Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:03,900 --> 00:01:07,000
Ah!
2
00:01:23,800 --> 00:01:27,399
Come on Penny, call it.
Where the fuck are they?
3
00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:30,099
Uh... there!
4
00:01:30,100 --> 00:01:33,100
- Brains!
- I can shoot through ya!
5
00:01:34,900 --> 00:01:37,499
Right in the kisser.
6
00:01:37,500 --> 00:01:40,198
You know you don't have
to take such pleasure Max.
7
00:01:40,199 --> 00:01:43,098
That used to be a human being.
Shut it, Penny! Remember,
8
00:01:43,099 --> 00:01:46,198
Direction is critical. I wanna
hear one o'clock, two o'clock,
9
00:01:46,199 --> 00:01:48,100
- three o'clock...
- Ten to ten!
10
00:01:48,101 --> 00:01:50,400
Whoa!
11
00:01:52,900 --> 00:01:58,100
Christ, Penny,
little help would be nice.
12
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:06,400
OK!
13
00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:12,100
- Old school.
- Nice.
14
00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:16,200
Show off.
15
00:02:21,900 --> 00:02:24,099
Well?
16
00:02:24,100 --> 00:02:27,899
Uh... um... I don't know.
17
00:02:27,900 --> 00:02:29,900
I'm getting multiple readings.
18
00:02:29,901 --> 00:02:34,299
Multiple readings,
piece of shit. Soo-eee!
19
00:02:34,300 --> 00:02:36,199
Zombie, zombie, zombie,
20
00:02:36,200 --> 00:02:42,299
zombie, zombie, zombie.
Soo-eee! Brains.
21
00:02:42,300 --> 00:02:44,899
Brains.
22
00:02:44,900 --> 00:02:48,299
Looks like this party's
just getting started.
23
00:02:48,300 --> 00:02:50,999
Brains.
24
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:54,000
Brains.-?
25
00:03:24,300 --> 00:03:26,299
Eww!
26
00:03:26,300 --> 00:03:29,999
Shh, Tina.
You'll wake Sarah and Craig.
27
00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:32,399
It's just a bug.
28
00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:34,600
I'm sorry, Steve,
I'm just not really
29
00:03:34,601 --> 00:03:36,999
used to all this... nature.
30
00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:41,599
Don't worry, the family
cottage is very modern.
31
00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:44,600
The outhouse is barely
20 feet from the front door.
32
00:03:44,601 --> 00:03:47,899
Haha, very funny.
OK, I need you
33
00:03:47,900 --> 00:03:51,099
to focus.
Think head table. Ready?
34
00:03:51,100 --> 00:03:53,299
A?
35
00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:55,400
Or B?
36
00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:01,599
Uh... A?
37
00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:04,698
Oh, my God, I'm so happy that you said
that, 'cause otherwise I would have
38
00:04:04,699 --> 00:04:07,200
had to order in the yellow
orchids from Thailand, and
39
00:04:07,201 --> 00:04:11,299
I think they almost look the same.
Almost.
40
00:04:11,300 --> 00:04:14,198
Why don't you put that away
for now, Tina?
41
00:04:14,199 --> 00:04:17,300
You did promise you were gonna
have fun this weekend.
42
00:04:17,301 --> 00:04:21,199
- You're sweet. I promise to have fun.
- Good.
43
00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:25,199
- 'Cause I scheduled it in the itinerary.
- Um...
44
00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:27,699
I'm just joking. That's not
45
00:04:27,700 --> 00:04:31,199
the itinerary
for the weekend. This is.
46
00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:34,999
- Tina...
- Look, Steve,
47
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:39,600
there's still so much to do, and you've
been so busy with your whole work
48
00:04:39,601 --> 00:04:42,599
human resource thingy.
Workplace conflict
49
00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:44,999
- resolution initiatives.
- Yes,
50
00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:49,398
you've had all that stuff. I guess
I'm just feeling overwhelmed.
51
00:04:49,399 --> 00:04:53,600
I know that 300 people may seem like
a small guest list. 300 people?
52
00:04:53,601 --> 00:04:56,499
But in my family, it's tiny.
53
00:04:56,500 --> 00:04:58,498
I've had to make
a lot of compromises
54
00:04:58,499 --> 00:05:00,700
for this wedding,
which I'm happy to do,
55
00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:03,999
but I just want this
to be a special day
56
00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:06,299
for both of us.
57
00:05:06,300 --> 00:05:08,699
It will be, baby.
I promise you.
58
00:05:08,700 --> 00:05:11,600
- No doubt in my mind.
- Roll over.
59
00:05:14,100 --> 00:05:17,599
Your sister snores like a man.
60
00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:20,699
- I know. It's cute.
- Yeah.
61
00:05:20,700 --> 00:05:24,100
I never thought my matron of honour would
snore louder than my husband, but...
62
00:05:24,101 --> 00:05:25,599
Tina.
63
00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:28,499
It's just that
your sister and I are...
64
00:05:28,500 --> 00:05:30,499
different.
65
00:05:30,500 --> 00:05:32,699
I know, and I'm very happy
66
00:05:32,700 --> 00:05:34,700
that you chose her
to be your maid of honour.
67
00:05:34,701 --> 00:05:37,799
Matron.
She's married, and older.
68
00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:40,499
Well, it really means
a lot to me.
69
00:05:40,500 --> 00:05:43,699
Aw, honey,
you mean a lot to me.
70
00:05:43,700 --> 00:05:49,299
And you mean a lot to Muffins!
71
00:05:49,300 --> 00:05:52,799
You mean a lot
to me too, Muffins.
72
00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:57,099
Yes you do. Yes you do.
73
00:05:57,100 --> 00:05:58,599
Aww.
74
00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:00,199
So cute!
75
00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:02,500
Gross, Steve.
Those things eat their own shit.
76
00:06:02,501 --> 00:06:05,799
What are you talking about?
Germans?
77
00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:07,799
Tina's rodent.
78
00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:12,199
- Sarah, would you like to hold him?
- No.
79
00:06:12,200 --> 00:06:15,399
I would. Gimme
this little shit eater.
80
00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:19,099
- Ah. Ahhh.
- Get it away!
81
00:06:19,100 --> 00:06:21,499
Would you look at us?
82
00:06:21,500 --> 00:06:24,699
One big happy family
on vacation.
83
00:06:24,700 --> 00:06:27,699
Yeah, it's gonna be great.
84
00:06:27,700 --> 00:06:30,099
Yep.
85
00:06:30,100 --> 00:06:33,099
I spy with my little eye
86
00:06:33,100 --> 00:06:36,699
something that is... fluffy.
87
00:06:36,700 --> 00:06:39,298
Ha-ha-ha! You're
talking about the rabbit!
88
00:06:39,299 --> 00:06:42,300
I am talking about the rabbit!
You got it on the first go!
89
00:06:42,301 --> 00:06:45,299
This is why we're together!
You're good!
90
00:06:45,300 --> 00:06:49,800
Aaaaaaand... here we are.
91
00:06:55,100 --> 00:07:00,199
So? What do you think
of the Williams family cottage?
92
00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:04,099
Uh... It's... charming.
93
00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:07,299
Baby, I told you
we're roughing it.
94
00:07:07,300 --> 00:07:09,399
Sarah!
95
00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:11,498
I need to know
where the cleaning products are.
96
00:07:11,499 --> 00:07:14,600
We really need to give
this place a once over.
97
00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:17,299
Yes, Miss Tina.
98
00:07:17,300 --> 00:07:19,500
Right aways, Miss Tina.
99
00:07:31,900 --> 00:07:34,599
- They hate each other.
- Yep.
100
00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:36,898
I thought asking her
to be her maid of honour would
101
00:07:36,899 --> 00:07:39,498
bring them closer together.
Well, bitches are crazy.
102
00:07:39,499 --> 00:07:41,898
Even when they like each other,
they hate each other.
103
00:07:41,899 --> 00:07:43,898
Maybe they
really like each other.
104
00:07:43,899 --> 00:07:46,198
No, those bitches
really hate each other.
105
00:07:46,199 --> 00:07:50,298
Well, I deal with conflict resolution
opportunities like this every day.
106
00:07:50,299 --> 00:07:53,498
I think I can, uh...
No, listen, buddy, seriously,
107
00:07:53,499 --> 00:07:55,187
your whole corporate
Jedi mind shit, it's not
108
00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:56,898
gonna work for your
team-building skills here.
109
00:07:56,899 --> 00:07:59,898
I got a few activities planned I think
will help mend this relationship.
110
00:07:59,899 --> 00:08:03,798
Mmm. And I have a few activities planned
that'll help us get shit faced!
111
00:08:03,799 --> 00:08:07,500
Craig, you're family. I need
you on board this weekend.
112
00:08:07,501 --> 00:08:09,600
You're my best man!
113
00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:17,799
You are so... sexy right now.
114
00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:20,199
Craig, I'm being serious.
115
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,200
And our balls are
kinda touching.
116
00:08:22,201 --> 00:08:24,800
It's OK, we're family. It's OK.
117
00:08:28,300 --> 00:08:31,500
All right, don't mention that.
That one's free.
118
00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:17,500
Steve, honey, let's see.
119
00:09:20,700 --> 00:09:24,700
Oh, well, look at you.
You're getting there. Craig?
120
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:30,199
Wow, Craig, those are perfect.
121
00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:32,298
Yeah, can I drink now, please?
122
00:09:32,299 --> 00:09:34,598
Oh, God, this is brutal!
This is the cottage.
123
00:09:34,599 --> 00:09:36,998
We're supposed to be having fun.
Its just one more hour,
124
00:09:36,999 --> 00:09:39,698
OK, guys? I mean, we're almost
done the place cards, and then
125
00:09:39,699 --> 00:09:42,698
all we have to do is pick out the
readings, make the photographer's list,
126
00:09:42,699 --> 00:09:44,238
we're gonna rehearse the
speeches real quick.
127
00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:45,800
Babe... Sarah's right.
128
00:09:45,900 --> 00:09:50,498
This is our first night here. Why
don't we play a game or something?
129
00:09:50,499 --> 00:09:53,498
- Yes! I'll grab the beers.
- What kind of game?
130
00:09:53,499 --> 00:09:56,600
Now, the object of this game
is to untangle ourselves
131
00:09:56,601 --> 00:10:00,599
without letting go
of each other's hands.
132
00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,998
- Steve, is this a team-building exercise?
- It's a team-building GAME.
133
00:10:03,999 --> 00:10:06,598
- So it's like a party game?
- It's kinda like a party game.
134
00:10:06,599 --> 00:10:08,538
It's kinda like retarded.
135
00:10:08,551 --> 00:10:10,500
Sarah, we have to work
together as a team.
136
00:10:10,501 --> 00:10:12,499
- Can I get my beer?
- No,
137
00:10:12,500 --> 00:10:15,298
we can't let go of each other's
hands, and we can't talk.
138
00:10:15,299 --> 00:10:18,500
- I can't drink and I can't talk?
- Non-verbal cues only.
139
00:10:18,501 --> 00:10:21,499
All right, fine.
140
00:10:21,500 --> 00:10:23,000
Starting...
141
00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:30,899
Ow!
142
00:10:30,900 --> 00:10:33,899
- Sorry.
- Just...
143
00:10:33,900 --> 00:10:36,899
go under there.
Guys! Remember the rules.
144
00:10:36,900 --> 00:10:38,800
There's no talking.
145
00:10:42,500 --> 00:10:45,598
Oh, God. Time out. Time out.
I can't breath!
146
00:10:45,599 --> 00:10:49,398
Oh, my God! I'm sorry. I tried to
go under your arm, but I got stuck
147
00:10:49,399 --> 00:10:51,398
in your underarm fa... My what?
148
00:10:51,399 --> 00:10:53,798
OK, let's play another game,
shall we?
149
00:10:53,799 --> 00:10:56,500
What, did my matronly
underarm fat get in your way?
150
00:10:56,501 --> 00:10:59,599
Oh, Sarah,
don't be so dramatic.
151
00:10:59,600 --> 00:11:03,698
I'm dramatic? You're the one who's
wedding is taking over our vacation.
152
00:11:03,699 --> 00:11:06,798
Well, if you really feel that way,
then maybe I shouldn't have made you
153
00:11:06,799 --> 00:11:08,798
my matron of honour instead of
one of my real friends!
154
00:11:08,799 --> 00:11:10,900
Hey, let's get drunk!
How does that sound?
155
00:11:10,901 --> 00:11:13,899
Way ahead of you, buddy.
156
00:11:13,900 --> 00:11:15,900
Fine! I don't want
to be your god damned matron!
157
00:11:15,901 --> 00:11:17,899
- Fine!
- Fine!
158
00:11:17,900 --> 00:11:20,798
Calm down!
Let's get a little fresh air.
159
00:11:20,799 --> 00:11:22,800
Nobody wants fresh air
but you, Steve.
160
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:50,499
Ah. Ow.
161
00:11:50,500 --> 00:11:52,700
Will you please just...
162
00:11:54,900 --> 00:11:57,999
What the...?
163
00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,799
Ow! Ow!
164
00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:02,800
Ow!
Steve, what is wrong with you?
165
00:12:02,801 --> 00:12:05,699
- Ow! Jesus! Ow!
- Steve?
166
00:12:05,700 --> 00:12:08,099
Ow!
167
00:12:08,100 --> 00:12:10,699
Ah! Ah!
168
00:12:10,700 --> 00:12:13,700
Oh, my God! Steve!
169
00:12:20,500 --> 00:12:22,799
Holy fuck, dude!
170
00:12:22,800 --> 00:12:27,499
Are you all right?
It just kept coming at me.
171
00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:29,598
I thought I killed it,
and then it bit me again.
172
00:12:29,599 --> 00:12:33,698
- Whoa! That's a lot of blood.
- Oh, honey, are you all right?
173
00:12:33,699 --> 00:12:35,998
No, he's gonna be fine,
all right? Some dudes just can't
174
00:12:35,999 --> 00:12:38,398
take the sight of their own
blood. Like, I was sword fishing
175
00:12:38,399 --> 00:12:41,198
once, and buddy was casting off,
and he catches his buddy's nose,
176
00:12:41,199 --> 00:12:43,698
and, like, rips like half of it
off, there's blood everywhere...
177
00:12:43,699 --> 00:12:45,700
- I think I'm gonna be sick.
- All right, that is it.
178
00:12:45,701 --> 00:12:49,699
Party is over. We are going to bed.
