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1
00:00:00,750 --> 00:00:01,816
Come on, guys.
Let's go!
2
00:00:02,718 --> 00:00:04,618
- Hey.
- Hey.
3
00:00:04,620 --> 00:00:07,755
You all packed up, ready
for a little vacation?
4
00:00:07,757 --> 00:00:09,957
Okay, well, it's not a vacation.
It's a business trip.
5
00:00:09,959 --> 00:00:12,026
And you're sure it's a good idea
to bring the family, right?
6
00:00:12,028 --> 00:00:13,093
I think
it's a great idea.
7
00:00:13,095 --> 00:00:14,461
We're gonna be
in Florida anyway.
8
00:00:14,463 --> 00:00:16,397
Why not take in the
sights? Do it right.
9
00:00:16,399 --> 00:00:19,199
Okay, just remember it's
a business trip first.
10
00:00:19,201 --> 00:00:21,101
No, I am a dad first.
11
00:00:21,103 --> 00:00:22,836
And that's true.
You are a good dad.
12
00:00:22,838 --> 00:00:24,538
No, no, no. I'm a
great dad, all right?
13
00:00:24,540 --> 00:00:25,940
I always look out
for my kids.
14
00:00:25,942 --> 00:00:27,174
Dad, have you seen
my vitamins?
15
00:00:27,176 --> 00:00:28,208
You don't need that crap.
16
00:00:28,210 --> 00:00:29,476
Everything will be taken
care of by the sun.
17
00:00:29,478 --> 00:00:30,945
Does it all.
18
00:00:30,947 --> 00:00:32,313
Go. Hurry up.
19
00:00:32,315 --> 00:00:34,381
So, listen, Saturday, we're
hitting Disney World
20
00:00:34,383 --> 00:00:35,482
if you want to join us.
21
00:00:35,484 --> 00:00:37,584
Oh, that's sweet,
but I'm gonna pass.
22
00:00:37,586 --> 00:00:39,954
I'll be laying out
sipping on a piña colada
23
00:00:39,956 --> 00:00:41,922
from a coconut
bigger than my head.
24
00:00:41,924 --> 00:00:44,024
[ Chuckles ] Every coconut's
bigger than your head.
25
00:00:45,661 --> 00:00:48,162
What? I can't be the first
one to tell you this,
26
00:00:48,164 --> 00:00:49,964
but your head
is freakishly small.
27
00:00:49,966 --> 00:00:51,065
- You don't know this?
- What?
28
00:00:51,067 --> 00:00:52,333
Yes.
29
00:00:52,335 --> 00:00:53,267
Honestly,
if you didn't have hair,
30
00:00:53,269 --> 00:00:55,936
you'd look like
a tan thumb.
31
00:00:55,938 --> 00:00:57,037
Thank you.
Wha--
32
00:00:57,039 --> 00:00:58,339
You just know
what to say.
33
00:00:58,341 --> 00:01:00,007
I'm just throwing it out
there. You're bringing it up.
34
00:01:00,009 --> 00:01:01,542
Hey, Dad, I thought
we were getting
35
00:01:01,544 --> 00:01:02,710
spending money
for the trip.
36
00:01:02,712 --> 00:01:04,244
Yeah,
I gave you 40 bucks.
37
00:01:04,246 --> 00:01:05,379
What am I, Amish?
38
00:01:05,381 --> 00:01:07,047
N-- No.
39
00:01:07,049 --> 00:01:08,582
You're 15, all right?
40
00:01:08,584 --> 00:01:09,550
And you got to learn
to budget.
41
00:01:09,552 --> 00:01:10,517
Figure it out.
Come on.
42
00:01:10,519 --> 00:01:12,119
Hey, listen,
is Rootger coming?
43
00:01:12,121 --> 00:01:14,121
He seemed a little freaked
out about having to fly.
44
00:01:14,123 --> 00:01:15,189
Yeah, he was.
45
00:01:15,191 --> 00:01:16,824
I've never seen him
afraid of anything.
46
00:01:16,826 --> 00:01:17,958
He was all like, uh,
47
00:01:17,960 --> 00:01:19,293
[Foreign accent]
"Uh, maybe we could take bus,
48
00:01:19,295 --> 00:01:21,462
you know?
Drive only 24 hours."
49
00:01:21,464 --> 00:01:25,833
Okay, was that Rootger
or Dracula?
50
00:01:25,835 --> 00:01:28,435
'Cause that was, like, the
worst Dutch accent ever.
51
00:01:28,437 --> 00:01:29,370
I disagree.
52
00:01:29,372 --> 00:01:30,404
Okay.
53
00:01:30,406 --> 00:01:31,505
I'm so excited.
54
00:01:31,507 --> 00:01:32,506
A couple days in Florida,
55
00:01:32,508 --> 00:01:34,675
then off to Italy
for our honeymoon.
56
00:01:34,677 --> 00:01:36,443
Well, I don't see
my sunscreen,
57
00:01:36,445 --> 00:01:37,745
so when we get to Italy,
58
00:01:37,747 --> 00:01:39,513
I'm gonna be bright red
and peeling.
59
00:01:39,515 --> 00:01:41,915
So get ready for lots of
little flakes of dead skin
60
00:01:41,917 --> 00:01:43,183
floating all over you.
61
00:01:43,185 --> 00:01:46,920
Mm, you save that sexy talk
for our first night in Rome.
62
00:01:46,922 --> 00:01:48,722
Besides, I got you
a new sunscreen.
63
00:01:48,724 --> 00:01:49,556
It's right here.
64
00:01:49,558 --> 00:01:50,591
Okay,
you guys ready to go?
65
00:01:50,593 --> 00:01:52,559
SPF 75?!
66
00:01:52,561 --> 00:01:54,461
You know
it has to be 150.
67
00:01:54,463 --> 00:01:57,865
Anything below that
is milk.
68
00:01:57,867 --> 00:02:00,367
Well, then we can just get
some when we get there.
69
00:02:00,369 --> 00:02:02,803
Well, just slap
the 75 on twice.
70
00:02:02,805 --> 00:02:04,805
It's like two coats.
71
00:02:04,807 --> 00:02:06,807
No, it -- it doesn't
work like that.
72
00:02:06,809 --> 00:02:09,576
- Why not?
- We're not painting a fence.
73
00:02:10,646 --> 00:02:11,945
I'm here.
