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1
00:01:22,850 --> 00:01:25,683
How dare you! That's the crudest
remark I've ever heard.
2
00:01:44,200 --> 00:01:45,633
It's okay. It's...
3
00:01:51,789 --> 00:01:54,622
It's okay, we'll get you to a hospital.
4
00:01:59,879 --> 00:02:01,073
Okay, okay.
5
00:02:04,674 --> 00:02:07,791
My wife, she have a baby now.
6
00:02:08,635 --> 00:02:09,909
Okay.
7
00:02:14,973 --> 00:02:17,089
Hey, come back.
8
00:02:17,350 --> 00:02:18,942
Hey, come back.
9
00:02:20,061 --> 00:02:21,540
Hey, don't leave me.
10
00:02:21,812 --> 00:02:24,042
Come back, officer!
11
00:02:52,753 --> 00:02:54,983
Ten minutes? More like 30.
12
00:02:55,254 --> 00:02:58,405
It was an emergency.
I'll split it with you. Fifteen.
13
00:02:58,715 --> 00:03:00,546
Yeah, now I know
why you're always broke.
14
00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:02,631
You can't add.
Come on, what happened?
15
00:03:03,219 --> 00:03:06,370
My motor home had a sudden illness.
The generator died.
16
00:03:06,680 --> 00:03:10,389
No electricity, no water pressure,
no air conditioning, no nothing.
17
00:03:10,725 --> 00:03:12,317
I had to get a mechanic to fix it.
18
00:03:12,559 --> 00:03:16,074
A mechanic? You need a surgeon.
19
00:03:16,771 --> 00:03:19,843
All right, you can laugh.
You got a home, you got a place to stay.
20
00:03:20,149 --> 00:03:22,379
All I got is an emergency on wheels.
21
00:03:23,109 --> 00:03:26,101
Thirty-minute emergency.
We'll have to see if Getraer thinks so.
22
00:03:26,737 --> 00:03:30,491
Hey, he's just a sergeant.
Nobody asked him to think.
23
00:03:32,825 --> 00:03:35,544
Help. Help.
24
00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:39,395
Over here, help me, please.
25
00:03:39,664 --> 00:03:44,294
Over here. Come. Over here.
Help. Help, please!
26
00:03:44,668 --> 00:03:47,387
You came back.
Gracias, gracias, you came back.
27
00:03:47,670 --> 00:03:49,103
What do you mean I came back?
28
00:03:49,338 --> 00:03:51,772
11-82 northbound on Hollywood
and Alvarado.
29
00:03:52,048 --> 00:03:54,243
Quick, mi esposa.
30
00:03:59,220 --> 00:04:02,292
Ponch, call for an ambulance.
Make sure it's equipped for a premature.
31
00:04:02,598 --> 00:04:04,714
This lady doesn't have much time.
32
00:04:05,725 --> 00:04:06,840
- Easy, easy.
- L.A. 15...
33
00:04:07,060 --> 00:04:09,938
Roll a county rescue
for emergency in childbirth.
34
00:04:10,229 --> 00:04:12,265
Okay, just a minute now.
35
00:04:17,985 --> 00:04:20,818
I'm afraid. I'm afraid.
36
00:04:21,112 --> 00:04:23,910
There you are. There you are.
There you are.
37
00:04:24,698 --> 00:04:27,895
Okay, just bear down. Relax, okay?
Let mother nature take its course.
38
00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:29,190
Bear down.
39
00:04:29,410 --> 00:04:31,719
I'm afraid. No, no, I can't.
40
00:04:31,996 --> 00:04:33,588
- No.
- Don't be afraid.
41
00:04:41,586 --> 00:04:43,542
Okay, come on, just take it easy.
42
00:04:49,426 --> 00:04:52,418
Just hang on.
Everything's gonna be okay.
43
00:04:52,720 --> 00:04:54,836
Please, it's our first baby.
44
00:04:55,097 --> 00:04:58,453
We can't lose it. Nothing can happen.
45
00:04:58,766 --> 00:05:00,358
Please don't let nothing happen.
46
00:05:00,601 --> 00:05:02,831
Everything is gonna be great,
it's gonna be great.
47
00:05:10,317 --> 00:05:12,956
- We do this all the time.
- Yeah, we do this all the time.
