All language subtitles for The Durrells - 03x02 - Episode 2.-ORGANiC.English.updated.Addic7ed.com

How do you split up
nicely from a girlfriend?

- You've only just got together.
- Not Dionisia, Daphne.

- Daphne still thinks we're going steady.
- You be you, I'm Daphne.

- Do it.
- I thought you wanted to write.

- I'm stuck. I've given up for the day.
- It's 7.50am.

Hello, Leslie. I love you so much.

Thank you. I'm very fond of
you, but I prefer another girl.

Again, but not trying to get a slap.

I... I would love you back,

Daphne, but I can't love anyone...

- since my accident.
- That's just... creepy.

Write her a letter.

Mrs Durrells!

Your aunty left this in my
car. I don't know what it is.

- It must be English.
- Thank you, Spiros.

England, it seems so far away
with its... whatever this is.

- Hello, Gerry. Where are you off to?
- To stare at a wall.

Spiros, would you mind taking
this to Daphne Likourgou's house?

- Of course.
- I'm splitting up with Daphne,

because I'm with Dionisia
now. Me and the girl I love.

Being honest and happy, for ever.

- Will you tell him it's not that easy?
- It's not that easy.

- Herete!
- Herete!

Hello.

Hello.

- Why are we staring at a wall?
- It's alive.

Is it?

I'm not known for my
arithmetic but I calculate

there are 20,000 living
beings on this wall.

- Nineteen thousand, nine hundred and
ninety nine... - Ah, but over here...

New birth.

And so it goes, around and around.

The whirligig of time.

Yes.

How do they stick to the wall?

We think it's tiny claws with
adhesive hairs called tarsi,

helped by the insects' minuscule weight.

- Not working? - I've been writing about
sex for weeks. It's very draining.

Talking of which, you need to speak
to Leslie about contraception.

I have. What kind of a
mother do you think I am?

The kind who used so many
euphemisms he was none the wiser.

I do remember saying "protection"
a lot and him looking confused.

- He may have thought I was talking about guns.
- I have French letters,

- I'll talk him through it, how you
roll them on, and so on. - Stop.

It's my job, I'll do it my way.

- Hello, darling.
- Just off to see Dionisia.

Yes. Exactly.

What?

We should talk about life,
and... and how it starts.

- Or doesn't. - No, we're not doing
the bloody birds and the bees.

Yes, but there are mechanical aspects

that I fear I explained poorly.

I'm happy to buy some...

equipment so that...

bees are prevented.

Margo.

- Hello, Zoltan. - I am sad without
you. Why did you reject me?

I am handsome and wealthy
and have many talents.

- You see, you've rather summed up
what's wrong with you. - I am...

- too superb?
- No, you're arrogant and smug.

I had no idea!

I'm sure I mentioned it
when I finished with you.

You haven't asked how I am,

- or anything. - How are you,
and everything? - Very well.

I have a job I love in the new
X-ray unit at Dr Petridis'.

- I would be a superb doctor.
- You don't realise how you sound, do you?

- Please be mine again.
- No.

Hello, dear. I'm doing a tour
of my cherished great-nephews

before I doze.

Auntie, I'm flagging.

Inspire me with your views
on sex in the 20th century.

I may have learned to
relax and enjoy life, dear,

but I'm still a Victorian.

All I would say is don't neglect
us elders in your writing.

We are humanity's depots of wisdom.

We are its Pyramids and its Parthenon.

- You are. - But if you
ever describe us as sprightly

I'll ask Leslie to shoot you.

- You are beautiful.
- Say again.

- You are beautiful.
- Say again.

You.

One girlfriend.

- Only.
- I promise.

- Me.
- Of course you.

I'm sorry, before I was greedy.

Now I'm just greedy for you.

Oh.

Herete. How can I help you?

- I am the father of Daphne.
- Ah.

Yes, I'm sorry it didn't work out.

Daphne's very special. Lovely hair.

- We must talk.
- Must we?

Or shall we just let them
put it down to experience?

Obviously not.

Cup of tea, Auntie?

Pre-luncheon ouzo?

No.

Humanity's depot of wisdom...

no more.

I know it's sad, but,
well, they're so young.

Especially Leslie. And he
can be an absolute horror.

