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1
00:00:01,567 --> 00:00:03,701
♪ ooh-ooh-ooh ♪♪
2
00:00:03,769 --> 00:00:06,704
♪ thank you
for bein' a friend ♪
3
00:00:06,772 --> 00:00:10,175
♪ travel down the road
and back again ♪
4
00:00:10,243 --> 00:00:12,144
♪ your heart is true ♪
5
00:00:12,211 --> 00:00:16,981
♪ you're a pal
and a confidante ♪
6
00:00:17,050 --> 00:00:20,452
♪ and if you threw
a party ♪
7
00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:24,456
♪ invited everyone
you knew ♪
8
00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:26,258
♪ you would see ♪
9
00:00:26,325 --> 00:00:28,960
♪ the biggest gift
would be from me ♪
10
00:00:29,028 --> 00:00:31,029
♪ and the card attached
would say ♪
11
00:00:31,097 --> 00:00:33,365
♪ thank you
for bein' a friend ♪
12
00:00:33,433 --> 00:00:35,400
♪ thank you
for bein' a friend ♪
13
00:00:35,468 --> 00:00:39,003
♪ thank you
for bein' a friend ♪♪
14
00:00:45,078 --> 00:00:48,012
Captioning made possible by
witt/thomas/harris productions,
cbs television network,
15
00:00:48,081 --> 00:00:50,949
And 1992 nci caption club/
grantsmanship
16
00:01:04,830 --> 00:01:07,966
I just can't believe
it took us seven months
17
00:01:08,033 --> 00:01:10,469
To come up with
this grand reopening party.
18
00:01:10,536 --> 00:01:13,572
It's going to be
such a big weekend
for us.
19
00:01:13,639 --> 00:01:15,974
I'm going to
scrub that kitchen
from top to bottom.
20
00:01:16,041 --> 00:01:20,145
It'll be so clean,
you can eat off
the kitchen floor.
21
00:01:20,213 --> 00:01:22,814
No, no, I want to sit
at a table.
22
00:01:24,550 --> 00:01:26,551
Sorry,
- shady pines flashback.
23
00:01:28,154 --> 00:01:29,954
Hey, I'm not taking
any chances.
24
00:01:30,022 --> 00:01:33,958
I even got rat poison
for out by the dumpster.
25
00:01:34,026 --> 00:01:37,829
Very nice. It's good
to see everybody
standing around.
26
00:01:37,896 --> 00:01:39,998
We got this
news crew coming.
27
00:01:40,065 --> 00:01:42,134
We got to work
as a team.
28
00:01:42,201 --> 00:01:44,102
What can I do to help?
29
00:01:44,170 --> 00:01:47,205
Lock yourself in your room
till Monday.
30
00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:48,507
Oh, I get it.
31
00:01:48,574 --> 00:01:50,008
Everybody thinks
that dumb rose
32
00:01:50,075 --> 00:01:51,943
Is going to do
something stupid
33
00:01:52,011 --> 00:01:53,445
And mess up
our opening.
34
00:01:53,513 --> 00:01:57,449
Don't think I don't know
what my nickname is
around here,
35
00:01:57,517 --> 00:01:58,783
And it really hurts.
36
00:01:58,851 --> 00:02:02,521
Oh, look,
gilligan has feelings.
37
00:02:02,588 --> 00:02:04,956
What would you say
if I told you
38
00:02:05,024 --> 00:02:06,458
That I got
gerald davenport,
39
00:02:06,526 --> 00:02:07,959
Florida's most acclaimed
restaurant critic,
40
00:02:08,027 --> 00:02:10,028
To come here
tomorrow night?
41
00:02:10,095 --> 00:02:13,532
What would you say
to little gilligan then?
42
00:02:13,599 --> 00:02:17,402
Well, I'd say
good work,
little buddy.
43
00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:20,172
Oh, no. Not gerald
"the finer diner"
davenport.
44
00:02:20,239 --> 00:02:22,474
I didn't catch
his middle name,
45
00:02:22,542 --> 00:02:24,909
But he is
a restaurant critic.
46
00:02:24,977 --> 00:02:26,978
The finer diner's
the name of his column.
47
00:02:27,046 --> 00:02:28,480
I hate that little runt.
48
00:02:28,548 --> 00:02:31,283
He gave me
the worst review
of my life.
49
00:02:31,350 --> 00:02:32,284
What did he say?
50
00:02:32,351 --> 00:02:35,187
He said my cooking
was banal.
51
00:02:35,254 --> 00:02:36,254
Oh.
52
00:02:36,322 --> 00:02:40,425
And when I looked it up,
boy, was I mad.
53
00:02:40,493 --> 00:02:44,062
I would never have invited
the man if I'd known.
54
00:02:44,129 --> 00:02:45,497
Hey, don't sweat it.