48
00:05:13,236 --> 00:05:15,625
- We're experts. We're specialists.
- Yeah.
49
00:05:15,904 --> 00:05:19,260
I'm the second-best baby-deliverer
in the world. He's the first.
50
00:05:19,949 --> 00:05:21,746
You're a very lucky woman,
you know that?
51
00:05:24,453 --> 00:05:26,648
Thank you, gracias.
52
00:05:27,955 --> 00:05:29,229
At least you have a car.
53
00:05:29,457 --> 00:05:31,527
My mother had me in a bus.
54
00:05:31,792 --> 00:05:33,783
And look how beautiful I turned out.
55
00:05:35,169 --> 00:05:37,000
No. No.
56
00:05:40,924 --> 00:05:44,758
Okay, just bear down one last time.
Just bear down one last time.
57
00:05:55,226 --> 00:05:56,454
Ponch, look.
58
00:06:05,484 --> 00:06:08,954
I'm a father! I'm a father. I'm a father.
59
00:06:09,279 --> 00:06:12,794
Hey, no cigars. I'm sorry.
Next time, I have.
60
00:06:14,741 --> 00:06:16,971
- It's a girl!
- No, it's a boy.
61
00:06:17,243 --> 00:06:19,882
Okay, it's a boy!
62
00:06:26,959 --> 00:06:28,517
- Where were you?
- Delivering a baby.
63
00:06:28,752 --> 00:06:30,902
Yeah, well, welcome to the club.
64
00:06:39,469 --> 00:06:41,346
Hey, partner, you were beautiful.
65
00:06:41,595 --> 00:06:43,984
You got hands of a surgeon,
did you know that?
66
00:06:44,264 --> 00:06:46,494
Yeah, well, I had a little help
from Mother Nature.
67
00:06:46,766 --> 00:06:48,757
But, hey, you didn't do
too bad yourself.
68
00:06:49,018 --> 00:06:52,806
Yeah, I guess I did pretty good, huh?
I did do a terrific job.
69
00:06:53,146 --> 00:06:54,977
- Thank you.
- Hey, it's okay.
70
00:06:55,231 --> 00:06:57,347
- Gracias, gracias.
- Any time.
71
00:06:57,608 --> 00:06:59,599
- Thank you.
- Congratulations.
72
00:07:06,823 --> 00:07:08,256
What a life.
73
00:07:08,491 --> 00:07:11,961
I bring a baby into the world
and become an orphan myself.
74
00:07:12,286 --> 00:07:13,514
All in one day.
75
00:07:20,834 --> 00:07:23,553
Okay, Ponch, I tell you what.
76
00:07:23,836 --> 00:07:27,511
If your motor home isn't fixed,
you can move into my apartment.
77
00:07:28,548 --> 00:07:30,664
I thought you'd never ask.
78
00:07:32,301 --> 00:07:33,859
For a little while.
79
00:09:18,633 --> 00:09:21,022
Well, if it isn't Ponch, the pediatrician.
80
00:09:21,302 --> 00:09:23,611
Congratulations, guys.
81
00:09:23,887 --> 00:09:27,163
You cheapskate. It was a whole baby.
82
00:09:28,015 --> 00:09:31,769
Hey, my wife is four months along.
You guys gonna be available?
83
00:09:32,102 --> 00:09:35,697
Dr. Jon would be okay.
But sure got an ugly nurse.
84
00:09:37,064 --> 00:09:39,862
What do you guys know?
You're car cops.
85
00:09:40,150 --> 00:09:42,744
Well, we do know Getraer
wants to see you on the double.
86
00:09:43,027 --> 00:09:44,619
I wonder what Getraer wants with us.
87
00:09:44,862 --> 00:09:47,820
Probably wants to offer
congratulations.
88
00:09:48,740 --> 00:09:50,970
Hi, sarge, wanna see us?
89
00:09:51,241 --> 00:09:52,833
Oh, yeah.
90
00:09:53,076 --> 00:09:54,191
Wanna take a seat?
91
00:09:54,411 --> 00:09:58,324
I bet you wanna offer congratulations
on the delivery of a beautiful baby girl.
92
00:09:58,664 --> 00:10:01,132
Ponch, baby boy, remember, baby boy?
93
00:10:01,416 --> 00:10:03,452
Hey, either way, it was a baby.
