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It's been called the most unpredictable
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general election in living memory.
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Let the people decide, but only the clever ones.
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You know Viktor Goraya. We've got to get them out.
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We've got to get him into a country that grants asylum.
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But to do that, he's got to cross the border.
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You mean illegally?
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We need the money. I'm the man who lost a million quid, remember?
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What are the five jobs? Celeste said you had five.
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Don't use her name, not here.
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This is an extraordinary result.
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They can come to me,
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and I will decide.
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This programme contains some strong language.
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Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
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CHEERING
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Happy New Year!
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Has everyone got a glass?
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Bethany, you do the honours.
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It's in your "sync devices."
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CHEERING Happy New Year!
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No more than that. Hush now.
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It is my honour to say congratulations,
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a very happy engagement to you both.
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Yeah, second time lucky, Dan.
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Sorry, everyone. Happy new Year.
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You wouldn't believe how busy the roads are.
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Hey, congratulations.
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I can't believe you had to work.
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Double pay. So, how are you? Is that the new flat?
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How is it?
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It's not a flat, it's a room in a house with 16 people.
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Yeah, but it's in one of those tall back streets in the centre
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of Madrid, so... I mean, it's handy.
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They are OK. They're mostly Somalis.
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The detention centres were full, so they pushed us out,
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but, you know, it's better, I think.
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And are they all right
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with two men getting married, Somalis?
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Well, if you think about it, Muriel, Somalia's a Muslim country,
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so obviously that's tricky.
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That was my point, wasn't it?
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Well, now I've told you, so...
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And it's greatly appreciated.
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All right, you two - ding-ding. Just pointing out a fact.
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Which I have absorbed, thank you. See what it's like?
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I go to work to get out of the house.
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The thing is, you lot,
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I've got a sort of announcement to make.
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They are never going to let Viktor back in the UK,
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so we thought, when he gets his residency here,
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well, it's obvious, really, I'll have to move out
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and become a Spanish citizen.
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Yes!
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I thought so. I said so.
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That's brilliant, good move.
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Yeah, but it takes about ten years for the whole process to happen.
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That's ages, though. I'll be 25.
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Trust me, it flies past. It'll be here before know it.
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Will you still be alive?
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Bethany! You can't say that.
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What kind of question is that?
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But you had that radiation.
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It's a very good question.
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I promise I will cling on for dear life to get a free drink
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out of my brother. Good luck to all of us.
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And here's to you beautiful Spaniards.
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Yeah. Danny and Vic.
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Danny and Vic!
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To us. To us.
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It's on the Costa Brava, this little town.
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And just outside, they've printed this village.
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This complete village - houses, squares - all 3D printed
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on these clifftops, overlooking the sea.
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That's my job, housing.
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I could do that.
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I could print whole towns, whole cities, right here in Spain.
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Costa del Danny.
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I never call you Danny.
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I quite like it now.
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I hated it when I was a kid, but...
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Danny.
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Vicky!
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LAUGHING: That's no good!
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No. Uh-uh? Uh-uh?
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Hola.
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Buenos tardes, Vicky.
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EXPLOSIONS AND SHOUTING
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Sounds like a party.
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NOISES CONTINUE
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GUNFIRE, SCREAMING
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GUNFIRE INCREASES IN VOLUME
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Spain's calling it the January Revolution,
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as the so-called People's Party, Nueva Esperanza, declares itself
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the new government.
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Link TV, news channels, now!
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The situation in Spain means a left-wing government
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is being replaced by a far-left government.
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What can we do about Spain?
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Well, I'm stuck in the middle of a hung parliament.
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There's nothing I can do.
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They're saying Nueva Esperanza has a policy of repatriation.
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Anyone without citizenship is sent home.
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I thought they were left-wing.
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You've got far-right, you've got far-left -
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eventually you meet in the middle.
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They won't let you into France. Where else can you go?
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Outbreaks of violence in Athens as the country withdraws
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from the eurozone, and the Grexit begins.
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Martial law has been declared as the government of Italy resigns.
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Hungary has been declared bankrupt.
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The whole world is on fire.
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How long have you got?
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About an hour.
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The United Nations has threatened to remove its headquarters
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from American soil.
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After the suspension of same-sex marriage,
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the Supreme Court has overturned Roe versus Wade.
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There she is! No justice!
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Go back, go back! Right, rewind. There she is. Oh, my God!
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I've been banned from America, banned for life.
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And the government does nothing. Exactly, that's what I keep saying.
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Ask the Home Office about Spain, they haven't got a policy.
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Nothing. It's been eight weeks now.
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Don't start with this again. Did you see today -
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they are not calling it a hung parliament any more.
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They're calling it the Parliament of Water.
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Just flows through your fingers - gone!
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It's our fault - we voted them in. Well, that's helpful.
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Yeah, but it's true, you know?
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It just proves that democracy was a very nice idea for a while,
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and now it's worn out.
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Well, there's always Vivienne Rook.
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No, stop it. Viv could smash the system.
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Tell you what's weird, though, do you remember years ago,
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we used to think the news was boring?
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Oh, my God, golden days.
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The news would come on and we'd just yawn.
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Now we hide. I have to hide my eyes, literally.
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It's like at school, when they tell you about the olden days,
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with Sun Kings and plays and people electing pigs.
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It's coming back, it's happening again.
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We were lucky for a bit, born in the '80s.
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We had, like, 30 years, the first 30 years of our lives.
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Couple of wars. Yeah, all right, but you and me, we had a nice time.
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Basically, we had a really nice time.
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Turns out we were born in a pause.
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MESSAGE ALERT
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Oh, you see, somebody heard me relaxing.
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Duty calls. I'm off.
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See you Friday, yeah?
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How many jobs have you got now?
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11.
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Here, I'll give you the hack thing.
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See you. Bye.
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OK, so take this. They are the new ones.
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They've got Mo Farah on.
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I don't need this, thank you very much. It's only Chinese.
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Take it, though. Save your money for the kids.
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You get paid tuppence at Glover's. Well, I might not be there for long.
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Why, what are you doing? You've been away.
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I've got plans.
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There she is - the beast. It cost £20,000.
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If you bought that from scratch, it'd be 50,000, 60, more.
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I've checked, and that's a really genuinely knock-down price.
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Yeah, how come?
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It's owned by Jonjo's brother and he's gone to jail,
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and now they need to sell it to raise cash for his kids.
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Went to jail for what?
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Well, he was selling fish and chips out of this side,
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and drugs out of that side, if you must know.
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Oh, it's a drug dealer's van.
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It's a bargain.
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I've done a business plan, which they approved.
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They liked it.
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And you can have a look. I'm not daft.
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I know are risks, and there are costs way beyond the van.
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We'll have to get it all kitted out for me,
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and I'll need kitchen space for prep and storage,
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but Jonjo says I can have his brother's for half price.
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How much, then, in total?
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Well, I can get a loan and a grant, and Jonjo says they'll
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knock off another 10%, but I still need 10,000.
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I haven't got that! I don't mean from you.
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Well, what are you telling me for? I mean from Gran.
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Oh.
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I just haven't asked her yet.
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Oh, she'll say yes. She'll do anything for you.
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I thought you were going to ask me. That's a relief.
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No, I'm asking you if I can ask Gran,
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because her money belongs to all of us, really.
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But I need it.
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Of course you can. Really? Yeah.
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I think it's brilliant.
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I mean, it's a lot of work.
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What about Stephen and Danny boy?
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Have you asked them yet? No, I wanted to ask you first.
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But you know what Dan will say. What?
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Can we give Viktor a job? Oh, stop it.
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Can we buy Viktor a truck?
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Can we give all the money to Viktor?
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You are so bad.
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I know, really.
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Honestly, you know.