55
00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:47,499
Some guys get real macho
about these things,
56
00:02:47,567 --> 00:02:48,966
But, hey, I'm over it.
57
00:02:49,034 --> 00:02:52,970
If he thinks msalads
are banal, they're banal.
Who cares?
58
00:02:53,038 --> 00:02:56,174
I always did think
the salads were
kind of plain.
59
00:02:56,242 --> 00:02:57,676
I'll cut you, man.
60
00:02:57,743 --> 00:02:58,776
Whoa, whoa!
61
00:02:58,844 --> 00:02:59,844
Chuy, chuy!
62
00:03:02,715 --> 00:03:05,450
I'm so sorry
the airline
lost your bag.
63
00:03:05,518 --> 00:03:06,951
We'll send it
right up
64
00:03:07,019 --> 00:03:09,120
Just as soon
as they deliver it.
65
00:03:09,188 --> 00:03:11,456
I own a chain
of travel agencies,
66
00:03:11,524 --> 00:03:13,458
And it's refreshing
to meet someone
67
00:03:13,526 --> 00:03:15,627
As bright
and on the ball as you.
68
00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:17,962
By the way,
that's a most
interesting brooch.
69
00:03:18,030 --> 00:03:19,130
Amethyst?
70
00:03:19,198 --> 00:03:20,365
No. Lutheran.
71
00:03:25,003 --> 00:03:29,173
Of course, the pin
has no religious
significance.
72
00:03:30,209 --> 00:03:32,277
It's just
a little duck.
73
00:03:35,047 --> 00:03:36,448
Oh, yes, well...
74
00:03:36,515 --> 00:03:38,350
It's right up
those stairs.
75
00:03:38,417 --> 00:03:39,618
Thank you.
76
00:03:39,685 --> 00:03:42,487
I'm really nervous
about this food critic
coming here.
77
00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:43,955
Oh, we all are,
chuy.
78
00:03:44,022 --> 00:03:46,491
Look at sophia.
She's a basket case.
79
00:03:52,598 --> 00:03:54,932
You know, I'm not
so upset now
80
00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:57,502
About missing
that king tut exhibit.
81
00:04:00,005 --> 00:04:03,441
Chuy, that
negative review
was a long time ago.
82
00:04:03,509 --> 00:04:04,942
He's written
thousands since.
83
00:04:05,010 --> 00:04:06,911
Probably didn't even
remember you.
84
00:04:06,979 --> 00:04:09,947
Good evening.
My name is...
85
00:04:10,015 --> 00:04:12,484
Chuy castillos.
86
00:04:12,551 --> 00:04:15,453
Oh, my gosh.
What a coincidence.
87
00:04:15,521 --> 00:04:17,922
Our cook is named
chuy castillos.
88
00:04:17,990 --> 00:04:20,825
Isn't that
something?
89
00:04:20,893 --> 00:04:23,628
Hey, davenport.
It's been
a long time.
90
00:04:23,696 --> 00:04:26,964
Well, I still remember
your last meal vividly.
91
00:04:27,032 --> 00:04:30,968
Didn't you get
that postcard
from my colon,
92
00:04:31,036 --> 00:04:33,605
"wish you were here"?
93
00:04:36,776 --> 00:04:39,076
Well, I think you'll
be very surprised
94
00:04:39,144 --> 00:04:42,880
By the meal I have
prepared for you
tonight.
95
00:04:42,948 --> 00:04:44,482
Does it involve food,
96
00:04:44,550 --> 00:04:49,053
Or will I be making
another run for the border?
97
00:04:53,125 --> 00:04:57,329
Why, that cranky,
little stuck-up troll...
98
00:04:57,396 --> 00:05:03,401
I think I'm in love.
99
00:05:03,468 --> 00:05:04,402
Ahem.
100
00:05:04,469 --> 00:05:05,903
Well, mr. Davenport,
101
00:05:05,970 --> 00:05:08,972
How's that
lobster newburg tonight?
102
00:05:10,975 --> 00:05:13,110
Uh, mr. Davenport?
103
00:05:15,380 --> 00:05:16,547
Hello.
104
00:05:18,483 --> 00:05:19,983
Hello, mr. Da--
105
00:05:24,489 --> 00:05:26,624
Uh-oh.
106
00:05:27,992 --> 00:05:32,663
Uh, well,
I guess that meal's
pretty good then, huh?
107
00:05:33,665 --> 00:05:34,799
Ooh!
108
00:05:36,435 --> 00:05:38,869
Thank you, sir.
You're too kind.
109
00:05:38,937 --> 00:05:40,871
Well, you enjoy your meal.
110
00:05:40,939 --> 00:05:43,407
I'm just going to
go back here.
111
00:05:43,475 --> 00:05:45,976
Oh, my god.
