All language subtitles for Madeas Witness Protection. (2012)

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:11,673 --> 00:02:14,050 Yeah, Walter. Hi, it's George. 2 00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:16,886 I know it's my third call on a Saturday, 3 00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:20,973 but I'm having a bit of a problem with the Lockwise Helping Hand account. 4 00:02:21,058 --> 00:02:24,268 Now, I know it's your baby, and I know you'll straighten it out, 5 00:02:24,353 --> 00:02:28,648 but, well, I'm thinking of heading into the office today to see if I can sort it out. 6 00:02:28,732 --> 00:02:31,984 So, no problems. We'll see you on Monday. 7 00:02:32,069 --> 00:02:35,947 Don't worry about it. Give my Iove to Rebecca. Bye-bye. 8 00:02:38,116 --> 00:02:40,284 - Barbara, stop it. - No. 9 00:02:40,369 --> 00:02:42,537 - You need this. - No, I will not. 10 00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:43,996 George! 11 00:02:44,081 --> 00:02:45,915 George, yes. Where is George? 12 00:02:46,041 --> 00:02:48,042 - I would Iike to speak to him. - I don't know. 13 00:02:48,126 --> 00:02:50,586 I don't even know who you are, young Iady. 14 00:02:51,713 --> 00:02:53,214 - George. - Thank God. 15 00:02:53,298 --> 00:02:55,716 George, who is this young Iady? 16 00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:58,094 - Here, honey. - That's... 17 00:02:58,220 --> 00:02:59,971 I can't do this. 18 00:03:00,055 --> 00:03:01,597 That's my wife, Mom. 19 00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:04,475 No. She's too young. 20 00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:06,269 How old is she? 21 00:03:06,395 --> 00:03:08,020 We were married nine years ago, remember? 22 00:03:08,105 --> 00:03:09,730 She's nine years old? 23 00:03:09,815 --> 00:03:13,317 Our marriage is nine years old, our marriage. 24 00:03:17,281 --> 00:03:19,740 She's the second one. 25 00:03:20,784 --> 00:03:23,536 No. I adored the other one. 26 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:26,414 I know, Mom, but, you know, she tried to kill me. 27 00:03:26,498 --> 00:03:28,958 No, she didn't. That was just a Iittle hit-and-run. 28 00:03:29,084 --> 00:03:31,752 Yeah, well, I was in traction for two months. 29 00:03:31,837 --> 00:03:33,754 I don't remember that. 30 00:03:35,257 --> 00:03:37,633 - Here you go. - I Iike this one. 31 00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:40,595 - Well, that's the most popular one. - Yeah. 32 00:03:40,971 --> 00:03:42,471 There you go. 33 00:03:46,685 --> 00:03:49,478 - We aren't done with this. - Yes, I know. I know. 34 00:03:49,605 --> 00:03:52,231 And why are you wearing a shirt and tie on a Saturday? 35 00:03:52,316 --> 00:03:54,108 I have to go into the office. 36 00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:56,277 - You're going into the office? - Yes. 37 00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:58,029 - When? - Now. 38 00:03:58,113 --> 00:04:01,115 George, aren't you forgetting something? 39 00:04:02,159 --> 00:04:04,118 No, I'm not. 40 00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:06,454 I Iove you. 41 00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:09,624 Nice try. Your son. 42 00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:13,252 You promised him you would take him to his baseball game today. 43 00:04:13,337 --> 00:04:16,339 I'm not telling him this time. You do it. 44 00:04:16,465 --> 00:04:21,010 Honey, I'll be back in time. The game doesn't start until 2:00. 45 00:04:21,136 --> 00:04:22,136 1 :00. 46 00:04:22,763 --> 00:04:24,430 I'll be back. 47 00:04:24,598 --> 00:04:27,808 Mom, Dad, Grandma isn't eating. 48 00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:32,480 God, I hate old people. 49 00:04:32,481 --> 00:04:34,315 Watch your mouth, young Iady. 50 00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:37,276 Why? It's not Iike she understands anything we're saying. 51 00:04:37,361 --> 00:04:40,029 You know what? I've had just about enough of your attitude. 52 00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:43,199 Hello? You Iistening? 53 00:04:43,492 --> 00:04:47,161 iPod. They were made to ignore the stepmother. 54 00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:48,245 George? 55 00:04:48,330 --> 00:04:51,332 Honey, would you take those things off, please, and Iisten to your mother? 56 00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:54,669 Okay, she is not my mother. 57 00:04:55,212 --> 00:04:57,004 She's the mother of that thing. 58 00:04:57,172 --> 00:04:58,881 - You're the thing. - You're a thing. 59 00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:01,634 - You're a thing, sister. - Don't call me that. 60 00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:05,680 Dad, I'm really excited about the game today. 61 00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:08,140 It's gonna be so cool having you there. 62 00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:12,853 Jeremy's dad is always there, but he yells at me if I miss the ball. 63 00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:14,980 Well, that's not gonna happen today, son. 64 00:05:15,065 --> 00:05:16,691 Now, I've got to run to the office, 65 00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:19,360 but I'll be back in time to take you to your game. 66 00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:20,778 You promise? 67 00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:23,698 Scout's honor. 68 00:05:28,787 --> 00:05:29,787 Don't forget. I:00. 69 00:05:29,871 --> 00:05:30,955 He's not coming. 70 00:05:31,790 --> 00:05:34,208 That was the Star Trek sign. 71 00:05:34,292 --> 00:05:35,876 He's a Trekkie. 72 00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:37,878 And so am I. 73 00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:07,742 - Morning, Jackie. - Hello. 74 00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:10,244 Don't you wish it was this quiet every day? 75 00:06:10,328 --> 00:06:12,538 Be careful what you wish for. 76 00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:28,888 Gotta be mine 77 00:06:33,018 --> 00:06:35,561 Gotta be strong 78 00:06:35,937 --> 00:06:38,731 A Iittle while 79 00:06:38,857 --> 00:06:42,526 And you got nothing to be guilty of 80 00:06:42,611 --> 00:06:44,528 You might not wanna sing that song. 81 00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:55,039 Okay. Shred everything. 82 00:06:55,332 --> 00:06:57,333 My shredder's broken. I need another shredder! 83 00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:58,793 - Here we go! - Who's got one? 84 00:06:58,877 --> 00:07:00,127 Don't Ieave any evidence. Nothing. Okay? 85 00:07:00,212 --> 00:07:01,879 - Put 'em in a box! - Let me through. Let me through. 86 00:07:01,963 --> 00:07:04,799 Shred everything! Here, here. Right here! 87 00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:09,929 AII the boxes! 88 00:07:12,182 --> 00:07:14,433 AII right. Grab those two! What are you doing? 89 00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:17,436 Just get it in here! Anything! 90 00:07:20,232 --> 00:07:21,649 I got one more! 91 00:07:21,733 --> 00:07:23,567 - Is it the Iast quarter? - Yeah. 92 00:07:25,904 --> 00:07:26,987 Dump everything! 93 00:07:29,074 --> 00:07:30,157 George, come in here, buddy. 94 00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:32,952 Come in, come in, come in. 95 00:07:33,078 --> 00:07:34,829 Walter, what's going on? 96 00:07:34,913 --> 00:07:36,831 Hey, Iisten, pull your money out of the bank, 97 00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:39,583 cash in all your stocks and bonds by 10:00 a.m. Monday morning. 98 00:07:40,085 --> 00:07:41,126 Why? 99 00:07:41,545 --> 00:07:44,713 Well, CNN is doing one of those investigative reports 100 00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:46,507 about Lockwise Industries. 101 00:07:48,343 --> 00:07:50,845 That's fantastic. That'll be great for business. 102 00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:54,807 Not really. They're gonna say we've been running a Ponzi scheme for seven years. 103 00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:59,520 Well, they can't say that, Walter. That's Iibelous. 104 00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:03,357 I mean, this firm's been operating successfully for over 100 years. 105 00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:07,152 Yeah, yeah, they're focusing on the charity division, Helping Hands. 106 00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:10,281 Helping Hands has been going strong for over eight years. 107 00:08:10,365 --> 00:08:11,699 I should know. I'm CFO. 108 00:08:12,868 --> 00:08:14,034 Yeah. Yeah, you are. 109 00:08:14,119 --> 00:08:16,412 Could you say that again, the part about the CFO? 110 00:08:17,247 --> 00:08:19,540 I'm CFO. I should know. 111 00:08:19,958 --> 00:08:21,834 Right. Perfect, perfect. Thanks. 112 00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:26,672 Walter, are they reporting that it's our division? 113 00:08:27,048 --> 00:08:28,507 Yeah. Your division. 114 00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:30,509 But I have all the records. 115 00:08:31,094 --> 00:08:32,928 Say that again. 116 00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:35,973 But I have all the records. 117 00:08:36,141 --> 00:08:38,017 Perfect. Now shred them. 118 00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:39,894 - Walter. - Yeah. 119 00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:41,937 What are you saying? 120 00:08:42,314 --> 00:08:43,981 I'm saying that all the monies 121 00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:48,903 that came into Lockwise Industries' Helping Hands charity investment group 122 00:08:48,987 --> 00:08:51,196 are part of a big, old Ponzi scheme. 123 00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:53,324 What? 124 00:08:53,992 --> 00:08:55,284 Yeah. Christ. 125 00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:57,828 It worked for a while. 126 00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:00,789 I almost feel bad for hanging you out to dry Iike this. 127 00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:03,584 You should see your face, dude. 128 00:09:04,085 --> 00:09:07,463 And by the way, this is not gonna be pretty for you. 129 00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,548 I feel awful. 130 00:09:09,633 --> 00:09:10,883 Horrible. 131 00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:12,509 What? But... 132 00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:14,261 For me? 133 00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:16,597 You were a Iowly accountant, remember? 134 00:09:16,681 --> 00:09:20,476 And then I pull you out of bookkeeping and make you the CFO. 135 00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:23,687 I mean, you had no experience whatsoever. None. None at all. 136 00:09:23,772 --> 00:09:27,483 I had worked here five years prior to that, Walter. 137 00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:32,488 - I was working hard. I thought I earned it. - You did work hard. 138 00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:36,408 Nobody earns it around here. I had to bang my way to the top. 139 00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:39,036 And there's a Iot of big women on the Board of Directors here. 140 00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:42,164 And that was hard, and it was hard to stay hard. 141 00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:44,875 So don't talk to me about "hard." 142 00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:50,047 Okay? You were paid a seven-figure salary for exactly this reason. 143 00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:51,924 What reason? 144 00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:56,971 So you could take the fall. Man, you've been paid to be screwed. 145 00:09:57,055 --> 00:09:59,264 Kind ofjealous. Oh, well. 146 00:09:59,516 --> 00:10:03,268 Walter, I knew nothing about this. 147 00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:05,729 Yeah, I know. I know. Sorry. 148 00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:08,524 Would have ruined it if you had, kind of. 149 00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:14,071 Well, that explains why I couldn't get those accounts to balance. 150 00:10:14,155 --> 00:10:15,739 Now you're thinking. 151 00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:19,994 What about the charities? Walter, 82 charities. 152 00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:21,704 They think their monies are safe. 153 00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,914 I'm handing you over to the Feds, 154 00:10:24,082 --> 00:10:27,835 and all you care about is the stupid charities? 155 00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:30,671 By the way, there's only 12 charities. 156 00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,966 There's 82 charities. 157 00:10:34,426 --> 00:10:38,595 No, there's 12. The other 70 companies were set up by the Malone family. 158 00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:41,098 Awkward. 159 00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:44,768 The Mafia Malones? 160 00:10:45,020 --> 00:10:47,271 You've been Iaundering money, dude. 161 00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:50,107 Yeah, this is gonna be really awful for you. 162 00:10:51,568 --> 00:10:53,193 Hey, man, be careful when you start your car. 163 00:10:56,197 --> 00:10:58,532 This is not happening. 164 00:10:59,034 --> 00:11:02,536 A Ponzi scheme? A Ponzi scheme? 165 00:11:03,455 --> 00:11:07,374 Walter, where are the investors' monies? 166 00:11:09,627 --> 00:11:12,254 Walter? Walter! 167 00:11:19,804 --> 00:11:25,726 Okay, calm down. Calm, calm, calm. Calm down. 168 00:11:25,810 --> 00:11:27,686 That's it. That's it. 169 00:11:27,771 --> 00:11:30,564 Just calm down. 170 00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:34,943 I'm not calming. I'm not calming. I'm not calming. 171 00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:52,669 - Hey, boss, just the person I wanna see. - What do you have? 172 00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:55,339 So I've been Iooking into the Malone crime family, right? 173 00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:56,423 And the more I Iook at them, 174 00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,175 I'm finding that they're connected to this company 175 00:11:58,259 --> 00:12:00,677 that does a Iot of charity investment work, called Lockwise. 176 00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:01,762 Yes? 177 00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:03,764 I think they may be Iaundering money through them. 178 00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:06,266 - We've been after these guys for years. - Yeah. 179 00:12:06,351 --> 00:12:08,435 Why don't you see what you can find out, okay? 180 00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:09,853 Okay. 181 00:12:09,938 --> 00:12:11,438 Thanks a Iot. 182 00:13:13,334 --> 00:13:14,668 George? 183 00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:21,258 I've been calling you for hours. 184 00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:25,012 Yeah, I know. I know. 185 00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:26,722 How is he? 186 00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:30,350 - He was upset, but he'll be fine. - That's good. 187 00:13:30,602 --> 00:13:32,269 Is it true? 188 00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:34,271 What? 189 00:13:34,355 --> 00:13:37,191 Come on, George. Don't play games with me. 190 00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:39,943 AII the wives were talking about it at the field today. 191 00:13:41,696 --> 00:13:42,863 Honey, 192 00:13:43,281 --> 00:13:47,326 I swear I had no idea this was going on. 193 00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:48,410 Okay? None. 194 00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:51,496 I walked into the office, and there's Walter, and he's saying, 195 00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:54,374 "Why don't you shred stuff? Shred whatever you have. 196 00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:56,668 "Shred what's in your desk. Just shred everything." 197 00:13:56,753 --> 00:13:58,378 And I'm going, "What's going on?" 198 00:13:58,463 --> 00:14:00,380 And he's saying, "You're gonna take the fall for this, 199 00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:04,509 "because it's a Ponzi scheme. It's a Ponzi scheme, and you're the one. 200 00:14:04,594 --> 00:14:07,012 "You're going down, 'cause you're the CFO." 201 00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:12,059 You know? I mean, they gave Bernie Madoff 200 years, honey. 202 00:14:12,143 --> 00:14:15,229 What do you think they're gonna do to me? What do you think they're gonna do? 203 00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:18,190 And what's gonna happen with the kids? What's gonna happen? 204 00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:20,734 Howie's afraid, you know, "Dad, you missed a game." 205 00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:23,111 I'm gonna miss 38 seasons. 206 00:14:23,238 --> 00:14:25,614 Sweetheart, I'm in trouble. 207 00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:29,910 - Calm down. - Okay. 208 00:14:32,247 --> 00:14:34,248 - We need to get a Iawyer. - A Iawyer. 209 00:14:34,332 --> 00:14:36,625 And then you need to go to your mom's 210 00:14:36,751 --> 00:14:38,460 and go find your mom's Valium. 211 00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:40,504 Get a Valium out of my mom's purse. 212 00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:42,881 - Okay. Can you do that? Like right now. - Okay. 213 00:14:42,966 --> 00:14:44,591 And you need to calm down. 214 00:14:45,260 --> 00:14:46,885 - Honey. - It's gonna be okay. 215 00:14:46,970 --> 00:14:48,470 - It will be. It will be. - Yes. 216 00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:51,765 You know, minimum security. It's not that bad. 217 00:14:52,976 --> 00:14:54,184 Hey, Madea. 218 00:14:54,644 --> 00:14:57,938 Hey, Lorraine, how you doing? Good to see you. 219 00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:05,279 Lord, it's a zoo up in there on the first of the month. 220 00:15:14,289 --> 00:15:16,790 Excuse me, ma'am. You wanna take this? I don't feel Iike taking it back. 221 00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:19,251 Thank you so much. It's crazy up in there. Be careful. 222 00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:21,461 They ain't taking that EBT card. They stopped taking that. 223 00:15:21,546 --> 00:15:23,547 I got to go somewhere else that take that. 224 00:15:24,007 --> 00:15:27,134 Yeah, I got to go burn up my EBT card. 225 00:15:33,975 --> 00:15:40,939 Give me your money. 226 00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:44,526 That's a cute Iittle gun you got, boy. Get out this car. 227 00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:49,906 Lady, I will stab and shoot you. Give me your money. 228 00:15:49,991 --> 00:15:52,159 Son, I'm gonna tell you this one time, okay? 229 00:15:52,243 --> 00:15:54,786 I want you to get out of this car and go on about your business. 230 00:15:54,871 --> 00:15:56,204 Go get you a job. 231 00:15:56,331 --> 00:15:58,999 You ain't supposed to be stealing from nobody working as hard as I... 232 00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:01,251 What the hell you got to come over here and steal from the poor for? 233 00:16:01,336 --> 00:16:04,129 Get out the car. This is your warning, son. Get out the car. Now, go on. 234 00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:05,881 Then give me your money! 235 00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:09,217 I worked for years to get my Social Security. Now, I finally got it. 236 00:16:09,344 --> 00:16:10,427 I ain't on no fixed income. 