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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,922 --> 00:00:07,786 You know that manslaughter is the least serious murder charge? 2 00:00:08,159 --> 00:00:10,454 - You don't say. - Manslaughter. 3 00:00:10,528 --> 00:00:12,459 Literally, the slaughter of a man. 4 00:00:12,530 --> 00:00:14,291 - Sounds brutal, doesn't it? - Heinous. 5 00:00:14,365 --> 00:00:17,957 Yet it's the most socially acceptable form of murder. 6 00:00:18,202 --> 00:00:20,361 So you think we should change the name. 7 00:00:20,438 --> 00:00:25,066 Yes, I do. How about "inadvertent life-ending"? 8 00:00:25,843 --> 00:00:27,376 "Unintentional snuff-out." 9 00:00:27,445 --> 00:00:29,479 How about "I can't believe it's not murder"? 10 00:00:34,886 --> 00:00:39,013 Oh, boy, I was up till 4 in the morning watching that Omen trilogy. 11 00:00:39,090 --> 00:00:41,715 - That's good stuff. - The devil? Forget about it. 12 00:00:41,792 --> 00:00:43,587 Well, he was the devil's son, right? 13 00:00:43,661 --> 00:00:47,754 - I thought he was the devil's helper. - He's pretty scary for a helper. 14 00:00:49,033 --> 00:00:51,727 I can't keep doing this to myself. I'm exhausted. 15 00:00:51,802 --> 00:00:53,597 Can't you grab a nap at work? 16 00:00:53,671 --> 00:00:56,569 Not with that big glass window looking out onto the hall. 17 00:00:56,641 --> 00:00:58,231 And I love a good nap. 18 00:00:58,309 --> 00:01:00,969 Sometimes it's the only thing getting me out of bed. 19 00:01:01,045 --> 00:01:02,840 - I'll see you. - Bye. 20 00:01:02,914 --> 00:01:06,074 - So, what are you doing now? - Gonna take a stroll through the park. 21 00:01:06,150 --> 00:01:07,683 With a gentleman caller? 22 00:01:07,752 --> 00:01:10,184 Yes, his name is Hal. 23 00:01:10,254 --> 00:01:13,118 The walking date's good. You don't have to look at the person. 24 00:01:13,190 --> 00:01:15,349 Hey, it's the next best thing to being alone. 25 00:01:16,460 --> 00:01:17,788 - Hey, hi. - Hi. 26 00:01:17,862 --> 00:01:20,192 - Shower? - Oh, pool. 27 00:01:20,464 --> 00:01:22,225 I just swam 200 laps. 28 00:01:22,300 --> 00:01:23,890 You are kidding. 29 00:01:24,168 --> 00:01:27,760 Yeah, look at those babies, huh? They're prunes. 30 00:01:27,838 --> 00:01:29,929 You know, I saw Conrad going up to your place. 31 00:01:30,007 --> 00:01:33,270 Oh, yeah, that's right. Those new kitchen cabinets. How's that coming? 32 00:01:33,344 --> 00:01:35,878 Slow. I gotta hold this guy's hand on every decision. 33 00:01:35,947 --> 00:01:38,208 Hey, Kramer, listen. You've seen The Omen, right? 34 00:01:38,282 --> 00:01:40,577 What exactly was that kid? 35 00:01:40,651 --> 00:01:42,275 Oh, Damien? 36 00:01:42,353 --> 00:01:46,890 Nothing, just a mischievous, rambunctious kid. 37 00:01:49,226 --> 00:01:53,092 George, have you seen that American League directory? 38 00:01:53,164 --> 00:01:55,391 It's a big green book. 39 00:01:56,534 --> 00:01:59,865 - Right here. - Thanks, kiddo. 40 00:02:14,185 --> 00:02:16,344 You know Twinkies aren't cooked? 41 00:02:16,420 --> 00:02:18,511 It looks cooked. It's dark on the bottom. 42 00:02:18,589 --> 00:02:20,816 That's just the way it is. It's a substance. 43 00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:22,959 Well, I don't care. They're delicious. 44 00:02:23,027 --> 00:02:25,891 - You wanna sit down? - Oh, I don't sit on park benches. 45 00:02:25,963 --> 00:02:28,088 - They're very bad for the back. - Really? 46 00:02:28,165 --> 00:02:31,257 I threw my back out 15 years ago. Ever since, I've been careful. 47 00:02:31,335 --> 00:02:33,300 I buy my furniture at an ergonomic store. 