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Subtitles by explosiveskull
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♪ I BETTER TELL YOU
3
00:00:22,871 --> 00:00:25,272
♪ BEFORE YOU GET CLOSE
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00:00:25,274 --> 00:00:26,807
♪ I'M A SPECIAL CASE
5
00:00:26,809 --> 00:00:30,043
♪ I'M NOT LIKE THE OTHER ONES
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00:00:30,045 --> 00:00:32,312
♪ THERE IS A REASON
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00:00:32,314 --> 00:00:34,880
♪ WHY I'M STILL ALONE
8
00:00:34,882 --> 00:00:36,715
♪ IF YOU WANT TO STICK AROUND
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00:00:36,717 --> 00:00:39,751
♪ YOU NEED TO ASK YOURSELF
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00:00:39,753 --> 00:00:41,953
♪ ARE YOU ENOUGH OF A MAN?
11
00:00:41,955 --> 00:00:44,323
♪ CAN YOU TAKE ME AS I AM?
12
00:00:44,325 --> 00:00:46,758
♪ YOU THINK YOU
MAY BE SPECIAL, BABE ♪
13
00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:49,194
♪ BUT I'LL NEVER CHANGE
FOR SOMEONE ELSE ♪
14
00:00:49,196 --> 00:00:54,432
♪ IS YOUR HEART STRONG ENOUGH
TO HANDLE ME? ♪
15
00:00:54,434 --> 00:00:56,100
♪ YOU MAY BE SPECIAL, BABE
16
00:00:56,102 --> 00:00:58,702
♪ BUT I LIKE MY WHISKY
ON THE ROCKS ♪
17
00:00:58,704 --> 00:01:00,904
♪ YOU BETTER KNOW
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00:01:00,906 --> 00:01:03,340
♪ WHAT YOU'RE DEALING WITH
19
00:01:03,342 --> 00:01:08,177
♪ IT WON'T BE EASY
TO WIN MY HEART, BABE ♪
20
00:01:08,179 --> 00:01:10,379
♪ YOU BETTER BE READY
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00:01:10,381 --> 00:01:12,948
♪ IF YOU WANT ME
22
00:01:12,950 --> 00:01:17,986
♪ YOU BETTER KNOW THAT
YOU DON'T STAND A CHANCE, BOY ♪
23
00:01:17,988 --> 00:01:20,055
♪ ARE YOU ENOUGH OF A MAN?
24
00:01:20,057 --> 00:01:22,357
♪ CAN YOU TAKE ME AS I AM?
25
00:01:22,359 --> 00:01:24,825
♪ YOU THINK
YOU MAY BE SPECIAL, BABE ♪
26
00:01:24,827 --> 00:01:27,429
♪ BUT I'LL NEVER CHANGE
FOR SOMEONE ELSE ♪
27
00:01:27,431 --> 00:01:32,366
♪ IS YOUR HEART STRONG ENOUGH
TO HANDLE ME? ♪
28
00:01:32,368 --> 00:01:34,235
♪ YOU MAY BE SPECIAL, BABE
29
00:01:34,237 --> 00:01:36,870
♪ BUT I LIKE MY WHISKY
ON THE ROCKS ♪
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00:01:36,872 --> 00:01:39,472
LOOK, IT'S AS SIMPLE AS THIS,
IN TECH AND IN LIFE:
31
00:01:39,474 --> 00:01:42,244
IF YOU'RE NOT DISRUPTING,
YOU'RE NOT INNOVATING.
32
00:01:44,945 --> 00:01:47,413
YOU HAVEN'T SAID A WORD
IN TWO HOURS.
33
00:01:47,415 --> 00:01:49,748
OH, SORRY,
I WAS WATCHING SIMON LANG.
34
00:01:49,750 --> 00:01:51,416
- I...
- SIMON LANG?
35
00:01:51,418 --> 00:01:53,152
WHEN ARE YOU GONNA INTERACT
WITH REAL PEOPLE
36
00:01:53,154 --> 00:01:54,886
WHO ARE RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU?
37
00:01:54,888 --> 00:01:57,021
YOU KNOW, THE GREAT THING
ABOUT COLLEGE IS
38
00:01:57,023 --> 00:01:59,359
IT'S THE OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE
FRIENDSHIPS THAT LAST A LIFETIME.
39
00:02:01,161 --> 00:02:02,994
[MOTHER] DO YOU KNOW WHO
YOUR ROOMMATE'S GONNA BE?
40
00:02:02,996 --> 00:02:05,896
A GUY NAMED LANCE BLACK.
41
00:02:05,898 --> 00:02:07,231
I BET HE'S LOVELY.
42
00:02:07,233 --> 00:02:09,900
DID YOU CALL
TO INTRODUCE YOURSELF?
43
00:02:09,902 --> 00:02:12,769
I DID, I DID.
I LEFT HIM A VOICEMAIL.
44
00:02:12,771 --> 00:02:16,039
- NEVER CALLED BACK.
- WELL, DID YOU SOUND LIKE A NERD?
45
00:02:16,041 --> 00:02:18,774
SORRY.
SOUNDED LIKE MYSELF.
46
00:02:18,776 --> 00:02:20,477
YEAH, THAT'S WHY
HE DIDN'T CALL BACK.
47
00:02:20,479 --> 00:02:23,445
[SIGHS] OH, ASHLEY.
GUYS, PLEASE.
48
00:02:23,447 --> 00:02:25,316
- ENTREZ-NOUS.
- OKAY.
49
00:02:26,917 --> 00:02:27,984
HERE WE GO.
50
00:02:30,353 --> 00:02:32,120
OH, IT'S, UM...
51
00:02:32,122 --> 00:02:34,891
IT'S A LITTLE SMALLER
THAN IT LOOKED IN THE BROCHURE.
52
00:02:36,159 --> 00:02:37,392
I THINK IT'S BIG ENOUGH
FOR TWO PEOPLE.
53
00:02:37,394 --> 00:02:40,093
WHAT IF YOU WANT
TO HAVE FRIENDS OVER?
54
00:02:40,095 --> 00:02:43,497
LET'S GET REAL, MOM.
THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN.
55
00:02:43,499 --> 00:02:46,433
JAMES, PLEASE DON'T LET THE
COMPUTER BE YOUR ONLY FRIEND.
56
00:02:46,435 --> 00:02:47,802
JAMES: IT'S NOT.
57
00:02:49,103 --> 00:02:50,337
[SCOFFS]
58
00:02:50,339 --> 00:02:51,473
IT'S HOPELESS.
59
00:02:53,775 --> 00:02:55,840
OKAY.
60
00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:57,376
ONE DAY,
I WILL CODE AN APP
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00:02:57,378 --> 00:02:59,077
THAT WILL REALLY
MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
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00:02:59,079 --> 00:03:02,247
JAMES, I KNOW IT'S
NOT PRINCETON OR M.I.T.
63
00:03:02,249 --> 00:03:03,984
NO, MOM, DON'T DO THAT.
IT'S OKAY.
64
00:03:05,819 --> 00:03:07,252
[SIGHS]
I JUST REALLY HOPE
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00:03:07,254 --> 00:03:09,187
MY ROOMMATE'S, LIKE,
AT LEAST A LITTLE SMART.
66
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,922
MOM, LET'S GO.
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00:03:11,924 --> 00:03:14,258
I'VE GOT A PARTY
TO GET TO TONIGHT.
68
00:03:14,260 --> 00:03:17,161
OKAY.
AAH.
69
00:03:17,163 --> 00:03:19,263
THIS IS WHERE I LEAVE YOU.
70
00:03:19,265 --> 00:03:21,498
OOH, I LOVE YOU,
I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU.
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00:03:21,500 --> 00:03:24,369
OKAY, JAMES... HAVE FUN.
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00:03:25,904 --> 00:03:28,104
- BYE, JAMES.
- BYE, JAMES.
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00:03:28,106 --> 00:03:30,139
BE GOOD.
NO, DON'T BE GOOD.
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00:03:30,141 --> 00:03:32,140
BE ROTTEN,
BUT EAT GOOD,
75
00:03:32,142 --> 00:03:35,944
- AND HAVE FUN, AND...
- MOM, LET'S GO.
76
00:03:35,946 --> 00:03:37,847
I'M SURE YOUR ROOMMATE
WILL BE LOVELY.
77
00:03:42,185 --> 00:03:43,186
[SIGHS]
78
00:04:06,073 --> 00:04:07,074
JAMES: OH.
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00:04:08,442 --> 00:04:11,143
HI.
YOU MUST BE LANCE.
80
00:04:11,145 --> 00:04:16,615
YEAH. YOU MUST BE MY SOON-TO-BE-TRANSFERRED-
TO-ANOTHER-COLLEGE ROOMMATE.
81
00:04:16,617 --> 00:04:18,583
OH, OKAY.
UM...
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00:04:18,585 --> 00:04:20,184
SO THIS IS YOUR SIDE
OF THE ROOM.
83
00:04:20,186 --> 00:04:22,320
I HAVE LEFT IT
COMPLETELY UNTOUCHED.
84
00:04:22,322 --> 00:04:24,087
DO YOU NEED HELP
BRINGING ANYTHING IN?
85
00:04:24,089 --> 00:04:26,358
NO, I GOT IT COVERED.
THANKS, THOUGH.
86
00:04:27,860 --> 00:04:29,361
HEY, DO YOU WANT TO GRAB
SOMETHING TO EAT?
87
00:04:30,862 --> 00:04:32,895
ACTUALLY, YEAH,
AS A MATTER OF FACT, I DO.
88
00:04:32,897 --> 00:04:34,230
- YEAH.
- OKAY, COOL.
89
00:04:34,232 --> 00:04:35,865
I'LL SEE YOU, MAN.
90
00:04:35,867 --> 00:04:37,634
UH, OKAY, NO, YEAH.
91
00:04:37,636 --> 00:04:39,568
THAT'S... THAT'S COOL.
I HAVE SOMETHING TO DO.
92
00:04:39,570 --> 00:04:41,404
I WAS GONNA FINISH UP
ON SOME WORK THAT I WAS DOING,
93
00:04:41,406 --> 00:04:44,640
SO MAYBE WE COULD CHAT ABOUT IT
LATER OVER SOME CHAI TEA,
94
00:04:44,642 --> 00:04:47,177
OR... OKAY.
95
00:04:50,647 --> 00:04:53,849
[MUSIC PLAYING]
96
00:04:56,486 --> 00:04:59,286
HERE YOU GO, MAN.
HAVE A NICE NIGHT.
97
00:04:59,288 --> 00:05:01,457
WOMAN: ORDER NUMBER SEVEN
IS READY!
98
00:05:08,897 --> 00:05:10,832
GOD, I JUST WANT TO KISS YOU.
99
00:05:12,634 --> 00:05:14,300
I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOUR NAME.
100
00:05:14,302 --> 00:05:16,001
OH, IT'S... UH, IT'S ROB.
101
00:05:16,003 --> 00:05:19,571
ROB.
WHAT'S YOUR LAST NAME, ROB?
102
00:05:19,573 --> 00:05:22,507
[CHUCKLES] WHY DO YOU
NEED SO MUCH INFORMATION?
103
00:05:22,509 --> 00:05:25,410
YOUR LAST NAME IS
"SO MUCH INFORMATION"?
104
00:05:25,412 --> 00:05:27,446
WELL, YEAH.
105
00:05:27,448 --> 00:05:29,882
LOOK, YOU SEE THIS?
106
00:05:30,683 --> 00:05:32,116
WHAT? IT'S A PHONE.
107
00:05:32,118 --> 00:05:33,451
NO, NO, NO,
IT'S NOT A PHONE.
108
00:05:33,453 --> 00:05:36,953
THIS IS A 24/7 PORTAL
TO ALL THE SEX THAT
109
00:05:36,955 --> 00:05:39,489
I COULD EVER DREAM ABOUT.
110
00:05:39,491 --> 00:05:41,224
ALL I HAVE TO DO IS CLICK.
111
00:05:41,226 --> 00:05:42,692
SO...?
112
00:05:42,694 --> 00:05:46,363
SO, I MEAN,
YOU'RE OBSOLETE.
113
00:05:46,365 --> 00:05:49,599
OKAY, LIKE, I'M NOT GONNA TELL
YOU WHAT MY LAST NAME IS,
114
00:05:49,601 --> 00:05:51,400
AND I'M NOT GONNA TELL YOU
WHERE I'M FROM
115
00:05:51,402 --> 00:05:54,470
OR WHERE I GO TO SCHOOL
OR WHAT I DO AT SCHOOL, OKAY?
116
00:05:54,472 --> 00:05:57,038
AND YOU KNOW
WHAT THE BEST PART IS?
117
00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:59,409
I DON'T HAVE TO, OKAY?
118
00:06:02,345 --> 00:06:04,645
HEY, HEY, WESLEY, MAN.
WAIT UP, MAN.
119
00:06:04,647 --> 00:06:06,381
WESLEY.
120
00:06:06,383 --> 00:06:07,582
HE WAS CUTE.
121
00:06:07,584 --> 00:06:10,317
- I GUESS.
- WHY'D HE LEAVE?
122
00:06:10,319 --> 00:06:12,652
HE WOULDN'T EVEN TELL ME
HIS LAST NAME.
123
00:06:12,654 --> 00:06:14,521
SO?
124
00:06:14,523 --> 00:06:15,988
SO I'M GOING HOME.
125
00:06:15,990 --> 00:06:17,324
HEY, WAIT.
126
00:06:17,326 --> 00:06:19,293
MIND IF I HOOK UP WITH HIM?
127
00:06:20,228 --> 00:06:21,529
WHATEVER, RACHEL.
128
00:06:23,398 --> 00:06:25,698
HEY, WAIT UP.
I DON'T CARE WHAT YOUR NAME IS,
129
00:06:25,700 --> 00:06:27,468
FIRST OR LAST.
130
00:06:29,604 --> 00:06:30,605
HANNAH?
131
00:06:32,172 --> 00:06:35,573
- YOU GO TO SCHOOL HERE?
- YEP.
132
00:06:35,575 --> 00:06:38,710
- ME, TOO.
- OKAY, COOL.
133
00:06:38,712 --> 00:06:40,445
I MEAN, I HAVEN'T
SEEN YOU SINCE...
134
00:06:40,447 --> 00:06:43,013
SINCE PROM NIGHT IN MAY.
135
00:06:43,015 --> 00:06:45,048
YEAH, JAMES, LET'S PLEASE
NOT TALK ABOUT IT.
136
00:06:45,050 --> 00:06:47,317
LOOK, I WAS JUST
TRYING TO IMPRESS YOU.
137
00:06:47,319 --> 00:06:50,454
- YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT IT.
- LOOK, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID SO WRONG.
138
00:06:50,456 --> 00:06:53,122
I MEAN, I...
WAS MY VOICE THAT BAD?
139
00:06:53,124 --> 00:06:55,591
NO, YOUR VOICE WAS GREAT.
140
00:06:55,593 --> 00:06:58,261
THEN WHAT DID I DO WRONG?
141
00:06:58,263 --> 00:07:00,061
JAMES.
142
00:07:00,063 --> 00:07:02,498
YOU KNOW HOW SHY I AM.
143
00:07:02,500 --> 00:07:04,366
WHEN YOU PICKED UP
THAT MICROPHONE
144
00:07:04,368 --> 00:07:06,568
AND ANNOUNCED MY NAME IN FRONT
OF A ROOM FULL OF PEOPLE,
145
00:07:06,570 --> 00:07:09,504
400 PAIRS OF EYES
TURNED TO FACE ME.
146
00:07:09,506 --> 00:07:12,607
I WAS MORTIFIED.
I UNDERSTAND
147
00:07:12,609 --> 00:07:15,609
THAT YOU WANTED TO EXPRESS
YOUR FEELINGS TO ME,
148
00:07:15,611 --> 00:07:18,746
BUT THERE'S A WAY BETTER WAY OF
DOING THAT THAN HUMILIATING ME.
149
00:07:18,748 --> 00:07:22,348
HANNAH, I'M REALLY SORRY.
SERIOUSLY, MY INTENTIONS
150
00:07:22,350 --> 00:07:24,217
WERE THE EXACT OPPOSITE
OF THE RESULTS,
151
00:07:24,219 --> 00:07:26,352
AND I WAS JUST TRYING
TO SHOW YOU THAT I LIKED YOU
152
00:07:26,354 --> 00:07:28,388
BEFORE WE GRADUATED
AND WENT OFF TO COLLEGE,
153
00:07:28,390 --> 00:07:32,559
AND I TRIED FOR FOUR YEARS
AND NOTHING WORKED.
154
00:07:32,561 --> 00:07:37,129
PLEASE JUST WALK ME TO MY DORM
AND THEN LEAVE ME ALONE.
155
00:07:37,131 --> 00:07:38,730
I'M JUST NEVER
GONNA SING AGAIN.
156
00:07:38,732 --> 00:07:40,399
NO, YOU DON'T
HAVE TO DO THAT,
157
00:07:40,401 --> 00:07:42,668
AND YOU REALLY DON'T HAVE
TO DO THAT FOR ME.
158
00:07:42,670 --> 00:07:44,670
I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR YOU,
HANNAH.
159
00:07:44,672 --> 00:07:49,042
THEN PLEASE, LEAVE ME ALONE IN
MY QUIET SPACE WITH MY BOOKS.
160
00:07:53,312 --> 00:07:55,145
IF YOU WANT TO READ,
I'LL WATCH THE GROUND
161
00:07:55,147 --> 00:07:57,481
SO YOU DON'T TRIP
ON ANYTHING ELSE.
162
00:07:57,483 --> 00:07:58,484
OKAY.
163
00:07:59,785 --> 00:08:01,785
AT LEAST TELL ME
WHAT YOU'RE READING.
164
00:08:01,787 --> 00:08:04,690
- "SENSE AND SENSIBILITY" BY JANE AUSTEN.
- JANE AUSTEN.
165
00:08:05,791 --> 00:08:07,690
HAVE YOU READ HER WORK?
166
00:08:07,692 --> 00:08:10,226
I LOVE JANE AUSTEN, YEAH.
167
00:08:10,228 --> 00:08:13,496
- ME, TOO.
- WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PART ABOUT HER?
168
00:08:13,498 --> 00:08:17,232
SHE WRITES COMPLEX,
STRONG FEMALE CHARACTERS.
169
00:08:17,234 --> 00:08:19,667
HER CHARACTERS
ARE SO EXTRAVAGANT.
170
00:08:19,669 --> 00:08:23,505
THEIR NAMES ARE SO PRECISE,
KINDA LIKE IP ADDRESSES.
171
00:08:23,507 --> 00:08:28,043
YEAH, I MEAN, YOU CAN TELL SO MUCH
ABOUT A PERSON BY THEIR NAME.
172
00:08:40,221 --> 00:08:41,222
WELL...
173
00:08:45,693 --> 00:08:50,328
HEY, UM,
I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT...
174
00:08:50,330 --> 00:08:52,533
THERE'S A CHASM BETWEEN
MY INTENTIONS AND MY RESULTS.
175
00:08:56,102 --> 00:08:58,337
I KNOW
YOU'LL FIGURE IT OUT.
176
00:08:59,505 --> 00:09:00,839
I'LL SEE YOU IN CS.
177
00:09:00,841 --> 00:09:03,774
- ELEVATOR: FLOOR NUMBER FIVE.
- YES, YEAH.
178
00:09:03,776 --> 00:09:06,244
- I'LL SEE YOU AS WELL.
- ELEVATOR: GOING UP.
179
00:09:12,484 --> 00:09:15,652
( DOOR HANDLE JAMMING )
180
00:09:15,654 --> 00:09:17,720
[LANCE] WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! JUST
COME BACK TOMORROW, ALL RIGHT?
181
00:09:17,722 --> 00:09:19,254
I GOT COMPANY.
182
00:09:19,256 --> 00:09:20,890
WHAT? WHY?
WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO SLEEP?
183
00:09:20,892 --> 00:09:24,259
[LANCE] NOT HERE.
184
00:09:24,261 --> 00:09:27,863
JUST FIGURE IT OUT, MAN.
185
00:09:27,865 --> 00:09:31,165
YEAH, JUST ATE DINNER,
TUCKED IN FOR BED NOW.
186
00:09:31,167 --> 00:09:32,533
[WASHING MACHINE WHIRRING]
187
00:09:32,535 --> 00:09:35,303
REALLY COMFORTABLE, ACTUALLY.
188
00:09:35,305 --> 00:09:36,737
UH, YEAH,
THE SHEETS YOU GOT ME,
189
00:09:36,739 --> 00:09:39,372
THEY'RE REALLY SOFT.
190
00:09:39,374 --> 00:09:40,710
USING THEM A LOT.
191
00:09:42,411 --> 00:09:44,344
LANCE SEEMS...
192
00:09:44,346 --> 00:09:46,145
PRETTY ACCEPTING OF ME.
193
00:09:46,147 --> 00:09:48,182
[WASHING MACHINE BEEPS]
194
00:10:02,295 --> 00:10:04,195
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
195
00:10:04,197 --> 00:10:05,396
[MAN] HEY!
196
00:10:05,398 --> 00:10:08,499
OH! GET DRESSED,
GET DRESSED!
197
00:10:08,501 --> 00:10:10,367
YOU PROMISED ME
COFFEE AND BAGELS.
198
00:10:10,369 --> 00:10:12,837
YEAH, I KNOW.
I'LL SEND YOU THE GIFT CARD
199
00:10:12,839 --> 00:10:14,638
VIA THE EMAIL
FOR BAGEL BROS,
200
00:10:14,640 --> 00:10:16,206
BUT RIGHT NOW YOU GOTTA
GET DRESSED,
201
00:10:16,208 --> 00:10:17,708
- YOU'RE GOING OUT THE WINDOW.
- EXCUSE ME?
202
00:10:17,710 --> 00:10:19,843
YEAH, YOU'RE EXITING
VIA WINDOW.
203
00:10:19,845 --> 00:10:21,344
ARE YOU CRAZY?
204
00:10:21,346 --> 00:10:22,545
IT'S LITERALLY JUST
THE GROUND FLOOR,
205
00:10:22,547 --> 00:10:24,213
YOU'RE GONNA BE FINE.
206
00:10:24,215 --> 00:10:25,748
ALL THOSE NICE THINGS
I SAID ABOUT YOU LAST NIGHT,
207
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,249
I TAKE THEM ALL BACK.
208
00:10:27,251 --> 00:10:28,684
[MAN] HEY, HEY, HEY!
YOU IN THERE?
209
00:10:28,686 --> 00:10:31,219
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH!
I'M COMING, POPS!
210
00:10:31,221 --> 00:10:33,588
I'M JUST... UM...
PUTTING ON SOME PANTS.
211
00:10:33,590 --> 00:10:35,690
- [DOOR RATTLING]
- WHAT'S YOUR DAD DOING HERE?
212
00:10:35,692 --> 00:10:37,759
I THINK HE'S JUST BRINGING
ME MY STUFF, ALL RIGHT?
213
00:10:37,761 --> 00:10:39,628
BUT IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GO,
COME ON.
214
00:10:39,630 --> 00:10:40,929
[GIRL]
I'M AFRAID OF HEIGHTS.
215
00:10:40,931 --> 00:10:43,900
HEY! BIMBO FLYING!
SOMEBODY CATCH HER!
216
00:10:46,302 --> 00:10:48,268
[SCREAMS]
217
00:10:48,270 --> 00:10:49,870
HEY!
218
00:10:49,872 --> 00:10:51,672
DUDE...
219
00:10:51,674 --> 00:10:53,641
I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA HAVE
TO CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT.
220
00:10:53,643 --> 00:10:54,777
- [LAUGHTER]
- COME HERE.
221
00:10:56,778 --> 00:10:59,245
IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU, MAN.
222
00:10:59,247 --> 00:11:00,613
THANKS FOR COMING OUT.
223
00:11:00,615 --> 00:11:01,781
WOW!
224
00:11:01,783 --> 00:11:03,315
YOU HAD A GOOD TRIP UP?
225
00:11:03,317 --> 00:11:04,616
YEAH, GREAT TRIP!
WOW!
226
00:11:04,618 --> 00:11:06,885
- GOOD, GOOD, GOOD.
- WOW!
227
00:11:06,887 --> 00:11:08,420
WELL, THIS IS THE SPOT.
228
00:11:08,422 --> 00:11:09,721
AWESOME, BRO,
THIS IS AWESOME.
229
00:11:09,723 --> 00:11:11,890
- DESK, BED...
- [CHUCKLES]
230
00:11:11,892 --> 00:11:14,760
- HEY, THIS IS INGA.
- INGA?
231
00:11:14,762 --> 00:11:18,262
- [INGA] HI.
- INGA?
232
00:11:18,264 --> 00:11:20,898
WHAT HAPPENED TO FABIOLA?
233
00:11:20,900 --> 00:11:24,234
- INGA HAPPENED TO FABIOLA.
- OH.
234
00:11:24,236 --> 00:11:26,336
[CHUCKLES]
ALL GOOD, ALL GOOD.
235
00:11:26,338 --> 00:11:28,738
- OKAY.
- HEY, INGA, UNPACK EVERYTHING,
236
00:11:28,740 --> 00:11:31,241
AND THEN KINDA PUT IT ALL AWAY
NICE AND ORGANIZED.
237
00:11:31,243 --> 00:11:32,942
- SURE.
- I'MA TAKE THE BIG GUY OUT TO BREAKFAST.
238
00:11:32,944 --> 00:11:34,376
- SURE.
- IS THAT GREAT?
239
00:11:34,378 --> 00:11:35,847
BAGELS AND COFFEE.
240
00:11:39,617 --> 00:11:42,718
[PROFESSOR]
WHICH WOULD MAKE THAT...
241
00:11:42,720 --> 00:11:46,320
SORRY I'M LATE, PROFESSOR,
I WAS JUST, UM...
242
00:11:46,322 --> 00:11:49,791
READING THAT BOOK
IN YOUR SYLLABUS.
243
00:11:49,793 --> 00:11:52,260
SO LATENESS WILL PUT YOU
ON THE FAST TRACK
244
00:11:52,262 --> 00:11:53,961
TO GETTING AN F
IN MY CLASS.
245
00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:55,665
TAKE A SEAT.
246
00:11:57,033 --> 00:11:58,900
AND WIPE THE GIRL
OFF YOUR FACE, PLEASE.
247
00:11:58,902 --> 00:12:02,602
[CLEARS THROAT]
ALL RIGHT, SO, YOUR ASSIGNMENT
248
00:12:02,604 --> 00:12:04,638
WAS TO CREATE TRUTH TABLES
249
00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:06,539
BASED ON THE READING.
250
00:12:06,541 --> 00:12:10,010
SO, WHO AMONG YOU
DID THE ASSIGNMENT?
251
00:12:10,012 --> 00:12:14,046
UM, I COMPLETED THE ASSIGNMENT,
PROFESSOR BARNES.
252
00:12:14,048 --> 00:12:16,448
I'M SORRY,
TODAY'S THE FIRST DAY OF CLASS,
253
00:12:16,450 --> 00:12:17,917
WHEN DID YOU ASSIGN THIS?
254
00:12:17,919 --> 00:12:19,784
IT WAS IN YOUR SYLLABUS
I SENT EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU
255
00:12:19,786 --> 00:12:21,953
OVER TWO WEEKS AGO.
256
00:12:21,955 --> 00:12:23,455
WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
257
00:12:23,457 --> 00:12:24,856
UH, JAMES SINGER.
258
00:12:24,858 --> 00:12:26,925
ALL RIGHT, JAMES,
SINCE YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE
259
00:12:26,927 --> 00:12:27,926
WHO APPARENTLY READ
THE SYLLABUS,
260
00:12:27,928 --> 00:12:29,660
OR COMPLETED THE ASSIGNMENT,
261
00:12:29,662 --> 00:12:32,663
WOULD YOU CARE TO STAND UP
AND EXPLAIN IT TO THE CLASS?
262
00:12:32,665 --> 00:12:34,631
UH, YEAH,
OF COURSE, YEAH.
263
00:12:34,633 --> 00:12:36,700
THAT, MY FRIEND, PUTS YOU ON
THE FAST TRACK TO GETTING AN A,
264
00:12:36,702 --> 00:12:37,903
OKAY?
265
00:12:42,674 --> 00:12:45,942
UH...
266
00:12:45,944 --> 00:12:50,712
ACTUALLY, I DIDN'T DO IT,
IT WAS A DIFFERENT ONE.
267
00:12:50,714 --> 00:12:52,681
I DIDN'T COMPLETE IT AT ALL,
ACTUALLY.
268
00:12:52,683 --> 00:12:54,583
[PROFESSOR]
UH-HUH.
269
00:12:54,585 --> 00:12:57,085
GOD, I MISS NEW HAVEN.
270
00:12:57,087 --> 00:12:58,787
LISTEN...
[CLEARS THROAT]
271
00:12:58,789 --> 00:13:02,723
...THIS CLASS IS YOUR DOORWAY
TO EVERY OTHER
272
00:13:02,725 --> 00:13:06,660
COMPUTER SCIENCE COURSE
IN THIS ENTIRE COLLEGE.
273
00:13:06,662 --> 00:13:08,763
IT IS A REQUIREMENT
THAT I MAKE IT TOUGH.