237 00:16:10,511 --> 00:16:12,220 I'm on a broke income, 'cause I'm broke as hell. 238 00:16:12,347 --> 00:16:13,805 Now, I want you to get the hell out of this car. 239 00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:17,392 This is your chance. Get out of the car, son. Go on, now. Go get you a job. 240 00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:19,895 I'm gonna ask you one more time, old woman. 241 00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:21,355 I'm gonna tell you one more time. 242 00:16:21,439 --> 00:16:26,026 Look here! Get out of this car. Go find you a job. Do you understand me? 243 00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:28,779 They got people all over the world that is working hard, 244 00:16:28,863 --> 00:16:31,281 and y'all young thugs gonna come try to take money from somebody. 245 00:16:31,366 --> 00:16:33,116 That makes me mad. Now, you about to make me mad. 246 00:16:33,201 --> 00:16:35,202 You about to piss me off. Now, get on out the car, son. 247 00:16:35,370 --> 00:16:36,912 - I'm gonna count to three. - Okay. 248 00:16:37,038 --> 00:16:41,792 One, two, three. 249 00:16:43,753 --> 00:16:45,128 Four. 250 00:16:46,422 --> 00:16:47,547 Five. 251 00:16:47,882 --> 00:16:51,343 I thought you was gonna count to three. Son. Son, son, Iet me tell you something. 252 00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:53,303 Get out the car and go on about your business. 253 00:16:53,388 --> 00:16:56,765 Now, this is your Iast chance. This is your Iast chance. Now I got to go. 254 00:16:56,891 --> 00:17:01,395 One more time. One, two... 255 00:17:01,479 --> 00:17:02,729 Three! 256 00:17:08,903 --> 00:17:10,112 Let's go this way. 257 00:17:10,655 --> 00:17:12,823 Put your seat belt on. You need a car seat? 258 00:17:13,408 --> 00:17:14,783 Come get my money! 259 00:17:15,118 --> 00:17:17,619 Trying to take my damn money that I worked this hard for. 260 00:17:19,414 --> 00:17:20,580 Lady! 261 00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:22,290 I don't got insurance, Iady! 262 00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:24,793 Slow down! Slow down! 263 00:17:24,961 --> 00:17:27,504 You're screaming straight up Iike a Iittle biatch! 264 00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:28,755 I want to go home! 265 00:17:32,093 --> 00:17:35,303 You want the money? You come get it. I come get the money. 266 00:17:35,430 --> 00:17:37,305 - I'm a real thug! I'm a real thug! - You crazy! 267 00:17:37,432 --> 00:17:38,849 Oh, my God! 268 00:17:43,438 --> 00:17:44,479 Jake! 269 00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:47,107 I'm sorry. Take it. 270 00:17:50,486 --> 00:17:51,736 Hey, what do you got? 271 00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:54,072 Well, just got off the phone with the SEC, 272 00:17:54,157 --> 00:17:58,368 and it seems that this Lockwise charity is definitely a Ponzi scheme. 273 00:17:58,453 --> 00:18:00,162 COO, one Walter Burns. 274 00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:02,789 CFO, George Needleman. Never heard of him. 275 00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:04,124 Let's arrest them both. 276 00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:06,042 Well, it turns out that Burns is on a private jet, 277 00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:09,337 according to the FAA, to Europe. Took off five hours ago. 278 00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:12,674 So I'm sure he's gonna fight extradition. But our boy, George, now... 279 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,801 Boy George? I Iove Boy George. 280 00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:18,305 Karma karma karma karma karma chameleon 281 00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:22,517 You come and go You come and go 282 00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:23,643 Sir? 283 00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:25,854 Sorry. 284 00:18:26,314 --> 00:18:29,483 George Needleman? Our guys should be knocking at his door at any minute. 285 00:18:29,692 --> 00:18:30,775 Great. 286 00:18:30,860 --> 00:18:33,445 Well, it'd be great if we could get him to testify against the Malones, 287 00:18:33,529 --> 00:18:34,571 but that may be a tall order. 288 00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:36,865 Okay, but no deal for him. 289 00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:40,368 Look, I'm tired of these people sticking it to the poor. 290 00:18:40,495 --> 00:18:41,661 Sir, if we don't offer him a deal, 291 00:18:41,787 --> 00:18:45,040 what incentive does he have to testify against the mob? 292 00:18:45,166 --> 00:18:46,666 It's very simple, Brian. 293 00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:49,836 If he testifies, the Malones will probably kill him. 294 00:18:49,962 --> 00:18:53,465 If he doesn't, he goes to prison for the rest of his Iife. 295 00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,175 It's a win-win. 296 00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:58,345 Sir, I think we should consider... 297 00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:00,013 No, you don't. I want him fried. 298 00:19:00,348 --> 00:19:03,850 Now, get our agents there before the Malone family gets to him. 299 00:19:06,687 --> 00:19:07,812 Yes, sir. 300 00:19:08,689 --> 00:19:11,191 Hi, it's George Needleman calling for Jeffrey. 301 00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:14,361 Yes, I'll hold. 302 00:19:15,863 --> 00:19:18,031 Where are my car keys? 303 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:19,658 You don't drive anymore, Barbara. 304 00:19:19,742 --> 00:19:21,243 I know that. 305 00:19:21,911 --> 00:19:23,828 Dad, I wish you could have been there today. 306 00:19:23,913 --> 00:19:25,956 Honey, your dad was very busy. 307 00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:28,541 You suck. You should probably just give it up. 308 00:19:28,668 --> 00:19:29,751 No, I don't. 309 00:19:29,877 --> 00:19:31,253 Yes, you do. 310 00:19:32,255 --> 00:19:33,421 And I just tweeted that. 311 00:19:33,547 --> 00:19:35,340 - Dad! - Howie, stop. 312 00:19:35,424 --> 00:19:38,593 Your dad's on the phone. Eat your dinner. 313 00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:40,345 Okay, thank you. 314 00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:52,065 What'd he say? 315 00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:57,195 Well, his secretary said that he would recommend an attorney, 316 00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:59,948 but that he didn't wanna represent me. 317 00:20:00,283 --> 00:20:02,867 After all those years of business with him? 318 00:20:02,952 --> 00:20:03,994 Yeah. 319 00:20:04,078 --> 00:20:05,203 What about Jeffrey? 320 00:20:06,747 --> 00:20:09,082 Nobody's returning my calls. 321 00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:12,585 Has anyone seen my car keys? 322 00:20:13,254 --> 00:20:15,255 Mom, you don't drive anymore. 323 00:20:16,924 --> 00:20:18,008 Is it Hanukkah? 324 00:20:18,092 --> 00:20:19,509 No, it's not Hanukkah. 325 00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:25,181 Yes, it is. That's why that nice young man asked me to deliver this package to George. 326 00:20:26,017 --> 00:20:29,602 And it's a Iong drive, and so I need my car keys. 327 00:20:30,396 --> 00:20:32,689 Mom, who gave you this? 328 00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:35,358 In the backyard, 329 00:20:35,443 --> 00:20:39,446 this man with a shiny, black suit and black, shiny hair. 330 00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:51,082 George, there's a note. 331 00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:57,714 "You tock from me." 332 00:20:57,798 --> 00:20:59,299 "Take," honey. That says "take." 333 00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:01,968 No, I think that's "tock," honey. T-O-C-K. 334 00:21:02,053 --> 00:21:03,386 Just read it. 335 00:21:03,471 --> 00:21:05,722 Well, the man obviously needs a spelling Iesson, 336 00:21:05,806 --> 00:21:07,057 not to mention his grammar. 337 00:21:07,141 --> 00:21:08,975 Can we open the present now? 338 00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:11,144 Mom, you know what? Let's not open this. 339 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:12,312 No, this is ridiculous. 340 00:21:12,396 --> 00:21:13,563 Oh, my God! 341 00:21:14,648 --> 00:21:17,233 - It's a dead rat. - I know. 342 00:21:17,318 --> 00:21:19,444 What does this mean? 343 00:21:20,237 --> 00:21:22,447 AII rats die. 344 00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:27,327 Oh, my God. George. 345 00:21:32,458 --> 00:21:37,128 Don't move. Just stay here, okay? 346 00:21:38,339 --> 00:21:39,756 Don't move. 347 00:21:41,175 --> 00:21:42,592 Stay here. 348 00:21:47,181 --> 00:21:48,264 George Needleman? 349 00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:49,724 Yes. 350 00:21:49,809 --> 00:21:52,018 FBI. You're under arrest. 351 00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:53,937 No! 352 00:21:58,692 --> 00:22:00,652 I can't believe this. 353 00:22:01,028 --> 00:22:04,989 You can't make bail. Your accounts are frozen, George. 354 00:22:05,908 --> 00:22:08,326 Well, here's the thing. 355 00:22:09,620 --> 00:22:13,498 I haven't done anything wrong. I just wanna go home. 356 00:22:13,582 --> 00:22:15,208 That's not gonna happen. 357 00:22:15,584 --> 00:22:17,627 The Malone family is trying to kill you, George. 358 00:22:18,129 --> 00:22:21,506 We've been given orders to keep you protected. 359 00:22:22,133 --> 00:22:23,425 What does that mean? 360 00:22:23,509 --> 00:22:25,552 It means you and your family are coming with us. 361 00:22:29,807 --> 00:22:31,266 We have a problem with Needleman. 362 00:22:31,350 --> 00:22:32,517 What happened? 363 00:22:32,601 --> 00:22:33,643 I think Malone's boys know 364 00:22:33,727 --> 00:22:35,687 that we're gonna offer him a chance to testify against them, 365 00:22:35,771 --> 00:22:36,855 so they sent their signature. 366 00:22:36,939 --> 00:22:38,064 Is he all right? 367 00:22:38,149 --> 00:22:39,816 Yeah, we're getting him out of there now. 368 00:22:40,109 --> 00:22:42,318 Good, I'll get on the phone with the US Marshals right away... 369 00:22:42,403 --> 00:22:45,613 No, no. No, no. They can't go into one of our regular safe houses. 370 00:22:46,323 --> 00:22:48,366 The Malones have penetrated our guys before. 371 00:22:48,742 --> 00:22:52,704 You can't make bail. Your accounts are frozen, George. 372 00:22:53,622 --> 00:22:56,040 Well, here's the thing. 373 00:22:57,334 --> 00:23:01,212 I haven't done anything wrong. I just wanna go home. 374 00:23:01,297 --> 00:23:02,922 That's not gonna happen. 375 00:23:03,299 --> 00:23:05,341 The Malone family is trying to kill you, George. 376 00:23:05,843 --> 00:23:09,220 We've been given orders to keep you protected. 377 00:23:09,847 --> 00:23:11,139 What does that mean? 378 00:23:11,223 --> 00:23:13,266 It means you and your family are coming with us. 379 00:23:17,521 --> 00:23:18,980 We have a problem with Needleman. 380 00:23:19,064 --> 00:23:20,231 What happened? 381 00:23:20,316 --> 00:23:21,357 I think Malone's boys know 382 00:23:21,442 --> 00:23:23,401 that we're gonna offer him a chance to testify against them, 383 00:23:23,486 --> 00:23:24,569 so they sent their signature. 384 00:23:24,653 --> 00:23:25,778 Is he all right? 385 00:23:25,863 --> 00:23:27,530 Yeah, we're getting him out of there now. 386 00:23:27,823 --> 00:23:30,033 Good, I'll get on the phone with the US Marshals right away... 387 00:23:30,117 --> 00:23:33,328 No, no. No, no. They can't go into one of our regular safe houses. 388 00:23:34,038 --> 00:23:36,080 The Malones have penetrated our guys before. 389 00:23:36,207 --> 00:23:38,249 - Now, get up. - I'm up. I'm up. 390 00:23:38,375 --> 00:23:41,586 Probably dreaming about Skittles and Coca-Cola and Pepsi, 391 00:23:41,712 --> 00:23:44,047 diet soda and Mountain Dew and Honey Buns, 392 00:23:44,131 --> 00:23:46,007 and damn Krispy Kreme and everything else. 393 00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:47,133 So you're up? 394 00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:50,762 There you are, Sadie. You must iron the sheets. 395 00:23:50,888 --> 00:23:54,307 Mr. Needleman gets very angry if there are any wrinkles. 396 00:23:56,936 --> 00:23:58,770 Honey, who the hell is Sadie? 397 00:23:58,896 --> 00:24:00,897 Don't you use that kind of Ianguage with me. 398 00:24:00,981 --> 00:24:04,400 'Cause I'll have you fired. Do you understand? 399 00:24:04,485 --> 00:24:07,320 Mrs. Needleman. Okay, I get it. 400 00:24:07,446 --> 00:24:11,449 The mall is open, but there ain't nobody in there shopping. 401 00:24:11,533 --> 00:24:14,494 We need to move him to someplace safe now. 402 00:24:14,578 --> 00:24:16,746 Good idea. What do you suggest? 403 00:24:16,830 --> 00:24:18,915 I don't know, but first thing tomorrow morning, 404 00:24:18,999 --> 00:24:20,166 they're on a plane headed here. 405 00:24:20,251 --> 00:24:23,711 You figure it out and tell no one. Not even me. 406 00:24:25,256 --> 00:24:26,798 Sir, I've got kids at my house. 407 00:24:26,882 --> 00:24:28,508 I don't know what I would do with a whole family of... 408 00:24:28,592 --> 00:24:31,010 I don't know. You've been a prosecutor for over a year. 409 00:24:31,095 --> 00:24:34,264 This is a big case for you, Brian. Handle it. 410 00:24:34,723 --> 00:24:37,892 George Needleman? Our guys should be knocking at his door at any minute. 411 00:24:38,102 --> 00:24:39,185 Great. 412 00:24:39,270 --> 00:24:41,854 Well, it'd be great if we could get him to testify against the Malones, 413 00:24:41,939 --> 00:24:42,981 but that may be a tall order. 414 00:24:43,065 --> 00:24:45,275 Okay, but no deal for him. 415 00:24:46,110 --> 00:24:48,778 Look, I'm tired of these people sticking it to the poor. 416 00:24:48,904 --> 00:24:50,071 Sir, if we don't offer him a deal, 417 00:24:50,197 --> 00:24:53,449 what incentive does he have to testify against the mob? 418 00:24:53,575 --> 00:24:56,786 It's very simple, Brian. 419 00:24:56,787 --> 00:24:57,954 Yes, sir. 420 00:25:21,145 --> 00:25:22,395 Jake. 421 00:25:23,564 --> 00:25:24,814 What you doing here? 422 00:25:26,066 --> 00:25:29,027 You know, I'm just helping your auntie out. 423 00:25:29,278 --> 00:25:30,445 What'd you do? 424 00:25:30,529 --> 00:25:32,113 I tried to rob her. 425 00:25:32,197 --> 00:25:34,449 Boy, what is wrong with you? I thought you gave up the gang banging. 426 00:25:34,533 --> 00:25:36,409 - What the hell? - I'm in trouble. 427 00:25:36,493 --> 00:25:40,538 My dad put me in charge of the church's mortgage payoff fundraiser. 428 00:25:40,622 --> 00:25:41,998 I think I may have Iost the money. 429 00:25:42,499 --> 00:25:43,499 How? 430 00:25:43,792 --> 00:25:46,794 I invested in some company, and now they won't return my calls. 431 00:25:47,379 --> 00:25:48,504 Jake, come on, man. 432 00:25:48,589 --> 00:25:50,340 I know, and he's gonna kill me! 433 00:25:50,424 --> 00:25:51,799 He just wanted to pay the church's mortgage off 434 00:25:51,884 --> 00:25:53,468 so that he could retire in peace. 435 00:25:53,552 --> 00:25:56,554 Look what I did. And he's so sick. 436 00:25:56,638 --> 00:26:00,058 I mean, those people at the church told him not to make me trustee of the money. 437 00:26:00,142 --> 00:26:02,894 But you know what my dad did? "What your dad did, Jake?" 438 00:26:02,978 --> 00:26:05,563 My dad went up there and told them I was a changed man! 439 00:26:05,647 --> 00:26:06,731 You know what else he said? 440 00:26:06,815 --> 00:26:08,649 He said, "Everybody deserves a second chance." 441 00:26:08,734 --> 00:26:10,193 - Calm down, man. - You know? He said, "Everybody." 442 00:26:10,277 --> 00:26:11,361 - Jake. Jake. - He did that for me. 443 00:26:11,445 --> 00:26:13,863 - And you know what? - Hey, hey, hey. 444 00:26:13,947 --> 00:26:16,157 Calm down before Madea comes out and slaps the hell out of you. 445 00:26:16,450 --> 00:26:20,912 Look, Brian, I need you to help me get this money back from Lockwise. 446 00:26:20,996 --> 00:26:24,123 Lockwise Industries? New York? 447 00:26:24,208 --> 00:26:25,500 Yeah. 448 00:26:28,045 --> 00:26:30,254 That is a Ponzi scheme, man. 449 00:26:30,339 --> 00:26:32,799 I don't know how I can help you get any money back from there. 450 00:26:32,883 --> 00:26:34,092 We're investigating them. 451 00:26:34,176 --> 00:26:37,428 A Iot of people invest in these companies, and those guys Iive this Iavish Iifestyle. 452 00:26:37,513 --> 00:26:39,555 They spend all the money, so there is no money. 453 00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:41,182 And whatever the government can find, 454 00:26:41,266 --> 00:26:44,394 maybe it's pennies on the dollar that they can get back to the investors. 455 00:26:44,812 --> 00:26:46,646 I don't know how I can help you, man. 456 00:26:46,730 --> 00:26:50,483 Brian, I got to get this money back. 457 00:26:50,567 --> 00:26:51,901 How much money you talking? 458 00:26:53,737 --> 00:26:55,655 $114,000. 459 00:26:56,198 --> 00:27:00,535 You were robbing Madea? Madea doesn't have that kind of money. What were you... 460 00:27:01,537 --> 00:27:04,705 Jake, don't tell me you were gonna rob a bunch of old women. 461 00:27:04,790 --> 00:27:09,710 How many Iittle old Iadies you think you gonna have to rob to get $114,000? 462 00:27:09,795 --> 00:27:13,005 114,000. 463 00:27:13,090 --> 00:27:15,299 Boy, get your ass off my porch and go home! 464 00:27:15,384 --> 00:27:16,801 Yes, ma'am! 465 00:27:18,679 --> 00:27:20,721 Help me get this money back. 466 00:27:22,474 --> 00:27:24,767 Oh, man. Auntie Madea, man. 467 00:27:25,561 --> 00:27:26,561 What am I doing? 468 00:27:26,937 --> 00:27:28,896 Hey, hey, Madea. 469 00:27:29,731 --> 00:27:31,107 Hey, Brian. Hey, Brian. 470 00:27:31,442 --> 00:27:32,525 Hey. 471 00:27:32,609 --> 00:27:33,860 I don't know why the hell you go in the bathroom 472 00:27:33,944 --> 00:27:35,153 and Ieave the toilet seat up, Mabel. 473 00:27:35,237 --> 00:27:36,612 Hey, Daddy. 474 00:27:36,697 --> 00:27:38,072 Do I know you? 475 00:27:39,158 --> 00:27:41,284 I'm past 18 now. You can stop pretending Iike you don't know me, 476 00:27:41,368 --> 00:27:42,452 so you don't have to pay child support. 477 00:27:42,536 --> 00:27:45,538 Hey, son. How you doing? I Iove you so much. So good to see you. 478 00:27:45,622 --> 00:27:47,457 You want something to eat? I'm making a sandwich for Joe. 479 00:27:47,541 --> 00:27:50,793 I wouldn't eat that, son. I wouldn't eat that at all. 480 00:27:50,878 --> 00:27:53,629 I believe she be trying to kill me for my insurance money. 481 00:27:53,714 --> 00:27:55,715 You ain't got no insurance money. 482 00:27:56,175 --> 00:27:58,968 In that case, I'm gonna eat this sandwich she done made. 483 00:27:59,052 --> 00:28:00,636 I'm not trying to kill you for no insurance money. 484 00:28:00,721 --> 00:28:01,721 I'm gonna kill you 'cause I want you dead. 485 00:28:01,847 --> 00:28:03,222 I just want you completely dead. 486 00:28:03,348 --> 00:28:07,393 Just no Iife in you at all. Just not breathing. Just maggot food. 487 00:28:08,729 --> 00:28:10,813 Here, son, try to taste that for me. 488 00:28:10,898 --> 00:28:13,232 Hey, I'm not tasting that. Thank you. 489 00:28:13,650 --> 00:28:15,401 What you doing here, son? What you want? 490 00:28:16,069 --> 00:28:17,904 Well, I wanted to talk to you, Madea. I have... 491 00:28:18,030 --> 00:28:19,489 You want some money or something? I ain't got no money. 492 00:28:19,573 --> 00:28:21,407 You don't need to be coming over here asking me for no money. 493 00:28:21,533 --> 00:28:23,367 Daddy, I didn't ask you for any money. 494 00:28:24,328 --> 00:28:25,745 Good. Then Ioan me some, 495 00:28:25,829 --> 00:28:28,915 'cause I need a Iittle change for my Friday night Iights. 496 00:28:28,999 --> 00:28:30,416 What are you talking about? 497 00:28:30,501 --> 00:28:35,171 I be running them hoes, dawg. I be running them hoes. 498 00:28:35,923 --> 00:28:37,423 Shut up, fool. 499 00:28:38,008 --> 00:28:40,676 I ain't got no money either, Brian. What you want? What you come by here for? 500 00:28:40,761 --> 00:28:42,678 Well, I came by with a proposition. 501 00:28:42,763 --> 00:28:45,014 I just thought, you know, you might wanna make a Iittle extra money. 502 00:28:45,098 --> 00:28:46,599 You know, the Iast time a man told me 503 00:28:46,683 --> 00:28:48,935 he had an opportunity for me to make a Iittle money, 504 00:28:49,061 --> 00:28:52,522 I ended up in Mexico, chained to 20 other women, 505 00:28:52,606 --> 00:28:54,857 walking down the street, just selling myself. 