Yeah. Definitely.
179
00:12:49,700 --> 00:12:53,100
Steve, seriously? You're gonna
make me drink alone?
180
00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:57,499
Groom's mess.
Best man cleans up.
181
00:12:57,500 --> 00:13:00,500
I'm gonna go
set some place cards on fire.
182
00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:04,600
That's a buzz kill.
183
00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:11,900
Maybe we should go home in the morning.
This may not have been the best idea.
184
00:13:11,901 --> 00:13:13,499
Hmm?
185
00:13:13,500 --> 00:13:16,700
It's just that I get
a lot of work done at home
186
00:13:16,701 --> 00:13:20,499
and, you know,
the salon really needs me.
187
00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:23,999
No. No, no, no.
I think we should stay.
188
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:26,199
It's just that your sister is
189
00:13:26,200 --> 00:13:31,699
so... Baby, are you OK?
You're as white as a ghost.
190
00:13:31,700 --> 00:13:33,899
I don't feel so good.
191
00:13:33,900 --> 00:13:36,999
Ohhh, is my big
192
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:39,900
strong man scared
of a little bit of blood?
193
00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:42,599
I know what'll
make you feel better.
194
00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:46,699
You haven't had one of these
in a while.
195
00:13:46,700 --> 00:13:49,199
Oh, yeah?
196
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:53,099
A... foot massage!
197
00:13:53,100 --> 00:13:56,200
Oh. Yeah!
198
00:14:01,700 --> 00:14:05,099
It's weird. I just...
I just don't feel right.
199
00:14:05,100 --> 00:14:06,899
You have cold feet.
200
00:14:06,900 --> 00:14:09,898
No. No, no, no, no, no.
No, I don't. It's, it's...
201
00:14:09,899 --> 00:14:12,198
I'm stressed
about everybody getting along.
202
00:14:12,199 --> 00:14:14,900
No, Steve,
your feet are like icicles.
203
00:14:14,901 --> 00:14:19,799
- Oh. Sorry.
- That's OK.
204
00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:24,299
Sarah and I... we just...
205
00:14:24,300 --> 00:14:29,599
we just rub each other the wrong
way sometimes, that's all.
206
00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:32,199
I love you, baby.
207
00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:35,599
You're cute.
208
00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:39,199
OK, I promise
to make more of an effort
209
00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:41,999
to play nice with your sister.
210
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:44,598
And I promise
to make more of an effort
211
00:14:44,599 --> 00:14:46,500
not to get attacked
by killer mosquitoes.
212
00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:49,099
You can't help it.
213
00:14:49,100 --> 00:14:53,600
They like to suck your blood
because you're so sweet.
214
00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:00,000
Ah-ah.
215
00:15:04,900 --> 00:15:07,199
- Hey, Penny.
- Yeah.
216
00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:11,100
Come here, get a picture of me
with fat zombie here.
217
00:15:13,900 --> 00:15:16,538
You're a child, Max.
218
00:15:16,551 --> 00:15:19,200
Ooh, that'll be a keeper.
This is weird.
219
00:15:19,300 --> 00:15:22,799
I've never seen the orb... whoa...
flicker like this.
220
00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:26,599
Really? What's it saying?
221
00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:30,599
- What?
- Tactical Bacon is... that way!
222
00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:35,799
- Max.
- Are you hungry, fat zombie?
223
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:38,299
I want some Tactical Bacon!
224
00:15:38,300 --> 00:15:41,698
Max. - Of course you're hungry, fat zombie.
You're a fat zombie.
225
00:15:41,699 --> 00:15:43,700
Max, we need
to investigate the area, OK?
226
00:15:43,701 --> 00:15:47,799
All right. Should we investigate
the area, fat zombie?
227
00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:50,299
Tactical Bacon now!
228
00:15:50,300 --> 00:15:54,099
- The orb is never wrong, OK?
- Yeah, OK, right.
229
00:15:54,100 --> 00:15:58,799
Well, we'll eat and then
we'll check out the area.
230
00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:02,298
But, uh, first, come here, come over here.
Come here. Yeah?
231
00:16:02,299 --> 00:16:05,300
I want you to give fat zombie
a little kiss.
232
00:16:05,301 --> 00:16:08,799
- Eww, no!
- Why, is it 'cause he's fat?
233
00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:11,800
- No!
- Jesus!
234
00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:16,199
- Ah!
- My bad.
235
00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,700
So much for your magic orb.
Let's eat.
236
00:16:18,701 --> 00:16:22,100
- Uh, it's still flickering.
- Oh, Christ.
237
00:16:23,700 --> 00:16:25,099
Happy?
238
00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:27,100
No, it's... it's so strange.
239
00:16:27,101 --> 00:16:30,099
- It's a...
- Penny!
240
00:16:30,100 --> 00:16:33,200
- It's as if...
- Tactical Bacon!
241
00:16:51,100 --> 00:16:54,099
Good morning! Cory Cortex here,
242
00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:57,000
comin' at your undead headswith all the brainformation
243
00:16:57,001 --> 00:17:00,699
a hungry mind can handle,here at AM 640, The...
244
00:17:00,700 --> 00:17:03,298
- ...Brain!- Where we get into your heads
245
00:17:03,299 --> 00:17:06,198
and sink our teethinto what really matters...
246
00:17:06,199 --> 00:17:10,198
grey matter, that is! Right now
traffic is a real headache.
247
00:17:10,199 --> 00:17:13,498
In fact, it's a bloody mess!And before you head out
248
00:17:13,499 --> 00:17:16,200
to work, you...Good morning, husband.
249
00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:18,300
- Rise and shine.
- Huh.
250
00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:32,500
Hmm!
251
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:42,200
Come on, sweetie.
Have some breakfast.
252
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:53,899
Did someone say breakfast?
253
00:17:53,900 --> 00:17:56,499
Oh, ha-ha!
254
00:17:56,500 --> 00:17:57,899
Muah!
255
00:17:57,900 --> 00:18:00,799
Oh, hey, Steve.
Oh, that looks good!
256
00:18:00,800 --> 00:18:03,400
You gonna eat all that?
No, thank you.
257
00:18:03,401 --> 00:18:06,199
Hey, Craig, do you want
to go for a run?
258
00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:09,500
I would, pal, but the weather
forecast says there could...
259
00:18:09,501 --> 00:18:12,499
be rain.
260
00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:17,000
- Would anyone like a smoothie?
- I would.
261
00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:23,299
Oh, no!
262
00:18:23,300 --> 00:18:26,299
Brain freeeeeeeze!
263
00:18:26,300 --> 00:18:29,000
Well, let us
help you with that.
264
00:18:31,900 --> 00:18:33,999
Mmm!
265
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:36,299
Mmm! So good! Steve,
266
00:18:36,300 --> 00:18:38,500
you wanna come try this
with us?
267
00:18:38,501 --> 00:18:40,999
- Brains.
- Brains.
268
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:42,499
Brains!
269
00:18:42,500 --> 00:18:44,599
- Brains.
- Brains?
270
00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:46,499
THE brain!
271
00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:49,299
Oh, come on!
272
00:18:49,300 --> 00:18:52,900
- Ah, brains.
- Brains. - Brains.
273
00:18:59,500 --> 00:19:03,000
- Brains.
- Brains.
274
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,999
Are you sure
I can't help, Tina?
275
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,298
Nope! I'm scheduled
for breakfast.
276
00:19:32,299 --> 00:19:35,798
And then I have you guys cleaning
up, I have Steve and Sarah
277
00:19:35,799 --> 00:19:38,498
making lunch,
and Craig and I will clean up,
278
00:19:38,499 --> 00:19:40,438
and then I have Steve and
Craig starting dinner.
279
00:19:40,451 --> 00:19:42,400
If that's cool with you guys.
AND
280
00:19:42,401 --> 00:19:47,000
I even gave everyone colour-
coded tabs to avoid confusion!
281
00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:53,499
Vacation itinerary. Yay!
282
00:19:53,500 --> 00:19:55,599
- Good morning!
- Hey,
283
00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:57,999
Pooh bear. You're up late.
284
00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,500
Uh, ooh, no.
285
00:20:03,500 --> 00:20:06,299
Oh, my God. You look like shit.
286
00:20:06,300 --> 00:20:09,199
Nothing a good run won't cure,
right?
287
00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:13,599
Everything OK with you girls?
288
00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:16,599
Super. OK, shall we?
289
00:20:16,600 --> 00:20:19,600
Don't be late. I'm making quiche.
All right!
290
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:27,000
You know,
I could teach you how to cook.
291
00:20:27,001 --> 00:20:33,099
When you get married, man, it's like a
constant battle to hang on to your manhood.
292
00:20:33,100 --> 00:20:35,098
You guys seem
to be doing all right.
293
00:20:35,099 --> 00:20:37,098
Yeah, well,
your sister's pretty cool.
294
00:20:37,099 --> 00:20:40,098
She's like the female version of you.
That's why I married her.
295
00:20:40,099 --> 00:20:43,098
- That's really disturbing.
- Yeah, well, they always say,
296
00:20:43,099 --> 00:20:45,400
marry your best friend,
and in a weird sort a way.
297
00:20:45,401 --> 00:20:49,399
- I suppose I did.
- OK, stop.
298
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:53,500
To be honest, man, I don't even recognize
you anymore. You're all... safe.
299
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:55,499
What's the matter?
300
00:20:55,500 --> 00:20:57,899
Sorry. I can't find my pulse.
301
00:20:57,900 --> 00:21:00,098
You should be looking
for your balls.
302
00:21:00,099 --> 00:21:02,398
All right, enough.
You're my best man.
303
00:21:02,399 --> 00:21:04,398
You're supposed to be...
No, a best man is
304
00:21:04,399 --> 00:21:06,398
supposed to be the guy
that's telling you
305
00:21:06,399 --> 00:21:07,937
exactly the way it is. And
that's what I'm doing.
306
00:21:07,950 --> 00:21:09,498
I've known you since college.
307
00:21:09,499 --> 00:21:12,400
Face it, Steve, you're about
to settle into the big sleep...
308
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:22,700
Steve!
309
00:21:26,300 --> 00:21:30,598
Listen to me, all right? Men,
we're all wired to be alpha dogs.
310
00:21:30,599 --> 00:21:35,000
Even pussy ones like you who want to
be Bill fuckin' Cosby, all right?
311
00:21:35,001 --> 00:21:37,599
And women, they dig alpha dogs.
312
00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:41,098
Even strong-willed bitches
like ours. You want to be happy?
313
00:21:41,099 --> 00:21:43,998
Grow some 'nads, all right? Don't
care about peoples' feelings
314
00:21:43,999 --> 00:21:47,700
or expectations. Take what you want, man.
Take what you want...
315
00:21:47,701 --> 00:21:50,499
Oh, God, that's gross, man!
316
00:21:50,500 --> 00:21:52,698
Come on!
You know what that was?
317
00:21:52,699 --> 00:21:56,200
- Chimichanga?
- No, that was a selfish, thoughtless
318
00:21:56,201 --> 00:21:59,999
urge. And I haven't heard
or smelt you fart in like
319
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:02,599
three years.
And do you know why?
320
00:22:02,600 --> 00:22:06,700
'Cause you're not allowed to.
Heh! Brutal.
321
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:10,399
Do me a favour:
322
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:12,337
Don't tell Sarah I was smoking.
How do I smell?
323
00:22:12,350 --> 00:22:14,298
You smell like ass!
324
00:22:14,299 --> 00:22:17,600
And Mexican food. Christ!
Eat a salad. Jealous.
325
00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:29,200
Steve, you know we're gonna eat
at least twice more today, right?
326
00:22:29,201 --> 00:22:32,199
I can't help it. I'm starving.
327
00:22:32,200 --> 00:22:36,100
I'm just happy that you're
feeling better, honey.
328
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:41,799
Eww!
329
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:44,599
Gross! Steve,
330
00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:47,498
you know I don't like that.
I am so sorry.
331
00:22:47,499 --> 00:22:49,500
I don't know
what just happened.
332
00:22:49,501 --> 00:22:52,799
Are you OK?
You look really pale.
333
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:58,199
Too fast, didn't you? Did you
eats too fast? Is there too many
334
00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:03,100
- eggies in your little belly?
- Are you not feeling very goo...
335
00:23:15,300 --> 00:23:17,599
Excuse me.
336
00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:20,399
Uh... I'm just, um...
337
00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:24,700
I'm just gonna make sure
he's OK. I'll be right back.
338
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:34,700
I know the itinerary says
I'm supposed to clean up...
339
00:23:34,701 --> 00:23:36,400
but...
340
00:23:44,100 --> 00:23:45,600
It's fine.
341
00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:54,499
- Hey.
- Hey.
342
00:23:54,500 --> 00:23:56,899
You're smoking?
343
00:23:56,900 --> 00:24:00,400
I thought you gave it up
when you moved in with Craig.
344
00:24:00,401 --> 00:24:04,899
Yeah, I started again
after you proposed to Tina.
345
00:24:04,900 --> 00:24:07,500
I don't know
what's happening to me.
346
00:24:07,501 --> 00:24:13,099
- You're marrying a fuckin' bitch?
- Don't start, please.
347
00:24:13,100 --> 00:24:15,498
Why can't you just try
to get along?
348
00:24:15,499 --> 00:24:17,600
I'm sorry, Steve,
but I don't like her.
349
00:24:17,601 --> 00:24:23,799
And I resent you for guilting me into being
her matron of honour. I'm happy with Tina.
350
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:26,799
Steve, you look like shit, OK?
351
00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:29,498
And I think maybe this is
your body's way of telling you
352
00:24:29,499 --> 00:24:31,898
something
that your brain is afraid to.
353
00:24:31,899 --> 00:24:33,898
OK, I'm giving up
a few things here and there.
354
00:24:33,899 --> 00:24:36,698
That's it.
That's what a relationship is!
355
00:24:36,699 --> 00:24:38,700
I'm not like you, Sarah.
I'm not...
356
00:24:38,701 --> 00:24:42,199
- A bitch?
- No. I'm not...
357
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:44,799
super strongly opinionated.
358
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:48,199
All I want is to be content.
359
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:49,599
Satisfied.
360
00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:52,499
Not struggling
or hungry for anything.
361
00:24:52,500 --> 00:24:54,800
Well, then you're already dead.
362
00:24:54,801 --> 00:24:57,299
Don't you want more
to live for?
363
00:24:57,300 --> 00:25:01,399
I'm happy
with the way things are.