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So, tell me, who's Jonjo?
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Because my brother, he's just thick.
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I used to slap him on the head
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when he was five years old and say, "Oi, thick boy!"
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He says me hitting him on the head made him thick.
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I said, "You would say that, because you're thick. QED."
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My sister, though, brilliant.
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You know those areas in London they've sealed off?
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Won't let commoners in, like Kensington?
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Yeah. She's got a pass. She's allowed in.
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Whoops! Get off! Sorry.
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SHE SHRIEKS Oh, my God! You're an arse.
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Get it off me!
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Now, that grill, it can reach temperatures of 300 Celsius,
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which is a bit unnecessary.
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Burgers would be carbonised.
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But handy if there is another Ice Age.
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We can all huddle in here and start a new civilisation.
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We've lowered the handles for you.
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No good news on the gearbox,
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which means you still need me to drive.
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That's OK, as long as I get free chips.
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You want to watch that drawer, it keeps sticking.
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Apart from that, I think it's about time I kissed you.
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No, I don't think so.
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For real? Why not?
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Jonjo, it's too soon, I think we should wait.
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OK.
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Have we waited long enough? No.
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Have we waited long enough? No.
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OK, we've waited long enough.
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HORN BEEPS
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Hello, here we are!
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Bravo!
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What do you think? Be honest, do you like it?
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Just say yes. Well I better had, it cost me enough.
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And you must be the man with designs on my granddaughter?
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That's me. And I stamped my designs all over her lovely bum.
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Nice to meet you, Mu. Come here.
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Roll up, folks, the Rosie Lyons Experience is now open.
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CHEERING Whoo!
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If you want burgers, we've got acorn burgers,
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membrane burgers, ersatz burgers, bulk burgers, non-burgers,
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no burgers, not burgers,
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burger substitutes and paper burgers.
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Nicer than it sounds. What do you think, Mu?
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You look like a traditional
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quarter pounder with cheese, am I right?
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I'll have a crocodile sandwich - and make it snappy.
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Mum used to say that. It's still funny.
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Telegram
@ckhunter
256
00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:15,000
It's never not funny.
257
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:17,800
He's all right, Jonjo, yeah?
258
00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:21,520
He's the sort of man who's happy when he finds a big crisp.
259
00:11:21,520 --> 00:11:24,240
Rosie's not daft, she kept an eye on him.
260
00:11:24,240 --> 00:11:26,240
He's good with the boys.
261
00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:29,040
So, I need to get Viktor out.
262
00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:31,640
OK, you mean out of Europe? Yes.
263
00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:32,880
And into the UK?
264
00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:35,280
Yeah. Illegally? Yeah.
265
00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:36,560
Do you want me to go?
266
00:11:36,560 --> 00:11:38,960
No, it's OK. But what do I do?
267
00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:41,600
I mean, it's safer now, because this Spanish revolution,
268
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:43,400
it's like any revolution, it's a mess,
269
00:11:43,400 --> 00:11:45,160
no-one knows what anyone's doing,
270
00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:47,520
but if they get organised, send him back home,
271
00:11:47,520 --> 00:11:50,680
well, it could be a death sentence.
272
00:11:50,680 --> 00:11:53,720
It's like that in the Ukraine, people just disappear.
273
00:11:53,720 --> 00:11:55,320
I can't believe I'm saying this
274
00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:57,360
sitting here in the garden, but it's a fact.
275
00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:59,640
He could be executed.
276
00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:01,160
So, what do you need?
277
00:12:01,160 --> 00:12:02,840
A fake passport.
278
00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:06,200
You know, really, I'll leave you to it.
279
00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:09,480
I didn't like to ask her to go.
280
00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:11,600
You think she's OK these days?
281
00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:13,200
She's living with Gran.
282
00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:18,920
So, I just thought - you know some dodgy people.
283
00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:20,280
Do I?
284
00:12:20,280 --> 00:12:23,360
Oh, come on, Edith, your mates - God knows what you get up to.
285
00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:26,480
Well, yeah, I suppose years ago, I could have taken you in a pub
286
00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:28,760
down Cheetham Hill, 300 quid, done.
287
00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:31,320
But these days, you need a breath scan -
288
00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:34,520
identification by breathing, I don't know anyone who does that.
289
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:36,160
Well, there must be away.
290
00:12:36,160 --> 00:12:38,760
Because we're not stupid, we're not poor, we're not lacking.
291
00:12:38,760 --> 00:12:40,360
I'm sorry, but we're clever.
292
00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:42,440
We could think of something, surely.
293
00:12:42,440 --> 00:12:45,480
I don't think refugees are refugees because they're thick.
294
00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:48,400
No, don't do that, I'm saying the system is stupid.
295
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:51,120
Well, do you know the people that designed Brexit?
296
00:12:51,120 --> 00:12:53,720
For God's sake, don't tell me we can't outthink them!
297
00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:54,960
OK.
298
00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:57,480
I suppose half your job is get ex-cons back into housing,
299
00:12:57,480 --> 00:12:58,920
if anyone knows anyone.
300
00:12:58,920 --> 00:13:02,480
I know, but that makes it worse. I can't ask at work.
301
00:13:02,480 --> 00:13:04,520
One wrong word and...
302
00:13:04,520 --> 00:13:06,440
I like this terrine.
303
00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:09,400
Yeah, Celeste made it.
304
00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:12,560
Even if you can get him into Britain,
305
00:13:12,560 --> 00:13:15,240
he'll never be a legal citizen.
306
00:13:15,240 --> 00:13:18,720
So? He'd be a criminal forever.
307
00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:21,120
It doesn't matter, does it?
308
00:13:21,120 --> 00:13:23,200
Just live our lives.
309
00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:24,840
No-one would know.
310
00:13:24,840 --> 00:13:26,960
How often did the police come to the door?
311
00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:29,560
Like, never, not for people like us. Never.
312
00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:30,960
And we could move.
313
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:33,680
So, no-one would even ask, he would just be my boyfriend.
314
00:13:33,680 --> 00:13:36,080
I'd earn the money and he could be safe.
315
00:13:36,080 --> 00:13:39,760
I mean, that's better than a death sentence, isn't it?
316
00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:42,440
I mean, for God's sake, a death sentence.
317
00:13:42,440 --> 00:13:44,040
It's...
318
00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,680
Hey, hey, hey!
319
00:13:45,680 --> 00:13:47,240
Careful, you two.
320
00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:49,280
It gets slippery. OK.
321
00:13:49,280 --> 00:13:51,880
Are we calling that a T-shirt, or are we calling that a dress?
322
00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:54,840
I don't think it matters.
323
00:13:57,600 --> 00:14:00,040
No, he looks beautiful.
324
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,480
So, what are you going to do?
325
00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:11,560
PHONE RINGS
326
00:14:11,560 --> 00:14:13,760
SENOR: Telephone call, Edith Lyons.
327
00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:16,080
Yeah. Telephone call... Shut up!
328
00:14:16,080 --> 00:14:17,600
..Edith Lyons. Ugh!
329
00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:20,840
Hey. Hello?
330
00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:22,320
This party is brilliant.
331
00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:24,480
Yeah, I know, I can hear it.
332
00:14:24,480 --> 00:14:26,040
Come and have a drink.
333
00:14:26,040 --> 00:14:27,800
I'm in me pants!
334
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:29,320
That won't affect Fran.
335
00:14:31,680 --> 00:14:34,160
Tell her I said happy birthday. Where are you now?
336
00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:35,600
I'm out the front.
337
00:14:37,640 --> 00:14:39,160
Oh... All right.
338
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:45,000
Hello!
339
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:46,240
Hello.
340
00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:49,120
Hey, can I ask though -
341
00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:51,920
what is it with you and Fran, really?
