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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,120 --> 00:00:08,120 [Queen's "You're My Best Friend" plays] 2 00:00:11,160 --> 00:00:14,840 -♪ Ooh, you make me live ♪ -[dialling] 3 00:00:14,920 --> 00:00:16,520 ♪ Whenever this world ♪ 4 00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:18,520 -♪ Is cruel to me ♪ -[phone line rings] 5 00:00:18,600 --> 00:00:21,520 ♪ I got you To help me forgive ♪ 6 00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:24,280 [operator] Please hang up and try your call again. 7 00:00:24,360 --> 00:00:27,280 ♪ You make me live now honey ♪ 8 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:30,720 ♪ Ooh, you make me live ♪ 9 00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:35,440 Are you the owner of this establishment? 10 00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:37,560 Do I look like I run a bookshop? 11 00:00:37,640 --> 00:00:40,320 ♪ I'll never be lonely ♪ 12 00:00:40,400 --> 00:00:42,320 ♪ You're my only one ♪ 13 00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:47,080 -♪ And I love the things... ♪ -Aziraphale! 14 00:00:47,160 --> 00:00:49,600 Aziraphale, where the Heaven are you, you idiot? 15 00:00:49,680 --> 00:00:51,640 I can't find you! 16 00:00:51,720 --> 00:00:53,480 Aziraphale, for God's-- 17 00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:55,800 For Satan's-- Ah! 18 00:00:55,880 --> 00:00:58,120 For somebody's sake, where are you?! 19 00:00:58,200 --> 00:01:00,160 [explosion] 20 00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:07,920 [groans] 21 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:09,160 You've gone. 22 00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:12,440 Somebody killed my best friend! 23 00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:14,640 Bastards! 24 00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:18,200 All of you! 25 00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:31,840 [Adam] It's a bad world, but we can fix it. 26 00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:36,600 And it doesn't matter that you three aren't my friends anymore. 27 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:39,000 I've got better friends than you'll ever be. 28 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:44,880 My new friends will be together soon. 29 00:01:44,960 --> 00:01:48,040 They're coming here, and then we make everything better. 30 00:01:49,480 --> 00:01:52,080 [theme song plays] 31 00:03:17,640 --> 00:03:19,280 [God] Crowley had lost Aziraphale, 32 00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:22,320 and the world was ending in a few hours. 33 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:24,760 He was in Hell's bad books. 34 00:03:24,840 --> 00:03:27,080 Not that Hell has any other kind. 35 00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:31,000 ♪ Find me somebody ♪ 36 00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:34,120 -♪ To love ♪ -[thunder crashes] 37 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:37,640 ♪ Find me somebody ♪ 38 00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:41,880 ♪ To love ♪ 39 00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:43,760 I shouldn't litter, should I? 40 00:03:43,840 --> 00:03:45,280 I mean, I probably should litter. 41 00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:46,760 I'm a demon, after all. 42 00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:49,040 But nobody's really keeping score anymore. 43 00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:53,400 -♪ Somebody to ♪ -[thunder crashes] 44 00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:55,800 ♪ Somebody to love ♪ 45 00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:59,200 ♪ Somebody to ♪ 46 00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:04,280 ♪ Find me somebody ♪ 47 00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:07,160 ♪ Find me somebody to love ♪ 48 00:04:07,240 --> 00:04:08,720 ♪ Anybody, anywhere ♪ 49 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:11,200 ♪ Anybody find me Somebody to love ♪ 50 00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:14,800 ♪ Whoa-oh ♪ 51 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:17,160 ♪ Find me, find, find... ♪ 52 00:04:17,240 --> 00:04:19,280 [thunder crashes] 53 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:29,080 [doorbell buzzes] 54 00:04:34,680 --> 00:04:36,880 [door opens] 55 00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:38,680 Mr Shadwell? 56 00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:41,160 Oh, what on earth happened? 57 00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:43,200 What would you say if I told you 58 00:04:43,240 --> 00:04:45,600 that this hand had just exorcised a demon 59 00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:47,760 clean off the surface of the earth? 60 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:49,440 [thunder crashes] 61 00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:52,440 I'd say somebody needs to come inside 62 00:04:52,520 --> 00:04:54,480 and have a nice cup of tea. 63 00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:58,080 But young Newt, he's still out there. 64 00:04:58,160 --> 00:05:03,360 In thrall to heathen ways and lubricious occult wiles. 65 00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:05,000 There could be women there. 66 00:05:06,240 --> 00:05:08,760 Oh, well... 67 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:10,240 now you can't be in here, 68 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:13,360 because Mrs Ormorod and such will be arriving any minute. 69 00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:17,000 Why don't you come in here and have a nice lie down. 70 00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:18,360 [thunder crashes] 71 00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:23,080 You're no use to young Newt in this state. 72 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:25,040 Aye. 73 00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:27,360 I'll have a bit of a lie down. 74 00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:29,720 [sighs] 75 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,480 [exhales] 76 00:05:43,080 --> 00:05:46,280 Nobody's ever done what I've done. 77 00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:49,400 Not Hopkins, not Siftings, 78 00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:51,040 not Dalrymple. 79 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:53,960 I'm the ultimate weapon. 80 00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:56,960 I'm the doomsday option. 81 00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:59,760 -[sighs] -[stuffed toy squeaks] 82 00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:10,120 What kind of a place is this? 83 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:11,160 [thunder crashes] 84 00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:13,160 -[whip snapping] -[rumbling] 85 00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:16,000 [gasping and panting] 86 00:06:21,920 --> 00:06:23,400 You! You're late. 87 00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:26,240 Yes. Um... 88 00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:31,120 Actually, I... 89 00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:34,640 I-- I didn't mean to be here... 90 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:36,400 um, yet. 91 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:41,400 Still sorting things out... on Earth. 92 00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:42,680 [Quartermaster] Aziraphale, isn't it? 93 00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:45,560 Principality, Angel of the Eastern Gate. 94 00:06:45,640 --> 00:06:48,000 Your whole platoon is waiting for you. 95 00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:50,320 Aziraphale. 96 00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:52,880 Aziraphale... Why is that name so familiar? 97 00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:55,600 Hang on. 98 00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:56,840 Aziraphale. 99 00:06:56,920 --> 00:06:58,280 You were issued with-- 100 00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:00,920 A flaming sword, I know. It's not my fault. 101 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:03,360 She was having a very bad day. 102 00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:07,040 You were issued with a body. Where is it? 103 00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:14,920 I'm afraid I hadn't actually prepared 104 00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:17,480 to step into the transportation portal, you see. 105 00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:20,840 And the body... discorporated. 106 00:07:20,920 --> 00:07:22,600 Discorporated? 107 00:07:22,680 --> 00:07:25,880 It was 6,000 years old. 108 00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:27,640 I count them all out, 109 00:07:27,720 --> 00:07:30,040 and I count them all in again. 110 00:07:30,120 --> 00:07:31,720 And then you turn up, 111 00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:33,160 late for Armageddon, 112 00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:34,640 no flaming sword, 113 00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:38,760 not even a body, you pathetic excuse for an angel! 114 00:07:39,840 --> 00:07:42,120 Well, I suppose I am, really. 115 00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:44,560 I mean... 116 00:07:44,640 --> 00:07:48,640 I have no intention of fighting in any war. 117 00:07:48,720 --> 00:07:51,360 Don't be a coward! 