112
00:05:46,044 --> 00:05:47,311
Chuy, what's wrong?
113
00:05:47,378 --> 00:05:49,279
It's davenport, he's gone.
114
00:05:49,347 --> 00:05:50,280
Gone where?
115
00:05:50,348 --> 00:05:52,716
You know,
to a better place.
116
00:05:52,784 --> 00:05:53,918
Where?
117
00:05:53,985 --> 00:05:55,352
The fountainbleau.
118
00:05:56,621 --> 00:06:00,357
He's trying to tell you
the guy is dead, you moron.
119
00:06:00,425 --> 00:06:01,892
Dead?
How can that be?
120
00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:04,227
He was fine
five minutes ago.
121
00:06:04,295 --> 00:06:06,229
Look, I took his pulse.
122
00:06:06,297 --> 00:06:09,299
It's not too tough
to count up to zero.
123
00:06:09,367 --> 00:06:11,869
Why is it
all the cute guys
124
00:06:11,937 --> 00:06:13,370
Are either married
or dead?
125
00:06:13,438 --> 00:06:15,906
We can't
let this ruin
the grand opening.
126
00:06:15,974 --> 00:06:18,375
We've got to
get the body
out of there
127
00:06:18,443 --> 00:06:20,110
Before someone
notices it.
128
00:06:20,178 --> 00:06:21,912
Sophia, you
create a diversion
129
00:06:21,980 --> 00:06:23,413
For the other
guests.
130
00:06:23,482 --> 00:06:24,582
Like what?
131
00:06:24,649 --> 00:06:26,917
Tell them
there are topless
volleyball players
132
00:06:26,985 --> 00:06:28,586
On the beach.
133
00:06:28,653 --> 00:06:29,587
Got it.
134
00:06:29,654 --> 00:06:30,921
You sure
you've got it?
135
00:06:30,989 --> 00:06:33,423
Yeah, yeah, I got it.
Topless volleyball players.
136
00:06:33,492 --> 00:06:34,492
O.K.
137
00:06:43,434 --> 00:06:45,870
Hey, look,
out on the beach,
138
00:06:45,937 --> 00:06:47,371
A dead body.
139
00:06:47,438 --> 00:06:48,438
No way.
140
00:06:58,950 --> 00:07:01,451
Get the cart,
get the cart.
141
00:07:10,461 --> 00:07:12,429
Oh, real smooth, sophia.
142
00:07:12,497 --> 00:07:14,832
[imitating sophia]
look, a dead body.
143
00:07:16,501 --> 00:07:18,903
Hey, what's going on
in the dining room?
144
00:07:18,970 --> 00:07:20,270
Mr. Davenport,
you all right?
145
00:07:20,338 --> 00:07:21,304
He's dead.
146
00:07:21,372 --> 00:07:23,373
Ooh! Oh, my god!
147
00:07:23,441 --> 00:07:26,911
Oh, man!
I don't want to
touch a dead guy.
148
00:07:26,978 --> 00:07:28,879
I don't want to touch
the unliving.
149
00:07:28,947 --> 00:07:30,180
Get hold
of yourself.
150
00:07:30,248 --> 00:07:32,382
Yeah, but it's
a dead dude,
151
00:07:32,450 --> 00:07:34,418
And he's touching
our stuff.
152
00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:36,854
A man has died here.
153
00:07:36,922 --> 00:07:39,857
I think we should have
a moment of silence
154
00:07:39,925 --> 00:07:41,825
To honor our fellow
human being.
155
00:07:41,893 --> 00:07:42,860
Yeah, yeah.
156
00:07:42,928 --> 00:07:43,894
Don't you?
157
00:07:44,930 --> 00:07:46,697
[telephone rings]
158
00:07:48,199 --> 00:07:49,867
Golden palace.
159
00:07:49,935 --> 00:07:51,869
Yes, as a matter of fact,
160
00:07:51,937 --> 00:07:55,706
A table has just opened
in the dining room.
161
00:07:59,444 --> 00:08:02,613
At least he'll
never call your food
banal again.
162
00:08:02,681 --> 00:08:04,882
I had nothing
to do with this.
163
00:08:04,950 --> 00:08:06,884
There's nothing wrong
with my lobster newburg.
164
00:08:06,952 --> 00:08:09,887
I make it the way
I always make it. Look--
165
00:08:09,955 --> 00:08:10,888
Cream...
166
00:08:10,956 --> 00:08:12,389
Sherry...
167
00:08:12,457 --> 00:08:13,791
Rat poison.
168
00:08:16,861 --> 00:08:18,896
Oh, my god.
It was a mistake.
169
00:08:18,964 --> 00:08:22,432
It looks
- just like cornstarch.
170
00:08:22,500 --> 00:08:24,602
Oh, my god,
I've killed a man.
