All language subtitles for veronica.mars.s04e04.web.h264-tbs-en

VERONICA:
Previously on Veronica Mars...

[ gasps ]
‐ Give me your wallet and phone.

‐ I'm sorry.
‐ [ taser crackles, mugger screams ]

‐ Give me your wallet, kid.

KEITH:
They're saying four dead.

The motel owner, Sul Ross...

‐ No to NUTT.
KEITH: was one of 'em.

‐ I'm waiting on forensic results
from a piece of shrapnel

that I think may prove to be
the proverbial nail in Maloof's coffin.

This nail was pulled from my back.

KEITH:
"Re‐enter the Senate race.

The next time we won't miss."

‐ Someone's claiming credit
for the bombing?

‐ The same emailer's been blackmailing me
for the past year.

‐ Where's the ring, raghead?!

‐ I don't know!

‐ Liar! Abu Ghraaaah!

‐ [ Daniel screams ]
‐ [ Tyler laughs ]

‐ Kill those two guys back there.
I never want to see them again.

‐ [ crowd cheers ]

[ distant explosion ]

[ people screaming ]

[ scratching record ]
[ dance music playing ]

DISC JOCKEY:
How you doin' out there?

‐ So, my stunt double on this movie

was Chris Hemsworth's stunt double
on Thor,

which basically makes us
Eskimo brothers. [ laughs ]

‐ So, you slept with your stunt double?

‐ Hm? Mm! What? No.

That doesn't mean‐‐

And hey, I don't, but if I did,
I could do a lot worse than my stunt guy.

‐ [ laughs ]
‐ Know what I mean?

‐ 'Sup. Hey, I'm Bryce.

‐ Hey, Bryce, this is a private convo,
buddy.

‐ C'mon, share the wealth, bro.

Alyssa,
you'd be into that, right?

A little two‐on‐you action?

‐ Move along!
God, I am so sorry.

‐ Yeah, your friend sucks.
DICK: Hmm?

Hm‐umh.

[ slurps ] Hey, come back!

I was a hundred feet away
from a bombing today. I need to be held.

Argh.
[ ringtone plays ]

You got Dick.

‐ They're now saying one dead,
12 injured, two critically.

‐ I've seen people blown up by IEDs.

It's horrifying, but you kind of
expect it in Yemen.

‐ Like, how do you not
just keep reliving that in your head?

How you get past that?

‐ Ohhhh, baby! Yes!

I got it.
‐ Chlamydia?

‐ [ laughs ]
‐ Could have been so much worse.

DICK:
No, dude,

the new Lifetime Christmas movie,

I got that. OK, it's gonna be so rad.

It's about this sad but smokin' hot chick

who falls in love with a mannequin
who comes to life.

I play her jealous ex,
who's also a mannequin.

‐ Ripped from the headlines.

‐ I'm sorry. She fell in love
with two mannequins?

‐ Ahh. So goodbye, Neptune,

[ with Cockney accent ]
and hello, Romania.

‐ Hey, the bartender said
that you're the owner?

‐ Yeah.
‐ Well, I saw this clown's friend

put some powdery shit
in those girls' drinks.

That guy over there.

DICK:
That guy is not my friend.

‐ I lose two‐thirds of my patrons,
but the predators stick around.

[ phone beeps ]
NICOLE: Kyle?

KYLE: Yeah.
‐ Yeah, you see the doofus at table 20?

KYLE: I see him.
‐ I wanna talk to him.

‐ Hey. You familiar with Lifetime?
Or... Christmas?

‐ Or mannequins?

‐ Hm. Hm‐mm.

KYLE: All right, buddy, let's go.
‐ Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's‐‐ okay.

‐ [ sighs ]
Maybe he'll get hit by a car.

‐ Wait. They speak English
in Romania, don't they?

[ cawing ]

‐ [ sobbing ]
No, don't do this! Please!

‐ Okay! We'll go home!
You'll never hear from us again!

[ brothers sobbing ]

‐ [ panting ]

Uhh.

[ theme music playing ]

SINGER:
♪ A long time ago ♪

♪ We used to be friends ♪

♪ But I haven't thought of you
lately at all ♪

♪ Bring it on, bring it on, yeah ♪

♪ Just remember me when ♪

♪ We used to be friends ♪

♪ A long time ago ♪

♪ We used to be friends ♪

♪ A long time ago ♪

♪ We used to be friends ♪

♪ Hey ♪

KEITH:
This latest explosion

just reinforces our sense that...

what happened at the Sea Sprite
was bigger than Perry Walsh.

‐ That's not what the police chief
is saying.

She says he planted the bomb
before he died.

‐ You're stickin' to your theory?

‐ Yes.

We still believe that it's possible

that these bombings
are part of an orchestrated campaign

to destroy Neptune's reputation
as a spring break destination.

‐ If we are going to continue paying you,

you could at least find the ring
the Carr family stole from us.

ALEX:
No one stole anything.

I gave Tawny that ring.

‐ Enough!

Sorry.

That was, uh‐‐

I'm just eager for us
to put this behind us.

‐ We're gonna keep digging.

I'm talking to some of
the other businesses on the boardwalk.

Veronica is heading out of town
to speak to some past associates

of people that we believe
might be involved.

‐ We'll keep you apprised.

[ in‐house music playing ]

‐ Business was already shot to hell

after the first bomb, and judging
by last night's crowd,

Chattanooga Charlie's
is on a rocket ship to oblivion.

You ever seen the Country Girl Shake
with four people?

‐ Can't say I have.

‐ Yeah. It's sad.

Spring break pays for my year.
It pays for everybody's year down here.