74
00:02:11,947 --> 00:02:14,314
I'm ready to go, and I'm no
longer afraid of flying.
75
00:02:14,316 --> 00:02:16,350
Oh, good for you, honey.
76
00:02:16,352 --> 00:02:17,184
There's nothing to fear.
77
00:02:17,186 --> 00:02:18,585
- It's irrational.
- It is.
78
00:02:18,587 --> 00:02:21,055
Yeah, the idea of being
trapped in a metal tube
79
00:02:21,057 --> 00:02:23,290
as it flies into the
side of a mountain
80
00:02:23,292 --> 00:02:25,392
will not enter my brain.
81
00:02:25,394 --> 00:02:28,495
Good for you.
Let's rock and roll!
82
00:02:28,497 --> 00:02:29,897
I lied.
83
00:02:29,899 --> 00:02:35,202
== Sync by Alice | www.addic7ed.com ==
♪ I am not your ordinary guy ♪
84
00:02:35,204 --> 00:02:37,504
[ Indistinct P.A.
announcement ]
85
00:02:37,506 --> 00:02:39,740
Hey, guys, just make sure you
get your boarding passes out
86
00:02:39,742 --> 00:02:41,742
so when they call us, we're
all ready to go, okay?
87
00:02:41,744 --> 00:02:43,143
Why are we
in different rows?
88
00:02:43,145 --> 00:02:45,045
I booked last minute, so we're
kind of scattered around,
89
00:02:45,047 --> 00:02:45,946
all right?
Don't worry.
90
00:02:45,948 --> 00:02:47,548
We all land together.
91
00:02:47,550 --> 00:02:49,817
Unless, of course, the
plane breaks up midair,
92
00:02:49,819 --> 00:02:52,586
and then we're scattered
around the countryside.
93
00:02:53,789 --> 00:02:56,990
Just watch my stuff. I got to
go to the bathroom, all right?
94
00:02:56,992 --> 00:02:58,992
[ Sighs ]
95
00:02:58,994 --> 00:03:00,260
Hi. Welcome.
96
00:03:00,262 --> 00:03:02,229
Hi. I heard
your announcement
97
00:03:02,231 --> 00:03:04,298
about getting bumped up
to first class.
98
00:03:04,300 --> 00:03:06,333
I was wondering how I --
how I can do that?
99
00:03:06,335 --> 00:03:07,701
Oh, well, you can pay
the difference
100
00:03:07,703 --> 00:03:09,403
or use
frequent-flyer miles.
101
00:03:09,405 --> 00:03:12,906
Okay, well, I don't
have any of those.
102
00:03:12,908 --> 00:03:14,441
Well, unless it's
a special occasion
103
00:03:14,443 --> 00:03:15,642
or a medical emergency,
104
00:03:15,644 --> 00:03:17,244
there's not much
we can do.
105
00:03:17,246 --> 00:03:19,413
Wait. Didn't I hear
someone from your party
106
00:03:19,415 --> 00:03:20,514
talking about
a honeymoon?
107
00:03:20,516 --> 00:03:23,250
Was that you?
108
00:03:23,252 --> 00:03:24,651
Yes! Yes.
109
00:03:24,653 --> 00:03:26,186
Actually,
I just got married.
110
00:03:26,188 --> 00:03:27,121
[ Laughs ]
111
00:03:27,123 --> 00:03:28,622
[ Scoffs ]
Congratulations!
112
00:03:28,624 --> 00:03:29,523
Thank you!
113
00:03:29,525 --> 00:03:30,424
[ Chuckles ]
114
00:03:30,426 --> 00:03:31,425
Well,
is your husband here?
115
00:03:31,427 --> 00:03:33,160
My husband is
in the, um --
116
00:03:33,162 --> 00:03:34,561
in the -- in the bathroom
right now.
117
00:03:34,563 --> 00:03:35,896
He's got a condition.
118
00:03:35,898 --> 00:03:38,165
The doctors call it
"angry colon."
119
00:03:38,167 --> 00:03:39,933
Ooh!
[ Chuckles ]
120
00:03:39,935 --> 00:03:42,336
You know, let me see
what I can do for you.
121
00:03:42,338 --> 00:03:43,604
- Thank -- Oh!
- Sure.
122
00:03:43,606 --> 00:03:45,372
Thank you!
123
00:03:45,908 --> 00:03:47,107
- Ooh!
- Oh!
124
00:03:47,109 --> 00:03:48,575
- I'm -- I'm so sorry.
- No, I'm so sorry.
125
00:03:48,577 --> 00:03:49,910
- No, that was totally my fault.
- No!
126
00:03:49,912 --> 00:03:51,245
I was checking out
Cinnabon over there,
127
00:03:51,247 --> 00:03:52,613
and I-I-I just lost my
mind for a second there.
128
00:03:52,615 --> 00:03:53,614
[ Laughs ]
Sorry.
129
00:03:53,616 --> 00:03:54,748
Let me get this all set
for you.
130
00:03:54,750 --> 00:03:57,151
Well, thank you.
I mean, what a gentleman.
131
00:03:57,153 --> 00:03:58,685
Didn't know they had
any of those left.
132
00:03:58,687 --> 00:04:00,154
There's a few of us.
[ Chuckles ]
133
00:04:00,156 --> 00:04:02,189
You know what it is? We don't
like to make it about us, so...
134
00:04:02,191 --> 00:04:03,991
We just kind of hide
among the idiots.
135
00:04:03,993 --> 00:04:05,259
[ Both chuckle ]
136
00:04:05,261 --> 00:04:06,627
Well,
you mentioned Cinnabon.
137
00:04:06,629 --> 00:04:07,694
Look, I-I just got back
from there.
138
00:04:07,696 --> 00:04:08,762
I got an extra.
139
00:04:08,764 --> 00:04:10,330
I -- Want one?
140
00:04:10,332 --> 00:04:12,199
Yeah, I-I'd like to,
but I'm, uh --
141
00:04:12,201 --> 00:04:13,867
I'm -- I'm -- I'm trying
to cut back, so...
142
00:04:13,869 --> 00:04:15,636
Why?
143
00:04:15,638 --> 00:04:17,237
I don't know.