118 00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:53,720 You get into position right now, 119 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:55,000 and I won't say anything more 120 00:07:55,080 --> 00:07:56,880 about the body you discorporated. 121 00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:59,640 We can take the sword out of your celestial wages. 122 00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:02,440 I was in the middle of something important. 123 00:08:02,520 --> 00:08:04,280 I demand to be returned. 124 00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:06,280 Without a body? 125 00:08:06,360 --> 00:08:08,200 That's ridiculous. 126 00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:12,080 -It is? -Obviously. 127 00:08:12,160 --> 00:08:13,800 What are you going to do? You can't possess them. 128 00:08:13,880 --> 00:08:15,960 Demons can. 129 00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:18,600 You're not a demon. You're an angel. 130 00:08:21,320 --> 00:08:22,440 What are you--? 131 00:08:22,520 --> 00:08:24,480 Where are you going? 132 00:08:27,520 --> 00:08:31,320 How does one navigate? 133 00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:34,560 -Oh, well. -[Quartermaster] Get away from that thing! 134 00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:36,960 I'll figure it out... 135 00:08:37,520 --> 00:08:39,160 as I go. 136 00:08:41,440 --> 00:08:43,160 [Aziraphale whoops] 137 00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:47,000 What are you lot looking at?! 138 00:08:47,080 --> 00:08:50,200 Don't you know there's a war on?! 139 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:51,640 My friends are on their way, 140 00:08:51,760 --> 00:08:53,440 and then there'll be a world just for us. 141 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:56,360 We'll get rid of everything stupid and start all over again. 142 00:08:56,440 --> 00:08:58,000 Won't that be awesome? 143 00:08:58,640 --> 00:09:00,480 Say something. 144 00:09:00,520 --> 00:09:02,080 You have to say something. 145 00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:05,440 I'm telling you to say something! 146 00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:07,480 Stop it. Stop crying. This is fun. 147 00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:11,720 We're having fun. This is the best day of all. 148 00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:14,520 You have to smile! I can make it happen! 149 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,880 Smile! Smile! 150 00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:23,640 [whimpers] 151 00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:28,840 That was... 152 00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:31,880 I mean... 153 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:34,080 that was... 154 00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:36,120 You know I've never actually... 155 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:38,600 That was my first time. 156 00:09:40,040 --> 00:09:41,640 I'd never have known. 157 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:45,880 Well, seeing as the world's ending, 158 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:47,440 can we do it again? 159 00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:49,600 We don't have time. 160 00:09:49,640 --> 00:09:52,000 And Agnes only said we did it once. 161 00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:54,000 She never. 162 00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:56,600 She bloody-- She can't have predicted that. 163 00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:04,880 "You go, boy. May fortune be with you. 164 00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:08,000 Anathema, my descendant, 165 00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:10,240 I trust he will be fine of feature 166 00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:11,640 and mighty of..." 167 00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:13,840 -Oh, my dear Lord. -Get dressed. 168 00:10:17,280 --> 00:10:19,600 So, we find this Adam, and then we... 169 00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:22,720 -stop him? -Mmm... 170 00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:24,600 I'm not sure anymore. 171 00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:29,520 Agnes doesn't tell us to. 172 00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:32,880 Because if there's a card with instructions, I don't know which one it is. 173 00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:35,160 What do you mean, "Agnes doesn't tell us to"? 174 00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:37,960 Don't you ever just do things for yourself? 175 00:10:38,040 --> 00:10:39,760 See how they turn out? 176 00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:42,480 No, not important things. 177 00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:44,000 And we have maybe an hour or so to go 178 00:10:44,080 --> 00:10:45,760 until there's nothing anybody can do. 179 00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:48,200 I'm not going to waste a second of it, so come on. 180 00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:51,520 You can't let a 400-year-old witch tell you what to do. 181 00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:54,640 I've spent my whole life trying to figure out 182 00:10:54,760 --> 00:10:56,640 what Agnes wanted me to do. 183 00:10:56,720 --> 00:10:58,880 And she's never failed me. 184 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,480 Sometimes I fail her. 185 00:11:01,560 --> 00:11:03,680 -Same again. -[thunder crashes] 186 00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:14,760 I never asked to be a demon. 187 00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:17,880 I was just minding my own business one day 188 00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:20,320 and then... oh, lookie here, 189 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:22,600 it's Lucifer and the guys. 190 00:11:22,680 --> 00:11:26,160 Oh, hey, the food hadn't been that good lately. 191 00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:28,280 I didn't have anything on for the rest of that afternoon. 192 00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:32,400 Next thing, I'm doing a million-light-year 193 00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:36,320 freestyle dive into a pool of boiling sulphur. 194 00:11:36,400 --> 00:11:38,280 [thunder crashes] 195 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:43,040 Aziraphale? 196 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:44,640 -Are you here? -Good question. 197 00:11:44,720 --> 00:11:48,680 Not certain. Never done this before. 198 00:11:48,760 --> 00:11:51,080 -Can you hear me? -Of course I can hear you. 199 00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:54,200 Afraid I've rather made a mess of things. 200 00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:55,800 Did you go to Alpha Centauri? 201 00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:57,920 Nah, I changed my mind. 202 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,560 Stuff happened. 203 00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:02,240 I lost my best friend. 204 00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:07,040 I'm so sorry to hear it. 205 00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:08,600 Listen, back in my bookshop 206 00:12:08,680 --> 00:12:10,760 there's a book I need you to get. 207 00:12:10,840 --> 00:12:14,600 Oh, look, your bookshop isn't there anymore. 208 00:12:14,680 --> 00:12:18,560 -Oh? -I'm really sorry. It burned down. 209 00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:21,000 [thunder rumbles] 210 00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:23,160 All of it? 211 00:12:23,240 --> 00:12:24,360 [stammers] 212 00:12:24,440 --> 00:12:27,760 Yeah. What-- what was the book? 213 00:12:27,840 --> 00:12:31,000 The one the young lady with the bicycle left behind. 214 00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:33,880 -The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of-- -Agnes Nutter! 215 00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:35,720 -Yes, I took it! -You have it? 216 00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:38,800 -Look, souvenir! -Look inside. I made notes. 217 00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:42,000 It's all in there. The boy's name, address. 218 00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:44,400 Everything else. I worked it all out. 219 00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:46,120 Look, wherever you are, I'll come to you. Where are you? 220 00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,480 I-I-I'm not really anywhere yet. 221 00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:50,440 -I've been discorporated. -Oh. 222 00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:53,160 You need to get to Tadfield Air Base. 223 00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:54,960 [Crowley] Why? 224 00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:57,920 World ending. That's where it's all going to happen. 225 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:00,720 Quite soon now. I'll head there too. 226 00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:02,880 I just need to find a receptive body. 227 00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:05,520 -Harder than you'd think. -I'm not going to go there. 