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1
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:06,240
I saw you on the swing. Were you
watching me? Not in a creepy way.
2
00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:08,760
It's my first day at work
and I'm already nervous.
3
00:00:08,760 --> 00:00:12,160
Welcome back, Miri Matteson.
I don't remember you.
4
00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:13,480
Because we only just met.
5
00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:16,120
Oh, my God! Can you just get it into
your big, stupid, married head
6
00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:18,040
that this is not going to happen?
Goodbye.
7
00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:20,160
A bit higher. Like this? Yeah.
8
00:00:20,160 --> 00:00:22,680
I can't believe I didn't realise.
What?
9
00:00:22,680 --> 00:00:24,520
Well, the caterpillar. Oh, God.
10
00:00:24,520 --> 00:00:27,440
You need me. No, I don't.
Yeah, you're lonely. No, I'm not.
11
00:00:27,440 --> 00:00:30,440
Apparently, it's where some girl
bludgeoned someone to death.
12
00:00:30,440 --> 00:00:31,680
It's not the version I heard.
13
00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:34,240
Apart from that, you're
just like a normal person really.
14
00:00:34,240 --> 00:00:35,440
I am a normal person.
15
00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:37,600
Shit the bed!
16
00:01:14,440 --> 00:01:17,520
Right. OK, I'll start.
Oh, Mandy's going to start.
17
00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:20,160
Miri, you're not taking it
seriously... I am taking it serious.
18
00:01:20,160 --> 00:01:22,880
You're taking it too seriously.
I'm just going to start.
19
00:01:22,880 --> 00:01:25,360
# Last night I was dreaming
20
00:01:25,360 --> 00:01:29,640
# I was locked in a prison cell
21
00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:32,680
# When I woke up, I was screaming
22
00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:36,040
# Calling out your name. #
23
00:01:44,880 --> 00:01:46,400
Let me guess. You spoke to Kathy.
24
00:01:46,400 --> 00:01:48,640
She said we could wait
and Elsie would be squeezed in.
25
00:01:48,640 --> 00:01:52,800
Well, Kathy mainlines CBD oil so,
if you want to wait, it's your life.
26
00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:54,800
Next!
27
00:01:56,360 --> 00:01:57,960
Hi. My name's Miri Matteson.
28
00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:00,320
I haven't been here for ages
but I need to re-register.
29
00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:03,360
Your last visit
was September 2000. Yeah.
30
00:02:03,360 --> 00:02:04,960
That's a long time ago.
31
00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:06,960
I'm, er...I'm very healthy.
32
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,960
Well, I need an updated ID
and proof of address.
33
00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:12,640
Er, I don't...I don't have anything
at the moment.
34
00:02:12,640 --> 00:02:14,480
Bank statement, home insurance?
35
00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:17,480
I'm not on any of the bills.
So you don't pay bills.
36
00:02:17,480 --> 00:02:19,240
Oh, no. It's my parent's house.
37
00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:20,880
I wish my parents paid for me.
38
00:02:20,880 --> 00:02:22,600
It's not like that. Mobile bill.
39
00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:24,520
I don't have a mobile.
40
00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:25,880
How can you not have a mobile?
41
00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:28,200
Look, I just need a doctor
to look at my head.
42
00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:31,080
Well, I just need a proof
of residence. I live there.
43
00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:33,360
Yes, I know, with Mummy
and Daddy, who pay the bills
44
00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:35,680
but I'm going to need a piece
of paper that tells me that.
45
00:02:35,680 --> 00:02:38,520
OK. So what if I've been away
for a long time?
46
00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:40,160
Where have you been? Somewhere.
47
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,360
Where? Does it matter? Look.
48
00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:46,320
I have an infected cut on my head
and I need to see a doctor.
49
00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:47,520
Go to A&E.
50
00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:49,320
No hospitals, I want to come here.
51
00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:51,960
Well, then you're going to have
to start being a big grown-up girl
52
00:02:51,960 --> 00:02:53,600
that pays some bills now,
aren't you?
53
00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:55,560
Next!
54
00:02:57,240 --> 00:03:00,520
I'm sorry. Also not sorry.
55
00:03:04,920 --> 00:03:06,920
Oh, my God.
56
00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:20,800
I got the ones round the back.
I could re-use the Blu-Tack.
57
00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:23,400
Oh, God. I'm so sorry.
