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♪ ♪
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- Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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♪ ♪
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(BELL TOLLING)
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(HORSE NEIGHING)
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Lovely day for a walk, eh, Holmes?
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Yes, just look at our great
city, bustling with activity.
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Even the chimney sweeps
are hard at work.
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JEFFREY: It's all dirty in here.
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I don't care. Keep going.
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Shouldn't I wear
some sort of protective suit?
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Why? Don't you trust me?
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I do, but our friend Bartholomew
went in lots of chimneys
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in the '80s, and now he's sick.
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Holmes, there's something
I have to tell you.
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- I'm getting married...
- I deduce, Watson,
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- that you're getting married.
- I just said that.
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Yes, but I had deduced it first.
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That's what happened.
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So, congratulations.
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Thank you.
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I thought you might be upset
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because we won't be able
to solve mysteries...
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Solve mysteries together.
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Elementary.
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Crown Jewels stolen!
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"Another one bites the dust,"
says Queen.
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And coming up, Russia and Prussia
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still named basically the same thing.
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Ghastly. Who would have
the audacity to steal the crown
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00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:55,014
off the queen's head?
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Only one man, Watson.
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Professor Moriarty,
the Napoleon of Crime.
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I've had him on the run for a year now.
35
00:02:01,588 --> 00:02:03,289
His criminal empire is in shambles,
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but he won't go quietly.
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00:02:04,691 --> 00:02:07,794
I say, look, there's hotshot
20-year-old comedian
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Benjamin Hill.
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("YAKETY SAX" PLAYING)
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Oh. That'll be funnier
when he's older and slower.
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(HORN BLOWING)
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Watson, this is the boat to America.
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How do you know that?
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Because Neil Diamond is on board. Look.
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♪ September morn ♪
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♪ We danced until the night
became a brand-new day... ♪
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I really hoped
he'd be singing "America."
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00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:38,758
Well, how will we know who Moriarty is?
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We've never seen him before.
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The science of deduction.
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Hold it right there, Professor Moriarty.
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00:02:45,132 --> 00:02:46,466
Sherlock Holmes?
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00:02:46,467 --> 00:02:47,967
How did you know it was me?
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00:02:47,968 --> 00:02:50,203
When I see a man
about to go on a sea voyage
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and not wearing a topcoat,
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with no watch fob, and whose
spats are not fully buttoned...
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And the jewels hanging out of my hat?
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Yeah, and the jewels
hanging out of your hat.
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He's got a gun.
Look out, Stew... Holmes!
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00:03:03,951 --> 00:03:05,451
God, this is gonna be so annoying.
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00:03:05,452 --> 00:03:06,752
Watson, the scepter!
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Aah! Lucky shot.
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00:03:11,458 --> 00:03:13,059
There was no luck involved.
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00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:14,594
From the angle you were aiming the gun,
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I extrapolated the path of the bullet,
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00:03:16,396 --> 00:03:18,331
and triangulated the deflection point...
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Uh, is this... is this speech for me?
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Because he's dead.
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For the court's amusement,
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we now present Sir William of Cosby.
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00:03:34,815 --> 00:03:37,483
Well, you see, the children
of today are wearing
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their pantaloons so low, gazoozle,
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you can see the first three
layers of their undergarments,
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zazzle, zoozle.
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(SNORING)
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00:03:48,095 --> 00:03:52,298
I get away with this
for another 122 years, you see.
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00:03:52,299 --> 00:03:55,535
Hello, Your Majesty, I have
recovered the Crown Jewels.
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00:03:55,536 --> 00:03:57,870
Mum, may I say, it's been
a pleasure serving you,
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00:03:57,871 --> 00:03:59,505
but I've decided to retire.
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00:03:59,506 --> 00:04:02,475
We are losing interest
in this conversation.
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00:04:02,476 --> 00:04:05,845
It would be a wonderful cap on
my career to have a knighthood.
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Come, come, now, Holmes, you're not...
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(SNORING)
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COSBY: Sometimes the bigger ladies
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00:04:11,385 --> 00:04:13,985
take a little longer, you see.
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00:04:26,533 --> 00:04:28,401
Really, Holmes, why retire?
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00:04:28,402 --> 00:04:30,236
There will still be crimes to solve.
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00:04:30,237 --> 00:04:32,872
But with Moriarty gone,
and with you, my biographer,
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00:04:32,873 --> 00:04:35,508
leaving me for marriage,
there is little point.