48 00:02:33,371 --> 00:02:36,872 Oh, those places have the stupidest names. 49 00:02:36,941 --> 00:02:39,202 Like... Like Back in Business... 50 00:02:39,276 --> 00:02:41,936 or Good Vertebrations. 51 00:02:42,013 --> 00:02:44,809 Not this one. It's called the Lumbar Yard. 52 00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:52,550 Hey, Jerry. Jerry, are you okay with this hinge? 53 00:02:52,623 --> 00:02:54,588 - Yeah. - I can get you any kind you want. 54 00:02:54,658 --> 00:02:57,192 Four holes, two holes, bronze, no hinge at all. 55 00:02:57,261 --> 00:02:59,886 You know, why don't we just go with the one in your hand? 56 00:03:00,364 --> 00:03:02,523 - Well, these are different. - Drop one. 57 00:03:03,367 --> 00:03:05,458 Left. 58 00:03:08,572 --> 00:03:11,971 Jerry, look at my eyes. 59 00:03:12,043 --> 00:03:14,407 A little less beady today. 60 00:03:14,478 --> 00:03:16,512 Because I'm refreshed. 61 00:03:16,580 --> 00:03:19,547 I finally found a way to sleep in my office. 62 00:03:19,617 --> 00:03:21,241 Under the desk, huh? 63 00:03:21,318 --> 00:03:24,182 I lie on my back, I tuck in the chair, I'm invisible. 64 00:03:24,255 --> 00:03:25,686 Sounds like a cool fort. 65 00:03:26,490 --> 00:03:29,058 Hey, Jerry, do you want a flat edge on this molding... 66 00:03:29,126 --> 00:03:30,750 or do you want me to bevel it? 67 00:03:30,828 --> 00:03:34,159 - I'll tell you what I'd like to do with it. - Hey, Conrad, is it? 68 00:03:34,231 --> 00:03:36,891 Conrad, Connie or Con. Whatever you prefer. 69 00:03:37,334 --> 00:03:38,662 Let me ask you a question. 70 00:03:38,736 --> 00:03:41,828 Could you expand the space underneath a desk... 71 00:03:41,906 --> 00:03:44,099 you know, give it a little more headroom? 72 00:03:44,175 --> 00:03:46,243 George, he's kind of tied up here. 73 00:03:46,310 --> 00:03:48,207 What? It would have to be a night job. 74 00:03:48,279 --> 00:03:50,711 - You normally work after dinner? - There is no normal. 75 00:03:50,781 --> 00:03:53,213 Whatever Jerry wants. He wants me here late, I'm late. 76 00:03:53,284 --> 00:03:54,428 He wants me early, I'm early. 77 00:03:54,452 --> 00:03:57,680 You know, why don't you just work on George's project for a while. 78 00:03:57,755 --> 00:03:59,447 Whatever you want. 79 00:04:01,125 --> 00:04:03,250 So how was Wednesday in the park with Hal? 80 00:04:03,828 --> 00:04:07,091 It was okay. He's coming over later to watch a movie. 81 00:04:07,164 --> 00:04:09,755 Hey, listen, what's better for your back: 82 00:04:09,834 --> 00:04:13,392 The couch cushions or a folding chair? 83 00:04:13,471 --> 00:04:15,232 I don't know. 84 00:04:16,207 --> 00:04:19,299 Maybe we'll just stand and watch the TV. 85 00:04:20,945 --> 00:04:22,706 I gotta go. Somebody's at my door. 86 00:04:25,483 --> 00:04:28,074 - Yeah? - Delivery. 87 00:04:29,019 --> 00:04:30,484 - Elaine Benes? - Yeah. 88 00:04:30,554 --> 00:04:32,645 We're from the Lumbar Yard. Got your mattress. 89 00:04:33,257 --> 00:04:35,917 Mattress? I didn't order a mattress. 90 00:04:35,993 --> 00:04:37,924 Who sent this? 91 00:04:39,763 --> 00:04:42,297 "Hal Kitzmiller"? 92 00:04:44,969 --> 00:04:50,564 You think it might be possible to add a little shelf, like, for an alarm clock? 93 00:04:50,641 --> 00:04:52,299 What, about maybe that big? 94 00:04:52,376 --> 00:04:54,239 - I don't know, like this? - Like that? 95 00:04:54,311 --> 00:04:55,605 - Like that. - I can do that. 96 00:04:55,679 --> 00:04:57,246 Great. 97 00:04:58,082 --> 00:05:00,776 You know, this could sound crazy... 98 00:05:00,851 --> 00:05:04,682 but what do you think about adding a drawer for, like, a blanket? 99 00:05:04,889 --> 00:05:06,820 - Blanket or a quilt? - Blanket. 