This, and the smashed window.
58
00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:26,200
It's fine. I'm just waiting for
some new glass so...I can't open.
59
00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:27,400
The brick was meant for me.
60
00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:29,120
It wasn't meant to ruin your new
business.
61
00:03:29,120 --> 00:03:31,280
Mm...I don't know.
I'm sort of a murderer too.
62
00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:34,560
I'm the pie shop destroyer,
so we're both outsiders
63
00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:36,480
and it could have been meant
for both of us.
64
00:03:36,480 --> 00:03:37,600
Yeah, I really doubt that.
65
00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:39,240
Look, just go and have
a nice day off.
66
00:03:39,240 --> 00:03:42,040
When was the last time you did
something nice, unprisony?
67
00:03:42,040 --> 00:03:43,160
Go to the zoo or something.
68
00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:45,920
Yeah. I don't want to go to the zoo,
I want to work and I want to help.
69
00:03:45,920 --> 00:03:48,600
Yeah, and you will,
as soon as I've got a new window...
70
00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:50,560
..and some customers again.
71
00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:52,720
It's all good. Keep your chin up.
72
00:03:52,720 --> 00:03:54,560
We can't let the bastards win,
can we?
73
00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:57,040
No. No! No.
That's the spirit. High five.
74
00:03:57,040 --> 00:04:00,560
Oop. Oh, sorry. Try again.
You've got to concentrate.
75
00:04:00,560 --> 00:04:02,720
I'll tell you what.
Little tip, look at the elbow. OK.
76
00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:03,880
Always works.
77
00:04:06,160 --> 00:04:07,480
This could have cost me my job,
78
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:09,280
Janice, and my job
is all I have right now.
79
00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:11,840
Bullshit.
You're one of the lucky ones.
80
00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:13,960
One of the most privileged girls
I've dealt with.
81
00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:15,640
I'm getting shit sent to me, Janice.
82
00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:18,040
Actual shit...in a box,
83
00:04:18,040 --> 00:04:19,360
graffiti on the house,
84
00:04:19,360 --> 00:04:21,840
and now somebody's putting
these things all around town.
85
00:04:21,840 --> 00:04:24,960
I know this is frustrating
but take a step back.
86
00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:27,200
A bit of prank poopy. Real poopy.
87
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:29,680
Ooh. Someone's got
a new photocopier.
88
00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:32,120
It's not like the victim's father's
turned up at your work
89
00:04:32,120 --> 00:04:34,800
and stabbed you in front
of nine people with a sword,
90
00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,960
which hasn't ever happened actually.
Oh, Christ!
91
00:04:36,960 --> 00:04:40,400
Your life post-prison
is going really well.
92
00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:43,200
You need to realise that
and be grateful.
93
00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:47,160
I deal with broken women all day
long and YOU, you've got it all.
94
00:04:47,160 --> 00:04:50,480
You just need to lower your
expectations and get over yourself
95
00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:53,200
a bit...in a nice way.
96
00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:56,520
Oh.
97
00:04:58,960 --> 00:05:01,400
You look like a rabbit.
All right. Thanks.
98
00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:04,080
Lara Boback. Here's a tip.
99
00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:06,760
If you're going to kill someone,
don't kill a copper's daughter.
100
00:05:06,760 --> 00:05:10,560
Janice... I'm just saying.
Argh, God.
101
00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:16,600
I keep, um...
102
00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:21,400
..I keep listening to this tape that
we made the day before it happened.
103
00:05:21,400 --> 00:05:23,160
Oh, my God. What?
104
00:05:23,160 --> 00:05:26,080
You can't change what is done.
It's done.
105
00:05:26,080 --> 00:05:29,960
You can only change
what you haven't done...yet.
106
00:05:29,960 --> 00:05:32,480
Like right now.
107
00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:34,960
What? Yeah? What? Look, I'm tired.
108
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:37,520
You know what? Take that tape,
dash it in the bin. Boom.
109
00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:39,520
And then go and do something nice
with yourself.
110
00:05:39,520 --> 00:05:41,960
Go to the zoo or something.
I don't want to go to the zoo.
111
00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:43,920
Why is everyone trying
to make me go to the zoo?
112
00:05:43,920 --> 00:05:46,680
Fine. Try Pilates.
113
00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:48,280
No, actually, don't.