94
00:10:03,709 --> 00:10:04,983
And it wasn't easy, sarge.
95
00:10:05,211 --> 00:10:07,566
I mean, the strain alone
can wear down a normal man.
96
00:10:07,838 --> 00:10:12,309
Yet me and my faithful partner here,
we delivered new life into this world...
97
00:10:12,675 --> 00:10:14,666
...under the most adverse conditions,
sarge.
98
00:10:14,926 --> 00:10:18,555
Fine, Frank, fine.
Now, would you mind sitting down?
99
00:10:23,433 --> 00:10:24,786
Look.
100
00:10:25,893 --> 00:10:27,770
I had a complaint today.
101
00:10:28,061 --> 00:10:32,418
It seems that one of my motor officers
was a little more than charming...
102
00:10:32,773 --> 00:10:36,766
...to a certain female motorist.
I believe the term is "coming on strong. "
103
00:10:37,110 --> 00:10:40,307
The young lady checked
the squad pictures out in the hall...
104
00:10:40,613 --> 00:10:42,444
...and picked you out, Jon.
105
00:10:43,573 --> 00:10:45,006
Wait a minute, she picked me?
106
00:10:45,241 --> 00:10:48,153
Yeah, it's more than just being
a little friendly with the ladies.
107
00:10:48,452 --> 00:10:52,286
She claims that you upset her and she
pulled out into traffic without looking.
108
00:10:52,622 --> 00:10:54,021
I wasn't even there.
109
00:10:54,248 --> 00:10:57,285
I know you weren't, Jon.
But that couple you played doctor for...
110
00:10:57,584 --> 00:11:00,098
...they identified her car
as the one that cut him off...
111
00:11:00,378 --> 00:11:01,970
...and you as the officer involved.
112
00:11:02,213 --> 00:11:05,967
In fact, she said you came to check him
out and then left to get your partner.
113
00:11:06,299 --> 00:11:08,529
I don't care what they said.
It's not true. I was...
114
00:11:08,801 --> 00:11:10,553
Jon, I believe you, you know that.
115
00:11:10,803 --> 00:11:14,159
- All right, then. Why don't we go out...
- Look, departmental procedure...
116
00:11:15,556 --> 00:11:18,866
Departmental procedure says I have
got to follow through with the report.
117
00:11:19,184 --> 00:11:20,253
Don't you understand?
118
00:11:22,395 --> 00:11:24,465
Yeah, yeah, I understand.
119
00:11:25,314 --> 00:11:28,272
Look, you were the only one
on the beat at that time.
120
00:11:28,566 --> 00:11:31,126
And that girl says she spoke
to a uniformed officer...
121
00:11:31,402 --> 00:11:32,755
...and swears it was you.
122
00:11:33,570 --> 00:11:35,242
Sarge...
123
00:11:35,488 --> 00:11:38,127
...maybe it was one of those
play cops?
124
00:11:38,741 --> 00:11:42,495
Right. I mean, one of those wackos
that gets off thinking they're one of us.
125
00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:46,217
That's what I've been thinking.
It's a possibility, and if so...
126
00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:48,734
...this guy's dangerous.
127
00:11:49,166 --> 00:11:52,363
Well, look, anyway, for the record,
you guys never ride alone...
128
00:11:52,668 --> 00:11:54,738
...and they say this officer was alone.
129
00:11:55,420 --> 00:11:57,012
Wait a minute. As a matter of fact...
130
00:11:57,255 --> 00:11:59,974
Jon, we better get going.
Sarge will take care of everything.
131
00:12:00,257 --> 00:12:03,533
Right, sarge? See you later. Come on.
We gotta get going. He's busy.
132
00:12:03,844 --> 00:12:05,755
We've taken enough
of his time, come on.
133
00:12:06,012 --> 00:12:08,810
Yeah, you guys can go.
134
00:12:14,352 --> 00:12:17,389
Hey, Ponch, you really
didn't have to cover for me.
135
00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:20,865
Hey, I wasn't. I was covering for me.
136
00:12:21,149 --> 00:12:23,105
It was my emergency, remember?
137
00:12:23,776 --> 00:12:25,129
Yeah.
138
00:12:25,402 --> 00:12:28,280
I can't understand how that girl
said she could identify me.
139
00:12:28,571 --> 00:12:29,799
I wasn't even there.