100 00:05:06,891 --> 00:05:08,652 - About that thick? - Maybe like this. 101 00:05:08,726 --> 00:05:09,918 - Like that? - Like that. 102 00:05:09,994 --> 00:05:12,562 - If that's what you want. - That's what I want. 103 00:05:13,564 --> 00:05:15,723 Hey, George, do you want this cup holder...? 104 00:05:15,799 --> 00:05:18,265 Want it mounted on the left, the right, the middle? 105 00:05:18,335 --> 00:05:20,198 Whatever. 106 00:05:28,212 --> 00:05:30,109 This is unbelievable. 107 00:05:30,181 --> 00:05:32,146 This is better than my bed at home. 108 00:05:32,216 --> 00:05:34,307 All right. It's been a long night. 109 00:05:34,385 --> 00:05:35,952 You go home and get some sleep. 110 00:05:36,020 --> 00:05:38,782 - If that's what you want. - That's what I want. 111 00:05:44,128 --> 00:05:47,425 - Morning, George. - Morning, Mr. Wilhelm. 112 00:05:56,106 --> 00:05:58,538 - I got pool problems, Jerry. - What happened? 113 00:05:58,609 --> 00:06:00,768 Well, I had been swimming for three hours... 114 00:06:00,844 --> 00:06:04,402 and I was in a real groove, so I decided to keep going. 115 00:06:04,481 --> 00:06:06,776 But at 10, they start the aquacise. 116 00:06:06,850 --> 00:06:09,885 Thirty-five geriatrics throwing elbows. 117 00:06:09,954 --> 00:06:14,491 It was like I was swimming through a flabby-armed spanking machine. 118 00:06:14,558 --> 00:06:18,219 - Well, how long did that last? - Half-hour. Then diving class started. 119 00:06:18,295 --> 00:06:20,659 Well, that got a little messy. 120 00:06:21,732 --> 00:06:23,891 I gotta find a new place to swim... 121 00:06:23,968 --> 00:06:26,161 because that pool can't hold me, Jerry. 122 00:06:26,804 --> 00:06:29,099 - How was the movie? - I cancelled. 123 00:06:29,173 --> 00:06:32,504 Hal sent a mattress to my apartment. 124 00:06:32,576 --> 00:06:34,871 - The nerve of that guy. - Why? 125 00:06:34,945 --> 00:06:36,842 He's got a back problem. 126 00:06:36,914 --> 00:06:39,676 So you think he was expecting a roll in the supportive hay? 127 00:06:40,084 --> 00:06:41,845 After one date. 128 00:06:41,919 --> 00:06:44,954 - What's that guy's last name again? - Kitzmiller. 129 00:06:45,222 --> 00:06:47,051 Oh, that's right. 130 00:06:48,259 --> 00:06:50,088 What are you gonna do with the mattress? 131 00:06:50,160 --> 00:06:51,522 I don't know, chuck it? 132 00:06:51,595 --> 00:06:53,390 Oh, wait, no, no, no. I'll take it. 133 00:06:53,464 --> 00:06:55,759 Yeah, come over. See if it'll fit in my bedroom. 134 00:06:55,833 --> 00:06:58,367 - Oh, all right. - Yeah, my old one sprung a leak. 135 00:06:58,435 --> 00:07:00,298 - You have a waterbed? - Sand. 136 00:07:00,371 --> 00:07:02,098 It's like sleeping on a beach. 137 00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:04,702 - Hey. - Hi, Con. 138 00:07:04,775 --> 00:07:06,399 Jerry, I'm sorry I'm late. 139 00:07:06,477 --> 00:07:08,772 George and I, we've been up all night long. 140 00:07:08,846 --> 00:07:11,278 I can make up the time to you any number of ways. 141 00:07:11,348 --> 00:07:14,542 How about this? Finish this thing up today. 142 00:07:14,618 --> 00:07:17,812 - Couple questions for you. - No, no more questions. 143 00:07:17,888 --> 00:07:21,048 Just figure it out for yourself and get it done. 144 00:07:21,125 --> 00:07:25,059 All right, Jerry, but I can figure it out by myself any way you want. 145 00:07:25,129 --> 00:07:28,494 Just do it. 146 00:07:32,002 --> 00:07:35,003 Costanza. Where's Costanza? 147 00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:37,432 Have you seen Costanza? 148 00:07:37,508 --> 00:07:38,836 I've seen him around. 