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1
00:00:12,353 --> 00:00:13,854
MAN 1:
Oh, no. Here comes a speech.
2
00:00:14,021 --> 00:00:16,107
MAN 2:
Just when I started to enjoy myself.
3
00:00:16,273 --> 00:00:17,775
[CHUCKLING]
4
00:00:18,526 --> 00:00:20,069
Andy...
5
00:00:20,236 --> 00:00:22,404
...all my life I've dreamed of...
6
00:00:22,613 --> 00:00:26,159
...packing up and leaving the city
and the newspaper business behind.
7
00:00:26,326 --> 00:00:29,037
What stopped you, Jack?
Give it a shot.
8
00:00:29,204 --> 00:00:31,873
And moving to some quiet little town
in the country...
9
00:00:32,040 --> 00:00:33,792
...and putting down on paper...
10
00:00:33,959 --> 00:00:36,128
...the novel I know I have inside of me.
11
00:00:36,294 --> 00:00:38,839
MAN 3:
That's not a novel, Jack. It's heartburn.
12
00:00:39,005 --> 00:00:40,257
[LAUGHING]
13
00:00:40,423 --> 00:00:43,260
But for one reason or another,
I never followed that dream.
14
00:00:43,426 --> 00:00:44,594
MAN 2:
No talent.
15
00:00:44,761 --> 00:00:47,681
And to be honest with myself,
I probably never will.
16
00:00:47,848 --> 00:00:49,182
Thank God for that.
17
00:00:49,349 --> 00:00:51,727
But you are, Andy.
18
00:00:51,894 --> 00:00:54,230
You're gonna live out
that dream for me...
19
00:00:54,397 --> 00:00:57,024
...and possibly for every man
seated around this table.
20
00:00:57,191 --> 00:00:58,734
MAN 4:
Not me.
21
00:00:59,193 --> 00:01:02,071
So, Andy, I believe...
22
00:01:02,238 --> 00:01:06,576
...I speak to the feelings
in all our hearts when I say to you:
23
00:01:06,742 --> 00:01:08,161
"You son of a bitch."
24
00:01:08,327 --> 00:01:10,246
[LAUGHING AND APPLAUDING]
25
00:01:13,082 --> 00:01:15,042
Seriously...
26
00:01:15,459 --> 00:01:16,712
...we'll miss you, Andy.
27
00:01:16,879 --> 00:01:20,257
Good sports writers are hard to find.
28
00:01:20,716 --> 00:01:25,679
- Lord knows, I have never found one.
MAN 2: Hey, hey, hey.
29
00:01:26,096 --> 00:01:30,809
Well, I guess I wouldn't be much of
a newspaper man if I didn't know that...
30
00:01:30,976 --> 00:01:35,606
...all of this cynicism merely masks
deeper feelings of resentment and envy.
31
00:01:36,940 --> 00:01:39,943
But seriously, this is really great and...
32
00:01:40,110 --> 00:01:41,486
...I'm touched.
HARRY: Hey, Andy.
33
00:01:41,653 --> 00:01:45,116
- What's the book gonna be about?
-About 300 pages, Harry.
34
00:01:45,283 --> 00:01:47,452
Show them the check, Andy.
35
00:01:48,161 --> 00:01:50,121
Merely an advance...
36
00:01:50,288 --> 00:01:54,000
...of $10,000.
-Oh, that should cover your airfare back.
37
00:01:54,167 --> 00:01:56,628
As the heir apparent
to your Giants season tickets...
38
00:01:56,794 --> 00:01:58,922
...I wish you all the success in the world.
39
00:01:59,088 --> 00:02:00,548
HARRY:
Don't get your hopes up, Ray.
40
00:02:00,715 --> 00:02:03,635
He'll be back before the preseason ends,
if he goes at all.
41
00:02:03,801 --> 00:02:06,804
No, I don't think so.
This move is for keeps.
42
00:02:06,971 --> 00:02:08,807
That's what Billy Martin said.
43
00:02:09,808 --> 00:02:12,061
Elizabeth and I have made a commitment.
44
00:02:12,228 --> 00:02:15,105
- We're even gonna start a family.
-My God. More Andy Farmers.
45
00:02:15,272 --> 00:02:18,776
HARRY: Yeah, give it a shot.
-So even if I wanted to move back...
46
00:02:18,943 --> 00:02:20,736
...Elizabeth would never let us.
47
00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:27,660
- All set?
-Yes.
48
00:02:28,744 --> 00:02:30,579
Give me a kiss.
49
00:02:32,373 --> 00:02:33,959
We're off.
50
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:37,254
Redbud, here we come.
51
00:03:12,206 --> 00:03:13,708
Hey, there's our movers.
52
00:03:16,377 --> 00:03:18,462
[HORN HONKING]
53
00:03:19,380 --> 00:03:21,340
Hey, fellas!
54
00:03:21,590 --> 00:03:23,676
See you up there!
55
00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:27,264
- Who the hell was that?
-How should I know?
56
00:04:27,451 --> 00:04:28,702
Elizabeth?
57
00:04:29,286 --> 00:04:31,121
Elizabeth?
58
00:04:36,126 --> 00:04:38,712
Look at these. These are even better.
59
00:04:38,879 --> 00:04:42,257
- Oh, by far. Mm-hm.
-Shh-shh-shh.
60
00:04:42,424 --> 00:04:44,761
[FLY BUZZING]
61
00:05:06,616 --> 00:05:08,494
[CREAKING]
62
00:05:12,331 --> 00:05:15,167
[SAWING]
63
00:05:32,101 --> 00:05:34,229
Let's get out of here.
64
00:05:35,147 --> 00:05:38,608
- This is the best one yet.
-We can trade it for a "railroad crossing."
65
00:05:49,995 --> 00:05:52,456
Woo-had.!
66
00:06:09,390 --> 00:06:12,018
Am I crazy or is it even prettier
than when we bought it?
67
00:06:12,185 --> 00:06:13,603
No. You're right.
68
00:06:13,811 --> 00:06:15,229
I am right, it is prettier.
69
00:06:15,396 --> 00:06:16,481
[DUCKS QUACKING]
70
00:06:16,647 --> 00:06:18,983
And, look, the ducks are still here.
71
00:06:20,193 --> 00:06:22,487
ELIZABETH:
I think they must live here, Andy.
72
00:06:22,653 --> 00:06:23,821
That means they're ours.
73
00:06:26,116 --> 00:06:28,785
How about that, Elizabeth?
We own ducks.
74
00:06:28,952 --> 00:06:30,913
We're duck owners.
75
00:06:31,747 --> 00:06:35,584
I bet I could reach in there
with my bare hands and pull out a fish.
76
00:06:37,586 --> 00:06:39,213
Come on, let's go inside.
77
00:06:39,379 --> 00:06:41,340
[FLY BUZZING]
78
00:06:48,347 --> 00:06:51,809
Wait. This is our first real house.
I'll carry you in.
79
00:06:51,976 --> 00:06:53,019
[GROANS]
80
00:06:53,186 --> 00:06:55,605
ELIZABETH: I heard that.
-Nonsense. You're light as a feather.
81
00:06:55,772 --> 00:06:56,940
[ELIZABETH SCREAMS]
82
00:06:57,106 --> 00:06:58,733
Jeez!
83
00:06:59,067 --> 00:07:03,279
Honey! Oh, God, are you all right?
Oh, I'm sorry.
84
00:07:03,780 --> 00:07:06,533
Oh, baby. It's that damn door.
85
00:07:06,699 --> 00:07:08,076
ELIZABETH:
Oh!
86
00:07:08,243 --> 00:07:09,619
Sweetie pie, I'm sorry.
87
00:07:09,786 --> 00:07:12,580
- Are you better? Are you okay?
-Yeah.
88
00:07:12,747 --> 00:07:15,083
- Okay.
-Yeah.
89
00:07:15,250 --> 00:07:16,834
Well...
90
00:07:17,753 --> 00:07:20,631
...welcome to our new home.
91
00:07:20,798 --> 00:07:22,383
Come on.
92
00:07:26,512 --> 00:07:30,683
I wonder how long it would take
for an ambulance to reach us out here.
93
00:07:42,069 --> 00:07:44,197
Let me see that map again.
94
00:07:53,498 --> 00:07:54,916
Which way does it go?
95
00:07:55,083 --> 00:07:56,793
Don't ask me. I'm the assistant.
96
00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:58,878
Where's north? Which is south?
97
00:08:01,423 --> 00:08:02,549
Maybe this.
98
00:08:02,716 --> 00:08:04,301
Who the hell drew this map?
99
00:08:09,348 --> 00:08:11,183
Juice is on.
100
00:08:12,018 --> 00:08:14,520
Water's on. Everything's on track in here.
101
00:08:14,687 --> 00:08:15,980
No phone.
102
00:08:16,147 --> 00:08:18,065
No phone.
They didn't install the phone.
103
00:08:18,274 --> 00:08:21,068
They were supposed to install
a sandstone-beige wall phone...
104
00:08:21,235 --> 00:08:24,363
...next to this window.
-I don't get it.
105
00:08:24,530 --> 00:08:28,326
I ordered that phone in writing a month
in advance. I paid a $50 deposit.
106
00:08:28,492 --> 00:08:31,787
Be that as it may, Andy,
there's no telephone in this kitchen.
107
00:08:31,954 --> 00:08:36,126
Well, 200 years ago, the settlers lived
their entire lives without telephones.
108
00:08:36,293 --> 00:08:39,171
We can manage a day or two
till I get this straightened out.
109
00:08:39,338 --> 00:08:41,298
Okay. Then let's get something to eat.
110
00:08:42,215 --> 00:08:43,550
You can't be hungry already.
111
00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:45,969
Honey, we ate hours ago.
112
00:08:46,136 --> 00:08:49,389
As soon as the movers arrive and unload,
we'll zip into Redbud...
113
00:08:49,556 --> 00:08:52,726
...for an old-fashioned home-cooked meal.
114
00:08:52,893 --> 00:08:53,977
Whatever you say.
115
00:09:12,413 --> 00:09:15,583
Hey, Mac. Which way to Redbud?
116
00:09:16,167 --> 00:09:17,960
How'd you know my name was Mac?
117
00:09:18,461 --> 00:09:19,754
Just guessed.
118
00:09:20,254 --> 00:09:22,423
Then why don't you guess
your way to Redbud?
119
00:09:38,524 --> 00:09:40,192
Elizabeth?
120
00:09:40,359 --> 00:09:42,069
ELIZABETH:
Yeah.
121
00:09:42,277 --> 00:09:45,114
My writing room.
Tell me what you think.
122
00:09:45,531 --> 00:09:49,785
Originally I thought I should put my desk
here so I could look out over the pond.
123
00:09:49,952 --> 00:09:52,080
Then I thought,
no, too many distractions.
124
00:09:52,247 --> 00:09:55,083
So I should put the desk over here
facing this way...
125
00:09:55,250 --> 00:09:58,503
...and I can put the bookshelves
over there. What do you think?
126
00:09:58,670 --> 00:09:59,713
[BIRD CHIRPING]
127
00:09:59,879 --> 00:10:02,590
- Well, I'll tell you what.
-Shh-shh-shh.
128
00:10:09,305 --> 00:10:11,182
Come here, look at this.
129
00:10:15,019 --> 00:10:16,938
What is that, a finch? A lark?
130
00:10:18,899 --> 00:10:21,736
I think it's a sparrow, Andy.
131
00:10:22,069 --> 00:10:24,029
It's perfect.
132
00:10:24,196 --> 00:10:25,614
Isn't it perfect, Elizabeth?
133
00:10:25,781 --> 00:10:28,325
A bird's nest right outside
my writing room window.
134
00:10:28,492 --> 00:10:32,830
Oh, Andy. I don't think I've ever
seen you this happy before.
135
00:10:32,997 --> 00:10:34,749
Well, why shouldn't I be happy?
136
00:10:34,999 --> 00:10:37,543
We bought a house in the country.
Gonna write my novel.
137
00:10:37,710 --> 00:10:40,212
We're gonna start a new family.
138
00:10:40,379 --> 00:10:43,800
When was the last time we horsed around
in the middle of the day?
139
00:10:43,967 --> 00:10:46,470
Six years ago when we were both
down with the flu.
140
00:10:47,012 --> 00:10:49,264
That's too long.
141
00:10:52,934 --> 00:10:54,686
Now?
142
00:10:54,936 --> 00:10:56,396
- Here?
-Mm-hm.
143
00:10:56,563 --> 00:10:58,857
Yes, on both counts.
144
00:10:59,024 --> 00:11:01,109
ELIZABETH:
Shouldn't we wait for the bed to arrive?
145
00:11:01,276 --> 00:11:05,447
ANDY: Oh, no. The settlers 200 years ago
never needed beds.
146
00:11:05,864 --> 00:11:08,743
ELIZABETH:
No sense breaking with tradition now.
147
00:11:08,910 --> 00:11:11,329
[HORN HONKING]
148
00:11:11,496 --> 00:11:12,914
AN DY:
Listen.
149
00:11:17,043 --> 00:11:18,878
What was that?
150
00:11:19,378 --> 00:11:21,547
I didn't hear anything.
151
00:11:22,089 --> 00:11:23,508
[HORN HONKING]
152
00:11:23,674 --> 00:11:25,218
AN DY:
No.
153
00:11:28,554 --> 00:11:30,223
It's them.
