All language subtitles for My Best Friend Is A Vampire - Comedy Horror 1987 Eng Subs [H264-mp4].eng

af Afrikaans Download
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt-PT Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian Download
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:52,412 --> 00:01:55,677 If I had to pick a beginning to this bizarre story, 2 00:01:55,748 --> 00:01:57,682 I guess it would have to be the dream. 3 00:01:57,750 --> 00:01:59,615 Yeah, definitely the dream. 4 00:01:59,686 --> 00:02:01,313 That's when it all started. 5 00:02:01,387 --> 00:02:04,879 That's me, Jeremy Capello, sitting inside the tuba. 6 00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:08,086 If I appear disoriented, it's because I don't know how to play a tuba 7 00:02:08,161 --> 00:02:10,356 or any other musical instrument. 8 00:02:10,430 --> 00:02:13,456 I'm not in the band. That's Candy Andrews. 9 00:02:13,533 --> 00:02:17,299 She's a cheerleader. I think she likes me. 10 00:02:17,370 --> 00:02:19,930 But for some unknown reason, I can't keep my eyes 11 00:02:20,006 --> 00:02:22,804 off Darla Blake, musical prodigy. 12 00:02:22,876 --> 00:02:24,639 Juilliard candidate perhaps, 13 00:02:24,711 --> 00:02:27,544 but not what you would call centerfold material. 14 00:02:27,614 --> 00:02:33,450 In fact, Darla Blake is not someone you would call, period. 15 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:35,715 Then comes the note. 16 00:02:35,788 --> 00:02:39,053 I can't believe it, but I'm fascinated. 17 00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,588 "Follow me." 18 00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:49,961 It seemed like a good idea at the time. 19 00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:53,465 So I went for it. 20 00:02:56,709 --> 00:02:59,769 Suddenly, I'm in the girls' locker room, 21 00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:02,940 no man's land, the forbidden zone. 22 00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:04,711 I'd heard the horror stories. 23 00:03:04,784 --> 00:03:06,547 Men caught in here were castrated 24 00:03:06,619 --> 00:03:09,452 and made to pass out towels for eternity. 25 00:03:09,522 --> 00:03:11,922 A living hell I could do without. 26 00:03:13,993 --> 00:03:16,086 And then I see her. 27 00:03:16,162 --> 00:03:18,027 She's gorgeous. 28 00:03:18,097 --> 00:03:20,622 Is this the same Darla Blake? 29 00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:24,864 Without being too obvious, I check out her birthday suit. 30 00:03:24,938 --> 00:03:27,099 She asks me to take a shower with her. 31 00:03:27,173 --> 00:03:30,438 I tell her I'm clean, but she insists. 32 00:03:30,510 --> 00:03:32,375 "Make love to me," she says. 33 00:03:32,445 --> 00:03:34,777 I tell her, "We're moving too fast." 34 00:03:34,847 --> 00:03:36,838 I offer to take her to lunch instead. 35 00:03:36,916 --> 00:03:39,316 L... l... 36 00:03:39,385 --> 00:03:41,910 Suddenly, there's a new babe in my arms. 37 00:03:41,988 --> 00:03:44,752 I'm shocked. I excuse myself and ask, "Where's Darla?" 38 00:03:44,824 --> 00:03:46,485 She tells me to kiss her. 39 00:03:46,559 --> 00:03:49,426 I say, "Whose dream is this anyway? I'm looking for Darla." 40 00:03:49,495 --> 00:03:50,792 She tells me to kiss her again. 41 00:03:50,863 --> 00:03:53,593 I refuse. Then things get ugly. 42 00:04:07,313 --> 00:04:08,974 Throw him down! 43 00:04:27,166 --> 00:04:29,157 All units, 7 A85. 44 00:04:29,235 --> 00:04:32,500 Code 6 on Kirby and Westheimer. 45 00:04:32,572 --> 00:04:34,972 7X23. Roger on your Code 6. 46 00:04:35,041 --> 00:04:37,032 Louis, call your son. 47 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:39,704 - His eggs are ready. - Jeremy. 48 00:04:43,182 --> 00:04:44,444 Morning. 49 00:04:44,517 --> 00:04:45,950 Morning. 50 00:04:46,019 --> 00:04:49,511 Morning. Morning, Dad. 51 00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:53,258 Mom, I've got a problem. 52 00:04:53,326 --> 00:04:55,021 What's your problem, Jeremy? 53 00:04:55,094 --> 00:04:58,063 Honest to God, I cannot remember what Dad looks like. 54 00:04:59,265 --> 00:05:02,234 Well, he's still a very handsome man. 55 00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:05,430 Dad, you're bald. 56 00:05:10,576 --> 00:05:12,601 Morning, Mrs. Capello, Mr. Capello. 57 00:05:12,679 --> 00:05:14,647 - Morning, Ralph. - Sorry I can't stay for breakfast, but... 58 00:05:14,714 --> 00:05:16,409 - We're running late, as usual. - As usual. 59 00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:18,074 Ralph's right. We have to go. 60 00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:20,483 Ralph, there's a speed trap over at the Montrose off-ramp. 61 00:05:20,553 --> 00:05:21,713 Thanks, Mrs. Capello. 62 00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:25,082 Drive carefully, boys. 63 00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:27,319 We always do. 64 00:05:31,564 --> 00:05:33,964 The same dream, fourth night in a row. 65 00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:35,500 Darla Blake. 66 00:05:35,568 --> 00:05:37,763 How can you totally ignore Candy Andrews, 67 00:05:37,837 --> 00:05:40,772 who, by the way, is hot after your tailpipe, 68 00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:43,968 then have perverted dreams about frigid and rigid Blake? 69 00:05:44,043 --> 00:05:46,068 - It's not perverted. - You're right. 70 00:05:46,145 --> 00:05:47,737 It's not perverted, it's bizarre. 71 00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:50,078 Okay, but what does it mean? 72 00:05:50,149 --> 00:05:53,277 If you're crazy enough to waste a perfectly good wet dream on Darla Blake, 73 00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:54,684 you need professional help. 74 00:05:54,754 --> 00:05:55,880 You don't understand. 75 00:05:55,955 --> 00:06:00,085 I see a side to this girl that nobody knows exists. 76 00:06:00,159 --> 00:06:03,219 I have a theory about this dream of yours. 77 00:06:03,296 --> 00:06:05,196 Okay, when was the last time you got laid? 78 00:06:05,264 --> 00:06:06,891 What does that have to do with anything? 79 00:06:06,966 --> 00:06:08,194 Can't you remember? 80 00:06:08,267 --> 00:06:11,566 Not that it's any of your damn business, but Peterson's party. 81 00:06:11,637 --> 00:06:13,036 Jenny Cicero in the closet, remember? 82 00:06:13,106 --> 00:06:14,300 Oh, no! Yeah, I remember. 83 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:17,605 You bought her a dozen roses and invited her home to meet your parents. 84 00:06:17,677 --> 00:06:19,440 - What is that? - She's a nice girl. 85 00:06:19,512 --> 00:06:22,481 No, you're confusing true love with common household guilt. 86 00:06:22,548 --> 00:06:25,039 What you need is an incredible sexual encounter 87 00:06:25,118 --> 00:06:28,246 with no strings attached, no emotional involvements, 88 00:06:28,321 --> 00:06:31,119 just pure, unadulterated lust. 89 00:06:31,190 --> 00:06:33,215 - That's not me. - It could be. 90 00:06:33,292 --> 00:06:35,590 I mean, a carefree, fun-Ioving romp in the sack 91 00:06:35,661 --> 00:06:37,094 with but a single purpose... 92 00:06:37,163 --> 00:06:39,393 to use and degrade another human being 93 00:06:39,465 --> 00:06:41,399 to satisfy your own selfish pleasures. 94 00:06:41,467 --> 00:06:43,059 Sorry. Not interested. 95 00:06:43,136 --> 00:06:45,400 Sex without guilt is the greatest. 96 00:06:45,471 --> 00:06:47,564 Hi, Pam. 97 00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:49,574 But pick a girl who doesn't go to this school. 98 00:07:44,730 --> 00:07:46,288 - Hi, Flo. - Hi, Jeremy. 99 00:07:46,365 --> 00:07:48,026 - He's in the back. - Thanks. 100 00:07:52,572 --> 00:07:54,597 Hiya, George. How many today? 101 00:07:54,674 --> 00:07:57,472 Oh, the usual. A dozen or so. 102 00:07:57,543 --> 00:08:00,410 George, what would all these old ladies do without me? 103 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,175 Probably die of constipation. 104 00:08:03,583 --> 00:08:05,016 Yeah. 105 00:08:06,719 --> 00:08:08,710 You know, just once, I wish I could make a delivery 106 00:08:08,788 --> 00:08:10,688 to someone who still had all their teeth. 107 00:08:10,756 --> 00:08:12,485 Got a new one for you today. 108 00:08:12,558 --> 00:08:14,048 Oh, yeah? 109 00:08:14,126 --> 00:08:15,787 Highline Drive? 110 00:08:15,862 --> 00:08:17,523 You're sure about this address, George? 111 00:08:17,597 --> 00:08:19,224 That's the address she gave. 112 00:08:19,298 --> 00:08:21,095 This is the old Gardner mansion. 113 00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:23,897 It's been deserted for years. It's a dump. 114 00:08:23,970 --> 00:08:25,699 Wait a minute. Wait a minute. 115 00:08:25,771 --> 00:08:28,001 No PoliGrip. No Geritol. 116 00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:29,439 No Deep Heating Rub? 117 00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:32,876 George, we may be on to something here. 118 00:08:50,596 --> 00:08:52,587 This has got to be a joke. 119 00:08:57,603 --> 00:08:59,070 Come in. 120 00:09:08,781 --> 00:09:10,442 Hello! 121 00:09:14,020 --> 00:09:15,681 Groceries! 122 00:09:16,689 --> 00:09:18,350 Hello! 123 00:09:26,098 --> 00:09:27,429 Hello? 124 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:29,195 Hey! 125 00:09:29,268 --> 00:09:31,031 Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty. Hi. 126 00:09:32,805 --> 00:09:34,966 Where is everybody, huh? 127 00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:37,737 This comes to 13.49. 128 00:09:37,810 --> 00:09:40,278 I can take a check, but I'm afraid I'm gonna have to see some ID. 129 00:09:45,985 --> 00:09:46,974 Are you hurt? 130 00:09:49,722 --> 00:09:53,988 I'm afraid Nora's a bit nervous around strangers. 131 00:09:54,060 --> 00:09:56,460 Is anything the matter? 132 00:09:57,530 --> 00:09:59,464 No... 133 00:09:59,532 --> 00:10:01,932 I just thought you were somebody else. 134 00:10:02,001 --> 00:10:03,969 Have we met before? 135 00:10:04,036 --> 00:10:05,628 I'm not sure. 136 00:10:05,705 --> 00:10:09,607 You're bleeding. I feel responsible. 137 00:10:09,675 --> 00:10:10,972 Let me see. 138 00:10:11,043 --> 00:10:13,102 It's really just... just a scratch. 139 00:10:14,213 --> 00:10:16,477 When I was little and scratched my finger, 140 00:10:16,549 --> 00:10:18,949 my mother would always kiss it. 141 00:10:23,789 --> 00:10:26,223 My mother used Band-Aids. 142 00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:28,852 I've got one in the car. 143 00:10:28,928 --> 00:10:30,953 How's that? Better? 144 00:10:31,030 --> 00:10:33,123 Much better. 145 00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:37,636 I have to go. 146 00:10:37,703 --> 00:10:39,295 - Jeremy? - Yes? 147 00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:42,034 - Do you find me attractive? - Very. 148 00:10:42,108 --> 00:10:44,303 I have to go. More deliveries, you know? 149 00:10:44,377 --> 00:10:45,901 I like you, Jeremy. 150 00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:47,605 Can you come back later? 151 00:10:47,680 --> 00:10:50,376 You want me to come back? 152 00:10:50,449 --> 00:10:51,643 How about tonight? 153 00:10:51,717 --> 00:10:55,346 I really, really have to go. 154 00:10:55,421 --> 00:10:57,321 Around midnight? 