364
00:25:01,400 --> 00:25:04,900
Please, just... just be nice.
365
00:25:07,500 --> 00:25:09,499
Fine.
366
00:25:09,500 --> 00:25:11,899
If that's what you want.
367
00:25:11,900 --> 00:25:14,799
It is. Thank you.
368
00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:17,599
Are you feeling any better?
369
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:20,599
I'm still really hungry,
actually.
370
00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:24,399
Well, I wouldn't
recommend the quiche.
371
00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:26,800
It was made
by a fucking gutter cunt.
372
00:25:26,801 --> 00:25:29,499
Whoa!
373
00:25:29,500 --> 00:25:32,600
Sorry, I'm just getting
my fill while I can.
374
00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:37,199
Don't tell Craig
I was smoking, K?
375
00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:40,500
I'm going to go hose the puke
off your bride to be.
376
00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:57,699
Max. These readings are like
nothing I've ever seen before.
377
00:25:57,700 --> 00:26:00,398
That piece o' shit's
a thousand years old, Penny.
378
00:26:00,399 --> 00:26:03,900
The warranty is long gone.
Max, the orb is fine, OK?
379
00:26:03,901 --> 00:26:08,399
It's these readings... they're
just, uh, different.
380
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:12,700
We have to interpret them. That's
your department, sweet cheeks.
381
00:26:14,600 --> 00:26:16,798
Look, I,
I can't be sure, but, um...
382
00:26:16,799 --> 00:26:19,600
I think we might have
a mutation on our hands.
383
00:26:19,601 --> 00:26:21,799
Mutated zombies? Bring it!
384
00:26:21,800 --> 00:26:25,499
No, um, I don't think
it's a zombie, actually.
385
00:26:25,500 --> 00:26:28,500
I thought that thing only
searched out meat puppets.
386
00:26:28,501 --> 00:26:31,599
Well, I mean,
it could be, but I also t...
387
00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:33,599
Max? Max... Max!
388
00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:36,500
Max! Jesus Christ!
389
00:26:38,900 --> 00:26:41,138
OK, where's all the
little lightning bolts?
390
00:26:41,151 --> 00:26:43,399
Uh, well,
391
00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:45,598
well, that's, that's the thing.
I mean, I mean,
392
00:26:45,599 --> 00:26:47,798
the charges indicate
the presence
393
00:26:47,799 --> 00:26:50,398
of zombie DNA, so when one is
near, it activates.
394
00:26:50,399 --> 00:26:53,398
But this flickering could
indicate a hybrid.
395
00:26:53,399 --> 00:26:56,700
Hybrid? What, you mean
like a fuckin' hippie car?
396
00:26:56,701 --> 00:27:00,300
No, Max, like a...
fucking resistant host.
397
00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:02,387
Oh, Christ, that reminds
me of my ex-girlfriend.
398
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:04,398
Max, this could be
399
00:27:04,399 --> 00:27:07,098
exactly what I've been
looking for... Waaaah!
400
00:27:07,099 --> 00:27:10,798
Oh, Penny, for Christ's sake, that's
the last time you drive. - Look Max,
401
00:27:10,799 --> 00:27:13,800
this could be exactly
what I've been looking for, OK?
402
00:27:13,801 --> 00:27:17,999
A person with the genetic
make-up to resist the symptoms!
403
00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:21,998
I'm tellin' ya, Penny, the only
good zombie is a dead zombie.
404
00:27:21,999 --> 00:27:25,000
No, no, no. This could be why the
orb has been acting so strangely.
405
00:27:25,001 --> 00:27:28,399
And if we can
capture this... person,
406
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:31,400
we could extract their DNA
and find a vaccine, Max!
407
00:27:31,401 --> 00:27:34,300
Yeah, well, dream on.
408
00:27:39,700 --> 00:27:42,698
- Hey. - Oh, hey, buddy!
- Where you guys going?
409
00:27:42,699 --> 00:27:44,788
Into town. You wanna come?
410
00:27:44,801 --> 00:27:46,900
No, Steve should stay
here and get some rest.
411
00:27:46,901 --> 00:27:50,799
- Baby, I am so sorry about...
- Ah, it's OK.
412
00:27:50,800 --> 00:27:53,100
It's just... you're not
feeling well. You know?
413
00:27:53,101 --> 00:27:55,499
- Yeah.
- Yeah. Ooh! Ugh...
414
00:27:55,500 --> 00:27:57,499
Just... go lie down.
415
00:27:57,500 --> 00:27:59,999
K.
416
00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:01,700
Yeah.
417
00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:04,999
Have fun!
418
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:07,400
We won't!
419
00:28:09,700 --> 00:28:11,499
Max! Max! Pull in!
420
00:28:11,500 --> 00:28:13,500
Pull in here!
421
00:28:20,700 --> 00:28:23,698
Oh, Sarah, it looks like you're not
gonna get any sun this weekend.
422
00:28:23,699 --> 00:28:27,200
It's OK! I'll book you
a spray tan before the wedding.
423
00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:41,000
Hi. Are you guys lost?
424
00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:45,398
Oh, uh, no. We, um, are
actually here because...
425
00:28:45,399 --> 00:28:47,400
Have you kids seen any zombies.
426
00:28:47,401 --> 00:28:51,399
- Seriously?
- Yeah,
427
00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:54,599
we're looking for, uh,
a, uh, undead
428
00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:56,699
creature. Humanoid-lookin'.
429
00:28:56,700 --> 00:28:59,699
Possibly, uh, droolin' and, uh,
430
00:28:59,700 --> 00:29:01,887
eatin' people's brains.
OK, what my associate
431
00:29:01,900 --> 00:29:04,098
is trying to say
is that there has
432
00:29:04,099 --> 00:29:07,500
been a Stage 1 outbreak... Oh, come on,
Penny, we haven't got time for that.
433
00:29:07,501 --> 00:29:11,399
- I recognize you guys from somewhere!
- Here we go.
434
00:29:11,400 --> 00:29:14,799
No, I totally saw you guys
online!
435
00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:19,100
The only good zombie isa dead zombie.
436
00:29:22,500 --> 00:29:27,399
That's ridiculous!
437
00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:29,399
Fuck.
438
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:33,899
No, fuck you!
Ahhhhhhhhh! Fuck you!
439
00:29:33,900 --> 00:29:35,998
What were you doing
on a website called.
440
00:29:35,999 --> 00:29:38,498
- AWholes.com, Craig?
- You wanted to experiment!
441
00:29:38,499 --> 00:29:41,098
Never mind that. All right,
no, seriously, you guys are
442
00:29:41,099 --> 00:29:44,100
fucking hilarious! And you, dude,
you've got some real talent, all right?
443
00:29:44,101 --> 00:29:46,599
"Only good zombie's
a dead zombie!"
444
00:29:46,600 --> 00:29:49,599
So fuckin' cheese,
that is awesome, man!
445
00:29:49,600 --> 00:29:52,799
Eww, gross! What the fuck?!
446
00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:56,098
- What the fuck? You're the fuck!
- Craig, get in the car!
447
00:29:56,099 --> 00:29:59,998
Why the fuck do I gotta get in the car? He
should get in the car. Fucker spit on me!
448
00:29:59,999 --> 00:30:01,587
Just get in the car, Craig!
449
00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:03,198
Yeah, Craig get in the car.
Get in the van, Max.
450
00:30:03,199 --> 00:30:05,798
Don't tell me
to get in the van, Penny.
451
00:30:05,799 --> 00:30:08,798
Max, I need you to trust my judgment
right now and get in the van.
452
00:30:08,799 --> 00:30:10,438
You want me to get in the van?
I'll get in the fuckin' van.
453
00:30:10,451 --> 00:30:12,100
Thank you, Max!
454
00:30:12,101 --> 00:30:15,999
I'm sorry. Um, he's been
under a lot of stress lately.
455
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,619
- Right.
- Hey, Yeah?
456
00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:21,838
This is what I think of
your fuckin' judgment!
457
00:30:21,851 --> 00:30:24,699
Whoa! Max! Max, no!
458
00:30:24,700 --> 00:30:27,799
Oh, my God!
Haha-ha! Fucking hilarious!
459
00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:30,699
- Shut up!
- Max, what did you do?
460
00:30:30,700 --> 00:30:34,599
- Fuck...
- Oh, my God. This is bad.
461
00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:38,099
Uh... do you have
any, uh, crazy glue?
462
00:30:38,100 --> 00:30:41,799
- No. We have to go now.
- OK, no, I understand, um,
463
00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:44,699
but IF you see anything
464
00:30:44,700 --> 00:30:48,499
that's out of the ordinary,
you can give us a call
465
00:30:48,500 --> 00:30:51,600
right there. Penel...
that's me on the bottom there.
466
00:30:51,601 --> 00:30:54,999
And I also have this for you.
467
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,199
Um... if you could just help...
468
00:30:57,200 --> 00:31:03,499
It sticks. Can you grab that?
Yeah, no problem. Right here is... this!
469
00:31:03,500 --> 00:31:06,099
- Ah.
- It's complimentary,
470
00:31:06,100 --> 00:31:09,598
and you can just give it a read.
When you have a moment.
471
00:31:09,599 --> 00:31:11,700
- Uh-huh.
- Uh, sorry to bother you.
472
00:31:11,701 --> 00:31:14,599
- Yeah. OK, Bye.
- OK. Bye-bye.
473
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:16,899
Max! Wait!
474
00:31:16,900 --> 00:31:21,099
Wait! Max! Max!
475
00:31:21,100 --> 00:31:27,000
What a bunch of crazies. This is not funny!
Max, it's not funny!
476
00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:31,799
Undead creature?
477
00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:35,299
Humanoid-looking. Yeah.
478
00:31:35,300 --> 00:31:37,699
Probably drooling...
479
00:31:37,700 --> 00:31:43,099
and eating somebody's... Ohhhh!
480
00:31:43,100 --> 00:31:45,099
Eating somebody's brains.
481
00:31:45,100 --> 00:31:48,099
Ugh!
482
00:31:48,100 --> 00:31:49,700
Ugh!
483
00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:54,599
Brains?
484
00:31:54,600 --> 00:31:55,999
Ah!
485
00:31:56,000 --> 00:31:58,299
Mm!
486
00:31:58,300 --> 00:32:00,600
Mm!
487
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:05,799
I want brai... Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm!
488
00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:07,699
Mm-mmm! Mm-mmm! Mm-mmm!
489
00:32:07,700 --> 00:32:09,999
No I don't! No I don't!
490
00:32:10,000 --> 00:32:12,900
I want, um... I want a...!
491
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:17,200
Pecan pie!
492
00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:22,300
Mmm! Pecan pie! Mmm!
493
00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:27,699
Mmm! Yeah!
This is so delicious!
494
00:32:27,700 --> 00:32:31,000
Mmm! Mmm!
495
00:32:39,300 --> 00:32:41,700
Damn it! I want brains.
496
00:32:43,700 --> 00:32:45,399
Ugh!
497
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:48,399
Oh, God!
498
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:54,099
I'm a zombie!
I'm a god damned zombie.
499
00:32:54,100 --> 00:32:56,000
Tina's gonna kill me.
500
00:33:40,900 --> 00:33:43,000
No.
501
00:33:57,700 --> 00:33:59,800
Yes.
502
00:34:15,900 --> 00:34:18,299
Groovy.
503
00:34:18,300 --> 00:34:21,099
Ouch!
504
00:34:21,100 --> 00:34:24,300
Ahhhh... Whew!
505
00:34:28,100 --> 00:34:30,699
All right, you little bastards.
506
00:34:30,700 --> 00:34:33,099
Food chain ends here.
507
00:34:33,100 --> 00:34:35,100
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
508
00:34:35,101 --> 00:34:38,299
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
509
00:34:38,300 --> 00:34:41,299
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
510
00:34:41,300 --> 00:34:45,999
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
511
00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:48,000
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
512
00:34:48,001 --> 00:34:51,899
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
513
00:34:51,900 --> 00:34:55,200
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
514
00:34:59,300 --> 00:35:01,900
Ah!
515
00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:06,800
Ah!
516
00:35:11,900 --> 00:35:15,799
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
517
00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:19,399
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
518
00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:22,399
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
519
00:35:22,400 --> 00:35:26,399
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
520
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:29,899
Whoa oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
521
00:35:29,900 --> 00:35:32,000
Oh, my God, it's moving.
522
00:35:36,000 --> 00:35:37,500
Oh.
523
00:35:55,400 --> 00:35:57,599
I don't know, Muffins.
524
00:35:57,600 --> 00:36:00,899
Maybe I should just give up,
turn myself in.
525
00:36:00,900 --> 00:36:03,000
I'm a pretty crappy zombie.
526
00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:05,999
Come here.
527
00:36:06,000 --> 00:36:07,999
Come here, big guy.
528
00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:10,199
Ohhhh.
529
00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:11,999
Are you scared?
530
00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:16,400
Sorry I scared you, buddy. You thought
I was going to eat you, didn't you?
531
00:36:16,401 --> 00:36:19,599
Yeah, you thought
I was going to eat you.
532
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:21,600
You thought I was going
to eat your brain!
533
00:36:26,500 --> 00:36:30,199
Wooo!
534
00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:33,098
Did you take your fucking adrenaline?
Steve.
535
00:36:33,099 --> 00:36:36,600
I don't know how you think you're
gonna eat an entire watermelon...
536
00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:41,300
Hi!
537
00:36:45,500 --> 00:36:49,600
Let me get this straight. You
think that you are a zombie?
538
00:36:52,300 --> 00:36:54,287
Little bit.
539
00:36:54,300 --> 00:36:56,298
Tina, this is ridiculous!
Look at the pressure
540
00:36:56,299 --> 00:36:58,400
that you're putting on him
for this stupid wedding!
541
00:36:58,401 --> 00:37:02,599
What?! My rabbit just died!
542
00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:04,999
Oh, God,
it was a glorified rat!
543
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:08,200
Stop it! You heard the guy in the driveway.
They said they were looking for me.
544
00:37:08,201 --> 00:37:11,899
- Oh, God.
- Steve, this is the real world,
545
00:37:11,900 --> 00:37:15,400
OK? That guy was a psycho. There
are no such thing as zombies!
546
00:37:15,401 --> 00:37:20,099
Then how do you explain
the brains? Ugh! Damn it!
547
00:37:20,100 --> 00:37:23,999
Oh, my God. Gross!
My fianc� doesn't eat brains.