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00:04:35,509 --> 00:04:37,710
Just gonna toss it in the old waste bin.
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00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:40,046
Yup. Good-bye, detective cap.
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00:04:40,047 --> 00:04:42,013
Yeah.
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00:04:44,184 --> 00:04:47,186
And you, old chap, are about
to solve the biggest mystery
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00:04:47,187 --> 00:04:50,022
facing men of our time:
The wedding night.
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00:04:50,023 --> 00:04:52,858
I know, I'm just, I'm just giddy
with anticipation.
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Lifting her nightgown,
nightshirt, evening cape,
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00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:58,030
boudoir coverall, torso doily,
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00:04:58,031 --> 00:05:00,333
and the various corsets
and trusses below.
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00:05:00,334 --> 00:05:02,168
Exposing her shame to God,
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00:05:02,169 --> 00:05:05,171
followed by brief missionary
coitus with no eye contact.
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00:05:05,172 --> 00:05:06,672
And then, five months later,
102
00:05:06,673 --> 00:05:09,342
a stillborn child
the size of a digestive biscuit.
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00:05:09,343 --> 00:05:10,643
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
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Constance.
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John.
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- Hey.
- 'Sup?
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00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:20,586
So, my betrothed,
how go the wedding plans?
108
00:05:20,587 --> 00:05:23,222
Oh, John, my father
is sparing no expense.
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00:05:23,223 --> 00:05:26,826
Boiled beef for every guest,
fish head stew, old cheese,
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00:05:26,827 --> 00:05:28,494
and men's attire will be provided
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00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:30,129
by Gentlemen's Wearhouse.
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00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:33,865
You're gonna fancy the way
you look, this I vouchsafe.
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What is it, Holmes?
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00:05:36,236 --> 00:05:37,336
It's an urgent missive
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00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,605
from Inspector Lestrade
of Scotland Yard.
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00:05:39,606 --> 00:05:42,942
Oh, darn, there's been a murder
and he's begging for my help.
117
00:05:42,943 --> 00:05:46,045
Oh, darn, darn, darn,
this is embarrassing.
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00:05:46,046 --> 00:05:49,348
Now I've got to see if I can
dig that hat out of the trash.
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00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:51,416
Come, Watson, the game is afoot.
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00:05:52,486 --> 00:05:53,619
"Afoot"?
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00:05:53,620 --> 00:05:55,121
"Starting," "beginning."
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00:05:55,122 --> 00:05:57,223
Well, then just say that.
123
00:05:57,224 --> 00:05:58,991
Enjoying all the old-timey jokes?
124
00:05:58,992 --> 00:06:02,527
Don't worry, next week,
back to a normal episode.
125
00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:09,935
Hmm, this is most curious.
126
00:06:09,936 --> 00:06:13,606
It appears she was killed by our
old nemesis, the Scottish Brute.
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00:06:13,607 --> 00:06:15,341
That's impossible, he's in prison.
128
00:06:15,342 --> 00:06:17,143
I put him there myself one year ago.
129
00:06:17,144 --> 00:06:19,512
Nevertheless,
we can't ignore the evidence.
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00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:21,213
All his victims were prostitutes
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whose names began with the letter "V."
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00:06:23,016 --> 00:06:25,651
This one's name is Veronica,
as evidenced
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by this satin softball jacket
that bears her name.
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00:06:29,489 --> 00:06:32,358
These threads are from
a Scotsman's plaid kilt.
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00:06:32,359 --> 00:06:35,294
The telltale locks of red hair.
136
00:06:35,295 --> 00:06:38,297
But most significantly,
the Scottish Brute replaced
137
00:06:38,298 --> 00:06:41,167
his victims' intestines with bagpipes.
138
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(BAGPIPE PLAYING)
139
00:06:42,969 --> 00:06:44,570
Want to give it a whirl?
140
00:06:44,571 --> 00:06:46,538
("HEART AND SOUL" PLAYING)
141
00:06:57,517 --> 00:06:59,518
How could he accomplish
this murder from prison?
142
00:06:59,519 --> 00:07:00,686
He couldn't.
143
00:07:00,687 --> 00:07:03,089
There are only
two possible explanations:
144
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:05,157
Either there's a murderer who has copied
145
00:07:05,158 --> 00:07:09,327
the Scottish Brute's methods,
or I put the wrong man away.