342
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:54,880
Nothing, nothing, just friends, just mates.
343
00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:56,720
Sort of. Now and then.
344
00:14:58,240 --> 00:15:02,600
But the thing is, she says she's going to Spain in October.
345
00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:05,560
They are taking that tour, songs and fables, the African thing.
346
00:15:05,560 --> 00:15:09,680
No, no, they're cancelled, the FCO has labelled Spain,
347
00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:12,840
"We advise against all but essential travel."
348
00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:14,840
You still go.
349
00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:16,560
I'm engaged.
350
00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:18,680
But she's sponsored by the British Council -
351
00:15:18,680 --> 00:15:20,080
if you are funded by the arts,
352
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:22,080
you can just drive into war zones, no-one cares.
353
00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:23,720
Fran once took sonnets to Syria,
354
00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:26,560
never mind food, have some sonnets, but no-one stopped her.
355
00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:27,800
Drove in, drove out.
356
00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:30,000
Yeah, Viktor helped her.
357
00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:34,240
With the tour, he introduced her to that couple,
358
00:15:34,240 --> 00:15:36,480
the ones who put on the festival.
359
00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:38,200
Well, then...
360
00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:41,640
She owes him.
361
00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:43,760
Pity she can't smuggle him out.
362
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:03,440
With the vote of no-confidence,
363
00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:06,360
the Parliament of Water has been dissolved.
364
00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:08,360
The date for the general election has been set
365
00:16:08,360 --> 00:16:11,000
for Thursday, the 21st of October.
366
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:14,600
But for the first time in history, voting is compulsory.
367
00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:17,920
Like Australia, every British citizen must vote,
368
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:20,720
or break the law. It's going to change everything.
369
00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:23,000
I was really looking forward to the campaign.
370
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:25,600
There's nothing I like more than a fair fight.
371
00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:29,000
But these deep fake videos are ruining the debate,
372
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:31,080
and they're threatening democracy.
373
00:16:31,080 --> 00:16:34,280
Deep fakes are videos in which a living person's face
374
00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:37,880
and voice are recreated in CGI to say anything
375
00:16:37,880 --> 00:16:39,360
the programmer wants.
376
00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:42,480
There is one obvious solution to all the foreigners in this country.
377
00:16:42,480 --> 00:16:43,720
That's not me.
378
00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:45,600
Arrest them, throw them out.
379
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:47,200
I didn't say that, I would never say that.
380
00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:48,440
And if they resist...
381
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:50,440
That face and that voice are completely fake!
382
00:16:50,440 --> 00:16:52,560
Ex-ex-execute them.
383
00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:55,280
Ask me what to do with the rich, and I say...
384
00:16:55,280 --> 00:16:56,800
That is literally not me.
385
00:16:56,800 --> 00:16:58,720
..take their homes, burn them down...
386
00:16:58,720 --> 00:17:00,120
It's a fake!
387
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:02,760
..and throw those bastards to the w-w-wolves.
388
00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:04,800
It CGI, it's a lie!
389
00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:07,040
So, you are saying these videos are fake?
390
00:17:07,040 --> 00:17:08,840
Oh, of course they're fake videos.
391
00:17:08,840 --> 00:17:11,040
Everyone can see they're not real.
392
00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:15,880
All the same, they really did say those things.
393
00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:17,640
Didn't they?
394
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:19,400
What do we do?
395
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:23,040
How do we make a stand? How do we stop it?
396
00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:34,880
Fran. I need a favour.
397
00:17:34,880 --> 00:17:37,320
Hi, yeah, a woman called Vita put me through.
398
00:17:37,320 --> 00:17:39,760
My name's Daniel Lyons, I'm coming to the bank tomorrow,
399
00:17:39,760 --> 00:17:43,040
I need to close my savings account ending 3032,
400
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:45,760
and my extra account ending in 5061.
401
00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:48,000
I need the money in cash and I need it in euros.
402
00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:51,120
Thank you very much.
403
00:17:51,120 --> 00:17:53,640
And with campaigning in the final week,
404
00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:56,520
it's fair to say that polls have no idea what will happen.
405
00:17:56,520 --> 00:17:59,920
Now that voting is compulsory, no-one can predict how the entire
406
00:17:59,920 --> 00:18:02,240
British population will vote en masse.
407
00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:04,360
Call!
408
00:18:04,360 --> 00:18:07,720
Family link, audio only.
409
00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:09,840
SENOR: Daniel calling. Senor, accept.
410
00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:11,840
Hiya, bit busy, what's up?
411
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:14,680
Hello there, Danny, how are you?
412
00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:16,320
I'm trying to work!
413
00:18:16,320 --> 00:18:18,480
Hi, Gran. I'm at the doctor's.
414
00:18:18,480 --> 00:18:20,680
Make it quick.
415
00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:22,680
BREATHLESSLY: Oh, good morning.
416
00:18:24,200 --> 00:18:26,280
Stephen, is that you? What are you doing?
417
00:18:26,280 --> 00:18:28,080
Parcel on board.
418
00:18:28,080 --> 00:18:29,720
Well, it sounds like you're doing something else.
419
00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:32,760
Sorry, Celeste, didn't mean to interrupt.
420
00:18:32,760 --> 00:18:34,960
No, Celeste's at home with me.
421
00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:38,080
Well, she better have a word with him then, the dirty dog.
422
00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:39,560
For God's sake!
423
00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:42,440
Just to say this man at work's moved his days about,
424
00:18:42,440 --> 00:18:46,120
so all of a sudden, I've got a holiday. I'm off to Spain.
425
00:18:46,120 --> 00:18:50,800
Gran, I won't be around on Sunday, OK? I'm sorry about that.
426
00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:53,720
Cast your vote for Thursday, it's the law.
427
00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:55,600
Give Viktor our love.
428
00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:59,040
Warn him, I might fly over there myself one of these days.
429
00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:01,960
Fran is in Madrid, right now.
430
00:19:01,960 --> 00:19:06,720
I know. we're going to meet up.
431
00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:08,360
Should be nice.
432
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:12,320
Fingers crossed.
433
00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:14,240
Edith Lyons? That's me.
434
00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:15,640
Good luck, Dan.
435
00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:17,440
I'll see you soon.
436
00:19:17,440 --> 00:19:21,360
PANTING: Have a...nice...time.
437
00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:24,080
I will. I'll see you soon.
438
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,520
Yeah, bye. Family link off.
439
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:41,160
So, Fran is, like, plan number one,
440
00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:45,880
but failing that, I've got 15,000 euros.
441
00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:48,960
Well, strictly speaking, 15,240 euros.
442
00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:51,440
We are going to buy our way out of here.
443
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:54,440
Even if I have to commandeer a yacht to get us across the Channel,
444
00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:57,000
we will do it. Please say yes.
445
00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:59,480
My God! I'm saying yes.
446
00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:02,440
If you leave Spain and you get stopped without your papers,
447
00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:04,560
you'll get sent back to Ukraine.
448
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:06,840
I know. I'm saying yes.
449
00:20:06,840 --> 00:20:09,560
All the yes, completely yes!
450
00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:13,200
I just never thought you'd, you know...
451
00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:16,440
What? Never thought I'd what?
452
00:20:16,440 --> 00:20:18,640
Well, you are always kind of boring.
453
00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:20,680
Oh, thank you!
454
00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:23,320
But I like the boring. I love it.
455
00:20:24,720 --> 00:20:26,680
And all the time...
456
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:29,680
..I kept your front door key.
457
00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:32,320
To get me home.
458
00:20:33,560 --> 00:20:35,400
Let's go have a boring life.
459
00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:48,320
PHONE RINGS
460
00:20:50,080 --> 00:20:52,640
OK, they said to keep one of these at all times
461
00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:54,960
under the shirt, because it's harder to steal.
