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1
00:00:05,965 --> 00:00:08,259
(TRAIN WHISTLE)
2
00:00:13,097 --> 00:00:14,765
(ENGINE DRONING)
3
00:00:53,471 --> 00:00:55,014
(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)
4
00:00:59,518 --> 00:01:02,021
-(CHEERING)
-Thank you.
5
00:01:02,064 --> 00:01:04,190
Thank you, everybody.
6
00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:06,567
-(WHISTLING)
-Thank you.
7
00:01:12,907 --> 00:01:15,284
-(RENEWED CHEERING)
-Thank you.
8
00:01:15,326 --> 00:01:17,203
-We're back!
-(CHEERING)
9
00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:19,038
We are back!
10
00:01:20,664 --> 00:01:23,834
Thank you very much,
everyone, and welcome.
11
00:01:23,876 --> 00:01:26,962
Welcome to our
permanent new home
12
00:01:27,004 --> 00:01:30,382
here in the green heart
of England-land.
13
00:01:30,424 --> 00:01:33,761
-(CHEERING)
-Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah!
14
00:01:36,972 --> 00:01:42,019
Can I just say, it's not so
much green as inconvenient.
15
00:01:42,061 --> 00:01:43,521
Why is it inconvenient?
16
00:01:43,562 --> 00:01:45,689
Well, Jeremy,
tell the ladies and gentlemen
17
00:01:45,731 --> 00:01:49,151
why you decided to put
our tent precisely here.
18
00:01:49,193 --> 00:01:52,738
Ah, it is exactly here
because this spot
19
00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:56,492
is exactly half way
between May's house
and Hammond's house.
20
00:01:56,534 --> 00:01:58,202
So there is no squabbling
21
00:01:58,244 --> 00:02:00,663
over who had
the longest commute.
22
00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:02,998
Yes, but your house
is just over there.
23
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:05,209
-(LAUGHTER)
-I can see it, just there.
24
00:02:05,251 --> 00:02:07,878
I haven't got a house.
You may remember
you blew it up.
25
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:09,755
Oh, all right,
your backup house.
26
00:02:09,797 --> 00:02:12,132
Yeah, your spare house
is just there.
27
00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:12,134
Yeah, your spare house
is just there.
Let's not get bogged down
with whose house
is the nearest.
28
00:02:12,134 --> 00:02:16,387
Let's not get bogged down
with whose house
is the nearest.
29
00:02:16,428 --> 00:02:18,514
It's yours. Definitely yours.
30
00:02:18,556 --> 00:02:21,141
-Is that your cat?
-(LAUGHTER)
31
00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:21,143
-Is that your cat?
-(LAUGHTER)
The point is...
32
00:02:21,143 --> 00:02:23,143
The point is...
33
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:23,145
The point is...
Oh, hang on, Jezza,
you've got a parcel.
34
00:02:23,145 --> 00:02:25,688
Oh, hang on, Jezza,
you've got a parcel.
35
00:02:25,729 --> 00:02:27,565
(LAUGHTER)
36
00:02:27,606 --> 00:02:29,483
No, I can tell there's
a man putting one of those
37
00:02:29,525 --> 00:02:32,444
"I can't be arsed
to ring the doorbell" cards
through the letterbox.
38
00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:35,489
The tent is located here,
yes.
39
00:02:35,531 --> 00:02:38,367
But this is still very much
The Grand Tour.
40
00:02:38,409 --> 00:02:40,619
The globe is still
our playground,
41
00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:43,163
as you will see
from this short clip
42
00:02:43,205 --> 00:02:47,126
of what's coming up
over the next 11 weeks.
43
00:02:47,169 --> 00:02:49,753
♪ THE WHO:
Won't Get Fooled Again
44
00:02:56,135 --> 00:02:58,345
OK, it's time now and...
45
00:02:58,387 --> 00:03:01,348
nobody's ever said this
on a car show before,
46
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:02,975
to save the world.
47
00:03:13,152 --> 00:03:14,737
(CLATTERING)
48
00:03:15,779 --> 00:03:17,114
Morning, shoppers.
49
00:03:17,156 --> 00:03:20,576
♪ We'll be fighting
in the streets ♪
50
00:03:20,618 --> 00:03:24,246
-♪ With our children
at our feet ♪
-Oh, my giddy aunt!
51
00:03:24,288 --> 00:03:29,460
♪ And the morals that
they worship will be gone ♪
52
00:03:29,501 --> 00:03:31,378
Holy shit.
53
00:03:31,420 --> 00:03:35,466
♪ I'll tip my hat
to the new constitution ♪
54
00:03:35,507 --> 00:03:38,719
-Here they come!
-♪ Take a bow
for the new revolution ♪
55
00:03:38,761 --> 00:03:42,306
-♪ Pick up my guitar
and play ♪
-Oh, here we go again!
56
00:03:42,348 --> 00:03:45,643
-♪ Just like yesterday ♪
-(LAUGHING)
57
00:03:45,684 --> 00:03:48,479
♪ Then I'll get on my knees
and pray ♪
58
00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:52,816
Way. Get out of the way.
I'm in a race.
59
00:03:52,858 --> 00:03:55,277
♪ We don't get fooled again ♪
60
00:03:56,862 --> 00:03:58,781
♪ Don't get fooled again ♪
61
00:03:58,822 --> 00:04:00,449
Extending fuel nozzle.
62
00:04:00,491 --> 00:04:02,242
We are pumping gas!
63
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:02,244
We are pumping gas!
(EXPLOSION)
64
00:04:02,244 --> 00:04:03,494
(EXPLOSION)
65
00:04:04,912 --> 00:04:06,580
Have we got to drive
up there?
66
00:04:09,792 --> 00:04:13,712
Fire service is now
available in your area.
67
00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:16,924
(RICHARD LAUGHS)
Charge!
68
00:04:18,968 --> 00:04:21,136
I'm better than him.
69
00:04:23,973 --> 00:04:26,934
-Bollocks!
-(THEY LAUGH)
70
00:04:33,023 --> 00:04:36,902
-(EXPLOSION)
-You're gonna have to work
a bit harder, Jaguar!
71
00:04:39,697 --> 00:04:41,407
(MUSIC ENDS)
72
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:44,493
(CHEERING)
73
00:04:44,535 --> 00:04:47,788
We've been busy.
We have been very busy.
74
00:04:49,206 --> 00:04:52,793
Anyway, that...
that is all to come.
75
00:04:52,835 --> 00:04:54,712
This, however, is now.
76
00:04:54,753 --> 00:04:56,880
And we have
an important job to do.
77
00:04:56,922 --> 00:04:59,008
An important question
to answer.
78
00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:02,636
Which is better? The past,
the present, or the future?
79
00:05:02,678 --> 00:05:04,847
By which I mean,
which is better -
80
00:05:04,888 --> 00:05:09,560
petrol power, hybrid power,
or electrical power?
81
00:05:09,601 --> 00:05:13,897
Now, to do this,
we are going to use
the Lamborghini Aventador S,
82
00:05:13,939 --> 00:05:18,318
which has a petrol engine
and is therefore from
the pages of ancient history.
83
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:20,821
And that will be driven by
our resident Neanderthal.
84
00:05:20,863 --> 00:05:23,991
(LAUGHTER)
85
00:05:24,033 --> 00:05:26,577
Representing the present day,
we have the Honda NSX,
86
00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:28,162
which is a modern hybrid.
87
00:05:28,203 --> 00:05:32,374
And that, obviously,
will be driven by somebody
crisp and contemporary.
88
00:05:32,416 --> 00:05:34,209
-Me.
-Yeah!
89
00:05:34,251 --> 00:05:35,586
-(LAUGHTER)
-Yeah.
90
00:05:35,627 --> 00:05:38,380
And I shall be driving
something from the future.
91
00:05:38,422 --> 00:05:40,591
An all-electric supercar
from Croatia.
92
00:05:40,632 --> 00:05:43,093
JEREMY: We know
how that ends.
-Yeah.
93
00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:44,386
-(LAUGHTER)
-Yeah.
94
00:05:44,428 --> 00:05:46,055
And... And...
95
00:05:46,096 --> 00:05:47,556
And while we're on...
96
00:05:47,598 --> 00:05:51,018
(APPLAUSE)
97
00:05:51,060 --> 00:05:54,980
And while... while we are on
the subject of me,
98
00:05:55,022 --> 00:05:57,900
I decided to take charge of
where we would do this test.
99
00:05:57,941 --> 00:06:02,112
I'm tired of these two
picking places that
I don't like or understand.
100
00:06:02,154 --> 00:06:04,239
Which is why this week
The Grand Tour
101
00:06:04,281 --> 00:06:05,991
is off to Switzerland.
102
00:06:34,061 --> 00:06:37,481
Well, here it is.
The Rimac Concept One.
103
00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:41,276
The world's first
electric supercar.
104
00:06:41,318 --> 00:06:43,320
(ENGINE WHIRRING)
105
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:51,662
And listen to that.
The hills are alive with
the sound of, well, nothing.
106
00:06:54,581 --> 00:06:56,166
It's amazing.
107
00:06:58,168 --> 00:07:00,671
(ENGINES ROARING)
108
00:07:00,712 --> 00:07:03,799
At least it was
until they turned up.
109
00:07:03,841 --> 00:07:06,218
-Listen to that.
-(ENGINES ROARING)
110
00:07:16,061 --> 00:07:19,439
JEREMY: Look, everything
was better in the past.
111
00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:19,441
JEREMY: Look, everything
was better in the past.
Christopher Wren
was a better architect
112
00:07:19,441 --> 00:07:22,067
Christopher Wren
was a better architect
113
00:07:22,109 --> 00:07:25,487
than those numpties you see
on Grand Designs.
114
00:07:25,529 --> 00:07:29,950
Bob Seger
could belt out a better tune
than Justin Bieber.
115
00:07:29,992 --> 00:07:33,996
And this Lamborghini
is better than Hammond's
lady shaver.
116
00:07:34,037 --> 00:07:36,373
It just is - in every way.
117
00:07:42,171 --> 00:07:43,547
(COMPUTER BLEEPING)
118
00:07:43,589 --> 00:07:45,841
JAMES: No,
the present is best.
119
00:07:45,883 --> 00:07:49,136
Everything in the world now
is better than it was
a minute ago.
120
00:07:49,178 --> 00:07:52,347
Everything in the world now
is better than it's going
to be in another minute,
121
00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:53,849
because we don't know
what that is yet.
122
00:07:53,891 --> 00:07:56,018
It might be
the nuclear holocaust.
123
00:07:56,059 --> 00:07:58,979
Human kind can only
live in the present,
124
00:07:59,021 --> 00:08:02,065
and that's why you need
a Honda NSX. OK?
125
00:08:04,735 --> 00:08:09,406
The NSX
is by far the cleverest
of the three cars here.
126
00:08:09,448 --> 00:08:11,909
Because of its
dual powertrain.
127
00:08:15,579 --> 00:08:17,456
It has the dependability,
128
00:08:17,499 --> 00:08:19,875
the availability,
of fossil fuels.
129
00:08:19,917 --> 00:08:24,338
And the magic
and helpfulness,
if you like, of electricity.
130
00:08:24,379 --> 00:08:27,549
It's a hybrid and it
really is rather brilliant.
131
00:08:30,928 --> 00:08:33,138
RICHARD:
They probably think this is
132
00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:37,809
some sort of Eastern European
electric milk float
in a supercar suit.
133
00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:39,686
Well, they're wrong.
Very wrong.
134
00:08:47,277 --> 00:08:50,614
I have four
massive electric motors here.
135
00:08:50,656 --> 00:08:52,532
One for each wheel.
136
00:08:52,574 --> 00:08:56,620
So I'm in
a 1,241 brake horsepower,
137
00:08:56,662 --> 00:08:58,622
all-electric supercar.
138
00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:03,794
The speed in this
is other-worldly,
139
00:09:03,835 --> 00:09:06,630
because it's achieved
so silently.
140
00:09:06,672 --> 00:09:10,008
It's funny, isn't it? I'm
shouting but I don't need to.
141
00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:11,551
I could talk quietly.
142
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:11,553
I could talk quietly.
Even when I'm
accelerating hard.
143
00:09:11,553 --> 00:09:13,470
Even when I'm
accelerating hard.
144
00:09:13,512 --> 00:09:16,431
(WHIRRING)
145
00:09:16,473 --> 00:09:18,558
I know the Rimac
is very pretty.
146
00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:20,060
I can see that.
147
00:09:20,102 --> 00:09:21,979
And I know it's very fast.
148
00:09:22,020 --> 00:09:25,649
But I also know...
it can't do this.
149
00:09:25,691 --> 00:09:27,734
(ENGINE ROARING)
150
00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:39,288
Oh, my God!
151
00:09:46,420 --> 00:09:49,840
That is
a six-and-a-half-litre V12.
152
00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:55,012
Turning petrol into noise.
(CACKLES)
153
00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:09,443
Come on, Hammond, admit it.
154
00:10:09,484 --> 00:10:11,737
That is one hell of a noise.
155
00:10:11,778 --> 00:10:13,405
It is cannon fire.
156
00:10:13,447 --> 00:10:15,532
Fire! Bang-bang-
bang-bang-bang.
157
00:10:15,574 --> 00:10:18,618
It is like watching
the battle of Waterloo
from a spaceship.
158
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:18,620
It is like watching
the battle of Waterloo
from a spaceship.
(CHUCKLES)
159
00:10:18,620 --> 00:10:20,037
(CHUCKLES)
160
00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:26,626
I know it looks like
the three of us are just
161
00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:29,296
clowning around
in some supercars
162
00:10:29,338 --> 00:10:32,257
on a lovely, lovely day,
on a beautiful bit of road,
163
00:10:32,299 --> 00:10:34,384
but this is important work.
164
00:10:34,426 --> 00:10:37,971
(CHUCKLES) It is.
165
00:10:38,013 --> 00:10:39,556
It is.
166
00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:43,769
And to prove it's
important work,
167
00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:45,812
we decided to pull over
168
00:10:45,854 --> 00:10:49,149
and start acting like
important car journalists.
169
00:10:51,943 --> 00:10:54,946
You may mock the idea
of a Croatian supercar,
170
00:10:54,988 --> 00:11:00,160
but Rimac is already working
with Koenigsegg and Aston
Martin on their battery tech.
171
00:11:00,202 --> 00:11:01,661
It's a serious company.
172
00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:05,999
So serious that they make
nearly every bit of this car
themselves.
173
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:10,379
Satnav, switch gear,
headlamps - all in-house.
174
00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:13,548
Mm, apart from the leather,
if you go for that,
which is Bulgarian.
175
00:11:13,590 --> 00:11:15,842
-I love Bulgarian leather.
-It's my favourite.
176
00:11:15,884 --> 00:11:19,221
But, anyway, the reason
I like the Aventador most
177
00:11:19,262 --> 00:11:22,682
is because it defines
the supercar.
178
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:22,684
is because it defines
the supercar.
It wasn't designed to do a
billion round Brands Hatch.
179
00:11:22,684 --> 00:11:25,685
It wasn't designed to do a
billion round Brands Hatch.
180
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:25,687
It wasn't designed to do a
billion round Brands Hatch.
It was designed to do 9
on Knightsbridge.
181
00:11:25,687 --> 00:11:27,813
It was designed to do 9
on Knightsbridge.
182
00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:30,899
It was designed
to make people go "Wow",
and it does.
183
00:11:30,941 --> 00:11:33,318
If you wanna go fast,
buy a Ferrari.
184
00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:36,696
-Or a Rimac.
-No, that's for shaving
your legs if you're a lady.
185
00:11:36,738 --> 00:11:39,282
I love the Lamborghini as well.
The styling especially,
it's fantastic.
186
00:11:39,324 --> 00:11:42,119
But you know that the sort of
time and thought that
187
00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:45,038
Lamborghini put into that,
Honda put into things that
188
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:47,624
they thought were important,
like making a new type of
189
00:11:47,666 --> 00:11:51,253
steel section for that pillar
so it can be smaller,
so you can see out better.