146
00:07:14,334 --> 00:07:16,434
(PEOPLE SHOUTING, GASPING)
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(GROWLS)
148
00:07:19,740 --> 00:07:21,407
(LAUGHTER)
149
00:07:21,408 --> 00:07:22,875
What are you in for?
150
00:07:22,876 --> 00:07:25,678
Ah, I Rathboned somebody's Cumberbatch.
151
00:07:25,679 --> 00:07:27,645
(LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE)
152
00:07:35,021 --> 00:07:36,555
Well, well, well.
153
00:07:36,556 --> 00:07:39,525
If it ain't me old nemesis,
Sherlock Holmes.
154
00:07:39,526 --> 00:07:41,527
Hello, Brute, I've got
some questions for you.
155
00:07:41,528 --> 00:07:43,596
Who did you tell about the murders?
156
00:07:43,597 --> 00:07:46,465
Nae a soul, 'cause I dinna
commit no murders.
157
00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,234
I'm innocent, you nosy parker.
158
00:07:48,235 --> 00:07:49,402
How can I believe you?
159
00:07:49,403 --> 00:07:50,870
You're a common criminal.
160
00:07:50,871 --> 00:07:54,540
All the prostitutes were killed
by a left-handed assailant.
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00:07:54,541 --> 00:07:56,976
- So?
- So, I was born with...
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two right hands.
163
00:07:58,745 --> 00:08:00,446
- (BOTH GASP)
- Dear God.
164
00:08:00,447 --> 00:08:02,548
That means he couldn't
have been the killer.
165
00:08:02,549 --> 00:08:06,485
That's right. You ever seen
a man with two right hand...
166
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,220
Oh, this... this thing was open.
167
00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:09,555
That shouldn't be open, right?
168
00:08:09,556 --> 00:08:11,184
No, no, I wouldn't think so.
169
00:08:12,425 --> 00:08:14,155
[STREET NOISE]
170
00:08:14,156 --> 00:08:16,917
[DING]
171
00:08:16,918 --> 00:08:19,586
I hope you will accept
my sincere apologies.
172
00:08:19,587 --> 00:08:22,055
Oh, you've done more than
made up for it, Mr. Holmes.
173
00:08:22,056 --> 00:08:23,857
I'm just happy to be free.
174
00:08:23,858 --> 00:08:26,293
Ah, the world's changed
since I've been in there.
175
00:08:26,294 --> 00:08:28,261
That puddle wasn't here.
176
00:08:28,262 --> 00:08:29,896
That cloud wasn't there.
177
00:08:29,897 --> 00:08:31,732
That window was open.
178
00:08:31,733 --> 00:08:33,967
That lady was four feet that way.
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00:08:33,968 --> 00:08:35,702
All right, well, I hope
you make a go of it.
180
00:08:35,703 --> 00:08:37,404
Good luck with your fresh start.
181
00:08:37,405 --> 00:08:39,840
PETER: Oh, where'd that bird come from?
182
00:08:39,841 --> 00:08:41,307
That's new.
183
00:08:46,013 --> 00:08:48,849
Watson, I found
some important new clues.
184
00:08:48,850 --> 00:08:51,284
These red locks of hair
I found at the crime scene?
185
00:08:51,285 --> 00:08:53,253
They don't belong to the Scottish Brute.
186
00:08:53,254 --> 00:08:54,955
They belong to a woman.
187
00:08:54,956 --> 00:08:55,956
How can you tell?
188
00:08:55,957 --> 00:08:57,357
It's hard to explain, Watson.
189
00:08:57,358 --> 00:08:58,825
Women are mysterious.
190
00:08:58,826 --> 00:09:00,093
But don't ask me.
191
00:09:00,094 --> 00:09:03,263
Ask contemporary personality
Oscar Wilde.
192
00:09:03,264 --> 00:09:08,034
I prefer a man with a future
and a woman with a past.
193
00:09:08,035 --> 00:09:09,236
(LAUGHING): Oh, splendid.
194
00:09:09,237 --> 00:09:11,104
Well said, splendid.
195
00:09:11,105 --> 00:09:12,973
All right, let's get out of here
before we're all arrested
196
00:09:12,974 --> 00:09:15,474
for the crime of "bum-fancy."
197
00:09:18,146 --> 00:09:22,716
And now I will disguise myself
as a prostitute named Valerie.
198
00:09:22,717 --> 00:09:24,117
What the devil is that?
199
00:09:24,118 --> 00:09:25,352
It's my own invention.
