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1
00:00:08,883 --> 00:00:10,885
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
2
00:01:24,083 --> 00:01:25,084
(TIRES SCREECHING)
3
00:01:28,504 --> 00:01:29,922
(CARS HONKING)
4
00:01:30,548 --> 00:01:31,882
(YELLING) You jerks!
5
00:01:36,304 --> 00:01:37,664
- (WOMAN SCREAMING)
- (DOG YELPING)
6
00:01:37,805 --> 00:01:39,140
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
7
00:01:45,771 --> 00:01:49,525
Ah! The wind in my hair
and the Batman at my heels.
8
00:01:50,192 --> 00:01:53,321
It's the kind of night that
makes you glad to be alive.
9
00:01:53,988 --> 00:01:55,531
Right, Harley girl?
10
00:01:56,449 --> 00:01:58,409
Sure thing, Mr. J.
11
00:02:07,001 --> 00:02:08,502
Quick! Turn here!
12
00:02:10,129 --> 00:02:12,798
- But, boss, that's...
- I said, turn!
13
00:02:13,382 --> 00:02:14,383
Yes, sir.
14
00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:15,593
(TIRES SCREECHING)
15
00:02:17,678 --> 00:02:19,930
(EXCLAIMS)
16
00:02:27,730 --> 00:02:28,981
(GROANS)
17
00:02:30,983 --> 00:02:33,527
Why didn't you tell me
someone put a hill there?
18
00:02:33,611 --> 00:02:36,906
- I tried, but...
- Never mind. Just hand me the gun.
19
00:02:39,533 --> 00:02:41,494
(SNAPS FINGERS) Come on! Come on!
20
00:02:43,913 --> 00:02:44,914
Here.
21
00:02:45,748 --> 00:02:47,291
Hey, Batsy!
22
00:02:47,458 --> 00:02:49,794
This is where I leave you flat.
23
00:02:49,877 --> 00:02:51,212
(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)
24
00:02:56,217 --> 00:02:57,843
You nincompoop!
25
00:02:58,260 --> 00:02:59,428
(YELPS)
26
00:02:59,845 --> 00:03:01,305
You didn't say which gun.
27
00:03:17,238 --> 00:03:18,698
(BRAKES SCREECHING)
28
00:03:24,954 --> 00:03:26,539
(TIRES SCREECHING)
29
00:03:27,373 --> 00:03:29,125
Let's go. Let's go!
30
00:03:29,291 --> 00:03:30,626
(ENGINE REVVING)
31
00:03:34,004 --> 00:03:36,841
If he wants the car that bad,
he can have it.
32
00:03:48,352 --> 00:03:49,854
Next time, clown.
33
00:03:56,235 --> 00:03:58,779
JOKER: No, we didn't get the diamond.
34
00:03:59,363 --> 00:04:02,783
The "Dork Knight" showed up
before we even got to the museum.
35
00:04:03,117 --> 00:04:05,202
I had a great shot at him, too,
36
00:04:05,286 --> 00:04:10,833
except my dear little Harley Quinn
handed me the wrong gun!
37
00:04:11,375 --> 00:04:13,127
(BARKING)
38
00:04:13,210 --> 00:04:15,921
But, pudding, it was kind of funny
watching you shoot at him
39
00:04:16,005 --> 00:04:17,673
with the "bang" flag.
40
00:04:18,299 --> 00:04:19,842
(BOTH GIGGLING)
41
00:04:23,679 --> 00:04:24,680
Funny?
42
00:04:25,055 --> 00:04:29,268
You presume to tell me what
I should think is funny?
43
00:04:29,435 --> 00:04:31,937
(YELLING) In fact, when have you ever
44
00:04:32,104 --> 00:04:34,523
contributed a worthwhile idea
to this gang?
45
00:04:35,357 --> 00:04:37,943
(STAMMERING) Well,
I did get us away from Batman.
46
00:04:38,486 --> 00:04:40,029
Huzzah!
47
00:04:40,112 --> 00:04:42,364
The kid gets lucky,
and she wants a medal!
48
00:04:44,533 --> 00:04:46,827
Maybe I should just let
you run the gang.
49
00:04:47,286 --> 00:04:50,080
Maybe you're a better crook
than the rest of us put together.
50
00:04:50,706 --> 00:04:51,832
Maybe
51
00:04:52,666 --> 00:04:53,667
(TIMIDLY) not.
52
00:04:54,084 --> 00:04:55,419
(BOTH SMIRKING)
53
00:04:55,669 --> 00:04:57,171
(HYENAS LAUGHING)
54
00:05:01,842 --> 00:05:04,887
(JOKER GROWLING)
55
00:05:05,429 --> 00:05:06,639
(YELPS)
56
00:05:13,604 --> 00:05:16,565
Fine! I'll show you! You'll be sorry!