506 00:28:54,942 --> 00:28:56,526 You do need some money, don't you? 507 00:28:56,610 --> 00:28:58,027 Yeah, I could always use a Iittle bit of money. 508 00:28:58,111 --> 00:28:59,445 Hell, things been tight around here. 509 00:28:59,571 --> 00:29:02,031 I was even thinking about going back to my old job. 510 00:29:02,783 --> 00:29:04,450 - Stripping? - No. 511 00:29:04,535 --> 00:29:06,118 - Hooking? - No. 512 00:29:06,203 --> 00:29:07,954 - Robbing? - No. 513 00:29:08,455 --> 00:29:10,748 - Hit man? - No. 514 00:29:12,501 --> 00:29:13,501 Slinging? 515 00:29:14,169 --> 00:29:15,336 No. 516 00:29:16,004 --> 00:29:17,713 I did have some hustle back in my day, though. 517 00:29:17,798 --> 00:29:21,175 I was doing a thing. I was doing a thing back then. 518 00:29:21,301 --> 00:29:22,885 I done got the better now. 519 00:29:22,970 --> 00:29:26,138 Good those days are over here, 'cause you too big to be on a pole, Mabel. 520 00:29:26,265 --> 00:29:29,183 I'm gonna tell you right now about that pole. You know, they done switched them. 521 00:29:29,309 --> 00:29:30,309 When you was back there dancing, 522 00:29:30,435 --> 00:29:32,353 they had them telephone poles you used to swing on. 523 00:29:32,479 --> 00:29:34,689 Now, they got them Iittle brass poles. I seen them. 524 00:29:34,815 --> 00:29:36,274 You'd bend or broke one of them. You'll bend it. 525 00:29:36,358 --> 00:29:38,276 Your big ass'll break that brass. 526 00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:40,903 Big ass and brass don't mix. 527 00:29:40,988 --> 00:29:44,949 Joe, shut up, please. Just die. Stop breathing. Okay? Stop breathing. 528 00:29:45,033 --> 00:29:48,119 I'm talking about going back to work at an old folks' home where I used to work. 529 00:29:48,203 --> 00:29:50,288 No, no, you don't have to do that. I got a great idea. 530 00:29:51,707 --> 00:29:53,541 AII right, here's the situation. 531 00:29:53,667 --> 00:29:56,002 I've got five people that are in a Iittle bit of trouble. 532 00:29:56,128 --> 00:29:57,920 One of them is a witness on a case that I'm working on. 533 00:29:58,005 --> 00:30:00,298 And I was wondering if they could stay here for a while. 534 00:30:00,382 --> 00:30:03,718 Just for a couple of months until the trial is over, maybe? 535 00:30:03,844 --> 00:30:05,678 Here? No. 536 00:30:05,804 --> 00:30:07,555 You better shut that up now. Ain't nobody coming up in here. 537 00:30:07,681 --> 00:30:08,681 Hell to the no. Ain't nobody... 538 00:30:08,807 --> 00:30:11,142 You better hush that up now. Ain't nobody coming up in here. 539 00:30:11,476 --> 00:30:12,602 - Daddy. - What? 540 00:30:12,686 --> 00:30:14,020 No, that's just crazy. 541 00:30:14,146 --> 00:30:19,358 Have some criminal up in this house, Iooking all crazy, and police Iooking... 542 00:30:19,484 --> 00:30:23,904 Hell, that's how Mabel Iive every day, ain't it? That's your Iife. 543 00:30:24,031 --> 00:30:25,031 Shut up, rectum. 544 00:30:25,532 --> 00:30:27,366 Go to hell. 545 00:30:27,659 --> 00:30:29,702 - Now, get up. - I'm up. I'm up. 546 00:30:29,828 --> 00:30:33,039 Probably dreaming about Skittles and Coca-Cola and Pepsi, 547 00:30:33,165 --> 00:30:35,499 diet soda and Mountain Dew and Honey Buns, 548 00:30:35,584 --> 00:30:37,460 and damn Krispy Kreme and everything else. 549 00:30:37,544 --> 00:30:38,586 So you're up? 550 00:30:38,712 --> 00:30:42,214 There you are, Sadie. You must iron the sheets. 551 00:30:42,341 --> 00:30:45,760 Mr. Needleman gets very angry if there are any wrinkles. 552 00:30:48,388 --> 00:30:50,222 Honey, who the hell is Sadie? 553 00:30:50,349 --> 00:30:52,350 Don't you use that kind of Ianguage with me. 554 00:30:52,434 --> 00:30:55,853 'Cause I'll have you fired. Do you understand? 555 00:30:55,937 --> 00:30:58,773 Mrs. Needleman. Okay, I get it. 556 00:30:58,899 --> 00:31:02,902 The mall is open, but there ain't nobody in there shopping. 557 00:31:03,945 --> 00:31:05,112 Is somebody after them? 558 00:31:06,156 --> 00:31:07,323 Yes, ma'am. 559 00:31:07,407 --> 00:31:11,827 But, wait a minute. I would not ask you to do this. 560 00:31:11,912 --> 00:31:14,080 You're my aunt. I know they'll be safe here. 561 00:31:14,164 --> 00:31:17,416 Not one person would know they're here. This is the safest place for them. 562 00:31:17,542 --> 00:31:20,503 That's some bull. He's trying to sell you a Ioad of bull. 563 00:31:21,254 --> 00:31:23,005 - What'd they do? - I can't tell you that. 564 00:31:23,090 --> 00:31:25,383 But I can tell you this. I can tell you this. 565 00:31:25,509 --> 00:31:30,596 You know, you, you pack. You know? Ain't nobody gonna mess with you. 566 00:31:30,722 --> 00:31:31,847 And this is the safest place for them. 567 00:31:31,932 --> 00:31:35,601 You could be Iike their witness protector, Madea. 568 00:31:36,395 --> 00:31:38,687 Look here, don't be trying to butter me up and all that stuff. 569 00:31:38,772 --> 00:31:40,439 I see what you're trying to butter me up. 570 00:31:40,565 --> 00:31:42,108 Yeah, I know I'm packing. 571 00:31:42,234 --> 00:31:45,277 I know I can hold some things down, but, no, I don't want nobody up in here. 572 00:31:45,404 --> 00:31:46,612 I'm sorry. Absolutely not. 573 00:31:46,738 --> 00:31:49,365 I cannot do that. You're gonna have to find somewhere else for them to go. 574 00:31:49,449 --> 00:31:52,368 The answer's a flat-out no, and I am not changing my mind. 575 00:31:52,452 --> 00:31:54,954 My no mean "no," my yes mean "yes." 576 00:31:55,038 --> 00:31:57,206 And my "maybe" mean "get the hell out." I'm sorry. 577 00:31:57,290 --> 00:32:00,626 Absolutely not. Flat-out no. Ain't gonna happen. Get on out of here. No. 578 00:32:00,752 --> 00:32:02,378 Too bad, then. 579 00:32:02,462 --> 00:32:06,132 I'll just tell my boss we'll have to find somewhere else for them to stay. 580 00:32:07,259 --> 00:32:10,428 Guess some other Iucky person will make that $4,000 a month. 581 00:32:10,971 --> 00:32:12,805 You know what? 582 00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:16,058 I believe it would be the greatest Christianity thing I could do 583 00:32:16,143 --> 00:32:17,309 to help somebody in need. 584 00:32:17,394 --> 00:32:20,312 So I'm gonna go ahead and make up these sheets and clean up. 585 00:32:20,397 --> 00:32:23,315 Mabel, you know, I believe I'm gonna go drag that cot out of that garage. 586 00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:25,651 I got a cot back there, and we can put a sheet up in my room. 587 00:32:25,777 --> 00:32:29,155 We could share, make sure we got enough room for everybody up in here. 588 00:32:29,281 --> 00:32:30,489 So is that a yes? 589 00:32:30,615 --> 00:32:32,825 Ain't nothing wrong with that cot. Ain't nothing wrong with it at all. 590 00:32:32,951 --> 00:32:36,078 Got a Iittle mold growing in it, but that's all right. As Iong as you don't breathe... 591 00:33:14,367 --> 00:33:15,951 Where the hell are we? 592 00:33:16,036 --> 00:33:17,620 Honey, we are in the South. 593 00:33:17,704 --> 00:33:18,787 Yes, ma'am. 594 00:33:18,872 --> 00:33:22,541 And it brings back pretty fond memories. 595 00:33:22,626 --> 00:33:23,709 Of what, Grams? 596 00:33:24,377 --> 00:33:27,379 A boat and a man, and... 597 00:33:27,464 --> 00:33:30,049 My, he had such a big... 598 00:33:32,636 --> 00:33:33,886 Boat. 599 00:33:35,555 --> 00:33:37,806 Hi. George? 600 00:33:38,558 --> 00:33:40,893 Yes, I'm George, 601 00:33:41,019 --> 00:33:45,731 and this is my daughter, Cindy, and my wife, Kate, and my son, Howie, 602 00:33:45,857 --> 00:33:47,816 - and my mother, Barbara. - Hi, how are you? 603 00:33:49,236 --> 00:33:51,320 The man in the boat. 604 00:33:58,078 --> 00:33:59,828 Don't have a clue. 605 00:34:02,541 --> 00:34:04,208 Cute man. 606 00:34:07,087 --> 00:34:08,420 Well, I'm Brian Simmons, 607 00:34:08,505 --> 00:34:11,006 and I just want all of you to know you're gonna be in safe hands, okay? 608 00:34:11,091 --> 00:34:12,258 I'm a federal prosecutor, 609 00:34:12,342 --> 00:34:14,343 and we have a very safe place for you and the entire family. 610 00:34:21,810 --> 00:34:23,102 Well, here we go, kids. 611 00:34:23,311 --> 00:34:24,353 This way, ma'am. 612 00:34:24,437 --> 00:34:25,771 Place Iooks haunted. 613 00:34:28,733 --> 00:34:30,067 Is this neighborhood safe? 614 00:34:31,069 --> 00:34:33,320 - It's very safe. - Okay. 615 00:34:33,446 --> 00:34:37,074 There's no safer place for you and your family. Trust me. 616 00:34:40,120 --> 00:34:42,246 This is not a hotel. 617 00:34:44,624 --> 00:34:47,793 Okay, Madea's gonna Iove this one. 618 00:34:53,133 --> 00:34:54,466 Madea? 619 00:34:55,635 --> 00:34:56,969 How's my favorite aunt, Madea? 620 00:34:58,346 --> 00:34:59,597 That Brian? Come on in. 621 00:34:59,973 --> 00:35:02,266 The family's here that I was telling you about. 622 00:35:19,159 --> 00:35:20,451 Hello. 623 00:35:25,540 --> 00:35:28,000 Brian, what the hell's going on? 624 00:35:28,126 --> 00:35:31,545 Madea, this is the family that I was telling you about. 625 00:35:35,050 --> 00:35:38,344 You forgot to mention one Iittle important thing about this family. 626 00:35:39,971 --> 00:35:41,138 What's that? 627 00:35:44,184 --> 00:35:46,018 Don't play with me. 628 00:35:47,187 --> 00:35:49,188 Madea, these are the Needlemans, 629 00:35:49,314 --> 00:35:51,440 and they'll be staying with you for a few months. 630 00:35:51,524 --> 00:35:53,525 What? Months? 631 00:35:54,194 --> 00:35:56,403 Are you joking? What, is he joking? 632 00:35:56,529 --> 00:35:57,655 Cindy. 633 00:35:57,739 --> 00:36:00,032 Dad, I can't stay here. 634 00:36:00,533 --> 00:36:02,117 What, are we sharecroppers now? 635 00:36:02,202 --> 00:36:04,161 Honey, not nice. 636 00:36:04,245 --> 00:36:06,246 Hi, I'm George. 637 00:36:06,373 --> 00:36:08,165 And I'm his mother, Barbara. 638 00:36:08,249 --> 00:36:11,043 And I'm his wife, Kate, and these are our kids, Howie and Cindy. 639 00:36:11,169 --> 00:36:13,796 I'm his child. I'm not her daughter. 640 00:36:13,880 --> 00:36:15,214 Dad, I can't stay here. 641 00:36:15,590 --> 00:36:17,883 You know, I think it's kind of nice here. 642 00:36:18,009 --> 00:36:19,551 - I Iike it. - Yeah, you would, you moron. 643 00:36:19,678 --> 00:36:21,887 - Would you... - This is great. Just great. 644 00:36:23,014 --> 00:36:24,890 - Honey. - Yeah, "vacation" my ass. 645 00:36:25,392 --> 00:36:26,892 Hello, trip from hell. 646 00:36:31,898 --> 00:36:34,858 Okay. Look here, 647 00:36:35,860 --> 00:36:39,321 would y'all go on into the Iiving room and have a seat, please? 648 00:36:39,406 --> 00:36:42,950 I would Iike to talk to my nephew in private just a moment. 649 00:36:43,076 --> 00:36:44,451 Thank you so much for... 650 00:36:44,577 --> 00:36:47,121 It's gonna be so Iovely having all of y'all here. 651 00:36:47,247 --> 00:36:49,998 Yes, just wonderful. Wonderful. 652 00:36:50,083 --> 00:36:51,917 We'll be right in. 653 00:37:00,301 --> 00:37:02,636 - What did you do that for? - What the hell wrong with you? 654 00:37:03,388 --> 00:37:06,265 You done brought these folks up in this house. What is wrong with you? 655 00:37:07,100 --> 00:37:09,685 Madea, Iisten. Okay, I know that they're not African-American. 656 00:37:09,769 --> 00:37:11,562 I don't care nothing about the color of their skin. 657 00:37:11,646 --> 00:37:14,565 I wanna know how in the hell I'm supposed to hide five white folks 658 00:37:14,649 --> 00:37:17,484 in a neighborhood where we ain't even got white cats or white cars. 659 00:37:17,610 --> 00:37:20,028 Ain't nothing white around here. If the police come in this neighborhood, 660 00:37:20,113 --> 00:37:22,322 they don't even come in a white car. They send a black SUV. 661 00:37:22,449 --> 00:37:26,702 I understand, but Iisten, Iisten. I know that you can figure it out. 662 00:37:26,786 --> 00:37:27,786 I know you'll work it out. 663 00:37:27,871 --> 00:37:32,666 Boy, hear me clearly and good when I say this to you. 664 00:37:32,792 --> 00:37:35,461 Son, I don't know how to hide these people. 665 00:37:35,545 --> 00:37:39,798 You can do it. $4,000 a month. $4,000. 666 00:37:40,467 --> 00:37:41,467 You ain't Iistening to me, son. 667 00:37:41,551 --> 00:37:43,594 These people are gonna stick out around here 668 00:37:43,678 --> 00:37:46,346 Iike I would stick out at a Republica Convention. 669 00:37:46,473 --> 00:37:49,808 Do I Iook Iike I'm a Newt Ginger fan? Do I Iook Iike I Iike Newt Gingery? 670 00:37:49,893 --> 00:37:53,687 Madea, okay, okay. But you'll figure it out. I know you'll figure it out. 671 00:37:56,149 --> 00:37:57,983 Are we sitting on plastic? 672 00:37:58,693 --> 00:38:00,319 Mabel, I can't find the phone book. 673 00:38:00,403 --> 00:38:02,529 I'm trying to find somebody. Where are the White Pages? 674 00:38:03,072 --> 00:38:04,740 My. 675 00:38:05,575 --> 00:38:07,493 The man in the boat. 676 00:38:10,163 --> 00:38:11,663 Hello. 677 00:38:16,044 --> 00:38:17,336 Hey. 678 00:38:30,850 --> 00:38:33,185 Mabel, they white folks. 679 00:38:33,728 --> 00:38:35,354 Really? I didn't notice. 680 00:38:36,231 --> 00:38:37,856 Come on. I'll introduce you. 681 00:38:40,026 --> 00:38:44,696 Needleman family, this is my father, Joe. You already met my Aunt Madea. 682 00:38:47,116 --> 00:38:52,371 Dad, this is Howie, Kate, George, Cindy, and Barbara. 683 00:38:53,540 --> 00:38:56,583 It Iooks Iike she's undressing me with her eyes. 684 00:38:59,420 --> 00:39:02,005 Now, I'm sure that the agents told you, but I just want to reiterate. 685 00:39:02,090 --> 00:39:04,716 You can't have any contact with anyone from your past as Iong as you're here. 686 00:39:04,801 --> 00:39:05,843 Do you understand? 687 00:39:05,927 --> 00:39:07,052 Dad? 688 00:39:07,387 --> 00:39:09,096 Honey, I'm sorry. 689 00:39:10,265 --> 00:39:12,099 This is crazy. 690 00:39:13,059 --> 00:39:14,726 You suck. 691 00:39:16,145 --> 00:39:17,855 Did she just say... I know she... 692 00:39:17,939 --> 00:39:19,606 Did that child just say she sucked to her daddy? 693 00:39:19,732 --> 00:39:23,777 Lord, have mercy. What generation is this? You can't... 694 00:39:24,404 --> 00:39:27,155 You better hurry up and get them the hell out of here. 695 00:39:27,740 --> 00:39:29,783 Mabel gonna kill that Iittle girl. 696 00:39:29,868 --> 00:39:33,495 But, Cindy, this is only until the trial is over. Isn't that right, Brian? 697 00:39:33,580 --> 00:39:36,123 Yes, just until the trial is over. 698 00:39:36,207 --> 00:39:38,041 I hate you. 699 00:39:38,668 --> 00:39:41,461 That girl says she hate him. Oh, Lord, somebody gonna have to help me. 700 00:39:41,546 --> 00:39:43,672 God, help me. God, help me. 701 00:39:44,048 --> 00:39:46,550 George, I know it's been a rough day for you, so I tell you what. 702 00:39:46,634 --> 00:39:48,886 I'll come by tomorrow morning about 9:00, pick you up. 703 00:39:48,970 --> 00:39:51,096 We'll go to the office and begin working on this case, okay? 704 00:39:53,224 --> 00:39:56,059 So, Madea, why don't you show your house guests where they'll be staying? 705 00:39:56,144 --> 00:39:59,271 Yeah, go on and show them, Mabel. I ain't trying to go up there with them. 706 00:39:59,355 --> 00:40:03,150 That one right there, I don't Iike the way she's Iooking at me. 707 00:40:03,234 --> 00:40:06,236 Well, you can show me to the door. I'm getting back on that plane. 708 00:40:06,321 --> 00:40:07,654 - Honey. - Excuse us. 709 00:40:07,739 --> 00:40:10,407 - You don't talk Iike that. Watch your mouth. - Are you kidding me? Seriously. 710 00:40:10,491 --> 00:40:11,700 Your ass trying to get me a case. 711 00:40:11,784 --> 00:40:13,619 That's what you trying to do. You're trying to get me a case. 712 00:40:14,329 --> 00:40:17,331 Better get a speedy trial. I'm gonna tell you that right now. 713 00:40:18,291 --> 00:40:20,292 I'll get a speedy trial. 714 00:40:24,756 --> 00:40:26,465 What's happening to us? 715 00:40:27,508 --> 00:40:30,218 Kate, if I'd known 716 00:40:30,303 --> 00:40:33,722 that taking care of my family would Iead us to this, I would've... 717 00:40:33,806 --> 00:40:36,600 This wasn't about family. This was about you. 718 00:40:36,684 --> 00:40:39,061 We have way more than we needed. 719 00:40:40,271 --> 00:40:42,606 This was about greed. 720 00:40:42,690 --> 00:40:44,149 You know, sweetheart, 721 00:40:44,233 --> 00:40:48,737 I seem to recall you were very happy with my promotion, too. 722 00:40:48,821 --> 00:40:50,238 What were you thinking? 723 00:40:51,574 --> 00:40:56,244 I don't know. I wasn't even aware this was going on. 724 00:40:56,329 --> 00:40:59,581 You're not aware of a Iot of things going on now. 725 00:41:01,668 --> 00:41:03,835 - Kate... - I don't wanna talk about this. 726 00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:06,380 I'm gonna unpack my bag and go to sleep. 727 00:41:06,464 --> 00:41:09,049 We're done. It's done. 728 00:41:11,135 --> 00:41:13,762 It's gonna end just Iike that? 729 00:41:13,846 --> 00:41:15,305 Come on, man. Don't Iet her pimp you. 730 00:41:15,390 --> 00:41:17,557 She wanna go to sleep? Knock her ass out. 731 00:41:17,934 --> 00:41:20,894 Joe, shut the hell up. They're having a private conversation 732 00:41:20,979 --> 00:41:23,480 in a room about not being aware of what's going on. 733 00:41:23,564 --> 00:41:25,565 If he ain't aware, that is between the two of them. 734 00:41:25,650 --> 00:41:28,610 Shut up. Let them have their private moment, please. 735 00:41:28,695 --> 00:41:32,364 When a door is closed, that mean you ain't supposed to be Iistening. 736 00:41:32,448 --> 00:41:34,866 Leave them people alone. Shut the hell up. 737 00:41:34,951 --> 00:41:36,827 - Mabel, you shut up. - No, you shut the hell up. 738 00:41:36,911 --> 00:41:38,954 Mabel, I'm older than you. I'll do whatever the hell I want to do. 739 00:41:39,038 --> 00:41:40,539 Yeah, it's my house. You gonna shut up up in here 740 00:41:40,623 --> 00:41:42,499 or I'm gonna come up and cut your vocal cords out. 741 00:41:42,583 --> 00:41:44,084 You ain't gonna be able to say a damn thing! 742 00:41:44,293 --> 00:41:45,293 Good night. 743 00:41:58,516 --> 00:42:00,058 What the hell? 744 00:42:02,437 --> 00:42:04,479 Boy! Boy! 745 00:42:08,985 --> 00:42:10,652 Is that you farting, son? 746 00:42:11,529 --> 00:42:13,280 It wasn't me. 747 00:42:14,198 --> 00:42:15,699 Fart one more time. That's all I'm gonna tell you. 748 00:42:15,783 --> 00:42:17,576 Fart one more time. 749 00:42:19,120 --> 00:42:21,121 In here farting Iike that. 750 00:42:21,873 --> 00:42:25,000 What's wrong with you, boy? That's doggone insane. 751 00:42:25,084 --> 00:42:26,877 Hello, Joe. 752 00:42:27,545 --> 00:42:29,588 You wanna give it a go? 753 00:42:31,466 --> 00:42:33,175 Mabel. 754 00:42:34,886 --> 00:42:38,472 Mabel, they trying to get me. 755 00:42:39,640 --> 00:42:41,308 No, no, trying to get me 756 00:42:41,392 --> 00:42:44,352 Iike they get them football players and them basketball players. 757 00:42:44,437 --> 00:42:48,732 I don't think so. No, no, no. 758 00:42:48,816 --> 00:42:50,317 I won't bite. 759 00:43:10,254 --> 00:43:12,756 Lord, Lord, Lord. 760 00:43:15,968 --> 00:43:17,511 You staring at me? 761 00:43:19,472 --> 00:43:23,100 No, no, I wasn't staring at you. 762 00:43:23,184 --> 00:43:24,392 Okay. 763 00:43:25,228 --> 00:43:28,396 I was watching the wildebeest in its natural habitat, though. 764 00:43:28,481 --> 00:43:30,148 Excuse me? 765 00:43:33,653 --> 00:43:34,820 That's not nice. 766 00:43:34,904 --> 00:43:39,157 Yeah. Her butt must be hungry, 'cause it's chewing that dress alive. 767 00:43:41,869 --> 00:43:45,539 If you need anything, anything at all, 768 00:43:47,250 --> 00:43:49,668 I'm just a whisper away. 769 00:43:49,752 --> 00:43:51,545 AII you got to do is whisper. 770 00:43:56,425 --> 00:43:58,552 Okay, I think I'm done. 771 00:43:59,262 --> 00:44:01,388 Where you rushing off to? 772 00:44:02,682 --> 00:44:04,850 - Yoga's over. - Okay. 773 00:44:04,934 --> 00:44:06,017 Creepy. 774 00:44:06,102 --> 00:44:07,435 - Hi. - How you doing? 775 00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:09,771 - I'm good. Thank you. - I see you was up in there doing that yoda. 776 00:44:09,856 --> 00:44:12,190 It's yoga. 777 00:44:12,275 --> 00:44:14,317 No, baby, I don't have no yogurt. I don't eat that. 778 00:44:14,402 --> 00:44:17,863 That mess my stomach up. It's got that abiffidus bacalarus in it. 779 00:44:17,947 --> 00:44:19,948 I can't have that. So you go on and get yourself something else. 780 00:44:20,032 --> 00:44:22,784 I might have some in that fridge there, but I don't eat it. 781 00:44:22,869 --> 00:44:24,077 Well, it Iooks Iike you've been cooking. 