Ya know, now you got that
quote‐unquote "civic group,"

the nutjobs or nutball‐‐ what is it?

‐ I think it's just NUTT.

‐ Well, the measures they wanna pass,

even if I could scrape enough together
to adjust my signage,

the parking regs and one‐way streets
would do me in, I mean‐‐ [ scoffs ]

But I guess the owner of the Sea Sprite
would probably trade problems.

‐ You two were friends?

‐ I just got to know him recently.

I mean, all us boardwalk businesses
are under siege right now,

and Sul was kind of our Princess Leia,
organizing the resistance.

You know, sendin' out emails,
passin' out flyers.

‐ When you say "under siege, um...

[ clears throat ] there's no delicate way
to put this, um...

has anyone taken a dump
in your ice machine?

‐ [ laughs ] See, where I'm from,
the phrase is "turd in a punchbowl."

‐ It's a crazy question, I know, I‐‐

I just learned that Sul was dealing
with a serial defecator at his motel.

‐ Oh.

Gotcha. I‐‐

I mean, there's been some pretty bad shit
goin' down around here, yeah.

Did you see the mural outside‐‐
Dolly Parton, Davy Crockett, Phil Fulmer,

Smoky Mountains risin' up behind 'em‐‐
on the side of my buildin' out here?

‐ Can't say I did.

‐ Yeah, damn right you didn't.
You know why?

'Cause a bunch of dickhead bikers
kept taggin' it.

So I just painted over
the whole damn thing.

It's just as well I'm gettin' out.

‐ You're closin' down?

‐ Done sold the place.

I ain't stickin' around for
that piece of shrapnel with my name on it.

‐ If you don't mind my asking,
to Team Casablancas Realty?

‐ Hell no. No.

I mean, they made an offer,
but that offer was a joke.

No, I'm sellin' to some nice people
from back home who reached out to me.

I mean, they're gonna
keep the place as is, so...

‐ Huh.
CHARLIE: Yeah.

Folks are from Murfreesboro.

Yeah, I mean,
I'm gonna be takin' a haircut,

but it ain't nothin' like the scalpin'
Big Shithead was gonna give me.

Plus, they're big Vols fans,
so I know they're accustomed to misery.

[ sighs ] Besides, it's not like I got
much of a choice at this point.

‐ You said they reached out to you.

How, exactly?

[ buzzer sounds ]

[ indistinct P. A. announcement ]

VERONICA:
I've sent men to jail,

and I've taken satisfaction from it.
Always.

When you're raped
and your best friend is murdered,

all before your 17th birthday,

you don't develop a keen sense of mercy.

My trip to Chino
to visit the ghosts of cases past

didn't soften my stance.

‐ [ chuckles ] So...

you're still a private investigator.

In Neptune.

‐ Yep.

‐ Aww.

‐ There are a few names
I wanted to run by you‐‐

‐ P.I.

That was your job in high school,
right?

Huh? [ laughs ]

But by now, I suppose now, you‐‐

you probably got big, fancy offices,

an assistant.

Hmm? No?

Huh.

Kids?

I'd love to see pictures.
Come on.

[ laughing ] Sorry, I‐‐ [ grunts ]

I'm getting ahead of myself.

Have you landed a husband?

‐ What have you been up to, Tim?

Kill anyone else?

I see you haven't made use
of the copious free weights.

Have... you landed a husband?

‐ Well, if you must know‐‐

‐ I must. I must.

‐ I've been writing legal motions
for my fellow prisoners,

and a number of them have been released.

I'm quite well‐thought‐of around here.

‐ MS‐13, the Bloods,
the Aryan Brotherhood‐‐

they all think
you're a righteous dude?

About those names.

‐ There's nothing I'd like to do more

than help the college freshman
who put me here. Yes.

‐ Dick Casablancas.

Clyde Pickett. Perry Walsh.

‐ What about 'em?

‐ Stop it, Tim.
TIM: [ laughs ]

‐ If I'm sure of anything
about my old T.A., it's this:

you know what I'm asking.

You know I'm unmarried,
you know I don't have kids,

you know the case I'm investigating.

They have search engines in here.

Now dazzle me with your insights.

What's this, your autobiography?

‐ [ scoffs ] It's a list of books.

We'll trade.

I'll tell you what you wanna know,
and you send me those books.

They're hard to come by in here.

‐ Fine.

‐ Clyde Pickett? Don't know him.

[ laughs ]

Now, Big Dick and Perry,
those two I saw a lot of.

They both worked in the library,
I spend many hours in there.

‐ Were they friendly?

‐ Can't say,
but they had nothing in common.

I suppose they both were misogynists,

though in very, uh, different ways.

Awful people.

You know what it's like
when someone makes your skin crawl?

‐ I sure do.

Oh. Self‐awareness
was never your strong suit, was it?

‐ Which is why I've had to rely
on charm and good looks.

God. It is good to see you, Veronica.
How's tricks?

You still with... Puz?

I think that's the last that I heard.

News does travel slow around here.

So few Hearst alums around
to shoot the shit with.

‐ You told me you knew Clyde Pickett.

‐ So, you ever see Logan?

God, the way he treated you
back in the day.

It's a good thing you got rid of that guy.

Total train wreck, huh?

‐ Logan Echolls
is a decorated Navy pilot

now serving as an intelligence officer
for his country.

How 'bout you?
Are you still a rapist?

‐ [ chuckles ]
So you two keep in touch, huh?

Next time you see him‐‐
[ laughs ]

this is gonna make him laugh‐‐

ask him about that time
that we went to this club in Tijuana.

