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1
00:00:00,628 --> 00:00:05,558
Passing over soon into
2
00:00:05,560 --> 00:00:08,598
the county of Devon.
3
00:00:08,599 --> 00:00:13,598
Happy faces in anticipation
4
00:00:13,599 --> 00:00:16,599
of Babbacombe Model Village!
5
00:00:18,080 --> 00:00:19,598
Oops!
6
00:00:19,599 --> 00:00:21,760
Somebody needs a little leak.
7
00:00:24,599 --> 00:00:26,598
No number twos!
8
00:00:26,599 --> 00:00:28,598
HORN BLARES
9
00:00:28,599 --> 00:00:30,598
What's this bit, Pete?
10
00:00:30,599 --> 00:00:32,598
Is this Devon?
11
00:00:32,599 --> 00:00:35,239
Is this Devon?
12
00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:37,598
Pee-wee. Oi, oi, don't do that!
13
00:00:37,599 --> 00:00:42,598
Don't do that! Woohoo!
CHUCKLING
14
00:00:42,599 --> 00:00:44,598
So, what the bloody hell
are you going to do?
15
00:00:44,599 --> 00:00:48,598
Can't take us all day-tripping
forever just because of a bit of bother in bloody Bognor.
16
00:00:48,599 --> 00:00:51,599
Please do not talk to the driver
when the coach is in motion.
17
00:00:51,600 --> 00:00:53,919
I don't need it today, Barry.
18
00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:57,599
Lighten up, Pete, will you?
Not all doom and gloom!
19
00:00:57,600 --> 00:01:00,919
My, my head hurts.
20
00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:04,598
My car won't start.
My house has been broken into.
21
00:01:04,599 --> 00:01:06,598
My job is on the line.
22
00:01:06,599 --> 00:01:08,598
My mother's lost the plot.
23
00:01:08,599 --> 00:01:11,598
I'm being hounded by
two human traffickers,
24
00:01:11,599 --> 00:01:14,598
which is a first! OK, OK!
25
00:01:14,599 --> 00:01:17,919
And today I have 20 modelling
enthusiasts looking to me for a fun
26
00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:21,598
day out, so, will I lighten up, huh?
27
00:01:21,599 --> 00:01:24,599
TYRES SCREECH
Whoa!
28
00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:29,559
Sorry!
It's a 50 limit here, driver!
29
00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:32,599
Sorry, rabbit. Rabbit in the road.
Sorry!
30
00:01:42,599 --> 00:01:45,598
It's all right, it's all right.
Don't worry about him.
31
00:01:45,599 --> 00:01:47,599
Everything's going to be great.
32
00:01:49,240 --> 00:01:50,599
Everything OK.
33
00:01:54,599 --> 00:01:57,598
Just drop her off, mate. What?
34
00:01:57,599 --> 00:02:00,598
Yeah, pull into the services,
tell her the party's over.
35
00:02:00,599 --> 00:02:03,599
She's a liability. A Jonah.
36
00:02:06,599 --> 00:02:08,759
Mum's pleased to see me,
aren't you, Mum?
37
00:02:08,760 --> 00:02:11,598
I'm on a secret mission.
Are you, Nan?
38
00:02:11,599 --> 00:02:13,080
I'm afraid I can't discuss it.
39
00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:20,240
I've got both my boys back.
40
00:02:22,599 --> 00:02:25,598
Just going to nip
to the dunny, Pete.
41
00:02:25,599 --> 00:02:27,599
That's toilet in Australian.
42
00:02:29,920 --> 00:02:31,599
Toilet.
43
00:02:39,599 --> 00:02:42,599
MUSIC: Greensleeves
44
00:02:45,599 --> 00:02:48,598
Righty-o, folks, time
to meet the little people.
45
00:02:48,599 --> 00:02:51,399
Make sure you're back
in by ten to five.
46
00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:55,598
And it looks like the sun
has got his hat back on!
47
00:02:55,599 --> 00:02:58,598
Is it safe to leave
valuables on board, driver? Yep.
48
00:02:58,599 --> 00:03:03,239
Erm, I've left a tripod.
It's a good one.
49
00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:06,598
I'm sure it'll be fine.
So, you're staying on, then? No.
50
00:03:06,599 --> 00:03:10,598
No, no, but I'm sure... Oh, I'll
leave it. I'll leave it.
51
00:03:10,599 --> 00:03:13,599
Second thoughts...
52
00:03:16,599 --> 00:03:18,599
No, leave it, leave it.