200
00:09:25,353 --> 00:09:27,487
A steam-driven mechanical exoskeleton.
201
00:09:27,488 --> 00:09:28,788
Observe.
202
00:09:30,458 --> 00:09:32,124
(WHIRRING)
203
00:09:33,528 --> 00:09:36,730
It's cutting-edge technology, Watson!
204
00:09:36,731 --> 00:09:38,331
ROBOTIC FEMALE VOICE: Exchange money
205
00:09:38,332 --> 00:09:40,367
for sexual services, guv'nor.
206
00:09:40,368 --> 00:09:41,435
Are you a bobby?
207
00:09:41,436 --> 00:09:42,536
You have to tell me.
208
00:09:42,537 --> 00:09:43,804
Mind the gap.
209
00:09:43,805 --> 00:09:45,238
Astounding.
210
00:09:45,239 --> 00:09:47,574
Yes. Now, I'll stroll around the block,
211
00:09:47,575 --> 00:09:50,744
and you'll proposition me, loud
enough so the killer can hear.
212
00:09:50,745 --> 00:09:52,212
Love for sale.
213
00:09:52,213 --> 00:09:54,815
Appetizing young love for sale.
214
00:09:54,816 --> 00:09:57,117
♪ Love that's fresh
and still unspoiled ♪
215
00:09:57,118 --> 00:09:59,553
♪ Love that's only slightly soiled... ♪
216
00:09:59,554 --> 00:10:00,687
Love for sale.
217
00:10:00,688 --> 00:10:01,855
Lookin' good, honey.
218
00:10:01,856 --> 00:10:02,956
STEWIE: No blacks.
219
00:10:02,957 --> 00:10:04,357
Love for sale.
220
00:10:04,358 --> 00:10:06,992
Race-contingent love for sale.
221
00:10:13,734 --> 00:10:16,837
Did I hear your name was Valerie?
222
00:10:16,838 --> 00:10:18,071
Yeah, guv'nor.
223
00:10:18,072 --> 00:10:19,239
Uh, have we met?
224
00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,540
Your voice sounds very familiar.
225
00:10:26,781 --> 00:10:29,014
- (GASPS)
- (GRUNTING)
226
00:10:30,351 --> 00:10:31,952
What the hell is this?
227
00:10:31,953 --> 00:10:33,153
STEWIE: Watson, hurry!
228
00:10:33,154 --> 00:10:34,387
Watson?
229
00:10:34,388 --> 00:10:35,956
Oh, my God, Sherlock!
230
00:10:35,957 --> 00:10:38,859
ROBOTIC FEMALE VOICE: Watson, help.
231
00:10:38,860 --> 00:10:40,626
(DISTORTED): Watson.
232
00:10:42,663 --> 00:10:46,500
All I would've done
is be a perfect gentleman.
233
00:10:46,501 --> 00:10:48,168
Sorry, got distracted.
234
00:10:48,169 --> 00:10:50,270
Lot of rats in London.
235
00:10:50,271 --> 00:10:51,737
That's for you.
236
00:10:55,510 --> 00:10:57,377
Sorry we didn't
catch the murderer, Holmes.
237
00:10:57,378 --> 00:10:59,412
And I'm afraid you'll
have to catch her without me.
238
00:10:59,413 --> 00:11:00,714
My wedding is tomorrow.
239
00:11:00,715 --> 00:11:02,382
Yes, about that, you know,
I was thinking.
240
00:11:02,383 --> 00:11:04,484
Maybe you should put that off
for a little while.
241
00:11:04,485 --> 00:11:06,620
You know, sow a few more wild oats.
242
00:11:06,621 --> 00:11:08,255
Oh, I've done enough of that, my friend,
243
00:11:08,256 --> 00:11:10,457
especially after that
raucous bachelor party trip
244
00:11:10,458 --> 00:11:12,324
you threw for me in Las Vegas.
245
00:11:14,996 --> 00:11:17,397
So... when do the strippers arrive?
246
00:11:17,398 --> 00:11:19,633
1952.
247
00:11:19,634 --> 00:11:22,669
Watson, I don't know
how to tell you this...
248
00:11:22,670 --> 00:11:25,305
but the murderer
we've been looking for...
249
00:11:25,306 --> 00:11:27,073
it's your fiancée, Constance.
250
00:11:27,074 --> 00:11:29,175
You lie! You're just jealous!
251
00:11:29,176 --> 00:11:31,278
Well, let's go to her place
and I'll show you.
