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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:21,592 Hello, Naomi. 2 00:01:22,320 --> 00:01:24,038 Count your lucky stars, babe. 3 00:01:24,280 --> 00:01:26,874 Bud Bundy's in the house. 4 00:01:28,280 --> 00:01:29,713 Bud Bundy? 5 00:01:30,680 --> 00:01:33,148 We met at the frat party last weekend. 6 00:01:33,400 --> 00:01:35,755 I was the one who found your underwear. 7 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:38,791 On the ceiling, right. 8 00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:42,072 Say, listen, seems I have a last-minute cancellation... 9 00:01:42,320 --> 00:01:45,073 ...in my social calendar any night of the week... 10 00:01:45,760 --> 00:01:47,751 ...and, well, I was wondering if you'd like-- 11 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:50,230 You would? This Saturday night? 12 00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:53,199 Okay, Al. I'm ready. 13 00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:55,829 I'm gonna call you right back with the address, okay? 14 00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:58,799 My masseuse is just leaving. 15 00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:10,274 Let's go, Al. 16 00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:13,072 Oh, feeling any better, Bud? 17 00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:17,155 Is that you, Ma? 18 00:02:18,440 --> 00:02:21,557 Oh, I just feel awful that you and Kelly got sick... 19 00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:24,360 ...and can't come with us to my family reunion. 20 00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:26,989 And I really hate to leave you in this condition. 21 00:02:27,240 --> 00:02:31,597 After all, I wouldn't want people to think I'm an unfit parent. 22 00:02:33,080 --> 00:02:34,638 Let's see this. 23 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:37,479 Ninety-eight point six. 24 00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:39,199 Is that good? 25 00:02:40,920 --> 00:02:42,148 Nope. 26 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:45,312 Oh, maybe I really should stay home. 27 00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:47,596 I hate to miss out on the festivities though. 28 00:02:47,840 --> 00:02:49,432 This year they're gonna celebrate... 29 00:02:49,640 --> 00:02:52,677 ...the first annual Wanker County Olympic Games. 30 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:55,831 Damn this fever. 31 00:02:57,520 --> 00:03:00,830 You and Dad have a tire-hugging good time. 32 00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:06,154 Oh, we will. Bye, Buck. Bye, house. Bye, couch. 33 00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:08,834 Oh, boy. 34 00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:12,790 Let's go, Al. 35 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:26,791 - Oh, Peg, do I have to? - Yes. 36 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:28,837 As the only non-blood relative invited... 37 00:03:29,080 --> 00:03:31,435 ...they're counting on you to officiate the Olympics. 38 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:35,719 Now, let's go before we miss the ceremonial lighting of cousin Jeb. 39 00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:39,638 Oh, all right. Have we got everything? 40 00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:42,474 - The water-purification tablets? - Check. 41 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,473 The meat-fish-grain purification tablets? 42 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:48,871 - Check. - The Wanker translation book? 43 00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:52,396 - You know, English to gibberish. - Check. 44 00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:55,438 Dad, you want me to take the bag to the car? 45 00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:57,636 No, she can walk. 46 00:04:00,560 --> 00:04:03,074 Listen, if you don't hear from me at least once a day... 47 00:04:03,320 --> 00:04:07,154 ...Aunt Skeeter probably violated parole and baked me into one of her pies. 48 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:09,598 In which case, call 911... 49 00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:13,310 ...or as they say in Wanker County, "Nine hundred and eleven." 50 00:04:14,840 --> 00:04:16,831 Hey, Bud, guess what? 51 00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:20,959 Damn this fever. 52 00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:22,792 When will it end? 53 00:04:23,040 --> 00:04:25,315 Oh, poor thing. 54 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:28,592 Hey, Peg, I think I'm coming down with something. 55 00:04:30,280 --> 00:04:33,477 Yes. You're coming down with me to Wanker County. 56 00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:36,917 Bags, then go. 57 00:04:38,240 --> 00:04:39,992 Come on. 58 00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:48,672 - Well, they're gone. - For a whole week. 59 00:04:48,920 --> 00:04:50,239 And guess what, Kel? 60 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:53,916 Saturday night I got a shot at a babe who hasn't used the word "no"... 61 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:57,709 ...since the last time someone asked her if she ever used the word "no." 62 00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:02,395 Well, what if I said that I needed the house next Saturday night? 