53
00:03:21,599 --> 00:03:23,599
HE SIGHS
54
00:03:28,599 --> 00:03:31,599
Let's have a top day out!
55
00:03:32,599 --> 00:03:35,759
Shut up, Baz. Come on, dickhead.
56
00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:39,598
What are you doing here? Kay asked
me to come. Come along, dear.
57
00:03:39,599 --> 00:03:42,598
Well, you're supposed to be at work.
It's Saturday, Pete.
58
00:03:42,599 --> 00:03:45,598
You have a big funeral on.
Yeah, that's on Monday.
59
00:03:45,599 --> 00:03:50,598
Kayla, wait for us, dickhead!
Can I go on the rides? Can I?
60
00:03:50,599 --> 00:03:54,598
Well, I'm not sure there are any
rides, Mum. Oh, that's a shame.
61
00:03:54,599 --> 00:03:56,599
I do love a log flume.
62
00:04:00,599 --> 00:04:02,598
You'll be all right.
63
00:04:02,599 --> 00:04:04,239
It's a model village.
64
00:04:04,240 --> 00:04:06,598
Man, that's the whole
of the country here.
65
00:04:06,599 --> 00:04:10,598
Oh, look, a real-life giant!
Oh, a real-life giant!
66
00:04:10,599 --> 00:04:12,919
Where do you want to go, Nan?
67
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:18,598
1953. Come on. Real-life giant!
68
00:04:18,599 --> 00:04:21,599
Never seen one of those before!
Thank you, kind sir.
69
00:04:24,599 --> 00:04:27,599
Oh, look...
INDISTINCT CHAT AND LAUGHTER
70
00:04:41,599 --> 00:04:43,599
HE SPEAKS IN POLISH
71
00:04:46,599 --> 00:04:49,239
OK.
72
00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:50,599
Let's do this.
73
00:04:52,400 --> 00:04:54,599
CHEERING
74
00:04:55,599 --> 00:04:57,599
TRAIN HORN BLOWS
75
00:04:59,599 --> 00:05:02,759
The druids gathered in a field
in England 3,000 years ago.
76
00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:04,599
No-one knew why...
77
00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:09,598
You've changed. Have I now?
78
00:05:09,599 --> 00:05:12,599
Put on a bit of weight,
gone all serious.
79
00:05:15,400 --> 00:05:17,239
I think Mum's looking great!
80
00:05:17,240 --> 00:05:19,599
Barry, you've hardly
been here, mate.
81
00:05:26,599 --> 00:05:28,598
Ah!
82
00:05:28,599 --> 00:05:30,599
Ah, dammit!
83
00:05:32,599 --> 00:05:34,598
I'm looking for two Zooms, mate.
84
00:05:34,599 --> 00:05:38,598
Sorry. She can't manage on her own.
85
00:05:38,599 --> 00:05:41,239
Oh, maybe we should put
her in a home, then.
86
00:05:41,240 --> 00:05:42,598
That's your solution, is it?
87
00:05:42,599 --> 00:05:45,559
10,000 miles and that's the best
you could come up with?
88
00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:47,599
It's 2am in the morning, Pee-wee.
89
00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:52,559
Why have you come over?
You told me to.
90
00:05:52,560 --> 00:05:55,919
To look after Mum, not to put her in
a home! "> Right. So, do it!
91
00:05:55,920 --> 00:06:02,598
That's what I'm doing! No, you're
not! Yes, I am! Look, I'm ready, mate! I'm prepared!
92
00:06:02,599 --> 00:06:04,598
163;4, please.
93
00:06:04,599 --> 00:06:06,599
Ah, I've only got dollars.
94
00:06:13,599 --> 00:06:15,599
Good to see you, mate.
95
00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:27,598
Ice cream, ice cream, ice cream!
Look at the church!
96
00:06:27,599 --> 00:06:30,919
Your uncle appears to be a bit of a
dick. He's a big dick.
97
00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:32,598
A didgeri-dick.
98
00:06:32,599 --> 00:06:35,598
He said I should come visit him,
said he'd get me a job.
99
00:06:35,599 --> 00:06:41,598
Oh, why don't you? Because he's a
dick. "> A boomer-dick! Go on.
100
00:06:41,599 --> 00:06:44,598
Well, it's a dick that
comes back when you...
101
00:06:44,599 --> 00:06:46,598
..when you throw it.
102
00:06:46,599 --> 00:06:49,559
That's your kind of dick!