114
00:05:48,280 --> 00:05:51,480
I did that one time
for a whole year. Nothing changed.
115
00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:53,880
And then I found out
I hadn't been doing that thing
116
00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:56,320
where you try and squeeze
your bumhole shut
117
00:05:56,320 --> 00:05:59,480
and then you suck your poom-poom up
into it.
118
00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:03,480
Oh. Right, and if anyone asks...
119
00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:06,040
..we meet in my office. Yeah?
120
00:06:06,040 --> 00:06:08,240
Yeah, but, like, we could
meet in your office.
121
00:06:08,240 --> 00:06:10,440
No, I like coming to your house.
122
00:06:10,440 --> 00:06:13,000
Your biscuit game is strong.
123
00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:16,440
Got any Jaffas?
124
00:06:19,080 --> 00:06:21,640
Oh, Jesus.
I thought you were your father.
125
00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:23,440
Is he very frightening?
126
00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,920
I didn't rinse the plates. Oh.
127
00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:29,480
Yeah, and you've got to rinse them.
Really rinse them. Saves energy.
128
00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:32,520
But surely if you really, really
rinse them, then you may as well
129
00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:35,360
have washed them, so isn't it,
like, more wasteful in the end?
130
00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:37,800
Oh, God. Don't tell him.
He'll implode.
131
00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:41,600
Mum, do you want to do something
today, like, you and me?
132
00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:45,360
What? I don't know, like something,
anything, together.
133
00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:47,360
Why don't you see Mandy?
She'd love to see you.
134
00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:50,200
I don't want to see Mandy.
Well, your father will be home soon.
135
00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:51,960
No, I just...
136
00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:53,920
..um, I want to spend
some time together.
137
00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:57,880
I've got too much to do, and Janice
ate all the biscuits, so...
138
00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:03,840
Billy! Oh, God. Get your coat,
you're taking me on an adventure.
139
00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:05,320
What now? Cunt. Yeah.
140
00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:07,480
Cunt, cunt, cunt.
141
00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:10,160
That's really distracting.
Um, yes, right now. Piggy cunt.
142
00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:11,600
Who's a little piggy cunt?!
143
00:07:11,600 --> 00:07:14,720
It's actually very sweet cos
she thinks that you're her aunt.
144
00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:17,360
Yeah. She's not...she's not saying
aunt but anyway it's...
145
00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:19,360
Well, I'll get my keys.
146
00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:22,840
See you out the front in a minute.
Yeah. OK. Cool.
147
00:07:22,840 --> 00:07:27,080
Over the fence with the cunt.
Ah! Next door, cunt.
148
00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:31,080
How old?
149
00:07:31,080 --> 00:07:32,720
Oh, she's five.
150
00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:35,320
Constantly sick. It's a nightmare.
151
00:07:35,320 --> 00:07:38,080
I remember.
Mm. Try not to breathe her in.
152
00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:41,200
It goes so fast.
153
00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:45,680
Everybody says that.
Because it's true, I'm afraid.
154
00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:48,200
Do you have grandkids?
155
00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:51,440
Yes...yes, I do.
156
00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:55,600
How many? My daughter has
a boy and two girls.
157
00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:58,480
Blissful chaos.
158
00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:00,960
It must be lovely being
a grandparent, you get all the fun
159
00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:03,480
and half the work.
160
00:08:03,480 --> 00:08:05,440
It's wonderful.
161
00:08:05,440 --> 00:08:07,560
Oscar Matteson.
162
00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:09,960
Oh, er...
163
00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:14,600
Can't believe I haven't been here
before. This is the best fun ever.
164
00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:17,560
I love boats. Wow!
165
00:08:17,560 --> 00:08:20,840
I used to want to be a sailor
but I get so sick, both ends.
166
00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:22,920
It is a nightmare. I was gutted.
167
00:08:22,920 --> 00:08:24,880
I tried so many times.
168
00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:28,360
No, it's just life, isn't it?
Yeah. Yep.
169
00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:30,320
What did you want to be
when you were a kid?
170
00:08:30,320 --> 00:08:33,960
Er, a vet, Jamie Oliver's wife,
the Appleton sisters - desperately
171
00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:35,480
but that didn't work out.
172
00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,760
Oh, yes, I can see it.
Oh, thank you. You're welcome.
173
00:08:38,760 --> 00:08:41,880
I wanted to be a sailor,
now I'm a gardener.