155 00:10:57,390 --> 00:10:58,550 I'm a night owl. 156 00:10:58,624 --> 00:11:01,218 Night owl. 157 00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:08,129 She sucked your what? 158 00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:10,327 My finger, you jerk! 159 00:11:12,805 --> 00:11:14,363 My finger! 160 00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:16,931 He lets her get away. 161 00:11:17,009 --> 00:11:19,102 Ralph, there's something very weird about this woman. 162 00:11:19,178 --> 00:11:21,043 She's the woman in my dreams. 163 00:11:21,113 --> 00:11:22,876 Great. Then she's perfect. 164 00:11:22,948 --> 00:11:25,041 No! Ralph, she's not the woman of my dreams, 165 00:11:25,117 --> 00:11:27,415 the woman in my dreams! 166 00:11:27,486 --> 00:11:29,784 - She knew my name. - So what? 167 00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:32,289 I didn't tell her my name. 168 00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:34,724 Look, this is like an omen from God, okay? 169 00:11:34,794 --> 00:11:36,887 Look at it this way. You like this woman, right? 170 00:11:36,962 --> 00:11:39,863 There's an attraction. A sexual attraction. 171 00:11:39,932 --> 00:11:42,526 - Yeah. I guess so. - Perfect. 172 00:11:42,601 --> 00:11:44,228 Is this someone you could see being married to? 173 00:11:44,303 --> 00:11:45,793 - No. - Perfect. 174 00:11:45,871 --> 00:11:47,202 What is the problem? 175 00:11:47,273 --> 00:11:49,605 - Let's go for it, man. - No. 176 00:11:49,675 --> 00:11:51,734 I promise, nothing will go wrong. 177 00:11:51,811 --> 00:11:54,678 - I'll drive. - It's a school night. 178 00:11:54,747 --> 00:11:56,908 Do it, nerd! 179 00:11:59,752 --> 00:12:01,379 I don't even know her name. 180 00:12:01,454 --> 00:12:03,388 Perfect. 181 00:12:08,994 --> 00:12:10,962 Well, she's still up, stud. 182 00:12:11,030 --> 00:12:13,999 You're absolutely certain this will make me a better person? 183 00:12:14,066 --> 00:12:15,693 If nothing else, you'll sleep better. 184 00:12:15,768 --> 00:12:17,599 No more nightmares about Darla Blake. 185 00:12:17,670 --> 00:12:18,694 What if I was wrong? 186 00:12:18,771 --> 00:12:21,672 What if I misinterpreted the entire situation? 187 00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:24,710 Jeremy, a beautiful woman sucked your finger and begged for more. 188 00:12:24,777 --> 00:12:26,176 This is a date with destiny. 189 00:12:26,245 --> 00:12:28,611 Now get in there and enjoy it. 190 00:12:28,681 --> 00:12:30,615 All right. All right. 191 00:12:32,017 --> 00:12:33,882 How do I look? 192 00:12:33,953 --> 00:12:35,477 Like a vacuum cleaner salesman. 193 00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:37,911 No, I'm kidding. 194 00:12:37,990 --> 00:12:39,753 Relax. You look great. 195 00:12:39,825 --> 00:12:40,951 All right. 196 00:12:41,694 --> 00:12:43,389 Here goes nothing. 197 00:12:43,462 --> 00:12:45,453 Professor, shouldn't we warn him? 198 00:12:45,531 --> 00:12:48,022 No. Maybe he's one of them. 199 00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:50,091 But what if he isn't? 200 00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:58,376 Professor, what if he isn't one of them? 201 00:12:58,444 --> 00:13:00,844 Either way, it's too late now. 202 00:13:00,913 --> 00:13:02,744 Hello? 203 00:13:06,018 --> 00:13:07,679 Hello? 204 00:13:11,056 --> 00:13:12,216 It's me. 205 00:13:13,225 --> 00:13:14,852 Hello? 206 00:13:20,699 --> 00:13:21,859 Don't even think about it. 207 00:13:24,937 --> 00:13:26,302 Up there? 208 00:13:27,139 --> 00:13:28,163 Yeah? 209 00:13:29,608 --> 00:13:31,599 Why am I talking to a cat? 210 00:13:42,121 --> 00:13:43,179 Hello. 211 00:13:50,129 --> 00:13:52,063 Hello, Jeremy. 212 00:13:55,034 --> 00:13:57,434 I... The door was open. 213 00:13:57,503 --> 00:13:59,869 I called out, but... 214 00:13:59,939 --> 00:14:01,964 I've been expecting you. 215 00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:04,339 Oh, boy. 216 00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:07,607 Go ahead and look at me, Jeremy. Don't be afraid. 217 00:14:11,617 --> 00:14:14,848 People said dreams don't come true. 218 00:14:14,920 --> 00:14:17,411 I'm glad you came. 219 00:14:17,489 --> 00:14:19,582 I want you to know 220 00:14:19,658 --> 00:14:22,923 that I'm usually not this forward with women. 221 00:14:37,243 --> 00:14:40,212 Jeremy. Shit. 222 00:14:40,279 --> 00:14:41,871 What do I do? 223 00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:56,394 Jeremy. 224 00:14:57,596 --> 00:14:59,029 Jeremy! 225 00:15:01,133 --> 00:15:02,657 Hurry. 226 00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:07,434 You are the most intense, gorgeous woman I ever met. 227 00:15:07,506 --> 00:15:09,838 I don't even know your name. 228 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:12,241 Call me Nora. 229 00:15:12,311 --> 00:15:14,711 Nora? 230 00:15:14,780 --> 00:15:17,044 I thought that was your cat's name. 231 00:15:17,116 --> 00:15:18,777 Whatever. 232 00:15:32,164 --> 00:15:33,791 Did you hear something? 233 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:44,467 You're not expecting anyone, are you? 234 00:15:55,487 --> 00:15:57,352 Stop this obscenity! 235 00:15:57,423 --> 00:15:59,948 - Oh, God! - Get him. 236 00:16:00,025 --> 00:16:01,617 Oh, you... 237 00:16:01,694 --> 00:16:03,491 Hey, you! 238 00:16:03,562 --> 00:16:05,154 Hey! Stop! 239 00:16:10,369 --> 00:16:12,064 Hey! Hey! 240 00:16:12,137 --> 00:16:14,128 Quick! I knew it! 241 00:16:14,206 --> 00:16:15,673 Drive! 242 00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:19,573 - Where are your clothes? - Screw my clothes! 243 00:16:19,645 --> 00:16:21,169 Let's get the hell out of here! 244 00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:32,816 Milton High School, huh? 245 00:16:32,891 --> 00:16:35,451 Well, we'll see. 246 00:16:35,527 --> 00:16:37,119 Professor! 247 00:16:38,263 --> 00:16:39,355 Professor! 248 00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:48,331 I knew it. I knew it. 249 00:16:48,407 --> 00:16:51,399 I'm having the most intense sexual experience of my life, 250 00:16:51,477 --> 00:16:53,206 and some wild man kicks the door down. 251 00:16:53,278 --> 00:16:55,473 - Who was it? - Her husband, boyfriend... 252 00:16:55,547 --> 00:16:56,775 How the hell am I supposed to know? 253 00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:58,373 - You didn't see anybody? - No, man. 254 00:16:58,450 --> 00:17:00,782 I saw this white van, but what could I do? 255 00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,684 Look. Come on. This isn't funny. 256 00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:04,382 I could've been killed. 257 00:17:04,456 --> 00:17:06,287 You know, maybe you should stick to your dreams, man. 258 00:17:06,358 --> 00:17:08,519 You're just not ready for real life yet. 259 00:17:09,762 --> 00:17:11,787 All right, all right. 260 00:17:16,568 --> 00:17:19,162 Look, I'm sorry things didn't work out, okay? 261 00:17:19,238 --> 00:17:21,604 We don't have to tell anybody about this. 262 00:17:21,673 --> 00:17:24,005 - No, of course not. - Come on, l... 263 00:17:24,076 --> 00:17:26,067 This wasn't one of my prouder moments, okay? 264 00:17:26,145 --> 00:17:28,841 - Hey, you're bleeding. - What? Oh, my... 265 00:17:28,914 --> 00:17:30,381 Wow. It looks like bite marks. 266 00:17:30,449 --> 00:17:32,076 Hey, I am impressed. 267 00:17:32,151 --> 00:17:35,086 I told you, she was intense. 268 00:17:35,154 --> 00:17:36,849 - Damn. - That's right. 269 00:17:36,922 --> 00:17:39,356 - Later, man. - See you later. 270 00:17:39,425 --> 00:17:40,949 Watch your sheet. 271 00:17:59,511 --> 00:18:02,776 What now, Professor? 272 00:18:02,848 --> 00:18:05,373 First we finish here, 273 00:18:05,451 --> 00:18:08,284 then we locate the young man. 274 00:18:10,756 --> 00:18:12,849 What a night. 275 00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:25,361 Go! 276 00:18:39,384 --> 00:18:40,749 Wow. 277 00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:53,564 Hey. Hey. Hey. 278 00:19:19,124 --> 00:19:22,651 Jeremy, you haven't even touched your breakfast. 279 00:19:22,728 --> 00:19:24,491 I'm not hungry. 280 00:19:24,563 --> 00:19:27,259 Louis, Jeremy won't eat his breakfast. 281 00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:31,259 - Eat. - Do you feel all right? 282 00:19:31,336 --> 00:19:33,736 You look a little pale. 283 00:19:33,805 --> 00:19:35,864 I'm fine. 284 00:19:35,941 --> 00:19:37,568 I'm just tired. 285 00:19:37,643 --> 00:19:39,577 What'd you do to your neck? 286 00:19:39,645 --> 00:19:43,046 I cut myself shaving. 287 00:19:43,115 --> 00:19:45,242 Morning, Mrs. Capello, Mr. Capello. 288 00:19:45,317 --> 00:19:46,409 Morning, Ralph. 289 00:19:46,485 --> 00:19:48,783 - I think I'll stay home today. - You better go on without him. 290 00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:50,378 I think he's caught something. 291 00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:54,959 I'm okay. Sort of. 292 00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:56,494 I'm just not hungry. 293 00:19:57,629 --> 00:19:59,620 Any speed traps today, Mrs. Capello? 294 00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:01,563 Lumkin Street and Fountain. 295 00:20:01,633 --> 00:20:05,330 Thanks. See you later, pal. 296 00:20:05,404 --> 00:20:06,803 Now, maybe if you'd eat something... 297 00:20:06,872 --> 00:20:08,464 Mom, please. I'm not hungry. 298 00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:10,030 All right. Go ahead. Starve yourself. 299 00:20:10,108 --> 00:20:11,405 See if I care. 300 00:20:19,751 --> 00:20:21,776 Hey. 301 00:20:21,853 --> 00:20:23,684 You don't feel warm. 302 00:20:23,755 --> 00:20:25,347 I don't get it. 303 00:20:25,424 --> 00:20:26,948 I have to go. 304 00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:30,694 But you're sick. 305 00:20:47,179 --> 00:20:48,771 Damn! 306 00:20:48,847 --> 00:20:51,338 Well done, Grimsdyke. You managed to hit the wall. 307 00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:53,976 - Sorry, Professor. - You think we're playing games here? 308 00:20:54,052 --> 00:20:56,782 The fate of the human race is hanging in the balance. 309 00:20:56,855 --> 00:20:58,322 Sorry, Professor. 310 00:20:58,390 --> 00:21:01,291 If my calculations are correct, and they always are, 311 00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:04,955 20 percent of the human race will be infected by 1990. 312 00:21:05,030 --> 00:21:07,828 Within the next decade, we'll have lost the entire North American continent, 313 00:21:07,899 --> 00:21:11,995 and by the year 2000, vampire Armageddon. 314 00:21:13,372 --> 00:21:14,464 Damn! 315 00:21:14,539 --> 00:21:16,268 Luckily for us, there's still time 316 00:21:16,341 --> 00:21:19,572 while the threat is still containable, localized. 317 00:21:19,645 --> 00:21:23,581 Someday we'll be revered as heroes, you and I. 318 00:21:23,649 --> 00:21:28,416 Meantime, the teenager in the red convertible must die. 319 00:21:42,367 --> 00:21:44,562 What about Casey Baldwin? Would you do it with him? 320 00:21:44,636 --> 00:21:46,729 No way. I hate jocks. 321 00:21:46,805 --> 00:21:48,739 What about Matt Newberry? 322 00:21:48,807 --> 00:21:50,741 God, I get hot just mentioning his name! 323 00:21:50,809 --> 00:21:52,674 He's too status conscious. 324 00:21:52,744 --> 00:21:55,508 Darla, you wouldn't do it with anybody. 325 00:21:55,580 --> 00:21:57,172 - Well... - Wait a minute. 326 00:21:57,249 --> 00:21:58,944 What about Tom Cruise? 327 00:21:59,017 --> 00:22:00,746 Okay, you can put him down as a "maybe." 