462
00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:57,680
Wallet, keys, emergency cash.
463
00:20:57,680 --> 00:20:59,400
You've got 200 euros in there,
464
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:02,080
so if we get separated, you've got that.
465
00:21:02,080 --> 00:21:03,440
OK. OK?
466
00:21:10,360 --> 00:21:11,880
Oh, yeah. We've got to do this now,
467
00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:13,440
before the rest of the company get
468
00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:15,280
on board, because I haven't told anyone, OK?
469
00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:18,160
No-one knows about this. I'd lose my job. All right.
470
00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:20,960
Go as far back as you can and we'll surround you with bags.
471
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:23,160
Is it safe? Oh, now you ask?
472
00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:25,360
Well, I have to check. It's safe, it's OK.
473
00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:26,640
I can manage.
474
00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:28,440
Plenty of people do this.
475
00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:32,160
Now feel the wall, hide yourself behind the bags.
476
00:21:32,160 --> 00:21:34,400
And it's 500 quid for Jim.
477
00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:37,960
You said 200. Do you want to argue with him?
478
00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:40,720
What's that in euros?
479
00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:41,960
650.
480
00:21:52,400 --> 00:21:54,120
Right, turn your phone on silent.
481
00:21:54,120 --> 00:21:55,960
I have, it's done, it's good.
482
00:21:55,960 --> 00:21:57,640
Now hide yourself, OK?
483
00:22:05,120 --> 00:22:07,160
Hiya. You all right?
484
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:08,640
I found that restaurant.
485
00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:10,320
It was brilliant.
486
00:22:10,320 --> 00:22:12,800
This is Dan, he's a mate from Manchester.
487
00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:14,440
He's coming back with us.
488
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:17,200
I told him there's no free rides, he's got to pay his way.
489
00:22:17,200 --> 00:22:18,960
I'll buy you a drink on the ferry.
490
00:22:20,120 --> 00:22:22,800
You're lucky the Schengen Agreement's still in place -
491
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:24,480
by the skin of its teeth -
492
00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:27,120
so we can drive straight into France.
493
00:22:27,120 --> 00:22:30,240
And if they find him, it's nothing to do with me
494
00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:32,160
or the company.
495
00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:35,000
He's just a stranger who's climbed on board.
496
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,160
Have you got that? Yes.
497
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:40,440
And you can tell your bloody sister I will not help her ever again.
498
00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:42,960
I know. But we can do this, Fran.
499
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:44,960
People travel across the world to be safe.
500
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:47,960
We've just got to get to Dover, that's all.
501
00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:04,800
I'm off.
502
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:07,120
Tuesday means drug test day.
503
00:23:07,120 --> 00:23:08,920
I'll be back for dinner.
504
00:23:08,920 --> 00:23:10,960
What are you testing this time?
505
00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:13,120
Some epilepsy drug.
506
00:23:13,120 --> 00:23:14,960
300 quid, that's what matters.
507
00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:16,440
Bye, see you later.
508
00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:21,600
OK, so I haven't got long,
509
00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:24,720
because I've got one of those blood test things at 12 o'clock.
510
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:28,200
God, I know you've got your own key, but you could text.
511
00:23:30,280 --> 00:23:32,000
I haven't got long.
512
00:23:34,240 --> 00:23:36,000
Is that supposed to be sexy?
513
00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:37,520
Well, yes.
514
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:40,120
Here I am.
515
00:23:45,120 --> 00:23:48,000
OK, it's working.
516
00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:54,240
Morning, you lot.
517
00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:56,720
Right, no-one in the bathroom, thank you very much,
518
00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:58,000
it's all mine.
519
00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:01,120
And your Uncle Jonjo stayed over last night -
520
00:24:01,120 --> 00:24:04,120
say hello. Hi.
521
00:24:04,120 --> 00:24:07,400
Right, Lee, don't forget that thing for school.
522
00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:08,800
All right.
523
00:24:10,240 --> 00:24:11,720
Can I make myself a coffee?
524
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:13,520
Help yourself.
525
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:15,840
Do you want anything, anyone? No, we're fine.
526
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:26,200
OK, you two, I want you to go to Leslie down the hall
527
00:24:26,200 --> 00:24:30,040
and ask her what time the shuttle bus leaves.
528
00:24:30,040 --> 00:24:32,120
Oh, it leaves on the hour.
529
00:24:32,120 --> 00:24:35,960
I want you to go to Leslie and ask her, and take five minutes.
530
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:40,320
Split this with your brother.
531
00:24:40,320 --> 00:24:43,160
£2.50. Now go. Vamoose!
532
00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:51,320
You all right? Yeah.
533
00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:53,400
It's a nice little kitchen.
534
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:54,720
It's like this on board ship -
535
00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:56,560
we had the galley, same sort of layout.
536
00:24:56,560 --> 00:25:00,240
Rosie said you were like Greenpeace, weren't you? A bit more ramshackle, but, yeah.
537
00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:02,640
She said you went all over. Yeah.
538
00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:05,040
Atlantic, Pacific, the Bering Straits,
539
00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:08,040
we sailed up to the north of Greenland, saw the last of the ice disappear.
540
00:25:08,040 --> 00:25:09,680
It's terrible, that.
541
00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:12,800
It's funny, because volunteers would come on board and say, "Oh, I'm a vegan,"
542
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:16,200
but after three months of eating dried pulses, they'd be fishing with the best of us.
543
00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:17,560
I bet.
544
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:20,160
In the end, I could fillet a fish with three strokes.
545
00:25:20,160 --> 00:25:22,960
Head, gut, spine.
546
00:25:22,960 --> 00:25:25,000
One, two, three.
547
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:27,080
Became a dab hand with a knife.
548
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:31,920
Cos you're more than a fling, Jonjo.
549
00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:33,960
Looks like you're staying.
550
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:39,120
And it strikes me that when a man enters a family with two kids,
551
00:25:39,120 --> 00:25:43,000
a family with two little boys right at the heart of it,
552
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:46,160
then I'd better be on the alert.
553
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:47,640
You understand?
554
00:25:47,640 --> 00:25:49,040
Yeah.
555
00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:51,760
Because there are terrible men out there.
556
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,320
But I'm watching.
557
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:58,560
And believe me, Jonjo, I've done some shit.
558
00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:00,400
Have you got that?
559
00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:02,320
Honestly, I swear, it's all about Rosie.
560
00:26:02,320 --> 00:26:04,360
I think she's amazing.
561
00:26:04,360 --> 00:26:05,560
Good.
562
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:06,840
There's no side to me.
563
00:26:06,840 --> 00:26:08,840
My mother always says I've got no layers,
564
00:26:08,840 --> 00:26:10,880
and I think your sister's really, really lovely.
565
00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:14,000
Yeah.
566
00:26:14,000 --> 00:26:16,000
I think you do.
567
00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:17,760
All right.
568
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,160
I'm still watching.
569
00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:26,320
I don't like the sound of it.
570
00:26:26,320 --> 00:26:28,160
Are they safe, these drugs tests?
571
00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:31,560
300 quid, cash in hand.
572
00:26:33,360 --> 00:26:36,000
Ever since we left the EU, the medicines agency moved
573
00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:39,280
to France, so now we have to test all the drugs from scratch.
574
00:26:39,280 --> 00:26:41,520
It's a bonanza for people like me.
575
00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:44,200
Time's up.
576
00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:45,960
Duty calls.
577
00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:47,800
300 quid.
578
00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:57,400
If you could blow there.
579
00:26:58,840 --> 00:27:00,200
And there.
580
00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:03,640
Thank you.