SHE LAUGHS
103
00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:52,599
Old lady there. You all right, Rita?
104
00:06:53,599 --> 00:06:56,599
RECORDING OF DOG BARKING,
PIGEONS COOING
105
00:06:58,599 --> 00:07:02,399
Looks like you can buy ice creams
106
00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:04,598
at the box office if you're a bit
107
00:07:04,599 --> 00:07:07,598
peckish on the way in.
Can I help you?
108
00:07:07,599 --> 00:07:09,598
Oh, no, just ignore me.
109
00:07:09,599 --> 00:07:11,599
Just pretend I'm not even here.
110
00:07:14,599 --> 00:07:16,598
Twins.
111
00:07:16,599 --> 00:07:18,598
Oh, very perceptive.
112
00:07:18,599 --> 00:07:21,598
Well, that's my specialism. Right.
113
00:07:21,599 --> 00:07:25,598
300 subscribers on YouTube.
114
00:07:25,599 --> 00:07:29,598
I go to places, I film
them and I upload them.
115
00:07:29,599 --> 00:07:31,598
Right.
116
00:07:31,599 --> 00:07:34,598
I've been trying to work you
lot out.
117
00:07:34,599 --> 00:07:36,599
Well, we're not
the attraction today, mate.
118
00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:40,599
Oh, very funny!
No, no, no, your grouping.
119
00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:43,598
Are you family?
120
00:07:43,599 --> 00:07:45,598
Or a club or something?
121
00:07:45,599 --> 00:07:48,598
Er... family.
122
00:07:48,599 --> 00:07:52,599
Oh, now you say it, yeah,
it makes sense, yeah. HE CHUCKLES
123
00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:57,240
See you later. Bye!
124
00:07:58,599 --> 00:08:01,399
Strange fella.
125
00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:03,598
He's running away.
126
00:08:03,599 --> 00:08:06,080
Very strange energy.
127
00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:10,598
HE CHUCKLES
Anyway, back to the little people.
128
00:08:10,599 --> 00:08:13,599
SCREAMING, SIREN
129
00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:20,598
I am Gulliver!
130
00:08:20,599 --> 00:08:23,399
Join me on my travels
through Lilliput!
131
00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:26,599
Fun and family activities
by the castle at 3pm.
132
00:08:28,599 --> 00:08:30,599
I am Gulliver! Oi, mate!
133
00:08:32,080 --> 00:08:34,919
Ah, and what can I do
for you little people?
134
00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:38,598
Are you the real-life giant? What?
135
00:08:38,599 --> 00:08:41,598
It said on the board, "real-life
giant". That's, that's me!
136
00:08:41,599 --> 00:08:44,599
I am Gulliver!
Yeah, those are stilts.
137
00:08:46,560 --> 00:08:52,598
Yeah, yeah, it's... it's for the
kiddies.
138
00:08:52,599 --> 00:08:53,599
I forgive you.
139
00:08:55,080 --> 00:08:58,598
You know that's
a nudist beach, yeah?
140
00:08:58,599 --> 00:09:01,560
MUSIC: Did You Ever Have A Dream
by David Bowie
141
00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:07,239
Did you ever have a dream or two
142
00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:10,598
Where the hero is a guy named you
143
00:09:10,599 --> 00:09:12,599
And the things he does are just
too much
144
00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:16,598
Does he fly like Mr Superman,
speak Chinese, French and Dutch?
145
00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:19,598
And did you ever
have a dream or two?
146
00:09:19,599 --> 00:09:21,919
Have you ever woken up one day
147
00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:25,598
With the feeling
that you'd been away?
148
00:09:25,599 --> 00:09:28,598
If the girl that you dreamed of
last night
149
00:09:28,599 --> 00:09:31,598
Had the same dream
in the very same scene
150
00:09:31,599 --> 00:09:34,598
With the very same boy, hold tight
151
00:09:34,599 --> 00:09:37,759
It's a very special knowledge that
you've got, my friend
152
00:09:37,760 --> 00:09:41,079
You can travel anywhere with
anyone you care
153
00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:44,598
It's a very special knowledge that
you've got, my friend
154
00:09:44,599 --> 00:09:48,598
You can walk around in New York
while you sleep in Penge
155
00:09:48,599 --> 00:09:53,598
I will travel round
the world one night...
156
00:09:53,599 --> 00:09:55,598
Shit!
157
00:09:55,599 --> 00:09:57,599
MUSIC: Greensleeves
158
00:10:17,599 --> 00:10:18,599
There.
