All language subtitles for Hard to Be a God 2013 720p BluRay x264-NODLABS

Sever Studio
with Russia 1 TV Channel

Producers: R. Nasibulin, V. Izvekov
Production Manager: M. Dovladbegyan

This is not Earth. It's another planet...

identical, about 800 years behind.

There were a few similar planets.
This one was smaller and closer.

And local Gray castles were reminiscent
of early Renaissance.

So about 30 scientists were sent here.

But "Renaissance" didn't happen here.

Just a reaction to something
that almost didn't happen.

In the city of Arkanar,
the capital of Oltregolfo,

it started with destroying the university

of the way of thinking.
And a hunt for thinkers - wise guys -

Based on Hard to Be a God,
a novel by Arkady and Boris Strugatsky

bookworms
and talented artisans.

Some fled to the neighboring Irukan.
It was better there.

Others broke down or were executed.

By the squads of Don Reba,
the Crown Security Minister.

Squad members -
drovers and shopkeepers — wore gray.

Gray troops, gray minister,

the color of the local stone,
of the worst quality.

The royal guard was pushed aside.

Nothing hit, or pinched, even!

Screenplay by
S. Karmalita, A. German

Poverty, poverty.

Director:
A. Yu. German

Enough, enough, enough.

The stones were white and flat.

Cinematography by
V. Ilyin, Yu. Klimenko

Fika, the redheaded butcher, where is he?

Production design by S. Kokovkin,
G. Kropachev, E. Zhukova

Rains here were short and sticky.
But the fogs were long.

They came from the gulf
and returned there.

HARD TO BE A GOD

He often cried in his sleep.

Because he killed, in his sleep.

He wasn't allowed to kill, ever.

Then he heard his grandma's voice.
From his childhood on Earth.

"The child is crying."

She smoked a cigarette and said,

"Children's tears are water.
It's all in your head, boy!"

The Noble Don Rumata -
Leonid Yarmolnik

He felt smoke on his forehead,
but it was only the draft from a crack,

where he had ordered
to place a large chest.

He grasped the bed sheet tightly,
only to wake up.

A chimney smoked downstairs
in his huge castle.

The slaves spoke loudly,
though it was forbidden.

He was not on Earth,
but on a different planet.

Here he was
a 17th-generation noble don.

An illegitimate son of Goran,
a local pagan god.

Born from the god's mouth.

Not everyone believed this.

But everyone was on guard.

Did you feed the turtle, idiot?

Mice lick off the lard.

They do.

Are you wearing my boots again?

It happened.

It always happens to you.

Costumes by Ye. Shapkaitz
Makeup by O. Izvekova, N. Ratkevich

The boots on the table.

Music by V. Lebedev
Sound by N. Astakhov

I'll hang myself.

What?

I'll hang myself.

What?

Why are you so loud when I'm sleeping?
I'd sell you all at the port. You too.

It's a pity slaves have fallen in price.

That's the way it is.

Die, you monster!

You die!

It's autumn, there are no mice.

Special thanks to A. German Jr.

My whole life —

A goose drowned here.

A painting!

It's a bit shallow.
Let's go headfirst.

Piga, did you get the egg?

The bees are killing
their queen.

He bites like a ferret.

Found this under the pig.

The letters are so even.

Let's go.

Now, now.

You, stinker, remember 40 years ago?

Yes, like that, like that.

You called my book
the poop of the Siu bird.

- I don't remember.
- Don't you?

Hey, what are you doing?

Forty years of life. My whole life.

It's OK, you made it in time!

Now you're going for a walk?

Let go, Saanez!
The tube is ours.

They stuck a wise guy
into the shit-house down there.

His feet did this,
then he went "glub-glub."

I was there, such a laugh!

Return the flute to the Don.

You bastard!

You have to be careful with money.

Bring it to him yourself, prankster,
or else I'll sell you at the port.

Don.

You thief!

It's the same every fall.

Don't know what to say.

It's the same.

Noble Don,
give the cripple a coin!

The wind has changed,
now it smells like rot.

The city was surrounded
by fetid bottomless Pitanian swamps.

Still, people,
like the drowned bookworm,

crept to Irukan at nights.

There were Arata,
the Hunchback's rebel peasants

or the refugee slaves from the tin mines,
transparent like moths,

or Colonel Kusis's Gray soldiers.

You pay or you die.

All because they used
to create a second nature

to decorate the life of people
who know no beauty.

Or to create glass
that helped the half-blind to see

and the ones who saw
to approach the sky.

Don Rumata hid clover clogs here

to sneak into Arkanar.

What are you doing?

We're learning to fly, mostly downward.

Noble Don, take me from here.

What a delight!

Budakh the Doctor was to be
brought here from Irukan.

He was a sober and logical mind
created by this civilization.

A good interlocutor for Rumata
in the long evenings at Arkanar.

But Budakh disappeared
together with the guards.

Here's Pekh, the iron-tailed beast.

You're lying. There's no such thing.

It's turnip.

Turnip.

Exhale!

He is lying!

You even got the birds drunk!

Now I'll kill him!

Hit!

Hit him!

Bastard. Kill him!

If you ever brew that slop again.

Why is it so depressing?

- Because it's fall.
- Yeah.

Fall again?

It is white.

Unbearable!

Look!

Can you believe
that idiot synthesized alcohol?

That toad! The first on this planet!

Leonardo da Vinci.

Earthlings gathered here
more rarely now.

They drank more and more
and got mad at each other.

I love you...

but you don't love me.

The hell with all those presidents, kings,

get out of the way!

I adopted a boy.

He's alone, I'm alone.

The boy is a thief.

He's an orphan, bastard!
Now there's two of us.

I saw Earth again in my sleep.
It's wonderful.

Welcome here!

Your guy Budakh disappeared.
And the officer too. They will kill him.

I'll get Budakh.

