Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:14,820 --> 00:00:17,890
How do you split up
nicely from a girlfriend?
2
00:00:17,940 --> 00:00:21,190
- You've only just got together.
- Not Dionisia, Daphne.
3
00:00:21,240 --> 00:00:25,070
- Daphne still thinks we're going steady.
- You be you, I'm Daphne.
4
00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:27,020
- Do it.
- I thought you wanted to write.
5
00:00:27,070 --> 00:00:30,750
- I'm stuck. I've given up for the day.
- It's 7.50am.
6
00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:34,320
Hello, Leslie. I love you so much.
7
00:00:38,880 --> 00:00:43,200
Thank you. I'm very fond of
you, but I prefer another girl.
8
00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:48,360
Again, but not trying to get a slap.
9
00:00:51,300 --> 00:00:52,770
I... I would love you back,
10
00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:57,440
Daphne, but I can't love anyone...
11
00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:02,750
- since my accident.
- That's just... creepy.
12
00:01:02,800 --> 00:01:05,160
Write her a letter.
13
00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:12,280
Mrs Durrells!
14
00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:17,110
Your aunty left this in my
car. I don't know what it is.
15
00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:19,950
- It must be English.
- Thank you, Spiros.
16
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:24,350
England, it seems so far away
with its... whatever this is.
17
00:01:24,400 --> 00:01:28,120
- Hello, Gerry. Where are you off to?
- To stare at a wall.
18
00:01:29,760 --> 00:01:33,760
Spiros, would you mind taking
this to Daphne Likourgou's house?
19
00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:37,870
- Of course.
- I'm splitting up with Daphne,
20
00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:41,630
because I'm with Dionisia
now. Me and the girl I love.
21
00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:44,070
Being honest and happy, for ever.
22
00:01:44,120 --> 00:01:47,840
- Will you tell him it's not that easy?
- It's not that easy.
23
00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:56,360
- Herete!
- Herete!
24
00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:31,920
Hello.
25
00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:34,520
Hello.
26
00:03:36,040 --> 00:03:38,760
- Why are we staring at a wall?
- It's alive.
27
00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:41,320
Is it?
28
00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:44,430
I'm not known for my
arithmetic but I calculate
29
00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:47,640
there are 20,000 living
beings on this wall.
30
00:03:56,840 --> 00:04:02,360
- Nineteen thousand, nine hundred and
ninety nine... - Ah, but over here...
31
00:04:03,840 --> 00:04:05,800
New birth.
32
00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:12,390
And so it goes, around and around.
33
00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:14,680
The whirligig of time.
34
00:04:15,720 --> 00:04:17,350
Yes.
35
00:04:17,400 --> 00:04:19,950
How do they stick to the wall?
36
00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:24,150
We think it's tiny claws with
adhesive hairs called tarsi,
37
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:27,200
helped by the insects' minuscule weight.
38
00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:37,310
- Not working? - I've been writing about
sex for weeks. It's very draining.
39
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:41,310
Talking of which, you need to speak
to Leslie about contraception.
40
00:04:41,360 --> 00:04:44,230
I have. What kind of a
mother do you think I am?
41
00:04:44,280 --> 00:04:47,750
The kind who used so many
euphemisms he was none the wiser.
42
00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:51,430
I do remember saying "protection"
a lot and him looking confused.
43
00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:55,230
- He may have thought I was talking about guns.
- I have French letters,
44
00:04:55,280 --> 00:04:59,190
- I'll talk him through it, how you
roll them on, and so on. - Stop.
45
00:04:59,240 --> 00:05:01,520
It's my job, I'll do it my way.
46
00:05:03,760 --> 00:05:07,430
- Hello, darling.
- Just off to see Dionisia.
47
00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:09,670
Yes. Exactly.
48
00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:11,440
What?
49
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:17,030
We should talk about life,
and... and how it starts.
50
00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:20,710
- Or doesn't. - No, we're not doing
the bloody birds and the bees.
51
00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:24,550
Yes, but there are mechanical aspects
52
00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:28,240
that I fear I explained poorly.
53
00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:32,400
I'm happy to buy some...
54
00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:37,760
equipment so that...
55
00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:40,560
bees are prevented.
56
00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:49,150
Margo.
57
00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:53,040
- Hello, Zoltan. - I am sad without
you. Why did you reject me?
58
00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:56,710
I am handsome and wealthy
and have many talents.
59
00:05:56,760 --> 00:06:00,350
- You see, you've rather summed up
what's wrong with you. - I am...
60
00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:03,470
- too superb?
- No, you're arrogant and smug.
61
00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:05,670
I had no idea!
62
00:06:05,720 --> 00:06:08,550
I'm sure I mentioned it
when I finished with you.
63
00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:10,430
You haven't asked how I am,
64
00:06:10,480 --> 00:06:13,590
- or anything. - How are you,
and everything? - Very well.
65
00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:17,670
I have a job I love in the new
X-ray unit at Dr Petridis'.
66
00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:21,800
- I would be a superb doctor.
- You don't realise how you sound, do you?
67
00:06:24,040 --> 00:06:26,240
- Please be mine again.
- No.
