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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,992 --> 00:00:03,627 Hey, Charles, want to grab a beer before you go home? 2 00:00:03,660 --> 00:00:05,230 - Ooh, a yeast feast. - Never mind. 3 00:00:05,262 --> 00:00:06,230 No, no, no, I want to go, it's just, 4 00:00:06,264 --> 00:00:08,432 there's a huge emergency I have to deal with first. 5 00:00:08,465 --> 00:00:09,766 Oh, no. Is everything okay? 6 00:00:09,800 --> 00:00:10,835 It's about my food truck. 7 00:00:10,868 --> 00:00:12,236 I have to get a parking spot. 8 00:00:12,269 --> 00:00:13,503 Oh. That doesn't sound as intense 9 00:00:13,537 --> 00:00:14,839 as you were making it out to be. 10 00:00:14,871 --> 00:00:17,242 - Move your ass, you old bitch! - What is happening? 11 00:00:17,274 --> 00:00:18,575 We have to get there by 7:00 12 00:00:18,609 --> 00:00:20,445 when they lift the parking restrictions. 13 00:00:20,478 --> 00:00:23,224 It's the best spot in Brooklyn, and everyone wants it. 14 00:00:23,249 --> 00:00:24,584 Get the hell out of the way! 15 00:00:27,153 --> 00:00:30,590 Charles, I highly doubt the entire food truck industry 16 00:00:30,622 --> 00:00:32,057 is racing to get into this one spot. 17 00:00:32,090 --> 00:00:33,592 It's not "Mad Max." 18 00:00:33,625 --> 00:00:34,860 We're neck and neck with rice pudding. 19 00:00:34,893 --> 00:00:36,629 You got Korean tacos on your six. 20 00:00:36,662 --> 00:00:38,864 Oh, my God, it's real. We're on the Fury Road. 21 00:00:39,765 --> 00:00:41,167 Witness me, blood bag! 22 00:00:41,199 --> 00:00:42,535 Hold on tight! 23 00:00:54,134 --> 00:00:56,304 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com 24 00:01:14,285 --> 00:01:16,643 That was the most stressful thing I've ever gone through, 25 00:01:16,668 --> 00:01:18,137 and I was wrongfully imprisoned last year. 26 00:01:18,170 --> 00:01:19,572 That was fun. 27 00:01:19,605 --> 00:01:22,007 Every aspect of owning a food truck is fun. 28 00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:23,676 It is fun, fun, fun. 29 00:01:23,717 --> 00:01:25,623 What the hell do you want, Troy? 30 00:01:25,648 --> 00:01:26,857 You stole my spot, you son of a bitch! 31 00:01:26,891 --> 00:01:28,160 Oh, go on, get out of here. 32 00:01:28,192 --> 00:01:29,995 - You're just jealous. - I'm not going anywhere! I made a signal, 33 00:01:30,028 --> 00:01:31,329 - and you made an illegal U-turn! - Give me a break. 34 00:01:31,361 --> 00:01:33,030 - I should call the cops! - Oh, are you gonna 35 00:01:33,064 --> 00:01:34,299 - call the cops? - Yeah, I'm gonna call the cops! 36 00:01:34,332 --> 00:01:35,967 - I am the cops! - Oh, you're a cop now? 37 00:01:35,999 --> 00:01:36,968 Why don't you go back to your garbage truck 38 00:01:37,001 --> 00:01:38,303 and cook some pudding? 39 00:01:38,335 --> 00:01:39,304 You're gonna regret this. 40 00:01:39,337 --> 00:01:41,505 Kill yourself, Troy! 41 00:01:41,538 --> 00:01:43,308 Jake, I have a confession to make. 42 00:01:43,341 --> 00:01:45,323 The food truck is kind of stressing me out. 43 00:01:47,412 --> 00:01:49,955 Bad news, Captain. A water main burst downtown. 44 00:01:50,034 --> 00:01:51,970 - There's been several injuries. - Oh, that's unfortunate. 45 00:01:52,004 --> 00:01:53,873 And the victims are in our blah-blah-blah, 46 00:01:53,906 --> 00:01:55,240 but tell him the real tragedy, Terry. 47 00:01:55,273 --> 00:01:56,374 Olivia Crawford... 48 00:01:56,408 --> 00:01:58,210 AKA your main commish competish. 49 00:01:58,242 --> 00:02:00,745 Tweeted a statement addressing the water main break, 50 00:02:00,778 --> 00:02:03,114 and she's been retweeted by the mayor. 51 00:02:03,147 --> 00:02:05,116 "Kudos to our brave officers"... 52 00:02:05,150 --> 00:02:07,085 - Hey, now. - Whoa! What is going on? 53 00:02:07,118 --> 00:02:08,754 It's in all caps. 54 00:02:08,786 --> 00:02:10,388 Anyway, I don't see how this is bad news. 55 00:02:10,422 --> 00:02:12,124 Because the commissioner race, 56 00:02:12,156 --> 00:02:13,291 like all of life, 57 00:02:13,325 --> 00:02:14,760 is a popularity contest, 58 00:02:14,792 --> 00:02:17,296 and Olivia is sitting at the hot senior table 59 00:02:17,328 --> 00:02:20,099 whilst you are eating lunch alone. 60 00:02:20,131 --> 00:02:23,201 If the mayor wants to make me the next NYPD commissioner, 61 00:02:23,234 --> 00:02:25,438 it'll be because of my record and my qualifications, 62 00:02:25,470 --> 00:02:27,439 not my social media presence. 63 00:02:27,472 --> 00:02:29,208 - This is a serious job. - I know. 64 00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:32,043 But like it or not, the decision is political, 65 00:02:32,077 --> 00:02:34,914 and social media is a part of politics now. 66 00:02:34,946 --> 00:02:36,915 - You need a Twitter account. - Not gonna happen. 67 00:02:36,948 --> 00:02:38,784 The whole thing is inane. 68 00:02:38,816 --> 00:02:41,320 Besides, 140 characters is far more 69 00:02:41,352 --> 00:02:42,821 than anyone needs to make a point. 70 00:02:42,855 --> 00:02:45,323 They actually upped it to 280. 71 00:02:45,357 --> 00:02:46,826 Oh, good God. 72 00:02:46,858 --> 00:02:48,194 I'm so miserable, Jake. 73 00:02:48,226 --> 00:02:50,195 The truck is hemorrhaging money. I'm going bankrupt. 74 00:02:50,228 --> 00:02:51,996 - I never see my family. - All right, look. 75 00:02:52,029 --> 00:02:54,399 You just have to find a way to reduce expenses. 76 00:02:54,433 --> 00:02:56,268 I've started saving $200 a month 77 00:02:56,301 --> 00:02:57,803 just by buying "John Wick" 78 00:02:57,835 --> 00:02:59,137 instead of renting it every two nights. 79 00:02:59,171 --> 00:03:00,106 I have cut costs. 80 00:03:00,138 --> 00:03:02,507 I fired my only employee, Ted, which was awful. 