159
00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:27,599
Sorry, sorry.
160
00:10:41,599 --> 00:10:43,599
Aaaaawww!
161
00:10:47,599 --> 00:10:49,599
Shit, shit, quick! Shit, quick!
162
00:10:56,599 --> 00:10:58,599
METALLIC CLANK
163
00:11:02,599 --> 00:11:05,599
HE SPEAKS IN OWN LANGUAGE
164
00:11:21,599 --> 00:11:24,559
Yeah, well, I didn't understand
a word of that anyway!
165
00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:26,598
HE SHOUTS BACK IN OWN LANGUAGE
166
00:11:26,599 --> 00:11:28,598
ENGINE STARTS
167
00:11:28,599 --> 00:11:31,599
MUSIC: Have You Ever Had A Dream
by David Bowie
168
00:11:41,599 --> 00:11:43,599
RECORDING OF CHEERING
169
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:50,598
Right, a very important bit now,
subscribers - the toilet.
170
00:11:50,599 --> 00:11:53,759
Not too shabby by my reckoning.
171
00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:57,598
Room for enhancement,
but perfectly adequate.
172
00:11:57,599 --> 00:12:02,598
Well, then I went on to play
the soothsayer in Julius Caesar.
173
00:12:02,599 --> 00:12:06,599
Then it was Wind In The Willows
down here after that.
174
00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:09,598
Lived at home for a bit.
175
00:12:09,599 --> 00:12:13,240
Well, this... this
is just for summer.
176
00:12:14,599 --> 00:12:16,598
What about you, Bradley?
177
00:12:16,599 --> 00:12:19,598
Undertaker. I bury the dead.
178
00:12:19,599 --> 00:12:21,598Cool.
179
00:12:21,599 --> 00:12:22,920
Watch this.
180
00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:52,598
Have you found her?
I'm looking, I'm looking.
181
00:12:52,599 --> 00:12:55,598
Fucking find her!
182
00:12:55,599 --> 00:12:56,599
And we lived here.
183
00:12:57,600 --> 00:13:00,399
You see there, by the other house?
184
00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:03,559
Where were you? Erm... long way.
185
00:13:03,560 --> 00:13:07,399
Oh! But you can come visit.
I've got her. I can see her.
186
00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:09,599
Good. Get it done!
187
00:13:11,599 --> 00:13:14,598
Then he come down this road here,
188
00:13:14,599 --> 00:13:18,598
down here past this road accident,
189
00:13:18,599 --> 00:13:22,598
and down with his
little, cosy feet...
190
00:13:22,599 --> 00:13:25,599
I suppose we all must
have been much smaller then.
191
00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:28,239
And you were... What's this?
192
00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:30,759
Yes, we had his lunch in there.
193
00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:33,759
And big Barry the bailiff, love it.
Oh, I love big Barry.
194
00:13:33,760 --> 00:13:38,079
See his blue van there? Big Barry
the bailiff. Oh, he was lovely!
195
00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:40,599
I don't know where that is.
196
00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:49,598
THEY LAUGH
197
00:13:49,599 --> 00:13:53,599
Oh, the train,
the train's always on time.
198
00:13:54,599 --> 00:13:57,598
So, then what?
199
Oh, what, move back to London?
200
00:13:59,599 --> 00:14:03,598
Yeah? I'm going back to Birmingham.
Oh, yeah?
201
00:14:03,599 --> 00:14:07,598
She's been saying that ever since I
knew you. Well, it's true.
202
00:14:07,599 --> 00:14:09,079
Are you going to leave me?
203
00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:14,598
I'm going to go talk to my mum,
aren't I? She there? Yeah.
204
00:14:14,599 --> 00:14:16,240
Yeah.
205
00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:20,599
You look good in those.
206
00:14:21,599 --> 00:14:23,239
Oh, thanks.
207
00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:25,920
Glad you think so. You're welcome.
208
00:14:45,599 --> 00:14:48,599
CHILDREN YELL
209
00:15:52,599 --> 00:15:54,598
Oh! Oh, you got me there!
210
00:15:54,599 --> 00:15:56,598
You all right, Joy?
211
00:15:56,599 --> 00:15:59,598
Oh, yeah, hello, David!
Are you working on the boats, too?
212
00:15:59,599 --> 00:16:02,598
You know me, Joy. Look at that! Me!
213
00:16:02,599 --> 00:16:05,598
Yeah, you're great.
You're really good at this.