68
00:06:41,240 --> 00:06:44,510
Hello, dear. I'm doing a tour
of my cherished great-nephews
69
00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:46,550
before I doze.
70
00:06:46,600 --> 00:06:49,030
Auntie, I'm flagging.
71
00:06:49,080 --> 00:06:52,390
Inspire me with your views
on sex in the 20th century.
72
00:06:52,440 --> 00:06:56,030
I may have learned to
relax and enjoy life, dear,
73
00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:58,310
but I'm still a Victorian.
74
00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:01,590
All I would say is don't neglect
us elders in your writing.
75
00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:05,430
We are humanity's depots of wisdom.
76
00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:08,070
We are its Pyramids and its Parthenon.
77
00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:12,760
- You are. - But if you
ever describe us as sprightly
78
00:07:13,760 --> 00:07:16,320
I'll ask Leslie to shoot you.
79
00:07:27,840 --> 00:07:30,160
- You are beautiful.
- Say again.
80
00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:32,880
- You are beautiful.
- Say again.
81
00:07:34,520 --> 00:07:36,310
You.
82
00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:38,360
One girlfriend.
83
00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:41,120
- Only.
- I promise.
84
00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:44,160
- Me.
- Of course you.
85
00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:46,960
I'm sorry, before I was greedy.
86
00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:50,560
Now I'm just greedy for you.
87
00:07:58,880 --> 00:08:00,790
Oh.
88
00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:02,870
Herete. How can I help you?
89
00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:05,440
- I am the father of Daphne.
- Ah.
90
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:09,190
Yes, I'm sorry it didn't work out.
91
00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:12,000
Daphne's very special. Lovely hair.
92
00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:15,070
- We must talk.
- Must we?
93
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:18,510
Or shall we just let them
put it down to experience?
94
00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:20,600
Obviously not.
95
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:25,160
Cup of tea, Auntie?
96
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:28,000
Pre-luncheon ouzo?
97
00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:44,520
No.
98
00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:05,760
Humanity's depot of wisdom...
99
00:09:07,560 --> 00:09:09,480
no more.
100
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:14,190
I know it's sad, but,
well, they're so young.
101
00:09:14,240 --> 00:09:17,950
Especially Leslie. And he
can be an absolute horror.
102
00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:20,470
He's been arrested twice.
103
00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:23,920
- Daphne's well rid of him.
- He has made my daughter pregnant.
104
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:27,280
Er, he can't have.
105
00:09:27,440 --> 00:09:29,640
So this is rather late.
106
00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:33,880
Leslie, what have you done?
107
00:09:35,680 --> 00:09:39,360
I expect him to, as you say, "do
the decent thing" and marry Daphne.
108
00:09:41,560 --> 00:09:43,560
We will talk more.
109
00:09:49,320 --> 00:09:52,760
This is really bad timing, but...
110
00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:09,480
She looks so...
111
00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:12,840
strong and calm.
112
00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:21,760
Why do people have to die?
113
00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:25,590
Sorry, what am I, eight?
114
00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:36,920
Let's hope it wasn't our cooking.
115
00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:05,750
Aunt Hermione.
116
00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:08,670
You see? This is why I wanted to be a nun.
117
00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:10,720
To make sense of all this.
118
00:11:11,160 --> 00:11:14,240
- The corpse is in the box.
- Yes, thank you.
119
00:11:15,120 --> 00:11:18,480
- Beautifully put.
- We speak soon about money.
120
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:27,800
I'm so sorry, Mother.
121
00:11:29,560 --> 00:11:30,440
I know.
122
00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:42,470
But, er, I'm afraid...
123
00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:45,840
something equally momentous has happened.
124
00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:49,240
Daphne's father paid us a visit.
125
00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:54,880
Daphne's having your baby.
126
00:11:56,840 --> 00:11:59,110
- No, she isn't.
- Why are you so sure?
127
00:11:59,160 --> 00:12:01,800
Because we didn't, you know.
128
00:12:03,280 --> 00:12:05,550
You didn't sleep with Daphne?
129
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:07,790
No, well, I did, but only once.
130
00:12:07,840 --> 00:12:11,110
- Well, one and a half times.
- Once is enough.
131
00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:13,510
Leslie, what do you mean "a half"?
132
00:12:13,560 --> 00:12:15,560
- Well, there was this...
- It doesn't matter.
133
00:12:17,980 --> 00:12:20,600
You were in a pram
yourself only yesterday.
134
00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:23,800
In your little shorts.
135
00:12:25,720 --> 00:12:28,030
Are you taking this in, Leslie?
136
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:32,150
Or do I have to spell out all the
consequences and the... the mess?
137
00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:35,470
- No. Life will go on.
- And what about poor Daphne?
138
00:12:35,520 --> 00:12:37,540
How will it go on for her?
139
00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:42,340
Do you love her?
140
00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:44,280
No.
141
00:12:47,440 --> 00:12:48,160
Oh.
142
00:12:58,860 --> 00:13:00,890
That's the best way to go.
143
00:13:00,940 --> 00:13:05,100
Slipping into oblivion to
the lilt of rippling waves.
144
00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:07,660
Aunt Margo...
145
00:13:08,500 --> 00:13:10,300
Auntie Margo.
146
00:13:10,580 --> 00:13:12,580
Uncle Gerry.