140
00:12:30,364 --> 00:12:31,843
Hey, come on, Jon.
141
00:12:32,074 --> 00:12:36,590
Between the glasses, the uniform and
the helmet, the public can't tell us apart.
142
00:12:36,952 --> 00:12:39,750
You know, you've seen one,
you've seen them all.
143
00:13:31,244 --> 00:13:33,121
Pull it over.
144
00:13:47,590 --> 00:13:52,061
All right, I wanna see everybody's
license and registration, please.
145
00:13:54,262 --> 00:13:56,981
May I see your driver's license
and registration, please?
146
00:13:57,264 --> 00:14:01,223
Look, officer, I'm really sorry about this.
But this really isn't my fault, you see.
147
00:14:01,976 --> 00:14:04,570
You're going over 80,
you're weaving in and out of traffic.
148
00:14:04,853 --> 00:14:08,448
Keep that up, you'll be celebrating
a funeral instead of a wedding.
149
00:14:09,107 --> 00:14:10,586
Yes, sir.
150
00:14:10,816 --> 00:14:12,169
Will you knock it off?
151
00:14:12,401 --> 00:14:13,880
Must be the champagne.
152
00:14:14,736 --> 00:14:17,808
- Wait a minute. You've been drinking?
- Oh, no, sir, not me.
153
00:14:18,114 --> 00:14:22,426
She has, my girlfriend. I mean my wife.
Just a few glasses, that's all.
154
00:14:30,165 --> 00:14:32,599
- Thank you.
- I'm really sorry about this.
155
00:14:32,875 --> 00:14:35,389
We're just trying to get away
on our honeymoon, you see.
156
00:14:35,669 --> 00:14:37,785
These are my friends back here.
157
00:14:38,046 --> 00:14:40,606
They followed me from the party.
We're trying to get away.
158
00:14:40,881 --> 00:14:42,633
They think we're just fooling around.
159
00:14:50,514 --> 00:14:51,663
Today.
160
00:14:51,890 --> 00:14:54,848
Look, I'm sorry if I caused
any problems. My friends too.
161
00:14:55,142 --> 00:14:57,212
You know,
they just think it's funny doing this.
162
00:14:57,477 --> 00:14:59,627
Hey, it'd be funny at 55.
163
00:14:59,896 --> 00:15:01,852
Yes, sir. I'm really sorry about that.
164
00:15:02,106 --> 00:15:04,097
I was trying to outrun them.
I'm in the Navy.
165
00:15:04,358 --> 00:15:07,031
I just got a couple days' leave.
I'm trying to get away.
166
00:15:07,693 --> 00:15:10,526
- Yeah, you're on leave?
- Yes, sir.
167
00:15:11,280 --> 00:15:13,714
Okay, I'll be with you in just a minute,
all right?
168
00:15:18,994 --> 00:15:22,191
The guy probably
has a 24-hour leave too.
169
00:15:23,080 --> 00:15:25,230
- All right, where's Dorfner?
- Hey, Ponch, listen.
170
00:15:25,499 --> 00:15:27,967
Hey, partner, you're gonna
have to help me out with this.
171
00:15:28,251 --> 00:15:30,526
- It'll take an hour to write these up.
- An hour?
172
00:15:30,795 --> 00:15:33,548
- At least, yeah.
- That's just enough time.
173
00:15:34,172 --> 00:15:35,446
What are you talking about?
174
00:15:43,304 --> 00:15:45,534
I tell you what.
I give you an hour's head start...
175
00:15:45,806 --> 00:15:48,240
...on your buddies back there
and just keep it at 55.
176
00:15:48,517 --> 00:15:51,077
Consider it a present
from the California Highway Patrol.
177
00:15:51,352 --> 00:15:55,823
- Terrific.
- Thank you, officer. You're really super.
178
00:15:56,189 --> 00:15:58,339
- Thank you.
- Thank you. I really appreciate this.
179
00:15:58,608 --> 00:16:01,520
- You bet. Have a nice honeymoon.
- Thank you.
180
00:16:05,947 --> 00:16:09,417
- Hey, what happened?
- It's okay, we deliver babies too.
181
00:16:10,700 --> 00:16:12,292
They escaped.
182
00:16:44,309 --> 00:16:45,901
How's it going?