Give me this shovel.

The boy volunteered to snitch.
On his own.

Tell him to shut up. Clear?

Like this.

Hey, you old fart!
Give me a kiss!

You've got ants in your mouth.
Here, eat that!

A trap, I said.

How many times have I told you!

Pashka got caught in a trap!

A boar trap!

Don't set your foot —

In order to remove this trap
it's necessary to cut the leg also!

Give me a knife.

It hurts, you jerks!

You want some poison? A fine one!

Listen, all! Twenty years ago —

Twenty years ago one of us...

an idiot,

called "Renaissance"
the triumph of art here!

On this shitty planet!

I laughed.

And you wrote that I'm an ass.
Maybe I am.

But where's the art?
And the Renaissance? Not here.

- And the whole life, eh?
- My mistake.

Sorry, my bad.

Listen, everyone.
I came here without guards.

I was attacked by a runaway slave.

He choked me, see.

That's just a zit.

I have to go back alone.

An arrow in the eye will kill me!

And you don't want to forgive me
before my death!

He doesn't want to forgive me
before my death!

Come on, let's kiss!

This scumbag has
a whole crew of guards.

- What a liar!
- I'm Munchhausen.

What would you do without me?
Strange fools on a strange planet?

Where is the leather bag?

The bird Siu cries over there.

Your fucking Renaissance is the most
vile age in the history of the Earth!

Zurab, that's better.

"It's dark and quiet.

Not to me, to someone else."

Well?

"Not to me, to someone else.

A wet umbrella rustled in."

- Do you want it?
- Get lost!

Look.

Are you crazy?

You creep!

You creep!

The Siu bird, never seen, steals silver.

And the servants get punished.
Is that fair?

That bird doesn't exist, you fool!

Muga saw its shadow!

What are you saying?

Nobody saw it but Muga.

Wonderful, only there's no happiness yet.

Slave, like this or this?

The rope noise scares the birds...

and they fly to the swamp.

If you put scales on the head...

they peck the eyes out.

One tobacconist,
a very smart man, he —

Slave,

like this or this?

Master, I'm not going any further.

It's too hard.

You'll keep going, or I'll flog you.

Master, you're kind,
'cause you're a god.

I will surely flog you,

you'll think it's a nightmare.

When I die, don't throw me into the gulf.

Bury me in the ground.

Even if it's in the barn!

This Don Arata the Hunchback
is just a clot of swamp fog.

I was always sure.

They took the relics
of your holy father out.

Arata and all his drunk peasants
melted too.

- So, am I a bad poet?
- An awful one!

"Falls on my soul like an autumn leaf."
"Prince and Barbarian girl."

- I have the book.
- I burned it.

How stupid of you!

Give it to me.

The archer is drunk, remove him!

And the monk tells you —

We're the young aristocracy.

They did the right thing by drowning Bota
in the crap-house for such poetry. Not me!

You think his poetry's bad?

Did the prince cry today?

- My good crossbowman!
- Insolent slave!

Budakh didn't go through my office.

Colonel Kusis left the army.

He and Don Reba are
in the lilac chambers.

Speaking that lousy language.

Incredible!

Show him the holy relics of my father.
Maybe he'll disappear.

No one disappears,
neither Arata, nor that one.

- I thought it interested you.
- It interests me a lot.

He's the captain of the crown guard.

He has blood on his hands.
On his whole body!

It has always been like this
and like this it will be.

That's the rule.

And so it goes.

Noble Don...

my whole body stinks.

Will I die?

Of course you will die.

Charming.

Fear of death is a heresy, Captain.

Here.

Bota the Great also stunk

because he was so drunk,
he peed on himself.

- The savages also stunk.
- What are you doing?

Do you seriously think
you're a son of God?

"The murmurs ebb;
onto the stage I enter.

I am trying, standing in the door."

- You're Red!
- "The murmurs ebb...

onto the stage I enter.

I am trying, standing in the door,
to discover in the distant echoes —

The nocturnal darkness
with a thousand —"

Who wrote that?

I did!

"Nocturnal darkness" is an evening.
I can teach you something. For money.

Crown Security Minister, Don Reba!

- Allow me?
- Away, away.

Don Reba, our eagle. Crown security.

He delivered ice for my dad. Barefoot.

Rumata, whose son are you?

Let me have a sip.

Ask your dad not to turn my wine sour.

Damned bastard!

Your Majesty.

You haven't eaten?

Who are you? A butcher?

Orders of Don Reba. It's you?

I'm a colonel, a financier.

They've stuffed the castle with Gray thugs.
Where's Arata the Hunchback?

He's become a mirage?

So great and glorious like eternity,
the king whose name —

Out!

All on the ground!

I hit the nostril.

Redhead!

- Now I'll hang myself.
- No way.

Do you smell the stink!

Don Reba.
You should stop by for a wash.

I have these comfortable
huge iron barrels.

No, you come over!

I have great barrels in the Tower of Joy.
On coals, with lids.

Without water.

Perfect barrels for the torture!
Rumata!

You really are a redhead.

Reba, you've been promising
to strangle him.

You're a liar,
and not good at anything.

- He has royal blood.
- You should have known that!

What is it?

He's good at everything.
He's strangled half of your subjects.

I summoned this doctor, Budakh.

For my knee pain.
What'd he do with him?

You have knee pain too?

What?

It says here.
Knight Don Reba, our eagle.

They sell it all over at Arkanar.

- You are a knight?
- Yeah.

- What are you saying?
- Whatever they say. I don't know.

Show me your boot.

The spur. Take it off!

- Where's your doctor?
- The knight has him!

Not in a barrel, I hope.

Bring him here.

He'll answer without inquest.
You'll have a laugh!

Bloodsuckers fall from the ceiling.

And she's slippery. Keeps slipping off.
No good.

- Try a barbarian girl.
- No way! She'll bite it off.

