Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:04,104 --> 00:00:06,206
The people who eat here
are animals.
2
00:00:06,238 --> 00:00:09,175
And not like those cute otters
holding hands.
3
00:00:09,208 --> 00:00:11,611
I hate em all.
4
00:00:11,644 --> 00:00:13,612
I went over to check
on a table and this man
5
00:00:13,646 --> 00:00:16,515
wiped gloppy short rib sauce
on my shirt.
6
00:00:16,548 --> 00:00:18,117
Do I look like a napkin?
7
00:00:18,150 --> 00:00:20,754
Well, you do now.
8
00:00:20,786 --> 00:00:24,724
And by the way, that "gloppy
sauce" is a port wine reduction,
9
00:00:24,757 --> 00:00:28,260
and intentionally viscous.
10
00:00:29,562 --> 00:00:31,564
Ugh.
11
00:00:31,597 --> 00:00:34,134
I came out here for fresh air,
but that dream is dead.
12
00:00:34,167 --> 00:00:36,735
Let me toss it on the pile
with all your others.
13
00:00:36,770 --> 00:00:38,804
I doubt you can throw that high.
14
00:00:38,838 --> 00:00:41,106
It sounds like you need
15
00:00:41,140 --> 00:00:43,243
a delicious
and calming cigarette.
16
00:00:43,276 --> 00:00:44,676
I don't smoke.
17
00:00:44,710 --> 00:00:47,514
In the words of the great
80s poet Adam Ant,
18
00:00:47,546 --> 00:00:49,848
"Dont drink, don't smoke,
what do you do?"
19
00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:56,155
Hey, dude, I used to smoke, I
used to drink, I used to strip,
20
00:00:56,189 --> 00:00:58,124
I used to not come home
for days at a time.
21
00:00:58,158 --> 00:01:00,426
Mm, so what youre saying
is you used to be fun.
22
00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:07,266
Fine. Give me one.
23
00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:15,074
24
00:01:19,846 --> 00:01:22,215
Oh, right.
25
00:01:24,617 --> 00:01:27,387
Thanks, I owe you one.
26
00:01:27,420 --> 00:01:29,855
Great. You want to come over
to my place after we close,
27
00:01:29,888 --> 00:01:31,724
"get chummy"?
28
00:01:31,757 --> 00:01:34,894
Its tobacco, not ecstasy.
29
00:01:34,927 --> 00:01:36,862
Would you like some ecstasy?
30
00:02:05,992 --> 00:02:07,960
Why do we bother putting
the damn chairs away?
31
00:02:07,993 --> 00:02:10,330
Were just gonna have
another meeting tomorrow.
32
00:02:10,362 --> 00:02:12,498
Theres ladies Zumba
in the morning.
33
00:02:12,532 --> 00:02:13,932
What is that,
like a Kegel thing?
34
00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:16,468
Tightening the old hoo-ha?
35
00:02:16,502 --> 00:02:18,872
Its a dance-based
exercise class,
36
00:02:18,905 --> 00:02:21,240
but your la-la
does get a workout.
37
00:02:21,274 --> 00:02:23,710
Guys, were all over 12.
38
00:02:23,742 --> 00:02:26,545
We can say "vagina."
39
00:02:26,579 --> 00:02:28,548
I did Zumba drunk once.
40
00:02:28,580 --> 00:02:30,550
Got kicked out.
41
00:02:30,582 --> 00:02:34,653
Maybe cause I kept
yelling "Zumba!"
42
00:02:34,687 --> 00:02:36,656
And I peed in my leotard.
43
00:02:39,359 --> 00:02:40,759
Oh, my God.
44
00:02:40,793 --> 00:02:41,927
What?
45
00:02:41,961 --> 00:02:43,496
I just got a text from this guy
46
00:02:43,530 --> 00:02:45,632
I met at The Home Depot
yesterday.
47
00:02:45,664 --> 00:02:47,834
Wait, like, "met a guy"
met a guy?
48
00:02:47,866 --> 00:02:49,968
You didn't tell me that. Spill.
49
00:02:50,002 --> 00:02:51,603
Well, he works there.
I needed to get a light switch,
50
00:02:51,638 --> 00:02:53,006
but I wasnt sure if I needed
51
00:02:53,038 --> 00:02:55,542
a 20-amp
or if a 15-amp would cover it.
52
00:02:55,574 --> 00:02:56,843
- So then I...
- Get to the man part.
