All language subtitles for Schooled s01e10 Theres No Fighting In Fight Club.eng

LAINEY: Back in the '80s,
I was a cheerleader, and it was a blast.

But in the '90s,
it went to a whole new level.

The cheerleaders were finally
seen as athletes,

and TV competitions
captured our attention.

Okay, girls. Know who's jazzed
to be your new coach?

Here's a clue...
Whoo!

Sorry, it's me.

I'm just excited.
(CHUCKLES)

Used to be a cheerleader
back in the day.

I was actually team captain,
became real popular.

Dated the Quaker mascot,
became less popular.

Was it a mistake?
Yeah, perhaps.

Do I still love the guy?
Who knows.

His name was Barry.

It was a long time ago.
He's a doctor now.

We're getting off topic.

Point is,
we're gonna kill it.

Can I get a "Go Quakers!"?

Go Quakers!

I didn't hear you.

(LOUDER)
Go Quakers!

Damn right!
Now, let's get to work!

(THUD)
What's going on right now?

We gotta decorate the football
players' lockers today.

And then we gotta
bake them all game-day desserts.

Oh, man. I forgot about
this part of cheerleading.

Girls,
cheerleading has changed.

It's not just about
rooting on the players.

You're all just as much
of athletes as they are.

We are?
Of course.

You've seen cheerleading
competitions on ESPN, right?

ESPN?

That's
my dad's channel.

Everyone, follow me.

See, these girls
are fierce competitors.

And you can be
just as badass.

You really think so?

Yes! But it means
more time practicing

and less time
baking and crafting.

So you really think
the football team will go for this?

I'll talk to Coach Mellor.
Coach to coach.

What do you say, girls?

We are so in.

Go Quakers!

Go Quakers!

* One of these days,
you're gonna get outta here

* Live your life
and finally be free

* Go where you wanna go,
do what you wanna do

* Someday, you will say
"Those were the days" *

LAINEY: It was April 3rd,
1990-something,

and the school was on fire
with gossip.

Back before social media,
it spread the old-fashioned way...

Notes and word of mouth.

And no gossip was hotter
than news of an after-school fight.

Oh, this excites me.

I heard Raday
was talking smack about Reza in the pit,

and he went berserk
and called him out.

I heard
Raday and Reza's families

are sworn mortal enemies
that date back centuries.

Whoa, wait.
Who's fighting who now?

Not Raday and Reza.

Saved it.

Code Red, people.

Word of a fight
has spread like wildfire.

Reza versus Raday, 2:30 sharp,
behind the gymnatorium.

We got to
stop 'em now.

Come on! Let's go.
Whoa, wait.

Stop 'em? Why?

'Cause we're teachers
and that's our job?

Our job is to teach
these kids

how to settle
their differences by themselves.

Just look
the other way.

I'm sorry. Are you saying
we should allow these kids

to just smack
each other around

like Sgt. Slaughter
and Captain Lou Albano?

What? I like WWF.

I find the story lines
very compelling.

Yes. That is how young men
squash their beef.

No, we need to help them
squash the beef

by talking it out
like normal, rational adults.

Talk? Come on.

Have you ever had
beef to squash, CB?

Not really.
Trust me.

You let 'em
throw a few punches,

or their beef
is gonna get beefier

until it
can't be contained.

Okay, there is no way

that I'm letting
the entire student body

stand outside
chanting "fight"

as two nice kids
throw haymakers at each other.

STUDENTS:
(CHANTING IN DISTANCE) Fight!

Well, it seems we've
been debating this issue so long

that it's now 2:30.

Damn it, Crosby!
You were stalling on purpose.

Little bit.

(CHANTING CONTINUES)

They're doing that thing
where they're super charged and in each other's faces.

And now they're
doing that thing where they jerk their arms

like they're
about to throw a punch,

causing the other one
to flinch like a little punk.

And now Raday's doing
that hockey move!

I'm going in!
Hey, everyone, simmer down, okay?

I'm breaking this up.
Pardon me.

I am also breaking this up
because I am appalled

at this pathetic display
of boxing skill.