548
00:37:24,000 --> 00:37:25,599
Ugh.
549
00:37:25,600 --> 00:37:28,299
Can we please not say
that word?
550
00:37:28,300 --> 00:37:31,100
Actually, I think
he does eat... brains.
551
00:37:31,101 --> 00:37:33,499
- Ugh.
- Exhibit fuckin' A.
552
00:37:33,500 --> 00:37:36,099
Shut up! Shut up!
553
00:37:36,100 --> 00:37:38,198
Steve, we are getting married,
554
00:37:38,199 --> 00:37:40,198
and you are just freaking out.
555
00:37:40,199 --> 00:37:42,198
Lots of men do this
before the big day.
556
00:37:42,199 --> 00:37:46,600
- Honey, I obviously have a problem here.
- You have a problem?
557
00:37:46,601 --> 00:37:48,399
I have a problem!
558
00:37:48,400 --> 00:37:51,300
Do you know how many people are
coming to our wedding?
559
00:37:51,301 --> 00:37:55,599
How many meals I've skipped
to fit into that $5,000 dress?
560
00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:59,998
And now my fianc� tells me that he doesn't
want to marry me by killing my rabbit!
561
00:37:59,999 --> 00:38:01,998
Baby, listen to me.
I love you. Of course
562
00:38:01,999 --> 00:38:05,300
I'm going to marry you!
This isn't cold feet. I'm sick!
563
00:38:05,301 --> 00:38:09,299
Really? Really, Steve?
OK, if you're a zombie,
564
00:38:09,300 --> 00:38:11,498
then how come you're not
trying to eat my face?
565
00:38:11,499 --> 00:38:15,400
I don't know! I don't want to.
I couldn't hurt anybody.
566
00:38:15,401 --> 00:38:17,499
But baby, I...
567
00:38:17,500 --> 00:38:23,499
I really need to eat! I am
so freakin' hungry right now!
568
00:38:23,500 --> 00:38:27,400
I can't even eat regular food!
So what do we do? We find me
569
00:38:27,401 --> 00:38:30,199
something I can eat. That's it?
570
00:38:30,200 --> 00:38:32,399
Yes! It's not a big deal!
571
00:38:32,400 --> 00:38:34,699
I'm sorry, uh, no big deal?
572
00:38:34,700 --> 00:38:38,599
Dude, you're a fucking zombie!
This is a huge deal.
573
00:38:38,600 --> 00:38:41,700
All right, everybody,
let's just calm down.
574
00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:45,700
Craig, does that book say
anything about food?
575
00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:52,199
Page one.
576
00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:54,699
Mmm! All right!
577
00:38:54,700 --> 00:38:57,299
Just listen. I feel great.
578
00:38:57,300 --> 00:39:00,199
All right? I feel good,
I really do!
579
00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:04,299
I just need to find myself some...
Mmm!
580
00:39:04,300 --> 00:39:08,299
You know? So I'm gonna go
to the store and get them.
581
00:39:08,300 --> 00:39:10,599
We're coming with you.
582
00:39:10,600 --> 00:39:12,599
Thank you.
583
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:14,500
No!
584
00:39:16,500 --> 00:39:19,199
I'll go change.
585
00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:22,399
This is bullshit.
He's not a zombie.
586
00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:26,299
Of course he's not.
But I'm gonna call him on it.
587
00:39:26,300 --> 00:39:28,798
If he wants brains,
I will get him brains.
588
00:39:28,799 --> 00:39:33,000
I'll even mash them up and I will spoon
feed him if I have to. But afterwards,
589
00:39:33,001 --> 00:39:36,300
he's gonna tell me
what this is really about.
590
00:39:44,300 --> 00:39:50,199
- So... should I put this in the freezer?
- Really, Craig?
591
00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:52,700
Maybe a stew?
592
00:39:56,200 --> 00:39:59,299
Look at this place,
look at this!
593
00:39:59,300 --> 00:40:01,299
This looks great!
594
00:40:01,300 --> 00:40:04,599
Um... OK.
595
00:40:04,600 --> 00:40:08,099
- Creative Meats.
- Gross.
596
00:40:08,100 --> 00:40:10,199
- Ew.
- Don't be rude.
597
00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:13,700
I didn't realize meat was a
medium for expressing creativity.
598
00:40:25,300 --> 00:40:28,100
Oh, dude! What are ya...?
599
00:40:31,400 --> 00:40:36,499
Whoa. This place looks like a Civil
War field hospital or something.
600
00:40:36,500 --> 00:40:39,099
Craig, a little
positive thinking.
601
00:40:39,100 --> 00:40:42,399
Guys, look. Skunk meat!
602
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:45,699
- Fresh skunk meat!
- Ah!
603
00:40:45,700 --> 00:40:48,498
You look like a gal
with an adventurous palate.
604
00:40:48,499 --> 00:40:51,898
You know, raccoon is more subtle
than you might think, despite
605
00:40:51,899 --> 00:40:54,500
it's popular reputation
as a garbage feeder.
606
00:40:54,501 --> 00:40:57,699
Yes, ma'am,
I do love me some 'coon meat!
607
00:40:57,700 --> 00:41:00,300
Who doesn't? Ha-ha-ha-ha...
608
00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:06,800
Actually, we're looking for something, a...
little off the menu.
609
00:41:06,801 --> 00:41:09,499
Pardon me, sir,
610
00:41:09,500 --> 00:41:12,400
but this establishment does
not condone the sale
611
00:41:12,401 --> 00:41:15,699
of illegal firearms.
I am but a simple butcher.
612
00:41:15,700 --> 00:41:21,699
But, just out of curiosity, what type
and calibre are we talking about?
613
00:41:21,700 --> 00:41:23,400
Ohhh.
614
00:41:25,600 --> 00:41:28,199
No, actually, thank you.
615
00:41:28,200 --> 00:41:31,699
Um, we're actually looking
for some...
616
00:41:31,700 --> 00:41:34,299
brains.
617
00:41:34,300 --> 00:41:38,399
- And maybe some of that racoon meat.
- Eww!
618
00:41:38,400 --> 00:41:41,899
What? He made it...
he made it sound kinda good.
619
00:41:41,900 --> 00:41:44,299
Did I just hear you right, boy?
620
00:41:44,300 --> 00:41:47,400
Did you just ask me
for... brains?
621
00:41:49,900 --> 00:41:51,899
Yes.
622
00:41:51,900 --> 00:41:55,699
Well, hot dog!
I'm a brain man myself!
623
00:41:55,700 --> 00:41:58,599
Wa-hooo! This is
your lucky day, muchacho
624
00:41:58,600 --> 00:42:00,598
I don't get as much call
for brains,
625
00:42:00,599 --> 00:42:02,900
on account of the cholesterol.
But I'll tell ya,
626
00:42:02,901 --> 00:42:06,799
I'll take me a mass
of pan-fried calves' brains
627
00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:09,199
over a rack of ribs
10 out of 10!
628
00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:13,499
- Ugh!
- Sure. Ha-ha! Me too.
629
00:42:13,500 --> 00:42:16,200
These just came in
this morning.
630
00:42:18,900 --> 00:42:23,000
Ohhoho! This is messed up.
631
00:42:24,900 --> 00:42:26,898
Yeah, I'm gonna be in the car.
632
00:42:26,899 --> 00:42:29,400
Now, these little ones are
appetizer size.
633
00:42:29,401 --> 00:42:31,699
Great for holiday entertaining.
634
00:42:31,700 --> 00:42:35,600
We got squirrel, muskrat,
and those little ones there,
635
00:42:35,700 --> 00:42:39,300
them's rattlesnake.
Choice eating, those!
636
00:42:41,300 --> 00:42:45,399
- May I?
- I'm not big on free samples...
637
00:42:45,400 --> 00:42:47,700
but I don't get many chances
to eat brains
638
00:42:47,701 --> 00:42:51,500
with a fellow gourmand,
as it were, so...
639
00:42:54,300 --> 00:42:55,499
Cheers.
640
00:42:55,500 --> 00:42:57,499
Steve! That's enough.
641
00:42:57,500 --> 00:43:02,200
You're not actually gonna eat
that, are you? Oh, yeah.
642
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:07,500
I will be in the car.
643
00:43:07,600 --> 00:43:11,799
Well, I guess it's a table
for two, monsieur! Unless...
644
00:43:11,800 --> 00:43:14,599
Oh, no. No, I'm good.
645
00:43:14,600 --> 00:43:16,300
Yeah.
646
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:30,699
Mmm!
647
00:43:30,700 --> 00:43:33,699
Just like a little candy,
right, Stevie?
648
00:43:33,700 --> 00:43:35,699
They are delicious!
649
00:43:35,700 --> 00:43:40,700
You like 'em raw, too! A man
after my own heart. Mmm!
650
00:43:40,800 --> 00:43:47,099
- What are those ones there?
- Oh, these are simply divine! Here we got
651
00:43:47,100 --> 00:43:51,399
skunk, owl, Canadian
beaver, and rabbit.
652
00:43:51,400 --> 00:43:54,400
Oh, rabbit! Your favourite!
653
00:43:56,400 --> 00:43:59,600
- Too soon?
- Mm...
654
00:44:01,500 --> 00:44:02,899
And this...
655
00:44:02,900 --> 00:44:07,599
is la pi�ce de r�sistance.
This is
656
00:44:07,600 --> 00:44:11,399
genuine, Grade A, all-American
657
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:14,500
grizzly bear brain.
It is to die for.
658
00:44:14,600 --> 00:44:21,000
- It's beautiful.
- Grill this baby low and slow for...
659
00:44:23,100 --> 00:44:25,300
- Oh, my God.
- Yeah, he's gonna pay
660
00:44:25,301 --> 00:44:28,000
for that.
That's $19.99 a pound.
661
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:35,799
- Ahh. Ahhh!
- So?
662
00:44:35,800 --> 00:44:38,399
- How do you feel?
- OK.
663
00:44:38,400 --> 00:44:42,599
You know what? I feel OK.
664
00:44:42,600 --> 00:44:45,399
We'll take it.
We'll take it all.
665
00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:47,300
Yeah! Ha-ha-ha!
666
00:44:56,900 --> 00:45:00,599
See that? Good as new.
667
00:45:00,600 --> 00:45:03,700
You wanna kiss and make up?
668
00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:10,400
Pull over there.
669
00:45:12,800 --> 00:45:15,999
You want to stay here?
670
00:45:16,000 --> 00:45:19,498
Uh, listen. Between the crazy
glue and the painkillers
671
00:45:19,499 --> 00:45:21,538
for your foot, we have
gone way over budget, OK?
672
00:45:21,551 --> 00:45:23,600
So now we are roughing it.
673
00:45:23,601 --> 00:45:27,199
Don't even!
Fine. I like it rough.
674
00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:29,999
Then don't moisturize
your hand.
675
00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:33,699
OK, but you have to spit on it.
676
00:45:33,700 --> 00:45:36,000
I will glue that hand
to your face!
677
00:45:36,001 --> 00:45:38,999
Remove your hand.
678
00:45:39,000 --> 00:45:42,000
Kindly remove your hand right now.
Give me a little.
679
00:45:42,001 --> 00:45:46,499
That's real mature, Max.
680
00:45:46,500 --> 00:45:49,500
You have pushed me to my limit.
681
00:45:59,800 --> 00:46:03,799
Can you please not
do that right now?
682
00:46:03,800 --> 00:46:05,599
What?
683
00:46:05,600 --> 00:46:08,798
- Eat like a fuckin' zombie pig!
- Craig, you're not helping.
684
00:46:08,799 --> 00:46:11,800
No. I'm not, because I'm not
a zombie collaborator.
685
00:46:11,801 --> 00:46:14,699
SHUT UP! SHUT UP!
SHUT UP! SHUT UP!
686
00:46:14,700 --> 00:46:16,200
YOU SHUT UP! YOU SHUT UP!
687
00:46:16,201 --> 00:46:18,700
- Ow! What the fuck?!
- Oh, my God!
688
00:46:20,500 --> 00:46:23,699
- OK.
- Don't touch me right now!
689
00:46:23,700 --> 00:46:27,200
Look, I know this is a lot
to take in, but it's really
690
00:46:27,201 --> 00:46:29,499
- gonna be OK.
- Really? How?
691
00:46:29,500 --> 00:46:31,699
- Yeah, how?
- Here's an idea:
692
00:46:31,700 --> 00:46:33,698
Why don't we talk about this
in the cabin?
693
00:46:33,699 --> 00:46:36,000
Oh, no, I think we should talk
about this on the way home.
694
00:46:36,001 --> 00:46:40,200
- Yeah, I agree. I'll start packing.
- Guys! Wait!
695
00:46:42,100 --> 00:46:44,098
- Great. Thanks, Craig.
- Eat me!
696
00:46:44,099 --> 00:46:46,700
- What's that supposed to mean?
- Would you two just please
697
00:46:46,701 --> 00:46:48,999
- stop it!
- OK, damn it!
698
00:46:49,000 --> 00:46:53,098
I know that you're scared, all right?
I am too. I'm not afraid.
699
00:46:53,099 --> 00:46:55,598
There's no reason for us to be
treating each other like this.
700
00:46:55,599 --> 00:46:57,700
Now, I'm starting to feel
better. The hunger's not so bad
701
00:46:57,701 --> 00:47:00,599
anymore.
Now, someone please tell me
702
00:47:00,600 --> 00:47:03,200
where are my snake brains are.
They're in your hand.
703
00:47:03,201 --> 00:47:07,699
- Which hand?
- The one in the car.
704
00:47:07,700 --> 00:47:09,699
Oh, oh, my God!
705
00:47:09,700 --> 00:47:11,899
Oh, my God! I'm so sorry, baby!
706
00:47:11,900 --> 00:47:15,599
That's amazing!
I don't even feel that!
707
00:47:15,600 --> 00:47:18,600
- What do you mean?
- I don't feel it. At all.
708
00:47:18,601 --> 00:47:23,100
- It doesn't hurt?
- Nope! - Seriously?
709
00:47:27,900 --> 00:47:31,499
- It's fine! I'm OK!
- No pain?
710
00:47:31,500 --> 00:47:34,199
- Uh-uh.
- Let's do that again.
711
00:47:34,200 --> 00:47:36,099
- No!
- This is stupid!
712
00:47:36,100 --> 00:47:40,099
- No, its actually pretty cool.
- OK, you could warn me
713
00:47:40,100 --> 00:47:43,100
next time. Oh, look, you, uh, dropped
your little bag of snacks there.