63 00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:04,835 What if you said you were on fire? 64 00:05:05,280 --> 00:05:07,555 I mean, either way it means nothing to me. 65 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:11,836 Then you'll have to tell the little children they'll never learn to read. 66 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:15,436 Kel, there's nothing you can say to me right now that-- 67 00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:21,028 Tell what little children they'll never learn to read? 68 00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:25,398 Well, you know that anti-illiteracy campaign that I've been so active in? 69 00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:31,357 - No. - That's the one. 70 00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:32,828 You see, Budrick... 71 00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:35,594 ...these kids look at me as the Verminator... 72 00:05:35,840 --> 00:05:40,038 ...and all they see is glamour and bright lights and deadly poison... 73 00:05:40,280 --> 00:05:44,273 ...but I'm more than just a sexy chick who kills bugs. I'm a role model. 74 00:05:44,520 --> 00:05:47,796 So I volunteered to shoot a public service announcement in the house... 75 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:49,678 ...to encourage them to read. 76 00:05:54,160 --> 00:05:56,833 But, Kel, you can't read. 77 00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:01,877 Yeah, well, you can't score, but you still have a bed. 78 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:09,834 I just thought that it was time that I gave something back to the community. 79 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:13,755 Well, judging by the lines at the free clinic you already have. 80 00:06:18,280 --> 00:06:20,191 You know, that's the sort of crack... 81 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:24,109 ...that would make the old Kelly call you a "rubber-loving Barbie thumper." 82 00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:27,838 But that's the old Kelly. 83 00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:29,957 The new Kelly is simply gonna ask you... 84 00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:32,156 ...to let me have the house next Saturday... 85 00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:36,069 ...so I can show these kids the beauty of The Little Engine That Could. 86 00:06:36,960 --> 00:06:38,632 I loved The Little Engine That Could. 87 00:06:38,840 --> 00:06:42,958 Yeah, we all did, Bud, but some of us have moved on. 88 00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:46,279 "'Puff, puff, chug, chug,' went the little blue engine." 89 00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:51,595 "'I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. 90 00:06:51,840 --> 00:06:54,149 I think I can."' 91 00:06:59,240 --> 00:07:02,915 You know, this would make a great TV movie starring Robert Urich... 92 00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:05,833 ...or that brawny Facts of Life girl. 93 00:07:09,320 --> 00:07:12,596 Wait a second, what's that smell? 94 00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:14,559 It's you. 95 00:07:14,800 --> 00:07:17,553 Bud, you smell good. What's wrong? 96 00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:19,759 It's my brand-new scent. 97 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,718 Guaranteed to attract the ladies. 98 00:07:21,960 --> 00:07:23,598 Yeah? What's it called? 99 00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:27,511 "Simply Abe." 100 00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:37,030 And if that's not enough, I got another buck taped to my thigh. 101 00:07:37,920 --> 00:07:40,275 - Well, good luck. - Thanks. 102 00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:44,035 And have fun doing your commercial. 103 00:07:44,360 --> 00:07:46,032 Thank you. 104 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,110 - Bye. - See you. 105 00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:54,949 Okay. He's gone. 106 00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:11,515 Thanks. I was getting kind of bored out there, so I took some pictures. 107 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:13,398 See? 108 00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:18,713 This one here's from the house across the street. 109 00:08:18,960 --> 00:08:20,678 It's nice. Thank you. 110 00:08:20,920 --> 00:08:23,992 Where the hell does she find these guys? 111 00:08:25,160 --> 00:08:27,549 So you wanna fool around on the couch? 112 00:08:27,800 --> 00:08:29,438 Relax, Gunther, we've got hours. 113 00:08:29,640 --> 00:08:32,108 I mean, Bud really thinks I'm shooting a commercial. 114 00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:36,118 - What a Mormon. - I know. 115 00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:41,150 So you wanna fool around on the couch? 116 00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:44,278 Gunther, you don't just come into my house... 117 00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:46,715 ...covered with oil, smoking a smelly cigar... 118 00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:49,190 ...and ask me to fool around on my mother's couch. 119 00:08:49,440 --> 00:08:51,431 I mean, that would be a sign of low breeding. 120 00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:56,358 Here, we'll fool around on the floor behind the couch. 121 00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:03,153 Gunther, what did you forget to do? 122 00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:08,315 - Oh. Sorry. - Well, take it out. 123 00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:15,911 - Is that better? - Yes. 124 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:29,436 I know this may not be quite as comfortable... 125 00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:31,835 ...as what you're used to, my dear... 126 00:09:32,600 --> 00:09:36,752 ...but personally, I find making love indoors restrictive. 