328 00:22:00,819 --> 00:22:04,778 Are you just saying that because he's not here? 329 00:22:04,856 --> 00:22:06,824 Hi, Jeremy. I heard you were sick. 330 00:22:06,892 --> 00:22:08,484 - Yeah. - Yeah, he had a bad night. 331 00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:10,255 Excuse us, please. 332 00:22:10,329 --> 00:22:11,728 Ralph, we have to talk. 333 00:22:11,797 --> 00:22:14,459 That girl's crazy about you, man. I can't believe you don't go for her. 334 00:22:14,533 --> 00:22:16,728 - Not now, Ralph. - Well, put in a good word for me. 335 00:22:18,437 --> 00:22:20,803 - Do you know anything about that guy? - Why? 336 00:22:20,872 --> 00:22:22,897 Well, he keeps staring at me in algebra. 337 00:22:22,974 --> 00:22:24,908 That's Jeremy Capello. 338 00:22:24,976 --> 00:22:27,877 - Don't tell me you want him. - Very funny, Gloria. 339 00:22:27,946 --> 00:22:30,813 - We are in deep shit. - What are you talking about? 340 00:22:30,882 --> 00:22:33,749 Last night, after we left the Gardner place, somebody torched it. 341 00:22:33,819 --> 00:22:35,878 - What? - The police think it was arson. 342 00:22:35,954 --> 00:22:37,717 Don't you see? We were there. 343 00:22:37,789 --> 00:22:39,723 Yeah, but we didn't do anything. 344 00:22:39,791 --> 00:22:41,725 I mean, nobody even knows we were there... 345 00:22:41,793 --> 00:22:43,283 except the guy who busted in on you. 346 00:22:43,362 --> 00:22:44,386 Right. Exactly. 347 00:22:44,463 --> 00:22:46,454 What if he sets us up? 348 00:22:46,531 --> 00:22:48,192 Who's gonna believe a couple of high school kids? 349 00:22:48,266 --> 00:22:50,393 Okay, look, let's calm down, okay? Let's not panic. 350 00:22:50,469 --> 00:22:53,666 Ralph, I think someone's following me. 351 00:22:53,739 --> 00:22:55,138 What are you talking about? Who? 352 00:22:55,207 --> 00:22:57,072 I don't know. Some guy. 353 00:22:57,142 --> 00:22:58,871 Maybe a cop. 354 00:22:58,944 --> 00:23:00,912 Cops? 355 00:23:00,979 --> 00:23:03,038 Our lives are over. 356 00:23:03,115 --> 00:23:05,208 We're talking prison. 357 00:23:05,283 --> 00:23:08,150 We're talking homosexual rape by convicts named Bruno. 358 00:23:08,220 --> 00:23:12,054 Hey, listen, we didn't do anything. 359 00:23:12,124 --> 00:23:14,592 - We got nothing to worry about, right? - Right. 360 00:23:20,766 --> 00:23:21,858 There it is, Professor. 361 00:23:21,933 --> 00:23:23,901 That's the demon's car, remember? 362 00:23:23,969 --> 00:23:26,836 Be patient, my fat friend. We'll get him. 363 00:23:28,306 --> 00:23:29,671 Park over there. 364 00:23:42,788 --> 00:23:44,380 Here. I can't drink this. 365 00:23:44,456 --> 00:23:47,186 I thought cherry was your favorite. 366 00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:48,920 Not today. 367 00:23:52,731 --> 00:23:54,255 That's him. 368 00:23:57,068 --> 00:23:58,535 Stay with him! 369 00:23:58,603 --> 00:24:00,594 Don't let him get away! 370 00:24:00,672 --> 00:24:02,799 Hey, hey, hey! 371 00:24:05,644 --> 00:24:07,874 Damn! 372 00:24:13,585 --> 00:24:15,780 Tell me that isn't the same white van from last night. 373 00:24:15,854 --> 00:24:16,946 What? 374 00:24:17,022 --> 00:24:18,614 It's probably nothing to worry about, right? 375 00:24:22,928 --> 00:24:24,225 We're dead. 376 00:24:27,365 --> 00:24:28,889 See? Nothing. 377 00:24:28,967 --> 00:24:32,130 I wasn't really worried. Just after last night... 378 00:24:32,204 --> 00:24:34,968 After last night, you're paranoid as hell. 379 00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:36,667 Damn right. 380 00:24:38,877 --> 00:24:41,471 - Shit! - What? 381 00:24:41,546 --> 00:24:44,037 That's him, Nora's husband. 382 00:24:44,115 --> 00:24:46,948 Where'd your mom say that speed trap was today? 383 00:24:47,018 --> 00:24:50,215 Lumkin Street and Fountain. Why? 384 00:24:50,288 --> 00:24:52,188 Hang on, man. Here we go. 385 00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:03,700 Yeah! 386 00:25:24,322 --> 00:25:26,483 I am an animal! 387 00:25:45,443 --> 00:25:47,343 I knew it. 388 00:25:55,453 --> 00:25:58,445 - God, I'm sorry! - You! 389 00:25:58,523 --> 00:26:00,218 Hi... 390 00:26:02,360 --> 00:26:03,793 Are you okay? 391 00:26:03,862 --> 00:26:05,762 Nothing's broken, if that's what you mean. 392 00:26:05,830 --> 00:26:07,354 Look, I'm really sorry, okay? 393 00:26:07,432 --> 00:26:09,764 How come you keep staring at me in algebra? 394 00:26:09,834 --> 00:26:12,325 - I wasn't staring. - Yes, you were. 395 00:26:12,404 --> 00:26:13,894 All right. I was staring. 396 00:26:13,972 --> 00:26:16,167 I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. 397 00:26:17,676 --> 00:26:19,303 Come on. 398 00:26:19,377 --> 00:26:21,072 - Come on. - What? 399 00:26:21,146 --> 00:26:23,444 Go. Go! 400 00:26:23,515 --> 00:26:25,039 In here. 401 00:26:25,116 --> 00:26:26,777 You're very weird. Do you know that? 402 00:26:26,851 --> 00:26:28,318 - Just get down. - What? 403 00:26:28,386 --> 00:26:29,819 What? What? 404 00:26:29,888 --> 00:26:31,150 - There's someone following me. - Who? 405 00:26:31,222 --> 00:26:32,621 I don't know. I think he's a cop. 406 00:26:32,691 --> 00:26:34,124 Really? What did you do? 407 00:26:34,192 --> 00:26:35,750 Nothing. It's a long story. 408 00:26:35,827 --> 00:26:38,057 Jeremy, are you okay? 409 00:26:38,129 --> 00:26:39,790 Do me a favor. 410 00:26:39,864 --> 00:26:43,129 Look in that mirror up there and tell me who you see. 411 00:26:43,201 --> 00:26:44,896 - No one. - Okay, good. 412 00:26:44,970 --> 00:26:48,872 Look out that glass door and tell me who you see. 413 00:26:51,176 --> 00:26:52,438 Nobody. 414 00:26:52,510 --> 00:26:53,602 Nobody? 415 00:26:55,146 --> 00:26:56,545 No, there was someone out there. 416 00:26:56,615 --> 00:26:58,048 There was this weird guy. 417 00:26:58,116 --> 00:26:59,981 Okay, that's it. 418 00:27:00,051 --> 00:27:02,884 This has really been enlightening, but I'm needed back on Earth. 419 00:27:02,954 --> 00:27:04,649 Don't let him see you leave the cooler! 420 00:27:04,723 --> 00:27:05,883 No problem. 421 00:27:05,957 --> 00:27:08,755 I'm carrying a can of invisible hair spray. 422 00:27:23,375 --> 00:27:24,899 How you feeling, Jeremy? 423 00:27:24,976 --> 00:27:27,240 I'm okay. I'm just tired. 424 00:27:27,312 --> 00:27:29,746 Well, drink plenty of liquids. That's the thing. 425 00:27:29,814 --> 00:27:32,476 Yeah. I think it's a protein deficiency. 426 00:27:32,550 --> 00:27:34,347 I'm making a protein shake. 427 00:27:34,419 --> 00:27:36,614 Your mom said a girl named Candy called today. 428 00:27:38,890 --> 00:27:40,448 That's a great name. 429 00:27:40,525 --> 00:27:43,551 Candy. Sounds yummy. 430 00:27:43,628 --> 00:27:45,425 Yeah. She's a cheerleader. 431 00:27:45,497 --> 00:27:46,862 Blonde hair, all that stuff. 432 00:27:46,931 --> 00:27:48,091 Big deal. 433 00:27:48,166 --> 00:27:49,997 Women can really be a bother, can't they? 434 00:27:50,068 --> 00:27:52,468 Calling you all the time, wanting to go out. 435 00:27:52,537 --> 00:27:55,665 It's missing something. 436 00:27:55,740 --> 00:27:58,937 Well, it's been nice having this little man-to-man chat with you, son. 437 00:27:59,010 --> 00:28:00,739 Night, Dad. 438 00:28:58,269 --> 00:29:00,260 Protein drink, huh? 439 00:29:17,288 --> 00:29:19,279 Wake up, Jeremy. 440 00:29:20,492 --> 00:29:22,517 Jeremy. 441 00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:24,221 We have to talk. 442 00:29:24,295 --> 00:29:25,489 Shit! 443 00:29:26,998 --> 00:29:29,125 I'm too young to go to jail. 444 00:29:30,401 --> 00:29:32,835 Permit me to introduce myself. 445 00:29:32,904 --> 00:29:35,065 I am Modoc, at your service. 446 00:29:35,140 --> 00:29:36,937 You mean you're not a cop? 447 00:29:37,008 --> 00:29:40,637 Jeremy, it has come to my attention that you have recently had 448 00:29:40,712 --> 00:29:44,876 a sordid sexual encounter with a strange and beautiful woman. 449 00:29:44,949 --> 00:29:46,940 It wasn't sordid. 450 00:29:47,018 --> 00:29:48,883 You were bitten by this woman, were you not? 451 00:29:48,953 --> 00:29:51,046 That's none of your damn business! 452 00:29:51,122 --> 00:29:53,716 Jeremy, this woman was... 453 00:29:53,792 --> 00:29:56,784 how shall I say... infected. 454 00:29:56,861 --> 00:29:58,886 Oh, God. 455 00:29:58,963 --> 00:30:01,932 She looked so clean. 456 00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:03,865 It's all right. 457 00:30:03,935 --> 00:30:07,393 I'll cooperate, but please don't tell my parents. 458 00:30:07,472 --> 00:30:12,739 I think I'm missing something in the translation here. 459 00:30:14,813 --> 00:30:17,509 You're not from the health department. 460 00:30:17,582 --> 00:30:19,243 No. 461 00:30:27,025 --> 00:30:29,619 All right. What is this all about? 462 00:30:29,694 --> 00:30:32,185 Have you experienced anything strange 463 00:30:32,263 --> 00:30:34,857 or unusual during the past 24 hours? 464 00:30:34,933 --> 00:30:36,560 Just you. 465 00:30:39,204 --> 00:30:40,193 How about them? 466 00:30:40,271 --> 00:30:42,296 A couple of stupid dogs. Big deal. 467 00:30:42,373 --> 00:30:44,238 They know, Jeremy. 468 00:30:44,309 --> 00:30:47,676 When that woman bit you, she transferred a legacy unto you... 469 00:30:47,745 --> 00:30:50,908 the legacy of a secret society which has endured for centuries. 470 00:30:50,982 --> 00:30:52,506 You're not like other people anymore. 471 00:30:52,584 --> 00:30:53,778 Come on. Who the hell are you? 472 00:30:53,852 --> 00:30:55,285 A new awareness is arising within you. 473 00:30:55,353 --> 00:30:56,581 New desires, even as we speak. 474 00:30:56,654 --> 00:30:58,019 - You can feel it, can't you? - No! 475 00:30:58,089 --> 00:30:59,920 No longer will you tread with ordinary men. 476 00:30:59,991 --> 00:31:01,583 Get to the point! 477 00:31:03,094 --> 00:31:05,892 All right. All right. 478 00:31:05,964 --> 00:31:08,524 In a nutshell, you're alive, but you're not alive. 479 00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:10,295 You're dead, but you're not dead. 480 00:31:10,368 --> 00:31:12,802 Did you ever hear the word "undead"? 481 00:31:12,871 --> 00:31:14,930 How about this one..."vampire"? 482 00:31:15,006 --> 00:31:18,407 I hope you've heard that one, because that's what you are, okay? 483 00:31:18,476 --> 00:31:20,137 A vampire. 484 00:31:21,746 --> 00:31:24,340 I wanted to break it to you nice and easy, but no. 485 00:31:24,415 --> 00:31:26,645 Everything with you young people has to be fast, fast, fast. 486 00:31:26,718 --> 00:31:29,016 - Get out of here. - I know. It's a shock. 487 00:31:29,087 --> 00:31:30,952 No one wants to believe it can happen to them. 488 00:31:31,022 --> 00:31:32,512 - I'm not a vampire. - What's going on? 489 00:31:32,590 --> 00:31:34,353 Honey? 490 00:31:34,425 --> 00:31:35,858 - Get out of here! - Jeremy? 491 00:31:35,927 --> 00:31:37,155 Hi. 492 00:31:37,228 --> 00:31:38,855 I thought I heard you talking to somebody. 493 00:31:38,930 --> 00:31:41,398 No. It was the radio. 494 00:31:41,466 --> 00:31:43,934 No. It didn't sound like the radio. 495 00:31:44,002 --> 00:31:46,334 It sounded like a man's voice. 496 00:31:48,940 --> 00:31:51,067 Well, good night. 497 00:32:21,539 --> 00:32:23,507 You leave me alone. Get out of here! 498 00:32:23,574 --> 00:32:24,563 I am not a vampire! 499 00:32:24,642 --> 00:32:26,974 And what makes you so sure? 500 00:32:27,045 --> 00:32:29,639 Vampires drink virgin blood, right? 501 00:32:29,714 --> 00:32:32,615 I'm not a virgin. Ask Jenny Cicero. 502 00:32:32,684 --> 00:32:33,776 Louis? 