714
00:47:43,101 --> 00:47:44,999
Let me get that for ya.
715
00:47:45,000 --> 00:47:49,699
- What the fuck, Craig!
- That was awesome!
716
00:47:49,700 --> 00:47:52,199
OK, that was a good one.
717
00:47:52,200 --> 00:47:55,598
No, but seriously,
we should get you to a hospital.
718
00:47:55,599 --> 00:47:59,098
Why? I mean, aside from the brains
and a little numbness, I'm fine.
719
00:47:59,099 --> 00:48:02,898
Besides, when it comes down to it, it's
really just a dietary restriction.
720
00:48:02,899 --> 00:48:05,098
Yeah, it's like that chick
I know, uh, what's her face?
721
00:48:05,099 --> 00:48:09,098
Um, she's allergic to gluten and shit.
What's her face? Fuck.
722
00:48:09,099 --> 00:48:12,700
It's me, you idiot! Your wife?
I'm gluten intolerant!
723
00:48:12,701 --> 00:48:15,299
Steve,
724
00:48:15,300 --> 00:48:19,599
I just want you to feel like
yourself again. I do, Tina.
725
00:48:19,600 --> 00:48:23,099
I feel great!
And you know what? I'm happy.
726
00:48:23,100 --> 00:48:26,999
And I'm in love with you.
727
00:48:27,000 --> 00:48:29,300
Ugh...
728
00:48:33,600 --> 00:48:36,299
- OK, we can stay.
- Seriously?
729
00:48:36,300 --> 00:48:39,600
Am I the only one
that sees a problem with this?
730
00:48:39,601 --> 00:48:42,200
You can't feel pain!
You eat brains!
731
00:48:42,300 --> 00:48:45,199
I don't even want
to eat brains...
732
00:48:45,200 --> 00:48:47,599
that much. Look, I promise,
733
00:48:47,600 --> 00:48:51,100
the first second that I feel
bad, we'll go home. All right?
734
00:48:51,101 --> 00:48:53,399
Fine. But for the record,
735
00:48:53,400 --> 00:48:55,299
this is a bad idea.
736
00:48:55,300 --> 00:48:58,699
Lets just try to have some fun.
737
00:48:58,700 --> 00:49:01,700
Oh!?
738
00:49:04,100 --> 00:49:05,299
Woo!
739
00:49:05,300 --> 00:49:08,999
...Go away
740
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:11,400
Even though
I didn't want to let go
741
00:49:11,401 --> 00:49:15,200
Why can't you see
that what you're looking for
742
00:49:15,300 --> 00:49:18,199
Oh! Huh
743
00:49:18,200 --> 00:49:20,099
Hey!
744
00:49:20,100 --> 00:49:22,899
And you're never gonna
let it show
745
00:49:22,900 --> 00:49:24,100
Ah!
746
00:49:26,700 --> 00:49:30,699
...Girl like you
747
00:49:30,700 --> 00:49:34,100
You you you you
you you you you
748
00:49:50,000 --> 00:49:52,899
No, no, I don't miss you now
749
00:49:52,900 --> 00:49:55,699
But I will never find
another one
750
00:49:55,700 --> 00:49:58,299
No, no,
you don't miss me now
751
00:49:58,300 --> 00:50:01,899
But you will never...
- Woo!
752
00:50:01,900 --> 00:50:04,399
- Oh, my God!
- Yeah!
753
00:50:04,400 --> 00:50:08,100
- ...Never find another one.
- I feel great!
754
00:50:13,100 --> 00:50:16,100
Oh, my God!
755
00:50:34,000 --> 00:50:36,999
Oh, kill me!
756
00:50:37,000 --> 00:50:39,698
That's it, we have to get him
to the hospital.
757
00:50:39,699 --> 00:50:42,998
He's fine. Look at all
the stuff he did today.
758
00:50:42,999 --> 00:50:45,898
Tina, he's not a superhero;
He's undead!
759
00:50:45,899 --> 00:50:48,338
I think he's getting worse.
How could this be worse?
760
00:50:48,351 --> 00:50:50,800
Look. Right here it says:
761
00:50:50,801 --> 00:50:55,199
"The undead host must consume
living "human cerebral tissue.
762
00:50:55,200 --> 00:50:58,300
Any dead or non-human tissue
will eventually be rejected."
763
00:50:58,301 --> 00:51:00,999
WhWhWhat are you talking about?
764
00:51:01,000 --> 00:51:05,298
Animal brains are like junk food. It's like
he's yakking up zombie mini doughnuts.
765
00:51:05,299 --> 00:51:07,498
Why didn't you tell us
about this before?
766
00:51:07,499 --> 00:51:11,100
What? I hadn't gotten that far.
Look at how thick this bitch is!
767
00:51:11,101 --> 00:51:14,499
Nooo, my Steve is gonna be OK.
768
00:51:14,500 --> 00:51:16,999
He's gonna be OK.
He's gonna be OK
769
00:51:17,000 --> 00:51:19,198
just in time for the wedding.
Tina,
770
00:51:19,199 --> 00:51:22,700
if this keeps up, by next week
we'll be at his funeral.
771
00:51:26,300 --> 00:51:29,000
Oh, hey, buddy.
You get it all out?
772
00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:34,999
Oh, my God, Steve.
773
00:51:35,000 --> 00:51:37,400
You look like death!
That's it, Tina.
774
00:51:37,401 --> 00:51:42,399
We have to take him to the
hospital now! Enough!
775
00:51:42,400 --> 00:51:44,999
He's fine. He's fine!
776
00:51:45,000 --> 00:51:49,899
We are not taking him to some
back-water hospital. He's fine.
777
00:51:49,900 --> 00:51:52,799
You just need some rest,
right, baby?
778
00:51:52,800 --> 00:51:55,399
You just need some rest,
that's all.
779
00:51:55,400 --> 00:51:59,299
- Ahhh... Ah!
- Oh, my God!
780
00:51:59,300 --> 00:52:03,298
- Holy fuck, dude! That is your ear!
- OK, I draw the line at things
781
00:52:03,299 --> 00:52:05,898
falling off my brother's face.
Craig, get the car.
782
00:52:05,899 --> 00:52:07,437
Finally. See you guys, later.
783
00:52:07,450 --> 00:52:08,998
No, they're coming with us.
Son of a fuck!
784
00:52:08,999 --> 00:52:11,198
No! We are not going anywhere!
785
00:52:11,199 --> 00:52:14,300
Craig, go upstairs right now
and get my cosmetic kit.
786
00:52:14,301 --> 00:52:17,599
- Right.
- This is fucked.
787
00:52:17,600 --> 00:52:20,400
Honey, I see women
that are way worse come
788
00:52:20,401 --> 00:52:22,999
into my salon,
and you know what?
789
00:52:23,000 --> 00:52:28,199
After I'm done with them,
they're like, like new people!
790
00:52:28,200 --> 00:52:32,399
- I'm in pretty bad shape, Tina.
- Look at me.
791
00:52:32,400 --> 00:52:36,900
You and I are going to be doing the chicken
dance with my Nonna at our wedding
792
00:52:36,901 --> 00:52:38,999
in one week. OK?
793
00:52:39,000 --> 00:52:41,999
But right now
my man looks like shit,
794
00:52:42,000 --> 00:52:45,000
so we have some work to do.
795
00:52:48,300 --> 00:52:50,300
Sarah, go get me a paper towel.
796
00:52:50,301 --> 00:52:53,299
- Tina, you're not seri...
- Now!
797
00:52:53,300 --> 00:52:55,299
Craig,
798
00:52:55,300 --> 00:52:58,200
I need you to take Steve's ear
and rinse it off.
799
00:52:58,201 --> 00:53:00,900
- Fuck that noise!
- Craig!
800
00:53:02,300 --> 00:53:03,899
What's that?
801
00:53:03,900 --> 00:53:07,000
Oh, it's eyelash adhesive.
Yeah.
802
00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:12,899
- Oh...
- Oh!
803
00:53:12,900 --> 00:53:14,899
What?
804
00:53:14,900 --> 00:53:21,599
Just say they're piercings. I'm not
fucking touching it. Ugh... OK...
805
00:53:21,600 --> 00:53:23,300
Heh-heh...
806
00:53:26,300 --> 00:53:30,599
Now, just... hold... still.
807
00:53:30,600 --> 00:53:34,600
OK? And... Ugh!
808
00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:18,700
RESYNC BY BSpidey87.
809
00:53:34,600 --> 00:53:39,100
Ahhhhh!
Ahhh, I feel like Frankenstein.
810
00:53:44,200 --> 00:53:46,399
Thank you for being so sweet.
811
00:53:46,400 --> 00:53:51,299
Honey, I'm not giving up on you
because of some eating disorder
812
00:53:51,300 --> 00:53:54,599
or, or a missing ear.
813
00:53:54,600 --> 00:53:59,999
This wouldn't even turn a head at my
family dinner table. I love you, baby.
814
00:54:00,000 --> 00:54:03,399
OK, now, stay straight.
815
00:54:03,400 --> 00:54:05,400
You don't want to have
crooked ears.
816
00:54:05,401 --> 00:54:07,999
No. 'Cause my man has
perfect ears.
817
00:54:08,000 --> 00:54:11,600
As long as he looks fine
for your fucking wedding.
818
00:54:15,000 --> 00:54:19,099
Craig, can you come here
for a sec?
819
00:54:19,100 --> 00:54:21,999
What?
820
00:54:22,000 --> 00:54:24,499
- Hold this.
- Gross!
821
00:54:24,500 --> 00:54:26,499
Don't move, either of you.
822
00:54:26,500 --> 00:54:30,499
Sarah, can I talk to you
in the other room for a second?
823
00:54:30,500 --> 00:54:33,599
- You sure can.
- Great.
824
00:54:33,600 --> 00:54:38,100
Whoa, wait. Where are you guys going?
We'll be back.
825
00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:43,099
So, uh... zombie dick?
826
00:54:43,100 --> 00:54:47,298
- Yeah, its pretty bad.
- So, what now, Tina? You want to talk
827
00:54:47,299 --> 00:54:50,300
about the fringe
on my matron of honour dress?
828
00:54:50,301 --> 00:54:52,499
All right, that is... it!
829
00:54:52,500 --> 00:54:55,999
What the fuck?!
You just punched my tit!
830
00:54:56,000 --> 00:54:58,038
Come on, tough girl. You
got a problem with me?
831
00:54:58,051 --> 00:55:00,100
Let's see what you... Oww!
832
00:55:00,101 --> 00:55:03,399
Ow! Jesus!
You punch like a man!
833
00:55:03,400 --> 00:55:06,099
What the hell is your problem?!
834
00:55:06,100 --> 00:55:07,638
I just want us to get
this out of our systems
835
00:55:07,651 --> 00:55:09,200
so that we can work
together and help Steve.
836
00:55:09,201 --> 00:55:12,999
So you punch me in the tit?!
What are you, 12?
837
00:55:13,000 --> 00:55:16,198
You're kind of a bad ass,
so I... I needed an advantage.
838
00:55:16,199 --> 00:55:18,498
Yeah? Well, this bad ass is
about to kick your ass!
839
00:55:18,499 --> 00:55:21,400
If you're done playing zombie
makeover with him,
840
00:55:21,500 --> 00:55:24,100
we can actually get him some
god damn professional help.
841
00:55:24,101 --> 00:55:26,400
What the...?
842
00:55:29,800 --> 00:55:31,800
Yeah, and those people
that came by,
843
00:55:31,801 --> 00:55:35,499
they seem like real humanitarians.
Tina! Sarah!
844
00:55:35,500 --> 00:55:39,099
- Don't move that ear!
- Yeah, Steve. This is hot.
845
00:55:39,100 --> 00:55:41,700
I'm sick of you and your
Little Miss Perfect bullshit!
846
00:55:41,701 --> 00:55:46,400
- Ugh! - Girls!
- Just a bit longer.
847
00:55:50,100 --> 00:55:52,099
Don't you even!
848
00:55:52,100 --> 00:55:54,100
Ah! Stop it!
849
00:55:57,600 --> 00:56:00,499
I hate you!
850
00:56:00,500 --> 00:56:03,200
- You!
- Bitch!
851
00:56:11,700 --> 00:56:17,200
- Emo slut!
- Plastic whore!
852
00:56:20,200 --> 00:56:22,499
Enough! Tina!
853
00:56:22,500 --> 00:56:25,299
Try talking to Sarah!
854
00:56:25,300 --> 00:56:28,699
- Fine! Sarah, you're a bitch!
- Tina!
855
00:56:28,700 --> 00:56:32,198
Stop using judgemental language,
get to the heart of your conflict,
856
00:56:32,199 --> 00:56:35,098
and empathize with her point
of view. And Sarah,
857
00:56:35,099 --> 00:56:39,400
stop being so defensively aggressive
and be an active listener.
858
00:56:39,401 --> 00:56:43,399
OK. Sarah, I know
how much you love your brother,
859
00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:47,700
and I know that you don't think that
I'm right for him. But I love him.
860
00:56:50,500 --> 00:56:52,099
Right now,
861
00:56:52,100 --> 00:56:54,598
he's Steve. But if we don't
come up with something,
862
00:56:54,599 --> 00:56:56,600
he's gonna turn into a monster.
863
00:56:56,601 --> 00:56:59,399
He already is, you morons!
864
00:56:59,400 --> 00:57:03,799
Look at him. He needs... - brains.
Ugh.
865
00:57:03,800 --> 00:57:06,199
Ah, gross.
866
00:57:06,200 --> 00:57:09,599
OK... Craig is right.
867
00:57:09,600 --> 00:57:12,398
Of course I'm right.
The book says I'm right.
868
00:57:12,399 --> 00:57:14,498
And they're gonna have
to be human too.
869
00:57:14,499 --> 00:57:17,600
But maybe I just need a bit. Just
enough so that I can function.
870
00:57:17,601 --> 00:57:20,099
What do you have in mind?
871
00:57:20,100 --> 00:57:22,099
I'm going to go into town.
872
00:57:22,100 --> 00:57:25,398
I'm going to find somebody
that won't be missed.
873
00:57:25,399 --> 00:57:27,500
And I'm gonna eat
their fucking brains.
874
00:57:34,200 --> 00:57:35,599
Come on.
875
00:57:35,600 --> 00:57:37,599
That's rich.
876
00:57:37,600 --> 00:57:39,499
No, you're not.