Okay, ignore everything that
your shop teacher just said and get back to class.

LAINEY: The next day,
Mr. Glascott discovered that,

as the new principal,
he'd lost touch

with what was happening
on the ground.

Code Red, people.

Just got word there's gonna be
a bare-knuckle throwdown,

2:30 sharp
behind the gymnatorium.

That was yesterday,
and we broke it up.

What?
Don't sweat it, John.

You're head
of the school now.

You have more important things
to worry about.

What exactly could be
more important than the actual children?

Well, you know,
all the important stuff

like budgeting, and, um,
allocating the money,

and scheduling the funds
and where they go.

Those are all
the same thing.

CB, set up a meeting
with me and those boys.

No need, boss.
Already dealing with it.

Without me?
But I'm head of school.

Which is why I assumed
that you would want nothing to do with this.

Well,
you assumed wrong.

So, what exactly
is your plan?

Fight Club.

Oh, yeah,
now we're talking!

Fight club?
Are you nuts, man?

Okay, calm down.
The first rule of this Fight Club

is that there's no fighting
in Fight Club.

Instead, we read
the book Fight Club

and then talk about it.

So it's
a book club. No.

Sounds like a book club.
Fine, it's a book club.

But it'll give the boys
an opportunity to have real dialogue.

I hate
this fight club.

Wow, that's actually
a fantastic idea, CB. Thanks.

And just the thing I need
to get back on the ground

where I belong,
helping these students again.

Wait, what?

John, I was hoping
to run point on this.

I mean, it took me a while
to make the flyer.

At first
I tried bubble letters, then, um, puffy paint...

Well, an issue this important
needs to be handled correctly,

and, as a former GC,

guidance counselor,

I have
more experience. Right.

But that's
not your job anymore,

which is why I think
the kids would prefer me.

You made the right call
on the no bubble letters.

You can feel good
about that.

Can I at least
come to the meeting?

Of course you can!

That way you can see
how it's done. O-Okay.

I look forward to seeing
how the idea I just told you is done.

LAINEY: Principal Glascott
was insecure about being replaced,

but I was confident
Coach would help me

take cheerleading
to the next level.

Hey, Rick. Got a sec?

For you, "Coach Lewis"?
Of course!

Come in, come in!

Gah, there you are.

Wow, you're excited
to see me.

Well, of course I am!
Because you've just begun your coaching journey.

Ah,
how I envy you.

Soon you'll be glowing
with what we in the coaching world call that...

Coaching glow.

Oh, here you go.

Go on and take it.
Your first whistle.

Once that's
slung around your neck,

you'll
never be the same.

Anyway, I wanted to talk
about the cheerleaders.

Whatever you need,
it's done.

Coaches helping coaches.

That's what this
is all about.

Perfect, 'cause I've
entered the girls

into this big
cheerleading competition,

but there's no time
to practice

'cause they got to
decorate lockers and make food and stuff.

Ah! That reminds me.

Recipe
for seafood gumbo.

Nothing gets me
pumped for battle like good old fish stew.

Oh, right, I remember
the pre-game gumbo we had to make.

One of our school's
time-honored traditions.

William Penn himself
loved the gumbo,

a new taste
from far away.

God, it's
so many ingredients.

That's why it tastes
like victory, Coach.

Go Quakers!
Okay, you're not getting it.

My cheerleaders can't
make the gumbo that simmers for 16 hours

and win regionals.
Understand?

Looks like you've got
your first coaching obstacle.

But the great coaches,
they figure it out.

Are you a great coach,
Lainey Lewis?

Uh, you bet
your blue-shorted ass I am.

I'll give you my word
as a fellow coach you'll get your gumbo.

Fight, Quakers,
fight.

LAINEY: So, in order to get
more time to practice,

I went to some kids
I was pretty sure

would be willing to help
the cheerleaders.

Attention,
chess club.

The cheerleaders are
in dire need of help,

and you're
our only hope.

So,
what do you say?

No, no, no, no.

We're playing
a game of the mind, here.