581
00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:06,120
We'll be taking blood, so I'm legally required to ask,
582
00:27:06,120 --> 00:27:08,440
do you want to know your life expectancy?
583
00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:10,600
Um, no. No, thanks.
584
00:27:10,600 --> 00:27:13,200
Right. That should take about an hour.
585
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:14,920
I'll come back to keep an eye on you.
586
00:27:14,920 --> 00:27:16,320
Thanks.
587
00:27:44,600 --> 00:27:47,560
Lyons in five, he's had a reaction, we might need to flag him up.
588
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:50,120
Sure, I'll pull up his file. Thanks.
589
00:27:50,120 --> 00:27:52,880
Dr Scott said there's nothing to worry about.
590
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:55,040
It's a little bit of a side effect, that's all.
591
00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:56,560
Yeah, I can't stop...
592
00:27:56,560 --> 00:27:57,880
I keep...
593
00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:02,240
I'm looking left all the time, I can't stop turning my head left.
594
00:28:02,240 --> 00:28:04,680
You are mimicking symptoms of an epileptic seizure,
595
00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:06,160
but without the seizure itself.
596
00:28:06,160 --> 00:28:08,120
Give it a couple hours, it will pass.
597
00:28:08,120 --> 00:28:10,560
You came here on your bike, is that right?
598
00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:13,080
OK, I don't think that's safe to get you home.
599
00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:14,960
Have you got someone who can pick you up?
600
00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:18,840
I could try Elaine. I can't focus.
601
00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:21,560
Yeah, it's all right, I'll do it. Elaine Parris.
602
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:25,760
Oh, this is weird.
603
00:28:25,760 --> 00:28:27,520
Gran would kill me.
604
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:29,960
I'll go to Elaine, until it passes.
605
00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:31,360
Ohh...
606
00:28:31,360 --> 00:28:34,600
PHONE RINGING
607
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:37,160
Hi there, how did it go?
608
00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:39,600
I'm calling on behalf of Mr Stephen Lyons,
609
00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:41,280
he needs you to come and collect him.
610
00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:43,920
Lyons in five, nothing to worry about,
611
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:47,040
but he's taking transport home. OK, thanks for letting me know.
612
00:28:50,840 --> 00:28:53,720
SENOR: Phone call, Claverton Facility.
613
00:28:53,720 --> 00:28:56,040
Accept, thank you, Senor. Hello?
614
00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:59,000
Hello, I'm phoning on behalf of Mr Stephen Lyons.
615
00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:00,960
He needs someone to come and collect him.
616
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:07,240
Hi, my name's Celeste Bisme-Lyons.
617
00:29:07,240 --> 00:29:09,040
I'm here to get my husband, Stephen Lyons.
618
00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:20,320
Hey. Darling. Hello.
619
00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:21,680
It's nice to see you.
620
00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:24,560
It's Elaine. We met at that party thing?
621
00:29:24,560 --> 00:29:26,040
Yeah, I remember.
622
00:29:26,040 --> 00:29:29,880
I was just visiting and I just popped in,
623
00:29:29,880 --> 00:29:32,920
and it turns out he's not very well. The big lump.
624
00:29:32,920 --> 00:29:34,800
Like a bad reaction, they said.
625
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:36,920
Yeah, I can't stop turning my head left.
626
00:29:36,920 --> 00:29:39,520
I was just on my way into work.
627
00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:41,600
Well, good.
628
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:45,280
Thanks, Elaine, I can take him home now.
629
00:29:45,280 --> 00:29:46,520
OK.
630
00:29:47,920 --> 00:29:49,520
See you soon then, bye.
631
00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:51,040
Yeah, thanks.
632
00:29:55,120 --> 00:29:59,440
It's weird, I just keep turning my head.
633
00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:00,920
I know there's nothing,
634
00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:02,560
but I can't stop myself from looking.
635
00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:18,560
I think it's getting better though.
636
00:30:20,520 --> 00:30:22,960
Ruby! Are you home?
637
00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:26,240
I want you downstairs, now.
638
00:30:26,240 --> 00:30:28,280
I'm home!
639
00:30:28,280 --> 00:30:30,080
Ruby, I know you're up there.
640
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:31,920
I want you downstairs this very second.
641
00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:34,680
That's an order. So, what's wrong with him?
642
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:36,200
Ask him yourself.
643
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:37,760
I'm sorry, it's weird, it's my head.
644
00:30:37,760 --> 00:30:39,280
What do you mean, your head?
645
00:30:39,280 --> 00:30:41,720
What have they done to you this time?
646
00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:44,040
Senor, call Bethany at work.
647
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:45,560
Tag it urgent so she answers.
648
00:30:45,560 --> 00:30:47,120
What's that for?
649
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:49,320
I think we should tell them.
650
00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:51,000
I've only got a funny head.
651
00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:52,640
What is it? I'm busy.
652
00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:55,120
Your daft old dad's just got a funny head, that's all.
653
00:30:55,120 --> 00:30:56,440
Hello? Is it really urgent?
654
00:30:56,440 --> 00:30:58,640
I've only got two minutes for personal calls.
655
00:30:58,640 --> 00:31:00,360
No, it won't take long.
656
00:31:00,360 --> 00:31:03,560
Your dad wants to tell you something, girls.
657
00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:05,240
OK.
658
00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:11,600
I go to that clinic on Tuesdays, and I tried this drug...
659
00:31:11,600 --> 00:31:14,640
No, I don't mean that.
660
00:31:14,640 --> 00:31:17,800
I mean tell them about Elaine, Stephen.
661
00:31:19,880 --> 00:31:23,800
Tell them about the affair you're having with Elaine Parris.
662
00:31:23,800 --> 00:31:25,360
What on Earth do you mean?!
663
00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:26,880
And you can shut up.
664
00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:29,320
Senor, end the call.
665
00:31:32,680 --> 00:31:34,040
What's she talking about, Dad?
666
00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:36,480
SENOR: Phone call, Bethany Bisme-Lyons.
667
00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:37,880
Senor, accept.
668
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:41,120
Now, tell them.
669
00:31:41,120 --> 00:31:44,000
Tell your daughters, tell your gran,
670
00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:46,240
and let's tell your whole bloody family -
671
00:31:46,240 --> 00:31:48,480
you're always yap-yap-yapping away to them.
672
00:31:48,480 --> 00:31:51,520
Tell them all how you've been having an affair.
673
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:55,120
No, that sounds too classy, doesn't it?
674
00:31:56,600 --> 00:31:58,960
Tell them how you've been rutting and snorting
675
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:01,680
and fucking that greasy-haired little sack for weeks.
676
00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:03,160
For months.
677
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:04,440
For years.
678
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:09,520
I've got an idea. Let's ask her.
679
00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:12,760
Senor, call Elaine Parris.
680
00:32:12,760 --> 00:32:14,440
Calling Elaine Parris.
681
00:32:23,560 --> 00:32:25,480
THUDS
682
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:32,840
Get out as fast as you can! They're searching every vehicle.
683
00:32:32,840 --> 00:32:35,640
Come on, mate, we've had it!
684
00:32:35,640 --> 00:32:38,840
Got word down the line, they're stripping them bare, let's go. What will you do?
685
00:32:38,840 --> 00:32:40,560
Don't worry about us, there's always an option.
686
00:32:40,560 --> 00:32:42,240
We're heading to Calais.
687
00:32:42,240 --> 00:32:44,800
Oh, I think we've blown your cover.
688
00:32:44,800 --> 00:32:46,960
Never mind that, just go.
689
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:48,760
Can we walk? Is it far?
690
00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:51,080
Yeah, I'm just getting... Right, got it, come on.
691
00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:52,920
Thanks.