147
00:13:13,100 --> 00:13:15,250
Your Uncle Gerald.
148
00:13:15,300 --> 00:13:17,300
Here's... Unc!
149
00:13:19,700 --> 00:13:22,010
Are we not allowed to talk about it?
150
00:13:22,060 --> 00:13:25,850
Not being mean, but it seems a bit soon.
151
00:13:25,900 --> 00:13:29,700
Well, of course it's too soon.
It's ten years too soon.
152
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:35,780
Let's linger with my aunt for the moment.
153
00:13:36,380 --> 00:13:38,490
I can't believe she's gone.
154
00:13:38,540 --> 00:13:40,850
We should mark her leaving
with a big gesture,
155
00:13:40,900 --> 00:13:43,620
kicking Death in the arse.
156
00:13:46,660 --> 00:13:48,660
What did she love most?
157
00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:51,970
- Lamb.
- Lambs?
158
00:13:52,020 --> 00:13:54,330
No, lamb.
159
00:13:54,380 --> 00:13:57,690
Goat's a bit like lamb, with mint sauce.
160
00:13:57,740 --> 00:14:01,250
In her honour we could slay the
one that's stopped giving milk.
161
00:14:01,300 --> 00:14:04,650
How does it honour someone
to slay a living creature?
162
00:14:04,700 --> 00:14:08,730
Back off, vegetarian. You spend all
day watching bugs kill each other.
163
00:14:08,780 --> 00:14:11,970
- But they do it to survive.
- I like the idea. Very Druid.
164
00:14:12,020 --> 00:14:14,740
We should do it ourselves.
165
00:14:15,060 --> 00:14:16,690
Right.
166
00:14:16,740 --> 00:14:19,250
I'm going up. I've made
your bed up, Margo.
167
00:14:19,300 --> 00:14:22,730
No, I don't fancy
sleeping where Auntie died.
168
00:14:22,780 --> 00:14:24,940
I'll stay on the sofa tonight.
169
00:14:47,460 --> 00:14:50,090
Gerry, it's not good for your eyes.
170
00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:52,180
No, I think it is.
171
00:14:52,660 --> 00:14:55,780
Oh. Er, maybe it is.
172
00:14:56,540 --> 00:15:00,020
It's all you ever do is
stare at this bloody thing.
173
00:15:01,100 --> 00:15:03,490
This is my favourite gecko.
174
00:15:03,540 --> 00:15:05,660
Aren't they all the same?
175
00:15:05,980 --> 00:15:08,290
Ooh, excuse me.
176
00:15:08,340 --> 00:15:10,530
He's called Geronimo.
177
00:15:10,580 --> 00:15:15,140
How do you know? Because you called
him that. Yes, I'm very tired.
178
00:15:15,740 --> 00:15:19,340
I didn't sleep very well. I
kept seeing my aunt's face.
179
00:15:25,420 --> 00:15:28,170
How do the insects stay on the wall?
180
00:15:28,220 --> 00:15:30,450
Tiny claws with sticky hairs.
181
00:15:30,500 --> 00:15:32,140
Hm.
182
00:15:36,660 --> 00:15:38,740
Oh, look away.
183
00:15:40,060 --> 00:15:41,740
Maybe I should try drowning you.
184
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:46,260
Look, this is a noble sacrifice.
185
00:15:46,580 --> 00:15:50,010
We eat you, so you become
flesh with the Durrell family,
186
00:15:50,060 --> 00:15:52,620
which is a privilege.
187
00:15:52,980 --> 00:15:54,700
Oh.
188
00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:02,690
No.
189
00:16:17,460 --> 00:16:19,080
Argh! No!
190
00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:24,650
- Fetch a doctor!
- No, not after your bogus broken leg.
191
00:16:24,700 --> 00:16:28,330
My typing thumb is on the
ground! Well, the tip of it.
192
00:16:28,780 --> 00:16:31,930
- How's the goat?
- The goat is an irrelevance!
193
00:16:31,980 --> 00:16:32,720
Oh!
194
00:16:41,820 --> 00:16:43,490
Kalimera.
195
00:16:43,540 --> 00:16:45,650
Kalimera, gracious lady.
196
00:16:45,700 --> 00:16:47,690
The dead auntie is in the cellar.
197
00:16:47,740 --> 00:16:50,130
You certainly have all the phrases.
198
00:16:50,180 --> 00:16:53,570
- She is lying with a young man.
- Company. That's nice.
199
00:16:53,620 --> 00:16:56,900
No. He fell in a machine. His head is off.
200
00:16:58,660 --> 00:17:01,650
- Auntie was on holiday?
- She planned to live here,
201
00:17:01,700 --> 00:17:05,330
- but was only given a few days.
- Too bad.
202
00:17:05,380 --> 00:17:09,330
- My aunt is being embalmed
for the journey home? - Yes.
203
00:17:09,380 --> 00:17:13,250
- Who will go with her?
- Well, I assumed she'd go alone.
204
00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:15,690
- I do not advise it.
- Why not?
205
00:17:15,740 --> 00:17:18,020
We have lost bodies in transit.
206
00:17:20,100 --> 00:17:22,530
It looks like you're off to England.