Shut up,
Ellen!

Whatever it is,
we'll do it.

Yeah. Consider us your bishops
in shining armor.

Gah,
I mean knights!

I'm just so...
Flustered!

(CHESS PIECE CLATTERS)

But yes.
The answer's "yes."

LAINEY: I found my solution
to my problem,

and Glascott found
CB's solution to his.

Okay, boys,
welcome to Fight Club.

TOGETHER: Yeah!

We got a few rules
to discuss.

The first rule
of fight club is...

TOGETHER:
There is no fight club!

...there's no fighting
in fight club.

Wait, what?
Rule number two,

do not touch the boiler.

You will be burned,
and your parents will sue us.

So that's a no-no.
Seriously?

Rule number three,

if you find the biology lab's
lost corn snake,

do not approach it.

She's pregnant
and very irritable.

So, this isn't
a fight club at all.

CB said the point of us
coming down here

was to work out
our problems.

Forget about CB. Ol' Glascott
is leading the charge now.

And it'll feel
like fight club

when we start reading
Fight Club.

So it's a book club.

CB: John?
Hmm?

Can I talk to you?
Now?

All right,
I'll be right back.

Stop eyeballing that boiler,
Mankewitz.

You changed
the meeting time.

You said I could be
a part of this.

Yes, but then
I saw the movie,

and I realized
Ed Norton's whole problem

was that Brad Pitt
kept interfering,

so I decided to run
the club on my own.

First of all,
Brad Pitt wasn't interfering.

He's not even there.

Well, for someone
who wasn't there,

he sure did pop up a lot,
didn't he?

Yes, 'cause he's
in Ed Norton's head.

In his head?

Brad Pitt was hooking up
with Helena Bonham Carter

while Norton was eating cereal
in the kitchen.

No, Ed Norton
hooked up with her.

He just imagined
that she was with Pitt.

So who's eating cereal?

That part is unclear.

Cereal
doesn't eat itself, CB.

Okay, the movie
has some holes.

But we were supposed
to do this together...

STUDENTS:
(CHANTING IN DISTANCE) Fight!

Damn it, not again.

(CHANTING CONTINUES)

Okay, okay.

Enough!
(CHANTING STOPS)

There's no fighting
in fight club.

That's my
number one rule.

For the record, your rules
and fight club make no sense.

Oh, it's my club again.
I didn't make that flyer.

It's a good thing that
I was here to break this up.

Okay,
everybody out of here.

CB's misguided Fight Club
is over.

(SIGHS)

What's this?
The team's pre-game gumbo.

Why are you presenting me
with the team's pre-game gumbo, Ed Morris?

Cheerleaders
are busy preparing

for some
high-octane competition,

so Ms. Lewis asked
the chess team to help out. What?

They're gonna root us on
at our next blitz tournament.

Silently, of course.

But actual female girls
will be there.

Everyone wins!

Okay, we have
a huge problem here.

This school has glorious
traditions that must be honored.

Like the cheerleading
gumbo tradition.

You can't
just change that.

Didn't you get
Ed's gumbo?

Oh, I got Ed's gumbo.

It tasted
like six generations

of loving home cooking
down on the bayou.

But Ed is not
a cheerleader.

Hey, I took
your coaching advice.

I figured out a way to make
more time for practice

so we can get ready
for regionals. Come on.

We both know my boys
are not gonna be happy

with delicious gumbo
from the chess team.

I'm not coaching
to make your boys happy.

I'm coaching to make
my girls champions.

Don't do that.
Don't make this a boy-girl thing.

I think you made this
a boy-girl thing

when you turned your back
on Ed's delicious seafood-and-sausage stew!

Look, as much as
I appreciate your squad, they're not athletes!

They're cheerers.
It's right there in the name.

Not athletes, huh?

What they're doing
is on ESPN,

just like football
or basketball or any other sport.

No way is cheerleading
on ESPN...

Sweet sod!
Jenny Nussbaum just flipped like a land dolphin!

Because this takes
real skill and strength.