It happened to one,
before he had a big one.

Here, it's a gift. You'll tell me later.

Here's Budakh.

Here's Budakh.
You always find something wrong.

And he won't be Budakh.
I'm not good at anything!

It wasn't Budakh.
It was a quack from a plague port.

You're not Budakh. And not a doctor!

He has your letter too. Don Rumata.

You signed it.

Why drink? Everyone rubs.

Why drink, Rumata?

You drink!

Out!

He should be strangled.

Redhead, you said?

Remember, tonight you're on watch
by the Prince's chambers.

The crossbow's broken.
How do I go on now?

Play what I taught you.

The donkeys lift their tails. Autumn.

A wagon with wood and with fish.

The dog sprouted.

It keeps raining.

Don, buy it, for the sword.

- Right.
- What?

There. Hold it like that.

Have your donkey fuck you!

Have your donkey fuck you!

It makes you laugh?

Go on, sing!

Stand back, everyone.

I'll chop you all up!

Desperate?

Hello.

Like a swan's!

Damn!

Your woman's over there.

The Grays live here now!

Brave guys.

What a dog!

As a sign of peace!

No jokes in the face of holiness.

Where're the monks coming from?
What's in the bags?

Take a bite.

You'll know suffering, Muga.

Stop yelling! I'll flog you at home!

This is the third family leaving.

What will you take for the journey?

I'll strangle you.

It's all mine!

No peeing in the carriage!

They keep peeing in the carriage.

Who thought of it?

I hear there's going to be a massacre
tonight. They'll kill the wise guys.

They left the old man behind.

A very smart man,

a tobacconist from Tobacco Street.
A very smart man.

Swine, take the chickens,
if not, that one will steal and eat them.

Master! Master!

Water. Saint Mika drowned in water.

A tobacconist from Tobacco Street.
A very smart man said —

- What is it?
- Want to end up in the cholera pit?

Who did I tell about germs?
I'll show you.

Can't wash sins away with water.
I prayed three times last night.

I'll drown you in the barrel, you stinker.

Get back!

Give me some water.

Muga, the fish has a crush on you!

A double lunch? Here it is!

So the tobacconist from Tobacco Street
is a very wise man. He said it.

Well.

Did anyone else see it?

- Everyone saw it.
- It's his fault.

- You knocked and I opened.
- It's like that!

Master, sell it!

- The Gray guys are coming this way.
- Excellent!

Go on and wash yourselves. Everyone!

And no laughing!

- A turtle.
- Yes.

Nonsense. Why?

What do you mean, why?

Yeah, it's like that.

I didn't invite him.

- Sit down.
- It's raining outside.

No, don't sit down.

Everything's wet, it's raining.

What's wrong?
Sit down.

Take my ear.

Squeeze it hard.

Harder! Harder!

If it hurts, I won't think and I'll tell you.

Brother came
from the barracks yesterday.

Started yelling that I have red hair.

He lifted my dress.

He showed soldiers

what it's like down there.

He yelled that my mom is a redhead

and he'll send me
to the Tower of Joy.

Brother is a commander
of a pack of Grays.

No, it bothers me!

Did they touch you?

No, he wanted to do
something like in your drawing, but no.

He was too drunk!

They brought in a wise guy at night.

And kept beating him. He screamed.
Dad and I cried in the barn.

And now —

- Her bag was like this. And now it's this!
- Go away, you stinker!

I see, but it feels like I can't see.

Why are you wearing my boots?

They'll sell you at the port.

Stop!

Bend over!

Don't beat me! Ah, you slashed me!

- I'm dying.
- Here's a coin for you.

Who's beating you?
I've never laid a finger on them.

I've never laid a finger on them.

- And I will do it.
- I never even touched you, moron!

Hear how he's screaming?
I never touched him and he's screaming!

- He's a cunning idiot.
- Look at him.

What do you want?

- Take it.
- What?

It stinks.

The eye... I've cried.

The soldiers did it to me.

Fuck you!

- Who stuck this in here? Why?
- OK, I'm going.

Where're you going?

I've stolen enough.

If you leave —

If you leave —

If you leave, my friend —

Don Reba —

I'll be all alone.

Not counting you, pretty boy.

Because here I am the strongest,

I can crush anyone.

I never told you about the fangs?

If I could only give them to you!

No one would ever hurt you again.

You would have devoured anyone!

What an idiot!

Here it is... the flap.

I was afraid you didn't have one,
like St. Goran.

Silence!

I'll have Goran's grandson in my belly,
that will be my fangs!

The key is mother's, not mine!

Here, please!

Goran fell!
It's my mother's Goran!

- What?
- We're almost there.

- You're lying!
- What? You think it's funny?

Yes! A game!

What? Where's the bolt?

Your grace, someone saw
a dude with gills in the creek.

What's that?

Well?

- You see?
- No, I don't see.

But you look —

Baron? What's wrong?

I don't drink. I only sniff now.

Baron, are you ill or mad at me?

I'm depressed.

The Grays are like bedbugs.

Baron. What's that?

St. Gaj's toilet.

I've invited the neighbors,
they really got drunk.

Come here, my friend.

No, Baron. I'm a foreigner.
I can't do that.

Here's a young one. Come here, you!

The neighbors came. They piss
everywhere. They mutilate the dogs.

They say that
you broke Soan's armor in two.

Just rumors. Don't believe it, Baron.

- Enough. I'm so depressed.
- Shall I take you home?

The Soanians are tiny
and their armor is fragile.

It's all about sharpening the sword.
I'll teach you.

I'm the Empire's best swordsman,

you're better than me.

You never kill anyone.

Where do I get a Soanian sword?

They've brought the Baroness's
grandfather's armor. It's huge.

I tried everything to break it.

Even a two-handed sword.
No luck!

Then the Baroness saw me.

Then —

Then she really let me have it!