190
00:11:51,294 --> 00:11:53,380
Ten radiators
to cool the drivetrain
191
00:11:53,422 --> 00:11:57,509
and lots of other stuff that
make modern technology
simple to use.
192
00:11:57,551 --> 00:11:59,219
I just don't like it.
193
00:11:59,261 --> 00:12:02,389
Well, how is that relevant?
I'm talking about it
and I like it.
194
00:12:02,431 --> 00:12:05,100
-So you're wrong.
-I wanted to like it,
but I don't.
195
00:12:05,142 --> 00:12:08,311
-You're redundant.
-I didn't...
I really wanted to like it.
196
00:12:08,353 --> 00:12:10,856
I've been ten years
looking forward to it.
I wanted to like it.
197
00:12:10,897 --> 00:12:12,357
I got in it,
I didn't like it.
198
00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:14,776
-But it doesn't matter
because I do.
-You are wrong.
199
00:12:14,818 --> 00:12:16,361
-I'm not wrong.
-You are.
200
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:19,823
JEREMY:
Eventually, we stopped
arguing and set off...
201
00:12:19,865 --> 00:12:22,784
so we could do more arguing
on the move.
202
00:12:22,826 --> 00:12:25,579
(ENGINES ROARING)
203
00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:28,540
So, James,
Honda's hybrid technology
204
00:12:28,582 --> 00:12:32,210
has served them very well
in Formula One the last
couple of years, hasn't it?
205
00:12:32,252 --> 00:12:35,046
JAMES: Has it? I wouldn't
know and I don't care.
206
00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:37,382
Formula One is irrelevant.
207
00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:40,719
And then there are
actual details
that are wrong with that car.
208
00:12:40,762 --> 00:12:42,596
Yes, go on.
209
00:12:42,637 --> 00:12:46,016
Well, the gearbox
is dim-witted,
the steering's odd,
210
00:12:46,057 --> 00:12:48,768
the sun visor's too flimsy,
the satnav's from a Civic,
211
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:48,770
the sun visor's too flimsy,
the satnav's from a Civic,
and the fuel gauge
isn't straight.
212
00:12:48,770 --> 00:12:51,354
and the fuel gauge
isn't straight.
213
00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:54,566
What do you mean, the
fuel gauge isn't straight?
214
00:12:54,608 --> 00:12:57,152
You look at
the actual needle.
215
00:12:57,194 --> 00:12:59,779
It's not in the centre
of the dial.
216
00:13:01,448 --> 00:13:03,241
-Yes, it is.
-It isn't.
217
00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:05,243
The actual centre point
of the needle
218
00:13:05,285 --> 00:13:08,455
is higher up
than the middle of the dial.
219
00:13:08,497 --> 00:13:11,374
No, it isn't. The problem is,
when you're driving,
220
00:13:11,416 --> 00:13:14,628
your head, which is too big,
is in the wrong place.
221
00:13:14,669 --> 00:13:17,214
JEREMY: Isn't.
It's on top of my shoulders.
-Oh, God.
222
00:13:17,255 --> 00:13:19,007
If you got
a measuring tape out -
223
00:13:19,049 --> 00:13:21,343
and I'm sure you will,
cos you're that sort of man.
224
00:13:21,384 --> 00:13:23,094
I don't need to get
a tape measure out.
225
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:25,931
I have a very good eye
for these things
and I can tell you it is.
226
00:13:25,972 --> 00:13:27,933
Welcome to Radio Old.
227
00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:32,395
I think the problem is the
needle boss is slightly proud
of the centre of the dial -
228
00:13:32,437 --> 00:13:34,272
because your head's in
the wrong place.
229
00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:37,234
Coming up next, we moan
about the price of things
230
00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:39,819
and how young policemen
are these days.
231
00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:39,821
and how young policemen
are these days.
Nyeh.
232
00:13:39,821 --> 00:13:41,279
Nyeh.
233
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:45,825
JAMES: There's nothing wrong
with the fuel gauge. What
a ridiculous thing to say!
234
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:45,827
JAMES: There's nothing wrong
with the fuel gauge. What
a ridiculous thing to say!
JEREMY: It's so good
to be back doing what we do.
235
00:13:45,827 --> 00:13:48,703
JEREMY: It's so good
to be back doing what we do.
236
00:13:48,745 --> 00:13:51,289
Driving round corners
a bit too quickly
237
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:52,999
while shouting and bickering.
238
00:13:57,003 --> 00:14:00,715
JEREMY: Sadly,
however, things took
a turn for the worse
239
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:02,551
when we arrived
at the hotel
240
00:14:02,592 --> 00:14:05,053
that Hammond had booked.
241
00:14:05,095 --> 00:14:07,472
Here we go.
This is our home.
242
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:12,185
This is gonna be great.
243
00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:15,939
What?
244
00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:22,612
(NONCHALANT WHISTLING)
245
00:14:22,654 --> 00:14:24,823
JEREMY: Hammond.
246
00:14:24,866 --> 00:14:27,409
What is
a "wellness retreat"?
247
00:14:27,450 --> 00:14:28,994
One of these.
248
00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:35,125
More specifically, hang on,
it said Swiss natural detox.
What is that?
249
00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:37,961
-It's handy for
where we need to be.
-Can we get a drink here?
250
00:14:38,003 --> 00:14:39,963
No.
251
00:14:40,005 --> 00:14:41,923
-Are you serious?
-Yes.
252
00:14:41,965 --> 00:14:44,509
Do you realise that could
result in your death?
253
00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:45,677
-"Could"?
-Yes.
254
00:14:45,719 --> 00:14:47,304
Sorry, will.
255
00:14:47,345 --> 00:14:49,431
-What are you
thinking of?
-Why?
256
00:14:49,472 --> 00:14:52,392
It's convenient.
It's near many things
I want to be near.
257
00:14:52,434 --> 00:14:54,894
-It's the only hotel?
-Do they do colonic here?
-Yes.
258
00:14:54,936 --> 00:14:57,314
Would you like to know
what colonic feels like?
259
00:14:57,355 --> 00:14:59,983
-The new electric version.
-Do they really
do colonic here?
260
00:15:00,025 --> 00:15:01,985
-You might
feel better for it.
-I won't feel better for it!
261
00:15:02,027 --> 00:15:03,695
You'll thank me for it
in a bit.
262
00:15:03,737 --> 00:15:06,197
Would you like a glass of
water, James, and some kale?
263
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:08,575
Oh, yes, that's what I
always have for supper.
264
00:15:12,495 --> 00:15:16,499
JEREMY: Over dinner that
night, the mood was dark.
265
00:15:16,541 --> 00:15:18,084
(BIRDSONG)
266
00:15:25,884 --> 00:15:28,553
I know people
who eat this stuff.
267
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,013
Do you know
what they're called?
268
00:15:30,055 --> 00:15:31,598
Women.
269
00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:34,893
Think how healthy you'll feel
when we get back.
270
00:15:36,186 --> 00:15:38,104
-How long
are we here for?
-Four days.
271
00:15:38,146 --> 00:15:39,648
Four days?
272
00:15:39,689 --> 00:15:41,399
I've got a lot of things
planned.
273
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,943
-Yeah, but we're gonna
starve to death, Hammond.
-No, you won't.
274
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:43,945
-Yeah, but we're gonna
starve to death, Hammond.
-No, you won't.
Listen, what this is...
is tough love.
275
00:15:43,945 --> 00:15:48,448
Listen, what this is...
is tough love.
276
00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:50,825
Well, not love for you two,
but it's what you need.
277
00:15:50,867 --> 00:15:54,204
It's tougher hate than usual
is what I'm giving you.
278
00:15:54,245 --> 00:15:57,248
I'm taking you in hand
and for both of your sakes,
279
00:15:57,290 --> 00:16:00,168
turning it around,
turning over a new leaf.
280
00:16:00,210 --> 00:16:02,671
I actually think James
is looking better already.
281
00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:04,964
-He's got a healthy glow.
-He isn't looking better.
He's looking angrier.
282
00:16:05,006 --> 00:16:08,635
You're gonna look
a lot worse in a minute,
I can guarantee that.
283
00:16:08,677 --> 00:16:11,179
RICHARD: Look at the view.
Look at that. Look at that.
284
00:16:11,221 --> 00:16:13,223
JEREMY: You can't eat that!
285
00:16:13,264 --> 00:16:15,183
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
286
00:16:15,225 --> 00:16:17,394
Ungrateful sod!
287
00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:20,730
OK, we will pick that up
later on.
288
00:16:20,772 --> 00:16:22,774
Yes. And now it's time for us
289
00:16:22,816 --> 00:16:27,362
to take a stroll down
the smooth sidewalks
of Conversation Street.
290
00:16:27,404 --> 00:16:29,406
(LIVELY JAZZ)
291
00:16:29,447 --> 00:16:31,449
(INSECT BUZZING)
292
00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:35,036
-(CHEERING)
-That was good.
293
00:16:38,456 --> 00:16:41,126
Now, I'd like to begin
Conversation Street
294
00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:45,004
with the world's most
incompetent TV host,
James May,
295
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:45,006
with the world's most
incompetent TV host,
James May,
who filmed
the entire series...
296
00:16:45,006 --> 00:16:47,757
who filmed
the entire series...
297
00:16:47,799 --> 00:16:51,010
and as you saw in that sting,
the sting itself,
298
00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:53,972
and in the montage, and in
Switzerland, looking...
299
00:16:54,015 --> 00:16:57,392
Well, with long hair,
looking like a roadie
for Steppenwolf.
300
00:16:57,434 --> 00:16:59,561
And then he turned up
this morning
301
00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:01,187
looking like
a geography teacher.
302
00:17:01,229 --> 00:17:02,480
(LAUGHTER)
303
00:17:02,522 --> 00:17:05,734
James, have you ever heard of
the concept of continuity?
304
00:17:05,775 --> 00:17:07,485
He had to do it,
had to make a change,
305
00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:09,529
because he had
his identity stolen.
306
00:17:09,571 --> 00:17:11,197
I did, actually.
That is absolutely true.
307
00:17:11,239 --> 00:17:12,782
I did have
my identity stolen.
308
00:17:12,824 --> 00:17:15,034
Somebody got hold of,
you know, personal details,
309
00:17:15,076 --> 00:17:17,162
address and date of birth,
and they've opened, you know,
310
00:17:17,203 --> 00:17:19,372
eight bank accounts
with overdrafts and loans
311
00:17:19,414 --> 00:17:21,040
and all that stuff
that I'd be liable for.
312
00:17:21,082 --> 00:17:23,209
What fascinates me about this
is they had a choice.
313
00:17:23,251 --> 00:17:26,337
They could've been David
Beckham or Brad Pitt.
314
00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:27,714
Yeah, you can look
around the world. Anybody.
315
00:17:27,756 --> 00:17:30,508
I wanna be Barack Obama.
Cool, powerful.
316
00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:32,010
No, wait a minute.
317
00:17:32,053 --> 00:17:35,764
I want to live in Hammersmith
and have a folding bicycle
318
00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:37,724
so that one day,
I can walk out of my house
319
00:17:37,766 --> 00:17:41,770
and say, "Look at me. Behold,
I have become James May."
320
00:17:41,811 --> 00:17:43,021
(LAUGHTER)
321
00:17:43,064 --> 00:17:45,940
"And now I will organise
your paperclips.
Have you got a pie?"
322
00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:48,067
The good thing is, James...
323
00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:48,069
The good thing is, James...
is we can guarantee this will
never happen to you again.
324
00:17:48,069 --> 00:17:51,196
is we can guarantee this will
never happen to you again.
325
00:17:51,237 --> 00:17:52,614
-Can you?
-Yes.
326
00:17:52,655 --> 00:17:55,492
Because we have come up
with a new name for you.
327
00:17:55,533 --> 00:17:57,827
Yeah. You are now...
328
00:17:57,869 --> 00:17:59,370
Dingleberry Handpump.
329
00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:00,830
-(LAUGHTER)
-Right.
330
00:18:00,872 --> 00:18:02,707
That is your name,
your new identity.
331
00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:05,752
Nobody's gonna steal that
cos nobody's gonna go into
a mobile phone shop and say,
332
00:18:05,794 --> 00:18:08,630
"I'd like to set up an
account. My name is
Dingleberry Handpump."
333
00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:10,548
-Yes.
-You're completely safe.
334
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:12,425
It's just that
that's now your name.
335
00:18:12,467 --> 00:18:14,177
-I appreciate that.
-That's OK.
336
00:18:14,219 --> 00:18:16,095
We're moving on
with an apology.
337
00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:16,097
We're moving on
with an apology.
And it's for the lateness of
the arrival of this series.
338
00:18:16,097 --> 00:18:18,640
And it's for the lateness of
the arrival of this series.
339
00:18:18,681 --> 00:18:20,809
The problem is that since
we were last here,
340
00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:24,604
all three of us,
for one reason or another,
have been in hospital.
341
00:18:24,646 --> 00:18:26,815
Uh, Handpump was in for...
342
00:18:26,856 --> 00:18:28,024
(LAUGHTER)
343
00:18:28,066 --> 00:18:29,901
I don't know why he was in.
But he was.
344
00:18:29,943 --> 00:18:33,780
Hammond, well,
we'll see why later.
And then I had pneumonia.
345
00:18:33,822 --> 00:18:36,407
-Um, this pneumonia
of yours.
-Yes.
346
00:18:36,449 --> 00:18:40,286
It's something that people
catch from... going out
without your vest on.
347
00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:42,539
-That's what I was told.
-Yes, my mum used to say,
348
00:18:42,580 --> 00:18:44,874
you'd get it if you went out
with wet hair.
349
00:18:44,916 --> 00:18:48,545
Yeah, that sort of thing.
And yet, you somehow managed
to catch pneumonia...
350
00:18:48,586 --> 00:18:52,090
on the sun-kissed
Mediterranean isle
of Majorca.
351
00:18:52,133 --> 00:18:54,259
-Yes, I did. I did.
-(LAUGHTER)
352
00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:56,928
It's very odd, because he was
out there for five weeks.
353
00:18:56,970 --> 00:18:58,555
He rang us after one,
and he said,
354
00:18:58,596 --> 00:19:01,140
"I can't come home.
I've literally got
pneumonia."
355
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:01,142
"I can't come home.
I've literally got
pneumonia."
-I had.
-And I looked it up.
356
00:19:01,142 --> 00:19:02,851
-I had.
-And I looked it up.
357
00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:05,395
It was 100 degrees
and bone dry.
358
00:19:05,436 --> 00:19:07,605
-And yet you got pneumonia.
-I did catch pneumonia.
359
00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:09,440
After a short while,
if I remember right,
360
00:19:09,482 --> 00:19:11,943
-you managed to
get yourself to Ibiza.
-Yes, I did.
361
00:19:11,985 --> 00:19:14,153
I don't remember
a news headline
in the papers that said,
362
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:14,155
I don't remember
a news headline
in the papers that said,
"Jeremy Clarkson rushed
to Ibiza with pneumonia."
363
00:19:14,155 --> 00:19:17,323
"Jeremy Clarkson rushed
to Ibiza with pneumonia."
364
00:19:17,365 --> 00:19:19,826
No, I know I wasn't rushed.
I went on a friend's boat.
365
00:19:19,868 --> 00:19:22,829
"Sadly, Jeremy Clarkson
has been admitted
to a luxury yacht..."
366
00:19:22,871 --> 00:19:24,581
(LAUGHTER)
367
00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:28,209
-This pneumonia of yours
that you suffered from.
-Yes? Yes.
368
00:19:28,251 --> 00:19:31,004
Was it at its worst in the
morning when you woke up?
369
00:19:31,045 --> 00:19:34,382
And then did it get better
through the day, every day,
370
00:19:34,424 --> 00:19:36,301
towards the evening,
every day?
371
00:19:36,342 --> 00:19:38,636
It was pneumonia,
for crying out loud!
372
00:19:38,678 --> 00:19:40,388
You're mocking the afflicted.
373
00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:44,392
OK, Handpump, why don't you
tell the ladies and gentlemen
why you were in hospital?
374
00:19:44,434 --> 00:19:48,271
No, I don't like
to make a fuss.
Let's talk about cars.