207
00:17:22,580 --> 00:17:25,140
Please bring me back some Marmite.
208
00:17:29,260 --> 00:17:32,050
Margot, baby duty, while I help lance
209
00:17:32,100 --> 00:17:34,450
Mr Tombros' plague of boils.
210
00:17:34,500 --> 00:17:36,100
Another of my dreams comes true.
211
00:17:39,220 --> 00:17:41,770
Well done, again. Tiny bit irritating.
212
00:17:41,820 --> 00:17:46,700
And I have a patient for you. An
old beau says he needs an X-ray.
213
00:17:48,820 --> 00:17:52,810
Zoltan, do you honestly expect me
to believe you've hurt your arm?
214
00:17:52,860 --> 00:17:56,850
Yes. I was bravely rescuing
a kitten... No, not bravely.
215
00:17:56,900 --> 00:18:00,450
Averagely rescuing it, for
I am not an arrogant man.
216
00:18:00,500 --> 00:18:04,010
Hello, we met when you two
were stepping out together.
217
00:18:04,060 --> 00:18:06,770
Ah, yes, the happy time.
218
00:18:06,820 --> 00:18:08,450
Hello.
219
00:18:08,500 --> 00:18:13,010
I fear I have broken
my arm. Kitten accident.
220
00:18:13,060 --> 00:18:15,010
It's an excuse to meet me.
221
00:18:15,060 --> 00:18:19,450
That would be a bad waste of our time
and money, which are in short supply.
222
00:18:19,500 --> 00:18:22,180
I'll pay 100 drachma for my treatment.
223
00:18:26,540 --> 00:18:28,730
Go on, then.
224
00:18:28,780 --> 00:18:31,340
Stand over here, slip off your shirt.
225
00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:42,530
Geronimo doesn't bother
eating ladybirds or gnats,
226
00:18:42,580 --> 00:18:46,450
he waits for the lacewing flies
or the big prize: the mantids.
227
00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:48,500
Mm, tasty.
228
00:18:48,780 --> 00:18:50,690
Cicely.
229
00:18:50,740 --> 00:18:52,730
Why do you give them names?
230
00:18:52,780 --> 00:18:57,580
We give names to whoever we love.
Geronimo has his eye on Cicely.
231
00:18:58,460 --> 00:19:00,570
How do they not fall off the wall?
232
00:19:00,620 --> 00:19:02,260
Suction.
233
00:19:12,660 --> 00:19:15,700
None of us has been
back since we came here.
234
00:19:17,940 --> 00:19:21,770
I love you being here, but I think
you should go back to England
235
00:19:21,820 --> 00:19:24,450
- for the funeral.
- Ooh, I'm coming too.
236
00:19:24,500 --> 00:19:27,570
- You always say you hate England.
- It might be more fun
237
00:19:27,620 --> 00:19:30,650
now that I've got some mad
friends through my novel.
238
00:19:30,700 --> 00:19:33,970
Anyway, I'm writing bollocks
here. I'll send some telegrams
239
00:19:34,020 --> 00:19:37,490
- to alert the literati.
- I don't know bollocks. What is that?
240
00:19:37,540 --> 00:19:40,410
I should go back, but I'm
worried about Leslie.
241
00:19:40,460 --> 00:19:44,460
I feel like my head is being
battered between two bricks.
242
00:19:45,980 --> 00:19:47,160
What are we going to do?
243
00:19:49,660 --> 00:19:51,700
It may turn out well.
244
00:19:52,340 --> 00:19:55,370
I married my wife after
she was with child.
245
00:19:55,420 --> 00:19:57,930
And you've no regrets, have you?
246
00:19:57,980 --> 00:19:59,740
No.
247
00:20:31,340 --> 00:20:34,090
I'm sure there's a rational explanation.
248
00:20:34,140 --> 00:20:36,650
I don't care. I'm not moving back in.
249
00:20:36,700 --> 00:20:40,530
- Leslie, swap rooms with your sister.
- No, it's too spooky.
250
00:20:40,580 --> 00:20:43,570
- Larry can swap.
- No, I work in my room. It's sacred.
251
00:20:43,620 --> 00:20:47,730
This is a message. Aunt
Hermione's soul is restless.
252
00:20:47,780 --> 00:20:49,930
We need an exorcism.
253
00:20:49,980 --> 00:20:54,370
No, no more paranormal
crap, after Mrs Haddock.
254
00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:57,770
I do think we might have a
memorial service for her, though.
255
00:20:57,820 --> 00:21:01,810
As Auntie loved Corfu so much.
And then we'll take her home.
256
00:21:01,860 --> 00:21:04,850
- Margo, you're the most spiritual.
- Yes, I am.
257
00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:07,060
So you arrange it.
258
00:21:29,980 --> 00:21:31,980
~
259
00:21:33,180 --> 00:21:34,950
Yes, but...
260
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:35,900
~
261
00:22:13,840 --> 00:22:15,440
Please don't look at me like that.
262
00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:41,080
Shhh. Try to think of Auntie.
263
00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:46,680
Well, you took it really well.
264
00:23:07,160 --> 00:23:11,680
- You took your time coming here.
- Yes. I'm sorry, Mr Likourgos.