It's all in the grinding.

I'll show you.

It's easy. Just find the middle, OK.

You swing from your wrist.
I'll push from the shoulder.

Nothing else.

Like this.

- Take it and lower it and that's it!
- Baroness —

She thinks I'll rot in the water here.

You won't rot.

Wow, look at this!

Nice and heavy, eh?

It was the wind.

That's funny!

These tablecloths are clean.
You can vomit on them.

Can you fight with this?

Everything will be all right.

Baron, I beg you. Let's do it together.

Hold the wrist tightly
and put weight on the shoulder.

Noble Dons, this is a very expensive
armchair. It's also Grandfather's!

Now it's clean. Yes, in two!

Hold it!

He won't make it.

No way!

- First it seemed like —
- Yes?

Get out of here.

Sorry, my friend. It's just my job!

The Baroness can't see this.

You'll crush me, Baron.

What is it?

That's all, that's all.

Pah, the Gray thugs.
They're everywhere, like fleas.

The milk!

The port's closed.
There's meat rotting in the galleys.

I have a secret for you.

That doctor, in the king's castle.
He's not Budakh.

He's actually needed
at the cholera pit at the port.

And where's Budakh?

Fish like milk.

No, Noble Don, fish don't like milk.

- Fish like milk.
- I'm telling you, fish don't like milk.

- Fish like milk.
- No.

Let's just agree that fish like milk.

I'm the captain of crown guard.

It doesn't matter what your Baron,
that beer gut, says.

I have a troop of haberdashers for him!

Yeah, you'll always have
the haberdashers from the colonies.

Until the end of time!

Fish like milk.

Fish like milk.

Fish like milk.

They like milk!

Wait. Wait.

Where's Fika, the redheaded butcher?

Go away, boy.

You're a god!

And if I was a god?

If I am,

then why is my name

on your arrest list?

You're a god, a real god!

Where's Fika, the redheaded butcher?

There's a soul, or there's no soul.

I've stolen some ham.
I said it was for you.

It's great. Listen:
"An impotent and inept one —"

"An impotent and inept one
will give up without knowing,

where the octopus's heart is
and if it has one."

- Are these bad lines?
- No, not bad!

What do you have that I don't?
They gave you a chef?

Go buy a barrel of wine.

Don't come near me.
Or you'll end up in the Tower of Joy,

and you'll die on the way out of fear!

Get out of the city!

- I'll go stay with my mother.
- Go away!

Baron!

I'm not going to let you pass!

Baron, Baron!

Everyone get out!

You've broken
the 3rd commandment! Quiet!

Which one?

"You mustn't fight with swords
in a tavern!"

But I —

Go home. Quick!

Good thing the Baroness
can't see me now!

Victory!

Write her. I can't.
She's all alone there.

Wine and whores for everyone!

I'll just have the old ones
and decent ones.

I'm distressed!

Write her so she can feel it all.

Arata!

A very strict officer.

Very strict.

Go back!
You can't pass through here.

He'll hit us.

He's a very strict officer.

It's cold.

Well —

Hey, you, a dog with spurs!
I'll rip your balls off!

Hey, are you crazy?

Wait!

I'm going to throw up.

The prince nibbles on her tits. Creepy.

Let me do it, eh?
And Rumata will purr.

"Because the flower has withered...

in the mysterious garden... pum pum."

His wife ran away
because of their "pum pum." Monster!

Why does my ass bleed?
Second day now!

A nobleman should be clean
and smell good!

I'll go back to sleep.

The mice, the mice.

And to smell good!

Smells of shit.

Also this one.

I swear!

Don Rumata of Estor! You're under arrest!
Hand over your sword!

Oh, yeah?

What?

Try not to fart.

Your swords!

Take whatever you want!

Don Rumata can cut in half
the Soanian armor!

- Cut!
- The swords!

Well, farmers —

Are you all here?

I know this one. He stole my fur coat.

Let's trade. You give me back the fur coat,
and I'll give you my swords.

Give me back my fur. Give it to me!

You can't fight like this.
You have to strike the chest!

Now, everyone look at the tip of the nose!

Hold this!

Well?

Down with the net!

- We've caught the lieutenant!
- You're stepping on my hands!

I'm a lieutenant of the guards!
Let me go! I'll punish all of you!

I'm a lieutenant, I'll punish you!

Where are the swords?

If you set him free, he'll kill us all.

You toothless jerk.

I'll cut your balls off!

You fat ass, come on,
drag us somewhere!

What, Don,
you're not having fun anymore?

I understand why you
pissed on yourself, Lieutenant.

Bastard.

I'm a lieutenant of the royal guards!

The net's accidental —

Again!

Here's Don Rumata.
Our old and staunch enemy.

Smells like shit!

Ah, the poisoner of the king!

Hang him, what else?

You're an idiot, Kusis.
And a walking dead man!

What an interesting thought.

Meanwhile —

That's it, my lords!

Right.

Come on, I'm Colonel Kusis!

Good.

Take the seal!

Look at Kusis!

Now that's really it, my lords!
The hat of sorrow.

You know what's bad?
Not that you're a lieutenant —

- Please, don't!
- But that you're Gray!

But it doesn't hurt. It doesn't.

Don Rumata, what are you doing?

What?

Give me your hand.

Soldiers!

Go away!

Enough, enough.

Noble friend!

It stinks.

Noble Don Rumata.

Maybe not a don?

My trophy.

And not noble?

Old man, you're out of your mind!

Straight from Irukan.

- Who's that?
- That's you!

That's you! Actually, the last Rumata
of Estor died of a bad disease.

He was 85.

We've had you for 20 years.

- The grandson is a redhead!
- He is allowed.

Now —

That's mine too.

All your papers.

Rumata, you're 105!

- 105?
- He is 105!

Really? 40, and carry over 5.
It doesn't work.