He's been arrested twice.

- Daphne's well rid of him.
- He has made my daughter pregnant.

Er, he can't have.

So this is rather late.

Leslie, what have you done?

I expect him to, as you say, "do
the decent thing" and marry Daphne.

We will talk more.

This is really bad timing, but...

She looks so...

strong and calm.

Why do people have to die?

Sorry, what am I, eight?

Let's hope it wasn't our cooking.

Aunt Hermione.

You see? This is why I wanted to be a nun.

To make sense of all this.

- The corpse is in the box.
- Yes, thank you.

- Beautifully put.
- We speak soon about money.

I'm so sorry, Mother.

I know.

But, er, I'm afraid...

something equally momentous has happened.

Daphne's father paid us a visit.

Daphne's having your baby.

- No, she isn't.
- Why are you so sure?

Because we didn't, you know.

You didn't sleep with Daphne?

No, well, I did, but only once.

- Well, one and a half times.
- Once is enough.

Leslie, what do you mean "a half"?

- Well, there was this...
- It doesn't matter.

You were in a pram
yourself only yesterday.

In your little shorts.

Are you taking this in, Leslie?

Or do I have to spell out all the
consequences and the... the mess?

- No. Life will go on.
- And what about poor Daphne?

How will it go on for her?

Do you love her?

No.

Oh.

That's the best way to go.

Slipping into oblivion to
the lilt of rippling waves.

Aunt Margo...

Auntie Margo.

Uncle Gerry.

Your Uncle Gerald.

Here's... Unc!

Are we not allowed to talk about it?

Not being mean, but it seems a bit soon.

Well, of course it's too soon.
It's ten years too soon.

Let's linger with my aunt for the moment.

I can't believe she's gone.

We should mark her leaving
with a big gesture,

kicking Death in the arse.

What did she love most?

- Lamb.
- Lambs?

No, lamb.

Goat's a bit like lamb, with mint sauce.

In her honour we could slay the
one that's stopped giving milk.

How does it honour someone
to slay a living creature?

Back off, vegetarian. You spend all
day watching bugs kill each other.

- But they do it to survive.
- I like the idea. Very Druid.

We should do it ourselves.

Right.

I'm going up. I've made
your bed up, Margo.

No, I don't fancy
sleeping where Auntie died.

I'll stay on the sofa tonight.

Gerry, it's not good for your eyes.

No, I think it is.

Oh. Er, maybe it is.

It's all you ever do is
stare at this bloody thing.

This is my favourite gecko.

Aren't they all the same?

Ooh, excuse me.

He's called Geronimo.

How do you know? Because you called
him that. Yes, I'm very tired.

I didn't sleep very well. I
kept seeing my aunt's face.

How do the insects stay on the wall?

Tiny claws with sticky hairs.

Hm.

Oh, look away.

Maybe I should try drowning you.

Look, this is a noble sacrifice.

We eat you, so you become
flesh with the Durrell family,

which is a privilege.

Oh.

No.

Argh! No!

- Fetch a doctor!
- No, not after your bogus broken leg.

My typing thumb is on the
ground! Well, the tip of it.

- How's the goat?
- The goat is an irrelevance!

Oh!

Kalimera.

Kalimera, gracious lady.

The dead auntie is in the cellar.

You certainly have all the phrases.

- She is lying with a young man.
- Company. That's nice.

No. He fell in a machine. His head is off.

- Auntie was on holiday?
- She planned to live here,

- but was only given a few days.
- Too bad.

- My aunt is being embalmed
for the journey home? - Yes.

- Who will go with her?
- Well, I assumed she'd go alone.

- I do not advise it.
- Why not?

We have lost bodies in transit.

It looks like you're off to England.

Please bring me back some Marmite.

Margot, baby duty, while I help lance

Mr Tombros' plague of boils.

Another of my dreams comes true.

Well done, again. Tiny bit irritating.

And I have a patient for you. An
old beau says he needs an X-ray.

Zoltan, do you honestly expect me
to believe you've hurt your arm?

Yes. I was bravely rescuing
a kitten... No, not bravely.

Averagely rescuing it, for
I am not an arrogant man.

Hello, we met when you two
were stepping out together.

Ah, yes, the happy time.