503 00:32:33,851 --> 00:32:35,011 Come here. 504 00:32:35,086 --> 00:32:37,554 Haven't you noticed your complexion turning pale? 505 00:32:37,622 --> 00:32:38,919 What about it? 506 00:32:38,990 --> 00:32:42,084 How about that uncomfortable glare you're beginning to feel from the sun? 507 00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:43,627 I can explain that. 508 00:32:43,695 --> 00:32:46,255 - Your loss of appetite? - Protein deficiency! 509 00:32:46,331 --> 00:32:47,958 How about your craving for raw meat? 510 00:32:48,032 --> 00:32:50,523 - More precisely, fresh blood? - That's not true. 511 00:32:50,601 --> 00:32:52,262 Do you recognize this man? 512 00:32:53,972 --> 00:32:56,600 You are in grave danger, Jeremy. 513 00:32:56,674 --> 00:32:58,471 Wait, wait, wait. This... 514 00:32:58,543 --> 00:33:00,272 This guy's been following me. 515 00:33:00,345 --> 00:33:02,074 We need to talk. 516 00:33:02,146 --> 00:33:03,477 What? 517 00:33:03,548 --> 00:33:05,482 Who's that man? 518 00:33:06,551 --> 00:33:08,018 Get in the car. 519 00:33:08,086 --> 00:33:09,383 I don't know. 520 00:33:09,454 --> 00:33:11,149 He's not from the neighborhood. 521 00:33:14,559 --> 00:33:17,153 This man is Professor Leopold McCarthy, 522 00:33:17,228 --> 00:33:21,164 a noted historian by profession, a ruthless murderer by choice. 523 00:33:21,232 --> 00:33:23,029 Together with his feeble-minded assistant, 524 00:33:23,101 --> 00:33:25,569 he's waged a war against our kind for 20 years, 525 00:33:25,636 --> 00:33:29,265 and he will not rest until he has wiped the last of us from the face of the earth. 526 00:33:29,340 --> 00:33:30,329 "Us"? 527 00:33:30,408 --> 00:33:34,105 - Vampires? - Stop the car, freako. 528 00:33:34,178 --> 00:33:36,612 I'm here to help make the transition 529 00:33:36,681 --> 00:33:40,139 from your old life to your new life as easy as possible. 530 00:33:40,218 --> 00:33:42,152 For the next few days, I shall be your tutor 531 00:33:42,220 --> 00:33:44,586 and hopefully your friend. 532 00:33:44,655 --> 00:33:48,853 If you are a vampire, how can you be out in the daylight? 533 00:33:48,926 --> 00:33:50,826 Undead vampires must remain in the dark. 534 00:33:50,895 --> 00:33:52,829 But you and I are living vampires. 535 00:33:52,897 --> 00:33:55,331 You will find that and other useful information 536 00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:57,960 covered in this. 537 00:33:58,036 --> 00:33:59,765 "Vampirism. 538 00:33:59,837 --> 00:34:02,772 A Practical Guide to an Alternative Lifestyle"? 539 00:34:02,840 --> 00:34:05,809 That is your Bible. Read it, learn it, live it. 540 00:34:05,877 --> 00:34:08,004 - That's it. - At least take this. 541 00:34:09,047 --> 00:34:10,344 What? What is this? 542 00:34:10,415 --> 00:34:12,178 That's the name of a reliable all-night butcher. 543 00:34:13,351 --> 00:34:16,411 There's no getting around it, kid. Vampires drink blood. 544 00:34:16,487 --> 00:34:19,115 We suggest pigs' blood, B-negative. 545 00:34:19,190 --> 00:34:23,456 I think you'll find it surprisingly full-bodied with a smooth flavor. 546 00:34:23,528 --> 00:34:25,860 Just pull over and let me out, all right? 547 00:34:25,930 --> 00:34:27,727 All right, all right. 548 00:34:27,799 --> 00:34:29,232 Believe me, I know how you feel. 549 00:34:29,300 --> 00:34:32,326 But read your handbook, get some sunglasses, 550 00:34:32,403 --> 00:34:34,530 and don't fret over drinking a little blood. 551 00:34:34,605 --> 00:34:37,506 Think of it as taking your vitamins. 552 00:34:37,575 --> 00:34:39,236 I am not a vampire! 553 00:34:39,310 --> 00:34:42,177 Well, I'll pop up from time to time just to see how you're getting on. 554 00:34:42,246 --> 00:34:44,510 Don't bother, 'cause I never want to see you again. 555 00:34:44,582 --> 00:34:46,709 And I'm not reading this book! 556 00:34:47,885 --> 00:34:50,217 And I'm not a vampire! 557 00:35:01,132 --> 00:35:02,827 I'm intrigued by her. 558 00:35:02,900 --> 00:35:04,834 There's definitely more to this girl than meets the eye. 559 00:35:04,902 --> 00:35:08,235 Yeah, I hope so, for your sake. 560 00:35:08,306 --> 00:35:09,739 All right, Ralph. 561 00:35:09,807 --> 00:35:13,265 As much as I hate it, it's your turn to drive. 562 00:35:13,344 --> 00:35:15,835 You're next, Capello. In the back. 563 00:35:15,913 --> 00:35:19,440 This time, try and stay with him. 564 00:35:19,517 --> 00:35:21,485 I will, Professor. 565 00:35:21,552 --> 00:35:23,417 I warn you, any nonsense, 566 00:35:23,488 --> 00:35:26,389 and I'll make sure your insurance skyrockets. 567 00:35:27,925 --> 00:35:30,485 Constant, gentle pressure on the accelerator. 568 00:35:30,561 --> 00:35:32,654 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Turn left here. 569 00:35:32,730 --> 00:35:34,994 You failed to check your mirrors. 570 00:35:37,335 --> 00:35:38,359 Shit! 571 00:35:38,436 --> 00:35:40,131 - I beg your pardon. - Shit! 572 00:35:40,204 --> 00:35:41,796 What the hell are you doing? 573 00:35:45,776 --> 00:35:48,074 - Yeah! - Ralph, look out! 574 00:35:55,386 --> 00:35:57,286 Where are you going? 575 00:35:57,355 --> 00:36:00,290 Oh, my God, watch it! Watch these people! 576 00:36:04,662 --> 00:36:06,527 "Endangering pedestrians." 577 00:36:10,067 --> 00:36:12,535 Look out! 578 00:36:12,603 --> 00:36:14,036 Easy, easy! 579 00:36:16,007 --> 00:36:19,374 - Watch that guy! - Hey, look out! 580 00:36:19,443 --> 00:36:21,911 You will never drive in this town again. 581 00:36:32,156 --> 00:36:33,987 Grimsdyke. 582 00:36:34,058 --> 00:36:35,150 That's it! 583 00:36:35,226 --> 00:36:37,160 Fine. Let's bounce this bozo. 584 00:36:37,228 --> 00:36:39,458 Get back here, young man! 585 00:36:39,530 --> 00:36:42,431 Hey! You got a problem, pal? 586 00:36:42,500 --> 00:36:43,899 He's attacking! 587 00:36:47,171 --> 00:36:48,433 Oh, shit! 588 00:36:56,347 --> 00:36:57,609 Damn! 589 00:37:00,651 --> 00:37:03,119 - Ralph. - I saw that! 590 00:37:03,187 --> 00:37:05,655 Your driving frightened that man into an accident! 591 00:37:05,723 --> 00:37:07,714 More points! 592 00:37:07,792 --> 00:37:10,317 Hey! Come back here! 593 00:37:31,148 --> 00:37:32,638 Hi. 594 00:37:32,717 --> 00:37:35,015 You're staring at me again. 595 00:37:35,086 --> 00:37:38,852 Look, I'm really sorry about yesterday. 596 00:37:38,923 --> 00:37:40,686 I really made a jerk of myself. 597 00:37:40,758 --> 00:37:43,352 You know, you make me very nervous. 598 00:37:43,427 --> 00:37:45,725 I had a dream about you the other night. 599 00:37:45,796 --> 00:37:48,162 Are you gonna gross me out? 600 00:37:48,232 --> 00:37:50,166 No, it wasn't like that. 601 00:37:51,636 --> 00:37:54,833 Would you go out with me sometime? 602 00:37:57,341 --> 00:37:59,741 I don't know. Maybe. 603 00:37:59,810 --> 00:38:02,108 You let me slip through your fingers, and you'll always regret it. 604 00:38:05,149 --> 00:38:07,947 Well, okay. 605 00:38:08,019 --> 00:38:10,146 - Really? - Yeah. 606 00:38:10,221 --> 00:38:13,713 Great! I'll pick you up at 7:00. 607 00:38:13,791 --> 00:38:16,419 - Wait. Tonight? - Why not? 608 00:38:18,462 --> 00:38:20,123 What did he want? 609 00:38:20,197 --> 00:38:23,030 Guess what. I've got a date for tonight! 610 00:38:23,100 --> 00:38:24,761 Not with that geek. 611 00:38:24,835 --> 00:38:26,462 Darla, he's all wrong. 612 00:38:26,537 --> 00:38:29,165 Shut up, Gloria. 613 00:38:29,240 --> 00:38:31,765 He dreamed about me. 614 00:38:55,599 --> 00:38:56,861 The mirror's not working. 615 00:39:00,204 --> 00:39:02,695 Great. Great. 616 00:39:17,621 --> 00:39:19,885 Doesn't anything in this house work? 617 00:39:30,868 --> 00:39:33,564 - You must be Jeremy. - We're so happy to see you. 618 00:39:33,637 --> 00:39:36,003 Don't block the doorway, Helen. Let the boy come in. 619 00:39:36,073 --> 00:39:39,236 I'm Darla's father, Buddy Blake. 620 00:39:39,310 --> 00:39:40,902 You can call me Buddy. 621 00:39:40,978 --> 00:39:42,570 Okay, Buddy. 622 00:39:42,646 --> 00:39:44,773 - This is my wife Helen. - Hi. 623 00:39:44,849 --> 00:39:46,476 You're a sharp-Iooking boy. 624 00:39:46,550 --> 00:39:48,518 Isn't he a sharp-Iooking boy, Buddy? 625 00:39:48,586 --> 00:39:50,520 He certainly is. 626 00:39:50,588 --> 00:39:53,751 Well, let's see if Darla's ready. 627 00:39:55,059 --> 00:39:56,959 Princess! 628 00:39:57,027 --> 00:39:58,722 Your escort is here! 629 00:39:58,796 --> 00:40:00,730 Coming! 630 00:40:00,798 --> 00:40:03,392 Would you like a drink, Jeremy? 631 00:40:03,467 --> 00:40:06,027 No. I'm driving. 632 00:40:07,204 --> 00:40:09,502 Of course. Good answer. 633 00:40:09,573 --> 00:40:11,973 There she is. 634 00:40:12,042 --> 00:40:14,135 Isn't she lovely? 635 00:40:14,211 --> 00:40:16,577 Come on, Mom. Cut it out. 636 00:40:21,619 --> 00:40:23,917 They make a really cute couple, don't they, Helen? 637 00:40:23,988 --> 00:40:25,285 Just like us. 638 00:40:25,356 --> 00:40:26,482 - Hi. - Hi. 639 00:40:26,557 --> 00:40:28,286 Okay, kids. Up against the wall. 640 00:40:28,359 --> 00:40:29,656 Mom! 641 00:40:29,727 --> 00:40:34,061 Come on now. Don't spoil your father's fun. 642 00:40:34,131 --> 00:40:36,497 Ready now? Okay. 643 00:40:36,567 --> 00:40:38,228 Oh, wait. Wait. 644 00:40:38,302 --> 00:40:40,202 Helen, they're perfect. 645 00:40:40,271 --> 00:40:43,570 This is totally humiliating! 646 00:40:43,641 --> 00:40:46,906 Okay, big smiles now. 647 00:40:46,977 --> 00:40:47,966 One more. 648 00:40:48,045 --> 00:40:49,774 - One more for Grandma. - Say "cheese." 649 00:40:51,348 --> 00:40:53,009 Look, we're late. We've gotta go. Bye. 650 00:40:53,083 --> 00:40:55,017 Have a good time, Princess. 651 00:41:02,326 --> 00:41:04,760 I'm really sorry about that. 652 00:41:04,829 --> 00:41:06,888 Look, I understand. Don't worry about it. 653 00:41:06,964 --> 00:41:09,432 I have parents, too. 654 00:41:09,500 --> 00:41:11,934 - Damn! - What's wrong? 655 00:41:12,002 --> 00:41:13,993 Didn't they turn out? 656 00:41:16,740 --> 00:41:18,002 Piece of junk. 657 00:41:21,579 --> 00:41:24,480 Okay, you ordered one garbage can pizza, 658 00:41:24,548 --> 00:41:27,745 double on everything but anchovies. 659 00:41:27,818 --> 00:41:29,718 Thank you. 660 00:41:29,787 --> 00:41:31,812 But Ralph isn't really a jerk. 661 00:41:31,889 --> 00:41:35,120 He's... He's a good guy at heart. 662 00:41:35,192 --> 00:41:39,526 But he... he thinks that I should only date gorgeous girls 663 00:41:39,597 --> 00:41:41,565 who have big... 664 00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:45,769 Big boobs and long, blonde hair 665 00:41:45,836 --> 00:41:48,737 - and beautifully suntanned skin and... - Ditzy. 666 00:41:48,806 --> 00:41:51,866 When it comes to girls, Ralph's only interested in one thing. 667 00:41:51,942 --> 00:41:53,170 You know. 668 00:41:53,244 --> 00:41:54,871 Yeah, I know. 669 00:41:54,945 --> 00:41:58,711 Ralph is... can be a jerk sometimes, 670 00:41:58,782 --> 00:42:01,080 but he's my best friend. 671 00:42:01,151 --> 00:42:04,484 And, what can I say? 672 00:42:04,555 --> 00:42:06,716 That's okay. I understand. 673 00:42:06,790 --> 00:42:09,350 Gloria doesn't exactly think you're hot stuff, either. 674 00:42:09,426 --> 00:42:11,519 - Yeah? - Yeah. 675 00:42:12,530 --> 00:42:16,125 Well, I'm glad they don't pick our dates, I guess. 676 00:42:17,201 --> 00:42:19,669 Jeremy, are you okay? 677 00:42:21,972 --> 00:42:23,405 Yeah. 678 00:42:23,474 --> 00:42:26,807 I'm suddenly not hungry. 679 00:42:26,877 --> 00:42:28,504 You know, I heard you've been sick lately. 