174
00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:44,000
I thought were a carer. What?
175
00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:46,360
For that really angry woman. Anna?
176
00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:50,840
Yeah. No, no. I'm a carer too,
most of the time, yeah,
177
00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:55,640
but I'm a gardener as well,
so it's both, varied.
178
00:08:58,320 --> 00:09:00,040
Do you, er...?
179
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:03,000
Do you have a person, like a...
180
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:05,640
..a man friend, or a woman,
someone that you're, um...?
181
00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:07,400
No, I mean, I did once
but he's married now.
182
00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:09,520
He's got kids and stuff so... Oh.
183
00:09:12,360 --> 00:09:13,880
Do you, er...
184
00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:15,280
..do you still think about him?
185
00:09:15,280 --> 00:09:18,320
Er, I mean no...but, yes.
186
00:09:18,320 --> 00:09:21,560
Do you know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, I do.
187
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:23,640
How about you?
188
00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:26,960
Oh, I... Well, I loved somebody once
but they...
189
00:09:26,960 --> 00:09:31,000
..they changed,
so the love changed, too, which...
190
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:34,480
Well, it happens, I guess,
doesn't it? Yeah. No, I get that.
191
00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:36,520
BELL RINGS
192
00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:38,800
Hey. Here's your chance. Yeah.
193
00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:42,360
Boats! Thank you. Cheers. Right.
194
00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:48,640
Let's raise our hands.
Let's do this as it starts.
195
00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:52,960
Yay! Oh. Yay! It's not doing...
196
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:57,520
Recon day two.
Suspect boarding sail boat.
197
00:09:57,520 --> 00:09:59,120
She's making a new friend.
198
00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:01,360
I hope it goes better
than last time.
199
00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:04,480
Wahay! She seems to enjoy herself.
200
00:10:04,480 --> 00:10:08,440
Side to side, everyone. Yes.
201
00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:12,000
Chla-what? Chlamydia.
Could be worse.
202
00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:14,520
Like a urine infection?
203
00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:16,080
Not quite.
204
00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:17,640
Oh, but it hurts when I pee.
205
00:10:17,640 --> 00:10:19,240
Yes, but it's an STD.
206
00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,720
What, like syphilis?
It's just chlamydia.
207
00:10:21,720 --> 00:10:24,200
Symptoms can take
a while to present,
208
00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:25,920
some people self clear,
others don't.
209
00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:29,040
But you'll need to contact your
sexual partners and inform them.
210
00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:30,360
Partners?
211
00:10:30,360 --> 00:10:33,280
I'm assuming you are with someone
or more than one.
212
00:10:33,280 --> 00:10:35,680
Good God, just one,
213
00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:38,080
and we haven't, um...
214
00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:41,840
..for a while. We...
215
00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:43,760
Sure.
216
00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:49,680
She probably planned it
for months.
217
00:10:49,680 --> 00:10:52,040
Now she's just working
in the fish and chip shop.
218
00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:55,400
Did you hear? She threw a brick
at a group of people yesterday.
219
00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:57,120
Yeah. Proper psycho.
220
00:10:57,120 --> 00:10:59,520
And to think
she's just walking around...
221
00:10:59,520 --> 00:11:01,960
..not even tagged, free as a bird.
222
00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:03,240
Terrifying.
223
00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:06,960
So now I've got this
and my verrucas to worry about.
224
00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:09,880
God. They must get loads
of verrucas in prison.
225
00:11:09,880 --> 00:11:12,240
She's probably riddled with them.
226
00:11:14,160 --> 00:11:17,840
I used to come here
when I was a kid.
227
00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:19,560
I thought you weren't
from round here.
228
00:11:19,560 --> 00:11:22,120
Oh, no. I mean, like places like
this, like fairs and stuff. Oh.
229
00:11:23,960 --> 00:11:25,760
Bet you were a nice kid.
230
00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:28,560
Thank you. Yeah. You too. Oh.
231
00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:32,960
Hey! Shall we go on this?
232
00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:36,240
Oh, no. Er, sorry.
233
00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:38,720
I'm terrified of giraffes, so...
But they're not...
234
00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:41,520
They're not real giraffes.
They're very, very realistic.
235
00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:43,320
They're not.
Their necks are really short.
236
00:11:43,320 --> 00:11:46,040
OK. It's a...