57
00:05:16,649 --> 00:05:19,026
I'll pull a big heist,
and I'll be laughing at you.
58
00:05:19,109 --> 00:05:21,445
Ha! Ha! You hear? Laughing!
59
00:05:30,204 --> 00:05:31,705
I miss him already.
60
00:06:06,365 --> 00:06:07,491
Piece of cake.
61
00:06:12,913 --> 00:06:15,875
Mr. J will just plotz when I give him...
62
00:06:17,543 --> 00:06:20,254
No. I'm keeping it for myself.
63
00:06:21,755 --> 00:06:22,756
Maybe.
64
00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:33,058
(ALARM RINGING)
65
00:06:36,103 --> 00:06:37,313
The heck with it!
66
00:06:50,993 --> 00:06:51,994
(SIREN WAILING)
67
00:06:55,456 --> 00:06:56,457
(GASPING)
68
00:07:00,461 --> 00:07:02,087
Nice work, butterfingers.
69
00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:05,090
Why didn't you just turn on
the Bat signal while you were at it?
70
00:07:06,008 --> 00:07:07,676
I wasn't trying to get caught.
71
00:07:08,135 --> 00:07:09,595
Could've fooled me.
72
00:07:09,803 --> 00:07:13,307
Hey! Aren't you that plant lady,
Poison Oakie?
73
00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:15,601
Ivy. Poison Ivy.
74
00:07:16,101 --> 00:07:17,144
Sorry.
75
00:07:17,561 --> 00:07:19,730
Harley Quinn. Pleased to meet you.
76
00:07:20,230 --> 00:07:21,231
(DOOR OPENS)
77
00:07:28,656 --> 00:07:30,741
This is not a good time
to get acquainted.
78
00:07:31,325 --> 00:07:32,368
MONTOYA: Freeze!
79
00:07:41,335 --> 00:07:42,670
Any ideas?
80
00:07:45,130 --> 00:07:46,674
What you got in the bottles?
81
00:07:47,591 --> 00:07:49,593
POISON IVY: Plant toxins
from the museum lab.
82
00:07:51,303 --> 00:07:52,638
Good enough.
83
00:07:57,476 --> 00:07:58,519
Heads up!
84
00:08:01,772 --> 00:08:04,900
(COUGHING)
85
00:08:07,236 --> 00:08:09,113
MONTOYA:
Stop in the name of the law!
86
00:08:09,863 --> 00:08:11,156
Not tonight, baby.
87
00:08:14,743 --> 00:08:15,911
POISON IVY: Get in the car!
88
00:08:16,161 --> 00:08:17,287
HARLEY: What car?
89
00:08:20,374 --> 00:08:21,792
That car.
90
00:08:22,918 --> 00:08:25,754
(SIREN WAILING)
91
00:08:30,217 --> 00:08:31,510
- Yes!
- Yes!
92
00:08:31,677 --> 00:08:34,930
POISON IVY: This could be the beginning
of a beautiful friendship.
93
00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:50,070
HARLEY: (WHINING) I hate shots!
94
00:08:50,195 --> 00:08:52,072
I hate shots!
95
00:08:52,614 --> 00:08:55,534
Now, now. You're
not immune to poison like I am
96
00:08:55,951 --> 00:08:59,913
and you won't last 10 minutes
here in Toxic Acres without my antidote.
97
00:09:00,539 --> 00:09:02,041
(WHINING)
98
00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:10,007
(SIGHS) You'd think after living with
Mr. J, I'd be used to a little pain.
99
00:09:11,258 --> 00:09:12,968
Why do you put up with that clown?
100
00:09:13,218 --> 00:09:16,638
Don't get me wrong. My pudding's
a little rough sometimes,
101
00:09:16,805 --> 00:09:18,849
but he loves me, really.
102
00:09:19,933 --> 00:09:21,351
Sure he does.
103
00:09:21,435 --> 00:09:24,146
You're just one big forgiving doormat,
aren't you?
104
00:09:24,605 --> 00:09:26,690
I am not a doormat.
105
00:09:27,399 --> 00:09:28,442
Am I?
106
00:09:28,650 --> 00:09:31,737
If you had a middle name,
it would be "Welcome."
107
00:09:33,405 --> 00:09:38,243
But cheer up, kid. You just need some
lessons in good old female self-esteem.
108
00:09:38,577 --> 00:09:42,998
In other words, let's play with the boys
on our terms.