154
00:11:31,224 --> 00:11:33,267
The movers are here.
155
00:11:36,688 --> 00:11:38,524
Terrific.
156
00:11:41,568 --> 00:11:43,654
Maybe now we can eat.
157
00:11:43,821 --> 00:11:46,323
[TIRES SQUEALING]
158
00:11:47,991 --> 00:11:49,743
Andy?
159
00:11:49,910 --> 00:11:51,203
Hey. Andy?
160
00:12:03,091 --> 00:12:05,218
Andy, look out!
161
00:12:05,385 --> 00:12:07,345
[PETREE CACKLING]
162
00:12:09,430 --> 00:12:13,226
- Honey, are you all right?
-Jesus. What the hell was that?
163
00:12:13,393 --> 00:12:15,520
Who was that maniac?
164
00:12:19,774 --> 00:12:21,192
What is it, a death threat?
165
00:12:21,359 --> 00:12:22,777
No, it's a letter...
166
00:12:22,944 --> 00:12:26,740
...addressed to the people we bought
the house from, the Musselmans.
167
00:12:26,907 --> 00:12:30,828
- A letter?
-This is mail, Andy.
168
00:12:31,078 --> 00:12:34,498
That maniac is our mailman.
169
00:12:35,457 --> 00:12:38,419
I guess there's a lot we'll have to
get used to around here.
170
00:12:38,711 --> 00:12:43,299
But I bet those are just the things
we come to love the mo--
171
00:12:43,465 --> 00:12:44,633
What was that for'?
172
00:12:45,301 --> 00:12:46,552
A mosquito.
173
00:12:46,719 --> 00:12:48,554
Honest.
174
00:13:09,492 --> 00:13:11,494
Let me have a try.
175
00:13:20,046 --> 00:13:21,631
Pardon me, sir.
176
00:13:21,797 --> 00:13:25,801
- Could you give us some assistance, please?
-Yeah. Glad to help.
177
00:13:26,677 --> 00:13:28,763
We're looking for Dog Creek Road.
178
00:13:28,930 --> 00:13:30,848
That would be near the town of Redbud.
179
00:13:31,432 --> 00:13:35,353
If I was going to Dog Creek Road,
I sure as hell wouldn't start from here.
180
00:13:36,854 --> 00:13:38,356
But supposing you had to?
181
00:13:39,315 --> 00:13:42,526
Well, then I'd swing around and go back
the way you came.
182
00:13:42,693 --> 00:13:47,324
But this time, turn right
where the old Hollenshed barn used to be.
183
00:13:47,491 --> 00:13:52,162
Then about five miles
before the road dead-ends, veer left...
184
00:13:52,329 --> 00:13:56,541
...and follow the railroad tracks
straight into a town called Beaver Mills.
185
00:13:57,501 --> 00:14:03,256
Or you could take the bridge at the fork in
the road and save yourself a heap of time.
186
00:14:07,844 --> 00:14:10,556
But I wouldn't go that way if I were you.
187
00:14:24,237 --> 00:14:25,321
This ain't a bridge.
188
00:14:25,780 --> 00:14:28,574
-It's termites holding hands.
-We're going over it.
189
00:14:28,741 --> 00:14:31,244
Not me. I wouldn't go over this thing
on a skateboard.
190
00:14:31,411 --> 00:14:34,748
We're going over it. Have faith
in the craftsmanship of our forefathers.
191
00:14:34,915 --> 00:14:38,252
Your forefathers, not my forefathers.
192
00:14:40,087 --> 00:14:41,797
Oh, Lord.
193
00:14:49,638 --> 00:14:53,225
[CREAKING]
194
00:14:59,356 --> 00:15:01,568
This is insane. What are we doing, man?
195
00:15:01,735 --> 00:15:04,404
We're just movers.
That's all. We're just movers.
196
00:15:05,572 --> 00:15:07,198
No one gets paid for this shit.
197
00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:15,206
Go back, go back, go back!
198
00:15:16,666 --> 00:15:17,917
Go back, go back, go back.
199
00:15:18,460 --> 00:15:21,171
It's over. It's over, man.
200
00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:26,135
- Forefathers, my ass!
-Shut up. You're making me nervous.
201
00:16:07,135 --> 00:16:08,762
Any sign of them?
202
00:16:08,929 --> 00:16:10,388
Nope.
203
00:16:11,306 --> 00:16:14,184
I think it's gonna be a sneak attack.
204
00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:18,397
Where'd you get that?
205
00:16:19,273 --> 00:16:21,275
From the picnic basket.
206
00:16:21,442 --> 00:16:23,111
Anything else?
207
00:16:23,277 --> 00:16:27,031
No. This was the last of it.
One banana.
208
00:16:27,198 --> 00:16:30,118
- That's all. I'm sorry.
-No.
209
00:16:33,204 --> 00:16:34,872
I thought I saw an apple.
210
00:16:35,039 --> 00:16:38,292
Nope. Just this.
211
00:16:45,801 --> 00:16:47,427
CROCKER:
Mickey?
212
00:16:48,220 --> 00:16:51,140
MICKEY: Yeah.
CROCKER: You still got that map?
213
00:16:51,473 --> 00:16:53,725
MICKEY: Yeah.
CROCKER: Don't lose it.
214
00:16:53,892 --> 00:16:57,563
It might be the piece of evidence
that gets me off a murder charge.
215
00:16:58,147 --> 00:16:59,690
MICKEY:
Who you gonna kill, Crocker?
216
00:16:59,857 --> 00:17:02,359
CROCKER:
The son of a bitch who drew that map.
217
00:17:29,888 --> 00:17:32,098
[KNOCKING ON FLOOR]
218
00:17:35,102 --> 00:17:38,105
ELIZABETH: When they say
hardwood floors, what they really mean is...
219
00:17:38,272 --> 00:17:41,859
...hard, wood floors.
220
00:17:42,443 --> 00:17:45,988
ANDY: Oh, it's not so bad. It's warm
in here. We have a roof over our heads.
221
00:17:54,788 --> 00:17:57,541
Think about the settlers 200 years ago.
222
00:17:57,708 --> 00:18:00,462
They slept under the stars
and bathed in icy streams.
223
00:18:00,629 --> 00:18:03,924
And they lived to an average age of 29.
224
00:18:12,307 --> 00:18:14,226
Come here.
225
00:18:14,809 --> 00:18:16,645
Come here.
226
00:18:20,398 --> 00:18:24,694
Close your eyes
and try to get some sleep.
227
00:18:25,905 --> 00:18:29,992
[ELIZABETH HUMMING]
228
00:18:52,182 --> 00:18:54,351
[CRUNCHES]
229
00:19:06,029 --> 00:19:08,949
[CRUNCHING]
230
00:19:17,292 --> 00:19:20,169
[FLY BUZZING]
231
00:19:44,695 --> 00:19:46,238
Hey.
232
00:19:46,405 --> 00:19:48,198
[TRUCK APPROACHING]
233
00:19:48,365 --> 00:19:50,326
They're here.
234
00:19:50,743 --> 00:19:53,078
Be civil.
235
00:19:58,500 --> 00:20:01,003
Well, it's about time!
236
00:20:02,755 --> 00:20:04,423
Where the hell have you guys been?
237
00:20:04,590 --> 00:20:05,632
Oh, man.
238
00:20:05,799 --> 00:20:07,509
- You hear that?
-Didn't hear a thing.
239
00:20:07,676 --> 00:20:10,597
ANDY: I'll have somebody's ass for this!
-Perhaps you heard that.
240
00:20:10,764 --> 00:20:12,557
- Nope.
-You're a day late, damn it!
241
00:20:12,724 --> 00:20:16,311
We had to sleep on the floor last night!
Where the hell have you idiots been?
242
00:20:16,478 --> 00:20:19,606
- Or that?
-I don't know what to say. I'm at a loss.
243
00:20:19,773 --> 00:20:23,610
I have a contract. Says if you're late,
you get a rebate. Well, you guys are late.
244
00:20:23,777 --> 00:20:27,155
And I want more than a rebate.
I want a goddamn refund!
245
00:20:27,781 --> 00:20:29,115
Somebody answer me!
246
00:20:29,282 --> 00:20:31,576
- We got lost.
-Lost?
247
00:20:31,743 --> 00:20:35,456
How could you get lost?
I drew you a map!
248
00:20:39,126 --> 00:20:42,129
Okay. That's more like it.
249
00:20:43,881 --> 00:20:46,384
- Now we're getting somewhere.
-This one?
250
00:20:47,426 --> 00:20:49,303
Good choice.
251
00:20:50,096 --> 00:20:51,931
Follow me.
252
00:20:53,599 --> 00:20:55,226
Okay, that goes in my writing room.
253
00:20:55,476 --> 00:20:57,812
It's on the second floor,
last room on the left.
254
00:20:57,978 --> 00:21:00,649
That is top-quality leather.
Watch it going up the stairs.
255
00:21:00,816 --> 00:21:04,361
Also, we just had the floors done
so I don't want scratches and scrapes.
256
00:21:04,528 --> 00:21:07,280
Just take it easy on the floors, okay?
257
00:21:09,658 --> 00:21:10,784
Hey! Fella, hey!
258
00:21:11,243 --> 00:21:12,661
Wait!
259
00:21:12,828 --> 00:21:14,413
Stop!
260
00:21:21,128 --> 00:21:22,754
You slept on the floor, huh?
261
00:21:22,921 --> 00:21:26,801
We slept outside
with the bugs and the wild animals.
262
00:21:26,968 --> 00:21:28,845
A bridge nearly killed us.
263
00:21:29,011 --> 00:21:33,015
Nobody knows where the hell Redbud is.
And we haven't eaten since yesterday.
264
00:21:33,182 --> 00:21:37,103
So stay the hell out of our way
and keep your mouth shut!
265
00:21:40,606 --> 00:21:42,358
Sounds fair.
266
00:21:58,459 --> 00:22:01,086
[WATER SQUISHES]
267
00:22:04,006 --> 00:22:05,090
ELIZABETH:
How's it going?
268
00:22:05,841 --> 00:22:07,718
Fine. Great.
269
00:22:08,260 --> 00:22:10,220
ELIZABETH:
That's good.
270
00:22:13,348 --> 00:22:16,518
Well, back to work.
271
00:22:37,415 --> 00:22:39,501
[BIRD CHIRPING]
272
00:22:39,667 --> 00:22:41,586
[WHISTLING]
273
00:23:09,449 --> 00:23:10,450
Yeah.
274
00:23:33,014 --> 00:23:36,185
[SNORING]
275
00:23:50,825 --> 00:23:52,827
[THUDDING]
276
00:24:11,722 --> 00:24:13,223
ELIZABETH: Hey, Andy?
-What?
277
00:24:13,390 --> 00:24:15,017
Come down here, Andy! Hurry!
278
00:24:21,356 --> 00:24:23,859
[GRUNTING]
279
00:24:43,212 --> 00:24:44,881
ELIZABETH:
Andy?
280
00:24:45,923 --> 00:24:47,383
- Andy?
-What?
281
00:24:53,807 --> 00:24:55,851
- I found the phone.
-Good.
282
00:24:56,310 --> 00:24:59,271
Call the movers. I'm not spending
another night in this house.
283
00:24:59,688 --> 00:25:02,608
- Why? What happened?
-There's a coffin in the garden.
284
00:25:02,775 --> 00:25:05,402
- Operator.
ANDY: Sheriff's office, please.
285
00:25:05,569 --> 00:25:09,865
Yes, sir. I can connect you with the sheriff
if you will kindly deposit 20 cents.
286
00:25:10,532 --> 00:25:12,451
- This isn't a pay phone.
- Please, sir.
287
00:25:12,618 --> 00:25:16,455
Deposit 20 cents in the slot
and I'll complete your call as requested.
288
00:25:16,622 --> 00:25:20,377
You don't understand. This is Mr. Farmer.
We just moved into the Musselman place.
289
00:25:20,543 --> 00:25:23,171
You were supposed to install
a wall phone in the kitchen.
290
00:25:23,338 --> 00:25:26,341
Please, sir, just drop a couple of dimes
in the slot...
291
00:25:26,508 --> 00:25:29,302
...and I will happily complete your call
as requested.
292
00:25:29,469 --> 00:25:31,054
What slot? There is no slot.
293
00:25:31,221 --> 00:25:32,472
Haven't you been listening?
294
00:25:32,639 --> 00:25:37,102
This is not a pay phone! This is a goddamn
1948 table model with a 12" cord...
295
00:25:37,268 --> 00:25:39,437
...that some jackass put in my cabinet!
296
00:25:39,604 --> 00:25:43,567
Disconnect. Vulgar and abusive language,
that's an automatic disconnect.
297
00:25:47,154 --> 00:25:49,156
- Operator.
AN DY: Yes, hello.
298
00:25:49,323 --> 00:25:51,659
This is Dr. Grail from the...
299
00:25:51,826 --> 00:25:55,746
...Utilities Commission. May I speak with
the sheriff? We have a fire. It's urgent.
300
00:25:55,913 --> 00:25:57,998
Nice try, Mr. Farmer.
301
00:26:06,298 --> 00:26:07,758
Sheriff's office, please.
302
00:26:07,925 --> 00:26:10,637
You gotta get up earlier in the morning
than that, Farmer.
303
00:26:10,804 --> 00:26:15,684
I know the sound of two pennies being
dropped into a jelly jar when I hear it.