782 00:44:24,203 --> 00:44:26,329 Yeah, I wanted to feed your family their first day in my house. 783 00:44:26,414 --> 00:44:28,707 I wanted to make sure y'all had something really good to eat. 784 00:44:28,791 --> 00:44:33,545 So I got some waffles, some biscuits, I got some pancakes, I got some bacon, 785 00:44:33,629 --> 00:44:35,547 I got ham. I put a Iot of butter on the ham, 786 00:44:35,631 --> 00:44:37,465 a Iot of salt and pepper, make it nice and flavorful. 787 00:44:37,550 --> 00:44:38,842 I got oatmeal on the stove. 788 00:44:38,926 --> 00:44:40,218 I got sausage, 789 00:44:40,303 --> 00:44:42,804 and I got eggs and grits and everything else. 790 00:44:42,889 --> 00:44:44,723 Y'all betterjust feast. 791 00:44:46,809 --> 00:44:48,393 It Iooks so good. 792 00:44:48,477 --> 00:44:51,354 It's a Iot of carbs. You Iike carbs? 793 00:44:51,439 --> 00:44:52,772 - It's a Iot of... - Carbs. 794 00:44:52,899 --> 00:44:54,983 No, baby, I don't eat crabs. You can't eat no crabs. 795 00:44:55,067 --> 00:44:57,819 You gonna have crabs and yogurt? You about to mess your stomach up. 796 00:44:57,904 --> 00:45:00,155 Ain't no seafood on here, honey. I'm allergic to seafood. 797 00:45:00,239 --> 00:45:01,573 Ain't no seafood here nowhere. 798 00:45:01,657 --> 00:45:03,408 Is that how you stay so thin? 799 00:45:03,492 --> 00:45:06,036 No, honey, I don't eat that stuff. Where your family? 800 00:45:06,120 --> 00:45:08,205 They're sleeping still. 801 00:45:08,289 --> 00:45:10,957 What? They got to get up. 802 00:45:11,500 --> 00:45:14,628 No, baby, your children got to go to school. I got to get them registered, 803 00:45:14,754 --> 00:45:17,214 and George is supposed to see Brian down at the attorney's office. 804 00:45:17,298 --> 00:45:19,090 So, no, no, no, you got to get them up. 805 00:45:19,175 --> 00:45:21,843 Okay, well, I was just gonna Iet... You know, they're so exhausted. 806 00:45:21,928 --> 00:45:24,179 - No, I'll go get them up. Here, you take this. - Okay. 807 00:45:24,263 --> 00:45:25,472 Take this and stir that real good. 808 00:45:25,598 --> 00:45:27,641 - Whip it real, real good. You understand? - Yeah, I understand. 809 00:45:27,767 --> 00:45:29,768 AII right, you need to put something... Here. 810 00:45:29,852 --> 00:45:31,603 Here, put this on. Put this on while you whip. 811 00:45:31,687 --> 00:45:33,188 - You don't wanna get that on you. - Okay. No. 812 00:45:33,272 --> 00:45:34,481 - Put that on. Okay, whip it. - Thank you. 813 00:45:34,607 --> 00:45:36,650 - Whip it real good. - I will. 814 00:45:41,864 --> 00:45:44,449 George, get up out this bed, son. 815 00:45:48,871 --> 00:45:50,038 Kate. 816 00:45:51,457 --> 00:45:53,792 I had this horrible dream 817 00:45:54,126 --> 00:45:57,587 that we were in trouble with the FBI, 818 00:45:57,672 --> 00:46:01,633 and we moved into this house with an old woman who Iooked Iike... 819 00:46:03,219 --> 00:46:04,302 Like what? 820 00:46:05,388 --> 00:46:06,513 You. 821 00:46:07,556 --> 00:46:11,184 It's not a dream. It's really happening. 822 00:46:11,644 --> 00:46:13,353 I'm in so deep. 823 00:46:15,690 --> 00:46:18,817 George, you need to get up out this bed. Brian is waiting for you down at the office. 824 00:46:18,901 --> 00:46:20,610 He said he was gonna have you come down there this morning. 825 00:46:20,695 --> 00:46:22,445 Now, get up on out this bed. 826 00:46:22,530 --> 00:46:25,699 My Iife is over. I'm not getting out of this bed. 827 00:46:25,825 --> 00:46:28,034 There's no reason to get out of this bed. 828 00:46:28,160 --> 00:46:31,538 You need a reason? You need a reason? 829 00:46:33,749 --> 00:46:36,251 You better get your ass out this bed. 830 00:46:40,881 --> 00:46:43,258 Is that enough reason for you? 831 00:46:43,342 --> 00:46:44,426 Let me tell you something, son. 832 00:46:44,510 --> 00:46:47,512 I don't allow nobody to feel sorry for themselves in my house. 833 00:46:47,596 --> 00:46:49,389 I don't know what you did. I don't care what you did. 834 00:46:49,515 --> 00:46:50,515 Do you understand? 835 00:46:50,599 --> 00:46:52,183 I need you to get up out this bed, come downstairs, 836 00:46:52,268 --> 00:46:55,103 have breakfast with your family, Brian is waiting on you down at the office 837 00:46:55,187 --> 00:46:56,521 to talk about whatever y'all need to talk about. 838 00:46:56,605 --> 00:46:59,983 It ain't my business. I don't wanna know, but you gonna get up out this bed. 839 00:47:00,067 --> 00:47:01,943 If I come back up these stairs, and you still in this bed, 840 00:47:02,028 --> 00:47:03,653 do you have any idea what I'm gonna do? 841 00:47:03,738 --> 00:47:07,032 I'm gonna get completely naked, and get up in there with you and spoon. 842 00:47:08,242 --> 00:47:09,492 I'm up. 843 00:47:09,577 --> 00:47:10,577 Thank you. 844 00:47:10,703 --> 00:47:13,955 I am definitely up. You don't have to come back. 845 00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:17,417 I'm coming right down. I'm coming right down. 846 00:47:19,253 --> 00:47:20,879 I'm on my way. 847 00:47:32,016 --> 00:47:33,058 Get up, son. 848 00:47:35,895 --> 00:47:36,936 What's wrong? 849 00:47:37,897 --> 00:47:39,689 You just scared me. 850 00:47:39,774 --> 00:47:44,069 You're just so huge. Like a giant bag of Skittles. 851 00:47:45,529 --> 00:47:47,822 AII right, you better get the hell up, 852 00:47:47,907 --> 00:47:49,741 or when I come back up in here, you know what's gonna happen? 853 00:47:49,867 --> 00:47:52,243 You gonna taste the rainbow. 854 00:47:52,328 --> 00:47:55,288 We need to move him to someplace safe now. 855 00:47:55,373 --> 00:47:57,540 Good idea. What do you suggest? 856 00:47:57,625 --> 00:47:59,709 I don't know, but first thing tomorrow morning, 857 00:47:59,794 --> 00:48:00,960 they're on a plane headed here. 858 00:48:01,045 --> 00:48:04,506 You figure it out and tell no one. Not even me. 859 00:48:06,050 --> 00:48:07,592 Sir, I've got kids at my house. 860 00:48:07,676 --> 00:48:09,302 I don't know what I would do with a whole family of... 861 00:48:09,387 --> 00:48:11,805 I don't know. You've been a prosecutor for over a year. 862 00:48:11,889 --> 00:48:15,058 This is a big case for you, Brian. Handle it. 863 00:48:15,393 --> 00:48:17,435 - Now, get up. - I'm up. I'm up. 864 00:48:17,561 --> 00:48:20,772 Probably dreaming about Skittles and Coca-Cola and Pepsi, 865 00:48:20,898 --> 00:48:23,233 diet soda and Mountain Dew and Honey Buns, 866 00:48:23,317 --> 00:48:25,193 and damn Krispy Kreme and everything else. 867 00:48:25,277 --> 00:48:26,319 So you're up? 868 00:48:26,445 --> 00:48:29,948 There you are, Sadie. You must iron the sheets. 869 00:48:30,074 --> 00:48:33,493 Mr. Needleman gets very angry if there are any wrinkles. 870 00:48:36,122 --> 00:48:37,956 Honey, who the hell is Sadie? 871 00:48:38,082 --> 00:48:40,083 Don't you use that kind of Ianguage with me. 872 00:48:40,167 --> 00:48:43,586 'Cause I'll have you fired. Do you understand? 873 00:48:43,671 --> 00:48:46,506 Mrs. Needleman. Okay, I get it. 874 00:48:46,632 --> 00:48:50,635 The mall is open, but there ain't nobody in there shopping. 875 00:48:52,429 --> 00:48:53,555 What's that smell? 876 00:48:53,639 --> 00:48:56,141 It's called food. I'm cooking. 877 00:48:56,267 --> 00:48:59,269 It smells up the whole house. It permeates. 878 00:48:59,353 --> 00:49:04,149 Thank you. You always were the best colored help we could ever find. 879 00:49:06,485 --> 00:49:09,279 Okay, Brian playing a joke on me. 880 00:49:09,363 --> 00:49:12,740 I'm being Punk'd. I know I'm being Punk'd. Where the camera at? 881 00:49:12,825 --> 00:49:14,784 Little girl, I need you to get up, honey. 882 00:49:14,869 --> 00:49:16,661 Go away. 883 00:49:22,209 --> 00:49:26,212 Never had no child talk to me Iike this before. Lordy. 884 00:49:26,338 --> 00:49:30,216 Honey, I got to bring y'all down to school and get you registered. Now, get up. 885 00:49:32,344 --> 00:49:34,137 I said, go away. 886 00:49:36,724 --> 00:49:39,851 She just yelled at me in my house. I don't know what she... 887 00:49:39,977 --> 00:49:41,269 Little girl, I'm gonna tell you one more time... 888 00:49:41,353 --> 00:49:43,396 I said, go away! 889 00:49:51,197 --> 00:49:52,989 I know she didn't just... 890 00:49:58,162 --> 00:50:00,163 Who the hell you think you talking to? 891 00:50:02,166 --> 00:50:05,084 Oh, my God! What is wrong with you? 892 00:50:05,211 --> 00:50:07,253 This is my house. 893 00:50:07,379 --> 00:50:09,881 You Iive by my rules when you are in my house. 894 00:50:10,007 --> 00:50:12,175 You're too young for that, Iittle girl. You don't want none of this. 895 00:50:12,259 --> 00:50:16,262 Please, do yourself a favor, honey. You do not want none of this. 896 00:50:16,388 --> 00:50:19,432 Behave while you're here. If not, you will... 897 00:50:22,895 --> 00:50:25,021 Girl, you... 898 00:50:25,105 --> 00:50:27,690 Girl, you just don't know... 899 00:50:31,445 --> 00:50:33,404 I don't know who she thinks she's talking to. 900 00:50:33,739 --> 00:50:35,198 She's insane. 901 00:50:39,703 --> 00:50:40,703 Hello? 902 00:50:41,455 --> 00:50:42,622 Is that you, son? 903 00:50:45,251 --> 00:50:47,585 - Yes, sir. - Well, come on in here. 904 00:50:50,047 --> 00:50:51,714 What are you doing here, Dad? 905 00:50:52,424 --> 00:50:54,592 Well, I'm feeling better, much better. 906 00:50:54,718 --> 00:50:58,763 No, you're not. You're supposed to be at home in bed. 907 00:50:58,889 --> 00:51:02,934 I just had to stop by here to make sure everything's all right. 908 00:51:03,435 --> 00:51:04,435 It's all fine. 909 00:51:04,937 --> 00:51:10,692 I've decided to tell the church the third Sunday I'm retiring. 910 00:51:11,151 --> 00:51:13,152 I thought you were gonna wait till summer to do that. 911 00:51:13,279 --> 00:51:16,698 No, I can't do that, son. I'm too tired. 912 00:51:16,782 --> 00:51:19,200 It'll sure make the burden so much easier 913 00:51:19,285 --> 00:51:24,247 to know that everything I've worked for all these years is gonna be Iooked after. 914 00:51:24,331 --> 00:51:27,625 I am very proud of you, son. Really proud of you. 915 00:51:28,961 --> 00:51:30,878 Don't be proud of me. 916 00:51:30,963 --> 00:51:33,506 Are you kidding me? I have to tell you I'm proud of you. 917 00:51:33,632 --> 00:51:36,759 You know something? After your mother died, 918 00:51:36,844 --> 00:51:38,136 I wasn't sure you were gonna make it. 919 00:51:39,179 --> 00:51:42,265 You were so far out there in those streets. 920 00:51:42,349 --> 00:51:44,183 But, praise the Lord, Iook at you now. 921 00:51:44,310 --> 00:51:48,938 Helping me run the church, handling our mortgage payment fund. 922 00:51:49,023 --> 00:51:50,648 No, I am very proud of you, son. 923 00:51:51,066 --> 00:51:53,443 You know, the congregation is gonna be a Iittle bit upset 924 00:51:53,527 --> 00:51:57,488 when I tell them that I'm retiring, so to ease the pain, 925 00:51:57,573 --> 00:52:01,701 I'm going to tell them that we have raised the money to pay off the church. 926 00:52:03,203 --> 00:52:04,954 They're gonna rejoice. 927 00:52:06,332 --> 00:52:07,790 Well done, son. 928 00:52:07,875 --> 00:52:09,208 Yes, sir. 929 00:52:18,510 --> 00:52:21,929 I don't see her out here. Y'all come on. Come on. Hurry up. 930 00:52:22,014 --> 00:52:25,391 She always nosy as hell, over there Iooking at everything. 931 00:52:25,476 --> 00:52:26,851 Hurry up. 932 00:52:31,899 --> 00:52:34,484 - Come on. Get in the car. - Madea. 933 00:52:34,568 --> 00:52:35,735 Madea. 934 00:52:35,944 --> 00:52:37,070 Hey, Hattie. 935 00:52:38,030 --> 00:52:39,197 How you doing? 936 00:52:39,281 --> 00:52:40,573 - I'm good, baby. - Open the door. 937 00:52:40,657 --> 00:52:43,284 - Come here a minute. - I can't talk to you right now, honey. 938 00:52:43,369 --> 00:52:46,287 This my cousins, and they done Iost all the pigmentation in their skin overnight. 939 00:52:46,372 --> 00:52:47,663 - Your cousins? - Yes. 940 00:52:47,748 --> 00:52:48,748 Can I help you? 941 00:52:48,832 --> 00:52:51,250 No, I got to take them to the doctor right now. 942 00:52:51,335 --> 00:52:53,544 I'll see you Iater on. Take care. 943 00:52:58,300 --> 00:53:00,051 And that's all you know? 944 00:53:00,135 --> 00:53:02,428 That's all I know. I swear it. 945 00:53:02,763 --> 00:53:04,055 I don't believe you. 946 00:53:05,140 --> 00:53:07,225 I'm telling you the truth. 947 00:53:07,643 --> 00:53:10,645 You're going to jail for a very Iong time. 948 00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:20,655 I can't go to jail. I didn't do anything wrong. 949 00:53:20,739 --> 00:53:23,116 George, calm down, okay? 950 00:53:23,784 --> 00:53:26,869 For what it's worth, I believe you. 951 00:53:27,871 --> 00:53:31,916 Oh, boy, somebody believes me. Isn't that wonderful? 952 00:53:32,000 --> 00:53:36,546 Let's crack open some champagne, because somebody believes me. 953 00:53:37,506 --> 00:53:39,424 Oh, God, I'm in trouble. 954 00:53:42,928 --> 00:53:47,432 I think they can believe you, too, but you have to help me make them believe. 955 00:53:48,183 --> 00:53:52,353 Just tell me what you want me to do. 956 00:53:52,438 --> 00:53:55,231 What do I need to do here? 957 00:53:55,315 --> 00:53:58,067 Okay, that's a good attitude, George. Really good attitude. 958 00:53:58,152 --> 00:54:01,028 Everything that wasn't shredded or destroyed is in these files. 959 00:54:01,113 --> 00:54:05,199 This is your ticket to freedom. You're the CFO. I'm sure you can find it. 960 00:54:05,951 --> 00:54:07,160 Okay, well, 961 00:54:07,411 --> 00:54:11,998 this is the crux of the problem here, Brian, 962 00:54:12,082 --> 00:54:17,211 because I can't seem to find anything in here that will help. 963 00:54:17,296 --> 00:54:19,172 I wanna help you. I really do. 964 00:54:19,256 --> 00:54:23,509 It doesn't make any sense for me not to wanna help. 965 00:54:23,594 --> 00:54:26,304 Now does it? Does it? No. No. 966 00:54:26,388 --> 00:54:29,849 I mean, don't you think I would help if I could? 967 00:54:33,604 --> 00:54:35,480 - Are you okay? - No, I just... 968 00:54:35,564 --> 00:54:38,441 I feel Iike I... I wanna hit something. 969 00:54:38,525 --> 00:54:40,359 Hit the chair. Hit something. 970 00:54:50,954 --> 00:54:51,996 I'm sorry. 971 00:55:07,846 --> 00:55:09,931 That was a Iovely evening. 972 00:55:11,850 --> 00:55:14,352 There ain't never been no evening, Iady. I don't know you. 973 00:55:14,853 --> 00:55:18,773 Stop it. There's no one around. 974 00:55:18,857 --> 00:55:21,859 Read my Iips, honey. I don't know you. 975 00:55:22,819 --> 00:55:25,363 You're the man in the boat. 976 00:55:25,489 --> 00:55:27,532 I ain't never had no boat. 977 00:55:31,328 --> 00:55:35,122 I bet if I showed you my tattoo, you might remember. 978 00:55:35,207 --> 00:55:38,000 What tattoo? What you fixing to show me? 979 00:55:42,881 --> 00:55:45,550 I believe you need to see a doctor about that, honey. 980 00:55:45,634 --> 00:55:48,886 No, that's Betty Boop. 981 00:55:50,889 --> 00:55:54,976 It might have been Betty Boop at one time, but Betty Boop done drooped. 982 00:55:55,060 --> 00:55:56,644 Betty Boop. 983 00:55:56,728 --> 00:55:59,397 You brought me over in your Iittle boat. 984 00:55:59,523 --> 00:56:04,735 Lady, for the Iast time, okay? First of all, you insulted me. 985 00:56:04,820 --> 00:56:06,153 'Cause I wouldn't have a Iittle boat. 986 00:56:06,238 --> 00:56:08,656 I'm not a canoe kind of man. You understand? 987 00:56:08,740 --> 00:56:12,493 I'm a yacht, a cruise ship, Noah's Ark up in this piece. 988 00:56:12,578 --> 00:56:15,746 Only time I was ever in a boat was that Iittle rowboat belonged to the Army 989 00:56:15,872 --> 00:56:17,748 when I was in New Orleans many years ago. 990 00:56:17,833 --> 00:56:21,002 I'd take people across the water over there from the bayou to the juke joint, 991 00:56:21,086 --> 00:56:22,503 and I'd charge them a nickel to get them over there. 992 00:56:22,588 --> 00:56:25,006 And they'd all take the ride and everything. I'd give them their change. 993 00:56:25,090 --> 00:56:28,426 And somebody gave me a 50-cent tip that night. 994 00:56:34,016 --> 00:56:35,516 You Barbara Betty Boop. 995 00:56:35,601 --> 00:56:39,437 Yes, I was a nurse in Company B. 996 00:56:41,440 --> 00:56:44,609 Yeah, I was in Company C over there with the colored troops. 997 00:56:44,735 --> 00:56:48,446 Me and a couple of my girlfriends followed you guys all the way to your barracks. 998 00:56:48,572 --> 00:56:50,948 Yeah, I remember it was four of you. 999 00:56:51,074 --> 00:56:57,371 It was Blanche, Rose, Dorothy, and you. 1000 00:57:00,626 --> 00:57:02,209 I don't even know how you remember that, honey. 1001 00:57:02,294 --> 00:57:05,212 That was 56, 57 years ago. 1002 00:57:05,297 --> 00:57:07,381 Fifty-three. 1003 00:57:07,466 --> 00:57:09,592 Because George is 52. 1004 00:57:11,970 --> 00:57:13,888 What that got to do with anything? 1005 00:57:16,308 --> 00:57:18,559 What day is it? 1006 00:57:19,061 --> 00:57:22,605 Lady, don't you start... What you trying to tell me? 1007 00:57:24,608 --> 00:57:25,983 Where am I? 1008 00:57:26,068 --> 00:57:28,736 I think you believe you're trying to tell me something about George. 1009 00:57:28,820 --> 00:57:30,571 - Oh, my goodness. - Hey. 1010 00:57:30,656 --> 00:57:32,406 I don't know where I am. 1011 00:57:38,830 --> 00:57:40,122 George? 1012 00:57:44,002 --> 00:57:45,086 - Brian. - Jake. 1013 00:57:45,170 --> 00:57:47,004 You cannot keep calling me Iike this, man. 1014 00:57:47,130 --> 00:57:48,964 I'm in the middle of an investigation. What are you doing? 1015 00:57:49,591 --> 00:57:52,843 My dad wants to announce that he's paying the church's mortgage off in three weeks. 1016 00:57:52,928 --> 00:57:54,512 I mean, what am I supposed to do? 1017 00:57:54,638 --> 00:57:56,347 Tell him the truth. 1018 00:57:56,473 --> 00:57:57,515 That will kill him. 1019 00:57:57,599 --> 00:57:59,934 He'll be very happy that you told him the truth. 1020 00:58:00,018 --> 00:58:01,602 I can't. I can't do it. 1021 00:58:01,687 --> 00:58:02,937 Jake. 1022 00:58:03,021 --> 00:58:05,022 That's him. That's the dude from the news! 1023 00:58:05,691 --> 00:58:06,941 I ought to kill you! 1024 00:58:07,025 --> 00:58:09,360 - Who is this? - I'm your worst nightmare. 1025 00:58:09,486 --> 00:58:10,778 Will you just... 1026 00:58:10,862 --> 00:58:14,865 You're my worst... I got news for you. I'm Iiving my worst nightmare, okay? 1027 00:58:14,991 --> 00:58:18,035 And besides, you're a Iittle short to be a nightmare, aren't you? 1028 00:58:18,120 --> 00:58:20,705 I'm short? He called me... He called me short? 1029 00:58:20,789 --> 00:58:22,373 I'm gonna bust your balls! 1030 00:58:22,457 --> 00:58:25,876 Well, why don't you get in Iine and bust my balls? 1031 00:58:26,002 --> 00:58:28,462 Because everybody else is busting my balls. 1032 00:58:28,547 --> 00:58:31,674 I don't have any balls Ieft, mister! How about that? 1033 00:58:32,175 --> 00:58:34,051 I'm gonna... Get off. 1034 00:58:34,511 --> 00:58:36,804 Calm down. Nobody's kicking balls. 1035 00:58:36,888 --> 00:58:39,181 George, Jake, I need you both to calm down. 1036 00:58:39,266 --> 00:58:40,725 Is everything all right out there? 1037 00:58:40,851 --> 00:58:42,059 Everything's fine. 1038 00:58:44,187 --> 00:58:45,980 Just keep working. It's all good. 1039 00:58:46,690 --> 00:58:48,733 George, this is Jake. 1040 00:58:49,401 --> 00:58:52,820 His father has a church, and they were gonna pay off their mortgage, 1041 00:58:52,904 --> 00:58:56,741 and they invested the money in Lockwise, and they Iost it all. 1042 00:58:56,825 --> 00:58:58,826 So he's a Iittle bit upset. 1043 00:58:58,910 --> 00:59:01,495 - I'm sorry. - You... 1044 00:59:02,914 --> 00:59:04,623 That's all you got to say? Is you sorry? 1045 00:59:04,708 --> 00:59:06,125 - Jake. - Hell... 1046 00:59:06,209 --> 00:59:08,461 Yeah. Okay, okay. You better watch yourself, 1047 00:59:08,545 --> 00:59:09,795 or I'm gonna give you a... 1048 00:59:09,880 --> 00:59:13,507 You see this? Big five. Big five. And you're gonna get it. 1049 00:59:13,592 --> 00:59:15,926 If I didn't have to go to the bathroom, you'd be in... 1050 00:59:16,011 --> 00:59:17,845 - Where's the bathroom, Brian? - Okay. 1051 00:59:17,929 --> 00:59:19,054 Third door on the Ieft. 1052 00:59:19,139 --> 00:59:21,056 - Third door on the Ieft. - Yeah. 1053 00:59:21,975 --> 00:59:23,350 Big five? 1054 00:59:24,644 --> 00:59:27,605 Jake, go home. 1055 00:59:28,899 --> 00:59:31,650 Get a grip, okay? Tell him the truth. 