228 00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:07,680 I do need a body. 229 00:13:07,760 --> 00:13:09,120 Pity I can't inhabit yours. 230 00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:10,800 -Ooh. -Angel, demon... 231 00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:12,280 -probably explode. -Blehh... 232 00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:13,920 So I'll meet you at Tadfield. 233 00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:15,600 But we're both gonna have to get a bit of a wiggle-on. 234 00:13:15,680 --> 00:13:18,520 -What? -Tadfield Air Base. 235 00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:20,400 I heard that. It was the "wiggle-on". 236 00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:22,520 [thunder rumbling] 237 00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:26,600 [doorbell buzzing] 238 00:13:26,680 --> 00:13:29,440 Enter all seekers after wisdom. 239 00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:33,200 Only if you are prepared to part the veil 240 00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:36,840 and receive wisdom from those who have gone before. 241 00:13:36,920 --> 00:13:40,720 We are here to receive your wisdom, Madame Tracy. 242 00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:42,640 -[thunder crashes] -Oh! 243 00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:44,800 Very good weather for a séance. 244 00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:46,760 Did you have them do it special, the weather, 245 00:13:46,840 --> 00:13:49,760 -with your psychicness? -No, dear. 246 00:13:53,560 --> 00:13:55,800 They're waiting for us. 247 00:13:55,880 --> 00:13:58,000 Our Ron and the spirits, they're waiting. 248 00:13:58,080 --> 00:13:59,560 And we are looking forward 249 00:13:59,640 --> 00:14:03,120 to hearing what they are going to say to us, 250 00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:05,120 after we've made our donations. 251 00:14:08,240 --> 00:14:10,720 [God] Aziraphale had to find a host to inhabit. 252 00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:14,480 And the Four Horsemen needed to come together for their final ride. 253 00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:21,320 Purpose of your visit to the U.K.? 254 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:23,520 I ride to where the end of the world begins. 255 00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:26,000 Sounds like fun. 256 00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:38,520 Four cups of tea, please. One of them black. 257 00:14:38,600 --> 00:14:41,240 And a cheese sandwich. 258 00:14:41,320 --> 00:14:43,320 You take a seat and I'll bring it over for you. 259 00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:44,840 Four of you, are there? 260 00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:46,160 There will be. 261 00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:47,800 I'm waiting for friends. 262 00:14:47,880 --> 00:14:49,240 You're better off waiting in here. 263 00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:51,360 -It's hell out there. -[thunder crashes] 264 00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:54,160 No. Not yet. 265 00:14:56,520 --> 00:15:01,400 [heavy metal music] 266 00:15:04,160 --> 00:15:07,320 [thunder crashes] 267 00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:09,240 War. 268 00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:11,360 It's been a long time. 269 00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:13,120 Famine. 270 00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:16,720 Feels funny, all of us getting together like this. 271 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:17,840 Funny? 272 00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:19,240 Hmm. 273 00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:20,840 We've spent all these thousands of years 274 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:24,120 waiting for the big day, and finally it comes. 275 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:25,560 [Famine] We'll have a thunderstorm to ride in. 276 00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:27,680 Any idea how far we've got to ride? 277 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:31,600 -A hundred miles. -I would have thought it'd be farther, somehow. 278 00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:34,800 It's not the travelling, it's the arriving that matters. 279 00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:36,160 Any sign of him yet? 280 00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:38,560 [wind howling] 281 00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:40,880 [thunder crashing] 282 00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:43,560 -[heavy metal music] -[video game beeping] 283 00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:56,720 When did you get here? 284 00:15:57,920 --> 00:16:00,640 I never went away. 285 00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:04,120 Your tea is getting cold, Lord. 286 00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:05,880 It's been a long time. 287 00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:07,880 But now we ride. 288 00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:10,400 Yes. Now we ride. 289 00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:14,360 [music ends abruptly] 290 00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:17,400 -Ooh. Pfft. -[Mrs Ormorod] She's going under. 291 00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:19,840 Nothing to be alarmed about. 292 00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:22,720 She's just making herself a bridge to the other side. 293 00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:25,360 -Her spirit guide will be along soon. -[sighs] 294 00:16:25,440 --> 00:16:27,440 Are you there, my spirit guide? 295 00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:28,600 [laughs] 296 00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:31,520 [in Irish accent] Ah, begorrah... 297 00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:34,200 'tis me. 298 00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:37,000 Little Colleen O'Leary. 299 00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:41,840 Colleen died in Dublin in 1746 when she was nine years old. 300 00:16:41,920 --> 00:16:43,920 -[sings with Irish accent] -But she was very psychic. 301 00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:45,680 Colleen. Hello, dear. 302 00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:47,240 Is my Ron with you? 303 00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:49,920 -I've got so much to tell him. -[gasps] Ooh! 304 00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:52,200 [Tracy's voice] Ah, Colleen wants to know 305 00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:56,960 if there's anyone named Mr Scroggie here? 306 00:16:57,040 --> 00:16:58,880 Actually, that's my name. 307 00:16:58,960 --> 00:17:01,200 [Madame Tracy] Yes. Well, Colleen wants to know 308 00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:06,040 if you've ever known anyone named... 309 00:17:06,120 --> 00:17:09,000 -John. -No. 310 00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:12,440 -Or it could be Jim. -No. 311 00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:13,880 -Tom? -No. 312 00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:15,800 -Steve? -No. 313 00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:18,800 -Dave? -I knew a Dave from Hemel Hempstead. 314 00:17:18,920 --> 00:17:20,720 Yes! So, you see, that's what he's saying. 315 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:22,240 He's saying Hemel Hempstead. He wants you to know 316 00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:25,800 that he's doing very well beyond the veil. 317 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:29,320 I saw him walking his dog the other day and he looked perfectly healthy. 318 00:17:29,440 --> 00:17:31,880 People go very suddenly. Like my mum. 319 00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:36,080 Your mum can bloody well wait her turn, Julia Petley. 320 00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:38,560 I've been coming here for seven years. I do have seniority. 321 00:17:38,680 --> 00:17:39,800 Now, you tell my Ron-- 322 00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:41,440 [elephant trumpets] 323 00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:42,800 Ooh! 324 00:17:42,880 --> 00:17:44,280 [screams] 325 00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:46,320 -Is it our Ron? -No, it's something real. 326 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:49,040 [chants and yelps] 327 00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:50,400 [panting] 328 00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:52,080 [snarls] 329 00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:55,200 [blathering] 330 00:17:55,280 --> 00:17:58,920 [farts and belches] 331 00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:03,880 [Aziraphale's voice] Sprechen sie Deutsch? 332 00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:08,880 -Is that you, Ron? -Ron? 333 00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:11,000 Not Ron. [chuckles] Definitely not. 334 00:18:11,080 --> 00:18:13,080 Well, I want to speak to Ron Ormorod. 335 00:18:13,200 --> 00:18:15,520 He's rather short, balding on top. 336 00:18:15,560 --> 00:18:17,680 Can you put me through, please? 