All language subtitles for Jaoon.Kahan.Bata.Ae.Dil.WEBRip.Netflix.en

My love, I lost to you.

You have won my heart.

Why, then, do you still fight me?

I have lost repeatedly to you, my love.

Let it go, my love.

My amour...

My sweetheart...

Let's talk, my love.
Please talk, my love.

Let me speak a little.
You listen a little.

You chat a little, too...
Let me listen.

Why do you sulk, my love?

I try, but you are so stubborn!

This is the time for love.
Why are you peeved?

My amour...

My sweetheart...

Let's talk, my love.
Please talk, my love.

Do you know how much
cigarettes cost nowadays?

Probably less than lung cancer treatment.

This city's pollution
will give us cancer anyway.

If not now, then ten years later.

Scold me.

What?

I'm late right? So scold me now,

else you'll look for
excuses to vent it out.

I know it. So don't keep me on edge.
Scold me and be done with it.

Don't try to be my boss.

I'll do whatever, whenever I want to.

Let's go.

That's a nice dress.

You noticed? Nice, isn't it?

I told Sunita.

Of late, all she does is
find fault with me, jealous bitch!

She had a break up, right?

Give her a few weeks,
she'll find another idiot to trap.

What do you mean?

Sunita isn't like that.

Her ex-boyfriend was just an asshole.

Whenever he dropped her at the hostel,
he'd leer at me, that pig.

When I'd tell Sunita, she'd get mad at me.
As if I was enticing him!

Always falls for the wrong guys,
that poor girl.

Good for her.

Before she gets bored of the guy,
the guy dumps her

Everyone stays happy!

Happy?

That's your problem.

You barely meet someone,
and you instantly judge them.

About everything - who they are,
what they do...

Poor Sunita.

I know how hard the break-up was on her.

She even attempted suicide twice.

You won't understand!

Some people just love being fucked over.

They're addicted to suffering.

Your dear Sunita is of the same breed.

There's no drama in her life -

The same boring job and salary.

Love. Sex. Fights, Breakups.

That's how she entertains herself.

Mark my words,
she'll have at least two marriages,

four extramarital affairs
and three divorces.

You never find anything good in anyone.

What's good and bad in this?

And when did I claim to
be arbiter of absolute truth?

Doesn't everyone judge one another?

I just don't make any bones about it.

If you really think of it, you'll find
vices in Aamir Khan (film actor)

and virtues in Salman Khan (film actor).

What matters is whose film is a hit.

Also, a film that seems stupid now,
could become a future classic

and one that's great
now might age terribly.

Earlier, women pursuing education
were berated. That's no longer the case.

The future could turn the tables again.

If ideas of good
and bad can change with time...

Why must I carry the burden of morality?

Stop preaching. Tell me frankly...

Everyone has something good in them,
right?

So tell me what you like about Sunita?

Tell me!

Her voice.

Her voice?

It's so hoarse.

Like Vidya Balan, Priyanka Chopra,
Rani Mukherjee...

So did I say she sounds like
Lata Mangeshkar,

Shreya Ghoshal or Kavita Krishnamurti?

So?

That's what! When she gets fucked,
imagine how hot she sounds!

How many times have I told
you not to talk dirty about women?

It's not dirty.

Right. "Not dirty. Just truth!"

Correct.

And not just girls and sex, I speak
my mind about anything and everything.

And it'll be a crime if you don't?

Yes!

For work's sake, I've stopped
being completely honest with the world.

I'll have to do the same with you,
with this attitude of yours.

And if that happens,
I'll end up barely talking to you.

Fine. Say whatever you want.
I won't say a thing.

No, say it. What's the fun otherwise?

So you hurt me just for fun?

Look. No, actually just listen.
And understand this now.

You have some delusions about
how life is and should be!

If you didn't have them,
you wouldn't get hurt.

I don't say anything
to intentionally hurt you.

But when you hurt yourself
with your stupidity, it delights me.

It's as funny as watching one's
own father slip on a banana peel.

Slipping can break one's bones too,
you know.

I love you - which is why I tolerate you.

If it was someone else, I'd most likely...

If it wasn't you,
even I'd be different, wouldn't I?

Where are we going?

What road are we travelling?
What road are we travelling?

There's no destination in sight...

There's no destination in sight...

Tell me.

You really don't know?

No.

I had messaged you.

I told you I'm facing
issues with WhatsApp!

Even my boss's message about
the meeting reached me this morning.

I had to run out without breakfast.

And they don't let us
check our phones in office.

That's good.

Smartphones are only
making people more stupid.

Don't you also use a smartphone?

I have business with stupid people.

Why should I sacrifice
my business for my beliefs?

Just tell me where we are going!

Tell me this, if you didn't know where
we're headed, why didn't you ask before?

How does it matter...
as long as you're with me, love!

And yet you did ask.

It's pointless speaking to you.

We're going to Gulshan Café.

I haven't eaten a thing
since morning either.

Why, love?

Some clients had come to meet Malvani.

Who Malvani? The CA?

Didn't you guys fight the last time?

Yes, we did.

Then?

He's also a hardcore CA.

And from a community known for shrewdness.

He knew I was in a tight spot.

His dumb ass-licking employees
are good for nothing.

He had no option but to hire me to convert
his client's black money into white.

You'll get a fat commission now, right?

Fat my ass! Whatever I earn,
half will go into paying loans.