214
00:16:05,599 --> 00:16:08,598
Look at that over there. Look at
that. Wahey, look, I beat you!
215
00:16:08,599 --> 00:16:11,400
I beat you, I beat you, I beat you!
THEY LAUGH
216
00:16:23,599 --> 00:16:28,598
Game over. Finish. Yeah.
Well, that was terrific.
217
00:16:28,599 --> 00:16:30,598
Good.
218
00:16:30,599 --> 00:16:33,919
I wonder if I could treat you two
ladies to something nice.
219
00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:37,598
Oh, that's lovely, Dave!
Oh, a cup of tea wouldn't hurt.
220
00:16:37,599 --> 00:16:41,598
Do you want a cup of tea, love? Tea?
Yeah? Tea? Come on, then, let's go.
221
00:16:41,599 --> 00:16:47,559
A nice cup of tea. It's over here,
come on. Feeling parched after that. Yeah, same here.
222
00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:49,239
Excuse me!
223
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:52,400
Yeah? Tickets? Oh, yeah.
224
00:16:58,599 --> 00:17:00,599
Thank you. Thanks.
225
00:17:02,599 --> 00:17:07,598
I tell you what, why don't you...
Yeah? ..why don't you sit down here, Mum? Yeah? Just here, look.
226
00:17:07,599 --> 00:17:09,600
There you go. Yeah, there you go.
227
00:17:10,920 --> 00:17:14,919
And me and your young friend
can bring you something, yeah?
228
00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:19,598
Oh! Yeah, go on. Go on, love, it's
only Dave, it'll be all right.
229
00:17:19,599 --> 00:17:21,598
I'll be fine.We find Kayla? Soon.
230
00:17:21,599 --> 00:17:25,919
It's just, it's just
round this way, yeah? Here? Yeah.
231
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:30,760
Erm... yeah, I know a short cut,
yeah, just over here.
232
00:17:33,599 --> 00:17:35,599
It's fine, don't worry,
I've got you.
233
00:17:39,240 --> 00:17:40,599
Mum?
234
00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:43,599
Mum?
235
00:17:44,599 --> 00:17:46,400
Oh! Mum!
236
00:17:47,599 --> 00:17:49,598
Hello, Peter! Barry.
237
00:17:49,599 --> 00:17:51,599
MUSIC: The Star Spangled Banner
238
00:17:56,599 --> 00:17:58,599
Dave?
239
00:18:01,599 --> 00:18:03,239
Pete.
240
00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:04,598
What are you doing here?
241
00:18:04,599 --> 00:18:07,599
Nothing much, we're just
having a cup of tea.
242
00:18:09,599 --> 00:18:11,598
You don't drink tea, Dave.
243
00:18:11,599 --> 00:18:14,759
Leave it be. What?
244
00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:16,599
Just leave it.
245
00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:20,598
You're involved in this,
aren't you, mate? No, I'm not.
246
00:18:20,599 --> 00:18:23,598
Yes, you are. Not involved exactly.
247
00:18:23,599 --> 00:18:26,598
But, actually, exactly involved.
248
00:18:26,599 --> 00:18:28,598
You let her on the coach,
didn't you, Dave? No, I didn't.
249
00:18:28,599 --> 00:18:31,598
Yes, you did.
How much did they pay you?
250
00:18:31,599 --> 00:18:34,399
This is big, Pete.
251
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,598
It's bigger than me, mate.
It's bigger than Bognor.
252
00:18:36,599 --> 00:18:39,598
Bugger Bognor, mate.
It's Littlehampton now, mate.
253
00:18:39,599 --> 00:18:41,598
Selsey Bill, Rustington -
it's wide, man.
254
00:18:41,599 --> 00:18:45,598
She's younger than my daughter,
Dave! She'd have had it much worse back where she's from.
255
00:18:45,599 --> 00:18:49,079
That makes it all right,
does it, Dave? I can't listen to you any more, Pete.
256
00:18:49,080 --> 00:18:50,598
I've come to take her.
257
00:18:50,599 --> 00:18:54,598
You're joking! No, not unless you've
got three grand.
258
00:18:54,599 --> 00:18:57,599
She was going to work for 'em.
She was...
259
00:18:58,599 --> 00:19:02,598
Oi! Dave! Come here! Dave! Get here!
260
00:19:02,599 --> 00:19:06,598
Come here! A classic English
village from the air.
261
00:19:06,599 --> 00:19:10,598
Come back! Wait! Oh, what's she
doing? Kayla! Hey, come here! Clear disregard for the signage!