149 00:07:38,909 --> 00:07:42,501 He was humming this song yesterday. I can't seem to get it out of my head. 150 00:07:42,579 --> 00:07:44,237 I gotta know the name of that. 151 00:07:44,315 --> 00:07:47,043 She's a heartbreaker A love-taker 152 00:07:47,117 --> 00:07:49,947 Brubaker run this prison like a man 153 00:07:50,020 --> 00:07:52,645 Something like that. Very catchy tune. Very, very catchy. 154 00:07:52,723 --> 00:07:55,587 Well, you know what? I'm gonna sit here and wait for that guy. 155 00:07:55,659 --> 00:07:57,556 What is this, People? 156 00:07:58,028 --> 00:08:00,596 "The Most Beautiful People" People. 157 00:08:00,664 --> 00:08:04,131 Connie Sellecca. Nothing wrong that, huh? 158 00:08:08,439 --> 00:08:10,507 Elaine, you're taking this the wrong way. 159 00:08:10,574 --> 00:08:11,936 That's not what I intended. 160 00:08:12,009 --> 00:08:14,339 Well, what did you intend, Hal? 161 00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:17,309 I just wanted you to have the comfort and support you deserve. 162 00:08:17,381 --> 00:08:20,109 That's why I had the mattress custom designed for you. 163 00:08:20,184 --> 00:08:21,774 Custom designed? 164 00:08:21,852 --> 00:08:25,251 They adjust the foam density and the spring tension to your body type. 165 00:08:25,322 --> 00:08:28,220 I estimated your height and weight: 5'8", about 110 pounds? 166 00:08:30,427 --> 00:08:35,123 Oh, that is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. 167 00:08:35,199 --> 00:08:37,961 - So you do like the mattress? - I love it. 168 00:08:38,035 --> 00:08:42,333 I'm glad I kept it. 169 00:08:44,675 --> 00:08:46,675 Over there, that's Brooklyn. 170 00:08:46,744 --> 00:08:48,243 That's where Spike Lee lives. 171 00:08:50,981 --> 00:08:54,608 Hey, there's a man swimming in the water. 172 00:08:57,388 --> 00:09:00,218 No, that's probably just a dead body, son. 173 00:09:00,290 --> 00:09:03,484 You see, when the mob kills someone, they throw the body in the river. 174 00:09:07,698 --> 00:09:09,060 Hey, Jerr. 175 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:10,928 - Hey, buddy. - Hey. 176 00:09:11,001 --> 00:09:13,069 Well, my swimming pool problems are solved. 177 00:09:13,137 --> 00:09:16,070 I just found myself miles and miles of open lanes. 178 00:09:16,140 --> 00:09:19,334 - What is that smell? - That's East River. 179 00:09:20,177 --> 00:09:22,177 - You're swimming in the East River? - Yeah. 180 00:09:22,246 --> 00:09:23,677 The most heavily-trafficked... 181 00:09:23,747 --> 00:09:26,441 overly-contaminated waterway on the Eastern Seaboard? 182 00:09:26,517 --> 00:09:29,450 Technically, Norfolk has more gross tonnage. 183 00:09:30,387 --> 00:09:32,352 How could you swim in that water? 184 00:09:32,423 --> 00:09:34,423 I saw a couple of other guys out there. 185 00:09:34,491 --> 00:09:36,491 - Swimming? - Well, floating. 186 00:09:36,560 --> 00:09:39,629 They weren't moving much, but they were out there. 187 00:10:01,318 --> 00:10:02,715 Hey, Kramer. It's Elaine. 188 00:10:02,786 --> 00:10:04,581 Thanks for bringing my mattress back... 189 00:10:04,655 --> 00:10:08,020 and I guess I'll just get my spare key from you whenever. 190 00:10:08,091 --> 00:10:10,056 All right. Bye. 191 00:10:13,630 --> 00:10:16,062 Oh, this is a good mattress. 192 00:10:24,274 --> 00:10:27,343 Where is this guy? I've been waiting for three and a half hours. 193 00:10:27,411 --> 00:10:30,139 Should I go? No way, Jack. 194 00:10:30,581 --> 00:10:32,774 I'm not humming it at the record store again. 195 00:10:32,850 --> 00:10:35,316 - Mr. Steinbrenner? - That's what they call me. 196 00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:38,613 - Your grandchildren are here. - Oh, well, send them in. 197 00:10:38,689 --> 00:10:41,087 - Send the tykes in. - Grandpa, Grandpa, Grandpa. 