144
00:04:17,239 --> 00:04:19,840
See? I miss the days where
men would just, like,
145
00:04:19,842 --> 00:04:21,942
eat whatever they wanted,
you know,
146
00:04:21,944 --> 00:04:23,243
instead of
looking in the mirror
147
00:04:23,245 --> 00:04:25,646
- and counting calories.
- Yeah.
148
00:04:25,648 --> 00:04:26,747
But you know --
I-I'm sorry.
149
00:04:26,749 --> 00:04:28,015
Are you, like, a vegan
or something?
150
00:04:28,017 --> 00:04:29,082
No! No!
151
00:04:29,084 --> 00:04:31,051
I don't even like the
sound of the word.
152
00:04:31,053 --> 00:04:32,452
"Vegan"!
153
00:04:34,023 --> 00:04:35,489
Oh, you know what, uh,
154
00:04:35,491 --> 00:04:37,191
I got to get going,
but, uh,
155
00:04:37,193 --> 00:04:39,459
maybe I'll see you on
the plane or something.
156
00:04:39,461 --> 00:04:42,396
- I'd like that.
- Okay. Great.
157
00:04:43,098 --> 00:04:44,298
- What?!
- C'mon!
158
00:04:44,300 --> 00:04:45,799
They are boarding
the plane.
159
00:04:45,801 --> 00:04:47,100
Yeah, they called
first class only.
160
00:04:47,102 --> 00:04:49,903
That's right, and mama
has a surprise for you.
161
00:04:49,905 --> 00:04:51,405
That girl was amazing.
162
00:04:51,407 --> 00:04:53,407
I mean,
we just hit it off.
163
00:04:53,409 --> 00:04:54,541
It was crazy.
164
00:04:54,543 --> 00:04:57,077
Okay, well, I wouldn't
get too attached.
165
00:04:57,079 --> 00:04:58,345
I'm not attached,
all right?
166
00:04:58,347 --> 00:04:59,980
She just said
I was a gentleman.
167
00:04:59,982 --> 00:05:01,582
She loves Cinnabon.
168
00:05:01,584 --> 00:05:03,150
She likes
that I eat meat.
169
00:05:03,152 --> 00:05:04,251
I mean --
170
00:05:04,253 --> 00:05:05,319
Yeah,
I'm pretty locked in.
171
00:05:05,321 --> 00:05:06,520
All right.
172
00:05:07,990 --> 00:05:09,656
These are our seats.
173
00:05:09,658 --> 00:05:11,925
Isn't this great?!
174
00:05:11,927 --> 00:05:14,061
- What?!
- Yes!
175
00:05:14,063 --> 00:05:17,364
I worked my magic to get us
bumped up to first class.
176
00:05:17,366 --> 00:05:19,066
Now, to get these seats,
177
00:05:19,068 --> 00:05:21,235
I kind of had to give the
impression that you and I --
178
00:05:21,237 --> 00:05:23,136
Oh!
Well, look who made it!
179
00:05:23,138 --> 00:05:24,171
- How are you?
- Hi.
180
00:05:24,173 --> 00:05:27,174
Yes. Yes, this is, uh,
my husband...
181
00:05:27,176 --> 00:05:30,811
- Mm-hmm... - who was indisposed
before, but now he is here.
182
00:05:30,813 --> 00:05:32,846
Uh, yes, about that,
183
00:05:32,848 --> 00:05:35,082
if you feel a little
emergency coming on
184
00:05:35,084 --> 00:05:37,084
and you need to move
closer to the restroom,
185
00:05:37,086 --> 00:05:38,151
just let us know.
186
00:05:38,153 --> 00:05:40,587
Okay.
Thanks.
187
00:05:40,589 --> 00:05:43,657
Honey, I had to tell Kristie
about your condition.
188
00:05:43,659 --> 00:05:44,725
My -- My condition?
189
00:05:44,727 --> 00:05:46,760
Yes, you know,
the angry colon thing.
190
00:05:46,762 --> 00:05:47,961
Angry... colon?
191
00:05:47,963 --> 00:05:50,163
My -- My colon is --
My colon's fine.
192
00:05:50,165 --> 00:05:51,365
- It's fine.
- Mm.
193
00:05:51,367 --> 00:05:53,634
Is it, though?
194
00:05:53,636 --> 00:05:56,069
Okay, I got us
some treats. Mm!
195
00:05:56,071 --> 00:05:57,838
- I got cheese sticks, a
Twix bar... - Mm-hmm.
196
00:05:57,840 --> 00:06:00,741
...and a very expensive
bag of airport grapes.
197
00:06:00,743 --> 00:06:03,810
Mmm! Yay, a little picnic
in the sky!
198
00:06:03,812 --> 00:06:06,046
Hey, uh, sorry about
getting upset
199
00:06:06,048 --> 00:06:08,081
about the sunscreen.
I'm -- I'm --
200
00:06:08,083 --> 00:06:10,517
No, no, no, my bad for
getting the wrong kind.
201
00:06:10,519 --> 00:06:11,818
But you know what,
that doesn't matter
202
00:06:11,820 --> 00:06:13,587
because we are...
203
00:06:13,589 --> 00:06:15,188
- going on our honeymoon!
- Going on our honeymoon!
204
00:06:15,190 --> 00:06:16,556
[ Both laugh ]
205
00:06:16,558 --> 00:06:18,325
Uh, excuse me.
I believe that's me.
206
00:06:18,327 --> 00:06:21,662
Oh! Uh, actually,
today is your lucky day.
207
00:06:21,664 --> 00:06:24,264
My wife and I are going
on our honeymoon,
208
00:06:24,266 --> 00:06:26,400
so I will take the middle,
and you can enjoy
209
00:06:26,402 --> 00:06:28,135
all the extra leg room
in the aisle.
210
00:06:28,137 --> 00:06:30,337
Nah, I'm good.
I like the middle.
211
00:06:30,339 --> 00:06:32,172
Excuse me.
That's my seat.
212
00:06:33,442 --> 00:06:35,142
I meet this great girl,
and now I got to pretend
213
00:06:35,144 --> 00:06:36,777
- to be married to you...
- Okay.
214
00:06:36,779 --> 00:06:38,111
...with an angry colon?
215
00:06:38,113 --> 00:06:39,379
I just wanted
to be realistic,
216
00:06:39,381 --> 00:06:40,714
so I came up
with something.
217
00:06:40,716 --> 00:06:41,948
- Realistic?