The rest must be saved until the next job.

You were the one crazy about stocks
and Bitcoin! Betting your money online.

Didn't I warn you against gambling?

Must be fun telling me, "I told you so!"
"I told you so!"

You think I'm happy that you lost money?

Because I act smart in front of you,

must be fun to see me fail.

Anyway,

no use crying over spilled milk.

This country's economy is fucked anyway.

Big businessmen are taking money
from banks and fleeing the country...

Or just saving their asses
by bribing the government.

Till election funding is sorted out,
no party will touch these guys.

News Channels have also
become pimps for these parties.

And these stupid voters will elect the
same guys who have fucked them in the ass.

Honesty and hard work
won't earn enough money.

That's why I invested in the share
market and Bitcoin. That didn't work.

Next time, I'll invest again.
Someday, I'll hit the jackpot.

Till then, you can scoff at me.

Okay fine. I'm sorry.

At least, today you made money, right?
Let's celebrate then.

So should I order you a chariot?

Isn't that why we are
going to Café Gulshan!

These cabbies have become
arrogant assholes! None will stop.

Listen,

Today I'll pay at the hotel.

For what joy?

It'll be half and half like always.

Let it go. Today's a reason to celebrate.

That reason is mine. Not yours!

Why do you talk like that?

Don't hurt me so much
that my heart breaks one day.

If your heart is so weak,
it is better if it breaks.

There's no place for
the weak in this world

I'm not weak.

You make me weak.

Blaming others for one's own weakness is
the first sign of a weak person, my dear.

Whether you read the Gita or the Quran.

If you take refuge in love to
hide your frailties, you've already lost.

I don't want your weakness
to affect me. Come on.

Can you never speak nicely to me?

Do you never get bored
asking the same question?

If I am so boring,
then you should leave me.

Sorry.

I really am.

I'm not saying you're boring.

It's just this habit of yours.

What are you doing in front of people?

Are they your relatives?

What can they do anyway?

There is something called
public decency, mister.

See the videos in the secret folders
on people's phones.

You'll see how decent they are.

That reminds me,
let's shoot it on the phone today.

What did I tell you last time?

You said no.

And why did I say no?

What if the phone gets stolen,
lost or hacked?

Yes. So, what has changed since then?

Nothing.

You still don't trust me.

Where does trust come into this?

Exactly, there is no trust.

You always find ways to twist my words.

You're too smart, eh?

Knowing you'd lose the argument,
you just changed the topic.

Losing, winning...

Love isn't a contest!

-Is it not?
-No.

Are you so dumb?

Wait a sec.

I just called you smart,

but now I'm wondering
if you're a smartass or a dumb fuck.

Don't abuse me.

You love me but you can't handle
my cussing? Is your love that sanitized?

Now who's changing the topic?

Why do you treat love like a contest?

Just me?

Everyone treats it that way.

There's no equality in love.

One partner always dominates the other.

Sometimes blatantly,
sometimes by emotional manipulation.

And the best part is, no one learns this.

It just happens. Automatically.

Those romantic songs, films, books...

Inspirational videos on
WhatsApp and Facebook...

Telling us how nice love is,
or how cute life is...

They just want to hide one truth.

What truth?

That all love is selfish. People
love only if there's something to gain.

Without profit, love can't exist.
And if it does, it doesn't last.

Profit?

Yeah, like the joy of small
emotional victories over the other.

So you think I love
you for selfish reasons?

Aren't you human?

What do I have to gain, tell me?

Half the time you're crying,
or else you fight.

Maybe you enjoy suffering like Sunita.

Maybe that's how you profit from love.

The day you stop enjoying
being sad with me, you'd leave me.

Just how a stockbroker
leaves the share market.

This accounting job of yours has made
you see everything as profit and loss!

And you're Mother Teresa's heir, right?

I don't think we'll get a taxi.
Let's take the train.

Cool.

Nah. We take the train every day.

Today we'll take a cab or walk.

Okay.

Listen.

Yeah.

Chuck it.

Say!

Nah. Nothing.

Of course there's something.

Tell me. Don't build it up.

I'll tell you later.

Why not now?

Can't we talk about this later at leisure?

In any case,
you'll be calmer after you eat.

See, that's accounting, got it?

First, you evaluated my state of mind...

And calculated that emotional
investment can be made later.

Better chances of returns!

Thank you my dear, for proving my point.

That's... that's not what I had meant...

The taxi's here.

So, what do I do now?

You are already late in filing it.

Can't you forge a simple balance sheet?

Why the fuck did you all become CA,
you dumb fucks!

Sort out your mess, and don't bother me.
Hang up now!

What's this boring song, bro!
Change the channel or turn it off.

It's not playing for you,
mister - it's for me.

But the customer has a problem with it.

So what do I do?
Am I a doctor, to fix your problems?

The customer is God. Never heard of it?

Then use your Godly powers- stop the
music and make my cab run without petrol!

I like this guy.
Too bad, he'll never go far in life!

Bro, focus on your girlfriend. What I do
with my life is up to me. Got it?

What's your name, buddy?

Joginder. Want to dial
customer care and complain?

No. In fact, you're worthy of praise.

And why would you praise me?

In this world of ass-lickers,
there aren't many like you left.

I'm like you too.
Our honesty won't get us far in life.

It's not like that, brother.
I was almost set for life.

I voted for the BJP.