127 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:40,709 So I'm glad that attendant threw us out of his photomat. 128 00:09:41,120 --> 00:09:43,793 You're as broke as a two-dollar wristwatch, aren't you? 129 00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:47,237 And hornier than a funeral in New Orleans, baby. 130 00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:53,268 Shall we? 131 00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:57,192 - No. - No? 132 00:09:58,600 --> 00:10:00,909 Where'd you pick up that kind of language? 133 00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:04,952 Look, I don't know what kind of tramp you think I am. 134 00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:07,390 Just because a man can build a nest like a wren... 135 00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:10,279 ...doesn't mean I'll make out with him. Goodbye. 136 00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:15,910 But I'm wearing "Simply Abe." 137 00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:29,356 You know, Kelly, I can't help but feel... 138 00:10:29,560 --> 00:10:33,633 ...that this is, in some small way, my fault. 139 00:10:35,080 --> 00:10:36,752 See you. 140 00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:43,352 Who's gonna tell Mom you burnt up her couch? 141 00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:46,035 Wait, wait a second. 142 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:49,750 I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. 143 00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:03,118 I can't believe you burned down Mom's couch. 144 00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:07,797 Well, I can't believe you bought that stupid "concern for illiteracy" crap. 145 00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:10,395 If you had doubted me the way you're supposed to... 146 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:12,756 ...this never would have happened. 147 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:15,309 Nice try, pyro-nymph. 148 00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:20,272 - Bud, you've got to help me. - Oh, well, sure. 149 00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:23,353 If you don't mind living a life of servitude and degradation... 150 00:11:23,560 --> 00:11:26,279 ...I hear Saudi Arabia needs blonds. 151 00:11:27,440 --> 00:11:30,830 I am not asking for me. I'm asking for Mom. 152 00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:34,356 I mean, this couch is her life. She can't go on without it. 153 00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:39,071 Bud, if she finds out about this it could kill her. 154 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,872 Kelly, don't you think you're exaggerating just a little? 155 00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:50,559 - Hello? - Is my couch okay? 156 00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:55,035 Your couch? Why, yes, Mom. It's fine. It's lovely. 157 00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:58,078 - Why do you ask? - Well, the funniest thing... 158 00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:02,916 ...for no reason, my rear end suddenly got warm. 159 00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:05,956 Mom, what could have happened to the couch... 160 00:12:06,200 --> 00:12:09,078 ...that's worse than you and Dad sitting on it, right? 161 00:12:09,560 --> 00:12:12,233 Yeah. I guess I'm just being silly. 162 00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:15,995 - Anyway, wanna say hi to your father? - No. 163 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:22,952 Last contestant in the rooster toss: Cousin Zeke. 164 00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:32,268 Okay. That's 40 feet. That's a winner. 165 00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:34,715 Congratulations, Zeke. 166 00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:40,193 We shall now have the ceremonial running of the pigs. 167 00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:44,999 Not at me, you hillbillies! 168 00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:49,837 Well, you guys have fun... 169 00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:52,230 ...and don't worry about the couch, okay? 170 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:56,758 - Say goodbye to Dad for me. - Al, the kids said goodbye. 171 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:59,560 Peg! To Serve Man... 172 00:12:59,800 --> 00:13:02,394 ...it's a cookbook! 173 00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:09,113 - Bud, we're doomed. - "We"? Wait a second. 174 00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:12,158 I didn't have anything to do with this. I was out with a girl. 175 00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:15,153 And you really think they're gonna believe that? 176 00:13:17,400 --> 00:13:19,356 Okay, I'll help. 177 00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:23,192 If we're gonna get a new couch, we need is a picture of the old one. 178 00:13:23,440 --> 00:13:26,830 Great idea. Bud, you are a genius. 179 00:13:32,240 --> 00:13:33,992 Alrighty. Now what? 180 00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:38,396 Now we send this to Ripley's along with your picture. 181 00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:44,955 I meant a picture before the fire. 182 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:47,509 Okay, I'm gonna get Mom's photo album. 183 00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:51,435 There's probably more pictures of the couch in here than there are of us. 184 00:13:57,080 --> 00:13:58,308 I can't believe it. 185 00:13:58,560 --> 00:14:01,154 Went to every store in town and nobody had that couch. 