680 00:42:28,579 --> 00:42:31,514 - It's nothing, really. - Well, maybe you have an allergy. 681 00:42:31,582 --> 00:42:34,779 Excuse me, but what's on this pizza? 682 00:42:34,852 --> 00:42:36,183 You ordered everything. 683 00:42:36,253 --> 00:42:37,618 That's pepperoni, sausage, 684 00:42:37,688 --> 00:42:40,987 tomatoes, mushrooms, onions, olives, peppers and garlic. 685 00:42:43,661 --> 00:42:44,753 Garlic. 686 00:42:51,602 --> 00:42:52,728 That's his car. 687 00:42:52,803 --> 00:42:54,293 We've found him. 688 00:43:18,896 --> 00:43:20,386 Shit! 689 00:43:31,342 --> 00:43:33,776 It's a beautiful night. 690 00:43:33,844 --> 00:43:36,369 Yeah. I like the dark. 691 00:43:36,447 --> 00:43:39,610 I think I'm a night person. 692 00:43:39,683 --> 00:43:42,777 Jeremy, why did you ask me out? 693 00:43:44,021 --> 00:43:46,080 Well, I don't know. 694 00:43:46,156 --> 00:43:48,818 You see someone you like, you wanna know them better, 695 00:43:48,892 --> 00:43:51,292 you ask them out. 696 00:43:51,362 --> 00:43:54,354 And because I wanna prove to you I'm not the big jerk that you think I am. 697 00:43:54,431 --> 00:43:56,296 I don't think you're a big jerk. 698 00:43:56,367 --> 00:43:58,232 Gloria does, but I don't. 699 00:43:58,302 --> 00:43:59,792 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 700 00:43:59,870 --> 00:44:02,566 Well, Ralph thinks you're a musical freak or something. 701 00:44:02,640 --> 00:44:05,006 Well, Gloria says you're... 702 00:44:05,075 --> 00:44:07,475 you're a repulsive, sickly slimeball. 703 00:44:07,544 --> 00:44:08,806 - Yeah? - Yeah. 704 00:44:08,879 --> 00:44:10,608 Ralph says... 705 00:44:10,681 --> 00:44:12,308 Wait. That's his problem. 706 00:44:12,383 --> 00:44:15,477 I like you just the way you are. 707 00:44:15,552 --> 00:44:16,644 You're special. 708 00:44:16,720 --> 00:44:18,085 I am? 709 00:44:18,155 --> 00:44:19,782 Yeah. 710 00:44:28,098 --> 00:44:30,828 - Grimsdyke? - Yes, sir? 711 00:44:30,901 --> 00:44:32,994 I think I'll go and lie down for a bit. 712 00:44:33,070 --> 00:44:35,300 Yes, Professor. I'll take the first watch. 713 00:44:35,372 --> 00:44:39,570 Right. Call me if you witness anything unusual. 714 00:44:39,643 --> 00:44:41,770 I will, Professor. 715 00:44:51,789 --> 00:44:53,450 Grimsdyke! 716 00:44:58,028 --> 00:45:02,089 Out. Now. 717 00:45:02,166 --> 00:45:04,396 Yes, Professor. 718 00:45:17,648 --> 00:45:18,808 Jeremy. 719 00:45:38,902 --> 00:45:41,564 Jeremy, what's wrong? You're wheezing. 720 00:45:48,112 --> 00:45:49,636 Oh, no. 721 00:45:49,713 --> 00:45:52,511 Jeremy, what's wrong? You're not sick, are you? 722 00:45:54,918 --> 00:45:56,476 I have to go. 723 00:45:56,553 --> 00:45:58,384 Jeremy, what's wrong? 724 00:45:58,455 --> 00:46:00,480 Where are you going? Stop! 725 00:46:00,557 --> 00:46:02,787 Wait! You can't do this! 726 00:46:02,860 --> 00:46:05,420 Stop! Please don't go! 727 00:46:05,496 --> 00:46:08,021 You can't leave me here. 728 00:46:08,098 --> 00:46:10,032 Come back! 729 00:46:10,100 --> 00:46:12,500 Wait! 730 00:46:12,569 --> 00:46:14,503 - Where are you going? - Darla! 731 00:46:16,240 --> 00:46:18,572 What happened? 732 00:46:22,446 --> 00:46:23,879 Damn it! 733 00:46:23,947 --> 00:46:25,744 Jeremy Capello, you blew it! 734 00:46:35,025 --> 00:46:36,959 Find what you're looking for? 735 00:46:37,027 --> 00:46:39,587 Nah, the evil slime hasn't shown himse... 736 00:46:43,033 --> 00:46:44,625 Yes, he has. 737 00:46:44,701 --> 00:46:46,635 No! 738 00:46:46,703 --> 00:46:49,297 Who are you? What do you want? 739 00:46:49,373 --> 00:46:51,534 Why are you watching my house? 740 00:46:54,511 --> 00:46:56,741 Stay back! 741 00:46:56,814 --> 00:46:58,748 You don't want me! 742 00:46:58,816 --> 00:47:00,078 I'm old! 743 00:47:00,150 --> 00:47:02,584 My blood's polluted with cholesterol! 744 00:47:02,653 --> 00:47:05,178 - What? - Professor! 745 00:47:31,181 --> 00:47:32,910 Get a grip on yourself. 746 00:47:33,750 --> 00:47:35,980 Slow down, you maniac! 747 00:47:36,053 --> 00:47:38,214 You mad little bastard! What happened? 748 00:47:38,288 --> 00:47:40,279 It was horrible, Professor. 749 00:47:40,357 --> 00:47:43,053 The monster snuck up behind me! 750 00:47:45,529 --> 00:47:49,056 His eyes burned like coal. 751 00:47:49,132 --> 00:47:52,295 Fangs 3 inches long glistened in the moonlight. 752 00:47:52,369 --> 00:47:53,961 That scum! 753 00:47:54,037 --> 00:47:56,471 He had me totally under his spell! 754 00:47:56,540 --> 00:47:58,132 Thank God for this. 755 00:48:05,048 --> 00:48:07,175 Can I get you anything? 756 00:48:07,251 --> 00:48:08,741 Yes. 757 00:48:08,819 --> 00:48:10,377 I'd like a... 758 00:48:11,688 --> 00:48:14,657 a... two of those. 759 00:48:18,495 --> 00:48:19,985 Three T-bones. 760 00:48:21,531 --> 00:48:24,261 And six chickens, please. 761 00:48:25,669 --> 00:48:26,658 What else? 762 00:48:26,737 --> 00:48:29,297 I'd like a quart of pigs' blood. 763 00:48:29,373 --> 00:48:31,364 What was that last one? 764 00:48:31,441 --> 00:48:33,375 A quart of pigs' blood. 765 00:48:33,443 --> 00:48:35,707 "A quart of pigs' blood." 766 00:48:35,779 --> 00:48:37,974 - A pint. - Pint of pigs' blood. 767 00:48:43,987 --> 00:48:46,217 How much for just the blood? 768 00:48:46,290 --> 00:48:47,848 2.59. 769 00:48:49,493 --> 00:48:50,755 Thank you. 770 00:48:51,962 --> 00:48:54,294 First time, huh, kid? 771 00:48:59,136 --> 00:49:01,127 I think I'm gonna puke. 772 00:49:05,375 --> 00:49:07,206 It's not bad. 773 00:49:08,645 --> 00:49:10,044 It's not bad. 774 00:49:22,626 --> 00:49:24,890 I can't believe it. 775 00:49:24,962 --> 00:49:26,862 I'm a vampire. 776 00:50:19,716 --> 00:50:22,116 This blood's for you. 777 00:50:22,185 --> 00:50:23,652 I'm proud of you, Jeremy. 778 00:50:23,720 --> 00:50:26,382 You got my vote for Vampire Rookie of the Year. 779 00:50:26,456 --> 00:50:28,549 Why is this happening to me? 780 00:50:28,625 --> 00:50:30,991 I've been good. No drugs, no alcohol. 781 00:50:31,061 --> 00:50:34,656 I do my homework. Why me? 782 00:50:34,731 --> 00:50:39,031 Look, try not to think of this as a handicap. 783 00:50:39,102 --> 00:50:41,900 I mean, there are a lot worse things than being a vampire. 784 00:50:41,972 --> 00:50:44,236 Are you aware that one of past presidents 785 00:50:44,307 --> 00:50:46,502 of these United States was a vampire? 786 00:50:46,576 --> 00:50:48,009 Which one? 787 00:50:48,078 --> 00:50:49,545 That's not the point. 788 00:50:49,613 --> 00:50:52,173 I'm trying to illustrate that life can still be full, 789 00:50:52,249 --> 00:50:54,114 it can still be rewarding, 790 00:50:54,184 --> 00:50:57,153 that there are certain advantages to being a vampire. 791 00:50:57,220 --> 00:51:00,189 Yeah? Name one. 792 00:51:00,257 --> 00:51:01,952 All right. 793 00:51:02,025 --> 00:51:04,357 How old do you think I am? 794 00:51:04,428 --> 00:51:07,363 I don't know. 40? 50? So what? 795 00:51:09,066 --> 00:51:10,533 This coming October, 796 00:51:10,600 --> 00:51:15,401 I shall celebrate my 265th birthday. 797 00:51:15,472 --> 00:51:18,908 For every decade, you shall age but a single year. 798 00:51:18,975 --> 00:51:21,034 That's not a bad deal. 799 00:51:21,111 --> 00:51:22,169 What? 800 00:51:23,346 --> 00:51:26,008 Wait. You're telling me that I'm gonna be a teenager 801 00:51:26,083 --> 00:51:27,846 for another 20 years? 802 00:51:27,918 --> 00:51:30,079 Are you gonna sit around and sulk for the next century? 803 00:51:30,153 --> 00:51:32,121 No. 804 00:51:32,189 --> 00:51:34,419 But I deserve a few minutes. 805 00:51:35,759 --> 00:51:37,590 I happen to like garlic. 806 00:51:37,661 --> 00:51:39,424 Well, it's a minor loss. 807 00:51:39,496 --> 00:51:41,657 Garlic just doesn't go with blood. 808 00:51:41,731 --> 00:51:43,858 But there are compensations. 809 00:51:43,934 --> 00:51:46,164 With a long life, you're gonna have a chance 810 00:51:46,236 --> 00:51:48,431 to meet some of the most fascinating people on earth. 811 00:51:48,505 --> 00:51:50,700 Over the years, I've known people 812 00:51:50,774 --> 00:51:53,265 like Pablo Picasso, Sigmund Freud, 813 00:51:53,343 --> 00:51:55,573 Isabel Watson, Madame Curie. 814 00:51:55,645 --> 00:51:57,237 Who's Isabel Watson? 815 00:51:57,314 --> 00:51:58,747 Trust me, she was fascinating. 816 00:51:58,815 --> 00:52:00,544 What's more, with time on your side, 817 00:52:00,617 --> 00:52:03,347 you're gonna have the opportunity to pursue your interests to their fullest. 818 00:52:03,420 --> 00:52:05,251 You sound like my guidance counselor. 819 00:52:05,322 --> 00:52:07,483 Look, all I'm trying to say is that 820 00:52:07,557 --> 00:52:10,685 whether you're a vampire or a regular person, 821 00:52:10,760 --> 00:52:13,923 you must set goals, make plans, live a full life. 822 00:52:13,997 --> 00:52:15,225 You can live several of them. 823 00:52:15,298 --> 00:52:18,062 Well, that's just great, but you're forgetting one thing. 824 00:52:18,135 --> 00:52:21,593 I made a fool of myself with Darla because I'm a vampire. 825 00:52:21,671 --> 00:52:24,834 Come on. Men have been making fools of themselves for centuries 826 00:52:24,908 --> 00:52:27,001 where women are concerned. 827 00:52:27,077 --> 00:52:30,376 Luckily for us, they rather like it. 828 00:52:30,447 --> 00:52:33,109 She'll come around as soon as she thinks you've suffered enough. 829 00:52:33,183 --> 00:52:34,241 No, no. 830 00:52:34,317 --> 00:52:37,013 You don't know Darla Blake. 831 00:52:37,087 --> 00:52:41,114 Then again, there are the powers. 832 00:52:41,191 --> 00:52:42,658 Powers? 833 00:52:44,027 --> 00:52:45,358 I wish you'd read that book. 834 00:52:45,428 --> 00:52:47,589 I mean, you might find some pleasant surprises in there, 835 00:52:47,664 --> 00:52:52,158 like how to emit a certain irresistible charm. 836 00:52:52,235 --> 00:52:54,863 - What page? - Try the index under "Trances." 837 00:52:57,174 --> 00:53:00,109 Hey, hey. Can I turn into a bat? 838 00:53:00,177 --> 00:53:01,838 Don't be silly. 839 00:53:14,858 --> 00:53:16,257 Darla, hi. 840 00:53:16,326 --> 00:53:18,419 Listen, I wanna explain about last night. 841 00:53:18,495 --> 00:53:21,293 Look, you don't have to. You came through loud and clear. 842 00:53:21,364 --> 00:53:22,729 No, you don't understand. 843 00:53:22,799 --> 00:53:25,165 I've had something happen to me recently. I've been going through some changes. 844 00:53:25,235 --> 00:53:28,170 Yeah, it's called puberty, jerk, and she's not interested. 845 00:53:28,238 --> 00:53:30,035 Gloria, give it a rest, okay? 846 00:53:30,106 --> 00:53:32,870 Darla, don't give in. He made a fool out of you. 847 00:53:32,943 --> 00:53:35,844 Gloria's right, you know? And you're doing it again. 848 00:53:35,912 --> 00:53:37,209 Look, I'm sorry. 849 00:53:37,280 --> 00:53:39,805 First date's always the worst, right? 850 00:53:39,883 --> 00:53:41,714 - Just give me one more chance. - Why should I? 851 00:53:41,785 --> 00:53:45,221 Because I like you and because I don't want our relationship 852 00:53:45,288 --> 00:53:46,550 to end before it begins. 853 00:53:46,623 --> 00:53:49,091 I have to get back to practice. 854 00:53:50,727 --> 00:53:51,716 Darla... 855 00:53:56,066 --> 00:53:57,294 come back. 856 00:53:59,769 --> 00:54:02,533 Raise your right hand. 857 00:54:08,345 --> 00:54:10,540 When I snap my fingers, 858 00:54:10,614 --> 00:54:14,812 you will awaken, you will accept my apology, 859 00:54:14,884 --> 00:54:17,250 and you will go out with me on Saturday night. 860 00:54:17,320 --> 00:54:19,652 Do you understand? 861 00:54:24,027 --> 00:54:26,018 You've gotta be kidding. 