- Yes.
218
00:06:41,950 --> 00:06:43,984
So, tell me everything.
219
00:06:43,986 --> 00:06:45,218
How did you two meet?
220
00:06:45,220 --> 00:06:47,354
I'm a neurosurgeon.
221
00:06:47,356 --> 00:06:48,355
- Wow!
- Yeah. Yeah.
222
00:06:48,357 --> 00:06:49,389
- Honey.
- No.
223
00:06:49,391 --> 00:06:50,657
You don't have
to tell her that.
224
00:06:50,659 --> 00:06:52,426
No, actually I-I-I do.
225
00:06:52,428 --> 00:06:54,394
See, s-she was
a patient of mine,
226
00:06:54,396 --> 00:06:55,662
and I-I-I fixed her.
227
00:06:55,664 --> 00:06:57,264
She came
with a scrambled brain,
228
00:06:57,266 --> 00:06:58,899
and I got it --
I got it --
229
00:06:58,901 --> 00:07:00,133
I got it working again.
230
00:07:00,135 --> 00:07:01,668
Oh. Yeah, it wasn't
easy, either...
231
00:07:01,670 --> 00:07:03,003
[ Clears throat ] ...'cause
I got big hands,
232
00:07:03,005 --> 00:07:04,471
and as you can see,
her --
233
00:07:04,473 --> 00:07:05,639
her head's
kind of smallish.
234
00:07:05,641 --> 00:07:07,941
Okay.
All right.
235
00:07:07,943 --> 00:07:09,376
But I -- But I got it.
236
00:07:09,378 --> 00:07:11,378
Guys, that is
an incredible story.
237
00:07:11,380 --> 00:07:13,513
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, and that's
pretty much it. So...
238
00:07:13,515 --> 00:07:15,615
Okay, well, these are
our signature cocktails.
239
00:07:15,617 --> 00:07:17,084
Oh! Thank you.
Please enjoy.
240
00:07:17,086 --> 00:07:18,151
- Oh.
- There you go.
241
00:07:18,153 --> 00:07:19,920
Oh, there is
cream in that.
242
00:07:19,922 --> 00:07:21,588
That -- That's fine.
Don't worry about that.
243
00:07:21,590 --> 00:07:22,989
Well, I just hope
that's okay with your --
244
00:07:22,991 --> 00:07:24,291
It's fine.
It's fine. Don't --
245
00:07:24,293 --> 00:07:25,392
Your colon situation.
246
00:07:25,394 --> 00:07:27,461
Ya -- Ya gotta say it?
247
00:07:30,697 --> 00:07:31,796
I hope you had your fun.
248
00:07:31,798 --> 00:07:33,464
I'm not letting
my fake marriage to you
249
00:07:33,466 --> 00:07:35,232
ruin my chances with her,
okay?
250
00:07:35,234 --> 00:07:37,168
Well, if you want to get
busted, go ahead and do it.
251
00:07:37,170 --> 00:07:38,402
What? What's the worst
that can happen?
252
00:07:38,404 --> 00:07:40,604
They throw us back
in coach? Who cares?
253
00:07:40,606 --> 00:07:42,440
We haven't even
taken off yet.
254
00:07:42,442 --> 00:07:44,141
If they find out we lied,
255
00:07:44,143 --> 00:07:45,409
they're gonna kick us
off the plane.
256
00:07:45,411 --> 00:07:47,378
- What?!
- Yes, they do that now.
257
00:07:47,380 --> 00:07:49,714
And you can kiss your
Florida sunshine goodbye.
258
00:07:49,716 --> 00:07:50,681
I'll tell them
it was all you.
259
00:07:50,683 --> 00:07:51,949
- It's your fault.
- Oh, really?
260
00:07:51,951 --> 00:07:52,750
I wasn't even involved.
261
00:07:52,752 --> 00:07:54,018
- Oh, you weren't?
- No.
262
00:07:54,020 --> 00:07:57,054
You're an accessory,
okay?
263
00:07:57,056 --> 00:07:58,489
How's that little drink?
264
00:07:58,491 --> 00:08:00,624
And your little
first-class seat?
265
00:08:00,626 --> 00:08:01,992
Cozy?
266
00:08:03,763 --> 00:08:05,262
You're a monster.
267
00:08:06,933 --> 00:08:08,299
You married me.
268
00:08:11,738 --> 00:08:13,738
Your parents
up in first class, too?
269
00:08:13,740 --> 00:08:15,940
Yeah,
my dad got bumped up.
270
00:08:15,942 --> 00:08:18,776
Meanwhile, we're stuck
back here like animals.
271
00:08:18,778 --> 00:08:21,212
You're funny.
272
00:08:21,214 --> 00:08:24,215
Hey, do I know you?
Wait a second.
273
00:08:24,217 --> 00:08:27,151
- You go to Berner Junior
High, right? - Yeah.
274
00:08:27,153 --> 00:08:29,220
You're the quarterback
for the football team!
275
00:08:29,222 --> 00:08:31,255
Everybody talks
about you.
276
00:08:31,257 --> 00:08:32,957
It is you, right?
277
00:08:34,127 --> 00:08:35,626
Yes.
278
00:08:37,196 --> 00:08:39,397
You seem nervous.
279
00:08:39,399 --> 00:08:41,866
I wanted to take a van
to Florida.
280
00:08:41,868 --> 00:08:43,134
I was overruled.
281
00:08:43,136 --> 00:08:44,769
Oh, don't worry.
282
00:08:44,771 --> 00:08:48,305
Flying is statistically the
safest form of travel.
283
00:08:48,307 --> 00:08:51,342
Absolutely. We've been involved
in several incidents ourselves,
284
00:08:51,344 --> 00:08:54,145
- and we came out just fine.
- Incidents?
285
00:08:54,147 --> 00:08:56,714
Yeah, one time, our plane
caught fire on the runway.
286
00:08:56,716 --> 00:08:57,815
Oh, mm-hmm.
287
00:08:57,817 --> 00:08:59,350
All this stuff was
leaking out of the back,
288
00:08:59,352 --> 00:09:00,818
and then that
caught fire.
289
00:09:00,820 --> 00:09:05,890
The worst was when we dropped
3,000 feet in 10 seconds.
290
00:09:05,892 --> 00:09:07,958
Herman was on
the ceiling.