877
00:57:39,500 --> 00:57:42,099
- There's no way, Steve.
- What?
878
00:57:42,100 --> 00:57:44,400
Honey, I just accidentally
pulled your ear off.
879
00:57:44,401 --> 00:57:48,400
You're in no condition to hunt.
Well, what then?
880
00:57:50,900 --> 00:57:53,500
I have an idea.
881
00:58:06,700 --> 00:58:09,500
Jesus! Fff!
882
00:58:09,600 --> 00:58:11,698
Look what you've done
to our women, Steve.
883
00:58:11,699 --> 00:58:14,198
And who the fuck packs
hooker boots for a weekend
884
00:58:14,199 --> 00:58:17,298
at the cottage? I do, and you don't
have to be involved if you're afraid.
885
00:58:17,299 --> 00:58:20,698
We're just afraid that you girls
are gonna get into trouble.
886
00:58:20,699 --> 00:58:23,898
- Honey, everything is gonna be fine.
- Family takes care of family.
887
00:58:23,899 --> 00:58:27,198
Yeah, and we're family, all
right... the fuckin' Manson family!
888
00:58:27,199 --> 00:58:31,800
So what are you girls gonna do Bring
back some sorry prick so he can eat him.
889
00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:35,899
- Wow. Thug life. Great.
- Steve,
890
00:58:35,900 --> 00:58:39,499
if we get someone,
can you go through with this?
891
00:58:39,500 --> 00:58:41,600
I'm sure my zombie instincts
will just kick in.
892
00:58:41,700 --> 00:58:44,900
But get somebody really old.
Or like a real asshole.
893
00:58:44,901 --> 00:58:47,499
How about a really old asshole?
894
00:58:47,500 --> 00:58:49,898
Do you want a man
or do you want a woman?
895
00:58:49,899 --> 00:58:52,498
Oh. A man. Definitely. I don't
think I could eat a woman.
896
00:58:52,499 --> 00:58:55,598
Gay. Way to go, Steve.
You're the first gay-ass zombie.
897
00:58:55,599 --> 00:58:57,600
You're really breaking
a lot of ground this weekend.
898
00:58:57,601 --> 00:59:00,899
Craig, shut up.
Seriously, we have to...
899
00:59:00,900 --> 00:59:03,898
we have to get someone that
you're gonna hate so you can...
900
00:59:03,899 --> 00:59:06,200
I dunno, kill them
without remorse.
901
00:59:06,201 --> 00:59:08,399
Like a... like a pedophile
902
00:59:08,400 --> 00:59:09,999
or a meth dealer.
903
00:59:10,000 --> 00:59:12,598
Or a hipster.
I really hate hipsters.
904
00:59:12,599 --> 00:59:16,700
- Or a parking cop. I hate those bastards.
- I hate the Portuguese.
905
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:23,399
Uh... um, anyways,
you just need to make sure
906
00:59:23,400 --> 00:59:25,798
you're ready to do what you have
to do when we come back.
907
00:59:25,799 --> 00:59:29,000
- Craig'll help you get ready.
- What? Fuck that!
908
00:59:29,001 --> 00:59:30,900
Come on.
909
00:59:33,400 --> 00:59:36,900
So, if, uh, things don't work
out between you and Tina,
910
00:59:36,901 --> 00:59:39,499
and you decide
to marry a gay zombie,
911
00:59:39,500 --> 00:59:43,799
I do support your decision. But
I wont be at the reception,
912
00:59:43,800 --> 00:59:46,198
because I don't eat
cock or brains.
913
00:59:46,199 --> 00:59:49,700
- Yeah, you're hilarious there!
- Yeah, so I RSVP "no"
914
00:59:49,800 --> 00:59:53,699
to gay zombie wedding. Yup.
915
00:59:53,700 --> 00:59:55,700
So long, Muffins.
916
01:00:02,500 --> 01:00:07,600
This place reminds me of where my parents
would take me camping every summer.
917
01:00:11,000 --> 01:00:16,499
My father... sent me
to a survival camp
918
01:00:16,500 --> 01:00:21,600
in the Philippines
when I was nine.
919
01:00:21,700 --> 01:00:25,698
They, uh, dropped me in the jungle
in the middle of a monsoon.
920
01:00:25,699 --> 01:00:27,900
I had to survive
for seven days.
921
01:00:27,901 --> 01:00:30,499
Your father did that to you?
922
01:00:30,500 --> 01:00:32,599
It was my birthday.
923
01:00:32,600 --> 01:00:35,899
I'm tellin' ya, though,
924
01:00:35,900 --> 01:00:39,699
those seven days...
made me tough.
925
01:00:39,700 --> 01:00:45,500
Tough enough to take anything that
comes my way. Alive or undead.
926
01:00:48,000 --> 01:00:50,400
Max, why do you hate zombies
so much?
927
01:00:50,401 --> 01:00:53,039
I mean, what if your mother
turned into a zombie?
928
01:00:53,052 --> 01:00:55,700
What would you do?
929
01:00:55,800 --> 01:00:57,900
Shoot her in the face.
930
01:00:59,800 --> 01:01:03,100
You would not shoot your mother
in the face if she was in a coma.
931
01:01:03,101 --> 01:01:05,999
No. If she was in a coma,
932
01:01:06,000 --> 01:01:09,900
she wouldn't be trying to turn my
head into a god damned fondue pot.
933
01:01:09,901 --> 01:01:11,899
Right.
934
01:01:11,900 --> 01:01:15,699
Well, if we find
this resistant host,
935
01:01:15,700 --> 01:01:18,599
we could find a vaccine.
936
01:01:18,600 --> 01:01:21,099
You'd be a hero, Max.
937
01:01:21,100 --> 01:01:23,398
You're right,
I am a god damn hero.
938
01:01:23,399 --> 01:01:25,988
I'm tired of waiting for your
orb to tell us what to do.
939
01:01:26,001 --> 01:01:28,600
We're gonna do this my way!
940
01:01:28,700 --> 01:01:30,699
Uh, where are we going?
941
01:01:30,700 --> 01:01:32,700
To get some bait.
942
01:01:45,000 --> 01:01:47,699
Him? He looks old.
943
01:01:47,700 --> 01:01:50,700
Kinda. He looks like he
could have Alzheimer's.
944
01:01:50,701 --> 01:01:53,499
Is that contagious?
This is just evil!
945
01:01:53,500 --> 01:01:56,499
Suck it up, Sarah.
Your brother needs us.
946
01:01:56,500 --> 01:02:00,799
Look. Soul patch.
947
01:02:00,800 --> 01:02:03,798
That guy's a douche for sure.
He's too fat.
948
01:02:03,799 --> 01:02:07,998
He's like a walking bucket of chicken.
I'm gonna throw up.
949
01:02:07,999 --> 01:02:10,998
Sarah, you need to take that
terrified look off your face,
950
01:02:10,999 --> 01:02:14,898
OK? We're not gonna get anyone
unless you throw out a certain vibe.
951
01:02:14,899 --> 01:02:17,600
- What kind of vibe?
- Watch and learn.
952
01:02:20,900 --> 01:02:23,799
Wow. That's sexy.
953
01:02:23,800 --> 01:02:26,399
I know, right? OK, now you try.
954
01:02:26,400 --> 01:02:28,600
Relax,
throw your shoulders back,
955
01:02:28,601 --> 01:02:31,699
and wipe that look
off your face.
956
01:02:31,700 --> 01:02:33,600
OK, how's this look?
957
01:02:36,500 --> 01:02:39,898
- Like you're having a pap smear.
- Ugh! This isn't going to work!
958
01:02:39,899 --> 01:02:41,837
We can do this, Sarah!
959
01:02:41,850 --> 01:02:43,798
I just don't know how
we're gonna pick somebody.
960
01:02:43,799 --> 01:02:46,400
We'll figure it out. You know,
just keep our eyes open
961
01:02:46,401 --> 01:02:51,399
and eventually somebody'll
just end up in our laps.
962
01:02:51,400 --> 01:02:52,900
Oh, my God!
963
01:02:57,200 --> 01:02:59,999
- What the fuck! My car!
- Tina.
964
01:03:00,000 --> 01:03:02,500
Look.
965
01:03:04,900 --> 01:03:09,600
Big scary guy is
checking us out. Hi.
966
01:03:16,200 --> 01:03:20,200
Huh. That big scary guy...
967
01:03:22,600 --> 01:03:25,699
is a dead man. Hey.
968
01:03:25,700 --> 01:03:27,800
Are you crazy?
969
01:03:29,700 --> 01:03:31,800
She's crazy.
970
01:03:37,700 --> 01:03:40,799
OK. So, apparently,
eight bones make up
971
01:03:40,800 --> 01:03:43,799
the neurocranium.
So it's like a bone vault
972
01:03:43,800 --> 01:03:46,198
for the brain and brain stem.
This part over here
973
01:03:46,199 --> 01:03:48,998
is the parietal.
So, this little sucker is
974
01:03:48,999 --> 01:03:51,798
like a quarter of an inch thick
and hard as shit.
975
01:03:51,799 --> 01:03:54,698
All right, so you're gonna have
to Babe Ruth smash the shit
976
01:03:54,699 --> 01:03:57,700
out of this thing so you can have
access to the cerebral cortex.
977
01:03:57,701 --> 01:04:00,899
Got it. Oh, that smells good.
978
01:04:00,900 --> 01:04:02,799
Mmm!
979
01:04:02,800 --> 01:04:05,699
- What the fuck, dude!
- What?
980
01:04:05,700 --> 01:04:08,000
You just smelled
my fucking brain!
981
01:04:08,001 --> 01:04:11,699
No. Let's not jump
to conclusions here.
982
01:04:11,700 --> 01:04:13,598
No, all right,
you're a fucking monster!
983
01:04:13,599 --> 01:04:15,188
Craig!
984
01:04:15,201 --> 01:04:16,881
Just stay the fuck
away from me, all right?
985
01:04:16,900 --> 01:04:19,899
Gay-ass zombie!
986
01:04:19,900 --> 01:04:21,900
God damn!
987
01:04:31,100 --> 01:04:35,299
Wow! That is so... hot!
988
01:04:35,300 --> 01:04:40,199
My, uh... woman
parts like you too.
989
01:04:40,200 --> 01:04:45,199
Ha-ha-ha... Ugh, how
is he still standing?
990
01:04:45,200 --> 01:04:48,199
He's had enough booze
to knock out a rhino!
991
01:04:48,200 --> 01:04:52,098
Don't worry, it's OK. I have a plan.
Just get him in the back seat.
992
01:04:52,099 --> 01:04:54,900
Are you fucking joking me?
No fucking way!
993
01:04:54,901 --> 01:04:59,599
- Don't worry, he's harmless.
- Oh, yeah!
994
01:04:59,600 --> 01:05:01,899
Oh, yeah!
995
01:05:01,900 --> 01:05:04,900
Oh, my God!
996
01:05:08,600 --> 01:05:12,598
Come on! I need you to suck it
up, and be sexy, and get him
997
01:05:12,599 --> 01:05:15,700
in the back seat! Come on!
Go! Get outta here!
998
01:05:19,000 --> 01:05:22,200
Hey... big man.
999
01:05:22,300 --> 01:05:23,999
So...
1000
01:05:24,000 --> 01:05:29,800
so, you wanna, you wanna go for a ride?
Stud monkey.
1001
01:05:33,000 --> 01:05:35,599
You make Mommy so horny!
1002
01:05:35,600 --> 01:05:38,199
What?
1003
01:05:38,200 --> 01:05:42,299
Nothing, nothing, nothing.
Go ahead, get in.
1004
01:05:42,300 --> 01:05:44,699
Hey, there.
1005
01:05:44,700 --> 01:05:46,899
Whoa, whoa, wait, wait.
1006
01:05:46,900 --> 01:05:51,699
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... Ahhh!
1007
01:05:51,700 --> 01:05:55,099
You have a pink
1008
01:05:55,100 --> 01:05:57,999
stun gun?
Yeah. It's cute, right?
1009
01:05:58,000 --> 01:06:00,199
OK, lets go! I'll drive!
1010
01:06:00,200 --> 01:06:03,300
Wait! What about me?
1011
01:06:07,700 --> 01:06:09,899
Pizza, pizza, pizza!
1012
01:06:09,900 --> 01:06:11,899
Ha-ho! Pizza!
1013
01:06:11,900 --> 01:06:14,899
Pizza, pizza!
1014
01:06:14,900 --> 01:06:18,299
Max.
1015
01:06:18,300 --> 01:06:20,299
Pizza, pizza, pizza!
1016
01:06:20,300 --> 01:06:23,699
Ha-ha! Evening, young lady.
1017
01:06:23,700 --> 01:06:28,199
- Hello! Are you, uh, Captain Cletus?
- Where's the pizza?
1018
01:06:28,200 --> 01:06:30,799
The...
1019
01:06:30,800 --> 01:06:34,799
No, uh, sorry. We are actually
here for something else.
1020
01:06:34,800 --> 01:06:37,398
Ma'am, if you are implying
I might be in possession
1021
01:06:37,399 --> 01:06:39,400
of illegal firearms, I will
kindly ask you to leave...
1022
01:06:39,401 --> 01:06:42,999
No, we don't want guns,
Admiral Redneck.
1023
01:06:43,000 --> 01:06:46,199
- We need brains.
- Uh... Max.
1024
01:06:46,200 --> 01:06:51,298
Ya'll have a good night, now.
No wait, OK,
1025
01:06:51,299 --> 01:06:54,698
all we want is brains.
Sorry, Missy, no can do.
1026
01:06:54,699 --> 01:06:57,698
Somebody cleaned me out
earlier today. Who?
1027
01:06:57,699 --> 01:07:00,098
- Bunch of kids. Now beat it.
- No, wait!
1028
01:07:00,099 --> 01:07:02,398
Can you tell us
anything else about them?
1029
01:07:02,399 --> 01:07:06,098
Couple o' pretty-looking ladies was
hanging with some queer-looking feller
1030
01:07:06,099 --> 01:07:08,998
and another that couldn't get
enough of my brains! Now, git!
1031
01:07:08,999 --> 01:07:11,000
That's our zombie, Penny.
Come on.
1032
01:07:11,001 --> 01:07:13,199
The cottage! No, Max, wait!
1033
01:07:13,200 --> 01:07:16,000
If the infected one hasn't eaten
the others yet, it must mean
1034
01:07:16,001 --> 01:07:20,899
that he's resisting the infection!