252
00:11:31,279 --> 00:11:34,247
Sorry, today was y'all's cleaning day.
253
00:11:34,248 --> 00:11:36,082
Y'all want me to come back later?
254
00:11:36,083 --> 00:11:37,417
M-Maybe, maybe, yeah.
255
00:11:37,418 --> 00:11:38,818
M-Maybe, maybe another day.
256
00:11:38,819 --> 00:11:40,453
JEFFREY: That's fine, I'll pull out.
257
00:11:40,454 --> 00:11:43,290
Just go easy,
it really hurt on the way in.
258
00:11:43,291 --> 00:11:45,992
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
259
00:11:45,993 --> 00:11:47,927
(QUIETER): Ow! Ow! Ow!
260
00:11:52,233 --> 00:11:55,502
Constance? Are you here?
261
00:11:55,503 --> 00:11:58,405
She's... she's gone.
262
00:11:58,406 --> 00:12:00,340
I'm sorry, Watson. Unfortunately,
263
00:12:00,341 --> 00:12:02,475
it appears my deductions were correct.
264
00:12:02,476 --> 00:12:04,578
Not so fast. Look, she left a note.
265
00:12:04,579 --> 00:12:06,479
See, Holmes? It says here...
266
00:12:06,480 --> 00:12:09,215
these are test results.
She has gonorrhea.
267
00:12:09,216 --> 00:12:10,650
(SIGHS): I...
268
00:12:10,651 --> 00:12:12,319
I can't believe it.
269
00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:14,521
My beloved Constance is the murderer.
270
00:12:14,522 --> 00:12:16,089
It's even worse than you think.
271
00:12:16,090 --> 00:12:18,425
If she's a murderer
from this time period,
272
00:12:18,426 --> 00:12:20,994
that means there will be
a terrible, pretentious musical
273
00:12:20,995 --> 00:12:22,629
about her one day.
274
00:12:22,630 --> 00:12:25,031
♪ ♪
275
00:12:25,032 --> 00:12:27,601
♪ Behold the tale of Constance ♪
276
00:12:27,602 --> 00:12:30,136
♪ The murderer in the bonnet ♪
277
00:12:30,137 --> 00:12:34,007
♪ The murderer in the bonnet. ♪
278
00:12:34,008 --> 00:12:36,343
Oh, I was wrong, I love it.
279
00:12:36,344 --> 00:12:37,677
ENGLISH ANNOUNCER:
Will Watson and Holmes
280
00:12:37,678 --> 00:12:39,145
track down Constance?
281
00:12:39,146 --> 00:12:40,447
We'll be right back
282
00:12:40,448 --> 00:12:42,749
after these
turn of the century messages.
283
00:12:42,750 --> 00:12:46,586
(SIGHS) Another dull night
at the gentlemen's club.
284
00:12:46,587 --> 00:12:49,289
What we need is
some room temperature gin.
285
00:12:49,290 --> 00:12:50,724
'Ello, gents.
286
00:12:50,725 --> 00:12:52,959
Fancy some Room Temperature Gin?
287
00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:54,361
Shut up, you slag!
288
00:12:54,362 --> 00:12:55,795
No women allowed.
289
00:12:55,796 --> 00:12:57,497
ENGLISH ANNOUNCER: Room Temperature Gin:
290
00:12:57,498 --> 00:12:58,765
Drink it without women,
291
00:12:58,766 --> 00:13:00,566
have an eel pie, then go to bed.
292
00:13:01,971 --> 00:13:05,032
♪
293
00:13:05,033 --> 00:13:08,002
Constance had the tickets
for our honeymoon to Paris.
294
00:13:08,003 --> 00:13:09,904
No doubt she'll be using those
for her escape.
295
00:13:09,905 --> 00:13:11,605
Very well. Then we're off to France.
296
00:13:11,606 --> 00:13:14,075
That's right. We're off to Gay Paree.
297
00:13:14,076 --> 00:13:15,910
- What's this now?
- Gay Paree.
298
00:13:15,911 --> 00:13:17,411
Some... some people call it "Gay Paree."
299
00:13:17,412 --> 00:13:19,813
Oh, then I suppose I should change.
300
00:13:21,850 --> 00:13:25,686
Let's get separate rooms just so
we can spread our stuff out.
301
00:13:25,687 --> 00:13:27,654
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
302
00:13:32,727 --> 00:13:34,228
Quick, we've got to catch the train!