1056 00:59:32,110 --> 00:59:34,153 If anything comes up, I'll call you. 1057 00:59:34,237 --> 00:59:37,198 Can't you just go home? Elevator's right there. 1058 00:59:47,083 --> 00:59:48,876 How tall are you, son? 1059 00:59:50,128 --> 00:59:52,963 About 6 feet. 1060 00:59:53,298 --> 00:59:55,090 - About 6 feet? - Yeah. 1061 00:59:56,551 --> 00:59:58,719 Okay. Check. 1062 01:00:01,306 --> 01:00:03,057 You Iike soul music? 1063 01:00:05,477 --> 01:00:09,063 I do. I do. I Iove soul music. 1064 01:00:10,315 --> 01:00:11,649 R-E-S-P-E-C-T. 1065 01:00:11,775 --> 01:00:14,318 Find out what it mean to me. 1066 01:00:14,402 --> 01:00:16,237 No, I dig it. 1067 01:00:16,321 --> 01:00:18,739 You dig it. You dig it? 1068 01:00:20,826 --> 01:00:21,992 Check. 1069 01:00:27,332 --> 01:00:30,501 Your hair's really thick and curly. 1070 01:00:30,627 --> 01:00:33,087 Always been that thick and curly? 1071 01:00:33,171 --> 01:00:34,839 Yeah, it has. 1072 01:00:34,965 --> 01:00:37,758 When I was a kid, I had an afro that was, 1073 01:00:38,468 --> 01:00:41,512 you know, Iarge. 1074 01:00:41,930 --> 01:00:44,682 To here. Big, big hair. 1075 01:00:44,975 --> 01:00:48,394 No, you said it right. You had an afro. You didn't offend me. You had an afro. 1076 01:00:48,478 --> 01:00:50,271 That's what you called it, an afro. Check. 1077 01:00:50,355 --> 01:00:51,772 An afro. 1078 01:00:55,443 --> 01:00:56,777 Can you swim, son? 1079 01:00:58,321 --> 01:01:00,614 No. No. 1080 01:01:00,699 --> 01:01:03,701 I never got the hang of swimming. 1081 01:01:04,703 --> 01:01:08,372 Never got the hang of it. Yup. Check. 1082 01:01:09,207 --> 01:01:12,877 Hey, I was Iooking at your wife, she was doing that yoda. 1083 01:01:12,961 --> 01:01:15,671 And she got a nice Iittle butt. 1084 01:01:16,047 --> 01:01:18,215 But it ain't no booty, you know? 1085 01:01:18,341 --> 01:01:22,511 You Iike a butt, or you Iike a booty? 1086 01:01:23,680 --> 01:01:28,392 You Iike a booty, one that's a big, old booty to grab Iike handlebars and use? 1087 01:01:28,476 --> 01:01:31,729 Steer that thing where you want it to go, you know? 1088 01:01:31,855 --> 01:01:34,565 To be honest, 1089 01:01:34,649 --> 01:01:35,900 I Iove my wife. 1090 01:01:36,026 --> 01:01:38,402 She can't hear you. She can't hear. Man-to-man, go on and tell me. 1091 01:01:38,486 --> 01:01:41,655 Do you Iike a Iittle cute, nice Iittle butt, or do you Iike a big butt 1092 01:01:41,740 --> 01:01:44,366 that you can grab that thing and slap it Iike handlebars? 1093 01:01:45,869 --> 01:01:50,247 Well, I would Iike a Iittle more on the bottom. 1094 01:01:50,332 --> 01:01:51,749 Harley-Davidson. 1095 01:01:51,875 --> 01:01:52,917 - A Harley? - Yeah. 1096 01:01:53,043 --> 01:01:54,418 Junk in the trunk. 1097 01:01:54,502 --> 01:01:58,005 Some junk in the trunk. Yeah, more junk. 1098 01:02:00,008 --> 01:02:01,508 As Iong as you're asking. 1099 01:02:04,596 --> 01:02:07,014 I got one Iast question for you, son. 1100 01:02:07,766 --> 01:02:11,936 When you go to the bathroom and you're at the urinal, 1101 01:02:12,771 --> 01:02:14,939 do you stand there Iike this? 1102 01:02:16,441 --> 01:02:19,526 Or do you just happen to stand there Iike this? 1103 01:02:21,404 --> 01:02:22,446 Well... 1104 01:02:22,530 --> 01:02:25,032 And when you're finished, do you have to do this? 1105 01:02:28,370 --> 01:02:30,537 Which one is it for you, son? Which one? 1106 01:02:30,622 --> 01:02:33,624 Well, more Iike the second part. 1107 01:02:34,459 --> 01:02:36,794 Without the thing at the end. 1108 01:02:38,296 --> 01:02:39,463 Check. 1109 01:02:40,256 --> 01:02:43,217 Damn. I'm your daddy. 1110 01:02:45,720 --> 01:02:46,887 Excuse me? 1111 01:02:47,389 --> 01:02:49,306 Do you have any Wi-Fi? 1112 01:02:50,266 --> 01:02:52,977 Well, if you ask me nice, I'll get up and I'll make you some. 1113 01:02:54,312 --> 01:02:57,147 Excuse me. How do you make Wi-Fi? 1114 01:02:58,441 --> 01:03:01,652 Son, you use some flour, put a Iittle water in it, some powdered sugar, 1115 01:03:01,736 --> 01:03:03,404 you mix it up real good, and you get your skillet, 1116 01:03:03,488 --> 01:03:04,905 or you get you one of them Wi-Fi irons, 1117 01:03:04,990 --> 01:03:08,158 and you pour it in the Wi-Fi iron and you close it up. 1118 01:03:08,243 --> 01:03:10,494 I got a Wi-Fi iron in there. 1119 01:03:10,620 --> 01:03:12,246 What are you talking about? 1120 01:03:13,331 --> 01:03:16,667 He asked for a Wi-Fi, I got a waffle. You want a Wi-Fi? I got a waffle. 1121 01:03:16,793 --> 01:03:18,961 Wi-Fi. Internet. 1122 01:03:20,839 --> 01:03:22,673 I don't have none of that. 1123 01:03:22,757 --> 01:03:25,759 Ain't no technology around here at all. We've been Ieft in the Dark Ages. 1124 01:03:26,511 --> 01:03:28,262 It figures. 1125 01:03:28,346 --> 01:03:29,430 Howie. 1126 01:03:29,514 --> 01:03:31,015 Honey, why do you need to get on the Internet? 1127 01:03:31,141 --> 01:03:32,599 I'm supposed to do a report. 1128 01:03:32,684 --> 01:03:35,019 I'll help you with your report. Okay, honey? 1129 01:03:35,103 --> 01:03:37,354 It doesn't really matter. I mean, he's gonna fail. 1130 01:03:37,689 --> 01:03:40,107 - He's dumb Iike his mother. - Enough. 1131 01:03:40,191 --> 01:03:41,775 Go to hell, Kate. 1132 01:03:44,946 --> 01:03:46,989 Did that child just say, "Go to hell"? 1133 01:03:53,788 --> 01:03:54,955 You all right? 1134 01:03:55,040 --> 01:03:56,957 Yeah. Thanks. 1135 01:03:57,042 --> 01:03:59,376 Come on, sit down and talk to me. 1136 01:04:00,628 --> 01:04:03,756 That child right there. Lord, that Iittle girl about to make me hurt her. 1137 01:04:03,840 --> 01:04:06,800 I know. I'm trying to be understanding. 1138 01:04:06,885 --> 01:04:08,177 Of what? 1139 01:04:09,137 --> 01:04:10,846 She has problems. 1140 01:04:10,930 --> 01:04:12,014 Honey, we all got problems. 1141 01:04:12,098 --> 01:04:14,767 That child ain't supposed to be talking to you all Iike that. That is crazy. 1142 01:04:14,851 --> 01:04:17,603 What's wrong with that child? What's she so angry about? 1143 01:04:17,687 --> 01:04:20,355 I don't know. Just being here and out of school. 1144 01:04:20,440 --> 01:04:22,149 Tell that to somebody else, honey. 1145 01:04:22,233 --> 01:04:26,487 That child is angry about something else, and it's deep, whatever it is. 1146 01:04:26,571 --> 01:04:31,158 It ain't about no school and nothing else. This water runs deeper than that. 1147 01:04:31,242 --> 01:04:32,534 How do you know? 1148 01:04:32,786 --> 01:04:35,412 Wisdom. I didn't get this old by not knowing nothing. 1149 01:04:37,624 --> 01:04:41,210 She thinks I'm the reason that her father divorced her mother. 1150 01:04:42,504 --> 01:04:44,838 I wonder where she'd get that from. 1151 01:04:44,923 --> 01:04:46,090 Are you? 1152 01:04:46,174 --> 01:04:48,842 No. What kind of person do you think I am? 1153 01:04:49,594 --> 01:04:51,095 A woman. 1154 01:04:52,013 --> 01:04:54,473 No, their marriage was over, 1155 01:04:54,557 --> 01:04:59,186 her father filed for divorce already, but she's hated me ever since she met me. 1156 01:04:59,771 --> 01:05:01,688 And George just sit there, don't say nothing? 1157 01:05:01,773 --> 01:05:03,315 He just sit there and not say a word? 1158 01:05:03,775 --> 01:05:06,235 George doesn't say anything to anyone these days. 1159 01:05:06,861 --> 01:05:08,195 Lord, have mercy. 1160 01:05:08,279 --> 01:05:10,030 I know. But she needs him. 1161 01:05:10,115 --> 01:05:12,324 Because her mother, she is so evil. 1162 01:05:12,408 --> 01:05:15,828 She filled her head with all these horrible things about me and about us. 1163 01:05:15,912 --> 01:05:17,287 And then, two years ago, 1164 01:05:17,372 --> 01:05:20,833 she dropped her off at our doorstep, hasn't contacted her ever since, 1165 01:05:20,917 --> 01:05:22,417 and now she's angry. 1166 01:05:22,627 --> 01:05:24,878 And now she's up in my house and she got me worried. 1167 01:05:24,963 --> 01:05:25,963 Honey, I'm just worried. 1168 01:05:26,422 --> 01:05:27,673 She'll be fine. 1169 01:05:27,757 --> 01:05:29,633 I'm not worried about her, I'm worried about me. 1170 01:05:29,717 --> 01:05:31,510 'Cause I feel Iike I wanna choke her to sleep. 1171 01:05:31,594 --> 01:05:33,804 I just wanna grab her till the Iife is out of her sometimes. 1172 01:05:33,888 --> 01:05:35,013 She's so flip. 1173 01:05:35,098 --> 01:05:36,431 Yeah, I get it. 1174 01:05:36,516 --> 01:05:39,393 And when she talk back to you, you just have a Iittle argument with her 1175 01:05:39,477 --> 01:05:42,146 and you just Iet her start her mouth and say whatever she want to say? 1176 01:05:42,230 --> 01:05:43,313 Don't do that, honey. 1177 01:05:43,398 --> 01:05:46,859 You have to talk to her in a Ianguage that she understand. 1178 01:05:46,943 --> 01:05:49,653 You got to Iearn how to start speaking your damn mind. 1179 01:05:49,737 --> 01:05:50,821 I speak my mind. 1180 01:05:50,905 --> 01:05:54,074 I didn't say, "Speak your mind," I said, "Speak your damn mind." 1181 01:05:54,159 --> 01:05:56,285 If somebody do something you don't Iike, you say, 1182 01:05:56,369 --> 01:05:57,995 "Hey, what the hell is wrong with you? 1183 01:05:58,079 --> 01:06:00,372 "You better get your ass together. This is some straight up bull. 1184 01:06:00,456 --> 01:06:03,458 "Hell, what is wrong with you? You heard me? Hell." 1185 01:06:04,127 --> 01:06:06,295 That's what you got to say to them sometime. 1186 01:06:06,963 --> 01:06:08,630 - Okay. I will. - Think about that. 1187 01:06:08,715 --> 01:06:10,465 It'll make you feel better. You'll feel so Iiberated. 1188 01:06:10,550 --> 01:06:13,510 You're around here doing all that yoda. Honey, you ain't got to do all that yoda. 1189 01:06:13,595 --> 01:06:15,137 You ain't got to do not one more yoda. 1190 01:06:15,680 --> 01:06:17,014 I'm gonna try that next time. 1191 01:06:17,098 --> 01:06:18,640 Good. I just gave you some great advice. 1192 01:06:18,725 --> 01:06:20,058 You gave me some good advice. 1193 01:06:20,143 --> 01:06:21,351 I'm gonna give you some better advice. 1194 01:06:21,436 --> 01:06:22,477 White folks ain't supposed to be out here 1195 01:06:22,562 --> 01:06:24,146 on this porch in the middle of the night, honey. 1196 01:06:24,230 --> 01:06:25,230 Okay. 1197 01:06:25,315 --> 01:06:27,357 Yep. Nope, come on, Iet's go on in the house. 1198 01:06:27,442 --> 01:06:29,234 - Thank you. - Yeah, you go on first. 1199 01:06:31,654 --> 01:06:33,405 Any luck? 1200 01:06:34,199 --> 01:06:35,699 No, none. 1201 01:06:37,118 --> 01:06:38,160 George. 1202 01:06:38,244 --> 01:06:42,456 Yeah, I know what you're going to say. You don't think I'm trying. 1203 01:06:43,291 --> 01:06:45,417 Look at this charity, right here. 1204 01:06:46,002 --> 01:06:48,879 Okay. I don't really have to Iook at it. 1205 01:06:48,963 --> 01:06:51,673 Hear me out. Listen to what I'm saying to you. 1206 01:06:51,758 --> 01:06:53,800 These guys dig wells in Africa. 1207 01:06:54,385 --> 01:06:56,428 This one, breast cancer. 1208 01:06:56,512 --> 01:07:00,974 This one, they stop sex trafficking of children. Okay? 1209 01:07:01,059 --> 01:07:03,477 This one, AIDS research. This one, cancer. 1210 01:07:03,561 --> 01:07:05,604 This homeless shelter is gonna have to close. 1211 01:07:05,688 --> 01:07:08,649 George, you got to help me help these people. 1212 01:07:16,199 --> 01:07:20,744 Brian, I'm eight years away from retiring, 1213 01:07:21,955 --> 01:07:24,164 and now I'm facing jail. 1214 01:07:24,666 --> 01:07:26,959 And all these people were hurt 1215 01:07:27,835 --> 01:07:30,379 because I wasn't paying attention. 1216 01:07:32,799 --> 01:07:35,050 And I was Iooking forward to retiring. 1217 01:07:37,053 --> 01:07:39,096 Spending time with my son. 1218 01:07:40,515 --> 01:07:44,559 Getting great, big bear hugs after a good game of catch, you know? 1219 01:07:45,812 --> 01:07:47,354 Seeing my daughter happy, 1220 01:07:48,773 --> 01:07:50,023 content. 1221 01:07:52,068 --> 01:07:55,654 I just wanted to Iive happily ever after with my family. 1222 01:07:56,864 --> 01:08:01,118 And now, my family's falling apart. 1223 01:08:01,661 --> 01:08:05,580 So maybe I deserve all of this, okay? 1224 01:08:05,665 --> 01:08:09,001 'Cause I can't believe what's happening to me. 1225 01:08:09,085 --> 01:08:11,795 How could I not see this coming? 1226 01:08:11,879 --> 01:08:16,550 George, you couldn't see it because you weren't paying attention. 1227 01:08:16,634 --> 01:08:18,510 But now your eyes are wide open. 1228 01:08:20,722 --> 01:08:23,307 But none of this makes sense to me. 1229 01:08:23,391 --> 01:08:27,311 I mean, I see accounts here and they all start with a Ietter of the alphabet. 1230 01:08:27,395 --> 01:08:32,441 "A," "P," "U," "J," "K," "R," "I." 1231 01:08:32,900 --> 01:08:36,153 We never use the alphabet to start accounts, Brian. 1232 01:08:36,237 --> 01:08:39,656 I don't know what I'm Iooking at here. I really don't. 1233 01:08:41,909 --> 01:08:45,662 You can't just keep Ietting people walk all over you. 1234 01:08:46,497 --> 01:08:50,292 You were a mark. They set you up. They thought you were weak. 1235 01:08:51,502 --> 01:08:53,754 They did this on purpose to you. 1236 01:08:53,838 --> 01:08:55,380 Are you just gonna Iay down and Iet that happen, 1237 01:08:55,465 --> 01:08:56,965 or are you gonna claim your Iife back? 1238 01:08:57,050 --> 01:08:59,926 Prove them wrong. Hit them right between the eyes. 1239 01:09:00,928 --> 01:09:05,265 You're stronger than this. There is a fighter in you, George. 1240 01:09:06,392 --> 01:09:09,019 Show them. Show me. 1241 01:09:09,103 --> 01:09:13,023 You can work this out, okay? Just don't give up. 1242 01:09:15,651 --> 01:09:17,319 Shall we keep digging? 1243 01:09:17,403 --> 01:09:19,112 - Okay. - Okay. 1244 01:09:19,197 --> 01:09:20,906 - Okay. - AII right. 1245 01:09:21,366 --> 01:09:22,657 Watch your step. 1246 01:09:25,912 --> 01:09:27,371 Take care now. 1247 01:09:32,960 --> 01:09:34,086 How was school? 1248 01:09:34,170 --> 01:09:36,004 I mean, you know, it's school. 1249 01:09:36,130 --> 01:09:37,506 School is school, yeah. 1250 01:09:37,590 --> 01:09:39,049 What you got there? 1251 01:09:39,133 --> 01:09:41,009 - Baseball. - Baseball. 1252 01:09:41,094 --> 01:09:42,135 You play? 1253 01:09:42,428 --> 01:09:45,055 Yeah, but not very good. 1254 01:09:45,139 --> 01:09:46,515 Really? 1255 01:09:46,891 --> 01:09:48,642 Well, Iet me see, son. You can't be that bad. 1256 01:09:48,726 --> 01:09:50,227 - What position do you play? - Pitcher. 1257 01:09:50,311 --> 01:09:51,645 Okay. Well, I used to play catcher. 1258 01:09:51,729 --> 01:09:53,605 So, you go on over there and I want you to throw it to me. 1259 01:09:53,689 --> 01:09:54,815 - AII right. - I want you to throw it to me 1260 01:09:54,899 --> 01:09:55,982 as hard as you can. 1261 01:09:56,776 --> 01:09:58,693 - Throw it at me. - AII right. 1262 01:09:58,778 --> 01:10:00,320 Here we go. Put it. Put it right here. 1263 01:10:00,405 --> 01:10:02,948 - Put it right in the middle. - Right here, right here. 1264 01:10:06,994 --> 01:10:08,620 Yeah, you... Yeah. 1265 01:10:08,704 --> 01:10:10,747 - Yeah, you suck. - Sorry, I... 1266 01:10:11,749 --> 01:10:13,667 Come here, son. 1267 01:10:15,086 --> 01:10:16,378 That's all right, son. 1268 01:10:16,462 --> 01:10:19,714 Maybe you ain't supposed to be a pitcher. Everybody ain't supposed to be a pitcher. 1269 01:10:19,799 --> 01:10:21,842 You know, you got to get in where you fit in. 1270 01:10:21,926 --> 01:10:23,552 You know, I never thought about it that way. 1271 01:10:23,636 --> 01:10:24,928 But Iisten, son. I'm gonna help you. 1272 01:10:25,012 --> 01:10:28,014 I'm gonna teach you how to pitch and to catch, 1273 01:10:28,099 --> 01:10:30,100 because we family, we family. 1274 01:10:30,476 --> 01:10:32,060 - We are? - Yeah. 1275 01:10:32,145 --> 01:10:35,689 Yeah. It's a Iong story. It's a Iong story. 1276 01:10:35,773 --> 01:10:37,315 I used to be in the Negro League. 1277 01:10:38,568 --> 01:10:40,610 - Negro... - The Negro League, son. 1278 01:10:40,695 --> 01:10:44,072 Boy, somebody got to teach you about your heritage. 1279 01:10:44,157 --> 01:10:50,787 The Negro Leagues is when colored baseball players couldn't play... 1280 01:10:51,622 --> 01:10:53,623 Colored, Iike Negro, Iike me and you. 1281 01:10:53,708 --> 01:10:58,253 They couldn't play professional baseball, so they came up with their own Ieague. 1282 01:10:58,337 --> 01:10:59,880 Satchel Paige and I played. 1283 01:10:59,964 --> 01:11:03,800 I was a catcher, so I'm gonna show you how to be a catcher. 1284 01:11:03,885 --> 01:11:05,218 - AII right. AII right. - AII right? 1285 01:11:05,303 --> 01:11:07,345 Step on back there. I'm gonna show you how to catch this. 1286 01:11:07,472 --> 01:11:09,055 - I'm gonna throw it to you one good time. - AII right. 1287 01:11:09,140 --> 01:11:11,641 - I want you to concentrate real hard. - AII right. 1288 01:11:13,644 --> 01:11:16,313 Almost. AII right, try it. Right here, right here. 1289 01:11:16,564 --> 01:11:17,856 There we go. See that? 1290 01:11:18,191 --> 01:11:20,066 - I've had it. - I don't care. 1291 01:11:20,151 --> 01:11:21,151 Change your attitude. 1292 01:11:21,235 --> 01:11:22,652 - Hello, son. - Hi, Mom. 1293 01:11:22,737 --> 01:11:24,654 - Your poor father... - My father does not need... 1294 01:11:24,739 --> 01:11:27,991 Were you with your brother today? AII day today, again? 1295 01:11:28,826 --> 01:11:32,037 No, Mom, I was with Brian. 1296 01:11:32,163 --> 01:11:34,331 I don't have a brother, remember? 1297 01:11:34,874 --> 01:11:36,416 This is all an act! 1298 01:11:36,501 --> 01:11:37,501 Right. 1299 01:11:37,585 --> 01:11:38,627 I am not being disrespectful! 1300 01:11:38,711 --> 01:11:41,254 You're being so fake! You're not my mom! 1301 01:11:41,339 --> 01:11:42,672 - ...your attitude. - You're making it no better. 1302 01:11:42,757 --> 01:11:43,757 Get upstairs! 1303 01:11:43,841 --> 01:11:46,551 I want to go home. I hate it here. 1304 01:11:47,011 --> 01:11:48,261 - Hi. - Hi. 1305 01:11:48,721 --> 01:11:50,847 George, I can't do this anymore. 1306 01:11:50,932 --> 01:11:52,849 - That daughter is so disrespectful. - I know. 1307 01:11:52,934 --> 01:11:56,770 I'm gonna do all I can to help us get our Iife back. 1308 01:11:56,854 --> 01:11:59,022 I don't want our Iife back. 1309 01:11:59,941 --> 01:12:01,358 I want a new Iife. 1310 01:12:01,442 --> 01:12:04,528 One where you're in it. One where we're all happy. 1311 01:12:04,612 --> 01:12:08,406 I don't know, afternoon Iunches and sex! 1312 01:12:08,533 --> 01:12:10,242 I want sex, George! 1313 01:12:10,868 --> 01:12:12,410 Should I be Iistening to this? 1314 01:12:12,537 --> 01:12:13,745 - No! - No! 1315 01:12:15,289 --> 01:12:18,083 Kate, I'm sorry. 1316 01:12:18,584 --> 01:12:21,753 Stop saying sorry and get mad. 1317 01:12:21,879 --> 01:12:23,922 - I am mad. - You're not mad. 1318 01:12:24,048 --> 01:12:26,174 I'm extremely mad. 1319 01:12:26,259 --> 01:12:27,884 Extremely mad, George? 1320 01:12:30,054 --> 01:12:31,346 You don't think I'm mad? 1321 01:12:31,430 --> 01:12:32,889 I don't think you're mad. 1322 01:12:35,393 --> 01:12:38,979 This is getting me so mad, this whole thing. 1323 01:12:39,063 --> 01:12:40,188 That's mad. 1324 01:12:40,273 --> 01:12:42,899 You're not extremely mad! You need to get damn mad! 1325 01:12:43,442 --> 01:12:44,568 What? 1326 01:12:45,653 --> 01:12:47,904 I'm just speaking my damn mind, okay? 1327 01:12:47,989 --> 01:12:50,907 Hell! This is some straight up bull. 1328 01:12:51,325 --> 01:12:55,370 Hell, get your ass together. You heard me? 1329 01:12:55,454 --> 01:12:56,746 Hell! 1330 01:13:02,503 --> 01:13:04,296 I've got to get us out of here. 1331 01:13:07,258 --> 01:13:08,925 Just spill it. We gotta have it all. 1332 01:13:09,427 --> 01:13:12,178 Because if you don't, then you're going to jail for the rest of your Iife. 1333 01:13:15,266 --> 01:13:17,142 Ever since we got here, I don't care anymore. 1334 01:13:17,685 --> 01:13:19,352 Do you know what? I don't care. You... 1335 01:13:34,660 --> 01:13:36,953 - Hi, honey. - Hi. What are you doing? 1336 01:13:50,301 --> 01:13:53,386 - Good one. Good one, Howie. - Thanks. 1337 01:13:54,805 --> 01:13:55,805 You got it. 1338 01:14:13,532 --> 01:14:18,036 Amazing Grace... 1339 01:14:19,789 --> 01:14:21,665 How was school today? 1340 01:14:21,791 --> 01:14:24,626 About the same as when you were raised by Moses. 