53
00:02:56,876 --> 00:02:59,746
So Rick... thats what
his lifting belt said...
54
00:02:59,778 --> 00:03:01,447
swooped in and said even
55
00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:03,282
if I only needed a 15,
a 20 should be fine.
56
00:03:03,316 --> 00:03:04,751
And then he pushed you up
against the wall and kissed you.
57
00:03:04,783 --> 00:03:07,586
Sorry, I just got to make
the story better.
58
00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:09,389
He asked for my number,
I didn't think hed use it.
59
00:03:09,421 --> 00:03:11,591
Now he wants to know
"Whats up?"
60
00:03:11,623 --> 00:03:13,526
How do I even respond to that?
61
00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:16,562
How about "Nothing much,
whats up with you?"
62
00:03:16,596 --> 00:03:19,365
Are you nuts? You want
to sound busy, in demand.
63
00:03:19,399 --> 00:03:21,600
Tell him youre at a gala.
64
00:03:21,634 --> 00:03:23,603
No, wait.
You met him at Home Depot.
65
00:03:23,635 --> 00:03:25,337
Tell him youre at a county fair.
66
00:03:25,371 --> 00:03:27,372
Personally, I don't think
67
00:03:27,407 --> 00:03:29,341
you should start
a relationship off on a lie.
68
00:03:29,375 --> 00:03:30,509
Go with "not much."
69
00:03:34,514 --> 00:03:37,449
Oh, man, which tiny blonde
should I believe?
70
00:03:37,483 --> 00:03:40,652
Well, Christys my daughter
and I love her,
71
00:03:40,687 --> 00:03:42,688
but if you want any hope of
a romantic life, listen to Jill.
72
00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:44,723
"At a fair."
73
00:03:44,757 --> 00:03:46,626
Hey, I date.
74
00:03:46,658 --> 00:03:49,861
You do. Not recently,
but you do.
75
00:03:51,730 --> 00:03:53,800
Whoa, he texted back already.
76
00:03:53,832 --> 00:03:56,401
And he asked me out on a date!
"Anytime..."
77
00:03:56,436 --> 00:03:59,805
No, no, no. Youre eating funnel
cake at a fair, remember?
78
00:03:59,838 --> 00:04:01,507
Yeah, youre not just staring
79
00:04:01,540 --> 00:04:03,308
at your phone like
some kind of Christy.
80
00:04:03,342 --> 00:04:05,912
I don't do that.
81
00:04:05,944 --> 00:04:09,816
I blame myself. Its why Im
trying to do better with Tammy.
82
00:04:09,848 --> 00:04:10,917
Marjorie, everyones
picking on me.
83
00:04:10,918 --> 00:04:11,985
I know,
84
00:04:12,018 --> 00:04:14,987
and the fact that they're right
doesn't justify it.
85
00:04:15,021 --> 00:04:16,822
You know what?
86
00:04:16,855 --> 00:04:19,524
My homework
is more fun than this.
87
00:04:19,559 --> 00:04:21,894
And yeah, thats a dig, guys.
88
00:04:21,927 --> 00:04:24,896
Its a dig.
89
00:04:24,930 --> 00:04:26,331
So when do I text him back?
90
00:04:26,365 --> 00:04:27,600
I'll let you know.
91
00:04:31,838 --> 00:04:33,439
Sharon.
92
00:04:33,473 --> 00:04:34,406
Oh, hey, Christy.
93
00:04:34,439 --> 00:04:35,875
Can I bum one of those?
94
00:04:35,908 --> 00:04:37,976
Sure. I didn't know
you were a smoker.
95
00:04:38,011 --> 00:04:39,646
Only on Wednesdays.
96
00:04:39,678 --> 00:04:40,846
Its Thursday.
97
00:04:40,879 --> 00:04:42,581
Just light the cigarette,
Sharon.
98
00:04:46,084 --> 00:04:48,454
Thank you.
99
00:04:50,956 --> 00:04:52,692
Im just gonna go smoke this
behind that bush.
100
00:04:57,396 --> 00:04:59,531
I'll see you over there.
101
00:04:59,564 --> 00:05:00,833
Yeah.
102
00:05:07,540 --> 00:05:09,475
Now.
103
00:05:12,512 --> 00:05:14,447
Morons.
104
00:05:19,151 --> 00:05:21,586
Hi, can I have ten
dollars on pump three?
105
00:05:21,620 --> 00:05:22,754
You got it.