303
00:13:34,229 --> 00:13:36,229
Porter!
304
00:13:38,066 --> 00:13:39,800
Watson, do you have thruppence
for the porter?
305
00:13:39,801 --> 00:13:40,968
I have tuppence.
306
00:13:40,969 --> 00:13:42,103
So you don't have thruppence?
307
00:13:42,104 --> 00:13:43,804
I have tuppence. How much do you have?
308
00:13:43,805 --> 00:13:44,972
I have nuppence.
309
00:13:44,973 --> 00:13:46,707
You're gonna get a comeuppance.
310
00:13:46,708 --> 00:13:49,577
♪ ♪
311
00:13:49,578 --> 00:13:51,544
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
312
00:13:52,914 --> 00:13:55,683
Excuse me, sir, what's the next
stop for this train?
313
00:13:55,684 --> 00:13:57,551
(BABBLING)
314
00:13:57,552 --> 00:14:00,554
Ugh, I hate when they let
the infirm ride on the train.
315
00:14:00,555 --> 00:14:04,458
Next stop, (BABBLING) Station.
316
00:14:04,459 --> 00:14:07,928
Sir, you owe an apology to me
and all the good people
317
00:14:07,929 --> 00:14:11,398
of (BABBLING).
318
00:14:11,399 --> 00:14:14,969
It's nice of the locals to act
as their own train crossings.
319
00:14:14,970 --> 00:14:17,937
Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding,
ding, ding, ding, ding.
320
00:14:24,412 --> 00:14:26,413
♪ ♪
321
00:14:26,414 --> 00:14:28,415
You know, I've never crossed
the English Channel before.
322
00:14:28,416 --> 00:14:30,151
I hope no one from the train
is on this boat.
323
00:14:30,152 --> 00:14:31,318
I'm wearing the same outfit.
324
00:14:31,319 --> 00:14:32,686
I wouldn't worry.
325
00:14:32,687 --> 00:14:35,089
Looks like it's just a bunch
of minor celebrities.
326
00:14:35,090 --> 00:14:37,090
("LOVE BOAT THEME" PLAYING)
327
00:14:44,866 --> 00:14:46,666
♪ Love ♪
328
00:14:48,603 --> 00:14:52,640
♪ Exciting and new ♪
329
00:14:52,641 --> 00:14:54,108
♪ Come aboard. ♪
330
00:14:54,109 --> 00:14:56,042
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
331
00:15:00,115 --> 00:15:02,082
Finally, Paris.
332
00:15:02,083 --> 00:15:03,784
What an ordeal.
333
00:15:03,785 --> 00:15:05,119
Yes, but how do we find Constance
334
00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:06,287
in one of the biggest cities...
335
00:15:06,288 --> 00:15:07,588
There she is.
336
00:15:09,157 --> 00:15:10,758
Quick, after her. We have to chase her
337
00:15:10,759 --> 00:15:12,293
through a series of shots where she has
338
00:15:12,294 --> 00:15:14,628
an inconsistent lead on us.
339
00:15:14,629 --> 00:15:17,197
♪ ♪
340
00:15:42,190 --> 00:15:43,357
This way, Holmes.
341
00:15:43,358 --> 00:15:45,125
She's heading towards... Holmes?
342
00:15:45,126 --> 00:15:47,628
I couldn't come here and not do this.
343
00:15:47,629 --> 00:15:49,963
She has appendicitis, by the way.
344
00:15:55,170 --> 00:15:56,570
She must have gone up
this strange building.
345
00:15:56,571 --> 00:15:57,705
What is it?
346
00:15:57,706 --> 00:15:59,139
It's the brand-new Eiffel Tower.
347
00:15:59,140 --> 00:16:00,407
Well, let's hurry.
348
00:16:00,408 --> 00:16:02,042
- She's getting...
- Oh, oh, hold on, hold on.
349
00:16:02,043 --> 00:16:03,377
I think we may have just photobombed
350
00:16:03,378 --> 00:16:04,678
that family's picture.
351
00:16:09,251 --> 00:16:12,619
♪ ♪
352
00:16:21,730 --> 00:16:23,564
You'll never catch me.
353
00:16:23,565 --> 00:16:25,065
(SHOUTS)
354
00:16:25,066 --> 00:16:27,200
Damn it, my heel is caught. (GRUNTS)
355
00:16:28,169 --> 00:16:30,070
(SHOUTS)
356
00:16:30,071 --> 00:16:31,371
Constance!