237
00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:48,400
..it's so fast as well, isn't it?
It's just kind of whoosh.
238
00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:50,000
It's not. It's ridiculously slow.
239
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,120
Have a bash. I'll be there.
240
00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:53,480
You'll be there. Yeah.
241
00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:58,040
Urgh.
242
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:01,240
Urgh.
243
00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:03,120
Urgh.
244
00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:29,120
BELL RINGS
245
00:12:35,680 --> 00:12:38,160
RINGING TONE
246
00:12:38,160 --> 00:12:40,240
Sorry. Fucking nightmare.
247
00:12:40,240 --> 00:12:43,280
The twins have been trying
to put a hat on the dog.
248
00:12:43,280 --> 00:12:46,880
It's like a fucking war zone
in there. Are you free?
249
00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:50,640
No, Dom. Listen. It's over.
It's not happening again.
250
00:12:50,640 --> 00:12:53,720
What? Oh, yeah. Sure. OK. No probs.
251
00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:56,240
I don't want to be this person
any more. I'm her mother.
252
00:12:56,240 --> 00:12:57,640
Yeah. Fair enough.
253
00:12:57,640 --> 00:13:00,480
But you'll just change your mind
like you did the last time
254
00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:03,640
and the last, last time.
No, I will not. Goodbye, Dom.
255
00:13:03,640 --> 00:13:05,440
Oh, come on.
Let's just have a little...
256
00:13:05,440 --> 00:13:08,320
..like a little goodbye fiddle,
yeah? No.
257
00:13:13,440 --> 00:13:15,320
Oh, my God. These are amazing!
258
00:13:15,320 --> 00:13:18,000
Could I get...? I'm so sorry.
No, no, it's all right. It's just...
259
00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:21,320
I'm completely hogging them.
..I haven't had any. Oh, sorry.
260
00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:24,600
I've never met anyone
like you before. Oh.
261
00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:26,760
I've never met anyone
like you before, Billy,
262
00:13:26,760 --> 00:13:28,600
you're a one-off. Well...
263
00:13:32,080 --> 00:13:35,200
I don't want to break
this moment but...
264
00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:37,280
I really need to pee.
Oh, God. So I'm...
265
00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:39,240
Just go. Do it. Yeah, right.
I'm going to go.
266
00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:40,960
No. I'm just
going to grab some of these.
267
00:13:40,960 --> 00:13:43,120
Oh, that's very hygienic. Yeah.
268
00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:53,040
Hello again.
269
00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:54,880
We met on the beach the other day.
270
00:13:54,880 --> 00:14:00,000
Oh. Oh, yeah. Yes. Sorry. Hi.
Samuel. Miri. Hi. Hiya.
271
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:03,520
Um...Wednesday afternoon,
amusement park.
272
00:14:03,520 --> 00:14:05,080
Sorry. Who are you?
273
00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:07,960
I'm an investigator,
and I look for the truth
274
00:14:07,960 --> 00:14:11,880
and I'm here to help YOU
to tell YOUR truth
275
00:14:11,880 --> 00:14:14,360
but, first, we need to solve
your little problem.
276
00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:16,320
Er, I am...
I am with a friend right now.
277
00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:18,520
I am not going to do this.
I'm not doing this.
278
00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:22,280
Why was Lara so angry with you
the night she died? What?
279
00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:25,760
Yes. She was angry at you,
so full of rage. Why?
280
00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:28,400
I'm sorry, can you...? I don't want
to talk to you. Can you just...
281
00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:30,560
Can you go? Can you just
leave me alone, please?
282
00:14:30,560 --> 00:14:33,040
You have a bite mark. No! No.
It's on your shoulder, isn't it?
283
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:35,640
Oy, oy, oy!
Get out of it, you little shit.
284
00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:38,800
Go on. If you want to see tits,
piss off to Margate.
285
00:14:40,040 --> 00:14:42,240
I'll be in touch.
286
00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:43,320
Huh!
287
00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:45,920
Thank you.
288
00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:47,600
Yeah, well, let's just, er...
289
00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:50,520
..let's get out of here. I've got
to pick up some meds for Anna.
290
00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:52,360
Let's go via the supermarket, yeah?
291
00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:53,600
Good. Come on. OK.
292
00:15:00,520 --> 00:15:02,360
I'll just be two minutes. All right?