81 00:03:02,541 --> 00:03:04,076 Okay, look, I hate to ask this, 82 00:03:04,108 --> 00:03:05,945 but have you considered shutting the truck down? 83 00:03:05,977 --> 00:03:07,846 You're always bragging about how much Boyles love to give up. 84 00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:09,482 I can't. I'm in so much debt. 85 00:03:09,514 --> 00:03:11,149 I took out a loan for the truck. 86 00:03:11,183 --> 00:03:12,852 I got Amy to invest. 87 00:03:12,885 --> 00:03:15,087 No, the only way out of this hole is to keep digging. 88 00:03:15,119 --> 00:03:17,088 That's not how holes work... title of your sex tape... 89 00:03:17,121 --> 00:03:18,423 Charles, look, you're gonna 90 00:03:18,457 --> 00:03:20,126 find your way out of this, I swear. 91 00:03:20,159 --> 00:03:21,861 - It's all gonna work out. - You're right. 92 00:03:21,893 --> 00:03:24,063 You know, if I just work hard and stay positive, 93 00:03:24,095 --> 00:03:25,463 I'm sure it'll be a huge success 94 00:03:25,496 --> 00:03:26,766 and everything will be okay. 95 00:03:26,798 --> 00:03:27,932 There you go. 96 00:03:29,802 --> 00:03:31,470 Hello? Oh. 97 00:03:31,502 --> 00:03:33,905 Okay. No, thank you. 98 00:03:33,939 --> 00:03:36,007 So my truck burned down. 99 00:03:36,041 --> 00:03:37,109 Hey. 100 00:03:37,142 --> 00:03:38,944 Someone robbed a bodega on 4th Street. 101 00:03:38,976 --> 00:03:40,278 It's the fifth one this week. 102 00:03:40,311 --> 00:03:42,248 It's so sad that someone's targeting bodegas. 103 00:03:42,280 --> 00:03:44,016 They're part of the fabric of New York. 104 00:03:44,048 --> 00:03:45,817 - You shop at them a lot? - No. They overcharge 105 00:03:45,851 --> 00:03:46,952 for everything, and they sell rat poison 106 00:03:46,984 --> 00:03:48,254 right next to the bananas. 107 00:03:48,286 --> 00:03:50,022 Yeah, they're gross. I hope they never change. 108 00:03:50,054 --> 00:03:51,256 Anyway, Holt wants us to interview 109 00:03:51,290 --> 00:03:52,924 some of the bodega owners and figure out 110 00:03:52,958 --> 00:03:54,493 where to assign additional uniformed officers. 111 00:03:54,525 --> 00:03:56,028 I put a map up on the server... 112 00:03:56,060 --> 00:03:57,962 No! Just email it to me. 113 00:03:57,995 --> 00:03:59,798 I hate servers. Bye! 114 00:03:59,832 --> 00:04:01,132 Wait. Why'd you close your laptop so fast? 115 00:04:01,166 --> 00:04:02,935 - What are you hiding? - Nurthing. 116 00:04:02,968 --> 00:04:04,203 - You're hiding something. - What? 117 00:04:04,236 --> 00:04:06,471 - Just 'cause I said "nurthing"? - Yes. 118 00:04:06,505 --> 00:04:08,808 No! 119 00:04:08,840 --> 00:04:10,909 Aww, you're looking at wedding dresses? 120 00:04:10,942 --> 00:04:12,877 - That one's dope. - That's not what I was doing. 121 00:04:12,910 --> 00:04:14,412 My computer must've gone to this site on its own. 122 00:04:14,446 --> 00:04:16,482 - How is that possible? - It's broken, Y2K. 123 00:04:16,514 --> 00:04:17,817 I'll fix it. 124 00:04:18,983 --> 00:04:20,351 There, it's fixed. 125 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:22,021 - You're weird. - I know. 126 00:04:22,053 --> 00:04:23,522 Oh, God. My truck. 127 00:04:23,555 --> 00:04:25,090 This truck was my baby! 128 00:04:25,123 --> 00:04:26,591 All right, look, Charles, I know you're upset, 129 00:04:26,625 --> 00:04:28,027 but maybe there's a silver lining here. 130 00:04:28,060 --> 00:04:30,328 - I mean, you had insurance, right? - Yeah. I already called them. 131 00:04:30,361 --> 00:04:31,815 So maybe you'll get some money for this, 132 00:04:31,846 --> 00:04:33,899 and you can pay off your debts, starting with Amy. 133 00:04:33,931 --> 00:04:35,500 I'm sorry, that was selfish. Forget I said it. 134 00:04:35,534 --> 00:04:37,336 You can pay off your debts, starting with Amy. 135 00:04:37,368 --> 00:04:38,503 Whoops, I did it again. 136 00:04:38,536 --> 00:04:40,171 You're right. This is my way out. 137 00:04:40,204 --> 00:04:41,173 It's a miracle. 138 00:04:41,205 --> 00:04:42,307 Oh, my God! 139 00:04:42,341 --> 00:04:43,976 Jake? Boyle? 140 00:04:44,009 --> 00:04:45,511 Adrian. What are you doing here? 141 00:04:45,543 --> 00:04:46,611 I'm an insurance investigator now. 142 00:04:46,644 --> 00:04:48,079 I thought you were in Alaska. 143 00:04:48,113 --> 00:04:50,115 Oh, yeah, I was, after Rosa and I broke up, 144 00:04:50,147 --> 00:04:51,316 but then I accidentally killed 145 00:04:51,349 --> 00:04:53,885 a "protected buffalo"... self-defense. 146 00:04:53,918 --> 00:04:56,555 Next thing I know, Fish and Game are all over my ass. 147 00:04:56,587 --> 00:04:58,189 I ended up in a fight with a bear, 148 00:04:58,223 --> 00:05:00,292 and I had to think to myself, why am I even here? 149 00:05:00,325 --> 00:05:02,127 Wait a minute. You fought a bear? 150 00:05:02,159 --> 00:05:03,462 Big time. The trick on that: 151 00:05:03,495 --> 00:05:05,331 head-butt him in the penis, push him over a cliff. 152 00:05:05,363 --> 00:05:06,931 Ah, I bet that works with a lot of animals. 153 00:05:06,964 --> 00:05:08,166 Only the male ones. 154 00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:09,534 - Learned that the hard way. - Hmm. 155 00:05:09,567 --> 00:05:11,002 Anyway, you know that if you guys want 156 00:05:11,036 --> 00:05:12,637 to get in touch with me, there's easier ways 157 00:05:12,671 --> 00:05:14,305 than burning down your truck, right? 158 00:05:14,339 --> 00:05:16,208 What? Burning down my truck? 159 00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:18,510 Yeah, it's obviously arson, you did it, 160 00:05:18,543 --> 00:05:19,644 you're not gonna get a dime 161 00:05:19,678 --> 00:05:21,213 and are probably gonna go to jail. 162 00:05:21,245 --> 00:05:23,790 So... what's going on with you guys? 163 00:05:23,815 --> 00:05:26,165 Give me that juicy Nine-Nine goss, am I right? 164 00:05:31,416 --> 00:05:32,741 This is insane. 165 00:05:32,766 --> 00:05:34,984 I mean, Charles loved this truck. It's his baby. 166 00:05:35,009 --> 00:05:36,208 There's no way he'd burn it down. 167 00:05:36,262 --> 00:05:37,682 The world is a messed up place, Jake. 168 00:05:37,714 --> 00:05:38,715 People kill their babies. 