862 00:54:44,014 --> 00:54:45,982 Our next selection is from Barry Manilow, 863 00:54:46,049 --> 00:54:48,415 - the man who writes the songs... - Barry Manilow! 864 00:54:48,485 --> 00:54:49,884 Save it. 865 00:54:55,158 --> 00:54:57,149 Oh, no! 866 00:55:13,143 --> 00:55:15,907 - Hi, Mrs. Capello. - Hi, Ralph. 867 00:55:15,979 --> 00:55:17,970 Oh, Ralph. 868 00:55:18,048 --> 00:55:20,812 You know, Jeremy's been acting pretty weird lately. 869 00:55:20,884 --> 00:55:23,352 Do you have any idea what's wrong with him? 870 00:55:23,420 --> 00:55:25,684 Not really. He's a pretty complicated guy. 871 00:55:25,755 --> 00:55:27,950 What do you mean? 872 00:55:28,024 --> 00:55:30,322 He's having some girl problems. 873 00:55:30,393 --> 00:55:31,553 That's probably all it is. 874 00:55:31,628 --> 00:55:35,291 Well, Ralph, see if you can find out what's bothering him, okay? 875 00:55:35,365 --> 00:55:37,799 I will, Mrs. Capello. 876 00:55:37,867 --> 00:55:39,232 My son... 877 00:55:39,302 --> 00:55:41,167 has a problem with girls? 878 00:55:41,237 --> 00:55:44,365 The goddamn white van is still following me. 879 00:55:44,441 --> 00:55:46,909 What? Why is it following you? 880 00:55:49,646 --> 00:55:52,080 - Is it gone? - Yeah. 881 00:55:53,683 --> 00:55:55,480 Man, I don't get this. 882 00:55:55,552 --> 00:55:57,110 Ralph, I've got something to tell you. 883 00:55:58,988 --> 00:56:00,114 I'm... 884 00:56:00,190 --> 00:56:02,715 I'm a vampire. 885 00:56:05,562 --> 00:56:07,086 That's cool, man. 886 00:56:07,163 --> 00:56:09,495 That's all you're gonna say to me..."That's cool"? 887 00:56:09,566 --> 00:56:11,796 Jeremy, you're my best friend. What do you want me to say? 888 00:56:11,868 --> 00:56:13,267 - "I think you're crazy"? - No, no. 889 00:56:13,336 --> 00:56:15,861 Remember I was telling you about that cop that was trailing me? 890 00:56:15,939 --> 00:56:16,928 Yeah? 891 00:56:17,006 --> 00:56:19,167 He told me that that woman who bit me was a vampire. 892 00:56:19,242 --> 00:56:20,766 He told me I was a vampire. 893 00:56:20,844 --> 00:56:22,277 A cop told you that? 894 00:56:22,345 --> 00:56:23,573 Ralph, he wasn't a cop. 895 00:56:23,646 --> 00:56:25,079 He's a vampire, too. 896 00:56:25,148 --> 00:56:26,274 Wow. 897 00:56:26,349 --> 00:56:27,816 You don't believe me, do you? 898 00:56:27,884 --> 00:56:29,943 To tell you the truth, man, I'm kinda torn. 899 00:56:30,019 --> 00:56:33,079 See, I have this problem with vampirism in general. 900 00:56:33,156 --> 00:56:36,023 Come on, let me show you something. Come on. Let's go. 901 00:56:42,465 --> 00:56:43,830 Go in. 902 00:56:49,172 --> 00:56:50,400 What? 903 00:56:50,473 --> 00:56:52,236 Watch this. 904 00:56:55,612 --> 00:56:57,102 Well? 905 00:56:57,180 --> 00:56:58,977 It's a trick. 906 00:56:59,048 --> 00:57:01,710 A trick? 907 00:57:01,785 --> 00:57:04,720 Yeah, David Copperfield does this stuff all the time. 908 00:57:04,788 --> 00:57:09,020 I once saw him make the Statue of Liberty disappear. 909 00:57:09,092 --> 00:57:10,116 Okay. 910 00:57:13,930 --> 00:57:18,629 But let me show you something David Copperfield doesn't do. 911 00:57:27,444 --> 00:57:30,072 Yeah, it's red and it's liquid. 912 00:57:30,146 --> 00:57:31,909 Is it blood? 913 00:57:43,426 --> 00:57:44,723 Hey, Ralph. 914 00:57:50,900 --> 00:57:53,926 Well, what did he say? 915 00:57:54,003 --> 00:57:55,527 You don't want to know. 916 00:57:55,605 --> 00:57:57,664 Ralph, I'm his mother. 917 00:57:57,740 --> 00:57:59,731 I want to know what's bothering him. 918 00:57:59,809 --> 00:58:01,106 No, you don't. 919 00:58:01,177 --> 00:58:02,872 Trust me. 920 00:58:02,946 --> 00:58:06,507 Some things are too personal. 921 00:58:07,917 --> 00:58:09,578 Too personal? 922 00:58:12,021 --> 00:58:14,990 Oh, my God. 923 00:58:28,238 --> 00:58:29,227 Jeremy. 924 00:58:29,305 --> 00:58:31,967 I just dropped in to say good-bye. 925 00:58:32,041 --> 00:58:33,565 You're leaving? 926 00:58:33,643 --> 00:58:35,270 My work is finished here. 927 00:58:35,345 --> 00:58:36,573 Terrific. 928 00:58:36,646 --> 00:58:39,171 My life is ruined and you're going on. 929 00:58:39,249 --> 00:58:40,546 What's gonna happen? 930 00:58:40,617 --> 00:58:42,244 Well, that's entirely up to you. 931 00:58:42,318 --> 00:58:44,718 My purpose was merely to point you in the right direction, 932 00:58:44,787 --> 00:58:47,381 not to hold your hand forever. 933 00:58:47,457 --> 00:58:50,324 You're going to be a vampire for a long, long time. 934 00:58:50,393 --> 00:58:52,327 I know. 935 00:58:52,395 --> 00:58:54,659 There's just... 936 00:58:54,731 --> 00:58:58,223 still so much I don't know. 937 00:58:58,301 --> 00:58:59,928 What if I screw up? 938 00:59:00,003 --> 00:59:03,302 What if people find out? 939 00:59:03,373 --> 00:59:05,500 Everybody screws up. 940 00:59:05,575 --> 00:59:06,940 Dead or undead. 941 00:59:07,010 --> 00:59:09,774 People who love you will always protect you. 942 00:59:09,846 --> 00:59:11,905 Remember that. 943 00:59:11,981 --> 00:59:13,710 I just got used to having you around. 944 00:59:15,251 --> 00:59:17,879 Don't get sentimental on me. 945 00:59:17,954 --> 00:59:20,286 And by the way, I'm going to need to park my car 946 00:59:20,356 --> 00:59:21,983 for the next century or so. 947 00:59:22,058 --> 00:59:25,323 - Do you think you can look after it for me? - You're kidding. 948 00:59:25,395 --> 00:59:27,522 This is great! 949 00:59:27,597 --> 00:59:29,326 Wait'll Ralph sees this. 950 00:59:31,467 --> 00:59:33,162 The Professor's after Ralph now. 951 00:59:33,236 --> 00:59:34,635 He thinks he's one of us. 952 00:59:34,704 --> 00:59:38,140 Well, it's a rather unsavory trait of man 953 00:59:38,207 --> 00:59:40,835 that whenever he stumbles across something different, 954 00:59:40,910 --> 00:59:44,311 quite often his first impulse is to destroy it. 955 00:59:44,380 --> 00:59:46,314 Vampire's are like any other minority 956 00:59:46,382 --> 00:59:49,146 that's been persecuted down through the ages. 957 00:59:49,218 --> 00:59:52,153 Our reputations are a bit more tarnished than that. 958 00:59:52,221 --> 00:59:56,157 I mean, people think we're blood-sucking monsters. 959 00:59:56,225 --> 01:00:00,719 I'm afraid a few bad apples back in the Dark Ages 960 01:00:00,797 --> 01:00:03,163 spoiled it for the rest of us. 961 01:00:03,232 --> 01:00:06,599 Professor McCarthy is not one to forgive and forget. 962 01:00:06,669 --> 01:00:09,160 What is it with this guy? What's his problem? 963 01:00:09,238 --> 01:00:12,036 He's quite mad, of course. 964 01:00:12,108 --> 01:00:14,008 But don't be misled. 965 01:00:14,077 --> 01:00:16,204 He poses a very real threat. 966 01:00:16,279 --> 01:00:18,770 What do I do? 967 01:00:18,848 --> 01:00:21,976 You're a vampire, Jeremy. 968 01:00:22,051 --> 01:00:23,951 Use it. 969 01:00:27,290 --> 01:00:32,353 Louis, Jeremy's behavior is just too peculiar to ignore. 970 01:00:32,428 --> 01:00:34,988 Ralph says he has some problem with girls. 971 01:00:35,064 --> 01:00:36,326 Yes. 972 01:00:36,399 --> 01:00:39,061 And I know I heard a man's voice 973 01:00:39,135 --> 01:00:41,535 up in his room the other night. 974 01:00:43,573 --> 01:00:45,632 The man in the BMW. 975 01:00:47,877 --> 01:00:49,401 Good night. 976 01:00:49,479 --> 01:00:52,141 Jeremy, where are you going? 977 01:00:53,282 --> 01:00:54,374 Out. 978 01:00:54,450 --> 01:00:56,509 You know your father and I are here 979 01:00:56,586 --> 01:00:59,987 to talk about anything that might be bothering you. 980 01:01:00,056 --> 01:01:01,683 That's great, Mom. 981 01:01:01,758 --> 01:01:03,191 Louis. 982 01:01:03,259 --> 01:01:04,954 Do you have anything you want to tell us? 983 01:01:05,028 --> 01:01:07,826 Just good night. 984 01:01:20,143 --> 01:01:22,475 Where did he get that car? 985 01:01:22,545 --> 01:01:25,946 It's that same Artic Blue BMW 735. 986 01:01:27,116 --> 01:01:29,209 What does that license plate mean? 987 01:01:47,804 --> 01:01:49,795 You're not getting any of my blood. 988 01:01:51,174 --> 01:01:52,163 Hey! 989 01:01:53,810 --> 01:01:55,038 Go away. 990 01:01:55,111 --> 01:01:57,602 Come on, open up. I'm not going to hurt you. 991 01:02:03,720 --> 01:02:05,483 Thank you. 992 01:02:08,191 --> 01:02:10,022 That's far enough, Count Dracula. 993 01:02:10,093 --> 01:02:12,323 What... Ralph, will you cut it out? 994 01:02:12,395 --> 01:02:14,022 I had to tell somebody. 995 01:02:14,097 --> 01:02:15,689 Why did it have to be me? 996 01:02:15,765 --> 01:02:17,960 'Cause you're my best friend. I need you. 997 01:02:18,034 --> 01:02:20,264 So I can lure young virgins 998 01:02:20,336 --> 01:02:22,634 back to your lair for a midnight snack? 999 01:02:22,705 --> 01:02:23,797 Not me, pal. 1000 01:02:23,873 --> 01:02:25,864 Don't be a jerk. 1001 01:02:25,942 --> 01:02:28,274 This is too much, man. 1002 01:02:28,344 --> 01:02:29,606 Ralph, I'm still the same person. 1003 01:02:29,679 --> 01:02:31,476 I'm not some monster. 1004 01:02:31,547 --> 01:02:33,640 Okay, let me think. 1005 01:02:37,520 --> 01:02:41,081 Okay, look, we're in this thing together, all right? 1006 01:02:41,157 --> 01:02:43,489 My lips are sealed. 1007 01:02:43,559 --> 01:02:45,925 Just make sure yours stay that way, too. 1008 01:02:45,995 --> 01:02:48,088 I don't want to wake up a few pints low. 1009 01:02:48,164 --> 01:02:50,029 Great. 1010 01:02:52,235 --> 01:02:53,896 So now what do we do? 1011 01:02:53,970 --> 01:02:55,301 I don't know. 1012 01:03:06,349 --> 01:03:07,782 What are we doing here? 1013 01:03:07,850 --> 01:03:10,512 Hey, look, if vampires really have secret powers over women, 1014 01:03:10,586 --> 01:03:11,985 you can't hold out on your best friend. 1015 01:03:12,054 --> 01:03:13,419 Look at these girls. 1016 01:03:13,489 --> 01:03:15,218 Ralph, I haven't even read this yet. 1017 01:03:15,291 --> 01:03:16,883 You'll do fine. Just wing it. 1018 01:03:16,959 --> 01:03:18,824 Now look, I'm not choosy, okay? 1019 01:03:18,895 --> 01:03:20,089 Tall blonde, skinny brunette... 1020 01:03:20,163 --> 01:03:21,221 I'll take anything. 1021 01:03:24,400 --> 01:03:25,992 Almost anything. 1022 01:03:26,068 --> 01:03:28,002 Come on. Let's go over here. 1023 01:03:29,338 --> 01:03:31,101 - That girl. - Like her? 1024 01:03:31,174 --> 01:03:33,108 Yeah. Go to it Count Capello. 1025 01:03:33,176 --> 01:03:34,803 Do your thing. 1026 01:03:39,448 --> 01:03:41,780 - What a hunk. - Him? 1027 01:03:41,851 --> 01:03:43,819 That face. 1028 01:03:43,886 --> 01:03:45,911 That body. 1029 01:03:45,988 --> 01:03:49,651 Now he's a walking sex machine. 1030 01:03:55,097 --> 01:03:56,792 Missed by that much. 1031 01:04:00,236 --> 01:04:03,797 My God, it's an entire satanic cult! 1032 01:04:03,873 --> 01:04:05,067 Grimsdyke, you take the back. 1033 01:04:05,141 --> 01:04:06,301 Be careful. 1034 01:04:19,188 --> 01:04:20,883 Blonde at the bar. 1035 01:04:20,957 --> 01:04:22,857 Now nothing fancy, okay? 1036 01:04:22,925 --> 01:04:24,187 A simple love slave will do. 1037 01:04:24,260 --> 01:04:26,285 Love slave. 1038 01:04:27,663 --> 01:04:30,632 One love slave to go. 1039 01:04:32,602 --> 01:04:33,830 Hey, nice glasses. 1040 01:04:33,903 --> 01:04:35,734 Look, is it okay if we go to your place? 1041 01:04:35,805 --> 01:04:38,672 My parents wouldn't understand all the screaming and moaning 1042 01:04:38,741 --> 01:04:40,299 coming from my bedroom. 1043 01:04:43,613 --> 01:04:46,548 - Well... - Satisfied? 1044 01:04:48,050 --> 01:04:49,039 Her. 1045 01:04:50,486 --> 01:04:53,046 All right. If I blow it, you're on your own. 1046 01:04:53,122 --> 01:04:54,817 - You understand? - Well, just nail her. 1047 01:05:11,607 --> 01:05:13,370 Make me your love slave. 