Actually, I voted for Narendra Modi.
For 'Development'.

I had hoped inflation would decrease.

Petrol prices would drop.

Food would get cheaper.
I'd save and buy my own cab.

I own a piece of land in the village.
Had planned to set up my own flour mill.

Nothing happened.

The promise of development
turned out to be a farce. Nothing more.

Then vote for the Congress party?

What on earth are you saying?

Voting for the Congress means
voting for that Gandhi boy.

He's still in his mother's lap...
how can he manage the country?

Then what about Kejriwal?

Kejriwal is an idiot.
He can barely handle Delhi,

you think he can manage the country?

Then go for the Leftists.

Those with red flags are left
with red asses now. They can't do shit.

Then who will you vote for?

I won't vote for anyone now.
I have lost faith.

Speaking of which, who would you vote for?
Which party do you support?

I don't even believe in marriage.

What does that even mean?

I didn't get you.

Every five years, the country is
married to a government. After five years,

If it works,
great - else there's a divorce

Till then, we are bound to be sodomized.

No matter, who wins the election,
it's the public that always loses.

That's true.

Are you dating him or me?

What happened?

Talk to me.
I don't get politics.

I know that.

You've never even voted, right?

What's the point of voting?
Didn't you hear what he said?

True madam. Voting changes nothing.
We make our own lives.

Got it?

A stranger who sees not
just your thoughts before me,

But also your feelings!

You guys think so alike. Bro,

you sit here at the back. I'll drive.

You just can't control your tongue.

That can't happen, Sir.
I have my wife back in the village.

We have a little daughter too.

That's nice! Do you visit them often?

No Madam.
No point in visiting the village.

When she's free, I send her tickets
and she comes here for 3-4 months.

There is nothing but
heat and dust back there.

How can you say that?
There's so much peace in villages.

It's the cities that
are the hotbed of stress.

Madam, looks like you're city-born.

Yes. How did you know?

Because it's too obvious!

This romantic idea of yours...
That the village is idyllic, peaceful...

He figured you've never
been to a real village.

What's romantic about what I said?

Farmers are dying. There's no water.

Forget serious illnesses,

there's no doctor to treat fever
for miles around in most villages.

And even if you find one, you can't be
sure if he's not a fake. Wanna hear more?

No. Why should I? Are you a journalist?

If only they did their
jobs with integrity.

You can only complain.

Then go! Leave your measly job
and move to a village.

I can.

It's not like villages haven't progressed.

So much has changed.
There's internet, TV, mobile phones.

So the things that cause stress in the
city, you want them in a village as well!

You ought to be worshipped.

You're a saint. You deserve to live there.

Why should I go,

Why should I go, without you by my side?

Because you'd be hot
property in a village,

many boys will fall for you.

In a city, no matter how much
make-up you put, you'll look like trash.

Go to hell.

You think you look like a stud?
Look at a mirror once!

Whatever. I am the hero of my own film.

A flop film.

As if yours is a blockbuster.

Please stop the car. At the corner ahead.

Can't stop it here Ma'am.
Just a bit ahead.

Are you pissed?

Are you?

Yes. So what?

Watch ahead! Driving like a buffoon.

She gets charged up when she's angry.
Like a wild cat.

So the dog in me is
bound to get excited, right?

Take it easy, man!

He won't stop till he cuts it down

It's not a big deal, Sir.

What you did.

You didn't have a problem?

No sir. Not at all.

We did the same thing
in a taxi the last time as well.

The driver got very angry.
Said we had polluted his car.

He was an old grouch.

Lectured us on how today's
vile youth are fucking up the country.

These old farts are just jealous. They
keep shoving their wisdom up our asses.

Cowards, all of them.

Even my father was like that.

And his father too.

But what you did Sir, it's not a big deal.

Let me tell you a secret.

When I stop driving after 11 at night,
I rent the taxi out to gay couples.

They have their fun
and we earn some money.

Is it good money?

What good money?
Have to share it with the cops as well.

The police know about this?

This is Mumbai. Nothing happens
here without police permission.

And these days, even the self-appointed
moral police have joined in.

Motherfuckers.
They'd probably fuck you up.

They would?
They already have fucked us up, Sir.

Let me tell you something.
Come here...

I have a friend who also
drives a cab in Versova.

Right.

Last week, in Versova,
he gave his taxi to two girls.

And the moral policing goons
turned up all armed.

He asked them to take some money
and let them go.

But they were in no mood to listen.

This guy seems to be in a rush.

Put a siren on the car and buzz off!

So the goons beat him up,
pulled the girls out....raped them,

made a video and then
put it on a porn site.

They didn't know that one of
the girls was a rich man's daughter.

She left a note and committed suicide.

The next day, the police
and the cultural goons were caught...

And our special night
service was shut down.

Good only.

I can't believe your story.

If that girl was a rich kid, then
she could've gone to a five star hotel!

Why would she pick up
your special taxi service?

Madam, the thing is...
Let it go. Sir will mind.

No, go on.

Why would I mind,
it's not like we're married.

Ma'am, these rich people
have a poverty fetish.

Just like...
That Salman Khan film- what was it called?

Bajrangi.

Such a shitty film.
Not that one. There was another.

Sultan?

That was even shittier. The recent one...

Yes, 'Kick'! They get a kick out of it.

Rich people get a kick out of
getting down and dirty.

Now what happened?