169 00:05:38,748 --> 00:05:39,950 Babies kill their parents. 170 00:05:39,983 --> 00:05:41,652 It's the circle of life. 171 00:05:41,685 --> 00:05:44,055 - That was clearly a triangle. - Okay, fine, busted. 172 00:05:44,087 --> 00:05:45,822 I just had the stove's gas line cleaned. 173 00:05:45,856 --> 00:05:47,524 Maybe it was put back in wrong or something. 174 00:05:47,558 --> 00:05:49,726 Look, I've caught enough arsonists in my day 175 00:05:49,760 --> 00:05:51,027 to know that the owner always does it. 176 00:05:51,060 --> 00:05:52,674 Chuck, how's the truck been doing? 177 00:05:52,699 --> 00:05:53,890 - Pretty terrible. - Hmm? 178 00:05:53,930 --> 00:05:55,599 I was just saying, it's a miracle it burned down. 179 00:05:55,632 --> 00:05:57,253 Okay, I know Charles sounds hella guilty right now, 180 00:05:57,278 --> 00:05:58,435 but you know he didn't do it. 181 00:05:58,469 --> 00:05:59,496 Charles, this isn't looking good for you. 182 00:05:59,521 --> 00:06:01,215 Anybody else that might have done this? Any enemies? 183 00:06:01,251 --> 00:06:02,453 Well, my dad's best friend and I 184 00:06:02,485 --> 00:06:03,924 have a pretty intense rivalry, 185 00:06:03,949 --> 00:06:05,523 but I don't think my aunt would do anything illegal. 186 00:06:05,556 --> 00:06:06,758 Oh, my God. 187 00:06:06,790 --> 00:06:08,692 Wait. The rice pudding truck guy! 188 00:06:08,725 --> 00:06:10,727 Oh, my God. That bastard Troy. 189 00:06:10,761 --> 00:06:13,206 We just got into a fight about this very parking spot. 190 00:06:13,231 --> 00:06:15,198 - He said I'd regret it. - Yeah, and that's what happened. 191 00:06:15,223 --> 00:06:16,234 You're regretting it! 192 00:06:16,266 --> 00:06:17,839 Come on, you know we didn't commit arson. 193 00:06:17,864 --> 00:06:19,636 - Adrian, this is us. - Not the TV show. 194 00:06:19,661 --> 00:06:20,907 - We are your friends. - Not the movie. 195 00:06:20,940 --> 00:06:22,008 - You got to have faith. - Not the song. 196 00:06:22,041 --> 00:06:23,176 Are you doing this on purpose? 197 00:06:23,208 --> 00:06:24,198 - The third one, yes. - Okay. 198 00:06:24,223 --> 00:06:26,346 I'll admit, arson does seem out of character for you. 199 00:06:26,371 --> 00:06:27,869 Okay, look me in the eyes. 200 00:06:27,964 --> 00:06:31,368 Look me in the eyes like the bear did. 201 00:06:38,576 --> 00:06:39,911 Okay. 202 00:06:39,944 --> 00:06:41,879 I believe you, and together, 203 00:06:41,911 --> 00:06:43,885 we're gonna catch the SOB that did this. 204 00:06:45,850 --> 00:06:47,652 I'm so glad he didn't head-butt me in the penis. 205 00:06:47,685 --> 00:06:49,299 That's all I was thinking about. 206 00:06:49,586 --> 00:06:50,822 Cheddar! 207 00:06:50,855 --> 00:06:52,423 - That's a really good job. - Stay, stay. 208 00:06:52,456 --> 00:06:54,626 What's going on here? Why is Cheddar here? 209 00:06:54,658 --> 00:06:55,759 And why is he in swim trunks? 210 00:06:55,793 --> 00:06:57,295 Because the little sailor outfit 211 00:06:57,327 --> 00:06:58,829 - wouldn't fit his tush. - Excuse me? 212 00:06:58,863 --> 00:07:00,497 We're setting you up a Twitter account, 213 00:07:00,531 --> 00:07:01,699 and the fastest way to get followers 214 00:07:01,731 --> 00:07:02,933 is cute animal pics. 215 00:07:02,966 --> 00:07:04,534 I follow an account that's just 216 00:07:04,567 --> 00:07:07,014 this one real grouchy chinchilla. 217 00:07:07,039 --> 00:07:08,575 He hates waking up so much! 218 00:07:08,607 --> 00:07:10,710 He really does. He's like "Ooh!" 219 00:07:10,744 --> 00:07:12,011 This is ridiculous. 220 00:07:12,044 --> 00:07:13,713 This has nothing to do with police work. 221 00:07:13,746 --> 00:07:15,081 Exactly. It's about being noticed, 222 00:07:15,114 --> 00:07:16,984 and right now, no one is noticing you. 223 00:07:17,016 --> 00:07:18,684 I didn't even realize we were talking 224 00:07:18,717 --> 00:07:20,052 to a third party, presently. 225 00:07:20,085 --> 00:07:22,054 Fine. If you really think it's necessary, 226 00:07:22,088 --> 00:07:24,491 I will establish a social media presence. 227 00:07:24,523 --> 00:07:25,858 But I'll be setting up my own accounts, 228 00:07:25,891 --> 00:07:27,126 and I assure you, 229 00:07:27,160 --> 00:07:29,996 I won't be resorting to foolish gimmicks involving my dog. 230 00:07:30,030 --> 00:07:31,864 Uh, you might want to rethink that stance, 231 00:07:31,898 --> 00:07:34,133 because how cute would Cheddar look in this hat? 232 00:07:34,167 --> 00:07:36,102 Please. When it comes to clothes, 233 00:07:36,136 --> 00:07:38,638 Cheddar wears little booties in the snow, 234 00:07:38,672 --> 00:07:41,142 or Cheddar wears nothing. 235 00:07:41,874 --> 00:07:44,110 Troy's not home, but I say we wait. 236 00:07:44,143 --> 00:07:46,946 I have some hard questions for that rice pudding bastard. 237 00:07:46,979 --> 00:07:49,482 So, Adrian, how's life as an insurance investigator? 238 00:07:49,515 --> 00:07:50,917 It's amazing. At Gray Star Mutual, 239 00:07:50,951 --> 00:07:52,986 they let me do whatever I want, 240 00:07:53,018 --> 00:07:55,155 as long as I'm getting that job done, and you know I am. 241 00:07:55,188 --> 00:07:57,124 Last week, I waterboarded a dude. 242 00:07:57,157 --> 00:07:58,892 - Oh, that's not legal. - Doesn't matter. 243 00:07:58,924 --> 00:08:00,994 I'm not a cop. Anyway, what's up with you guys? 244 00:08:01,027 --> 00:08:02,463 Hey, Jake, who you porking? 245 00:08:02,496 --> 00:08:06,032 Uh, I guess Amy and I are still... 246 00:08:06,066 --> 00:08:08,035 - I don't want to say it. - Yep. 247 00:08:08,068 --> 00:08:10,037 - Porking. - Yeah, you are. Nice. 248 00:08:10,070 --> 00:08:11,505 Actually, we got engaged. 249 00:08:11,537 --> 00:08:13,006 What the hell? How come I didn't know? 250 00:08:13,039 --> 00:08:14,608 I thought we were supposed to be friends. 