Dirty's, I think it was called.
That may be a loose translation.

He was with Rosa,
or Easy Ezzy. Hmm.

Now me, I‐‐
I didn't consider her easy per se,

I considered her a capitalist.

Eh, hold on, hold on.

I'm gonna tell you some stuff, okay?

I just miss discourse
with someone worthy.

‐ Clyde Picket.
MERCER: [ sighs ]

So you and Logan, huh?

That's a love story for the ages.
Good for you kids.

‐ Last chance.

‐ Got a parole hearing comin' up.

It's about goddamn time, right?

But we get the news in here.

Ya know, guy at Stanford,
he gets six months.

Guy at University of Wisconsin
gets three years for multiple rapes,

and yet, here I am. Hmm?

Learnin' harmonica

and draggin' my tin cup
across the bars of my cell,

well into my second decade.
[ smacks table ]

Where's the justice?

‐ When did you say
that parole hearing was again?

‐ I didn't.
VERONICA: Oh.

That'll be easy enough to find out.
I'm gonna put it in my datebook.

There's a lot of stuff
I'd like to tell the parole board.

‐ Clyde Pickett... you say?

VERONICA:
Mercer told me

Clyde was Big Dick's protector,

and it was kind of a joke
to the rest of the prisoners.

Clyde was respected,
people didn't mess with him,

but Clyde conned Big Dick,

saw him as a future payday,
which seems to be coming true.

‐ And Big Dick worked for Perry Walsh
in the library. That's interesting.

‐ Perry's misogyny
fits with his manifesto.

Or fits with someone writing a manifesto
to sound like Walsh.

And who appears clever enough to do that?

Your buddy Clyde.
‐ He's not my buddy.

‐ What did you learn
down at the boardwalk?

‐ Same sort of harassment happening
to Sul Ross has been going on everywhere.

Just enough to imagine
it's a conspiracy.

At the same time,
just enough to believe

that we're batshit‐crazy
conspiracy theorists.

[ knocking ]

‐ Matty, hi.

‐ You guys talking
about the bombing case?

‐ As a matter of fact.
You... mind givin' us a minute?

‐ Sure.

‐ Her dad was trying to organize
the boardwalk businesses.

‐ Well, that explains why
he was targeted.

‐ Big Dick has been trying to buy up
boardwalk real estate

for the past couple of years‐‐
lowball offers, though.

Most resisted.
Spring break was a gold mine,

so property owners never felt
like they needed to sell.

Post bombings, Casablancas
is getting even more aggressive.

Offers are pennies on the dollar.

‐ [ sighs ] He can't even overpay

to destroy a community
like a regular cuss‐head.

[ conversation continues, muffled ]

‐ ...gets weird.

Most owners have also recently
been approached

by Mom‐and‐Pop outfits.

They got letters with personal appeals.

Better offers than‐‐ than Dick's,
but not by much.

Some have sold,
some are holding out.

‐ Did you get offer sheets
on the ones selling?

‐ Yeah. Buyers are all shell companies.

KEITH:
I'm looking into it.

Wish we had Mac around.
This computer stuff ain't my strong suit.

[ device beeping ]

‐ [ gasping ]

BRYCE:
Hey‐‐ Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey. Hey. Can you see
what's around my neck?!

‐ [ woman screaming ]
‐ Can you see what's around my neck?!

Is it a bomb?! It's a bomb.

Stop! You can't just‐‐
‐ He's got a bomb!

‐ Hey! Somebody help me!
MAN: Oh, my God!

BRYCE:
Somebody help!

OPERATOR:
911. What's your emergency?

WOMAN: There's a bomb!
OPERATOR: What's your address?

[ beeping continues ]

OPERATOR:
Ma'am, please tell me your address.

[ beeping speeds up ]
WOMAN: Where are we?!

Where are we‐‐
[ explosion ]

[ chatter, phones ringing ]

‐ The forensics report
as soon as it comes in.

COP: Yes, Chief.
‐ I want a copy of the witness canvass

on my desk now.
‐ You got it.

‐ Hey, Chief, phones don't stop ringin'.

People think anything
the size of a bread box

they don't recognize is a bomb.
‐ Wonderful.

‐ And just to remind you,

San Diego mayor's office
and the chief of staff.

‐ Oh, shit. That's this morning?
‐ It's now.

They're both in your office
waiting for you.

And something else.

‐ Is it related to the bombing?
‐ No.

Well, kind of‐‐ But‐‐
‐ Just go deal with it yourself.

Jim! Sheila! How are you?

SHEILA:
We heard on our way here.

The boy had a bomb
locked around his neck?

MARCIA:
Yeah, karmic justice.

He spent last night trying
to roofie girls at nightclubs.

But we're on top of it.

Uh, would you excuse me
for just a moment?

Just make yourself comfortable.

Who's that with Dobbins?

‐ That's what I was trying to tell you.
The mayor called in the FBI.

‐ [ sighs ]
‐ Marcia, maybe it'd be best

if we do this another time.

Everyone still thinks you'd be
a good fit for us in San Diego.

‐ Most everyone.

‐ [ stammers ]
You've come such a long way.

I mean, it'd be a shame for you
to have to turn around‐‐

‐ You have a lot on your plate here.

We'll have our offices reschedule.

‐ Well, should we just get them
on the phone now? I‐‐

‐ Worry about these bombs.

We'll be in touch.

MAYOR DOBBINS:
Marcia.

Come on over here.
I want you to meet someone.

Chief Langdon,
this is Agent Woods from the FBI.

‐ Thanks for accommodating us.

‐ Leo D'Amato. How ya doin'?