357
00:16:32,507 --> 00:16:33,674
Hang on, my darling.
358
00:16:33,675 --> 00:16:37,011
John, I did it for him.
359
00:16:37,012 --> 00:16:39,046
And you didn't mean to hurt me?
360
00:16:39,047 --> 00:16:41,248
No, you're not getting what I'm saying.
361
00:16:41,249 --> 00:16:43,584
I didn't care about you at all.
362
00:16:43,585 --> 00:16:45,019
Who did you do this for?
363
00:16:45,020 --> 00:16:47,521
Why were you killing prostitutes
with the initial "V"?
364
00:16:47,522 --> 00:16:48,856
(LAUGHS)
365
00:16:48,857 --> 00:16:50,758
The great Sherlock Holmes.
366
00:16:50,759 --> 00:16:52,760
He said you'd never figure it out,
367
00:16:52,761 --> 00:16:55,062
and that he'd be victorious.
368
00:16:55,063 --> 00:16:56,263
(LAUGHS)
369
00:16:56,264 --> 00:16:58,932
(SCREAMS)
370
00:16:58,933 --> 00:17:00,100
Constance!
371
00:17:00,101 --> 00:17:01,601
(THUMPS)
372
00:17:04,105 --> 00:17:07,408
Ugh. Depardieu!
373
00:17:07,409 --> 00:17:09,375
(CHEERING, APPLAUSE)
374
00:17:12,914 --> 00:17:15,916
I can't believe she's gone, Holmes.
375
00:17:15,917 --> 00:17:17,318
Oh, you'll find someone.
376
00:17:17,319 --> 00:17:19,053
You're a good guy with a great body.
377
00:17:19,054 --> 00:17:20,721
I still don't understand what she meant
378
00:17:20,722 --> 00:17:23,090
by "he said you'd never
figure it out, and..."
379
00:17:23,091 --> 00:17:24,591
"That he'd be victorious."
380
00:17:24,592 --> 00:17:26,260
Watson, that's it.
381
00:17:26,261 --> 00:17:28,062
Didn't think I'd figure it out.
382
00:17:28,063 --> 00:17:31,465
This calls for the old Sherlock
Holmes celebratory smoke.
383
00:17:31,466 --> 00:17:32,932
I'll just light my pipe.
384
00:17:36,237 --> 00:17:38,238
(THUNDER CRASHES)
385
00:17:38,239 --> 00:17:40,206
(WIND HOWLING)
386
00:17:55,757 --> 00:17:57,858
What is the meaning of this?
387
00:17:57,859 --> 00:17:59,860
I'll be replacing your innards
388
00:17:59,861 --> 00:18:02,129
with these bagpipes, Queen Victoria.
389
00:18:02,130 --> 00:18:05,032
Not before we put you in jail.
390
00:18:05,033 --> 00:18:06,233
What's with this "we" crap?
391
00:18:06,234 --> 00:18:07,368
It's just you.
392
00:18:07,369 --> 00:18:11,271
Oh, no, it's "we."
393
00:18:11,272 --> 00:18:12,372
(GASPS)
394
00:18:12,373 --> 00:18:14,575
We made it just in time.
395
00:18:14,576 --> 00:18:17,878
And I was able to fool you,
as I am a master of disguise.
396
00:18:17,879 --> 00:18:20,447
Seems like you're just good
at dressing up like a woman.
397
00:18:20,448 --> 00:18:22,349
Ah, you caught me, Mr. Holmes.
398
00:18:22,350 --> 00:18:24,485
I suppose it's back to jail for me.
399
00:18:24,486 --> 00:18:28,021
You can dispense with the act,
Professor Moriarty.
400
00:18:28,022 --> 00:18:29,356
Holmes, what are you talking about?
401
00:18:29,357 --> 00:18:30,991
Moriarty's dead. You killed him.
402
00:18:30,992 --> 00:18:32,926
No, that was one of his lackeys.
403
00:18:32,927 --> 00:18:34,862
Isn't that right, Professor?
404
00:18:34,863 --> 00:18:36,663
(NORMAL VOICE): Very clever, Holmes.
405
00:18:36,664 --> 00:18:38,198
What gave me away?
406
00:18:38,199 --> 00:18:41,502
Constance. She said
that you'd be victorious.
407
00:18:41,503 --> 00:18:43,036
That was the vital clue
408
00:18:43,037 --> 00:18:45,472
that these murders were for my benefit.