Hey, knight, come here!

What difference does it make,
plus or minus a legend?

Nothing at all!

Never! Not in the new state!

Why is there crap on the floor?
The cleaners need a flogging.

And that duck!

Don Rumata,
the Empire's best swordsman.

186 duels and not one dead body.
Only ears.

A total of 372 ears.

Hello!

Hello.

Ears really hurt, you should believe me!

Go fuck yourself!

Come here.

If you swing the sword from the right —
The hair's in the way.

And it's because it's the right hand.

Let me go. That's horrible.

I know where
you got your combat technique!

The finger, it's better to lift it.

Inhuman technique!

You're a fool.

Show me your ears.

You're scared.

I'm not scared of anyone.

You're scared.

Help here!

Humble children
of the order landed last night

at the Arkanar port.
30,000 of them!

No more conceited Grays.

Arata the Hunchback's men
are hung by the tracts!

Allow me to introduce myself:

I'm the vicar of the order. Combat master
of Lands Beyond the Strait.

Of the islands, etc.

Great.

- What?
- The master's boot.

You were on the edge
of such a fiery abyss.

You don't even know. See?

Look.

- Come on, that's a boot.
- Does it stink?

Such a trifle. You understand.

A man comes to you every night.
For 7 years now!

That's a lie!

You even called for a witch doctor.
But you can't get rid of him!

You wrapped your head
in a piece of hide.

But that's heresy!

When man opens his eyes...
and looks at you. Right?

Nonsense.

He opens his eyes.

And he says —

Sir, you mustn't!

And you scream so loud
that your old lady pees herself!

That's right?

Come here.

Her pants!

That man...

with the eyes...

that's me!

That's me!

Go away.

A larger pan.

Boots. The spur's bent.

Maybe the abyss belched you out.
Maybe you're God's son.

I'm having trouble too.

There's a mouse.

- What?
- There is a mouse.

That's great.

I can't anymore!

My head will explode.

Go away!

I'm lapsing into heresy.

The mouse is wet...

and scared too.

I'm a broad-minded man. I could.

Then why don't you!

Do it!

But learn to jump out of my way first.

I said, get out of here.

That's right.

Give it to me.

A nice, big enema.

A big one, Don Reba.

Sorry.

Highest decoration of the order.
For you.

That's all I can do.
And take your Budakh.

You go too.

- Me?
- Sure.

Yes.

Three hundred kilos of shit!

Yes. So I can sleep well.

Can you explain
why you need these people?

They're useless and bad for any state.

The bookworms?

See, I'm speaking to you.

But that doesn't mean
we're having a conversation.

Why did you serve such rotten food?

Go away!

Your belongings, Don.

Any food is good, even fish.

That was the order.

Its humble children.

200 or so years ago the order
owned the Lands Beyond the Strait.

Luckily, a plague sucked the order dry.

It was now rotting away in the south.

But then it got better. It was here now.
Ruthless like Brazilian ants.

Rumata thought about sending
at least Muga there.

But didn't get around to it.

You have so much stuff!

You have so much stuff.

Have some milk, Don.

Gur, you were the brightest.

Move away!

Waga!

The wheel's gone.

What are you saying?

What the hell!

Are you out of your mind?

Perfect... yes, yes.

"Like autumn leaves —"

Your autumn leaves clutter the scaffold.

Yes, the boots,
the spur is bent.

Peck the eyes out or no,

what does it matter?

Eh, doesn't matter
if it gets pecked out.

Nice place.
You want me to hang the poet over here?

Don!

I recognized you right away.

Branded by the monks.
I belong to you now!

Don't be mad, Don.
Have the potato.

You've heard
how many ears I've cut off?

- Yes, we've heard.
- It hurts.

Give me that umbrella.

Ear, ear!

It's funny!

A right ear.

An adult man, eh!

I'm going to dry myself
and then I'll give it back.

Let me go.

That's wrong. Don't do that.

Yes.

Close it.

He's been on the chain
since he was 3.

Why?

You let him go - he'll die.

Here!

Why I'll be —

Stop! I said, stop!

Say you fell.
That you weren't born with that lip.

Remember that.

Don't hide anything.

Blame the redheads.

Don't argue with anyone.

Listen to me!

You think you're the only one.

Learn this!
A scholar is not the enemy.

The enemy is a scholar in doubt.

Remember!

In the name of the order!

In its name!

You'll kill him, Don.

In the name of the order.

What is it?

All the ribs.

Let the Noble Dons in.

We're killing whores.

She'll spread her legs,
and this thing is on a spring.

Rips them to pieces!

She didn't have time to cough.

The order!

How much did she pee!

With spurs.

Noble Don!

Where did you get your hands?

Waga will be released?

What a delight,

what a delight for everyone.

Wipe off my temple.

What's going on here?

Get out!

A thought entered his head
and settled there for good.

Don Reba must be killed!

Just kill him and not think
about the consequences.

What's going on here?

We're flogged here, Rumata!

Where's your sword?
Did you hand it in, Noble Don?

I see.

I have this shrub. It blossomed.

So beautiful! It's a sign!

When I was little, Don Reba gave me
rides on a shovel, in the winter.

See how easy it is to breathe
in the new, free Arkanar.

And wine's cheaper now too!

- Leave me alone.
- Eat this.

They put salt on the flogging rods.

And what?
Why? What's the salt for?

Is it better now,
in the new liberated Arkanar?

I've lost the notice.
If only I hadn't lost it!

Here. Stick it up your ass.

Your ass, not this one!

Try to make sure the hangman sees it.

- Stop, I said.
- Forever, Rumata.

Take off your hat.

The Keu barons always had privileges!

There are no privileges for the order.

7 heavy rod whips!

- Why heavy ones?
- For thoughts without enthusiasm.

Give me Budakh.

It'll do it. Here's your doctor.