‐ Agent D'Amato, Agent Woods.

While it's lovely to meet both of you‐‐

‐ Oh, no, it's lovely to meet you.

Too. Ha.

Ah... you weren't done, were you?

‐ Well, as I've already explained
to the mayor,

this is not an FBI matter.

None of the bombings occurred
at a college, university,

or a property used in interstate
or foreign commerce.

‐ We're not here to investigate terrorism.

We think we might be dealing
with a serial killer.

‐ Which is very much
within the bureau's jurisdiction.

‐ You know what?
The more the merrier. Right?

I mean, why not. We've already got
a pizza boy, private investigators, and‐‐

‐ Private investigators?

Which ones?

‐ Hey. Uh, I'm Leo.

‐ I didn't order a pizza.

‐ Oh, I'm not‐‐

[ chuckling ] Okay.

Um, I'm a friend of Veronica's.
Is she around?

‐ She's not. Uh, was she expecting you?

‐ Not really.
I haven't seen her in a few years.

I lost her number.

Normally, I woulda called first.

‐ Instead, you brought a pizza.

‐ I did.

It's kind of a running joke.

‐ Oh, I love jokes! Let's hear it.

‐ It's not really a‐‐

Okay. Uh, in the past,

when Veronica needed information,
she would bring me food.

‐ Yeah. That's a good one.

That's a good one.
She does love information.

‐ She does.

Well, would you mind
letting her know I stopped by?

‐ Oh, don't worry.
I'm sure she'll be back any minute.

Come on in.

[ rap music sung in Spanish ]

‐ Oh! Let's go!

‐ I'll be right back.

‐ Who are they?

[ ball clatters on backboard ]

‐ Hoodlums.

[ players chatter ]

‐ This is you, right?

‐ Just keep running your mouth.

VERONICA:
Well, what I wanna know, Juan Diego,

is, what do you have
against the Sea Sprite?

Or is it just when you gotta go,
you gotta go?

‐ [ guys laughing ]
‐ Somethin' like that.

‐ I don't think it is.

Is the same person that's having you
screw with the boardwalk businesses

having you mug people?

What is it, a hundy
for every wallet you hand them?

Tell me the truth,

and I'll give you back
the cash I took from you.

‐ Yo, Juan Diego, she took your money?

‐ [ guys laughing ]

‐ How 'about I just take that money...

and whatever else I want from you?

GUY 2:
Yeah, that's right, man.

‐ Come on, young buck.

The money is one thing, but when you
add the sexual component,

it really makes me want to shoot you.

Can't we all just get along?

[ motorcycles approaching ]

‐ Too late for getting along now.

‐ [ Veronica yelping ]

[ engines revving,
brakes squealing ]

JUAN DIEGO:
Yo, Kha'n!

Get her purse from her car‐‐

Aaah! Ohhh!

[ moaning ]

‐ [ Veronica gasping ]

WEEVIL:
Ratón!

Let her go‐‐
before she hurts you too.

‐ [ Juan Diego snarling ]
[ gun fires ]

MAN:
Oh, damn.

‐ The next one goes in your bike.

Hit the road, boys.
You all got better things to do.

‐ [ subdued chatter ]

[ motorcycles start,
engines rev ]

‐ Quite the mentoring program
you've got here.

How's the straight life?

You wouldn't be chopping cars in here
like your uncle did, right?

‐ I think the words you're looking for
are "thank you."

‐ Who's she?

‐ Her dad used to be sheriff.

The two of 'em are P. I. s now.

They have some weird history
with my brother.

[ starts car ]

VERONICA: Muggings.

Vandalism. Bombings.

Regular Fagin now, huh?

‐ What did you say?

‐ Relax. It was a literary reference.

‐ Oh, I got the Oliver Twist shout‐out.
But did you say bombings?

[ laughs ] Yeah.
It was me behind the grassy knoll, too.

‐ You, your boys‐‐

you're doing grunt work for the people
who want to destroy this town.

Fine. Whatever.

Sell out, then!

‐ Ya know, it must be nice
to have choices, Veronica.

[ door opens ]

VERONICA:
[ sighs ] Hi.

Hey, buddy. [ kiss ]

Hi!
LOGAN: Hi yourself.

‐ Mushroom? That's not your usual.

‐ Okay. I think I see
where this is headed.

Are you accusing me
of being with another woman, because...?

‐ I am definitely not
accusing you of‐‐

[ door opens ]

‐ Oh. Shit.

The jig is up.

‐ Hey, Veronica.

‐ Hi... Leo.

‐ [ chuckles ]

‐ I think Piz is back there too.
Somewhere.

Piz?

VERONICA: The FBI.
‐ Mm‐hm.

‐ Wow. I am very impressed.

And a little jealous, I think.

I heard you got married,
but... I don't see a ring.

‐ I noticed that too.

‐ Ah, divorced.
VERONICA: Hmm.

‐ I'm here on this bomber case.

People upstairs knew
I had some local knowledge.

Police chief says you and your dad
are workin' the case.

She's a piece of work.

VERONICA:
That she is.

So you G‐men come to town
and piggyback off the local shamuses?

‐ It's page one of the handbook.
‐ Okay.

Fine. How about lunch tomorrow?

‐ Uh, yeah. That sounds good.

‐ Good to see you, Leo.

‐ Yeah, uh, you‐‐ you too.

‐ Oh. Sorry.

‐ Thanks for the hospitality.

‐ Thank you for the pizza.
‐ Yeah, you got it.

‐ [ sighs ]

Hey. I know that was a little, um...

‐ Sounds like you two spent
quite a bit of time together

when I was landing on aircraft carriers
in the Persian Gulf.