274
00:13:08,765 --> 00:13:10,597
WHY IS THAT A REQUIREMENT?
275
00:13:10,599 --> 00:13:12,365
TO WEED OUT THE UNWORTHY.
276
00:13:12,367 --> 00:13:14,567
THE CODING FIELD IS OVERCROWDED
WITH DABBLERS,
277
00:13:14,569 --> 00:13:16,836
AND I FOR ONE...
EXCUSE ME, TAKE THOSE OFF!
278
00:13:16,838 --> 00:13:18,838
THANK YOU.
279
00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:21,340
AND STOP LOOKING
AT YOUR NAILS, THANK YOU.
280
00:13:21,342 --> 00:13:24,510
SO, IF YOU WANT TO TAKE ANY
OTHER COMPUTER SCIENCE COURSES
281
00:13:24,512 --> 00:13:25,811
AT THIS COLLEGE, OR YOU WANT
A CAREER IN IT,
282
00:13:25,813 --> 00:13:27,513
YOU HAVE TO TAKE MY CLASS,
283
00:13:27,515 --> 00:13:31,516
AND IN ORDER TO PASS MY CLASS,
YOU HAVE TO WORK...
284
00:13:31,518 --> 00:13:33,551
VERY HARD.
285
00:13:33,553 --> 00:13:35,288
CLASS DISMISSED.
286
00:13:42,095 --> 00:13:44,496
[MUTTERING]
287
00:13:47,866 --> 00:13:49,868
- WHAT'S UP?
- HEY, SQUARE.
288
00:13:51,502 --> 00:13:53,036
LISTEN,
ME AND THE OTHER STUDENTS,
289
00:13:53,038 --> 00:13:55,771
WE KINDA... WE'VE COME UP
WITH A PLAN.
290
00:13:55,773 --> 00:13:56,906
FOR WHAT?
291
00:13:56,908 --> 00:13:59,508
TO PASS CS.
292
00:13:59,510 --> 00:14:01,110
UH, WHAT'S THE PLAN?
293
00:14:01,112 --> 00:14:05,080
[SNORTS] BRO, ARE YOU GONNA
SLEEP WITH PROFESSOR BARNES?
294
00:14:05,082 --> 00:14:06,514
- NO, I'M NOT GONNA SLEEP WITH PROFESSOR BARNES.
- THAT'S GNARLY.
295
00:14:06,516 --> 00:14:08,483
DON'T DO IT.
296
00:14:08,485 --> 00:14:11,052
SHE WOULD PROBABLY FALL INTO A
DEPRESSION, EVEN THOUGH SHE DIGS ME.
297
00:14:11,054 --> 00:14:12,987
THE THING IS I WOULD GET
EXPELLED AND WE DON'T WANT THAT,
298
00:14:12,989 --> 00:14:15,489
SO WE HAVE TO DO THIS
A LITTLE BIT DIFFERENT.
299
00:14:15,491 --> 00:14:16,723
HERE'S WHAT I'M THINKING,
300
00:14:16,725 --> 00:14:20,093
SHE CAN'T FAIL ALL OF US
AT ONCE, OKAY?
301
00:14:20,095 --> 00:14:23,396
SO WE EITHER SINK TOGETHER
OR WE DROWN TOGETHER.
302
00:14:23,398 --> 00:14:25,498
ISN'T THAT THE SAME THING?
I THINK IT'S THE SAME THING.
303
00:14:25,500 --> 00:14:26,699
YEAH, I'M PRETTY SURE
IT'S THE POINT.
304
00:14:26,701 --> 00:14:28,501
I... I KNOW.
305
00:14:28,503 --> 00:14:31,070
I'M GONNA TELL YOU IF
AND WHEN WE DO THE ASSIGNMENTS,
306
00:14:31,072 --> 00:14:32,138
OKAY?
307
00:14:32,140 --> 00:14:33,538
HOW ARE YOU GONNA LEARN?
308
00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:36,608
- [SNORTING]
- WHAT?
309
00:14:36,610 --> 00:14:39,044
HOW ARE WE GONNA LEARN?
BRO, WE DON'T WANNA LEARN.
310
00:14:39,046 --> 00:14:41,412
WE JUST WANNA PASS
THE CS REQUIREMENTS.
311
00:14:41,414 --> 00:14:44,049
NO, SPEAK FOR YOURSELF,
WESLEY.
312
00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:46,417
SORRY, I HATE HIM.
I WANT TO LEARN.
313
00:14:46,419 --> 00:14:48,054
SEE, HE WANTS TO LEARN.
314
00:14:50,690 --> 00:14:52,590
DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE PLAN
OR NOT?
315
00:14:52,592 --> 00:14:55,792
- HE WANTS TO...
- DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M SAYING?
316
00:14:55,794 --> 00:15:00,163
- I UNDERSTAND.
- GOOD.
317
00:15:00,165 --> 00:15:01,965
WE'LL BE IN CONTACT.
318
00:15:01,967 --> 00:15:05,134
TILL THEN, DO YOU,
BOO-BOO.
319
00:15:05,136 --> 00:15:06,635
COME ON GUYS, LET'S GO.
320
00:15:06,637 --> 00:15:08,570
- SEE YOU LATER, ALLIGATOR.
- OKAY, OKAY.
321
00:15:08,572 --> 00:15:09,838
- REMEMBER THAT.
- LOVE YOU.
322
00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:11,607
WHAT?
323
00:15:11,609 --> 00:15:14,776
ALL RIGHT, NOW GUYS, WHAT
DATING APP WOULD YOU RECOMMEND?
324
00:15:14,778 --> 00:15:16,444
NONE OF 'EM, MAN,
DATING IS FOR PUTZES.
325
00:15:16,446 --> 00:15:18,146
WHY WOULD I WASTE MY MONEY
ON A MOVIE?
326
00:15:18,148 --> 00:15:20,648
- OR DINNER?
- OR FLOWERS?
327
00:15:20,650 --> 00:15:22,550
YOU KNOW, I NEVER
GAVE A GIRL FLOWERS.
328
00:15:22,552 --> 00:15:25,086
HEY, DON'T DISS FLOWERS,
MY DAD GIVES MY MOM FLOWERS
329
00:15:25,088 --> 00:15:26,653
ALL THE TIME AND IT
ALWAYS MAKES HER HAPPY.
330
00:15:26,655 --> 00:15:27,955
THAT WENT OUT
WITH THE 20TH CENTURY.
331
00:15:27,957 --> 00:15:29,123
I'M GONNA
FALL.
332
00:15:29,125 --> 00:15:30,624
IT'S A WASTE OF TIME
AND MONEY.
333
00:15:30,626 --> 00:15:32,092
YOU KNOW WHAT?
IT'S A NUMBERS GAME.
334
00:15:32,094 --> 00:15:35,862
SEE, THE MARKET IS SATURATED
IN SINGLE, SLUTTY GIRLS,
335
00:15:35,864 --> 00:15:37,898
AND IT'S A BUYER'S MARKET.
336
00:15:37,900 --> 00:15:39,632
HEY, LANCE, DO YOU HAVE
A MINUTE?
337
00:15:39,634 --> 00:15:41,100
ACTUALLY NO, WE'RE IN
A BOARD MEETING,
338
00:15:41,102 --> 00:15:45,503
- IT'S KINDA PRIVATE.
- OH, YOU DON'T REMEMBER ME?
339
00:15:45,505 --> 00:15:47,106
WELL, DO I KNOW YOU?
340
00:15:47,108 --> 00:15:50,541
UH, YEAH,
WE SLEPT TOGETHER.
341
00:15:50,543 --> 00:15:53,177
- UM...
- YOU NEVER CALLED.
342
00:15:53,179 --> 00:15:55,747
[CHUCKLES]
I WILL CALL YOU.
343
00:15:55,749 --> 00:15:57,514
I PROMISE, I WILL CALL YOU.
344
00:15:57,516 --> 00:15:59,850
OKAY?
345
00:15:59,852 --> 00:16:00,918
BYE.
346
00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:04,821
HE IS NOT GONNA CALL YOU.
347
00:16:04,823 --> 00:16:07,090
SO WHAT WOULD YOU GUYS SAY
IS THE BEST HOOK-UP APP?
348
00:16:07,092 --> 00:16:09,659
UM...
349
00:16:09,661 --> 00:16:12,195
WELL, I GUESS THE PERFECT APP
HASN'T EVEN BEEN CREATED YET.
350
00:16:12,197 --> 00:16:14,630
- WHOA.
- HELLO.
351
00:16:14,632 --> 00:16:17,499
YEAH, BUT WHAT FEATURES
DO YOU THINK WE NEED?
352
00:16:17,501 --> 00:16:20,269
YOU KNOW, IT WOULD HAVE
A GIRL AIRLIFTED OUT OF MY BED
353
00:16:20,271 --> 00:16:22,238
- THE SECOND I'M FINISHED WITH HER.
- OOH!
354
00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:25,840
YIKES, I DON'T THINK TELEPORTATION
EXISTS YET, LANCE, SO...
355
00:16:25,842 --> 00:16:27,842
I WAS BEING THEORETICAL.
356
00:16:27,844 --> 00:16:29,510
YEAH, THEORETICAL.
357
00:16:29,512 --> 00:16:32,613
YOU KNOW, IT WOULD HAVE TO
MAKE SURE THAT A GIRL
358
00:16:32,615 --> 00:16:34,648
COULDN'T FIND ME AFTER,
YOU KNOW?
359
00:16:34,650 --> 00:16:35,983
OR EVEN IF
SHE WANTED TO FIND ME
360
00:16:35,985 --> 00:16:38,518
SHE WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO
BECAUSE THE INFORMATION
361
00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:41,088
WOULD GET LOST OR MAYBE
IT WOULD JUST MORPH MY ACCOUNT
362
00:16:41,090 --> 00:16:42,789
INTO SOME OTHER ACCOUNT.
363
00:16:42,791 --> 00:16:44,557
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, NO, NO,
I GET WHAT YOU MEAN,
364
00:16:44,559 --> 00:16:47,560
LIKE, YOU COULD MIX UP
OUR IDENTITY OR SOMETHING.
365
00:16:47,562 --> 00:16:50,096
YEAH, IT'S PRETTY MUCH EXACTLY
WHAT I JUST SAID.
366
00:16:50,098 --> 00:16:52,265
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
367
00:16:52,267 --> 00:16:54,766
WHY DON'T WE JUST CREATE
AN APP LIKE THAT.
368
00:16:54,768 --> 00:16:58,236
OH, YOU KNOW HOW TO CODE?
369
00:16:58,238 --> 00:17:00,538
BUT WE'RE TAKING A COMPUTER
SCIENCE CLASS,
370
00:17:00,540 --> 00:17:02,040
WE CAN LEARN.
371
00:17:02,042 --> 00:17:04,642
NO, WE CAN'T. NOT TO DO
SOMETHING THAT SOPHISTICATED.
372
00:17:04,644 --> 00:17:06,043
WE DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND
THE BOOK.
373
00:17:06,045 --> 00:17:08,948
YEAH, WE CAN'T EVEN UNDERSTAND
THE SYLLABUS.
374
00:17:14,619 --> 00:17:16,320
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
375
00:17:16,322 --> 00:17:18,154
DISRUPTION IS NOT AN APP.
376
00:17:18,156 --> 00:17:20,056
DISRUPTION IS NOT GADGET.
377
00:17:20,058 --> 00:17:22,624
DISRUPTION IS NOT
A BUSINESS MODEL.
378
00:17:22,626 --> 00:17:26,895
DISRUPTION IS CATACLYSMIC CHANGE
IN HUMAN BEHAVIOR
379
00:17:26,897 --> 00:17:29,231
BROUGHT ON BY CONSENSUS.
380
00:17:29,233 --> 00:17:31,233
I'M NOT DOING THE HOMEWORK,
I'M JUST READING THE BOOK.
381
00:17:31,235 --> 00:17:32,968
YOU DIDN'T SAY I COULDN'T
READ THE BOOK, IS THAT OKAY?
382
00:17:32,970 --> 00:17:36,037
RELAX.
WHAT'S THE NAME OF THE BOOK?
383
00:17:36,039 --> 00:17:38,006
IT'S ON THE SYLLABUS.
384
00:17:38,008 --> 00:17:40,241
IT'S "PROGRAMMING SOCIAL
ENGAGEMENT PLATFORMS."
385
00:17:40,243 --> 00:17:42,110
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
386
00:17:42,112 --> 00:17:43,910
- YOU'RE KIDDING.
- I NEVER KID.
387
00:17:43,912 --> 00:17:45,746
WELL, I THINK THAT MIGHT
BE A PROBLEM, JAMES.
388
00:17:45,748 --> 00:17:47,281
- HEY, THAT'S MINE.
- WELL, IT'S A NICE PHONE CASE.
389
00:17:47,283 --> 00:17:49,583
- THANK YOU.
- IT'S BIRDS.
390
00:17:49,585 --> 00:17:51,885
- MM-HMM.
- IS THE BOOK HARD?
391
00:17:51,887 --> 00:17:52,886
I'VE READ IT BEFORE.
392
00:17:52,888 --> 00:17:53,987
I MEAN THE ORIGINAL EDITION.
393
00:17:53,989 --> 00:17:55,755
WHAT, IN THE PAST TWO WEEKS?
394
00:17:55,757 --> 00:17:57,226
NO, WHEN I WAS
IN SIXTH GRADE.
395
00:17:59,127 --> 00:18:01,260
HOW LONG HAVE YOU
BEEN CODING FOR?
396
00:18:01,262 --> 00:18:05,697
- SINCE I WAS SEVEN.
- HMM.
397
00:18:05,699 --> 00:18:06,698
HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
398
00:18:06,700 --> 00:18:08,767
OH, YOU'VE BEEN PROMOTED.
399
00:18:08,769 --> 00:18:10,869
YOU'RE INVITED
TO MY BOARD MEETING.
400
00:18:10,871 --> 00:18:12,072
COME ON, GRAB YOUR STUFF.
401
00:18:17,109 --> 00:18:19,344
GRAB A CHAIR.
402
00:18:19,346 --> 00:18:21,045
WHOA, OKAY.
403
00:18:21,047 --> 00:18:24,614
ALL RIGHT, UH, DANIEL, WESLEY,
YOU REMEMBER JAMES.
404
00:18:24,616 --> 00:18:26,383
JAMES, THIS IS DANIEL
AND WESLEY.
405
00:18:26,385 --> 00:18:27,984
- WHAT'S UP?
- HOW'S IT GOING, BUDDY?
406
00:18:27,986 --> 00:18:29,886
OKAY, IF THIS IS
ABOUT COMPUTER SCIENCE,
407
00:18:29,888 --> 00:18:31,621
I'M JUST GONNA SAY,
408
00:18:31,623 --> 00:18:33,990
MAYBE WE SHOULD ALL DO
THE HOMEWORK, I'M JUST SAYING.
409
00:18:33,992 --> 00:18:36,725
UH, YOU HAVEN'T QUITE GOTTEN
TO VOTING STATUS YET,
410
00:18:36,727 --> 00:18:40,396
SO FOR RIGHT NOW
YOU'RE JUST CONSULTANT, OKAY?
411
00:18:40,398 --> 00:18:41,897
OF COURSE, YEAH.
412
00:18:41,899 --> 00:18:43,665
- SO, I HAVE AN IDEA.
- WHOA!
413
00:18:43,667 --> 00:18:45,033
- HEY.
- WE HAVE AN IDEA,
414
00:18:45,035 --> 00:18:47,802
AND WE WOULD LIKE
TO HIRE YOU.
415
00:18:47,804 --> 00:18:50,137
TO DO WHAT?
416
00:18:50,139 --> 00:18:51,338
TO BUILD AN APP.
417
00:18:51,340 --> 00:18:52,973
WE NEED TO INTERVIEW HIM
FIRST
418
00:18:52,975 --> 00:18:54,707
BEFORE WE GIVE HIM ANY JOB.
419
00:18:54,709 --> 00:18:56,243
TRUE, TRUE.
420
00:18:56,245 --> 00:18:57,911
HAVE YOU EVER BUILT
AN APP BEFORE?
421
00:18:57,913 --> 00:18:59,079
YES.
422
00:18:59,081 --> 00:19:00,713
OKAY, WELL,
TELL US ABOUT IT.
423
00:19:00,715 --> 00:19:03,650
- WHICH ONE?
- WHOA, WHOA! WHICH ONE?
424
00:19:03,652 --> 00:19:05,151
LIKE THERE'S MULTIPLE APPS
THAT YOU'VE MADE?
425
00:19:05,153 --> 00:19:09,755
UH, WELL, YEAH,
I'VE BUILT 17 FOR IOS,
426
00:19:09,757 --> 00:19:11,156
AND 12 FOR ANDROID.
427
00:19:11,158 --> 00:19:13,125
OKAY, SO WHAT DO THEY DO?
428
00:19:13,127 --> 00:19:17,229
UH, OKAY, WELL, ONE OF THEM LEAD
HOMELESS PEOPLE TO SHELTERS,
429
00:19:17,231 --> 00:19:18,930
ANOTHER ONE ASSISTED
THE BLIND,
430
00:19:18,932 --> 00:19:21,333
UH, ONE PUBLIC
THOROUGH FARES,
431
00:19:21,335 --> 00:19:24,368
ANOTHER ONE HOSTED
LOCAL FOOD DRIVES, UM...
432
00:19:24,370 --> 00:19:27,171
OKAY, WELL, IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO
DO SOMETHING THAT'S IMPORTANT.
433
00:19:27,173 --> 00:19:30,674
HEY, CAN YOU GUYS BELIEVE THAT
THIS GENIUS IS MY ROOMMATE?
434
00:19:30,676 --> 00:19:31,975
I MEAN, HOW PERFECT IS THAT?
435
00:19:31,977 --> 00:19:33,110
OOH-HOO-HOO-HOO!
THIS IS PERFECT.
436
00:19:33,112 --> 00:19:34,711
MM-HMM, I LOVE IT.
437
00:19:34,713 --> 00:19:38,348
JAMES, YOU ARE GOING TO BUILD
ONE MORE APP,
438
00:19:38,350 --> 00:19:41,184
AND THIS APP WILL TAKE
THE WORLD BY STORM.
439
00:19:41,186 --> 00:19:42,818
WELL, WHAT'S IT GONNA DO?
440
00:19:42,820 --> 00:19:43,819
JAMES, IT'S QUITE SIMPLE.
441
00:19:43,821 --> 00:19:45,321
WE TAKE MEN AND WOMEN
442
00:19:45,323 --> 00:19:47,755
AND WE PUT THEM TOGETHER
SO THEY CAN MEET UP.
443
00:19:47,757 --> 00:19:49,691
- SO, A DATING APP.
- NOT A DATING APP.
444
00:19:49,693 --> 00:19:51,793
[CHUCKLES]
HOOK-UPS.
445
00:19:51,795 --> 00:19:53,194
THERE'S ALREADY HOOK-UP APPS
OUT THERE.
446
00:19:53,196 --> 00:19:55,763
NO, BUT NOT LIKE THIS ONE.
447
00:19:55,765 --> 00:19:57,198
WHAT'S SO DIFFERENT
ABOUT THIS ONE?
448
00:19:57,200 --> 00:20:00,734
THE DIFFERENCE IS THAT TO BE
ON THIS APP,
449
00:20:00,736 --> 00:20:02,970
YOU HAVE TO AGREE TO CERTAIN
TERMS AND CONDITIONS
450
00:20:02,972 --> 00:20:04,805
THAT WILL MAKE SURE
THAT YOU, ONE,
451
00:20:04,807 --> 00:20:06,206
DO NOT ASK FOR NAMES,
452
00:20:06,208 --> 00:20:09,042
TWO, YOU WILL NOT ASK
TO SEE THE PERSON AGAIN,
453
00:20:09,044 --> 00:20:12,712
AND, THREE, BY NO MEANS,
UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE,
454
00:20:12,714 --> 00:20:15,281
WILL YOU DATE
ANYBODY ON THE APP.
455
00:20:15,283 --> 00:20:17,083
AND THAT MEANS THAT ALL
THE GUYS ARE GONNA BE ON IT.
456
00:20:17,085 --> 00:20:18,484
AND ALL THE GIRLS ARE GONNA
HAVE TO BE ON IT
457
00:20:18,486 --> 00:20:21,887
IF THEY WANT TO BE WITH ANYONE.
MM-HMM.
458
00:20:21,889 --> 00:20:25,157
OKAY, WHAT'S SO WRONG
WITH A GIRL KNOWING YOUR NAME,
459
00:20:25,159 --> 00:20:26,158
OR EVEN WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE?
460
00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:28,393
- [LAUGHTER]
- WHAT'S SO BAD?
461
00:20:28,395 --> 00:20:29,827
WELL, I GUESS THAT'S
FOR ME TO KNOW
462
00:20:29,829 --> 00:20:31,697
AND YOU TO FIGURE OUT
HOW TO CODE.
463
00:20:35,469 --> 00:20:38,135
DO YOU THINK...
464
00:20:38,137 --> 00:20:41,405
ALL THE GIRLS WILL BE
ON THE APP?
465
00:20:41,407 --> 00:20:44,040
OH, OKAY.
SO HE DOES LIKE GIRLS.
466
00:20:44,042 --> 00:20:45,442
PAY UP.
467
00:20:45,444 --> 00:20:46,776
DUDE, I'M NOT GAY.
468
00:20:46,778 --> 00:20:48,978
I DO... I LIKE ONE GIRL.
469
00:20:48,980 --> 00:20:50,213
I'M NOT SAYING WHO IT IS.
470
00:20:50,215 --> 00:20:53,116
STICK AROUND, OKAY?
LISTEN TO ME,
471
00:20:53,118 --> 00:20:57,920
AND SHE'LL BE EATING
OUT OF THE PALM OF YOUR HAND.
472
00:20:57,922 --> 00:20:59,888
WHOA, WHOA, JAMES, JAMES,
COME ON.
473
00:20:59,890 --> 00:21:01,423
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
COME BACK.
474
00:21:01,425 --> 00:21:02,725
I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.
475
00:21:05,195 --> 00:21:06,495
SO IT'S A MAYBE.
476
00:21:06,497 --> 00:21:09,363
OKAY, FINE, WELL,
YOU WON FAIR AND SQUARE.
477
00:21:09,365 --> 00:21:11,532
PAY UP.
478
00:21:11,534 --> 00:21:13,234
[JAMES]
SO, HOW WAS THE HONEYMOON?
479
00:21:13,236 --> 00:21:15,436
[PHIL]
IT WAS THE BEST ONE YET.
480
00:21:15,438 --> 00:21:17,471
IT WAS ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS,
JAMES.
481
00:21:17,473 --> 00:21:20,273
I TOLD HER,
"JUST BRING A PASSPORT."
482
00:21:20,275 --> 00:21:24,277
YOU KNOW, AN ANNUAL HONEYMOON
WOULD SAVE ANY MARRIAGE.
483
00:21:24,279 --> 00:21:26,779
I WISH YOU AND LEAH WOULD HAVE
TRIED IT, HONEY.
484
00:21:26,781 --> 00:21:29,915
[SCOFFS] THANKS FOR
THE EARLY WARNING, MOM.
485
00:21:29,917 --> 00:21:32,817
UH, JAMES, HAVE YOU
MET ANYONE YET?
486
00:21:32,819 --> 00:21:34,986
YEAH, I'VE MET A LOT
OF PEOPLE.
487
00:21:34,988 --> 00:21:36,422
ANY GIRLS?
488
00:21:36,424 --> 00:21:39,525
NO, DAD, I'M TRYING TO FOCUS
ON MY STUDIES.
489
00:21:39,527 --> 00:21:42,093
I'M GONNA ASK
FOR A PATERNITY TEST.
490
00:21:42,095 --> 00:21:44,529
HEY, I SHOULD ASK
FOR A PATERNITY TEST.
491
00:21:44,531 --> 00:21:47,197
- OUCH!
- VERY FAMILIAR WITH THE GARDENER.
492
00:21:47,199 --> 00:21:49,099
- OH, PHIL.
- DAD, I WAS ONLY KIDDING.
493
00:21:49,101 --> 00:21:50,801
ME TOO, ME TOO.
494
00:21:50,803 --> 00:21:54,870
JAMES, IF YOU WANT ANY
ADVICE ABOUT THE FAIRER SEX,
495
00:21:54,872 --> 00:21:56,973
YOU SHOULD ASK
YOUR GRANDFATHER.
496
00:21:56,975 --> 00:21:59,242
THEY DON'T ACT MUCH FAIRER.
497
00:21:59,244 --> 00:22:03,579
YOU'RE NOT BECOMING
AN ANTI-FEMINIST, ARE YOU JAMES?
498
00:22:03,581 --> 00:22:06,047
I DON'T KNOW GRANDPA, I'M
STILL STUDYING THE SITUATION.
499
00:22:06,049 --> 00:22:08,317
DAD, I DON'T THINK YOUR
ROMANTIC ADVICE PERTAINS
500
00:22:08,319 --> 00:22:09,851
TO JAMES' GENERATION.
501
00:22:09,853 --> 00:22:11,052
THEY'RE DOING EVERYTHING
ON THEIR PHONE NOW.
502
00:22:11,054 --> 00:22:12,387
THAT I'D LIKE TO SEE.
503
00:22:12,389 --> 00:22:14,222
I MEAN, THAT'S HOW
THEY MEET EACH OTHER.
504
00:22:14,224 --> 00:22:16,824
AND HOOK-UP WITH EACH OTHER
AND BREAK-UP WITH EACH OTHER.
505
00:22:16,826 --> 00:22:18,859
I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU SAY,
WOMEN AND MEN
506
00:22:18,861 --> 00:22:20,995
HAVE NOT CHANGED
FOR 10,000 YEARS.
507
00:22:20,997 --> 00:22:23,097
PHIL...
[CLEARS THROAT]
508
00:22:23,099 --> 00:22:26,200
...I'M NOT SO SURE
ABOUT THAT.
509
00:22:26,202 --> 00:22:28,103
HMM, MAYBE A LITTLE BIT.
510
00:22:40,047 --> 00:22:42,149
[ATM BEEPS]
511
00:22:43,617 --> 00:22:45,284
WHAT?
IS THE WELL DRY?
512
00:22:45,286 --> 00:22:48,553
NO, I JUST HAVE TO WAIT
FOR MY DAD'S CHECK TO CLEAR.
513
00:22:48,555 --> 00:22:50,087
YOU THINK ABOUT MY OFFER?
514
00:22:50,089 --> 00:22:51,322
- TO MAKE THE HOOK-UP APP?
- MM-HMM.
515
00:22:51,324 --> 00:22:53,057
YEAH, AND THE ANSWER IS NO,
OKAY?
516
00:22:53,059 --> 00:22:55,126
THAT'S THE LAST THING
THAT I WANT TO DO.
517
00:22:55,128 --> 00:22:58,095
MAYBE YOU'RE NOT
THE RIGHT GUY FOR IT ANYWAY.
518
00:22:58,097 --> 00:23:00,464
I MEAN,
IF YOU WERE SO SMART,
519
00:23:00,466 --> 00:23:03,233
YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN ACCEPTED
TO PRINCETON OR M.I.T.,
520
00:23:03,235 --> 00:23:04,968
OR MAYBE EVEN HARVARD,
RIGHT?
521
00:23:04,970 --> 00:23:07,404
I GOT INTO PRINCETON,
M.I.T., HARVARD, AND STANFORD.
522
00:23:07,406 --> 00:23:09,071
OH, YEAH,
THEN WHY AREN'T YOU THERE?
523
00:23:09,073 --> 00:23:11,441
BECAUSE...
524
00:23:11,443 --> 00:23:13,110
MY PARENTS DON'T HAVE
THE MONEY.
525
00:23:15,513 --> 00:23:17,613
YEAH, WELL IF YOU WERE
SO SMART,
526
00:23:17,615 --> 00:23:20,249
I'M SURE YOU'D HAVE
A SCHOLARSHIP, RIGHT?
527
00:23:20,251 --> 00:23:22,050
THE IVYS DON'T GIVE
ACADEMIC SCHOLARSHIPS
528
00:23:22,052 --> 00:23:23,519
AND WITH MY FAMILY'S BUSINESS,
IT JUST...
529
00:23:23,521 --> 00:23:24,919
YOU KNOW WHAT?
NEVER MIND.
530
00:23:24,921 --> 00:23:26,554
JAMES, I AM
YOUR SAVING GRACE.
531
00:23:26,556 --> 00:23:29,324
I MEAN, IF YOU DO THIS APP,
I WILL GIVE YOU ALL THE MONEY
532
00:23:29,326 --> 00:23:32,292
TO GO TO WHEREVER YOU WANT
TO GO FOR SCHOOLING.
533
00:23:32,294 --> 00:23:33,894
THINK ABOUT IT.
534
00:23:33,896 --> 00:23:36,897
YOU'LL BE LIKE STEVE JOBS
OR STEVE WOZNIAK.
535
00:23:36,899 --> 00:23:38,265
BILL GATES
AND PAUL ALLEN.
536
00:23:38,267 --> 00:23:40,966
MATT DAMON
AND BEN AFFLECK.