304
00:26:16,059 --> 00:26:18,395
Listen to me. This is Elizabeth Farmer.
305
00:26:18,562 --> 00:26:22,482
We have a corpse in the garden. Now
get ahold of the sheriff this very minute.
306
00:26:25,193 --> 00:26:26,820
DIRK:
Yup.
307
00:26:27,112 --> 00:26:28,447
That's a casket, all right.
308
00:26:28,613 --> 00:26:32,784
See? It's nothing to be upset about. It's out
of the ground. It'll be gone in a moment.
309
00:26:33,452 --> 00:26:35,079
What's this gonna cost me, fellas?
310
00:26:36,497 --> 00:26:40,042
Dirk, what is our charge
for excavating mortal remains?
311
00:26:40,209 --> 00:26:42,545
I guess we better bill them by the pound.
312
00:26:43,004 --> 00:26:44,380
Careful, boy.
313
00:26:44,964 --> 00:26:46,591
Don't look.
314
00:26:51,804 --> 00:26:52,972
Take a look at this.
315
00:27:00,271 --> 00:27:01,523
That's Claude Musselman.
316
00:27:01,690 --> 00:27:04,568
- I recognize the glass eye.
-I knew it.
317
00:27:04,735 --> 00:27:08,155
I knew Eula would get
the last word in somehow.
318
00:27:08,322 --> 00:27:09,823
What do you mean?
319
00:27:09,990 --> 00:27:15,037
Claude used to alley-cat around town
with a widow named Dorita Freeburger.
320
00:27:15,204 --> 00:27:17,581
When he died, he left the house to Eula...
321
00:27:17,748 --> 00:27:19,458
...and $10,000 to Dorita.
322
00:27:19,625 --> 00:27:22,544
I guess that made Eula mad enough
to stuff Claude in this...
323
00:27:22,711 --> 00:27:24,880
...cheap pine box
and plant him in the garden.
324
00:27:25,047 --> 00:27:27,842
Having the last word's
real important around here.
325
00:27:28,593 --> 00:27:32,889
Boys, take him over to the cemetery
and I'll see that he gets a proper burial.
326
00:27:33,056 --> 00:27:34,766
LON:
Right away.
327
00:27:35,225 --> 00:27:38,937
Ma'am, could I trouble you for
a shovel and some plastic GLAD Bags?
328
00:27:40,897 --> 00:27:43,024
I'll get them.
329
00:27:48,905 --> 00:27:50,365
AN DY:
Thanks for all your trouble.
330
00:27:50,532 --> 00:27:54,662
I'd say the worst is behind you now,
but be careful where you dig in the future.
331
00:27:54,829 --> 00:27:58,249
I believe Claude had a mule
that's still unaccounted for.
332
00:27:58,415 --> 00:28:00,292
AN DY:
Thanks for the tip.
333
00:28:00,751 --> 00:28:02,837
LEDBETTER:
Any other problems, just let me know.
334
00:28:03,003 --> 00:28:05,422
ANDY: No, I think that'll do it.
-No.
335
00:28:05,923 --> 00:28:08,509
No. No, it won't.
336
00:28:08,676 --> 00:28:13,514
Our mailman tried to run us down with his
truck and threw our mail out into the road.
337
00:28:13,681 --> 00:28:16,183
You're on Crum Petree's route,
aren't you?
338
00:28:16,517 --> 00:28:20,313
The problem is, your place is five miles
off his regular route.
339
00:28:20,480 --> 00:28:25,068
By the time he gets all the way out to here,
he's pretty well liquored up and pissed off.
340
00:28:25,235 --> 00:28:26,903
My advice is...
341
00:28:27,070 --> 00:28:28,613
...learn to live with it.
342
00:28:28,780 --> 00:28:33,410
- Well, I'll have a talk with him.
-Yes. You do that, Mr. Farmer.
343
00:28:33,577 --> 00:28:37,581
You two have yourselves a nice little chat.
Ike, let's go.
344
00:28:37,747 --> 00:28:39,207
Thank you, ma'am.
345
00:28:39,541 --> 00:28:42,085
Does the sheriff always ride around
in a taxi?
346
00:28:42,252 --> 00:28:44,630
Yup. Ever since he
flunked his driving test.
347
00:28:58,477 --> 00:29:01,314
ELIZABETH:
Andy, have we made a terrible mistake?
348
00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:02,565
AN DY:
Of course not.
349
00:29:07,153 --> 00:29:11,241
I know things haven't gone
completely according to plan so far.
350
00:29:11,408 --> 00:29:13,952
We just have to adjust our thinking.
351
00:29:14,286 --> 00:29:17,164
We didn't move here
for a change of scenery, did we?
352
00:29:18,206 --> 00:29:19,583
No.
353
00:29:19,750 --> 00:29:22,502
We moved here for a change of heart.
354
00:29:23,253 --> 00:29:26,506
But it's gonna take a little effort
on our parts.
355
00:29:28,383 --> 00:29:30,844
Come on, what do you say?
356
00:29:31,011 --> 00:29:32,638
Give it a chance.
357
00:29:33,180 --> 00:29:35,224
Okay.
358
00:29:36,017 --> 00:29:37,518
I'll make an effort.
359
00:29:37,685 --> 00:29:40,855
- I promise.
-Good.
360
00:29:45,401 --> 00:29:47,362
[CHIRPING]
361
00:30:01,210 --> 00:30:04,213
[WHISTLING]
362
00:30:05,214 --> 00:30:07,049
[BIRD SQUAWKS]
363
00:30:09,969 --> 00:30:13,555
[MUSIC PLAYING OVER HEADPHONES]
364
00:30:21,480 --> 00:30:23,983
I'm gonna do a little fishing.
365
00:30:24,149 --> 00:30:26,277
[WHISTLES]
366
00:30:26,695 --> 00:30:27,946
I'm going fishing.
367
00:30:28,113 --> 00:30:30,532
- Done writing?
-I'm taking a break.
368
00:30:30,699 --> 00:30:33,868
I thought I'd try my luck at the pond,
maybe catch us some lunch.
369
00:30:34,035 --> 00:30:36,037
Great. Have fun.
370
00:30:36,496 --> 00:30:38,331
How are you doing?
371
00:30:40,542 --> 00:30:41,918
[WHISTLES]
372
00:30:42,335 --> 00:30:45,547
- How are you doing?
-Me? I'm doing great.
373
00:30:45,714 --> 00:30:48,174
I love the country.
374
00:30:56,183 --> 00:30:57,268
Sorry, fellas.
375
00:31:05,443 --> 00:31:06,819
Hey, honey?
376
00:31:07,737 --> 00:31:09,780
I got one.
377
00:31:11,449 --> 00:31:13,117
Where you going? Where you going?
378
00:31:13,284 --> 00:31:14,618
You wanna fight, do you?
379
00:31:17,455 --> 00:31:18,832
Christ! Get it off!
380
00:31:18,999 --> 00:31:21,501
Get-- Elizabeth! Elizabeth!
381
00:31:21,668 --> 00:31:23,045
[YELLING]
382
00:31:23,211 --> 00:31:26,381
It's caught on me! Elizabeth!
383
00:31:46,819 --> 00:31:48,571
Oh, no.
384
00:31:50,239 --> 00:31:51,699
Honey.
385
00:31:51,866 --> 00:31:54,577
[ELIZABETH SCREAMS]
386
00:32:07,173 --> 00:32:11,970
It's all my fault. I've been so busy writing,
I didn't realize how cooped up you've been.
387
00:32:12,596 --> 00:32:15,808
We're gonna get out
and make some friends, circulate.
388
00:32:15,974 --> 00:32:18,268
Become part of the community.
389
00:32:18,435 --> 00:32:20,062
Hm?
390
00:32:20,229 --> 00:32:22,689
- I guess.
-That's a girl.
391
00:32:24,942 --> 00:32:26,860
"Founder's Day picnic. Softball."
392
00:32:27,027 --> 00:32:28,320
Sounds like fun.
393
00:32:28,487 --> 00:32:30,447
- Wanna go?
-Don't think so.
394
00:32:38,123 --> 00:32:39,833
There's an antique store.
395
00:32:40,375 --> 00:32:43,711
"Ethel Dinges Antiques."
Let's take a look.
396
00:32:55,890 --> 00:32:58,226
Hon, you know you don't enjoy
this sort of thing.
397
00:32:58,393 --> 00:33:01,564
- You go to the ball game. I'll find you later.
-No, I don't mind.
398
00:33:01,730 --> 00:33:03,858
[CROWD CHEERING]
399
00:33:04,024 --> 00:33:07,194
Well, okay.
400
00:33:07,361 --> 00:33:08,863
- Here, you keep the car.
-Okay.
401
00:33:09,029 --> 00:33:10,656
- Take your time.
-All right.
402
00:33:10,823 --> 00:33:13,325
- See you at the picnic.
-Okay.
403
00:33:25,296 --> 00:33:27,090
- Here you go. Thank you.
-Thanks.
404
00:33:27,257 --> 00:33:29,467
Two hot dogs, please.
405
00:33:31,511 --> 00:33:34,055
BOY 1: You might as well pay.
BOY 2: I'll beat you.
406
00:33:34,222 --> 00:33:37,309
[CHATTERING]
407
00:33:40,604 --> 00:33:42,314
MAN 1:
Go, go, go.
408
00:33:42,772 --> 00:33:46,401
- Yeah!
-Let's get them, Redbud.
409
00:33:52,700 --> 00:33:55,870
MAN 2:
Come on, let's go. One more.
410
00:33:56,037 --> 00:33:57,246
Good job, Redbud.
411
00:33:57,413 --> 00:34:00,791
MAN 3: All right.
-Second base.
412
00:34:01,751 --> 00:34:02,877
Let's get the batter up.
413
00:34:12,970 --> 00:34:14,013
Play ball!
414
00:34:16,807 --> 00:34:18,352
Strike!
415
00:34:20,103 --> 00:34:22,272
Lotterhand, what day is it?
416
00:34:22,439 --> 00:34:23,899
Come on, Redbud!
417
00:34:28,612 --> 00:34:30,280
Strike!
418
00:34:32,658 --> 00:34:34,409
Here we go.
419
00:34:34,576 --> 00:34:36,912
Come on. Put it in there.
420
00:34:38,872 --> 00:34:39,998
All right. Yeah.
421
00:34:40,165 --> 00:34:41,792
I got it.
422
00:34:43,168 --> 00:34:44,462
Strike three.
423
00:34:48,383 --> 00:34:50,009
Gee. Sorry, Marion.
424
00:34:50,176 --> 00:34:52,637
Run, you idiot, run!
He dropped the third strike!
425
00:34:52,804 --> 00:34:54,472
Somebody pick up the ball!
426
00:34:54,847 --> 00:34:56,808
Somebody get the ball!
427
00:34:57,475 --> 00:35:00,186
What the hell is this?
Gus called three strikes.
428
00:35:00,353 --> 00:35:02,522
WOMAN:
Somebody pick up the damn ball!
429
00:35:07,193 --> 00:35:08,361
Safe!
430
00:35:08,528 --> 00:35:10,656
MAN 1: What's the matter with you,
are you blind?
431
00:35:12,074 --> 00:35:15,119
GUS: I call them as I see them.
MAN 2: He's got the ball here--
432
00:35:15,286 --> 00:35:16,912
GUS:
Get an ambulance.
433
00:35:17,997 --> 00:35:21,375
WOMAN: If you have any questions,
feel free to ask.
434
00:35:22,918 --> 00:35:24,920
- This is nice.
-isn't it, though?
435
00:35:25,087 --> 00:35:27,881
That belonged to my sister.
436
00:35:28,299 --> 00:35:29,341
She's dead.
437
00:35:31,385 --> 00:35:32,761
Oh, sorry.
438
00:35:32,928 --> 00:35:34,638
We were very close.
439
00:35:34,889 --> 00:35:38,601
This cup is all I have to remember her by.
440
00:35:39,227 --> 00:35:42,439
Everything else was lost in the explosion.
441
00:35:49,654 --> 00:35:52,699
This is perfect.
How much are you asking?
442
00:35:52,866 --> 00:35:57,078
That belonged to my husband.
It was his favorite chair.
443
00:35:57,245 --> 00:36:00,165
He would come home
from a hard day on the railroad...
444
00:36:00,332 --> 00:36:04,211
...and just rock and rock.
445
00:36:04,378 --> 00:36:08,257
I can almost see him in it now.
I don't believe...
446
00:36:08,424 --> 00:36:10,843
...a soul has sat in that chair...
447
00:36:11,010 --> 00:36:13,471
...since the day his heart attacked him.
448
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:20,519
WOMAN: It'll be all right.
BOY: Ma, is he dead?
449
00:36:29,112 --> 00:36:31,239
[SIREN WAILING]
450
00:36:32,032 --> 00:36:35,327
Well, that's that.
Forget the fishing derby, boys.
451
00:36:35,494 --> 00:36:37,788
- How come?
-Without Marion, we're a man short.
452
00:36:37,954 --> 00:36:41,124
Rules say four men in a boat.
453
00:36:51,343 --> 00:36:52,929
ANDY:
I'm glad to help out, fellas.
454
00:36:53,304 --> 00:36:55,306
I hope this won't take too long.
455
00:36:55,473 --> 00:36:58,226
My wife's gonna come down-- Ah!
456
00:37:00,770 --> 00:37:02,814
Hey!