What do you mean,
'not that we're married'?

Since we're not married... What
would you do if a man tried molesting me?

Haven't thought about it.
We'll see when it happens.

No. tell me now. What would
you do if a man tried molesting me?

What would I do?

Thrash him, what else?

Thank God.

I thought you didn't love me.

How is that related to love?

Not just you, I'd do it for any girl.

So it's not about loving me...

Only because that you think it's wrong?

There is nothing wrong or right.

People can digest certain things or not.

What one can digest one does.
What one can't, one doesn't.

Be it food, drinks, crime or corruption.

Forget this discourse on digestion.
The point is, do you love me or not?

Well, as Shah Rukh said in Mohabbatein...

Don't love someone
expecting to be loved back.

Unrequited love- the same
thing was in Ae Dil Hai Mushkil.

You even cried during the film. Then
why are you contradicting yourself now?

So that means you don't love me.

You believe what you want.

You know I can't stand
this lovey-dovey talk.

If you irritate me more,
I'll leave you here and go. Should I?

We've reached Café Gulshan.

How much?

70 rupees. Do give change.

Wait a sec. Let me park by the side.

Do you have change?

If you ask for your phone, I'll leave now.

My WhatsApp just started working.
Just 2 minutes, please?

Mom had gone to a cousin's wedding.

You won't believe the ruckus
that happened there.

Please give it back?

She's telling me what happened to the
groom's family after the police arrived!

Please, love?

Get the bill.

No, No! Wait, wait!

Sorry. I'll talk to mom later.

Why do you get mad so quick?

First say what you were
waiting to tell me here.

What do I do with this?

It's a present.

For what joy?

It's our first anniversary, dumbo!

So?

So? Isn't it a happy occasion?

It'll be two years the next year.

Will you give me a bike then?

And a car after three years?

I'll gift you a child after marriage.

So that's what you wanted to say.

Why pretend with this gift?

You aren't pretending to love me, right?

Tell me, will you marry me?

No idea. What's the hurry?

Hurry?

I'm 30, love.

Need to have a child in 2 years.

Mom pesters me a lot these days.

Should we get married to pacify
your mom or to legally have a child?

Decide this first.

That's not what I meant.

But don't tell me you've
never thought of marriage .

I have. Absolutely.

In fact, I had decided
before we started dating.

Well?

Like always,
I decided to take it as it comes.

So when will you be sure about me?
I mean, about us?

How am I supposed to know?

Don't say that, love.

I feel very insecure thinking
that you'll leave me for another girl.

That's also possible.

Just like you may leave me
for another man...

One who's ready to
marry you right away.

I will never leave you.

I haven't left you yet either.

Then what's the hurry to get married?

Am I wrong to think this?

Not wrong. Just childish.

Suppose we get married tomorrow.

What's the guarantee that I won't
fall for another woman after marriage?

And then divorce you and settle with her?

Anyway, a woman doesn't
remain the same after childbirth.

The body begins to wear out.

Where will you roam around with a kid?

You won't do that.

Why?

Because no matter what you say,
you're honest at heart.

You aren't deceitful. I know that.

So?

Honest people never deceive others.

How is that relevant?

For example,
like I find you exciting today...

I may find another
woman exciting tomorrow.

I won't cheat on you.

I'll tell you frankly that
I have fallen for someone else.

If that woman likes me back,
then I'll leave you.

Now, how is that cheating?

No. You won't do anything like this.

Marriage changes people.

The ones who change are scared of society.

I don't give a fuck about society
when it comes to my personal life

Sure, I might change a bit, for a year
or two, to try out this routine dull life.

But you'd get bored
of me once that happens

I will never get bored of you.

Because I am like this, right?

I will become like
the rest after marriage.

Then you will miss my pre-marriage avatar.

You will get bored for sure.

No.

All these made-in-heaven
celebrity couples,

even they must be bored of each other.

So couples who stay together till death,
do so pointlessly?

Even a farmer stays with his fields,
all till he dies...

Even if he goes bankrupt,
if he hasn't committed suicide already.

Because he doesn't have an option.

And if he does, then he doesn't
have the balls to act on it.

I agree marriages have issues.
They all do, love.

But after a certain age, it matters
to have someone waiting for you at home.

Of course it matters.

But only for people like you who
can't live without depending on others.

I am a modern independent woman.

Financially, yes.

But not at heart,

and definitely not at mind.

Only because I want to get married?

You talk about taking risks...

Why not take the risk of marrying me?

Come here! Listen.

What is a risk?

A risk is where there is no security.

And marriage literally means security.

So how is marriage a risk?

It's always the same issues,

clashes over money and ego.

The same futile fights
like the ones in films and TV.

Families will interfere.

Raising kids will keep you entertained,

but what about me?

I'll end up philandering, and
even our sex-life will become mechanical.

If you find some fresh sausage,
even you'll salivate.

Whether one is honest or not,

either way tensions are bound to rise.

Then fights. Divorce.

A phone barely lasts two years...

And you dream of lifelong companionship?

Our parents' marriages lasted, right?

Of course.

But that time was different.

And even they probably had their affairs.

Who knows where our fathers' dicks went,
and for whom our mothers' cunts opened up?

Those were different times.
Times of hiding things.

Times of token respect for parents,
family and the nation.

And if our parents were
so righteous and wise...

Then why are we so fucked today?

Because they were hollow.