291
00:09:07,960 --> 00:09:09,393
Aah!
[ Laughs ]
292
00:09:09,395 --> 00:09:10,961
Oh! Stop! [ Laughs ]
293
00:09:10,963 --> 00:09:12,730
This is not helping me.
294
00:09:12,732 --> 00:09:16,000
♪
295
00:09:18,671 --> 00:09:20,704
- Nice dog.
- Mnh-mnh.
296
00:09:20,706 --> 00:09:22,807
Maxine is
an emotional support dog.
297
00:09:22,809 --> 00:09:23,974
As long
as she has a vest on,
298
00:09:23,976 --> 00:09:25,342
she's legally allowed
on the plane.
299
00:09:25,344 --> 00:09:26,911
It's cool.
I like dogs.
300
00:09:26,913 --> 00:09:28,512
Oh, you do?
301
00:09:28,514 --> 00:09:30,347
Well, she needs
to stretch her legs.
302
00:09:30,349 --> 00:09:31,749
You want to walk her
for me?
303
00:09:31,751 --> 00:09:33,617
I'll give you $5.
304
00:09:33,619 --> 00:09:34,819
Done.
305
00:09:39,691 --> 00:09:41,659
That's right.
306
00:09:41,661 --> 00:09:45,296
Drift off to la-la-land.
307
00:09:45,298 --> 00:09:46,630
Oh, it is "go" time.
308
00:09:46,632 --> 00:09:48,332
Hey, Dad.
Hey. What are you -- Shh!
309
00:09:48,334 --> 00:09:49,800
Vanessa's sleeping.
What are you doing?
310
00:09:49,802 --> 00:09:50,901
What's up?
311
00:09:50,903 --> 00:09:53,704
Well, I'm sitting next
to this really nice girl.
312
00:09:53,706 --> 00:09:55,372
I'm nervous.
313
00:09:55,374 --> 00:09:56,507
I might have lied to her.
314
00:09:56,509 --> 00:09:57,875
Okay, well, no, you can't
do that, Jack, okay?
315
00:09:57,877 --> 00:09:59,076
You got to go back there
and tell her the truth.
316
00:09:59,078 --> 00:10:00,277
That's the only way
it works.
317
00:10:00,279 --> 00:10:02,112
- Dr. Gable.
- Yes?
318
00:10:02,114 --> 00:10:04,181
Would you like the steak
or the chicken?
319
00:10:04,183 --> 00:10:05,416
Surprise me.
320
00:10:05,418 --> 00:10:06,417
Hey, buddy,
you can't be here.
321
00:10:06,419 --> 00:10:08,586
This is first class.
Get out of here.
322
00:10:15,695 --> 00:10:18,128
- Hi. - I don't know if you heard
anything over there or not.
323
00:10:18,130 --> 00:10:19,630
- I just wanted to -- Wait.
- Hey, I like your shirt.
324
00:10:19,632 --> 00:10:21,999
- Oh. Tha--
- Wait, are you a Billy Joel fan?
325
00:10:22,001 --> 00:10:23,033
I am.
326
00:10:23,035 --> 00:10:24,401
You know, I was
at the concert
327
00:10:24,403 --> 00:10:26,103
where he closed
Shea Stadium.
328
00:10:26,105 --> 00:10:27,371
- Are you kidding me?!
- No.
329
00:10:27,373 --> 00:10:28,639
That's aw-- Wait.
330
00:10:28,641 --> 00:10:30,341
Please tell me you're
not a Mets fan, too.
331
00:10:30,343 --> 00:10:31,909
I mean, die-hard.
332
00:10:31,911 --> 00:10:33,310
Would you --
Would you ever, like,
333
00:10:33,312 --> 00:10:36,447
want to go to a game
or something?
334
00:10:36,449 --> 00:10:37,915
I'd love to.
335
00:10:37,917 --> 00:10:39,383
That --
That's incredible.
336
00:10:39,385 --> 00:10:41,085
So you were there?
You are -- I mean --
337
00:10:41,087 --> 00:10:43,020
- Yeah.
- [ Chuckling] That's awesome!
338
00:10:43,022 --> 00:10:44,855
And I was like...
339
00:10:49,996 --> 00:10:51,996
Yeah, is the foo--
The food ready?
340
00:10:51,998 --> 00:10:54,732
So sorry to wake you,
Mrs. Gable.
341
00:10:54,734 --> 00:10:57,334
There's just a situation
with your husband
342
00:10:57,336 --> 00:10:59,436
I think
you should be aware of.
343
00:11:02,508 --> 00:11:04,308
[ Both laughing ]
344
00:11:05,845 --> 00:11:07,645
Uh...
345
00:11:07,647 --> 00:11:08,946
Listen, um...
346
00:11:10,683 --> 00:11:12,182
You're gonna hate me in about
a minute, but trust me,
347
00:11:12,184 --> 00:11:13,183
it's not
what it looks like, okay?
348
00:11:13,185 --> 00:11:14,218
- What?
- Wait, what?
349
00:11:14,220 --> 00:11:15,185
- There's no time.
- What is it?
350
00:11:15,187 --> 00:11:16,320
Just give me
your phone number.
351
00:11:16,322 --> 00:11:17,288
I-I'll call you sometime.
I'll call you.
352
00:11:17,290 --> 00:11:18,856
I don't know.
Hey. Hey!
353
00:11:18,858 --> 00:11:20,491
Hi, honey.
354
00:11:20,493 --> 00:11:21,525
Who is this?
355
00:11:21,527 --> 00:11:22,526
Uh, Lisa.
356
00:11:22,528 --> 00:11:24,094
Lisa.
Hello, nice to meet you.
357
00:11:24,096 --> 00:11:25,029
I'm his wife.
358
00:11:25,031 --> 00:11:25,896
What? Wife?!
359
00:11:25,898 --> 00:11:27,531
- Wife.
- Wife!
360
00:11:29,669 --> 00:11:31,268
I can't believe this.
361
00:11:31,270 --> 00:11:33,637
We're going to Disney
on Saturday, too.
362
00:11:33,639 --> 00:11:34,772
Maybe we can meet up.
363
00:11:34,774 --> 00:11:36,006
That'd be great.
364
00:11:36,008 --> 00:11:37,775
I was thinking about hitting
the weight room a little bit,
365
00:11:37,777 --> 00:11:39,843
but I think I can take
one day off.