457
00:37:04,023 --> 00:37:05,608
Hey!
458
00:37:09,987 --> 00:37:12,824
You must be new to Redbud.
459
00:37:13,408 --> 00:37:15,118
Just moved up from New York.
460
00:37:15,284 --> 00:37:17,537
How do you like it so far?
461
00:37:17,703 --> 00:37:20,332
Oh, it's lovely.
462
00:37:22,167 --> 00:37:25,671
No, that's not true. It's just awful.
463
00:37:30,968 --> 00:37:34,346
Everything just seems to be going wrong.
464
00:37:36,515 --> 00:37:37,599
Bugs“.
465
00:37:37,766 --> 00:37:39,268
."Snakes“.
466
00:37:39,435 --> 00:37:42,855
-...dead bodies.
-Oh, dear.
467
00:37:44,065 --> 00:37:45,942
We had such high hopes.
468
00:37:46,109 --> 00:37:49,654
Of course you did. Of course you did.
469
00:37:49,821 --> 00:37:53,283
Everything will work out. You'll see.
470
00:37:53,700 --> 00:37:55,285
Why don't we sit down here...
471
00:37:55,452 --> 00:37:58,538
...and I'll make us a nice
cold pitcher of iced tea.
472
00:37:58,705 --> 00:38:00,123
No, I don't wanna trouble you.
473
00:38:00,290 --> 00:38:04,544
Nonsense. Now you sit down here
and I'll be right back.
474
00:38:09,592 --> 00:38:11,927
- Ah!
-What is it?
475
00:38:13,888 --> 00:38:16,599
He won't hurt you, dear. He's stuffed.
476
00:38:18,225 --> 00:38:20,269
He-- He just startled me, that's all.
477
00:38:20,436 --> 00:38:22,605
- I'll take him away.
- No,no.
478
00:38:22,771 --> 00:38:24,690
No, I'm all right now.
479
00:38:25,024 --> 00:38:27,234
I'll be right back.
480
00:38:57,432 --> 00:38:58,934
Oh, boy.
481
00:39:12,782 --> 00:39:13,950
[YELLS]
482
00:39:14,116 --> 00:39:16,035
Jesus, Brock, I'm sorry!
483
00:39:16,577 --> 00:39:18,162
ANDY: What happened?
-I hooked his neck.
484
00:39:18,329 --> 00:39:21,541
No, don't pull on it.
You'll rip his damn veins out.
485
00:39:21,707 --> 00:39:22,833
He'll bleed to death.
486
00:39:23,000 --> 00:39:25,086
Take it easy. You're just making it worse.
487
00:39:25,253 --> 00:39:27,214
- Let me see it!
-Stay away from me.
488
00:39:27,381 --> 00:39:30,300
- We gotta get the hook out. Hold still!
-Get away! Get away!
489
00:39:30,467 --> 00:39:32,678
- You've got to hold still!
-Get away from me!
490
00:39:33,011 --> 00:39:34,388
- Gotta knock him out.
-What?
491
00:39:34,555 --> 00:39:36,598
It's the only way to get the hooks out.
492
00:39:37,432 --> 00:39:39,601
Sorry, Brock, it's for your own good.
493
00:39:39,768 --> 00:39:41,520
Will you cut that out?
494
00:39:43,689 --> 00:39:45,440
- You bastard!
HANK: It's not working.
495
00:39:45,607 --> 00:39:48,193
You're not knocking him out,
you're beating him up.
496
00:39:48,360 --> 00:39:49,861
- Sons of bitches!
-Hold still!
497
00:39:50,028 --> 00:39:52,949
- He sure is tough.
-Somebody else take a swing.
498
00:39:53,116 --> 00:39:55,535
I only hooked him in the neck,
I'm not trying to kill him.
499
00:39:55,702 --> 00:39:57,287
[REEL WHIRRING]
500
00:39:57,453 --> 00:39:59,998
- Help me pull his hands away from his face.
-Hey, I got a strike.
501
00:40:00,164 --> 00:40:01,958
I'm gonna kill you for this.
502
00:40:02,792 --> 00:40:05,336
I'm sorry, Brock.
It's for your own good.
503
00:40:06,588 --> 00:40:07,839
[YELLS]
504
00:40:08,715 --> 00:40:10,717
Oh, Jesus. Fellas, I'm sorry!
505
00:40:15,305 --> 00:40:17,181
That's cold.
506
00:40:17,599 --> 00:40:20,185
Hey, look.
507
00:40:20,352 --> 00:40:21,937
It fell out.
508
00:40:23,397 --> 00:40:24,857
- No need to thank me.
-Grab him.
509
00:40:25,024 --> 00:40:27,776
- I was only trying to help.
-He's mine.
510
00:40:27,943 --> 00:40:30,195
If you come to get me, I'll be ready!
511
00:40:30,362 --> 00:40:32,865
I don't work! I don't sleep!
512
00:40:34,366 --> 00:40:35,993
Damn.
513
00:41:03,396 --> 00:41:05,649
LEDBETTER:
Mrs. Farmer? Mrs. Farmer?
514
00:41:05,815 --> 00:41:10,571
I've been looking for you, Mrs. Farmer.
Can I speak to you for a minute?
515
00:41:15,826 --> 00:41:18,412
I got something here for you,
Mrs. Farmer.
516
00:41:18,663 --> 00:41:20,081
Try again tomorrow, sheriff?
517
00:41:20,581 --> 00:41:23,042
Hello, sheriff. What is it?
518
00:41:23,209 --> 00:41:25,628
The bill for Claude Musselman's funeral.
519
00:41:29,757 --> 00:41:31,300
Four thousand dollars?
520
00:41:31,467 --> 00:41:36,056
I'd call it a bargain. He got the most
scenic plot in Memorial Cemetery.
521
00:41:36,223 --> 00:41:39,976
For $4,000, we could have had him
stuffed and mounted over the fireplace.
522
00:41:40,143 --> 00:41:43,689
I thought you'd wanna give him
the best burial money could buy.
523
00:41:43,855 --> 00:41:46,608
Frankly, I don't see how any of this
is our respons--
524
00:42:10,258 --> 00:42:13,636
- Can we discuss this some other time?
-If you like.
525
00:42:14,804 --> 00:42:17,765
I'll take it up with my husband
the moment he dries out.
526
00:42:18,141 --> 00:42:20,601
Just remember, Mrs. Farmer,
when you buy a house...
527
00:42:21,144 --> 00:42:25,189
...what's in the ground belongs to you,
whether it's gold or oil...
528
00:42:25,356 --> 00:42:27,317
...or Claude Musselman.
529
00:42:43,876 --> 00:42:46,545
- You wanna talk about it?
-No.
530
00:42:47,671 --> 00:42:49,965
Then take a look at this.
531
00:43:02,061 --> 00:43:03,730
Four thousand dollars?
532
00:43:03,897 --> 00:43:06,107
It's itemized.
533
00:43:07,484 --> 00:43:13,239
"One satin-lined casket, $2525?
534
00:43:15,033 --> 00:43:19,079
One Italian marble headstone, $1,200?
535
00:43:19,538 --> 00:43:22,208
Reverend Cobb's sermon, one--
536
00:43:22,374 --> 00:43:24,835
Traffic control"?
537
00:43:25,586 --> 00:43:28,380
What? What?
538
00:43:30,549 --> 00:43:33,260
So such for getting out
and making friends.
539
00:43:35,805 --> 00:43:37,973
Hey, wait. Stop, go back.
540
00:43:38,140 --> 00:43:39,725
Go back.
541
00:43:44,981 --> 00:43:48,068
If I can't make a friend,
I'll goddamn buy one.
542
00:44:08,922 --> 00:44:12,510
We're home, boy. Out you go.
543
00:44:13,386 --> 00:44:15,263
[BARKING]
544
00:44:22,103 --> 00:44:24,105
Hey, hey. Get away from those ducks.
545
00:44:28,526 --> 00:44:30,361
Hell of a dog.
546
00:44:33,072 --> 00:44:35,450
It sure likes to run.
547
00:44:39,246 --> 00:44:41,665
Yo! Hey!
548
00:44:42,124 --> 00:44:43,458
Dog!
549
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:47,379
Hey! Hey!
550
00:44:47,754 --> 00:44:50,591
Come back! Dog!
551
00:44:51,675 --> 00:44:52,885
[WHISTLES]
552
00:44:53,051 --> 00:44:55,804
Come on! Come!
553
00:44:56,680 --> 00:44:57,973
Ah!
554
00:45:01,895 --> 00:45:03,563
Stay here.
555
00:45:03,730 --> 00:45:06,566
Maybe our homeowner's policy
will cover it.
556
00:45:51,320 --> 00:45:55,367
- Well?
-Vanished without a trace.
557
00:45:56,034 --> 00:45:59,329
I must have covered 10 square miles.
558
00:45:59,913 --> 00:46:02,374
This has been one hell of a day.
559
00:46:03,208 --> 00:46:05,377
And it isn't over yet.
560
00:46:06,503 --> 00:46:09,339
They installed the kitchen phone
while we were gone.
561
00:46:09,506 --> 00:46:13,218
Well, thank God
something's gone right today.
562
00:46:15,428 --> 00:46:16,554
Does it work?
563
00:46:16,721 --> 00:46:20,059
- I don't know. I didn't try it.
-Why not?
564
00:46:23,312 --> 00:46:25,731
I didn't have any change.
565
00:46:40,913 --> 00:46:43,624
- Are you feeling better now?
-Yeah.
566
00:46:44,334 --> 00:46:46,545
- You?
-Yeah.
567
00:46:46,753 --> 00:46:49,840
- You wanna horse around?
-Yeah.
568
00:47:29,297 --> 00:47:31,466
[DOG BARKING]
569
00:47:33,843 --> 00:47:35,387
Hey.
570
00:47:35,554 --> 00:47:37,848
[WHISTLES]
571
00:47:39,141 --> 00:47:41,310
Hey! Dog!
572
00:47:47,649 --> 00:47:49,568
[HORN HONKING]
573
00:47:57,201 --> 00:47:59,828
[TRUCK BACKFIRING]
574
00:48:06,503 --> 00:48:08,296
[PETREE CACKLING]
575
00:48:10,340 --> 00:48:12,175
I'm not giving UP!
576
00:48:12,342 --> 00:48:15,637
You're not dealing
with some ignorant hick here!
577
00:48:41,872 --> 00:48:43,457
Heading south for the winter, eh?
578
00:48:51,882 --> 00:48:54,427
[GUNSHOTS]
579
00:49:01,560 --> 00:49:03,728
Welcome back, fellas.
580
00:49:05,063 --> 00:49:07,107
Oh, hold on one second.
581
00:49:16,158 --> 00:49:18,536
Are you there? Okay.
582
00:49:28,963 --> 00:49:31,340
[WHISTLING]
583
00:49:39,223 --> 00:49:41,309
You look beautiful.
584
00:49:41,475 --> 00:49:43,854
Happy anniversary.
585
00:49:45,647 --> 00:49:48,192
- Ready for a big night on the town?
-Mm-hm.
586
00:49:48,358 --> 00:49:50,777
But before we go,
I have something for you.
587
00:49:50,944 --> 00:49:53,947
So do I. It's right here.
588
00:49:54,865 --> 00:49:56,366
But I'm saving it for later.
589
00:49:57,201 --> 00:50:00,579
Mine's on the porch. You can have it now.
Close your eyes.
590
00:50:02,873 --> 00:50:03,916
Close your eyes.
591
00:50:05,626 --> 00:50:06,710
No peeking.
592
00:50:16,429 --> 00:50:19,057
Happy anniversary, sweetheart.
593
00:50:24,646 --> 00:50:26,147
Is it alive?
594
00:50:26,314 --> 00:50:27,941
[ELIZABETH LAUGHS]
595
00:50:28,107 --> 00:50:31,486
This one's guaranteed not to run away.
596
00:50:31,653 --> 00:50:33,738
What's his name?
597
00:50:33,905 --> 00:50:35,491
That's up to you.
598
00:50:35,658 --> 00:50:38,160
Hello, Yellow Dog.
599
00:50:38,744 --> 00:50:42,456
He's beautiful. I love him. Thank you.
600
00:50:42,623 --> 00:50:45,334
ANDY: We could plant corn back there.
There's plenty of room.
601
00:50:45,501 --> 00:50:48,128
ELIZABETH: Or pumpkins.
ANDY: Pumpkins would be great.
602
00:50:48,295 --> 00:50:51,715
More lamb fries.
Eat them while they're hot.
603
00:50:51,882 --> 00:50:54,343
Andy, that's your third order.
604
00:50:55,344 --> 00:50:58,681
I am hooked, Elizabeth.
Call me Mr. Lamb Fries.
605
00:50:58,847 --> 00:51:02,185
Now there's a man who knows when
he's got something good in his mouth.
606
00:51:02,560 --> 00:51:07,065
You polish off that plate
and you'll break the record, 28.
607
00:51:07,232 --> 00:51:09,192
That one makes 26.
608
00:51:10,318 --> 00:51:12,904
Stand back, everybody.
The record falls tonight.
609
00:51:13,071 --> 00:51:14,322
Look at him go.
610
00:51:14,489 --> 00:51:17,534
I believe he's right.
I believe that record will fall tonight.
611
00:51:17,701 --> 00:51:21,079
- Twenty-seven.