1048 01:05:13,442 --> 01:05:14,534 Oh, my God! 1049 01:05:14,610 --> 01:05:16,805 Get the hell off of me, man. 1050 01:05:20,049 --> 01:05:22,108 Grimsdyke! 1051 01:05:22,184 --> 01:05:24,482 Professor, no! 1052 01:05:28,057 --> 01:05:29,251 Pull yourself together! 1053 01:05:29,325 --> 01:05:31,316 - Ralph! - Who is that guy, man? 1054 01:05:31,394 --> 01:05:32,793 Come on. Let's get out of here! 1055 01:05:32,862 --> 01:05:34,022 Did you get him? 1056 01:05:39,201 --> 01:05:40,463 Here, hold this. 1057 01:05:40,536 --> 01:05:41,969 I'll be right back. 1058 01:05:55,918 --> 01:05:57,078 Don't just sit there, Grimsdyke. 1059 01:05:57,153 --> 01:05:58,245 They're getting away. 1060 01:05:59,722 --> 01:06:01,690 Ralph, there's something I forgot to tell you. 1061 01:06:01,757 --> 01:06:02,883 Yeah? 1062 01:06:02,959 --> 01:06:04,358 Apparently there's some nutcase running around 1063 01:06:04,427 --> 01:06:06,418 trying to wipe vampires out of existence. 1064 01:06:06,495 --> 01:06:09,089 He's the guy that broke down the door and torched the Gardner place. 1065 01:06:09,165 --> 01:06:10,996 Don't worry. I won't let him get to you. 1066 01:06:11,067 --> 01:06:13,297 He's also the guy that drives the white van. 1067 01:06:13,369 --> 01:06:14,631 The guy that's been following you. 1068 01:06:14,704 --> 01:06:15,728 What are you saying? 1069 01:06:15,805 --> 01:06:17,170 That they think I'm a vampire? 1070 01:06:17,239 --> 01:06:18,729 They can't be that stupid. 1071 01:06:18,808 --> 01:06:20,173 If they kill me, I'm dust. 1072 01:06:20,242 --> 01:06:22,073 If they kill you, it's murder, right? 1073 01:06:22,144 --> 01:06:23,543 Yeah, great. 1074 01:06:23,612 --> 01:06:24,601 Thanks a lot. 1075 01:06:34,590 --> 01:06:37,115 We have to face the facts, honey. 1076 01:06:37,193 --> 01:06:38,387 Our son is gay. 1077 01:06:38,461 --> 01:06:42,090 How do you feel about that? 1078 01:06:42,164 --> 01:06:44,564 I really wanted grandchildren. 1079 01:07:04,420 --> 01:07:06,115 Oh, my God. There he is. 1080 01:07:06,188 --> 01:07:08,156 - She's here, stud. - What? 1081 01:07:08,224 --> 01:07:10,021 - Where? - Corner table. Don't look. 1082 01:07:10,092 --> 01:07:11,457 Don't look! 1083 01:07:11,527 --> 01:07:13,757 Don't look. 1084 01:07:16,866 --> 01:07:19,494 This is dumb. 1085 01:07:27,710 --> 01:07:28,699 Hi, Darla. 1086 01:07:28,778 --> 01:07:31,303 - You never give up, do you? - No. 1087 01:07:31,380 --> 01:07:32,847 Darla, l... 1088 01:07:32,915 --> 01:07:34,314 Look, you're important to me. 1089 01:07:34,383 --> 01:07:36,715 Just give me one more chance. 1090 01:07:36,786 --> 01:07:38,117 I don't know, Jeremy. 1091 01:07:38,187 --> 01:07:41,350 I like you, but you're so weird. 1092 01:07:41,424 --> 01:07:42,584 He'll freak out on you again. 1093 01:07:42,658 --> 01:07:45,183 I won't freak out. I promise. 1094 01:07:45,261 --> 01:07:47,388 Look, I had some problems before, okay? 1095 01:07:47,463 --> 01:07:49,693 But I'm fine now. 1096 01:07:49,765 --> 01:07:51,289 Don't make me beg. 1097 01:07:51,367 --> 01:07:54,564 - Make him beg. - I'm begging. 1098 01:07:55,971 --> 01:07:57,029 Shit. 1099 01:07:57,106 --> 01:07:59,631 Don't make any foolhardy attempt to run away. 1100 01:07:59,708 --> 01:08:01,767 This revolver is pointing at your navel. 1101 01:08:01,844 --> 01:08:03,573 It's loaded with silver bullets. 1102 01:08:03,646 --> 01:08:05,580 - Professor, there's a... - Be quiet. 1103 01:08:05,648 --> 01:08:08,913 You will slowly get up and walk out to that van parked in the street. 1104 01:08:08,984 --> 01:08:11,612 If you so much as bat an eyelid, I won't hesitate to use this. 1105 01:08:11,687 --> 01:08:14,850 - Is that clear? - Perfect. Very. 1106 01:08:14,924 --> 01:08:16,448 Let's go! 1107 01:08:18,727 --> 01:08:21,890 Okay, I'll give you one more chance. 1108 01:08:25,267 --> 01:08:27,735 That wasn't too weird, was it? 1109 01:08:27,803 --> 01:08:31,295 Look, I know you think I'm gonna go bananas any minute, but I'm not. 1110 01:08:32,808 --> 01:08:34,833 Where's Ralph? 1111 01:08:34,910 --> 01:08:37,572 He just left with a couple of freaks. 1112 01:08:37,646 --> 01:08:38,943 What? 1113 01:08:39,014 --> 01:08:41,642 That's them over there in that van. 1114 01:08:41,717 --> 01:08:43,344 Come on. 1115 01:08:44,520 --> 01:08:45,885 Wait, don't go. 1116 01:08:56,265 --> 01:08:57,459 Hurry! Get in. 1117 01:08:57,533 --> 01:08:59,398 Are we stealing this car? 1118 01:09:02,338 --> 01:09:03,396 Hey, look. 1119 01:09:03,472 --> 01:09:04,996 You guys are making a big mistake here. 1120 01:09:05,074 --> 01:09:06,803 I'm not a vampire. 1121 01:09:06,876 --> 01:09:09,106 I hate the taste of blood. I hate the sight of blood. 1122 01:09:09,178 --> 01:09:12,113 Professor, maybe he's telling the truth. 1123 01:09:12,181 --> 01:09:13,443 Lies, all lies. 1124 01:09:13,516 --> 01:09:14,505 Don't listen, Grimsdyke. 1125 01:09:14,583 --> 01:09:17,416 These bastards will say anything to protect their black hearts. 1126 01:09:17,486 --> 01:09:18,885 You promised you wouldn't freak out! 1127 01:09:18,954 --> 01:09:20,353 You know that? You promised! 1128 01:09:20,422 --> 01:09:22,822 I'm sorry. Darla, my best friend's about to be murdered. 1129 01:09:22,892 --> 01:09:25,019 Murdered? By whom? 1130 01:09:25,094 --> 01:09:26,288 It's a long story. 1131 01:09:26,362 --> 01:09:27,761 It's really me they should be after. 1132 01:09:27,830 --> 01:09:29,991 What are you talking about? 1133 01:09:30,065 --> 01:09:31,930 Professor McCarthy... he's a maniac. 1134 01:09:32,001 --> 01:09:33,525 He thinks Ralph's a vampire. 1135 01:09:35,171 --> 01:09:36,195 That's crazy. 1136 01:09:36,272 --> 01:09:37,637 Of course, it's crazy. 1137 01:09:37,706 --> 01:09:40,334 Ralph's not the vampire. 1138 01:09:40,409 --> 01:09:41,876 I'm the vampire. 1139 01:09:45,381 --> 01:09:46,507 Oh, my God. 1140 01:09:46,582 --> 01:09:48,140 There they are. 1141 01:09:53,522 --> 01:09:57,288 Professor, somebody's following us. 1142 01:09:57,359 --> 01:09:59,020 That's right, pal. 1143 01:09:59,094 --> 01:10:02,791 The FBI, the CIA, the National Guard! 1144 01:10:02,865 --> 01:10:04,264 And when all this over, 1145 01:10:04,333 --> 01:10:06,392 my dad is going to kick your ass! 1146 01:10:11,574 --> 01:10:13,974 Evasive action, Grimsdyke. 1147 01:10:14,043 --> 01:10:15,635 Yes, Professor. 1148 01:10:24,587 --> 01:10:25,713 I'm not crazy, okay? 1149 01:10:25,788 --> 01:10:27,619 Whatever you're thinking, please believe me. 1150 01:10:27,690 --> 01:10:28,782 I need your help. 1151 01:10:28,857 --> 01:10:32,793 Modoc told me someone that really cares will never let you down. 1152 01:10:32,861 --> 01:10:34,260 Modoc? 1153 01:10:35,864 --> 01:10:38,890 He's... He's my vampire advisor. 1154 01:10:46,642 --> 01:10:48,337 You're gonna kill us! 1155 01:10:52,514 --> 01:10:55,005 Darla, remember what we said about being different? 1156 01:10:55,084 --> 01:10:56,278 Different, yes. 1157 01:10:56,352 --> 01:10:58,411 Like being taller or skinnier or wearing braces. 1158 01:10:58,487 --> 01:11:00,785 Or maybe even being just a little bit weird. 1159 01:11:00,856 --> 01:11:03,051 But not being a vampire. 1160 01:11:09,231 --> 01:11:11,859 Cops! All right! Hang on, Ralph. 1161 01:11:11,934 --> 01:11:14,300 BMW, license plate "NITEMAN." 1162 01:11:14,370 --> 01:11:15,632 Westbound on Allen Parkway. 1163 01:11:15,704 --> 01:11:17,569 32 X-ray, request assist. 1164 01:11:17,640 --> 01:11:20,006 Roger. All units in vicinity of Allen Parkway 1165 01:11:20,075 --> 01:11:21,702 roll to assist 32 X-ray. 1166 01:11:21,777 --> 01:11:23,574 Pursuit of a blue BMW, westbound... 1167 01:11:27,683 --> 01:11:28,741 Oh, my God! 1168 01:11:37,693 --> 01:11:38,751 - You okay? - Stop! 1169 01:11:47,036 --> 01:11:48,469 Hang on, Darla. 1170 01:11:51,840 --> 01:11:53,467 Shit! 1171 01:12:01,083 --> 01:12:02,482 Good work, Grimsdyke. 1172 01:12:02,551 --> 01:12:05,782 It looks like the cavalry's been cut off at the pass. 1173 01:12:07,189 --> 01:12:08,622 Freeze! 1174 01:12:19,335 --> 01:12:20,563 You kids all right? 1175 01:12:20,636 --> 01:12:21,933 Yeah, I think so. 1176 01:12:22,004 --> 01:12:23,403 We have to stop the white van. 1177 01:12:23,472 --> 01:12:24,996 They're gonna kill Ralph. 1178 01:12:25,074 --> 01:12:26,974 Take it easy, kid. You're in shock. 1179 01:12:27,042 --> 01:12:28,873 They're gonna murder him. We have to stop it. 1180 01:12:28,944 --> 01:12:31,242 Relax, son. We'll get you an ambulance. 1181 01:12:31,313 --> 01:12:33,178 Listen to me. They're crazy. 1182 01:12:33,248 --> 01:12:34,476 They're vampire hunters. 1183 01:12:34,550 --> 01:12:36,040 They think my friend's a vampire. 1184 01:12:36,118 --> 01:12:38,552 They've kidnapped him and they're going to kill him. 1185 01:12:39,888 --> 01:12:43,289 Hey, Wally, looks like we've got another vampire hunter on our hands. 1186 01:12:43,359 --> 01:12:44,656 Another one? 1187 01:12:44,727 --> 01:12:46,251 See? 1188 01:12:46,328 --> 01:12:48,489 Damn. We better call in a Code V and get after 'em. 1189 01:12:48,564 --> 01:12:50,498 Come on, kids. Let's get to the car. 1190 01:12:50,566 --> 01:12:52,534 Come on. 1191 01:12:54,436 --> 01:12:55,664 Let's go! 1192 01:12:57,139 --> 01:12:58,697 Come on! 1193 01:12:58,774 --> 01:12:59,866 Hey. 1194 01:13:01,910 --> 01:13:03,138 You can't do this! 1195 01:13:03,212 --> 01:13:04,338 Yeah, right. 1196 01:13:04,413 --> 01:13:05,903 Sober up, kid. 1197 01:13:05,981 --> 01:13:07,812 Hey! 1198 01:13:11,053 --> 01:13:14,216 Ralph's gonna die and it's all my fault. 1199 01:13:14,289 --> 01:13:16,052 Maybe not. 1200 01:13:18,794 --> 01:13:21,024 I don't believe you're gonna do this. 1201 01:13:21,096 --> 01:13:23,087 You don't believe it? 1202 01:13:27,870 --> 01:13:29,303 Holy shit! 1203 01:13:40,315 --> 01:13:41,782 Come on, hurry up. 1204 01:13:44,920 --> 01:13:46,285 That was great! 1205 01:13:46,355 --> 01:13:47,822 I could be falling for you. 1206 01:13:47,890 --> 01:13:49,551 Don't push your luck. 1207 01:13:56,698 --> 01:13:58,029 This is One Adam-12. 1208 01:13:58,100 --> 01:14:01,001 I'd like to put out an APB on a white Ford van, 1209 01:14:01,069 --> 01:14:04,004 last seen heading north on Henderson Way. 1210 01:14:04,072 --> 01:14:06,734 And, Mom, if you're listening, 1211 01:14:06,809 --> 01:14:10,006 I'd like to tell you that this really isn't my fault. 1212 01:14:10,078 --> 01:14:12,308 I had to steal this police car in order to save Ralph. 1213 01:14:12,381 --> 01:14:13,746 Oh, my God! Let's go! 1214 01:14:13,816 --> 01:14:15,977 And, Mom, I'd like you to meet Darla Blake. 1215 01:14:16,051 --> 01:14:18,417 Hello, Mrs. Capello. 1216 01:14:18,487 --> 01:14:20,148 She's great, Mom. You'll love her. 1217 01:14:21,723 --> 01:14:23,884 Hurry up, Louis. Run! 1218 01:14:23,959 --> 01:14:25,984 Our son's in trouble! 1219 01:14:29,965 --> 01:14:31,557 Come on! Where are you, buddy? 1220 01:14:31,633 --> 01:14:33,100 I think they went that way. 1221 01:14:33,168 --> 01:14:35,432 - Where? - That way. 1222 01:14:37,739 --> 01:14:40,401 Stolen police unit traveling north on Highway 41. 1223 01:14:40,476 --> 01:14:41,943 Proceed with caution. 1224 01:14:42,010 --> 01:14:44,240 Perpetrator is presumed armed and dangerous. 1225 01:14:44,313 --> 01:14:47,043 Repeat, perp is presumed armed and dangerous. 1226 01:14:47,115 --> 01:14:48,275 That's our baby. 1227 01:14:49,852 --> 01:14:51,649 Turn there. 1228 01:15:02,865 --> 01:15:05,925 We'll release the creature's soul on sanctified ground. 