Hello.

I fear I have broken
my arm. Kitten accident.

It's an excuse to meet me.

That would be a bad waste of our time
and money, which are in short supply.

I'll pay 100 drachma for my treatment.

Go on, then.

Stand over here, slip off your shirt.

Geronimo doesn't bother
eating ladybirds or gnats,

he waits for the lacewing flies
or the big prize: the mantids.

Mm, tasty.

Cicely.

Why do you give them names?

We give names to whoever we love.
Geronimo has his eye on Cicely.

How do they not fall off the wall?

Suction.

None of us has been
back since we came here.

I love you being here, but I think
you should go back to England

- for the funeral.
- Ooh, I'm coming too.

- You always say you hate England.
- It might be more fun

now that I've got some mad
friends through my novel.

Anyway, I'm writing bollocks
here. I'll send some telegrams

- to alert the literati.
- I don't know bollocks. What is that?

I should go back, but I'm
worried about Leslie.

I feel like my head is being
battered between two bricks.

What are we going to do?

It may turn out well.

I married my wife after
she was with child.

And you've no regrets, have you?

No.

I'm sure there's a rational explanation.

I don't care. I'm not moving back in.

- Leslie, swap rooms with your sister.
- No, it's too spooky.

- Larry can swap.
- No, I work in my room. It's sacred.

This is a message. Aunt
Hermione's soul is restless.

We need an exorcism.

No, no more paranormal
crap, after Mrs Haddock.

I do think we might have a
memorial service for her, though.

As Auntie loved Corfu so much.
And then we'll take her home.

- Margo, you're the most spiritual.
- Yes, I am.

So you arrange it.

~

Yes, but...

~

Please don't look at me like that.

Shhh. Try to think of Auntie.

Well, you took it really well.

- You took your time coming here.
- Yes. I'm sorry, Mr Likourgos.

- Hello.
- Cuppa?

- Ooh, yes.
- ~

- You speak very good English.
- I fought with British Tommies

- in the Great War. Battle of Doiran.
- Well done.

- We lost.
- Ah. Thank you, anyway.

- My aunt died so I'm actually
popping back to England. - Blighty.

- Indeed.
- She snuffed her candle.

Hm.

- Daphne, this must be
such a jolt for you. - Yes.

Leslie's not speaking.

- Well, he's coming to terms
with it, too. Aren't you? - Yes.

I'm going to speak for Leslie
because... he's not saying anything.

We should not make any decisions now.

- It's rude to stare. - It's rude to
put my daughter in the pudding club.

- They will marry before the baby
shows. We want no shame. - No.

I will shoot him with my army
rifle if you do not agree.

- Good marriages aren't made at the
point of a gun. - What kind of rifle?

- Now you talk. - Lee-Enfield.
- What, the classic point 303 or the...

This is the gun he is threatening
to kill you with, Leslie.

- Good morning.
- Morning, Zoltan.

- You forgot your sling.
- Hm.

Superb recovery!

Margo, you are looking more
beautiful with every passing day.

It's not true. I slept terribly.

- Why? - I'm on the
sofa. My bed is haunted.

- Who by?
- My great aunt.

Oh.

A souvenir.

I look forward to seeing
you with a genuine injury.

I apologise. I am a twit.

You see, not arrogant.

I am the least arrogant
person in the world.

Well, that's quite arrogant.

Oh, yes. I have much to learn from you.

- I tell you what you
can do for me. - Hm?

Slaughter a goat.

How did that go?

- I didn't realise shotgun weddings
actually existed, till now. - Oh, dear.

Leslie's obviously deeply traumatised.

I'd rather he got hysterical
than this... blankness.

The cicada are hatching.

Darling, ask Leslie to join you at
the wall. It might distract him.

You know what I'm wondering?

Whether Daphne really is pregnant.

This will interest you: a cicada.

They stay underground for up to
17 years then emerge as nymphs.

So the opposite of me: above ground
for 19 years then buried alive.

- How do they stay on the...
- Please don't say it!

You won't organise anything too
outlandish tomorrow, will you?

We will be drawing on many cultures.

We're already sacrificing a goat.

That would raise a few
eyebrows in Bournemouth.

In Madagascar they remember the
dead by regularly digging them up.