106
00:05:24,122 --> 00:05:25,925
Actually,
107
00:05:25,957 --> 00:05:27,660
can I have five dollars
on pump three
108
00:05:27,694 --> 00:05:29,095
and a pack of the lights?
109
00:05:29,127 --> 00:05:30,997
Those are nine dollars.
110
00:05:31,029 --> 00:05:33,132
Really? Wow.
111
00:05:35,735 --> 00:05:38,603
Okay, give me one dollar on pump
three and a pack of the lights.
112
00:05:52,884 --> 00:05:55,922
I don't like that Tammys date
is picking her up here.
113
00:05:55,954 --> 00:05:58,824
Now if hes a murderer,
he knows where she lives.
114
00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:00,860
Thats the third time
youve mentioned
115
00:06:00,892 --> 00:06:03,196
that she might
get killed on this date.
116
00:06:03,228 --> 00:06:05,865
Where is all this
murder anxiety coming from?
117
00:06:05,898 --> 00:06:08,201
From being a woman, Marjorie.
118
00:06:08,233 --> 00:06:09,802
Okay!
119
00:06:09,836 --> 00:06:13,139
Get ready. Tammy, come on out,
and show them what you got.
120
00:06:13,172 --> 00:06:15,641
Ooh!
Wow!
121
00:06:17,110 --> 00:06:20,846
I know, right?
Im a piece.
122
00:06:20,879 --> 00:06:24,483
Im so nervous, first date out
of prison, first date sober.
123
00:06:24,516 --> 00:06:26,619
Its just like going on a date
drunk, only much, much scarier.
124
00:06:26,651 --> 00:06:28,053
Cause youre a woman.
125
00:06:28,086 --> 00:06:29,956
Youll be great.
126
00:06:29,988 --> 00:06:31,891
What if he orders a cocktail
and asks me if I want one?
127
00:06:31,923 --> 00:06:33,225
What do I say then?
128
00:06:33,259 --> 00:06:34,927
You don't have to tell
your whole story.
129
00:06:34,961 --> 00:06:37,129
Just say you don't feel
like drinking tonight.
130
00:06:37,163 --> 00:06:38,697
Or tell him you cant drink
131
00:06:38,730 --> 00:06:39,899
cause youre taking antibiotics.
132
00:06:39,932 --> 00:06:41,800
How is that gonna work
if they keep dating?
133
00:06:41,834 --> 00:06:43,802
Yeah, then hell think
she has some horrible STD
134
00:06:43,836 --> 00:06:45,971
that Western medicine
just cant knock out.
135
00:06:46,004 --> 00:06:49,141
But he wont know shes sober.
136
00:06:49,175 --> 00:06:52,144
Maybe you should stop focusing
on whether hes gonna like you
137
00:06:52,177 --> 00:06:54,247
and see if you even like him.
138
00:06:54,279 --> 00:06:56,115
Youre Tammy frickin Diffendorf.
139
00:06:56,149 --> 00:06:58,016
You are beautiful and fierce
140
00:06:58,050 --> 00:07:00,252
and hes lucky
youre even going out with him.
141
00:07:00,286 --> 00:07:02,521
Wow!
142
00:07:02,555 --> 00:07:06,125
You guys just turned
my whole world around.
143
00:07:06,158 --> 00:07:09,762
I am going out on this date
with a blown mind.
144
00:07:09,795 --> 00:07:10,713
Hes pulling up.
145
00:07:10,714 --> 00:07:11,630
Its happening!
146
00:07:11,663 --> 00:07:12,848
Okay, when he knocks...
147
00:07:12,849 --> 00:07:14,033
Out of my way!
148
00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:22,709
Are we still worried about
149
00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:23,643
him,
150
00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:23,643
Wendy?
151
00:07:29,081 --> 00:07:31,117
Well, well, well.
152
00:07:33,819 --> 00:07:36,088
Look whos here
to bum another cigarette.
153
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:37,223
I have my own.
154
00:07:37,255 --> 00:07:40,058
Ooh, your own pack.
That was fast.
155
00:07:40,091 --> 00:07:42,661
I still only smoke
once in a while,
156
00:07:42,694 --> 00:07:44,262
I just don't want
to be seen as needy.
157
00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:46,264
Mm. I think with that voice
and those eyes,
158
00:07:46,298 --> 00:07:48,733
thats always gonna be a problem.
159
00:07:48,768 --> 00:07:50,903
I can take care of myself.