375
00:19:48,313 --> 00:19:49,981
It's nothing to do
with my anus.
376
00:19:50,023 --> 00:19:52,692
Let's just clear that up
in case...
377
00:19:52,734 --> 00:19:54,736
-Um...
-I've got some conversation.
378
00:19:54,777 --> 00:19:57,196
-What?
-Nissan has introduced
379
00:19:57,196 --> 00:19:57,198
-What?
-Nissan has introduced
some special seats
that record your sweat.
380
00:19:57,198 --> 00:20:00,950
some special seats
that record your sweat.
381
00:20:00,992 --> 00:20:02,577
-What?
-I've got a picture of them.
382
00:20:02,619 --> 00:20:04,537
Right, they start blue.
383
00:20:04,579 --> 00:20:07,624
And then they go yellow
where you've been sweating.
384
00:20:07,665 --> 00:20:09,959
Why would you want seats
that do that?
385
00:20:10,001 --> 00:20:12,754
-That's a very,
very good question
-It's the only question.
386
00:20:12,795 --> 00:20:15,632
Yes. I looked into it.
Apparently, they say
it's because
387
00:20:15,673 --> 00:20:17,675
you can tell
when you're dehydrated,
388
00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:19,302
because you've
been sweating.
389
00:20:19,344 --> 00:20:21,095
I know when I'm dehydrated.
390
00:20:21,137 --> 00:20:24,307
It's because I feel thirsty
and I need a glass of wine.
391
00:20:24,349 --> 00:20:26,309
-Yeah.
-(LAUGHTER)
392
00:20:26,351 --> 00:20:30,021
-Well, be careful with that,
you'll get pneumonia again.
-That's how it starts.
393
00:20:30,063 --> 00:20:32,523
That's how it starts.
I know what you mean.
394
00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:34,525
Just don't applaud him.
395
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:36,611
Handpump.
396
00:20:36,653 --> 00:20:38,571
That is the world's first...
397
00:20:38,613 --> 00:20:41,866
Nissan have come up
with the world's first
pneumonia-sensing car seats.
398
00:20:41,908 --> 00:20:43,785
That's absolutely incredible.
399
00:20:43,826 --> 00:20:45,828
I know what you mean.
Our bodies are equipped with
400
00:20:45,870 --> 00:20:48,623
means of telling us
that we are dehydrated
without looking at the seat.
401
00:20:48,665 --> 00:20:51,584
-Exactly. Exactly.
-Like if you start
going for a pee
402
00:20:51,626 --> 00:20:55,046
and just sand comes out,
it's time for some water.
403
00:20:55,088 --> 00:20:58,341
If you're one of those
sort of slightly fat
jogger type people,
404
00:20:58,383 --> 00:21:00,802
won't you end up with
like a yellow line
405
00:21:00,843 --> 00:21:02,679
where your butt crack was?
406
00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:04,847
Oh, how lovely!
How very lovely.
407
00:21:04,889 --> 00:21:06,724
Do you know the worst one
I ever had with that?
408
00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:09,936
I was filming
in the States, in Texas,
town called Lubbock.
409
00:21:09,978 --> 00:21:13,356
And I borrowed a pickup truck
from this quite large
gentleman.
410
00:21:13,398 --> 00:21:15,441
Um, who'd lent it.
We needed it for filming.
411
00:21:15,483 --> 00:21:18,194
Drove it around all day,
took it back to him
in the evening.
412
00:21:18,236 --> 00:21:19,862
He bent over to
pick something up,
413
00:21:19,904 --> 00:21:23,449
and as he did that, he'd got
his shirt not tucked in.
414
00:21:23,491 --> 00:21:27,578
As he bent over, I could see
he'd done his jeans up
under his arse.
415
00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:29,122
-What?
-Well, 'cause
he wasn't a well off man.
416
00:21:29,163 --> 00:21:30,748
He'd obviously bought
a pair of jeans
when he was 14
417
00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:32,583
and didn't fit them any more,
so he just simply...
418
00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:34,877
And I could see he hadn't
wiped his bottom.
419
00:21:34,919 --> 00:21:36,838
Oh, God! Jeremy!
420
00:21:36,879 --> 00:21:39,757
Who steers your eyes?
Why did you look there?
421
00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:42,010
-Because...
-Look away! Look away!
422
00:21:42,051 --> 00:21:44,220
It was a gigantic arse
with a brown...
423
00:21:44,262 --> 00:21:47,056
-I don't want to see
a man's claggy bottom.
-I didn't either.
424
00:21:47,098 --> 00:21:49,142
I especially didn't.
I'd spent all day
425
00:21:49,183 --> 00:21:52,103
squirming around in the seats
of his pickup truck.
426
00:21:52,145 --> 00:21:55,189
And I was wearing... I was
wearing beige trousers.
427
00:21:55,231 --> 00:21:57,108
-(LAUGHTER)
-That's all right.
428
00:21:57,150 --> 00:22:00,028
You could explain it
to people. It's not mine.
It's somebody else's.
429
00:22:00,069 --> 00:22:03,865
Exactly. I've got
somebody else's skid marks
on my trousers.
430
00:22:03,906 --> 00:22:05,366
It doesn't wash.
431
00:22:06,826 --> 00:22:08,327
Now, as we know, a lot of...
432
00:22:08,369 --> 00:22:10,288
particularly sporty cars
these days
433
00:22:10,331 --> 00:22:12,373
have got exhaust systems
that sort of make a racket
434
00:22:12,415 --> 00:22:14,834
when you put your foot down
or when you start them up.
435
00:22:14,876 --> 00:22:16,377
I had an Audi RS3
the other day.
436
00:22:16,419 --> 00:22:19,422
As you fired it up... (ROARS)
437
00:22:19,464 --> 00:22:21,632
-We're only going
to the shops for some milk.
-Makes a big fuss.
438
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:23,593
Makes a huge
song and dance about it.
439
00:22:23,634 --> 00:22:25,678
Actually, some Jags
do this, don't they?
440
00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:27,555
-All the sporty ones do.
-Yeah, they do.
441
00:22:27,597 --> 00:22:30,558
They make a tremendous racket
but you don't hear it
inside the Jag.
442
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:33,686
You can only hear it...
Basically, your neighbours
are annoyed by it but not you.
443
00:22:33,728 --> 00:22:35,855
Yes, and this is exactly
what I'm on about.
444
00:22:35,897 --> 00:22:38,566
Because Ford has announced
on the new Mustang,
445
00:22:38,608 --> 00:22:41,527
it's got something called
"Good Neighbour Mode".
446
00:22:41,569 --> 00:22:44,280
Ooh, does it come around
and water your plants
when you're on holiday?
447
00:22:44,322 --> 00:22:46,407
-Tell you you forgot to
take the cat in?
-No.
448
00:22:46,449 --> 00:22:49,827
-Bring your post in?
-No. It doesn't do
any of those things.
449
00:22:49,869 --> 00:22:52,455
But you can program the car
to start quietly
450
00:22:52,497 --> 00:22:54,290
between certain hours
of the day.
451
00:22:54,332 --> 00:22:57,543
So between, say, 11pm and 8am
it starts quietly.
452
00:22:57,585 --> 00:22:59,545
Ok? Because Ford's
head of noises--
453
00:22:59,587 --> 00:23:01,339
The what?
454
00:23:01,382 --> 00:23:05,009
No, he's American. It'll be
the Vice President of noises,
cos they always are.
455
00:23:05,051 --> 00:23:07,887
He's come up with a list of
other annoying sounds.
456
00:23:07,929 --> 00:23:10,056
Oh, where are you on it?
Come on, top, got to be.
457
00:23:10,098 --> 00:23:12,683
Gotta be. Right at the top.
Number one.
458
00:23:12,725 --> 00:23:14,143
That's actually
a good point.
459
00:23:14,185 --> 00:23:16,854
What are the most annoying
noises in the world?
460
00:23:16,896 --> 00:23:19,065
Oh, good conversation,
I like that.
461
00:23:19,107 --> 00:23:20,441
-What are they?
-Aircraft.
462
00:23:20,483 --> 00:23:22,026
-What?
-Cat fighting.
463
00:23:22,068 --> 00:23:23,528
-Cat fighting.
-I like that.
464
00:23:23,569 --> 00:23:25,279
-Donald Trump.
-(LAUGHTER)
465
00:23:25,321 --> 00:23:26,781
-Foxes shagging.
-What?
466
00:23:26,823 --> 00:23:28,199
-What?
-(LAUGHTER)
467
00:23:28,241 --> 00:23:29,951
Whoa!
468
00:23:29,992 --> 00:23:31,494
So, who was shagging?
469
00:23:31,536 --> 00:23:32,995
-Foxes shagging.
-Foxes--
470
00:23:33,037 --> 00:23:34,622
No, he's right.
That is annoying.
471
00:23:34,664 --> 00:23:36,666
-Foxes make a lot of noise.
-Do you know why?
472
00:23:36,707 --> 00:23:38,626
This is broadcast in America.
473
00:23:38,668 --> 00:23:41,087
They don't know...
(QUIETLY) ...what shagging
is.
474
00:23:41,129 --> 00:23:43,381
We know what shagging is.
475
00:23:43,424 --> 00:23:45,466
-Making love.
-Getting it on.
476
00:23:45,508 --> 00:23:48,970
Making little foxes,
for our American viewers.
477
00:23:49,011 --> 00:23:51,013
I have to be honest. Mine
is an old-fashioned one.
478
00:23:51,055 --> 00:23:53,224
-Polystyrene.
Anyone share that one?
-Yeah.
479
00:23:53,266 --> 00:23:54,934
Polystyrene doesn't make
a noise.
480
00:23:54,976 --> 00:23:56,352
It does, it squeaks.
481
00:23:56,394 --> 00:23:58,729
My children bought me
one of those record players,
482
00:23:58,771 --> 00:24:01,190
to digitise vinyl.
You know the one I mean.
483
00:24:01,232 --> 00:24:03,317
To transfer your records
into digital files.
484
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:06,195
I can't get it out of the box
cos it's covered
in polystyrene.
485
00:24:06,237 --> 00:24:07,405
It's just sitting there.
486
00:24:07,448 --> 00:24:09,157
-So your kids
bought you this?
-Yes.
487
00:24:09,198 --> 00:24:11,284
-And you haven't
taken it out of the box.
-No.
488
00:24:11,325 --> 00:24:12,827
BOTH: You ungrateful bastard.
489
00:24:12,869 --> 00:24:15,454
-(LAUGHTER)
-Did you hear that?
It was like stereo.
490
00:24:15,454 --> 00:24:15,456
-(LAUGHTER)
-Did you hear that?
It was like stereo.
(APPLAUSE)
491
00:24:15,456 --> 00:24:17,165
(APPLAUSE)
492
00:24:17,206 --> 00:24:19,834
I mean, that's your dad.
493
00:24:19,876 --> 00:24:22,461
He wouldn't even
take it out of the box.
494
00:24:22,461 --> 00:24:22,463
He wouldn't even
take it out of the box.
Your secret's out of the box
now, unlike your present
that they bought you.
495
00:24:22,463 --> 00:24:25,882
Your secret's out of the box
now, unlike your present
that they bought you.
496
00:24:25,923 --> 00:24:27,842
That is the end
of Conversation Street.
497
00:24:27,884 --> 00:24:29,385
We must now move on.
498
00:24:29,427 --> 00:24:31,888
In fact, we must move back
to our film.
499
00:24:31,929 --> 00:24:34,599
Tonight we are comparing
the superb
500
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:37,310
Lamborghini Aventador S,
501
00:24:37,351 --> 00:24:40,521
the Honda NSX -
which is a hybrid
and has a wonky fuel gauge--
502
00:24:40,563 --> 00:24:42,231
No, it doesn't.
It's not wonky.
503
00:24:42,273 --> 00:24:45,610
...and the Rimac,
which is an all-electric
Croatian supercar.
504
00:24:45,651 --> 00:24:48,738
It's our comparison
between the past,
the present, and the future.
505
00:24:48,779 --> 00:24:50,573
Yeah, the only trouble
with this
506
00:24:50,615 --> 00:24:52,617
is that we were staying
at a health farm,
507
00:24:52,658 --> 00:24:54,285
which Hammond had chosen,
508
00:24:54,327 --> 00:24:57,371
sticking to a schedule
that he'd dreamt up.
509
00:25:08,841 --> 00:25:11,552
JAMES: Our first outing
was to a museum
510
00:25:11,594 --> 00:25:14,055
in the nearby city
of Lucerne.
511
00:25:17,516 --> 00:25:19,518
But that morning,
Jeremy and I
512
00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:21,896
had other things
on our minds.
513
00:25:21,938 --> 00:25:25,524
I'm starving already.
I think it's cos I only
had air for breakfast.
514
00:25:25,524 --> 00:25:25,526
I'm starving already.
I think it's cos I only
had air for breakfast.
JEREMY: I had
a piece of dry toast.
515
00:25:25,526 --> 00:25:27,902
JEREMY: I had
a piece of dry toast.
516
00:25:27,944 --> 00:25:30,404
RICHARD: Stop bleating
and just enjoy the view.
517
00:25:30,446 --> 00:25:32,198
Look around you.
518
00:25:38,788 --> 00:25:40,665
Ah.
519
00:25:55,846 --> 00:25:57,473
(SIGHS)
520
00:25:58,766 --> 00:26:00,184
Brilliant.
521
00:26:00,226 --> 00:26:03,729
JEREMY: Obviously something's
gone wrong here, hasn't it?
522
00:26:07,566 --> 00:26:09,568
(WHIRRING)
523
00:26:11,362 --> 00:26:12,822
Where's he going?
524
00:26:14,073 --> 00:26:15,658
W...
525
00:26:16,784 --> 00:26:18,327
It's actually shut.
526
00:26:18,369 --> 00:26:20,329
It's roadworks, I think.
527
00:26:20,371 --> 00:26:22,164
We'll have to back up.
528
00:26:22,206 --> 00:26:25,918
So they are prepared to let
you sit here at a red light
until you starve to death.
529
00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:30,548
Why don't they just tell you
it's shut? A bit un-Swiss.
530
00:26:30,591 --> 00:26:33,843
RICHARD: Right, there is
an escape road to the side.
It's the old route, I think.
531
00:26:33,884 --> 00:26:37,179
If we back up until I can see
it, then we'll go down there.
532
00:26:38,723 --> 00:26:40,433
JEREMY:
Once we'd all backed up,
533
00:26:40,474 --> 00:26:43,019
we turned onto
Hammond's back road.
534
00:26:43,060 --> 00:26:45,229
Which was in a gorge.
535
00:26:47,481 --> 00:26:48,774
(SCRAPING)
536
00:26:51,152 --> 00:26:54,196
Yep, this is... Oh, yeah.
537
00:26:54,238 --> 00:26:56,991
Well done, Hammond,
you blithering idiot.
538
00:26:58,367 --> 00:26:59,577
(SCRAPING)
539
00:27:01,078 --> 00:27:02,580
Well, Hammond,
I've got to say
540
00:27:02,623 --> 00:27:05,333
I'm glad Honda spent
so much time and effort
541
00:27:05,374 --> 00:27:06,959
working on
the dynamics of this car
542
00:27:07,001 --> 00:27:11,088
so I could enjoy this
supercar extravaganza
you've brought me on.
543
00:27:11,130 --> 00:27:14,008
You have excelled yourself
in ruining my day.
544
00:27:14,050 --> 00:27:15,509
Oh, good.
545
00:27:15,551 --> 00:27:18,471
You've brought us
to a builder's yard, Hammond.
546
00:27:18,512 --> 00:27:20,139
There are lavatories
on the left
547
00:27:20,181 --> 00:27:23,726
if anybody wishes
to use them.
548
00:27:23,768 --> 00:27:27,688
JEREMY: Why?
Why did we allow him
to bring us to Switzerland?
549
00:27:27,730 --> 00:27:30,608
Why did we allow him
to put himself in charge?
550
00:27:32,651 --> 00:27:34,445
There we go.
551
00:27:34,487 --> 00:27:37,656
Back on the main road.
552
00:27:37,656 --> 00:27:37,658
Back on the main road.