251 00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:16,910 Oh, wait a minute. Did this, like, just happen? 252 00:08:16,943 --> 00:08:18,912 Well, it was at Halloween. 253 00:08:18,945 --> 00:08:20,547 Wha... no, that's so long ago! 254 00:08:20,580 --> 00:08:22,649 Charles, are you just finding out about this too? 255 00:08:22,681 --> 00:08:23,917 No, I was there. 256 00:08:23,950 --> 00:08:25,551 You were there? Who else? 257 00:08:25,585 --> 00:08:26,787 Who else got to be a part of this? 258 00:08:26,820 --> 00:08:29,156 Nobody, you know, just... 259 00:08:29,188 --> 00:08:30,657 Holt and... 260 00:08:30,689 --> 00:08:32,059 - Terry and Rosa. - Okay. 261 00:08:32,092 --> 00:08:33,894 - And Hitchcock and Scully. - Seriously? 262 00:08:33,926 --> 00:08:35,095 And this creepy guy named Bill. 263 00:08:35,128 --> 00:08:36,997 Oh, come on! I'm the creepy guy 264 00:08:37,029 --> 00:08:38,931 that's supposed to be at stuff that you have happen. 265 00:08:38,965 --> 00:08:40,566 Look, you just left town, 266 00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,503 and we don't exactly have a text relationship... 267 00:08:42,536 --> 00:08:43,604 How dare you? 268 00:08:43,637 --> 00:08:45,705 May 10th, I texted you, 269 00:08:45,739 --> 00:08:47,273 I'm at the Gaga concert, you here, 270 00:08:47,306 --> 00:08:49,142 question mark, question mark, question mark. 271 00:08:49,175 --> 00:08:52,079 You texted back, No. Frowny face. 272 00:08:52,111 --> 00:08:53,980 Look, I've been really busy. I'm sorry, okay? 273 00:08:54,013 --> 00:08:55,782 I understand. 274 00:08:55,815 --> 00:08:58,085 You know, I just didn't hear about this one thing. 275 00:08:58,118 --> 00:08:59,953 I mean, I can't imagine there are any other 276 00:08:59,985 --> 00:09:02,855 major milestones that I've missed. 277 00:09:02,888 --> 00:09:04,157 - Are there? - I mean, Amy's a sergeant. 278 00:09:04,190 --> 00:09:05,225 - No. - And Holt's up 279 00:09:05,258 --> 00:09:06,926 - for commissioner. - Seriously? 280 00:09:06,960 --> 00:09:08,829 And Dr. Ronald Yee came to the precinct 281 00:09:08,861 --> 00:09:10,062 and taught a course on forensics. 282 00:09:10,095 --> 00:09:11,831 The Dr. Ronald Yee? 283 00:09:11,864 --> 00:09:13,066 - Mm-hmm. - Oh, my God! 284 00:09:13,099 --> 00:09:15,243 - Yee was in the building? - Yeah. 285 00:09:15,268 --> 00:09:16,728 Wow, didn't realize the Yee news was up there 286 00:09:16,753 --> 00:09:18,104 - with the other stuff. - Oh, come on, Jake. 287 00:09:18,138 --> 00:09:20,773 Yee only wrote the book on forensic facial reconstruction. 288 00:09:20,806 --> 00:09:22,075 He's a rock star! 289 00:09:22,108 --> 00:09:23,744 You guys could have texted me, but no, 290 00:09:23,777 --> 00:09:26,979 because I bet you haven't thought about me once 291 00:09:27,013 --> 00:09:28,581 since I dumped Rosa. 292 00:09:28,614 --> 00:09:30,082 - Did you dump her? - You know what? 293 00:09:30,115 --> 00:09:32,619 I need some air. I'm storming out. 294 00:09:32,652 --> 00:09:35,022 I'm storming out! 295 00:09:35,055 --> 00:09:36,924 So I can spare four uniformed officers 296 00:09:36,956 --> 00:09:39,258 to do hourly pass-bys of the bodegas south of 4th, 297 00:09:39,292 --> 00:09:41,994 and I'll coordinate with the, um... 298 00:09:42,027 --> 00:09:43,162 hourly pass-bys of the... 299 00:09:43,196 --> 00:09:44,630 Wait. What was that? 300 00:09:44,663 --> 00:09:46,198 That was me talking about hourly pass-bys. 301 00:09:46,231 --> 00:09:48,100 Oh, yeah, I heard about the hourly pass-bys. 302 00:09:48,133 --> 00:09:50,137 Twice. I meant... 303 00:09:50,170 --> 00:09:52,606 That subtle side look. 304 00:09:52,638 --> 00:09:54,007 There was no subtle side look. 305 00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:55,242 You're right, 'cause it wasn't subtle. 306 00:09:55,274 --> 00:09:58,077 It was an unsubtle side look at... 307 00:09:58,110 --> 00:09:59,245 that dress in the shop. 308 00:09:59,278 --> 00:10:00,780 Why are you being such a nutjob 309 00:10:00,814 --> 00:10:02,115 about looking for a wedding dress? 310 00:10:02,148 --> 00:10:04,884 Because being a female sergeant is difficult. 311 00:10:04,917 --> 00:10:06,085 I have to work twice as hard 312 00:10:06,119 --> 00:10:07,620 to gain my officers' respect, 313 00:10:07,653 --> 00:10:10,023 and looking at girly dresses isn't going to help. 314 00:10:10,056 --> 00:10:12,893 Plus, it's a new job, and I need to make it a priority. 315 00:10:12,926 --> 00:10:14,294 Dude, I get that, but if you want 316 00:10:14,326 --> 00:10:16,830 a beautiful wedding dress, you deserve to find one. 317 00:10:16,863 --> 00:10:17,898 Look, there are no cops around. 318 00:10:17,931 --> 00:10:19,199 Nobody's gonna see you. 319 00:10:19,231 --> 00:10:20,799 Why don't we just take our break now, 320 00:10:20,824 --> 00:10:21,825 try one on? 321 00:10:21,850 --> 00:10:23,385 - Okay? - Okay. 322 00:10:23,410 --> 00:10:24,814 - Okay? - Okay. 323 00:10:24,839 --> 00:10:25,905 - Okay? - Okay. 324 00:10:25,939 --> 00:10:28,342 Hell yeah! 325 00:10:28,374 --> 00:10:29,342 They are closed. 326 00:10:29,375 --> 00:10:31,043 - We will come back later. - Yeah. 327 00:10:31,076 --> 00:10:33,179 Where did Adrian go? He seemed upset. 328 00:10:33,212 --> 00:10:34,647 - Should we be worried? - Always. 329 00:10:34,681 --> 00:10:36,917 We should always be worried about him. 330 00:10:36,950 --> 00:10:38,652 Jake. Look, look. 331 00:10:38,693 --> 00:10:41,135 Excuse me, Troy Lunniker, we are... 332 00:10:41,190 --> 00:10:42,846 I know exactly who you are, you spot-stealing 333 00:10:42,893 --> 00:10:44,265 - son of a bitch! - I didn't steal your spot! 334 00:10:44,290 --> 00:10:45,325 - You were too slow, you idiot! - You did steal my spot, man. 335 00:10:45,358 --> 00:10:46,557 You with the horrible meatballs. 