If our parents were truly cultured
and sensible...

We wouldn't have been like this.

Sweetheart,

you want adventure and security...

Romance and reality - all at once.

You can revel in hypocrisy, not me.

Fine, I won't get anything for you.

I've understood.

You're just killing time with me.

Not serious at all.

What's the point of getting serious?

Tell me.

We live a maximum of 60 years...

First 20 studying and
the last 15 in regrets.

That leaves only 25 years in hand.

8 years go in completing
8 hours of daily sleep.

That leaves 17 years.

2 years go in eating and shitting.

So, in the remaining 15 years,
enjoy as much as you can.

Change as many jobs, partners,
principles, castes, religions

and countries as you can.

Why tie yourself to one thing?

That's easy for you to say.

You're a man.

So?

We're born men or women by accident.

Women can also do all this, can't they?

If you just want a child,
there are many ways to have one.

Read up on the internet.

Why do you need marriage for that?

All this sounds great,

but tomorrow if your wife elopes
with someone else, you'd feel like shit!

Look silly.

I've already told you,
nothing is good or bad.

It's all about how
much someone can stomach.

I can digest all this.
You can't. That's the difference.

If I'm not trying to change your mindset,
then why are you imposing yours on me?

At first I thought you were joking.

But forget marriage,
I doubt you even love me.

I do love you.

Which is why I am here. Now. Today. This
moment. I've been with you for a year.

But I can't speak for tomorrow.

And I won't make the mistake
of marrying - you or anyone else.

What if you do?

So what? You just said I'm not serious.

I may end up marrying
you or someone at a whim.

If I get bored, I might get a divorce.

Life is a comedy,
if you can catch the joke.

I'll leave after eating.
I'm breaking up with you.

Full and final. I'm done with you.

You know I can't stand
chit-chat while eating.

Especially when it's such nice food, after

I am not chatting.
I'm telling you. We're done.

So tell me,

what will you do after the break-up?

Who's chatting now?

It's my rule.

I'll break it when I want.
What do you care?

You're hurt, aren't you?

Now you realize how I feel when you...

I am hurt.

But don't you worry.

Like my backache gets fine after a week,

so will my heartache.

After a point, I can't take all this.

I'll send you an invite.

You'll get married after we break up?

Yes.

With whom?

With whoever. What do you care?

I've spent so much time with you,
don't I deserve to know?

I'll find someone from
a matrimonial website.

Else, all the guys I've been
rejecting for an asshole like you,

I'll marry one of them.

Go ahead.

You'll find some loser.

There are loads in this country.

You are a loser. My husband won't be.

Hundred percent he will be one.

How do you know? Did you conceive him?

I know it.

Because you are a loser.

Neither are you pretty,
nor do you have a hot body.

You don't have money
nor an illustrious family.

You aren't funny or interesting.

You're 30, but you look 35.

That famous line from the movie Krantiveer
describes your life perfectly-

"I don't know what I lived or died for!"

Did you get it?

And what are you?

A king?

You still stay in a rented
place with two other guys.

You have brains but zero success.

No girl has survived you beyond a month,

except me.

Your family doesn't even want to see you.

You'll die like a lonely prick.

Even those who come to your
funeral shall spit on your grave.

Exactly. Perfect analysis.

That's why we're made for each other.

Break up if you want, but you
won't find another like me. You'll see.

You...

you are depressed.

I don't want to be depressed with you.

Depressed...

Me?

Aren't you?

The government is rotten. The media
is a sellout. Your parents are idiots.

Friends are selfish.

The guys you work with
are either corrupt or cowards.

Films are boring and
your girlfriend is a loser.

If you have problems with everything,

why don't you just kill yourself?

What?

Suicide. Do it.

Sweetheart, depressed are
those whose hopes have been fucked.

I have no hope,

and hence, no disappointments.

No fear. That's why I have freedom.

And why should I commit suicide?

I love life.

The world and its people are crooked,
but I love fighting them.

Actually, you are jealous of my freedom.

You want to be like me, but you can't.

Isn't that why you want
to trap me with marriage and children?

So that I also become spineless like you!

So after marriage,

you can fuck my mind
the way I fuck yours now?

Let me eat in peace.

Stop it! Let me watch the movie.

You need your eyes and ears for that.

Leave the rest for me to fuck.

You said the same thing last time.

Shake it. Rub it. Suck it. Ride it.

I know all your tricks.

I won't allow anything.
Let me watch the movie.

What crap!
How can you watch this stupid movie.

What stupid? It's a nice movie.

Such movies educate the public.

On how to respect the country and women.

You especially must watch it.

If 5000 years of culture
couldn't educate the public,

what difference will
this 2 hour movie make?

I'm not that educated,

but I know people must be reminded
constantly about what's good and bad.

Else wouldn't it be easier
for powerful assholes to mislead them?

Wow.

You are getting smarter.

Are you praising me or...

Only the innocent get misled.

And people today are far from innocent.

They were at one time, but not anymore.

You think people don't
know what's good or bad?

Everyone knows everything.

They don't need education for that.
They just know.

Yet they vote for scum,
this innocent public of yours.

They take dowry.

Abort girl children.

Either they commit corruption
or comply silently.

So long as their own house is not on fire,
they let others' burn.

Arguing over which party to side with,

this stupid public has
forgotten to take its own side.

I often wonder what the
soldiers on the border think.

We sleep peacefully because of them.