366
00:11:39,845 --> 00:11:40,778
Cool.
367
00:11:40,780 --> 00:11:42,580
My dad loves football.
368
00:11:42,582 --> 00:11:45,749
He's gonna want to hear
all about it.
369
00:11:45,751 --> 00:11:47,217
Yeah, about that.
370
00:11:47,219 --> 00:11:49,219
I got to tell you
something.
371
00:11:49,221 --> 00:11:50,988
I'm not really
the quarterback.
372
00:11:50,990 --> 00:11:53,924
- I'm not even on the team.
- Oh.
373
00:11:53,926 --> 00:11:56,560
Yeah, I just felt like I
should tell you the truth
374
00:11:56,562 --> 00:11:59,096
'cause lying
is never okay.
375
00:11:59,098 --> 00:12:01,665
Yeah, I appreciate you
being honest.
376
00:12:01,667 --> 00:12:03,334
That's great.
377
00:12:10,509 --> 00:12:12,009
What just happened?
378
00:12:12,778 --> 00:12:14,912
Look,
I know you're mad at me,
379
00:12:14,914 --> 00:12:17,147
but she wasn't right
for you, anyway.
380
00:12:17,149 --> 00:12:18,048
Okay.
381
00:12:18,050 --> 00:12:19,216
She loved Billy Joel.
382
00:12:19,218 --> 00:12:21,051
We all love him.
He's the Piano Man.
383
00:12:21,053 --> 00:12:23,387
[ Sighs ]
384
00:12:23,389 --> 00:12:24,822
I just don't understand why
I can't go back there,
385
00:12:24,824 --> 00:12:26,123
talk to her, and make
it right. That's all.
386
00:12:26,125 --> 00:12:28,359
Because the flight
isn't over yet.
387
00:12:28,361 --> 00:12:29,994
Okay.
That is why.
388
00:12:29,996 --> 00:12:32,930
Not going to tell you
again.
389
00:12:32,932 --> 00:12:34,398
Mm-kay.
390
00:12:37,169 --> 00:12:38,101
I hate you.
391
00:12:38,103 --> 00:12:39,870
[ Loudly ]
I can read your lips.
392
00:12:39,872 --> 00:12:42,105
[ Whispers ]
I hate you.
393
00:12:42,789 --> 00:12:45,224
And friends of ours were on that
flight that crash-landed...
394
00:12:45,226 --> 00:12:46,558
- Oh.
- ...in the Hudson River,
395
00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:47,626
you know, with Sully.
396
00:12:47,628 --> 00:12:48,961
Landed on the Hudson.
397
00:12:48,963 --> 00:12:51,263
That's why they call it
a water landing.
398
00:12:51,265 --> 00:12:52,331
It was a crash.
399
00:12:52,333 --> 00:12:53,832
- Oh!
- Birds flew in the engine.
400
00:12:53,834 --> 00:12:55,133
Caught fire. Crashed.
401
00:12:55,135 --> 00:12:56,034
Uh...
402
00:12:56,036 --> 00:12:57,536
Please stop talking.
403
00:13:01,208 --> 00:13:04,810
Sweetheart,
by the way, the...
404
00:13:04,812 --> 00:13:05,944
It's a little awkward
to say
405
00:13:05,946 --> 00:13:07,612
with someone sitting
in between us,
406
00:13:07,614 --> 00:13:10,282
but the new underpants
you got me
407
00:13:10,284 --> 00:13:11,883
are a little
constricting.
408
00:13:11,885 --> 00:13:13,318
Oh.
I'm sorry.
409
00:13:13,320 --> 00:13:14,886
I was trying out
a new brand.
410
00:13:14,888 --> 00:13:16,154
I appreciate that.
411
00:13:16,156 --> 00:13:20,192
It's just that the legs are
like, uh, two tourniquets.
412
00:13:20,194 --> 00:13:21,526
Okay. So, hold up.
413
00:13:21,528 --> 00:13:23,795
You went out and bought
him new underwear,
414
00:13:23,797 --> 00:13:26,231
and now he's complaining
about it?
415
00:13:26,233 --> 00:13:27,866
I wasn't complaining.
416
00:13:27,868 --> 00:13:30,035
Sounds like complaining
to me.
417
00:13:30,037 --> 00:13:33,271
If my wife bought me
something, I'd be grateful.
418
00:13:33,273 --> 00:13:35,273
But I'll shut up.
419
00:13:35,275 --> 00:13:37,042
No, you know what,
he's right.
420
00:13:37,044 --> 00:13:38,610
I mean, why don't you
just go buy your own
421
00:13:38,612 --> 00:13:40,412
instead of putting it
on my to-do list?
422
00:13:40,414 --> 00:13:42,214
And by the way,
after you turn 5,
423
00:13:42,216 --> 00:13:45,617
they're not called
"underpants" anymore.
424
00:13:45,619 --> 00:13:48,086
I think this goes deeper
than underpants.
425
00:13:49,923 --> 00:13:53,592
I didn't ask you to
buy me under... wear.
426
00:13:53,594 --> 00:13:54,693
No, no, no.
I get it.
427
00:13:54,695 --> 00:13:55,727
Bought the wrong
underwear,
428
00:13:55,729 --> 00:13:57,863
and I bought
the wrong sunscreen.
429
00:13:57,865 --> 00:13:59,831
It sounds like you can't
do anything right.
430
00:13:59,833 --> 00:14:01,032
[ Scoffs ]
431
00:14:01,034 --> 00:14:03,602
You know, I really
resent that, Chale.
432
00:14:03,604 --> 00:14:04,970
I do my best.
433
00:14:04,972 --> 00:14:06,705
I didn't say
that you didn't.
434
00:14:06,707 --> 00:14:08,507
It was the man in the
middle that said it!
435
00:14:10,277 --> 00:14:12,210
Vanessa: No, really, I mean,
I've always loved planes.
436
00:14:12,212 --> 00:14:15,680
And I find air travel
to be magic.
437
00:14:15,682 --> 00:14:17,149
You know, like,
how does it, like, work?
438
00:14:17,151 --> 00:14:18,950
[ Chuckles ]
439
00:14:21,021 --> 00:14:24,389
So... if, like,
the pilot dies,
440
00:14:24,391 --> 00:14:27,259
you're, like,
"in charge"?