537
00:23:40,968 --> 00:23:43,938
LET ME KNOW.
OKAY?
538
00:23:48,376 --> 00:23:52,977
SO, UH, WHAT TIME
IS YOUR NEXT CLASS?
539
00:23:52,979 --> 00:23:54,379
AN HOUR.
540
00:23:54,381 --> 00:23:56,047
YEAH?
541
00:23:56,049 --> 00:23:57,916
I NEED MY DESK
AND MY CHAIR.
542
00:23:57,918 --> 00:24:00,085
WELL, THIS ISN'T GONNA
TAKE LONG, RIGHT? IT'S QUICK.
543
00:24:00,087 --> 00:24:01,653
WELL I NEED IT NOW
IF YOU WANT MY HELP.
544
00:24:01,655 --> 00:24:04,955
WAIT, HOLD ON,
YOU DECIDED TO DO IT?
545
00:24:04,957 --> 00:24:06,056
WELL,
THERE ARE CONDITIONS.
546
00:24:06,058 --> 00:24:07,925
LIKE, NO GIRLS,
NO PARTIES,
547
00:24:07,927 --> 00:24:09,960
NO STAYING UP
UNTIL 3:00 AM WITH FRIENDS.
548
00:24:09,962 --> 00:24:11,395
THIS WILL BECOME
A CODING SANCTUARY.
549
00:24:11,397 --> 00:24:13,062
OH, NO, NO, NO.
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!
550
00:24:13,064 --> 00:24:15,566
WHY CAN'T YOU JUST CODE
IN THE STUDY ROOM DOWN THE HALL?
551
00:24:15,568 --> 00:24:18,101
- NO.
- WELL, I NEED MY ROOM, DUDE.
552
00:24:18,103 --> 00:24:20,269
WELL, I NEED MY ROOM.
553
00:24:20,271 --> 00:24:23,071
OKAY, WAIT!
YES, YES, YEAH, YEAH,
554
00:24:23,073 --> 00:24:25,209
YOU CAN CODE IN HERE.
555
00:24:28,011 --> 00:24:29,311
WILL YOU ALSO
MAKE ME BREAKFAST?
556
00:24:29,313 --> 00:24:32,481
NO, I WILL NOT MAKE YOU
BREAKFAST, JAMES.
557
00:24:32,483 --> 00:24:36,250
BUT SHE SERIOUSLY DOES
HAVE TO GO.
558
00:24:36,252 --> 00:24:38,052
YEAH, OKAY,
YOU HEARD THE MAN.
559
00:24:38,054 --> 00:24:40,054
TIME TO SKEDADDLE,
GET OUT.
560
00:24:40,056 --> 00:24:42,022
- WILL YOU CALL ME LATER?
- PROBABLY NOT.
561
00:24:42,024 --> 00:24:43,357
HE WON'T.
562
00:24:43,359 --> 00:24:45,225
OKAY, I'LL COME BY
AFTER CLASS.
563
00:24:45,227 --> 00:24:47,661
NO, NO, NO, JAMES AND I
HAVE VERY IMPORTANT WORK TO DO
564
00:24:47,663 --> 00:24:50,397
AND WE NEED PEACE AND QUIET,
BUT, THANK YOU.
565
00:24:50,399 --> 00:24:52,167
SERIOUSLY.
566
00:24:54,068 --> 00:24:55,735
I HAVE ONE MORE CONDITION.
567
00:24:55,737 --> 00:24:58,070
I ALREADY TOLD YOU, I'M NOT
MAKING BREAKFAST FOR YOU IN BED.
568
00:24:58,072 --> 00:25:00,606
IT'S NOT THAT.
I WANT TO DO THIS ANONYMOUSLY.
569
00:25:00,608 --> 00:25:02,441
WELL, THEN WHO IS GONNA
TAKE THE CREDIT
570
00:25:02,443 --> 00:25:04,008
FOR DEVELOPING THE APP?
571
00:25:04,010 --> 00:25:05,677
WELL, CONSIDERING
I HAVE NOT BEEN ACCORDED
572
00:25:05,679 --> 00:25:07,278
VOTING RIGHTS, STILL.
573
00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:09,213
I WOULD SAY, YOU WOULD
TAKE THE CREDIT.
574
00:25:09,215 --> 00:25:10,214
WHO? ME?
575
00:25:10,216 --> 00:25:12,016
- YEAH, YOU.
- WHY?
576
00:25:12,018 --> 00:25:14,318
BECAUSE I DON'T WANT PEOPLE
TO KNOW I'M A PART OF THIS.
577
00:25:14,320 --> 00:25:15,720
WHAT PEOPLE
DON'T YOU WANT TO KNOW
578
00:25:15,722 --> 00:25:17,020
THAT YOU'RE A PART
OF THIS APP?
579
00:25:17,022 --> 00:25:18,455
MY MOTHER, FOR ONE.
580
00:25:18,457 --> 00:25:20,290
OH!
[LAUGHS]
581
00:25:20,292 --> 00:25:22,726
WAIT, WE CAN'T TELL MOMMY?
WHY NOT?
582
00:25:22,728 --> 00:25:24,728
OKAY, DO YOU WANT MY HELP
OR NOT?
583
00:25:24,730 --> 00:25:26,663
YEAH, NO, YEAH,
OBVIOUSLY.
584
00:25:26,665 --> 00:25:28,232
THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT.
585
00:25:31,536 --> 00:25:32,570
LET'S GET STARTED.
586
00:25:36,307 --> 00:25:37,440
[LAUGHTER]
587
00:25:37,442 --> 00:25:39,608
I FELT LIKE IT WAS
A BAPTISM.
588
00:25:39,610 --> 00:25:40,608
[LAUGHTER]
589
00:25:40,610 --> 00:25:42,210
HEY, WHERE'VE YOU GUYS BEEN?
590
00:25:42,212 --> 00:25:44,546
OH, UH...
WE'VE BEEN STUDYING.
591
00:25:44,548 --> 00:25:45,747
FOR REAL?
592
00:25:45,749 --> 00:25:48,115
UH-HUH.
YEAH, WE'RE ACTUALLY CODING
593
00:25:48,117 --> 00:25:50,451
A NEW BREAKTHROUGH PROJECT.
594
00:25:50,453 --> 00:25:51,618
MM-HMM, AND IT'LL BE OUT SOON,
LADIES, SO DON'T FRET.
595
00:25:51,620 --> 00:25:53,287
THAT SOUNDS COOL,
WHAT IS IT?
596
00:25:53,289 --> 00:25:55,556
OH, NO, IT'S...
WE HAVEN'T MADE IT PUBLIC YET.
597
00:25:55,558 --> 00:25:57,691
[SCOFFS]
WHAT LANGUAGE IS IT IN?
598
00:25:57,693 --> 00:26:02,028
- [LAUGHS] WHAT...
- TELL HER.
599
00:26:02,030 --> 00:26:04,330
- ENGLISH.
- YEAH, ENGLISH.
600
00:26:04,332 --> 00:26:05,598
SHE MEANT WHAT
PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE.
601
00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:07,400
YEAH, WE KNOW WHAT YOU MEANT,
WE'RE NOT GONNA TELL YOU THAT,
602
00:26:07,402 --> 00:26:09,067
OKAY?
IT'S PRIVATE.
603
00:26:09,069 --> 00:26:10,538
WE'RE GONNA KEEP IT UNDER WRAPS
FOR A LITTLE WHILE.
604
00:26:18,110 --> 00:26:20,177
[MUSIC PLAYING]
605
00:26:20,179 --> 00:26:25,716
UH, JAMES...
WHAT IS THIS?
606
00:26:25,718 --> 00:26:27,518
YOU WERE LATE
FOR OUR MEETING.
607
00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:29,720
- WHERE IS THE TV?
- IT'S IN THE CLOSET.
608
00:26:29,722 --> 00:26:32,255
- WHAT ABOUT MY FUTON?
- DEFLATED, FOLDED NEATLY,
609
00:26:32,257 --> 00:26:34,324
- AND TUCKED UNDER THE BED.
- WHAT? NO, DUDE!
610
00:26:34,326 --> 00:26:36,359
I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT
MY FUTON.
611
00:26:36,361 --> 00:26:38,428
AND I CAN'T CODE ANONYMOUSLY
EXCEPT FOR IN THIS ROOM,
612
00:26:38,430 --> 00:26:39,429
AND I CAN'T CODE AT ALL
613
00:26:39,431 --> 00:26:41,733
UNLESS THIS IS MY SANCTUARY.
614
00:26:44,435 --> 00:26:48,136
[SIGHS] OKAY, THEN WHAT
AM I SUPPOSED TO DO HERE?
615
00:26:48,138 --> 00:26:49,505
I'D LIKE A TURKEY
AND SWISS ON RYE
616
00:26:49,507 --> 00:26:51,640
WITH LETTUCE, TOMATO,
AND MAYONNAISE, PLEASE.
617
00:26:51,642 --> 00:26:53,775
OH, AND BY THE WAY, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT YOU WANTED ME TO DO WITH THIS.
618
00:26:53,777 --> 00:26:55,443
THAT'S PERFECT RIGHT THERE,
619
00:26:55,445 --> 00:26:57,111
AND I AM NOT GONNA
BE YOUR WAITER.
620
00:26:57,113 --> 00:26:59,447
- DUDE.
- WAIT... OKAY, FINE!
621
00:26:59,449 --> 00:27:02,650
UNLESS IT KEEPS YOU
FROM CODING, SIT DOWN.
622
00:27:02,652 --> 00:27:05,218
DO YOUR THING.
623
00:27:05,220 --> 00:27:09,189
[SHARP EXHALE] UH, AND WHAT
LANGUAGE ARE WE DOING THIS IN?
624
00:27:09,191 --> 00:27:11,190
ENGLISH.
625
00:27:11,192 --> 00:27:13,860
NO, I MEANT LIKE
THE PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE.
626
00:27:13,862 --> 00:27:16,095
- I KNOW WHAT YOU MEANT.
- OH, WAS IT A JOKE?
627
00:27:16,097 --> 00:27:18,631
- WAS IT FUNNY?
- NO.
628
00:27:18,633 --> 00:27:21,534
DON'T TRY IT AGAIN, 'CAUSE FUNNY
STUFF DOESN'T WORK FOR YOU, OKAY?
629
00:27:21,536 --> 00:27:23,368
OKAY, I'M SORRY,
I WON'T DO IT AGAIN.
630
00:27:23,370 --> 00:27:26,538
DUDE, WHAT'S THE PROGRAMMING?
I NEED TO BE ABLE TO TELL PEOPLE
631
00:27:26,540 --> 00:27:27,672
WHAT WE'RE DOING IN HERE.
632
00:27:27,674 --> 00:27:29,407
C, JAVA, HTML,
AND RUBY.
633
00:27:29,409 --> 00:27:31,242
[COUGHS AND SNEEZES]
634
00:27:31,244 --> 00:27:35,212
OH, DON'T YOU DARE EVEN THINK
ABOUT GETTING SICK ON ME, OKAY?
635
00:27:35,214 --> 00:27:38,515
- OKAY.
- JUST PUT THAT ON.
636
00:27:38,517 --> 00:27:41,117
WHEN AM I GETTING PAID?
637
00:27:41,119 --> 00:27:43,252
IN TIME FOR YOU
TO ENROLL AT M.I.T.
638
00:27:43,254 --> 00:27:44,521
THE DEADLINE
IS FEBRUARY FIRST.
639
00:27:44,523 --> 00:27:48,257
I GUESS
YOU BETTER GET STARTED.
640
00:27:48,259 --> 00:27:50,560
ALL RIGHT GUYS, SO, UH,
I THINK IT'S TIME
641
00:27:50,562 --> 00:27:52,228
FOR A LITTLE POP QUIZ
642
00:27:52,230 --> 00:27:54,129
JUST TO MAKE SURE YOU'RE CAUGHT
UP IN ALL YOUR READING.
643
00:27:54,131 --> 00:27:58,199
HEY, UH, TEACH. YEAH,
I'D LIKE TO BE EXEMPT
644
00:27:58,201 --> 00:28:00,435
- FROM SAID POP QUIZ.
- [PROFESSOR] ON WHAT GROUNDS?
645
00:28:00,437 --> 00:28:02,136
ON THE GROUNDS THAT
I'M DEVELOPING A REAL APP
646
00:28:02,138 --> 00:28:03,705
THAT NEEDS MY TIME.
647
00:28:03,707 --> 00:28:07,174
I MEAN, I THINK THAT YOU'D FIND
THAT IT MORE THAN FULFILLS
648
00:28:07,176 --> 00:28:09,476
THE COURSE REQUIREMENTS.
649
00:28:09,478 --> 00:28:11,278
[PROFESSOR]
COME OVER HERE, LANCE.
650
00:28:11,280 --> 00:28:14,815
COME ON, I WON'T BITE YA,
COME ON.
651
00:28:14,817 --> 00:28:17,250
I THINK YOU SHOULD JUST
SHARE WITH THE CLASS
652
00:28:17,252 --> 00:28:19,319
DETAILS ABOUT YOUR PROJECT,
HM?
653
00:28:19,321 --> 00:28:20,620
- YOU KNOW, I WOULD...
- OH.
654
00:28:20,622 --> 00:28:23,256
I REALLY WOULD,
BUT MY CONTRACT WITH NASA
655
00:28:23,258 --> 00:28:24,757
PROHIBITS ME
FROM SAYING ANYTHING.
656
00:28:24,759 --> 00:28:26,626
GOSH, YOU KNOW,
I'M REALLY GOOD FRIENDS
657
00:28:26,628 --> 00:28:27,627
WITH THE DIRECTOR OF NASA.
658
00:28:27,629 --> 00:28:29,328
- ARE YOU?
- MM-HMM.
659
00:28:29,330 --> 00:28:32,631
OH, YEAH! WELL, WE'RE WORKING
WITH, UH, DNA. YEAH.
660
00:28:32,633 --> 00:28:34,266
[PROFESSOR]
YOU'RE WORKING ON DNA?
661
00:28:34,268 --> 00:28:37,603
NO, NO, NO. WE'RE WORKING
ON A CODING PROJECT.
662
00:28:37,605 --> 00:28:40,471
OH, SO SIGNED A NON DISCLOSURE
AGREEMENT, AN NDA.
663
00:28:40,473 --> 00:28:41,906
YEAH, AN NDA,
A NON DISCLOSURE AGREEMENT.
664
00:28:41,908 --> 00:28:43,608
- [PROFESSOR] RIGHT.
- A STANDARD ONE TOO.
665
00:28:43,610 --> 00:28:44,942
- [PROFESSOR] OH, A STANDARD.
- I APOLOGIZE FOR THEM.
666
00:28:44,944 --> 00:28:46,309
[PROFESSOR]
A STANDARD ONE, OKAY, GREAT.
667
00:28:46,311 --> 00:28:47,912
YEAH, SO THAT MEANS,
YOU KNOW,
668
00:28:47,914 --> 00:28:49,814
IF WE WERE EVER
TO SAY ANYTHING,
669
00:28:49,816 --> 00:28:51,181
WE WOULD BE...
[FEIGNS CHOKING]
670
00:28:51,183 --> 00:28:52,415
DEAD, KILLED IN OUR SLEEP.
671
00:28:52,417 --> 00:28:54,584
- AND WHO WOULD WANT THAT?
- NOT ME.
672
00:28:54,586 --> 00:28:56,218
ALL RIGHT,
BUT, YOU KNOW,
673
00:28:56,220 --> 00:28:58,554
I THINK YOU CAN SHARE
WITH THE CLASS
674
00:28:58,556 --> 00:28:59,823
WHAT LANGUAGE
YOU'RE WORKING IN.
675
00:28:59,825 --> 00:29:02,458
- OH...
- WOULD THAT BE ENGLISH, LANCE?
676
00:29:02,460 --> 00:29:03,792
- OH, YEAH?
- WOULD THAT BE ENGLISH, LANCE?
677
00:29:03,794 --> 00:29:06,562
NAH, NO. THAT WOULD NOT
BE ENGLISH.
678
00:29:06,564 --> 00:29:09,566
ACTUALLY, WE'RE WORKING IN C,
JAVA, HTML, AND RUBY, SO...
679
00:29:12,636 --> 00:29:13,935
[PROFESSOR] DOES THIS
PROJECT HAVE A NAME?
680
00:29:13,937 --> 00:29:16,236
DOES THIS PROJECT
HAVE A NAME,
681
00:29:16,238 --> 00:29:18,775
YES, IT HAS A NAME.
IT'S CALLED "JUNGLE."
682
00:29:20,877 --> 00:29:23,543
ALL RIGHT, LANCE,
I'LL EXPECT A SUMMARY
683
00:29:23,545 --> 00:29:25,479
WITH ALL PROPRIETARY
INFORMATION REDACTED, OF COURSE,
684
00:29:25,481 --> 00:29:26,913
UH, BY THE NEXT CLASS,
685
00:29:26,915 --> 00:29:29,616
AND IF I APPROVE,
THEN, FINE, YOU CAN MISS OUT
686
00:29:29,618 --> 00:29:32,218
ON A FEW QUIZZES.
687
00:29:32,220 --> 00:29:34,553
- THANK YOU.
- OKAY, AS FOR THE REST OF YOU,
688
00:29:34,555 --> 00:29:37,358
YOU WILL FIND THE QUIZ
IF YOU PRESS ENTER.
689
00:29:39,694 --> 00:29:40,793
HONEY, IT'S THIS BUTTON.
690
00:29:40,795 --> 00:29:46,531
OKAY.
GOOD BOY.
691
00:29:46,533 --> 00:29:50,568
...JAVA, HTML, RUBY,
C, JAVA, HTML...
692
00:29:50,570 --> 00:29:54,005
HOW'S IT GOING?
693
00:29:54,007 --> 00:29:55,739
THE ARCHITECTURE'S
STARTING TO FLOW.
694
00:29:55,741 --> 00:29:57,741
BY THE WAY, YOU GOTTA COME UP
WITH, UM,
695
00:29:57,743 --> 00:29:59,777
A FULL SUMMARY
OF THE PROJECT
696
00:29:59,779 --> 00:30:02,278
FOR PROFESSOR BARNES.
I GOTTA GIVE HER ONE.
697
00:30:02,280 --> 00:30:03,513
OKAY, I'LL WORK
ON THAT TOMORROW.
698
00:30:03,515 --> 00:30:04,747
[COUGHS]
699
00:30:04,749 --> 00:30:07,450
HEY, HEY! COULD YOU
HOLD IT DOWN?
700
00:30:07,452 --> 00:30:09,986
PLEASE, I'M TRYING TO REMEMBER
ALL THESE TERMS.
701
00:30:09,988 --> 00:30:10,987
I THINK I'M GETTING SICK.
702
00:30:10,989 --> 00:30:13,321
I'M GOING TO BED NOW.
703
00:30:13,323 --> 00:30:15,290
ALL RIGHT, BUT JUST,
YOU KNOW, MAKE SURE YOU GET
704
00:30:15,292 --> 00:30:16,760
RIGHT BACK TO WORK
IN THE MORNING.
705
00:30:19,530 --> 00:30:21,630
HOY! COME ON,
TIME TO GET UP.
706
00:30:21,632 --> 00:30:23,832
LET'S GO.
707
00:30:23,834 --> 00:30:25,332
COME ON.
708
00:30:25,334 --> 00:30:28,536
I CAN'T, I CAN'T.
I'VE GOT A BAD COLD.
709
00:30:28,538 --> 00:30:31,706
OH, NO, NO, NO. HOW LONG
IS THAT GONNA SET US BACK?
710
00:30:31,708 --> 00:30:34,507
[SIGHS]
LET'S SEE...
711
00:30:34,509 --> 00:30:37,644
IF IT'S JUST A COLD,
A COUPLE DAYS.
712
00:30:37,646 --> 00:30:42,314
IF IT'S A SINUS INFECTION,
IT COULD BE A COUPLE WEEKS.
713
00:30:42,316 --> 00:30:44,750
WELL... OKAY, WHAT...
OKAY THEN, WHAT DO WE HAVE TO DO
714
00:30:44,752 --> 00:30:47,753
TO MAKE SURE IT DOESN'T TURN
INTO THE INFECTION THING?
715
00:30:47,755 --> 00:30:52,658
UH, WELL, MY MOM WOULD USUALLY
MAKE ME A POT OF HOT TEA,
716
00:30:52,660 --> 00:30:53,892
ALTERNATING WITH SOME
ORANGE JUICE,
717
00:30:53,894 --> 00:30:58,796
WITH 6,000 GRAMS
OF VITAMIN C CRYSTALS.
718
00:30:58,798 --> 00:31:01,032
OH, AND SOME CHICKEN
NOODLE SOUP, OF COURSE.
719
00:31:01,034 --> 00:31:03,400
I'M NOT YOUR MOM, JAMES.
720
00:31:03,402 --> 00:31:05,803
OKAY.
721
00:31:05,805 --> 00:31:08,407
SHOULD LAST NO MORE
THAN A MONTH.
722
00:31:10,342 --> 00:31:11,577
[SIGHS]
723
00:31:18,583 --> 00:31:20,585
HEY!
724
00:31:28,059 --> 00:31:32,093
[LAUGHTER]
725
00:31:32,095 --> 00:31:33,995
LANCE! LANCE!
726
00:31:33,997 --> 00:31:35,697
UH, YEAH?
727
00:31:35,699 --> 00:31:39,333
UH, LISTEN, I JUST FINISHED
READING YOUR PROPOSAL.
728
00:31:39,335 --> 00:31:41,535
I'M REALLY IMPRESSED.
729
00:31:41,537 --> 00:31:44,772
YOU EXEMPLIFY EVERYTHING I AM
TRYING TO CULTIVATE
730
00:31:44,774 --> 00:31:46,874
IN THIS CLASS.
I'M BLOWN AWAY BECAUSE AT FIRST
731
00:31:46,876 --> 00:31:49,742
I THOUGHT, UGH!
BUT YOU'VE SURPRISED ME.
732
00:31:49,744 --> 00:31:51,644
SO I THINK I CAN AGREE
TO YOUR TERMS.
733
00:31:51,646 --> 00:31:55,681
OF COURSE, PENDING THE SUBMISSION
OF YOUR CODED PROGRAM.
734
00:31:55,683 --> 00:31:57,016
OF COURSE,
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
735
00:31:57,018 --> 00:31:59,818
ALL RIGHT.
736
00:31:59,820 --> 00:32:02,689
- NICE COSTUME.
- [WESLEY] I LIKE YOURS.
737
00:32:08,128 --> 00:32:12,129
[SCREAMS, LAUGHS]
738
00:32:12,131 --> 00:32:17,402
- YOU'RE A GENIUS, MAN!
- THEY ARE GOING TO BUILD A SHRINE TO MY GREATNESS!
739
00:32:23,975 --> 00:32:25,775
HEY!
740
00:32:25,777 --> 00:32:28,379
[JAMES] I'M WORKING,
COME BACK TOMORROW.
741
00:32:30,015 --> 00:32:33,415
YES, YES, HE'S WORKING
ON GETTING "JUNGLE" RIGHT NOW,
742
00:32:33,417 --> 00:32:35,753
I HAVE EVERYTHING
UNDER CONTROL.
743
00:32:40,857 --> 00:32:42,890
[JAMES] OKAY.
744
00:32:42,892 --> 00:32:47,061
I THINK "JUNGLE" IS OFFICIALLY
READY FOR BETA ROLL OUT.
745
00:32:47,063 --> 00:32:49,531
- WHAT? REALLY?
- YEAH.
746
00:32:56,939 --> 00:32:59,505
[LANCE] AH, DUDE.
747
00:32:59,507 --> 00:33:01,874
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I WAS THINKING ABOUT THIS, DUDE.
748
00:33:01,876 --> 00:33:04,643
THERE COULD BE
A SLIGHT PROBLEM, THOUGH.
749
00:33:04,645 --> 00:33:06,445
WHAT PROBLEM?
WHAT IS IT?
750
00:33:06,447 --> 00:33:09,514
UM, I MEAN THERE'S NO LOGICAL
INCENTIVE FOR THE USERS
751
00:33:09,516 --> 00:33:14,452
OF OTHER HOOK-UP APPS
TO TRANSFER OVER TO JUNGLE,
752
00:33:14,454 --> 00:33:15,954
- YOU KNOW?
- I DIDN'T THINK OF THAT.
753
00:33:15,956 --> 00:33:19,090
YEAH. I MEAN, THERE'S GOTTA BE
A MATHEMATICAL THEOREM
754
00:33:19,092 --> 00:33:21,758
TO CONVINCE THEM.
755
00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:24,095
ALL RIGHT, LADIES.
MY BOY LANCE RIGHT NOW
756
00:33:24,097 --> 00:33:25,863
IS GONNA BREAK IT DOWN
FOR Y'ALL RIGHT NOW.
757
00:33:25,865 --> 00:33:27,731
LISTEN UP, Y'ALL.
WE GOT IT ALL FIGURED OUT.
758
00:33:27,733 --> 00:33:29,132
WHAT YOU NEED TO DO,
759
00:33:29,134 --> 00:33:32,035
IS GET OFF OF ALL OF
THE OTHER MATING APPS
760
00:33:32,037 --> 00:33:33,703
AND GET ONTO JUNGLE.
761
00:33:33,705 --> 00:33:35,605
MY BOY DANIEL HERE,
HE DID ALL THE MATHEMATICS,
762
00:33:35,607 --> 00:33:36,873
HE'S GONNA BREAK IT DOWN
FOR YOU.
763
00:33:36,875 --> 00:33:38,708
IT'S ALL HERE,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
764
00:33:38,710 --> 00:33:40,176
I HAVE COME UP
WITH A SIMPLISTIC
765
00:33:40,178 --> 00:33:42,510
YET INTUITIVE
MATHEMATICAL FORMULA
766
00:33:42,512 --> 00:33:44,846
THAT WORKS 10 OUT OF 10 TIMES,
AND IT'S QUITE EASY.
767
00:33:44,848 --> 00:33:46,982
ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS DITCH
THE OTHER HOOK-UP APPS
768
00:33:46,984 --> 00:33:49,517
AND SWITCH TO "JUNGLE"
AND THE RESULTS
769
00:33:49,519 --> 00:33:51,186
WILL ASTOUND YOU,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
770
00:33:51,188 --> 00:33:53,054
- THEY WILL ASTOUND YOU.
- OH!
771
00:33:53,056 --> 00:33:54,822
- AND THIS IS WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT.
- MM-HMM.
772
00:33:54,824 --> 00:33:57,458
- WE DON'T HAVE THE TIME...
- NOPE.
773
00:33:57,460 --> 00:33:58,859
- ...TO KNOW A GIRL'S NAME.
- NOPE.
774
00:33:58,861 --> 00:34:01,561
WE DON'T THE TIME
FOR THEM TO KNOW OUR NAMES!
775
00:34:01,563 --> 00:34:03,496
- WHO DOES?
- WE GOT SCHOOL!
776
00:34:03,498 --> 00:34:04,597
DO YOU REALLY WANT
TO PAY FOR A MOVIE?
777
00:34:04,599 --> 00:34:05,598
- [ALL] NO!
- OR FLOWERS?
778
00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:07,167
[ALL] NO!
779
00:34:07,169 --> 00:34:08,868
I'M GONNA SAY THE C-WORD,
I KNOW WE DON'T LIKE TO SAY IT,
780
00:34:08,870 --> 00:34:10,069
- ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO.
- DON'T DO IT TO 'EM.
781
00:34:10,071 --> 00:34:11,971
- COMMITMENT.
- [ALL SHOUTING]
782
00:34:11,973 --> 00:34:14,140
IF YOU WANT TO HAVE GIRLS
IN YOUR APARTMENTS,
783
00:34:14,142 --> 00:34:16,142
IN YOUR DORMS,
ON A DAILY BASIS,
784
00:34:16,144 --> 00:34:18,577
LINE UP RIGHT NOW
AND GET THESE DIRECTIONS.
785
00:34:18,579 --> 00:34:19,578
[DANIEL]
ORDERLY FASHION, GENTLEMEN.
786
00:34:19,580 --> 00:34:21,113
THIS HAS NO AGE RESTRICTION.
787
00:34:21,115 --> 00:34:22,814
GIVE IT TO YOUR FIVE-YEAR-OLD
COUSIN, IF YOU NEED TO.
788
00:34:22,816 --> 00:34:24,482
OH, HAND IT TO YOUR FRIENDS,
YOUR FRIEND'S FRIEND.
789
00:34:24,484 --> 00:34:26,651
I GOT ANOTHER ONE!
GIVE IT TO YOUR FRATERNITIES,
790
00:34:26,653 --> 00:34:28,886
GIVE IT TO YOUR BROTHERS,
GIVE IT TO YOUR FRIENDS,
791
00:34:28,888 --> 00:34:30,988
YOUR FRIENDS' FRIENDS,
YOUR COUSINS, YOUR UNCLES,
792
00:34:30,990 --> 00:34:32,890
- ALL OF 'EM!
- YOU NEPHEWS, ALL OF 'EM!
793
00:34:32,892 --> 00:34:34,825
'CAUSE EVERYBODY
SHOULD BE ON JUNGLE.
794
00:34:34,827 --> 00:34:36,828
- WHOO!