Well, let's remember Aunt
Hermione just by remembering her.

Sleep in your bed tonight, darling.

I'm sure Auntie's spirit is at rest.

- Hello, Daddy. Daphne
on your mind? - Mm.

I'm all for go to bed
together first, chat later,

but just ignoring this
problem won't make it go away.

I'm seeing her tomorrow, so we can
"get to know each other better".

- Also, I've read a lot of books...
- Bravo, have a banana.

Thanks, and there are many
examples of phantom pregnancies

or simple wishful thinking from women,

especially if they've
been dumped by the father.

- Are you saying Daphne isn't pregnant?
- It's possible.

Why didn't say when you
two were going out?

- I'd love her not to be
having a baby. - I know.

- Your brain has told your face.
- But Daphne wouldn't lie.

She told me she loves me.
I just wish I loved her.

- Maybe you'll ease into it. - Like
tight shoes. - Exactly like that.

Morning.

Bit of a surprise, all this.

We were stupid. Everyone is looking at me.

Still -- one and a half
times, call it two.

What are the chances?

This may sound bad, but you
are really having a baby,

aren't you?

So you've missed your thing.

Stop. You cannot talk about this.

I'm not saying that you're lying,
but shouldn't we go to a doctor,

just to check that you're
well and everything?

- Pavlos, thank you so much for helping.
- It is a pleasure.

'The day of one's death is better
than the day of one's birth.'

Ecclesiastes 7:1.

You may struggle to find
anyone who agrees with you.

- This is not a Nativity.
- I know, Pavlos, I told him.

- Auntie loved donkeys.
- I'm not sure she did.

This is the schedule of events.

I've encouraged everyone to contribute.

I am not unwell.

I know, but the doc can give us advice.

And confirm if you're pregnant or not.

- That's very bad form.
- Leslie! And, er,... - Daphne.

~

- There's a queue, I'm afraid, I'm
without Florence. - Where is she?

At your great aunt's memorial service.

I really should be there, too, Daphne.

I'm sorry. Do you mind? I'll be back.

Eonia sou e mnimi, axiomakaristi
ke aimnisti athelfi Hermioni.

♪ Eonia sou e mnimi,

♪ Eonia sou e mnimi,

♪ Eonia aftis e mnimi.

O Theos as tin anapafsi.

We will now sing Aunt
Hermione's favourite song,

Three Little Maids From School.

♪ Three little maids from school are we

♪ Pert as a schoolgirl well can be

♪ Filled to the brim with girlish glee

♪ Three little maids from school

♪ Everything is a source of fun

♪ Nobody's safe... ♪

Keep singing.

- Oh! - Your dead auntie is
outside. Shall I wheel her in?

Thank you, no. Let's not treat
her like a portable cabaret act.

We'll move on. Larry?

Sorry.

Friends and relatives of
Hermione, local people,

monks, animals.

To quote the poet Emily Dickinson...

Do give her a try, she's very good.

'Dying is a wild night and a new road.'

Aunt Hermione is on that road now,

and as someone who's been in the
car with her, God help the driver.

Like us, Hermione was rejuvenated by
this ramshackled but magical island.

Maybe her heart couldn't take
what she called "surge of bliss".

The Hawaiian lament known as the karooki.

It's in my book about
death. Let's all try it now.

All right, we won't, then,
but you get the gist.

- I recently became a vegetarian. - Boo.

So that cuts down on a lot of deaths,

but it's never easy when it strikes.

I cried buckets when my
first pet died. Stinky.

- Stinky. - Stinky. - Stinky.

Hermione was, of course, very English.

I think the reason she was
acquiring so many admirers on Corfu

was the same quality of robustness
which built the British Empire.

My sympathy lies with Mr Anestis here.

- Thank you.
- You brought out her sensual side

which -- I speak as a single person --

one may neglect if one is...

rather busy.

Everyone's been sweet about my aunt

and I spent most of my
life in fear of her.

How fitting that she drew her
last mortal breath here in Corfu,

where she learnt to relax and forgive,

and to dance despite what
she called "foolish knees".

She felt at home here,
and I say amen to that.

Amen.

I've recently become very aware
of the cycle of life and death.

The old must make way for the new.