-it's stood at 28 for nearly two years now.
612
00:51:21,246 --> 00:51:24,332
That long? Go for it, Andrew.
613
00:51:24,708 --> 00:51:26,836
- Twenty-eight.
-That's a tie.
614
00:51:35,261 --> 00:51:36,345
Twenty-nine!
615
00:51:36,512 --> 00:51:38,639
The new record!
616
00:51:40,433 --> 00:51:41,726
And he's still going.
617
00:51:42,226 --> 00:51:44,854
I thought that record
was gonna last forever.
618
00:51:45,104 --> 00:51:49,150
Most folks just don't seem to have
a taste for testicles no more.
619
00:51:49,317 --> 00:51:52,236
ELIZABETH: Testicles?
-Yes, ma'am. Sheep balls.
620
00:51:52,403 --> 00:51:53,488
[FORK CLATTERS]
621
00:51:53,655 --> 00:51:55,907
IVY: That's right.
-Tell him why yours is so tasty.
622
00:51:56,074 --> 00:52:00,329
Well, the trick is you've got to
clip them off way up high.
623
00:52:03,957 --> 00:52:08,211
Uh-oh. Looks like we got trouble here.
624
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:12,382
I knew you should've explained
these things better in the menu.
625
00:52:12,549 --> 00:52:14,217
Don't be strangers now, you hear?
626
00:52:26,647 --> 00:52:28,066
What is this?
627
00:52:28,232 --> 00:52:32,195
Oh, just part of your anniversary present.
628
00:52:35,406 --> 00:52:37,617
I thought we could use
a night away from home.
629
00:52:37,784 --> 00:52:39,410
ELIZABETH:
I didn't pack anything.
630
00:52:39,577 --> 00:52:41,496
I thought of that.
631
00:52:47,086 --> 00:52:49,129
You devil.
632
00:52:50,339 --> 00:52:54,343
- Are you sure you're feeling better now?
-Oh, fine. I feel great.
633
00:53:04,144 --> 00:53:06,897
This is so romantic.
634
00:53:19,369 --> 00:53:21,037
Why don't you make a fire?
635
00:53:21,329 --> 00:53:23,164
First...
636
00:53:26,960 --> 00:53:28,753
...open this.
637
00:53:31,381 --> 00:53:33,133
Go ahead, open it.
638
00:53:56,449 --> 00:54:00,202
It's my novel, Elizabeth. The Big Heist.
639
00:54:01,120 --> 00:54:03,373
The first few chapters, anyway.
640
00:54:03,540 --> 00:54:06,042
Oh, Andy.
641
00:54:06,334 --> 00:54:09,546
That manuscript is the whole reason
we moved to the country.
642
00:54:09,713 --> 00:54:11,882
It's good? You really think it's good?
643
00:54:12,048 --> 00:54:15,010
Well, read it and tell me.
644
00:54:17,387 --> 00:54:19,556
Now? Tonight?
645
00:54:20,307 --> 00:54:22,267
Yes, of course.
646
00:54:23,310 --> 00:54:25,187
What, with you watching me'?
647
00:54:25,353 --> 00:54:28,232
Well, I'll make a fire and you read.
648
00:54:33,070 --> 00:54:34,071
Honey.
649
00:54:34,238 --> 00:54:36,824
Go ahead. Read. Read.
650
00:55:18,993 --> 00:55:20,620
You're not laughing.
651
00:55:22,121 --> 00:55:23,665
You didn't find that funny?
652
00:55:23,831 --> 00:55:26,793
- What, you mean the first page?
-Yeah.
653
00:55:27,168 --> 00:55:29,921
There are at least three big laughs
on that page alone.
654
00:55:30,505 --> 00:55:31,631
Look at this guy's name.
655
00:55:31,798 --> 00:55:33,216
[LAUGHS]
656
00:55:34,008 --> 00:55:38,513
- Andy.
-I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
657
00:55:38,680 --> 00:55:40,848
Read the next page. It gets funnier.
658
00:55:41,015 --> 00:55:42,850
Is this a comedy?
659
00:55:43,476 --> 00:55:45,896
I thought it was, you know,
action-adventure.
660
00:55:46,063 --> 00:55:48,357
It is. It's all three.
661
00:55:48,732 --> 00:55:51,235
Read. It's great. Read.
662
00:56:05,040 --> 00:56:06,834
[ANDY LAUGHING]
663
00:56:07,001 --> 00:56:10,589
Andy, honey, let me read this at home.
I can't-- I can't even--
664
00:56:10,755 --> 00:56:13,842
I'm sorry. I know.
You can't read while I'm here.
665
00:56:14,009 --> 00:56:16,636
- I'll tell you what.
- Where are you going?
666
00:56:17,178 --> 00:56:21,850
Well, I saw a liquor store on the corner.
I'll buy some champagne, we can celebrate.
667
00:56:22,017 --> 00:56:25,312
- But...
-You just stay here and read.
668
00:56:26,313 --> 00:56:28,023
I love you.
669
00:57:26,249 --> 00:57:29,587
Wait. Wait, don't tell me yet.
670
00:58:00,452 --> 00:58:04,123
Okay, I'm ready. What'd you think?
671
00:58:10,921 --> 00:58:13,465
[SOBBING]
672
00:58:18,220 --> 00:58:20,473
I guess that means you don't like it.
673
00:58:23,852 --> 00:58:25,562
You think it's lousy?
674
00:58:28,773 --> 00:58:29,816
The whole thing?
675
00:58:29,983 --> 00:58:34,487
It's all those flashbacks. You never know
when anything is taking place.
676
00:58:34,654 --> 00:58:38,700
In the first 20 pages alone, I counted
three flashbacks, one flash-forward...
677
00:58:38,867 --> 00:58:41,995
...and I think on Page 8
you have a flash-sideways.
678
00:58:43,788 --> 00:58:45,416
Well, what about the story?
679
00:58:47,126 --> 00:58:48,627
The story?
680
00:58:49,462 --> 00:58:52,506
Yeah. Four poker buddies
knocking over a casino.
681
00:58:52,673 --> 00:58:54,967
The perfect crime.
682
00:58:57,178 --> 00:59:00,765
What are you saying I should do? Take out
the flashbacks? Rewrite the opening?
683
00:59:00,931 --> 00:59:02,683
I could do that.
684
00:59:04,268 --> 00:59:05,811
Then what?
685
00:59:05,978 --> 00:59:07,313
Burn it.
686
00:59:09,190 --> 00:59:11,526
You don't know what the hell
you're talking about.
687
00:59:11,693 --> 00:59:13,028
Thanks.
688
00:59:13,195 --> 00:59:17,282
You don't know a damn thing about writing.
You're a schoolteacher, not an editor.
689
00:59:17,449 --> 00:59:20,035
That's obvious. I read the whole thing.
690
00:59:20,202 --> 00:59:23,371
An editor would have stopped reading
after the first paragraph.
691
00:59:24,498 --> 00:59:28,335
Okay. You want me to burn it? Is that
what you want? You want me to burn it?
692
00:59:28,502 --> 00:59:31,671
There. I hope you're happy, Mrs. Critic!
693
00:59:31,838 --> 00:59:33,215
It's burning now, okay?
694
00:59:33,799 --> 00:59:35,217
It's burning!
695
00:59:35,383 --> 00:59:36,886
Shit!
696
00:59:37,303 --> 00:59:39,555
Oh, goddamn it.
697
00:59:41,766 --> 00:59:44,393
Ow, ow, ow.
698
00:59:45,061 --> 00:59:47,063
[SAWING]
699
00:59:50,483 --> 00:59:53,486
I'm sorry about the way
I behaved last night.
700
00:59:54,737 --> 00:59:57,156
You were just being honest.
701
00:59:58,282 --> 01:00:02,955
And it's encouraged me to try harder
and do better. For that, I thank you.
702
01:00:03,580 --> 01:00:05,749
Oh, Andy.
703
01:00:12,422 --> 01:00:15,509
[CRASHING]
704
01:00:15,676 --> 01:00:17,094
Think we should put this back?
705
01:00:17,261 --> 01:00:21,306
What, are you nuts? This sign is mint.
There's not a bullet hole in it.
706
01:00:37,991 --> 01:00:39,701
[HORN HONKING]
707
01:00:47,292 --> 01:00:50,128
Andy. Andy, honey.
708
01:00:51,880 --> 01:00:53,966
[PETREE CACKLING]
709
01:00:57,803 --> 01:01:00,472
Save your strength, sweetheart.
I'll get the mail.
710
01:01:21,119 --> 01:01:23,163
[SCREAMS]
711
01:01:27,459 --> 01:01:29,836
ELIZABETH: You want anything else?
How about some apple pie?
712
01:01:30,003 --> 01:01:34,299
No, thanks. I'm just gonna sit here
by the fire and relax.
713
01:01:34,799 --> 01:01:36,968
ELIZABETH: Well, can I bring you
a cup of coffee, then?
714
01:01:37,135 --> 01:01:39,095
[SNIFFING]
715
01:01:39,262 --> 01:01:41,806
All right. Good.
716
01:01:48,564 --> 01:01:51,525
[SIZZLING]
717
01:02:06,123 --> 01:02:08,209
Here we go.
718
01:02:09,210 --> 01:02:11,380
Hot. Hot.
719
01:02:13,173 --> 01:02:15,092
Here, honey.
720
01:02:16,051 --> 01:02:17,886
Thank you.
721
01:02:22,182 --> 01:02:23,475
I have good news, Andy.
722
01:02:23,642 --> 01:02:27,062
You do? Well, let's hear it.
I'm always in the mood for good news.
723
01:02:29,815 --> 01:02:31,066
Look.
724
01:02:33,026 --> 01:02:35,112
A check for $5,000 made out to you?
725
01:02:35,278 --> 01:02:37,740
Isn't it wonderful? I sold a book.
726
01:02:38,533 --> 01:02:39,575
What book?
727
01:02:39,909 --> 01:02:41,911
A book I wrote.
728
01:02:42,745 --> 01:02:45,456
Five thousand,
is that much for a first book?
729
01:02:46,165 --> 01:02:47,417
When did you write a book?
730
01:02:48,376 --> 01:02:52,296
Well, at odd times. You know,
a little bit here, a little bit there.
731
01:02:52,463 --> 01:02:54,424
I wrote it out longhand on legal pads.
732
01:02:54,590 --> 01:02:57,844
Then I Federal Expressed it to an address
I found in your magazine.
733
01:02:58,011 --> 01:03:01,097
And then today when I collected the mail,
there was an envelope...
734
01:03:01,264 --> 01:03:03,600
...and in it was a contract, a check...
735
01:03:03,767 --> 01:03:07,604
...and a typed version of my manuscript.
736
01:03:09,982 --> 01:03:12,568
- I can hardly believe it.
-Me too.
737
01:03:12,735 --> 01:03:15,446
The publisher wants to know
if I have any others.
738
01:03:15,612 --> 01:03:18,699
- You wrote a book and then you sold it?
-Yeah.
739
01:03:18,866 --> 01:03:21,785
- Well, what's it about?
-Animals.
740
01:03:22,119 --> 01:03:25,039
- Squirrels, mostly.
-Squirrels?
741
01:03:25,247 --> 01:03:28,460
- What kind of book is that?
-A children's book.
742
01:03:29,461 --> 01:03:32,130
A children's book? Oh, a children's book.
743
01:03:32,505 --> 01:03:34,257
What did you think I wrote, a novel?
744
01:03:34,424 --> 01:03:37,552
I didn't know. That's wonderful.
Congratulations.
745
01:03:37,719 --> 01:03:41,056
- Oh, thank you.
-I'm so proud of you. That's wonderful.
746
01:03:41,222 --> 01:03:44,100
- Are you, honey? Are you really?
-Of course.
747
01:03:44,267 --> 01:03:48,354
Because I thought you might feel
a little bit jealous or threatened.
748
01:03:48,521 --> 01:03:50,899
Me? Are you kidding?
749
01:03:52,067 --> 01:03:54,570
So tell me, these squirrels,
do they have adventures?
750
01:03:54,737 --> 01:03:56,447
Oh, yeah. It's so great.
751
01:03:56,614 --> 01:04:00,326
It's about a squirrel from Central Park
who falls asleep in a delivery truck...
752
01:04:00,493 --> 01:04:03,162
...and wakes up in the country.
753
01:04:03,329 --> 01:04:07,500
He has some funny misadventures
and he makes all kinds of mistakes...
754
01:04:07,666 --> 01:04:10,461
...because he's from the city, right...
755
01:04:10,628 --> 01:04:13,255
...and now he's completely
out of his element.
756
01:04:15,633 --> 01:04:17,343
It's a fish-out-of-water story.
757
01:04:19,721 --> 01:04:21,389
This squirrel is me, isn't it?
758
01:04:21,681 --> 01:04:24,601
No. No, I wouldn't say that.
759
01:04:25,519 --> 01:04:26,853
What's his name?
760
01:04:28,939 --> 01:04:30,023
Andy.
761
01:04:31,691 --> 01:04:33,026
I'm a son of a bitch.
762
01:04:33,193 --> 01:04:37,030
No, honey. Please don't be upset.
It's really very flattering.
763
01:04:37,197 --> 01:04:41,243
You were my inspiration.
This is a tribute to you.
764
01:04:42,577 --> 01:04:45,123
- I'd like to read it.
-And you shall.
765
01:04:45,289 --> 01:04:47,041
You shall.