109
00:09:48,796 --> 00:09:51,048
And now, gentlemen,
if there is no new business,
110
00:09:51,381 --> 00:09:52,674
I propose we adjourn to...
111
00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:54,802
POISON IVY:
A moment, please, Mr. Chairman.
112
00:09:55,552 --> 00:09:57,805
(MEN PROTESTING)
113
00:09:57,930 --> 00:09:59,730
- MAN 1: Who is that?
- MAN 2: A woman, here?
114
00:09:59,807 --> 00:10:00,891
CHAIRMAN: Outrageous!
115
00:10:01,058 --> 00:10:03,977
See here, young lady,
is this some kind of joke?
116
00:10:04,394 --> 00:10:06,021
The joke, my dear chairman,
117
00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:10,359
is this obsolete, sexist mockery
you call a men's club.
118
00:10:11,193 --> 00:10:12,569
Now, I ask you,
119
00:10:12,653 --> 00:10:16,198
what kind of adventurers refuse
to admit women?
120
00:10:16,323 --> 00:10:19,535
- MAN 1: What does she know?
- MAN 2: That is ridiculous.
121
00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:21,870
MAN 3: Get her out of here.
How dare she?
122
00:10:21,954 --> 00:10:24,706
(MEN PROTESTING)
123
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:29,670
Still, if it's excitement
you boys crave...
124
00:10:32,589 --> 00:10:33,799
What is this?
125
00:10:33,882 --> 00:10:35,884
- Let go!
- Stop!
126
00:10:36,093 --> 00:10:38,053
(ALL CLAMORING)
127
00:10:40,222 --> 00:10:44,768
That should keep you big strong men
busy while we weak little girls
128
00:10:45,060 --> 00:10:46,854
loot your trophy room.
129
00:10:47,146 --> 00:10:49,815
Gee, Red. You got style!
130
00:10:49,982 --> 00:10:50,983
This is true.
131
00:10:54,194 --> 00:10:56,321
(MEN CLAMORING)
132
00:11:36,153 --> 00:11:39,740
(HARLEY HUMMING)
133
00:11:43,327 --> 00:11:45,037
What did you make? What did you make?
134
00:11:46,371 --> 00:11:49,499
Steamed chard and beet juice. Hmm! Yum!
135
00:11:51,168 --> 00:11:52,502
Gee, green.
136
00:11:52,586 --> 00:11:54,546
My favorite color.
137
00:12:06,475 --> 00:12:08,101
(SIGHS)
138
00:12:08,393 --> 00:12:11,897
No offense, Red,
but I'm not very hungry.
139
00:12:13,190 --> 00:12:16,318
Somehow I don't feel
like my old perky self.
140
00:12:16,902 --> 00:12:18,570
Something's missing.
141
00:12:19,613 --> 00:12:24,034
Will you stop? I can't believe you're
still mooning over that psychotic creep.
142
00:12:24,534 --> 00:12:28,038
Well, maybe I'd feel better
if I knew he missed me, too.
143
00:12:36,046 --> 00:12:37,631
JOKER: (SHOUTING) Harley!
144
00:12:39,007 --> 00:12:41,760
This place is going
to blinking blue blazes.
145
00:12:42,678 --> 00:12:44,263
Anybody seen my socks?
146
00:12:45,097 --> 00:12:46,556
JOKER: Harley!
147
00:12:46,682 --> 00:12:48,242
- (HYENAS SNARLING)
- (JOKER EXCLAIMING)
148
00:12:48,850 --> 00:12:50,602
They snapped at me!
149
00:12:50,727 --> 00:12:52,312
What's going on, Roc?
150
00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:56,858
The place is a mess, no one's fed
the hyenas, and I can't find my socks!
151
00:12:57,276 --> 00:12:58,402
Where's Harley?
152
00:12:59,403 --> 00:13:01,280
(STAMMERING) You canned her,
boss, remember?
153
00:13:01,697 --> 00:13:04,074
So? She's always come back before.
154
00:13:04,658 --> 00:13:05,951
Gee,
155
00:13:06,159 --> 00:13:08,287
I guess you ain't seen the papers then.
156
00:13:08,537 --> 00:13:11,415
Papers? What are you babbling about?
157
00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:19,339
(JOKER SCREAMING)
158
00:13:20,716 --> 00:13:22,801
(SIREN WAILING)
159
00:13:31,685 --> 00:13:33,270
(CRASHING)
160
00:13:36,606 --> 00:13:38,025
(CURSING IN SPANISH)
161
00:13:40,485 --> 00:13:44,364
I remember when I would go driving
like this with Mr. J.