293
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:06,200
Oh, OK. OK.
No, I'm fine. Yeah, yeah. Sure.
294
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,680
Oh. Miri, hi.
295
00:15:18,680 --> 00:15:20,440
Oh, my God. Are you so desperate
and lonely
296
00:15:20,440 --> 00:15:22,560
that you've got to stalk me
in a supermarket now?
297
00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:25,040
I'm buying dinner for my family.
298
00:15:25,040 --> 00:15:27,080
Wow, that's, um...very nutritious.
299
00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:29,440
Yeah. Well, don't feel sorry for me
because you're the one
300
00:15:29,440 --> 00:15:33,040
that's all alone with, um,
a really shit haircut.
301
00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:35,560
Actually I'm on a date
with a shit haircut, so...
302
00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:37,120
Who with?
303
00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:39,760
With my neighbour, Billy, yeah.
304
00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:43,880
In fact, we just stopped here to buy
us...some condoms.
305
00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:46,760
Some condoms
for all of the sexual...
306
00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:48,600
..intercourse
that we will be having.
307
00:15:48,600 --> 00:15:51,640
Is he some kind of
a true crime perv?
308
00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:53,160
Sure.
309
00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:55,800
Oh, Miri.
310
00:15:56,840 --> 00:15:59,280
He doesn't know who you are,
does he?
311
00:15:59,280 --> 00:16:01,440
Do you know what?
Just goodbye, Mandy.
312
00:16:01,440 --> 00:16:03,880
Wait, wait. Wait!
313
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:10,760
I was at a wedding last year and
this posh woman farted really loudly
314
00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:15,200
and I got the most uncontrollable
giggles and I looked at Mark
315
00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:19,160
and there was nothing,
not even a twinkle,
316
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:23,080
and I started to cry because I knew,
I knew if you'd have been there,
317
00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:25,080
then we would have
pissed ourselves.
318
00:16:27,640 --> 00:16:28,840
And I missed you.
319
00:16:30,680 --> 00:16:35,000
So, yes. Yeah. You are right.
I am desperate and I am lonely.
320
00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:38,320
Me too. Me too.
321
00:16:39,680 --> 00:16:42,600
And I didn't visit you in prison
because I felt terrible.
322
00:16:42,600 --> 00:16:44,600
If I'd have got to the cliff
ten minutes earlier,
323
00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:46,760
then maybe none of this
would have happened.
324
00:16:48,840 --> 00:16:50,000
Tell the truth.
325
00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:54,720
You don't want to be with someone
who doesn't know who you are.
326
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,000
Think about it. Hmm?
327
00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:07,320
It's, er, it's two for one
for pocket calculators.
328
00:17:07,320 --> 00:17:10,520
Oh. Oh. Oh, no. Gosh.
329
00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:12,600
No, no. This isn't what you, um...
330
00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:15,320
I just...I don't mind.
It's just...I don't.
331
00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:18,680
I can't do that much. No, no.
It's my parents... Oh.
332
00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:23,440
My parents. They asked me
to get them some condoms.
333
00:17:23,440 --> 00:17:25,240
Your parents? They have... They...
334
00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:27,320
Yeah. They're so old
but that's a lot for them.
335
00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:29,400
No, well, they do it.
They just like to do it, yeah.
336
00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:32,680
Wow. I never... I never hear them.
They're really quiet.
337
00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:37,560
And they're fast and, er,
it's all over very quickly
338
00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:40,120
but it's regular and,
do you know what?
339
00:17:40,120 --> 00:17:43,160
They can have a night off because
they're old and they need a break.
340
00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:55,360
Oh, I... Oh, God.
341
00:17:55,360 --> 00:17:58,920
Here we are. I didn't need a piss
at the, er...at the funfair.
342
00:17:58,920 --> 00:18:04,040
Ah! I thought that was suspiciously
quick. Thank you.
343
00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:05,360
You're welcome.
344
00:18:08,920 --> 00:18:12,160
Er, right. Well, I should head home
345
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:15,680
because Anna needs her meds and...
Yeah. Yeah. Course.
346
00:18:15,680 --> 00:18:20,800
I've had the best day, like a
holiday from stuff, so thanks.
347
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:25,400
Oh. Er, well, we're back home now.
348
00:18:25,400 --> 00:18:26,920
Yeah.