160
00:07:54,774 --> 00:07:56,209
Oh, Christy,
161
00:07:56,242 --> 00:07:57,677
face it.
162
00:07:57,709 --> 00:07:59,144
Youre a real smoker,
163
00:07:59,177 --> 00:08:02,682
and a real smoker should
have her own lighter.
164
00:08:02,714 --> 00:08:03,882
This was my fathers.
165
00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:08,053
And now its yours.
166
00:08:08,086 --> 00:08:09,754
Seriously?
167
00:08:09,788 --> 00:08:12,757
No, I got it from a busboy.
168
00:08:12,791 --> 00:08:14,209
Although it was
169
00:08:14,210 --> 00:08:15,627
his
170
00:08:12,791 --> 00:08:15,627
fathers.
171
00:08:18,163 --> 00:08:21,334
What started out
as dinner and a movie
172
00:08:21,367 --> 00:08:25,704
ended as dinner and a murder.
173
00:08:25,737 --> 00:08:27,874
Im getting scared.
174
00:08:27,906 --> 00:08:29,574
Marjorie, change the channel.
175
00:08:29,608 --> 00:08:31,810
Marjorie!
176
00:08:35,914 --> 00:08:36,816
Uh-oh.
177
00:08:38,384 --> 00:08:40,620
Uhp, there it is.
178
00:08:40,653 --> 00:08:43,990
What do you know,
I am gonna be sad when she goes.
179
00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:47,225
Tammys back.
180
00:08:47,259 --> 00:08:49,261
Best date ever.
181
00:08:49,294 --> 00:08:50,946
Really?
182
00:08:50,947 --> 00:08:52,597
Oh! Marjorie,
wake up, shes home.
183
00:08:52,631 --> 00:08:54,267
Im awake.
184
00:08:54,299 --> 00:08:57,202
Tell us everything.
185
00:08:57,235 --> 00:08:58,904
Well, Im so lucky
you guys dressed me up,
186
00:08:58,937 --> 00:09:02,774
because he took me
to Olive Garden.
187
00:09:02,807 --> 00:09:04,777
Okay, Ive been watching those
commercials for seven years
188
00:09:04,809 --> 00:09:07,947
from prison and if anything,
they undersell it.
189
00:09:07,980 --> 00:09:09,347
Whats he like?
190
00:09:09,381 --> 00:09:11,350
Oh, hes funny, hes smart...
191
00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:12,668
and get this, he doesn't drink.
192
00:09:12,669 --> 00:09:13,952
Is he an alcoholic?
193
00:09:13,985 --> 00:09:16,655
No, he has irritable
bowel syndrome.
194
00:09:16,688 --> 00:09:19,658
He sounds perfect.
195
00:09:19,692 --> 00:09:20,860
Doesnt he, Marjorie?
196
00:09:22,827 --> 00:09:25,630
Oh, Lord, lets at least
shut her mouth.
197
00:09:33,004 --> 00:09:34,874
Tape?
Anybody got any tape?
198
00:09:36,341 --> 00:09:38,009
Was there a good-night kiss?
199
00:09:38,043 --> 00:09:40,011
A lady doesn't kiss and tell,
200
00:09:40,046 --> 00:09:41,780
but Im no lady, so let me
tell you about the kissing.
201
00:09:41,813 --> 00:09:43,816
It was awesome!
202
00:09:43,849 --> 00:09:45,817
You know the kind of kiss
that leaves you light-headed?
203
00:09:45,850 --> 00:09:48,220
No.
204
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:50,923
Look at you... you went
on a date, you stayed sober,
205
00:09:50,956 --> 00:09:52,325
your clothes arent inside out.
206
00:09:52,357 --> 00:09:54,192
You didn't bring
any of their breadsticks home
207
00:09:54,225 --> 00:09:56,796
for your friend Bonnie,
but otherwise, a success.
208
00:09:56,828 --> 00:09:57,730
Thats what you think.
209
00:09:57,763 --> 00:09:59,197
What a night!
210
00:09:59,230 --> 00:10:01,067
I know!
211
00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:03,235
So when can I text him
to tell him I had fun?
212
00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:04,737
Never.
Wait for him to text you.
213
00:10:04,738 --> 00:10:06,205
But I want to.
214
00:10:06,238 --> 00:10:08,707
Go ahead. A little
"I had a good time" wont hurt.
215
00:10:08,740 --> 00:10:11,009
Theyre still warm.
216
00:10:11,043 --> 00:10:13,044
Thanks, Bonnie.
