All language subtitles for Barry.S02E07.The.Audition.720p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-NTb[eztv]

I wanted to say thank you
for pushing me.

-(BULLETS RICOCHET)
-Now I have a purpose.

(MEN CHANTING)

NOHO HANK:
The debt has been paid.

Slate is clean.
You owe me nothing.

♪ (FUNK MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

I can't work with you
anymore, man.

Oh, Jesus Christ,
not this thing again. Why?!

You wore a wire.
You sold me out.

I got you, Barry!
(LAUGHS)

Tell me the time
when I met Ken.

Sam, just don't be an idiot.

(YELLING)
You calling me an idiot?!

(ADMIRINGLY)
End scene.

(APPLAUSE)

Hank. It's go time.

Capture the monastery
before the caravan arrives,

or we are--

Fuck.

Cristobal?

We are very disappointed
in you, Hank.

-(GRUNTS)
-♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪

So, Lindsay told us all
about the show you're doing.

Oh, yeah. Well, it's still
kind of a... a work in progress.

Humble.
I love it.

Well, sounded really great,
really great, really important.

But mostly, really great.

Thank you.

The point is, in this climate,

you've got hashtag MeToo,
hashtag HandsOff.

Right, so--
I-I told them

that you're directing
and writing your own piece,

and how moving
and relevant it was,

and these guys
had a great idea.

Okay.

We'd like to put you
in a room with Aaron Ryan.

-The TV producer?
-He's a client.

Oh, my
God! Oh, my God!

Sorry, I-- Oh, my God,
I love Divorced Women.
It's so good.

And what was that one, um,

what was the one, you know,
about the teens in prison?

-Lindsay: Prison Teens.
- Prison Teens. Yeah,
we had the package on that.

It ran ten seasons.
Paid for the Mapplethorpe
in the mail room.

Aah, shit, fuck.

Sorry, feature falling apart.
Keep talking.

Anyway, Aaron has a project.
It sounds perfect for you.

Wait, for me?

For one of
the leads, Sally.

(chuckling):
Oh, my God.

Aaron Ryan?

(sighs)

-I'm nervous.
-Don't be nervous.

-Don't seem nervous.
-Sally: Okay.

Are you a client here?

Oh, no. No, uh,
my girlfriend is.

Sally Reed?
I'm her ride.

Oh, you're Barry Block?

Yeah.

Michael Cohen.
Yeah, my associate
Lindsay saw you

in Sally's piece,
said you were great.

She said,
"He's very loud."

Ah, she didn't
have to say that.

How tall are you?

-So, we'll see
you at 11:00 a.m.
-Yeah.

-Very excited for you.
-Thank you. Oh.

(air kisses)

(sighs)

-Congrats. You deserve it.
-Thank you. Okay.

-I'm so excited for you.
-Thank you.

-Yeah.
-Okay, I'll see
you tomorrow.

-Yeah, see you tomorrow.
-Okay, okay.

Get some sleep.

Thank you.
Wow. Thank you.

-Okay, cool.
-Hey. Hey.

Hey!
Oh, wow!

Look good. You look good.
You look good.

Oh, my God.
They are putting me
in a room tomorrow

with Aaron Ryan!

-Oh, wow!
-To talk about being the lead
in one of his new shows.

Or, well, yeah, a lead.

Yeah, Aaron Ryan,
I've seen that name
on billboards.

-That's huge.
-Yeah. I mean, he's massive.

Oh, my God.
I can't believe this.

It's just, it's so crazy
that I just, like,

put my art out into
the universe, you know,

and I'm already seeing
the benefits I deserve.

-Aw!
-Thank you so much

for helping me with my scene
and for pushing me, and...

It's you.
It's all you.

Were you just talking
to Michael?

Is that his name?
The guy with the ball?
Michael? Yeah, no.

He was super nice.
Yeah, he just got me
an audition.

-What?
-Yeah, I didn't realize
that's how it worked.

It's kind of neat.

(theme music playing)

So...

So, it-it's a feature?

No, it's a movie.
So, how did your
thing go?

And, um, you're,

you're going straight in
for... for the director?

Yeah. Some guy
named Jay Roach.

They like me
'cause I'm tall,

and the other guy
they cast is short.

Apparently, it affects
the poster.

The poster?
(chuckles)

Uh, so, so, so,
let me get this straight.

So, so, just because
you're tall,

you skipped like five rounds
of callbacks, at least?

I mean, Michael
is Lindsay's boss.

Michael?

Michael.

-The man you met
in the lobby.
-Oh, right.

Yeah, he gave me
his card. Michael.