Can they sleep peacefully
knowing what's happening

in the country they're protecting?

You used to write poems in college, right?

Did plays as well?

There's still time, you should quit
accounting and write dialogues for movies.

Dialogues for movies?

Yes! Your mind will find an outlet.

Our cinema is as spineless as our people.

Have you ever heard the name
of any political party in a movie?

The characters inhabit a space where
nothing is real-whether it's politics,

sex or society.

It's all superficial.

Home-made sex videos
are more authentic than this.

These cowards have got the
audience addicted to this delusion.

It's like opium, both the
peddlers and buyers are in a stupor.

Why don't you write for art films instead?

Look at me.

Have you ever seen an art film?

Yes, I have.

They are all art.

But no heart.

Social sensitivity...

Tailor-made for white-collar people.

Well-ironed.

These popcorn flicks we watch
waste enough of my hard-earned money.

Even if I write something,
the Censors won't pass it.

And if it does pass,

it'll offend so many
people that it would flop.

Yes. I read about the movie 'Padmaavat'.

Mom says intolerance has
increased under the BJP government.

It's probably best you don't write movies.

You'll write about Modi or the BJP.

Or the RSS.

You're better being an accountant.

The current climate is dangerous
for freedom of expression.

The current climate?

Things have never been ideal
nor will they be in a 100 years.

The Congress blames the BJP and
RSS for curbing Freedom of Expression.

Will the Congress tolerate movies

or serials criticizing
the Nehru-Gandhi family?

Do they have guts?

Everyone wants to censor.

Politicians,
news media, industrialists, the judiciary.

Whoever comes to power will do this.

Enough.

Let me enjoy the movie.

You enjoy the movie,

let me enjoy you. What's the problem!

Look, the song has started.
Suck me off till then please.

I'll tell you when the song is over.

You can watch it on YouTube later.

I can see the whole movie on the internet.

I want to watch it here!

Will you suck or should I leave?

Then you can watch it in peace.

Your cunt creamed in the cab.

What about me?

My dick is still waiting.

Should I wait till eternity now? You won't
let me watch the movie in peace, right?

I will. Why wouldn't I?

But pacify my cock first.

Yeah, start now.

How long will we go on like this?

Like what?

The way things are.

Now don't bore me with
the same things again.

Then what do I talk to you about?

Either you fight

or have sex

or give depressing sermons.

Would it hurt to talk lovingly for once...

This is how I love, silly.

You won't get it.

I get it.

You're a coward.

You run away before you
can get hurt by anything.

Look at me.

Despite all my hardships,

I still have the courage to face more.

You are envious of my courage, right?

Both envious and attracted.

You won't be able to handle
a girl like yourself, right?

You are right.

We should break up.

What's this all of a sudden?

It's not sudden. It's how it is.

What's simmering in our
subconscious suddenly hits us.

Didn't you also want
to break up back at the hotel?

I've spoken of it many times.
But so have you.

I know.

But it never hit me.

I don't know about you,
but it didn't hit me.

When you were talking at the hotel,
I heard you but didn't absorb your words.

Now I have.

Let's break up.

This will probably
be the first amicable one.

Let it go, love.

I never meant it.

I know you're very stressed these days.

That's my default mode.

I get high on stress.

Even if I land in heaven, I will fuck
things up to create stress for everyone.

But that's not the point. My point is that

our relationship has
reached its expiry date.

One should throw away an expired
product before it fucks you up.

What product?

Come. Get up.
Drop me till the hostel.

Let's drop the subject.

I don't want to justify breaking up.

It must be done.

That's it!

Anyway...

There's this girl at the bank.

What did you say?

The bank near my house.

There is a girl there.

Cashier.

She's average-looking.

Doesn't talk much.

Quite innocent.

But her eyes ooze with lust,

even if she tries to hide it.

Plus, she has round and tight breasts.

She's slim.

When her boobs swing
wildly as she rides my cock,

it'll be heaven, I swear.

She's skinny, so she can bounce
on my cock for at least half an hour.

Perfect girl to date for six months.

She seems conservative.

But once I get her in bed,

I'd fuck her brains out.

She'll keep coming back for
more even after she gets married.

Have you gone nuts?

What shit you are saying?

Basically, I want to invest
my time on the bank girl.

So I'll be unable to give you much time.
No option.

We have to break up.

No option.

Don't stretch the joke.

Where did this girl come from suddenly?

At least, find a good excuse to break up.

Not suddenly.

She's been giving me
signals for a month now.

And I've been reciprocating too.

If you don't believe me,

I'll call you when I
fuck her for the first time.

If she allows, you can shoot us.

And if you want,
join in after setting up the camera.

You're bullshitting.

I know it.

Actually,

come with me to the bank tomorrow.

I am your third boyfriend
since school, right?

And one of them was a foolish married
teacher who got fired thanks to you.

You're low on looks
but high on experience.

When you see her talking to me, you'll see

where it's heading.

So what if I had three boyfriends!

Would you know if I hadn't told you?

Do you think I'm a slut?

Is that why you're leaving me?

You think like a typical man or woman.

Even I've had girlfriends,

Does that make me a man-slut?

See, the thing is...

Either a man leaves a woman

or she leaves him.

Lucky are the lovers who part mutually.

Anyway, we are both
are unlucky in general.

Why leave this lucky
chance to break up mutually?

Agreed?

What wrong have I done?