183
00:16:46,478 --> 00:16:48,230
Hey, you take this.
184
00:16:48,479 --> 00:16:50,435
Okay, Ponch.
185
00:16:52,566 --> 00:16:53,681
And this one.
186
00:16:53,900 --> 00:16:57,495
Oh, matched luggage.
Does it come in any other colors?
187
00:16:58,279 --> 00:17:00,076
Hey, I forgot my weights.
188
00:17:00,322 --> 00:17:02,472
Ponch, you'll only be here
one night, remember?
189
00:17:02,740 --> 00:17:04,731
One single night.
190
00:17:04,992 --> 00:17:08,223
Hey, I can't let my body
get flabby, can I?
191
00:17:09,079 --> 00:17:11,513
How are you gonna play with this thing
with no strings?
192
00:17:11,789 --> 00:17:13,666
I was gonna restring it while I was here.
193
00:17:13,916 --> 00:17:16,635
Yeah, okay. Here.
194
00:17:19,045 --> 00:17:20,194
Hi, Jon.
195
00:17:20,421 --> 00:17:23,254
- How are you doing, Sandy?
- Fine, thanks. I'll talk to you later.
196
00:17:23,548 --> 00:17:25,027
- Okay.
- Who's that?
197
00:17:25,258 --> 00:17:27,010
Just a neighbor.
198
00:17:30,178 --> 00:17:32,738
My hero. Perfect timing.
The bundle on the right is yours.
199
00:17:33,014 --> 00:17:34,493
Oh, thanks a lot, Alice.
200
00:17:38,268 --> 00:17:41,305
- I'll get the door, partner.
- Okay, Ponch.
201
00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:48,796
Wow, how do you do it?
Neat as a pin.
202
00:17:49,818 --> 00:17:52,332
- Hey, hi, Dana.
- Hi, Jon.
203
00:17:52,612 --> 00:17:55,365
Different lifestyles, Ponch, that's all.
204
00:17:55,656 --> 00:17:57,806
I'm sorry, Jon, I didn't realize
you had company.
205
00:17:58,075 --> 00:18:00,384
Hey, that's okay. I'm Ponch.
206
00:18:00,660 --> 00:18:02,730
I'm gonna be staying here with Jon
for a while.
207
00:18:02,995 --> 00:18:04,314
Will I be seeing a lot of you?
208
00:18:04,538 --> 00:18:07,769
I think you've seen enough all ready.
209
00:18:09,458 --> 00:18:11,653
Hey, you don't have to go.
Can't you stay?
210
00:18:11,919 --> 00:18:14,035
Oh, that's okay.
I'm losing my sun anyway.
211
00:18:14,295 --> 00:18:16,729
- I'll see you later. Thanks, Jon.
- You bet.
212
00:18:17,006 --> 00:18:18,485
- I'll talk to you later.
- Thanks.
213
00:18:18,716 --> 00:18:20,274
- Bye-bye.
- Bye.
214
00:18:21,343 --> 00:18:22,901
Who is that?
215
00:18:23,136 --> 00:18:26,128
- That is Dana.
- Dana, huh?
216
00:18:27,014 --> 00:18:28,970
Hey, come on, Jon,
you know what I mean.
217
00:18:29,224 --> 00:18:31,135
What's the story?
218
00:18:31,600 --> 00:18:33,750
She's just a stew
and she's a neighbor.
219
00:18:34,019 --> 00:18:36,408
She doesn't get any sun
on her side of the building...
220
00:18:36,688 --> 00:18:39,919
...so she comes over here and uses
the terrace whenever she wants.
221
00:18:40,232 --> 00:18:43,190
Yeah? And that laundry chick,
who's that?
222
00:18:44,986 --> 00:18:46,624
That was Alice.
223
00:18:47,029 --> 00:18:48,587
She's a legal secretary.
224
00:18:48,822 --> 00:18:50,699
I supply the quarter,
she does the wash.
225
00:18:50,949 --> 00:18:52,382
She's a good friend, that's all.
226
00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:56,351
Yeah, well, how many friends like that
you got around here, huh?
227
00:19:00,206 --> 00:19:02,276
Well, let's see.
228
00:19:03,333 --> 00:19:05,324
There's Nancy, she's upstairs
and comes down...