(sighs)

-An audition?
-Mm-hmm.

-You?
-Yeah.

-Have an audition?
-Yeah.

What, are they
reading extras now?

No. That is so weird.
Sally said the same thing.

-What's the part?
-It's a guy named, um...

J.T. in a movie called
Swim Instructors.

How many of these
did you print?

It's just one.
It's four scenes.

Holy moly.
J.T. is on every page.

That's a lot
of lines, Barry.

Yeah, I think
he's one of the leads.

(gasps)
No!

You say, "Oh, we're just
a bunch of swim instructors."

That's the title.
They can't cut that!

(doors creaking)

All of you, on your feet!

Now!

If we grab...
Yeah, if you grab me,
and we just...

There we go.

(chains rattling)

Cristobal? Okay.
Come on, my friend.

Uh... Maybe fresh start?

You know,
one-time do-over?

Mulligan?
Get out of free jail?

Get on.

(plays funeral dirge)

Oh, for fuck's sake.
This fucking guy.

Can someone please
shut him up?

Bolivian:
Get on.

At this point, for me,

the worst reason
to make another TV show

would be to make a TV show.

-You know what I mean?
-I... Uh-huh.

Like, another zero
on my paychecks

-isn't going to change my life.
-(Sally chuckles)

I mean, at this point,
I'm really gravitating

towards smaller,
more interesting,

more relevant material.

Like, I'm interested in
what's going on right now.

Yes. Totally. Me, too.

I mean, I am also gravitating
toward more honest--

Which isn't
what's being made.

I mean, not in
this town, at least.

So, look, it sounds like
we might be a good fit.

Totally.
(chuckles)

Yeah, Team Gersh
told me about your past,

what you're
working on right now.

Sounds really relevant,
really current.

Thank you. I-I really
appreciate that because--

So, the elevator pitch
is basically this:

There's three women.

When we meet them,
they're all in
abusive relationships.

They're lost.
But then over
the course of the pilot,

they meet each other,
they realize how much
they have in common,

and they start to lean
on each other.

-Oh, that's nice.
-And because now there's
this sense of community,

-they become stronger.
-That's great. I love that.

So, they start a group where
they kill their husbands.

-Jesus.
-But that's the pilot.

The series is them
finding other women

in similar tough spots
and helping them get revenge,

whether it's slipping poison
into the dudes' cocktails

or blowing them and the new
girlfriend up on a boat.

It's empowering.

I'm really not supposed
to show you this.

-Payback Ladies?
-Yeah.

-Payback Ladies.
-Payback Ladies.

You'd be this one.

"It's that time
of the month...
for revenge."

Maybe this one.

What do you mean you passed?

You just passed on
an Aaron Ryan show? Why?

It was about three
abused women, um,

who become
murderers, okay?

I mean, he had
a period pun on the poster.
It was offensive.

The show has three leads in it,

and you would be one of them.

Do you not want to be
a lead in a TV show?

-Not that TV show, no.
-(door opens)

Did I just hear this right?
Did you just pass on Aaron Ryan?

Guys, look, I really appreciate
you getting me the meeting.

Really, I do. But I--

I mean, Lindsay,
you saw my piece.

Do you really think
that what he's doing

and what I'm doing
are the same thing?

-Uh...
-Can I be blunt?

You really
don't have the credits
to be turning this down.

-Yeah, we've all seen your reel.
-You cut together my reel.

You can't honestly think
that little theater piece

is a better
career move than this.

Look, I want to work, okay?
I really want to work.

I want to be the lead
on a TV show, obviously.

But I am trying
to do something real,

and that was not it.

That was revenge porn.

Well, let us know how big
the paycheck is on your play.

You know, maybe this
isn't a good fit.

Uh...

Hey, Sally.
Okay, Sally.

All right, Barry.

Somehow, you now
have an audition
for a major feature.

-Movie.
-Same process.

Now, they didn't send
the whole script.

They only sent your scenes.

We're gonna have to do
a little detective work,

and from what I can gather,
here's the journey.

-J.T.--
-J.T.'s one of
the swim instructors.

Yeah, I had a hunch.

He's very upset
in the beginning.

Yeah, 'cause, uh, another
swim instructor, Ike,
stole his girlfriend.

Oh, dear.

So, Ike has forced the horns
of the cuckold upon you,

so your guy seeks revenge by...

shitting in a pie
and trying to get him
to eat it.

Yeah, that's how I read it.

And then by some
cruel twist of irony...

you eat the shit pie.

Yeah, but that's not until
scene three, right?

I'm trying not
to overwhelm you, Barry.