262
00:19:10,599 --> 00:19:17,399
Hey, come here! Tramping all over
the private spaces! Hey, come here! Him as well!
263
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:21,598
I'm doing really well down under,
Mum. Hey, oi, come here! You'd be proud of me, you know.
264
00:19:21,599 --> 00:19:24,598
Imports... Hey! ..exports.
265
00:19:24,599 --> 00:19:26,598
Hey, come here!
266
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:29,598
Dave! Come here!
267
00:19:29,599 --> 00:19:34,598
Dave! It looks like one of our
passengers from the charabanc...
268
00:19:34,599 --> 00:19:39,559
Come here! that's being
chased by... Dave! Just wait there!
269
00:19:39,560 --> 00:19:46,399
..a big fellow who in turn
is being chased by the driver! Oh, Dave, come on!
270
00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:51,598
A lot of tramping all over it!
Dave, leave her alone! I'm sure we'll get chucked out in a minute.
271
00:19:51,599 --> 00:19:55,598
Come here! Dave, leave her alone!
Oh! It's not exactly a fast chase!
272
00:19:55,599 --> 00:19:58,759
Come here! I don't know quite what
he wants.
273
00:19:58,760 --> 00:20:03,079
And the little people... Come back!
274
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:07,598
..tied me down with their little
ropes attached to every single
275
00:20:07,599 --> 00:20:12,598
part of me.Come back! Oi!
Help me! Help me! Help me!
276
00:20:12,599 --> 00:20:16,598
Australia's a really
exciting place, Mum. Help me, I cry!
277
00:20:16,599 --> 00:20:22,239
It's a land of opportunity. Hey!
Beautiful landscapes, wildlife...
278
00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:24,598
Help me! the cricket.
279
00:20:24,599 --> 00:20:28,759
Come here! They're just passing
the golf course now. Come here! Kayla! Hey!
280
00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:34,598
Dave! Watch out for that train,
big boy! Ooh! He landed.
281
00:20:34,599 --> 00:20:37,759
He jumped cleanly,
I didn't expect that!
282
00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:42,399
And the chaser is losing his
trousers - tighter belt required.
283
00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:46,079
Ooh, here's our driver, keeping
pace! Go on, son! Dave!
284
00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:52,598
extensive mineral deposits.
Help me! Oi! Hey!
285
00:20:52,599 --> 00:20:55,598
It's just... Help me, I cry!
286
00:20:55,599 --> 00:20:59,598
Oi!Children, help me! I just...
287
00:20:59,599 --> 00:21:01,598
Help me!
BELL RINGS
288
00:21:01,599 --> 00:21:05,598
Help me! Hey! Oi!
289
00:21:05,599 --> 00:21:08,598
Help me! Oi!
290
00:21:08,599 --> 00:21:12,598
Help me!
291
00:21:12,599 --> 00:21:15,598
Help me, I cry! Kayla!
292
00:21:15,599 --> 00:21:19,598
Children, help me!
Children, please! Dave?
293
00:21:19,599 --> 00:21:24,399
Nothing to see here! Kay, come
along. Hey, come here! INDISTINCT SHOUTING
294
00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:29,559
Mate, seriously, please.
Please, would you mind? Help me.
295
00:21:29,560 --> 00:21:33,598
They're slowing further now
as they enter that London.
296
00:21:33,599 --> 00:21:35,599
This is stupid, Pete. We're both,
we're both grown men.
297
00:21:35,600 --> 00:21:39,598
This is nothing to do with you!
It was my coach, Dave!
298
00:21:39,599 --> 00:21:43,598
This is what's going to happen,
right? I'm giving you a chance here,
299
00:21:43,599 --> 00:21:45,598
mate, to step away.
300
00:21:45,599 --> 00:21:49,399
I'm going to stand up,
I'm going to walk her out of here,
301
00:21:49,400 --> 00:21:52,919
take her back to Bognor
and we'll call it quits.
302
00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:55,598
What?! What are you talking about?!
303
00:21:55,599 --> 00:21:59,598
I'm taking her off your hands, mate.
I don't want her off my hands, Dave!
304
00:21:59,599 --> 00:22:01,759
She's tricking you, mate! No!
305
00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:05,598
Right, we'll go to the police.
306
00:22:05,599 --> 00:22:08,598
Please, Pete, I'm an idiot -
you know that.
307
00:22:08,599 --> 00:22:11,598
They'll send her back!