171
00:08:24,669 --> 00:08:26,103
I killed davenport.
172
00:08:26,170 --> 00:08:29,172
I must have subconsciously
wanted him dead.
173
00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:30,540
Look, don't jump
to conclusions.
174
00:08:30,609 --> 00:08:32,542
This was
a very old man.
175
00:08:32,611 --> 00:08:35,045
Look, I know
somebody at the
coroner's office.
176
00:08:35,113 --> 00:08:37,547
I'm just going
to run upstairs
and call him.
177
00:08:37,616 --> 00:08:40,050
Maybe we can keep
this thing quiet.
178
00:08:40,118 --> 00:08:42,086
And I better
tell blanche.
179
00:08:42,153 --> 00:08:43,587
Boy, it's sad.
180
00:08:43,655 --> 00:08:47,091
You work hard
all your life
and for what?
181
00:08:47,158 --> 00:08:51,095
It's times like this
that make you stop
and ponder--
182
00:08:51,162 --> 00:08:56,166
Wow. Nice rolex.
183
00:08:56,234 --> 00:08:58,669
Here's another
of our owners,
rose nylund.
184
00:08:58,737 --> 00:09:01,672
Rose, this is
the channel 3 news team
185
00:09:01,740 --> 00:09:03,674
Here to cover
our reopening.
186
00:09:03,742 --> 00:09:06,677
Now, rose here
was single-handedly
responsible
187
00:09:06,745 --> 00:09:09,680
For getting
that highly acclaimed
restaurant critic
188
00:09:09,748 --> 00:09:12,149
Mr.Gerald davenport
here to the hotel.
189
00:09:12,216 --> 00:09:13,183
Impressive.
190
00:09:13,251 --> 00:09:15,152
Oh, it was
nothing, really.
191
00:09:15,219 --> 00:09:18,822
Don't mention it.
Please don't mention it.
192
00:09:18,890 --> 00:09:20,323
She's just being modest.
193
00:09:20,391 --> 00:09:23,360
Hey, I don't see
mr. Gerald davenport
around anywhere.
194
00:09:23,427 --> 00:09:25,362
Did he like his food?
195
00:09:25,429 --> 00:09:28,431
Two bites
and he was in heaven.
196
00:09:33,772 --> 00:09:36,707
Well, if you'll
follow me to the kitchen,
197
00:09:36,775 --> 00:09:39,710
I'll introduce you
to our chef chuy castillos.
198
00:09:39,778 --> 00:09:42,780
Give me two seconds
to straighten up.
199
00:09:48,019 --> 00:09:50,721
Quick, get
tommy toe-tag
into the freezer.
200
00:09:50,789 --> 00:09:52,790
The joint's lousy
with newsies.
201
00:09:53,792 --> 00:09:55,726
And hurry up.
202
00:09:55,794 --> 00:09:56,794
Hurry.
203
00:10:02,867 --> 00:10:06,303
And this is our kitchen,
where our chef chuy
204
00:10:06,370 --> 00:10:08,405
Prepares his
culinary surprises.
205
00:10:08,472 --> 00:10:09,472
Ho!
206
00:10:12,844 --> 00:10:15,779
In the seven months
we've been here,
207
00:10:15,847 --> 00:10:17,781
There's been
only one complaint.
208
00:10:17,849 --> 00:10:19,249
Well, as
- investigative reporters,
209
00:10:19,317 --> 00:10:22,285
I'm sure you wouldn't
want to miss
210
00:10:22,353 --> 00:10:24,287
The tacky makeshift
living quarters
211
00:10:24,355 --> 00:10:27,791
We have for our
latino employees
in the back.
212
00:10:27,859 --> 00:10:31,228
They got me living
in squalor back here.
213
00:10:31,295 --> 00:10:34,231
It'll be great
on the 11:00 news.
214
00:10:35,433 --> 00:10:38,869
Dead? You mean
he dropped dead
just like that?
215
00:10:38,937 --> 00:10:41,805
Lord, why does everything
happen to me?
216
00:10:41,873 --> 00:10:44,208
Now we got a corpse
in the freezer,
217
00:10:44,275 --> 00:10:46,710
A camera crew
snooping around the hotel,
218
00:10:46,778 --> 00:10:49,213
And a travel agent
whose bad recommendation
219
00:10:49,280 --> 00:10:52,116
Could just ruin
our reopening. What next?
220
00:10:52,183 --> 00:10:54,251
Al tucker,
health inspector.
221
00:11:11,635 --> 00:11:13,736
It's time
fofor your quarterly
inspection--
222
00:11:13,804 --> 00:11:15,371
Check
the refrigerators,
freezers.
223
00:11:16,807 --> 00:11:18,741
Rose, did you hear that?