Sweet lord of Rah-Rah,
these ladies are fearless!

Oh, God,
don't drop...

Oh, what a save!
Did you see that?

That's called
a "basket toss,"

actually one
of our easiest moves.

Sounds like you get
why we want to focus on this instead of gumbo.

Oh, I get it.

Attention, cheerleaders!
No...

Cheer athletes!

From this moment on,
your glorious sport is Mellor approved!

Tradition as we know it
will never be the same!

(GASPS)

Oh! Oh.

Maybe talk about
how the world's changing after practice?

Yes, I'm sorry.

LAINEY: I had
convinced Coach Mellor

that my cheerleaders
were athletes.

Now he just had to convince
his players.

Look, I know
you're all disappointed

that the girls need to focus
on their own sport,

but times are changing.

Cheerleaders are now athletes
just like you guys!

Does this mean
Marni's not gonna decorate my locker anymore?

No.
So, then, it'll be Cheryl?

What? No. Nobody's decorating
anybody's locker.

Then how will get
glitter and ribbons on them?

You won't.

From now on, all lockers
will be plain, bare metal

with no arts and crafts
of any kind.

But those decorated lockers
are how everyone in school

knows we're
awesome football players.

It's cool, Weasel.
People will know when they see the cheerleaders

presenting us
with our game-day desserts.

Guys,
this is not complicated.

The cheerleaders
are no longer

decorating your stuff
or baking you sweets.

WEASEL: So, to be clear,

the only thing
the cheerleaders now do is cheer at our games?

Yes.

And if I may add,
there is a world where they upstage you guys

with their high-octane
acrobatic routines.

Okay, I'm gonna speak
for the team here and say "no."

Look, I know tradition
is important, and it will live on.

How?
You now have the unwavering support of the chess team,

who will provide
all game-day treats.

Who's up for some
homemade Louisiana lovin'?

Come on! Get 'em out of here!
No!

That's it.
No beignets for anyone.

You'll not taste
one bite

of their heavenly goodness.
Not one, okay?

Go into my office,
men.

You can watch me eat
these pastries on my own.

We made three dozen
of these.

Challenge accepted.

LAINEY:
A day had passed since the fight club book club

turned into
an actual fight club,

but the real battle
was now on.

Hey, John.

Um, I heard you're having
a sit-down with Alec and Reza.

Yeah, that's right.

General Glascott
has to return to the trenches to save his troops.

My point is,
I'm their class advisor.

That's why you're invited
to watch me work my magic.

By the time I'm done
with those boys,

they're gonna be
best bros.

Crazy.

You're like
a pencil break black belt.

Okay, enough.
What's going on here?

I mean,
it has no official name,

but we generally call it
pencil break.

But that's
a whimsical game of friendship.

I haven't fixed
you two yet.

Nah, we're good.

No, you're not good.

Alec has been busting
your balls all year, man.

Yeah, which is why I just
had to stand up for myself.

I got some mad
displaced anger

because my parents
are making me go

to Chestnut Hill Academy
next year.

Dude, that sucks.

Okay, enough.

No more bonding.

This burgeoning
friendship is over. What?

The moral of this story
cannot be that punching solves problems.

So, as the esteemed Head
of this School,

I hereby declare that
you two are not friends.

You can't do that.

It's an unprecedented move,
sure,

but (CHUCKLES)
my hands are tied.

Back me up here, CB.

Actually,
they do have a point.

Don't need input.

Just tell the children
they're dead to each other.

You know what? They're not
the ones who need fixing. It's you.

Nice.
Dude!

Reza Alavi is right.
Sometimes you just have to stand up for yourself.

Exactly.
Word.

And if I let myself
get walked all over,

then I deserve
everything you do to me.

You're a (BLEEP)
and I'm tired of it.

Boom.
This is the best day of the year.

Are you kidding me
right now?

You're all over me
lately.

You're picking on me.
You're taking my ideas.

You're making me feel
like I'm the problem here.

CB, honestly, I have no idea
what you're talking about.

And that's
what makes it worse. But you know what?