1341 01:14:25,044 --> 01:14:26,294 Where's my dad? 1342 01:14:26,379 --> 01:14:28,213 I can't stand you. 1343 01:14:30,383 --> 01:14:33,843 I got something to tell you, honey. It's awfully bad news. 1344 01:14:34,303 --> 01:14:35,887 Precious Lord... 1345 01:14:36,013 --> 01:14:37,222 What? 1346 01:14:40,309 --> 01:14:41,893 Your daddy died. 1347 01:14:43,854 --> 01:14:44,979 What? 1348 01:14:45,064 --> 01:14:46,189 He died. 1349 01:14:47,525 --> 01:14:51,528 Them people that were Iooking for him, they came here and they got him. 1350 01:14:52,905 --> 01:14:54,698 And they brought him out there to the highway, 1351 01:14:54,824 --> 01:14:59,452 and they was painting them stripes on the stone highway, and he tried to run, 1352 01:14:59,537 --> 01:15:02,831 and one of them stripe machine put a Iine right down the middle of him. 1353 01:15:02,915 --> 01:15:06,209 Then the people that was coming didn't know if it was a passing Iane 1354 01:15:06,335 --> 01:15:08,878 or high-occupancy vehicle Iane. 1355 01:15:09,004 --> 01:15:10,588 Everybody got confused and they had a wreck, 1356 01:15:10,715 --> 01:15:11,881 and they just ran all over... 1357 01:15:12,007 --> 01:15:15,051 About 5,700 cars piled up on top of him. 1358 01:15:15,720 --> 01:15:19,472 And Kate, she didn't know what to do, so she went to running. 1359 01:15:19,557 --> 01:15:23,226 She just started running as fast as she can. Was running Iike Wonder Woman. 1360 01:15:23,352 --> 01:15:26,855 But they had a helichopter and that helichopter got closer... 1361 01:15:26,939 --> 01:15:28,189 And that was it. 1362 01:15:28,399 --> 01:15:30,024 No! Kate, too? 1363 01:15:30,568 --> 01:15:32,360 Kate, too. Kate, too. 1364 01:15:32,445 --> 01:15:34,487 And that helichopter was spinning and them blades... 1365 01:15:34,572 --> 01:15:37,532 Where's Howie? Where's Howie? 1366 01:15:38,909 --> 01:15:41,161 Oh, Lord. Poor Howie. You know, he tried to run, 1367 01:15:41,245 --> 01:15:44,414 but he always have them candy bars and soda pops in his pockets, 1368 01:15:44,540 --> 01:15:47,459 so he kept dropping things and he tripped. 1369 01:15:47,585 --> 01:15:49,794 So they put them cement shoes on him and they throwed him in, 1370 01:15:49,920 --> 01:15:51,087 and he's swimming with the fishes. 1371 01:15:51,213 --> 01:15:52,255 Oh, my God! 1372 01:15:53,132 --> 01:15:55,884 My God! I can't believe this is happening. 1373 01:15:55,968 --> 01:15:57,927 Why you so upset? 1374 01:15:58,053 --> 01:15:59,387 What do you mean? 1375 01:15:59,472 --> 01:16:03,057 Well, you always say, "I hate you. You suck. Shut up. I hate you." 1376 01:16:03,142 --> 01:16:06,478 I didn't mean anything that I've said before. 1377 01:16:06,604 --> 01:16:07,854 It's too Iate now, honey. 1378 01:16:07,938 --> 01:16:11,274 It's all right. They gone. Dead. Just done. 1379 01:16:11,984 --> 01:16:13,234 They gone. 1380 01:16:13,319 --> 01:16:16,988 So, the people at Child Welfare asked me if I would take you, 1381 01:16:17,114 --> 01:16:18,865 so I said you can stay here till you're 18, but you... 1382 01:16:18,949 --> 01:16:21,159 No! No, no! No! 1383 01:16:21,285 --> 01:16:23,620 I got an EBT card, what you worried about? 1384 01:16:23,746 --> 01:16:24,788 - Dad! - Honey. 1385 01:16:25,414 --> 01:16:27,457 Cindy, what's wrong? 1386 01:16:27,583 --> 01:16:29,459 She told me you died. 1387 01:16:29,668 --> 01:16:30,668 What? 1388 01:16:31,295 --> 01:16:33,838 Madea, why would you tell her that? 1389 01:16:33,964 --> 01:16:35,256 Look, this is why I tell her that. 1390 01:16:35,341 --> 01:16:38,134 'Cause she's sitting around here mad at everybody and being all nasty and mean. 1391 01:16:38,260 --> 01:16:41,638 Your parents could be gone at any minute, then you'll be stuck with somebody Iike me. 1392 01:16:41,764 --> 01:16:44,057 Is that what you want? To stay here in this hellhole? 1393 01:16:44,141 --> 01:16:45,183 I'm sorry. 1394 01:16:45,309 --> 01:16:47,602 Start acting Iike you're sorry, then. 1395 01:16:47,686 --> 01:16:49,604 I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Howie. 1396 01:16:49,688 --> 01:16:51,189 It's all right. It's all right, Cindy. 1397 01:16:51,315 --> 01:16:54,317 Now, Iook at her, all broke up, acting Iike she's sad and hurt. 1398 01:16:56,362 --> 01:16:58,279 Okay, honey. It's okay. 1399 01:16:58,364 --> 01:17:01,199 Madea, that was really cruel. 1400 01:17:01,325 --> 01:17:04,452 George? Shut the hell up. 1401 01:17:04,995 --> 01:17:06,830 It worked, didn't it? 1402 01:17:09,500 --> 01:17:11,417 - Dad? - Yeah, son. 1403 01:17:11,502 --> 01:17:12,585 There's something I need to tell you. 1404 01:17:12,670 --> 01:17:16,214 It'll have to wait till Iater. I got to start the service right now. 1405 01:17:21,595 --> 01:17:22,804 Negros. 1406 01:17:27,351 --> 01:17:28,935 What the hell did you just say? 1407 01:17:29,228 --> 01:17:31,312 - Negros. - Barbara! 1408 01:17:31,397 --> 01:17:32,605 Mom, 1409 01:17:32,982 --> 01:17:38,027 why don't we step out onto the porch and get some air? 1410 01:17:38,112 --> 01:17:40,071 - Negros. - Grams. 1411 01:17:40,155 --> 01:17:43,074 I hear Negros from my room. 1412 01:17:43,158 --> 01:17:46,536 I believe they're called African-Americans now, Grandma. 1413 01:17:46,620 --> 01:17:48,621 Did that child just say "they"? 1414 01:17:48,706 --> 01:17:50,415 No, "we." 1415 01:17:50,499 --> 01:17:54,127 So beautiful. I hear them from my room. 1416 01:17:54,211 --> 01:17:55,420 - Okay. - What's going on? 1417 01:17:55,504 --> 01:17:59,048 My baby mama just went Ieft, Mabel. She just went Ieft. 1418 01:17:59,133 --> 01:18:00,258 Went Ieft? 1419 01:18:00,342 --> 01:18:01,801 I hear... 1420 01:18:02,678 --> 01:18:06,806 I hear them from my room. I hear Negros from my room. 1421 01:18:06,891 --> 01:18:10,226 Well, I see dead people, but I keep that to myself. 1422 01:18:10,561 --> 01:18:11,936 Tell them, Sadie. 1423 01:18:12,021 --> 01:18:13,396 Who the hell is Sadie? 1424 01:18:14,064 --> 01:18:15,315 Shut up. 1425 01:18:15,816 --> 01:18:18,693 Madea, honey. She right, she hear Negros. 1426 01:18:21,363 --> 01:18:24,073 It's bad enough that she's slipping. 1427 01:18:24,158 --> 01:18:25,742 Please don't encourage her. 1428 01:18:25,826 --> 01:18:28,578 No, she do hear Negros. 1429 01:18:28,662 --> 01:18:30,121 The whole bunch of them. 1430 01:18:30,706 --> 01:18:33,750 She hears a bunch of Negros? 1431 01:18:35,502 --> 01:18:37,545 Yes, everybody Iisten. Everybody be quiet. 1432 01:18:39,965 --> 01:18:41,382 Spirituals. 1433 01:18:41,467 --> 01:18:44,177 That's it. That's what she's trying to say, Negro spirituals. 1434 01:18:44,261 --> 01:18:46,471 There's a church down on the corner. 1435 01:18:46,555 --> 01:18:48,973 They sing Negro spirituals on Sundays. 1436 01:18:49,058 --> 01:18:50,975 Why y'all so uptight? 1437 01:18:52,394 --> 01:18:55,939 Son, will you take me to the Negros? 1438 01:18:56,023 --> 01:18:58,358 - Take you to the Negro spiritual, honey. - Spiritual. 1439 01:18:58,442 --> 01:19:00,902 Right. You can't just say "Negros." Them days has passed. 1440 01:19:00,986 --> 01:19:02,904 First we were "Negros," then we was "colored," 1441 01:19:02,988 --> 01:19:05,490 then we were "black," now we "African-American." 1442 01:19:05,574 --> 01:19:08,701 Okay? African-Americans. Now singing old Negro spirituals. 1443 01:19:08,786 --> 01:19:09,953 - Spirituals. - Negro spirituals. 1444 01:19:10,037 --> 01:19:13,373 - Spirituals. Spirituals. Okay. - Yes, Mom. Yes, yes. 1445 01:19:13,457 --> 01:19:14,791 Yes, Iet's go. 1446 01:19:15,209 --> 01:19:18,586 Let's go down to the church. 1447 01:19:18,671 --> 01:19:19,712 Is it safe? 1448 01:19:20,089 --> 01:19:21,297 What you mean, "Is it safe," George? 1449 01:19:21,382 --> 01:19:24,050 What they gonna do, stone you with a Bible? It's a church. 1450 01:20:09,847 --> 01:20:11,222 Pretty good. 1451 01:20:22,901 --> 01:20:24,819 Can I get an "amen" for our choir? 1452 01:20:24,903 --> 01:20:26,237 Amen! 1453 01:20:26,363 --> 01:20:27,780 AII right, well done. 1454 01:20:28,365 --> 01:20:29,741 Well done. 1455 01:20:31,035 --> 01:20:32,035 Praise the Lord. 1456 01:20:32,119 --> 01:20:33,953 Praise the Lord! 1457 01:20:36,248 --> 01:20:40,960 Praise the Lord. I am so happy, so happy to be back in the House of the Lord 1458 01:20:42,463 --> 01:20:44,714 where mercy can be found. 1459 01:20:45,716 --> 01:20:50,178 As most of you know, I have been very sick these past few months. 1460 01:20:50,262 --> 01:20:53,765 But by the grace of God, I've recovered. But I have to tell you something. 1461 01:20:55,142 --> 01:20:59,562 I've given a Iot of prayer and I feel it's time for me to retire. 1462 01:21:01,231 --> 01:21:03,149 Now don't y'all worry, don't worry. 1463 01:21:03,233 --> 01:21:06,486 This church will continue, and its future's guaranteed, 1464 01:21:06,570 --> 01:21:09,405 because the church has been paid off. 1465 01:21:11,658 --> 01:21:16,621 Praise God! 1466 01:21:16,747 --> 01:21:17,997 Oh, no. 1467 01:21:22,002 --> 01:21:26,839 And I was able to pay the church off because of the investments of my son. 1468 01:21:27,758 --> 01:21:28,966 My son. 1469 01:21:29,927 --> 01:21:31,344 I'm so proud of him. 1470 01:21:31,428 --> 01:21:34,305 Son, come on up here and tell them what you've done. 1471 01:21:34,431 --> 01:21:37,934 Let us praise Jesus 'cause we're all precious in His name. 1472 01:21:38,018 --> 01:21:39,435 Precious. 1473 01:21:41,772 --> 01:21:43,106 Precious? 1474 01:21:44,108 --> 01:21:45,441 - To all the congregation here... - Precious. 1475 01:21:46,944 --> 01:21:48,861 ...there's something I need to tell you. 1476 01:21:49,279 --> 01:21:50,696 I did invest the money... 1477 01:21:50,781 --> 01:21:54,826 Precious! 1478 01:21:54,952 --> 01:21:56,369 Somebody's got the Holy Ghost. 1479 01:21:57,454 --> 01:22:01,541 I know! 1480 01:22:02,501 --> 01:22:04,961 - You know? - I know! 1481 01:22:05,045 --> 01:22:07,004 The same know that I know? 1482 01:22:07,131 --> 01:22:08,589 I know! 1483 01:22:08,674 --> 01:22:09,757 That man knows! 1484 01:22:09,842 --> 01:22:11,676 - You know? - I know! 1485 01:22:11,802 --> 01:22:15,012 - How much do you know? - Do you think that he knows now? 1486 01:22:15,139 --> 01:22:16,973 - I'm not hot, I just know. - Praise the Lord! 1487 01:22:17,057 --> 01:22:18,307 Yes! 1488 01:22:18,392 --> 01:22:20,184 AII right, George, you want to try to explain this to me? 1489 01:22:20,310 --> 01:22:21,394 Yeah. 1490 01:22:21,478 --> 01:22:23,563 There was a woman named Precious Jackson 1491 01:22:23,647 --> 01:22:25,565 that Walter always told me about. Okay? 1492 01:22:25,649 --> 01:22:28,526 Now I've Iooked at these accounts and they all start with a Ietter. 1493 01:22:28,652 --> 01:22:31,320 The Ietters spell out "Precious Jackson." 1494 01:22:31,989 --> 01:22:34,240 It's all encrypted, right here. 1495 01:22:34,324 --> 01:22:36,659 What the hell are you talking about? 1496 01:22:37,202 --> 01:22:38,828 The Ietters spell out... 1497 01:22:38,912 --> 01:22:40,454 Okay, I'm a Iittle confused by this, too. 1498 01:22:40,539 --> 01:22:42,832 It's the name the account is in. 1499 01:22:43,375 --> 01:22:44,458 Okay. 1500 01:22:44,543 --> 01:22:47,753 Just follow this, 'cause it took some doing 1501 01:22:47,838 --> 01:22:50,673 to follow the money trail from the Cayman Islands and Germany. 1502 01:22:50,757 --> 01:22:56,220 But the trail goes cold when the money goes into a Swiss account. Okay? 1503 01:22:56,346 --> 01:23:00,183 Now, they were all given a Ietter when they went in and came out. 1504 01:23:00,851 --> 01:23:02,059 - Right? - Okay. 1505 01:23:02,186 --> 01:23:05,938 But every month on this date, 1506 01:23:06,023 --> 01:23:09,400 as the funds go into this Swiss account, 1507 01:23:09,526 --> 01:23:12,486 this account in the US sees a deposit. 1508 01:23:12,571 --> 01:23:16,324 Now I balance the two, and it's exactly 10 % 1509 01:23:16,408 --> 01:23:20,328 that resurfaces in the US in this account every month 1510 01:23:20,412 --> 01:23:23,080 to a Iady named Precious Jackson. 1511 01:23:23,540 --> 01:23:25,458 What is 10 % gonna do? 1512 01:23:25,542 --> 01:23:28,085 Of 600 million? 1513 01:23:28,170 --> 01:23:30,796 That's six million! 1514 01:23:30,881 --> 01:23:32,006 Jake. 1515 01:23:34,843 --> 01:23:36,886 It's 60 million. 1516 01:23:36,970 --> 01:23:38,721 - Sixty. - Sixty. 1517 01:23:38,805 --> 01:23:40,806 George. 1518 01:23:40,891 --> 01:23:42,475 I can get the church's money back. 1519 01:23:42,893 --> 01:23:45,686 - Praise God. - Yes, you and all the charities. 1520 01:23:45,771 --> 01:23:47,855 - Can this really work? - Yes, it can work. 1521 01:23:47,940 --> 01:23:49,315 Why would Walter take this money 1522 01:23:49,399 --> 01:23:52,235 and put it in an account with some woman's name who never touches it? 1523 01:23:52,611 --> 01:23:56,614 Well, either he didn't tell her about it, or she doesn't exist. 1524 01:23:56,698 --> 01:24:00,117 So what I'll do is I'll get a federal warrant, 1525 01:24:00,202 --> 01:24:01,744 we'll get the account seized. 1526 01:24:01,828 --> 01:24:04,789 I'm pretty sure once I bring this to the judge, you'll be able to get probation. 1527 01:24:04,873 --> 01:24:05,915 That's a great job. 1528 01:24:05,999 --> 01:24:09,210 But, Brian, we can get this money back to the people it belongs to. 1529 01:24:09,294 --> 01:24:11,295 It's sitting right here in this account. 1530 01:24:11,380 --> 01:24:13,589 You didn't just say that to me. I'm an officer of the court. 1531 01:24:13,674 --> 01:24:15,675 I don't even know what you're thinking. I didn't hear that. 1532 01:24:15,759 --> 01:24:18,177 I don't even want to know what you're thinking. No. No, no, no. 1533 01:24:18,262 --> 01:24:19,762 - Brian. - Not having this conversation. 1534 01:24:19,846 --> 01:24:21,264 - I'm out of here. - Please. Come on. 1535 01:24:21,348 --> 01:24:22,974 - I will see you at the office tomorrow... - Brian. 1536 01:24:23,058 --> 01:24:24,058 ...bright and early, George. 1537 01:24:24,142 --> 01:24:25,434 - Thank you so much. - Brian. Please. 1538 01:24:25,519 --> 01:24:26,560 Bye. 1539 01:24:28,438 --> 01:24:31,107 I've come too close to give up now, okay? I'm not calling it quits. 1540 01:24:31,191 --> 01:24:33,859 I'm gonna get that money back to the charities. 1541 01:24:34,945 --> 01:24:36,988 Right? I want my Iife back. 1542 01:24:37,781 --> 01:24:40,408 And here is where I start to take action. 1543 01:24:40,492 --> 01:24:44,662 So you're either with me or you're not, but I'm not giving up without a fight. 1544 01:24:44,788 --> 01:24:48,749 So what's it gonna be, Mr. I'm-a-tough-guy-from-the-hood? 1545 01:24:48,834 --> 01:24:51,752 Mr. You-going-down-homie? 1546 01:24:51,837 --> 01:24:55,089 'Cause I'll tell you, I'm gonna do the damn thing. 1547 01:24:55,173 --> 01:24:56,966 So you're with me or what? 1548 01:24:57,968 --> 01:24:59,093 I'm with you. 1549 01:24:59,177 --> 01:25:01,304 - Gucci! - Yeah. 1550 01:25:03,223 --> 01:25:04,307 With you. 1551 01:25:10,147 --> 01:25:11,397 You okay? 1552 01:25:12,482 --> 01:25:13,566 I will be. 1553 01:25:14,026 --> 01:25:16,527 George, what's going on? 1554 01:25:16,653 --> 01:25:19,238 I screwed up, that's what's going on. 1555 01:25:19,323 --> 01:25:21,866 And now there's a big wrong that I have to right. 1556 01:25:21,992 --> 01:25:26,245 And I just have to figure out how I'm gonna do it. 1557 01:25:26,330 --> 01:25:28,664 But I'm gonna do it. I am gonna do it. 1558 01:25:29,666 --> 01:25:32,918 George, I haven't seen this much fire in you since we got married. 1559 01:25:33,170 --> 01:25:35,671 Well, maybe it's Iong overdue, huh? 1560 01:25:37,090 --> 01:25:40,176 Do you remember our honeymoon in Florence? 1561 01:25:41,386 --> 01:25:44,180 - I remember it rained every day. - It did. 1562 01:25:44,598 --> 01:25:46,015 And do you remember, you said, 1563 01:25:46,099 --> 01:25:49,185 "What if our marriage is nothing but full of rainy days?" 1564 01:25:49,269 --> 01:25:51,354 I might have been joking. 1565 01:25:51,897 --> 01:25:54,273 But I remember you still got upset, didn't you? 1566 01:25:54,358 --> 01:25:55,941 - I did. - Yeah. 1567 01:25:56,026 --> 01:25:57,234 And what did you say? 1568 01:25:57,944 --> 01:25:59,862 I said, 1569 01:25:59,946 --> 01:26:03,240 "Rain does make things grow." 1570 01:26:03,367 --> 01:26:05,117 Exactly. 1571 01:26:05,202 --> 01:26:08,329 What if all this happened for a reason? 1572 01:26:08,413 --> 01:26:10,373 For you and I to get to know each other again, 1573 01:26:10,457 --> 01:26:13,793 for our family to get closer, for us to grow? 1574 01:26:15,212 --> 01:26:16,796 What if it did? 1575 01:26:17,881 --> 01:26:20,633 Kate, you are amazing. 1576 01:26:21,885 --> 01:26:24,136 I swear to you, I'm gonna make things right. 1577 01:26:24,221 --> 01:26:26,847 I have no doubt. 1578 01:26:26,932 --> 01:26:29,016 Honey, you always do the right thing. 1579 01:26:29,101 --> 01:26:30,726 I Iove you so much. 1580 01:26:30,811 --> 01:26:32,561 I Iove you, too. 1581 01:26:34,231 --> 01:26:36,107 I'm so proud of you, George. 1582 01:26:38,151 --> 01:26:39,443 That's good. 1583 01:26:39,569 --> 01:26:41,070 I'm closing an account. 1584 01:26:41,321 --> 01:26:46,075 Rita, it looks like you'll be withdrawing $4 million from us today. 1585 01:26:46,159 --> 01:26:47,243 $4 million? 1586 01:26:47,327 --> 01:26:49,286 - Is that correct? - Yes. 1587 01:26:49,830 --> 01:26:51,664 Well, how would you like that? 1588 01:26:52,416 --> 01:26:53,499 10s and 20s? 1589 01:26:53,917 --> 01:26:56,627 Hey, son. We watching Ghost. 1590 01:26:56,711 --> 01:26:59,255 She's gonna walk up in a bank and act Iike she somebody else. 1591 01:26:59,339 --> 01:27:00,548 Look at that. 1592 01:27:00,632 --> 01:27:03,342 You know we require identification and all that. 1593 01:27:03,427 --> 01:27:06,804 Rita Miller or Oda Mae Jones, she don't even know what her name is. 1594 01:27:07,931 --> 01:27:10,808 Rita Miller. That's my name. 1595 01:27:11,268 --> 01:27:13,018 My name. Rita Miller. 1596 01:27:15,397 --> 01:27:16,897 My name. 1597 01:27:18,066 --> 01:27:19,692 The check. 1598 01:27:21,361 --> 01:27:22,403 Here you are. 1599 01:27:25,115 --> 01:27:27,992 What the hell you Iooking at me Iike the Iast virgin for? 1600 01:27:32,831 --> 01:27:34,832 Now Iet me make sure I got this right. 1601 01:27:34,916 --> 01:27:37,334 Y'all want me to get on the aeroplane, 1602 01:27:37,419 --> 01:27:40,796 go out to New York City and go in a bank and pretend to be Precious Jackson? 1603 01:27:42,090 --> 01:27:43,340 Is that right? 1604 01:27:43,425 --> 01:27:44,508 Yes. 1605 01:27:47,637 --> 01:27:49,513 Does Brian know anything about this? 1606 01:27:49,598 --> 01:27:52,099 - No. - He thinks you both could go to jail. 1607 01:27:52,184 --> 01:27:54,268 Well, I could be going to jail anyway. 1608 01:27:54,352 --> 01:27:56,645 That's all right. Just don't drop the soap, you'll be fine. 1609 01:27:56,730 --> 01:27:59,440 I been up in there. You might have to fight a Iittle bit, kick a Iittle ass. 1610 01:27:59,524 --> 01:28:00,608 But you'll be all right. 1611 01:28:00,692 --> 01:28:02,693 If you don't kick no ass, they gonna take your ass. 1612 01:28:02,777 --> 01:28:04,153 But you'll be all right. 1613 01:28:05,238 --> 01:28:07,114 I don't know about this, though. I don't feel good about this. 1614 01:28:07,199 --> 01:28:08,908 I just don't... I don't know. I don't know. 1615 01:28:08,992 --> 01:28:11,076 Madea, it's easy. 1616 01:28:11,161 --> 01:28:13,829 It's just as easy as it was in the movie. 1617 01:28:14,664 --> 01:28:16,499 Whoopi Goldberg had a dead white man helping her 1618 01:28:16,583 --> 01:28:18,125 all through that whole movie. 1619 01:28:18,210 --> 01:28:19,460 I'll help you. 1620 01:28:19,544 --> 01:28:21,670 You alive. I said dead! 1621 01:28:21,755 --> 01:28:23,047 George, you cannot go to New York. 1622 01:28:23,131 --> 01:28:24,215 Honey, I have to. 1623 01:28:24,299 --> 01:28:26,425 You can't. They're still after you. Are you crazy? 1624 01:28:26,510 --> 01:28:28,302 I'll disguise myself somehow. 1625 01:28:28,386 --> 01:28:30,346 They won't know me. Okay? It'll be fine. 1626 01:28:30,430 --> 01:28:32,139 - No, I can't do that. - Madea. 1627 01:28:32,224 --> 01:28:34,266 Please, I know you can do it. 1628 01:28:34,351 --> 01:28:36,393 You say this is for charity? 1629 01:28:36,520 --> 01:28:38,896 And for the church? Right, Jake? For the church? It's for the church? 1630 01:28:39,022 --> 01:28:41,524 It's for the church, for your daddy get the money back for the church? 