224
00:11:18,809 --> 00:11:21,911
Health inspector
wants to check the freezer.
225
00:11:21,979 --> 00:11:23,913
I'm way ahead of you.
226
00:11:23,981 --> 00:11:26,682
Can I get you something
before we begin--
227
00:11:26,750 --> 00:11:27,683
Coffee? Tea?
228
00:11:27,751 --> 00:11:28,684
No, thanks.
229
00:11:28,752 --> 00:11:31,554
I just need to check
your walk-in.
230
00:11:31,621 --> 00:11:33,689
Well, I'm not
at all surprised.
231
00:11:33,757 --> 00:11:36,159
If there's one thing
men like to check,
232
00:11:36,227 --> 00:11:38,194
It's my walk-in...
233
00:11:38,262 --> 00:11:41,197
Not to mention
my talkin'...
234
00:11:41,265 --> 00:11:43,666
And my lovin'...
235
00:11:43,734 --> 00:11:45,001
I--I...
236
00:11:45,069 --> 00:11:47,703
See, I meant
your walk-in freezer.
237
00:11:47,771 --> 00:11:49,705
Well, I know
what you meant,
238
00:11:49,773 --> 00:11:52,208
But I can't
let you do that.
239
00:11:52,276 --> 00:11:54,143
Well, you're
going to have to
240
00:11:54,211 --> 00:11:56,645
Or I'll be forced
to close down
the restaurant.
241
00:11:56,713 --> 00:12:00,216
Oh, mr. Tucker,
please don't put me
in this position.
242
00:12:00,284 --> 00:12:01,717
And that's not something
243
00:12:01,785 --> 00:12:04,120
You'll hear blanche
say every day.
244
00:12:04,188 --> 00:12:08,358
Well, I guess
I could start
with the refrigerator.
245
00:12:08,425 --> 00:12:10,226
Why don't you
just get yourself
246
00:12:10,294 --> 00:12:12,228
A glass of fresh
orange juice?
247
00:12:12,296 --> 00:12:16,199
You know, it's so nice
how fresh juice
tastes so sensual
248
00:12:16,267 --> 00:12:17,700
Without being caloric.
249
00:12:17,768 --> 00:12:18,902
Yeah, like bananas--
250
00:12:18,969 --> 00:12:21,871
A healthy romp through
the world of fruit
251
00:12:21,939 --> 00:12:23,907
Without the hangover
of candied snacks.
252
00:12:23,974 --> 00:12:26,142
Or how about
a cheese ball?
253
00:12:26,210 --> 00:12:27,643
What are you
talking about?
254
00:12:27,711 --> 00:12:29,178
I'm going to level
with you.
255
00:12:29,246 --> 00:12:30,679
I'm a lusty woman--
256
00:12:30,747 --> 00:12:33,582
A lusty, busty
cowgirl that likes
to ride all night.
257
00:12:46,897 --> 00:12:50,066
Oh, there you are.
258
00:12:50,134 --> 00:12:52,768
And your cook
just took off somewhere.
259
00:12:52,836 --> 00:12:55,338
Is there something
going on at this hotel?
260
00:12:56,473 --> 00:13:00,076
Well, I'm probably not
supposed to tell you this,
261
00:13:00,144 --> 00:13:03,679
But salaman rushdie
is in 205...
262
00:13:05,282 --> 00:13:07,683
And he's with
joan van ark.
263
00:13:07,751 --> 00:13:09,352
Of knots landing?
264
00:13:09,420 --> 00:13:10,420
Come on.
265
00:13:12,957 --> 00:13:16,859
Oh, I see the airline
just dropped off
my luggage.
266
00:13:16,927 --> 00:13:21,264
Roland, would you please
take this up to my room?
267
00:13:21,332 --> 00:13:22,898
It would be
my pleasure.
268
00:13:22,967 --> 00:13:25,969
Don't have any cash
right now. Tip you later.
269
00:13:26,036 --> 00:13:28,604
Don't worry about it.
No problem at all.
270
00:13:28,672 --> 00:13:32,175
Why do I always
have to carry the stiffs?
271
00:13:34,011 --> 00:13:35,044
Gee...
272
00:13:35,112 --> 00:13:36,912
My goodness.
273
00:13:43,620 --> 00:13:45,554
Oh, no. Where is it?
274
00:13:45,622 --> 00:13:47,357
Where did it go?
275
00:13:47,424 --> 00:13:50,559
Blanche, I lost it.
I lost the suitcase.
276
00:13:50,627 --> 00:13:52,061
What? Oh, no!
277
00:13:52,129 --> 00:13:54,530
We've got the media
roaming the hotel,
278
00:13:54,598 --> 00:13:56,565
A health inspector
in the kitchen.
279
00:13:56,633 --> 00:13:58,901
Now you tell me
you lost the body.