"Had a nice time.
217
00:10:13,078 --> 00:10:14,679
Cant wait to see you again."
218
00:10:14,714 --> 00:10:15,847
I guess thats okay.
219
00:10:15,880 --> 00:10:17,015
"I think youre the one."
220
00:10:17,048 --> 00:10:18,083
No! No! No!
221
00:10:19,884 --> 00:10:21,886
Oh. Howd it go?
222
00:10:39,471 --> 00:10:41,374
Hi, Jill.
223
00:10:41,407 --> 00:10:46,077
Im almost there,
driving as fast as I can.
224
00:10:46,111 --> 00:10:47,312
Bye.
225
00:11:38,397 --> 00:11:39,932
That was easy.
226
00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:44,769
Im starving.
Can we please order?
227
00:11:44,803 --> 00:11:45,937
Arent we gonna wait for Christy?
228
00:11:45,971 --> 00:11:48,407
No, cause I get rude
when Im hangry.
229
00:11:48,441 --> 00:11:50,009
Were ready, were ready!
230
00:11:50,042 --> 00:11:52,812
Oh, I am so gonna get her fired.
231
00:11:52,845 --> 00:11:54,879
Why isnt Rick texting me back?
232
00:11:54,913 --> 00:11:56,081
Im gonna text him again.
233
00:11:56,115 --> 00:11:57,249
Tammy, I wouldnt.
234
00:11:57,283 --> 00:12:00,086
You texted him four times
in the car on the way over here.
235
00:12:00,119 --> 00:12:01,486
How do I put this gently?
236
00:12:01,519 --> 00:12:03,188
Thats something
Christy would do.
237
00:12:03,221 --> 00:12:04,823
I just really like him,
238
00:12:04,856 --> 00:12:06,491
and I havent liked
anyone in a long time.
239
00:12:06,524 --> 00:12:08,561
Which is great,
but just take it slow.
240
00:12:08,594 --> 00:12:11,029
Food!
241
00:12:11,062 --> 00:12:12,932
I think I have some
almonds in my purse.
242
00:12:14,332 --> 00:12:16,402
No.
243
00:12:16,434 --> 00:12:19,871
Maybe my phone is broken.
Will you just text me?
244
00:12:19,904 --> 00:12:21,539
No, youre obsessed
with this guy.
245
00:12:21,573 --> 00:12:23,808
"This guy"? His name
is Rick something
246
00:12:23,842 --> 00:12:25,845
and he means a lot to me.
247
00:12:25,878 --> 00:12:28,047
Hi, guys. Sorry Im late.
248
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:31,951
Traffic. What is
happening to Napa?
249
00:12:31,984 --> 00:12:33,818
Have you been smoking?
250
00:12:33,852 --> 00:12:35,488
Why would you ask me that?
251
00:12:35,520 --> 00:12:37,822
Because you smell like
mouth wash, air freshener,
252
00:12:37,856 --> 00:12:39,991
Purell and dryer sheets.
253
00:12:40,024 --> 00:12:42,027
Its like sitting next to
a freshly cleaned motel room.
254
00:12:42,061 --> 00:12:45,530
Im not smoking.
Did we order yet?
255
00:12:45,563 --> 00:12:47,866
No, cause this is hell.
256
00:12:47,899 --> 00:12:50,568
Why do you have a lighter?
257
00:12:50,602 --> 00:12:52,238
Why are you going
through my purse?
258
00:12:52,270 --> 00:12:53,222
Im your mother.
259
00:12:53,223 --> 00:12:54,173
What does that
have to do with it?
260
00:12:54,206 --> 00:12:57,109
You came out of my pocketbook,
I get to rifle through yours.
261
00:12:59,979 --> 00:13:04,048
Okay, yes, Im smoking,
262
00:13:04,082 --> 00:13:06,284
but Im not drinking,
Im not gambling,
263
00:13:06,317 --> 00:13:07,586
Im not sleeping
with married men.
264
00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:09,187
Let me have this.
265
00:13:09,221 --> 00:13:11,157
Its him!
266
00:13:11,190 --> 00:13:13,558
Shoot, Amber Alert.
267
00:13:13,591 --> 00:13:17,428
White pickup, Utah plates.
Keep your eyes open.
268
00:13:17,462 --> 00:13:20,099
Tammy, stop with the phone.
Youre driving yourself crazy.
269
00:13:20,131 --> 00:13:22,600
Youre driving us all crazy.
Youre acting pathetic.