198 00:10:41,158 --> 00:10:42,850 Hey, you little kids. 199 00:10:42,926 --> 00:10:45,494 Who are you people? Come here. Come here. 200 00:10:45,562 --> 00:10:48,256 How about a ride on the Stein-pony express? Get up here. 201 00:10:48,332 --> 00:10:50,832 What's your name, shorty? Mel? Are you Mel? 202 00:10:54,004 --> 00:10:56,004 - Hello. - Jerry, Jerry. 203 00:10:56,073 --> 00:10:58,573 I'm trapped under my desk. Steinbrenner's in the room. 204 00:10:58,642 --> 00:11:01,267 - You gotta help me. - Who is this? 205 00:11:01,345 --> 00:11:03,845 - Jerry. - Hi. 206 00:11:03,914 --> 00:11:06,949 Go away. Bye-bye. Get away. 207 00:11:07,017 --> 00:11:11,713 - Hi, I'm Brian. - Beat it, Brian. Beat it. Beat it. 208 00:11:12,155 --> 00:11:13,950 Why don't you just have him paged? 209 00:11:14,024 --> 00:11:16,388 They'll see the extension's coming from my... 210 00:11:16,460 --> 00:11:19,552 Back off. Come on. 211 00:11:21,298 --> 00:11:22,626 Would you do something? 212 00:11:22,699 --> 00:11:24,198 Call in a bomb threat. 213 00:11:24,268 --> 00:11:26,734 A bomb threat? Why would I call in a bomb threat? 214 00:11:26,803 --> 00:11:28,700 Just call. 215 00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:32,535 - I think I should have some reason. - Jerry! 216 00:11:34,745 --> 00:11:37,814 You kids are up on all the new tunes. Tell me if this rings a bell: 217 00:11:37,881 --> 00:11:40,449 Heartbreaker Love-taker 218 00:11:40,517 --> 00:11:43,245 Shoemaker Won't you fix my shoes for free? 219 00:11:43,320 --> 00:11:45,217 Anything? Shorty? Girl? 220 00:11:45,289 --> 00:11:48,654 Mr. Steinbrenner, we received a call. There's a bomb in the building. 221 00:11:48,725 --> 00:11:50,383 - Thank God. - A bomb in the building? 222 00:11:50,460 --> 00:11:53,654 Oh, my God. Quick, everybody under the desk. 223 00:11:57,267 --> 00:11:59,335 Can you imagine what went through my mind... 224 00:11:59,403 --> 00:12:01,698 when I saw there wasn't room under that desk... 225 00:12:01,772 --> 00:12:03,339 for me and my babies? 226 00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:05,669 - I'm sorry, sir. - You know what I think? 227 00:12:06,076 --> 00:12:08,770 - I think you knew about that bomb. - What? 228 00:12:08,845 --> 00:12:10,537 You had a premonition about the bomb. 229 00:12:10,614 --> 00:12:12,841 You climbed under that desk because you have ESP. 230 00:12:12,916 --> 00:12:15,143 Quick, George, put a thought in my mind. 231 00:12:15,919 --> 00:12:19,011 Meatballs, huh? Unbelievable. You're a wonder, George. 232 00:12:20,757 --> 00:12:25,089 Anyway, this terrorist had a very specific demand. 233 00:12:25,162 --> 00:12:27,423 No more cheap adjustable hats for Hat Day. 234 00:12:27,497 --> 00:12:30,088 He wants fitted hats just like the players wear. 235 00:12:33,437 --> 00:12:36,131 - Jerry. Jerry. - Yeah. 236 00:12:38,275 --> 00:12:40,036 What the hell is this? 237 00:12:40,110 --> 00:12:42,542 - Where are you? - Over here. 238 00:12:42,613 --> 00:12:44,271 You can see right through here. 239 00:12:45,382 --> 00:12:48,747 What is this? It's like you're selling movie tickets back here. 240 00:12:48,819 --> 00:12:50,750 I think it's kind of cozy. 241 00:12:51,388 --> 00:12:55,322 All right. You are not gonna believe what Kramer did to my mattress. 242 00:12:55,392 --> 00:12:58,256 I can't... I can't talk to you like this. 243 00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:04,563 So Kramer completely funked up my mattress. 244 00:13:04,835 --> 00:13:06,596 Does it smell like the East River? 