- SPREAD THE WORD, Y'ALL.
795
00:34:41,233 --> 00:34:43,833
- TELL HIM ABOUT THE TIME...
- HEY!
796
00:34:43,835 --> 00:34:45,634
- WHOA.
- WE GOT A QUESTION FOR THE DUDE
797
00:34:45,636 --> 00:34:47,037
THAT DEVELOPED
THE "JUNGLE" APP.
798
00:34:47,039 --> 00:34:49,171
- YEAH.
- YO, SO, YOU TELLING ME THESE GIRLS,
799
00:34:49,173 --> 00:34:50,739
INSTEAD OF NAMES,
THEY JUST SEND
800
00:34:50,741 --> 00:34:51,840
A PHOTO OF THEMSELVES
IN THEIR UNDERWEAR?
801
00:34:51,842 --> 00:34:52,841
NO EXCEPTIONS?
802
00:34:52,843 --> 00:34:54,009
I MEAN, THAT'S THE PLATFORM.
803
00:34:54,011 --> 00:34:55,810
- OOH!
- HEY, MAN, I JUST WANTED TO SAY,
804
00:34:55,812 --> 00:34:58,213
- YOU ROCK!
- THAT'S PRETTY SWEET.
805
00:34:58,215 --> 00:34:59,981
YOU ROCK, MAN.
806
00:34:59,983 --> 00:35:03,785
HEY, WHAT ARE
YOU GUYS DOING?
807
00:35:03,787 --> 00:35:05,920
SO FAR I'VE GOTTEN
FOUR SWIPES.
808
00:35:05,922 --> 00:35:07,621
I'VE GOTTEN 19.
809
00:35:07,623 --> 00:35:09,923
I'VE GOTTEN TWO,
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
810
00:35:09,925 --> 00:35:12,159
LET ME SEE
YOUR PROFILE PICTURE?
811
00:35:12,161 --> 00:35:15,762
IT'S OBVIOUS,
YOU NEED TO STAND OUT.
812
00:35:15,764 --> 00:35:18,731
HOW DO YOU STAND OUT
IN YOUR UNDERWEAR?
813
00:35:18,733 --> 00:35:20,533
WITHOUT THEM, OF COURSE.
814
00:35:20,535 --> 00:35:21,968
[LAUGHS]
815
00:35:21,970 --> 00:35:23,736
WELL, I DIDN'T HAVE TO, BUT...
816
00:35:23,738 --> 00:35:26,138
HOW MANY DO YOU HAVE, HANNAH?
817
00:35:26,140 --> 00:35:27,173
[HANNAH] ZERO.
818
00:35:27,175 --> 00:35:29,975
OH, HANNAH.
819
00:35:29,977 --> 00:35:32,177
DO YOU NEED US TO HELP YOU
WITH YOUR PROFILE PHOTO?
820
00:35:32,179 --> 00:35:33,745
NO.
[SCOFFS]
821
00:35:33,747 --> 00:35:35,914
I'M NOT GONNA PLAY
WITH THAT APP.
822
00:35:35,916 --> 00:35:37,748
MORE GUYS FOR US.
823
00:35:37,750 --> 00:35:40,118
I JUST DON'T SEE
HOW IT BENEFITS US.
824
00:35:40,120 --> 00:35:42,886
HANNAH, DO YOU WANT TO BE
ALONE FOREVER?
825
00:35:42,888 --> 00:35:45,122
- NO.
- THEN YOU NEED TO GET ON BOARD
826
00:35:45,124 --> 00:35:47,825
AND GET WITH THE APPS.
THAT'S WHERE THE GUYS ARE.
827
00:35:47,827 --> 00:35:49,692
THAT'S TRUE.
828
00:35:49,694 --> 00:35:52,195
SO, WHO HAVE YOU MET?
829
00:35:52,197 --> 00:35:55,598
WELL, YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED
TO CALL IT MEETING ANYONE.
830
00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:58,234
BECAUSE YOU JUST HOOK-UP
WITH THEM ONE TIME.
831
00:35:58,236 --> 00:36:00,069
UNLESS THE GUY HITS
A CERTAIN BUTTON
832
00:36:00,071 --> 00:36:01,570
THAT BRINGS YOU BACK
A SECOND TIME.
833
00:36:01,572 --> 00:36:03,005
BUT YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED
TO SAY HIS NAME.
834
00:36:03,007 --> 00:36:05,974
- OR TELL HIM YOURS.
- OR ASK HIM ANY QUESTIONS.
835
00:36:05,976 --> 00:36:07,342
OR THEY'LL KICK YOU OFF
THE PLATFORM,
836
00:36:07,344 --> 00:36:08,743
AND YOU HAVE TO WAIT
TWO WEEKS
837
00:36:08,745 --> 00:36:10,078
FOR A RE-TRAINING PERIOD.
838
00:36:10,080 --> 00:36:15,249
OKAY, THAT SOUNDS VERY
LIBERATING, GIRLS,
839
00:36:15,251 --> 00:36:17,286
BUT I'M GONNA GO STUDY.
840
00:36:19,322 --> 00:36:21,621
I WORRY ABOUT HANNAH.
841
00:36:21,623 --> 00:36:23,923
SHE JUST DOESN'T GET IT,
SHE'S SO 20TH CENTURY.
842
00:36:23,925 --> 00:36:26,659
I THINK SHE'S LIKE A BORN
AGAIN CHRISTIAN OR SOMETHING.
843
00:36:26,661 --> 00:36:29,329
THAT EXPLAINS IT.
844
00:36:29,331 --> 00:36:33,166
[MUSIC PLAYING]
845
00:36:33,168 --> 00:36:37,369
THESE KIDS HAVE NO IDEA
HOW EASY THIS IS.
846
00:36:37,371 --> 00:36:42,007
"JUNGLE" HAS JUST MOVED IT UP
A WHOLE 'NOTHER LEVEL.
847
00:36:42,009 --> 00:36:46,611
I THINK YOU MEAN DOWN
A WHOLE NEW LEVEL.
848
00:36:46,613 --> 00:36:48,679
- NO.
- HEY, GUYS, GUYS,
849
00:36:48,681 --> 00:36:50,314
HOW'D YOU GUYS LEARN
ABOUT "JUNGLE?"
850
00:36:50,316 --> 00:36:53,617
- UH, MY DENTIST.
- MY ACCOUNTANT.
851
00:36:53,619 --> 00:36:56,920
GOSH! DID YOU JUST HEAR THAT?
852
00:36:56,922 --> 00:36:59,022
"JUNGLE" IS NOW OUT
OF THE CAMPUS
853
00:36:59,024 --> 00:37:01,624
AND OUT INTO THE REAL WORLD,
MY FRIEND.
854
00:37:01,626 --> 00:37:02,992
- OH, WHOO-HOO-HOO.
- THIS IS BEAUTIFUL.
855
00:37:02,994 --> 00:37:05,295
GET READY FOR SOME
MAJOR BANK.
856
00:37:05,297 --> 00:37:07,263
- INSANE.
- YOU GUYS, SERIOUSLY,
857
00:37:07,265 --> 00:37:10,066
YOU SHOULD, HOP ON "JUNGLE"
'CAUSE I WOULD LOVE TO SWIPE YOU.
858
00:37:10,068 --> 00:37:12,001
OH!
859
00:37:12,003 --> 00:37:15,304
WHO'S GOT LOW SELF-ESTEEM?
THIS GUY, LET'S GO.
860
00:37:15,306 --> 00:37:16,905
[LAUGHS]
861
00:37:16,907 --> 00:37:19,974
SERIOUSLY, SERIOUSLY,
LET'S SWIPE SOME TIME.
862
00:37:19,976 --> 00:37:22,210
I'M SENSING DISRUPTION
FORM A NEW HOOK-UP APP
863
00:37:22,212 --> 00:37:23,710
CALLED "JUNGLE."
864
00:37:23,712 --> 00:37:25,246
BUT I'M NOT GONNA
WEIGH IN ON IT YET.
865
00:37:25,248 --> 00:37:28,115
FIRST, I'M GONNA EVALUATE
THE AUTHENTICITY.
866
00:37:28,117 --> 00:37:31,285
FAKE NEWS...
867
00:37:31,287 --> 00:37:33,755
[SIGHS]
868
00:37:49,736 --> 00:37:53,038
[GIRL] SHE CALLED ME
COMPLETELY HYSTERICAL.
869
00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:56,073
[GIRL 2] LOOKS LIKE SOMEBODY
HAD A GOOD TIME ON "JUNGLE."
870
00:37:56,075 --> 00:37:57,342
THIS DOES NOT LOOK LIKE
A GOOD GUY!
871
00:37:57,344 --> 00:37:59,310
YEAH, MELODY,
THIS GUY WAS A FREAK.
872
00:37:59,312 --> 00:38:01,445
WELL, THE CUTE FREAKS
ARE ON THE APP, SO...
873
00:38:01,447 --> 00:38:05,715
I THINK WE'RE JUST GONNA
HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT.
874
00:38:05,717 --> 00:38:07,851
[CRYING]
875
00:38:07,853 --> 00:38:09,752
DO YOU GUYS THINK
LANCE MADE THE APP?
876
00:38:09,754 --> 00:38:10,920
YEAH, WHY NOT?
877
00:38:10,922 --> 00:38:12,789
'CAUSE HE'S HORRIBLE
AT CODING.
878
00:38:12,791 --> 00:38:16,326
YEAH, WELL, SOMEONE'S
HELPING HIM.
879
00:38:16,328 --> 00:38:18,361
LOOK, ALL I KNOW IS,
WHOEVER MADE THIS APP
880
00:38:18,363 --> 00:38:22,998
IS A HORRIBLE PERSON.
881
00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:24,933
THANK YOU GUYS
FOR COME GETTING ME.
882
00:38:24,935 --> 00:38:27,869
OF COURSE.
WE'RE SORRY, RACHEL.
883
00:38:27,871 --> 00:38:32,974
YOU ARE A SMART AND INTELLIGENT
AND KIND AND FUNNY HUMAN BEING.
884
00:38:32,976 --> 00:38:34,475
YOU NEED TO BE ON THIS APP.
885
00:38:34,477 --> 00:38:38,044
- THIS IS NOT WORTH IT.
- THANK YOU.
886
00:38:38,046 --> 00:38:39,247
'CAUSE YOU'RE THE BEST.
887
00:38:39,249 --> 00:38:41,314
[SNIFFLES]
888
00:38:41,316 --> 00:38:42,782
[CHATTER]
889
00:38:42,784 --> 00:38:45,218
MERRY CHRISTMAS,
FEMALE SPECIMENS!
890
00:38:45,220 --> 00:38:47,753
HOW ARE YOU?
891
00:38:47,755 --> 00:38:49,088
I KNOW!
892
00:38:49,090 --> 00:38:52,992
WELL, HAPPY HANUKAH,
HAPPY KWANZA.
893
00:38:52,994 --> 00:38:57,398
I'LL SEE YOU GUYS,
UM, AFTER... CHRISTMAS.
894
00:39:00,767 --> 00:39:02,333
PRETTY IMPRESSIVE, HUH?
895
00:39:02,335 --> 00:39:05,003
UH, YEAH,
I REALLY LIKED YOUR BOOK.
896
00:39:05,005 --> 00:39:08,106
NO, I WAS TALKING
ABOUT "JUNGLE."
897
00:39:08,108 --> 00:39:11,942
UH, YEAH.
I MEAN, LANCE IS THE MAN.
898
00:39:11,944 --> 00:39:14,311
YOU KNOW?
899
00:39:14,313 --> 00:39:17,281
JAMES, IS THERE SOMETHING
YOU WANT TO TELL ME?
900
00:39:17,283 --> 00:39:22,120
UM.. MERRY CHRISTMAS,
PROFESSOR BARNES.
901
00:39:23,522 --> 00:39:26,224
MERRY CHRISTMAS, JAMES.
902
00:39:35,933 --> 00:39:39,301
[SIGHS]
903
00:39:39,303 --> 00:39:41,303
SO HOW DO YOU LIKE LIVING
WITH GRANDMA AND GRANDPA?
904
00:39:41,305 --> 00:39:44,071
GOOD.
905
00:39:44,073 --> 00:39:45,308
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO
ON BREAK?
906
00:39:47,343 --> 00:39:50,344
SOME CODING,
MAYBE SOME STUDYING.
907
00:39:50,346 --> 00:39:54,047
NO VISITING, PARTYING,
SOCIALIZING, WOMANIZING?
908
00:39:54,049 --> 00:39:56,349
I MEAN, THAT'S WHAT YOU NEED
TO BE DOING ON VACATION.
909
00:39:56,351 --> 00:39:58,885
YEAH, DAD, I'LL DEFINITELY
DO SOME OF THAT.
910
00:39:58,887 --> 00:40:02,955
I JUST DON'T WANT YOU
TO MISS OUT ON ANYTHING.
911
00:40:02,957 --> 00:40:05,157
WELL, LOOK, I GOTTA GET
BACK TO THE OFFICE.
912
00:40:05,159 --> 00:40:07,459
I'LL SEE YA
ON CHRISTMAS DAY.
913
00:40:07,461 --> 00:40:09,928
GOOD.
914
00:40:09,930 --> 00:40:13,898
LOOKING FORWARD TO A NICE
FAMILY CHRISTMAS, DAD.
915
00:40:13,900 --> 00:40:17,870
YEAH.
I LOVE YOU, JAMES.
916
00:40:28,880 --> 00:40:31,847
[GIRL 1] SO, LOOK AT THIS
NEW BLUSH I JUST GOT.
917
00:40:31,849 --> 00:40:33,383
- [GIRL 2] ISN'T IT SO PRETTY?
- [GIRL 3] SO PRETTY.
918
00:40:33,385 --> 00:40:36,986
- [GIRL 1] IT'S CALLED BERRY.
- [GIRL 2] SO COOL.
919
00:40:36,988 --> 00:40:38,153
[GIRL 1]
I KNOW, I LOVE IT.
920
00:40:38,155 --> 00:40:40,155
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
IN MY ROOM?
921
00:40:40,157 --> 00:40:41,991
IT'S MY HOME OFFICE NOW.
922
00:40:41,993 --> 00:40:44,360
- WHAT ARE YOU WORKING ON?
- MYSELF.
923
00:40:44,362 --> 00:40:47,161
ANYWAY,
HOW WAS YOUR FIRST SEMESTER?
924
00:40:47,163 --> 00:40:48,563
UH, INTERESTING.
925
00:40:48,565 --> 00:40:49,897
DID YOU MAKE ANY FRIENDS?
926
00:40:49,899 --> 00:40:51,966
I THINK I DID.
927
00:40:51,968 --> 00:40:54,001
INVITED
TO ANY HOLIDAY PARTIES?
928
00:40:54,003 --> 00:40:56,404
- NO.
- I THINK YOU DIDN'T.
929
00:40:56,406 --> 00:40:58,505
OH, YEAH. DON'T TRY TO MOVE
BACK INTO YOUR BEDROOM.
930
00:40:58,507 --> 00:41:00,974
AS YOU CAN TELL,
IT'S MY HOME OFFICE.
931
00:41:00,976 --> 00:41:03,410
SO, I'M GUESSING YOU CAN
SLEEP ON THE COUCH IN THE DEN.
932
00:41:03,412 --> 00:41:04,910
[SIGHS]
WHERE'S MOM?
933
00:41:04,912 --> 00:41:07,213
SHE'S AT A HOLIDAY LUNCH
WITH HER FRIENDS.
934
00:41:07,215 --> 00:41:08,481
DOES IT LOOK GOOD?
935
00:41:08,483 --> 00:41:10,149
- [GIRL 2] IT LOOKS SO PRETTY.
- YAY!
936
00:41:10,151 --> 00:41:12,251
CHECK OUT THIS LIP GLOSS,
IT HAS A LIGHT IN IT.
937
00:41:12,253 --> 00:41:14,320
- SHOW OFF! CAN I BORROW?
- [GIRL 2] OF COURSE.
938
00:41:14,322 --> 00:41:17,055
THANK YOU.
939
00:41:17,057 --> 00:41:19,958
- I LOVE IT.
- [WOMAN] YOU ARE SO GOOD!
940
00:41:19,960 --> 00:41:21,626
YOU NEED TO HAVE YOUR WORK
IN A GALLERY.
941
00:41:21,628 --> 00:41:23,361
OH, WELL,
I'M WORKING ON IT.
942
00:41:23,363 --> 00:41:25,497
OKAY, IT'S, UH,
JAMES' M.I.T. FUND.
943
00:41:25,499 --> 00:41:28,165
GALE, ARE YOU STILL PLANNING
ON LETTING YOUR EX
944
00:41:28,167 --> 00:41:29,333
BRING HIS NEW GIRLFRIEND
TO CHRISTMAS DINNER?
945
00:41:29,335 --> 00:41:30,968
SURE.
946
00:41:30,970 --> 00:41:32,303
WELL, I'M LETTING MY EX
COME TO CHRISTMAS DINNER.
947
00:41:32,305 --> 00:41:33,936
- YEAH, BUT NOT WITH GIRLFRIEND.
- NO.
948
00:41:33,938 --> 00:41:35,572
WAIT, IS JUSTIN SEEING
SOMEONE ALREADY?
949
00:41:35,574 --> 00:41:38,409
ALREADY? IT'S BEEN 10 MONTHS
SINCE LEAH'S DIVORCE.
950
00:41:38,411 --> 00:41:39,409
HE'S PROBABLY HAD LIKE
FIVE GIRLFRIENDS.
951
00:41:39,411 --> 00:41:41,077
NO, NO, NO, NO.
952
00:41:41,079 --> 00:41:43,446
I WANT TO KNOW NOTHING
ABOUT HIS DATING HISTORY.
953
00:41:43,448 --> 00:41:45,181
OH, THAT'S JUST BECAUSE OF THE
RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST YOU.
954
00:41:45,183 --> 00:41:47,383
OH, OKAY, IT WAS NOT
A RESTRAINING ORDER,
955
00:41:47,385 --> 00:41:50,285
IT WAS A...
A COUNSELOR'S EVALUATION.
956
00:41:50,287 --> 00:41:51,553
A COUNSELOR'S EVALUATION
TO STOP BREAKING INTO
957
00:41:51,555 --> 00:41:53,121
JUSTIN'S NEW APARTMENT.
958
00:41:53,123 --> 00:41:54,456
- I WANT MY CHINA BACK.
- [LAUGHS]
959
00:41:54,458 --> 00:41:55,590
WE NEED TO BE A LITTLE BIT
MORE SUPPORTIVE
960
00:41:55,592 --> 00:41:57,158
AND GIVE HER SOME CREDIT.
961
00:41:57,160 --> 00:41:58,393
SHE HASN'T BROKEN INTO
JUSTIN'S APARTMENT SINCE
962
00:41:58,395 --> 00:42:00,127
SHE STARTED THE MEDICATION.
963
00:42:00,129 --> 00:42:02,596
I JUST CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE
JUSTIN WITH A GIRLFRIEND.
964
00:42:02,598 --> 00:42:06,133
JUST SAYING THE WORDS,
"JUSTIN'S GIRLFRIEND," BLEGH.
965
00:42:06,135 --> 00:42:09,002
I THINK IT'S GOOD THAT WE HAVE
THE EXES AT THE HOLIDAY DINNER.
966
00:42:09,004 --> 00:42:10,604
I MEAN, WE'RE ALL STILL
A FAMILY.
967
00:42:10,606 --> 00:42:12,906
BUT YOU'RE DIVORCED.
YOU'RE NOT A FAMILY ANYMORE.
968
00:42:12,908 --> 00:42:15,908
- YES WE ARE.
- I MEAN, TECHNICALLY WE'RE FAMILY, RIGHT?
969
00:42:15,910 --> 00:42:18,143
AT LEAST, THE KIDS,
AND I DO LIVE WITH HIS PARENTS.
970
00:42:18,145 --> 00:42:19,512
[LAUGHTER]
971
00:42:19,514 --> 00:42:21,914
WELL, YOU KNOW, MAYBE
IT'S TIME THAT YOU
972
00:42:21,916 --> 00:42:23,615
FIND SOMEBODY NEW
AND MOVE ON.
973
00:42:23,617 --> 00:42:26,984
GUYS THAT ARE SINGLE
ARE EITHER TOO YOUNG OR TOO OLD.
974
00:42:26,986 --> 00:42:29,253
OKAY, SO WHERE ARE
THE AGE-APPROPRIATE MEN
975
00:42:29,255 --> 00:42:30,622
IN THEIR 40S AND 50S?
976
00:42:30,624 --> 00:42:32,457
THEY HAVEN'T HAD
THEIR DIVORCES YET.
977
00:42:32,459 --> 00:42:34,592
I HAVE FOUND A NEW WAY
TO MEET PEOPLE.
978
00:42:34,594 --> 00:42:36,561
OOH, SHARE.
979
00:42:36,563 --> 00:42:38,129
IT'S CALLED "JUNGLE."
980
00:42:38,131 --> 00:42:40,665
- [GASPS]
- I'VE HEARD OF "JUNGLE."
981
00:42:40,667 --> 00:42:42,199
YEAH, MY HAIRDRESSER
WAS TELLING ME ALL ABOUT IT.
982
00:42:42,201 --> 00:42:43,701
SHE SAYS THAT'S WHERE
ALL THE GUYS ARE.
983
00:42:43,703 --> 00:42:45,969
YEAH, BUT I HEAR THERE
ARE, LIKE, WEIRD CONDITIONS.
984
00:42:45,971 --> 00:42:48,405
YEAH, AND THE CONDITIONS
ONLY POP UP ON YOUR PHONE
985
00:42:48,407 --> 00:42:50,239
IN TINY PRINT WHEN YOU'RE
ON YOUR WAY TO YOUR DATE.
986
00:42:50,241 --> 00:42:51,475
UH-UH, NOT A DATE.
987
00:42:51,477 --> 00:42:54,176
BUT THEY SHOW UP
WHEN IT'S TOO LATE.
988
00:42:54,178 --> 00:42:56,579
YOU KNOW, A REAL PIECE OF WORK
MUST HAVE MADE THAT "JUNGLE."
989
00:42:56,581 --> 00:42:58,547
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I THINK YOU SHOULD GO FOR IT.
990
00:42:58,549 --> 00:43:01,249
YOU DESERVE TO MEET
SOMEBODY ELSE.
991
00:43:01,251 --> 00:43:02,951
- YEAH.
- TO "JUNGLE."
992
00:43:02,953 --> 00:43:04,986
TO "JUNGLE."
993
00:43:04,988 --> 00:43:10,327
...TO EVERYONE,
FOR CHRISTMAS.
994
00:43:12,562 --> 00:43:14,161
[DOORBELL RINGS]
995
00:43:14,163 --> 00:43:15,529
I THINK I HEAR DAD.
996
00:43:15,531 --> 00:43:17,133
OH, I'LL GET HIS GIFT.
997
00:43:19,268 --> 00:43:21,435
HEY, HEY, HEY!
THERE SHE IS!
998
00:43:21,437 --> 00:43:23,336
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL!
[SMOOCHES]
999
00:43:23,338 --> 00:43:24,605
MERRY CHRISTMAS, BABY.
1000
00:43:24,607 --> 00:43:26,139
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU, TOO.
1001
00:43:26,141 --> 00:43:27,740
- MERRY CHRISTMAS!
- SHE'S KINDA YOUNG.
1002
00:43:27,742 --> 00:43:29,275
OH, SWEET JESUS.
1003
00:43:29,277 --> 00:43:30,610
OH, ASHLEY,
THIS IS TIFFANY.
1004
00:43:30,612 --> 00:43:31,644
IS THERE A POWDER ROOM
I CAN USE?
1005
00:43:31,646 --> 00:43:33,178
I JUST WANNA CHECK MY FACE
1006
00:43:33,180 --> 00:43:35,046
- BEFORE I...
- OH, YEAH, SURE, SURE, SURE.
1007
00:43:35,048 --> 00:43:37,584
IT'S RIGHT DOWN THE HALL
OVER THERE TO THE RIGHT.
1008
00:43:39,253 --> 00:43:41,520
- UM, DAD?
- OH, YEAH.
1009
00:43:41,522 --> 00:43:44,489
I DON'T THINK IS MOM
IS GONNA BE OKAY WITH... THAT.
1010
00:43:44,491 --> 00:43:46,123
OH, COME ON,
SHE'LL BE FINE.
1011
00:43:46,125 --> 00:43:48,559
LISTEN, YOUR MOTHER AND I
ARE THE BEST OF FRIENDS.
1012
00:43:48,561 --> 00:43:50,194
MOM AND I
HAD A COOL DIVORCE.
1013
00:43:50,196 --> 00:43:51,228
- OKAY.
- [LEAH] HELLO, HELLO.
1014
00:43:51,230 --> 00:43:54,465
- MERRY CHRISTMAS.
- HI!
1015
00:43:54,467 --> 00:43:55,733
- HERE.
- OH, THANK YOU.
1016
00:43:55,735 --> 00:43:57,135
YOU CAN OPEN IT
NOW OR LATER.
1017
00:44:00,272 --> 00:44:02,372
HEY, THANKS FOR COMING.
1018
00:44:02,374 --> 00:44:05,409
IT MEANS A LOT TO THE KIDS,
AND TO YOUR PARENTS.
1019
00:44:07,211 --> 00:44:10,312
YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL.
THANK YOU FOR THIS,
1020
00:44:10,314 --> 00:44:12,550
UH, WE GOT SOMETHING
FOR YOU TOO.
1021
00:44:15,351 --> 00:44:17,285
OOH.
[CHUCKLES]
1022
00:44:17,287 --> 00:44:19,253
YEAH, OKAY.
1023
00:44:19,255 --> 00:44:22,459
LOOKS LIKE YOU GOT SETTLED IN
TO MY PARENTS HOUSE HERE.
1024
00:44:23,726 --> 00:44:25,258
WE HAD TO SETTLE SOMEWHERE
1025
00:44:25,260 --> 00:44:26,727
AFTER YOU BLEW THROUGH
YOUR INHERITANCE
1026
00:44:26,729 --> 00:44:30,230
AND FORECLOSED
ON OUR HOUSE.
1027
00:44:30,232 --> 00:44:33,098
I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT.
1028
00:44:33,100 --> 00:44:36,235
IT'S IN THE PAST.
1029
00:44:36,237 --> 00:44:40,372
YOU KNOW WHAT? LET'S JUST
HAVE A LOVELY HOLIDAY.
1030
00:44:40,374 --> 00:44:43,542
I AM FOR THAT.
1031
00:44:43,544 --> 00:44:45,109
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
1032
00:44:45,111 --> 00:44:48,246
UH. THIS IS SPECIAL CHOCOLATE
FROM SWEDEN.
1033
00:44:48,248 --> 00:44:49,447
SWITZERLAND.
1034
00:44:49,449 --> 00:44:51,483
UM, ARE YOU
ASHLEY'S FRIEND?
1035
00:44:51,485 --> 00:44:54,219
- NO, I'M...
- NO, NO, THIS IS TIFFANY.
1036
00:44:54,221 --> 00:44:57,356
- UH, SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND.
- HE FOUND ME ON "JUNGLE."
1037
00:44:59,291 --> 00:45:03,160
I THINK I'LL GO KISS
MY MOTHER NOW.
1038
00:45:03,162 --> 00:45:05,127
HI.
1039
00:45:05,129 --> 00:45:07,431
THE DRESS IS A LITTLE HIGHER
THAN IN YOUR DAY
1040
00:45:07,433 --> 00:45:08,732
AND MY DAY.
1041
00:45:08,734 --> 00:45:11,100
- I DON'T MIND IT.
- OH, MY GOD.
1042
00:45:11,102 --> 00:45:13,669
I MEAN, I'M NOT SAYING THAT
IT'S PROPER IN OUR DAY,
1043
00:45:13,671 --> 00:45:15,070
BUT IT'S PROPER
IN THEIR DAY.
1044
00:45:15,072 --> 00:45:16,372
WHAT IS HE THINKING?
1045
00:45:16,374 --> 00:45:18,075
I, UM...
1046
00:45:20,110 --> 00:45:22,544
I DIDN'T KNOW JUSTIN
HAD A GIRLFRIEND.
1047
00:45:22,546 --> 00:45:24,112
WE'RE KEEPING IT
UNDER THE RADAR
1048
00:45:24,114 --> 00:45:25,680
SINCE
YOUR LAST BREAK-IN, BUT...
1049
00:45:25,682 --> 00:45:27,616
[GIGGLES]
...NOW THAT I'M MOVING IN,
1050
00:45:27,618 --> 00:45:29,751
- IT'S KIND OF PUBLIC.
- MOVING IN?
1051
00:45:29,753 --> 00:45:32,086
YEAH! AND I WOULD LIKE
TO COMPLIMENT YOU
1052
00:45:32,088 --> 00:45:35,155
- ON YOUR TASTE IN CHINA.
- MY CHINA.
1053
00:45:35,157 --> 00:45:37,591
MM-HMM. THE PLATE SETTINGS THAT
JUSTIN HAS AT HIS APARTMENT.
1054
00:45:37,593 --> 00:45:40,761
YEAH, YEAH, THE LENNOX
WITH THE LITTLE PINK FLOWERS.