692
00:32:56,360 --> 00:32:59,960
It's OK, because I budgeted, 35 euros, cheap hotel,
693
00:32:59,960 --> 00:33:02,720
base of operations, get you that passport,
694
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:06,120
then the breath test, and get us back onto that ferry.
695
00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:22,920
You missed all the drama.
696
00:33:24,320 --> 00:33:26,600
14 missed calls.
697
00:33:26,600 --> 00:33:30,960
Turns out Stephen has been having an affair
698
00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:32,840
with a woman called Elaine.
699
00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:37,080
Phone call Rosie, thanks.
700
00:33:37,080 --> 00:33:41,160
I've met Elaine. She's a bit tough.
701
00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:43,800
There you are. So, what the hell?!
702
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:45,200
My God! where have you been?
703
00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:47,040
This is like the biggest day in history.
704
00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:48,840
Can you believe it? What's happening?
705
00:33:48,840 --> 00:33:51,480
How did it happen? Does everyone know?
706
00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:53,760
Celeste announced it like the town crier -
707
00:33:53,760 --> 00:33:56,840
even Gran knows, and the kids, Beth and Ruby, and everyone.
708
00:33:56,840 --> 00:33:59,160
The thing is, she was always out of his league, really.
709
00:33:59,160 --> 00:34:01,480
Who was, Celeste? Yeah, I mean, look at her.
710
00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:05,000
She's beautiful. Stephen's just Stephen.
711
00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:09,360
Oh, my God, I'm never turning my back on you two. You OK though?
712
00:34:09,360 --> 00:34:12,040
How are you? Are you with Viktor? Is he there?
713
00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:13,520
Yeah, we're good, we're fine.
714
00:34:13,520 --> 00:34:15,680
There's nothing to worry about, honestly.
715
00:34:15,680 --> 00:34:17,000
It's all under control.
716
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:19,520
Oh, my God, though!
717
00:34:19,520 --> 00:34:22,080
Stephen - I mean, Stephen?!
718
00:34:24,360 --> 00:34:27,800
You sit there, saying to my face it didn't mean anything.
719
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:29,680
But it didn't. Let me tell you how nice it is
720
00:34:29,680 --> 00:34:31,720
to have your whole life wrecked by something
721
00:34:31,720 --> 00:34:35,280
that didn't mean anything! Do you think that helps?
722
00:34:35,280 --> 00:34:37,760
No. I'm sorry.
723
00:34:37,760 --> 00:34:40,080
All of it, ruined!
724
00:34:40,080 --> 00:34:42,320
In some dirty little bedsit in Egerton Road.
725
00:34:43,880 --> 00:34:45,200
But how do you know?
726
00:34:45,200 --> 00:34:47,400
I looked her up, long time ago.
727
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:50,480
Elaine Parris, 120 Egerton Road. Simple as that.
728
00:34:50,480 --> 00:34:52,200
Because what else could I do?
729
00:34:52,200 --> 00:34:54,160
Stuck in this house with no money.
730
00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:57,640
So, I did the only thing I could do, I drove there.
731
00:34:57,640 --> 00:35:02,320
This was last year, Stephen, last year - this was September.
732
00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:04,760
I sat outside in the car, and I thought,
733
00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:06,440
"This is where he does it.
734
00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:09,680
"This is where he makes that noise and slops it into her."
735
00:35:09,680 --> 00:35:12,800
I'm sorry, Celeste, but I think that's actually a little bit weird.
736
00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:15,480
You can think whatever you like, because you can pack your bags
737
00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:17,680
right now and take your arse back to Egerton Road!
738
00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:19,320
But I'm not with Elaine. We're not...
739
00:35:19,320 --> 00:35:20,840
SHE SCOFFS
740
00:35:20,840 --> 00:35:23,080
Besides, I don't think you realise - I can't leave.
741
00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:25,480
This is my family's house.
742
00:35:25,480 --> 00:35:28,240
Hold on. If you don't mind.
743
00:35:28,240 --> 00:35:30,600
Excuse me, I think if you look at the deeds,
744
00:35:30,600 --> 00:35:32,320
this is still my house.
745
00:35:32,320 --> 00:35:35,040
I'm really, really sorry, but not now, Gran. Seriously.
746
00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:36,360
No, it's highly pertinent.
747
00:35:36,360 --> 00:35:39,400
We've got two young girls upstairs who have had more than enough
748
00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:40,680
trouble for one night.
749
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,720
And I agree with Celeste, get out.
750
00:35:48,040 --> 00:35:49,560
Thank you.
751
00:35:49,560 --> 00:35:53,000
I am so disappointed to discover
752
00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:56,920
that you are your father's son.
753
00:35:56,920 --> 00:35:59,480
Your mother would've been disgusted.
754
00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:03,440
Don't say that. She would've been disgusted.
755
00:36:04,440 --> 00:36:06,160
I am so sorry.
756
00:36:13,880 --> 00:36:15,600
Do what Granny says, then.
757
00:36:16,680 --> 00:36:18,000
Out.
758
00:36:37,200 --> 00:36:39,400
You're so stupid, Dad.
759
00:36:40,720 --> 00:36:42,240
I know.
760
00:36:43,840 --> 00:36:45,280
I'm sorry.
761
00:36:57,320 --> 00:36:58,840
What colour is she?
762
00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:02,600
Elaine? She's white.
763
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:05,240
Bye.
764
00:37:11,280 --> 00:37:13,920
You're not taking the car. I need it for the girls.
765
00:37:13,920 --> 00:37:15,280
You can bike.
766
00:37:49,960 --> 00:37:52,200
There is a man I met at Three Bridges,
767
00:37:52,200 --> 00:37:55,000
and he says for a passport and a breath test
768
00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:57,160
we need to find a woman called Elodie.
769
00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:00,160
All right.
770
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:19,760
Bonjour.
771
00:38:21,320 --> 00:38:23,280
Nous cherchons Elodie.
772
00:38:23,280 --> 00:38:27,960
HE SPEAKS IN FRENCH
773
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:30,920
Oui?
774
00:38:51,040 --> 00:38:54,880
It is 2,000 for the breath test, it is 4,000 for the passport.
775
00:38:54,880 --> 00:38:57,520
I need the money now. Er, no.
776
00:38:57,520 --> 00:38:59,440
No, we're only going to pay when we've got them.
777
00:38:59,440 --> 00:39:01,640
Money in advance, or you can go.
778
00:39:07,640 --> 00:39:09,960
So, the passports cost more than the breath test?
779
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:13,440
Well, the breath test is easy, it's like a mint in the mouth,
780
00:39:13,440 --> 00:39:15,760
but the passport is not easy.
781
00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:18,640
It is not paper any more, it is a polymer.
782
00:39:18,640 --> 00:39:20,360
And I'll need your passport.
783
00:39:21,920 --> 00:39:24,280
Mine? What for? To copy.
784
00:39:24,280 --> 00:39:26,560
Where do you think the fake's come from?
785
00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:28,880
With a different photograph, of course.
786
00:39:28,880 --> 00:39:31,840
Have you? Yes. Right, I've got that.
787
00:39:31,840 --> 00:39:33,200
Thank you.
788
00:39:36,120 --> 00:39:38,520
I'll get this back straight away?
789
00:39:38,520 --> 00:39:42,040
If you don't trust me, please, go to another. I don't mind.
790
00:39:45,640 --> 00:39:46,920
It's all right.
791
00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:56,480
Daniel Samuel Lyons, born in 1989, Manchester?
792
00:39:56,480 --> 00:39:58,160
Council officer.
793
00:40:00,200 --> 00:40:05,240
Explain to me, how did the council officer find himself here?
794
00:40:07,320 --> 00:40:08,440
Because of him.
795
00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:17,280
Now, breath test.
796
00:40:18,400 --> 00:40:19,560
Won't take long.