336 00:10:46,589 --> 00:10:47,927 You should call them crap balls, man! 337 00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:49,095 Oh, my food tastes like crap? 338 00:10:49,128 --> 00:10:50,797 Hey, hey, hey, hey! Stop. 339 00:10:50,830 --> 00:10:52,132 - Crap balls. - Hey! 340 00:10:52,165 --> 00:10:53,767 Look, Detective Boyle's truck burned down. 341 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:55,135 Yeah, and you did it. 342 00:10:55,167 --> 00:10:56,637 You torched my truck, and you're going to jail. 343 00:10:56,670 --> 00:10:58,805 Whoa. Someone burned down your truck? 344 00:10:58,837 --> 00:11:00,740 I'm sorry, man, but I would never do anything like that. 345 00:11:00,773 --> 00:11:01,975 I swear it wasn't me. 346 00:11:02,008 --> 00:11:03,643 Well, I'd love to believe you, Troy, 347 00:11:03,676 --> 00:11:06,212 but I'm afraid we're gonna need to see some proof. 348 00:11:06,245 --> 00:11:07,947 Oh, my God, he had so much proof. 349 00:11:07,980 --> 00:11:09,415 I can't believe he was on "Cash Cab" 350 00:11:09,449 --> 00:11:10,951 at the exact moment my truck burned down. 351 00:11:10,984 --> 00:11:12,219 And he did so well. 352 00:11:12,252 --> 00:11:14,186 He named every member of The Monkees. 353 00:11:14,220 --> 00:11:16,056 - He even got Tork. - No one gets Tork. 354 00:11:16,089 --> 00:11:17,257 I know. All right, so if it wasn't Troy, 355 00:11:17,290 --> 00:11:19,126 the question is, who could it have been? 356 00:11:19,959 --> 00:11:20,926 What's up, jerks? 357 00:11:22,162 --> 00:11:23,729 Pimento, you broke into my house? 358 00:11:23,763 --> 00:11:25,331 Yeah. I'm an insurance investigator. 359 00:11:25,364 --> 00:11:27,667 - I can do whatever I want. - What are you doing here? 360 00:11:27,701 --> 00:11:29,702 I'm working the case. I'm looking for clues. 361 00:11:29,735 --> 00:11:31,804 Come on, you already said Charles couldn't do this. 362 00:11:31,837 --> 00:11:32,972 - I couldn't do it. - That's what I thought. 363 00:11:33,005 --> 00:11:34,240 But then I realized, 364 00:11:34,273 --> 00:11:36,275 if you can hide your engagement from me, 365 00:11:36,308 --> 00:11:38,944 what else are you capable of hiding? 366 00:11:38,978 --> 00:11:40,414 Oh, right. Arson! 367 00:11:40,446 --> 00:11:42,249 Come on, don't you think that's a bit of a stretch? 368 00:11:42,282 --> 00:11:43,917 Is it? Lab tests came back 369 00:11:43,950 --> 00:11:46,753 and said the accelerant used in the fire was turpentine. 370 00:11:46,786 --> 00:11:50,757 And look what I found in Boyle's wife's closet. 371 00:11:50,790 --> 00:11:52,392 Looks to me a lot like turpentine. 372 00:11:52,425 --> 00:11:55,762 Oh, I wouldn't do that. 373 00:11:55,795 --> 00:11:57,264 Turpentine, just like I thought. 374 00:11:57,297 --> 00:11:59,432 That's Genevieve's. She uses it for her paintings. 375 00:11:59,465 --> 00:12:03,269 Oh, likely story. 376 00:12:03,302 --> 00:12:05,905 If that's the case, then how do you explain this 377 00:12:05,939 --> 00:12:06,907 that I found on your fridge? 378 00:12:06,940 --> 00:12:07,907 My wedding invitation? 379 00:12:07,941 --> 00:12:09,276 Aha, so you admit it. 380 00:12:09,308 --> 00:12:11,177 Invites have gone out, and I didn't get one! 381 00:12:11,210 --> 00:12:13,279 Oh, well, well, well. 382 00:12:13,312 --> 00:12:15,282 Now you both are gonna pay. 383 00:12:15,315 --> 00:12:16,717 - Adrian. - Hey, come on. 384 00:12:16,749 --> 00:12:18,051 Oh, I thought you were reaching for a gun. 385 00:12:18,084 --> 00:12:19,152 Oh, no, my friend. 386 00:12:19,185 --> 00:12:20,821 This is much worse than a gun. 387 00:12:20,854 --> 00:12:21,988 This is a stamp, 388 00:12:22,021 --> 00:12:23,323 a stamp that says... 389 00:12:24,923 --> 00:12:26,025 Denied. 390 00:12:26,058 --> 00:12:28,461 Your claim is denied. 391 00:12:37,348 --> 00:12:38,983 Do you really think the insurance company 392 00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:41,413 will replace Adrian as the investigator on my case? 393 00:12:41,438 --> 00:12:42,664 Yeah. It's Gray Star Mutual... 394 00:12:42,696 --> 00:12:44,130 "Where the feeling is mutual." 395 00:12:44,163 --> 00:12:47,467 And right now we're feeling like we want a new investigator. 396 00:12:47,500 --> 00:12:48,534 Hi, I'm Travis. 397 00:12:48,567 --> 00:12:50,002 I've been reviewing your appeal. 398 00:12:50,036 --> 00:12:52,072 I understand you have a problem with Mr. Pimento. 399 00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:53,539 Yes, we sort of have 400 00:12:53,572 --> 00:12:55,509 a complicated preexisting relationship, 401 00:12:55,542 --> 00:12:57,076 which I think is a conflict of interest. 402 00:12:57,110 --> 00:12:58,644 Okay, I'll be honest, 403 00:12:58,677 --> 00:13:01,081 we've had some problems with Mr. Pimento before. 404 00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:03,249 I think he may have broken into my apartment once. 405 00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:05,085 Oh, you'd know. He leaves a lot of hair behind. 406 00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:06,552 - He's a shedder. - Mm-hmm. 407 00:13:06,586 --> 00:13:08,087 Okay. I'll talk to my supervisor, 408 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:09,121 see what can be done. 409 00:13:09,154 --> 00:13:10,756 Great. Thank you very much. 410 00:13:10,789 --> 00:13:13,493 See, Charles? Things are starting to look up. 411 00:13:13,527 --> 00:13:14,628 Up your butt! 412 00:13:14,661 --> 00:13:16,497 Adrian! What a coincidence. 413 00:13:16,529 --> 00:13:18,511 We were just... filing a complaint about you. 414 00:13:18,550 --> 00:13:19,490 You were obviously listening. 415 00:13:19,533 --> 00:13:20,500 I don't know why I'm trying to lie. 416 00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:21,768 Oh, we're locked in. Great. 417 00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:23,570 First you cut me out of your lives, 418 00:13:23,602 --> 00:13:25,638 then you try and get me fired? 