766
01:04:47,708 --> 01:04:49,335
Oh, and one more thing.
767
01:04:50,586 --> 01:04:54,090
Would you mind, Andy, if I used
the typewriter for a little bit tonight?
768
01:04:54,257 --> 01:04:59,220
I have some ideas for a second story I wanna
get down before they fly out of my head.
769
01:04:59,387 --> 01:05:00,972
Oh, sure.
770
01:05:01,139 --> 01:05:04,767
It'll go much faster on the typewriter.
That is, if you don't mind, of course.
771
01:05:04,934 --> 01:05:06,686
ANDY:
Okay, let me straighten up a little.
772
01:05:21,410 --> 01:05:25,080
You know, I'm starting to enjoy the idea
of both of us being writers.
773
01:05:25,706 --> 01:05:27,916
It's in the great tradition of...
774
01:05:28,834 --> 01:05:30,711
...what's-his-name and his wife.
775
01:05:36,801 --> 01:05:38,094
Where'd you get that?
776
01:05:38,261 --> 01:05:39,762
ELIZABETH:
Mrs. Dinges' antique shop.
777
01:05:39,929 --> 01:05:43,141
He's what gave me the idea
to write the book in the first place.
778
01:05:43,308 --> 01:05:45,393
I thought I was your inspiration.
779
01:05:45,560 --> 01:05:48,313
It was the combination of the two.
780
01:05:48,479 --> 01:05:51,149
What I did, Andy,
was use the entire town.
781
01:05:51,316 --> 01:05:54,277
There's a great big old hedgehog
based on Sheriff Ledbetter.
782
01:05:54,444 --> 01:05:57,530
There's two crazy raccoons that remind me
of those Criterion brothers.
783
01:05:57,697 --> 01:05:59,282
Ooh! Remember that strange man--?
784
01:05:59,449 --> 01:06:02,912
But the squirrel, Andy,
he's the main character, isn't he?
785
01:06:03,454 --> 01:06:05,789
Well, yes, of course.
786
01:06:07,791 --> 01:06:12,755
So, what kind of cute things will old
Andy the squirrel be up to in the next book?
787
01:06:12,922 --> 01:06:16,967
- Maybe you should read the manuscript first.
-I will, I will.
788
01:06:17,134 --> 01:06:19,803
I was just wondering
what's in store for Andy next.
789
01:06:19,970 --> 01:06:22,723
Well, actually, he doesn't make it
into the second book.
790
01:06:24,350 --> 01:06:25,392
Why not?
791
01:06:25,559 --> 01:06:28,730
He gets run over by a truck
at the end of the first book.
792
01:06:47,666 --> 01:06:51,002
[TYPING]
793
01:07:42,681 --> 01:07:45,310
[MATTRESS SQUEAKS]
794
01:07:45,893 --> 01:07:48,813
Do you have any idea what time it is?
795
01:07:50,064 --> 01:07:52,275
[TYPING IN DISTANCE]
796
01:07:59,282 --> 01:08:02,744
[THUNDER CRASHES]
797
01:08:05,621 --> 01:08:07,915
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
798
01:08:14,131 --> 01:08:16,216
All right. All right. Okay.
799
01:08:18,427 --> 01:08:20,262
Shovel it.
800
01:08:27,603 --> 01:08:30,064
Let's see Memorial Cemetery bill me now.
801
01:08:38,239 --> 01:08:40,075
Thanks, fellas.
802
01:08:41,493 --> 01:08:43,787
- See you tomorrow.
-Okay, Andy.
803
01:08:43,953 --> 01:08:45,538
Thanks, boss.
804
01:08:45,955 --> 01:08:47,999
Come on, come on.
805
01:09:15,820 --> 01:09:18,406
It's 1:00 in the afternoon, Andy.
806
01:09:20,282 --> 01:09:23,536
I'm taking the truck into town.
I need some supplies.
807
01:09:23,702 --> 01:09:26,497
And I wanna drop in on Mrs. Dinges.
808
01:09:29,960 --> 01:09:31,753
What's going on, Andy?
809
01:09:31,920 --> 01:09:33,839
Is this what you wanna do with your life?
810
01:09:34,005 --> 01:09:38,051
Sleep all day long and hang out
with the Criterion brothers?
811
01:09:40,262 --> 01:09:43,348
You're sinking into a pit of self-pity,
defeatism and alcohol...
812
01:09:43,515 --> 01:09:45,475
...and you're enjoying it.
813
01:09:48,228 --> 01:09:50,439
You'll see me when you see me.
814
01:10:27,603 --> 01:10:28,729
Come on. Come on.
815
01:10:28,896 --> 01:10:30,189
[HORN HONKING]
816
01:10:30,355 --> 01:10:31,482
Come on.
817
01:10:34,568 --> 01:10:35,986
Shit.
818
01:10:41,116 --> 01:10:42,659
[TIRES SQUEAL]
819
01:10:43,702 --> 01:10:45,705
What the hell do you think you're doing?
820
01:10:46,039 --> 01:10:49,292
Are you nuts?
What were you honking at?
821
01:10:49,584 --> 01:10:52,587
- Are you Mr. Farmer? Mr. Andy Farmer?
-What?
822
01:10:52,754 --> 01:10:54,047
Yes, I am. Why?
823
01:10:54,214 --> 01:10:56,966
We've been trying to contact you
for some time, Mr. Farmer.
824
01:10:57,133 --> 01:10:58,551
My name is Michael Sinclair.
825
01:10:58,718 --> 01:10:59,802
[HORN HONKING]
826
01:10:59,969 --> 01:11:01,971
Wait. Shut up a minute. Listen.
827
01:11:02,138 --> 01:11:04,015
Shit. Give me a hand with this.
828
01:11:06,643 --> 01:11:10,356
Come on! Get over here and push. Now!
829
01:11:14,985 --> 01:11:17,530
May I ask what the point of this is?
830
01:11:17,738 --> 01:11:20,115
Just keep pushing. You'll see.
831
01:11:24,286 --> 01:11:26,413
- Hurry up, he's coming.
-Yes.
832
01:11:26,580 --> 01:11:28,374
Who? Who's coming?
833
01:11:28,541 --> 01:11:30,125
Okay, this is good.
834
01:11:30,292 --> 01:11:33,546
- Hold it steady till I say.
-I don't think I can hold it much longer.
835
01:11:33,712 --> 01:11:36,466
Sure you can. Sure you can.
836
01:11:36,883 --> 01:11:38,593
- You're doing just fine.
-Mr. Farmer.
837
01:11:38,760 --> 01:11:40,804
May I know what we're doing?
838
01:11:40,971 --> 01:11:43,223
- When I give you the signal, let it go.
-But Mr. Farmer--
839
01:11:43,390 --> 01:11:45,141
Shh! Quiet.
840
01:11:47,269 --> 01:11:48,937
- Now! Let it go.
-I can't.
841
01:11:49,104 --> 01:11:52,732
- Now, goddamn it!
-I can't! I can't! I can't!
842
01:11:55,569 --> 01:11:58,029
[PETREE CACKLING]
843
01:11:59,322 --> 01:12:00,865
Shit!
844
01:12:05,079 --> 01:12:07,206
We could have nailed him.
845
01:12:07,373 --> 01:12:09,083
We could have had him dead center.
846
01:12:15,423 --> 01:12:18,676
- Who are you anyway?
-I told you who I was.
847
01:12:18,843 --> 01:12:20,428
I'm Michael Sinclair.
848
01:12:21,637 --> 01:12:23,931
From Hufnagel and...
849
01:12:24,098 --> 01:12:27,561
...Brown. Your publisher, Mr. Farmer.
850
01:12:27,728 --> 01:12:31,189
- What are you doing here?
-Your deadline, the first installment.
851
01:12:31,356 --> 01:12:34,818
- Deadline?
-Three weeks ago, actually.
852
01:12:34,985 --> 01:12:38,739
We didn't hear from you.
Mr. Farmer, our letters went unanswered.
853
01:12:38,905 --> 01:12:44,036
Look, I know all of this must seem crazy,
but you'll just have to trust me on this.
854
01:12:44,202 --> 01:12:47,706
There's absolutely nothing
out of the ordinary happening here.
855
01:12:47,873 --> 01:12:49,374
Yes.
856
01:12:53,546 --> 01:12:55,340
Sorry about your car.
857
01:12:56,215 --> 01:12:57,508
A rental?
858
01:12:57,675 --> 01:12:59,719
I just bought it.
859
01:12:59,886 --> 01:13:01,804
Let's just forget about the deadline.
860
01:13:01,971 --> 01:13:05,391
Return the advance money
and we'll call it even.
861
01:13:05,558 --> 01:13:08,978
What, give the money back?
I've been working.
862
01:13:09,145 --> 01:13:12,231
I've got stuff down on paper,
right in my house.
863
01:13:12,398 --> 01:13:15,318
Come up and look at it. It's great stuff.
864
01:13:46,393 --> 01:13:48,103
Here, take this.
865
01:13:48,561 --> 01:13:52,399
It's not the novel, but it shows
I've been working. I think you'll like it.
866
01:13:52,565 --> 01:13:53,942
Please take it.
867
01:13:54,359 --> 01:13:56,861
You'll be hearing from us, Mr. Farmer.
Good day.
868
01:14:13,170 --> 01:14:15,923
[PHONE RINGING]
869
01:14:23,723 --> 01:14:24,849
Hello?
870
01:14:25,015 --> 01:14:28,227
- Hello? Farmer residence?
-Yes.
871
01:14:28,394 --> 01:14:31,188
Well, I finally made it.
872
01:14:31,355 --> 01:14:34,150
Getting through to Redbud is
no easy business.
873
01:14:34,316 --> 01:14:35,985
Is Mr. Farmer there?
874
01:14:36,153 --> 01:14:38,196
No, he's--
875
01:14:39,364 --> 01:14:42,951
Well, he's still sleeping actually.
This is his wife. Can I help you?
876
01:14:43,118 --> 01:14:45,829
This is Michael Sinclair, Mrs. Farmer...
877
01:14:45,996 --> 01:14:47,914
...from Hufnagel and Brown...
878
01:14:48,081 --> 01:14:51,501
...your husband's publishing house.
-Oh, yes.
879
01:14:51,668 --> 01:14:54,838
Would you mind passing along
to your husband my apologies?
880
01:14:55,005 --> 01:14:57,674
I've been dealing with writers
for 15 years.
881
01:14:57,841 --> 01:15:02,346
You'd think I'd be used to
their eccentricities by now.
882
01:15:02,513 --> 01:15:05,683
Anyway, I acted like a fool
and I apologize.
883
01:15:06,017 --> 01:15:08,269
Your husband's a very talented man.
884
01:15:08,436 --> 01:15:09,896
Thank you.
885
01:15:10,062 --> 01:15:11,314
But how did you know?
886
01:15:11,481 --> 01:15:14,025
Believe me, Mrs. Farmer, I know.
887
01:15:14,192 --> 01:15:16,277
I have in front of me a manuscript...
888
01:15:16,444 --> 01:15:18,946
...that is simply wonderful.
889
01:15:19,113 --> 01:15:21,657
- It's fresh, it's original.
- You like it?
890
01:15:21,824 --> 01:15:24,619
We love it. And we want to put it out.
891
01:15:25,119 --> 01:15:27,413
Andy Will be thrilled.
892
01:15:27,790 --> 01:15:31,084
We don't actually publish children's books
here at Hufnagel.
893
01:15:31,251 --> 01:15:33,545
- But we have a subsidiary--
- Wait a minute.
894
01:15:33,712 --> 01:15:36,548
- Did you say "children's book"?
-Yes.
895
01:15:36,715 --> 01:15:40,636
Didn't he submit a book about
four poker buddies knocking over a casino?
896
01:15:41,303 --> 01:15:43,430
A casino?
897
01:15:43,597 --> 01:15:47,142
No. No, this book is about squirrels.
898
01:15:49,394 --> 01:15:51,230
Mrs. Farmer?
899
01:15:51,522 --> 01:15:53,399
Mrs. Farmer, are you there?
900
01:15:54,651 --> 01:15:56,194
Hello?
901
01:16:11,793 --> 01:16:14,504
- What's up?
-What's it look like?
902
01:16:14,712 --> 01:16:16,172
I'm leaving.
903
01:16:16,339 --> 01:16:17,799
And I want a divorce.
904
01:16:17,966 --> 01:16:21,136
- What's wrong?
-How could you?
905
01:16:21,595 --> 01:16:25,808
Have you no shame?
Have you actually sunk this low?
906
01:16:26,934 --> 01:16:28,435
What are you talking about?
907
01:16:28,602 --> 01:16:31,772
Your publisher just called.
He just loves the book you gave him.
908
01:16:31,939 --> 01:16:33,858
My book!
909
01:16:34,024 --> 01:16:37,361
What, were you drunk again?
Or just desperate?
910
01:16:39,154 --> 01:16:43,284
How could you do something
so pathetic and underhanded?
911
01:16:43,450 --> 01:16:45,120
AN DY:
Underhanded?
912
01:16:45,287 --> 01:16:47,539
What do you call writing a book
behind my back...
913
01:16:47,706 --> 01:16:49,833
...all the while telling me mine stinks?
914
01:16:50,166 --> 01:16:52,460
Talk about underhanded. Huh?
What about that?
915
01:16:55,213 --> 01:16:57,340
You're not taking the typewriter.