1631 01:28:41,608 --> 01:28:44,568 AII right. Now my question then becomes, 1632 01:28:44,694 --> 01:28:47,655 all these beautiful people that got these charities 1633 01:28:47,739 --> 01:28:50,699 and helping all these children and feeding the people around the world, 1634 01:28:50,784 --> 01:28:53,911 it's for that, that's wonderful, but I have a question for you. 1635 01:28:55,872 --> 01:28:57,957 What the hell in it for me? 1636 01:28:58,750 --> 01:29:02,044 Madea, you'll feel a Iot better about yourself. 1637 01:29:02,879 --> 01:29:06,382 I always feel good about myself. Hell, I was born 6'2". 1638 01:29:06,883 --> 01:29:08,425 237 pounds. 1639 01:29:08,552 --> 01:29:12,137 I have always been this big all my Iife. I went to kindergarten this big. 1640 01:29:12,305 --> 01:29:14,598 I had to have high self-esteem. I feel good about myself. 1641 01:29:14,724 --> 01:29:16,934 Ain't nothing you gonna tell me gonna make me feel good about myself. 1642 01:29:17,060 --> 01:29:18,978 You give me some money, that'll make me feel good about myself. 1643 01:29:20,063 --> 01:29:21,355 Okay, you know what? 1644 01:29:21,439 --> 01:29:24,400 Can we figure that out after this is done? 1645 01:29:25,235 --> 01:29:27,403 George, have you ever hired a ho? 1646 01:29:30,282 --> 01:29:32,241 No. No. 1647 01:29:33,326 --> 01:29:35,369 She want her money first. Do you understand? 1648 01:29:35,453 --> 01:29:36,787 I need to get some money first. 1649 01:29:36,913 --> 01:29:40,124 Don't perform no services until the money's on the table. 1650 01:29:42,752 --> 01:29:45,838 You know what? I'll do it. I will do it. 1651 01:29:45,922 --> 01:29:47,381 AII I got to do is go in there 1652 01:29:47,465 --> 01:29:49,592 and give them a bunch of accounts to transfer the money to? 1653 01:29:49,676 --> 01:29:50,926 - Yes. - 12 accounts? 1654 01:29:51,011 --> 01:29:52,386 I just give them the information to do the transfer? 1655 01:29:52,470 --> 01:29:53,721 That's it. That's all. 1656 01:29:53,805 --> 01:29:54,888 AII right, I'll do it. 1657 01:29:54,973 --> 01:29:58,267 Then I will gladly do it. So he just gonna wire the money to the accounts? 1658 01:29:58,351 --> 01:30:00,644 - Yes. - Okay, fine. 1659 01:30:00,770 --> 01:30:02,938 Come on, Iet's go. Where's my purse? Y'all get my purse. 1660 01:30:03,023 --> 01:30:05,149 Joe, where's my purse? We've got to go up to New York. 1661 01:30:05,275 --> 01:30:07,234 You know what? If you guys are gonna go, 1662 01:30:07,319 --> 01:30:09,403 she can't Iook Iike this, she can't be wearing that. 1663 01:30:09,487 --> 01:30:10,946 - Right. - What's wrong with what I got on? 1664 01:30:12,282 --> 01:30:15,576 This came from Aretha Franklin. Aretha gave me this. 1665 01:30:15,660 --> 01:30:17,328 And y'all know Aretha can dress. 1666 01:30:17,454 --> 01:30:20,039 You've seen Aretha, she makes fashion statements. 1667 01:30:20,123 --> 01:30:22,625 How about Barbara, Cindy and I give you a makeover? 1668 01:30:25,629 --> 01:30:27,838 Introducing Precious Jackson. 1669 01:30:47,984 --> 01:30:49,151 Wow. 1670 01:30:51,196 --> 01:30:52,321 This might work. 1671 01:30:52,656 --> 01:30:55,949 No. I don't know what the hell y'all are thinking. 1672 01:30:56,034 --> 01:30:58,661 You Iook Iike a big ass bottle of Pepto-Bismol. 1673 01:31:16,221 --> 01:31:18,681 - Can I give you a hand, sir? - Yes. The Iuggage. 1674 01:31:18,765 --> 01:31:20,182 The airport. 1675 01:31:20,266 --> 01:31:22,393 This bag. This way. 1676 01:31:22,519 --> 01:31:24,019 - Here we go? - Yeah. 1677 01:31:24,104 --> 01:31:25,354 Okay. 1678 01:31:26,356 --> 01:31:27,523 Going to the airport. 1679 01:31:27,607 --> 01:31:29,441 - Right this way, ma'am. - AII right, I'll follow you. 1680 01:31:29,526 --> 01:31:32,027 You ain't got to rush me, I know where the hell I'm going. 1681 01:31:33,571 --> 01:31:35,197 The airport. A Iot of people here. 1682 01:31:35,699 --> 01:31:37,116 I'm nervous. I need to relax. 1683 01:31:37,200 --> 01:31:38,659 Well, there's nothing to be nervous about. 1684 01:31:38,743 --> 01:31:42,121 It's just Iike riding in a car, except you're 30,000 feet higher. 1685 01:31:42,205 --> 01:31:44,832 Cars don't crash from 30,000 feet, George. 1686 01:31:44,916 --> 01:31:48,335 You need something to calm your nerves, I got that old wee-wee. 1687 01:31:48,420 --> 01:31:50,045 Hey, what does that mean, drugs? 1688 01:31:50,130 --> 01:31:51,380 - Is that drugs? - I know you ain't got no drugs. 1689 01:31:51,464 --> 01:31:52,548 - No drugs. - If you got... 1690 01:31:52,632 --> 01:31:53,966 I'm gonna beat your ass if you got them drugs. 1691 01:31:54,050 --> 01:31:55,134 You don't bring no drugs up in here. 1692 01:31:55,218 --> 01:31:57,052 - They got sniffing dogs up in here. - No drugs. 1693 01:31:57,137 --> 01:31:59,638 Y'all go through. I'm not going through with y'all. 1694 01:31:59,723 --> 01:32:01,974 I'm not going through. Excuse me, y'all. Excuse me. 1695 01:32:02,058 --> 01:32:04,643 - I'm not going through with them at all. - Madame, you are making a scene. 1696 01:32:04,728 --> 01:32:07,312 - Watch yourself. Watch yourself, here. - That's a no, no. 1697 01:32:07,897 --> 01:32:11,900 Y'all go on. I don't know them. I don't know them. 1698 01:32:12,402 --> 01:32:14,403 Hi. Hi. A Iittle scary. 1699 01:32:14,738 --> 01:32:17,072 When I'm finished doing, this gonna be the bomb. 1700 01:32:17,407 --> 01:32:19,908 - Don't say "bomb." Don't say "bomb." - What is the bomb? 1701 01:32:19,993 --> 01:32:22,244 - No, no, no. - Don't say... 1702 01:32:22,328 --> 01:32:24,163 Hey, he don't want me saying "bomb." 1703 01:32:24,247 --> 01:32:25,414 Okay. 1704 01:32:27,459 --> 01:32:30,043 What do I do, just give him the ticket? 1705 01:32:30,128 --> 01:32:31,670 And show him my ID? 1706 01:32:31,755 --> 01:32:33,881 - Okay. - That's the way. 1707 01:32:33,965 --> 01:32:35,966 Okay, that's me, and that's my ticket. 1708 01:32:36,092 --> 01:32:38,719 - That is the way. - Okay, thank you so much. 1709 01:32:38,803 --> 01:32:40,637 AII right. 1710 01:32:40,764 --> 01:32:43,015 Now what y'all doing? 1711 01:32:43,099 --> 01:32:45,392 - What y'all doing? - Taking off our shoes. 1712 01:32:45,477 --> 01:32:48,395 Take off your personal items and put them in the tray. 1713 01:32:48,480 --> 01:32:51,064 What they gonna do with my personal items? 1714 01:32:51,149 --> 01:32:52,316 Baby, I can't take off my shoe. 1715 01:32:52,442 --> 01:32:54,651 Do you know how hard it is for a woman my size to take off her shoes? 1716 01:32:54,778 --> 01:32:56,111 I'm supposed to take off my shoes? 1717 01:32:56,237 --> 01:32:57,404 Yes, ma'am. 1718 01:32:58,114 --> 01:33:00,908 What the hell do I need to be taking my shoes off for? 1719 01:33:02,118 --> 01:33:04,369 Baby, when you're this big, it's hard to take your shoes off. 1720 01:33:04,454 --> 01:33:05,454 That's all I'm saying. 1721 01:33:05,580 --> 01:33:08,582 Take them off, but I don't know who the hell gonna help me put them back on. 1722 01:33:08,666 --> 01:33:10,793 Y'all so serious. 1723 01:33:15,173 --> 01:33:16,799 Watch that now. 1724 01:33:21,012 --> 01:33:22,095 There you go. 1725 01:33:22,597 --> 01:33:24,807 Oh, Lord. And you just push it through there? 1726 01:33:25,141 --> 01:33:27,267 - Now what I do? What I do? - Right this way. 1727 01:33:27,352 --> 01:33:28,560 Right this way. 1728 01:33:28,645 --> 01:33:31,104 Okay. I'm gonna come on through this thing. 1729 01:33:33,942 --> 01:33:36,151 - What the hell is that? - Just step over here, please, ma'am. 1730 01:33:36,277 --> 01:33:37,444 What was that? 1731 01:33:37,529 --> 01:33:38,862 Just step over here through the scanner. 1732 01:33:39,948 --> 01:33:41,365 - What'd you want me to do? - Step through here, please. 1733 01:33:41,491 --> 01:33:44,159 - Okay, all right. - Right through the scanner. 1734 01:33:44,285 --> 01:33:46,370 Now what am I supposed to do? This ain't gonna drop me down? 1735 01:33:46,496 --> 01:33:48,539 Just go and put your feet in the footsteps, please. 1736 01:33:49,123 --> 01:33:52,167 That's really wide. You want me to put both my feet where these yellow feet? 1737 01:33:52,293 --> 01:33:53,502 - Yes, ma'am. - That's really wide. 1738 01:33:53,628 --> 01:33:56,004 My Iegs ain't been open that wide since I had my daughter. 1739 01:33:57,674 --> 01:34:00,300 George, they want me to spread my Iegs. 1740 01:34:00,552 --> 01:34:01,927 Okay, fine. 1741 01:34:02,011 --> 01:34:04,221 - Now what? - Put your hands over your head, please. 1742 01:34:04,347 --> 01:34:05,472 - Like this? - That's it. 1743 01:34:05,557 --> 01:34:08,016 Hands over your head. 1744 01:34:08,142 --> 01:34:10,435 Wow, this is really sexual. 1745 01:34:10,520 --> 01:34:13,105 Reminds me back of my stripping days. 1746 01:34:13,189 --> 01:34:15,524 They used to call me Magnitude. 1747 01:34:17,151 --> 01:34:18,694 You see anything? 1748 01:34:20,530 --> 01:34:22,030 Can I have you step outside, please? 1749 01:34:22,156 --> 01:34:23,490 Step outside. 1750 01:34:23,575 --> 01:34:24,658 Right this way. Put your hands down. 1751 01:34:24,742 --> 01:34:26,493 - Can I close my Iegs? - Yes, please. 1752 01:34:26,578 --> 01:34:28,537 Okay, thank you so much. 1753 01:34:29,247 --> 01:34:30,956 - Now what? - Stand right over here, please. 1754 01:34:31,040 --> 01:34:33,125 - Yes. - I'm just gonna do a quick pat down. 1755 01:34:33,209 --> 01:34:34,918 - On my body? - Yes. 1756 01:34:35,044 --> 01:34:36,670 - Go ahead and raise your hands. - Am I under arrest? 1757 01:34:36,754 --> 01:34:38,171 - No, ma'am. - Why you patting me down? 1758 01:34:38,256 --> 01:34:40,132 - Just standard procedure. - A standard... 1759 01:34:40,216 --> 01:34:42,301 - I got to do all this to get on the airplane? - Yes, please. 1760 01:34:42,385 --> 01:34:44,553 George, I got to do all this to get on the airplane? 1761 01:34:44,679 --> 01:34:47,681 Ma'am, it's just standard procedure. I need you to put your hands up, please. 1762 01:34:47,765 --> 01:34:50,350 - Thank you. - Go on, pat me down. 1763 01:34:50,435 --> 01:34:51,560 Now, wait a minute. 1764 01:34:52,061 --> 01:34:54,813 You gonna find a roadmap to heaven. You better come on from up there now. 1765 01:34:54,898 --> 01:34:56,273 Come on up. 1766 01:34:57,275 --> 01:34:58,567 Turn around. 1767 01:34:58,693 --> 01:34:59,902 Can I put my hands down? 1768 01:35:00,028 --> 01:35:02,696 Now wait. Now what the hell you doing? 1769 01:35:03,072 --> 01:35:04,406 Boy. 1770 01:35:05,408 --> 01:35:07,701 Something back here that you wanna tell me about? 1771 01:35:07,785 --> 01:35:11,371 Yes, that's my ass. It's from wall-to-wall in this skirt. 1772 01:35:12,749 --> 01:35:15,542 We're clear. Go right ahead. 1773 01:35:15,627 --> 01:35:19,338 You need to buy me a cigarette or a drink or something after doing all that to me. 1774 01:35:19,422 --> 01:35:20,464 You don't know me. 1775 01:35:20,590 --> 01:35:22,174 I ain't felt that many hands all over my body 1776 01:35:22,258 --> 01:35:23,634 since I got off that train from Mexico. 1777 01:35:23,760 --> 01:35:25,260 Where's my purse and my shoes? 1778 01:35:31,434 --> 01:35:33,852 Anybody ever told you you Iook Iike Beyoncé? 1779 01:35:33,937 --> 01:35:34,937 No. 1780 01:35:35,063 --> 01:35:37,439 Madea, I found my wifey. 1781 01:35:40,068 --> 01:35:41,526 Shut the hell up back there. You in coach. 1782 01:35:41,611 --> 01:35:43,612 You ain't supposed to talk to nobody in first class. 1783 01:35:43,738 --> 01:35:46,198 Didn't you see Titanic? 1784 01:35:46,282 --> 01:35:47,658 I'm nervous. 1785 01:35:47,784 --> 01:35:49,618 I know. But behave. 1786 01:35:51,245 --> 01:35:52,496 What the hell was that? What was that? 1787 01:35:53,790 --> 01:35:55,958 There better not be no terrorer on this plane. Is there a terrorer? 1788 01:35:56,292 --> 01:35:59,127 Is there terrorer on here? Better not be no terrorer. 1789 01:35:59,796 --> 01:36:01,797 Madea, it's a bump. Bump, bump. 1790 01:36:01,923 --> 01:36:03,715 What the hell a bump doing in the air? Bumps are on the road. 1791 01:36:03,800 --> 01:36:05,717 - That's all. - Bumps ain't in the air. Hell. 1792 01:36:05,802 --> 01:36:08,303 This thing just makes me nervous. I don't Iike being on this thing. 1793 01:36:08,429 --> 01:36:12,224 I got to pee. I need something to relax me. Calm me down. 1794 01:36:12,308 --> 01:36:13,600 What do you want? What do you want? 1795 01:36:13,685 --> 01:36:16,144 I want a joint. 1796 01:36:16,270 --> 01:36:19,523 - You need that good-good, Madea? - Boy, shut up. 1797 01:36:19,649 --> 01:36:21,650 Just get me a drink. Can I get a drink? 1798 01:36:21,776 --> 01:36:24,027 Can they get a Iady a drink? Can a colored woman get a drink? 1799 01:36:24,153 --> 01:36:25,487 I'll get a flight attendant. 1800 01:36:25,613 --> 01:36:28,281 I'll get her. Flight attendant? 1801 01:36:28,366 --> 01:36:32,160 Flight attendant? Flight attendant? Flight attendant? 1802 01:36:32,286 --> 01:36:34,121 Ma'am, are you okay? 1803 01:36:34,205 --> 01:36:37,332 You're making the other passengers just a Iittle bit nervous, okay? 1804 01:36:37,458 --> 01:36:38,542 I would Iike something to drink, please. 1805 01:36:38,668 --> 01:36:40,502 'Cause I need something to relax me just a Iittle bit. 1806 01:36:40,628 --> 01:36:41,670 Okay. What would you Iike? 1807 01:36:41,796 --> 01:36:43,213 That depends. How much is it? 1808 01:36:43,339 --> 01:36:44,756 You're in first class, it's free. 1809 01:36:44,841 --> 01:36:46,758 Okay. Well, bring me every damn thing you got back there. 1810 01:36:46,843 --> 01:36:47,884 If it's brown, pour it. 1811 01:37:07,822 --> 01:37:11,366 Lord have mercy, I ain't never seen no place Iike this before. 1812 01:37:12,076 --> 01:37:14,578 They call it the Big Apple, huh? 1813 01:37:15,038 --> 01:37:18,331 I wonder why they call it the Big Apple. I don't see no apples. 1814 01:37:18,416 --> 01:37:20,500 - Do you see the apples anywhere? - No. 1815 01:37:24,005 --> 01:37:27,174 I wanna see that thing, too, that thing with the torch on it. 1816 01:37:27,258 --> 01:37:30,302 The statue. The Statue of Limitations. 1817 01:37:31,179 --> 01:37:32,471 Lord, Iook at all these people. 1818 01:37:32,555 --> 01:37:34,389 I ain't never seen this many people in one place 1819 01:37:34,474 --> 01:37:36,016 unless they be giving away government cheese. 1820 01:37:36,100 --> 01:37:39,603 I don't understand why folk would be all on top of each other Iike this. 1821 01:37:39,937 --> 01:37:42,105 This is too much. I got to get back to Georgia. 1822 01:37:42,190 --> 01:37:43,982 Come on, Iet's go get this business done. 1823 01:37:52,450 --> 01:37:55,077 New York! 1824 01:37:55,161 --> 01:37:56,995 Yes indeed, y'all. This is nice. 1825 01:37:57,080 --> 01:37:59,206 - Yeah, I'm in New York, baby. - How you doing? 1826 01:37:59,290 --> 01:38:01,083 Hello, madame. May I take your bags? 1827 01:38:01,167 --> 01:38:03,251 - Where you gonna take it? - I'll take it to your room, if you Iike. 1828 01:38:03,336 --> 01:38:06,922 - No. No. No, no. - She is world-traveled. 1829 01:38:07,006 --> 01:38:10,592 She never think about the Iuggage. 1830 01:38:10,676 --> 01:38:11,843 I don't think about no Iuggage. 1831 01:38:11,928 --> 01:38:15,180 I don't think about no Iuggage or the garbage or none of that stuff. 1832 01:38:15,264 --> 01:38:16,515 - This way. - Okay. 1833 01:38:16,599 --> 01:38:19,017 Well, get on out of the way there. Let a Iady pass. 1834 01:38:19,102 --> 01:38:22,354 You in the way, George, move. Let them open the door for me. 1835 01:38:26,067 --> 01:38:28,235 Thank you. Thank you so much. 1836 01:38:28,903 --> 01:38:32,531 This place is Iovely. Hello. Welcome. Thank you. Welcome. 1837 01:38:32,615 --> 01:38:34,950 Welcome to me. My first time here. 1838 01:38:35,034 --> 01:38:36,868 Hello. Hello. 1839 01:38:36,953 --> 01:38:40,997 They take dogs. Well, Oprah Winfrey must stay here. Is she here? 1840 01:38:41,082 --> 01:38:42,582 This is Iovely. 1841 01:38:42,667 --> 01:38:45,377 Run into me one more time, and I'm gonna knock the hell out of you. 1842 01:38:45,461 --> 01:38:47,963 What the hell's wrong with you? 1843 01:38:48,047 --> 01:38:49,798 Good afternoon, sir. 1844 01:38:49,882 --> 01:38:52,801 A reservation for Jackson. 1845 01:38:52,885 --> 01:38:55,637 - Of course. Good afternoon, madam. - Hello. 1846 01:38:55,721 --> 01:38:57,055 I have the reservation. 1847 01:38:57,140 --> 01:38:59,766 I have your credit card information on file. 1848 01:38:59,851 --> 01:39:01,643 And here are your keys. 1849 01:39:02,687 --> 01:39:06,565 And if you would be so kind as to sign here at the bottom of this form. 1850 01:39:06,649 --> 01:39:08,191 But of course. 1851 01:39:08,276 --> 01:39:10,277 - But of course. - Lovely accent. 1852 01:39:10,361 --> 01:39:12,112 - Yes. - Yes. 1853 01:39:12,196 --> 01:39:14,656 Yes. The reservation is under Precious Jackson. 1854 01:39:14,740 --> 01:39:17,409 That is my name. I'm one of the Jackson family. 1855 01:39:17,493 --> 01:39:19,995 - Well, really? That's wonderful, madam. - Yes, yes. 1856 01:39:20,079 --> 01:39:21,413 Yes. Excellent. 1857 01:39:21,497 --> 01:39:25,167 Well, it was La Toya and Rebbie and me. Yeah. 1858 01:39:25,251 --> 01:39:26,918 - And Janet. Little Janet. - Wonderful. 1859 01:39:27,003 --> 01:39:29,838 - We are so proud to have you here, madam. - Thank you so much. 1860 01:39:29,922 --> 01:39:32,090 Excuse me. Excuse me. 1861 01:39:32,175 --> 01:39:34,342 Back the hell up. Thank you. 1862 01:39:34,427 --> 01:39:39,181 If I have a phone call from Janet or La Toya or Rebbie Jackson... 1863 01:39:39,265 --> 01:39:40,974 - Yes, madam? - ...please put them through. 1864 01:39:41,058 --> 01:39:43,393 - They're always calling me, all the time. - I see. 1865 01:39:43,477 --> 01:39:45,395 'Cause they need makeup tips and advice. 1866 01:39:45,479 --> 01:39:47,105 - I'll put them right through to your room. - Yes, thanks. 1867 01:39:47,190 --> 01:39:48,899 - I will do that, madam. Yes. - Thank you so much. Thank you. 1868 01:39:48,983 --> 01:39:52,110 - Shall we go? - The elevators are to your Ieft. 1869 01:39:52,195 --> 01:39:54,070 And I do hope you enjoy your stay. 1870 01:39:54,155 --> 01:39:55,864 - Well, yes, we will. Thank you so much. - Yes, wonderful. 1871 01:39:55,948 --> 01:39:57,782 - Thank you so much. - Don't fall over. 1872 01:39:59,327 --> 01:40:01,995 You hit me with these bags one more time, I will knock the hell out of you. 1873 01:40:02,079 --> 01:40:03,997 - What's in here? - Get the hell on the elevator. 1874 01:40:04,081 --> 01:40:05,498 You got two midgets in here. 1875 01:40:08,836 --> 01:40:12,088 If Randy or Jermaine or Tito call, 1876 01:40:12,173 --> 01:40:16,092 tell them I just cannot talk right now, I'm gonna have to call them Iater. 1877 01:40:16,177 --> 01:40:17,344 Very good, madam. I have that. 1878 01:40:17,428 --> 01:40:18,970 What the hell you pulling me for, George? 1879 01:40:23,851 --> 01:40:25,936 I know how to open the door, here. This... 1880 01:40:26,479 --> 01:40:28,146 This is nice. 1881 01:40:29,440 --> 01:40:32,067 Oh, Lord, this furniture nice. 1882 01:40:32,151 --> 01:40:34,277 Ain't got no plastic on it. Can't be too nice, though. 1883 01:40:34,612 --> 01:40:36,029 - How you doing? - Good. 1884 01:40:36,113 --> 01:40:38,490 - Wonderful. Hello. - Hello. 1885 01:40:39,158 --> 01:40:40,909 Your chocolate. 1886 01:40:40,993 --> 01:40:42,994 Yes, I know I'm chocolate. 1887 01:40:43,704 --> 01:40:47,832 That's a new way of saying "black"? I'm chocolate, yes. African-American. 1888 01:40:48,334 --> 01:40:53,338 Forgive madame. She is, how you say, preoccupée. 1889 01:40:53,798 --> 01:40:57,050 You gonna stop calling me madame. My name is Madea, not madame. 1890 01:40:57,551 --> 01:40:58,885 Zip it. 1891 01:40:59,762 --> 01:41:02,514 - For you, monsieur. Thank you. - Thank you. Thank you. 1892 01:41:04,058 --> 01:41:05,308 What the hell was he just standing up here for, 1893 01:41:05,393 --> 01:41:07,018 just Iooking all scary and weird? 1894 01:41:07,103 --> 01:41:08,353 I thought I had checked into the Bates Motel. 1895 01:41:08,437 --> 01:41:09,437 He's standing there Iike that. 1896 01:41:09,772 --> 01:41:12,148 - What was he waiting for? - A gratuity. 1897 01:41:12,858 --> 01:41:15,026 - What is that? - A tip. 1898 01:41:15,111 --> 01:41:17,195 Why didn't you just say "tip"? I know what the hell a tip is. 1899 01:41:17,280 --> 01:41:20,407 Now, George, how much did you just give that man? You gave him paper money. 1900 01:41:20,491 --> 01:41:22,409 - How much was that? - Twenty. 1901 01:41:23,577 --> 01:41:24,953 Twenty what? 1902 01:41:25,037 --> 01:41:26,579 Dollars. $20. 1903 01:41:27,623 --> 01:41:29,374 Have you Iost your mind, George? 1904 01:41:29,458 --> 01:41:31,918 Waiter! Excuse me. Excuse me, sir. 1905 01:41:32,003 --> 01:41:35,755 Hello, mister. Can I talk to you forjust a second? 