419 00:13:25,672 --> 00:13:27,240 My therapist was right about you guys. 420 00:13:27,273 --> 00:13:29,809 - You're a couple of dinguses. - You have a therapist? 421 00:13:29,842 --> 00:13:31,544 Yeah, he's helping me work on my rotator cuff. 422 00:13:31,577 --> 00:13:32,745 Oh, I see, it's a physical therapist. 423 00:13:32,778 --> 00:13:34,914 Oh, he's very physical, Charles. 424 00:13:34,947 --> 00:13:36,283 Very physical. 425 00:13:39,586 --> 00:13:40,721 So what do you think? 426 00:13:40,754 --> 00:13:42,788 Mm, I don't love the sash. 427 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:44,524 But it's fine. I'm just gonna get it. 428 00:13:44,557 --> 00:13:46,092 What? That's the first one you tried on. 429 00:13:46,125 --> 00:13:49,196 I once saw you look at 54 different accordion folders 430 00:13:49,229 --> 00:13:51,698 and not buy any of them due to weak tabs. 431 00:13:51,730 --> 00:13:54,033 I file hard. I need strong tabs. 432 00:13:54,067 --> 00:13:56,537 I just don't want to take up any more time. 433 00:13:56,570 --> 00:13:58,672 Your break's not even a quarter done. 434 00:13:58,705 --> 00:13:59,806 I'll stay another ten minutes. 435 00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:01,174 You'll stay until I dismiss you. 436 00:14:01,206 --> 00:14:03,445 Irene, music. 437 00:14:03,478 --> 00:14:04,853 Now spin. 438 00:14:04,878 --> 00:14:07,080 All units, attempted 1030-Charlie. 439 00:14:07,113 --> 00:14:09,716 Bodega on Smith. Perp is heading east on Baltic. 440 00:14:09,749 --> 00:14:12,286 That's us! We're on Baltic. 441 00:14:12,318 --> 00:14:14,820 Oh, crap. That was him! 442 00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:15,822 Hey! 443 00:14:16,990 --> 00:14:18,558 NYPD, stop! 444 00:14:23,129 --> 00:14:24,831 Hey! 445 00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:36,576 - Stay down! - Damn, sarge. 446 00:14:36,610 --> 00:14:38,579 Maybe I do like the sash. 447 00:14:38,611 --> 00:14:39,812 Sir, brace yourself. 448 00:14:39,846 --> 00:14:41,782 Olivia Crawford just tweeted a post 449 00:14:41,815 --> 00:14:43,216 of an officer carrying a woman 450 00:14:43,249 --> 00:14:44,784 through knee-deep flood waters. 451 00:14:44,817 --> 00:14:46,986 Spoiler alert: they are of different races. 452 00:14:47,019 --> 00:14:48,288 Terry teared up. 453 00:14:48,321 --> 00:14:49,923 I love when calamity brings people together. 454 00:14:49,956 --> 00:14:52,259 Sir, it got another retweet from the mayor. 455 00:14:52,292 --> 00:14:53,894 It got a retweet from the governor. 456 00:14:53,927 --> 00:14:55,696 Well, I have already set up my accounts, 457 00:14:55,729 --> 00:14:58,131 and not to toot my own bugle, 458 00:14:58,163 --> 00:14:59,966 but I think I did an admirable job. 459 00:14:59,999 --> 00:15:02,201 Oh, okay, what's your handle? I'll be your first follower. 460 00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:09,743 It's @5261796d6e6420486f6c74. 461 00:15:09,775 --> 00:15:12,111 It spells "Raymond Holt" in hexadecimal code. 462 00:15:12,144 --> 00:15:13,947 - Clever, right? - Captain, are you sure 463 00:15:13,980 --> 00:15:15,349 you wouldn't like some help with this? 464 00:15:15,381 --> 00:15:17,183 Oh, no need. Now, for my first tweet, 465 00:15:17,216 --> 00:15:19,251 I think I should give an update on the water main break 466 00:15:19,284 --> 00:15:20,920 that's actually informative. 467 00:15:20,953 --> 00:15:26,892 "NYC H20-Main SITREP: at 2040 EDT 468 00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:33,133 current PSI 456 MAX CAP 204000 LPM." 469 00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:36,670 Suck on that tasty lemon drop, Olivia Crawford. 470 00:15:36,702 --> 00:15:38,304 Oh, look at that. An alert. 471 00:15:38,337 --> 00:15:40,006 I'm probably trending already. 472 00:15:40,039 --> 00:15:41,841 What? My account has been deactivated? 473 00:15:41,874 --> 00:15:43,275 Twitter thinks you're a bot. 474 00:15:43,308 --> 00:15:45,379 Why? I am a human. 475 00:15:45,412 --> 00:15:46,722 I am a human male. 476 00:15:48,214 --> 00:15:49,316 Adrian, open up. 477 00:15:49,349 --> 00:15:50,651 Get out of here, Travis! 478 00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:51,751 Come on, Adrian, admit it. 479 00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:53,052 You have a conflict of interest. 480 00:15:53,086 --> 00:15:54,821 How could I have a conflict of interest? 481 00:15:54,854 --> 00:15:56,723 We barely have a relationship. 482 00:15:56,755 --> 00:15:58,190 We're not even friends anymore. 483 00:15:58,224 --> 00:16:00,427 - You saw to that, didn't you? - That's crazy. 484 00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:02,129 We may have lost touch, but we're still friends. 485 00:16:02,162 --> 00:16:05,065 Oh, is that right, Jake? Are we still friends? 486 00:16:05,097 --> 00:16:07,333 If that's the case, then when did I lose my virginity? 487 00:16:07,366 --> 00:16:08,701 Oh, man, you've told us 488 00:16:08,735 --> 00:16:10,336 so many intense graphic sex stories. 489 00:16:10,370 --> 00:16:12,806 I have! But a true friend 490 00:16:12,839 --> 00:16:15,042 always remembers a friend's first. 491 00:16:15,075 --> 00:16:17,343 Jake, we know this! It's got to be one of the swamps. 492 00:16:17,376 --> 00:16:19,346 Uh, Florida swamp, or Okefenokee Swamp, or... 493 00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:20,681 oh, was it a bayou? 494 00:16:20,714 --> 00:16:21,748 No, no, no! I've got it. 495 00:16:21,780 --> 00:16:22,948 Summer of '91, at a screening 496 00:16:22,981 --> 00:16:24,384 of "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves." 497 00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:27,254 Well done. It was Bryan Adams' soundtrack 498 00:16:27,287 --> 00:16:29,956 and Kevin Costner's flawless British accent 499 00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:32,893 that put us in the mood to get gross. 