409
00:18:45,473 --> 00:18:47,808
I was dismantling your criminal empire,
410
00:18:47,809 --> 00:18:49,308
and you wanted revenge.
411
00:18:57,519 --> 00:19:00,287
You cannot catch what you cannot see.
412
00:19:00,288 --> 00:19:02,990
(EVIL LAUGHTER)
413
00:19:02,991 --> 00:19:05,993
STEWIE: So, you concocted
an elaborate series of murders
414
00:19:05,994 --> 00:19:07,094
with clues leading me
415
00:19:07,095 --> 00:19:09,163
to the fictional Scottish Brute.
416
00:19:09,164 --> 00:19:11,498
Meanwhile, two toothless,
British homeless people
417
00:19:11,499 --> 00:19:13,367
had filthy sex in an alleyway.
418
00:19:13,368 --> 00:19:14,902
They would become the grandparents
419
00:19:14,903 --> 00:19:16,469
of the guys from Oasis.
420
00:19:19,073 --> 00:19:21,008
Meanwhile, you had your girlfriend
421
00:19:21,009 --> 00:19:22,508
seduce my best friend.
422
00:19:28,349 --> 00:19:30,116
She arranges for me
to kill your imposter...
423
00:19:31,252 --> 00:19:33,821
and commits an identical murder
424
00:19:33,822 --> 00:19:36,790
so I would come
to the inescapable conclusion
425
00:19:36,791 --> 00:19:38,459
that I put the wrong man away.
426
00:19:38,460 --> 00:19:40,527
Constance would lead us
away from England
427
00:19:40,528 --> 00:19:42,729
while you killed the last "prostitute"
428
00:19:42,730 --> 00:19:44,031
with the name "V."
429
00:19:44,032 --> 00:19:45,866
And I'd get the blame
for freeing the man
430
00:19:45,867 --> 00:19:47,734
who killed our beloved queen.
431
00:19:47,735 --> 00:19:48,969
Brilliant.
432
00:19:48,970 --> 00:19:51,138
Why do you think
Queen Victoria's a prostitute?
433
00:19:51,139 --> 00:19:52,973
She formed an alliance
with the Dutch royals
434
00:19:52,974 --> 00:19:55,042
for shared control of Guyana.
435
00:19:55,043 --> 00:19:56,710
So... political.
436
00:19:56,711 --> 00:19:58,812
One last mystery to solve.
437
00:19:58,813 --> 00:20:00,747
Why do they call you Professor?
438
00:20:00,748 --> 00:20:02,583
- I teach at Hogwarts.
- Really?
439
00:20:02,584 --> 00:20:05,719
No. But we should've done that
instead of this.
440
00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:08,688
(VIOLIN PLAYING)
441
00:20:09,724 --> 00:20:11,758
Holmes, with this case,
442
00:20:11,759 --> 00:20:13,861
you saved the entire British Empire.
443
00:20:13,862 --> 00:20:16,029
Yes. Now it will last forever.
444
00:20:16,030 --> 00:20:18,131
From South Africa to the Suez Canal,
445
00:20:18,132 --> 00:20:19,833
from Cyprus to Australia,
446
00:20:19,834 --> 00:20:21,702
all of Canada and Grenada,
447
00:20:21,703 --> 00:20:24,471
even Antigua and Jamaica.
448
00:20:24,472 --> 00:20:26,373
India, Jordan, Kenya, Kuwait,
449
00:20:26,374 --> 00:20:28,408
Malawi, Bermuda, the Falklands.
450
00:20:28,409 --> 00:20:30,610
Yes, all part of our empire.
451
00:20:32,413 --> 00:20:33,714
I'll always miss...
452
00:20:33,715 --> 00:20:34,982
The Maldives, Myanmar,
453
00:20:34,983 --> 00:20:36,950
New Zealand, Nigeria, Pakistan.
454
00:20:36,951 --> 00:20:38,685
Saint Kitts and Nevis.
455
00:20:38,686 --> 00:20:40,654
Sri Lanka, the Sudan, Uganda,
456
00:20:40,655 --> 00:20:42,322
and the United Arab Emirates.
457
00:20:42,323 --> 00:20:44,258
BRIAN: God, England sucks now.
458
00:20:44,259 --> 00:20:46,225
(VIOLIN PLAYING FAMILY GUY THEME)
459
00:20:47,225 --> 00:20:50,725
- Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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