270
00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:29,240
Not him, but, yes, Wendy,
Bonnie was a little harsh.
271
00:13:32,177 --> 00:13:34,613
Not out loud. You trying
to get me killed?
272
00:13:38,149 --> 00:13:40,885
Hi, Id like to make
an order for delivery.
273
00:13:40,919 --> 00:13:43,556
Yeah, my address is the booth
with the woman waving.
274
00:13:58,403 --> 00:14:00,004
Yeah?
275
00:14:00,038 --> 00:14:03,509
Hey, Bonnie, whats happening?
276
00:14:03,542 --> 00:14:05,543
What is happening?
277
00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:10,249
You gals talking about Zumba
278
00:14:10,282 --> 00:14:13,552
inspired me to get out
my old Jazzercise tapes.
279
00:14:13,586 --> 00:14:17,990
Theres a lot to mock here,
but I need your advice.
280
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:19,524
This thing with Tammy
is driving me...
281
00:14:21,025 --> 00:14:23,596
Okay, we need to lose this.
282
00:14:23,629 --> 00:14:25,597
I just don't know what to do.
283
00:14:25,630 --> 00:14:27,700
Shes gonna get her heart broken
and Im worried about her.
284
00:14:27,732 --> 00:14:29,969
What?
285
00:14:30,001 --> 00:14:32,136
Im taking a moment to enjoy
286
00:14:32,171 --> 00:14:34,472
that youre worrying about
somebody other than yourself.
287
00:14:35,740 --> 00:14:37,142
Youve really changed.
288
00:14:37,176 --> 00:14:39,544
Oh. Thank you.
289
00:14:39,577 --> 00:14:43,615
You can have this back.
Its actually kind of wet.
290
00:14:43,649 --> 00:14:45,985
Okay, heres the deal,
291
00:14:46,018 --> 00:14:47,086
I know whats best for Tammy.
292
00:14:47,119 --> 00:14:49,153
How do I get her
to listen to me?
293
00:14:49,187 --> 00:14:51,389
You don't know whats best
for her, Bonnie.
294
00:14:51,423 --> 00:14:53,658
She has to have
her own experiences.
295
00:14:53,692 --> 00:14:57,328
The only thing you can do
is share yours, if she asks.
296
00:14:57,363 --> 00:14:58,181
But shes not asking.
297
00:14:58,182 --> 00:14:58,998
Well, then shut up.
298
00:14:59,030 --> 00:15:02,000
You shut up.
299
00:15:02,033 --> 00:15:04,003
Sorry, you were saying?
300
00:15:04,035 --> 00:15:06,004
You know, when you
started dating Adam,
301
00:15:06,038 --> 00:15:08,039
I thought you were
making a big mistake.
302
00:15:08,072 --> 00:15:09,508
Whats wrong with Adam?
303
00:15:09,541 --> 00:15:12,043
Well, I just didn't like him,
304
00:15:12,076 --> 00:15:13,511
and I didn't think
you were ready,
305
00:15:13,544 --> 00:15:15,346
but you proved me wrong
because you are
306
00:15:15,380 --> 00:15:17,750
handling this relationship
so beautifully.
307
00:15:17,783 --> 00:15:22,086
Thank you. What exactly
didn't you like about him?
308
00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:26,191
Well, he had a certain swagger
I didn't appreciate,
309
00:15:26,225 --> 00:15:29,561
and apparently, before you,
he was a bit of a tomcat.
310
00:15:29,595 --> 00:15:34,066
"Swagger"? Thats a great way
to put it. So arrogant.
311
00:15:34,099 --> 00:15:36,034
My point is, I was wrong.
312
00:15:36,067 --> 00:15:37,469
Im not sure you were.
313
00:15:37,503 --> 00:15:39,270
Were running into
ex-girlfriends all the time.
314
00:15:39,304 --> 00:15:40,172
Bonnie, listen...
315
00:15:40,173 --> 00:15:41,039
Williams-Sonoma,
316
00:15:41,072 --> 00:15:43,509
I am buying nice plates
for the first time in my life,
317
00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:44,777
and whos wrapping them up?
318
00:15:44,809 --> 00:15:47,178
Jaqueline with her big,
fake fingernails.
319
00:15:48,379 --> 00:15:50,182
Why didn't you
tell me this back then?
320
00:15:50,215 --> 00:15:53,251
You didn't ask for my opinion,
321
00:15:53,284 --> 00:15:55,421
like Tammy hasnt
asked for yours.