1055
00:45:40,763 --> 00:45:42,830
AND DON'T WORRY,
I ONLY BROKE ONE DINNER PLATE,
1056
00:45:42,832 --> 00:45:45,798
BUT I'M GONNA BE SUPER CAREFUL
FROM NOW ON.
1057
00:45:45,800 --> 00:45:48,635
THAT'S THE CHINA MY GRANDMOTHER
GOT US ON OUR WEDDING DAY.
1058
00:45:48,637 --> 00:45:50,703
WELL, I THINK
SHE'S VERY ATTRACTIVE.
1059
00:45:50,705 --> 00:45:52,671
SHE'S LIKE 12 YEARS OLD,
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
1060
00:45:52,673 --> 00:45:55,340
YEAH, IT'S PERFECT. I'M GONNA
DECORATE THE WHOLE APARTMENT
1061
00:45:55,342 --> 00:45:57,342
AROUND THE COLOR SCHEME,
SO, THANK YOU!
1062
00:45:57,344 --> 00:45:59,647
[KISSES]
1063
00:46:02,482 --> 00:46:05,449
YOU'RE WELCOME,
YOU'RE WELCOME.
1064
00:46:05,451 --> 00:46:06,884
I MEAN, YOU'RE NAKED,
BUT...
1065
00:46:06,886 --> 00:46:09,522
[CHUCKLES]
...YOU'RE WELCOME.
1066
00:46:11,624 --> 00:46:13,858
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
1067
00:46:13,860 --> 00:46:16,459
- NICE TO MEET YOU, TIFFANY.
- HI, NICE TO MEET YOU, TOO.
1068
00:46:16,461 --> 00:46:18,193
ARE YOU ONE OF
ASHLEY'S FRIENDS?
1069
00:46:18,195 --> 00:46:19,629
- OH, NO.
- NO, MOM, THAT'S MY TIFFANY.
1070
00:46:19,631 --> 00:46:21,263
[TIFFANY] EVERYONE KEEPS
ASKING ME THAT.
1071
00:46:21,265 --> 00:46:24,233
CAN I GET ANYBODY A DRINK?
WOULD YOU LIKE A DRINK?
1072
00:46:24,235 --> 00:46:27,336
MAYBE SOME, LIKE...
CHOCOLATE MILK.
1073
00:46:27,338 --> 00:46:30,539
UM, YOU GUYS GOING
TO A CLUB AFTER DINNER?
1074
00:46:30,541 --> 00:46:32,108
I HOPE SO.
1075
00:46:38,582 --> 00:46:41,283
I LOVE WHAT YOU'VE DONE
TO THE ROOM, JAMES.
1076
00:46:43,887 --> 00:46:47,723
UM, AREN'T YOU TAKING
ANY TIME OFF FOR CHRISTMAS?
1077
00:46:49,224 --> 00:46:51,357
I'M TRYING TO CATCH UP
ON SOME WORK.
1078
00:46:51,359 --> 00:46:55,261
ALL RIGHT.
I DON'T THINK YOU CAN.
1079
00:46:55,263 --> 00:46:56,596
CAN WHAT?
1080
00:46:56,598 --> 00:46:59,699
WELL, I DON'T THINK
YOU CAN CATCH UP
1081
00:46:59,701 --> 00:47:02,434
WITH WHATEVER
YOU'RE LOOKING FOR
1082
00:47:02,436 --> 00:47:04,502
WHEN YOU'RE LOOKING
AT A COMPUTER
1083
00:47:04,504 --> 00:47:06,840
AND A PHONE ALL DAY.
1084
00:47:10,744 --> 00:47:12,410
WHAT AM I LOOKING FOR?
1085
00:47:12,412 --> 00:47:15,312
WELL,
I'M NOT SURE,
1086
00:47:15,314 --> 00:47:18,782
BUT I AM SURE THAT YOU
HAVE TO FACE PEOPLE
1087
00:47:18,784 --> 00:47:21,852
FACE TO FACE
TO FIND IT.
1088
00:47:21,854 --> 00:47:23,188
COME ON.
1089
00:47:24,890 --> 00:47:26,257
NAH-AH-AH.
1090
00:47:33,397 --> 00:47:36,665
- MERRY CHRISTMAS.
- MERRY CHRISTMAS, JAMES.
1091
00:47:36,667 --> 00:47:38,400
I HAVE A FAVOR TO ASK.
1092
00:47:38,402 --> 00:47:41,603
I WANT YOU TO HELP ME
FACE THE FAMILY.
1093
00:47:41,605 --> 00:47:44,438
LET'S GO DOWN THERE
AND YOU TELL AUNT GILDA
1094
00:47:44,440 --> 00:47:49,377
THAT YOU CAN'T SEE THAT SHE
HAD ANY BAD PLASTIC SURGERY.
1095
00:47:49,379 --> 00:47:51,814
THE RUMOR IS
A DEER SHOT HER.
1096
00:47:55,317 --> 00:47:57,384
[SUNNY WHISPERING] SWEETHEART,
WHY DON'T YOU GIVE A TOAST?
1097
00:47:57,386 --> 00:47:58,986
A SHORT ONE,
A SHORT TOAST.
1098
00:47:58,988 --> 00:48:02,889
OKAY, UM...
A TOAST.
1099
00:48:02,891 --> 00:48:05,992
I'VE... WHILE WE'RE TOGETHER
I'D LIKE TO HAVE A DINNER,
1100
00:48:05,994 --> 00:48:07,626
[PHONES CHIMING
AND BEEPING]
1101
00:48:07,628 --> 00:48:10,996
THAT REALLY MEANS A LOT MORE
THAN JUST EATING.
1102
00:48:10,998 --> 00:48:13,932
THESE TWO PEOPLE,
JACK AND KAREN
1103
00:48:13,934 --> 00:48:17,502
HAVE BEEN, REALLY, MY EXAMPLE
THAT I'VE LIVED BY.
1104
00:48:17,504 --> 00:48:18,971
[EXCESSIVE PHONE
CHIMING CONTINUES]
1105
00:48:18,973 --> 00:48:21,639
THEY'VE GONE THROUGH
SO MUCH TOGETHER,
1106
00:48:21,641 --> 00:48:25,777
AND THE IDEA THAT YOU'RE HERE
AND THAT WE'RE STILL TOGETHER,
1107
00:48:25,779 --> 00:48:28,412
IT'S THOSE THINGS THAT REALLY
MEAN SOMETHING IN OUR LIFE,
1108
00:48:28,414 --> 00:48:31,782
THAT LASTS, THAT NOT THE THINGS
THAT ARE MOMENTARY.
1109
00:48:31,784 --> 00:48:35,786
I'VE KNOWN MANY,
I'VE LIKED A FEW,
1110
00:48:35,788 --> 00:48:37,453
LOVED ONE,
1111
00:48:37,455 --> 00:48:38,554
AND HERE'S TO YOU.
1112
00:48:38,556 --> 00:48:39,722
- AWW.
- [WOMAN] AWW.
1113
00:48:39,724 --> 00:48:41,957
MERRY CHRISTMAS,
SWEETHEART.
1114
00:48:41,959 --> 00:48:43,626
MERRY CHRISTMAS,
EVERYONE.
1115
00:48:43,628 --> 00:48:44,860
[ASHLEY]
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
1116
00:48:44,862 --> 00:48:46,962
AWW, MERRY CHRISTMAS...
AWW, THANK YOU.
1117
00:48:46,964 --> 00:48:49,865
- THAT WAS SWEET, DAD.
- THAT WAS SO SWEET.
1118
00:48:49,867 --> 00:48:53,568
LET'S UH, EMBARGO THE PHONES
FOR DINNER, HUH?
1119
00:48:53,570 --> 00:48:55,670
SO, EVERYBODY
JUST GIVE ME YOUR PHONE.
1120
00:48:55,672 --> 00:48:57,438
I'LL TAKE YOUR PHONE.
1121
00:48:57,440 --> 00:49:00,407
THAT'S A GREAT PICTURE.
UH, THIS...
1122
00:49:00,409 --> 00:49:02,876
GIMME...
JAMES, JAMES...
1123
00:49:02,878 --> 00:49:05,446
I NEED YOUR PHONE,
WE'RE EMBARGOING THE PHONES.
1124
00:49:05,448 --> 00:49:07,648
PLEASE ASHLEY,
YOU CAN TALK LATER.
1125
00:49:07,650 --> 00:49:10,918
UM, YOU'D ONLY TEXT ANYWAY.
[LAUGHS]
1126
00:49:10,920 --> 00:49:12,487
UH, BILLY...
1127
00:49:14,522 --> 00:49:19,859
PUT IT UP.
NOT BAD, NOT BAD.
1128
00:49:19,861 --> 00:49:23,495
I CAN'T SEE MY FACE.
1129
00:49:23,497 --> 00:49:25,733
[SLURPS]
1130
00:49:27,334 --> 00:49:28,767
I CAN'T SEE MY FACE.
1131
00:49:28,769 --> 00:49:30,804
HOW DO I...
1132
00:49:33,740 --> 00:49:35,840
HEY, MOM! CAN I...
1133
00:49:35,842 --> 00:49:37,041
[LAUGHS NERVOUSLY]
1134
00:49:37,043 --> 00:49:39,677
MOM, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
1135
00:49:39,679 --> 00:49:42,579
I'M...
[LAUGHS]
1136
00:49:42,581 --> 00:49:44,681
I'M TAKING A PICTURE,
1137
00:49:44,683 --> 00:49:47,417
BUT ARMS
AREN'T LONG ENOUGH,
1138
00:49:47,419 --> 00:49:49,018
SO I NEED YOU
TO TAKE IT FOR ME.
1139
00:49:49,020 --> 00:49:50,385
UM, WHAT IS IT FOR?
1140
00:49:50,387 --> 00:49:52,088
OH, DON'T TAKE THAT,
TAKE THAT.
1141
00:49:52,090 --> 00:49:54,523
IT'S FOR MY COLLECTION.
1142
00:49:54,525 --> 00:49:56,658
OKAY, I'M NOT DOING IT UNLESS
YOU TELL ME WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
1143
00:49:56,660 --> 00:49:59,027
- I AM SCARED.
- DON'T BE SCARED,
1144
00:49:59,029 --> 00:50:01,063
THERE'S NO NEED
TO BE AFRAID,
1145
00:50:01,065 --> 00:50:05,466
IT'S ALL GOOD IN THE HOOD.
1146
00:50:05,468 --> 00:50:08,002
[SNORTS, LAUGHS]
1147
00:50:08,004 --> 00:50:12,539
IT'S JUST A PICTURE.
READY?
1148
00:50:12,541 --> 00:50:17,677
[ASHLEY] READY?
ONE, TWO, THREE, WINE.
1149
00:50:17,679 --> 00:50:18,912
[PHONE CAMERA SNAPS]
1150
00:50:18,914 --> 00:50:21,447
OKAY, LET ME SEE.
1151
00:50:21,449 --> 00:50:22,851
IT'S GOOD.
1152
00:50:24,685 --> 00:50:28,053
CAN YOU PHOTOSHOP OUT
ABOUT FIVE POUNDS?
1153
00:50:28,055 --> 00:50:29,655
IS THERE AN APP FOR THAT?
1154
00:50:29,657 --> 00:50:31,757
MOM, THERE'S AN APP
FOR EVERYTHING.
1155
00:50:31,759 --> 00:50:33,759
OH, DOWNLOAD IT.
1156
00:50:33,761 --> 00:50:35,827
- OKAY, WE DON'T HAVE TO...
- DOWNLOADING!
1157
00:50:35,829 --> 00:50:37,929
WAITING FOR THE BLUE LINE.
1158
00:50:37,931 --> 00:50:39,564
MOM, WE DON'T HAVE TIME
FOR THAT.
1159
00:50:39,566 --> 00:50:40,698
- NO.
- YOU TAKE THIS.
1160
00:50:40,700 --> 00:50:42,767
- OKAY.
- I'LL BE TAKING THIS.
1161
00:50:42,769 --> 00:50:44,501
OKEY-DOKE.
1162
00:50:44,503 --> 00:50:46,104
GOOD NIGHT, HONEY.
1163
00:50:46,106 --> 00:50:47,871
GOOD NIGHT.
1164
00:50:47,873 --> 00:50:50,707
I'LL SEE YOU MAÑANA.
1165
00:50:50,709 --> 00:50:52,810
I WILL SEE YOU...
1166
00:50:52,812 --> 00:50:54,111
[THUD]
1167
00:50:54,113 --> 00:50:55,948
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
1168
00:50:59,050 --> 00:51:02,151
WHAT'S UP, YOU BIG LOSERS?
NO PLANS TONIGHT?
1169
00:51:02,153 --> 00:51:04,854
NO, I'M STILL TIRED
FROM YESTERDAY.
1170
00:51:04,856 --> 00:51:06,621
I NEED A SPA VACATION
AFTER AN EVENING
1171
00:51:06,623 --> 00:51:08,057
TALKING TO AUNT GILDA.
1172
00:51:08,059 --> 00:51:09,825
I'M STILL STUDYING
FOR NEXT SEMESTER.
1173
00:51:09,827 --> 00:51:11,927
ONLY A PSYCHO DOES THE WORK
A SEMESTER AHEAD OF TIME.
1174
00:51:11,929 --> 00:51:13,460
[SIGHS]
1175
00:51:13,462 --> 00:51:15,563
MOM, ARE YOU GOING OUT
WITH YOUR FRIENDS?
1176
00:51:15,565 --> 00:51:18,799
- UM, A NEW FRIEND.
- WHO?
1177
00:51:18,801 --> 00:51:21,135
I DON'T KNOW HIS NAME,
BUT WE'RE MEETING AT A CAFE.
1178
00:51:21,137 --> 00:51:22,903
UH, WHERE DID YOU
MEET HIM?
1179
00:51:22,905 --> 00:51:25,706
WELL, WE HAVEN'T
ACTUALLY MET.
1180
00:51:25,708 --> 00:51:27,707
I DON'T THINK
I CAN SAY MEET.
1181
00:51:27,709 --> 00:51:29,709
I'M SORRY, THERE'S A LOT
OF FUNNY CONDITIONS.
1182
00:51:29,711 --> 00:51:30,844
CONDITIONS TO WHAT?
1183
00:51:30,846 --> 00:51:32,879
TO WHAT I CAN SAY.
[CHUCKLES]
1184
00:51:32,881 --> 00:51:35,782
ALL I KNOW IS HE REALLY LIKED
MY PHOTO PROFILE.
1185
00:51:35,784 --> 00:51:38,617
OKAY, WHAT PHOTO?
1186
00:51:38,619 --> 00:51:40,419
MOM! NO!
1187
00:51:40,421 --> 00:51:43,488
IT'S OKAY, HONEY, REALLY,
EVERYONE IS DOING IT.
1188
00:51:43,490 --> 00:51:45,423
I CAN'T BELIEVE
I JUST SAID THAT OUT LOUD.
1189
00:51:45,425 --> 00:51:47,491
OKAY, MOM,
I DO NOT APPROVE.
1190
00:51:47,493 --> 00:51:50,661
OKAY, WELL, IT IS NOT FOR YOU
TO APPROVE OR DISAPPROVE,
1191
00:51:50,663 --> 00:51:53,531
ALL RIGHT? I'M GOING
AND I WILL BE BACK LATER.
1192
00:51:53,533 --> 00:51:54,866
OKAY, WELL AT LEAST TELL ME
WHERE YOU MET THIS GUY
1193
00:51:54,868 --> 00:51:56,100
SO I CAN DO SOME RESEARCH.
1194
00:51:56,102 --> 00:51:58,835
FINE, IT'S CALLED "JUNGLE,"
OKAY?
1195
00:51:58,837 --> 00:52:01,039
LOVE YOU BOTH!
BYE!
1196
00:52:05,911 --> 00:52:09,179
WHAT ARE WE EVEN DOING
FOLLOWING MOM ON HER DATE?
1197
00:52:09,181 --> 00:52:11,847
IT'S NOT A DATE.
YOU CAN TRUST ME ON THAT.
1198
00:52:11,849 --> 00:52:14,617
I THINK IT'S WONDERFUL THAT
YOUR MOTHER'S SEEING PEOPLE.
1199
00:52:14,619 --> 00:52:17,518
SHE NEEDS
TO GET OUT MORE.
1200
00:52:17,520 --> 00:52:19,221
I JUST FLORENCE.
I WANT TO MOVE THERE
1201
00:52:19,223 --> 00:52:22,457
AND JUST IMMERSE MYSELF
IN THE CULTURE AND THE ART,
1202
00:52:22,459 --> 00:52:24,125
JUST THE SHAPES
AND THE COLOR.
1203
00:52:24,127 --> 00:52:25,793
ALL RIGHT, SO WE BOTH
LOVE ITALY.
1204
00:52:25,795 --> 00:52:27,161
YOU LOVE ITALY, TOO?
1205
00:52:27,163 --> 00:52:29,630
YEAH, YEAH, I CAN EAT
PIZZA ALL DAY LONG.
1206
00:52:29,632 --> 00:52:31,531
LISTEN, I THINK WE KNOW
EACH OTHER WELL ENOUGH,
1207
00:52:31,533 --> 00:52:32,532
LET'S GO.
1208
00:52:32,534 --> 00:52:34,101
ARE WE GOING TO EAT PIZZA?
1209
00:52:34,103 --> 00:52:36,003
NO, I'VE INVESTED MORE TIME
THAN I WAS PLANNING,
1210
00:52:36,005 --> 00:52:38,038
I'M NOT GONNA SPEND
MONEY ON YOU.
1211
00:52:38,040 --> 00:52:39,505
I CAN BUY PIZZA.
1212
00:52:39,507 --> 00:52:42,575
APARTMENT 754,
JUST FOLLOW ME, OKAY?
1213
00:52:42,577 --> 00:52:45,912
- WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
- THAT'S AGAINST THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS.
1214
00:52:45,914 --> 00:52:48,714
ARE YOU COMING?
1215
00:52:48,716 --> 00:52:53,685
- NO, NO, I'M NOT.
- [SCOFFS] I GOTTA GO.
1216
00:52:53,687 --> 00:52:55,487
MY NEXT APPOINTMENT'S
WAITING FOR ME.
1217
00:52:55,489 --> 00:52:57,589
BUT LISTEN, DON'T PLAY
SO HARD TO GET, LADY!
1218
00:52:57,591 --> 00:52:59,224
[SCOFFS]
1219
00:52:59,226 --> 00:53:01,259
- YOU OKAY?
- NO, IT WAS AWFUL, I WANT TO GO HOME.
1220
00:53:01,261 --> 00:53:03,627
NO, NO, NO, LEAH,
DON'T YOU DARE GIVE UP.
1221
00:53:03,629 --> 00:53:05,629
- I WANT TO GO HOME.
- YOU JUST HAVEN'T MET THE RIGHT ONE YET, OKAY?
1222
00:53:05,631 --> 00:53:07,531
HE'S OUT THERE SOMEWHERE.
HERE, GIVE ME THIS.
1223
00:53:07,533 --> 00:53:08,699
GIVE ME THIS, LET'S SEE.
1224
00:53:08,701 --> 00:53:09,967
OOH, YOU GOT SOME
NEW SWIPES.
1225
00:53:09,969 --> 00:53:11,601
- THAT'S A GOOD SIGN, HONEY.
- NO, NO.
1226
00:53:11,603 --> 00:53:13,170
OKAY, LET'S SEE, LET'S LOOK
AT THESE OPTION...
1227
00:53:13,172 --> 00:53:16,606
OH! SIGH, INTERESTING.
1228
00:53:16,608 --> 00:53:19,108
OH, MY EX-HUSBAND, OKAY.
1229
00:53:19,110 --> 00:53:20,877
- OH, HOW ABOUT THIS ONE?
- OH, HE'S CUTE.
1230
00:53:20,879 --> 00:53:24,613
- YEAH!
- GUYS, THAT'S JUSTIN'S COUSIN, BILL.
1231
00:53:24,615 --> 00:53:27,117
YOUR MOTHER'S
LEAVING THE CAFE.
1232
00:53:28,519 --> 00:53:31,753
- SHE'S ALONE. BAD SIGN.
- GOOD SIGN.
1233
00:53:31,755 --> 00:53:35,090
- OUR WORK IS DONE.
- IT'S JUST BEGUN.
1234
00:53:35,092 --> 00:53:38,759
CAN WE TAKE THEM HOME NOW
SO WE CAN GO OUT?
1235
00:53:38,761 --> 00:53:40,094
OUT?
IT'S 1:00 AM.
1236
00:53:40,096 --> 00:53:41,998
THAT'S WHEN THE CLUBS OPEN.
1237
00:53:46,702 --> 00:53:48,170
JAMES.
1238
00:53:50,138 --> 00:53:51,938
JAMES.
1239
00:53:51,940 --> 00:53:53,108
JAMES.
1240
00:53:57,212 --> 00:53:59,211
HONEY, GO TO BED.
1241
00:53:59,213 --> 00:54:01,981
- WHERE'D YOU GO?
- OUT.
1242
00:54:01,983 --> 00:54:03,581
NO, I MEAN,
AFTER THE CAFE.
1243
00:54:03,583 --> 00:54:07,219
YOU LEFT THE CAFE
HOURS AGO.
1244
00:54:07,221 --> 00:54:10,788
HOW DO YOU KNOW WHERE I WAS
AND WHAT TIME I LEFT?
1245
00:54:10,790 --> 00:54:12,656
NEW APP.
1246
00:54:12,658 --> 00:54:14,092
OH.
1247
00:54:14,094 --> 00:54:16,927
- WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?
- ABOUT WHAT?
1248
00:54:16,929 --> 00:54:19,029
ABOUT MEETING PEOPLE?
1249
00:54:19,031 --> 00:54:23,200
OH, WELL...
1250
00:54:23,202 --> 00:54:28,604
I GUESS I'M GONNA HAVE TO WRAP
MY HEAD AROUND HOW THINGS ARE,
1251
00:54:28,606 --> 00:54:31,273
AND, UM...
1252
00:54:31,275 --> 00:54:33,778
I DON'T KNOW,
GET USED TO IT.
1253
00:54:37,814 --> 00:54:40,749
I LOVE YOU, JAMES.
1254
00:54:40,751 --> 00:54:43,051
GOOD NIGHT.
1255
00:54:43,053 --> 00:54:46,287
♪ I NEED TO FIND OUT
SO I CAN SLEEP TIGHT ♪
1256
00:54:46,289 --> 00:54:51,091
♪ MAYBE I'M OKAY
1257
00:54:51,093 --> 00:54:56,165
♪ WITH NOT
SO PERFECT TODAY ♪
1258
00:54:57,599 --> 00:55:00,700
♪ NOT SO PERFECT TODAY...
1259
00:55:00,702 --> 00:55:03,136
- WHAT DID YOU DO?
- GET OUT OF MY ROOM.
1260
00:55:03,138 --> 00:55:04,871
IT'S MY ROOM NOW.
1261
00:55:04,873 --> 00:55:06,172
IF YOU COME IN THIS ROOM
AGAIN WHILE I'M HOME
1262
00:55:06,174 --> 00:55:07,873
OR WHILE I'M AWAY,
I'LL SEND OUT A MESSAGE
1263
00:55:07,875 --> 00:55:10,343
AND IT'LL GO VIRAL
THAT YOU HAVE AN STD.
1264
00:55:10,345 --> 00:55:12,077
OKAY, WELL,
THAT'S A LIE.
1265
00:55:12,079 --> 00:55:15,013
- I HAVEN'T EVEN...
- EVEN BETTER, A VIRGIN.
1266
00:55:15,015 --> 00:55:18,050
ABSTINENCE IS FAR WORSE
STIGMA IN PUBLIC HIGH SCHOOL.
1267
00:55:18,052 --> 00:55:20,751
NOTHING WILL RUIN
YOUR SOCIAL STANDING FASTER.
1268
00:55:20,753 --> 00:55:22,253
WHO DO YOU THINK
YOUR REAL PARENTS ARE?
1269
00:55:22,255 --> 00:55:24,221
BECAUSE I CAN'T
SEEM TO FIGURE IT OUT.
1270
00:55:24,223 --> 00:55:27,657
I SEE NOW THAT I'M A SOLDIER
STANDING IN A BATTLEFIELD
1271
00:55:27,659 --> 00:55:28,993
ENGAGED IN A WAR FAR WORSE
THAN ANY 18-YEAR-OLD
1272
00:55:28,995 --> 00:55:30,261
COULD EVEN FATHOM.
1273
00:55:30,263 --> 00:55:32,762
OKAY, STOP THE SOLILOQUY,
I GET IT!
1274
00:55:32,764 --> 00:55:35,031
YOU WANT
YOUR ROOM BACK, FINE!
1275
00:55:35,033 --> 00:55:36,766
BUT YOU'RE GONNA TURN
INTO A CYBORG.
1276
00:55:36,768 --> 00:55:38,667
YOUR HAND AND THE KEYBOARD
ARE GOING TO FUSE
1277
00:55:38,669 --> 00:55:39,868
AND YOU'RE GONNA BE
MORE EMBARRASSING
1278
00:55:39,870 --> 00:55:42,971
THAN YOU ALREADY ARE.
1279
00:55:42,973 --> 00:55:44,740
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
1280
00:55:44,742 --> 00:55:48,944
I MEAN, NOT THAT I CARE,
BUT IN CASE MOM ASKS.
1281
00:55:48,946 --> 00:55:51,712
I HAVE SOME RESEARCH TO DO.
1282
00:55:51,714 --> 00:55:53,915
OKAY, UM, I'LL TELL HER
YOU WENT TO THE MALL,
1283
00:55:53,917 --> 00:55:56,918
JUST TO GIVE HER A LITTLE HOPE
YOU'RE WITHIN THE BELL CURVE.
1284
00:55:56,920 --> 00:55:58,352
I'M NOT GETTING PERSONAL,
1285
00:55:58,354 --> 00:56:00,654
BUT YOU KNOW I LIKE
TO KNOW EVERYTHING.
1286
00:56:00,656 --> 00:56:03,424
- [LAUGHS]
- JAMES!
1287
00:56:03,426 --> 00:56:06,193
HI, SWEETHEART.
1288
00:56:06,195 --> 00:56:08,261
- HEY.
- HI, GRANDMA.
1289
00:56:08,263 --> 00:56:11,031
YOU ALL KNOW JAMES,
HE'S HOME FOR HOLIDAY BREAK.
1290
00:56:11,033 --> 00:56:12,898
[GROUP]
HI, JAMES.
1291
00:56:12,900 --> 00:56:15,835
JAMES IS DOING RESEARCH
ON RELATIONSHIPS,
1292
00:56:15,837 --> 00:56:18,170
AND HE WOULD TO HAVE
OUR INPUT.
1293
00:56:18,172 --> 00:56:20,372
UM, YEAH, SO I HAVE SOME
QUESTIONNAIRES HERE
1294
00:56:20,374 --> 00:56:23,211
THAT I'M JUST GONNA PASS OUT
REALLY QUICK.
1295
00:56:24,945 --> 00:56:26,811
- YEAH.
- OKAY, THANK YOU.
1296
00:56:26,813 --> 00:56:30,681
SO, THESE QUESTIONS
I'VE PREPARED ARE BASED ON
1297
00:56:30,683 --> 00:56:33,016
THE MORAYS OF THE '50S
AND '60S,
1298
00:56:33,018 --> 00:56:34,785
SO, THEY'RE PRETTY
SELF-EXPLANATORY.
1299
00:56:34,787 --> 00:56:36,987
OKAY, COME ON, LET'S SIT DOWN,
SWEETHEART.
1300
00:56:36,989 --> 00:56:40,958
LET'S SEE WHAT
JAMES IS RESEARCHING.
1301
00:56:40,960 --> 00:56:45,295
"HOW OLD WERE YOU WERE YOU
WHEN YOU FIRST HAD SEX?"
1302
00:56:45,297 --> 00:56:48,030
[CHUCKLES]
OKAY.
1303
00:56:48,032 --> 00:56:51,800
LET ME THINK, UM...
1304
00:56:51,802 --> 00:56:52,803
18.
1305
00:56:56,006 --> 00:57:00,275
"HOW MANY PEOPLE DID YOU SLEEP
WITH BEFORE YOU GOT MARRIED?"
1306
00:57:00,277 --> 00:57:04,179
OH.
[CLEARS THROAT]
1307
00:57:04,181 --> 00:57:07,047
THIS IS AWFULLY
PERSONAL, JAMES.
1308
00:57:07,049 --> 00:57:08,983
GRANDPA,
I REALLY NEED TO KNOW.
1309
00:57:08,985 --> 00:57:11,986
YEAH, ME TOO.
1310
00:57:11,988 --> 00:57:14,956
WELL...
1311
00:57:17,893 --> 00:57:19,792
[LAUGHS]
1312
00:57:19,794 --> 00:57:21,494
NONE.
1313
00:57:21,496 --> 00:57:26,064
YOUR GRANDMOTHER WAS
MY HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEART,
1314
00:57:26,066 --> 00:57:27,966
MY FIRST...
1315
00:57:27,968 --> 00:57:30,736
MY LAST...
1316
00:57:30,738 --> 00:57:32,037
MY ONLY.