265
00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:15,030
- Hello.
- Cuppa?
266
00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:17,680
- Ooh, yes.
- ~
267
00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:24,150
- You speak very good English.
- I fought with British Tommies
268
00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:26,670
- in the Great War. Battle of Doiran.
- Well done.
269
00:23:26,720 --> 00:23:29,960
- We lost.
- Ah. Thank you, anyway.
270
00:23:32,080 --> 00:23:36,270
- My aunt died so I'm actually
popping back to England. - Blighty.
271
00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:38,670
- Indeed.
- She snuffed her candle.
272
00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:41,230
Hm.
273
00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:44,710
- Daphne, this must be
such a jolt for you. - Yes.
274
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:47,000
Leslie's not speaking.
275
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:52,000
- Well, he's coming to terms
with it, too. Aren't you? - Yes.
276
00:23:53,720 --> 00:23:57,710
I'm going to speak for Leslie
because... he's not saying anything.
277
00:23:57,760 --> 00:24:00,960
We should not make any decisions now.
278
00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:06,040
- It's rude to stare. - It's rude to
put my daughter in the pudding club.
279
00:24:07,560 --> 00:24:11,150
- They will marry before the baby
shows. We want no shame. - No.
280
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:14,270
I will shoot him with my army
rifle if you do not agree.
281
00:24:14,320 --> 00:24:18,430
- Good marriages aren't made at the
point of a gun. - What kind of rifle?
282
00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:23,110
- Now you talk. - Lee-Enfield.
- What, the classic point 303 or the...
283
00:24:23,160 --> 00:24:27,080
This is the gun he is threatening
to kill you with, Leslie.
284
00:24:30,120 --> 00:24:32,310
- Good morning.
- Morning, Zoltan.
285
00:24:32,360 --> 00:24:34,870
- You forgot your sling.
- Hm.
286
00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:37,350
Superb recovery!
287
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:41,550
Margo, you are looking more
beautiful with every passing day.
288
00:24:41,600 --> 00:24:43,870
It's not true. I slept terribly.
289
00:24:43,920 --> 00:24:47,590
- Why? - I'm on the
sofa. My bed is haunted.
290
00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:50,110
- Who by?
- My great aunt.
291
00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:51,880
Oh.
292
00:24:52,280 --> 00:24:54,070
A souvenir.
293
00:24:54,120 --> 00:24:58,920
I look forward to seeing
you with a genuine injury.
294
00:24:59,320 --> 00:25:01,320
I apologise. I am a twit.
295
00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:04,870
You see, not arrogant.
296
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:07,430
I am the least arrogant
person in the world.
297
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:10,350
Well, that's quite arrogant.
298
00:25:10,900 --> 00:25:13,670
Oh, yes. I have much to learn from you.
299
00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:16,470
- I tell you what you
can do for me. - Hm?
300
00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:18,680
Slaughter a goat.
301
00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:40,870
How did that go?
302
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:45,070
- I didn't realise shotgun weddings
actually existed, till now. - Oh, dear.
303
00:25:45,120 --> 00:25:48,030
Leslie's obviously deeply traumatised.
304
00:25:48,080 --> 00:25:52,190
I'd rather he got hysterical
than this... blankness.
305
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:54,270
The cicada are hatching.
306
00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:58,040
Darling, ask Leslie to join you at
the wall. It might distract him.
307
00:26:02,120 --> 00:26:04,270
You know what I'm wondering?
308
00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:07,040
Whether Daphne really is pregnant.
309
00:26:14,060 --> 00:26:16,320
This will interest you: a cicada.
310
00:26:17,160 --> 00:26:20,990
They stay underground for up to
17 years then emerge as nymphs.
311
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:25,160
So the opposite of me: above ground
for 19 years then buried alive.
312
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:31,120
- How do they stay on the...
- Please don't say it!
313
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:46,670
You won't organise anything too
outlandish tomorrow, will you?
314
00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:49,150
We will be drawing on many cultures.
315
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:51,750
We're already sacrificing a goat.
316
00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:54,550
That would raise a few
eyebrows in Bournemouth.
317
00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:58,790
In Madagascar they remember the
dead by regularly digging them up.
318
00:26:58,840 --> 00:27:02,640
Well, let's remember Aunt
Hermione just by remembering her.
319
00:27:05,340 --> 00:27:07,350
Sleep in your bed tonight, darling.
320
00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:10,360
I'm sure Auntie's spirit is at rest.
321
00:27:51,440 --> 00:27:54,400
- Hello, Daddy. Daphne
on your mind? - Mm.
322
00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:58,510
I'm all for go to bed
together first, chat later,
323
00:27:58,560 --> 00:28:02,240
but just ignoring this
problem won't make it go away.
324
00:28:06,680 --> 00:28:10,720
I'm seeing her tomorrow, so we can
"get to know each other better".
325
00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:16,510
- Also, I've read a lot of books...
- Bravo, have a banana.
326
00:28:16,560 --> 00:28:19,950
Thanks, and there are many
examples of phantom pregnancies
327
00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:22,630
or simple wishful thinking from women,
328
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:25,470
especially if they've
been dumped by the father.
329
00:28:25,520 --> 00:28:28,710
- Are you saying Daphne isn't pregnant?