‐ On the rape case at the Grand.
I told you about that.

‐ My version, it was
"this San Diego police detective."

I didn't know there was a history.

‐ There it is. That vintage
Logan Echolls jealousy.

Oh, I'm gonna mainline it.
‐ No, no.

‐ Unh!
‐ It's no biggie. Seriously.

Harlots?

‐ [ Veronica laughs softly ]
‐ [ kiss ]

[ TV beeps ]

LYDIA: Hunt cannot bar us
from Golden Square

as long as we stay chaste within it.

Go back and gather the girls.

We'll send word to Abbadon
to prepare the house.

I have business with this harridan.
[ laughs ]

PENN:
All rightie.

Got a six‐foot sub
if anyone's interested.

No tomatoes. I‐‐
I know how you feel about tomatoes, Carol.

‐ Thanks. I'm‐‐ I'm not hungry.

DON [ via computer ]:
You know what? I'll have a piece.

Good. You see how that doesn't work?

‐ Yes, I do, Don.

‐ So you're not going to go on TV
and articulate some baseless theory

about how you can insert
a section of hoagie into your disc drive

and then have said hoagie
come out of my disc drive in D. C.?

‐ I don't have a disc drive, Don.
Do you still have a disc drive?

‐ Several.

‐ Great. Uh, shall we get started?

‐ Why'd you have to
mention the group on the air?

‐ My mother was watching, Penn.

‐ Okay, Carol, I‐‐
I didn't‐‐ I didn't mean‐‐

‐ The group hadn't landed
on Daniel Maloof.

That was all you.

DON:
I see half a stranger back there.

Move into frame, love.

PENN:
Oh, this is Matty Ross.

I invited her.
Her... dad owned the Sea Sprite,

and she's here looking for answers.

CAROL: I'm so sorry for your loss.
HERC: Sorry.

DON: Matty.

We were actually just discussing

how Penn was shown up
by the Neptune police.

‐ Uh, Neptune police
didn't show him up.

‐ Well, they did find
this Perry Walsh character.

Although he's obviously the patsy,
right?

‐ No. No, not the police. That was, um...

that was me telling Veronica Mars
about how we weren't supposed to have gum

in our vending machines.

Veronica and I staked out the place,
got pictures of the guy,

and then her dad tracked him down
and gave the information to the police.

‐ Uh‐‐ Huh. Uh...

‐ What's that about blind squirrels
and nuts?

‐ But‐‐ But they're wrong, right?

There's no way that Perry Walsh
attached a horse collar bomb

to a guy that fell asleep on the beach.

‐ Well, they don't think
Walsh is the guy, either.

PAUL: What?
‐ What?

PENN:
Well, what‐‐

what do they think?

DON:
Does it matter?

Neither has credibility.

‐ It has something to do with Chino

and‐‐ and stuff happening on the boardwalk
during spring break.

DON:
Logic, folks.

Let's focus on logic and facts.

‐ So, I just had a very weird experience.

‐ If this is one of your "I met a woman
with a cane fetish" stories,

I'm not interested.

‐ [ laughing ] No such luck!

I tracked down Clyde Picket's ex,

the lovely, lovely Ichiko Doi.

You know how he mentioned
she broke up with him

when he got arrested?
‐ Mm‐hm.

‐ Here's what he didn't mention.

She knew where
he was stashing his cash reserves,

and absconded
with said reserves.

‐ How much did she steal?

‐ Three hundred and ninety‐two thousand
dollars, give or take.

‐ Whoa.

You're not gonna tell Clyde
where she is, are you?

‐ That was my recommendation to her,

but, uh, Ichiko wants him to get in touch.

She's still crazy about him.

‐ Or mostly just crazy?

‐ Told ya. Weird.

[ knock on door ]
PENN: Hello?

‐ Back here!

‐ Or she knows him
better than we do.

Clyde doesn't sound like a guy

who would strap a bomb
around a college student's neck.

If he is who she says he is, it‐‐

it puts quite a dent
in our operating theory.

PENN:
Ho‐ho! The brain trust.

I can feel the synapses firing.

‐ Did you order a pizza?

‐ Okay, fine. Yeah. I deserve that.

‐ So, no pizza?

‐ I just wanted to run a proposal
by the two of you.

Do you have a minute?

‐ I'll bite.

‐ What do you say...
we pool our resources?

‐ I say no.
‐ Get‐‐

Let me get the pitch out first, okay?

Mars and Murderheads
united to solve the case.

W‐We would work for free, and yes,

some of them are bozos,
one in particular,

but most of them have
some serious investigative skills.

[ phone chimes ]

‐ Daniel Maloof.

Wants to see us ASAP.

‐ You remember Maloof, right?

You wrongly accused him of murder?

‐ I know that I've made a mess of things,

but I‐I'd love a chance
to set things right.

If not for me, for Matty and Sul.

‐ Well, that's a‐‐ a generous offer. We‐‐

‐ There's‐‐ 'Kay. There's no need.

Was probably a stupid idea anyway.

Well... thank you for your time.

‐ Unless you were into it.

KEITH:
She's out there, ya know.

‐ Who?

‐ The woman with the cane fetish.

And she's smart as a whip.

With legs up to here
and dimples of Venus.

‐ I'm not gonna have to call
this cane woman "Mom," am I?

‐ Time will tell.

[ elevator bell dings ]

KEITH:
Well, look at this.

Just the man we're hopin' to find.

‐ That's sweet, Keith. Thank you.

[ doors close ]

‐ So you said it was urgent?

‐ Uh, let's wait.