916
01:16:57,632 --> 01:17:01,344
I don't want your typewriter, Andy.
You keep it.
917
01:17:01,511 --> 01:17:04,681
Maybe you'll find a use for it someday.
918
01:17:05,932 --> 01:17:07,142
What about the apple?
919
01:17:07,767 --> 01:17:09,644
What apple?
920
01:17:09,811 --> 01:17:11,355
AN DY:
"What apple?"
921
01:17:11,522 --> 01:17:13,858
You know very well what apple.
The last apple.
922
01:17:14,025 --> 01:17:18,613
The one you ate when we were practically
starving. After you ate the last banana!
923
01:17:19,655 --> 01:17:20,823
Are you serious?
924
01:17:20,990 --> 01:17:23,659
Don't try to deny it.
I stepped on the core!
925
01:17:23,826 --> 01:17:25,036
Don't worry.
926
01:17:25,202 --> 01:17:30,583
I'm willing to concede that our marriage
has been just a series of mutual betrayals.
927
01:17:30,750 --> 01:17:34,128
I know it, you know it,
and Yellow Dog knows it!
928
01:17:34,295 --> 01:17:37,257
Yellow Dog doesn't even know
what town he lives in!
929
01:17:37,424 --> 01:17:40,177
I'm taking this truck
and I'm moving in with Mrs. Dinges!
930
01:17:40,344 --> 01:17:41,803
Good!
931
01:17:44,681 --> 01:17:46,350
Out!
932
01:17:46,516 --> 01:17:48,352
Scram! Beat it!
933
01:17:57,736 --> 01:18:01,156
Don't forget your pal, Andy!
934
01:18:14,295 --> 01:18:15,755
All right, then.
935
01:18:15,922 --> 01:18:21,010
We've come together in the matter
of Farmer v. Farmer.
936
01:18:21,177 --> 01:18:24,305
Mrs. Farmer, you're beginning
divorce proceedings...
937
01:18:24,472 --> 01:18:28,310
...against your husband, correct?
-Who wants the house?
938
01:18:28,477 --> 01:18:29,895
- I don't.
-Not me.
939
01:18:30,479 --> 01:18:33,649
GUS: Well, at least you're both
in agreement on something.
940
01:18:33,816 --> 01:18:36,527
Marion, when's the next
available court date?
941
01:18:36,694 --> 01:18:40,823
- We have to go to court?
GUS: We are merely attorneys, Mrs. Farmer...
942
01:18:40,990 --> 01:18:45,285
...handmaidens of the law.
Only a judge can dissolve a marriage.
943
01:18:45,452 --> 01:18:47,329
A circuit judge will be here
next month...
944
01:18:47,496 --> 01:18:50,749
...but that's when we go to trial
on your personal injury, it seems.
945
01:18:50,916 --> 01:18:53,920
Wait a minute. You represent him
in another matter?
946
01:18:54,254 --> 01:18:55,505
Yes, sir.
947
01:18:55,672 --> 01:18:58,758
-Isn't that a conflict of interest?
-Not in my book.
948
01:18:58,925 --> 01:19:02,053
Okay. How about
the first week in February?
949
01:19:02,721 --> 01:19:04,556
July would be better for me.
950
01:19:04,723 --> 01:19:07,017
July is seven months away.
951
01:19:07,976 --> 01:19:10,770
- Were you in a rush?
-Excuse us just a minute.
952
01:19:14,607 --> 01:19:17,318
You gotta get this ceiling
painted sometime, Marion.
953
01:19:20,781 --> 01:19:23,701
MAN: Move to carry. The town of Redbud
will seek official accreditation...
954
01:19:23,868 --> 01:19:26,328
...as the acorn capital of the world.
955
01:19:26,954 --> 01:19:30,541
Last on the agenda, Elizabeth and
Andy Farmer have requested permission...
956
01:19:30,708 --> 01:19:32,710
...to address the council.
957
01:19:32,877 --> 01:19:36,172
As the current lamb-fry record holder...
958
01:19:36,338 --> 01:19:39,467
...I'm sure Mr. Farmer
is familiar to you all.
959
01:19:50,812 --> 01:19:53,315
- Why don't you sit down?
-Cut it out.
960
01:19:54,649 --> 01:19:57,819
Thank you, Mayor Barclay,
members of the council.
961
01:19:59,529 --> 01:20:01,865
Citizens of Redbud.
962
01:20:03,825 --> 01:20:05,285
We came to Redbud...
963
01:20:05,452 --> 01:20:09,206
...filled with hopes and dreams
for a better life and a better place.
964
01:20:09,372 --> 01:20:12,335
And basically, we've seen
those hopes and dreams...
965
01:20:12,502 --> 01:20:15,505
...shattered and crushed
before our very eyes.
966
01:20:16,506 --> 01:20:21,552
Now, I'm not saying it's entirely your fault.
We're as much to blame for this as you.
967
01:20:21,886 --> 01:20:23,429
Well, maybe more like 60-40...
968
01:20:23,596 --> 01:20:26,307
...but we didn't come down here
to quibble over percentages.
969
01:20:26,474 --> 01:20:28,559
- What did you come here for?
-Sit down.
970
01:20:29,310 --> 01:20:31,979
We came here to ask your help
in selling our house.
971
01:20:32,146 --> 01:20:34,398
[MURMURING]
972
01:20:36,360 --> 01:20:37,861
There's money in this for you.
973
01:20:40,364 --> 01:20:43,283
Sit down. We can at least listen.
974
01:20:49,998 --> 01:20:51,416
Sit down.
975
01:20:51,583 --> 01:20:53,627
ANDY:
Thank you very much.
976
01:20:54,503 --> 01:20:56,922
My wife, Elizabeth.
977
01:21:01,593 --> 01:21:05,682
These are Saturday Evening Post
magazines from the '30s and the '40s.
978
01:21:05,849 --> 01:21:10,728
The covers of these magazines were
painted by a man named Norman Rockwell.
979
01:21:12,856 --> 01:21:15,900
Norman Rockwell knew a thing or two
about small-town life.
980
01:21:16,276 --> 01:21:19,070
Normal small-town life.
981
01:21:19,904 --> 01:21:24,409
He knew how people looked,
what they did, how they dressed.
982
01:21:24,576 --> 01:21:26,452
And that's what we want from you.
983
01:21:26,619 --> 01:21:29,498
We want you to look and dress and act...
984
01:21:29,665 --> 01:21:33,502
...just like the people
on the covers of these magazines.
985
01:21:34,086 --> 01:21:35,754
So...
986
01:21:36,422 --> 01:21:39,049
Pass them out amongst yourselves.
987
01:21:39,216 --> 01:21:42,511
Look at them. Study them.
988
01:21:42,678 --> 01:21:44,138
Take them home, if you wish.
989
01:21:44,305 --> 01:21:47,766
But be careful, they're on loan
from Mrs. Dinges' antique shop.
990
01:21:47,933 --> 01:21:52,521
Hold on, now, Mrs. Farmer.
Did we hear some mention of money?
991
01:21:52,688 --> 01:21:55,942
Within 24 hours of the close of escrow
on our property...
992
01:21:56,109 --> 01:22:02,240
...we will present to the town of Redbud
a check in the amount of $15,000.
993
01:22:04,784 --> 01:22:08,121
Also, a bonus of $50 each...
994
01:22:08,288 --> 01:22:10,081
...to any individual who performs...
995
01:22:10,248 --> 01:22:14,002
...a specific act of
traditional small-town behavior...
996
01:22:14,169 --> 01:22:16,504
...in the presence
of the prospective buyers.
997
01:22:16,671 --> 01:22:18,924
[CROWD CHEERING AND CLAPPING]
998
01:22:20,551 --> 01:22:25,431
Leave it to me, Andy and Elizabeth.
I'll ram this project home.
999
01:22:28,142 --> 01:22:32,480
ANDY: Now, how much notice do you think
you'll need to start acting normal?
1000
01:22:49,498 --> 01:22:51,083
Here they come.
1001
01:23:14,524 --> 01:23:17,193
They're going around front. Good.
1002
01:23:29,038 --> 01:23:31,332
Oh, Bud.
1003
01:23:31,499 --> 01:23:35,962
It's perfect.
It's just what we're looking for.
1004
01:23:37,631 --> 01:23:40,384
Oh, look, honey, ducks.
1005
01:23:45,639 --> 01:23:48,309
- Cue the deer.
-Roger.
1006
01:23:52,229 --> 01:23:54,356
Oh, look.
1007
01:23:57,776 --> 01:23:59,570
- Great.
-Play it cool, honey.
1008
01:23:59,737 --> 01:24:03,325
- Let's not let them think we're too eager.
-Yes, yes.
1009
01:24:03,491 --> 01:24:04,826
Go.
1010
01:24:08,121 --> 01:24:09,622
How do I look?
1011
01:24:11,750 --> 01:24:13,752
The pipe's a bit much.
1012
01:24:28,976 --> 01:24:33,064
- Yes?
-Hi, the Culbertsons, Bud and Betsy.
1013
01:24:33,397 --> 01:24:35,900
- Oh, yeah. Please come in.
-Thank you.
1014
01:24:36,067 --> 01:24:38,819
Darling, the Culbertsons are here.
1015
01:24:38,986 --> 01:24:40,613
Oh!
1016
01:24:40,780 --> 01:24:44,867
Didn't expect you so soon.
Andrew Farmer. Excuse the mess.
1017
01:24:45,534 --> 01:24:46,869
Don't you have a dog?
1018
01:24:47,787 --> 01:24:49,372
You bet.
1019
01:24:49,580 --> 01:24:52,458
He's probably out somewhere
scaring up game.
1020
01:24:53,376 --> 01:24:57,297
It's been a dream of ours for a long time,
moving out to the country.
1021
01:24:57,714 --> 01:24:59,299
Bud's going to write a novel.
1022
01:24:59,466 --> 01:25:00,801
[COUGHING]
1023
01:25:01,760 --> 01:25:03,345
How nice.
1024
01:25:04,513 --> 01:25:06,306
Excuse me.
1025
01:25:07,182 --> 01:25:09,059
This is a wonderful house to write in.
1026
01:25:09,559 --> 01:25:12,521
Do you mind if I ask why you're moving?
1027
01:25:12,687 --> 01:25:14,147
[HORN HONKING]
1028
01:25:14,314 --> 01:25:16,817
Well, actually we're being transferred.
1029
01:25:16,983 --> 01:25:18,443
Andy's with the government.
1030
01:25:18,610 --> 01:25:20,571
High-level position.
1031
01:25:21,114 --> 01:25:23,408
It's all classified.
1032
01:25:23,574 --> 01:25:25,493
You know how it is.
They never tell the wives--
1033
01:25:25,660 --> 01:25:27,829
[TRUCK BACKFIRES]
1034
01:25:53,272 --> 01:25:56,024
Mail, Mr. Farmer.
1035
01:25:56,483 --> 01:26:00,487
I'll just put it right over here
on the table for you, sir.
1036
01:26:01,238 --> 01:26:02,906
As usual, I weeded out...
1037
01:26:03,073 --> 01:26:05,242
...all of the junk mail myself.
1038
01:26:05,409 --> 01:26:09,621
Mrs. Farmer, Mrs. Petree asked me
to bring this over to you.
1039
01:26:09,788 --> 01:26:14,377
It's her traditional rum-nut-plum-raisin
cake of the season.
1040
01:26:14,544 --> 01:26:16,212
Thank you.
1041
01:26:17,672 --> 01:26:20,508
May I present Mr. and Mrs. Culbertson?
1042
01:26:21,551 --> 01:26:24,929
- Bud and Betsy.
-They're thinking of buying the house.
1043
01:26:25,096 --> 01:26:27,807
Oh, is that so? Well, you won't regret it.
1044
01:26:28,266 --> 01:26:33,271
But I'm really gonna be sorry
to see the Farmers go.
1045
01:26:33,438 --> 01:26:36,024
[CACKLING]
1046
01:26:38,736 --> 01:26:41,489
Well, I'd better be going.
1047
01:26:41,655 --> 01:26:46,827
Doing some ice fishing tonight. Pulling
some nice size pike out of the lake, I hear.
1048
01:26:46,994 --> 01:26:48,954
Good day to you folks.
1049
01:26:56,128 --> 01:26:57,588
Ice fishing?
1050
01:26:57,755 --> 01:27:00,424
I thought it was a nice touch.
1051
01:27:00,591 --> 01:27:03,053
But it'll cost you.
1052
01:27:10,727 --> 01:27:13,772
[BAND PLAYING
"DECK THE HALLS"]
1053
01:27:47,223 --> 01:27:49,976
This is gonna cost us a fortune.
1054
01:27:50,393 --> 01:27:53,647
The $50 bonus was your idea.
1055
01:27:53,814 --> 01:27:55,399
Little piece of heaven, isn't it, Bud?
1056
01:27:56,692 --> 01:27:59,027
- Very nice. Very nice.
WOMAN 1: Happy holidays.
1057
01:27:59,194 --> 01:28:01,738
MAN 1: Season's greetings.
BARCLAY: Merry Christmas. Ho, ho, ho.
1058
01:28:01,905 --> 01:28:04,283
MAN 2: Season's greetings, folks.
WOMAN 2: Merry Christmas.
1059
01:28:04,449 --> 01:28:08,537
BARCLAY: Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas.