- It's possible.
330
00:28:28,760 --> 00:28:31,870
Why didn't say when you
two were going out?
331
00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:34,870
- I'd love her not to be
having a baby. - I know.
332
00:28:34,920 --> 00:28:38,350
- Your brain has told your face.
- But Daphne wouldn't lie.
333
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:41,670
She told me she loves me.
I just wish I loved her.
334
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:45,720
- Maybe you'll ease into it. - Like
tight shoes. - Exactly like that.
335
00:28:58,240 --> 00:28:59,960
Morning.
336
00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:09,240
Bit of a surprise, all this.
337
00:29:10,200 --> 00:29:12,990
We were stupid. Everyone is looking at me.
338
00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:17,680
Still -- one and a half
times, call it two.
339
00:29:18,680 --> 00:29:20,680
What are the chances?
340
00:29:22,520 --> 00:29:27,950
This may sound bad, but you
are really having a baby,
341
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:29,990
aren't you?
342
00:29:30,040 --> 00:29:32,270
So you've missed your thing.
343
00:29:32,320 --> 00:29:34,630
Stop. You cannot talk about this.
344
00:29:34,680 --> 00:29:38,630
I'm not saying that you're lying,
but shouldn't we go to a doctor,
345
00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:42,040
just to check that you're
well and everything?
346
00:29:49,440 --> 00:29:52,990
- Pavlos, thank you so much for helping.
- It is a pleasure.
347
00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:57,430
'The day of one's death is better
than the day of one's birth.'
348
00:29:57,480 --> 00:29:59,550
Ecclesiastes 7:1.
349
00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:03,120
You may struggle to find
anyone who agrees with you.
350
00:30:03,760 --> 00:30:06,990
- This is not a Nativity.
- I know, Pavlos, I told him.
351
00:30:07,040 --> 00:30:09,870
- Auntie loved donkeys.
- I'm not sure she did.
352
00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:12,150
This is the schedule of events.
353
00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:15,400
I've encouraged everyone to contribute.
354
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:22,950
I am not unwell.
355
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:25,390
I know, but the doc can give us advice.
356
00:30:25,440 --> 00:30:27,460
And confirm if you're pregnant or not.
357
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:36,310
- That's very bad form.
- Leslie! And, er,... - Daphne.
358
00:30:36,360 --> 00:30:38,860
~
359
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:42,390
- There's a queue, I'm afraid, I'm
without Florence. - Where is she?
360
00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:45,640
At your great aunt's memorial service.
361
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:49,590
I really should be there, too, Daphne.
362
00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:52,240
I'm sorry. Do you mind? I'll be back.
363
00:30:56,240 --> 00:31:01,310
Eonia sou e mnimi, axiomakaristi
ke aimnisti athelfi Hermioni.
364
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:06,950
♪ Eonia sou e mnimi,
365
00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:11,030
♪ Eonia sou e mnimi,
366
00:31:11,080 --> 00:31:15,710
♪ Eonia aftis e mnimi.
367
00:31:15,760 --> 00:31:18,440
O Theos as tin anapafsi.
368
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:23,990
We will now sing Aunt
Hermione's favourite song,
369
00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:26,320
Three Little Maids From School.
370
00:31:37,800 --> 00:31:40,390
♪ Three little maids from school are we
371
00:31:40,440 --> 00:31:43,390
♪ Pert as a schoolgirl well can be
372
00:31:43,440 --> 00:31:47,030
♪ Filled to the brim with girlish glee
373
00:31:47,080 --> 00:31:49,750
♪ Three little maids from school
374
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:53,440
♪ Everything is a source of fun
375
00:31:56,760 --> 00:31:59,120
♪ Nobody's safe... ♪
376
00:32:00,600 --> 00:32:02,560
Keep singing.
377
00:32:03,720 --> 00:32:07,070
- Oh! - Your dead auntie is
outside. Shall I wheel her in?
378
00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:10,800
Thank you, no. Let's not treat
her like a portable cabaret act.
379
00:32:14,000 --> 00:32:16,880
We'll move on. Larry?
380
00:32:22,640 --> 00:32:24,390
Sorry.
381
00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:27,390
Friends and relatives of
Hermione, local people,
382
00:32:27,440 --> 00:32:30,030
monks, animals.
383
00:32:30,080 --> 00:32:32,870
To quote the poet Emily Dickinson...
384
00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:34,990
Do give her a try, she's very good.
385
00:32:35,040 --> 00:32:39,110
'Dying is a wild night and a new road.'
386
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:42,230
Aunt Hermione is on that road now,
387
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:47,190
and as someone who's been in the
car with her, God help the driver.
388
00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:54,000
Like us, Hermione was rejuvenated by
this ramshackled but magical island.
389
00:32:54,720 --> 00:33:00,240
Maybe her heart couldn't take
what she called "surge of bliss".
390
00:33:33,720 --> 00:33:36,910
The Hawaiian lament known as the karooki.
391
00:33:36,960 --> 00:33:40,760
It's in my book about
death. Let's all try it now.
392
00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:46,270
All right, we won't, then,
but you get the gist.
393
00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:49,870
- I recently became a vegetarian. - Boo.