245 00:13:06,670 --> 00:13:09,739 Yes, it does. How did you know? 246 00:13:09,806 --> 00:13:12,568 Kramer's been swimming laps between the Queensboro Bridge... 247 00:13:12,643 --> 00:13:15,974 - and the Brooklyn Bridge. - Oh, great! 248 00:13:19,816 --> 00:13:23,249 Oh, man, I'm on the wrong floor again. 249 00:13:24,988 --> 00:13:26,521 Hey. 250 00:13:26,590 --> 00:13:29,454 Thanks for ruining my mattress. It reeks. 251 00:13:29,526 --> 00:13:32,595 Hey, you know what I think it is? I think it's that East River. 252 00:13:33,096 --> 00:13:34,959 I think it might be polluted. 253 00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:42,104 Well, you really did it to me this time, Seinfeld. 254 00:13:46,610 --> 00:13:48,837 What the hell happened here? 255 00:13:48,912 --> 00:13:50,479 - Hey. - Hey. 256 00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:54,283 - Look how obtrusive it is. - It is obtrusive, isn't it? 257 00:13:54,351 --> 00:13:56,976 - It's very obtrusive. - I don't think it's that bad. 258 00:13:57,054 --> 00:14:00,521 - Well, can I get a stool in here? - No, the stools go over there. 259 00:14:00,590 --> 00:14:03,784 No, no, no, that's no good. I'm leaving. 260 00:14:03,860 --> 00:14:07,521 Yeah, I'm with stinky. I'm going back to my place. 261 00:14:12,035 --> 00:14:16,469 Fitted Hat Day? That's what you asked Steinbrenner for? 262 00:14:16,540 --> 00:14:19,632 Hey, they're actually doing the fitted hats? Cool. 263 00:14:20,010 --> 00:14:24,638 Guess who he put in charge of Fitted Hat Day. Me. 264 00:14:24,715 --> 00:14:27,477 - Hey, look at you. - Yeah, look at me. 265 00:14:27,551 --> 00:14:32,111 Now, I gotta figure out the different head sizes of 59,000 different people. 266 00:14:32,189 --> 00:14:34,814 What if a pinhead shows up? I gotta be on top of that. 267 00:14:34,891 --> 00:14:37,585 No knockoffs. I want the ones like the real players wear. 268 00:14:38,261 --> 00:14:40,795 Forget the fitted hats! I'm not doing it! 269 00:14:40,864 --> 00:14:44,297 And you're gonna call Steinbrenner back and cancel the whole thing! 270 00:14:44,367 --> 00:14:47,959 - Could you at least get a hat for me? - Fine. What size? 271 00:14:48,038 --> 00:14:50,265 - Seven and five-eighths. - Seven and five-eighths! 272 00:14:50,340 --> 00:14:52,840 - Why are you shouting? - I don't know! It's this place. 273 00:14:52,909 --> 00:14:55,477 I'm very uncomfortable here. 274 00:14:57,514 --> 00:14:58,945 So you're liking the mattress? 275 00:14:59,015 --> 00:15:00,673 Oh, I'm loving it. 276 00:15:00,751 --> 00:15:02,682 You know, we should... 277 00:15:04,020 --> 00:15:05,382 get going. 278 00:15:06,089 --> 00:15:09,090 - What is that smell? - What smell? 279 00:15:10,961 --> 00:15:13,859 - I think it's the mattress. - Did something happen to it? 280 00:15:13,930 --> 00:15:18,592 No, no. Oh, you know what that is? 281 00:15:19,903 --> 00:15:24,804 I went clamming the other day and I forgot to hose off my boots. 282 00:15:24,875 --> 00:15:28,536 - Clamming? - Yeah, I clam and scallop. 283 00:15:28,612 --> 00:15:30,304 I clam and scallop. 284 00:15:34,084 --> 00:15:36,516 Yes, yes, come in. Come in. 285 00:15:36,586 --> 00:15:39,177 Sir, I just got a call from the terrorist. 286 00:15:39,256 --> 00:15:41,347 I told him to call here, if you have a moment. 287 00:15:41,424 --> 00:15:44,459 Costanza, let me ask you something. Is it "Fe-bru-ary" or "Feb-uary"? 288 00:15:44,528 --> 00:15:48,257 Because I prefer "uary," and what is this rule? 289 00:15:48,999 --> 00:15:51,693 Let me put that on speaker phone for you, sir. 290 00:15:52,202 --> 00:15:55,100 - Hello, bomber? - Yeah, this is the terrorist bomber. 