797
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:25,240
To be precise, we should have a qualified dentist in attendance,
798
00:40:25,240 --> 00:40:27,960
but we only have a nurse, so if you'd like to sue us
799
00:40:27,960 --> 00:40:31,120
for malpractice, we will fight you through the courts.
800
00:40:37,720 --> 00:40:40,240
Wait here. Two minutes.
801
00:40:40,240 --> 00:40:41,280
All right.
802
00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:44,640
Just a small cap on the tooth, it needs fixing.
803
00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:48,400
They say it hurts, but I'm sure you can manage.
804
00:40:48,400 --> 00:40:51,280
Boys like you, little bit of pain...
805
00:40:53,280 --> 00:40:54,840
Oh, my God.
806
00:40:54,840 --> 00:40:56,440
She hates us!
807
00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:57,680
She really hates us.
808
00:40:57,680 --> 00:41:00,560
What does she mean, this tooth cap thing?
809
00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:01,880
I hate teeth.
810
00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:03,360
I don't care.
811
00:41:03,360 --> 00:41:05,320
Just fix it in place with a hammer,
812
00:41:05,320 --> 00:41:06,880
just let me through!
813
00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:09,800
God, 6,000 euros.
814
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:12,960
Jesus. I'm sorry.
815
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:16,960
Hey, no...
816
00:41:16,960 --> 00:41:18,560
It's worth every penny.
817
00:41:18,560 --> 00:41:20,520
Really... Don't do that.
818
00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:25,320
I said... I said, duh, whatever it takes, didn't I?
819
00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:26,480
Hmm?
820
00:41:47,800 --> 00:41:50,520
Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit...
821
00:41:51,720 --> 00:41:53,240
Oh! What was it? Was it her?
822
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:57,280
She's coming back.
823
00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:01,360
She has to print that stuff...
824
00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:03,360
She's printed...
825
00:42:03,360 --> 00:42:04,840
She's coming back, yeah?
826
00:42:06,440 --> 00:42:07,560
Do you think?
827
00:42:23,240 --> 00:42:25,280
SCREAMS IN ANGUISH
828
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:36,560
You could still go home.
829
00:42:40,760 --> 00:42:44,000
Walk up to customs... "Hey, my passport was stolen."
830
00:42:45,440 --> 00:42:49,040
"OK, no problem, this way, sir."
831
00:42:50,720 --> 00:42:51,800
Yeah...
832
00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:54,080
Bye, then.
833
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:57,680
Well, you could. I'm taking you home.
834
00:42:59,000 --> 00:43:00,800
We can't get on the ferry.
835
00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:02,760
Well, we just have to try a different sort of plan.
836
00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:06,320
22 miles, that's all.
837
00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:09,880
Just need to cross 22 miles.
838
00:43:22,400 --> 00:43:24,360
Mummy.
839
00:43:24,360 --> 00:43:25,440
In you get.
840
00:43:36,400 --> 00:43:37,960
What an idiot.
841
00:43:37,960 --> 00:43:39,400
OK.
842
00:43:39,400 --> 00:43:42,240
I don't want you criticising your dad,
843
00:43:42,240 --> 00:43:44,760
but, yeah, blasted fool, fool man.
844
00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:51,480
I can't believe you knew for ages.
845
00:43:51,480 --> 00:43:53,440
So, you knew at Christmas?
846
00:43:53,440 --> 00:43:56,280
Yeah. And that party on New Year's Eve?
847
00:43:56,280 --> 00:43:58,760
Yeah. And on my birthday, you knew then?
848
00:43:58,760 --> 00:44:00,800
How did you do it?
849
00:44:00,800 --> 00:44:02,600
No choice.
850
00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:03,880
I was trapped here with him.
851
00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:07,160
No house, no money, no savings.
852
00:44:08,520 --> 00:44:10,680
I mean, what else could we have done?
853
00:44:10,680 --> 00:44:12,680
Go and live with your gran in Port Maria?
854
00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:14,440
Oh, no way. No, thanks.
855
00:44:16,120 --> 00:44:17,880
You know what she'd say?
856
00:44:17,880 --> 00:44:22,880
SHE IMITATES GRAN IN PORT MARIA: You not too wicked and bad. It's hell you're heading for!
857
00:44:22,880 --> 00:44:27,600
And as for you, Bethany, now bringing dem sodomite nastiness around you!
858
00:44:32,840 --> 00:44:34,280
The thing is, I get up at six.
859
00:44:37,280 --> 00:44:38,320
That's OK.
860
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:41,480
I get up at six and I do my exercises.
861
00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:42,960
I do callisthenics in here.
862
00:44:45,280 --> 00:44:48,240
Well, I'll stay in bed, if you don't mind.
863
00:44:48,240 --> 00:44:52,840
No, but I don't particularly want you watching.
864
00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:54,480
Why? What does callisthenics involve?
865
00:44:54,480 --> 00:44:55,520
Nothing.
866
00:44:57,440 --> 00:45:00,960
But it's mine, it's my little hour,
867
00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:02,000
all to myself.
868
00:45:04,560 --> 00:45:07,640
Well, I'll be asleep. But you won't.
869
00:45:07,640 --> 00:45:10,320
And we've only got the one room - you'll be staring.
870
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:16,520
So I thought you could get up at six and go for a coffee and come back
871
00:45:16,520 --> 00:45:18,240
at seven, is that all right? Um...
872
00:45:20,560 --> 00:45:21,880
Yeah, if you want.
873
00:45:21,880 --> 00:45:22,920
Thanks.
874
00:45:27,920 --> 00:45:29,440
Is that every day?
875
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:30,480
Yes.
876
00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:33,640
OK.
877
00:45:41,480 --> 00:45:44,080
OK, transport - 3,000 euros per person.
878
00:45:44,080 --> 00:45:46,120
So, 6,000 total.
879
00:45:46,120 --> 00:45:50,360
OK, but I refuse to give you the money until we're on the boat.
880
00:45:50,360 --> 00:45:51,400
You pay now.
881
00:45:51,400 --> 00:45:54,760
Yes, I understand, but I want to wait until I can see the boat.
882
00:45:54,760 --> 00:45:56,160
No, you have to pay now.
883
00:45:56,160 --> 00:45:58,680
Look, this has happened before and we have been robbed.
884
00:45:58,680 --> 00:46:00,640
Unfortunate! You pay now.
885
00:46:00,640 --> 00:46:02,720
Well, I absolutely refuse.
886
00:46:02,720 --> 00:46:04,000
OK, good luck.
887
00:46:04,000 --> 00:46:05,800
We finish.
888
00:46:05,800 --> 00:46:07,640
No, no, no, just wait, wait, wait, wait!
889
00:46:07,640 --> 00:46:09,000
Just look.
890
00:46:10,760 --> 00:46:11,960
I'll pay half.
891
00:46:11,960 --> 00:46:13,000
You give all.
892
00:46:19,560 --> 00:46:20,600
OK.
893
00:46:39,800 --> 00:46:45,640
FRENCH FEMALE NEWSREADER TALKING
894
00:47:03,080 --> 00:47:04,120
That's him.
895
00:47:05,680 --> 00:47:07,880
Yes! Come on, get the bag.
896
00:47:07,880 --> 00:47:14,400
THEY SPEAK IN OWN LANGUAGE
897
00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:29,240
It said Cran de Quette. It's a bit of headland.
898
00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:35,760
Hey, do you see? We're actually closer to England now. More like 20 miles.
899
00:47:48,320 --> 00:47:50,520
THEY SPEAK IN OWN LANGUAGE
900
00:47:50,520 --> 00:47:51,760
Is that the boat?
901
00:47:52,880 --> 00:47:55,320
That's not the boat that takes us to the boat?