Good.
You remember about the ears, right?

Oh, yeah.

Leave it to me!

Everyone steals it.

It's not necessary.

The Dons have funny asses.
Like toads!

Like your face!

It's good like this, right?

- Don, again —
- Go to hell!

- So good that I found you.
- Baron, but I found you!

Why are you so —

It hurts.

A courtier, Baron...

must be clean and fragrant. Right?

What's wrong?

What's wrong, Baron?

My nose burst.

I'm so glad I found you.

When you were arrested,
I fled here.

There were 1000 Blacks here.
I beat them until —

Then they threw a cow on me.
From the bridge.

- The leg, Baron.
- I'll push.

How their crummy skulls will crack
under our baronial swords!

Let's go, Barons.

Here. Budakh, not Rudakh.

Good and alive.
Eating for the road.

Looks OK,
and the teeth are intact.

Are you Budakh from Irukan?

Baron, this is Budakh.

He is —

- I turned him in.
- Why?

Baron!

First, because he has a dog's name.
Then —

Second... wait.

- What second, Baron?
- I did something wrong.

And this! Till the very end,
20 years. My whole life.

Now I come to eat.
The hell with you.

The hell with you.

Baron!

If I only had a nail file —

You'll crush me!

Bau bau.

Baron, the stuff is right there,
on the left.

Go be a soldier, son.

Don't look, Irukano!

Who let them flog him,
Baron or Noble Don?

Baron, your stuff!

- Fire from the sky!
- Stop farting!

Smelly!

Stop!

My noble friend, are my legs really skinny
and white now?

Nice, nice legs.

Why are you sniffing me?

- Trying to be a thinker?
- Here I am.

- The forehead is also beautiful.
- I'm such a baron, you know.

And you're a brainbox. He'll teach me
to read. Then I'll be wise too.

But you'll never be a baron.

If you get sick, they'll punish me.

Forgive me... bau bau.

My friend, give him money. Lots of it.

The ribs are still not healed.

They'll close the gates
and we're dead. We'll go back.

- They'll open it right back.
- Don't do this, I beg you!

But if you get sick —

Show me that lieutenant,
who is so worried about my health.

Go away!

Such a turkey.

Buy an eye.

It reflects light.

The knife was a gift.

Recently I saw your Waga.

- Help!
- Where are you going, asshole?

Where are the asshole archers?
Eating turnip?

There. Such fun again.

The sword, my friend.

Where are the archers?

I'll die laughing!

Hey, Baron,
you won't learn to read now.

I can't teach you.
I'll pee in my pants. No way now.

Baron Pampa del Bao-no of Arkanar.

He wasn't tried by the Big Royal Court

or killed by the poison of the bee,
or executed in a square.

He was just pierced
with a dozen arrows and dumped.

Rotten turnips were dumped
on top of him.

At night, paupers will rip everything

off his huge, strong white body.

- Leave me alone.
- Without the horse?

He's pulling the cord on purpose.

Where did we stop, Budakh?
It's impossible to talk like this.

Why without the horse?

I ask questions, you don't answer.

I asked you.

What would you do if you were God?

- I wouldn't have any urine problems.
- Go to hell!

Damn it, they won't let us talk.

Pee!

Pee all you need, and then we'll talk.

It's important not to stare.

Go there. Relax.

And if you could give advice to a god?
If he asked for it?

That wouldn't be heresy, right?

I'd say: Creator!

Why pee on my boots?

You came and we're leaving.

Someone killed two slaves over there.
It wasn't us.

We're officers of the order.

We're off to sleep.

You got it, brainbox.

That one is still —

Let him be.

I'd say,

"Creator! Give people everything
that separates them."

No! That won't do them any good.

Because the strong will take
from the weak.

It's empty.

I'd say, punish the cruel

so the strong will know
not to be cruel.

The strong and cruel
will be punished.

The stronger of the weak
will take their place.

You know that.

You're a fool, Budakh.

Get out of here. I don't need you.

Why do you get angry with me?

Get out of here!

I'm going to spray...

this acid on you,

so you won't have a face!

I'd say,

"Creator,

if you exist, blow us away.

Blow us away. Like dust or pus.

Or leave us in our rot.
Destroy us all."

Here.

It's easy to destroy.

The Blacks, the lice-ridden,
and even the children.

My heart is full of pity.

I can't do that.

OK.

Let's go home.

There were many Grays.

The slave was wearing your shirt.
He shot from the stairs.

Your shirt was big on him.

The Grays put a noose
around his neck and strangled him.

And then the Blacks came
and killed the Grays.

One Black gave me this.
See, don't touch it.

- Why?
- Don't touch! Don't touch!

See that? They told me to come
to the Tower of Joy tomorrow.

- Why did you take it?
- They gave me this.

So I'd come tomorrow.

Tomorrow.

- Give it to me!
- Give it back. Don't touch!

He ruined the cucumbers.
He was hiding...

in the cucumber barrel, in the brine.

Parasite!

He peed on himself.

Master!

I had a horse.

- There's just this clamp left.
- Throw it away.

Everyone, get out.
I'm going to wash my ass.

I'm going to put it here for a while.

I'm distressed!

Weren't you hanged?

- How could I come if I were?
- How did you come, Arata?

Arata the Hunchback! My back.

- Goran likes cripples.
- Are you a cripple?

First my guys trusted this virgin.

- Give me.
- This old bitch!

- He is the don of peasants!
- He is more important!

Sausage —

And then they trusted monks.

They now hang them by the balls
on the same trees.

I almost forgot you're a god!

That's too bad.

Your water is cold.

Make some hotter water!

Once I was being hanged on the port.

I jumped off just in time

and ran away.

One of them was...

- a captain.
- Yes?

He was kind.

Angel! Come here!

Don't stare.

Let it be.

One's too much for you.

- I knew a while back that God died!
- Come on, really?