‐ [ whispers ] I think
he doesn't want me to hear.

[ Muzak playing ]

[ bell dings ]

‐ Logan, head on in.
I'll just be a minute.

[ key card beeps ]

It's from the blackmailer.

He always sends
from different email addresses,

but I'm sure it's him.

He claims responsibility
for the Sea Sprite bomb.

He says my family should live in fear

if I don't resume my political career,
run for the Senate.

‐ I'm just gonna forward myself
this email.

‐ No, no. He said not to forward
or to show it to anyone.

That's why I asked you
to come in person.

‐ Yeah. Gut feeling here:

it's an empty threat.
He wants something from you, Mr.‐‐

‐ Maloof.
‐ Maloof.

Sorry, I, um...

‐ The point is,

why would your blackmailer
set off the other explosions?

It doesn't make any sense.

[ door opens ]

‐ You all might want to see this.

‐ Hey! There's the rest
of the dream team!

[ laughs ]

Pimpin' cane, Keith.
KEITH: Vinnie.

‐ Maybe it's not a woman
with a cane fetish.

‐ Mother, what's going on?

‐ I hired my own P.I.

To find the ring.

‐ Oh, come on.

You gotta let it go.
The ring is gone.

‐ Is it?

You have my word. I will
scour the globe for as long as it takes‐‐

weeks, months, years‐‐

‐ Decades. Centuries. Millennia!

‐ If necessary.

And, oh, uh, hey, by the way,

thank you for the opportunity.

Ya know, if you guys didn't drop the ball
on finding the ring‐‐

‐ They don't care about the ring.
‐ They don't care about the ring?

You don't care about the ring?

From what I hear, it's an heirloom
that dates back to the pharaohs.

‐ Yes.
‐ [ Alex snorts ]

‐ Ya know what,
this is gonna be fantastic.

This is gonna be absolutely fantastic,
the three of us workin' together.

‐ We're not working together.
‐ Sure. We're like the Avengers, ya know?

I'm Tony Stark, Iron Man‐‐

obviously‐‐
and your dad, he's...

I don't know, is there a‐‐
a bald Avenger?

And you're Pepper Potts.

Ya know? You're, uh,
you're the girl

who helps me on with my iron suit
and runs my errands.

I got it: Captain No‐hair‐ica.

[ laughing ]
Captain No‐hair‐ica.

[ laughs ] Oh, man, I wish my mom
could see me now.

Oh. Workin' for a congressman.

‐ Why don't you just tell her tomorrow
when she's cleaning your room?

‐ [ Keith laughing ]
‐ Hey. Hey, Keith. Seriously.

You know what you guys need
to solve this whole bombing thing?

‐ [ snaps fingers ]
Vision.

Oh, wait. I was still on bald Avengers.

‐ No. More like a 1998
Econoline panel van, okay?

Low mileage, great for surveillance
and whatnot. You know what I mean?

Wink, wink, wink‐‐
‐ We got it covered, Vin.

[ door closes ]

‐ I'm gonna need
that retainer check now.

VINNIE:
Bang.

[ whistling ]

I haven't found the ring yet.
I'm good, but I'm not that good.

‐ No, I‐I need your help
on something else.

I want you to locate two men.

They're in a black Yukon
with Mexican plates.

Obviously, I'm willing to pay
on top of the other fee.

‐ Well, obviously I wouldn't do it
if you weren't.

[ indistinct radio chatter ]

‐ So, what is your big FBI brain
telling you about these bombings?

‐ Well, I'd say it's even money
that your chief of police

detonates her next bomb
right here in this office.

‐ You're not feelin' the love?

‐ Ooh, no.

She is slow‐walking
every piece of evidence.

Got nothin' on the first two bombs.

I never thought I'd say this,
but I kinda miss Sheriff Lamb.

‐ Yeah. He was dumb and easy
to manipulate, I'll give him that.

‐ Yeah. A good lay, too.

‐ [ coughs, snorts ]
LEO: What?

You know, those deputy jobs
were very hard to come by.

‐ Off that, I think I'm gonna head out.

‐ What, because I sold my body
to advance my career?

Veronica, I was young.

‐ I think I'm gonna go do
a little research.

On this nail.

‐ Those are the nails that forensics found
at the bomb sites.

‐ Wanna go with me
to the hardware store?

‐ Why not?

LEO:
Nails are to the left.

[ indistinct chatter ]

‐ What?

VERONICA:
Clyde Pickett.

‐ Who's Clyde Pickett?

‐ Met Neptune's biggest
real estate developer

while doing time in Chino.

We're working an angle
that involves the two of them.

CLERK:
Find everything all right?

‐ This looks like the one
used in the bombs, doesn't it?

‐ Yeah.

CLERK:
And here's your change, sir.

‐ Thank you.
CLERK: Have a great day.

‐ Would it be rude to follow him?

[ door bell jingling ]

‐ Be malpractice not to.

[ car lock chirps ]

LEO: Huh.

Looks a lot like Mars Investigations.

‐ You are in the FBI.

‐ Yes.

‐ Clyde asked us to find his ex.

My dad thought taking the case
would allow him to explore our theory.

‐ Ahh.

‐ This shouldn't take long.

Dad's just filling him in
on what he knows.

CLYDE:
So you found Ichiko!

KEITH: A lovely woman.
CLYDE: Right?

‐ I can see why you were
so interested in finding her.

‐ So where is she?

‐ Ah. Well, she wasn't quite ready
for me to give you that information.

‐ Oh.

‐ But... here's her email address.

She said she'd love to hear from you.

‐ Oh. Journey of a thousand miles
begins with a single step, right?