394
00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:52,910
So that cuts down on a lot of deaths,
395
00:33:52,960 --> 00:33:55,590
but it's never easy when it strikes.
396
00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:59,190
I cried buckets when my
first pet died. Stinky.
397
00:33:59,240 --> 00:34:01,230
- Stinky. - Stinky. - Stinky.
398
00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:04,230
Hermione was, of course, very English.
399
00:34:04,280 --> 00:34:08,790
I think the reason she was
acquiring so many admirers on Corfu
400
00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:12,990
was the same quality of robustness
which built the British Empire.
401
00:34:13,040 --> 00:34:17,670
My sympathy lies with Mr Anestis here.
402
00:34:17,720 --> 00:34:21,230
- Thank you.
- You brought out her sensual side
403
00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:23,590
which -- I speak as a single person --
404
00:34:23,640 --> 00:34:28,070
one may neglect if one is...
405
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:30,200
rather busy.
406
00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:39,390
Everyone's been sweet about my aunt
407
00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:42,510
and I spent most of my
life in fear of her.
408
00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:48,590
How fitting that she drew her
last mortal breath here in Corfu,
409
00:34:48,640 --> 00:34:52,520
where she learnt to relax and forgive,
410
00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:58,990
and to dance despite what
she called "foolish knees".
411
00:35:00,340 --> 00:35:03,870
She felt at home here,
and I say amen to that.
412
00:35:03,920 --> 00:35:05,550
Amen.
413
00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:09,990
I've recently become very aware
of the cycle of life and death.
414
00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:13,360
The old must make way for the new.
415
00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:19,400
And those of us in-between must
welcome and be friends to both.
416
00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:45,120
I'm so sorry. It went on for ages.
417
00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:52,920
The doctor says yes, I'm pregnant.
418
00:35:55,320 --> 00:35:58,230
Do you want to go check
with him I'm not lying?
419
00:35:58,280 --> 00:36:00,600
- I didn't think you were lying.
- Liar.
420
00:36:01,920 --> 00:36:06,150
- All right, but it was my brother's
stupid idea. - Liar and now coward.
421
00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:08,230
- I've been upset.
- And me?
422
00:36:08,280 --> 00:36:10,710
Did you see me doing happy skipping?
423
00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:15,110
And if I was happy you wouldn't
know, because you're not interested.
424
00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:18,640
Look, I've just been
managing not to go to pieces.
425
00:36:34,560 --> 00:36:38,270
I could not kill this,
even for the love of Margo.
426
00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:40,510
Oh, you poor thing.
427
00:36:40,560 --> 00:36:43,230
It's just as well --
this is the wrong goat.
428
00:36:43,780 --> 00:36:45,230
- Oh.
- Zoltan.
429
00:36:45,280 --> 00:36:47,790
- That's the wrong goat.
- I know!
430
00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:50,430
Sorry, I have been informed.
431
00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:53,310
It's so lovely you're just as weedy as us.
432
00:36:53,360 --> 00:36:57,080
Zoltan, you should know,
we British love a loser.
433
00:37:04,360 --> 00:37:08,400
Thanks a bunch. Of course she's
pregnant. You read too many books.
434
00:37:09,740 --> 00:37:10,440
Grrrr!
435
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,960
Looks like your auntie's ready to go home.
436
00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:47,790
- I did a bad thing.
- Well, you're not the first.
437
00:37:47,840 --> 00:37:50,640
Not that bad thing, another bad thing.
438
00:37:52,200 --> 00:37:55,280
I asked Daphne to go
to the doctor's with me,
439
00:37:56,960 --> 00:37:59,520
to check she WAS pregnant.
440
00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:05,040
She's pretty angry with me.
441
00:38:06,080 --> 00:38:10,680
Daphne's a decent girl. You
need to treat her well.
442
00:38:11,600 --> 00:38:13,440
I know.
443
00:38:14,280 --> 00:38:17,590
Sometimes, people who are
thrown together thrive.
444
00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:21,430
The choice isn't will you abandon
Daphne and the baby, or not?
445
00:38:21,480 --> 00:38:25,110
- Of course I won't.
- The choice is will you marry Daphne?
446
00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:27,350
And only you can decide that.
447
00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:31,480
Which is tragic, because I'd love
to decide everything for you.
448
00:38:44,960 --> 00:38:49,710
- She is huge. Spectacular tegmina!
- I'm so glad you're here.
449
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:53,230
I wanted my family to share my
interest, but it's exhausting.
450
00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:56,760
Ooh, I think it's finally happening.
451
00:38:57,480 --> 00:39:01,270
- Who's your money on?
- You'd be a fool to bet against Geronimo.
452
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:03,920
- You'd be a fool to bet ever.
- Of course.
453
00:39:09,160 --> 00:39:11,440
- Should we separate them?
- Too late.
454
00:39:42,760 --> 00:39:44,800
That was horrible.
455
00:40:22,720 --> 00:40:24,720
- Hello.
- Hello.
456
00:40:28,360 --> 00:40:30,680
~
457
00:40:32,720 --> 00:40:35,000
I'm sorry, I've been hopeless.
458
00:40:35,600 --> 00:40:37,920
I want to do everything properly now.