JEREMY:
Unless, that is, you're me...
553
00:27:37,658 --> 00:27:39,867
JEREMY:
Unless, that is, you're me...
554
00:27:39,909 --> 00:27:41,535
in a Lamborghini.
555
00:27:41,577 --> 00:27:43,662
-Oh... Argh.
-(SCRAPING)
556
00:27:43,662 --> 00:27:43,664
-Oh... Argh.
-(SCRAPING)
(SCRAPING)
557
00:27:43,664 --> 00:27:45,873
(SCRAPING)
558
00:27:50,586 --> 00:27:52,046
-(SCRAPING)
-Ugh!
559
00:27:52,088 --> 00:27:54,423
Hammond! Hammond!
560
00:27:54,465 --> 00:27:56,467
Where are you?
I'm going to kill you!
561
00:27:59,220 --> 00:28:01,680
This thing is
deeply impressive.
562
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:01,682
This thing is
deeply impressive.
James, I've dialled up
my regenerative braking
with the throttle,
563
00:28:01,682 --> 00:28:05,142
James, I've dialled up
my regenerative braking
with the throttle,
564
00:28:05,184 --> 00:28:06,894
so that I lift off
the accelerator,
565
00:28:06,936 --> 00:28:09,522
I don't even have to
touch the brake to stop.
566
00:28:09,563 --> 00:28:12,316
Wow. Can't stand
his resolute chirpiness
567
00:28:12,358 --> 00:28:16,695
in the face of obvious
disaster of his making.
568
00:28:16,695 --> 00:28:16,697
in the face of obvious
disaster of his making.
JEREMY: I, meanwhile,
had extricated myself
569
00:28:16,697 --> 00:28:19,657
JEREMY: I, meanwhile,
had extricated myself
570
00:28:19,700 --> 00:28:23,577
from Hammond's gorge and was
now causing traffic chaos...
571
00:28:23,619 --> 00:28:25,287
-(HORN TOOTS)
-Sorry.
572
00:28:25,329 --> 00:28:26,789
Shit.
573
00:28:26,831 --> 00:28:30,251
...by having to do
a three-point turn.
574
00:28:30,292 --> 00:28:33,671
-(HORN BLARES)
-Sorry.
575
00:28:37,591 --> 00:28:41,262
-(HORN TOOTS)
-Sorry. I do apologise.
576
00:28:41,303 --> 00:28:44,390
JEREMY: Having not enjoyed
our supercars all morning,
577
00:28:44,432 --> 00:28:46,517
we soon arrived in Lucerne,
578
00:28:46,559 --> 00:28:49,728
with our irritating
tour guide leading the way.
579
00:28:52,231 --> 00:28:54,150
RICHARD: Hey, chaps,
they're electric trams.
580
00:28:54,191 --> 00:28:57,945
If I had a long enough
aerial, could I connect to
the wires and power this?
581
00:28:57,987 --> 00:28:59,864
JEREMY: Why don't you just
reach out and hold onto them?
582
00:28:59,905 --> 00:29:04,243
You would conduct the
electricity, wouldn't you?
583
00:29:04,285 --> 00:29:08,539
JEREMY: Hammond then said
that the best way
of getting to the museum
584
00:29:08,581 --> 00:29:12,710
was by driving right through
the medieval heart
of the city.
585
00:29:14,336 --> 00:29:18,048
Wasn't there a ring road
we could've used?
586
00:29:18,090 --> 00:29:20,509
Oh, ring roads are boring.
And further.
587
00:29:20,551 --> 00:29:23,429
JEREMY: I'm really getting
the best out of this car here
588
00:29:23,471 --> 00:29:27,475
in this town that Hammond's
bringing us through.
589
00:29:27,516 --> 00:29:29,643
JAMES: Hammond,
this is a cobbled street.
590
00:29:29,685 --> 00:29:32,188
I'm in a supercar
on a cobbled street.
591
00:29:32,229 --> 00:29:34,440
Well, it's a road.
It's a beautiful road
592
00:29:34,482 --> 00:29:36,692
through this ancient
and wonderful city.
593
00:29:36,734 --> 00:29:39,069
I didn't wanna look at an
ancient and wonderful city.
594
00:29:39,111 --> 00:29:41,822
I'd do that on a bicycle,
you pillock.
595
00:29:41,864 --> 00:29:45,784
JAMES: Then,
things got worse.
596
00:29:45,826 --> 00:29:48,078
RICHARD:
Uh, chaps, it's right here.
597
00:29:48,120 --> 00:29:50,791
JEREMY: You sure?
-Oh, this does look a bit...
598
00:29:53,751 --> 00:29:55,878
Yeah, we'll be all right.
599
00:29:58,964 --> 00:30:00,758
Oh, I don't like this.
600
00:30:00,801 --> 00:30:04,845
"Come to Switzerland
and drive the new NSX,"
said Hammond.
601
00:30:04,887 --> 00:30:08,057
This Lamborghini's four
inches wider than that Honda
602
00:30:08,098 --> 00:30:12,520
and five inches wider
than the lady shaver.
603
00:30:12,561 --> 00:30:16,649
I am never ever ever going to
get round that corner.
604
00:30:17,816 --> 00:30:19,985
JEREMY: And sure enough...
605
00:30:28,202 --> 00:30:30,829
A tiny bit of left hand
and just creep forward
so I can see.
606
00:30:30,871 --> 00:30:33,999
You can't creep.
It's a single clutch gearbox.
607
00:30:34,041 --> 00:30:36,710
Instead of giving this model
40 more horsepower,
608
00:30:36,752 --> 00:30:38,963
I'd have given it
a "one more clutch".
609
00:30:39,004 --> 00:30:41,340
No, I'd agree.
Does that fold?
610
00:30:41,382 --> 00:30:43,300
It doesn't matter.
Even if it does,
611
00:30:43,342 --> 00:30:45,511
the back of the car
is wider than the front.
612
00:30:45,553 --> 00:30:47,555
I'm going to have to find
another...
613
00:30:47,596 --> 00:30:49,807
It physically won't fit
through there.
614
00:30:49,850 --> 00:30:55,187
All right, well,
we're up there.
See you in a couple of weeks.
615
00:30:55,229 --> 00:30:59,483
JEREMY: So, while James
went off to not enjoy
his NSX some more...
616
00:30:59,525 --> 00:31:02,945
JAMES: Have you got any idea
what you're doing
and where you're going?
617
00:31:02,987 --> 00:31:05,573
RICHARD: It's down here,
this pretty little alley
here.
618
00:31:05,614 --> 00:31:07,074
...I spent a couple of hours
619
00:31:07,116 --> 00:31:09,868
on the verge of
a massive coronary.
620
00:31:11,662 --> 00:31:13,289
Jesus H.
621
00:31:17,501 --> 00:31:19,503
God, give me strength.
622
00:31:19,545 --> 00:31:21,297
Hammond!
623
00:31:24,425 --> 00:31:25,926
Sorry.
624
00:31:26,969 --> 00:31:28,137
Sorry.
625
00:31:29,221 --> 00:31:30,806
Sorry.
626
00:31:32,349 --> 00:31:34,351
JAMES: Meanwhile...
627
00:31:34,393 --> 00:31:36,895
Or do you have a bread roll?
I'm starving.
628
00:31:36,937 --> 00:31:39,023
-I need to eat. Eat.
-Ah.
629
00:31:39,064 --> 00:31:41,317
I'm so hungry. Yes.
630
00:31:41,358 --> 00:31:43,986
Danke. Danke, danke, danke.
631
00:31:44,028 --> 00:31:45,821
Oh.
632
00:31:45,863 --> 00:31:47,573
Mm-mm. What are these?
633
00:31:47,615 --> 00:31:49,908
It's bloody Ryvita.
634
00:31:49,950 --> 00:31:52,286
JEREMY: Eventually,
while I was attempting
635
00:31:52,328 --> 00:31:54,872
yet another
impossible manoeuvre,
636
00:31:54,915 --> 00:31:57,041
Hammond and May arrived.
637
00:31:57,082 --> 00:31:59,168
Well...
638
00:31:59,209 --> 00:32:02,254
-(CLATTERING)
-Oh, no.
639
00:32:02,296 --> 00:32:05,549
That's not good. Sorry.
640
00:32:05,591 --> 00:32:08,469
And then after a short drive
through suburbia,
641
00:32:08,510 --> 00:32:10,763
where none of us
got past 40,
642
00:32:10,804 --> 00:32:12,973
we arrived at
our destination.
643
00:32:14,016 --> 00:32:16,769
It was a transport museum.
644
00:32:16,810 --> 00:32:18,854
And once Hammond
had plugged his lady shaver
645
00:32:18,896 --> 00:32:21,899
into one of Switzerland's
fast charging points...
646
00:32:23,984 --> 00:32:28,572
...we went inside
to look at the rather
underwhelming exhibits.
647
00:32:32,534 --> 00:32:34,620
So let me just see
if I've got this straight.
648
00:32:34,662 --> 00:32:36,914
You made me - well, us -
649
00:32:36,957 --> 00:32:39,958
drive through a gorge
and the 12th century,
650
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:42,294
so we can look at
a Renault 16?
651
00:32:42,336 --> 00:32:44,213
No, no, this is
so much more than that.
652
00:32:44,254 --> 00:32:47,257
There's all the things
on the racks here, and
then there's pictures here.
653
00:32:47,299 --> 00:32:49,802
You look for the picture
of the thing that you
wanna look at.
654
00:32:49,843 --> 00:32:51,345
Then you touch it.
655
00:32:51,387 --> 00:32:53,347
And now look
what happens.
656
00:32:53,389 --> 00:32:56,225
(WHIRRING)
657
00:32:58,477 --> 00:32:59,980
It's presented to you!
658
00:33:03,732 --> 00:33:05,567
JEREMY: I can only
apologise for this.
659
00:33:05,609 --> 00:33:08,570
I know you want to see
which of our three cars
is the fastest,
660
00:33:08,612 --> 00:33:11,490
which handles the best,
which is the most economical.
661
00:33:11,532 --> 00:33:14,159
JAMES: Oh, my God,
it's coming towards us.
662
00:33:14,201 --> 00:33:15,452
RICHARD: Yeah.
663
00:33:15,494 --> 00:33:17,579
What we're actually
looking at instead
664
00:33:17,621 --> 00:33:19,957
is a vending machine.
665
00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:22,292
With some old motorcycles on.
666
00:33:22,334 --> 00:33:25,087
-Oh, look, come on.
-Oh, wow, it goes
round and round.
667
00:33:25,129 --> 00:33:27,005
That is just the best.
668
00:33:28,507 --> 00:33:30,509
Give me strength.
669
00:33:30,551 --> 00:33:34,096
(WHIRRING)
670
00:33:34,138 --> 00:33:38,392
JEREMY: That night,
over dinner, the mood
was even darker.
671
00:33:40,144 --> 00:33:42,146
(BIRDSONG)
672
00:33:48,485 --> 00:33:51,321
And the following day,
it didn't improve
673
00:33:51,363 --> 00:33:55,033
because Hammond made us
go on exactly the same route
674
00:33:55,033 --> 00:33:55,035
because Hammond made us
go on exactly the same route
as he had the day before.
675
00:33:55,035 --> 00:33:56,535
as he had the day before.
676
00:33:56,577 --> 00:33:58,328
We did this yesterday.
677
00:34:01,498 --> 00:34:04,585
We did this as well
yesterday.
678
00:34:04,626 --> 00:34:06,920
And after Hammond
had plugged his car into
679
00:34:06,962 --> 00:34:09,256
the same charging point...
680
00:34:09,298 --> 00:34:13,719
we went off
to look at that day's
underwhelming attraction.
681
00:34:13,761 --> 00:34:16,180
The Museum of Chess.
682
00:34:20,142 --> 00:34:22,394
(TAPPING)
683
00:34:23,437 --> 00:34:25,898
Boom! I win!
684
00:34:25,939 --> 00:34:27,649
He doesn't even know
how to play, does he?
685
00:34:27,691 --> 00:34:30,110
And then the penny dropped.
686
00:34:30,152 --> 00:34:31,653
-Hammond.
-What?
687
00:34:31,695 --> 00:34:33,197
What are we doing tomorrow?
688
00:34:33,238 --> 00:34:35,532
Going to a pencil museum.
689
00:34:35,574 --> 00:34:39,620
Is the pencil museum in
the same town as this museum?
690
00:34:39,661 --> 00:34:40,788
Yes.
691
00:34:40,829 --> 00:34:43,123
Do you keep
bringing us to this town
692
00:34:43,165 --> 00:34:47,920
because it's the only one
within 100 miles of
our wellness centre
693
00:34:47,961 --> 00:34:51,840
where there is a fast
charging point for your car?
694
00:34:54,384 --> 00:34:56,929
Yes.
695
00:34:56,970 --> 00:35:00,057
JEREMY: So that night,
after another plate of weeds,
696
00:35:00,100 --> 00:35:03,101
James and I sacked Hammond
as team leader
697
00:35:03,143 --> 00:35:05,646
and came up with
our own schedule.
698
00:35:13,612 --> 00:35:15,614
(ENGINE PURRS)
699
00:35:21,370 --> 00:35:23,038
Right, we've found
an airfield,
700
00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:25,249
and now we're gonna have
a drag race,
701
00:35:25,290 --> 00:35:28,961
which is
a lot more interesting
than going to a museum.
702
00:35:30,462 --> 00:35:32,923
I'd have thought
he'd like museums.
703
00:35:32,965 --> 00:35:34,424
I mean, he's driving one.
704
00:35:34,466 --> 00:35:37,177
(ENGINES GROWLING)
705
00:35:38,470 --> 00:35:41,723
Track, check, traction, yes.
706
00:35:41,765 --> 00:35:43,809
RICHARD:
I've put it in launch,
707
00:35:43,851 --> 00:35:47,396
which sets the rear
two engines in the first
of their two gears.
708
00:35:47,437 --> 00:35:49,523
The front two engines
only have one gear.
709
00:35:49,565 --> 00:35:51,316
I do not know how that works.
710
00:35:51,358 --> 00:35:54,736
Why doesn't the car stretch
or overtake itself?
711
00:35:56,530 --> 00:35:58,282
The simple fact of
the matter is that
712
00:35:58,323 --> 00:36:01,326
because this car has
no electrical gubbins,
713
00:36:01,368 --> 00:36:05,789
it is, despite appearances,
the lightest car here.
714
00:36:05,831 --> 00:36:09,001
And it has 730 horsepower.
715
00:36:09,042 --> 00:36:10,836
So allow me, please,
to demonstrate
716
00:36:10,878 --> 00:36:14,214
that you can't beat
old-time rock and roll.
717
00:36:14,256 --> 00:36:16,633
(ENGINE ROARING)
718
00:36:18,010 --> 00:36:19,887
(ENGINE GROWLING)
719
00:36:22,180 --> 00:36:24,349
(WHIRRING)
720
00:36:25,976 --> 00:36:28,812
(ENGINES REVVING)
721
00:36:28,854 --> 00:36:30,606
Thrust mode!
722
00:36:33,692 --> 00:36:36,653
(ENGINES ROARING)
723
00:36:36,695 --> 00:36:38,198
Oh, my word!
724
00:36:39,323 --> 00:36:42,117
God, look at Hammond!
725
00:36:42,159 --> 00:36:44,870
190, 200, 220, 200...
726
00:36:44,912 --> 00:36:48,415
I can't speak fast enough!
727
00:36:48,457 --> 00:36:52,502
JEREMY: James and I
were now racing
only to see who'd be last.
728
00:36:52,544 --> 00:36:56,048
Yes, come on, come on,
come on, come on!
729
00:36:56,089 --> 00:36:59,176
-(GROANING)
-Goodbye, Mr May.
730
00:36:59,219 --> 00:37:01,553
(REVVING)
731
00:37:09,229 --> 00:37:12,232
Jes-us!
732
00:37:14,316 --> 00:37:17,402
That Rimac just (BLEEP)s off.
733
00:37:17,444 --> 00:37:20,155
Ha-ha ha-ha!
734
00:37:20,197 --> 00:37:22,991
If that is the future,
I am so ready!