162
00:13:44,781 --> 00:13:47,117
(IMITATING HARLEY) "Mr. J, Mr. J."
163
00:13:48,035 --> 00:13:49,870
Change the record, Harl.
164
00:13:49,953 --> 00:13:52,873
You want to be some wacko's victim
the rest of your life?
165
00:13:59,504 --> 00:14:01,882
Well, hello.
166
00:14:02,007 --> 00:14:04,509
I think I'm in love.
(MAKING KISSING SOUNDS)
167
00:14:05,093 --> 00:14:06,636
Ahooga! Ahooga!
168
00:14:06,887 --> 00:14:08,263
(HOWLS)
169
00:14:09,014 --> 00:14:10,599
Excuse me, boys.
170
00:14:10,682 --> 00:14:15,312
Didn't your mommies tell you that's not
the nice way to get a lady's attention?
171
00:14:15,854 --> 00:14:19,608
Oh! And what are you gonna do? Spank us?
172
00:14:19,941 --> 00:14:23,278
That's right, pigs.
And here's the paddle.
173
00:14:23,737 --> 00:14:25,489
(ALL SCREAM)
174
00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:33,872
There may be hope for you yet.
175
00:14:54,351 --> 00:14:55,894
(COMPUTER BEEPING)
176
00:14:59,272 --> 00:15:00,982
ALFRED: Choosing a weekend date, sir?
177
00:15:01,650 --> 00:15:04,611
BATMAN: This is one sister act
that's hard to follow, Alfred.
178
00:15:04,778 --> 00:15:08,365
Only clue I have is this soil analysis
from their tire tracks.
179
00:15:11,076 --> 00:15:12,077
Hmm.
180
00:15:12,661 --> 00:15:16,123
Contains the same compounds
you'd find in a toxic waste dump.
181
00:15:16,748 --> 00:15:19,918
Then may I suggest an accessory
this evening?
182
00:15:27,801 --> 00:15:29,177
(PHONE RINGING)
183
00:15:31,138 --> 00:15:32,139
JOKER: (YELLING) What?
184
00:15:32,639 --> 00:15:34,307
(TIMIDLY) Mr. J?
185
00:15:35,267 --> 00:15:36,726
Harley?
186
00:15:38,562 --> 00:15:40,647
Hi, pudding. You still angry with me?
187
00:15:41,106 --> 00:15:42,607
(CHUCKLES)
188
00:15:43,525 --> 00:15:46,027
Honey, baby, pumpkin pie.
189
00:15:46,486 --> 00:15:48,155
You know I can't hold a grudge.
190
00:15:48,822 --> 00:15:50,657
- Where are you?
- With a friend.
191
00:15:50,740 --> 00:15:53,785
Look, I can't talk, but I wanted
to let you know I'm okay.
192
00:15:53,869 --> 00:15:55,078
(DOOR CLOSES)
193
00:15:55,162 --> 00:15:57,706
Oops. Gotta go.
I'll talk to you soon.
194
00:15:59,499 --> 00:16:01,626
Sooner than you think.
195
00:16:02,878 --> 00:16:05,088
- What's up?
- Wrong number.
196
00:16:05,172 --> 00:16:06,298
(GLASS BREAKING)
197
00:16:07,382 --> 00:16:08,383
(GASPING)
198
00:16:08,842 --> 00:16:10,010
BATMAN: Evening, ladies.
199
00:16:10,510 --> 00:16:11,845
Playtime's over.
200
00:16:12,804 --> 00:16:14,764
(SARCASTICALLY) Land o' Goshen, Harleen.
201
00:16:14,848 --> 00:16:16,433
Look who's come a-courting.
202
00:16:16,975 --> 00:16:18,643
Looks like he's got us.
203
00:16:18,727 --> 00:16:20,020
Looks like!
204
00:16:22,272 --> 00:16:23,940
(GRUNTING)
205
00:16:27,110 --> 00:16:29,571
POISON IVY: Poor Batman. All trussed up.
206
00:16:29,988 --> 00:16:32,240
And no place to go.
207
00:16:34,576 --> 00:16:35,911
- Yes!
- Yes!
208
00:16:40,999 --> 00:16:43,835
POISON IVY: Here we have
the typical male aggressor,
209
00:16:43,919 --> 00:16:48,381
fittingly imprisoned within the bonds
of female domestic slavery.
210
00:16:53,470 --> 00:16:56,515
HARLEY: And, frankly, folks,
he's never looked better.
211
00:16:56,973 --> 00:16:58,266
Admit it, darling,
212
00:16:58,350 --> 00:17:02,062
you didn't think two women
were capable of bringing you down.