No matter what you
do and how you treat me...

I love you.

Look...

Look...

I won't fight with you today onwards.

I won't cry either.

Marriage can wait too.

And if you don't want it, then we won't.

And if you want to leave
me after marriage, you can.

But don't leave me now
for another girl, please.

I beg you.

It's only you,

who really talks to me.

You curse me,

but

at least I know you care.

Listen, do one thing.

You..

You... you'll leave that girl
once you're done with her, right?

I'm okay with that.

I'll accept her as your
mistress for six months.

Even if you can't
meet me while dating her,

I'll bear with it.

Just speak to me on the phone
for an hour every day, please.

I am tired of living like this.

If you leave me like this,

I'll do something.

You'll commit suicide?

If you leave me, I will.

What will that achieve?

You want me to die?

First answer me,
what will suicide achieve?

I don't want to live without you.

I know that.

But tell me, what will suicide achieve?

You will feel bad.

So?

So you won't live happily.

As if I am jumping with joy now!

One more sorrow will add up.
What difference would it make?

How would I know?

I'd be dead.

What would you do after death?

Do you believe in the afterlife?

There must be something.

Heaven or hell.

You're sure it exists?

You're sure it doesn't?

If it does,

you'd still be a tortured
soul like you are now.

Yes. What are you trying to say?

Nothing.

Just fucking with you.

It's fun seeing you all worked up.

You're an asshole.

Tell me something new.

Please don't break up with me.

Fine, I won't.

And that girl?

Which girl?

Bastard, you were lying to me?

We all need some drama in life.

This is how you create it.

Our life is not like a movie

or like a bank scam,
always rife with drama.

What difference does it make?

And even if it does, who cares?

I don't know what you're saying.

Neither do I.

And even if I did, so what?

I'll go back to the hostel now.

Sunita will be back.

Have to listen to her sob story as well.

And we have to cook chicken
for the hostel folks as well.

Let Sunita go to hell. You stay here.

No way.

I've had enough of your bile for a day.

What's your scene tomorrow?

Office.

On a Sunday?

Yes. We have two months
of backlog to clear.

Didn't you all clear that last week?

Yes. We did.
But my boss said that...

Actually I'm not sure.

He has called me, Amit, Sudhir and Nisha.

And Sudhir's mom is having
that kidney dial... what is it called?

Dialysis.
Yes. That.

He's still called Sudhir to work.

So when will you get free tomorrow?

Don't know.

Then let's go.

Where?

To fuck.

Please tell me.

Told you, to fuck.

What?

I'll have to look at porn
and jack off tomorrow anyway.

Since you are here right now, come.

We just did it in the theatre.

That was furtive and anxious.
Don't fuck my brains now.

Just come.

You can't think of anything besides pussy,
cock and ass. Can you?

We only meet properly on
Saturdays and Sundays, correct?

If you're on your period,
then it's a no-go.

And on holidays, you meet your mother.

Now I get this time-table, but
my cock doesn't. When will you get that?

The other stuff I think about,
you don't get it anyway.

So why waste time talking
about anything else?

Even when you're talking
about politics and society

it's all about cock,
ass and fucking.

What's the difference?

First time you've cracked a good joke!

I'm not as dumb as you think.

Then come!
Show off your smartness at the lodge.

Fine. I give up.

Are you doing me a favor?
Or am I begging you?

If you have the energy to fuck then come,

else I can always hire cheap whores
nearby to lick my ass like in porn videos.

Don't call me a whore, motherfucker!

I crave this angry
cat-like energy of yours!

I hate fucking dead fish, anyway

First apologize for calling me a whore.

Sorry. Come on.

I am sorry. Forgive me.

Fine, I am your whore, you're my customer
and God's the pimp who made us meet.

Happy now?

I have to go with friends
at night to smoke weed.

Why don't you stop smoking weed.

Only makes your volatile
mood swings worse.

I can leave you at the hostel,
sweetheart... but not weed.

Fuck.

What's wrong?

I shouldn't have brought
up the topic of weed.

Why? What happened?

Nothing's happened...

but it will.

Please don't do it, love.

Please don't!

I'm not comfortable.

Listen!

Listen!

What?

You're not comfortable?

Drink this.

No.

No....

Have it... You'll get comfortable.

Don't do it. See...

Ah,

now I can see.

Your boobs are sagging

Why don't you get breast firming serum?

Or massage oil after
bath and before sleeping.

Look at me,
talking like an idiot instead of fucking.

Look...

Today I want to fuck your
ass...I'll do the rest later.

Will you take off
your panties or should I?

I'll do whatever you want.

But please switch off the mobile.

I'll delete it later.

Pull the undies down.

Mine first.

Do I need to tell you everything?

You haven't shaved your pussy?

It hurts. Please do it slowly.

Have you lost it! I am leaving.

Don't leave. Don't leave me.

I... I was trying to imitate porn.

I won't bite anymore.

Did it hurt a lot?

What are you doing, love?

Have you gone nuts?

You never hit me.

So, I thought I'll hit myself.

I've told you so many times,
not to smoke weed.

Why then?

I won't smoke after this. Promise.

Promise?

I swear on my dick.

Bastard.

What are you looking for?

Please tell.

Ah!

Got it.

What's this for?

Your pussy must be in pain,

so I'll apply this.

You'll feel better.

Okay? Come. Lie down.