441
00:14:28,529 --> 00:14:30,562
That's sexy.
442
00:14:30,564 --> 00:14:32,531
You want to play my wife?
443
00:14:32,533 --> 00:14:34,666
Then you're my wife.
444
00:14:34,668 --> 00:14:37,636
Hon, uh, the kids were asking
for you back in our row.
445
00:14:37,638 --> 00:14:39,504
We have kids,
by the way.
446
00:14:39,506 --> 00:14:41,139
You want to play this game?
'Cause I'll play this game.
447
00:14:41,141 --> 00:14:42,774
[ Scoffs ]
Are you proud of yourself?
448
00:14:42,776 --> 00:14:44,476
Really. Seriously. You
feel like a big man now?
449
00:14:44,478 --> 00:14:45,911
What?
Eye for an eye.
450
00:14:45,913 --> 00:14:48,046
[ Scoffs ]
What are we doing?
451
00:14:48,048 --> 00:14:49,481
We're -- We're in first
class for an hour.
452
00:14:49,483 --> 00:14:50,949
We're already
at each other's throats.
453
00:14:50,951 --> 00:14:53,151
Look, I'm not the one who
lied to get us up here, okay?
454
00:14:53,153 --> 00:14:54,653
Okay, yes.
I lied.
455
00:14:54,655 --> 00:14:56,388
I said we're married
because I thought
456
00:14:56,390 --> 00:14:58,423
being in first class
would be a nice thing.
457
00:14:58,425 --> 00:14:59,524
So sorry.
458
00:14:59,526 --> 00:15:00,859
[ Sighs ]
459
00:15:00,861 --> 00:15:02,828
All right, let's just enjoy
the rest of the flight, okay?
460
00:15:02,830 --> 00:15:04,896
Okay. I'll get the
family down to Florida,
461
00:15:04,898 --> 00:15:06,298
- and everything will be great.
- Okay.
462
00:15:06,300 --> 00:15:08,066
We'll be in the sunshine,
and -- and, you know what,
463
00:15:08,068 --> 00:15:10,936
it'll practically
be perfect again.
464
00:15:10,938 --> 00:15:12,037
- There you go.
- Yeah.
465
00:15:12,039 --> 00:15:14,573
In the meantime,
let's enjoy first class.
466
00:15:14,575 --> 00:15:15,941
It's not so bad, is it?
467
00:15:15,943 --> 00:15:17,742
Actually [Chuckling]
I could get used to this.
468
00:15:17,744 --> 00:15:19,444
Right?
Yes!
469
00:15:21,715 --> 00:15:23,715
You two make me sick.
470
00:15:26,687 --> 00:15:28,486
So, it was all a lie?
471
00:15:28,488 --> 00:15:30,255
Uh, not all of it.
472
00:15:30,257 --> 00:15:31,756
- Are you married?
- No.
473
00:15:31,758 --> 00:15:32,991
Are you really
a neurosurgeon?
474
00:15:32,993 --> 00:15:35,794
Did you really have
to ask him that?
475
00:15:35,796 --> 00:15:37,562
We're --
We're really sorry, okay?
476
00:15:37,564 --> 00:15:39,798
- Yes, it --
- Uh, look, it was my fault.
477
00:15:39,800 --> 00:15:42,567
His daughter and his
son-in-law are on the plane,
478
00:15:42,569 --> 00:15:44,069
and they're actually
the newlyweds.
479
00:15:44,071 --> 00:15:45,704
It was just a
misunderstanding at the gate
480
00:15:45,706 --> 00:15:47,038
I took advantage of.
481
00:15:47,040 --> 00:15:48,039
I'm really sorry.
482
00:15:48,041 --> 00:15:49,207
If you want to send her
back to coach,
483
00:15:49,209 --> 00:15:50,742
I mean,
I totally understand.
484
00:15:50,744 --> 00:15:51,743
Hey, I think actually,
at this point,
485
00:15:51,745 --> 00:15:54,312
you probably have to, right?
486
00:15:54,314 --> 00:15:55,413
You're both going.
487
00:15:55,415 --> 00:15:57,249
Yep. Okay. Here we go.
488
00:16:03,457 --> 00:16:04,356
- Uh, leave 'em.
- Yeah.
489
00:16:04,358 --> 00:16:06,324
Yeah.
Okay. Let's go.
490
00:16:11,498 --> 00:16:13,832
♪
491
00:16:13,834 --> 00:16:16,935
I feel like you two
are ganging up on me.
492
00:16:16,937 --> 00:16:18,436
Hey, don't drag me
into this.
493
00:16:18,438 --> 00:16:20,071
I just said,
"Stop being judgy."
494
00:16:20,073 --> 00:16:22,107
That's all I said.
495
00:16:22,109 --> 00:16:24,342
Yeah, that's all
he said, Chale.
496
00:16:24,344 --> 00:16:26,845
But in your defense, she
does sound like a handful.
497
00:16:28,582 --> 00:16:31,516
Kristie:
Passengers Kendra and Chale Witt,
498
00:16:31,518 --> 00:16:35,120
would you please
come up to first class?
499
00:16:35,122 --> 00:16:36,288
Ooh! Is that turkey?
500
00:16:36,290 --> 00:16:37,522
I'm gonna get me
one of those.
501
00:16:37,524 --> 00:16:39,624
Oh, she said
this was the last one.
502
00:16:39,626 --> 00:16:41,026
I'll give you $5.
503
00:16:43,664 --> 00:16:45,230
Okay, fine.
I'll give you $10.
504
00:16:45,232 --> 00:16:47,098
Thanks!
[ Scoffs ]
505
00:16:47,100 --> 00:16:49,935
Ooh, ooh, ooh!
506
00:16:49,937 --> 00:16:51,102
You know,
I got to say...
507
00:16:51,104 --> 00:16:52,370
- Thank you...
- this is more like it.
508
00:16:52,372 --> 00:16:54,272
[ Chuckles ]
I agree.
509
00:16:54,274 --> 00:16:57,575
Mm! Oh, and the best
part -- no middle seat.
510
00:16:57,577 --> 00:16:58,810
Yeah.
511
00:16:58,812 --> 00:17:01,146
It is horrible back here.
512
00:17:01,148 --> 00:17:02,447
These seats are so small.
513
00:17:02,449 --> 00:17:03,982
Okay, it is what it is.