322
00:15:55,453 --> 00:15:57,690
Fine, fine, got it.
323
00:15:57,722 --> 00:16:01,259
Okay. Now if you don't mind,
324
00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:03,328
I would like to go back
to Jazzercise.
325
00:16:03,361 --> 00:16:05,397
Would you like to join me?
326
00:16:05,431 --> 00:16:09,500
I would not, but I
definitely want to watch.
327
00:16:21,447 --> 00:16:22,815
Hi.
328
00:16:22,847 --> 00:16:24,032
Hi.
329
00:16:24,033 --> 00:16:25,216
You okay?
330
00:16:25,250 --> 00:16:28,253
Uh, yeah, I just pulled
a muscle Jazzercising.
331
00:16:30,288 --> 00:16:32,624
By the way, your ass
appears to be on fire.
332
00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:37,162
Fine, caught me.
Cue the lecture.
333
00:16:37,196 --> 00:16:38,297
No lecture.
334
00:16:38,330 --> 00:16:39,530
Oh, come on, you don't think
335
00:16:39,565 --> 00:16:40,665
this is self-destructive
behavior?
336
00:16:40,698 --> 00:16:42,334
Oh, honey,
337
00:16:42,368 --> 00:16:45,537
I get it. I went
through the whole
338
00:16:45,571 --> 00:16:48,506
"finding ways to be naughty
in sobriety" thing.
339
00:16:48,539 --> 00:16:52,277
In fact, when I had
about five years,
340
00:16:52,311 --> 00:16:55,080
I developed a massive
crush on Marvin,
341
00:16:55,114 --> 00:16:57,216
the guy that I had
the coffee commitment with.
342
00:16:57,249 --> 00:16:58,116
Ooh.
343
00:16:58,149 --> 00:17:01,854
No, not "ooh."
He was married and so was I.
344
00:17:01,886 --> 00:17:04,423
Ooh.
Yeah.
345
00:17:04,455 --> 00:17:06,825
All we did was flirt, but...
346
00:17:06,858 --> 00:17:09,161
it did give me a thrill,
347
00:17:09,193 --> 00:17:11,396
and at the time,
I really needed that.
348
00:17:11,430 --> 00:17:13,164
So what happened?
349
00:17:13,198 --> 00:17:15,401
Oh, I kept working
the program, and so did he,
350
00:17:15,433 --> 00:17:19,238
and we got better
and the flirting stopped.
351
00:17:19,270 --> 00:17:22,240
Also, one night
he wore a denim vest.
352
00:17:24,509 --> 00:17:27,346
Well, my Marvin and I
are still flirting.
353
00:17:27,378 --> 00:17:31,083
Okay.
I'll see you inside.
354
00:17:36,555 --> 00:17:39,124
What was I trying to prove?
355
00:17:46,865 --> 00:17:49,367
Hi, Bonnie.
356
00:17:49,401 --> 00:17:52,438
Hi, Tammy.
357
00:17:52,471 --> 00:17:55,874
Im calling cause
I owe you an apology.
358
00:17:55,907 --> 00:17:57,675
I was too hard on you.
359
00:17:57,709 --> 00:17:58,810
Youre not pathetic
360
00:17:58,844 --> 00:18:02,314
and I was wrong to say
you were obsessing about Rick.
361
00:18:02,346 --> 00:18:05,683
Thanks, Big Sauce, that means
a lot. Youre forgiven.
362
00:18:05,717 --> 00:18:08,319
Good. So what are you up to?
363
00:18:08,353 --> 00:18:10,288
Im sitting across the street
from Ricks house.
364
00:18:13,325 --> 00:18:14,526
Are you?
365
00:18:14,559 --> 00:18:17,395
And I may have binoculars.
366
00:18:17,429 --> 00:18:19,397
Uh-huh.
367
00:18:19,431 --> 00:18:21,767
Am I as crazy as I feel?
368
00:18:21,799 --> 00:18:23,084
Are you asking my opinion?
369
00:18:23,085 --> 00:18:24,368
I am.
370
00:18:26,404 --> 00:18:28,507
Where are you exactly?
371
00:18:33,278 --> 00:18:35,547
You took an Uber to stalk a guy?
372
00:18:35,580 --> 00:18:37,449
You know I don't drive.
373
00:18:37,482 --> 00:18:39,001
Bonnie, Yuri. Yuri, Bonnie.
374
00:18:39,002 --> 00:18:40,519
Good evening.