735
00:37:23,033 --> 00:37:25,869
Oh! Oh-ho!
736
00:37:25,911 --> 00:37:27,913
I've never seen
anything like that.
737
00:37:27,955 --> 00:37:32,709
I've never seen anything move
as quickly as that.
738
00:37:32,751 --> 00:37:35,170
Not with number plates.
739
00:37:35,212 --> 00:37:38,674
JEREMY: Annoyed that my
dinosaur had been humiliated,
740
00:37:38,715 --> 00:37:40,258
I decided to show Hammond
741
00:37:40,258 --> 00:37:40,260
I decided to show Hammond
that it still has
enough power
742
00:37:40,260 --> 00:37:42,219
that it still has
enough power
743
00:37:42,262 --> 00:37:45,263
to kick-start a dying star.
744
00:37:45,263 --> 00:37:45,265
to kick-start a dying star.
(TYRES SCREECHING)
745
00:37:45,265 --> 00:37:47,265
(TYRES SCREECHING)
746
00:37:47,265 --> 00:37:47,267
(TYRES SCREECHING)
Yes!
747
00:37:47,267 --> 00:37:48,475
Yes!
748
00:37:56,066 --> 00:37:58,110
This is what Lamborghinis
are all about.
749
00:37:58,151 --> 00:37:59,611
Oh, yeah.
750
00:38:00,737 --> 00:38:02,280
Which went well.
751
00:38:02,322 --> 00:38:04,408
(TYRES SCREECHING)
752
00:38:07,202 --> 00:38:09,204
-Oh, my word!
-Oh!
753
00:38:09,246 --> 00:38:13,750
Sit rep. The entire tyre
has been consumed
754
00:38:13,792 --> 00:38:15,877
-by the heart of the monster.
-It has.
755
00:38:15,919 --> 00:38:17,629
Do you know, the thing was,
756
00:38:17,671 --> 00:38:20,549
the tyre pressure
warning light came on.
757
00:38:20,590 --> 00:38:23,343
-What could that have meant?
-Well, it meant that,
on this,
758
00:38:23,385 --> 00:38:26,555
it was specifically
telling me there was
a problem with this tyre.
759
00:38:26,596 --> 00:38:28,598
-So I ignored it.
-Yes.
760
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:30,726
-Good job you're not
an airline pilot.
-Yes.
761
00:38:30,767 --> 00:38:34,980
However,
we'll get it fixed...
762
00:38:35,022 --> 00:38:38,275
...and then... Actually,
we ought to find a track.
763
00:38:38,318 --> 00:38:40,027
And then I'll be able
to thrash you.
764
00:38:40,068 --> 00:38:41,236
-Oh, mate, no.
-No?
765
00:38:41,278 --> 00:38:45,032
You won't find a track
in Switzerland, will you,
cos motor racing is banned.
766
00:38:45,073 --> 00:38:46,908
-What do you mean banned?
-Oh, it is.
767
00:38:46,950 --> 00:38:51,663
1955 there was an accident
in France, at Le Mans.
768
00:38:51,705 --> 00:38:54,958
The Swiss banned motorsport.
It's still banned today.
769
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:58,503
We can think of
something else. Something
that requires four tyres.
770
00:38:58,545 --> 00:39:01,673
Oh, God, I tell you what,
though, it does mean
another night in his hotel.
771
00:39:01,715 --> 00:39:03,633
You're gonna drive there
on a space saver.
772
00:39:03,675 --> 00:39:05,510
No, I know something
we can do.
773
00:39:05,552 --> 00:39:06,678
What?
774
00:39:06,720 --> 00:39:09,306
There's plenty to occupy us
at the hotel.
775
00:39:09,349 --> 00:39:11,016
-Come on.
-Well, not supper.
776
00:39:11,058 --> 00:39:13,727
I may take a while
because I'll be going
on a bicycle wheel.
777
00:39:13,769 --> 00:39:15,979
(CHEERING)
778
00:39:18,690 --> 00:39:21,276
I still can't believe...
779
00:39:21,318 --> 00:39:24,237
I still can't believe
that Switzerland
780
00:39:24,279 --> 00:39:28,200
banned motor racing
because of an accident
in another country.
781
00:39:28,241 --> 00:39:30,410
Yeah, it's like Britain
banning railways
782
00:39:30,452 --> 00:39:32,913
because a train crashed
in India.
783
00:39:32,954 --> 00:39:36,041
Yeah, exactly. Or it's like
America invading Iraq
784
00:39:36,083 --> 00:39:39,669
because some
Saudi Arabians destroyed
the World Trade Center.
785
00:39:39,711 --> 00:39:41,671
(LAUGHTER AND GROANING)
786
00:39:41,713 --> 00:39:43,632
-Whoa.
-Did I say that out loud?
787
00:39:43,673 --> 00:39:46,259
That came out.
That came out as sound.
788
00:39:46,301 --> 00:39:48,345
Well, never mind,
we can edit it out.
789
00:39:48,388 --> 00:39:50,388
Look, um, we'll pick
that film up later on,
790
00:39:50,388 --> 00:39:50,390
Look, um, we'll pick
that film up later on,
but in the meantime
you may remember that
in the last series
791
00:39:50,390 --> 00:39:52,849
but in the meantime
you may remember that
in the last series
792
00:39:52,891 --> 00:39:56,103
we had a feature
called Celebrity Brain Crash.
793
00:39:56,144 --> 00:39:57,979
Yes, but we're not
doing that any more
794
00:39:58,021 --> 00:39:59,689
because too many people died.
795
00:39:59,731 --> 00:40:03,235
Yeah, and also because
you all hated it.
796
00:40:03,276 --> 00:40:05,278
-(LAUGHTER)
-Yeah, that's the main reason.
797
00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:07,614
Everybody wrote to us
and said, "That's rubbish.
Stop doing it."
798
00:40:07,656 --> 00:40:08,990
Anyway, it doesn't matter,
799
00:40:09,032 --> 00:40:11,118
because we've come up with
another idea,
800
00:40:11,159 --> 00:40:13,995
a brand-new idea
and it is brilliant.
801
00:40:14,037 --> 00:40:17,791
You see, the main
reason why we like
having the tent here--
802
00:40:17,833 --> 00:40:19,543
Is that you can walk home
every week.
803
00:40:19,584 --> 00:40:21,128
Yes, it's just that right
down the road,
804
00:40:21,169 --> 00:40:24,172
and I mean less than
a mile away,
there is an actual track.
805
00:40:24,214 --> 00:40:27,050
Yes, there is, and we've got
a picture of it here.
Have a look.
806
00:40:27,092 --> 00:40:31,513
It's rather fabulous because
as you can see, it's really
quite narrow, all of it,
807
00:40:31,555 --> 00:40:34,182
and then bits of it aren't
finished - this stretch.
808
00:40:34,224 --> 00:40:35,892
Yeah, that bit
is entirely gravel.
809
00:40:35,934 --> 00:40:38,812
Yes, it is,
but it doesn't matter
because it is a circuit.
810
00:40:38,854 --> 00:40:41,606
And then somebody said to us,
"Well, why don't you
get a celebrity
811
00:40:41,648 --> 00:40:44,651
to drive round it every week
to see which is the fastest."
812
00:40:44,693 --> 00:40:46,528
(LAUGHTER)
813
00:40:46,570 --> 00:40:49,447
-We said no,
because that would be boring.
-Yeah.
814
00:40:49,447 --> 00:40:49,449
-We said no,
because that would be boring.
-Yeah.
So we have come up with
an entirely new idea.
815
00:40:49,449 --> 00:40:53,451
So we have come up with
an entirely new idea.
816
00:40:53,451 --> 00:40:53,453
So we have come up with
an entirely new idea.
You see, everybody's always
wanting to know
817
00:40:53,453 --> 00:40:55,537
You see, everybody's always
wanting to know
818
00:40:55,579 --> 00:40:58,415
who is the fastest
weathergirl
in the world,
819
00:40:58,458 --> 00:41:02,752
or who is
the world's fastest
transgender architect.
820
00:41:02,794 --> 00:41:04,421
-Exactly.
-(LAUGHTER)
821
00:41:04,464 --> 00:41:06,131
Let me explain
what we're gonna do.
822
00:41:06,173 --> 00:41:09,467
Each week, two celebrities
from the same field
823
00:41:09,467 --> 00:41:09,469
Each week, two celebrities
from the same field
will go head to head,
on our track,
in a Jaguar F Type.
824
00:41:09,469 --> 00:41:13,763
will go head to head,
on our track,
in a Jaguar F Type.
825
00:41:13,805 --> 00:41:18,018
OK? It's a feature we're
calling Celebrity Face Off.
826
00:41:18,059 --> 00:41:21,396
Or, for short,
Celebrity F Off--
No, that doesn't work.
827
00:41:30,447 --> 00:41:33,241
(CHEERING)
828
00:41:33,283 --> 00:41:38,038
Tonight we are asking
the question that everybody
wants answering.
829
00:41:38,079 --> 00:41:41,958
Who is the fastest
former talent show judge?
830
00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:44,211
And it's an
international competition,
831
00:41:44,252 --> 00:41:48,506
between America's Got Talent
and The Voice UK.
832
00:41:48,548 --> 00:41:51,593
Please welcome Ricky Wilson
and David Hasselhoff!
833
00:41:51,635 --> 00:41:53,637
(CHEERING)
834
00:41:58,850 --> 00:42:00,727
Thank you, man. Welcome.
835
00:42:00,769 --> 00:42:02,479
-Big man's still got it.
-Welcome.
836
00:42:02,522 --> 00:42:04,648
-Thank you.
-Equally, big guy.
837
00:42:04,689 --> 00:42:06,483
-Have a seat.
-Whoo!
838
00:42:07,527 --> 00:42:08,693
Ah.
839
00:42:08,735 --> 00:42:11,863
There you go. All right.
840
00:42:11,905 --> 00:42:14,741
-Hello.
-Hello and welcome.
841
00:42:14,783 --> 00:42:16,618
-Thank you.
-They've made it alive.
842
00:42:16,660 --> 00:42:18,370
(CHEERING)
843
00:42:18,411 --> 00:42:20,914
-No unconvincing deaths.
-(LAUGHTER)
844
00:42:20,956 --> 00:42:22,874
And, of course,
you're not just
845
00:42:22,916 --> 00:42:25,043
former talent show judges.
846
00:42:25,085 --> 00:42:27,170
You both have, obviously,
singing careers.
847
00:42:27,212 --> 00:42:29,381
Albeit with
rather different approaches.
848
00:42:29,422 --> 00:42:32,300
-Um...
-(DAVID CHUCKLES)
849
00:42:32,342 --> 00:42:34,511
Let's have a look at
a photograph of the Hoff.
850
00:42:34,554 --> 00:42:37,055
-There you go, you see.
-(LAUGHTER AND CHEERING)
851
00:42:37,097 --> 00:42:39,474
(WOLF WHISTLING)
852
00:42:39,516 --> 00:42:42,894
That says it all.
853
00:42:42,936 --> 00:42:45,772
The mullet, the dry ice,
the Lamborghini.
854
00:42:45,814 --> 00:42:47,899
-We think that's
the American way.
-Mm-hm.
855
00:42:47,941 --> 00:42:49,943
Now let's have a look at
the Yorkshire way.
856
00:42:49,985 --> 00:42:51,903
-There he is.
-(RICKY LAUGHS)
857
00:42:51,945 --> 00:42:54,823
-(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
-The windswept...
858
00:42:57,534 --> 00:43:00,829
We are making it Yorkshire
versus the United States
of America tonight.
859
00:43:00,870 --> 00:43:03,039
-That's what we decided to do.
-York-shire.
860
00:43:03,081 --> 00:43:06,751
-Have you been to Yorkshire?
-I've... I've... I've had
York-shire pudding.
861
00:43:06,793 --> 00:43:08,211
(LAUGHTER)
862
00:43:08,253 --> 00:43:10,797
Actually, we filmed an
episode of Hoff The Record,
863
00:43:10,839 --> 00:43:12,841
which is a series,
in Yorkshire,
864
00:43:12,882 --> 00:43:14,384
and we had a blast.
865
00:43:14,426 --> 00:43:16,052
The people were
extremely nice.
866
00:43:16,094 --> 00:43:18,638
-I couldn't understand
a word they said.
-(LAUGHTER)
867
00:43:18,680 --> 00:43:21,516
No, it's a special language,
but we're both
from Yorkshire.
868
00:43:21,558 --> 00:43:25,228
Yorkshire will be watching.
Yorkshire versus America.
Well, we've won that.
869
00:43:25,270 --> 00:43:26,396
(LAUGHTER)
870
00:43:26,438 --> 00:43:27,981
Oh, don't pile on
the pressure.
871
00:43:28,023 --> 00:43:31,401
Can I just ask, what did you
think of our track?
872
00:43:31,443 --> 00:43:33,028
It's incredible. I mean...
873
00:43:33,069 --> 00:43:35,613
Hopefully, you know,
when you film people...
874
00:43:35,613 --> 00:43:35,615
Hopefully, you know,
when you film people...
like I've filmed friends
going round tracks
875
00:43:35,615 --> 00:43:37,657
like I've filmed friends
going round tracks
876
00:43:37,699 --> 00:43:39,284
and they go,
"Oh, film me, film me!"
877
00:43:39,326 --> 00:43:42,704
You don't wanna watch it back
cos they come round
the corner like brrrrrrrr.
878
00:43:42,746 --> 00:43:45,373
But we were going sideways
at points on this.
879
00:43:45,415 --> 00:43:47,709
-What about the car? The Jag.
-Loved it.
880
00:43:47,751 --> 00:43:50,795
-I loved it, Jaguar.
-(LAUGHTER)
881
00:43:50,837 --> 00:43:52,881
There's a man
who understands sponsorship.
882
00:43:52,922 --> 00:43:54,382
Yeah, exactly.
883
00:43:54,424 --> 00:43:55,633
I would have thought
your biggest problem
884
00:43:55,633 --> 00:43:55,635
I would have thought
your biggest problem
was getting in it,
cos I really struggle.
885
00:43:55,635 --> 00:43:57,677
was getting in it,
cos I really struggle.
886
00:43:57,719 --> 00:44:00,472
-I couldn't get in the car,
Jeremy.
-Could you not?
887
00:44:00,513 --> 00:44:03,808
No, I had a hard time
getting into KITT,
but you know, this was...
888
00:44:03,850 --> 00:44:05,894
Actually,
we've got some footage.
889
00:44:05,935 --> 00:44:08,980
Anyone wanna see footage
of the Hoff trying to get
into our Jag?
890
00:44:09,022 --> 00:44:11,691
AUDIENCE: Yeah!
-Let's have
a quick look at that.
891
00:44:11,733 --> 00:44:13,610
There it is.
Look. Resplendent.
892
00:44:13,653 --> 00:44:15,445
And it's got
a roll cage in it.
893
00:44:18,281 --> 00:44:20,116
-And this is the bit--
-Oh, my God.
894
00:44:20,158 --> 00:44:23,036
The bit I like here is -
I've had to do this as well -
895
00:44:23,078 --> 00:44:25,497
is when you have to lift your
own leg.
896
00:44:25,538 --> 00:44:28,124
-Argh! Argh!
-(LAUGHTER)
897
00:44:28,166 --> 00:44:32,337
I found it perfectly my size,
Jaguar Land Rover.
898
00:44:32,379 --> 00:44:33,838
(LAUGHTER)
899
00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:37,467
-And even like the colour.
-Yeah, yeah.
900
00:44:37,509 --> 00:44:41,846
Your biggest problem,
though, as I understand it,
with cars,
901
00:44:41,888 --> 00:44:43,306
is being run over by them.
902
00:44:43,348 --> 00:44:46,893
Oh, yeah, cos I actually
got run over, then tried
to chase after the car.
903
00:44:46,935 --> 00:44:49,604
-You never caught the guy?
-They never caught the guy.
904
00:44:49,646 --> 00:44:52,649
How come they can
catch me doing 35 in a 30,
but they can't catch...