1317
00:57:32,039 --> 00:57:35,006
- AWW.
- [ALL] AWW.
1318
00:57:35,008 --> 00:57:37,177
[CHUCKLES]
1319
00:57:40,013 --> 00:57:43,847
"DID YOU PERSONALLY KNOW
ANY GIRLS THAT GOT PREGNANT
1320
00:57:43,849 --> 00:57:47,318
IN HIGH SCHOOL?"
1321
00:57:47,320 --> 00:57:49,953
ONLY ONE.
1322
00:57:49,955 --> 00:57:54,823
AH HERE'S ONE,
"WHAT MADE A GIRL ATTRACTIVE?"
1323
00:57:54,825 --> 00:57:56,259
[CHUCKLES]
WELL, THAT'S EASY.
1324
00:57:56,261 --> 00:57:58,961
BIG, UH... EYES.
1325
00:57:58,963 --> 00:58:00,930
[MAN]
YOU CHICKEN!
1326
00:58:00,932 --> 00:58:02,932
I'M A ROMANTIC,
I LOVE BIG EYES,
1327
00:58:02,934 --> 00:58:04,766
THEY'RE THE WINDOWS
OF THE SOUL.
1328
00:58:04,768 --> 00:58:08,437
WELL,
I LOVE THESE APPETIZERS.
1329
00:58:08,439 --> 00:58:10,371
THANK YOU,
THANKS, JOHN.
1330
00:58:10,373 --> 00:58:14,042
PUT THAT ON MY LIST OF WHAT
MAKES A GIRL ATTRACTIVE.
1331
00:58:14,044 --> 00:58:16,244
MY TURN!
1332
00:58:16,246 --> 00:58:20,380
"DID MEN EXPECT WOMEN TO SLEEP
WITH THEM ON THE FIRST DATE?"
1333
00:58:20,382 --> 00:58:22,916
WHEN YOU'RE ENGAGED,
IT'S KIND OF EXPECTED.
1334
00:58:22,918 --> 00:58:26,520
KAREN, IT WASN'T EXPECTED
IN OUR DAY.
1335
00:58:26,522 --> 00:58:29,055
YOU WERE JUST
THE TOWN SLUT.
1336
00:58:29,057 --> 00:58:31,891
UH, WOULD YOU BRING SOME
MORE OF THOSE POTATO CHIPS?
1337
00:58:31,893 --> 00:58:34,026
THEY'RE JUST GREAT.
1338
00:58:34,028 --> 00:58:36,895
SO, ARE YOU SAYING
IT WASN'T A CUSTOMARY THING
1339
00:58:36,897 --> 00:58:38,897
FOR A GIRL TO BE
PROMISCUOUS?
1340
00:58:38,899 --> 00:58:43,168
NO, NO, NO, IT WASN'T CUSTOMARY
FOR WOMEN TO BE PROMISCUOUS,
1341
00:58:43,170 --> 00:58:45,503
I MEAN, YEAH, YOU KIDS
REALLY HAVE IT MADE TODAY.
1342
00:58:45,505 --> 00:58:49,241
JOHN! IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT SEX,
YOU KNOW.
1343
00:58:49,243 --> 00:58:52,477
SORRY, SWEETHEART.
1344
00:58:52,479 --> 00:58:56,280
"HOW DO YOU FEEL WHEN A MAN
LEAVES YOU RIGHT AFTER SEX?"
1345
00:58:56,282 --> 00:58:58,249
- ARE YOU GOING SOMEWHERE?
- NO.
1346
00:58:58,251 --> 00:58:59,250
I WANNA KNOW WHERE
YOU'RE GOING.
1347
00:58:59,252 --> 00:59:00,950
NOWHERE!
1348
00:59:00,952 --> 00:59:03,419
UH, JAMES, LET'S YOU AND I
HAVE A LITTLE TALK.
1349
00:59:03,421 --> 00:59:04,821
COME OVER HERE JUST A SECOND.
1350
00:59:04,823 --> 00:59:06,489
LEAVE THE COMPUTER.
1351
00:59:06,491 --> 00:59:11,762
WELL, UM, WOULD YOU LIKE SOME
MORE LAYS POTATO CHIPS, CAROLYN?
1352
00:59:13,230 --> 00:59:16,064
JAMES, WHAT'S WITH
ALL THESE QUESTIONS?
1353
00:59:16,066 --> 00:59:18,066
I'M JUST DOING
SOME RESEARCH.
1354
00:59:18,068 --> 00:59:21,969
MY SEX LIFE IS INTEGRAL
TO THIS PROCESS?
1355
00:59:21,971 --> 00:59:24,105
I'M TRYING TO FIGURE OUT
RELATIONSHIPS.
1356
00:59:24,107 --> 00:59:25,406
WELL, MAYBE YOU SHOULD
HAVE ONE
1357
00:59:25,408 --> 00:59:27,174
WITH A WHOLE HUMAN BEING.
1358
00:59:27,176 --> 00:59:28,609
THAT'S WHAT
I'M TRYING TO DO.
1359
00:59:28,611 --> 00:59:32,846
WELL, I DON'T KNOW
ANOTHER APP IS THE ANSWER.
1360
00:59:32,848 --> 00:59:36,349
I WASN'T PLANNING ON
MAKING ANOTHER APP, BUT...
1361
00:59:36,351 --> 00:59:38,451
WHAT OTHER APP?
1362
00:59:38,453 --> 00:59:41,920
I DON'T MY SEX LIFE
ON SNACK-CHAT,
1363
00:59:41,922 --> 00:59:43,289
OR ONE OF THOSE...
1364
00:59:43,291 --> 00:59:45,324
WHY WOULD I WANT TO DO THAT?
1365
00:59:45,326 --> 00:59:48,627
WHY WOULD I WANT
GRANDMOTHER ON SNACK-CHAT?
1366
00:59:48,629 --> 00:59:49,927
- OH.
- I HAVE AN IDEA.
1367
00:59:49,929 --> 00:59:52,163
OH, NO. OH, NO.
1368
00:59:52,165 --> 00:59:53,499
[LEAH]
HEY, HONEY!
1369
00:59:53,501 --> 00:59:55,601
WHAT WERE YOU AND GRANDPA
TALKING ABOUT?
1370
00:59:55,603 --> 00:59:58,202
OH, I GET IT,
BOY'S CLUB STUFF.
1371
00:59:58,204 --> 01:00:00,371
OKAY, WELL, THERE IS CHILI
IN THE KITCHEN
1372
01:00:00,373 --> 01:00:01,639
IF YOU'RE HUNGRY.
1373
01:00:01,641 --> 01:00:04,941
- ARE YOU EATING?
- NO, I'M GOING OUT.
1374
01:00:04,943 --> 01:00:06,910
- WHERE?
- UM, I DON'T KNOW,
1375
01:00:06,912 --> 01:00:08,445
I'M WAITING FOR A SWIPE.
1376
01:00:08,447 --> 01:00:09,946
MOM, I NEED TO TELL YOU
SOMETHING.
1377
01:00:09,948 --> 01:00:11,048
- [PHONE CHIMES]
- OH! I GOT A SWIPE!
1378
01:00:11,050 --> 01:00:12,882
NO, MOM,
DON'T TOUCH YOUR PHONE,
1379
01:00:12,884 --> 01:00:15,184
DON'T GO OUT TONIGHT,
OKAY?
1380
01:00:15,186 --> 01:00:17,553
HONEY, YOU'RE GOING BACK
TO SCHOOL,
1381
01:00:17,555 --> 01:00:20,956
I HAVE TO MEET PEOPLE,
I...
1382
01:00:20,958 --> 01:00:23,461
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
1383
01:00:29,032 --> 01:00:31,299
ANYWAYS, SHE'S CRAZY.
1384
01:00:31,301 --> 01:00:34,101
HEY, BUT BACK TO WHAT
I WAS SAYING,
1385
01:00:34,103 --> 01:00:37,938
WE ARE PLANNING TO RELEASE
A FULL BLOWN...
1386
01:00:37,940 --> 01:00:39,239
- PUN INTENDED...
- [LAUGHS]
1387
01:00:39,241 --> 01:00:40,908
VERSION OF THE APP
IN THE SPRING, OKAY?
1388
01:00:40,910 --> 01:00:43,042
AND WE ARE ACTUALLY EXPECTED
TO BE VALUED AT AROUND,
1389
01:00:43,044 --> 01:00:45,912
I DON'T KNOW,
$250,000,000.
1390
01:00:45,914 --> 01:00:48,548
WHOO, AND THAT IS WHEN WE'RE
GONNA TAKE IT PUBLIC,
1391
01:00:48,550 --> 01:00:49,851
LADIES AND GENTLEMAN.
1392
01:00:54,422 --> 01:00:56,489
♪ YOU COULD BE MY LOVE
1393
01:00:56,491 --> 01:00:58,624
♪ STANDING IN THE LIGHT
1394
01:00:58,626 --> 01:01:02,461
♪ WAVING TO THE PEOPLE
TO SAVE OUR LIFE ♪
1395
01:01:02,463 --> 01:01:07,466
♪ I REMEMBER WHEN
SHE WOULD ALWAYS SAY ♪
1396
01:01:07,468 --> 01:01:09,200
YOU MAY WANT TO CALL
AN EXTERMINATOR FIRST, DUDE.
1397
01:01:09,202 --> 01:01:10,601
THE APP HAS SOME BUGS
1398
01:01:10,603 --> 01:01:13,337
NO, NO, THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE,
ACTUALLY.
1399
01:01:13,339 --> 01:01:14,705
NO, MM-MM.
1400
01:01:14,707 --> 01:01:17,207
THE APP IS DOWN, MAN,
CHECK IT OUT.
1401
01:01:17,209 --> 01:01:18,509
HEY, JAMES!
1402
01:01:18,511 --> 01:01:20,678
CAN YOU COME SEE
IF YOU CAN FIX THIS?
1403
01:01:20,680 --> 01:01:23,513
[JAMES]
FIX WHAT?
1404
01:01:23,515 --> 01:01:25,582
MY PHONE ISN'T WORKING.
1405
01:01:25,584 --> 01:01:27,282
I WAS ABOUT TO GET
THE ADDRESS OF WHERE
1406
01:01:27,284 --> 01:01:29,686
I WAS GONNA MEET UP
AND THEN IT JUST... IT'S GONE.
1407
01:01:29,688 --> 01:01:31,120
UH...
[CHUCKLES]
1408
01:01:31,122 --> 01:01:34,056
...ACTUALLY, NO,
NO, THE APP IS NOT DOWN.
1409
01:01:34,058 --> 01:01:36,425
WE'RE JUST WORKING ON AN
UPDATE, SOME BACK-END SHIT.
1410
01:01:36,427 --> 01:01:38,494
IT'LL BE UP REAL SOON.
A COUPLE OF DAYS AT THE MOST.
1411
01:01:38,496 --> 01:01:41,429
PROGRAM MUST BE DOWN.
1412
01:01:41,431 --> 01:01:43,364
WELL, I'LL JUST GO ON
ONE OF THE OTHER APPS, RIGHT?
1413
01:01:43,366 --> 01:01:45,566
I'LL JUST USE SOME OF
THE OTHER APPS.
1414
01:01:45,568 --> 01:01:48,369
THE OTHER APPS.
1415
01:01:48,371 --> 01:01:50,738
YEAH, EXCEPT THEY'RE DOWN TOO.
1416
01:01:50,740 --> 01:01:52,038
WHAT'S WRONG.
1417
01:01:52,040 --> 01:01:53,540
- THE APP.
- THE APP'S NOT WORKING.
1418
01:01:53,542 --> 01:01:54,674
- NO.
- IT'S NOT?
1419
01:01:54,676 --> 01:01:56,176
NO, IS YOURS?
1420
01:01:56,178 --> 01:01:58,010
HEY, UH, DID ANY OF OUR GUYS
TAKE DOWN
1421
01:01:58,012 --> 01:01:59,345
ALL THE HOOK-UP APPS,
BY CHANCE?
1422
01:01:59,347 --> 01:02:01,347
MY PLANS FOR THE NIGHT
TOTALLY RUINED.
1423
01:02:01,349 --> 01:02:04,016
THAT WOULD BE
SOME SERIOUS DISRUPTION.
1424
01:02:04,018 --> 01:02:07,051
JAMES, HONEY,
IT IS THE DARNDEST THING.
1425
01:02:07,053 --> 01:02:09,120
LIKE, I TOUCH IT,
AND IT DOES NOTHING.
1426
01:02:09,122 --> 01:02:10,989
IT JUST DOES NOTHING.
1427
01:02:10,991 --> 01:02:12,257
COULD YOU PLEASE FIX THIS?
1428
01:02:12,259 --> 01:02:15,059
MOM, I'M FIXING IT,
TRUST ME, OKAY?
1429
01:02:15,061 --> 01:02:16,561
I'M FIXING EVERYTHING.
1430
01:02:16,563 --> 01:02:18,430
CALL JAMES RIGHT NOW!
PRONTO!
1431
01:02:18,432 --> 01:02:20,130
YEAH, I WILL!
I NEED YOU TO STOP STRESSING.
1432
01:02:20,132 --> 01:02:21,398
- WE'VE TALKED ABOUT THIS.
- I'M SORRY.
1433
01:02:21,400 --> 01:02:23,100
EVERYTHING IS FINE,
YOU CAN RELAX.
1434
01:02:23,102 --> 01:02:24,168
DID YOU PUT SOMETHING IN THIS?
1435
01:02:24,170 --> 01:02:27,640
YEAH. I'M CALLING HIM.
JAMES...
1436
01:02:35,046 --> 01:02:39,047
MOM, UH...
1437
01:02:39,049 --> 01:02:40,483
LOOK, I JUST WANT
TO LET YOU KNOW
1438
01:02:40,485 --> 01:02:44,453
THAT I SEE WHAT YOU'RE DOING
FOR ME AND ASHLEY.
1439
01:02:44,455 --> 01:02:46,521
TRYING TO BE FRIENDS
WITH DAD
1440
01:02:46,523 --> 01:02:48,523
SO THAT WE DON'T FEEL LIKE
WE'VE LOST OUR FAMILY,
1441
01:02:48,525 --> 01:02:50,592
BUT I JUST WANT TO LET
YOU KNOW THAT IT'S OKAY
1442
01:02:50,594 --> 01:02:52,326
IF YOU WANT TO BE MAD AT HIM,
1443
01:02:52,328 --> 01:02:56,030
AND IT'S OKAY IF YOU WANT
TO START A NEW LIFE.
1444
01:02:56,032 --> 01:02:57,665
NOTHING'LL CHANGE BETWEEN US.
1445
01:02:57,667 --> 01:03:02,570
THANKS, GUYS.
1446
01:03:02,572 --> 01:03:05,806
I NEEDED TO HEAR THAT.
OH! WAIT!
1447
01:03:05,808 --> 01:03:08,107
I JUST WANT TO LET YOU KNOW
I'M MOVING BACK IN
1448
01:03:08,109 --> 01:03:09,676
- TO YOUR BEDROOM.
- VIRGIN.
1449
01:03:09,678 --> 01:03:14,048
OCD. BUT I MIGHT MISS YOU
A LITTLE.
1450
01:03:16,450 --> 01:03:18,417
HERE IT IS.
IT'S TEA.
1451
01:03:18,419 --> 01:03:19,785
VERY SPECIAL CHINESE
HERBAL TEA.
1452
01:03:19,787 --> 01:03:21,386
IT WILL HELP YOU RELAX,
1453
01:03:21,388 --> 01:03:23,489
AND IT'LL HELP YOU GET
A GREAT NIGHT'S SLEEP.
1454
01:03:23,491 --> 01:03:25,623
TAKE IT.
BUT DON'T TAKE TOO MUCH.
1455
01:03:25,625 --> 01:03:26,825
I MEAN, IT'S ALL-NATURAL,
BUT I DON'T KNOW
1456
01:03:26,827 --> 01:03:28,294
HOW STRONG IT IS.
1457
01:03:30,630 --> 01:03:33,129
BYE, SWEETIE.
1458
01:03:33,131 --> 01:03:36,834
[PHONE RINGING]
1459
01:03:36,836 --> 01:03:39,269
WHO'S CALLING YOU?
1460
01:03:39,271 --> 01:03:41,271
I DON'T KNOW.
1461
01:03:41,273 --> 01:03:44,273
MUST BE IMPORTANT,
IT'S RINGING NON-STOP.
1462
01:03:44,275 --> 01:03:46,611
UH, YEAH.
YEAH, IT IS.
1463
01:03:50,147 --> 01:03:52,180
- YO!
- HEY!
1464
01:03:52,182 --> 01:03:53,449
- [POUNDING ON DOOR]
- [LANCE] "JUNGLE" IS STILL DOWN, DUDE!
1465
01:03:53,451 --> 01:03:54,850
WHAT'S GOING ON?
1466
01:03:54,852 --> 01:03:57,151
YOU ARE NOT GONNA GET PAID
TO GET INTO M.I.T.
1467
01:03:57,153 --> 01:03:58,520
UNLESS IT'S UP
IN AN HOUR.
1468
01:03:58,522 --> 01:04:00,822
COME ON, JAMES,
THIS IS KIND OF AN EMERGENCY.
1469
01:04:00,824 --> 01:04:03,324
- [POUNDING ON DOOR]
- [WESLEY] YEAH, THE OTHER HOOK-UP APPS ARE STILL DOWN.
1470
01:04:03,326 --> 01:04:04,459
[DANIEL] HEY, WE'RE GONNA
TIE YOU TO THE DESK
1471
01:04:04,461 --> 01:04:06,796
UNTIL YOU FIX THIS, BRO!
1472
01:04:08,731 --> 01:04:11,665
WELL, I CAN UNLOCK IT
WITH THIS.
1473
01:04:11,667 --> 01:04:13,800
HOW THE HELL DID YOU
LEARN HOW TO LOCK PICK?
1474
01:04:13,802 --> 01:04:15,201
MY CELLMATE TAUGHT ME.
1475
01:04:15,203 --> 01:04:17,236
- OH, THERE WE GO!
- WHOA-HO-HO!
1476
01:04:17,238 --> 01:04:18,638
CELLMATE? WHAT?
1477
01:04:18,640 --> 01:04:22,343
[POLICE SIRENS WAILING]
1478
01:04:28,448 --> 01:04:29,614
HANNAH! HANNAH!
1479
01:04:29,616 --> 01:04:30,782
JAMES, WHY ARE YOU RUNNING?
1480
01:04:30,784 --> 01:04:32,183
I'M TRYING TO RUN
FROM MY ROOMMATE
1481
01:04:32,185 --> 01:04:33,184
AND I NEED A PLACE TO STAY,
PLEASE.
1482
01:04:33,186 --> 01:04:34,519
- LANCE?
- YES.
1483
01:04:34,521 --> 01:04:35,554
OKAY, YOU BET
I'M HELPING YOU WITH THIS.
1484
01:04:35,556 --> 01:04:37,123
- FOLLOW ME.
- OKAY.
1485
01:04:45,898 --> 01:04:47,598
WAIT, HANNAH, HANNAH.
1486
01:04:47,600 --> 01:04:49,900
UM, ONE DAY I'M GONNA
DO SOMETHING
1487
01:04:49,902 --> 01:04:51,568
THAT'LL EARN
YOUR TRUST BACK.
1488
01:04:51,570 --> 01:04:53,670
JAMES, YOU DON'T HAVE
TO DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT.
1489
01:04:53,672 --> 01:04:56,639
- I'M OKAY WITH HELPING YOU.
- WHY?
1490
01:04:56,641 --> 01:04:58,675
WHY AM I OKAY
WITH HELPING YOU?
1491
01:04:58,677 --> 01:05:02,411
NO, WHY ARE YOU SO SHY?
1492
01:05:02,413 --> 01:05:06,315
IT'S OKAY.
YOU CAN TELL ME.
1493
01:05:06,317 --> 01:05:09,250
JAMES, I HAD A REALLY
BAD STUTTER,
1494
01:05:09,252 --> 01:05:11,786
AND WHEN I GET NERVOUS
AND I TRY TO TALK
1495
01:05:11,788 --> 01:05:13,821
IN FRONT OF A LOT OF PEOPLE
SOMETIMES IT COMES BACK,
1496
01:05:13,823 --> 01:05:16,292
AND I DON'T KNOW
HOW TO STOP IT.
1497
01:05:18,528 --> 01:05:21,595
IS THAT WHY YOU DON'T
TALK MUCH IN CLASS
1498
01:05:21,597 --> 01:05:23,797
EVEN THOUGH
YOU KNOW ALL THE ANSWERS?
1499
01:05:23,799 --> 01:05:25,767
YEAH.
1500
01:05:30,304 --> 01:05:31,773
- HI.
- HI.
1501
01:05:33,307 --> 01:05:34,840
WHAT ARE YOU TWO
DOING TOGETHER?
1502
01:05:34,842 --> 01:05:36,942
OKAY, LOOK, JAMES NEEDS
A PLACE TO HIDE.
1503
01:05:36,944 --> 01:05:39,745
ONLY FOR A FEW HOURS,
HOPEFULLY.
1504
01:05:39,747 --> 01:05:42,614
MAYBE HE CAN HELP US STUDY?
1505
01:05:42,616 --> 01:05:44,882
HAVE A BETTER IDEA,
1506
01:05:44,884 --> 01:05:48,386
IF YOU MAKE US AN APP,
LIKE, "JUNGLE FOR GIRLS"
1507
01:05:48,388 --> 01:05:50,688
I JUST MIGHT LET YOU
STAY HERE.
1508
01:05:50,690 --> 01:05:52,289
IT'S A GOOD IDEA.
1509
01:05:52,291 --> 01:05:53,724
"JUNGLE" REALLY
MESSED ME UP.
1510
01:05:53,726 --> 01:05:55,559
GUYS, WE KNOW THAT LANCE
MADE "JUNGLE"
1511
01:05:55,561 --> 01:05:57,227
AND WE'RE GONNA MAKE HIM
REGRET IT.
1512
01:05:57,229 --> 01:06:00,797
YES, AND I'M KIND OF
RETIRING FROM APPS FOR NOW.
1513
01:06:00,799 --> 01:06:02,598
OKAY, SO THE ANSWER IS NO.
1514
01:06:02,600 --> 01:06:04,700
I MEAN, RIGHT AFTER
I MAKE YOUR APP.
1515
01:06:04,702 --> 01:06:06,302
I THOUGHT HE WAS FIXING
"JUNGLE."
1516
01:06:06,304 --> 01:06:07,970
YEAH, THAT'S WHAT HE SAID
HE WAS DOING, MAN.
1517
01:06:07,972 --> 01:06:10,773
WHERE IS HE, LANCE?
THIS IS KIND OF AN EMERGENCY.
1518
01:06:10,775 --> 01:06:13,441
YEAH, THE OTHER HOOK-UP APPS
ARE STILL DOWN.
1519
01:06:13,443 --> 01:06:15,910
OH, THIS IS BAD,
THIS IS REALLY BAD.
1520
01:06:15,912 --> 01:06:17,479
SHOULD WE CALL 9-1-1?
1521
01:06:17,481 --> 01:06:20,149
THIS IS COMPLICATED SHIT.
HOLY CRAP!
1522
01:06:22,886 --> 01:06:25,219
- ARE YOU GONNA EAT THAT?
- YEAH.
1523
01:06:25,221 --> 01:06:28,422
WELL, THERE'S MOLD ON IT
SO BE CAREFUL, BUD.
1524
01:06:28,424 --> 01:06:30,758
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
- I'M JUST THINKING
1525
01:06:30,760 --> 01:06:32,425
OF MAYBE WE DO SOME WAY
TO ORGANIZE
1526
01:06:32,427 --> 01:06:33,894
ALL OF THIS INFORMATION.
1527
01:06:33,896 --> 01:06:37,230
- MAYBE REBUILD, OR...
- YOU'RE GONNA REBUILD THE APP?
1528
01:06:37,232 --> 01:06:38,998
I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE I'LL HIRE
SOMEONE TO DO IT, MAN. YEAH.
1529
01:06:39,000 --> 01:06:41,534
[LAUGHS]
1530
01:06:41,536 --> 01:06:43,002
COME ON, MAN!
IT'S MY CONCEPT,
1531
01:06:43,004 --> 01:06:45,506
THIS IS FREAKING APP,
IT'S JUST...
1532
01:06:50,644 --> 01:06:53,779
ALL RIGHT, LADIES, SO JAMES
IS HERE BECAUSE HE HAS AGREED
1533
01:06:53,781 --> 01:06:57,648
TO CREATE A RELATIONSHIP APP
FOR YOU GUYS, SO...
1534
01:06:57,650 --> 01:06:59,252
OKAY.
1535
01:07:01,821 --> 01:07:05,455
OKAY. UM...
1536
01:07:05,457 --> 01:07:09,392
GIRLS, HOW YOU DOING?
ARE YOU HAPPY?
1537
01:07:09,394 --> 01:07:12,429
I MEAN,
I LIKED MY CHRISTMAS PRESENTS.
1538
01:07:12,431 --> 01:07:14,698
I MEAN, ARE YOU SATISFIED
WITH LIFE?
1539
01:07:14,700 --> 01:07:16,765
I HAVE TO STUDY FOR A TEST.
SORRY.
1540
01:07:16,767 --> 01:07:20,602
HOW'S YOUR LOVE LIFE?
1541
01:07:20,604 --> 01:07:23,672
BY LOVE, I MEAN LOVE.
1542
01:07:23,674 --> 01:07:26,842
NOT SEX.
1543
01:07:26,844 --> 01:07:30,712
HONESTLY?
NOT TOO GOOD.
1544
01:07:30,714 --> 01:07:33,514
MINE'S GREAT.
I'M NEVER LONELY.
1545
01:07:33,516 --> 01:07:35,415
INVITED OUT EVERY NIGHT.
1546
01:07:35,417 --> 01:07:39,053
HE SAID LOVE, NOT SEX.
ZIP IT, HOOK.
1547
01:07:39,055 --> 01:07:42,322
DO YOU FEEL LIKE GUYS ARE USING
YOU AS JUST A PIECE OF MEAT?
1548
01:07:42,324 --> 01:07:44,858
- THAT'S EXACTLY HOW I FEEL.
- ARE YOU A PSYCH MAJOR?
1549
01:07:44,860 --> 01:07:48,728
DO YOU WANT A GUY TO PURSUE YOU FOR
MORE THAN JUST A SWIPE OF HIS FINGER?
1550
01:07:48,730 --> 01:07:50,429
[TOGETHER]
YEAH.
1551
01:07:50,431 --> 01:07:53,032
ARE YOU SELLING SOME
SPECIAL MAKEUP OR SOMETHING?
1552
01:07:53,034 --> 01:07:54,867
OR UNDERWEAR?
1553
01:07:54,869 --> 01:07:57,803
NO, I'M NOT SELLING A SPECIAL
KIND OF MAKEUP OR UNDERWEAR.
1554
01:07:57,805 --> 01:08:00,572
I'M TRYING
TO TURN THINGS AROUND.
1555
01:08:00,574 --> 01:08:02,941
GIRLS, I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU
GET YOUR POWER BACK.
1556
01:08:02,943 --> 01:08:04,809
WHAT KIND OF POWER
IS HE TALKING ABOUT?
1557
01:08:04,811 --> 01:08:06,811
I DON'T KNOW,
BUT MAYBE HE'S ONTO SOMETHING.
1558
01:08:06,813 --> 01:08:10,314
LOOK, MY SPECIALTY
IS ALGORITHMS.
1559
01:08:10,316 --> 01:08:11,882
NOW, I KNOW THAT MAY NOT
SOUND LIKE MUCH,
1560
01:08:11,884 --> 01:08:16,352
BUT IN FACT ALGORITHMS
AND BIOLOGY WORK HAND IN HAND.
1561
01:08:16,354 --> 01:08:18,354
I HAVE THIS APP
AND I'D LIKE TO GIVE IT TO YOU.
1562
01:08:18,356 --> 01:08:19,990
I KNEW HE WAS
SELLING SOMETHING.
1563
01:08:19,992 --> 01:08:22,425
NO, I'M NOT SELLING ANYTHING.
I'M HERE TO GIVE, NOT SELL.
1564
01:08:22,427 --> 01:08:24,961
- SO WHAT'S THE CATCH?
- THE CATCH IS...
1565
01:08:24,963 --> 01:08:28,530
THAT IF I GIVE THIS APP TO YOU
AND EXPLAIN TO YOU HOW IT WORKS,
1566
01:08:28,532 --> 01:08:31,600
THEN IT'S UP TO YOU
TO LET IT WORK.
1567
01:08:31,602 --> 01:08:33,435
WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?
1568
01:08:33,437 --> 01:08:34,770
SEE, IT MEANS THAT
WHEN YOU'RE DATING A GUY...
1569
01:08:34,772 --> 01:08:38,439
SWEETHEART,
LET ME STOP YOU RIGHT THERE.
1570
01:08:38,441 --> 01:08:40,841
NONE OF US
HAVE BEEN ON A DATE.
1571
01:08:40,843 --> 01:08:42,877
- WELL, SINCE WHEN?
- SINCE EVER.
1572
01:08:42,879 --> 01:08:43,978
NONE OF YOU?