You want that, do you?
308
00:22:11,599 --> 00:22:15,598
Please! Pete, please! I'm begging
you! We're old mates, mate!
309
00:22:15,599 --> 00:22:19,598
You've got to understand,
I'm the fall guy, Pete!
310
00:22:19,599 --> 00:22:22,598
I'm the fall guy! They're going to
come and get me, Pete!
311
00:22:22,599 --> 00:22:24,919
They're going to come and get me,
Pete! They're going to get me!
312
00:22:24,920 --> 00:22:28,598
She's worth money, Pete!
And they want her back!
313
00:22:28,599 --> 00:22:33,079
Well, we'll buy her, Dave.
We'll pay for her. How are you going to find that sort of cash, Pete?!
314
00:22:33,080 --> 00:22:35,599
Where are you going
to find it, mate?!
315
00:22:37,560 --> 00:22:40,759
A cake sale! What?! Yeah,
a really big cake sale.
316
00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:45,598
Yeah! Yeah, a cake sale
with really big cakes!
317
00:22:45,599 --> 00:22:49,559
What are you fucking talking about,
Pete?! Yeah, massive cakes!
318
00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:52,759
And we'll sell them! And...
Sponsored walk! Raffle!
319
00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:58,598
..and a car-boot! Car-boot sale!
Fun run! What?! Tombola!
320
00:22:58,599 --> 00:23:00,598
What is wrong with you people?!
321
00:23:00,599 --> 00:23:03,598
There's thousands of them! You think
you're going to help everyone?!
322
00:23:03,599 --> 00:23:08,598
Please, think about what you're
saying here! I'm quite good at guessing things. = What?
323
00:23:08,599 --> 00:23:10,919
Guess the weight of the baby,
that sort of thing. Yeah!
324
00:23:10,920 --> 00:23:14,598
We've got a whole
payment plan now, Dave!
325
00:23:14,599 --> 00:23:16,598
HE SOBS
326
00:23:16,599 --> 00:23:19,598
Please, Pete, open your hand, Pete,
and think about me!
327
00:23:19,599 --> 00:23:23,598
Please, for one time! Please,
remember the drivers' code, Pete.
328
00:23:23,599 --> 00:23:27,598
Remember the drivers' code! There is
no drivers' code, Dave! We always fight for each other, Pete!
329
00:23:27,599 --> 00:23:30,598
No! Yes, we do!
Remember Longleat, last year, mate?
330
00:23:30,599 --> 00:23:34,919
Argh! Remember when we went to
Durdle Door, remember that? We broke down. Shut up, Dave!
331
00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:38,598
Remember when we broke
down outside Didcot and we were both
332
00:23:38,599 --> 00:23:43,598
under the van? You remember that,
Pete? I don't remember it, Dave! You've got to remember, Pete!
333
00:23:43,599 --> 00:23:47,239
You've got to remember!
Wookey Hole!
334
00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:51,239
Wookey Hole, Pete! Wookey Hole!
MUSIC: God Save The Queen
335
00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:53,599
APPLAUSE
336
00:23:54,599 --> 00:23:57,598
Just to remind everyone
that the park will be closing
337
00:23:57,599 --> 00:23:59,599
in 15 minutes.
338
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:05,598
OK... Children these days!
Just give me a second.
339
00:24:05,599 --> 00:24:07,598
Kids, man, you can't...
340
00:24:07,599 --> 00:24:10,399
You can't...
You win some, you lose some.
341
00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:13,759
I can't get them off. Absolute
nonsense! Can you slip out of that?
342
00:24:13,760 --> 00:24:17,598
Up you get, babe. Come on.
Oh, God!
343
00:24:17,599 --> 00:24:20,598
Well, what a day! That was exciting!
344
00:24:20,599 --> 00:24:24,598
345
00:24:24,599 --> 00:24:27,599
wherever you may be.
346
00:24:29,599 --> 00:24:32,239
Hey, Canberra.
347
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:34,598
Hey.
348
00:24:34,599 --> 00:24:37,599
Yeah. All the way from
Littlehampton.
349
00:24:40,599 --> 00:24:45,598
Wasn't everything so small?
It was small!
350
00:24:45,599 --> 00:24:49,598
Dinky! Dinky, it's a good word.
Is that an Australian word, dinky?
351
00:24:49,599 --> 00:24:51,599
I don't know. Fair dinkum dinky.
352
00:24:53,560 --> 00:24:56,598
What? Dinkum dinky. Dinky!