Which is wonderful!
1035
01:07:20,900 --> 01:07:23,299
Shit! Where is that cottage?
1036
01:07:23,300 --> 01:07:26,198
Hey, man, did you order
the Vegetarian Nightmare?
1037
01:07:26,199 --> 01:07:29,900
Extra Polish sausage,
German sausage, Belgian Sausage,
1038
01:07:29,901 --> 01:07:32,900
- Russian sausage...
- Nope.
1039
01:07:36,100 --> 01:07:38,099
Fuckin' hate this job.
1040
01:07:38,100 --> 01:07:40,299
Ugh!
1041
01:07:40,300 --> 01:07:43,699
Oh, God. Ugh!
1042
01:07:43,700 --> 01:07:46,799
OK.
1043
01:07:46,800 --> 01:07:49,799
Oh, God. Ugh!
1044
01:07:49,800 --> 01:07:53,699
- What the hell!
- I have been worried sick!
1045
01:07:53,700 --> 01:07:57,799
Shut up, Steve! Oh, baby,
you look kinda better,
1046
01:07:57,800 --> 01:08:01,000
that's good, but shut up. You
need to help us carry this in.
1047
01:08:01,001 --> 01:08:02,899
This is ridiculous.
1048
01:08:02,900 --> 01:08:05,300
We need a dolly or something.
Where's Craig?
1049
01:08:05,301 --> 01:08:08,799
Uh... sleeping, I think.
1050
01:08:08,800 --> 01:08:11,199
- Sleeping?!
- What?
1051
01:08:11,200 --> 01:08:13,799
Yeah! I can help.
1052
01:08:13,800 --> 01:08:16,199
- OK.
- Come on.
1053
01:08:16,200 --> 01:08:18,399
OK, I'll take his legs, or...
1054
01:08:18,400 --> 01:08:23,199
Oh, my God!
How did you get this guy?!
1055
01:08:23,200 --> 01:08:25,499
Oh, God. Oh, God.
1056
01:08:25,500 --> 01:08:28,099
- Holy crap!
- This is ridiculous!
1057
01:08:28,100 --> 01:08:31,100
Are you girls pulling?
Yeah. Oh, my God!
1058
01:08:31,101 --> 01:08:34,100
Fuckin' freak family.
1059
01:08:38,500 --> 01:08:41,899
OK, we softened him up for you.
1060
01:08:41,900 --> 01:08:45,999
- That guy is huge!
- I know, honey, but he's out cold.
1061
01:08:46,000 --> 01:08:48,198
Are you ready?
Oh this is crazy.
1062
01:08:48,199 --> 01:08:52,000
You girls just kidnapped a guy!
And now you're gonna eat him!
1063
01:08:52,001 --> 01:08:56,399
OK, listen to me.
This is very important.
1064
01:08:56,400 --> 01:08:58,899
This is our new lifestyle, OK?
1065
01:08:58,900 --> 01:09:01,000
And if we're gonna walk
down the aisle together,
1066
01:09:01,001 --> 01:09:03,799
then we both just need
to embrace this.
1067
01:09:03,800 --> 01:09:07,300
OK, all right. He's all tied
up and he's still out of it.
1068
01:09:07,301 --> 01:09:10,399
I wouldn't wait too long.
1069
01:09:10,400 --> 01:09:13,100
All right. I'm gonna go
downstairs and eat this guy!
1070
01:09:13,101 --> 01:09:15,500
- OK.
- Thank you!
1071
01:09:15,600 --> 01:09:17,998
You've both have been
so incredible.
1072
01:09:17,999 --> 01:09:21,298
I'm so happy to see the two
of you working together so well.
1073
01:09:21,299 --> 01:09:23,300
You know, I think if this
weekend has taught us anything...
1074
01:09:23,301 --> 01:09:26,199
- Steve, just GO!
- Wah!
1075
01:09:26,200 --> 01:09:29,600
- Love you!
- Wait, wait, wait! Here!
1076
01:09:31,900 --> 01:09:33,999
Oh, my God!
1077
01:09:34,000 --> 01:09:36,300
Boots are killing me!
1078
01:10:02,900 --> 01:10:04,900
Oof! Ugh!
1079
01:10:11,900 --> 01:10:17,399
OK... I can smell
his undead ass.
1080
01:10:17,400 --> 01:10:20,999
Max, we haven't gotten
a reading from the orb.
1081
01:10:21,000 --> 01:10:24,599
We've been driving around
in circles for hours.
1082
01:10:24,600 --> 01:10:28,300
OK, you have all the bells and
whistles in here. You have this!
1083
01:10:28,301 --> 01:10:30,599
Who do you even talk to
in this?
1084
01:10:30,600 --> 01:10:33,299
And yet you don't have
a NAV system!
1085
01:10:33,300 --> 01:10:35,198
I don't need
a fucking computer.
1086
01:10:35,199 --> 01:10:39,098
I'm a fucking professional! I
can feel when they're close by.
1087
01:10:39,099 --> 01:10:41,100
I don't need a fucking piece
of technology.
1088
01:10:41,101 --> 01:10:43,299
You're a stone-cold killer.
1089
01:10:43,300 --> 01:10:46,288
You're a stone-cold killer.
You're a stone-cold killer.
1090
01:10:46,301 --> 01:10:49,299
Get it.
1091
01:10:49,300 --> 01:10:53,999
- You're a stone-cold... - Hello?
- Hey. Uh, y-you guys came by
1092
01:10:54,000 --> 01:10:59,599
my place today. It's my friend, he's
turned into a zombie. OK, uh, uh,
1093
01:10:59,600 --> 01:11:02,499
calm down, and, uh,
where are you?
1094
01:11:02,500 --> 01:11:04,999
Uh, it's 42 Clear Lake Drive.
1095
01:11:05,000 --> 01:11:07,100
- 42 Clear Lake Drive.
- Who is it?
1096
01:11:07,101 --> 01:11:09,699
- Oh, we're close!
- Who is it?!
1097
01:11:09,700 --> 01:11:13,298
You're just going to do tests,
you're not gonna hurt him?
1098
01:11:13,299 --> 01:11:16,298
Your gonna make him back to
normal again, right? Of course.
1099
01:11:16,299 --> 01:11:18,698
He's gonna be in good hands...
You're fucking right
1100
01:11:18,699 --> 01:11:20,698
he'll be in good hands.
Who the fuck is this?
1101
01:11:20,699 --> 01:11:24,298
- Who the fuck is this?
- Hey, calm the fuck down, pal.
1102
01:11:24,299 --> 01:11:25,487
I don't want to calm the fuck down.
Fuck you, fucker!
1103
01:11:25,500 --> 01:11:26,698
You calm the fuck down!
1104
01:11:26,699 --> 01:11:29,698
- You fucking relax!
- No, you go fuck yourself
1105
01:11:29,699 --> 01:11:31,700
and get the fuck over here,
you fucker!
1106
01:11:31,701 --> 01:11:35,299
- No, you fuck yourself, you fuck!
- Fuck you.
1107
01:11:35,300 --> 01:11:37,199
Fuck! FUUUUUUUCK!
1108
01:11:37,200 --> 01:11:40,299
Max! Max, really?
1109
01:11:40,300 --> 01:11:43,099
Those things
practically have feelings.
1110
01:11:43,100 --> 01:11:44,600
Not anymore.
1111
01:11:47,600 --> 01:11:49,300
Ha!
1112
01:11:54,200 --> 01:11:55,700
That's stupid.
1113
01:11:57,600 --> 01:11:59,500
Mmm... no.
1114
01:12:12,100 --> 01:12:14,200
Just do it!
1115
01:12:29,700 --> 01:12:31,400
Mmm.
1116
01:12:45,700 --> 01:12:47,800
Hey.
1117
01:13:03,100 --> 01:13:05,337
What the hell are you guys
doing with all those guns?
1118
01:13:05,350 --> 01:13:07,598
Hey there, pumpkin.
1119
01:13:07,599 --> 01:13:12,098
Nice of you to call us about your
little friend... 12 hours too late.
1120
01:13:12,099 --> 01:13:13,887
You promised me you
weren't gonna hurt him.
1121
01:13:13,900 --> 01:13:15,698
No, no, no.
1122
01:13:15,699 --> 01:13:18,598
No, no, we won't hurt him, OK?
We promise.
1123
01:13:18,599 --> 01:13:20,498
Right, Max? We won't hurt him.
1124
01:13:20,499 --> 01:13:23,098
You stay here with sugar tits.
I got this one.
1125
01:13:23,099 --> 01:13:25,498
No, wait, Max. Max, this one
is different. OK, we cannot
1126
01:13:25,499 --> 01:13:27,788
waste this opportunity.
It'd be like throwing
1127
01:13:27,801 --> 01:13:30,100
away the cure for cancer.
OK, Max, listen!
1128
01:13:30,101 --> 01:13:35,399
No, you listen! Zombies are
killin'.
1129
01:13:35,400 --> 01:13:39,699
Max, we need this guy, OK?
1130
01:13:39,700 --> 01:13:42,099
No, no!
1131
01:13:42,100 --> 01:13:44,700
- Christ.
- No, no, no, no!
1132
01:13:50,600 --> 01:13:52,700
I don't need anybody.
1133
01:14:07,300 --> 01:14:09,100
Mmm...
1134
01:14:13,700 --> 01:14:16,599
This orb was centuries... old.
1135
01:14:16,600 --> 01:14:18,598
Lady, fuck your orb, all right?
1136
01:14:18,599 --> 01:14:20,900
Make sure that maniac
doesn't hurt my friend!
1137
01:14:20,901 --> 01:14:24,499
Where is he?
1138
01:14:24,500 --> 01:14:26,788
No, you don't understand!
1139
01:14:26,801 --> 01:14:29,100
Don't you touch my brother!
Where is he?!
1140
01:14:31,500 --> 01:14:33,300
Sorry, pal.
1141
01:14:39,900 --> 01:14:41,899
Open the door!
1142
01:14:41,900 --> 01:14:44,300
Open the door! Open the door!
No!
1143
01:14:44,301 --> 01:14:48,499
- Open the door! Open the door!
- No!
1144
01:14:48,500 --> 01:14:51,200
Open the door!
Open the door! Girls!
1145
01:14:53,400 --> 01:14:56,199
Girls! Open the door!
1146
01:14:56,200 --> 01:14:58,600
Ah!
1147
01:15:10,800 --> 01:15:13,599
- Is that...
- Yes! It is.
1148
01:15:13,600 --> 01:15:15,900
You promised me
you weren't gonna hurt him!
1149
01:15:15,901 --> 01:15:19,599
- Wait! You called them?!
- Uh-oh. Awkward.
1150
01:15:19,600 --> 01:15:21,599
Hey!
1151
01:15:21,600 --> 01:15:24,498
What the hell is that?
Oh, just hundreds of years
1152
01:15:24,499 --> 01:15:26,498
of mystical antiquity
that you selfishly discar...
1153
01:15:26,499 --> 01:15:28,698
Oh, for Christ's sake, Penny,
get over it!
1154
01:15:28,699 --> 01:15:31,800
- I wanna say goodbye to him.
- No, no, no, no, no!
1155
01:15:31,801 --> 01:15:34,999
No, it's... it's pretty messy.
1156
01:15:35,000 --> 01:15:36,998
Thank you so much for coming.
1157
01:15:36,999 --> 01:15:39,498
I don't know what
we would have done without you.
1158
01:15:39,499 --> 01:15:43,500
Well, luckily, Little Miss Braveheart
over here, she had the good sense
1159
01:15:43,501 --> 01:15:46,899
to give us a call
when she did. Way to go,
1160
01:15:46,900 --> 01:15:52,399
pumpkin. Now you can sew
a big, fat "Courage" badge
1161
01:15:52,400 --> 01:15:54,800
on your Girl Scout sash.
Great big badge
1162
01:15:54,801 --> 01:15:58,399
in the shape of a lion,
giving you two thumbs up.
1163
01:15:58,400 --> 01:16:00,398
How about that, huh?
'Cause you are
1164
01:16:00,399 --> 01:16:03,400
such a mature young woman.
You may even get asked
1165
01:16:03,401 --> 01:16:06,599
to the junior prom
where you can get fingered
1166
01:16:06,600 --> 01:16:08,598
in the cafetorium, right next...
You know what? Fuck you,
1167
01:16:08,599 --> 01:16:11,298
asshole! All right?
That was my best friend!
1168
01:16:11,299 --> 01:16:13,398
And we are so sorry for your
loss, and we will personally...
1169
01:16:13,399 --> 01:16:16,400
You know what? Why are you OK
with this? Your brother's dead!
1170
01:16:16,401 --> 01:16:21,299
You're right! It's, it's, it's horrible!
You, you monsters!
1171
01:16:21,300 --> 01:16:23,299
Get the fuck out of here!
1172
01:16:23,300 --> 01:16:25,800
Yes, yes, yeah, yeah!
You know what?
1173
01:16:25,801 --> 01:16:29,600
You guys are animals!
Leave now!
1174
01:16:29,700 --> 01:16:32,600
OK, you're right. Let's blow, Penny.
I'm sorry.
1175
01:16:32,601 --> 01:16:36,299
What the fuck?!
1176
01:16:36,300 --> 01:16:38,799
Hi.
1177
01:16:38,800 --> 01:16:42,799
- Ugh!
- Holy fuck, Steve!
1178
01:16:42,800 --> 01:16:44,898
You're OK! Did you see me?
I was fucking crying
1179
01:16:44,899 --> 01:16:47,500
and everything! Did you see?
Nice try, zombie.
1180
01:16:47,501 --> 01:16:50,699
Now, get read��
to say your prayers...
1181
01:16:50,700 --> 01:16:52,699
in hell!
1182
01:16:52,700 --> 01:16:55,999
- No!
- Get out of the way.
1183
01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:59,998
No! You are not gonna shoot him, because
we are getting married in six days!
1184
01:16:59,999 --> 01:17:02,798
- Don't make me shoot through ya.
- No! Don't you see?
1185
01:17:02,799 --> 01:17:04,837
He's not a complete zombie!
He's still human!
1186
01:17:04,850 --> 01:17:06,898
Max, you idiot!
1187
01:17:06,899 --> 01:17:09,500
Don't you see this is it?
He's resisting the infection.
1188
01:17:09,501 --> 01:17:12,599
This is our chance
to find the cure!
1189
01:17:12,600 --> 01:17:15,498
Oh, yeah, sure,
you'd like that, wouldn't ya?