1573
01:08:43,980 --> 01:08:45,980
GUYS NOWADAYS
DON'T DATE YOU.
1574
01:08:45,982 --> 01:08:48,414
- THEY JUST SLEEP WITH YOU.
- THEN LET'S CHANGE THAT.
1575
01:08:48,416 --> 01:08:50,951
- HOW?
- WITH MY APP
1576
01:08:50,953 --> 01:08:53,419
AND WITH YOUR COOPERATION.
1577
01:08:53,421 --> 01:08:54,921
AND THE COOPERATION
OF YOUR SISTERS
1578
01:08:54,923 --> 01:08:56,458
ON EVERY COLLEGE CAMPUS.
1579
01:09:00,061 --> 01:09:02,761
HANNAH? WHAT DO YOU THINK
OF THE IDEA?
1580
01:09:02,763 --> 01:09:06,131
DO YOU LIKE IT?
1581
01:09:06,133 --> 01:09:11,003
HONESTLY, NO, I DON'T.
1582
01:09:11,005 --> 01:09:15,074
I DON'T THINK THAT AN APP IS THE
PROPER SOLUTION FOR RELATIONSHIPS.
1583
01:09:17,610 --> 01:09:20,644
I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE I WAS JUST
BORN IN THE WRONG CENTURY.
1584
01:09:20,646 --> 01:09:22,445
[WOMAN]
I AGREE.
1585
01:09:22,447 --> 01:09:24,883
[WOMAN 2] NO WONDER YOU HAVE
NO CLUE WHAT'S GOING ON.
1586
01:09:30,856 --> 01:09:32,388
[DANIEL]
OH, THERE HE IS.
1587
01:09:32,390 --> 01:09:34,757
- HEY, GUYS.
- WHERE YOU BEEN, MAN?
1588
01:09:34,759 --> 01:09:36,759
UH, MEETING.
1589
01:09:36,761 --> 01:09:38,727
HEY, YOU'RE GROUNDED
UNTIL "JUNGLE" IS FIXED
1590
01:09:38,729 --> 01:09:40,428
- WHAT?
- YEP.
1591
01:09:40,430 --> 01:09:41,964
I'M TRYING TO GET IT BACK UP,
GUYS.
1592
01:09:41,966 --> 01:09:43,765
I CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT.
1593
01:09:43,767 --> 01:09:46,168
WHILE YOU'RE HAVING A HARD TIME,
I'M GETTING DEATH THREATS
1594
01:09:46,170 --> 01:09:47,969
FOR TAKING DOWN
THE HOOKUP APPS.
1595
01:09:47,971 --> 01:09:49,906
PEOPLE THINK I DID IT
AS A PUBLICITY STUNT.
1596
01:09:54,177 --> 01:09:56,977
THEY THINK
THAT HE BUILT THE APP
1597
01:09:56,979 --> 01:09:58,979
'CAUSE HE DIDN'T.
THAT'S WHY IT'S FUNNY.
1598
01:09:58,981 --> 01:10:00,514
THEY THINK
THAT I BUILT "JUNGLE."
1599
01:10:00,516 --> 01:10:01,915
THEY THINK THAT
I CAN TAKE DOWN THE HOOKUP APPS.
1600
01:10:01,917 --> 01:10:03,116
YEAH, YOU DIDN'T BUILD
"JUNGLE," THOUGH.
1601
01:10:03,118 --> 01:10:04,717
NO, I CREATED IT.
IT WAS MY IDEA.
1602
01:10:04,719 --> 01:10:07,720
SHH.
1603
01:10:07,722 --> 01:10:10,957
JAMES, YOU NEED TO GET "JUNGLE"
BACK UP RIGHT NOW.
1604
01:10:10,959 --> 01:10:14,126
OUR LIVES ARE ON THE LINE
RIGHT NOW, OKAY?
1605
01:10:14,128 --> 01:10:16,461
AND ANOTHER THING.
DON'T JUDGE ME.
1606
01:10:16,463 --> 01:10:18,530
I'M STRESS EATING.
IT'S A REAL DISORDER.
1607
01:10:18,532 --> 01:10:19,965
GOOGLE IT.
1608
01:10:19,967 --> 01:10:21,666
OKAY, CALM DOWN.
1609
01:10:21,668 --> 01:10:24,768
WE'RE JUST GONNA
TAKE A CHILL PILL.
1610
01:10:24,770 --> 01:10:27,905
GUYS, IF YOU WANT ME TO DO THIS,
I'M GONNA NEED MY ROOM BACK.
1611
01:10:27,907 --> 01:10:29,773
NO, WE ARE GOING
TO SIT RIGHT HERE
1612
01:10:29,775 --> 01:10:31,775
AND WATCH YOU
UNTIL YOU GET THIS DONE.
1613
01:10:31,777 --> 01:10:33,610
OKAY, IF YOU WANNA GET PAID
FOR M.I.T.,
1614
01:10:33,612 --> 01:10:35,812
THEN YOU BETTER GET THIS THING
BACK UP AND RUNNING, STAT.
1615
01:10:35,814 --> 01:10:36,981
NO, I CAN'T WORK LIKE THIS.
1616
01:10:36,983 --> 01:10:38,648
YOU'RE GONNA SIT RIGHT THERE
1617
01:10:38,650 --> 01:10:39,816
AND YOU'RE GONNA WORK.
1618
01:10:39,818 --> 01:10:41,618
[IMITATES WHIP CRACK]
1619
01:10:41,620 --> 01:10:44,553
RIGHT NOW.
GO AHEAD.
1620
01:10:44,555 --> 01:10:46,690
VAMOS. OH, NO,
I'LL TAKE THAT.
1621
01:10:52,229 --> 01:10:55,163
ALL RIGHT,
GET TO WORK.
1622
01:10:55,165 --> 01:10:57,665
NO, STOP IT.
SPIT IT OUT.
1623
01:10:57,667 --> 01:11:00,968
YOU HAVE ANY MORE?
AH. GOSH, YOU'RE SO WEIRD.
1624
01:11:00,970 --> 01:11:02,670
- LANCE?
- YES.
1625
01:11:02,672 --> 01:11:04,774
I'D LIKE SOME TEA PLEASE.
WITH HONEY.
1626
01:11:07,043 --> 01:11:08,708
YEAH, OKAY.
1627
01:11:08,710 --> 01:11:11,111
I MAKE HIM TEA AND HONEY
SO THAT HE CAN WORK.
1628
01:11:11,113 --> 01:11:13,747
YOU KNOW? HE'S SICK,
SO I DON'T WANT HIM TO...
1629
01:11:13,749 --> 01:11:15,918
- THAT'S CUTE.
- I'D DO IT FOR YOU GUYS.
1630
01:11:18,886 --> 01:11:20,586
I'D LIKE THIS ONE, PLEASE.
1631
01:11:20,588 --> 01:11:22,254
MY MOM GAVE IT TO ME
1632
01:11:22,256 --> 01:11:24,123
SO I CAN STAY UP LATE
AT NIGHT.
1633
01:11:24,125 --> 01:11:25,691
IT KEEPS ME UP
SO I CAN STUDY.
1634
01:11:25,693 --> 01:11:28,160
- ALL RIGHT.
- OH, DOUBLE STRENGTH, PLEASE.
1635
01:11:28,162 --> 01:11:30,862
YOU KNOW.
I WANNA GET THIS DONE TONIGHT.
1636
01:11:30,864 --> 01:11:32,530
OKAY.
1637
01:11:32,532 --> 01:11:37,068
LANCE.
I'LL TAKE ONE, TOO.
1638
01:11:37,070 --> 01:11:38,769
JUST SO I CAN STAY UP,
1639
01:11:38,771 --> 01:11:42,606
BE ALERT,
READY TO POUNCE.
1640
01:11:42,608 --> 01:11:44,975
[SNAPS FINGERS]
ACTUALLY, SIGN ME UP, TOO.
1641
01:11:44,977 --> 01:11:49,246
I WANT ONE. AND SOME COFFEE.
AND SOME DONUTS.
1642
01:11:49,248 --> 01:11:52,682
RIGHT. YOU WANT ME TO THROW ON AN
APRON AND A STRING OF PEARLS, TOO?
1643
01:11:52,684 --> 01:11:54,884
AS LONG AS THE APRON SAYS
"HOME, SWEET HOME."
1644
01:11:54,886 --> 01:11:57,585
- YEAH?
- YEAH.
1645
01:11:57,587 --> 01:12:00,224
- YOU GUYS ARE RIDICULOUS. JUST WATCH HIM, OKAY?
- [DANIEL] YEAH.
1646
01:12:52,005 --> 01:12:53,505
[PASSES GAS]
1647
01:12:55,173 --> 01:12:59,876
OH, SHIT. HEY, WESLEY.
1648
01:12:59,878 --> 01:13:01,610
HE'S GONE. WESLEY!
1649
01:13:01,612 --> 01:13:03,113
[MUMBLES]
1650
01:13:03,115 --> 01:13:04,247
HE'S GONE.
1651
01:13:04,249 --> 01:13:06,083
- HUH?
- HE'S GONE.
1652
01:13:08,085 --> 01:13:09,785
- WAKE UP!
- OH, WHAT?
1653
01:13:09,787 --> 01:13:13,224
- HE GOT OUT!
- COME ON, DUDE!
1654
01:13:20,096 --> 01:13:23,764
HEY. LOOK. IT LOOKS LIKE I'M
GONNA HAVE TO STAY THE NIGHT.
1655
01:13:23,766 --> 01:13:25,233
- WHAT DID I TELL YOU?
- WHAT?
1656
01:13:25,235 --> 01:13:27,335
WE HAD A BET ON HOW LONG
IT WOULD TAKE FOR YOU
1657
01:13:27,337 --> 01:13:29,036
TO TRY TO SLEEP
WITH ONE OF US,
1658
01:13:29,038 --> 01:13:31,071
ESPECIALLY AFTER YOUR
PHONY SPEECH AND ALL.
1659
01:13:31,073 --> 01:13:33,672
WHAT? NO, THE SPEECH, THE APP,
IT WAS ALL REAL.
1660
01:13:33,674 --> 01:13:36,809
- WHAT DO YOU WANT?
- I JUST NEED A PLACE TO STAY FOR THE NIGHT.
1661
01:13:36,811 --> 01:13:39,145
SO, WAIT A MINUTE.
1662
01:13:39,147 --> 01:13:40,379
YOU DON'T WANNA
SLEEP WITH ME?
1663
01:13:40,381 --> 01:13:42,647
NO, I NEVER...
NO, I DON'T... I REALLY...
1664
01:13:42,649 --> 01:13:44,150
I TOLD YOU HE WAS GAY.
1665
01:13:44,152 --> 01:13:46,951
I'M NOT GAY. WHY DOES
EVERYBODY HERE THINK THAT?
1666
01:13:46,953 --> 01:13:48,955
- YOU LIKE GIRLS?
- YES, I LIKE...
1667
01:13:51,858 --> 01:13:53,559
I LIKE HANNAH.
1668
01:13:56,695 --> 01:13:58,729
HEY, IT'S ALL SETTLED.
1669
01:13:58,731 --> 01:13:59,897
HE CAN STAY.
1670
01:13:59,899 --> 01:14:01,832
- COME ON.
- THANK YOU.
1671
01:14:01,834 --> 01:14:03,934
SERIOUSLY, LOOK,
I DON'T TAKE UP MUCH SPACE.
1672
01:14:03,936 --> 01:14:06,070
I JUST NEED MAYBE
A CLOSET OR SOMETHING.
1673
01:14:06,072 --> 01:14:07,904
IT'S NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL.
1674
01:14:07,906 --> 01:14:10,273
NO, THERE'S
A GUEST ROOM UPSTAIRS.
1675
01:14:10,275 --> 01:14:11,240
SERIOUSLY?
1676
01:14:11,242 --> 01:14:12,341
IF YOU NEED ANYTHING,
1677
01:14:12,343 --> 01:14:14,709
AND I DO MEAN ANYTHING,
1678
01:14:14,711 --> 01:14:16,912
HANNAH WILL HELP YOU.
1679
01:14:16,914 --> 01:14:20,148
LOOK, AND IF ANYONE
COMES LOOKING FOR ME,
1680
01:14:20,150 --> 01:14:21,249
DON'T LET THEM IN.
1681
01:14:21,251 --> 01:14:23,185
I WON'T LET ANYONE IN.
1682
01:14:23,187 --> 01:14:24,354
GOOD NIGHT, HANNAH.
1683
01:14:25,923 --> 01:14:27,890
GOOD NIGHT, JAMES.
1684
01:14:28,925 --> 01:14:30,660
OH, UH, HANNAH.
1685
01:14:34,964 --> 01:14:38,767
I'M... JAMES WILSON SINGER.
1686
01:14:40,135 --> 01:14:42,137
JAMES WILSON SINGER.
1687
01:14:44,139 --> 01:14:45,340
I LIKE THAT.
1688
01:14:47,409 --> 01:14:51,076
GOOD.
WHAT'S YOUR MIDDLE NAME?
1689
01:14:51,078 --> 01:14:53,347
I'M HANNAH GRACE MARTIN.
1690
01:14:55,082 --> 01:14:57,382
THAT FITS YOU.
1691
01:14:57,384 --> 01:14:59,418
KIND OF EMBODIES YOUR EYES
1692
01:14:59,420 --> 01:15:03,054
AND YOUR HAIR AND YOUR HANDS
ALL IN ONE SENTENCE.
1693
01:15:03,056 --> 01:15:05,724
IT'S... I DON'T KNOW,
LIKE A SONG.
1694
01:15:09,928 --> 01:15:11,362
GOOD NIGHT, JAMES.
1695
01:15:11,364 --> 01:15:14,933
GOOD NIGHT.
THANK YOU.
1696
01:15:20,838 --> 01:15:23,239
SO WHY CAN'T WE
LET THEM IN?
1697
01:15:23,241 --> 01:15:24,974
BECAUSE THEY WANT
TO KILL HIM.
1698
01:15:24,976 --> 01:15:26,375
YEAH, WE GOTTA
KEEP HIM ALIVE
1699
01:15:26,377 --> 01:15:28,477
SO HE CAN HELP US
FINISH THE APP
1700
01:15:28,479 --> 01:15:31,380
AND TEACH US HOW TO TAKE
OUR POWER BACK.
1701
01:15:31,382 --> 01:15:33,014
WELL, I GUESS
HE CAN SHOW US
1702
01:15:33,016 --> 01:15:34,449
HOW TO MAKE GUYS
TALK TO US
1703
01:15:34,451 --> 01:15:36,484
LIKE HE DID TO YOU.
1704
01:15:36,486 --> 01:15:39,454
YOU KNOW, THIS SORORITY IS FINALLY
TAKING ON A WORTHWHILE PROJECT,
1705
01:15:39,456 --> 01:15:41,924
AND I FOR ONE AM EXCITED.
1706
01:15:45,494 --> 01:15:48,495
STOP! STOP!
STOP! STOP! STOP!
1707
01:15:48,497 --> 01:15:50,963
THERE HE IS,
RIGHT THERE IN THE WINDOW.
1708
01:15:50,965 --> 01:15:52,232
COME ON. LET'S GO.
1709
01:15:52,234 --> 01:15:54,468
GO! GO! GO! GO! GO!
1710
01:15:54,470 --> 01:15:56,269
[GRUNTING]
1711
01:15:56,271 --> 01:15:59,038
LET US IN.
1712
01:15:59,040 --> 01:16:01,006
HEY, HEY, HEY.
1713
01:16:01,008 --> 01:16:02,475
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
1714
01:16:02,477 --> 01:16:04,276
WE WANT JAMES.
1715
01:16:04,278 --> 01:16:05,844
BUT YOU CAN'T HAVE HIM.
1716
01:16:05,846 --> 01:16:08,413
CAN YOU JUST LET US
INTO THE HOUSE? PLEASE?
1717
01:16:08,415 --> 01:16:10,315
NO, I CAN'T
AND IF YOU DON'T LEAVE,
1718
01:16:10,317 --> 01:16:11,949
I'M GONNA CALL
CAMPUS SECURITY.
1719
01:16:11,951 --> 01:16:14,319
OH, REALLY? WELL,
WE HAVE A KEY TO THIS SORORITY.
1720
01:16:14,321 --> 01:16:16,387
ONE OF YOU BIMBOS GAVE IT TO ME,
IF YOU DON'T REMEMBER.
1721
01:16:16,389 --> 01:16:18,923
WELL, THEN COME RIGHT IN,
SWEETHEART.
1722
01:16:18,925 --> 01:16:21,458
[WESLEY WHIMPERING]
1723
01:16:21,460 --> 01:16:24,528
YOU WANT HIM,
COME AND GET HIM.
1724
01:16:24,530 --> 01:16:28,531
YOU KNOW WHAT? W-WE GOT
THIS THING WITH THE STUFF.
1725
01:16:28,533 --> 01:16:30,266
SO WE'RE GONNA
JUST HEAD OUT,
1726
01:16:30,268 --> 01:16:32,502
BUT IT'S GOOD TO
SEE YOU.
1727
01:16:32,504 --> 01:16:35,237
YOU KNOW WHAT? IT LOOKS LIKE YOU GIRLS
COULD USE YOUR BEAUTY SLEEP ANYWAY.
1728
01:16:35,239 --> 01:16:36,872
SO WE'RE JUST GONNA...
1729
01:16:36,874 --> 01:16:38,874
YOU LOOK...
YOU LOOK GOOD.
1730
01:16:38,876 --> 01:16:40,242
- WESLEY!
- [SCREAMS]
1731
01:16:40,244 --> 01:16:42,010
OKAY, LADIES,
1732
01:16:42,012 --> 01:16:43,911
HOW ABOUT
WE JUST TALK THIS OUT
1733
01:16:43,913 --> 01:16:45,046
OVER BREAKFAST TOMORROW ON ME.
1734
01:16:45,048 --> 01:16:46,448
COFFEE AND BAGELS, LANCE?
1735
01:16:46,450 --> 01:16:48,449
HOW ABOUT A GIFT CARD
TO BAGEL BOYS.
1736
01:16:48,451 --> 01:16:49,850
[LANCE]
THEY'RE INSANE. RUN!
1737
01:16:49,852 --> 01:16:52,255
- [SCREAMING]
- DANIEL: DON'T TOUCH ME!
1738
01:16:54,557 --> 01:16:56,426
COFFEE AND BAGELS.
1739
01:17:01,163 --> 01:17:04,397
WHAT DID YOU SHOCK ME
LIKE THAT FOR?
1740
01:17:04,399 --> 01:17:06,234
INTERNAL BLEEDING.
1741
01:17:09,036 --> 01:17:11,537
LANCE,
THOSE FEMALES HATE YOU.
1742
01:17:11,539 --> 01:17:14,275
THEY HATE US. NOT ME.
WHAT IS THAT?
1743
01:17:17,345 --> 01:17:18,943
OKAY, WHAT THE EFF
HAPPENED BACK THERE?
1744
01:17:18,945 --> 01:17:21,112
I MEAN, WHAT WAS THAT?
WHAT WERE THEY DOING?
1745
01:17:21,114 --> 01:17:22,981
I DON'T KNOW.
WHY YOU LOOKING AT ME?
1746
01:17:22,983 --> 01:17:24,015
I DON'T KNOW.
1747
01:17:24,017 --> 01:17:25,416
I KNOW.
1748
01:17:25,418 --> 01:17:27,284
WHAT... WHAT?
HOW DO YOU KNOW?
1749
01:17:27,286 --> 01:17:29,186
BRO, IT'S OBVIOUS.
OKAY?
1750
01:17:29,188 --> 01:17:31,154
ONE, ALL THE HOOKUP APPS
ARE DOWN.
1751
01:17:31,156 --> 01:17:33,390
TWO, JAMES IS NOW LIVING
IN A SORORITY HOUSE.
1752
01:17:33,392 --> 01:17:34,924
JUST PUT THEM TOGETHER.
1753
01:17:34,926 --> 01:17:36,493
YOU THINK THOSE
ARE ACTUALLY CONNECTED HERE?
1754
01:17:36,495 --> 01:17:38,261
OF COURSE.
1755
01:17:38,263 --> 01:17:40,096
OH, YEAH,
THERE'S A CONNECTION.
1756
01:17:40,098 --> 01:17:42,231
HE'S GOT ALL THE CHICKS,
AND WE DON'T.
1757
01:17:42,233 --> 01:17:44,267
WHAT IF HE'S JUST,
YOU KNOW,
1758
01:17:44,269 --> 01:17:46,402
WORKING ON SOMETHING
FOR US.
1759
01:17:46,404 --> 01:17:49,104
HE'S A GENIUS. THIS COULD BE SOMETHING
BIGGER AND BETTER FOR ALL OF US.
1760
01:17:49,106 --> 01:17:50,305
THAT'S STUPID, LANCE.
STUPID.
1761
01:17:50,307 --> 01:17:51,973
HE WANTS
ALL THE GIRLS TO HIMSELF.
1762
01:17:51,975 --> 01:17:53,441
HE'S GREEDY LIKE THAT.
1763
01:17:53,443 --> 01:17:55,477
OH, MY GOD.
THEY, LIKE, LOVE HIM.
1764
01:17:55,479 --> 01:17:57,044
I KNOW. DID YOU SEE
THE WAY THAT THEY
1765
01:17:57,046 --> 01:17:59,346
THREW THOSE WEAPONS OUT
JUST TO DEFEND HIM?
1766
01:17:59,348 --> 01:18:00,948
BRO, THOSE WEAPONS
WERE TO KILL US.
1767
01:18:00,950 --> 01:18:04,018
THAT HAIR BRUSH
WAS TO BEAT US, MAIM US.
1768
01:18:04,020 --> 01:18:06,919
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, I THINK
THOSE ARE THE SAME THING.
1769
01:18:06,921 --> 01:18:11,157
OKAY, LOOK.
WE NEED A NEW PLAN, OBVIOUSLY.
1770
01:18:11,159 --> 01:18:12,492
- FIGURE ONE OUT...
- SHH.
1771
01:18:12,494 --> 01:18:14,527
NO. NO, NO, NO,
YOU'RE DONE WITH THAT, OKAY?
1772
01:18:14,529 --> 01:18:16,362
JAMES IS NOW LIVING
IN THE SORORITY HOUSE.
1773
01:18:16,364 --> 01:18:17,563
WE CALL THEM
SORORITY SISTERS.
1774
01:18:17,565 --> 01:18:19,299
THEY'RE ALL OF
THE TEAM CAPTAINS.
1775
01:18:19,301 --> 01:18:20,866
ALL BY HIMSELF.
1776
01:18:20,868 --> 01:18:23,435
HE'S IN THERE
WITH ALL OF THEM BY HIMSELF.
1777
01:18:23,437 --> 01:18:25,971
AND GUESS WHERE WE ARE?
WE'RE OUT HERE.
1778
01:18:25,973 --> 01:18:27,406
AS A RESULT OF YOUR PLAN,
LANCE,
1779
01:18:27,408 --> 01:18:30,910
WE'RE IN ICE.
FRIGID COLD. OKAY?
1780
01:18:33,346 --> 01:18:35,513
WE WILL MAKE A NEW PLAN,
OKAY?
1781
01:18:35,515 --> 01:18:36,547
- FINE.
- GOT IT.
1782
01:18:36,549 --> 01:18:38,449
- I HAVE AN IDEA.
- LET'S GO.
1783
01:18:38,451 --> 01:18:41,086
IT'S GONNA INVOLVE TWO CATS,
A PARACHUTE, AND A PLANE.
1784
01:18:43,488 --> 01:18:45,188
[LANCE] GOD, MELODY HASN'T
TEXTED ME BACK SINCE...
1785
01:18:45,190 --> 01:18:47,457
[WESLEY]
NO ONE CARES. JUST STOP.
1786
01:18:47,459 --> 01:18:48,491
HEY, RACHEL.
1787
01:18:48,493 --> 01:18:50,327
SO WE STILL DOWN FOR TONIGHT?
1788
01:18:50,329 --> 01:18:51,661
IF YOU WANNA SEE ME,
WESLEY,
1789
01:18:51,663 --> 01:18:53,295
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE
TO ASK ME OUT
1790
01:18:53,297 --> 01:18:55,331
ONE WEEK IN ADVANCE
AND TAKE ME OUT TO DINNER
1791
01:18:55,333 --> 01:18:57,132
SO WE CAN TALK AND GET TO
KNOW EACH OTHER BETTER.
1792
01:18:57,134 --> 01:18:59,234
- WHAT?!
- LAUREN, WE STILL ON FOR TONIGHT?
1793
01:18:59,236 --> 01:19:02,136
- FOR WHAT?
- FOR WHAT? YOU KNOW FOR WHAT. COME ON NOW.
1794
01:19:02,138 --> 01:19:04,906
THE FRIENDS-WITH-BENEFITS PROGRAM
HAS OFFICIALLY BEEN DISCONTINUED.
1795
01:19:04,908 --> 01:19:07,375
TRY FLATTERY.
THAT'S ON WOMEN SINCE EVE.
1796
01:19:07,377 --> 01:19:10,010
YOU LOOK SO NICE, RACHEL.
1797
01:19:10,012 --> 01:19:12,179
WHAT DID I TELL YOU, LAUREN.
BOTOX HELPS.
1798
01:19:12,181 --> 01:19:14,247
NOW I SEE YOU FINALLY LOST
THOSE FIVE POUNDS
1799
01:19:14,249 --> 01:19:15,382
YOU WERE SO WORRIED ABOUT,
MELODY.
1800
01:19:15,384 --> 01:19:17,918
WHAT?
IT'S A COMPLEMENT.
1801
01:19:17,920 --> 01:19:19,486
NO, IT WASN'T.
MINE WAS.
1802
01:19:19,488 --> 01:19:21,488
WE JUST... WE NEED TO FORGET
ABOUT WOMEN FOR A WHILE
1803
01:19:21,490 --> 01:19:25,257
BECAUSE MY GRADE IN CS
DEPENDS HIGHLY ON THIS APP.
1804
01:19:25,259 --> 01:19:28,327
OKAY, JUST TELL THEM THAT
YOU'RE WORKING ON AN UPDATE.
1805
01:19:28,329 --> 01:19:29,662
"JUNGLE" 2.0.
1806
01:19:29,664 --> 01:19:33,231
OKAY.
1807
01:19:33,233 --> 01:19:35,567
NICE, JAMES.
GOOD.
1808
01:19:35,569 --> 01:19:39,504
HEY, LANCE, WHAT'S GOING ON
WITH "JUNGLE"?
1809
01:19:39,506 --> 01:19:44,108
UM, UH...
1810
01:19:44,110 --> 01:19:46,110
WE'RE WORKING
ON AN UPDATE RIGHT NOW,
1811
01:19:46,112 --> 01:19:47,978
AND THE NEW AND IMPROVED
VERSION OF "JUNGLE"
1812
01:19:47,980 --> 01:19:49,413
WILL BE RELEASED
AS SOON AS IT'S DONE.
1813
01:19:49,415 --> 01:19:51,515
WHY DON'T YOU JUST
SHARE WITH THE CLASS
1814
01:19:51,517 --> 01:19:53,484
THE WORKFLOW PROCESS
IT TAKES
1815
01:19:53,486 --> 01:19:55,485
TO DEBUG AND DEVELOP
AN UPDATE?
1816
01:19:55,487 --> 01:19:56,620
THE ONLY THING IS THAT...
1817
01:19:56,622 --> 01:19:58,388
SPEAK UP, LANCE.
1818
01:19:58,390 --> 01:20:02,057
THE REST OF THE CLASS
WANTS TO TAKE DETAILED NOTES.
1819
01:20:02,059 --> 01:20:06,629
WELL, THAT WOULD BE IN VIOLATION
OF THE NDA THAT WE AGREED.
1820
01:20:06,631 --> 01:20:08,263
I EXPECT BY THE END OF TODAY
1821
01:20:08,265 --> 01:20:10,065
TO HAVE A FULL-PAGE OUTLINE
1822
01:20:10,067 --> 01:20:11,600
OF YOUR WORKFLOW PROCESS.
ALL RIGHT?
1823
01:20:11,602 --> 01:20:14,569
WAIT, AND SORRY.
I FORGET.
1824
01:20:14,571 --> 01:20:17,271
DID YOU TELL ME THAT NASA
COMMISSIONED "JUNGLE"?
1825
01:20:17,273 --> 01:20:19,206
MM-HMM, YEAH,
THAT'S RIGHT.
1826
01:20:19,208 --> 01:20:21,108
YOUR NEXT ASSIGNMENT
WILL PROBABLY BE WHAT,
1827
01:20:21,110 --> 01:20:23,945
STUDYING THE MATING RITUALS
ON MARS?
1828
01:20:25,748 --> 01:20:29,017
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S ALL FOR TODAY, CLASS.
HAVE A GOOD ONE.
1829
01:20:41,562 --> 01:20:43,162
THERE THEY ARE.
1830
01:20:43,164 --> 01:20:45,397
I THINK WE SHOULD
CALL A PRESS CONFERENCE.
1831
01:20:45,399 --> 01:20:48,099
- WHAT?
- YEAH.