337 00:18:17,760 --> 00:18:21,320 [mix of Aziraphale and Tracy's voices] Ah, well, there does appear to be a spirit 338 00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:22,720 matching that description 339 00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:24,440 trying to attract our attention. 340 00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:25,920 Very well. 341 00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:28,400 I will hand you over, but you must be very quick. 342 00:18:28,480 --> 00:18:31,280 [Aziraphale's voice] I am attempting to avert the Apocalypse. 343 00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:32,800 -Right. -[thunder crashes] 344 00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:34,560 [sputters, howls] 345 00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:36,400 [sings in man's voice] ♪ Moonlight becomes you-- ♪ 346 00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:38,400 [groans] 347 00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:43,880 [hyperventilating] 348 00:18:43,960 --> 00:18:46,800 [Ron's voice] Hello, Brenda. 349 00:18:46,920 --> 00:18:49,080 Ron? 350 00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:51,200 What... 351 00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:53,400 You sound like... 352 00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:54,720 you. 353 00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:56,800 I am me, Brenda. 354 00:18:56,920 --> 00:19:00,720 It's c-cold here. 355 00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:04,160 Right, so I went to our Krystal's wedding last weekend. 356 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:05,760 That's our Tracy's eldest. 357 00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:07,760 And they start serving Korean food. 358 00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:11,240 Well, I can take a joke as well as the next woman. 359 00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:12,800 -Brenda! -I'm getting to the good bit. 360 00:19:12,920 --> 00:19:16,760 So, I hold up the kimchi and I say, 361 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:18,400 "What you expect me to do with this, then?" 362 00:19:18,480 --> 00:19:20,800 -[rumbling, tea cup rattles] -Whereupon, without even 363 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:22,000 the grace to look ashamed... 364 00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:25,160 -Brenda! -Yes, Ron? 365 00:19:25,240 --> 00:19:28,960 Y-Y-You never g-gave me a chance 366 00:19:29,040 --> 00:19:32,920 to get a word in edgeways when we were married. 367 00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:35,280 And now I'm dead. 368 00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:38,760 Oh! There's only one thing I want to tell you. 369 00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:41,440 You've never spoken to me like this before. 370 00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:45,040 Ron, remember your heart condition. 371 00:19:45,080 --> 00:19:47,080 I don't have a heart anymore! 372 00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:48,400 [laughs] 373 00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:51,680 -And Brenda? -Yes, Ron? 374 00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:53,240 [giggles] 375 00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:56,440 Shut up! 376 00:19:56,520 --> 00:19:58,680 [shrieks] 377 00:19:58,760 --> 00:20:01,280 [loud rumbling] 378 00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:11,640 [high-pitched howling] 379 00:20:11,720 --> 00:20:14,000 [screaming] 380 00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:16,880 [silence] 381 00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:22,080 [Aziraphale's voice] Wasn't that touching? 382 00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:24,080 [clears throat] 383 00:20:24,160 --> 00:20:26,640 Right, well, uh, lovely to meet you all. 384 00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:28,920 [Tracy's voice] Out. 385 00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:31,400 Show's over. 386 00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:34,000 [Aziraphale's voice] World to save. Can't lollygag. 387 00:20:34,080 --> 00:20:35,800 Well, that's very good value. Very entertaining. 388 00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:37,320 [Tracy's voice] Glad you enjoyed it. 389 00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:38,880 [kettle whistling] 390 00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:40,880 [thunder crashes] 391 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:04,480 [Queen's "Another One Bites the Dust" plays] 392 00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:06,960 [God] Crowley is currently stuck in a traffic jam 393 00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:09,560 as he tries to get out of London to find Adam. 394 00:21:09,640 --> 00:21:11,320 [newscaster, on radio] And it's official. 395 00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:14,200 This is the biggest traffic jam in England's history. 396 00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:15,320 Why? 397 00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:16,960 [Satan] What you did to the M25 398 00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:19,480 was a stroke of demonic genius, darling. 399 00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:22,280 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. 400 00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:25,760 [God] The traffic jam is being caused by problems on the M25, 401 00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:27,320 the freeway that circles London. 402 00:21:27,400 --> 00:21:30,480 Crowley had a lot to do with the design of the M25 403 00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:32,320 back in the 1970s. 404 00:21:32,400 --> 00:21:36,560 [Crowley] So, thanks to three computer hacks, 405 00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:38,520 selected bribery, 406 00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:40,800 and me moving some markers across a field one night, 407 00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:43,400 the M25 London orbital motorway, 408 00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:45,760 which was supposed to look like this, 409 00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:49,720 will, when it opens in 1986, 410 00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:52,440 actually look like this, 411 00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:55,080 and represent the dread sigil Odegra 412 00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:57,760 in the language of the dark Priesthood of Ancient Mu. 413 00:21:57,840 --> 00:22:01,640 "Odegra" means, "Hail the great beast, devourer of worlds." 414 00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:03,840 Can I hear a "wahoo"? 415 00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:06,520 [faint booing] 416 00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:08,080 ♪ How do you think We're gonna get along ♪ 417 00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,720 Once it's built, the millions of motorists 418 00:22:10,800 --> 00:22:12,320 who grumble their way around it 419 00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:14,880 are going to be like water on a prayer wheel, 420 00:22:14,960 --> 00:22:19,480 grinding out an endless fog of low-grade evil 421 00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:22,920 that will encircle the whole of London. 422 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:24,280 Yes, Duke Hastur? 423 00:22:24,360 --> 00:22:26,240 What's a computer? 424 00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:28,240 ♪ Another one bites the dust ♪ 425 00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:35,600 [snores] 426 00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:46,840 -[stuffed toy squeaks] -[laboured exhale] 427 00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:54,760 [Madame Tracy] So, what exactly do you propose we do about this? 428 00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:56,440 [Aziraphale] Given the circumstances, 429 00:22:56,520 --> 00:23:00,920 we're both going to have to be extremely flexible. 430 00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:03,000 Get your hands off her, you... 431 00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:06,320 -Where is he? -Who? 432 00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:07,520 Some southern pansy. 433 00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:09,600 I heard him, making lewd suggestions. 434 00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:14,400 [Aziraphale's voice] Not just "a" southern pansy, Sergeant. 435 00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:16,560 "The" southern pansy. 436 00:23:16,640 --> 00:23:17,720 [gasps] 437 00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:19,760 Demon! 438 00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:21,120 You know what this is? 439 00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:23,000 Four fingers, one thumb. 440 00:23:23,080 --> 00:23:26,480 Now, you get out of this good woman's head 441 00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:28,560 before I blast you to kingdom come. 442 00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:31,040 [Tracy's voice] That's the trouble, Mr Shadwell. 