905
00:44:52,692 --> 00:44:54,651
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
906
00:44:54,694 --> 00:44:56,444
It's a very good point.
907
00:44:56,486 --> 00:45:00,365
Um, in fact, when er...
908
00:45:00,407 --> 00:45:03,576
In fact, when the police
questioned me about it,
909
00:45:03,618 --> 00:45:07,872
"So, what was the car like?"
and I said it was a Metro
and it had a sunroof.
910
00:45:07,914 --> 00:45:12,168
They said, "How do you know
it had a sunroof?" "Cos
I went over the sunroof."
911
00:45:12,210 --> 00:45:14,045
Good observation while
you're being run over.
912
00:45:14,087 --> 00:45:16,714
"And it's a Tudor Webasto
sunroof."
913
00:45:16,756 --> 00:45:18,633
I'm actually surprised,
though,
914
00:45:18,675 --> 00:45:21,219
you did survive
your motoring youth, Hoff.
915
00:45:21,261 --> 00:45:23,388
Yeah, my first car was um...
916
00:45:23,430 --> 00:45:25,598
when I was just turning 16,
917
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:28,643
was a Corvair,
which is a real small car.
918
00:45:28,685 --> 00:45:30,687
Well, not by
European standards.
919
00:45:30,730 --> 00:45:33,106
-We call it an enormous car.
-Yeah.
920
00:45:33,148 --> 00:45:37,026
The engine was in the back
and it was described as
"unsafe at any speed".
921
00:45:37,068 --> 00:45:38,820
(LAUGHTER)
922
00:45:38,862 --> 00:45:42,240
-I just realise that now.
-(LAUGHTER)
923
00:45:42,282 --> 00:45:43,783
Your first car
was a Fiat Panda.
924
00:45:43,825 --> 00:45:46,161
-Yeah, if you want
an example of a small...
-Oh, my God.
925
00:45:46,202 --> 00:45:49,622
-If you want an example
of a small car...
a Fiat Panda is what you...
926
00:45:49,664 --> 00:45:52,208
It'd be like you trying to
get into a cupboard
under the stairs.
927
00:45:52,250 --> 00:45:53,793
-It was called a what?
-A Panda.
928
00:45:53,835 --> 00:45:55,962
-A Panda?
-Yeah.
929
00:45:56,004 --> 00:45:59,007
They're very rare now,
like Pandas.
930
00:45:59,048 --> 00:46:01,384
-Didn't you have people
steal the windscreen?
-Yeah.
931
00:46:01,426 --> 00:46:04,053
They have a peculiar thing,
the Panda.
932
00:46:04,095 --> 00:46:05,972
-It has a very flat--
-Completely flat.
933
00:46:06,014 --> 00:46:09,350
Completely flat, and you
used to be able to pop
it out, from the outside.
934
00:46:09,392 --> 00:46:11,060
So, many times
I'd get into it
935
00:46:11,102 --> 00:46:14,772
and be driving down the road
and go, "Something's wrong."
936
00:46:14,772 --> 00:46:14,774
and be driving down the road
and go, "Something's wrong."
-(LAUGHTER)
-Like that.
937
00:46:14,774 --> 00:46:16,858
-(LAUGHTER)
-Like that.
938
00:46:16,900 --> 00:46:19,194
You wouldn't even get that
fast, so you'd never know.
939
00:46:19,235 --> 00:46:20,361
Yeah.
940
00:46:20,403 --> 00:46:23,531
It was only when you turned
the squirters on that it...
941
00:46:23,573 --> 00:46:26,075
-And that happened a lot?
-Well, it happened a few times.
942
00:46:26,117 --> 00:46:29,454
And then I kept buying them
out of this Italian guy
943
00:46:29,496 --> 00:46:31,122
that had a garage
round the corner.
944
00:46:31,164 --> 00:46:33,500
-I think he was nicking 'em.
-(LAUGHTER)
945
00:46:33,541 --> 00:46:37,086
"That's my tax disc."
946
00:46:37,128 --> 00:46:38,922
Now we've gotta
get onto KITT.
947
00:46:38,963 --> 00:46:42,300
We all remember Knight Rider
and the Trans Am.
948
00:46:42,342 --> 00:46:44,928
Thing is, I was looking the
other day, cos it's a while...
949
00:46:44,969 --> 00:46:47,805
-When was it actually on?
-It was on from '82 to '86.
950
00:46:47,805 --> 00:46:47,807
-When was it actually on?
-It was on from '82 to '86.
OK, '82 to '86. Now, it had,
in your car, you had cru...
951
00:46:47,807 --> 00:46:50,850
OK, '82 to '86. Now, it had,
in your car, you had cru...
952
00:46:50,892 --> 00:46:52,894
These were all
futuristic things.
953
00:46:52,936 --> 00:46:55,563
Cruise control, pollen
filters in the air con,
954
00:46:55,605 --> 00:46:58,775
vocal commands,
automatic opening doors.
955
00:46:58,818 --> 00:47:00,818
You get all that stuff
on a Ford Fiesta now.
956
00:47:00,818 --> 00:47:00,820
You get all that stuff
on a Ford Fiesta now.
-(LAUGHTER)
-It's actually standard
on a Ford Fiesta.
957
00:47:00,820 --> 00:47:04,364
-(LAUGHTER)
-It's actually standard
on a Ford Fiesta.
958
00:47:04,405 --> 00:47:06,866
It still really did
capture the imagination.
959
00:47:06,908 --> 00:47:09,327
There was a Yorkshireman
who did an homage to KITT.
960
00:47:09,369 --> 00:47:10,495
-Oh, no.
-Yeah.
961
00:47:10,537 --> 00:47:12,372
-Got a picture of it here.
-It wasn't me.
962
00:47:12,413 --> 00:47:14,123
No, look.
963
00:47:14,165 --> 00:47:16,417
(LAUGHTER)
964
00:47:16,459 --> 00:47:19,754
-A, it's a Renault.
-It's not that bad.
It's not bad.
965
00:47:19,796 --> 00:47:21,839
-Formula One drivers have a--
-Exactly.
966
00:47:21,881 --> 00:47:23,841
-A stick like that.
-I see nothing wrong with that.
967
00:47:23,883 --> 00:47:25,093
But no, because...
968
00:47:25,134 --> 00:47:27,971
You've come up with
your rules of the road,
which I quite like.
969
00:47:28,012 --> 00:47:30,473
You've got one here.
Old people over a certain age
970
00:47:30,515 --> 00:47:33,810
should be legally required to
place a hat
on the parcel shelf.
971
00:47:33,853 --> 00:47:34,978
(LAUGHTER)
972
00:47:35,019 --> 00:47:37,647
Now, old people... Not so
much old people in general.
973
00:47:37,689 --> 00:47:40,066
I was gonna say be careful,
because if you say 65...
974
00:47:40,108 --> 00:47:43,403
-Yeah, that's me.
-No, I'm just saying...
975
00:47:43,444 --> 00:47:46,281
On certain journeys,
I'd like to put a hat
on the parcel shelf,
976
00:47:46,322 --> 00:47:48,616
just to indicate
that I'm not racing you.
977
00:47:48,658 --> 00:47:50,868
What I really like
is this business of um...
978
00:47:50,910 --> 00:47:53,913
male and female cyclists
should indicate
on their Lycra bottoms
979
00:47:53,955 --> 00:47:58,126
-what sex they are.
-Yeah, definitely. Yeah.
980
00:47:58,167 --> 00:48:00,211
-Well, I know...
-(APPLAUSE)
981
00:48:00,253 --> 00:48:02,422
I know where you're going
with that.
982
00:48:02,463 --> 00:48:04,257
(CHUCKLES LECHEROUSLY)
983
00:48:04,299 --> 00:48:05,717
(LAUGHTER)
984
00:48:05,758 --> 00:48:09,387
We've all been...
"Ooh, I say!
Oh, no, he's got a beard."
985
00:48:09,429 --> 00:48:11,139
(LAUGHTER)
986
00:48:11,180 --> 00:48:13,391
Now, I wanna get
on to your laps.
987
00:48:13,433 --> 00:48:15,893
-Oh.
-And I wanna start off,
if I may,
988
00:48:15,893 --> 00:48:15,895
-Oh.
-And I wanna start off,
if I may,
-with you, your Hoffmeister.
-Oi.
989
00:48:15,895 --> 00:48:18,771
-with you, your Hoffmeister.
-Oi.
990
00:48:18,813 --> 00:48:20,607
Are you a fast driver?
991
00:48:20,648 --> 00:48:25,028
You know, I um...
I'm basically an actor.
992
00:48:25,069 --> 00:48:27,196
You know, I'm not
really a good driver
993
00:48:27,238 --> 00:48:30,033
but I just look good
doing it.
994
00:48:30,074 --> 00:48:32,076
(LAUGHTER)
995
00:48:32,118 --> 00:48:35,204
Because we have some
footage of you attempting...
996
00:48:35,246 --> 00:48:39,334
I think it was your first one
and making a bit of a mess-up
of what is the last corner...
997
00:48:39,375 --> 00:48:41,669
-Right.
-And then really making
a mess-up of the finish.
998
00:48:41,711 --> 00:48:43,755
Let's have a look at this.
999
00:48:43,796 --> 00:48:47,175
Here he comes now, into the
last corner, goes in deep,
1000
00:48:47,216 --> 00:48:49,510
which is crazy,
loses it on the grass
1001
00:48:49,552 --> 00:48:51,971
and then there's
the finish line - and stops.
1002
00:48:52,013 --> 00:48:54,515
(LAUGHTER)
1003
00:48:57,060 --> 00:49:00,229
-We've never seen
that before.
-No...
1004
00:49:00,271 --> 00:49:03,691
They told me
the first lap didn't count.
1005
00:49:03,733 --> 00:49:06,861
-Yes.
-And that's why I didn't
hit the finish line.
1006
00:49:06,903 --> 00:49:08,863
-We can edit out that excuse.
-Ah, come on!
1007
00:49:08,905 --> 00:49:11,115
I love the idea of a Formula
One driver going...
1008
00:49:11,157 --> 00:49:14,243
Well, that's it, and that's
as far as I'm going.
1009
00:49:14,285 --> 00:49:16,162
-Am I? Yes.
-Anyway.
1010
00:49:16,204 --> 00:49:19,666
Let's have a look at
the Hoff's lap.
1011
00:49:19,707 --> 00:49:23,294
And we are off
on our brand-new track
in our brand-new car.
1012
00:49:23,336 --> 00:49:25,630
Remember,
Knight Rider drove himself.
1013
00:49:25,672 --> 00:49:26,798
(LAUGHS)
1014
00:49:29,926 --> 00:49:33,721
Clipping the corner
but keeping two wheels
on the track, nice to see.
1015
00:49:33,763 --> 00:49:36,099
And then you go left
and onto the gravel.
1016
00:49:38,851 --> 00:49:41,187
This is what we call
the difficult bit.
1017
00:49:41,229 --> 00:49:42,647
It is actually quite tricky
1018
00:49:42,689 --> 00:49:45,108
as you flick it right there
and then flick it left.
1019
00:49:45,149 --> 00:49:47,610
Now we're into - not the
Carousel - the Gravelsel.
1020
00:49:50,405 --> 00:49:53,616
It's like a banked
gravel corner.
1021
00:49:53,658 --> 00:49:55,743
Never been seen
anywhere before.
1022
00:49:55,785 --> 00:49:57,578
(CHUCKLING)
1023
00:49:57,620 --> 00:50:00,540
Into the difficult bit two.
1024
00:50:00,581 --> 00:50:03,459
You're managing
to keep it mostly tidy,
which is quite good.
1025
00:50:03,501 --> 00:50:07,088
I'm looking forward to seeing
Judi Dench go down here
one day - sideways.
1026
00:50:07,130 --> 00:50:08,381
Ooh, deep again!
1027
00:50:08,423 --> 00:50:11,134
Nearly stopped, but now
picking up the speed.
1028
00:50:13,261 --> 00:50:15,012
And onto the main straight.
1029
00:50:15,012 --> 00:50:15,014
And onto the main straight.
This is one helluva track,
this.
1030
00:50:15,014 --> 00:50:17,140
This is one helluva track,
this.
1031
00:50:20,560 --> 00:50:26,023
Hit it! Yeah! (YELLS)
1032
00:50:26,023 --> 00:50:26,025
Hit it! Yeah! (YELLS)
That was the sound
of a man crapping himself.
1033
00:50:26,025 --> 00:50:28,067
That was the sound
of a man crapping himself.
1034
00:50:28,109 --> 00:50:30,862
And I don't think
you did actually lift,
which is brave.
1035
00:50:30,903 --> 00:50:32,321
Now braking.
1036
00:50:32,363 --> 00:50:34,490
Are we gonna get
the last corner right?
1037
00:50:34,532 --> 00:50:36,701
Yes. All neatly done
and there we are.
1038
00:50:36,743 --> 00:50:39,162
Ladies and gentlemen,
across the line!
1039
00:50:39,203 --> 00:50:41,372
-(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)
-Well...
1040
00:50:46,002 --> 00:50:49,589
That looked like
you were in control.
1041
00:50:49,630 --> 00:50:52,216
-No, I... No.
-No, that was tidy.
1042
00:50:52,258 --> 00:50:55,511
The slower you look,
very often the faster
you're going.
1043
00:50:55,553 --> 00:50:57,513
-Yeah.
-I mean, that is a true fact.
1044
00:50:57,555 --> 00:51:00,600
Yeah, if you go smooth
and keep the car on balance,
but it's hard to do.
1045
00:51:00,641 --> 00:51:03,060
It is. I went out and had
a play on that this morning,
1046
00:51:03,060 --> 00:51:03,062
It is. I went out and had
a play on that this morning,
and just had... the tail out
the entire way round.
1047
00:51:03,062 --> 00:51:05,438
and just had... the tail out
the entire way round.
1048
00:51:05,480 --> 00:51:10,067
It's taken me 15 minutes to
get round here but I had fun
in the process. Anyway.
1049
00:51:10,067 --> 00:51:10,069
It's taken me 15 minutes to
get round here but I had fun
in the process. Anyway.
-Can I use that as my excuse?
-No.
1050
00:51:10,069 --> 00:51:11,694
-Can I use that as my excuse?
-No.
1051
00:51:11,736 --> 00:51:14,989
We're gonna see your lap now.
OK, are we ready?
1052
00:51:15,031 --> 00:51:17,575
Let's bring it up. Here
he is, Ricky Wilson's lap.
1053
00:51:17,617 --> 00:51:20,203
RICKY:
Little bit further back
than you were.
1054
00:51:20,244 --> 00:51:22,538
JEREMY: Nice excuse
and we haven't even started.
1055
00:51:22,580 --> 00:51:24,999
Not even looking. No hands.
No hands. No hands.
1056
00:51:25,041 --> 00:51:27,043
(LAUGHTER)
1057
00:51:27,086 --> 00:51:28,169
(TYRES SCREECH)
1058
00:51:28,211 --> 00:51:31,631
JEREMY:
Ooh, it's deep, deep, deep.
Getting it all together.
1059
00:51:31,672 --> 00:51:33,049
But it's not bad
slowing down there
1060
00:51:33,092 --> 00:51:35,092
cos you can
now keep the power on there,
1061
00:51:35,092 --> 00:51:35,094
cos you can
now keep the power on there,
keep the power on here,
and onto the difficult bit.
1062
00:51:35,094 --> 00:51:38,095
keep the power on here,
and onto the difficult bit.
1063
00:51:40,014 --> 00:51:42,016
No, that's good. Gonna flick
the tail out a bit?
1064
00:51:42,058 --> 00:51:44,310
Yeah, that's nice.
Flick it the other way.
1065
00:51:44,352 --> 00:51:47,438
RICKY: I found that
made you go quicker,
flicking the tail out.
1066
00:51:47,480 --> 00:51:51,108
Whoo-hoo! Take that!
1067
00:51:51,150 --> 00:51:53,736
JEREMY:
This is good, round the
Gravelsel. Get that tail out.
1068
00:51:53,778 --> 00:51:55,863
There it is.
We're gonna find out later
1069
00:51:55,905 --> 00:51:58,699
whether that's faster
or slower than
the Hoff's approach.