280
00:13:58,969 --> 00:14:01,104
What are we
going to do?
281
00:14:01,171 --> 00:14:02,538
Well, you know,
282
00:14:02,606 --> 00:14:06,642
Maybe we should
just try to have
fun with this.
283
00:14:09,513 --> 00:14:11,481
Mr. Mitchelson?
284
00:14:11,548 --> 00:14:12,948
Look, I can't do this.
285
00:14:13,017 --> 00:14:15,985
Hey, we got to get
that suitcase back.
286
00:14:16,053 --> 00:14:19,989
Since I was a kid,
I've had this thing
about death--
287
00:14:20,057 --> 00:14:21,491
People, animals, insects.
288
00:14:21,558 --> 00:14:23,493
Once when I was 5,
289
00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:26,295
My pet hamster marvin
got out--
290
00:14:26,363 --> 00:14:29,232
As much as we love
a good childhood story...
291
00:14:29,299 --> 00:14:31,000
Save it
for your shrink.
292
00:14:31,068 --> 00:14:33,269
We've got work
to do.
293
00:14:36,073 --> 00:14:37,507
Oh, he's in the shower.
294
00:14:37,574 --> 00:14:38,508
Oh, that's perfect.
295
00:14:38,575 --> 00:14:39,975
You know how
men are.
296
00:14:40,044 --> 00:14:41,610
They just take
forever...
297
00:14:41,678 --> 00:14:46,649
Lathering up
their strong,
well-muscled arms
298
00:14:46,716 --> 00:14:49,685
And letting the soap
run in rivulets
299
00:14:49,753 --> 00:14:51,687
Down over
the washboard
pples
300
00:14:51,755 --> 00:14:53,222
Of their tight,
taut--
301
00:14:53,290 --> 00:14:54,924
That's enough, blanche.
302
00:14:54,991 --> 00:14:57,293
Oh, I'm back,
I'm back.
303
00:14:58,595 --> 00:15:02,532
We can't go wandering around
the hotel with a dead man.
304
00:15:02,599 --> 00:15:04,934
Let's wrap him
in a blanket.
305
00:15:05,001 --> 00:15:06,035
Good.
306
00:15:06,103 --> 00:15:08,104
Oh, here's one.
307
00:15:09,606 --> 00:15:11,974
Oh, man.
This is so nasty.
308
00:15:12,042 --> 00:15:13,976
This is nasty,
nasty, nasty, nasty.
309
00:15:14,044 --> 00:15:14,977
Here.
310
00:15:15,045 --> 00:15:17,447
Oh, it's on me.
It's on me.
311
00:15:17,514 --> 00:15:19,982
Don't you blame me, now.
It's rose's fault.
312
00:15:20,050 --> 00:15:21,984
What do you mean
my fault?
313
00:15:22,052 --> 00:15:24,420
You're the one
that invited davenport
to the hotel.
314
00:15:24,488 --> 00:15:26,622
It's still on me.
315
00:15:26,690 --> 00:15:27,990
I've had it with you.
316
00:15:28,058 --> 00:15:29,492
I don't like this, either,
317
00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:31,961
But there are times
in your life
318
00:15:32,028 --> 00:15:34,997
When you just have to
face your fears.
319
00:15:35,065 --> 00:15:35,998
No, wait.
320
00:15:36,066 --> 00:15:37,533
Is someone
out there?
321
00:15:37,601 --> 00:15:39,335
Oh, lord. Oh, lord.
322
00:15:41,572 --> 00:15:44,240
Hide me. Hide me.
323
00:15:51,415 --> 00:15:53,416
What's going on
out here?
324
00:16:00,090 --> 00:16:01,491
Hi there, tiger.
325
00:16:01,558 --> 00:16:03,526
[growls]
326
00:16:03,594 --> 00:16:06,729
What are you doing
in my bed?
327
00:16:06,796 --> 00:16:10,633
Well, let's just say
I'm delivering
some room service.
328
00:16:11,701 --> 00:16:13,636
What?
329
00:16:13,703 --> 00:16:16,472
Isn't that what
you've been after all along?
330
00:16:16,540 --> 00:16:19,942
I mean, oh, "my, isn't that
an interesting brooch."
331
00:16:20,010 --> 00:16:24,480
Please, I don't have to
have a house fall on me,
332
00:16:24,548 --> 00:16:26,115
Then again, who does?
333
00:16:27,651 --> 00:16:30,186
There's
that wonderful
sense of humor.
334
00:16:33,557 --> 00:16:37,493
Ah, your hand
is so smooth...
335
00:16:37,561 --> 00:16:39,061
And cold.
336
00:16:40,063 --> 00:16:43,499
Here, let me
warm it up for you.
337
00:16:43,567 --> 00:16:46,335
Hey, nice rolex.