902
00:47:55,320 --> 00:47:56,440
No, I think that's it.
903
00:47:57,840 --> 00:47:59,320
OK.
904
00:47:59,320 --> 00:48:02,000
Well, never mind, good. 20 miles - that's all.
905
00:48:03,160 --> 00:48:04,200
20 miles.
906
00:48:04,200 --> 00:48:08,840
THEY SPEAK IN OWN LANGUAGE
907
00:48:11,440 --> 00:48:15,200
OK, whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold on, hold on, hold on. Hold that, hold that.
908
00:48:17,240 --> 00:48:19,000
Danny, what are you doing?
909
00:48:19,000 --> 00:48:22,000
I'm keeping them dry - you should do the same.
910
00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:23,680
Danny, look, we're going to get wet.
911
00:48:23,680 --> 00:48:26,960
No, but I've worked with people, I've seen this, you get foot rot.
912
00:48:53,760 --> 00:48:55,400
Come over, come on!
913
00:49:06,760 --> 00:49:08,640
HORNS BEEP
914
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:09,680
Oh, shit!
915
00:49:13,120 --> 00:49:15,880
Oh, they're not getting on board, are they?
916
00:49:15,880 --> 00:49:18,840
There must be another boat, there's got to be another boat!
917
00:49:25,520 --> 00:49:29,200
There is no room! There's no room!
918
00:49:29,200 --> 00:49:35,120
There's not enough room, you can see, you can see, there's not enough room!
919
00:49:36,480 --> 00:49:37,760
HE SPEAKS IN OWN LANGUAGE
920
00:49:43,080 --> 00:49:48,280
Oh, shit! OK, budge up, budge up! No, no. Wait!
921
00:49:48,280 --> 00:49:52,600
It doesn't matter, doesn't matter! Come. Come.
922
00:49:52,600 --> 00:49:58,120
SHE SPEAKS IN OWN LANGUAGE
923
00:49:58,120 --> 00:50:01,160
Danny, we can get off. We can get off.
924
00:50:01,160 --> 00:50:06,080
No, we can do this. No. We can do it. No.
925
00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:17,640
THEY SPEAK IN OWN LANGUAGE
926
00:50:32,080 --> 00:50:40,080
SCREAMING
927
00:51:49,920 --> 00:51:50,960
Are you on your own?
928
00:51:52,880 --> 00:51:54,400
HE SPEAKS IN OWN LANGUAGE
929
00:51:54,400 --> 00:51:55,440
What's your name?
930
00:51:57,400 --> 00:51:58,680
HE SPEAKS IN OWN LANGUAGE
931
00:52:01,080 --> 00:52:02,920
Have you got any paperwork with you?
932
00:52:06,760 --> 00:52:08,040
HE SPEAKS IN OWN LANGUAGE
933
00:52:12,560 --> 00:52:13,840
Where have you come from?
934
00:52:20,600 --> 00:52:21,880
HE SPEAKS IN OWN LANGUAGE
935
00:52:33,400 --> 00:52:38,000
Astonishing, astonishing, astonishing!
936
00:53:07,760 --> 00:53:15,760
BEEPING
937
00:53:15,760 --> 00:53:16,800
BEEPING STOPS
938
00:53:59,040 --> 00:54:01,000
Call link.
939
00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:03,840
No, call family link, audio only.
940
00:54:03,840 --> 00:54:05,280
Calling family link.
941
00:54:08,920 --> 00:54:11,000
Danny, have you seen the news over here?
942
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:14,880
Your favourite woman Prime Minister! I've actually met her.
943
00:54:14,880 --> 00:54:18,840
I love it, she's a nightmare, the whole system's in pieces.
944
00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:22,440
Oh, Dan, mate, no, take me off the family link.
945
00:54:22,440 --> 00:54:25,680
We've got to catch up. A lot of things have changed since you went away.
946
00:54:25,680 --> 00:54:27,120
Sorry, Celeste.
947
00:54:27,120 --> 00:54:29,560
I don't mind. It doesn't bother me, you stay on the link.
948
00:54:29,560 --> 00:54:31,880
Just do what you want. You're very fond of saying
949
00:54:31,880 --> 00:54:33,160
it's your family.
950
00:54:33,160 --> 00:54:34,560
Don't start.
951
00:54:34,560 --> 00:54:39,920
Excuse me! I think, if anyone started this, it was you, Stephen.
952
00:54:39,920 --> 00:54:44,000
Can I just point out - Daniel left his husband for someone else, no-one had a go at him.
953
00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:45,880
Me, it's the end of the world.
954
00:54:45,880 --> 00:54:47,400
Why is that?
955
00:54:47,400 --> 00:54:48,760
I thought I'd better say.
956
00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:52,200
Oh, Viktor, sorry, are you OK?
957
00:54:52,200 --> 00:54:53,840
Hello! Where are you?
958
00:54:53,840 --> 00:54:55,840
Oh, Vik, mate, do us a favour - put Daniel on.
959
00:54:55,840 --> 00:54:57,280
It's a long story.
960
00:54:57,280 --> 00:54:59,400
Wait, sorry, but it says you're home.
961
00:54:59,400 --> 00:55:01,560
You're phoning from Uncle Dan's. You're in Britain?
962
00:55:01,560 --> 00:55:03,080
Oh, my God, no way!
963
00:55:03,080 --> 00:55:04,360
You did it.
964
00:55:04,360 --> 00:55:05,520
How did that happen?
965
00:55:05,520 --> 00:55:07,200
Oh, that's brilliant!
966
00:55:07,200 --> 00:55:09,160
That's amazing! How did you do it, Dan?
967
00:55:11,440 --> 00:55:12,600
Danny, are you there?
968
00:55:15,160 --> 00:55:16,920
I'm at the house and Daniel's dead.
969
00:55:19,560 --> 00:55:20,920
I'm sorry, but he drowned.
970
00:55:22,960 --> 00:55:25,760
We thought we could get across the Channel,
971
00:55:25,760 --> 00:55:30,240
but on the news it says 17 bodies - that was Daniel.
972
00:55:31,480 --> 00:55:33,120
He's dead.
973
00:55:33,120 --> 00:55:34,160
He drowned.
974
00:55:35,480 --> 00:55:39,040
We got half a mile from the shore, but that's a very long way.
975
00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:42,680
What? The police don't know.
976
00:55:42,680 --> 00:55:45,240
His passport was gone, his wallet was in his bag,
977
00:55:45,240 --> 00:55:46,280
and his bag was lost.
978
00:55:47,840 --> 00:55:51,960
So, he's in a town on the coast called Rye, unidentified.
979
00:55:53,560 --> 00:55:54,800
I didn't want to do that.
980
00:55:56,560 --> 00:56:00,360
But I thought, if I came here, they'd never find me.
981
00:56:03,640 --> 00:56:05,000
That doesn't work, I know.
982
00:56:07,440 --> 00:56:12,120
I apologise to you all, but we got on the boat,
983
00:56:12,120 --> 00:56:13,440
and the boat sank.
984
00:56:14,400 --> 00:56:15,440
And he's dead.
985
00:56:19,160 --> 00:56:22,360
I came home. Is this home?
986
00:57:07,120 --> 00:57:08,160
OK.
987
00:57:35,880 --> 00:57:38,840
KNOCK ON DOOR
988
00:57:38,840 --> 00:57:42,320
Viktor, please, are you there?
989
00:57:42,320 --> 00:57:44,720
Viktor!
990
00:57:44,720 --> 00:57:46,120
Viktor?
991
00:57:46,120 --> 00:57:49,280
Open the door!
992
00:57:49,280 --> 00:57:52,800
Viktor!
992
00:57:53,305 --> 00:57:59,889
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