213
00:17:02,646 --> 00:17:06,274
Man or woman,
a sick mind is capable of anything.
214
00:17:06,483 --> 00:17:09,778
A very enlightened statement, Batman.
215
00:17:10,487 --> 00:17:12,405
We'll carve it on your headstone.
216
00:17:13,740 --> 00:17:15,492
HARLEY: Aloha, sucker.
217
00:17:20,455 --> 00:17:22,749
Hey, did you leave the lights on?
218
00:17:29,923 --> 00:17:33,510
JOKER: My, haven't you been
the busy little bees.
219
00:17:34,511 --> 00:17:35,804
Pudding?
220
00:17:36,388 --> 00:17:39,558
You were out, so we just made
ourselves at home.
221
00:17:39,849 --> 00:17:41,226
Hope you don't mind.
222
00:17:41,476 --> 00:17:43,478
You found me!
223
00:17:43,603 --> 00:17:45,313
So much for self-esteem.
224
00:17:49,693 --> 00:17:52,612
I hope you realize
we're on a toxic waste dump.
225
00:17:52,779 --> 00:17:56,616
I'd say you've got 10 minutes
to clear out before the fumes do you in.
226
00:17:58,952 --> 00:18:00,245
She's right, boss.
227
00:18:00,328 --> 00:18:01,955
I'm feeling kind of...
228
00:18:02,497 --> 00:18:03,498
Sick.
229
00:18:03,665 --> 00:18:05,125
Hold it in, Rocco.
230
00:18:06,167 --> 00:18:10,880
I'm only staying long enough
to collect what's mine.
231
00:18:11,006 --> 00:18:12,257
(SQUEALS)
232
00:18:12,591 --> 00:18:13,592
Hey!
233
00:18:26,146 --> 00:18:27,147
(GASPS)
234
00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:28,982
(PANTING)
235
00:18:34,154 --> 00:18:37,073
Ooh! Look at the goodies.
236
00:18:37,782 --> 00:18:39,367
That's ours, you louse!
237
00:18:39,743 --> 00:18:43,622
Pammy, I wouldn't
leave you empty-handed.
238
00:18:44,205 --> 00:18:46,541
JOKER: Since you like flowers so much...
239
00:18:47,584 --> 00:18:49,002
Oh, Pudding, no!
240
00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:52,631
You can have mine!
241
00:18:53,715 --> 00:18:55,258
(COUGHING)
242
00:18:56,051 --> 00:18:57,052
Oh!
243
00:18:57,218 --> 00:18:58,219
Red!
244
00:19:00,096 --> 00:19:01,431
(LAUGHS)
245
00:19:03,391 --> 00:19:05,060
It doesn't work on me.
246
00:19:10,023 --> 00:19:11,608
(BOTH GRUNTING)
247
00:19:19,741 --> 00:19:20,742
Get them!
248
00:19:28,958 --> 00:19:30,251
(BOTH GROAN)
249
00:19:37,258 --> 00:19:39,052
(BATMAN GRUNTING)
250
00:19:42,138 --> 00:19:44,641
(TIRES SCREECHING)
251
00:19:50,563 --> 00:19:51,898
Oh, Batsy!
252
00:20:01,908 --> 00:20:03,388
(YELLING) Stop shooting, you lunatic.
253
00:20:03,451 --> 00:20:05,036
We're sitting on a powder keg.
254
00:20:29,978 --> 00:20:31,771
Oops. Dopey me.
255
00:20:33,148 --> 00:20:34,149
(GRUNTS)
256
00:20:50,623 --> 00:20:52,167
(ENGINE STARTING)
257
00:20:55,879 --> 00:20:56,880
(ENGINE REVVING)
258
00:20:57,088 --> 00:20:58,798
(TIRES SCREECHING)
259
00:21:11,603 --> 00:21:14,147
No man can take us prisoner.
260
00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:16,816
(GUNSHOT)
261
00:21:16,900 --> 00:21:18,193
(BOTH SCREAM)
262
00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:24,449
All right, ladies.
263
00:21:24,783 --> 00:21:25,867
Raise them.
264
00:21:26,659 --> 00:21:28,495
(CHATTERING ON POLICE RADIO)
265
00:21:33,833 --> 00:21:35,251
JOKER: That's it.
266
00:21:35,335 --> 00:21:39,005
Next time I start a gang, no women.
267
00:21:39,464 --> 00:21:40,715
(SHOUTING) Do you hear me?
268
00:21:40,924 --> 00:21:42,383
No women!
269
00:21:43,009 --> 00:21:45,303
I think we can still work it out.
270
00:21:45,470 --> 00:21:46,721
Don't you?
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