He pulled this load, like a horse.

Then he got snotty...

and died.

There's no other way!

It's hard for a god.

It's hard.

I saw you getting snotty today.

Wasps!

It's a joke.

I have bad news for you.

Today you'll give us the fiery chariot
and these shirts.

And in the morning you'll lead us!

- Or else —
- What?

Or else...

the navel on your white belly
will be the right place to drill!

My navel.

All right.

- I'm afraid it won't be easy.
- It will be easy.

That was a bird.

That's an omen. For money.

- You'll fly to your daddy.
- Everyone will fly one day. Like birds.

Get out.

Will we have enough water?

Somebody, hold my wallet.

Not much you can do, brother.

Leave the ring.

Give it to me.

Not this.

I wouldn't kill you.

You don't know that!

You're so dressed up.

- How was the trip here?
- OK.

I won't get you the throne.

That is the truth.

That was right.

I'd burn the gold and black vermin.

As far as 12 generations back.

That you're good at!

That you're good at!

And you'd give the land out
to your own.

- Right?
- Yes.

Who's come?

A scholar.
I know him. He's an idiot.

- Pour again!
- It happens.

Pour, pour.

What is it?

A man's skin is made up of tiny holes.

They breathe too.

If you cover a man with tar, he will die.

That's for you.

Good boy, Arata!

Without it, they won't let you
out of the city.

Tell me —

Tell me, Arata!

So you give the land to your men.

Who needs the land without slaves?

Who needs it without slaves?

There'll be new slaves.

New scaffolds.

New Blacks.

Everything will begin from scratch.

There'll be a new Arata.

And God can't do anything.

That's sad!

I'll never allow it to happen!

Quiet now.

You won't be able to do anything.

You'd allow everything,

everyone did and always will.

For thousands of years.

What do we do?

The same as always.

The same as always.

One, two...

the end.

You're a redheaded bastard.

Muga!

Introduce him to your tobacconist!

They'll make good friends!

Chase him with sticks
through the barnyard.

Hey, Don!

All right.

OK. So what'll happen to me?

You'll remain in songs.

That's it?

That's not really that little.

Believe me!

Out!

Master!

The Blacks are asking for the sign.

I knew it,

this is the end.

Let's cut some ears!

Stop shaking.

Let me eat.

My arm hurts.

Want some?

Go away, old man.

You'll go with me.

You'll confirm there's a boy in my belly.

Goran's grandson!

Already?

I won't go without pants.
And all my pants are wet now.

You'll go!

18 generations of noble ancestors.
Royal blood,

and no pants!

Give me dry pants and I'll go to war.

I don't want to be covered
with lard and burned. Like a chicken.

So don't go! Ferret!

All right!

I'll chase them into the gulf.
Up to their asses. I promise.

I'm sorry
you didn't know Baron Pampa.

Forget it!

You could at least clean the house!

- Did you find any?
- No.

Yes, here.

Silly girl!

The turtle was eating mice
in the pants.

I found some. And the turtle too.

- Laces.
- What?

Laces? What?

Did you find my swords, silly girl?

Blood is sticky.

OK. There.

God,

if you exist,

stop me!

Run!

God decided to start killing.

My swords!

Where are you going?

Stop Arima!

Look!

Arima.

My name is Arima.

My name is Arima.

That's no problem.

Then —

- I didn't bring everyone.
- They'll all be punished.

Some strange monk did!

I saw him. With a walleye.

Kill them all!

Look, or I'll flog you to death!
I'm the eye of the order.

It's a mistake.

It was some strange monk!

Is it blood?

It smells.

What?

The Creator gave us pain.

I went to university too.
I am Arima.

I'm the eye of the order.

The roads are slippery.

I'll kill everyone here.

You too, student!

Heresy!

- Heresy!
- Get out of here!

The boots!

What?

I didn't take anything!

I didn't take anything!

The hat of sorrow!

Nobody steals under the order.

I'll kill everyone!

God, stop me.

Like it's not me!

Not everyone's destined.
I can't either.

I feel nauseous. It's just... why.

Here, a gift for you. Have a look.

Summons to the office.
The Tower of Joy.

It's something serious.

- He's here too.
- What did I do?

- I never left the house. Confirm!
- Out!

Death and life.

Life. And life again.

I've been outside today.

Here. Your destiny.

Kiun from Tin Street.

Defamation of the order.
That's serious,

something about you too.

You can pardon them all, Don.

Why don't you give me,

stupid Don...

200 more street luvvies?

You'll find someone else to burn.

Isn't it the same for you?

Isn't that right, student?

You can't!

Stop!

Put the boards down.

Who wants water?

Above!

- Ribs!
- Broken.

Another chain.

Rock him!

So the shit drips off!

A student.

"An impotent and inept one will give up.

Will give up...

without knowing
where the monster's heart is,

if the monster even has one."

Don, I think I've gone blind!

An officer!

It squelches here.

It always squelched here.

But not like this!

You're so awkward!

Stop, or I'll wound you.

It's slippery.

Hi.

What might be... nothing might be.

You'll pee!

- Again!
- You'll pee!

An egg!

Flies.

Here!

This is Arata the Hunchback.

So, walleyed man! You bastard.

He's decomposed by now.

Why didn't you spare the young girl?

- He —
- The Head of Cows.

- His arrow is marked!
- This is the boar Yi mark!

- It's the boar!
- This is a cow, I tell you!

This is the boar Yi! It's the boar!

- Go away!
- Leave him, he's suffered enough.

This is the boar Yi!

Arata killed the girl!

The mark on the arrow is the same.

He wanted to draw Rumata out...

against the Blacks.

But drew him against himself!

Another egg.

I'll call him!

You, witch!

It's squelchy here!

You owe me a coin, Condor!

I saw it first!

Condor,
there's something shiny over there.

What?

I'm not flying to Earth with you.