500 00:16:32,926 --> 00:16:34,828 Next question. Favorite shape? 501 00:16:34,860 --> 00:16:36,028 - Oval? - Of course! 502 00:16:36,062 --> 00:16:37,964 - Favorite scent? - Trick question. 503 00:16:37,996 --> 00:16:39,966 You lost your sense of smell in a... 504 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:41,033 Shipwreck! 505 00:16:41,067 --> 00:16:43,169 Guys, we are friends! 506 00:16:43,202 --> 00:16:46,105 Aww, I love you guys. 507 00:16:47,506 --> 00:16:49,008 Are you still angry? 508 00:16:49,042 --> 00:16:50,711 No, that was a cathartic scream of love. 509 00:16:50,744 --> 00:16:51,711 - Understood. - Good. 510 00:16:51,745 --> 00:16:52,745 Well, anyways, I'm sorry 511 00:16:52,778 --> 00:16:53,813 about how things went down, man. 512 00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:55,115 We should have stayed in touch. 513 00:16:55,148 --> 00:16:56,983 No, it's just as much my fault as yours. 514 00:16:57,015 --> 00:16:58,851 I could have kept in touch with you guys 515 00:16:58,884 --> 00:17:00,986 and probably should have told you about my new family. 516 00:17:01,019 --> 00:17:02,088 Your new what now? 517 00:17:02,121 --> 00:17:04,123 Ah, Travis. Great, you're here. 518 00:17:04,157 --> 00:17:06,393 These gentlemen are innocent and are free to go. 519 00:17:06,426 --> 00:17:08,195 - You're fired, Adrian. - What? 520 00:17:08,227 --> 00:17:10,931 And as for you, my supervisor and I reviewed your case. 521 00:17:10,963 --> 00:17:12,932 Turpentine is all the proof we need to deny your claim. 522 00:17:12,965 --> 00:17:16,002 The feeling wasn't mutual. 523 00:17:19,320 --> 00:17:21,258 You're so lame, you know that, Travis? 524 00:17:21,305 --> 00:17:23,258 Wait a second. Is this just because I did molly 525 00:17:23,328 --> 00:17:24,862 - with your daughter? - You did? 526 00:17:24,938 --> 00:17:26,257 Don't think he knew about that. 527 00:17:26,282 --> 00:17:27,686 Just don't ever come back here again. 528 00:17:27,711 --> 00:17:29,102 If you do, I'll have you arrested. 529 00:17:29,135 --> 00:17:30,569 How dare you? 530 00:17:30,594 --> 00:17:31,971 I gave you the best two weeks of my life! 531 00:17:32,005 --> 00:17:34,641 Oh, guys, I'm so screwed. We got no leads. 532 00:17:34,673 --> 00:17:35,641 I'm not gonna get any of the money back. 533 00:17:35,675 --> 00:17:36,910 What do we do? 534 00:17:36,942 --> 00:17:39,145 We go directly to Travis' house right now, 535 00:17:39,179 --> 00:17:40,546 pee on everything he owns, 536 00:17:40,580 --> 00:17:41,749 and then burn that place to the ground. 537 00:17:41,782 --> 00:17:42,916 - Adrian, that's it. - It is? 538 00:17:42,948 --> 00:17:44,485 - Yes! I knew it! - No, no, no. 539 00:17:44,517 --> 00:17:46,018 Not anything about anything you said. 540 00:17:46,052 --> 00:17:47,821 But, Charles, didn't you just tell me you fired someone? 541 00:17:47,853 --> 00:17:49,722 Yeah, Ted. I took him out to dinner. 542 00:17:49,756 --> 00:17:50,990 He thought he was getting a promotion. 543 00:17:51,024 --> 00:17:52,244 It was a whole thing. 544 00:17:52,269 --> 00:17:53,727 He wept a lot. Not as much as me... 545 00:17:53,759 --> 00:17:55,440 Yeah, but the point is, he was upset, right? 546 00:17:55,465 --> 00:17:57,205 And he knew where you liked to park the truck. 547 00:17:57,230 --> 00:18:00,134 Uh-huh. And he never gave me my key back. 548 00:18:00,167 --> 00:18:02,136 He said he lost it. You really think it's him? 549 00:18:02,169 --> 00:18:03,441 I mean, it's just a hunch, but... 550 00:18:03,466 --> 00:18:04,871 We should go to his house and burn it down. 551 00:18:04,904 --> 00:18:06,139 I was gonna say we could go investigate. 552 00:18:06,172 --> 00:18:07,407 Sure, sure, sure. 553 00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:08,608 And then burn it to the ground. 554 00:18:08,641 --> 00:18:10,177 No. No burning of anything! 555 00:18:10,209 --> 00:18:11,691 What? I already got the match lit. 556 00:18:11,745 --> 00:18:13,611 - How? - Let's hurry up and get there. 557 00:18:14,113 --> 00:18:16,656 Captain, I'm trying to get your account reinstated, 558 00:18:16,681 --> 00:18:17,785 but it could take a while. 559 00:18:17,817 --> 00:18:19,437 They say they have a lot of Nazi stuff 560 00:18:19,462 --> 00:18:20,453 on the front burner. 561 00:18:20,487 --> 00:18:21,462 And when you tweet again, 562 00:18:21,487 --> 00:18:23,657 you should probably stop communicating in numbers, kay? 563 00:18:23,689 --> 00:18:25,625 There's a 0% chance of that. 564 00:18:25,659 --> 00:18:26,893 Besides, I won't be tweeting anymore. 565 00:18:26,927 --> 00:18:28,529 I just got off the phone with the head 566 00:18:28,562 --> 00:18:29,897 - of the selection committee. - You did? 567 00:18:29,929 --> 00:18:31,899 Apparently, one of the candidates for commissioner 568 00:18:31,931 --> 00:18:34,066 tweeted a picture of the water main break 569 00:18:34,100 --> 00:18:35,836 and accidentally included a link 570 00:18:35,869 --> 00:18:37,538 to his favorite pornographic website... 571 00:18:37,571 --> 00:18:39,006 - Mm. - Cosplay-butts-n-boobs.com. 572 00:18:39,038 --> 00:18:40,039 Amateur move. 573 00:18:40,073 --> 00:18:42,141 You should never copy-paste if you're a perv. 574 00:18:42,175 --> 00:18:44,645 It's quite the scandal. The candidate has dropped out. 575 00:18:44,678 --> 00:18:45,946 It's down to just three of us now. 576 00:18:45,978 --> 00:18:48,582 So I guess this proves I was right all along. 577 00:18:48,614 --> 00:18:50,450 Social media... it's a fool's game, 578 00:18:50,484 --> 00:18:51,818 and only a fool would play. 579 00:18:51,866 --> 00:18:52,867 Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 580 00:18:52,899 --> 00:18:55,771 And why is Cheddar wearing a beret? 581 00:18:57,371 --> 00:18:58,806 Uh... 582 00:18:58,839 --> 00:19:00,974 Kevin saw your photos and was amused, 583 00:19:01,008 --> 00:19:03,545 so we started an Instagram account for Cheddar, 584 00:19:03,578 --> 00:19:06,047 who now has over 14,000 followers. 