1070
00:51:58,741 --> 00:52:02,036
Cutting the corner.
That's not going to be grass
for very much longer.
1071
00:52:02,078 --> 00:52:05,206
That's very good.
Very good indeed.
1072
00:52:05,248 --> 00:52:06,958
Also, when you come back
to the Tarmac here,
1073
00:52:06,999 --> 00:52:08,751
it's very, very slippery,
that bit.
1074
00:52:08,793 --> 00:52:11,087
For reasons
I don't understand.
1075
00:52:11,130 --> 00:52:13,631
(TYRES SCREECHING)
1076
00:52:13,673 --> 00:52:16,008
Kicking dust off the tail.
Looks good, that car.
1077
00:52:16,050 --> 00:52:17,844
And now,
onto the straight.
1078
00:52:19,053 --> 00:52:22,557
Give it some. Come on, Jag.
1079
00:52:22,598 --> 00:52:24,475
JEREMY: Did you lift here?
-Yes.
1080
00:52:24,517 --> 00:52:26,727
(LAUGHTER)
1081
00:52:26,769 --> 00:52:28,813
-I don't think you did.
-Ah, well, maybe not.
1082
00:52:28,855 --> 00:52:31,148
-I don't think you did there.
-I was having too much
of a good time.
1083
00:52:31,190 --> 00:52:34,652
Ooh, kick the tail out at the
last corner and there we are,
across the line.
1084
00:52:34,694 --> 00:52:37,655
-(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)
-It looked all right.
It looked all right.
1085
00:52:37,697 --> 00:52:41,284
-I'm a little nervous now.
-It looked all right.
1086
00:52:41,325 --> 00:52:43,411
-Are you proud?
-Yeah, I am quite proud.
1087
00:52:43,452 --> 00:52:45,079
-Proud of that.
-Yeah.
1088
00:52:45,121 --> 00:52:46,539
Oh.
1089
00:52:46,581 --> 00:52:48,958
Have I remembered to bring
the times out with me?
1090
00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:50,877
-Oh, gosh.
-Yes, I have.
1091
00:52:50,918 --> 00:52:52,628
I think it's you.
1092
00:52:52,670 --> 00:52:55,047
I think it's you, cos you
looked more in control.
1093
00:52:55,089 --> 00:52:56,632
I was all over the shop.
1094
00:52:56,674 --> 00:52:58,634
Yeah, but no...
you were smooth.
1095
00:52:58,676 --> 00:53:01,429
-And I stopped
at the first corner.
-(LAUGHTER)
1096
00:53:01,470 --> 00:53:04,348
You did virtually stop,
that is true. You did
actually come to a halt.
1097
00:53:04,390 --> 00:53:06,350
Mind you, you stopped
just before the finish line.
1098
00:53:06,392 --> 00:53:08,644
-Yeah, yeah.
-(LAUGHTER)
1099
00:53:08,686 --> 00:53:12,398
David Hasselhoff,
you did it...
1100
00:53:12,440 --> 00:53:14,442
representing the United
States of America.
1101
00:53:14,483 --> 00:53:16,652
-Oh, God.
-(LAUGHTER)
1102
00:53:16,694 --> 00:53:18,279
One minute...
1103
00:53:18,321 --> 00:53:19,989
24, point one.
1104
00:53:20,031 --> 00:53:22,533
We have no idea
whether that's fastest.
1105
00:53:22,575 --> 00:53:23,951
(APPLAUSE)
1106
00:53:23,993 --> 00:53:27,455
-Yeah. It could be anything.
-Literally no idea.
1107
00:53:27,496 --> 00:53:30,583
That could be
the fastest time
1108
00:53:30,625 --> 00:53:33,044
we're ever, ever
going to see round here.
1109
00:53:33,085 --> 00:53:35,338
-Right.
-Or it could be the slowest.
1110
00:53:35,379 --> 00:53:37,256
-We have no idea.
-(LAUGHTER)
1111
00:53:37,298 --> 00:53:39,508
-Ricky Wilson.
-Yeah, yeah.
1112
00:53:39,550 --> 00:53:42,803
One minute...
1113
00:53:42,845 --> 00:53:45,514
-...20...
AUDIENCE: Ooh.
1114
00:53:45,556 --> 00:53:47,016
...point one.
1115
00:53:47,058 --> 00:53:49,143
-Whoo!
-(CHEERING)
1116
00:53:50,229 --> 00:53:51,687
Whoo!
1117
00:53:54,565 --> 00:53:57,318
Ohh!
1118
00:53:57,360 --> 00:53:59,862
-I... Oh.
-Well, there we are.
1119
00:53:59,904 --> 00:54:02,615
Well.
1120
00:54:02,657 --> 00:54:05,284
So, there we are.
How do you feel about that?
1121
00:54:05,326 --> 00:54:08,579
-I've spent years practising.
-(LAUGHTER)
1122
00:54:08,621 --> 00:54:11,499
-I told you I was an actor.
-(LAUGHTER)
1123
00:54:11,540 --> 00:54:12,833
(CLEARS THROAT)
1124
00:54:12,875 --> 00:54:15,252
David Hasselhoff...
and, as it turns out,
1125
00:54:15,294 --> 00:54:20,216
the fastest former
talent judge in the world,
Ricky Wilson!
1126
00:54:20,259 --> 00:54:23,135
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
1127
00:54:23,177 --> 00:54:24,804
Thank you, gentlemen.
1128
00:54:29,475 --> 00:54:32,603
Right, let's get back
to Switzerland.
1129
00:54:32,645 --> 00:54:35,106
When we left the action,
Jeremy had torn the tyre
1130
00:54:35,147 --> 00:54:37,233
clean off his Lamborghini,
1131
00:54:37,276 --> 00:54:40,277
and we thought
that would be it, as far as
accidents are concerned.
1132
00:54:40,319 --> 00:54:42,530
Mm-hm, we figured that
because we are all
1133
00:54:42,571 --> 00:54:44,490
experienced,
professional drivers,
1134
00:54:44,532 --> 00:54:47,284
nothing else
could possibly go wrong.
1135
00:54:47,326 --> 00:54:48,995
-(LAUGHTER)
-Exactly.
1136
00:54:49,036 --> 00:54:51,372
So we pick up the story
at our wellness clinic,
1137
00:54:51,414 --> 00:54:52,915
where we were
trying to work out
1138
00:54:52,957 --> 00:54:55,126
how to get the best
out of three supercars
1139
00:54:55,167 --> 00:54:58,254
in a country where
motor racing is banned.
1140
00:54:59,839 --> 00:55:01,716
(BIRDSONG)
1141
00:55:01,757 --> 00:55:03,259
JEREMY: This was not easy,
1142
00:55:03,302 --> 00:55:06,971
given the activity that
Hammond had planned
for us that night.
1143
00:55:08,597 --> 00:55:10,599
(GENTLE MUSIC)
1144
00:55:12,727 --> 00:55:14,729
Arghh! Jesus!
1145
00:55:16,814 --> 00:55:19,233
RICHARD: Well, we could
always go to a museum.
1146
00:55:19,275 --> 00:55:21,485
We need to go to
a race track, Hammond.
1147
00:55:21,527 --> 00:55:25,239
Well, look, actually,
as we're in Switzerland...
Clarkson?
1148
00:55:25,281 --> 00:55:27,616
-What?
-Can you do... Argh!
1149
00:55:27,658 --> 00:55:30,995
Can you do hill climbs in
Switzerland under their laws?
1150
00:55:31,037 --> 00:55:33,789
I don't know.
I've got a tube up my arse.
1151
00:55:33,831 --> 00:55:35,082
Well, seriously,
you've been here before.
1152
00:55:35,124 --> 00:55:38,210
You're supposedly
the motorsport expert,
you always say.
1153
00:55:38,252 --> 00:55:41,255
JEREMY: I don't know.
I've got a tube up my arse.
1154
00:55:41,297 --> 00:55:43,549
Yeah, but the thing
that they banned was...
1155
00:55:43,591 --> 00:55:45,176
because in the famous
Le Mans crash,
1156
00:55:45,217 --> 00:55:47,094
cars crashed into each other.
1157
00:55:47,136 --> 00:55:50,306
That can't happen in a hill
climb, so would they allow
stuff against the clock?
1158
00:55:50,349 --> 00:55:53,059
I don't know because I've
got a tube up my arse.
1159
00:55:53,100 --> 00:55:54,977
Come on, think, Clarkson.
1160
00:55:55,019 --> 00:55:58,230
JEREMY: I think you can do
hill climbing in Switzerland,
1161
00:55:58,272 --> 00:56:01,525
but I don't know for sure
because I've got a tube
up my arse.
1162
00:56:01,567 --> 00:56:03,944
Right. OK, that's a start.
1163
00:56:03,986 --> 00:56:06,864
Let's see if
we can find out... Argh!
1164
00:56:11,619 --> 00:56:13,829
JEREMY: After a bit
of digging around,
1165
00:56:13,871 --> 00:56:18,250
James discovered there was
a Swiss hill climb event
on that weekend...
1166
00:56:18,292 --> 00:56:21,587
and it was only 200 miles
from our hotel.
1167
00:56:21,629 --> 00:56:23,464
(ENGINES ROARING)
1168
00:56:23,506 --> 00:56:25,549
Which was fine...
for some of us.
1169
00:56:28,094 --> 00:56:31,388
At this speed, six of my 12
cylinders are shut down.
1170
00:56:31,430 --> 00:56:33,474
They're not using
any fuel at all,
1171
00:56:33,516 --> 00:56:38,062
so I could probably do
400 miles on the fuel I have.
1172
00:56:39,438 --> 00:56:40,940
Just check on James.
1173
00:56:40,981 --> 00:56:44,860
Er, James, are you able
to make the hill climb event
200 miles away?
1174
00:56:44,902 --> 00:56:47,822
Well, let me just have a
look. Er, yes, I am.
1175
00:56:47,863 --> 00:56:50,991
JEREMY: Well, how do you
know with that fuel gauge?
1176
00:56:51,033 --> 00:56:53,536
Bec...
Oh, I can't be bothered.
1177
00:56:53,577 --> 00:56:56,163
It's not straight, is it?
Admit it.
1178
00:56:56,205 --> 00:56:59,959
RICHARD: Happy piling
the motorway miles on your
precious cars, are we? Good.
1179
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:03,003
Why is there somebody talking
to us from a van, James?
1180
00:57:03,045 --> 00:57:04,713
It's a lorry!
1181
00:57:04,755 --> 00:57:06,674
Hey, Hammond, I don't know
where you are, but there's
1182
00:57:06,715 --> 00:57:09,844
a really remarkable-looking
futuristic car
on the back of a truck.
1183
00:57:09,885 --> 00:57:13,055
Must just be a mock-up,
I suppose, otherwise it
would be being driven.
1184
00:57:13,097 --> 00:57:16,267
RICHARD: Yeah, you pile
the miles on. Enjoy yourself!
1185
00:57:16,308 --> 00:57:18,102
I don't see
what's wrong with this.
1186
00:57:18,144 --> 00:57:20,855
People don't ride
their race horses to
the Grand National, do they?
1187
00:57:20,896 --> 00:57:22,940
They put them on a lorry.
Every weekend,
1188
00:57:22,982 --> 00:57:26,652
people all over the world,
load their best toys
onto a truck,
1189
00:57:26,694 --> 00:57:28,612
take them somewhere
and enjoy them.
1190
00:57:28,654 --> 00:57:31,323
Horses, supercars, race cars,
1191
00:57:31,365 --> 00:57:33,701
rally cars,
race bikes, dirt bikes.
1192
00:57:33,742 --> 00:57:35,244
All of them.
It's what you do.
1193
00:57:35,286 --> 00:57:39,331
Prepare to deploy smug face
at Richard Hammond.
1194
00:57:39,373 --> 00:57:42,418
(ENGINE ROARS)
1195
00:57:42,461 --> 00:57:46,130
JEREMY: After leaving
the van driver far behind,
1196
00:57:46,172 --> 00:57:49,383
James and I arrived at
what's almost certainly
1197
00:57:49,425 --> 00:57:53,137
the most beautiful hill climb
event in the world.
1198
00:57:57,266 --> 00:57:59,059
And the cars
weren't bad either.
1199
00:57:59,101 --> 00:58:01,687
(ENGINES ROARING)
1200
00:58:05,399 --> 00:58:06,525
(TYRES SCREECHING)
1201
00:58:10,946 --> 00:58:12,740
We were keen
to get cracking,
1202
00:58:12,781 --> 00:58:17,286
but, first, we had some
important business
to attend to.
1203
00:58:17,328 --> 00:58:20,039
-(MOANS OF PLEASURE)
-Oh, brown food.
1204
00:58:20,080 --> 00:58:21,373
Brown drink.
1205
00:58:21,415 --> 00:58:23,250
-Calories.
-Mm-mm.
1206
00:58:23,292 --> 00:58:26,378
Oh. Oh.
1207
00:58:26,420 --> 00:58:28,714
Oh. Mm.
1208
00:58:28,756 --> 00:58:30,591
I'm actually shaking,
I'm so excited.
1209
00:58:30,633 --> 00:58:32,676
Mm. (MUMBLES) Mm.
1210
00:58:32,718 --> 00:58:34,386
(FOOD MAKES SPEECH UNCLEAR)
1211
00:58:34,428 --> 00:58:36,472
(HORN TOOTING RAPIDLY)
1212
00:58:36,515 --> 00:58:38,140
-What?
-Look who's here.
1213
00:58:38,182 --> 00:58:40,309
Oh, yeah,
it's the van driver.
1214
00:58:43,729 --> 00:58:46,357
(HE GRUNTS) Ah.
1215
00:58:46,398 --> 00:58:48,817
He won't have the energy
to drive up the hill.
1216
00:58:48,859 --> 00:58:51,654
-What?
-He won't have the energy
to drive up the hill.
1217
00:58:51,695 --> 00:58:53,948
Here I am, car rested,
ready and fully charged.
1218
00:58:53,989 --> 00:58:55,991
Breakfast. Actual food.
1219
00:58:56,033 --> 00:58:57,451
Brown food.
1220
00:58:57,493 --> 00:59:01,288
Yeah. Well, professional
racers do carb load,
don't they, before races.
1221
00:59:01,330 --> 00:59:05,542
-So, you're sort of...
-Like all athletes carb load.
-They don't lettuce load.
1222
00:59:05,584 --> 00:59:08,629
As I walked over, I saw you
two and thought, "Athletes."
1223
00:59:08,671 --> 00:59:12,216
Shut up, Hammond.
1224
00:59:12,258 --> 00:59:15,970
JEREMY: With breakfast
demolished, it was time
to go hill climbing.
1225
00:59:17,846 --> 00:59:20,057
But before we did
our timed runs,
1226
00:59:20,099 --> 00:59:22,561
we had to learn
the course.
1227
00:59:25,104 --> 00:59:27,773
Corsa. Track mode.
1228
00:59:27,815 --> 00:59:29,817
Traction control... off.
1229
00:59:31,735 --> 00:59:34,154
No, traction control on.
1230
00:59:35,489 --> 00:59:37,283
Practising, Jeremy,
practising.
1231
00:59:37,324 --> 00:59:39,576
Don't showboat.
Must beat Hammond.
1232
00:59:39,618 --> 00:59:42,997
It's a 1.09 mile course.
1233
00:59:44,415 --> 00:59:46,250
It has 11 corners.
1234
00:59:48,752 --> 00:59:52,047
And the most important factor
in all of this
1235
00:59:52,089 --> 00:59:55,718
is my ability to concentrate
and remember how it goes.
1236
00:59:57,428 --> 00:59:59,179
Everything good.
1237
00:59:59,221 --> 01:00:01,140
Creep mode off,
suspension low.
1238
01:00:01,181 --> 01:00:03,183
Race mode. We're good.
1239
01:00:03,225 --> 01:00:04,727
(ENGINE ROARING)
1240
01:00:07,980 --> 01:00:10,691
Ok, that's a good start.
1241
01:00:10,733 --> 01:00:14,862
It's a bit wobbly going up
here, but... Oh, lordy lord!