375
00:18:40,551 --> 00:18:42,421
Uh, would you like to have
mint, water, phone charger?
376
00:18:42,453 --> 00:18:43,422
Im fine.
377
00:18:43,454 --> 00:18:46,825
Why are you doing this?
Eh, as long as Im here.
378
00:18:46,858 --> 00:18:48,292
I still hadnt heard from Rick,
379
00:18:48,326 --> 00:18:49,961
so I went to Home Depot
to say hi,
380
00:18:49,994 --> 00:18:52,463
and he walks away and says
he has to do something
381
00:18:52,498 --> 00:18:54,532
in aisle three, so I
follow him to aisle three
382
00:18:54,566 --> 00:18:56,401
and hes not doing anything.
So I say to him,
383
00:18:56,434 --> 00:18:57,669
"Youre not doing anything,"
384
00:18:57,702 --> 00:18:59,538
and he says,
"I cant talk right now.
385
00:18:59,570 --> 00:19:01,707
I'll call you later
when I get home."
386
00:19:01,740 --> 00:19:05,243
Six hours go by, no call,
so I came to see if hes home.
387
00:19:05,277 --> 00:19:07,445
Hes home!
388
00:19:07,479 --> 00:19:10,414
He can clearly be seen
eating pizza in his boxers.
389
00:19:10,449 --> 00:19:11,884
So what do I do?
390
00:19:11,916 --> 00:19:14,720
In my experience,
391
00:19:14,752 --> 00:19:17,689
if a guy would rather
eat alone in his underwear,
392
00:19:17,722 --> 00:19:19,557
hes not interested.
393
00:19:19,590 --> 00:19:21,993
I know.
You do?
394
00:19:22,027 --> 00:19:25,263
I just didn't want
to admit it to myself.
395
00:19:25,297 --> 00:19:28,666
Tissues are in pocket
in front of you.
396
00:19:28,700 --> 00:19:31,369
Im gonna be single
the rest of my life.
397
00:19:31,403 --> 00:19:34,405
No, youre not.
I have done way worse than this.
398
00:19:34,439 --> 00:19:36,275
Sitting outside his house?
399
00:19:36,307 --> 00:19:37,342
Try moving into his attic
400
00:19:37,375 --> 00:19:38,777
without him knowing
for three weeks.
401
00:19:38,809 --> 00:19:40,778
You didn't really do that.
402
00:19:40,811 --> 00:19:43,347
Sure did. There was a website
warning people about me.
403
00:19:45,284 --> 00:19:46,684
But now Im getting married,
404
00:19:46,718 --> 00:19:48,720
and Im not as crazy
as I used to be,
405
00:19:48,753 --> 00:19:51,490
and I found a guy who loves
the crazy thats still there.
406
00:19:51,522 --> 00:19:52,958
Youre gonna learn from this,
and next time,
407
00:19:52,990 --> 00:19:54,393
youll do it differently.
408
00:19:54,425 --> 00:19:56,461
If there ever is a next time.
409
00:19:56,494 --> 00:19:58,797
It may not happen right away,
but it will happen.
410
00:20:02,366 --> 00:20:03,902
I think youve waited
long enough.
411
00:20:03,935 --> 00:20:07,705
May I take you
for dinner sometime?
412
00:20:07,739 --> 00:20:11,442
Id love that. Lets go now!
Bonnie, out!
413
00:20:11,476 --> 00:20:12,644
Hey, can we go to Olive Garden?
414
00:20:12,645 --> 00:20:13,811
No problem.
415
00:20:27,726 --> 00:20:30,528
You don't do anything
halfway, do you?
416
00:20:30,561 --> 00:20:32,730
Are you gonna smoke with me
or just judge?
417
00:20:32,763 --> 00:20:34,215
No, thanks, I quit.
418
00:20:34,216 --> 00:20:35,666
How?
419
00:20:35,701 --> 00:20:38,971
I just stopped.
Its called having character.
420
00:20:39,003 --> 00:20:40,806
Have fun out here.
421
00:20:40,838 --> 00:20:43,008
I will!
422
00:20:50,648 --> 00:20:53,451
Oh...
423
00:20:53,484 --> 00:20:55,086
Oh, come on!
424
00:20:55,119 --> 00:20:56,954
Captioning sponsored by CBS
425
00:20:56,989 --> 00:20:58,990
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
425
00:20:59,305 --> 00:21:05,919
Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org
30215
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