So, you never told me.

What did you think
of the concierge medical care?

‐ [ blows air ] I never knew
what velvet handcuffs were before,

but now...
CLYDE: Right?

Once you taste luxury,
it's hard to go back.

‐ If the hoi polloi find out
about these places,

I'm putting all my savings
in guillotine futures.

‐ Pro tip. Invest in baskets.

‐ For the heads. Smart!

‐ Always think of the ancillary markets.
I learned that from Big Dick.

‐ You two... are an unlikely pair.

‐ Yeah. Well,
we can't all be Butch and Sundance, right?

‐ How did you two come to be?

‐ You want to hear the story?

‐ Ohh. Very much.

‐ You got somethin' to drink?

[ opens drawer ]

KEITH:
Will this do?

‐ Redemption 10 Year.
Yes, that will do very nicely.

‐ [ grunts ] Must be pretty boring
babysitting a congressman.

‐ "The life of the creative man is led,
directed and controlled by boredom."

Susan Sontag.

‐ You're a strange individual.

‐ Hm.

‐ So you're an active
naval intelligence officer?

Why aren't you somewhere more, uh...

‐ Dangerous than the presidential suite
at the Neptune Grand?

I'm gone for long stretches
and back for extended leave.

They're just never kind enough
to let me know

when those stretches are gonna happen.

‐ So how does that go over
with your girlfriend?

‐ Uh, truthfully, I don't know
if it helps us or harms us.

Two natural loners
and a 70‐pound dog

in a 600‐square‐foot apartment
is its own kind of challenge.

‐ Hey.

Why take this job
for which you're completely overqualified?

‐ May have overspent on a ring.

‐ Oh.

Ohh! [ laughs ]

I won't say a thing.

‐ Well, that's probably best.

[ phone chimes ]

‐ Uh, if you wanna‐‐

if you wanna head out,

I'm gonna stay in for the night.

‐ You won't be ordering room service?

‐ I appreciate your vigilance.

Good night, Logan.

[ door opens, closes ]

[ knocking on door ]

‐ You won't believe it.

What are you doin' comin' here?!
‐ I had to!

[ door closes ]

‐ I want to call it off.

Don't kill anyone.
Not for me.

[ screaming on phone video ]

‐ A day late
and $100,000 short, my friend.

DODIE:
This is from the congressman.

[ Tyler, Tayler screaming ]

‐ You bring the money?

VERONICA:
What is going on in there?

You got M&Ms in that jacket?

‐ Chocolate raisins?

‐ [ laughs ]
You're a human vending machine.

‐ Okay. Uh, yes? No?

Yeah.

[ both laugh ]

‐ Ya know, Liz‐‐

my‐‐ sh‐‐ that's my ex‐‐

she'd always give me a hard time
about being fully stocked.

Snacks, uh, may have
gone through the wash.

More than once.

‐ Is that why she left you?

‐ Why would you think
that she left me?

She left me.

[ both chuckle ]

‐ What happened?

‐ What happened.

We got married too soon.

It was in the madness of love,

the madness faded, as it does,

and neither of us
were happy with what we found.

How about you and Logan?

‐ What about me and Logan?

‐ Don't pretend like
you don't understand the question.

A‐‐ A woman well into her 30s...

‐ Ouch.

‐ ...has been with the same guy
for five straight years.

If marriage isn't the conversation
that you're having,

it's most certainly the conversation
that you're dancing around.

‐ We quite gracefully danced around it
until a couple weeks ago

when he poleaxed me by proposing.

‐ Uh... I don't see a ring,

so... I'm guessing‐‐

‐ You're goddamn right I said no!

And I don't even think
he wanted to get married.

He barely reacted to the rejection.

Made me think he just asked
so he could have the upper hand.

Like he wanted

to be able to wear
the "I love you more" pants.

‐ You ever consider

putting on the peace offering tank top?

‐ Me? Maybe he should put on

the "I defied
the well‐established boundaries

of our rock‐solid relationship"
hair shirt.

‐ All right. You know,

from the way that you've talked about him,

to be honest, I was expecting
someone different.

The hair‐trigger temper,
random acts of violence‐‐

what are‐‐ what are other things
that we expect

from a young Marlon Brando?

I don't like to use this term...

but I'll do it because
I'm in Southern California,

but your boy... seems chill.

‐ Bleaahh.

Yeah.
‐ [ laughing ]

‐ Uhh. All right, we're goin' in.
That's it.

They better not be playin' Twister.

‐ All right.

[ laughter, drunken chatter ]

‐ Yeah. Keith‐‐ [ clears throat ]

if I ever write my auto‐‐

my... ography,

I got the title. Here it is.

‐ What is it?
‐ It's‐‐ It's‐‐ It's‐‐

"It's" is the first word of the title.

"It's Hard to Find Good Help:
the Clyde Pickett Story."

‐ That is a good title.
‐ Right?

‐ Case in point: we're doin' this job,

a little savings & loan in Wallawa‐‐
whatever,

Oregon, and, uh,

I catch one of my boys
carryin' a grenade.

‐ No! No!
CLYDE: Yeah! Yeah!

And I say, "Kid, wh‐‐ why?!"
KEITH: "Why?"

‐ And he‐‐ he says, "Just in case."

‐ [ guffawing ]
‐ So at this point,

I know I'm gonna end up in jail.

KEITH: You're goin' down.
You're goin' down.

‐ Mm. Mm.

‐ Let me tell ya about a couple
of Darwin Award winners

that deputied for me‐‐

[ laughter continues ]

Number one daughter!