I'm done. No more.
I'm done with you.

By the way, Brad Pitt
is clearly Ed Norton's imaginary friend.

I watched it with
my 12-year-old nephew, and he got it.

He's a child.

LAINEY: While CB
was done with John,

my squad was ready
to cheer on the team

at the biggest game
of the year.

Coach Lewis, uh,

it seems we got a little
situation brewing here.

Oh, another coaching obstacle,
huh? Lay it on me.

Well,
it's come to my attention that the football players

no longer
want the cheerleaders on the team bus.

Or cheering at all.

What?

You said you'd get them
on board.

I know,
but it turns out

they really like
their lockers decorated.

Wait, are you saying they
don't want us to cheer at all?

That's right.
We own the halftime show now.

Oh, God.
We've been replaced by...

Flag corps.

Enjoy rolling up
to the game

in your mom's
weak Pontiac Aztec, Harriet!

(THUD)
Ugh, watch the pole.

Just keep it straight.
No, you, like, flip it.

Coach,
you have to stop this.

The flag girls
are so jazzed.

I can't take that
away from them.

Look who's on
the bus now, bitches! Great.

We'd be on that bus
if we'd just kept things the way they were.

But now,
we've got nothing.

We've got
a competition coming up.

That's what cheerleading's
all about, right?

Not flirting with
a bunch of football players on the back of a bus.

No! Thanks to you,
we don't even have a team to cheer for,

which means we're not even
cheerleaders at all.

(SIGHS) Girls...

Looks like we got ourselves
another coaching obstacle. We'll figure this out.

(CLEARS THROAT)

No.
You figure it out.

You may be a coach,
but I'm not. (SCOFFS)

Hey, C-to-the-B!

It's me,
John Glascott.

Can we have
a man-to-man talk?

Not like boss and boss-ee
but more like friends?

Of course.

Okay,
here's the thing.

John Glascott
is not a (BLEEP). Take it back.

I will not, 'cause that's
what you've been to me.

How? Tell me.

I demand to know
as your boss and also friend.

Well, if you're
gonna make me say it,

I think
you're jealous of me.

Right, I'm jealous of a man
wearing a Snoopy tie.

Actually, I like your tie.
It's fun. Thanks.

But what do I have
to be jealous about?

'Cause I'm the teacher
that you used to be,

and you
can't stand it, boss.

Don't you dare
call me boss

unless it's a pleasantry
between pals like,

"Hey, I hope you had
a nice summer vacation, boss,"

or "thanks for taking me
to that Dave Matthews concert, boss."

STUDENTS:
(CHANTING IN DISTANCE) Fight! Oh, damn it, not again.

I'll handle it.
Not if I can handle it first!

There is no fighting
at this school. (CHANTING STOPS)

Who is it?
Tell me right now.

The two of you,
apparently.

Us?

Why would anyone
think that?

Uh, because CB
called you a (BLEEP).

What?
No, we don't have beef.

I mean, we do,
a lot of it,

but fighting
is not the answer.

I just intercepted
a note in class.

Has the fight
started yet?

There is no fight!

What adults do
is talk and listen.

Violence solves nothing.

Besides, I'm 20 years younger.
It wouldn't even be fair.

Exactly.

Given CB's youth
and lack of experience,

things could get ugly
for him really quick,

and we don't want that.

Your principal is right.

And to see me put
my judo training to use

would make matters worse,
frankly.

No worse than
me showing you the art of capoeira...

(EXHALES SHARPLY)

...AKA
Brazilian dance fighting.

Sure, I could flip your
principal into a trophy case,

and glass
would rain down on him,

but what
would that prove?

Nothing!

And not because
I would see it coming,

I'd do a back flip
out of the way,

kicking him in the forehead
as I land!

Oh,
that's not possible. You don't know!

Oh, come on!
STUDENTS: (CHANTING) Fight!

No!
No!

We're not fighting.
It's not happening.

No fighting. Go!
It's not happening.

All right, you heard 'em.
Move it.

(EXHALES SHARPLY)

Squash the beef.