349
00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:32,320
OK. Yeah. Goodbye. Yeah.
350
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:34,680
Bye. See you. Let's just... Sorry.
351
00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:37,360
Oh, I did... No. Just...
352
00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:42,480
Lovely, lovely day! Yeah.
353
00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:45,360
Yeah, really nice. Bye-bye. OK.
354
00:18:54,360 --> 00:18:56,600
Jesus Christ.
355
00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:02,840
She told he
she'd never do it again. What?
356
00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:06,240
And I believed her.
I just believed her.
357
00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:08,040
Oh. Is this about
the dishwasher again?
358
00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:10,800
What's wrong with the dishwasher?
Um, no. Nothing, nothing,
359
00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:14,400
cos everyone always really, really
rinses everything, so it's fine.
360
00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:16,480
It always comes out in the end.
361
00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:17,960
What does?
362
00:19:17,960 --> 00:19:20,200
The truth.
363
00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:26,160
Damn and blast it.
364
00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:29,480
Urgh!
365
00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:39,200
What's your name?
366
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,840
Billy. Do you do mojitos, Billy?
367
00:19:41,840 --> 00:19:44,320
Yeah. There you go.
368
00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:50,320
Mm! God, that's good.
369
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:54,600
Oh, how much do I owe you?
No, no, no, it's on the house.
370
00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:56,840
And I got these off a guy.
371
00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,680
Oh.
372
00:19:59,680 --> 00:20:02,040
What are they?
They're the good stuff.
373
00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:07,200
Mm.
374
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:14,960
Will I be myself again, Billy?
375
00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:18,160
Yeah.
DOORBELL RINGS
376
00:20:19,160 --> 00:20:22,320
It's my husband! Hide! Hide!
He has a fucking blunderbuss!
377
00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:25,720
Oh, gosh, well,
I'll have to fight him off.
378
00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:31,760
Oh, hi.
Billy, I need to tell you something.
379
00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:33,600
Yeah. We can't...
380
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:36,600
We can't be friends
unless you know the truth about me.
381
00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:39,520
Me too. I need to, erm... I need
to tell you something too. Oh, OK.
382
00:20:39,520 --> 00:20:42,080
Yeah, and maybe it's...
Maybe it's the same thing.
383
00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:44,800
Well, I doubt that. Let's just say
it like a scissors, paper, stone.
384
00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:47,360
Oh, no. Christ, really? Let's just
say it on the count of three.
385
00:20:47,360 --> 00:20:49,480
No, no, mine is really big.
It's really, really...
386
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:51,440
I'll say mine and then...and
then you say yours.
387
00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:53,760
But I'm telling you right now
that mine is so much bigger
388
00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:55,480
than yours unless, well, unless
you...
389
00:20:55,480 --> 00:20:58,040
We'll just do it after three.
One, two, three.
390
00:20:58,040 --> 00:21:00,960
I'm not Anna's carer. I killed that
girl at the sound mirror.
391
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:02,440
It was me. I'm married to her.
392
00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:08,120
Oh, my... What? You're...
You're married to...to her?
393
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:11,200
Gosh! Oh.
394
00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:15,040
But we had a little awkward hug
and you bought me this...
395
00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:17,080
HE SIGHS
396
00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:18,960
I'm quite shocked, actually.
397
00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:20,720
Help. What? You're...
398
00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:23,360
So you're a psycho killer.
399
00:21:23,360 --> 00:21:25,240
Billy. Oh, God! Somebody help me.
400
00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:27,600
Look, I'm not going to hurt you.
I'm not going to hurt you.
401
00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:30,360
Oh, Jesus. Oh, God.
Can you just calm down?
402
00:21:30,360 --> 00:21:32,560
It's not like they said at all.
403
00:21:32,560 --> 00:21:35,000
Oh, well, you...
You didn't kill her?
404
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:37,240
No, erm... No, I...I did.
405
00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:39,240
Stay away from me! Go on, fuck off!
406
00:21:39,240 --> 00:21:41,200
Billy! Calm, Billy!
This is excessive.
407
00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,520
God, you killed someone!
You're married!
408
00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:46,880
Oh, fuck. Aw, bub-bab-bub-a!
409
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:50,000
Oh, I'm having a panic attack.
Just...breathe...
410
00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:52,280
Count to ten in your head,
count to ten in your head.
