --> 01:27:51,019
♪ [ INSTRUMENTAL ] ♪
1453
01:28:08,620 --> 01:28:12,159
♪ There is something ♪
♪ that I see ♪
1454
01:28:12,250 --> 01:28:15,669
♪ In the way ♪
♪ you look at me ♪
1455
01:28:15,750 --> 01:28:19,169
♪ There's a smile ♪
♪ There's a truth ♪
1456
01:28:19,250 --> 01:28:22,669
♪ In your eyes ♪
1457
01:28:22,760 --> 01:28:26,089
♪ What an unexpected way ♪
1458
01:28:26,180 --> 01:28:29,559
♪ On this unexpected day ♪
1459
01:28:29,640 --> 01:28:31,559
♪ Could it be ♪
1460
01:28:31,640 --> 01:28:36,559
♪ This is where I belong ♪
1461
01:28:36,650 --> 01:28:40,019
♪ It is you I have loved ♪
1462
01:28:40,110 --> 01:28:43,109
♪ All along ♪
1463
01:28:43,190 --> 01:28:46,909
♪ There's no more mystery ♪
1464
01:28:46,990 --> 01:28:50,449
♪ It is finally clear to me ♪
1465
01:28:50,530 --> 01:28:54,199
♪ You're the home ♪
♪ my heart's searched for ♪
1466
01:28:54,290 --> 01:28:57,289
♪ So long ♪
1467
01:28:57,370 --> 01:29:00,959
♪ It is you I have loved ♪
1468
01:29:01,040 --> 01:29:04,969
♪ All along ♪
1469
01:29:32,160 --> 01:29:35,999
♪ Whoa, over and over ♪
1470
01:29:36,080 --> 01:29:41,169
♪ I'm filled with emotion ♪
1471
01:29:41,250 --> 01:29:44,209
♪ As I look ♪
1472
01:29:44,300 --> 01:29:48,929
♪ Into your perfect face ♪
117097
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.