291 00:15:55,172 --> 00:15:57,604 You know, Costanza is busting his hump on those hats. 292 00:15:57,674 --> 00:16:00,766 Yeah, you know, about those hats, I think maybe I changed my mind. 293 00:16:00,844 --> 00:16:02,878 You don't want them? They're gone. Goodbye. 294 00:16:02,946 --> 00:16:05,412 - Good thinking, sir. - Now, what do you want instead? 295 00:16:05,482 --> 00:16:07,345 - What? - Well, you're the terrorist. 296 00:16:07,417 --> 00:16:08,916 You gotta want something. 297 00:16:09,252 --> 00:16:11,479 It would be nice if you called ticket-holders... 298 00:16:11,555 --> 00:16:13,247 if a game is gonna be rained out. 299 00:16:13,323 --> 00:16:15,550 All right, George, you can handle that. 300 00:16:15,759 --> 00:16:17,087 What the hell are you doing? 301 00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:20,024 We have to stand tough. That's why I had to hang up the phone. 302 00:16:20,096 --> 00:16:22,164 When someone's unstable, don't stir the pot. 303 00:16:22,232 --> 00:16:25,096 Know what I'm gonna do? Run around the stadium, closing windows. 304 00:16:25,168 --> 00:16:26,496 That's what I'm doing, pal. 305 00:16:26,570 --> 00:16:29,867 And I'll tell you something else: I am very nervous! 306 00:16:30,874 --> 00:16:34,740 I liked that stuffed-crust pizza, cheese-in-crust pizza. 307 00:16:34,811 --> 00:16:37,175 - It's just more cheese. - Let me tell you something. 308 00:16:37,247 --> 00:16:40,544 It'll be years before they find another place to hide cheese on a pizza. 309 00:16:40,617 --> 00:16:41,945 - Kramer. - Oh, hey. 310 00:16:42,018 --> 00:16:44,109 Hi. Oh, this is Hal. 311 00:16:44,187 --> 00:16:45,515 Hal, Kramer. Kramer, Hal. 312 00:16:45,589 --> 00:16:47,418 Hal... 313 00:16:47,490 --> 00:16:48,614 Langerhans. 314 00:16:48,892 --> 00:16:51,051 - Kitzmiller. - Yeah, Kitzmiller. 315 00:16:51,127 --> 00:16:53,024 - That's right. - You taking a dip? 316 00:16:53,096 --> 00:16:56,632 - Oh, I'm dipping. - That smell? 317 00:16:56,700 --> 00:16:58,461 Well, listen I gotta get to the pier. 318 00:16:58,535 --> 00:17:01,069 Ferry traffic gets really bad around 4:30, but.... 319 00:17:01,137 --> 00:17:03,296 Look, I still got your key to your apartment... 320 00:17:03,373 --> 00:17:06,135 and I'll give it back to you as soon as I can. 321 00:17:06,476 --> 00:17:08,009 Baby. 322 00:17:45,916 --> 00:17:47,643 Lunch. 323 00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:52,955 - Kramer. - Hey. 324 00:17:53,423 --> 00:17:56,686 - Can I talk to you a minute? - Yeah, sure, sure. 325 00:17:57,661 --> 00:17:59,353 - Oh, boy. - Kitzmiller. 326 00:17:59,796 --> 00:18:01,796 That's it. 327 00:18:02,065 --> 00:18:06,864 - You and Elaine are pretty close. - Oh, we go back a ways. 328 00:18:06,937 --> 00:18:08,937 And you've.... 329 00:18:09,005 --> 00:18:10,970 How do I put this? 330 00:18:11,374 --> 00:18:14,466 - You've been in her bed. - That's right. 331 00:18:15,278 --> 00:18:16,709 But this isn't still going on? 332 00:18:16,780 --> 00:18:19,371 No, no, no, she put a stop to that. 333 00:18:20,784 --> 00:18:22,249 That's all I needed to know. 334 00:18:23,053 --> 00:18:25,485 So you actually swim in this thing? 335 00:18:25,555 --> 00:18:29,250 Oh, yeah. Exercises every muscle in the body. 336 00:18:29,326 --> 00:18:30,916 It's great for the back. 337 00:18:30,994 --> 00:18:33,255 Great for the back. Right. 338 00:18:33,330 --> 00:18:37,230 Four hours in this chop, and I'm a full inch taller. 339 00:18:40,337 --> 00:18:42,337 Giddyup. 340 00:18:44,841 --> 00:18:47,273 Heartbreaker Brubaker 341 00:18:47,510 --> 00:18:50,477 Hey, hey, George, I remember that tune. George? 342 00:18:50,547 --> 00:18:52,512 George? 343 00:18:52,582 --> 00:18:54,274 What's that ticking? 