514
00:17:03,984 --> 00:17:05,617
Just let it go, okay?
515
00:17:05,619 --> 00:17:06,718
I'm a first-class girl.
516
00:17:06,720 --> 00:17:07,719
I mean, I know that now.
517
00:17:07,721 --> 00:17:09,521
Well, toughen up.
518
00:17:09,523 --> 00:17:10,722
We got about an hour
left, all right,
519
00:17:10,724 --> 00:17:12,924
then it's Florida
with my family.
520
00:17:12,926 --> 00:17:14,893
And I am not letting anything
get in the way of that.
521
00:17:14,895 --> 00:17:17,829
Ladies and gentlemen, this
is your captain speaking.
522
00:17:17,831 --> 00:17:18,997
Don't you do it.
523
00:17:18,999 --> 00:17:21,299
We just got contacted
by Jacksonville.
524
00:17:21,301 --> 00:17:23,301
Looks like there's some
bad weather up ahead.
525
00:17:23,303 --> 00:17:25,870
[ Groaning ] No.
526
00:17:25,872 --> 00:17:28,473
They're asking that we set
her down a little early.
527
00:17:28,475 --> 00:17:30,275
Looks like our final
destination today
528
00:17:30,277 --> 00:17:31,276
is gonna be...
529
00:17:31,278 --> 00:17:33,478
Florida.
The Panhandle of Florida.
530
00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:34,813
...Nickelsville,
Louisiana.
531
00:17:34,815 --> 00:17:36,848
[ Grunts ]
532
00:17:36,850 --> 00:17:38,783
And the weather
there is...
533
00:17:38,785 --> 00:17:40,852
Unseasonably warm.
534
00:17:40,854 --> 00:17:43,021
...37 and cloudy.
535
00:17:43,023 --> 00:17:44,889
Flight attendants,
prepare for landing.
536
00:17:44,891 --> 00:17:46,958
Buckle up. It's gonna be
bumpy on the approach.
537
00:17:46,960 --> 00:17:49,260
[ Mutters indistinctly ]
538
00:17:49,262 --> 00:17:50,495
This is it!
539
00:17:50,497 --> 00:17:51,696
We're going down!
540
00:17:51,698 --> 00:17:54,766
Rootger,
you got to shut up!
541
00:17:54,768 --> 00:17:58,503
♪
542
00:17:58,505 --> 00:18:00,839
Great. Weatherman says
the storm's gonna last
543
00:18:00,841 --> 00:18:02,307
for the next two days.
544
00:18:02,309 --> 00:18:03,475
That's perfect.
545
00:18:03,477 --> 00:18:05,810
I can save my money
by not going anywhere.
546
00:18:05,812 --> 00:18:09,881
What kind of hotel
doesn't have a bar?
547
00:18:11,718 --> 00:18:14,786
Can we please focus
on what we do have
548
00:18:14,788 --> 00:18:16,354
instead of what we don't?
549
00:18:16,356 --> 00:18:18,490
I mean,
it's not that bad.
550
00:18:18,492 --> 00:18:21,159
Let's go to Florida
tonight!
551
00:18:21,161 --> 00:18:23,728
Uh, I don't know. I think
the road conditions alone
552
00:18:23,730 --> 00:18:25,563
are highly questionable,
and then you factor in
553
00:18:25,565 --> 00:18:27,032
the high winds
and the rain.
554
00:18:27,034 --> 00:18:29,434
Come on. You're not factoring
in the driver behind the wheel
555
00:18:29,436 --> 00:18:31,469
that will get us
to the Sunshine State.
556
00:18:31,471 --> 00:18:33,605
It's a little breezy.
We'll have fun.
557
00:18:33,607 --> 00:18:35,707
We'll sing songs in the
car on the way down,
558
00:18:35,709 --> 00:18:36,875
and we'll be there
by morning.
559
00:18:36,877 --> 00:18:39,010
Now, I'm getting in the
rental car right now.
560
00:18:39,012 --> 00:18:41,679
I expect you guys
to follow me.
561
00:18:41,681 --> 00:18:44,215
I will be there, and I
will be ready, okay?
562
00:18:44,217 --> 00:18:45,583
Now, I'm not waiting
that long.
563
00:18:45,585 --> 00:18:47,819
[ Rain pouring ]
564
00:18:50,123 --> 00:18:53,558
He does have a sort
of... inspiring optimism.
565
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:56,628
More like
a... blind stupidity.
566
00:18:59,266 --> 00:19:00,899
You know what?
Dad's right.
567
00:19:00,901 --> 00:19:02,467
Maybe we should just
grab our stuff,
568
00:19:02,469 --> 00:19:05,103
get in the car,
and just go.
569
00:19:05,105 --> 00:19:06,905
Yeah, it'll kind of
be like an adventure.
570
00:19:06,907 --> 00:19:08,139
- Yeah.
- Mm-hmm.
571
00:19:08,141 --> 00:19:10,241
I kind of feel bad
for the big guy.
572
00:19:10,243 --> 00:19:12,177
[ Wind gusting ]
573
00:19:12,179 --> 00:19:16,114
As long as the wheels are on
the floor, I'm good to go.
574
00:19:16,116 --> 00:19:18,883
[ Gusting continues ]
575
00:19:20,854 --> 00:19:22,787
Did you guys
see something?
576
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:33,095
Hi. Uh, we're -- we're traveling
back to New York in coach,
577
00:19:33,097 --> 00:19:36,131
and we just wanted you to be
aware of a special occasion.
578
00:19:36,133 --> 00:19:39,268
Um, we're celebrating
her new kidneys.
579
00:19:39,270 --> 00:19:40,936
Uh, one of which is mine.
580
00:19:40,938 --> 00:19:42,604
Yes.
[ Chuckles nervously ]
581
00:19:42,606 --> 00:19:44,139
- Yeah.
- Thanks again, honey.
582
00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:45,808
It's working really well.
583
00:19:45,810 --> 00:19:48,644
You know, just seeing
if you could work the...
584
00:19:48,646 --> 00:19:50,279
You want to do a little bit of
the, uh, you know, the, uh...
585
00:19:50,281 --> 00:19:51,880
[ Imitates keys clacking ]
Like that?
586
00:19:56,920 --> 00:19:57,920
Okay.
587
00:19:57,992 --> 00:20:01,192
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