No, nothing shiny.

I'm not!

Pashka! You'll be sorry
if you go behind my back!

Well.

See what I learned here?

If you say no, then no.

But, you know that?

Well, you old ass.

All this is not my work, it's yours.

- You fucking theorist.
- You're crap!

- Why are you here?
- The crap of the Siu bird.

You're set in a nuthouse on Earth.

- Or maybe in jail.
- And you are a thief!

Or maybe you even have a brain tumor!

- You are a thief!
- The crap of the Siu bird!

There are snakes there!

Here, take this!

He's a thief,
and you keep throwing gloves.

Pashka, we're dueling.
It's come to this!

A god can be tired too.

Practical like hell!

Get out of here!

I'm sleepy.

You write books,

but you have no thoughts.

Here's one.

Where Grays triumph —

Wait.

Where Grays triumph, Blacks always,
always come in the end.

There is no way. Remember!

And now leave.

Wait!

If you write about me...

and you'll probably have to,

write that —

That it's hard...

to be a god.

And I'll get some sleep.

God, spit on me,
so I won't ever be sick.

And spit in my hand too.
I'll take it to my brother.

Leave me alone! God!

Come on, a kid won't speak in vain.

He doesn't look at me.

- Come on, look at me!
- Stop hovering!

Look at me!

These university guys. They kept running
around the tower, screaming.

The fat one didn't want to fly.

Stronger than beer.

Don Leonardo and Don Fatso.

They killed each other.

Here.

Why?

You bastards!

That Don Leonardo.

They drank away the round glass
and the boards.

So what?

Muga,
what does your tobacconist say?

Where is he?

Left his house...
and never came back. It happens.

Will you find him?

I told you to take the stocks off.
Why don't you take them off?

I'll remove them immediately.

- Have you gone mad?
- I slipped.

I also left my house a long time ago...

like him,

and never came back.

Out of the way, Noble Don!

Or the wheel will get your boot.

Hey, you forgot the chair, fools!

Do you like this music?

I don't know.

It makes my tummy hurt.

Yes.

A special thanks for assistance
in creating this film

goes to Alexei Kudrin,
Mikhail Prokhorov

The cast: Rumata - Leonid Yarmolnik
Baron Pampa - Yury Tsurilo

Ari - Natalya Moteva
Don Reba - Alexander Chutko

Budakh - Yevgeny Gerchakov
Gur - Pyotr Merkuryev

Muga - Ramiz Ibragimov
The King - Sergey Stupnikov

Zurab - Zurab Kipshidze
Arata - Valentin Golubenko

Arima - Leonid Timtzunik
Ripat - Valery Boltyshev

Don Tameo - Yury Nifontov

Narrating Voice - Vladimir Yumatov

Screenplay: Svetlana Karmalita
Alexey German

Direction: Alexey Yurievich German

Directors of Photography:
Vladimir Ilyin - Yury Klimenko

Set Designers: Sergey Kokovkin
Georgy Kropachev - Yelena Zhukova

Composer: Victor Lebedev

Sound Director: Nikolay Astakhov

Costumer Designer: Ekaterina Shapkaitz

Makeup: Olga lzvekova
Natalia Ratkevich

Editors: Irina Gorokhovskaya
Maria Amosova

Supervisors: Yevgeny Pritzker

Production Director: Yury Feting

Assistant Directors: Felix Eskin
Olga Bagirova - Oleg Yudin

Further Assistant Directors:
Yu. Olenikov - Yu. Filipov

E. Krupima - D. Korel

Further Assistant Directors: V. Gushina
I . Zhukov - A. Zlobin -T. Komarova

K. Samoylova - N. Sedova - T. Shelest

Operators: A. Malushev - A. Rodionov

Interns: I . Bolotnikov - T. Detkina
Yu. Pankosyanova - R. Salakhutdinov

R. Salimov - A. Tyutyn

Assistant Operator: A. Solovyev

Steadicam: B. Rafiev

Assistant Set Designers: V. Bokovenko
T. Voronkova - M. Evstigneeva

O. Nikolaev - V. Orlov
E. Petrov - B. Poroshin

Stunt Coordinator: O. Vasilyuk

Stunt Performers:
A. Gorbachev - A. Ivanov - N. Pavlyuk

A. Pangayev - S. Petrov - Ye. Tsurko

Photographer: S. Aksyonov

Special Effects and Titles:
V. Okovityj - O. Plaksin - I . Plaksin

Sound Artist: S. Figner

Assistant Editor:
O. Laboskina - I. Sarkisyan

Makeup Assistants: O. Grebenyuk
K. Nadeykina - Ya. Pestunova - O. Popova

Pyrotechnicians: V. Agapov - A. Alekseev
D. Voronzov - T. Gordin - V. Klimov

V. Panikarovskij - D. Razrezov
Yu. Epstein

Graphic Design:
Yu. Lukina - A. Lukin - E. Okopnaya

Shooting in the Czech Republic:

"ANCOR-film" Organization s.r.o.
I . Bykova - A. Bykov

Set design: "ARVA a.s."
K. Vacek - I . Vackova

Propman: L. Vaniacek

Special Makeup: Pyotr Gorshenin's Studio
"FX Design Group Int"

Vlad Taupesc's Studio "Super-Phantom"

Administration: T. Zaitseva

Executive Producer:
M. Dovladbegyan

Assistant Producer: T. Kameneva

Producers: R. Nasibulin - V. Izvekov

Boris Pasternak's poem "Hamlet"
is recited in the film

The film was produced with
the technical support of Lenfilm Studio

Film development:
CineLab Digital Lounge

Music and sound recorded
at Dolby Digital sound studio at Lenfilm

Consultant Dolby Laboratories:
M. Nasonkin

Film: Kodak - Ilford

A special thanks
to Cinestudi Lenfilm

© Sever LLC, 2013