I'm trying to give you
the view from 10,000 feet

before we dive in
and break it down
scene by scene.

-So, scene one, "Loss."
-Mm-hmm.

Scene two,
you shit in a pie.

So, uh, relief?

No. I think it's a little
more nuanced than that.

I think it's
about vengeance.

-Okay.
-And then, scene three,

whoopsie,
you eat the shit pie.

Comeuppance.

He who seeks revenge
digs two graves, Barry.

It's a tale as old as time.

Damn.

And then there's scene four

about the little girl
who's drowning,

but you don't
have to save her.

Yeah, 'cause I taught
her how to swim.

Yeah. And I think you only
have one line, which is...

-"No fucking way."
-"No fucking way."

So, you know what?
Let's save that for later.

Oh, okay.

By the way,
when is your audition?

Uh, it is--
I got it right here.

Tomorrow at 10:00 a.m.
with the casting director,
Allison Jones.

(chuckles)
No. Ms. Jones will show up
when the director's there.

No, it's a director's session.
He's there, too.

His name is Jay Roach.

Whose cock did you have
to suck in a former life?

All right. All right.
All right. Forget it.

I'll be there 9:45
to warm you up.

-Wait. You're gonna
come with me?
-Absolutely.

Every actor who's got a first
audition brings a scene partner.

-Really?
-Since Shakespeare.

Come on.
Let's get down to work.

Scene one. I just want
to hear the words.

I'm dying.

Hey, Ike, you shitbird!

(high-pitched):
You want a little pie?

Mr. Cousineau said
I should, um,

put a little mustard
on "pie" there--

I'm sorry. Can we, um...
Can we stop?

-Sure.
-For a second.

I just-- I feel like I need
to say something, Barry.

-Okay.
-This piece that
I'm doing for class.

It's exactly what
I should be doing.

Yeah, no, and it's great.
What you're doing is--

I'm terrified, okay?
Because my piece is real.

It's not a character. It's me.

Raw, unapologetic truth
with a capital "T."

I mean, all caps, actually.
I'm thinking like a writer now.

I mean, this was stuff that
I couldn't even talk about
without lying.

And here I am, about
to strip naked in front
of a bunch of strangers

and share something that
I am massively ashamed of.

Not literally. I don't
believe in nudity unless
it drives the story forward.

I'm afraid
that they're gonna judge me,

and I'm afraid
that Sam's gonna find out

and do something crazy.

But I have to do this.

It's-- it's my story to tell.

But then, I mean,
so many other women
have the same story.

What, am I a spokesperson
for them now?

Could I be the face
of a movement?

I mean, what if I get it wrong?

I mean, I resent the fact
that Nick can get up there

and talk about his
"stomach condition,"

and it's not like he has to be
the poster boy for bulimia.

But I get up there,
and whatever I say,
it's like,

"What are we saying
about women?"

I mean, this is just my story!

"But what if you
get it wrong, Sally?"

"I don't know."
"You can't get it wrong, Sally.

But you can't not
tell it either, Sally,
because it's who you are."

Which makes this thing that
my agents sent me on today
so fucking insulting.

Payback Ladies?

It's just another
shit male idea of
what strong women are.

Oh, oh, oh, grab a gun
and some stilettos

and get a goddamn blowout.

"And look how strong
you are now, Sally!"

It's bullshit!
Which, by the way, so is this.

It's quite possibly
the worst thing I've ever read.

But you want to know
the worst part?

You want to know what's really
driving me fucking crazy?

I am so jealous that
you're reading for this.

I have never had
a director's session
for a feature,

which is the same thing
as a movie, P.S.

And I have been doing
this for way longer,

and I think you'd agree
that I am way better.

I... made you!

And I'm actually
represented by Gersh.

Well, at least I was.
I don't even know if
they'd rep me anymore

after what I said
in there today, but still
at least I held my ground,

because I am an artist,
okay, an artist,
and this is not fucking art.

But then, I mean,
to be honest, of course
I'm so happy for you.

I mean, of course I want
you to get this part,

and I want to be
the one to help you

learn your lines
and fix your inflections.

But I need you to know
that if you do get it,

it's gonna make me like...

like a hundred times
more insane.

Okay?

(sighs)

Continue.

(pages rustling)

Hey, Ike, you shitbird.
You want a little pie?

(bus thumps)

(man shouts in foreign language)

Guys? Guys!

(indistinct shouting)

♪ ♪

(front door opens)

(back door opens)

Noho Hank:
What are they doing?

(monks chatting indistinctly)

-(footsteps thumping)
-(gasoline splashing)

Noho Hank:
Okay, shit.
Yeah, gasoline.