411
00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:55,360
A-one, one-two, one-two-three.
412
00:21:55,360 --> 00:21:57,320
Wa-haaa!
HE GROANS
413
00:21:57,320 --> 00:22:00,000
Oh, God. I'm going to...
Na-na-na-haa.
414
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:02,280
I'm sorry.
415
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:04,880
But you would have found out and
I wouldn't have been able to
416
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:09,440
tell you the truth myself, and that
would have been so much worse.
417
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:11,080
It's just...
418
00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:13,320
It's not what you think.
419
00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:17,240
She was...she was crazy angry
with me and she bit me
420
00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:20,120
and I didn't...I didn't know why...
421
00:22:20,120 --> 00:22:23,680
And, erm... Though I just like...
422
00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:26,160
I just pushed her back...
423
00:22:28,960 --> 00:22:30,640
..and it was an accident.
424
00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:34,880
But the person who you were
with today...
425
00:22:35,880 --> 00:22:38,760
..that...that was me.
That is who I am.
426
00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:40,600
That is me.
427
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:42,960
Thank you.
428
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:45,800
Thank you for telling me.
That was...that was really brave.
429
00:22:45,800 --> 00:22:48,000
Can I help...? No, it's just...
KNOCK ON WINDOW
430
00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:50,360
Ah, for... Leave my husband alone.
431
00:22:50,360 --> 00:22:52,160
Oh, great. You murderess.
432
00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:54,560
Oh, you're a murderess,
you'll stop at nothing.
433
00:22:54,560 --> 00:22:57,320
They should never have let you out.
You better go. OK.
434
00:22:57,320 --> 00:23:01,160
Don't tell me you thought he wasn't
married, I heard you.
435
00:23:03,680 --> 00:23:05,560
DOOR CLOSES
436
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:06,880
Hello.
437
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:11,920
Oh, blast. I forgot the butter.
438
00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:14,040
What did the doctor say?
439
00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:15,680
An infection.
440
00:23:15,680 --> 00:23:18,040
Oh, did they give you antibiotics?
441
00:23:18,040 --> 00:23:20,280
HE SIGHS
442
00:23:21,920 --> 00:23:23,960
What's wrong, darling?
443
00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:30,520
A shipping container
full of rubber ducks
444
00:23:30,520 --> 00:23:33,240
has sunk off the coast
of the Isle of Wight.
445
00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:35,000
Oh, dear.
446
00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:37,520
More plastic in the ocean,
contaminating everything,
447
00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:39,440
fucking everything up, and for what?
448
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:42,240
What good did a rubber duck ever do?
449
00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:45,480
Miri used to love them in the bath.
It's all for nothing.
450
00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:48,560
I...I hate the waste.
451
00:23:48,560 --> 00:23:50,600
Are you OK?
452
00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:53,120
Fine. I'll go and get the butter.
453
00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:01,680
SWITCH CLICKS
Right, OK, I'll start.
454
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:03,200
Oh, Mandy's going to start.
455
00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:05,960
Miri, you're not taking it
seriously. I am taking it serious.
456
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:08,560
You're taking it too seriously,
I'm just going to start.
457
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:09,880
SWITCH CLICKS
458
00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:20,280
SWITCH CLICKS
Right, OK, now just Lara. OK, fine.
459
00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:27,360
# Some day, I believe it
you will come to my rescue...
460
00:24:27,360 --> 00:24:30,320
# Unchain my heart
you're keeping
461
00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:34,560
# And let me start anew, ooh
462
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:40,520
# Hours pass so slowly since
they've thrown away the key
463
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:42,160
# Away the key
464
00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:44,800
# Can't you see that I'm lonely?
465
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:47,400
# Won't you help me, please... #
466
00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:51,320
Lara! Wait! Shh, my dad's back!
Hide the cigarettes!
467
00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:55,600
Hi, Dad! Hi, Mr Boback!
468
00:25:25,760 --> 00:25:28,760
Remember me? I was in prison.
469
00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:31,200
It's a letter from my probation
officer, with my address.
470
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:32,840
I want an appointment, now.
471
00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:35,800
We've actually got an appointment
available in about an hour.
472
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:37,760
Great, I'll wait.
473
00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:40,320
She was here yesterday
so sort her out too.
474
00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:42,880
I'll...I'll make sure she's seen.
Yeah, you will.
39040
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