And those of us in-between must
welcome and be friends to both.

I'm so sorry. It went on for ages.

The doctor says yes, I'm pregnant.

Do you want to go check
with him I'm not lying?

- I didn't think you were lying.
- Liar.

- All right, but it was my brother's
stupid idea. - Liar and now coward.

- I've been upset.
- And me?

Did you see me doing happy skipping?

And if I was happy you wouldn't
know, because you're not interested.

Look, I've just been
managing not to go to pieces.

I could not kill this,
even for the love of Margo.

Oh, you poor thing.

It's just as well --
this is the wrong goat.

- Oh.
- Zoltan.

- That's the wrong goat.
- I know!

Sorry, I have been informed.

It's so lovely you're just as weedy as us.

Zoltan, you should know,
we British love a loser.

Thanks a bunch. Of course she's
pregnant. You read too many books.

Grrrr!

Looks like your auntie's ready to go home.

- I did a bad thing.
- Well, you're not the first.

Not that bad thing, another bad thing.

I asked Daphne to go
to the doctor's with me,

to check she WAS pregnant.

She's pretty angry with me.

Daphne's a decent girl. You
need to treat her well.

I know.

Sometimes, people who are
thrown together thrive.

The choice isn't will you abandon
Daphne and the baby, or not?

- Of course I won't.
- The choice is will you marry Daphne?

And only you can decide that.

Which is tragic, because I'd love
to decide everything for you.

- She is huge. Spectacular tegmina!
- I'm so glad you're here.

I wanted my family to share my
interest, but it's exhausting.

Ooh, I think it's finally happening.

- Who's your money on?
- You'd be a fool to bet against Geronimo.

- You'd be a fool to bet ever.
- Of course.

- Should we separate them?
- Too late.

That was horrible.

- Hello.
- Hello.

~

I'm sorry, I've been hopeless.

I want to do everything properly now.

- ~
- ~

Agree to marry my daughter.

No.

A marriage needs love and I'm
afraid I'm not in love with Daphne.

So you'll have to shoot me now
if you can't live with that.

But I will be a reliable support
to Daphne, and a good father.

My family will provide for the baby.

I did actually deliver a
baby last year by myself.

Another time.

- Daphne, let's talk.
- Ella!

One new bed!

A present from your Turkish friend.

Zoltan bought me a new bed,
because the other one was haunted.

- No, it wasn't. - What? - I made
the shape on the bed by lying on it.

You were asking for it by saying
you "believe in everything".

That's no way to live. Believe in truth.

She got a free bed out of it.

How's Daphne?

She used to be so strong.

Now she's all cowed.

- So?
- It's all right.

We'll be apart.

But it's not all right.

I've tried to shut it all out
-- I hate bloody explaining --

because I don't want a baby.

I know. Come here.

I just feel so trapped,
like I can't go back.

Nothing's ever been so...
so permanent before.

I'm not ready to be a parent.

If it makes you feel any better,
I'm not ready to be a grandparent.

Or to take over from Aunt Hermione.

- I found a terrific ditch.
- Margo, no!

Ha! What are you going to sleep on now?

Why are there mattresses everywhere?

These are your papers, Mrs Durrell.

- If they seize the corpse...
- I'm sorry,

but you are rather
tactless for an undertaker.

- Can we use another word, please?
- Carcass?

This is very important.

Read the list properly,
like it's Keats or something.

Don't buy the wrong fishnet
stockings. Thank you.

Now, just don't drown in the ditch.

- I'm sorry about my advice.
- No, I've been weird.

I just want to say, whatever happens...

- I really need this ammo,...
- Oh.

.. and there are a dozen
specific gun magazines.

Please look after my
children while I'm away.

They suddenly seem very vulnerable.

I would love to.

And what can I bring you
back from England, Spiros?

Yourself.

Come on, Auntie.

One last trip.

- Bye.
- Bye, Mum.

Larry, this is, er, Jonquil,
Henry Miller, and Ruby.

At last. People like me.

The house is buggered.

Your mother asked me to watch over you.

- No Zoltan until she returns. So you
have not seen him. - Of course not.

- Be kind to donkeys!
- Come to my room.

- Why? - I've got a job
with the Corfu police force!

I want to stay here in England.