338
00:16:46,403 --> 00:16:50,005
Uh, you know what really
turns me on?
339
00:16:50,073 --> 00:16:52,007
What? What?
340
00:16:52,075 --> 00:16:54,477
A man
with blow-dried hair.
341
00:16:54,545 --> 00:16:55,511
Really?
342
00:16:55,579 --> 00:16:56,646
Oh, yes.
343
00:16:56,713 --> 00:16:58,514
O.K., o.K.,
don't move.
344
00:16:58,582 --> 00:16:59,515
Uh-uh.
345
00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:01,384
Thank you.
346
00:17:04,588 --> 00:17:07,490
Great job, rose.
I could hug you,
347
00:17:07,558 --> 00:17:09,592
But you smell
like dead.
348
00:17:11,261 --> 00:17:12,161
Come here.
349
00:17:12,229 --> 00:17:13,696
Go to your right.
350
00:17:13,763 --> 00:17:15,331
No, this way.
351
00:17:18,034 --> 00:17:20,436
[tv reporter]
oh, there you are.
352
00:17:20,504 --> 00:17:21,537
Go back.
353
00:17:22,539 --> 00:17:23,972
In the laundry chute.
354
00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:25,974
The laundry chute.
355
00:17:26,042 --> 00:17:26,942
Aah.
356
00:17:27,010 --> 00:17:27,976
Sorry.
357
00:17:28,044 --> 00:17:30,913
Get him down there.
Get him down there.
358
00:17:30,980 --> 00:17:33,249
We have a lot
of work to do,
359
00:17:33,317 --> 00:17:35,050
A lot of things
to find.
360
00:17:35,118 --> 00:17:37,086
Everything's on
the up and up here.
361
00:17:37,153 --> 00:17:38,588
We have nothing
to hide.
362
00:17:46,830 --> 00:17:50,266
O.K., we're going to need
a diversion for the guests.
363
00:17:50,334 --> 00:17:52,501
Don't worry.
This time I got it--
364
00:17:52,569 --> 00:17:54,837
Topless
volleyball players
out on the beach.
365
00:17:57,841 --> 00:17:59,242
Hey, everyone,
look--
366
00:17:59,309 --> 00:18:01,810
Dead
volleyball player
in the blanket.
367
00:18:05,382 --> 00:18:08,451
I did it again,
didn't I?
368
00:18:13,857 --> 00:18:14,790
Blanche, blanche.
369
00:18:14,858 --> 00:18:16,292
Not now. Not now.
370
00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:17,793
Hold it. Hold it.
371
00:18:17,861 --> 00:18:18,794
What?
372
00:18:18,862 --> 00:18:20,296
I got to rest.
373
00:18:20,364 --> 00:18:21,264
O.K.
374
00:18:21,331 --> 00:18:23,031
I was a lot younger
375
00:18:23,099 --> 00:18:25,834
When I
used to do this
back in sicily.
376
00:18:27,937 --> 00:18:31,340
He can't just have
gotten up and walked away.
377
00:18:31,408 --> 00:18:32,341
Aah!
- Aah!
378
00:18:32,409 --> 00:18:33,876
Oh, there you are.
379
00:18:33,943 --> 00:18:34,843
Aah!
- Aah!
380
00:18:34,911 --> 00:18:35,878
Rose.
381
00:18:35,945 --> 00:18:36,845
Aah!
- Aah!
382
00:18:36,913 --> 00:18:38,381
What happened to you?
383
00:18:38,448 --> 00:18:40,816
I not only
blow-dried my hair,
384
00:18:40,884 --> 00:18:42,285
I put in mousse.
385
00:18:42,352 --> 00:18:45,254
And why did you
take my blanket?
386
00:18:45,322 --> 00:18:47,523
What's going on here?
387
00:18:47,591 --> 00:18:51,327
I don't know,
and I'm as shocked
as you are.
388
00:18:51,395 --> 00:18:54,797
Listen, I think it's time
we told e truth.
389
00:18:54,864 --> 00:18:56,332
Rose, what are you doing?
390
00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:58,834
No, we can't live
this lie any longer.
391
00:18:58,902 --> 00:18:59,835
Rose, rose.
392
00:18:59,903 --> 00:19:01,704
This man here is drunk.
393
00:19:02,706 --> 00:19:04,774
Yeah, he's drunk.
- Yeah,
he's drunk.
394
00:19:04,841 --> 00:19:07,109
Pickled, pie-eyed,
soused, wasted.
395
00:19:07,177 --> 00:19:09,211
Practically
embalmed.
396
00:19:10,814 --> 00:19:13,716
You were doing
better without me,
weren't you?
397
00:19:13,784 --> 00:19:15,785
Now, you all know
this man
398
00:19:15,852 --> 00:19:18,253
As noted
restaurant critic
gerald davenport,
399
00:19:18,322 --> 00:19:21,390
But to local bartenders,
he's pure profit.