1832
01:20:48,101 --> 01:20:51,102
TELL THE WORLD
WHO REALLY CREATED "JUNGLE."
1833
01:20:51,104 --> 01:20:53,504
SMART. SMART.
1834
01:20:53,506 --> 01:20:55,005
HEY. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH,
POPS,
1835
01:20:55,007 --> 01:20:58,508
WHAT'S THE NUMBER
TO YOUR PUBLICIST?
1836
01:20:58,510 --> 01:21:00,446
I GOT SOME ROCKIN' NEWS
I WANNA TELL THEM.
1837
01:21:02,381 --> 01:21:05,515
YEAH, OKAY, PRE-MED'S FINE.
THANKS FOR ASKING.
1838
01:21:05,517 --> 01:21:08,986
ALL RIGHT. I LOVE YOU. JUST
TEXT ME THE NUMBER. YEAH. BYE.
1839
01:21:11,722 --> 01:21:14,089
HE HAS TO TAKE ME
TO MY FAVORITE RESTAURANT.
1840
01:21:14,091 --> 01:21:16,258
AND NOT ASK ME FOR MY CREDIT
CARD SO I CAN PAY FOR IT.
1841
01:21:16,260 --> 01:21:19,327
AND NOT ASK THE WAITRESS
FOR HER NUMBER IN FRONT OF ME.
1842
01:21:19,329 --> 01:21:21,031
SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA
CALL THE APP, JAMES?
1843
01:21:23,467 --> 01:21:25,133
WHAT DO YOU GIRLS THINK
OF "EVE"?
1844
01:21:25,135 --> 01:21:27,970
EVE.
THE FIRST WOMAN.
1845
01:21:29,606 --> 01:21:35,476
HANNAH, WHAT DOES A GUY HAVE
TO DO TO EARN YOUR TRUST?
1846
01:21:35,478 --> 01:21:39,278
A GUY SHOULD BE HONEST.
1847
01:21:39,280 --> 01:21:42,215
IF HE'S A LIAR,
THAT'S A DEAL BREAKER.
1848
01:21:42,217 --> 01:21:43,716
HE SHOULD TELL ME THE TRUTH
1849
01:21:43,718 --> 01:21:46,452
REGARDLESS OF WHETHER IT
WILL HURT MY FEELINGS OR NOT.
1850
01:21:46,454 --> 01:21:48,821
ISN'T THAT A LITTLE UNREALISTIC,
THOUGH, HANNAH?
1851
01:21:48,823 --> 01:21:51,724
OKAY, CLEARLY WE UNDERESTIMATED
JAMES HERE, LIKE, BIG TIME.
1852
01:21:51,726 --> 01:21:53,792
NO, IT'S CLEAR
THAT JAMES IS A DICK
1853
01:21:53,794 --> 01:21:55,529
AND A BACKSTABBER.
1854
01:21:59,833 --> 01:22:02,500
WHAT DO YOU THINK
MAKES HIM TICK?
1855
01:22:02,502 --> 01:22:06,570
- UM, THAT NERDY CHICK, FOUR-EYES...
- HANNAH.
1856
01:22:06,572 --> 01:22:07,671
YEAH, YEAH, HANNAH.
1857
01:22:07,673 --> 01:22:09,172
WHAT DO WE KNOW ABOUT HER?
1858
01:22:09,174 --> 01:22:10,841
WELL, HER FULL NAME'S
HANNAH MARTIN,
1859
01:22:10,843 --> 01:22:14,143
AND SHE KEEPS A LOW PROFILE.
1860
01:22:14,145 --> 01:22:16,112
NO, SHE KEEPS A "NO" PROFILE.
1861
01:22:16,114 --> 01:22:17,814
SHE'S NOT ON ANY
OF THE DATING APPS.
1862
01:22:17,816 --> 01:22:19,248
NO, THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
1863
01:22:19,250 --> 01:22:21,216
NO, NO, NO,
IT'S NOT IMPOSSIBLE.
1864
01:22:21,218 --> 01:22:22,551
IT'S VERY POSSIBLE.
1865
01:22:22,553 --> 01:22:24,255
SHE'S OFF THE GRID.
1866
01:22:29,192 --> 01:22:31,392
[PHONE CHIRPING]
1867
01:22:31,394 --> 01:22:32,861
OKAY, LADIES,
1868
01:22:32,863 --> 01:22:34,629
EVERYONE TURN OFF
THEIR CELL PHONES,
1869
01:22:34,631 --> 01:22:36,497
THEIR TABLETS,
AND THEIR LAPTOPS.
1870
01:22:36,499 --> 01:22:39,233
WE'RE GONNA TRY
OUR VERY BEST TO CONCENTRATE...
1871
01:22:39,235 --> 01:22:42,369
- [PHONE DINGS]
- ...ON JAMES
1872
01:22:42,371 --> 01:22:44,604
BECAUSE HE HAS SOMETHING'S
VERY IMPORTANT TO TELL US.
1873
01:22:44,606 --> 01:22:46,139
HE'S BEEN STUDYING US
1874
01:22:46,141 --> 01:22:47,807
AND LISTENING
TO WHAT WE WANT FROM MEN,
1875
01:22:47,809 --> 01:22:50,243
AND HE'S
ABOUT TO REVEAL TO US
1876
01:22:50,245 --> 01:22:52,512
TO ULTIMATE APP.
1877
01:22:52,514 --> 01:22:53,813
WHERE'S HANNAH?
1878
01:22:53,815 --> 01:22:55,347
SHE SAID SHE'S GONNA BE LATE,
1879
01:22:55,349 --> 01:22:57,316
SO WE CAN GO AHEAD
AND START WITHOUT HER.
1880
01:22:57,318 --> 01:22:59,385
OKAY.
1881
01:22:59,387 --> 01:23:04,723
LADIES, IT'S BEEN A REAL EYE-OPENER
LIVING WITH YOU ALL THESE DAYS.
1882
01:23:04,725 --> 01:23:07,859
AND I THINK IF FINALLY DISCOVERED
THE ULTIMATE DATING APP,
1883
01:23:07,861 --> 01:23:09,794
AND I'D LIKE TO PRESENT IT
TO YOU RIGHT NOW.
1884
01:23:09,796 --> 01:23:13,297
NEWS FLASH,
THE HOOKUP APPS ARE BACK UP.
1885
01:23:13,299 --> 01:23:16,834
- GET OFF OF ME.
- YOU'RE NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO HAVE YOUR PHONE ON.
1886
01:23:16,836 --> 01:23:18,335
WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
1887
01:23:18,337 --> 01:23:19,670
WE'RE GONNA LISTEN TO JAMES
1888
01:23:19,672 --> 01:23:21,607
AND DECIDE
WHICH APP IS BETTER.
1889
01:23:25,844 --> 01:23:29,345
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
1890
01:23:29,347 --> 01:23:31,581
YOU ARE THE APP.
1891
01:23:31,583 --> 01:23:36,217
LOOK, I KNOW ALGORITHMS.
I KNOW BIOLOGY.
1892
01:23:36,219 --> 01:23:38,853
BUT THERE'S NOTHING
THAT I CAN CODE, INVENT,
1893
01:23:38,855 --> 01:23:41,656
OR CREATE
1894
01:23:41,658 --> 01:23:45,259
THAT EQUALS WHAT GOD HAS
ALREADY CREATED INSIDE OF YOU.
1895
01:23:45,261 --> 01:23:47,896
JAMES, THE GUYS DECIDE
WHICH APPS RULE.
1896
01:23:47,898 --> 01:23:50,864
NO, SEE,
THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE WRONG.
1897
01:23:50,866 --> 01:23:52,566
YOU DECIDE.
1898
01:23:52,568 --> 01:23:54,367
IF NONE OF THE GIRLS
ARE ON THE APPS,
1899
01:23:54,369 --> 01:23:56,937
WHERE ARE THE GUYS GONNA GO?
1900
01:23:56,939 --> 01:23:58,939
GIRLS, YOU HAVE THE POWER.
1901
01:23:58,941 --> 01:24:01,541
DON'T GIVE THAT UP.
1902
01:24:01,543 --> 01:24:04,309
IT'S LIKE FIFTH-WAVE FEMINISM.
1903
01:24:04,311 --> 01:24:06,511
I LIKE IT.
1904
01:24:06,513 --> 01:24:08,881
[JUSTIN]
TIFFANY MOVED OUT.
1905
01:24:08,883 --> 01:24:11,483
I ASKED HER TO MOVE OUT.
1906
01:24:11,485 --> 01:24:13,785
MAN, SEEING YOU
ON THAT DATE,
1907
01:24:13,787 --> 01:24:16,454
IT JUST...
IT JUST DID SOMETHING TO ME.
1908
01:24:16,456 --> 01:24:17,689
OKAY, YOU SPIED ON ME?
1909
01:24:17,691 --> 01:24:19,657
I WAS WORRIED ABOUT YOU.
1910
01:24:19,659 --> 01:24:22,960
YEAH, LISTEN.
CAN'T WE START FRESH?
1911
01:24:22,962 --> 01:24:25,563
[MAN ON RADIO] NOW FOR SOME
NEWS FROM OUR TECH BUREAU....
1912
01:24:25,565 --> 01:24:27,598
TAKE YOU
ON A SECOND HONEYMOON.
1913
01:24:27,600 --> 01:24:31,735
I PROMISE YOU I WILL MAKE IT UP
TO YOU THE REST OF MY LIFE.
1914
01:24:31,737 --> 01:24:34,971
- YEAH, YOU WILL.
- ...COLLEGE FRESHMAN NAMED JAMES SINGER.
1915
01:24:34,973 --> 01:24:37,473
THE REPORT ALSO STATES
THAT JAMES SINGER...
1916
01:24:37,475 --> 01:24:39,909
WHAT IS THAT?
IS THAT YOUR RADIO?
1917
01:24:39,911 --> 01:24:44,446
WHAT, "JUNGLE"?
WHAT THE...
1918
01:24:44,448 --> 01:24:47,950
[MAN ON RADIO] ...I WANT YOU TO KNOW
THAT YOU REALLY HURT MY SOCIAL LIFE TOO.
1919
01:24:47,952 --> 01:24:50,284
I KNEW HE WAS MY BOY.
WHO NEEDS A PATERNITY TEST?
1920
01:24:50,286 --> 01:24:52,587
IN BASKETBALL, THE COURTS
WERE BUSY LAST NIGHT...
1921
01:24:52,589 --> 01:24:54,455
DID YOU SEE THAT?
1922
01:24:54,457 --> 01:24:56,658
WAIT A MINUTE.
I'M CONFUSED.
1923
01:24:56,660 --> 01:24:58,492
DID JAMES MAKE THE APP?
1924
01:24:58,494 --> 01:25:00,895
OR DID HE TAKE DOWN
THE APPS?
1925
01:25:00,897 --> 01:25:03,830
BOTH.
HE'S A GENIUS.
1926
01:25:03,832 --> 01:25:08,436
THEY SAY THAT GENIUS MANIFESTS
ITSELF EVERY OTHER GENERATION.
1927
01:25:10,438 --> 01:25:11,771
WHAT?
1928
01:25:11,773 --> 01:25:14,473
YOUR BROTHER
INVENTED "JUNGLE"?
1929
01:25:14,475 --> 01:25:16,575
HE'S WAY COOL.
1930
01:25:16,577 --> 01:25:17,643
I KNOW.
1931
01:25:17,645 --> 01:25:21,947
JAMES SINGER.
1932
01:25:21,949 --> 01:25:23,817
I KNEW IT.
1933
01:25:25,619 --> 01:25:27,819
IS HE THE CRAZY KID
WHO KEPT CALLING ME?
1934
01:25:27,821 --> 01:25:29,621
[WOMAN]
WAY TO GO, JAMES.
1935
01:25:29,623 --> 01:25:31,923
THINK WE NEED TO MAKE
A DETOUR TO SEE THIS GUY.
1936
01:25:31,925 --> 01:25:33,791
HEY, HANNAH,
YOU GOT A SECOND?
1937
01:25:33,793 --> 01:25:35,726
NO, ROB,
I'M LATE TO A MEETING.
1938
01:25:35,728 --> 01:25:38,662
- WE NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT.
- WHAT?
1939
01:25:38,664 --> 01:25:41,665
- IT'S ABOUT YOUR BOYFRIEND.
- I DON'T HAVE A BOYFRIEND.
1940
01:25:41,667 --> 01:25:44,600
DID YOU EVER SET UP
AN ACCOUNT ON "JUNGLE"?
1941
01:25:44,602 --> 01:25:45,968
- NO.
- WHY NOT?
1942
01:25:45,970 --> 01:25:47,470
BECAUSE IT'S DISGUSTING.
1943
01:25:47,472 --> 01:25:48,905
OH, I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU.
1944
01:25:48,907 --> 01:25:51,273
A REAL PERV
MUST'VE DREAMT THAT UP.
1945
01:25:51,275 --> 01:25:53,275
YEAH, LANCE DREAMT IT UP.
1946
01:25:53,277 --> 01:25:55,644
WHOA, OKAY, YOU ACTUALLY
THINK THAT I HAVE THE SKILLS
1947
01:25:55,646 --> 01:25:57,479
TO CREATE AN APP
LIKE JUNGLE?
1948
01:25:57,481 --> 01:25:58,914
I DON'T THINK
YOU HAVE THE SKILLS
1949
01:25:58,916 --> 01:26:00,649
TO OPEN A BAG
OF POTATO CHIPS
1950
01:26:00,651 --> 01:26:02,450
WITHOUT FRICK AND FRACK HERE
ASSISTING YOU.
1951
01:26:02,452 --> 01:26:03,785
HONEY.
1952
01:26:03,787 --> 01:26:05,020
IT'S HANNAH.
1953
01:26:05,022 --> 01:26:08,558
HANNAH, JAMES DEVELOPED
"JUNGLE."
1954
01:26:10,860 --> 01:26:11,992
NO, HE DIDN'T.
1955
01:26:11,994 --> 01:26:14,594
EXCEPT THAT HE DID.
1956
01:26:14,596 --> 01:26:15,628
- SO...
- WHATEVER.
1957
01:26:15,630 --> 01:26:17,866
- COME ON.
- PEACE.
1958
01:26:28,609 --> 01:26:31,844
[WOMAN] COME ON, HANNAH.
JAMES IS EXPLAINING THE APP.
1959
01:26:31,846 --> 01:26:33,645
HANNAH, WHAT'S WRONG?
1960
01:26:33,647 --> 01:26:36,048
JAMES, ARE YOU THE CREATOR
OF "JUNGLE"?
1961
01:26:36,050 --> 01:26:39,584
- NO.
- I'M SO RELIEVED.
1962
01:26:39,586 --> 01:26:41,085
I'M THE CODER OF "JUNGLE."
1963
01:26:41,087 --> 01:26:43,054
- WHAT?
- THERE'S A BIG DIFFERENCE.
1964
01:26:43,056 --> 01:26:45,489
- ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
- YOU'VE BEEN STAYING AT OUR PLACE!
1965
01:26:45,491 --> 01:26:48,925
YOU HELPED LANCE
MAKE "JUNGLE"?
1966
01:26:48,927 --> 01:26:50,927
HANNAH, IT'S NOT
LIKE THAT.
1967
01:26:50,929 --> 01:26:53,930
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WHO CARES,
GUYS? HE'S HELPING US NOW.
1968
01:26:53,932 --> 01:26:55,766
- THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS.
- [WOMAN] I AGREE.
1969
01:26:55,768 --> 01:26:57,433
I'M GONNA HELP YOU
BUILD AN APP
1970
01:26:57,435 --> 01:27:00,536
BASED ON EVERYTHING YOU GUYS
TOLD ME YOU WANTED.
1971
01:27:00,538 --> 01:27:02,772
JAMES, I JUST STARTED
TO TRUST YOU AGAIN.
1972
01:27:02,774 --> 01:27:06,441
- AND THEN YOU LIE TO ME?
- I DID IT BECAUSE I WANTED TO BE WITH SOMEONE.
1973
01:27:06,443 --> 01:27:09,410
YEAH, I CALL FOUL.
THIS IS NOT COOL, JAMES.
1974
01:27:09,412 --> 01:27:11,813
SOMEONE CONVINCED ME THAT
IF ALL THE GUYS WERE ON THE APP,
1975
01:27:11,815 --> 01:27:14,481
THEN ALL THE GIRLS
WOULD HAVE TO BE, TOO, BUT...
1976
01:27:14,483 --> 01:27:16,383
[WOMAN]
BUT WHAT?
1977
01:27:16,385 --> 01:27:20,454
THE GIRL I REALLY, REALLY LIKE
DIDN'T GO ON IT.
1978
01:27:20,456 --> 01:27:23,023
IS THAT WHY YOU
SHUT IT DOWN?
1979
01:27:23,025 --> 01:27:24,423
YOU'RE THE ONE
WHO SHUT IT DOWN, RIGHT?
1980
01:27:24,425 --> 01:27:25,659
YES, I TOOK IT DOWN,
1981
01:27:25,661 --> 01:27:28,628
BUT I TOOK IT DOWN
1982
01:27:28,630 --> 01:27:30,496
'CAUSE I DIDN'T WANT
MY MOTHER USING IT.
1983
01:27:30,498 --> 01:27:32,732
YOUR MOM?
1984
01:27:32,734 --> 01:27:35,433
WHAT?
1985
01:27:35,435 --> 01:27:37,736
TURNS OUT...
1986
01:27:37,738 --> 01:27:40,872
CONNECTING ISN'T JUST HARD
FOR US.
1987
01:27:40,874 --> 01:27:42,407
IT'S HARD FOR EVERYONE.
1988
01:27:42,409 --> 01:27:45,577
SO YOU MADE "JUNGLE"
FOR LOVE.
1989
01:27:45,579 --> 01:27:50,349
I MADE "JUNGLE" BECAUSE SOMEONE
PROMISED MY WAY TO M.I.T.
1990
01:27:53,052 --> 01:27:56,486
AND, YES...
1991
01:27:56,488 --> 01:27:57,589
BECAUSE I LOVE HANNAH.
1992
01:28:00,525 --> 01:28:01,991
IF YOU DON'T KISS HIM
RIGHT NOW,
1993
01:28:01,993 --> 01:28:04,928
- I'M GONNA ASK HIM TO MARRY ME.
- I'LL BEAT YOU TO IT.
1994
01:28:04,930 --> 01:28:06,461
COME ON, HANNAH.
HE JUST SAID HE LOVES YOU
1995
01:28:06,463 --> 01:28:07,697
IN FRONT OF ALL THESE GIRLS.
1996
01:28:07,699 --> 01:28:10,068
I'M NOT GONNA
SING IT TO YOU.
1997
01:28:13,737 --> 01:28:15,739
JAMES, I...
1998
01:28:38,426 --> 01:28:41,094
- OH, GOOD NIGHT, TEACH.
- GOOD NIGHT, GUYS.
1999
01:28:41,096 --> 01:28:43,762
OH, HEY, LANCE.
I FORGOT.
2000
01:28:43,764 --> 01:28:45,764
I NEED TO SEE YOU
AT 4:00 TOMORROW
2001
01:28:45,766 --> 01:28:46,999
TO GO OVER NEXT TERM.
2002
01:28:47,001 --> 01:28:49,101
WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"NEXT TERM"?
2003
01:28:49,103 --> 01:28:50,735
YEAH, YOU'RE REPEATING
MY CLASS.
2004
01:28:50,737 --> 01:28:52,037
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
2005
01:28:52,039 --> 01:28:53,771
LOOKS LIKE YOUR
PLAN BACKFIRED, BRO.
2006
01:28:53,773 --> 01:28:55,440
AS MUCH AS
I WAS LOOKING FORWARD
2007
01:28:55,442 --> 01:28:57,175
TO SEEING HER EVERY SINGLE DAY
NEXT SEMESTER,
2008
01:28:57,177 --> 01:29:00,510
I THINK I MIGHT ACTUALLY
CHANGE MY MAJOR TO BUSINESS.
2009
01:29:00,512 --> 01:29:01,712
REALLY?
2010
01:29:01,714 --> 01:29:03,181
YEAH, "JUNGLE"
WENT REALLY WELL.
2011
01:29:03,183 --> 01:29:04,715
IT ALSO DIED.
2012
01:29:04,717 --> 01:29:07,017
YEAH, WELL, WE KILLED IT
FOR A SECOND THERE.
2013
01:29:07,019 --> 01:29:09,953
I MEANT TO TALK TO YOU
ABOUT SOMETHING.
2014
01:29:09,955 --> 01:29:11,889
YEAH, MAN, WHAT'S UP?
2015
01:29:11,891 --> 01:29:16,692
WOULD YOU MIND TAKING STEPS
BACK FROM RACHEL FOR ME?
2016
01:29:16,694 --> 01:29:18,494
I THINK I REALLY
LIKE HER.
2017
01:29:18,496 --> 01:29:21,931
- LIES. BLATANT LIES.
- LOOK AT THOSE EYES, MAN.
2018
01:29:21,933 --> 01:29:23,899
SEE, THIS GUY'S
IN LOVE, MAN.
2019
01:29:23,901 --> 01:29:26,568
- HE'S HEAD OVER HEALS.
- SERIOUSLY.
2020
01:29:26,570 --> 01:29:28,703
WOULD YOU...
WOULD YOU MIND?
2021
01:29:28,705 --> 01:29:31,572
FOR YOU?
HELL YEAH. TOTALLY.
2022
01:29:31,574 --> 01:29:33,108
- THANKS, BROTHER.
- [OVERLAPPING CHATTER]
2023
01:29:33,110 --> 01:29:34,975
PLOT TWIST,
HE DOES HAVE A SOUL.
2024
01:29:34,977 --> 01:29:36,510
OH, SHUT UP, YOU GUYS.
2025
01:29:36,512 --> 01:29:38,748
SEE YOU LATER.
2026
01:29:40,883 --> 01:29:43,083
JUST WALK IN THERE...
2027
01:29:43,085 --> 01:29:44,819
AND TALK TO HER.
2028
01:29:48,924 --> 01:29:51,523
UH, HEY, RACHEL.
2029
01:29:51,525 --> 01:29:53,927
YOU GOT A SECOND?
CAN I TALK TO YOU?
2030
01:29:53,929 --> 01:29:55,194
ASK YOU A QUESTION?
2031
01:29:55,196 --> 01:29:57,496
I'M LATE FOR CLASS.
2032
01:29:57,498 --> 01:30:01,199
OKAY, WELL,
HOW ABOUT I WALK YOU?
2033
01:30:01,201 --> 01:30:02,736
I GUESS SO.
2034
01:30:07,540 --> 01:30:09,540
HERE, LET ME
TAKE YOUR BOOKS.
2035
01:30:09,542 --> 01:30:12,710
I KNOW YOU'RE
NOT USED TO THEM.
2036
01:30:12,712 --> 01:30:14,711
SO, WHAT'S YOUR QUESTION?
2037
01:30:14,713 --> 01:30:19,816
UM, I WAS WONDERING
IF MAYBE
2038
01:30:19,818 --> 01:30:23,219
YOU'D WANNA GO TO DINNER
WITH ME ON FRIDAY?
2039
01:30:23,221 --> 01:30:25,155
[RACHEL CHUCKLES]
2040
01:30:25,157 --> 01:30:27,123
IS THAT A YES?
A NO?
2041
01:30:27,125 --> 01:30:29,992
MAYBE? POSSIBLY?
KINDA? NOT REALLY?
2042
01:30:29,994 --> 01:30:31,627
- IT'S A MAYBE.
- OKAY.
2043
01:30:31,629 --> 01:30:34,897
OKAY, I CAN TAKE A MAYBE.
I'LL TAKE A MAYBE.
2044
01:30:34,899 --> 01:30:36,198
WHY DON'T WE, UH...
2045
01:30:36,200 --> 01:30:39,033
WE CAN GET MARRIED
ON THE ROOF RIGHT THERE.
2046
01:30:39,035 --> 01:30:40,768
[BOTH LAUGHING]
2047
01:30:40,770 --> 01:30:44,305
TOO FAST... OR YOU AFRAID
OF HEIGHT... TOO FAST? OKAY.
2048
01:30:44,307 --> 01:30:46,040
OKAY, WE'LL TAKE IT BACK...
2049
01:30:46,042 --> 01:30:50,577
♪ I DON'T WANNA SAY
THAT I'M BREAKING AGAIN ♪
2050
01:30:50,579 --> 01:30:52,546
[VOCALIZING]
2051
01:30:52,548 --> 01:30:57,752
♪ I WISH I COULD CHANGE THAT
'CAUSE I CAN'T FORGET ♪
2052
01:30:59,154 --> 01:31:01,654
♪ GIRL, I'M FEELIN' WASTED
2053
01:31:01,656 --> 01:31:03,958
♪ BUT I'M NOT DRUNK YET
2054
01:31:06,094 --> 01:31:08,294
♪ AND, GIRL,
YOU MAKE ME NERVOUS ♪
2055
01:31:08,296 --> 01:31:11,763
♪ JUST HOLDING MY BREATH
2056
01:31:11,765 --> 01:31:14,299
[VOCALIZING]
2057
01:31:14,301 --> 01:31:17,035
♪ MOST NIGHTS I'M LYING AWAKE
2058
01:31:17,037 --> 01:31:18,902
♪ I'M SCARED TO FIND OUT
2059
01:31:18,904 --> 01:31:21,306
♪ THAT YOU FOUND ANOTHER MAN
2060
01:31:21,308 --> 01:31:24,775
♪ I'LL FIGHT FOR YOU
TILL THE VERY END ♪
2061
01:31:24,777 --> 01:31:27,945
♪ MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT
ANY LONGER ♪
2062
01:31:27,947 --> 01:31:31,047
♪ MY HANDS AND MY TWO FEET
2063
01:31:31,049 --> 01:31:33,249
♪ ARE SLOWLY CREEPING BACK
2064
01:31:33,251 --> 01:31:34,784
♪ MY LOVE
2065
01:31:34,786 --> 01:31:37,753
♪ MY HANDS AND MY TWO FEET
2066
01:31:37,755 --> 01:31:40,323
♪ ARE SLOWLY CREEPING BACK
2067
01:31:40,325 --> 01:31:43,792
♪ YOU KNOW IT'S HARD
TO SEE MY FUTURE ♪
2068
01:31:43,794 --> 01:31:47,162
♪ WHEN YOU'RE ALL I WANNA SEE
2069
01:31:47,164 --> 01:31:48,897
♪ SO, BABY
2070
01:31:48,899 --> 01:31:51,632
♪ MY HANDS AND MY TWO FEET
2071
01:31:51,634 --> 01:31:53,901
♪ ARE SLOWLY CREEPING BACK
2072
01:31:53,903 --> 01:31:56,704
♪ MY LOVE
2073
01:31:56,706 --> 01:31:59,708
♪ 'CAUSE IT'S NOT OVER
2074
01:32:00,742 --> 01:32:02,110
[VOCALIZING]
2075
01:32:05,113 --> 01:32:08,183
[VOCALIZING]
2076
01:32:11,186 --> 01:32:13,085
♪ EVERY NIGHT I PRAY
2077
01:32:13,087 --> 01:32:16,123
♪ THAT I'LL SEE YOU AGAIN
2078
01:32:18,092 --> 01:32:23,330
♪ AND I WISH I COULD TAKE BACK
THE THINGS THAT I SAID ♪
2079
01:32:24,931 --> 01:32:27,131
♪ AND, GIRL,
I'M FEELING WASTED ♪
2080
01:32:27,133 --> 01:32:32,236
♪ BUT I'M NOT DRUNK YET
2081
01:32:32,238 --> 01:32:34,004
♪ JUST LET ME LOVE YOU
2082
01:32:34,006 --> 01:32:37,741
♪ AND LOVE YOU UP
UNTIL THE END ♪
2083
01:32:37,743 --> 01:32:40,043
[VOCALIZING]
2084
01:32:40,045 --> 01:32:42,412
♪ MOST NIGHTS
I'M LYING AWAKE ♪
2085
01:32:42,414 --> 01:32:44,281
♪ I'M SCARED TO FIND OUT
2086
01:32:44,283 --> 01:32:46,916
♪ THAT YOU FOUND ANOTHER MAN
2087
01:32:46,918 --> 01:32:50,186
♪ I'LL FIGHT FOR YOU
TILL THE VERY END ♪
2088
01:32:50,188 --> 01:32:53,355
♪ MY HEART BREAKS OUT
INTO THE OPEN ♪
2089
01:32:53,357 --> 01:32:56,425
♪ MY HANDS AND MY TWO FEET
2090
01:32:56,427 --> 01:32:58,860
♪ ARE SLOWLY CREEPING BACK
2091
01:32:58,862 --> 01:33:03,764
♪ OH, SLOWLY
2092
01:33:03,766 --> 01:33:06,334
♪ SLOWLY CREEPING BACK
2093
01:33:06,336 --> 01:33:10,737
♪ SLOWLY
2094
01:33:10,739 --> 01:33:13,739
♪ SLOWLY CREEPING BACK
2095
01:33:13,741 --> 01:33:15,309
♪ LET ME LOVE YOU
2096
01:33:15,311 --> 01:33:18,746
♪ LOVE YOU UP UNTIL THE END.
2097
01:33:18,748 --> 01:33:23,748
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