344 00:19:00,056 --> 00:19:02,716 Fire in the hole! 345 00:19:04,194 --> 00:19:08,025 I can't believe the Lumbar Yard wouldn't pick this up. 346 00:19:20,243 --> 00:19:21,867 Okay. 347 00:19:27,684 --> 00:19:30,514 - You want it back the way it was? - Yeah, that's right. 348 00:19:30,754 --> 00:19:32,651 You know, I don't get you, Seinfeld. 349 00:19:32,722 --> 00:19:35,416 You want something one day. The next day you don't like it. 350 00:19:35,492 --> 00:19:37,651 I mean, come on, man. Make a decision. 351 00:19:38,428 --> 00:19:40,325 One second. 352 00:19:41,798 --> 00:19:43,991 - Hello. - Jerry, you gotta help me. 353 00:19:44,067 --> 00:19:45,794 I threw my back out. 354 00:19:45,869 --> 00:19:47,231 So just lie down. 355 00:19:47,303 --> 00:19:50,099 I am lying down. 356 00:19:50,173 --> 00:19:55,006 I am trapped under a funky mattress. 357 00:19:55,245 --> 00:19:57,313 You gotta go get a doctor... 358 00:19:57,380 --> 00:20:02,315 or at least come over and roll this thing off of me. 359 00:20:02,852 --> 00:20:05,011 All right. I'll be right there. 360 00:20:05,989 --> 00:20:07,989 Conrad, I gotta go. 361 00:20:08,058 --> 00:20:10,558 Stay, go. Whatever. 362 00:20:12,729 --> 00:20:15,923 - Hey, Kramer. - What's going on? 363 00:20:15,999 --> 00:20:19,193 I told my chiropractor how swimming in the river made my back feel. 364 00:20:19,269 --> 00:20:21,200 He recommended it to all his patients. 365 00:20:23,506 --> 00:20:25,540 Step aside. 366 00:20:30,513 --> 00:20:33,173 He just sunk like a stone, didn't he? 367 00:20:37,987 --> 00:20:41,147 - Sir, I'm sure it's not a bomb. - Don't be so brave, George. 368 00:20:41,224 --> 00:20:43,315 You mess with them. They're messing with you. 369 00:20:43,393 --> 00:20:45,358 All right, boys, send it in. 370 00:20:49,032 --> 00:20:50,929 Wait. What's that thing straight ahead? 371 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:53,261 Is that's anything? Is that Mothra? 372 00:20:54,704 --> 00:20:57,238 Let's check the desk. That's where I heard the ticking. 373 00:20:57,307 --> 00:20:59,898 Search each of those drawers, starting with the top one. 374 00:21:07,417 --> 00:21:11,954 It's just empty calories and male curiosity, eh, Georgie? 375 00:21:12,021 --> 00:21:14,248 Looks like there's more compartments underneath. 376 00:21:14,324 --> 00:21:16,415 Compartments underneath? Probably where it is. 377 00:21:16,493 --> 00:21:18,652 Okay, boys, let it rip. 378 00:21:23,566 --> 00:21:25,998 I'll tell you what, starting tomorrow, no more desks. 379 00:21:26,069 --> 00:21:28,603 Just a Lucite table and four legs. 380 00:21:32,609 --> 00:21:36,577 Hey! Hey, watch where you're kicking! 381 00:21:37,480 --> 00:21:39,605 You people find your own river! 382 00:21:39,682 --> 00:21:41,647 - Jeez! - I'm so sor... 383 00:21:41,718 --> 00:21:43,649 - Kramer. - Elaine. 384 00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:46,516 Hi. I am loving this. 385 00:21:46,589 --> 00:21:48,486 Hey, I'll meet you at the coffee shop. 386 00:21:48,558 --> 00:21:50,592 - Yeah? - Yeah. 387 00:22:02,138 --> 00:22:04,263 Hey, Connie. Jerry around? 388 00:22:04,340 --> 00:22:06,704 No, and I prefer Conrad. 389 00:22:08,178 --> 00:22:09,939 So I heard what happened to the desk. 390 00:22:10,013 --> 00:22:13,276 There was something so reassuring about that cozy little space. 391 00:22:13,349 --> 00:22:16,816 Yeah, well, whatever. See you. 392 00:22:19,589 --> 00:22:21,247 Back to normal. 393 00:22:21,324 --> 00:22:23,984 Not bad for 4000 bucks. 394 00:22:36,105 --> 00:22:39,504 Can't believe I got the low-fat. 31017

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