1242
01:00:14,903 --> 01:00:17,156
Jesus Christ,
it's tight and narrow.
1243
01:00:19,908 --> 01:00:21,702
(ENGINE ROARS)
1244
01:00:21,744 --> 01:00:25,205
(HUMS TO HIMSELF)
No idea what I'm doing.
1245
01:00:25,247 --> 01:00:29,251
No, that's not as tight
as I thought.
That was a mistake.
1246
01:00:29,293 --> 01:00:31,295
(HOOTER)
1247
01:00:31,337 --> 01:00:34,340
Unleash 1200 horsepower,
bit of brakes.
1248
01:00:34,381 --> 01:00:37,051
It's no problem.
1249
01:00:37,092 --> 01:00:39,553
No looking at the drops.
Drops are irrelevant.
1250
01:00:40,971 --> 01:00:43,265
(HOOTER)
1251
01:00:47,644 --> 01:00:49,355
Balancing it
through there nicely.
1252
01:00:51,815 --> 01:00:54,401
This is starting
to come together now.
1253
01:00:55,861 --> 01:00:58,447
This is the long
right-hander, I think.
1254
01:00:58,489 --> 01:01:00,574
No, this is
the long right-hander.
1255
01:01:01,660 --> 01:01:03,869
It's bloody complicated.
1256
01:01:03,911 --> 01:01:05,746
Getting on it, getting on it,
getting on it.
1257
01:01:07,748 --> 01:01:10,667
This could go so wrong.
1258
01:01:10,667 --> 01:01:10,669
This could go so wrong.
JEREMY: With the practice
session complete,
1259
01:01:10,669 --> 01:01:12,669
JEREMY: With the practice
session complete,
1260
01:01:12,669 --> 01:01:12,671
JEREMY: With the practice
session complete,
it was time to go
against the clock.
1261
01:01:12,671 --> 01:01:15,047
it was time to go
against the clock.
1262
01:01:15,089 --> 01:01:17,383
And for me,
this was a problem.
1263
01:01:17,424 --> 01:01:20,761
Because the rules said
that in timed runs,
1264
01:01:20,803 --> 01:01:22,888
I had to wear a helmet.
1265
01:01:24,723 --> 01:01:26,517
No.
1266
01:01:26,558 --> 01:01:28,602
(GROANS)
1267
01:01:28,644 --> 01:01:29,895
No.
1268
01:01:29,937 --> 01:01:32,147
Right, well, I can
either drive like this,
1269
01:01:32,189 --> 01:01:34,650
with a helmet on, or...
1270
01:01:36,110 --> 01:01:38,153
What the hell
are we gonna do?
1271
01:01:38,195 --> 01:01:41,365
It was time
to break out my genius.
1272
01:01:43,367 --> 01:01:45,953
Lamborghini's got one of
their test drivers here.
1273
01:01:45,994 --> 01:01:48,705
He's about this big.
1274
01:01:48,705 --> 01:01:48,707
He's about this big.
-What's your name?
-Giacomo.
1275
01:01:48,707 --> 01:01:50,874
-What's your name?
-Giacomo.
1276
01:01:50,916 --> 01:01:52,626
-Giacomo.
-Giacomo is the Italian name.
1277
01:01:52,668 --> 01:01:53,836
-Yiacomo.
-Giacomo.
1278
01:01:53,877 --> 01:01:55,504
-Jack-mo.
-Giacomo.
1279
01:01:55,546 --> 01:01:57,965
Whatever. Don't worry.
You look exactly like me.
1280
01:01:58,006 --> 01:02:00,259
I'll tilt that camera down,
it'll make you look taller.
1281
01:02:00,300 --> 01:02:03,262
Be fine with a crash helmet
on. Curly hair, same as me.
1282
01:02:03,303 --> 01:02:05,889
-But you've gotta
sound like me.
-All right.
1283
01:02:05,931 --> 01:02:07,975
So..."Hammond, you idiot!"
Say that.
1284
01:02:08,016 --> 01:02:09,977
-Hammond, you idiot!
-Hammond, you idiot.
1285
01:02:10,018 --> 01:02:11,478
-You idiot.
-You idiot.
1286
01:02:11,520 --> 01:02:13,021
Exactly, because he
always is an idiot.
1287
01:02:13,063 --> 01:02:15,441
So you can always
drop that in.
It's a useful phrase.
1288
01:02:15,482 --> 01:02:20,946
The other one is, this is
the fastest car, pause...
in the world.
1289
01:02:20,988 --> 01:02:25,117
-This is fastest car...
pause...in the world.
-Say it.
1290
01:02:25,159 --> 01:02:27,786
This is the fastest car...
pause, in the world.
1291
01:02:27,828 --> 01:02:29,997
JEREMY:
With all that sorted out,
1292
01:02:30,038 --> 01:02:32,249
James took his place
on the start line.
1293
01:02:34,460 --> 01:02:35,961
This is the big one.
1294
01:02:36,003 --> 01:02:38,881
(DISTORTED ANNOUNCEMENT
IN ITALIAN)
1295
01:02:41,592 --> 01:02:44,303
-...James May!
-(HOOTER)
1296
01:02:44,344 --> 01:02:46,763
(ENGINE ROARS)
1297
01:02:52,060 --> 01:02:53,562
(TYRES SCREECH)
1298
01:02:53,604 --> 01:02:57,274
Now is the tight
right-hander,
so a dab of brakes.
1299
01:03:11,747 --> 01:03:14,082
I'm sorry I didn't
say anything. That was
my concentrating face.
1300
01:03:14,124 --> 01:03:17,586
That's the most I've
concentrated for five years.
1301
01:03:18,879 --> 01:03:21,381
JEREMY: Then it was my turn.
1302
01:03:21,423 --> 01:03:24,635
(DISTORTED ANNOUNCEMENT
IN ITALIAN)
1303
01:03:26,386 --> 01:03:28,472
...Jeremy Clarkson!
1304
01:03:28,514 --> 01:03:30,057
(HOOTER)
1305
01:03:30,098 --> 01:03:32,851
(ENGINE ROARS)
1306
01:03:38,148 --> 01:03:39,900
Hammond, you hidiot.
1307
01:03:42,027 --> 01:03:46,615
This is the fastest car...
pause... in the world.
1308
01:03:46,657 --> 01:03:48,784
(ENGINE ROARING)
1309
01:03:57,918 --> 01:04:01,463
JEREMY: With an astonishing
time on the scoresheet,
1310
01:04:01,505 --> 01:04:03,257
Hammond had it all to do.
1311
01:04:03,298 --> 01:04:05,717
And we decided to give him
some encouragement.
1312
01:04:07,010 --> 01:04:08,554
-Hammond.
-Yeah.
1313
01:04:08,595 --> 01:04:11,682
Really, really, really big
crowds here today,
as you can see.
1314
01:04:11,723 --> 01:04:14,142
-Yeah.
-Because they know...
1315
01:04:14,184 --> 01:04:16,228
you're gonna break
the record here.
1316
01:04:16,270 --> 01:04:18,021
54 seconds.
1317
01:04:18,063 --> 01:04:21,191
Come on, you've got 1200
horsepower, you've been
practising all morning.
1318
01:04:21,233 --> 01:04:23,610
Actually, it is
the most powerful car
here by some margin.
1319
01:04:23,652 --> 01:04:25,571
Well, I can't promise to--
1320
01:04:25,612 --> 01:04:27,614
Well, it's the fastest car
we've ever seen!
1321
01:04:27,656 --> 01:04:30,450
Look at it this way,
the whole of Croatia
1322
01:04:30,492 --> 01:04:34,371
is watching this knowing that
you're gonna do it for them.
1323
01:04:34,413 --> 01:04:36,873
JAMES: In 52 seconds' time,
you're going to be
1324
01:04:36,915 --> 01:04:40,419
whatever the equivalent of a
hero of the Soviet Union is,
but in modern-day Croatia.
1325
01:04:40,460 --> 01:04:43,088
-Not just Croatia.
-It goes spreading out.
1326
01:04:43,130 --> 01:04:45,048
It's the whole
Eastern European region.
1327
01:04:45,090 --> 01:04:46,300
Yeah.
1328
01:04:46,341 --> 01:04:48,885
You have got a lot
riding on your shoulders,
Richard Hammond.
1329
01:04:48,927 --> 01:04:50,220
-You...
-A lot.
1330
01:04:50,262 --> 01:04:52,180
-You will be on a coin.
-Thank you, guys.
1331
01:04:52,222 --> 01:04:54,433
-He'll be on a coin.
-Or a stamp.
1332
01:04:56,643 --> 01:04:59,438
Oh, I'm quite nervous.
I'm suddenly nervous.
1333
01:05:03,609 --> 01:05:06,570
(DISTORTED ANNOUNCEMENT
IN ITALIAN)
1334
01:05:06,612 --> 01:05:09,531
...Ricardo Hammondo!
1335
01:05:09,573 --> 01:05:11,825
RICHARD: OK, here we go.
Give it your best shot, Rich.
1336
01:05:11,867 --> 01:05:13,535
Yeah. Watch this.
1337
01:05:13,577 --> 01:05:15,370
(HOOTER)
1338
01:05:15,412 --> 01:05:17,164
(WHIRRING)
1339
01:05:50,656 --> 01:05:52,824
-Crash!
-(THUDDING AND CLATTERING)
1340
01:05:55,577 --> 01:05:57,663
(RICHARD GROANS)
1341
01:05:57,704 --> 01:05:59,790
(THUDDING AND CLATTERING)
1342
01:05:59,831 --> 01:06:02,542
(SILENCE)
1343
01:06:02,584 --> 01:06:04,586
(SIREN WAILING)
1344
01:06:10,384 --> 01:06:12,386
(SIREN WAILING)
1345
01:06:18,558 --> 01:06:21,269
(SIREN WAILING)
1346
01:06:21,311 --> 01:06:23,647
(SIRENS)
1347
01:06:26,983 --> 01:06:29,653
(CHATTER)
1348
01:06:44,876 --> 01:06:47,212
(SIREN)
1349
01:07:00,308 --> 01:07:03,729
Right, I have the times here.
Are you ready?
1350
01:07:03,770 --> 01:07:06,189
-Representing
the present day...
-(LAUGHTER)
1351
01:07:06,231 --> 01:07:08,900
...the Honda NSX did it in...
1352
01:07:08,942 --> 01:07:11,319
1:20.4.
1353
01:07:11,361 --> 01:07:13,029
-(BLEEPING)
-OK.
1354
01:07:13,029 --> 01:07:13,031
-(BLEEPING)
-OK.
Representing the past,
the Lamborghini Aventador
1355
01:07:13,031 --> 01:07:15,782
Representing the past,
the Lamborghini Aventador
1356
01:07:15,824 --> 01:07:19,035
did it in 1 minute 10.4.
1357
01:07:19,035 --> 01:07:19,037
did it in 1 minute 10.4.
AUDIENCE MEMBERS: Ooh!
1358
01:07:19,037 --> 01:07:20,704
AUDIENCE MEMBERS: Ooh!
1359
01:07:20,746 --> 01:07:23,749
And this is the big one.
Representing the future...
1360
01:07:23,790 --> 01:07:25,375
(LAUGHTER)
1361
01:07:25,417 --> 01:07:28,044
...the Rimac did it in
1362
01:07:28,044 --> 01:07:28,046
...the Rimac did it in
one minute...14.7.
1363
01:07:28,046 --> 01:07:31,631
one minute...14.7.
1364
01:07:31,673 --> 01:07:33,550
Yes! I am the winner!
1365
01:07:33,592 --> 01:07:35,010
(APPLAUSE)
1366
01:07:35,053 --> 01:07:37,304
-Oh, I am victorious.
-No, wait! Wait a minute.
1367
01:07:37,345 --> 01:07:39,139
-(APPLAUSE)
-Wait a minute.
1368
01:07:39,181 --> 01:07:43,268
-The past and me.
-You weren't even driving
the bloody car.
1369
01:07:43,310 --> 01:07:45,604
Well, you were driving
your car and you crashed it.
1370
01:07:45,645 --> 01:07:49,858
Yes, but I crashed
after the finishing line,
like a professional.
1371
01:07:49,900 --> 01:07:51,276
(LAUGHTER)
1372
01:07:51,318 --> 01:07:53,069
Hammond,
when was the last time
1373
01:07:53,069 --> 01:07:53,071
Hammond,
when was the last time
you went home after work
not in an air ambulance?
1374
01:07:53,071 --> 01:07:56,072
you went home after work
not in an air ambulance?
1375
01:07:56,114 --> 01:07:57,491
-(LAUGHTER)
-Now--
1376
01:07:57,532 --> 01:08:00,076
When was the last time
you took your own clothes
off at night,
1377
01:08:00,076 --> 01:08:00,078
When was the last time
you took your own clothes
off at night,
rather than have a paramedic
cut them off in a field?
1378
01:08:00,078 --> 01:08:02,204
rather than have a paramedic
cut them off in a field?
1379
01:08:02,245 --> 01:08:04,956
-Now, hang on a minute.
-You crashed
after the finishing line,
1380
01:08:04,998 --> 01:08:07,125
so our cameras weren't there.
1381
01:08:07,167 --> 01:08:09,085
We had to get that clip
from YouTube.
1382
01:08:09,127 --> 01:08:12,923
-That is not professional.
That is selfish. It is.
-Look...
1383
01:08:12,964 --> 01:08:14,674
I just don't know
how it happened.
1384
01:08:14,716 --> 01:08:16,968
We do. We know
exactly how it happened.
1385
01:08:17,010 --> 01:08:20,096
History has taught us
you can't drive
in a straight line.
1386
01:08:20,096 --> 01:08:20,098
History has taught us
you can't drive
in a straight line.
And now we've seen you can't
drive round a corner either.
1387
01:08:20,098 --> 01:08:22,474
And now we've seen you can't
drive round a corner either.
1388
01:08:22,516 --> 01:08:25,602
Do you know what's
a really remarkable thing
about that crash?
1389
01:08:25,644 --> 01:08:28,230
-What?
-That car continued
to catch fire
1390
01:08:28,271 --> 01:08:30,774
five days after it happened.
1391
01:08:30,816 --> 01:08:34,528
-Fi... What? Bursting into--
-Yeah. Spontaneously
bursting into flames.
1392
01:08:34,569 --> 01:08:38,573
The reason is the accident
damaged one of the cells
in the lithium ion battery.
1393
01:08:38,615 --> 01:08:40,742
That caused a short circuit,
it catches fire,
1394
01:08:40,784 --> 01:08:42,244
but then that damages
the next cell,
1395
01:08:42,285 --> 01:08:44,412
so that one catches fire,
and so it goes on.
1396
01:08:44,454 --> 01:08:47,374
There are 8,000 cells
in that thing.
1397
01:08:47,415 --> 01:08:49,417
It's like a chain reaction.
What do they call it?
1398
01:08:49,459 --> 01:08:51,461
Yeah, chain reaction.
It's called thermal runaways.
1399
01:08:51,503 --> 01:08:53,296
Bang, bang, bang, bang,
and so it goes on.
1400
01:08:53,338 --> 01:08:55,298
-I was all right.
-(LAUGHTER)
1401
01:08:57,175 --> 01:08:59,052
(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)
1402
01:08:59,094 --> 01:09:01,763
Thank you.
1403
01:09:01,805 --> 01:09:06,768
It's relevant. I'm OK.
1404
01:09:06,810 --> 01:09:09,312
We don't care,
and anyway it's time
to end the programme
1405
01:09:09,354 --> 01:09:13,608
with a conclusion to our very
thorough test, and it's this.
1406
01:09:13,650 --> 01:09:16,403
The future is very fast...
1407
01:09:16,444 --> 01:09:19,865
and extremely quiet...
but a bit burney.
1408
01:09:19,906 --> 01:09:21,116
(LAUGHTER)
1409
01:09:21,159 --> 01:09:23,326
And on that terrible
disappointment,
it's time to end.
1410
01:09:23,368 --> 01:09:25,412
Thank you so much
for watching. Goodbye.
1411
01:09:25,453 --> 01:09:27,455
(CHEERING)
108169
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