459
00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:41,040
- ~
- ~
460
00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:44,360
Agree to marry my daughter.
461
00:40:51,840 --> 00:40:53,520
No.
462
00:40:55,720 --> 00:41:00,200
A marriage needs love and I'm
afraid I'm not in love with Daphne.
463
00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:06,200
So you'll have to shoot me now
if you can't live with that.
464
00:41:09,280 --> 00:41:13,600
But I will be a reliable support
to Daphne, and a good father.
465
00:41:14,320 --> 00:41:16,600
My family will provide for the baby.
466
00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:31,360
I did actually deliver a
baby last year by myself.
467
00:41:33,080 --> 00:41:35,070
Another time.
468
00:41:35,120 --> 00:41:37,120
- Daphne, let's talk.
- Ella!
469
00:42:02,140 --> 00:42:03,220
One new bed!
470
00:42:04,880 --> 00:42:07,630
A present from your Turkish friend.
471
00:42:07,680 --> 00:42:11,310
Zoltan bought me a new bed,
because the other one was haunted.
472
00:42:11,360 --> 00:42:15,040
- No, it wasn't. - What? - I made
the shape on the bed by lying on it.
473
00:42:15,680 --> 00:42:19,230
You were asking for it by saying
you "believe in everything".
474
00:42:19,280 --> 00:42:22,360
That's no way to live. Believe in truth.
475
00:42:26,280 --> 00:42:28,600
She got a free bed out of it.
476
00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:33,990
How's Daphne?
477
00:42:34,040 --> 00:42:36,230
She used to be so strong.
478
00:42:36,280 --> 00:42:38,680
Now she's all cowed.
479
00:42:41,640 --> 00:42:43,720
- So?
- It's all right.
480
00:42:44,080 --> 00:42:46,080
We'll be apart.
481
00:42:46,440 --> 00:42:48,670
But it's not all right.
482
00:42:48,720 --> 00:42:52,390
I've tried to shut it all out
-- I hate bloody explaining --
483
00:42:52,440 --> 00:42:55,280
because I don't want a baby.
484
00:42:56,240 --> 00:42:58,280
I know. Come here.
485
00:42:59,080 --> 00:43:02,550
I just feel so trapped,
like I can't go back.
486
00:43:02,600 --> 00:43:05,910
Nothing's ever been so...
so permanent before.
487
00:43:05,960 --> 00:43:08,560
I'm not ready to be a parent.
488
00:43:09,920 --> 00:43:14,000
If it makes you feel any better,
I'm not ready to be a grandparent.
489
00:43:16,000 --> 00:43:18,240
Or to take over from Aunt Hermione.
490
00:43:22,420 --> 00:43:25,470
- I found a terrific ditch.
- Margo, no!
491
00:43:26,520 --> 00:43:28,640
Ha! What are you going to sleep on now?
492
00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:32,080
Why are there mattresses everywhere?
493
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:49,070
These are your papers, Mrs Durrell.
494
00:43:49,120 --> 00:43:51,870
- If they seize the corpse...
- I'm sorry,
495
00:43:51,920 --> 00:43:54,870
but you are rather
tactless for an undertaker.
496
00:43:54,920 --> 00:43:57,310
- Can we use another word, please?
- Carcass?
497
00:43:58,360 --> 00:43:59,630
This is very important.
498
00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:03,310
Read the list properly,
like it's Keats or something.
499
00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:06,760
Don't buy the wrong fishnet
stockings. Thank you.
500
00:44:07,280 --> 00:44:09,800
Now, just don't drown in the ditch.
501
00:44:14,480 --> 00:44:19,240
- I'm sorry about my advice.
- No, I've been weird.
502
00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:22,880
I just want to say, whatever happens...
503
00:44:23,680 --> 00:44:26,430
- I really need this ammo,...
- Oh.
504
00:44:26,480 --> 00:44:29,840
.. and there are a dozen
specific gun magazines.
505
00:44:32,680 --> 00:44:35,670
Please look after my
children while I'm away.
506
00:44:35,720 --> 00:44:37,920
They suddenly seem very vulnerable.
507
00:44:39,200 --> 00:44:41,400
I would love to.
508
00:44:42,720 --> 00:44:45,960
And what can I bring you
back from England, Spiros?
509
00:44:47,040 --> 00:44:48,880
Yourself.
510
00:44:59,880 --> 00:45:01,880
Come on, Auntie.
511
00:45:02,720 --> 00:45:04,960
One last trip.
512
00:45:06,160 --> 00:45:08,400
- Bye.
- Bye, Mum.
513
00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:37,870
Larry, this is, er, Jonquil,
Henry Miller, and Ruby.
514
00:45:37,920 --> 00:45:40,030
At last. People like me.
515
00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:42,630
The house is buggered.
516
00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:45,790
Your mother asked me to watch over you.
517
00:45:45,840 --> 00:45:49,510
- No Zoltan until she returns. So you
have not seen him. - Of course not.
518
00:45:49,560 --> 00:45:52,070
- Be kind to donkeys!
- Come to my room.
519
00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:56,350
- Why? - I've got a job
with the Corfu police force!
520
00:45:58,300 --> 00:46:00,040
I want to stay here in England.
40638
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.