443 00:23:31,120 --> 00:23:32,320 Kingdom come. 444 00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:34,120 It's going to. 445 00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:38,240 Mr Aziraphale has just been explaining it. 446 00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:41,080 You come and have a nice cup of tea, 447 00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:42,920 and listen to him. 448 00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:44,320 [thunder crashes] 449 00:23:44,400 --> 00:23:46,760 [God] As Adam came into his power, 450 00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:50,040 the world welcomed him in ways not even Crowley had expected. 451 00:23:50,120 --> 00:23:52,840 [horns honking] 452 00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:54,240 I can't hold it in. 453 00:23:54,320 --> 00:23:56,920 Well, what if the traffic starts moving again? 454 00:23:57,000 --> 00:23:58,800 It's the M25. 455 00:23:58,880 --> 00:24:01,120 You can't just get out and have a widdle in the middle of the road. 456 00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:02,760 I can, and I will. 457 00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:05,720 Hail the Great Beast. 458 00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:08,240 What'd you say, Horace? 459 00:24:08,320 --> 00:24:10,320 Hail the Great Beast, 460 00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:11,720 devourer of worlds. 461 00:24:11,800 --> 00:24:16,960 Hail the Great Beast, devourer of worlds. 462 00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:19,200 [all] Hail the Great Beast, 463 00:24:19,280 --> 00:24:21,640 devourer of worlds. 464 00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:23,960 Hail the Great Beast 465 00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:25,400 devourer of worlds... 466 00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:28,760 [God] The M25 had become, unexpectedly, 467 00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:32,520 a burning magical ring of fire that surrounded London. 468 00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:34,920 Nobody was getting in or out. 469 00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:38,520 Crowley had made it, now Crowley was trapped inside it. 470 00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:41,800 [growls] 471 00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:46,320 Right. The M25 is now an impassable burning ring of infernal fire, 472 00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:48,000 and that's my fault. 473 00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,640 Come on, Tadfield. Tadfield. Tadfield. 474 00:24:55,640 --> 00:24:59,880 Motorists are being advised to avoid the M25 London orbital motorway 475 00:24:59,960 --> 00:25:03,160 because, in the words of a Transportation Department spokesman, 476 00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:05,680 "It's on fire or something." 477 00:25:05,760 --> 00:25:07,760 What does that even mean? 478 00:25:10,160 --> 00:25:12,040 [Aziraphale] I know where the Antichrist is. 479 00:25:12,120 --> 00:25:15,600 I know where the Antichrist is. I know where the Antichrist is. 480 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:17,320 [phone dialling] 481 00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:20,840 -Mr Biggs... -[Mr Biggs] Yes? 482 00:25:20,920 --> 00:25:22,560 I'm calling about a car accident 483 00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:25,280 that was not your fault that you were involved in. 484 00:25:25,360 --> 00:25:27,320 [line disconnects] 485 00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:28,760 Bugger. 486 00:25:28,840 --> 00:25:30,720 [typing] 487 00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:32,880 [phone speed-dialling, line ringing] 488 00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:34,360 -[woman on phone] Hello? -Mrs Blore? 489 00:25:34,440 --> 00:25:35,640 [Mrs Blore] Wha' is it? 490 00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:36,920 I'm calling about a car accident 491 00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:38,400 that you were recently involved in. 492 00:25:38,480 --> 00:25:41,160 You are eligible for compensation. 493 00:25:41,240 --> 00:25:42,880 [line disconnects] 494 00:25:42,960 --> 00:25:45,240 Oh, for Heaven's sake. 495 00:25:50,440 --> 00:25:53,240 [phone speed-dialling, line ringing] 496 00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:57,040 [ringing] 497 00:25:57,120 --> 00:25:58,880 -[answering machine beeps] -[Hastur] Yes? 498 00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:01,440 Hello, Mr Cowwley. 499 00:26:01,520 --> 00:26:03,640 We're calling about an accident you had. 500 00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:07,760 [Hastur] It, eh, wasn't an accident, Lisa. And this isn't Crowley. 501 00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:10,360 Um, h-how do you know my name? 502 00:26:10,440 --> 00:26:12,600 [Hastur] I know lots of things, Lisa. 503 00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:15,200 I should be grateful to you for setting me free, shouldn't I? 504 00:26:15,280 --> 00:26:17,480 I mean, I should thank you personally 505 00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:19,480 and meet your friends. 506 00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:21,040 Uh... 507 00:26:21,120 --> 00:26:22,640 I'm hanging up the phone now. 508 00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:24,040 [Hastur] Too late. 509 00:26:25,800 --> 00:26:27,840 [screams] 510 00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:33,680 [gasps and coughs] 511 00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:42,800 [slurps and belches] 512 00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:44,360 I needed that. 513 00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:46,640 [inhales deeply] 514 00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:48,480 Right. 515 00:26:48,560 --> 00:26:50,000 So there really is an Antichrist? 516 00:26:50,080 --> 00:26:51,400 [Aziraphale's voice] The Antichrist is alive 517 00:26:51,480 --> 00:26:54,080 and on the Earth at this moment, Sergeant. 518 00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:56,640 He is bringing about Armageddon. 519 00:26:56,720 --> 00:26:58,040 I'm sure you can see 520 00:26:58,120 --> 00:26:59,920 that the imminent destruction of the world 521 00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:02,720 is not something that any reasonable person would permit. 522 00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:04,440 -No. -Am I correct? 523 00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:06,000 -Aye. -The Antichrist... 524 00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:08,840 must be killed, Sergeant Shadwell. 525 00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:13,280 And you... are the man to do it. 526 00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:16,760 Well, I don't know about that. 527 00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:20,080 Um, the Witchfinder Army, we just kill witches. 528 00:27:20,160 --> 00:27:22,080 I'm sure you've killed lots of those. 529 00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:24,160 Well, early days. 530 00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:28,520 This Antichrist of yours, how many nipples does he have? 531 00:27:29,600 --> 00:27:32,240 Oh...uh... oodles of them. 532 00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:33,880 Pots of nipples. 533 00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:35,760 Nipples everywhere. Ha-ha-ha! 534 00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:38,200 [laughs] Then I'm your man. 535 00:27:38,280 --> 00:27:41,520 Now, Sergeant, what weapons do you have? 536 00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:43,440 Oh. Here. 537 00:27:43,520 --> 00:27:45,960 Yes, anything more substantial? 538 00:27:46,040 --> 00:27:48,360 Um, I've got pins... 539 00:27:48,440 --> 00:27:51,840 and the Thunder Gun of Witchfinder Colonel Dalrymple. 540 00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:55,200 -It'll fire anything. Silver bullets. -That's werewolves. 541 00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:56,720 -Ehh... Garlic? -Vampires. 542 00:27:56,800 --> 00:27:58,040 Hmm. Bricks? 543 00:27:58,120 --> 00:28:01,240 That should do nicely. Ha! 544 00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:25,560 [chorus vocalizing intensely] 545 00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:37,840 Come on. There must be a way across it. 546 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:40,720 Burning roads. You predict this, Agnes? 547 00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:44,560 Why isn't there an index? 548 00:28:49,440 --> 00:28:50,720 [lenses shatter] 549 00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:54,720 You'll never escape London. 550 00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:56,000 Nothing can. 551 00:28:56,080 --> 00:28:58,520 Hastur. How was your time in voicemail? 552 00:28:58,600 --> 00:29:00,680 Funny, ha-ha. Joke all you like, Crowley. 553 00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:02,280 There's nowhere to run. 554 00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:04,160 Aren't you to be lining up, ready for battle around now? 555 00:29:04,240 --> 00:29:05,520 Hell will not forget. 556 00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:07,160 Hell will not forgive. 557 00:29:07,240 --> 00:29:10,560 You know where the real Antichrist is, don't you? 558 00:29:10,640 --> 00:29:12,560 You'll never reach him. 559 00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:14,360 You're done, Crowley. 