229
00:19:05,585 --> 00:19:07,223
...does the cooking once in a while.
230
00:19:07,461 --> 00:19:08,610
There's charlene.
231
00:19:08,837 --> 00:19:11,112
There's Mary,
she does the shopping once in a while.
232
00:19:11,381 --> 00:19:13,497
Charlene's the one
that does a little dusting.
233
00:19:13,758 --> 00:19:17,512
Yeah, well, how come you didn't tell me
about these lovelies before, partner?
234
00:19:17,844 --> 00:19:20,039
I didn't know it was important to you,
okay?
235
00:19:20,305 --> 00:19:22,535
You didn't know it was important?
236
00:19:24,891 --> 00:19:26,165
Hey, Ponch.
237
00:19:26,393 --> 00:19:28,748
Do you really have to
put all that stuff in there?
238
00:19:29,020 --> 00:19:31,136
Hey, come on.
I gotta keep this stuff fresh.
239
00:19:31,396 --> 00:19:36,106
Oh, come on, that stuff has enough
preservatives in it to last forever.
240
00:19:37,693 --> 00:19:40,969
Jon, I like the filling in my Ding Dongs
at a certain temperature.
241
00:19:41,279 --> 00:19:42,951
Yeah. So they don't get gooey, right?
242
00:19:43,197 --> 00:19:45,392
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
243
00:20:01,420 --> 00:20:03,172
No more rock at this hour.
244
00:20:07,341 --> 00:20:09,457
Oh, Ponch.
245
00:20:41,784 --> 00:20:46,016
Hey, the roommates look
a little tired this morning.
246
00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:49,950
You bet I'm tired.
I mean, like, how can a man sleep?
247
00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:51,682
Every time I doze off...
248
00:20:51,917 --> 00:20:54,351
...another beautiful lady
wanders into the apartment...
249
00:20:54,627 --> 00:20:56,026
...to see if Jon needs anything.
250
00:20:56,253 --> 00:20:59,165
I mean, like, he's been adopted
by 30 foxy ladies...
251
00:20:59,464 --> 00:21:00,943
...who tend to his every need.
252
00:21:01,174 --> 00:21:04,007
- Hey, come on. All they are is just...
- And he calls them friends.
253
00:21:04,301 --> 00:21:06,371
He's the friendliest guy
in the whole building.
254
00:21:06,636 --> 00:21:09,025
Oh, and like, the door,
it opens automatically...
255
00:21:09,305 --> 00:21:11,978
...to the sound of female breathing.
256
00:21:12,266 --> 00:21:15,338
Okay, old buddy. It's the kid's turn.
You can't believe this guy.
257
00:21:15,643 --> 00:21:17,520
Stays in my apartment,
everybody knows him.
258
00:21:17,770 --> 00:21:19,840
He snores all night,
makes this animal noises...
259
00:21:20,105 --> 00:21:22,665
...and he starts walking around
at 2:30 in the morning.
260
00:21:22,941 --> 00:21:25,171
- Hey, I get hungry.
- He gets hungry. You know what?
261
00:21:25,443 --> 00:21:27,513
He sleeps with a teddy, a little teddy.
262
00:21:27,778 --> 00:21:30,292
- I've seen him hug it.
- It's not a teddy, it's a pillow.
263
00:21:30,572 --> 00:21:31,971
Oh, it's a pillow. I tell you.
264
00:21:32,198 --> 00:21:36,077
That's the brownest, fuzziest,
wuzziest little pillow I've ever seen.
265
00:21:36,409 --> 00:21:39,242
You love it, Ponch, you love it.
266
00:21:39,537 --> 00:21:40,856
All right, all right, maybe.
267
00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:43,753
But if I had all the friends you had,
I wouldn't need it.
268
00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:47,794
Like Alice friend,
Mary friend, Jane friend, huh?
269
00:21:48,502 --> 00:21:50,413
So that's where they all end up,
huh, Jon?
270
00:21:51,629 --> 00:21:52,618
What do you mean?
271
00:21:52,839 --> 00:21:55,672
Oh, come on. I saw you
up on the Hollywood yesterday.
272
00:21:55,966 --> 00:21:58,161
Hitting up on that brunette
in the sedan.
273
00:22:00,136 --> 00:22:01,171
You saw me?
274
00:22:01,387 --> 00:22:04,026
- Yeah.