1190
01:17:15,499 --> 01:17:17,498
A nice little guinea pig
that you can study
1191
01:17:17,499 --> 01:17:19,800
and make everything all better.
Then everybody gets
1192
01:17:19,801 --> 01:17:23,899
booster shots and lollipops
and there are no more zombies.
1193
01:17:23,900 --> 01:17:27,398
Let me tell you something, sister.
The only shot that cures a zombie
1194
01:17:27,399 --> 01:17:30,500
comes out of the end
of this sweet little baby
1195
01:17:30,501 --> 01:17:31,900
right here.
1196
01:17:34,500 --> 01:17:37,799
Suck it up, brain junkie,
1197
01:17:37,800 --> 01:17:41,400
'cause you ain't getting a
lolli after this one. No!
1198
01:17:41,401 --> 01:17:43,400
Get off me, you bitch.
1199
01:17:45,600 --> 01:17:47,799
- Happy honeymoon.
- Ah!
1200
01:17:47,800 --> 01:17:50,699
Shit!
1201
01:17:50,700 --> 01:17:53,100
Whoa! Hey!
1202
01:17:55,600 --> 01:18:00,899
- Do it, Steve!
- Yeah, eat that fucker's head! - Oh, God,
1203
01:18:00,900 --> 01:18:02,600
messy fucker.
1204
01:18:06,400 --> 01:18:08,500
I can't do this.
1205
01:18:11,400 --> 01:18:13,699
Ah... it's time
to face the fact
1206
01:18:13,700 --> 01:18:16,999
that I'm, uh, whatever this is.
1207
01:18:17,000 --> 01:18:19,600
And whatever this is
is not safe to be around.
1208
01:18:19,601 --> 01:18:24,799
Oh, Steve, dude, seriously, I am so
sorry I called you a gay-ass zombie
1209
01:18:24,800 --> 01:18:27,498
all right? We can put you on
an island somewhere, all right?
1210
01:18:27,499 --> 01:18:31,500
Somewhere far away. We'll come visit,
like at Christmas and shit, right?
1211
01:18:31,501 --> 01:18:35,399
Steve, think about this.
1212
01:18:35,400 --> 01:18:37,698
Sarah, I can't be this selfish.
1213
01:18:37,699 --> 01:18:40,100
I can't go on having people
in my life be accessory
1214
01:18:40,101 --> 01:18:42,999
- to murder.
- No, Steve!
1215
01:18:43,000 --> 01:18:47,000
No!
You'll take care of her, yeah?
1216
01:18:49,800 --> 01:18:54,599
Steve, please, give me the gun.
1217
01:18:54,600 --> 01:18:56,699
I am so sorry, Tina.
1218
01:18:56,700 --> 01:18:59,600
I really wish
I could be there for all of it...
1219
01:18:59,601 --> 01:19:03,899
for the chicken dance
with your Nonna,
1220
01:19:03,900 --> 01:19:07,599
eating our wedding cake,
seeing you
1221
01:19:07,600 --> 01:19:09,600
in your dress.
1222
01:19:13,200 --> 01:19:15,199
I love you.
1223
01:19:15,200 --> 01:19:17,700
I love you, Steve.
1224
01:19:25,100 --> 01:19:27,099
All right.
1225
01:19:27,100 --> 01:19:30,100
Where do you wanna do this?
You want to, uh...
1226
01:19:30,101 --> 01:19:33,699
go around the back?
Or what do you wanna do?
1227
01:19:33,700 --> 01:19:35,999
Max, let's talk about this!
1228
01:19:36,000 --> 01:19:39,599
Whoa! Here?! Really?!
Now?! Are you sure?!
1229
01:19:39,600 --> 01:19:41,699
I just want you to know,
1230
01:19:41,700 --> 01:19:44,899
of all the zombies
I've encountered, you're...
1231
01:19:44,900 --> 01:19:46,899
the most human.
1232
01:19:46,900 --> 01:19:49,699
Please.
Not in front of my girl.
1233
01:19:49,700 --> 01:19:53,099
- All right.
- Oh!
1234
01:19:53,100 --> 01:19:57,900
- The only good zombie...
- Is a dead zom...
1235
01:20:01,100 --> 01:20:05,900
Shit... I was
aiming for his leg.
1236
01:20:09,000 --> 01:20:13,000
Holy fuck, lady! You just, like,
totally wasted your boyfriend!
1237
01:20:14,600 --> 01:20:16,999
He was not my boyfriend.
1238
01:20:17,000 --> 01:20:19,500
He was the muscle.
1239
01:20:21,600 --> 01:20:23,900
OK, Steve? Steve.
1240
01:20:24,000 --> 01:20:26,099
Here's how it is.
1241
01:20:26,100 --> 01:20:29,199
Um... I could put you down
1242
01:20:29,200 --> 01:20:31,138
right now, if that's
what you want me to do.
1243
01:20:31,151 --> 01:20:33,100
Or, you can come with me,
1244
01:20:33,101 --> 01:20:37,099
and we can see if we can't
find a cure for this, uh,
1245
01:20:37,100 --> 01:20:41,899
this thing. Now, I-I-I can't
promise any thing, b-b-but
1246
01:20:41,900 --> 01:20:43,898
I will use all of my resources,
I will work day and night,
1247
01:20:43,899 --> 01:20:47,998
I will use my education until we
find a way to beat this infection.
1248
01:20:47,999 --> 01:20:50,100
Oh, and, and
when we're done with this
1249
01:20:50,101 --> 01:20:53,999
and we find a cure...
you'll be a hero.
1250
01:20:54,000 --> 01:20:56,099
Really?
1251
01:20:56,100 --> 01:20:58,100
I'll be a hero.
1252
01:20:58,200 --> 01:21:00,999
But, uh,
but you'll be a celebrity,
1253
01:21:01,000 --> 01:21:03,100
which is...
pretty much as good.
1254
01:21:03,101 --> 01:21:05,799
Dude, we are gonna be famous!
1255
01:21:05,800 --> 01:21:07,999
So, what do you say, Steve?
1256
01:21:08,000 --> 01:21:13,000
- All right, I'll...
- Ahh!
1257
01:21:15,300 --> 01:21:18,599
Baby! Are you all right?
1258
01:21:18,600 --> 01:21:20,899
You fucking moron!
1259
01:21:20,900 --> 01:21:24,199
Ewwww!
1260
01:21:24,200 --> 01:21:25,999
We're safe now.
1261
01:21:26,000 --> 01:21:30,899
Everything is gonna be fine!
You are a fucking moron!
1262
01:21:30,900 --> 01:21:33,998
She was gonna help us.
She was gonna help Steve!
1263
01:21:33,999 --> 01:21:37,600
You ruined everything!
She was gonna hurt him, Craig!
1264
01:21:37,601 --> 01:21:40,599
OK?! She wanted to use him
for experiments!
1265
01:21:40,600 --> 01:21:44,999
No, we were gonna be celebrities!
On the internet!
1266
01:21:45,000 --> 01:21:49,099
Or at least on fucking TV!
Everything was gonna be fine!
1267
01:21:49,100 --> 01:21:51,199
EVERYTHING IS FINE!
1268
01:21:51,200 --> 01:21:54,699
FUCK! Look at Steve!
1269
01:21:54,700 --> 01:21:58,099
Steve! You're all... happy!
1270
01:21:58,100 --> 01:22:00,099
- Hi, Tina.
- Oh!
1271
01:22:00,100 --> 01:22:03,899
Hi, baby.
Everything is gonna be OK.
1272
01:22:03,900 --> 01:22:07,699
We are gonna get married,
we are gonna be happy,
1273
01:22:07,700 --> 01:22:10,099
and we are gonna be fine.
1274
01:22:10,100 --> 01:22:12,698
I think I may have
fucked up a little bit
1275
01:22:12,699 --> 01:22:15,900
at the end there,
but its OK, 'cause we made it!
1276
01:22:15,901 --> 01:22:17,700
Baby.
1277
01:22:17,800 --> 01:22:20,800
- I love you.
- I love brains!
1278
01:22:35,200 --> 01:22:37,300
Hey, hey, hey!
1279
01:22:43,000 --> 01:22:45,100
Hey, hey, hey!
1280
01:22:51,800 --> 01:22:55,099
It was a bad idea
1281
01:22:55,100 --> 01:22:59,799
To give me this kind of time
1282
01:22:59,800 --> 01:23:05,999
When they said "You're gonna be
In solitary confinement"
1283
01:23:06,000 --> 01:23:09,799
While the other inmates
1284
01:23:09,800 --> 01:23:14,899
Are outside lifting barbells
1285
01:23:14,900 --> 01:23:18,499
I'm in an 8x10
1286
01:23:18,500 --> 01:23:21,099
Prison cell
1287
01:23:21,100 --> 01:23:27,299
But in the night of the sun
1288
01:23:27,300 --> 01:23:29,899
Hey, hey, hey!
1289
01:23:29,900 --> 01:23:37,299
The night of the sun
Hey, hey, hey!
1290
01:23:37,300 --> 01:23:44,899
The night of the sun
Hey, hey, hey!
1291
01:23:44,900 --> 01:23:52,299
The night of the sun
1292
01:23:52,300 --> 01:23:54,899
New state officials
1293
01:23:54,900 --> 01:23:59,899
Are outside running around
1294
01:23:59,900 --> 01:24:02,299
And they're telling
the public
1295
01:24:02,300 --> 01:24:07,299
That I need to be put down
1296
01:24:07,300 --> 01:24:14,999
And Washington's saying
Emphatically
1297
01:24:15,000 --> 01:24:18,599
That I wasn't doing things
1298
01:24:18,600 --> 01:24:21,199
Democratically
1299
01:24:21,200 --> 01:24:27,399
But in the night of the sun
1300
01:24:27,400 --> 01:24:29,999
Hey, hey, hey!
1301
01:24:30,000 --> 01:24:37,399
The night of the sun
Hey, hey, hey!
1302
01:24:37,400 --> 01:24:44,999
The night of the sun
Hey, hey, hey!
1303
01:24:45,000 --> 01:24:53,000
The night of the sun
The sun!
1304
01:25:07,400 --> 01:25:11,199
It was a bad idea.
It was a bad idea
1305
01:25:11,200 --> 01:25:13,200
To give me this kind of time
1306
01:25:13,201 --> 01:25:20,300
- To give me this kind of time
- It was a bad idea.
1307
01:25:29,100 --> 01:25:32,500
It's worse than horrible because
a zombie has no will of his own,
1308
01:25:32,501 --> 01:25:35,900
walking around blindly
with dead eyes.
1309
01:25:44,400 --> 01:25:46,998
I'm a zombie girl
in a zombie world
1310
01:25:46,999 --> 01:25:49,300
When I see you, boy,
you make my head twirl
1311
01:25:49,301 --> 01:25:54,099
Fall in, fall in,
fall in, fall in
1312
01:25:54,100 --> 01:25:56,498
I'm a zombie girl
in a zombie world
1313
01:25:56,499 --> 01:25:59,000
When I see you, boy,
you make my head twirl
1314
01:25:59,001 --> 01:26:03,999
Fall in, fall in,
fall in, sit down
1315
01:26:04,000 --> 01:26:06,098
I might be blonde,
but I'm not dumb
1316
01:26:06,099 --> 01:26:08,698
I can make a J sign
with my finger and my thumb
1317
01:26:08,699 --> 01:26:11,098
Oh no I got a paper gun
pointed at your shirt
1318
01:26:11,099 --> 01:26:13,498
It'll totally stain your rug
and it's probably gonna hurt
1319
01:26:13,499 --> 01:26:15,698
You might still be living
and I might be dead
1320
01:26:15,699 --> 01:26:18,098
But you're lookin' way dirtier
than me, K, fair
1321
01:26:18,099 --> 01:26:20,398
It's a rising of the zombies
and my face is rare
1322
01:26:20,399 --> 01:26:23,098
Because that cute little
zombie is risen from the dead
1323
01:26:23,099 --> 01:26:25,298
I might have an axe
stuck in my neck
1324
01:26:25,299 --> 01:26:27,698
But I still got all my homies'
and my playas' respect
1325
01:26:27,699 --> 01:26:30,100
I got the dopest rhymes
goin' through my head
1326
01:26:30,200 --> 01:26:32,498
And my playas was right,
yo, hip hop's dead!
1327
01:26:32,499 --> 01:26:34,998
I'm a zombie girl
in a zombie world
1328
01:26:34,999 --> 01:26:37,300
When I see you, boy,
you make my head twirl
1329
01:26:37,301 --> 01:26:42,099
Fall in, fall in,
fall in, fall in
1330
01:26:42,100 --> 01:26:44,498
I'm a zombie girl
in a zombie world
1331
01:26:44,499 --> 01:26:47,000
When I see you, boy,
you make my head twirl
1332
01:26:47,001 --> 01:26:52,099
Fall in, fall in,
fall in, sit down
1333
01:26:52,100 --> 01:26:54,298
A to the D to the O double G
1334
01:26:54,299 --> 01:26:56,498
He used to be a rapper
but he's now a zombie
1335
01:26:56,499 --> 01:26:58,998
Gimme a couple boxes
of some Lucky Charms
1336
01:26:58,999 --> 01:27:01,298
And maybe some blood,
and both of your arms
1337
01:27:01,299 --> 01:27:03,698
'Cause I'm a zombie
and I need my food
1338
01:27:03,699 --> 01:27:06,200
Excuse me if my hand falls
off, I don't mean to be rude
1339
01:27:06,201 --> 01:27:08,599
I'm a gangsta
and a zombie too
1340
01:27:08,600 --> 01:27:11,198
My head just rolled off,
could you pass me that glue?
1341
01:27:11,199 --> 01:27:13,398
I like playing b-ball,
especially with my head
1342
01:27:13,399 --> 01:27:15,998
The NBA won't let me join,
I think it's 'cause I'm dead
1343
01:27:15,999 --> 01:27:18,398
Knock, knock, who's there?
I got a date with Wolf Man
1344
01:27:18,399 --> 01:27:20,698
We're going to this brand new
club to party...
1345
01:27:20,699 --> 01:27:22,698
Go, zombie,
it's your birthday
1346
01:27:22,699 --> 01:27:25,200
We're gonna party
like it's your birthday
1347
01:27:25,201 --> 01:27:27,599
Go, zombie,
it's your birthday
1348
01:27:27,600 --> 01:27:30,800
We're gonna party
like it's your birthday...102763
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.