585 00:19:06,079 --> 00:19:07,349 Hoo-whee! 586 00:19:07,381 --> 00:19:08,949 It's an incredible feeling. 587 00:19:08,983 --> 00:19:10,551 This is insulting. 588 00:19:10,585 --> 00:19:12,053 First you fire me in front of my family. 589 00:19:12,086 --> 00:19:13,688 Ooh, Charles, his family was at the dinner? 590 00:19:13,721 --> 00:19:14,756 It was not well-handled. 591 00:19:14,789 --> 00:19:15,790 Now you accuse me of arson. 592 00:19:15,822 --> 00:19:16,957 Just get out of my garage. 593 00:19:16,991 --> 00:19:18,393 Hey, Ted? 594 00:19:18,426 --> 00:19:19,961 How come you have all this turpentine? 595 00:19:19,993 --> 00:19:22,597 And this plastic bag filled with matches and magnesium strips. 596 00:19:22,629 --> 00:19:23,964 I found it buried under the back porch, 597 00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:25,899 and I'm no expert, but it seems like 598 00:19:25,933 --> 00:19:28,936 that's the kind of stuff you'd use to light a fire, right? 599 00:19:28,970 --> 00:19:31,039 Oh, there he goes. 600 00:19:33,474 --> 00:19:35,843 Say it with me, Jake. 601 00:19:35,877 --> 00:19:36,778 You've been... 602 00:19:36,810 --> 00:19:38,512 - Denied! - Butt-slammed! 603 00:19:38,545 --> 00:19:40,814 - Wait, what? - Denied, like the stamp? 604 00:19:40,848 --> 00:19:43,784 Oh, that is so much better. 605 00:19:43,818 --> 00:19:45,954 "Butt-slammed" is so stupid. 606 00:19:46,788 --> 00:19:48,656 Oh, is that the wedding dress 607 00:19:48,688 --> 00:19:50,992 from the Erica Somerfield 2018 fall collection? 608 00:19:51,024 --> 00:19:53,026 No way, the bodice is totally different. 609 00:19:53,060 --> 00:19:54,963 Why do you two know so much about wedding dresses? 610 00:19:54,995 --> 00:19:56,663 They're the only thing you can look at around here 611 00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:57,831 with safe search on! 612 00:19:57,865 --> 00:19:59,434 All right, that's enough. 613 00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:00,734 Can we all get back to police work 614 00:20:00,768 --> 00:20:02,737 and stop talking about wedding dresses? 615 00:20:02,770 --> 00:20:04,472 No. We're gonna talk about them, 616 00:20:04,504 --> 00:20:06,006 because while wearing a wedding dress, 617 00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:07,474 you leapt over a couch, 618 00:20:07,508 --> 00:20:09,077 sprinted down an alley, and jumped off a car 619 00:20:09,109 --> 00:20:11,612 to subdue the crap out of a perp like you were Wonder Woman. 620 00:20:11,646 --> 00:20:12,946 It was pretty cool, wasn't it? 621 00:20:12,980 --> 00:20:15,683 Amy, you are an amazing cop and a great leader, 622 00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:17,685 and you have proven that a billion times over. 623 00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:19,420 You can't let other people's opinions get in the way 624 00:20:19,454 --> 00:20:21,156 of what you want, especially because other people suck. 625 00:20:21,188 --> 00:20:22,756 Well, if I'm being honest, 626 00:20:22,790 --> 00:20:24,058 - I would like a prettier dress. - There you go. 627 00:20:24,090 --> 00:20:25,659 And I would like it to have some lace. 628 00:20:25,693 --> 00:20:26,895 - Uh-huh. - And a sweetheart neckline, 629 00:20:26,927 --> 00:20:28,629 - thank you very much. - What else? 630 00:20:28,663 --> 00:20:30,432 And I want a mermaid cut with tulip sleeves. 631 00:20:30,464 --> 00:20:31,765 Say it again. Say it loud. 632 00:20:31,799 --> 00:20:35,570 A mermaid cut with tulip frickin' sleeves! 633 00:20:35,602 --> 00:20:37,504 Pimento's here! All right! 634 00:20:37,538 --> 00:20:38,772 Thanks so much for that text, man. 635 00:20:38,806 --> 00:20:40,074 - That meant a lot. - The one that said, 636 00:20:40,107 --> 00:20:41,843 - "Want to grab a drink tonight?" - Yeah. 637 00:20:41,876 --> 00:20:43,677 Hey, Boyle, did you get that insurance payout? 638 00:20:43,711 --> 00:20:45,180 Yes, I am out of the food truck business, 639 00:20:45,213 --> 00:20:47,303 and I no longer start spontaneously weeping. 640 00:20:47,328 --> 00:20:49,851 - Nice. - Listen, I'm sorry you got fired. 641 00:20:49,884 --> 00:20:51,752 Oh, don't worry about it. I got myself fired, all right? 642 00:20:51,785 --> 00:20:54,154 Plus, doesn't matter. I got a way better job now. 643 00:20:54,187 --> 00:20:56,925 I'm working at one of those fancy hand lotion stores. 644 00:20:56,957 --> 00:20:58,792 Spoiler alert: I have a gun again, 645 00:20:58,826 --> 00:21:00,995 and I've gotten to use it three times. 646 00:21:01,028 --> 00:21:03,531 You would be surprised how often teenage girls 647 00:21:03,563 --> 00:21:05,286 try and shoplift mango hand cream. 648 00:21:05,311 --> 00:21:07,535 - Huh. - But it smells great! 649 00:21:07,568 --> 00:21:08,837 - I love it. - I can get you some. 650 00:21:08,869 --> 00:21:10,671 Well, listen, man, I've got something for you. 651 00:21:10,704 --> 00:21:11,806 Really? For me? 652 00:21:11,839 --> 00:21:12,840 It's an invitation to my wedding. 653 00:21:12,874 --> 00:21:15,176 Aw, Jake, I am so honored 654 00:21:15,208 --> 00:21:16,217 and would love to be... 655 00:21:16,242 --> 00:21:17,879 oh, nope, I can't make this. 656 00:21:17,912 --> 00:21:19,514 This is the same night as Lady Gaga. 657 00:21:19,547 --> 00:21:20,748 Oh, thank God. I didn't run it by Amy, 658 00:21:20,781 --> 00:21:22,250 so this worked out great for both of us! 659 00:21:22,282 --> 00:21:23,618 But honestly, 660 00:21:23,650 --> 00:21:24,785 nobody's gonna come to this, 661 00:21:24,819 --> 00:21:26,221 because everybody's gonna be at Gaga. 662 00:21:26,253 --> 00:21:27,789 - Not a doctor. - Shh. 663 00:21:27,828 --> 00:21:32,828 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com 49785

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