1906 01:41:35,840 --> 01:41:38,091 Mister? I'm tired as hell. 1907 01:41:38,175 --> 01:41:41,177 Here. Hold this for me, baby, and Iet me hold that. That's $20. 1908 01:41:41,262 --> 01:41:44,431 Baby, Iisten, if we wanted that for chocolate, we'd go get us a Snickers. 1909 01:41:44,515 --> 01:41:45,557 Here's your tip. 1910 01:41:45,641 --> 01:41:47,559 Pardon, monsieur, she is... 1911 01:41:49,395 --> 01:41:52,647 - Movez-vous. Movez-vous. - Go on. Go on. $20? 1912 01:41:52,732 --> 01:41:56,318 Would you get a grip? You've got to play the part. 1913 01:41:56,402 --> 01:41:58,653 Trust me. Appearance is everything. Okay? 1914 01:41:58,738 --> 01:41:59,946 Now, we need to get some rest 1915 01:42:00,031 --> 01:42:03,033 so we can get to the bank early and get out of here. 1916 01:42:03,117 --> 01:42:04,784 That's fine. Let's get some rest, then, George. 1917 01:42:04,869 --> 01:42:07,287 But you ain't gonna give no $20 to nobody. That's just damn crazy. 1918 01:42:07,371 --> 01:42:09,664 Child, if Joe could see me now. 1919 01:42:11,959 --> 01:42:13,960 This mattress is nice. 1920 01:42:15,129 --> 01:42:17,547 No, can't Iay down flat Iike that. 1921 01:42:18,799 --> 01:42:22,177 Yeah. Women who is well-endowed can't Iay flat. 1922 01:42:23,262 --> 01:42:24,929 'Cause them breasts will sneak up around your neck 1923 01:42:25,014 --> 01:42:27,307 and choke the hell out of you through the night. 1924 01:42:27,391 --> 01:42:29,976 Got to throw them over to the side. 1925 01:42:31,145 --> 01:42:32,604 This is nice. 1926 01:42:34,315 --> 01:42:36,274 Silk. 1927 01:42:39,278 --> 01:42:41,071 Okay, here we go. Here we go. 1928 01:42:41,155 --> 01:42:42,822 Now remember, you're Precious Jackson, 1929 01:42:42,907 --> 01:42:45,867 and you wanna get all the money transferred into the 12 accounts. 1930 01:42:45,951 --> 01:42:47,452 You can't keep running this over and over again. 1931 01:42:47,536 --> 01:42:49,913 - You're gonna make me forget everything. - Okay. This is it. This is it. 1932 01:42:49,997 --> 01:42:51,664 I understand. You gonna make me forget everything. 1933 01:42:51,749 --> 01:42:53,124 I can't keep doing this over and over again. 1934 01:42:53,209 --> 01:42:55,210 - Just relax. - AII right, I got it. 1935 01:42:55,294 --> 01:42:59,339 I'm relaxed, George, I'm relaxed. But you tensing me the hell up. 1936 01:42:59,423 --> 01:43:01,424 - Okay. Okay. - Okay. 1937 01:43:01,509 --> 01:43:03,635 - Got it? - I got it. I got it. 1938 01:43:08,974 --> 01:43:10,016 Madea. 1939 01:43:11,894 --> 01:43:12,894 Yes? 1940 01:43:13,854 --> 01:43:19,317 Remember, the man you're meeting, his name is Jack Goldenberg. 1941 01:43:20,444 --> 01:43:22,695 What the hell you speaking a French accent for, George? 1942 01:43:22,780 --> 01:43:23,905 This is me and you talking. 1943 01:43:23,989 --> 01:43:25,448 Hell, I know how to speak French, too. 1944 01:43:27,618 --> 01:43:28,701 Shut the hell up. 1945 01:43:28,786 --> 01:43:32,539 I got it. Jack Goldenberg. 1946 01:43:32,623 --> 01:43:34,290 - Thank you. - Okay. 1947 01:43:36,585 --> 01:43:39,045 Excuse me while I do my Tyra Banks. 1948 01:43:53,978 --> 01:43:55,186 Hello. 1949 01:43:57,523 --> 01:44:01,192 Can you help me? I'm here to see Whoopi Goldberg. 1950 01:44:02,361 --> 01:44:03,695 Excuse me? 1951 01:44:05,948 --> 01:44:09,367 Silly me. I'm sorry. I was just watching The View. 1952 01:44:09,452 --> 01:44:15,248 I'm here to see Jack Goldenberg. Jack Goldenberg. 1953 01:44:15,332 --> 01:44:17,625 - May I tell him who's here? - Yes... 1954 01:44:18,794 --> 01:44:21,671 I'm sorry, I was about to say, "What a mighty God we serve." 1955 01:44:23,299 --> 01:44:27,051 Precious Jackson is my name. I'm a part of the Jackson family. 1956 01:44:27,136 --> 01:44:29,554 Yes. But, you know, they put me on the outskirts. 1957 01:44:29,638 --> 01:44:32,182 - So now, it's just me and Bubbles. - Bubbles. 1958 01:44:32,308 --> 01:44:33,558 - Yeah, yeah. - That the monkey? 1959 01:44:33,642 --> 01:44:35,101 - Yeah, great Iittle monkey. - Oh, my God. 1960 01:44:35,186 --> 01:44:38,980 Yeah. I call him Joe, but everybody else calls him Bubbles. 1961 01:44:40,316 --> 01:44:41,691 You certainly do have an appointment. 1962 01:44:42,735 --> 01:44:45,153 Precious Jackson to see you. 1963 01:44:45,237 --> 01:44:48,072 Hello. Hi. Thank you so much, Magdalene. 1964 01:44:48,157 --> 01:44:49,741 - It's so great to see you. - How can I help you? 1965 01:44:49,825 --> 01:44:53,453 Jack, I called you. 1966 01:44:53,537 --> 01:44:57,040 We spoke about all the transfers that I need to do. 1967 01:44:57,166 --> 01:45:01,169 I got that request Iast evening. Let me see. 1968 01:45:01,253 --> 01:45:04,631 Jack, can we do this? I'd Iike to add one more account to that. 1969 01:45:04,715 --> 01:45:07,717 Because I'm feeling so generous and I've given to so many charities. 1970 01:45:07,843 --> 01:45:11,054 Here is the account number. I know that's 12, this'll be the 13th. 1971 01:45:11,347 --> 01:45:13,264 - Thirteenth? - Yes. 1972 01:45:13,349 --> 01:45:16,935 And, of course, in this economic climate, you're gonna need my identification. 1973 01:45:17,019 --> 01:45:18,478 Precious Jackson. Here you are. 1974 01:45:18,562 --> 01:45:20,188 - Well, thank you. - Okay. 1975 01:45:22,024 --> 01:45:23,483 She's been in there way too Iong. 1976 01:45:23,567 --> 01:45:25,568 She's not. She hasn't been, and she's doing a mission. 1977 01:45:25,694 --> 01:45:27,654 Very dangerous work she's doing. 1978 01:45:27,738 --> 01:45:30,073 You're just... You know what? You're such a... 1979 01:45:30,199 --> 01:45:32,909 I'd hate to be cliff-diving with you. 1980 01:45:40,626 --> 01:45:42,502 Look, I saw this in a movie once. 1981 01:45:42,586 --> 01:45:45,004 You go east, I go west, we meet in the subway. 1982 01:45:45,089 --> 01:45:46,130 We'll make it out alive. 1983 01:45:46,215 --> 01:45:49,175 I'm not running with you. Okay? 1984 01:45:49,260 --> 01:45:52,470 I'm not running down the street Iike some biatch. 1985 01:45:52,555 --> 01:45:54,514 Like some biatch, okay? 1986 01:45:54,598 --> 01:45:56,849 Wait. What are you talking about, fool? 1987 01:45:56,934 --> 01:45:59,102 I'm committed to see this through. 1988 01:45:59,228 --> 01:46:01,271 You know what they'll do with you with that mustache in jail? 1989 01:46:01,397 --> 01:46:03,231 You better not snitch. 1990 01:46:03,899 --> 01:46:05,525 - Please. - You kill me. 1991 01:46:05,609 --> 01:46:06,693 - There she is. - Oh, my goodness. 1992 01:46:06,777 --> 01:46:09,988 - Jack, you kill me. - Now, our cover. 1993 01:46:10,072 --> 01:46:11,447 - Yes, thank you. - She got it. 1994 01:46:11,574 --> 01:46:15,159 But if there's anything else you need, you call Jack Goldenberg directly. 1995 01:46:15,244 --> 01:46:16,953 I certainly will. I certainly will. 1996 01:46:17,288 --> 01:46:19,080 - May I help you? - Oh, you're delightful. 1997 01:46:19,206 --> 01:46:21,291 - What a Iovely woman. - No. I've got it. I've got it. 1998 01:46:21,417 --> 01:46:23,543 You got to stop flirting with me. You ain't getting nothing. 1999 01:46:23,627 --> 01:46:26,462 I see you Iooking at my ass. Don't you do that. Don't you do that. 2000 01:46:26,589 --> 01:46:28,631 - I would never do that. - Stop that flirting with me. 2001 01:46:28,757 --> 01:46:30,758 - What a woman. What a woman. - Thank you so much. 2002 01:46:30,884 --> 01:46:33,261 - I'll see you Iater. AII right. - Well, our pleasure again. 2003 01:46:33,387 --> 01:46:34,596 - Did you get it? - Yes. 2004 01:46:34,722 --> 01:46:36,472 - Let's go. - Yes. 2005 01:46:48,068 --> 01:46:50,612 Thank you very much, sir. Thank you. 2006 01:46:51,280 --> 01:46:53,072 Well, what did he say? 2007 01:46:53,449 --> 01:46:59,162 Well, he's not very happy and neither am I that you took my aunt up to New York. 2008 01:46:59,288 --> 01:47:00,997 To that bank. That's crazy. 2009 01:47:01,123 --> 01:47:04,375 But he's getting a Iot of calls from the charities, they're very happy. 2010 01:47:04,460 --> 01:47:08,129 The press is very excited about it, so he's okay, and so am I. 2011 01:47:08,631 --> 01:47:11,382 Well, what does that mean for me? 2012 01:47:11,467 --> 01:47:14,886 You've helped us gather enough information and evidence against your former bosses 2013 01:47:14,970 --> 01:47:17,138 that we got a pretty solid case. 2014 01:47:17,264 --> 01:47:18,848 With that information, we pressured them, 2015 01:47:18,974 --> 01:47:20,933 and they've agreed to testify against the Malone family, 2016 01:47:21,018 --> 01:47:22,060 so they won't be after you. 2017 01:47:22,144 --> 01:47:25,647 So we just talked about dropping the charges against you. 2018 01:47:26,190 --> 01:47:29,275 What you did, getting those accounts back in order, 2019 01:47:29,360 --> 01:47:32,695 and having all that money wired back to the charities, all 13 of them, 2020 01:47:33,947 --> 01:47:35,740 it's really great. 2021 01:47:35,824 --> 01:47:39,452 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it was. 2022 01:47:39,536 --> 01:47:40,828 You're free to go, George. 2023 01:47:40,954 --> 01:47:42,830 - So I'm free? - Yeah. 2024 01:47:43,916 --> 01:47:44,999 Enjoy your Iife, George. 2025 01:47:45,084 --> 01:47:48,002 Take care of yourself. Stay out of trouble. 2026 01:47:48,087 --> 01:47:56,594 Thank you. 2027 01:47:57,179 --> 01:47:58,680 The other way. 2028 01:47:59,807 --> 01:48:01,140 Thank you. 2029 01:48:03,435 --> 01:48:06,854 This has been Iovely. It's just been so fun having y'all here. 2030 01:48:06,939 --> 01:48:09,190 Madea, thank you. 2031 01:48:09,316 --> 01:48:10,942 Thanks for everything. 2032 01:48:11,026 --> 01:48:13,778 You have no idea how much I wanna say, "Get the hell out." 2033 01:48:13,862 --> 01:48:16,781 But I'm holding that in, because I'm showing so much Iove to you. 2034 01:48:16,865 --> 01:48:18,282 I enjoyed having y'all here. 2035 01:48:18,367 --> 01:48:20,326 The best part about company is when they Ieave. 2036 01:48:20,703 --> 01:48:22,829 I'm gonna miss you so much, Madea. 2037 01:48:23,205 --> 01:48:27,208 That's okay, child. AII them potatoes in my house is glad you Ieaving. 2038 01:48:27,292 --> 01:48:28,793 - Me, too. - Yeah? 2039 01:48:28,877 --> 01:48:30,545 Can we come back and visit? 2040 01:48:32,881 --> 01:48:34,882 That is so sweet. You wanna come back and visit? 2041 01:48:34,967 --> 01:48:37,468 No, I don't think so. I'm sorry. 2042 01:48:37,553 --> 01:48:38,636 You can write me Ietters, though. 2043 01:48:38,721 --> 01:48:42,807 Long, Iong, Iong Ietters. Dissertations from very, very, very far away. 2044 01:48:42,891 --> 01:48:44,308 Negros. 2045 01:48:48,689 --> 01:48:51,315 Okay, time to get her the hell out of here. 2046 01:48:51,400 --> 01:48:53,735 - Spirituals. - Now she gets it. 2047 01:48:53,861 --> 01:48:57,071 Okay, Mom, Iet's go. One Iast time. 2048 01:48:57,156 --> 01:48:58,489 Let's go. 2049 01:48:59,867 --> 01:49:02,160 There's my boy. There's my boy. 2050 01:49:02,244 --> 01:49:04,203 Bye, Joe. I'll be back. 2051 01:49:05,080 --> 01:49:07,582 I'll be back, Joe. Bye. 2052 01:49:07,708 --> 01:49:09,250 - Y'all, come on. - Bye. 2053 01:49:09,334 --> 01:49:11,252 Mabel, get them the hell out of here now. 2054 01:49:11,336 --> 01:49:12,503 I'll see y'all around. 2055 01:49:13,046 --> 01:49:14,922 Bye. Bye. 2056 01:49:15,048 --> 01:49:16,382 - Bye. - Bye. 2057 01:49:30,898 --> 01:49:31,898 Yes! 2058 01:49:45,078 --> 01:49:46,746 - Love you, Dad. - Love you, Son. 2059 01:50:23,492 --> 01:50:24,492 Yeah! 2060 01:50:25,369 --> 01:50:27,286 I did that. I got that money, baby. 2061 01:50:27,412 --> 01:50:30,498 I got that money! 2062 01:50:35,754 --> 01:50:37,463 I don't want to go to prison, because, you know? 2063 01:50:37,548 --> 01:50:39,632 Food is bad, I'm probably gonna Iose weight. 2064 01:50:39,716 --> 01:50:42,510 Probably go down to nothing and get gang-raped. 2065 01:50:42,594 --> 01:50:44,512 I don't wanna shower in prison. 2066 01:50:44,596 --> 01:50:48,307 They can do strange things to you in prison. 2067 01:50:48,392 --> 01:50:50,017 Do you understand? Do you understand? 2068 01:50:50,102 --> 01:50:54,397 I think I can handle myself. I really do. 2069 01:50:54,523 --> 01:50:57,191 I really do. I just don't want to go through the experience 2070 01:50:57,276 --> 01:50:59,360 of having to do that. Okay? 2071 01:50:59,444 --> 01:51:01,863 I don't want to have to worry about other guys in there. 2072 01:51:01,947 --> 01:51:05,241 When I get so mad, I'm gonna have to use my fists, 2073 01:51:05,325 --> 01:51:07,743 you know, just to defend myself. 2074 01:51:07,828 --> 01:51:10,121 Go upstairs and get your mom's pills. 2075 01:51:10,205 --> 01:51:14,041 - Find a Iittle straitjacket and calm down... - And a straitjacket, too. 2076 01:51:14,126 --> 01:51:15,751 Figure this out, Maysie. 2077 01:51:15,836 --> 01:51:17,295 And then you put in that fatback grease, 2078 01:51:17,379 --> 01:51:19,672 and you make sure it just sits there and soak, so it'll be Iight. 2079 01:51:19,756 --> 01:51:21,132 I got some oatmeal on the stove, 2080 01:51:21,216 --> 01:51:23,301 and I got some greens that's gonna clean you out. 2081 01:51:23,385 --> 01:51:25,011 It's Iike none of this is gonna matter. 2082 01:51:26,513 --> 01:51:27,555 AII right. 2083 01:51:27,639 --> 01:51:30,182 That's pretty good for never doing it. 2084 01:51:30,976 --> 01:51:32,226 Oh, boy. 2085 01:51:33,645 --> 01:51:36,022 - Is she doing it, too? Wow. - Yeah. 2086 01:51:36,565 --> 01:51:38,482 She kept her promise. 2087 01:51:38,567 --> 01:51:40,526 - What the hell? Charlie Sheen. - Hey. What a surprise. 2088 01:51:40,611 --> 01:51:42,945 How are you? Look who back here. Look who back here hiding. 2089 01:51:43,030 --> 01:51:44,071 It's Charlie Sheen. 2090 01:51:44,156 --> 01:51:45,573 - Big fan. - I'm a big fan of yours, too. 2091 01:51:45,657 --> 01:51:46,824 I've wanted to do this ever since... I'm sorry. 2092 01:51:46,909 --> 01:51:49,493 - That's freaky. That's freaky. That's freaky. - Damn. Sorry, sorry. 2093 01:51:49,578 --> 01:51:52,163 Go on. Go on, rest yourself. Rest yourself. 2094 01:51:52,247 --> 01:51:54,707 - No motorboating. No motorboating. - Cut. 2095 01:51:55,375 --> 01:51:56,500 Where's Howie? 2096 01:51:56,585 --> 01:51:58,794 Oh, God, you don't even want to know what happened to Howie. 2097 01:51:58,879 --> 01:52:00,504 It was so awful. 2098 01:52:00,589 --> 01:52:03,299 They just told me there was a buffalo and a monkey somewhere, 2099 01:52:03,383 --> 01:52:07,136 and I just have not been able to figure how they got out of the zoo. 2100 01:52:07,220 --> 01:52:08,721 I'm sorry. 2101 01:52:10,015 --> 01:52:12,642 I am 6'4" tall and a woman. 2102 01:52:12,726 --> 01:52:14,727 Do you think I have self-esteem issues? 2103 01:52:14,811 --> 01:52:17,521 I ain't never played for the WNBA, but I could. 2104 01:52:17,606 --> 01:52:19,398 I ain't got no self-esteem issues, hell. 2105 01:52:19,483 --> 01:52:23,152 I got a mustache. Do you understand? I'm a dude up under this stuff. 2106 01:52:23,654 --> 01:52:27,573 Sorry, this is Precious Jackson. I'm in the Presidential Suite. 2107 01:52:27,824 --> 01:52:31,035 And there are two toilets here. 2108 01:52:31,119 --> 01:52:35,331 And I was trying to figure out, which one am I supposed to use? 2109 01:52:35,415 --> 01:52:40,294 I don't know which one suits me best. One of them has things on it Iike a faucet. 2110 01:52:40,921 --> 01:52:42,630 What is that for? 2111 01:52:45,217 --> 01:52:47,385 Yes, you know how you turn on the faucet. 2112 01:52:50,055 --> 01:52:52,765 I'm not a sir, I'm a ma'am. You don't hear me, honey? 2113 01:52:54,142 --> 01:52:56,978 Okay, yes, there's two toilets here. 2114 01:52:57,062 --> 01:53:00,356 There's one that I recognize and then there's one that I don't recognize. 2115 01:53:00,440 --> 01:53:04,276 It's got two handles on it, Iike you gonna wash your hands or something. 2116 01:53:04,361 --> 01:53:06,195 A bidet? What is a bidet, honey? 2117 01:53:06,279 --> 01:53:10,157 I don't need Bengays and all that stuff. Just trying to figure out what the toilet is. 2118 01:53:16,289 --> 01:53:18,082 Right. Your hands? 2119 01:53:20,293 --> 01:53:22,336 It's for washing your ass? 2120 01:53:25,882 --> 01:53:28,175 No, when I wanna wash my ass, I take a bath, honey. 2121 01:53:28,260 --> 01:53:30,469 That's just nasty. Now who'd do that? 2122 01:53:33,348 --> 01:53:35,808 Listen, I didn't know you were gonna answer the phone. 2123 01:53:35,892 --> 01:53:38,394 I thought the phone was disconnected. I'm so sorry. 2124 01:53:38,478 --> 01:53:40,855 Okay. I'll talk to you Iater. Bye. 2125 01:53:42,357 --> 01:53:43,774 There was actually somebody there? 2126 01:53:43,859 --> 01:53:46,819 Yes. Yes, the whole time. 2127 01:53:46,903 --> 01:53:49,780 She was trying to explain to me what it was. 2128 01:53:50,240 --> 01:53:53,659 I'd Iike to order one of your famous... 2129 01:53:55,454 --> 01:53:59,081 Baby, this say hamburgers $45. What the hell is on the burger? 2130 01:54:00,333 --> 01:54:03,961 No, no, no. For $45, there better be more than a hamburger. 2131 01:54:05,464 --> 01:54:09,842 For $45, it better get up in this bed and roll around with me for a Iittle while. 2132 01:54:11,178 --> 01:54:13,554 You don't think that's funny. Okay. 2133 01:54:13,638 --> 01:54:17,058 No. Do you have chicken wings? 2134 01:54:19,186 --> 01:54:20,227 You don't do those. 2135 01:54:20,312 --> 01:54:23,397 Well, maybe you can ask the chef to prepare them for me, then. 2136 01:54:24,483 --> 01:54:25,691 Yes. 2137 01:54:25,776 --> 01:54:30,029 How many would I Iike? That depends. How many are there in the order? 2138 01:54:31,656 --> 01:54:35,576 Okay, seven chicken wings. Okay. How much are the seven chicken wings? 2139 01:54:39,164 --> 01:54:40,539 $30 a wing? 2140 01:54:41,833 --> 01:54:43,793 30 damn dollars a wing? 2141 01:54:45,087 --> 01:54:47,671 You crazy as hell. People pay that? 2142 01:54:48,465 --> 01:54:51,258 No, honey, I can't. $30 for a damn chicken wing? 2143 01:54:51,343 --> 01:54:52,843 Do you know that I can get 20 of them, 2144 01:54:52,928 --> 01:54:55,721 they come in a pack, 20 for $1 .99 down at Roscoe's? 2145 01:54:55,806 --> 01:54:58,891 I can't have this, honey. No, I'm gonna starve in this hotel. 2146 01:54:59,392 --> 01:55:04,522 My name is Precious Jackson. 2147 01:55:05,357 --> 01:55:08,150 My name is Melinda. 2148 01:55:08,819 --> 01:55:10,486 Hello, I'm Precious Jackson. 2149 01:55:10,570 --> 01:55:13,405 Yo. Yo, what's up? I'm Precious. They call me Precious. 2150 01:55:27,045 --> 01:55:29,630 I thought you were, you know, some tough guy from the hood? 2151 01:55:29,714 --> 01:55:31,841 You know, "My biggest nightmare." 2152 01:55:31,925 --> 01:55:35,469 Thug Iife, fool. Thug Iife, fool. 2153 01:55:35,887 --> 01:55:38,722 Do me a favor. Send your old man some money every now and then. 2154 01:55:38,807 --> 01:55:40,933 Just a Iittle something. It ain't got to be nothing. 2155 01:55:41,017 --> 01:55:44,311 Just four, five, $20,000, $30,000 a month or something, you know? 2156 01:55:46,231 --> 01:55:47,398 You okay? 2157 01:55:47,482 --> 01:55:51,735 I'll put a Iittle something in an envelope. Don't worry. We'll take care of you. 2158 01:55:51,820 --> 01:55:56,407 Okay. And Iisten, don't write no checks, 'cause I got a Iittle trouble with the IRS. 2159 01:55:56,491 --> 01:55:58,534 Okay. Well, it'll just be cash. 2160 01:55:58,618 --> 01:56:00,995 - Okay, good. - Just be cash. That's the cleanest. 2161 01:56:01,079 --> 01:56:03,622 Yeah, yeah, that's the way the dope boy do it. 2162 01:56:03,707 --> 01:56:06,167 - You can spend cash. - Yes, you can. Yes, you can. 2163 01:56:06,251 --> 01:56:10,671 I know a Iot of ways to spend them. I'll be making it rain. 2164 01:56:10,755 --> 01:56:12,798 - Joe, a real pleasure meeting you. - Yeah? 2165 01:56:12,883 --> 01:56:14,884 - Yeah, get your hand off me, son. - I'm sorry. 2166 01:56:14,968 --> 01:56:16,886 I don't Iike people touching me. Folks don't wash their hands. 2167 01:56:16,970 --> 01:56:18,929 AII right, Dad. 2168 01:56:19,014 --> 01:56:20,556 - AII right, son. Son. - Dad. 2169 01:56:20,640 --> 01:56:22,099 - Okay. - AII right. 2170 01:56:22,184 --> 01:56:24,143 - I Iove you now. - I Iove you, too, Dad. 2171 01:56:24,227 --> 01:56:26,979 I Iove you. I Iove you with the Iove of the Lord. 2172 01:56:27,063 --> 01:56:28,230 He thinks I'm his son. 2173 01:56:28,607 --> 01:56:31,108 Well, this has been a Iovely, Iovely, Iovely... 2174 01:56:31,860 --> 01:56:33,360 Been a great movie. Didn't you enjoy it? 2175 01:56:33,445 --> 01:56:34,570 Good night. 171540

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