Okay, they're gonna
burn us. Fuck.

Oh, boy. All right,
this is it.

Yeah, this is it.
I've killed us all.

Okay, um, hey, guys?

Since we're all about
to die in a moment,

I have to be honest
about something, okay?

I have been
deceiving you guys.

And before we die,

-I have to come clean.
-(grunting)

I know you look at me
and you see
hard-as-nails criminal,

stone-cold killer,
ice man.

But, uh, this is lie.

In fact, I have been
lying about who I am
my entire life.

Real talk?
I should not be manager
of crime syndicate.

I should be manager
of hotel...

-chain of hotels.
-(men grunting)

Instead of being
this conning man,

playing the role of
the ruthless gangster.

I mean, that is not
who I am, because...

-(continues indistinctly)
-(guard grunts)

NoHo Hank:
...so be it.

I'm nice. I'm polite.

I'm optometrist
by nature, you know?

But because I did not
have courage to stand up

and be my true self,
nice guy,

and instead chose
pants-on-fire existence,

we are all on
the barbecue bus.

So, guys, I am really sorry

for, uh, convincing you
I was ruthless leader.

I will regret it
for the rest of my life.

Probably two more minutes.

So, in closing, hopefully
there is afterlife,

and I can host
you all in heaven

and make you
delicious appetizers.

Wouldn't that
be something, guys?

Guys?

Guys!

-(automatic gunfire)
-(indistinct shouting)

(Esther shouting
in Burmese)

-(indistinct shouting)
-(gunfire continuing)

-(bullets ricocheting)
-(glass shattering)

(flames whooshing)

-(coughs)
-(footsteps thudding)

(man grunting)

(man screaming)

Guys? Esther is leaving!

Also, really need
your help here.

Please!

(coughing)

-Mayrbek! (coughing)
-Aah! (shouting)

NoHo Hank (choking, coughing):
Mayrbek...

♪ ♪

(coughing)

(flames whooshing, crackling)

(coughing)

Okay, guys.

(sighs)
Looks like
we did it, huh?

He helped. Go team!

Akhmal, how you doing, buddy?

-How's the, uh, arm?
-(man grunts)

-Both arms?
-(Akhmal groans)

-Khazam, well, well, well.
-(accordion wheezes)

The musical traitor.
You know what happens
to cowards like you?

-(gunshot echoes)
-(accordion wheezes)

I was getting to that, man.

Okay, seriously, I was
right about to do that.

-Okay, guys, so--
-(Mayrbek speaks Chechen)

-(men muttering)
-Guys...

Wait, hold phone.
Is this about
what I said on bus?

Because I was delegating.

Okay? To empower you.

That's what
a good leader does.

And, uh, like a good leader,

I'm gonna get us some Ubers.

Once I get to a place
with enough bars.

Guys, it's hard to,
uh, type and walk.

Lindsay:
It's just embarrassing.

That Aaron Ryan thing was
a terrible fit for you.

And so lame, by the way.

And, you know,
I saw "lead role,"

and I was thinking like
an agent, in the worst way.

I-- Honestly,
Lindsay, it's okay.

No, it's not.

Sally, I work for you.

I should be
supporting your voice.

I want to support artists.

I promise I will be a better
agent moving forward.

You still want
to represent me?

Yes. And first and foremost,
by getting behind this piece.

-(chuckles)
-All morning, I've been
rolling calls with

casting directors,
executives, producers.

I've been working my ass off
to fill this audience

with industry professionals.

So, wh--what about
Mike and Michael?

I mean, they thought
the whole thing was silly.

Yeah, I haven't, like,
looped them in yet.

But don't worry about the Mikes.
I'll get them on board.

What about the rest
of the class?

Because the whole thing was
kind of supposed to be, like,

this evening where everyone
was gonna tell their stories,

and everybody's been
working really hard, and--

I-- You know, I don't--
I don't represent them,

but as far as I'm concerned,
if you want them in it,

they're in it.

What do you say?

I say... yes!

(class cheering)

-Oh my God!
I gotta get writing! Shit!
-Yeah.

-Um, I should show you
around the theater.
-The theater, so, I'm...

I might have already
pulled the trigger

on a different venue.

One of our senior partners
is on the board here,

so we managed
to pull some strings.

The whole place is yours.

But it's gotta be
tomorrow night.

Tomorrow?

(class murmuring)

How many seats
is this?

Four hundred.

Wow... wow.

-Hey, you guys wanna
see the dressing rooms?
-All: Yes! Yes.