Ho,ho,ho.
1060
01:28:08,704 --> 01:28:12,082
Merry Christmas. Andy.
1061
01:28:17,671 --> 01:28:21,009
Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas.
1062
01:28:21,175 --> 01:28:25,179
Merry Christmas, folks. Merry Christmas.
1063
01:28:25,346 --> 01:28:27,015
- Merry Christmas.
-Hello, sheriff.
1064
01:28:27,181 --> 01:28:28,850
Is everything going well in Redbud?
1065
01:28:29,017 --> 01:28:30,935
I was just about to take a run
to your place.
1066
01:28:31,102 --> 01:28:33,146
BUD:
You patrol the homes outside of town?
1067
01:28:33,313 --> 01:28:35,273
Absolutely. Twice a day.
1068
01:28:35,440 --> 01:28:38,192
Check for any suspicious vehicles
or persons in the area.
1069
01:28:38,359 --> 01:28:40,945
If the owner is on vacation,
I try the locks.
1070
01:28:41,112 --> 01:28:42,697
Pick up all the newspapers.
1071
01:28:42,864 --> 01:28:46,619
- Redbud may be a small town--
-Well, keep up the good work, sheriff.
1072
01:28:46,910 --> 01:28:49,038
Ivy's is open. Hungry, Bud?
1073
01:28:49,788 --> 01:28:51,582
- Merry Christmas.
-Merry Christmas, sheriff.
1074
01:28:51,749 --> 01:28:53,876
Merry Christmas.
1075
01:28:54,376 --> 01:28:56,629
MAN 1: Watch it.
MAN 2: Move out of the way!
1076
01:28:56,795 --> 01:28:58,589
[GAS PS]
1077
01:29:03,969 --> 01:29:05,929
AN DY:
Watch your step.
1078
01:29:08,724 --> 01:29:11,978
ALL:
Merry Christmas.
1079
01:29:12,395 --> 01:29:13,730
- Merry Christmas.
-Merry Christmas.
1080
01:29:13,897 --> 01:29:15,357
Merry Christmas.
1081
01:29:15,523 --> 01:29:17,359
[CAROLERS SINGING
"DECK THE HALLS"]
1082
01:29:17,525 --> 01:29:20,028
BOY:
Hey, Morn, this is fun!
1083
01:29:43,219 --> 01:29:44,929
Thank you.
1084
01:30:02,989 --> 01:30:06,827
That was just beautiful. Why don't you all
come inside for some hot cocoa and eggnog?
1085
01:30:06,993 --> 01:30:09,121
[CHATTERING]
1086
01:30:16,128 --> 01:30:19,381
[SINGING "JOY TO THE WORLD"]
1087
01:30:37,316 --> 01:30:39,944
A toast to the Farmers.
We'll miss you or my name isn't...
1088
01:30:40,111 --> 01:30:43,448
...Otis Berryhill, 23 Redbud Road.
-To the Farmers!
1089
01:30:43,614 --> 01:30:45,074
Thank you.
1090
01:30:46,659 --> 01:30:49,746
I would like to propose a toast too,
if I may.
1091
01:30:49,954 --> 01:30:52,790
I may not be a sentimental man...
1092
01:30:52,957 --> 01:30:55,544
...but there is something
I would like to say at this time.
1093
01:30:55,711 --> 01:30:59,131
It's very hard for Elizabeth and me
to say farewell.
1094
01:30:59,923 --> 01:31:03,177
There will always be a special place
for Redbud in our hearts.
1095
01:31:05,679 --> 01:31:10,392
And I know that you will show
the new owners, whoever they may be...
1096
01:31:11,935 --> 01:31:14,271
...the same affection
that you've shown us.
1097
01:31:15,022 --> 01:31:19,234
And that they too will grow to love
this town and this house...
1098
01:31:19,402 --> 01:31:24,199
...and all of you wonderful people
just as much as we have.
1099
01:31:24,365 --> 01:31:25,533
My friends...
1100
01:31:25,700 --> 01:31:26,993
[YELLOW DOG GROWLING]
1101
01:31:27,160 --> 01:31:28,203
...as the saying goes:
1102
01:31:28,369 --> 01:31:29,370
[THUDS]
1103
01:31:29,537 --> 01:31:31,039
Once a Redbudian...
1104
01:31:31,206 --> 01:31:34,125
ALL:
Always a Redbudian.
1105
01:31:34,375 --> 01:31:36,836
ANDY:
And so, my friends, a toast.
1106
01:31:38,171 --> 01:31:40,590
- To Redbud.
ALL: To Redbud.
1107
01:31:40,757 --> 01:31:44,969
OTIS: Well, back to work. Thanks, Andy.
-Goodbye, Otis.
1108
01:31:46,972 --> 01:31:48,682
Merry Christmas.
1109
01:31:48,849 --> 01:31:50,768
- Warren Smith.
-Warren Smith.
1110
01:31:51,727 --> 01:31:53,479
- Bob Connor.
-Bob Connor.
1111
01:31:53,729 --> 01:31:55,815
- Connie Caliber.
-Connie Caliber.
1112
01:31:55,981 --> 01:31:57,233
Bill Benden.
1113
01:32:01,403 --> 01:32:04,365
No, no. No, no, no.
1114
01:32:04,532 --> 01:32:06,659
Get out of here.
1115
01:32:06,909 --> 01:32:08,702
Merry Christmas.
1116
01:32:09,078 --> 01:32:11,540
- Doris Newbury.
-Doris, hi.
1117
01:32:11,748 --> 01:32:15,794
- Elizabeth Garfield.
-Elizabeth Garfield.
1118
01:32:17,128 --> 01:32:18,755
Andy.
1119
01:32:19,339 --> 01:32:22,425
Betsy and I wanna sleep on it...
1120
01:32:22,592 --> 01:32:26,346
...but I think we'll be back in the morning
to make you an offer on the house.
1121
01:32:27,389 --> 01:32:30,016
What, tomorrow?
Well, where are you staying tonight?
1122
01:32:30,183 --> 01:32:32,185
Sid's Hideaway Bungalows.
1123
01:32:32,352 --> 01:32:34,312
No, no, stay away from town.
Stay with us.
1124
01:32:34,813 --> 01:32:38,651
- Stay in our guest room.
BUD: Well, that's awful nice of you, Andy.
1125
01:32:38,818 --> 01:32:41,070
It's no problem at all. Happy to do it.
1126
01:32:44,532 --> 01:32:46,909
Okay, let's get our bags.
1127
01:32:53,875 --> 01:32:57,628
[SINGING "SILENT NIGHT"]
1128
01:33:43,718 --> 01:33:47,055
ELIZABETH:
I love the sound of Christmas carolers.
1129
01:33:47,221 --> 01:33:48,556
AN DY:
Yeah.
1130
01:33:49,474 --> 01:33:51,726
They've been at it for hours.
1131
01:33:57,107 --> 01:34:00,861
You can have the bed.
I'll sleep on the floor.
1132
01:34:01,862 --> 01:34:03,948
I'm sorry about this.
1133
01:34:04,114 --> 01:34:06,200
It's only for one night.
1134
01:34:09,244 --> 01:34:10,788
You did it, Andy.
1135
01:34:10,955 --> 01:34:13,374
You really pulled it off.
1136
01:34:13,791 --> 01:34:16,043
Of course I did, Elizabeth.
1137
01:34:17,127 --> 01:34:19,296
Being a fake is what I do best.
1138
01:34:43,655 --> 01:34:45,825
BUD:
That's our offer, Andy.
1139
01:34:57,670 --> 01:35:02,008
- This is more than we're asking.
-We want it all. The furniture...
1140
01:35:02,174 --> 01:35:05,594
...the dishes, the pots and pans.
BETSY: It's all so perfect.
1141
01:35:05,761 --> 01:35:08,389
- We want everything.
-I even want the dog.
1142
01:35:10,057 --> 01:35:13,311
Yellow Dog? You want Yellow Dog?
1143
01:35:13,520 --> 01:35:16,565
Just initial that offer on the bottom,
Andy, and we'll call it a deal.
1144
01:35:34,541 --> 01:35:37,378
I've done a lot of things
I'm ashamed of lately, Elizabeth.
1145
01:35:38,963 --> 01:35:42,550
Made a lot of mistakes.
I don't wanna make another one.
1146
01:35:48,473 --> 01:35:50,224
I don't wanna move. I like it here.
1147
01:35:53,811 --> 01:35:55,480
I don't wanna move either.
1148
01:35:55,646 --> 01:35:57,690
Hey, what is this?
1149
01:35:57,857 --> 01:36:00,735
- And I don't want a divorce.
-Neither do I.
1150
01:36:01,152 --> 01:36:03,781
- You don't?
-Of course not.
1151
01:36:04,531 --> 01:36:06,283
I don't know what I was doing.
1152
01:36:06,450 --> 01:36:08,577
You were acting so strange.
1153
01:36:10,037 --> 01:36:12,247
I know I was. I'm sorry.
1154
01:36:12,414 --> 01:36:14,333
So am I.
1155
01:36:14,500 --> 01:36:17,127
Hold it. Wait a minute here.
1156
01:36:17,377 --> 01:36:18,837
What the hell is going on?
1157
01:36:19,004 --> 01:36:20,672
[AN DY SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY]
1158
01:36:20,839 --> 01:36:22,049
What?
1159
01:36:22,216 --> 01:36:24,843
He says the house is no longer for sale.
1160
01:36:25,677 --> 01:36:27,012
Well, he can't do that.
1161
01:36:27,179 --> 01:36:29,140
[AN DY SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY]
1162
01:36:29,307 --> 01:36:32,143
He says we've decided to stay.
1163
01:36:33,061 --> 01:36:35,396
Come on, Betsy.
Let's get the hell out of here.
1164
01:36:36,231 --> 01:36:39,567
- You'll be hearing from my attorney, Farmer.
ANDY: Fuck you.
1165
01:36:39,734 --> 01:36:41,027
He says...
1166
01:36:41,194 --> 01:36:46,282
...you can contact him through
the law offices of Marion Corey, Jr.
1167
01:36:49,035 --> 01:36:51,121
[CAROLERS SINGING "JINGLE BELLS"]
1168
01:36:55,459 --> 01:36:57,044
BUD: Out of the way.
Get out of the way.
1169
01:36:57,211 --> 01:36:59,630
Out of the way.
Out of the way.
1170
01:37:04,176 --> 01:37:06,220
Shut up!
1171
01:37:26,783 --> 01:37:29,244
Everybody gather around.
1172
01:37:29,786 --> 01:37:32,122
Gather around, everybody.
1173
01:37:34,708 --> 01:37:36,668
May I have your attention, please?
1174
01:37:38,837 --> 01:37:40,338
I have an announcement to make.
1175
01:37:40,505 --> 01:37:43,717
Sorry, Andy and Elizabeth. We let those two
get away. We'll do better next time.
1176
01:37:43,884 --> 01:37:45,260
AN DY:
That doesn't matter anymore.
1177
01:37:45,428 --> 01:37:47,388
I have good news.
1178
01:37:47,555 --> 01:37:50,600
We're not leaving.
We've decided to stay.
1179
01:37:50,766 --> 01:37:51,934
[MURMURING]
1180
01:37:52,101 --> 01:37:53,352
What about our money?
1181
01:37:54,604 --> 01:37:56,939
Well, I know that was
part of the original plan...
1182
01:37:57,106 --> 01:37:59,066
...but the circumstances have changed.
1183
01:37:59,233 --> 01:38:01,110
We still get our money, don't we?
1184
01:38:02,486 --> 01:38:04,572
Well, I'm sure that all of you...
1185
01:38:04,739 --> 01:38:07,408
...in the spirit of the joyous
Christmas season...
1186
01:38:07,575 --> 01:38:10,161
...will find it in your hearts--
1187
01:38:10,578 --> 01:38:12,331
Perhaps not.
1188
01:38:19,379 --> 01:38:21,965
[DUCKS QUACKING]
1189
01:38:31,141 --> 01:38:32,142
All right.
1190
01:38:32,309 --> 01:38:34,811
AN DY: Mayor Barclay ruled we weren't
liable for the 15 grand...
1191
01:38:34,978 --> 01:38:37,482
...since we never actually
sold the house.
1192
01:38:37,649 --> 01:38:39,817
But we decided to make good
on the $50 bonuses...
1193
01:38:39,984 --> 01:38:42,654
...which greatly improved
our relationship with the town.
1194
01:38:43,488 --> 01:38:46,407
Elizabeth, meanwhile,
has had two new books published.
1195
01:38:46,574 --> 01:38:49,244
And I've been working
for the Redbud Gazette.
1196
01:38:49,410 --> 01:38:53,414
As a novelist, I turned out to be
a pretty good sportswriter.
1197
01:38:53,665 --> 01:38:55,166
Before leaving New York...
1198
01:38:55,333 --> 01:38:58,211
...Elizabeth and I thought we knew
exactly what we were getting into.
1199
01:38:58,378 --> 01:39:01,923
Well, we were wrong
about almost everything.
1200
01:39:02,090 --> 01:39:04,093
But one thing we had right.
1201
01:39:04,260 --> 01:39:07,179
Moving to the country was
the best decision we ever made.
1202
01:39:07,346 --> 01:39:10,432
- We're tied.
-All right. Bring it in, bring it in.
1203
01:39:15,354 --> 01:39:17,523
- Safe!
-What?
90030
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