560 00:29:14,440 --> 00:29:16,280 Think you're going to get across that? 561 00:29:16,360 --> 00:29:18,440 There's nowhere to go. 562 00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:19,480 [chuckles] 563 00:29:19,560 --> 00:29:21,920 Let's find out. 564 00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:23,960 [thunder rumbles] 565 00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:25,920 What-- what-- why are you driving? 566 00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:28,400 That's-- what-- Stop this thing. 567 00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:31,000 You know the thing I like best about time, 568 00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:33,600 is that every day it takes us further away 569 00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:35,400 from the 14th century. 570 00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:38,800 I really didn't like the 14th century. 571 00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:40,440 -You'd have loved it, then. -Yeah. 572 00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:43,000 They didn't have any cars back in the 14th century. 573 00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:46,480 Lovely, clever human people inventing cars, 574 00:29:46,560 --> 00:29:50,080 and motorways, and windscreen wipers. 575 00:29:50,160 --> 00:29:52,480 -You got to hand it to them. -Yeah. Aah! 576 00:29:52,560 --> 00:29:54,920 Stop it. It's over. 577 00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:58,080 You're doomed! You hear me, Crowley? 578 00:29:58,160 --> 00:30:00,920 You're doomed. Whatever happens. Doomed! 579 00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:03,600 See? This day's already got better. 580 00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:05,880 -[Queen's "I'm In Love With My Car" plays] -[Hastur moans] 581 00:30:05,960 --> 00:30:08,840 ♪ When I'm holding your wheel ♪ 582 00:30:08,920 --> 00:30:11,160 Stop this! You'll discorporate us both! 583 00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:13,400 -[laughs] -[Hastur screams] 584 00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:16,240 -This is not funny! -Come on! 585 00:30:16,320 --> 00:30:19,160 If you've got to go, then go with style! 586 00:30:19,240 --> 00:30:20,640 [thunder crashes] 587 00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:23,640 I hate you! 588 00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:27,880 [Crowley laughs] 589 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:30,040 You are my car. 590 00:30:30,120 --> 00:30:34,560 I've had you from new. You are not going to burn. 591 00:30:34,640 --> 00:30:37,120 Don't even think of it. 592 00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:38,880 [grunts] 593 00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:41,040 [yells] 594 00:30:43,400 --> 00:30:44,840 Ha-ha! 595 00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:47,120 [God] Crowley has something no other demons have, 596 00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:50,040 especially not Hastur: an imagination. 597 00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:53,080 Right now, he's imagining that he is just fine, 598 00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:55,600 and that a ton of burning metal, rubber and leather 599 00:30:55,680 --> 00:30:57,720 is a fully functioning car. 600 00:30:57,800 --> 00:30:59,440 He had started the journey in his Bentley, 601 00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:01,920 and he was damned if he wasn't going to finish it 602 00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:03,120 in the Bentley as well. 603 00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:04,800 [screaming] 604 00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:18,560 The boffins are on their way. 605 00:31:18,640 --> 00:31:20,760 In the meantime, nothing is getting out of London. 606 00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:23,760 -[car horn honking] -You sure about that? 607 00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:26,600 ["I'm In Love With My Car" continues] 608 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:32,400 What was...? 609 00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:34,680 Right now, that's someone else's problem. 610 00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:37,200 He was waving. 611 00:31:39,240 --> 00:31:42,920 ♪ The machine of a dream ♪ 612 00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:46,000 [thunder crashes] 613 00:31:47,600 --> 00:31:49,320 Listen, I'm sorry I made you all shut up, 614 00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:51,320 but I'm going to make it so you can talk again, 615 00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:52,920 and we'll all play a game. 616 00:31:53,000 --> 00:31:54,960 We're all going to meet my new friends. 617 00:31:55,040 --> 00:31:57,440 You'll like them so much. 618 00:32:03,080 --> 00:32:05,000 Come to me! 619 00:32:08,480 --> 00:32:11,280 Come to me! 620 00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:17,080 -[Dog barking] -Come on. We can still be friends. 621 00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:18,440 After all the people have gone, 622 00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:21,320 you can rule the world that's left. 623 00:32:21,400 --> 00:32:24,000 Wensley, you can have America. 624 00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:26,640 And Pepper, you get Asia and Russia. 625 00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:28,640 And Brian, you can have Europe and Africa. 626 00:32:28,720 --> 00:32:31,360 And Dog, you can have Australia. 627 00:32:31,440 --> 00:32:33,160 So we'd rule the world. 628 00:32:33,240 --> 00:32:35,360 But what about you, Adam? 629 00:32:36,920 --> 00:32:38,520 What? 630 00:32:38,600 --> 00:32:41,040 What bit are you going to have? 631 00:32:41,120 --> 00:32:43,840 I'll be here, same as always. 632 00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:45,400 On your own? 633 00:32:45,480 --> 00:32:46,920 I don't want to go anywhere else. 634 00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:48,800 And this is our Hogback Wood too. 635 00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:50,960 We don't want to go to America or Asia. 636 00:32:51,040 --> 00:32:52,560 You will do as I say. 637 00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:54,160 Or what? 638 00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:56,200 You've already taken our mouths and frozen us here. 639 00:32:56,280 --> 00:32:57,320 We can't get away. 640 00:32:57,400 --> 00:32:58,880 Actually, he could kill us. 641 00:32:58,960 --> 00:33:02,120 [Pepper] Yes, you could do that. 642 00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:04,080 You aren't frozen anymore. 643 00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:07,280 You can go anywhere you want. See? I don't care where you go. 644 00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:16,040 -Goodbye, Adam. -[Brian] Goodbye, Adam. 645 00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:18,000 Actually, yes. Goodbye, Adam. 646 00:33:18,080 --> 00:33:19,240 What do you mean "goodbye"? 647 00:33:19,320 --> 00:33:20,640 Stop following us. 648 00:33:20,720 --> 00:33:22,400 I'm not following you. 649 00:33:22,480 --> 00:33:25,240 We aren't your friends anymore. We don't like you. 650 00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:28,680 I don't care. 651 00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:32,080 -[Dog whining and barking] -Dog, come back. 652 00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:34,400 Dog! 653 00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:38,320 [voices whispering] Let them go. You have the world. 654 00:33:38,400 --> 00:33:43,040 You have the power. You have the glory. 655 00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:45,440 Let them go. 656 00:33:53,760 --> 00:33:55,600 Give me back my dog! 657 00:33:57,120 --> 00:33:59,200 He's not your dog. He's his own dog. 658 00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:01,000 I don't think he likes you anymore. 659 00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:03,360 You're really scary, and you aren't our friend. 660 00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:06,880 You aren't anybody's friend. You're going to burn all this away. Why? 661 00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:08,480 Because some adults mucked things up. 662 00:34:08,560 --> 00:34:11,520 That's a reason to fix it, not destroy it. 663 00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:15,760 [whining] 664 00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:23,040 Come back. Please? 665 00:34:25,480 --> 00:34:27,840 [screaming] 666 00:34:32,640 --> 00:34:34,560 [scream echoing] 667 00:34:36,600 --> 00:34:37,880 [barks] 668 00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:50,120 [Deirdre] Come on, little one. Hello, Adam. 669 00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:01,840 [barking] 670 00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:08,280 [whining] 671 00:35:13,800 --> 00:35:15,920 I'm sorry. 672 00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:20,440 I wasn't... 673 00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:22,640 I don't think I was thinking straight. 674 00:35:22,760 --> 00:35:24,640 I am now. 675 00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:35,520 [birds tweeting] 676 00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:37,760 [Pepper] Adam, what have you done? 677 00:35:37,840 --> 00:35:39,640 I don't know. 678 00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:42,680 But whatever I've started, we've got to stop it. 679 00:35:42,800 --> 00:35:43,840 We need our bicycles. 