-Oh, my God.
-(excited chattering)

♪ ♪

(phone buzzing)

Hey, Mr. Cousineau, um,

guys brought their own
pies to the audition.

Could you pick me one up
on your way over here?

Listen, I am so sorry
to leave you in the lurch,
but I am not gonna make it.

What do you mean you're
not gonna make it?
Who's gonna read with me?

I'm headed up to my cabin.

Cabin? Wait, your cabin?

This private detective
approached me.

He said he wants to take
a look at the area again,

'cause he thinks he can
get to the bottom of
what happened to Janice.

-Private detective?
- Yeah, his name is
Kenneth Goulet.

Oh, you know what?
Here he is now.

Hold on. He wants
to talk to you.

-Barry.
-Ah.

Hi. Kenneth Goulet speaking.

♪ ♪

Fuches?

Fuches, don't--
don't do this.

Oh, it's good to talk to you,
too, there, Berkman.

Now, you don't-- you don't
happen to remember

anything more about the night
Ms. Moss disappeared, do you?

Fuches, I'll go back
to Cleveland.

I'll-- I'll kill again.
I'll do whatever
you want to do.

Just please, please.
Don't hurt Mr. Cousineau.

Shut up. (chuckles)
You think I'm out of moves?

Fuck you, I'm out of moves!

Fuches, please--

Barry Block?
You ready?

Jay Roach:
So, just one thing
before we get going.

Um, how tall are you?

Six-two.

Oh, great.

Jay:
Good, good. Okay.

Casting Assistant:
I'm gonna read
with you, Barry.

"J.T., what's up,
boner boy?"

"Hey, Ike."

"Heard you and
the junior lifesavers

had a pretty crazy
night last night."

-Where'd you get that?
-"From Gwyneth.

When she came over
to my place last night."

Barry:
What?

"Yeah, I'm boning
your girlfriend.
Later, Homes."

(as Jethro):
"J.T. Dudeman, did I
just hear that right?

Did Ike say he was
boning Gwyneth?"

Yeah, that's what
you heard, Jethro.

"Well, forget her.
You should just move on,

like you don't
give a shit."

Oh, I'm gonna give
a shit, all right.

Literally.

Wow, you really...

underplayed that.
(chuckles)

It's like you didn't do
any of the jokes.

Do you wanna do
the second scene?

Wow.

He did not give a fuck.

No.

What's his name again?

Uh, Barry Block.
He's-- he's six-two.

♪ ♪

Gene:
Well, this is it.

-Come on in.
-Ah.

Wow.

Barry Block.

Isn't that the guy
I talked to on the phone?

I thought you said
his name was Berkman.

-Yeah, well, he changed it.
-Oh, he changed it?

Well, nine times out of ten,

a new name means
shady character.

No, it's a stage name,
Mr. Goulet.

And, uh, he took on a whole
new identity with it.

How do you mean?

Look, it might say
"drama teacher"
on my business card,

but in actuality,
I'm more of a therapist,

a father, if you will,
to those kids.

And that boy,
when I met him?

No direction,
nobody in his corner.

He was like a plastic bag
blowing in the wind.

But together,
we turned that around.

He's got
a big audition today.

That's where he was
when we spoke to him.

I am so proud of him.

-Want a tour?
I'll show you the rest.
-No. Let's take a walk.

♪ ♪

(tires squealing)

Gene:
You sure you know
where you're going?

Oh, yeah. Uh-huh.

It's down this way.

(engine racing)

It's lovely.

Just lovely... country
out here, isn't it?

Gene? Lovely scenery?

Hey, Gene, uh, could you
tell me what kind of tree

that would be
right over there?

You know, it kind of looks like
the same one that's over--

Wait. That couldn't be
Janice's car, do you think?

I do.

Well, we gotta--
we gotta come closer.

We gotta-- all right?

We gotta make sure, okay,

that it's her car, okay?

What do you think?

It's her car.

We found her car.
Oh, boy.

Okay, you know what
I'm gonna do?

I'm gonna borrow
your phone here.

I'm just gonna step away
for a sec, right over there.

I'm gonna call the cops.

(engine racing)

(quietly):
I'd like to report the body
of Detective Janice Moss.

My name is Gene Cousineau,

and I killed her,

and I just couldn't
live with it anymore.

(panting)

If you're okay with it,

I wanna open the trunk.

Good. It's all right.
Here we go.

Okay.

Now, you okay, Gene?

(gasps)

Oh...

(cocks gun)

(birds twittering)

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

Fuches...

I'm coming for you.

♪ (MUSIC PLAYS, CONCLUDES) ♪