Okay, come on.
This is crazy.

I don't have it out
for you.

You're one
of my favorite teachers, and you know that.

I used to.

Not anymore.

LAINEY: The football team
had won their game,

but to Coach, it was
the worst loss of the season.

Today was a total loss.

Uh, but we just won.

But you still lost
because you turned your back on our cheer team.

Coach, why are you sitting
in the locker room?

Yeah, you only
just charge around

all fired up,
throwing stuff.

Not anymore, Weasel.

This is on the cheerleaders
for thinking they're athletes.

I'm sorry,
but they're not.

Well,
if that's what you think, then clean up.

I'll be waiting for you
in the gym.

It's simple.

If you can do
just one basket toss,

we'll all go back
to the way things were.

I don't know
what a basket toss is,

but if they can do it
wearing a skirt,

I think
we'll be just fine.

Ladies?

Like Coach Lewis taught you.

Let's see you do that!

I can squat 350,
holmes.

I don't think
it'll be a problem to throw Weasel

20 feet in the air.
Wait, what?

I got your note.
What's going on?

Just getting my boys
on board.

Rick,
I appreciate the effort,

but we both know
there is no way...

On three!

One, two,
(GROANING) three!

Aah!

(GASPING)

STUDENT: You're my boy,
Weasel.

I'm so sorry, man.
I'm so sorry.

So, yeah,
you're real athletes. Big time.

And we get it
if you never want to cheer for us again

after the way we've acted.

Depends. Do you still want
the flag corps to do the halftime show?

Those girls are mean.

And their giant sticks
are dangerous.

Then looks like you just got
your cheerleaders back.

Yes!

Whoo!

Welcome back, Coach.

Just do me a favor
and no more quitting. Deal.

And don't worry. We'll make
you proud at regionals.

And we'll be right there
cheering you on.

Really?

Consider it
a new tradition.

(ALANIS MORISSETTE'S
YOU LEARN PLAYS)

Hey, can we have
a man-to-man talk?

Not as co-workers,
but as friends?

Yeah, that didn't go over
so well last time.

It will now.

Because
you were right, CB.

I'm jealous.
Why?

It's so hard watching you
with those kids,

being the one
that they depend on.

That used to be me,
and back then, I was so happy.

And now you're not?

I'm the boss.
It doesn't matter what I feel.

Anyways, I gotta get
to a budgeting meeting.

We good?
We squashed the beef?

Consider it squashed.

Great.

Hey, you know, um,
just 'cause you're head of the school now

doesn't mean you can't still
be in the trenches.

Honestly, my school days
are so crazy,

I don't even know
if that's possible.

But what about helping me
after school with a new club?

A fight club.

* The dust settles

LAINEY: Sometimes
when we're confronted with life's changes,

we all try
to hold on to the past

and what
we're comfortable with,

even teachers.

They spend so much time
helping us

that we forget
that they grow and change, too.

Luckily,
they've got their coworkers and friends around them

to support them
and help them through anything.

* ...learn

* You grieve, you learn

* You choke, you learn *

Because even though
things change,

the tradition
of cheering each other on

will never go out of style.

Hello. My name is Brett Dier,
and I play CB.

And I'm sitting here
with the real Reza Alavi.

So, you and Alec Raday
really got in this fight.

REZA: Absolutely.

Did you win?
I did not.

How long
did this fight last?

REZA: You know,
it seemed like forever,

but it was probably
10 seconds.

Did he really
pull that hockey move

where he pulled your shirt
over your head?

Yeah, he did.

What did your parents say
about the fight?

Of course I didn't tell them
about the fight

so they'll learn
from this TV show,

but he did
step on my glasses,

so I had to come up
with some story why I needed new glasses.

Who was your favorite teacher
at William Penn?

There was a lot
of good teachers,

but I have a lot
of fond memories of CB. Yeah.

He was my swim coach.

He was able
to make something

like putting your
head underwater for 20 hours a week fun.

How long
can hold your breath?

All the way
down the pool. That's great.

(BOTH LAUGH)

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