680 00:35:43,920 --> 00:35:46,280 Meet back here in five minutes. 681 00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:47,480 Where are we going? 682 00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:49,120 Adam. 683 00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:51,640 Adam, after we get our bikes, where are we going? 684 00:35:51,680 --> 00:35:54,280 The end of the world. It's not far. 685 00:35:57,200 --> 00:35:58,400 -I've got it. -Oh, yeah? 686 00:35:58,480 --> 00:36:00,880 If Agnes tells you what to do, 687 00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:02,320 and we need to do this right, 688 00:36:02,400 --> 00:36:05,800 then you just need to pick a card, any card. 689 00:36:15,000 --> 00:36:16,920 "When the skies are crimson seen..." 690 00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:18,280 Well, she got that bit right. 691 00:36:19,920 --> 00:36:21,640 "...then ye both must stand between the world of life 692 00:36:21,760 --> 00:36:25,760 and the world of war, where the iron bird lands no more." 693 00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:28,800 See? 694 00:36:28,880 --> 00:36:30,640 It could be talking about us. 695 00:36:30,760 --> 00:36:32,640 "Where the iron bird lands no more." 696 00:36:32,760 --> 00:36:34,920 Iron bird. That could be a plane. 697 00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:36,640 -Mm-hmm. -Where don't they land? 698 00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:38,480 There's an American Air Force base outside of town. 699 00:36:38,560 --> 00:36:41,000 They don't land planes there anymore. 700 00:36:41,080 --> 00:36:42,960 I met some of the guys who work there at the village pub. 701 00:36:43,040 --> 00:36:44,840 But why would we go there? 702 00:36:44,920 --> 00:36:46,360 I mean, all they have left in there 703 00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:47,600 is communication technology. 704 00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:49,640 Computers and stuff. 705 00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:51,160 Nothing explosive at all. 706 00:36:57,480 --> 00:36:58,960 Oh, my God. 707 00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:01,400 [Aziraphale's voice] Dear lady, it seems to me, 708 00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:04,160 we could make better time walking. 709 00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:07,280 [Tracy's voice] It'd be a miracle to get past 10 miles an hour. 710 00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:11,680 [Aziraphale's voice] Miracles. Yes. Right. 711 00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:16,440 Uh, hold on extremely tightly, Sergeant Shadwell, 712 00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:18,000 if you'd be so kind. 713 00:37:20,360 --> 00:37:22,360 -Whoa! -[screams] 714 00:37:22,440 --> 00:37:24,560 [Aziraphale] Don't look down, Sergeant Shadwell! 715 00:37:24,640 --> 00:37:27,320 And off we go then! 716 00:37:27,400 --> 00:37:29,000 [brakes skidding] 717 00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:31,120 [turn signal blinking] 718 00:37:36,520 --> 00:37:38,920 [dog growling] 719 00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:41,360 [dog barks] 720 00:37:49,880 --> 00:37:51,640 I'm afraid we're lost. 721 00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:53,480 The signposts must have blown down. 722 00:37:53,560 --> 00:37:56,160 We're looking for the air base. 723 00:37:56,200 --> 00:37:57,640 Well, it's second on the right. 724 00:37:57,680 --> 00:37:59,040 Well, it's not exactly on the right. 725 00:37:59,120 --> 00:38:00,640 You go to the left, but you'll find 726 00:38:00,680 --> 00:38:03,960 that it winds its way around to the right eventually. 727 00:38:04,040 --> 00:38:06,160 It's signposted "Porrit's Lane". 728 00:38:06,280 --> 00:38:08,840 You'll come into the village, you go up past the Bull and Fiddle 729 00:38:08,920 --> 00:38:10,560 and you can't miss it. 730 00:38:11,400 --> 00:38:12,640 Not sure I got that. 731 00:38:12,680 --> 00:38:14,640 [Death] I did. Let us go. 732 00:38:23,280 --> 00:38:25,640 [Anathema] "Behind the eagle's nest a great ash hath fallen." 733 00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:27,080 That's it. 734 00:38:28,840 --> 00:38:31,120 You know, most of my family thought it was something 735 00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:32,600 to do with the Russian Revolution. 736 00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:34,840 You know, these places have some pretty serious people 737 00:38:34,920 --> 00:38:36,640 with some extremely big guns guarding them. 738 00:38:36,680 --> 00:38:38,160 And if we don't get shot trying to break in, 739 00:38:38,280 --> 00:38:40,200 then we're going to spend the last few minutes 740 00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:42,600 before the world ends in a little cell without any windows in it-- 741 00:38:42,640 --> 00:38:45,160 Okay. I think you're getting yourself a little overexcited. 742 00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:48,600 I'm not. I'm getting myself quite calmly worried 743 00:38:48,640 --> 00:38:51,520 about being shot, and then put in a cell, 744 00:38:51,600 --> 00:38:54,160 and then waterboarded, and then shot again. 745 00:38:54,280 --> 00:38:56,480 Don't worry, Agnes would have definitely told me 746 00:38:56,560 --> 00:38:58,440 if someone was going to shoot you. 747 00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:39,400 This is the place. 748 00:39:41,160 --> 00:39:44,160 Is this all there is? I thought it'd be more impressive somehow. 749 00:39:44,280 --> 00:39:45,920 All these thousands of years waiting, 750 00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:47,760 just for a ride of a hundred miles. 751 00:39:47,840 --> 00:39:51,960 If Armageddon is anywhere, then it is everywhere. 752 00:39:52,040 --> 00:39:53,480 Let's crash through the barriers. 753 00:39:53,560 --> 00:39:57,800 [Death] No. We go in, we do the job, we go out. 754 00:39:57,880 --> 00:40:00,600 The geography is immaterial. 755 00:40:19,560 --> 00:40:21,640 [Death's voice] Surprise inspection, officer. 756 00:40:24,640 --> 00:40:28,600 I was not informated on any surprise inspection, sir. 757 00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:31,360 Well, if you had, it wouldn't be a surprise, now would it? 758 00:40:31,920 --> 00:40:33,440 Can I... 759 00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:36,200 Can I see some kind of identification, sir? 760 00:40:37,360 --> 00:40:38,680 Very good, sir. 761 00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:40,640 Don't tell them we're coming, officer. 762 00:40:40,680 --> 00:40:42,600 We want it to be a surprise. 763 00:40:55,320 --> 00:40:56,920 [turns engine off] 764 00:40:57,000 --> 00:40:59,680 "Behind the eagle's nest, a great ash hath fallen." 765 00:40:59,800 --> 00:41:01,360 Well, she's on the money there. 766 00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:05,200 -[car door slams] -Nice going, Dick Turpin. 767 00:41:05,320 --> 00:41:07,520 You really do call your car "Dick Turpin". 768 00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:09,640 Yes. 769 00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:12,800 I bet you're hoping one day someone's going to ask you why. 770 00:41:12,880 --> 00:41:15,160 Maybe. [clears throat] 771 00:41:15,840 --> 00:41:17,840 Right. 772 00:41:17,920 --> 00:41:19,840 It can't be this easy. It really can't. 773 00:41:19,920 --> 00:41:22,800 There's going to be guards and security cameras. 774 00:41:25,600 --> 00:41:27,160 Where are we going? 775 00:41:28,520 --> 00:41:30,480 There. 776 00:41:30,560 --> 00:41:31,840 How do you know? 777 00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:33,520 Because everything in my life, 778 00:41:33,600 --> 00:41:35,880 everything Agnes wrote down on that book 400 years ago, 779 00:41:35,960 --> 00:41:38,040 everything is all leading me here. 780 00:41:38,120 --> 00:41:40,640 Now. With you. 781 00:41:42,840 --> 00:41:46,120 I know. 782 00:41:46,160 --> 00:41:48,640 -How are we going to stop them exactly? -Come on. 783 00:41:55,800 --> 00:41:58,160 [Pepper] It's stupid calling it a military base. 784 00:41:58,280 --> 00:41:59,640 I went up there on their open day, 785 00:41:59,760 --> 00:42:01,440 and they didn't even have guns and things. 786 00:42:01,520 --> 00:42:04,880 Just lots of radios, satellite dishes and stuff. 787 00:42:04,960 --> 00:42:07,160 Yeah, it was all knobs and dials. 788 00:42:07,200 --> 00:42:08,600 Stupid. 789 00:42:08,640 --> 00:42:10,360 What are your new friends going to do here? 790 00:42:10,440 --> 00:42:12,960 Well, I suppose they could patch into the worldwide military net 791 00:42:13,040 --> 00:42:14,600 and issue orders to all computers 792 00:42:14,640 --> 00:42:16,360 to activate all automated systems and start fighting. 793 00:42:16,440 --> 00:42:19,280 Actually, that would be quite difficult. 794 00:42:19,360 --> 00:42:22,080 Not really. Not if you're them. 795 00:43:10,520 --> 00:43:13,320 Oi, you! Stop! 796 00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:16,040 I said stop! 797 00:43:17,440 --> 00:43:20,960 Adam Young, I thought it was you. 798 00:43:21,040 --> 00:43:23,480 And the rest of you. Do your parents know you're out? 799 00:43:23,560 --> 00:43:25,680 Actually, it's not like there's a law against being out. 800 00:43:25,800 --> 00:43:29,920 I mean, you can't get sent to prison for "being out". 801 00:43:30,000 --> 00:43:32,440 Where are you four troublemakers going this evening? 802 00:43:32,520 --> 00:43:35,160 And don't stick your tongue out at me, young lady, 803 00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:37,360 or I'll have words with your mother. 