186 00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:03,709 Well, I say we get the Guadalajara Yellow Pages... 187 00:14:03,920 --> 00:14:05,911 ...and start calling Goodwill. 188 00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:08,557 Well, I will not give up. 189 00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:11,598 The good thing is is that we still have another week to look. 190 00:14:12,960 --> 00:14:14,188 Hello? 191 00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:18,109 Honey, we're coming home early. Your father's had a little accident. 192 00:14:18,360 --> 00:14:21,636 Accident, my ass! They skinned me alive, Peg. 193 00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:26,190 Well, you know, you know better than to stand too close to cousin Blinky... 194 00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:28,755 ...when he's filleting ferret. 195 00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:31,590 Anyway, Kelly, we're coming home tomorrow. 196 00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:33,671 And you know, I just can't wait to-- 197 00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:35,472 Bud, they're coming home tomorrow. 198 00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:39,429 Is there any way that I can talk you into taking full blame for this? 199 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:44,597 Sure. You can get me a woman who won't say no. 200 00:14:47,760 --> 00:14:49,716 So there's no way. 201 00:14:51,720 --> 00:14:53,676 Hey, guys. 202 00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:01,632 I got the scoop on your couch. 203 00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:04,553 I got some friends in the furniture business. 204 00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:07,030 Well, actually they're in... 205 00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:11,631 ...the "making false compartments in the furniture" business. 206 00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:14,673 - But they gave me the lowdown. - Oh, please, let this be easy. 207 00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:16,911 Please, please, please. 208 00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:20,232 This is not going to be easy. 209 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:22,278 This may come as a surprise to you... 210 00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:26,229 ...but your couch wasn't exactly a popular item. 211 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,189 How many were made? What, a thousand? Five hundred? 212 00:15:29,440 --> 00:15:31,556 - What? - Two. 213 00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:35,950 - Well, how many did they sell? - One. 214 00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:39,353 Great. Then all we gotta do is find the one that they sold. 215 00:15:39,560 --> 00:15:41,312 How hard could that be? 216 00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:47,076 Boy, when your looks go, you're dead. 217 00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:51,472 You're dead. 218 00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:54,714 Now, no one really knows where the other couch is... 219 00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:57,394 ...but I do know who made it and where he lives. 220 00:15:57,640 --> 00:15:59,835 Oh, then at least let this be easy. 221 00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:02,878 This is not going to be easy. 222 00:16:03,120 --> 00:16:06,192 It seems the guy who built it went insane. 223 00:16:06,440 --> 00:16:07,668 How insane? 224 00:16:07,920 --> 00:16:11,037 Well, he spackled in his naval. 225 00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:14,750 He built a shrine to Larry of the Three Stooges... 226 00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:17,673 ...and he moved deep into the woods. 227 00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:20,794 How deep into the woods? 228 00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:44,150 Hi. Are you Mary? 229 00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:46,914 My name is "Ma-ray." "Ma-ray." 230 00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:49,358 Oh, sorry. 231 00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:54,390 - How do you spell "Ma-ray?" - M-A-R-Y. 232 00:17:00,680 --> 00:17:05,834 - Well, then how do you spell Mary? - M-A-R-Y. 233 00:17:09,480 --> 00:17:14,600 So are you busy or "bus-ay"? 234 00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:17,393 Depends. 235 00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:19,995 Are you from the escort service I called in '79? 236 00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:23,479 No. I'm here to see a man about a couch. 237 00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:24,994 Well, come on in. 238 00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:28,118 But if the escort babe shows up you're gonna have to leave. 239 00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:31,597 Besides, I don't know where you got the idea that I have a couch. 240 00:17:35,480 --> 00:17:37,198 You want a couch, you go to a mall. 241 00:17:37,440 --> 00:17:39,351 You want a chair, you go to a mall. 242 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:42,319 You want to see teenage girls ride up and down escalators... 243 00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:45,114 ...with very short skirts, you go to a mall... 244 00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:50,440 ...but you wanna eat fried squirrel off a dirt floor, you come here. 245 00:17:50,760 --> 00:17:53,274 - Can I get you anything? - Cappuccino? 