You'd planned to bite me from before?

No, why?

Then why did you carry
Vaseline in your bag?

Oh... this?

Because today I had intended
to fuck you from behind!

Your pussy's always loose.

Dry too.

And

spit dries up quickly in your pussy

It'd be no good in the ass.

That's why I got Vaseline.

No. You've bitten me way too hard.

I won't allow you from behind today.

Today?

When did you let me
fuck from behind before?

I mean .... I mean, not today.

Some other day.

Today you have to let me.

Get fucked every moment,
this very moment....

Don't joke.

At least let me fuck your ass.

What's wrong?

Okay.

Let's do our regular thing. Fine?

Turn off the cellphone first.

Let it record at least.

Then you can delete it yourself.

How can I trust you?
What if you go back on your word later?

It's been recording till now.

A bit more won't matter.

Satisfied?

Can I continue now?

I thought that...
you don't mind me deleting it?

No.

I had anyway thought I would...

let it go.

No. Tell me what you were thinking.

Take it deeper, my queen.

It needs to be longer to go deeper,
my king. Right?

Continue. Continue.

If you're tired of my dick,
lick my balls as well.

And when you're tired of that,
lick my asshole too.

Don't stop.

You ask me to shave.

Ever seen your own hair in the mirror?

Open your mouth for
just one thing, darling.

Keep licking.

I'll puke, I am warning you.

We just took a shower half an hour back.

Don't worry.
My asshole's clean as a whistle.

Please...

Now go on sucking. Should I beg you?

Time's passing by.

Breathe deeper.

Put in your tongue. There.

Twirl your tongue.

Twirl it.

Bite if you want to.

Come up here... come.
Fuck me harder, love!

Let your cock tear my pussy apart.

Fuck me, love.

Don't stop!

Harder, harder...

Rape that hole

Rape me!

It hurts, love...

Make me wet, make me bleed!

It hurts so much...

But I love the pain!

I'm going crazy...

Don't stop. Don't Stop. Don't Stop.

Please... please don't, it hurts a lot.

Didn't you promise not to hurt me?

The last time you had an abortion,
it can't hurt more than that right?

You can take this much pain.

Please don't do it, darling.

I was giving you pleasure till now,
wasn't I?

Pleasure?

From you?

Every time I fuck you I imagine
someone else's face, got it!

These days I can't even do that.

Your rotten face is stuck in my head.

Bitch, giving me pleasure?

Can't bear to see your face while fucking,
that's why I wanted to fuck your ass.

Hide the face and fuck the
base- that's all you're good for.

Do you know that?

No one will even touch you,
if they're not high.

You want me to rape you?

You'd puke if you lick my asshole?

Even kissing you can make one puke, bitch.

Quit these tantrums and give me your ass.
It'll be fine. Come on.

How do you know it'll be fine?

Motherfucker, how do you know?

Did you put someone else's cock in your
ass, when you couldn't get a girl to fuck?

You tiny-dicked eunuch!
You're just a piece of shit!

Now tell me.

Am I shit?

Speak up.

Speak now.

You wanted to be raped, right? Take this.

Who knows how many have
torn your cunt till date!

You're trying to teach me?
Bitch!

I'm not a bad guy.

Say something, please.

Please!

Laugh.

What?

Laugh.

Laugh loudly.

Can you?

Loudly.

Louder.

Keep laughing.

I'll send it to you.

Will you marry me?

I thought about it a lot.

I'll never find someone
who loves me this much.

Let's get married.

Then whatever happens, we'll see.

I've seen it already.

This won't happen again.

I promise you.

I can't do this again either.

I've promised myself.

Look.

This is real life. Not a movie.

Don't throw dialogues at me.

Well, here's one more.

Movies or life -

both end eventually.

So has this.

Please!

Don't leave me like this.

I'll die without you.

What difference does it make?

So are you about me!

A lot.

Even if it does, who cares, silly!

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

My kind of love, you have never known.

Our hearts are taking a path less walked!

Tell me, oh love, where should I go?

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

My kind of love, you have never known.

Our hearts are taking a path less walked!

Tell me, oh love, where should I go?

Heart, heart, heart,
this crazy heart of mine.

Don't misunderstand
this craziness of mine.

What kind of chaos is this?

Heart, heart, heart,
this crazy heart of mine.

Don't misunderstand
this craziness of mine.

What kind of chaos is this?

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

My kind of love, you have never known.

Our hearts are taking a path less walked!

Tell me, oh love, where should I go?

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

My kind of love, you have never known.

Our hearts are taking a path less walked!

Tell me, oh love, where should I go?

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

My kind of love, you have never known.

Our hearts are taking a path less walked!

Tell me, oh love, where should I go?

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

My kind of love, you have never known.

Our hearts are taking a path less walked!

Tell me, oh love, where should I go?

My love is stubborn, yet naive.

You just don't get it.

Let the world be jealous,
people be jealous.

Dear, why do you despair?

My love is stubborn, yet naive.

You just don't get it.

Let the world be jealous,
people be jealous.

Dear, why do you despair?

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

My kind of love, you have never known.

Our hearts are taking a path less walked!

Tell me, oh love, where should I go?

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

My kind of love, you have never known.

Our hearts are taking a path less walked!

Tell me, oh love, where should I go?

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

I am crazy about you.

So are you about me!

Tell me, oh love, where should I go?

Stop the film.

Listen, stop!