804 00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:39,520 -We're going to the air base. -If that's alright with you. 805 00:43:39,600 --> 00:43:42,080 I mean, we wouldn't want to go there if it wasn't alright with you. 806 00:43:43,760 --> 00:43:47,920 Adam Young, don't think I won't talk to your father! 807 00:43:50,560 --> 00:43:52,600 Can someone pass me the screwdriver? 808 00:43:56,680 --> 00:43:58,280 Who the hell are you? 809 00:43:58,360 --> 00:44:01,880 I am neither of Hell nor Heaven. 810 00:44:01,960 --> 00:44:04,840 [Pollution] What's so special about this place anyway? 811 00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:07,040 This is a classified communications hub. 812 00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:08,880 Everything comes through here. 813 00:44:08,960 --> 00:44:11,040 See, they've made it so they don't even have to fight anymore. 814 00:44:11,120 --> 00:44:14,600 -Machines will do it for them. -[Death] Except the dying. 815 00:44:14,680 --> 00:44:16,320 When it comes to some things, 816 00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,560 machines will never replace people. 817 00:44:18,640 --> 00:44:20,160 [War] I can feel it. 818 00:44:20,240 --> 00:44:21,520 Another five minutes, 819 00:44:21,600 --> 00:44:23,280 and the whole world will be at war. 820 00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:24,800 [Famine] And once the war begins, 821 00:44:24,880 --> 00:44:26,760 the famine comes... 822 00:44:26,840 --> 00:44:29,440 then the pollution. 823 00:44:29,520 --> 00:44:30,560 [blows] 824 00:44:30,640 --> 00:44:33,320 [electrical buzzing] 825 00:44:33,400 --> 00:44:35,360 We're in business. 826 00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:49,840 [God] They are taking charge of the electricity, all of it. 827 00:44:49,920 --> 00:44:52,720 And under their rule, it is coming to life. 828 00:44:52,800 --> 00:44:55,800 They're fusing relays. They're closing switches. 829 00:44:55,880 --> 00:44:57,560 They're turning off the lights. 830 00:44:57,640 --> 00:44:59,320 They are in control. 831 00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:00,560 [electricity zapping] 832 00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:03,040 Let's get this show off the road. 833 00:45:09,280 --> 00:45:12,320 [alarm sounding] 834 00:45:16,920 --> 00:45:19,360 -[recorded voice] All warheads armed. -What the heck? 835 00:45:19,440 --> 00:45:21,040 Did you really just say "what the heck"? 836 00:45:21,120 --> 00:45:23,520 Get me STRATCOM Cyber Command. Something's happening. 837 00:45:23,600 --> 00:45:26,560 [alarm blaring] 838 00:45:27,440 --> 00:45:28,520 It has begun. 839 00:45:28,600 --> 00:45:30,040 Nuclear codes delivered. 840 00:45:30,120 --> 00:45:32,920 Everything is set in motion for the final countdown. 841 00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:34,280 The sword is raised, 842 00:45:34,360 --> 00:45:36,200 ready to strike. 843 00:45:40,400 --> 00:45:42,520 [chattering] 844 00:45:44,760 --> 00:45:48,280 [speaking Russian] 845 00:45:56,160 --> 00:46:00,920 [chatter in Russian continues] 846 00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:02,640 It's not just nuclear destruction. 847 00:46:02,720 --> 00:46:04,560 It's chemical too. 848 00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:06,960 And my favourite standbys are all chemical. 849 00:46:07,040 --> 00:46:08,520 Say what you like, 850 00:46:08,600 --> 00:46:11,280 plutonium may give you grief for thousands of years, 851 00:46:11,360 --> 00:46:13,360 but arsenic is forever. 852 00:46:13,440 --> 00:46:17,160 The war, the pollution and then the winter. 853 00:46:17,240 --> 00:46:20,320 I like the winter. So cold. 854 00:46:20,400 --> 00:46:22,160 So clean. So hungry. 855 00:46:22,240 --> 00:46:27,840 [Queen's "We Will Rock You" fades in] 856 00:46:27,920 --> 00:46:33,600 ♪ We will, we will rock you ♪ 857 00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:35,920 ♪ Buddy, you're a young man Hard man ♪ 858 00:46:36,000 --> 00:46:37,160 ♪ Shouting in the street ♪ 859 00:46:37,240 --> 00:46:39,200 Ah, excuse me. Sorry to bother you. 860 00:46:39,280 --> 00:46:41,840 I seem to have got slightly lost. 861 00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:43,680 Tadfield Air Base? 862 00:46:43,760 --> 00:46:45,960 [God] There are some things it is very difficult to say. 863 00:46:46,040 --> 00:46:48,760 What R.P. Tyler truly wants to say is: 864 00:46:50,080 --> 00:46:52,880 [Tyler] Your car is on fire. 865 00:46:52,960 --> 00:46:56,600 [God] But he can't. I mean, the man must know, mustn't he? 866 00:46:56,680 --> 00:46:59,360 Perhaps it's some kind of practical joke? 867 00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:00,560 So he says... 868 00:47:00,640 --> 00:47:02,320 [Tyler] Might have taken the wrong turn. 869 00:47:02,400 --> 00:47:04,280 Signpost blown down. 870 00:47:04,360 --> 00:47:05,640 Easy mistake to make. 871 00:47:05,720 --> 00:47:07,480 So, second on the right. 872 00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:09,520 [God] When what he wants to say is... 873 00:47:09,600 --> 00:47:13,560 Young man, your car is on fire, and you're still sitting in it, 874 00:47:13,640 --> 00:47:17,040 and frankly, it's in no fit condition to drive. 875 00:47:17,120 --> 00:47:19,440 Right. Got it. Terrific. 876 00:47:19,520 --> 00:47:21,240 -Young man? -Yes? 877 00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:23,240 Very unusual weather for the time of year. 878 00:47:23,320 --> 00:47:24,960 I'm afraid I hadn't noticed. 879 00:47:25,040 --> 00:47:28,640 That's probably because your stupid car is on fire! 880 00:47:28,720 --> 00:47:31,640 ♪ We will rock you ♪ 881 00:47:31,720 --> 00:47:33,400 ♪ All right ♪ 882 00:47:39,720 --> 00:47:42,360 [song continues with guitar solo] 883 00:47:58,640 --> 00:48:00,200 [song ends] 884 00:48:08,240 --> 00:48:10,120 [grunting] 885 00:48:14,120 --> 00:48:15,840 You see this finger, laddie? 886 00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:18,240 This finger could send you to your maker. 887 00:48:18,320 --> 00:48:20,600 [Aziraphale's voice] It really is vitally important 888 00:48:20,680 --> 00:48:23,120 that we speak to whoever is in charge. 889 00:48:23,200 --> 00:48:25,520 [Tracy's voice] He's telling the truth. I'd know if he wasn't. 890 00:48:25,600 --> 00:48:28,200 [Aziraphale's voice] Will you please stop interrupting? I am trying-- 891 00:48:28,280 --> 00:48:30,240 [Tracy's voice] I just thought I'd put in a good word for-- 892 00:48:30,320 --> 00:48:32,240 [Aziraphale's voice] Yeah, I understand, but you must really-- 893 00:48:32,320 --> 00:48:34,640 Will you please be quiet? Both of you. 894 00:48:34,720 --> 00:48:38,080 I mean, ma'am, I must respectfully ask you to-- 895 00:48:38,160 --> 00:48:39,640 [engine revving] 896 00:48:39,720 --> 00:48:41,800 [Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" plays] 897 00:48:43,800 --> 00:48:45,520 [tyres skid] 898 00:48:45,600 --> 00:48:50,680 ♪ So you think you can stone me And spit in my eye ♪ 899 00:48:50,760 --> 00:48:52,520 [music stops] 900 00:48:52,600 --> 00:48:55,400 You wouldn't get that sort of performance from a modern car. 901 00:48:55,480 --> 00:48:58,800 -[Aziraphale] Crowley? -Hey, Aziraphale! I see you found a ride. 902 00:48:58,880 --> 00:49:01,120 -Nice dress. Suits you. -[Aziraphale] Ahh! 903 00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:04,760 This young man won't let us in. 904 00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:07,320 Leave it to me. 905 00:49:08,240 --> 00:49:09,680 Army human, 906 00:49:09,760 --> 00:49:12,840 my friend and I have come a long way, and-- 907 00:49:14,320 --> 00:49:15,400 Which one of you did that? 908 00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:17,000 [bike bells dinging] 909 00:49:17,080 --> 00:49:19,560 Okay, those kids are in big trouble. 910 00:49:19,640 --> 00:49:22,040 And so are you people. Don't move! 911 00:49:22,120 --> 00:49:26,000 [Klaxon alarm blares] 912 00:49:26,080 --> 00:49:28,400 All the chickens are coming home to roost. 913 00:49:28,480 --> 00:49:29,600 [clucking tongue] 914 00:49:29,680 --> 00:49:31,320 No more chickens. 915 00:49:31,400 --> 00:49:33,480 [recorded voice] Countdown to activation initiated. 916 00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:35,360 [Pollution] Our lord, our master. 917 00:49:35,440 --> 00:49:39,240 Our friend. He's all we've been waiting for. 918 00:49:39,320 --> 00:49:40,960 When he joins us, 919 00:49:41,040 --> 00:49:43,680 we will be complete. 920 00:49:49,800 --> 00:49:52,800 [God] Adam didn't know what was going to happen next, 921 00:49:52,880 --> 00:49:54,640 but he did know what he had to do. 922 00:49:54,720 --> 00:49:56,320 So, what are these people like? 923 00:49:56,400 --> 00:49:57,400 Don't know. 924 00:49:58,800 --> 00:50:00,040 Are they grownups? 925 00:50:01,200 --> 00:50:02,800 [barks] 926 00:50:08,000 --> 00:50:10,840 -What the hell are you kids doing here? -It's alright. 927 00:50:10,920 --> 00:50:13,640 Listen, kid, you're on military property. 928 00:50:13,720 --> 00:50:15,560 I think you all need to go to sleep now. 929 00:50:15,640 --> 00:50:17,240 All you soldiers. 930 00:50:23,760 --> 00:50:25,080 I'm here! [echoes] 931 00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:29,320 [chorus vocalizing intensely] 932 00:50:29,400 --> 00:50:31,000 He is here. 933 00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:32,920 Everything ends now. 934 00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:35,160 Time is over. 935 00:50:35,240 --> 00:50:40,880 [haunting organ music plays] 936 00:50:40,960 --> 00:50:46,440 [theme song plays on pipe organ] 63385

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