246 00:17:53,520 --> 00:17:54,748 - Decaf? - Please. 247 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,718 Coming right up. 248 00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,638 What kind of couch you looking for? 249 00:18:02,840 --> 00:18:07,152 Well, one with sturdy legs, you know, that you could fall asleep on. 250 00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:09,789 That's what I ordered from the escort service. 251 00:18:10,040 --> 00:18:11,553 Sit down. 252 00:18:12,640 --> 00:18:14,358 Not there. 253 00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:17,715 Not there. 254 00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:20,276 - Then where? - Right here. 255 00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:24,308 This is my bed. Sorry it's not made. I wasn't expecting company. 256 00:18:30,360 --> 00:18:32,078 Thank you. 257 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:42,592 - Now, let's talk couches. - Oh, great. 258 00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:44,952 Here's the one that we're looking for. 259 00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:47,077 They say that you're the man who made it. 260 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,997 No. Not this one. I was desperate. 261 00:18:51,240 --> 00:18:54,312 My mother was sick. We needed the money. 262 00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:57,595 Who are you to judge me? 263 00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:00,195 No, you don't understand. We like the couch. 264 00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:03,557 Yeah, so do I. This is from my "furniture for white trash" line. 265 00:19:03,800 --> 00:19:07,679 The "drunken hillbilly" collection. My one attempt at commercialism. 266 00:19:07,920 --> 00:19:10,150 God, I hate America. 267 00:19:10,880 --> 00:19:13,474 Not the country. The rock group. 268 00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,468 - Say, look, Mary-- - "Ma-ray!" 269 00:19:19,800 --> 00:19:23,349 Mary, "Ma-ray," madman... 270 00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:28,431 It's getting late and I'm kind of caught short here without a silver bullet... 271 00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:31,515 ...so can you help me replace the couch or not? 272 00:19:31,760 --> 00:19:35,355 Well, I am sorry, but I no longer build couches. 273 00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:38,956 Now I just visualize world peace and occasionally re-enact... 274 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:40,713 ...The Unsinkable Molly Brown. 275 00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:43,874 However, I am willing to part... 276 00:19:44,120 --> 00:19:49,353 ...with what is under this giant spreading fungus over here. 277 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:56,796 It's perfect. It's perfect. 278 00:19:57,040 --> 00:20:00,396 - Even down to the stains. - Made them myself. 279 00:20:01,720 --> 00:20:05,076 - How much? - Don't insult me with money. 280 00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:08,198 Well, how can I insult you? 281 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:14,911 With something I've been needing and wanting for a very, very long time. 282 00:20:15,200 --> 00:20:19,557 And you're just the person who can give it to me. 283 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,998 I can't believe what you did to get this couch. 284 00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:32,194 Well, he really wanted it, Bud. 285 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,594 I mean, it's been years. 286 00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:41,557 We're home. And I missed you so much. 287 00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:44,314 Oh, we missed you too, Mom. 288 00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:53,833 It really is okay. 289 00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:58,153 You know, this is the first time my bottom has ever lied to me. 290 00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:09,200 - So how were the Olympics, Dad? - Oh, fine, fine. 291 00:21:09,440 --> 00:21:13,353 You guys ever have a carrot peeler run up and down your arms really fast? 292 00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:17,078 Of course you have. What the heck, who hasn't? 293 00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:18,799 Well, I guess I'll go to bed. 294 00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:22,032 I haven't had a good night's sleep since... 295 00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:24,077 Well, since I got married. 296 00:21:24,320 --> 00:21:26,754 Yeah, you know, I'm really tired too. 297 00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:30,117 Oh, come on Peg, I already got skinned once today. 298 00:21:30,360 --> 00:21:32,112 Oh, Al, don't flatter yourself. 299 00:21:32,360 --> 00:21:34,749 Not everything you do turns me on. 300 00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:38,390 Oh, baby. The way you open your mouth. 301 00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:40,318 No, Peg. 302 00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:47,315 Kel, looks like you're gonna get away with it. 303 00:21:47,560 --> 00:21:50,711 Though they're gonna find out what you did to get this couch. 304 00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:54,278 Well, God knows I didn't wanna do it... 305 00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:56,313 ...but in today's world... 306 00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:59,273 ...you gotta give something to get something. 24343

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