400
00:19:21,458 --> 00:19:23,292
Oh, I'll say.
401
00:19:23,360 --> 00:19:25,294
Yeah,
and when he's drunk,
402
00:19:25,362 --> 00:19:27,863
He thinks everything
tastes banal.
403
00:19:27,931 --> 00:19:29,532
Well, this is horrible.
404
00:19:29,599 --> 00:19:30,899
Well, not entirely
405
00:19:30,967 --> 00:19:33,803
Because it gives us
at the golden palace
406
00:19:33,870 --> 00:19:35,270
A chance
to implement
407
00:19:35,339 --> 00:19:36,706
Our new designated
driver program.
408
00:19:36,773 --> 00:19:39,308
From now on,
any of our
restaurant patrons
409
00:19:39,376 --> 00:19:40,810
Who's had too much
410
00:19:40,877 --> 00:19:42,445
Will be safely
escorted home.
411
00:19:42,512 --> 00:19:43,512
That's right.
412
00:19:45,382 --> 00:19:47,817
Um, excuse me,
mr. Davenport, sir,
413
00:19:47,884 --> 00:19:50,853
Do you think you can
drive yourself home tonight?
414
00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:52,855
See, that's
the first step,
415
00:19:52,922 --> 00:19:54,390
Admitting you need help.
416
00:19:54,458 --> 00:19:56,892
That's so true.
That's so true.
417
00:19:56,960 --> 00:19:58,093
What's that?
418
00:19:58,161 --> 00:20:01,897
You want me
to keep your rolex
for safekeeping?
419
00:20:01,965 --> 00:20:03,432
Get out of here.
420
00:20:09,806 --> 00:20:12,808
I thought this day
would never end.
421
00:20:12,876 --> 00:20:14,810
Chuy, where have you been?
422
00:20:14,878 --> 00:20:16,812
Out walking the beach,
thinking.
423
00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:19,815
I mean, I may have
killed a man.
424
00:20:19,883 --> 00:20:22,451
Hey, look, this
has touched all of us.
425
00:20:22,519 --> 00:20:24,319
Some of us are hoping
426
00:20:24,388 --> 00:20:27,423
We'll be able to scrub
it the hell off.
427
00:20:27,491 --> 00:20:28,957
Everybody, everybody,
good news.
428
00:20:29,025 --> 00:20:30,959
According to
the coroner's report,
429
00:20:31,027 --> 00:20:34,597
Mr. Davenport died
of a massive coronary...
430
00:20:34,664 --> 00:20:35,564
All right!
431
00:20:35,632 --> 00:20:36,565
Wonderful.
432
00:20:36,633 --> 00:20:37,833
That's great.
433
00:20:37,901 --> 00:20:39,835
So chuy didn't kill
anybody.
434
00:20:39,903 --> 00:20:41,437
They tested
the food.
435
00:20:41,505 --> 00:20:45,007
There was not a
trace of rat poison
whatsoever.
436
00:20:45,074 --> 00:20:47,242
That's wonderful,
wonderful.
437
00:20:47,310 --> 00:20:49,545
Looks like
everything ended up
working out o.K.
438
00:20:49,613 --> 00:20:50,813
I'll say it did,
439
00:20:50,881 --> 00:20:53,315
And because of our
designated driver program,
440
00:20:53,383 --> 00:20:55,851
Mr. Mitchelson said
he's going to recommend
our hotel
441
00:20:55,919 --> 00:20:57,553
To all his travel agents.
442
00:20:57,621 --> 00:21:01,023
And the health inspector
said we passed
with flying colors.
443
00:21:01,090 --> 00:21:02,958
Everybody
got something
out of this.
444
00:21:03,026 --> 00:21:04,393
You're
telling me.
445
00:21:04,461 --> 00:21:06,896
Ask me
what time it is.
446
00:21:06,963 --> 00:21:09,298
Ask me
what time it is.
447
00:21:09,365 --> 00:21:12,367
Captioning performed by
the national captioning
institute, inc.
448
00:21:32,288 --> 00:21:34,690
Well, this all worked out
pretty good.
449
00:21:34,758 --> 00:21:36,224
I'd say all in all
450
00:21:36,292 --> 00:21:39,194
It turned out to be
a pretty good day.
451
00:21:39,262 --> 00:21:40,796
Whee!
452
00:21:41,798 --> 00:21:44,132
All right, sophia,
that's enough.
453
00:21:49,806 --> 00:21:54,242
What, I got to wait
until I'm dead to do this?
454
00:21:54,310 --> 00:21:55,744
Get out of there.
455
00:21:55,812 --> 00:21:57,312
Get that sock off.
31745
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