1229 01:15:13,108 --> 01:15:14,837 Come on, you piece of junk! 1230 01:15:14,910 --> 01:15:15,899 Haul ass! 1231 01:15:15,978 --> 01:15:18,139 You heard him. Haul ass! 1232 01:15:20,048 --> 01:15:21,640 Hang on, Ralph. 1233 01:15:37,566 --> 01:15:39,500 Grimsdyke, will you stop that? 1234 01:15:40,936 --> 01:15:41,994 Come here. 1235 01:15:45,807 --> 01:15:48,173 - You do this one. - Me, Professor? 1236 01:15:48,243 --> 01:15:49,676 Yes, you. 1237 01:15:55,717 --> 01:15:58,652 Right. Now, you hit the stake right in the center. 1238 01:15:58,720 --> 01:16:01,883 Hard enough to drive the shaft through the ribcage, 1239 01:16:01,957 --> 01:16:04,482 into the chest cavity, piercing the heart. 1240 01:16:04,560 --> 01:16:05,618 Go on. 1241 01:16:09,197 --> 01:16:10,255 Go on. 1242 01:16:15,170 --> 01:16:16,967 I can't do it. 1243 01:16:17,039 --> 01:16:20,338 I've never hurt a human being in my life. 1244 01:16:21,343 --> 01:16:22,332 Wait! There it is. 1245 01:16:25,280 --> 01:16:27,874 You're a spineless creature, Grimsdyke. 1246 01:16:27,950 --> 01:16:30,009 Now I've got to do it myself. 1247 01:16:44,199 --> 01:16:47,396 May God have mercy on your soul. 1248 01:16:47,469 --> 01:16:49,061 Stop! 1249 01:16:50,772 --> 01:16:53,297 Hi. 1250 01:16:53,375 --> 01:16:54,967 I know what this must look like. 1251 01:16:55,043 --> 01:16:56,943 How about attempted murder? 1252 01:16:57,012 --> 01:16:58,604 No, you're mistaken. 1253 01:16:58,680 --> 01:17:00,671 We're just performing a little exorcism. 1254 01:17:00,749 --> 01:17:03,718 This is a vile, disgusting creature of the night. 1255 01:17:03,785 --> 01:17:05,753 A vampire. 1256 01:17:05,821 --> 01:17:07,186 We're the good guys. 1257 01:17:07,255 --> 01:17:10,554 You kill him and you'll fry for Murder One, pal, guaranteed. 1258 01:17:10,626 --> 01:17:12,116 No way. 1259 01:17:12,194 --> 01:17:13,661 There won't even be a corpse. 1260 01:17:13,729 --> 01:17:16,095 He'll crumble to dust before your very eyes. 1261 01:17:16,164 --> 01:17:18,155 - Watch. - Wait! Wait! Wait! 1262 01:17:18,233 --> 01:17:21,100 If he is a vampire, that's one thing. 1263 01:17:21,169 --> 01:17:23,797 If he isn't, an innocent guy is dead. 1264 01:17:23,872 --> 01:17:25,806 Yes, yes, yes. 1265 01:17:25,874 --> 01:17:27,637 That's a chance I'm prepared to take. 1266 01:17:27,709 --> 01:17:28,971 Forget it. 1267 01:17:29,044 --> 01:17:30,978 Let's see some proof. 1268 01:17:31,046 --> 01:17:33,446 What's in your little vampire hunters kit there? 1269 01:17:33,515 --> 01:17:35,244 You have a crucifix, right? 1270 01:17:42,024 --> 01:17:44,117 Maybe he's a Jewish vampire. 1271 01:17:44,192 --> 01:17:45,557 Right. 1272 01:17:45,627 --> 01:17:47,026 What else have you got? 1273 01:17:49,665 --> 01:17:51,997 String of garlic. 1274 01:17:54,703 --> 01:17:56,432 And you were gonna kill this guy? 1275 01:17:57,739 --> 01:17:59,297 Holy water, right? 1276 01:17:59,374 --> 01:18:00,398 Good idea. 1277 01:18:00,475 --> 01:18:02,204 Nothing worse than a dirty vampire. 1278 01:18:02,277 --> 01:18:03,676 And the stake. 1279 01:18:03,745 --> 01:18:07,146 If I kill him with a stake through the heart, he's definitely a vampire. 1280 01:18:07,215 --> 01:18:09,115 A stake through the heart would kill anything. 1281 01:18:09,184 --> 01:18:12,381 I'm afraid this evidence wouldn't be too persuasive 1282 01:18:12,454 --> 01:18:14,513 at your murder trial. 1283 01:18:14,589 --> 01:18:16,352 Grimsdyke, you've made a mistake. 1284 01:18:16,425 --> 01:18:17,722 Let him go. 1285 01:18:24,399 --> 01:18:26,094 A mistake? 1286 01:18:26,168 --> 01:18:27,897 That's all? 1287 01:18:27,969 --> 01:18:29,459 No apology? 1288 01:18:29,538 --> 01:18:31,335 No "I'm sorry, Ralph"? 1289 01:18:31,406 --> 01:18:33,135 "I beg your pardon, Ralph"? 1290 01:18:33,208 --> 01:18:35,938 "Sorry about that stake through your heart, Ralph"! 1291 01:18:37,846 --> 01:18:40,542 You sly little bloodsucker, you. 1292 01:18:52,160 --> 01:18:54,094 - Come on! - The car! 1293 01:18:56,031 --> 01:18:57,794 Ralph, the car... 1294 01:19:05,640 --> 01:19:08,268 Ralph, wait! 1295 01:19:08,343 --> 01:19:10,140 The car is over there. 1296 01:19:10,212 --> 01:19:11,679 No problem. Follow me. 1297 01:19:11,747 --> 01:19:14,079 Right. 1298 01:19:14,149 --> 01:19:15,207 Come on! 1299 01:19:15,283 --> 01:19:17,183 Freeze! 1300 01:19:17,252 --> 01:19:19,117 No need to remind you that silver bullets 1301 01:19:19,187 --> 01:19:21,553 serve the same purpose as a stake through the heart. 1302 01:19:21,623 --> 01:19:23,147 Professor... 1303 01:19:24,793 --> 01:19:26,522 Okay. 1304 01:19:26,595 --> 01:19:27,926 You have me. 1305 01:19:27,996 --> 01:19:29,554 Let them go. 1306 01:19:29,631 --> 01:19:31,861 They're only innocent bystanders. 1307 01:19:33,201 --> 01:19:36,432 Your heroic plea has been noted and rejected. 1308 01:19:36,505 --> 01:19:38,234 Do I really think I'll let you kill me? 1309 01:19:38,306 --> 01:19:39,933 My friends? 1310 01:19:40,008 --> 01:19:41,873 I don't see how you can prevent it. 1311 01:19:44,045 --> 01:19:47,173 You forget, Professor, I'm a vampire. 1312 01:19:47,249 --> 01:19:51,777 That has certain advantages. 1313 01:19:51,853 --> 01:19:54,913 You've abandoned your precious tools, Professor. 1314 01:19:54,990 --> 01:19:58,187 You have no crucifix, no garlic, no holy water. 1315 01:19:58,260 --> 01:19:59,693 Grimsdyke, shoot him! 1316 01:20:00,695 --> 01:20:02,094 I can't! 1317 01:20:02,164 --> 01:20:05,361 Luckily for you, I don't kill people. 1318 01:20:05,433 --> 01:20:08,732 Aren't you gonna drain my blood? 1319 01:20:08,804 --> 01:20:10,795 You sound disappointed. 1320 01:20:10,872 --> 01:20:13,363 No, just surprised. 1321 01:20:13,441 --> 01:20:15,966 Pleasantly surprised. 1322 01:20:19,214 --> 01:20:21,341 Didn't you hear me? 1323 01:20:21,416 --> 01:20:23,281 I'm letting you go. 1324 01:20:23,351 --> 01:20:25,581 I'll never stop coming after you, never! 1325 01:20:25,654 --> 01:20:28,521 Why? What do I have to do, kill you? 1326 01:20:28,590 --> 01:20:30,285 Rip your heart out? 1327 01:20:30,358 --> 01:20:32,087 Do it, Jeremy. 1328 01:20:32,160 --> 01:20:34,185 Let's share a toast with his blood. 1329 01:20:34,262 --> 01:20:35,991 Nora. 1330 01:20:36,064 --> 01:20:37,929 You've returned from the grave. 1331 01:20:37,999 --> 01:20:40,365 Of course. I'm a vampire. 1332 01:20:40,435 --> 01:20:42,027 Who's she? 1333 01:20:42,103 --> 01:20:44,571 Join me, Jeremy, 1334 01:20:44,639 --> 01:20:46,630 in a taste of immorality. 1335 01:20:46,708 --> 01:20:49,108 Starting with the professor's blood. 1336 01:20:49,177 --> 01:20:50,303 Well, surely you wouldn't... 1337 01:20:50,378 --> 01:20:51,675 You were eager enough to kill me. 1338 01:20:51,746 --> 01:20:53,270 That was different. 1339 01:20:53,348 --> 01:20:54,781 Go, Professor. 1340 01:20:54,850 --> 01:20:58,183 You see we're not all the insidious creatures you'd like to believe. 1341 01:20:58,253 --> 01:21:00,778 All we want is a chance to live in peace 1342 01:21:00,856 --> 01:21:03,950 without worrying about someone trying to ram a stake through our hearts. 1343 01:21:06,228 --> 01:21:07,752 Bravo, my boy. Bravo. 1344 01:21:10,198 --> 01:21:13,895 I've waited a long time to get you into my sights, old man. 1345 01:21:16,071 --> 01:21:19,131 My dear professor, why does it have to be this way? 1346 01:21:19,207 --> 01:21:21,641 When will you understand that I'm not your enemy? 1347 01:21:25,881 --> 01:21:28,509 - Grimsdyke, where'd you get these bullets? - But, Professor... 1348 01:21:28,583 --> 01:21:31,381 Now I'm gonna have to rip him apart with my bare hands. 1349 01:21:31,453 --> 01:21:32,477 As you wish. 1350 01:21:32,554 --> 01:21:35,114 But first, allow me to introduce some friends. 1351 01:21:46,534 --> 01:21:47,694 This is getting interesting. 1352 01:21:47,769 --> 01:21:50,260 Oh, no. Not that. 1353 01:21:50,338 --> 01:21:53,330 Grimsdyke, what are they gonna do to me? 1354 01:21:53,408 --> 01:21:54,875 Oh, my goodness. 1355 01:21:54,943 --> 01:21:56,706 Grimsdyke, don't let them take me away. 1356 01:21:56,778 --> 01:21:57,802 Grimsdyke! 1357 01:21:57,879 --> 01:21:59,278 Don't let them take me away. 1358 01:21:59,347 --> 01:22:00,871 Grimsdyke, help me! 1359 01:22:04,252 --> 01:22:07,449 What'll happen to him? 1360 01:22:07,522 --> 01:22:10,685 What better way to vanquish an enemy than to make him an ally? 1361 01:22:10,759 --> 01:22:13,353 Help me! 1362 01:22:13,428 --> 01:22:15,453 Hey, are those chicks coming back or what? 1363 01:22:17,165 --> 01:22:19,156 Wait a minute. You were shot. 1364 01:22:19,234 --> 01:22:20,929 With silver bullets. 1365 01:22:21,002 --> 01:22:24,199 Jeremy, once again you're guilty of not reading your handbook. 1366 01:22:24,272 --> 01:22:26,172 Silver bullets are an effective means 1367 01:22:26,241 --> 01:22:30,371 of dispatching werewolves, not vampires. 1368 01:22:30,445 --> 01:22:32,606 I don't even want to get into werewolves. 1369 01:22:32,681 --> 01:22:34,444 Professor... 1370 01:22:36,217 --> 01:22:38,242 What have they done to you? 1371 01:22:38,320 --> 01:22:42,780 Well, this is an ironic turn of events, isn't it, Grimsdyke? 1372 01:22:42,857 --> 01:22:45,087 What's to become of you? 1373 01:22:45,160 --> 01:22:47,094 I don't know. 1374 01:22:47,162 --> 01:22:50,859 Maybe I'll run with the pack for a while, see what happens. 1375 01:22:50,932 --> 01:22:53,457 I feel 20 years younger. 1376 01:22:53,535 --> 01:22:54,559 Bye, Grimsdyke. 1377 01:23:04,512 --> 01:23:06,377 I'm afraid that's our signal. 1378 01:23:06,448 --> 01:23:08,040 You're welcome to join us, Jeremy. 1379 01:23:08,116 --> 01:23:11,017 You'd be among friends, with others like yourself. 1380 01:23:11,086 --> 01:23:12,144 Thanks, Modoc. 1381 01:23:12,220 --> 01:23:14,347 But I have school tomorrow. 1382 01:23:14,422 --> 01:23:17,585 Besides, I have a few friends right here. 1383 01:23:17,659 --> 01:23:19,684 Good-bye, Jeremy. 1384 01:23:19,761 --> 01:23:21,592 Good-bye, Modoc. 1385 01:23:23,298 --> 01:23:25,960 Okay, listen, next time you're in town, give me a call. 1386 01:23:26,034 --> 01:23:27,433 We'll go out for a drink. 1387 01:23:27,502 --> 01:23:28,833 Bloody Marys. 1388 01:23:32,507 --> 01:23:34,941 Come, children. Away! 1389 01:23:42,851 --> 01:23:45,615 This has been one hell of a night. 1390 01:23:54,662 --> 01:23:57,859 I've gotta read that book. 1391 01:24:34,669 --> 01:24:36,830 Look, Louis! There they are over there! 1392 01:24:36,905 --> 01:24:38,532 Look, honey! Turn around. 1393 01:24:50,652 --> 01:24:52,813 Jeremy? 1394 01:24:52,887 --> 01:24:54,684 Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. 1395 01:24:54,756 --> 01:24:56,087 Son. 1396 01:24:56,157 --> 01:24:58,057 Guess I've got some explaining to do, huh? 1397 01:24:58,126 --> 01:25:01,493 We know that you've been going through this change lately. 1398 01:25:01,563 --> 01:25:04,691 Wait, you knew? You knew all along? 1399 01:25:04,766 --> 01:25:06,290 We're not blind, Jeremy. 1400 01:25:06,367 --> 01:25:08,562 We know what's going on in the world. 1401 01:25:08,636 --> 01:25:11,036 We don't want to be part of your problem. 1402 01:25:11,106 --> 01:25:13,734 Just be happy with who you are. 1403 01:25:13,808 --> 01:25:15,742 Incredible. 1404 01:25:17,178 --> 01:25:20,739 Mom, Dad, this is Darla Blake. 1405 01:25:20,815 --> 01:25:22,783 She's my new girlfriend. 1406 01:25:24,352 --> 01:25:29,255 Well, we're very, very happy to meet you. 1407 01:25:32,660 --> 01:25:34,924 Unbelievable. 97305

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.