353
00:24:56,599 --> 00:24:58,599
Ladies and gents, ladies and...
354
00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:02,240
Erm...
355
00:25:03,599 --> 00:25:05,598
Um... Up the front.
356
00:25:05,599 --> 00:25:09,598
Um, ah, before we leave,
357
00:25:09,599 --> 00:25:14,400
I wonder if you'd all indulge
me your patience. CAMERA CLICKS
358
00:25:15,599 --> 00:25:18,559
I can see as I look out today
359
00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:21,598
that you are a group of good,
360
00:25:21,599 --> 00:25:26,559
kind-hearted English modellers.
361
00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:33,598
Aaw! Salt of the Earth. And I would
like to bend all your ears today
362
00:25:33,599 --> 00:25:38,598
about one of the most misunderstood
communities in our country.
363
00:25:38,599 --> 00:25:41,598
This sounds interesting,
subscribers.
364
00:25:41,599 --> 00:25:45,600
This community are...
Oh, dear! Battery depleted! BLEEPING
365
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:53,239
Going to lose your licence. Barry!
366
00:25:53,240 --> 00:25:56,598
She could get sent home anyway,
mate. Put back on a boat,
367
00:25:56,599 --> 00:26:00,598
you never know.
What's this all been about?
368
00:26:00,599 --> 00:26:03,599
All this grief and hassle?
She's got a brother here!
369
00:26:05,599 --> 00:26:08,559
Look, they tell stories, mate.
370
00:26:08,560 --> 00:26:11,599
Hmm? They see our lifestyle and,
of course, they want it,
371
00:26:11,600 --> 00:26:15,560
but all that talk
of war and stuff...
372
00:26:16,599 --> 00:26:19,599
I don't know.
She looks pretty healthy to me.
373
00:26:22,599 --> 00:26:24,559
Mum's OK with it, aren't you, Mum?
374
00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:27,598
Some company Well, I'm here for Mum.
375
00:26:27,599 --> 00:26:29,598
Well, what about Leanne and Cameron?
376
00:26:29,599 --> 00:26:33,598
Of course, but I'm here now.
377
00:26:33,599 --> 00:26:36,600
Aren't I? So... there you go.
378
00:26:39,599 --> 00:26:42,598
Kay?
379
00:26:42,599 --> 00:26:44,759
Yeah, well, she can
have my room if she wants.
380
00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:46,919
Not staying, am I?
381
00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:50,598
Sorry? She can do what she likes.
382
00:26:50,599 --> 00:26:52,598
Kay?
383
00:26:52,599 --> 00:26:55,598
Don't worry about me, darling.
384
00:26:55,599 --> 00:26:58,559
Nothing bad ever
happened to me, did it?
385
00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:00,598
No wars or nothing.
386
00:27:00,599 --> 00:27:04,559
You can have my stuff if you want.
I've got too much anyway.
387
00:27:04,560 --> 00:27:06,599
Don't know how lucky I am, do I?
388
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:12,239
I'm out of here anyway. " What?!
Been here too long.
389
00:27:12,240 --> 00:27:13,598
Like a gooseberry.
390
00:27:13,599 --> 00:27:17,598
You all sit around going,
"Oh, I wondering when Kay's going to get her shit together."
391
00:27:17,599 --> 00:27:20,399
That's all right, then,
because I'm going to go home,
392
00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:22,599
I'm going to get my stuff
and then I'm gone! Kay?
393
00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:25,599
Yes!
394
00:27:33,599 --> 00:27:37,598
You had one job, squeaky!
One fucking job!
395
00:27:37,599 --> 00:27:41,598
You failed, didn't you, you fuckwit!
THUDDING AND SMASHING
396
00:27:41,599 --> 00:27:46,598
You don't fuck up for free, mate!
There's consequences!
397
00:27:46,599 --> 00:27:49,598
Here's a consequence!
SMASHING
398
00:27:49,599 --> 00:27:53,598
Here, here's another
fucking huge consequence!
399
00:27:53,599 --> 00:27:55,598
Here, look at this
for a consequence!
400
00:27:55,599 --> 00:27:58,599
Consequence! You fucker!
401
00:28:12,920 --> 00:28:14,760
Tomorrow, probably.
402
00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:28,599
Or Monday.
403
00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:33,599
LOUD SLURPING
404
00:28:49,599 --> 00:28:51,599
LOUD SLURPING
405
00:28:51,649 --> 00:28:56,199
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