‐ Dad. You remember‐‐

‐ Leo!

Leo! Oh...

LEO:
Hey, Sheriff.

KEITH: Oh, Leo was one of my deputies.
One of the good ones.

‐ Now he works for the FBI.
LEO: Yeah.

KEITH:
Good for you, Leo.

Leo, Leo.

Leo, this is Clyde Pickett.
Clyde Pickett.

‐ Leo D'Amato, it's nice to meet you.

‐ Yeah. Fed, huh?

Is anybody in this town
not in law enforcement?

‐ [ Keith laughs ]
CLYDE: You're here on business, I assume?

‐ Yeah, still lookin' for Jimmy Hoffa.

‐ So, boys, you just doin'
some day drinking?

KEITH:
Whoa! Whoa whoa whoa whoa!

[ hinges clanking ]

‐ Here‐‐ No, I‐‐ I got it.

Thanks.
I think that's my cue to hit the road.

Thanks for the drink.

KEITH: Ohh. Okay.

Okay, let me know how it goes
with Ichiko.

Yeah, lovely Ichiko.

[ drunken laughter ]

‐ Dad...
KEITH: Yeah.

VERONICA: What the hell
is goin' on here?

Two old booze hounds
deep in the giggle juice,

bumpin' gums?

‐ I was doin' my job.

And what's with the fake‐aloo?
Our mark's no Jasper.

‐ We tailed our meat
from the hardware store.

Coulda been the same kind of nails
used as shrapnel in the bombs.

‐ But you came up dusty.

‐ I'm no bunny.
I knew it was a long shot.

‐ Okay.

I think I know
how you turned out like you did.

Sheriff Mars...

always a pleasure.

‐ Back atcha, Leo.

‐ Thanks for the company, Leo.
‐ Bye.

‐ Hmm.

‐ Are you still good
to hit the City Council meeting?

‐ There isn't a bottle of rye
that can hold me down.

‐ All the same, I think I'll drive.

So, assuming Dick
is still the big cheese,

what are we looking for tonight?

‐ He's gonna want to turn the screws.
‐ Yep.

BIG DICK: You see what happens
when we don't prune the vine.

Violence and death.

‐ [ crowd boos ]

MAYOR DOBBINS:
I'm sorry, Mr. Casablancas.

I may need a little help
with the metaphor.

I don't think I'm the only one.

BIG DICK:
It's simple, Mark.

Old Neptune, clean, decent,
respectable Neptune,

was the healthy fruit on tended vine.

‐ And Neptune now...?

‐ Rotten fruit... from an un tended vine.

Violence is the unintended consequence
of letting a town go to seed.

‐ What are we doing
about the bombs?

ALL: Yeah!

‐ I didn't find the analogy
at all hard to follow, Mr. Casablancas.

‐ Thank you.

‐ So you're saying this serial killer
that is terrorizing our town

is doing so because of
a lack of one‐way streets on the boardwalk

and neon signs taller than 12 feet?

‐ [ crowd laughs ]
‐ Smirk if you want,

but I predict that this will continue
if these measures are not passed.

‐ Dobbins just got my vote
in the next mayoral election.

‐ Veronica.

Hey.
VERONICA: Max!

Wow, hi! Long time.

MAX: Yeah.
‐ How are you?

‐ Screwed, actually,
if these measures get put into effect.

‐ Okay, I've made my point.

‐ [ applause and boos ]

‐ Keep fiddlin' while Rome burns!

‐ You own a business on the boardwalk.

‐ How, High Are You.

‐ Mm.
‐ I'm good. Name's Keith.

How are you?
‐ No, no, Dad.

He owns the dispensary
at Dickens and 3rd, How, High Are You.

‐ Ahh. How's clever workin' out?

‐ Right now not so good.

And just when you thought it was safe
to sell recreational marijuana.

‐ Well, good luck to ya.

‐ Are you gonna get up there and speak?

‐ You know, I spoke
to the other merchants,

and it was collectively decided
that the weed dealer going up there

wasn't putting our best foot forward,
so... yeah.

‐ Hey, did you know Sul?

PENN: [ clears throat ]
Hi, my name is Penn Epner.

You gain some clarity
when you barely escape death.

And you see people that you know
and care about die

feet from you.

I have a restless mind,

and when I'm not earning a living
as a undervalued working class shmo

in a town that doesn't want us around...
‐ [ shouts of ascent from crowd ]

PENN: I've been
digging into this crime.

‐ The focus here
is the Tidy Town measures.

We were discussing the bombs earlier.

‐ Right, well, let's get to it.

Vote no on NUTT.

DOBBINS: Okay‐‐
PENN: Vote no,

because the people that are pushing
these regulations

are trying to drive out the businesses

that own the valuable
boardwalk real estate.

They're responsible for the muggings!

They're responsible
for the vandalism!

And they're responsible
for the bombings

that are killing Neptune
as a spring break destination city!

‐ [ all yelling ]

‐ [ pounds gavel ]
Security!

Please remove the speaker.

‐ What is happening?

‐ Who exactly, do you ask?
Big Dick Casablancas,

and his right‐hand man Clyde Pickett!

‐ You little piece of shit!

‐ [ all yelling ]
DOBBINS: All right, given the chaos,

tonight's vote will be postponed.

BIG DICK: No! The measures have the votes!
Mark, call the vote!

You're gonna regret this!
Call the goddamn vote!

‐ Meeting's adjourned.

‐ You come here! Come here!

‐ You see these people!

‐ That cussing mothercusser. He‐‐

‐ Bugged our office.
I believe you're right.

[ buzzard screeches ]

[ music playing ]