- Hey, come on, Bar, that wasn't Jon.
275
00:22:04,306 --> 00:22:07,059
So, what's the description
of this guy you saw, Baricza?
276
00:22:07,350 --> 00:22:09,910
Well, it could've been
Jon's twin brother.
277
00:22:10,185 --> 00:22:12,653
- Tall, blond hair, just like him.
- Are you positive?
278
00:22:12,938 --> 00:22:16,055
Yeah, hey, sarge, I'd recognize
that blond baton anywhere.
279
00:22:16,357 --> 00:22:18,234
It's a Baker trademark.
280
00:22:18,483 --> 00:22:21,441
Looks like our theory of a double
is right on target, fellas.
281
00:22:21,736 --> 00:22:25,524
I meant to tell you something, sarge.
Ponch and I were separated yesterday.
282
00:22:28,866 --> 00:22:30,458
I had a personal emergency.
283
00:22:31,535 --> 00:22:32,650
At what time?
284
00:22:33,495 --> 00:22:34,814
Between 10 and 10:30.
285
00:22:36,205 --> 00:22:37,479
Time of the accident.
286
00:22:38,374 --> 00:22:39,693
Sorry, sarge.
287
00:22:39,917 --> 00:22:42,715
Look, we'll all be sorry
if we don't find this character.
288
00:22:43,002 --> 00:22:45,755
Because right now I have to send
in a report to Sacramento...
289
00:22:46,046 --> 00:22:48,606
...saying that you were alone
at the time of the incident.
290
00:22:48,882 --> 00:22:52,477
What kind of turkey rides around
on a motorcycle, thinking he's a cop?
291
00:22:53,719 --> 00:22:55,357
Well, the M.O. Is usually the same.
292
00:22:55,595 --> 00:22:58,029
They think the uniform and power
that goes with it...
293
00:22:58,306 --> 00:23:00,456
...is an answer to an uneventful life.
294
00:23:00,724 --> 00:23:03,238
Guys who wanted to be cops
who couldn't make the grade...
295
00:23:03,518 --> 00:23:06,635
...usually because of twisted minds
rather than bodies.
296
00:23:06,937 --> 00:23:09,895
They're usually not out to hurt
anybody, just to play hero.
297
00:23:10,774 --> 00:23:13,368
In this case, to impress the ladies.
298
00:23:13,651 --> 00:23:16,927
The real danger is that in an
emergency situation on the freeway...
299
00:23:17,237 --> 00:23:20,627
...when people look to him for help,
he obviously can't deliver.
300
00:23:21,365 --> 00:23:26,041
Most of the time, the public can't tell
the difference between us and them.
301
00:23:26,411 --> 00:23:28,971
And of course,
that's the real problem for us.
302
00:23:29,246 --> 00:23:32,921
Now, this particular turkey
is without conscience.
303
00:23:33,249 --> 00:23:36,127
He caused a very serious accident
and left the scene.
304
00:23:36,418 --> 00:23:38,215
So we've gotta find him, and fast.
305
00:23:38,462 --> 00:23:42,580
We can't do it in here.
Let's get to briefing and get out of here.
306
00:24:02,313 --> 00:24:05,271
Hey, I'll never leave you alone again,
partner.
307
00:24:06,358 --> 00:24:07,996
Thanks.
308
00:24:11,487 --> 00:24:12,681
Hey, that's Getraer.
309
00:24:12,905 --> 00:24:15,817
Looks like he's hitting
the bricks for once.
310
00:27:19,507 --> 00:27:21,099
Mister, you're under arrest.
311
00:27:21,342 --> 00:27:23,492
Shove it, pig, just shove it.
312
00:27:48,112 --> 00:27:50,672
You could've killed somebody.
Highway is not a drag strip.
313
00:27:50,948 --> 00:27:52,427
I'm in no mood for a sermon.
314
00:27:52,657 --> 00:27:55,012
You're not, huh?
Well, you're gonna get one anyway.
315
00:27:56,660 --> 00:27:58,651
- Come here.
- Come on, he's talking to you.
316
00:27:58,912 --> 00:28:01,472
- Put your left hand on your head.
- Big deal.
317
00:28:01,748 --> 00:28:03,898
Look, you may not give
two cents for your life...
318
00:28:04,166 --> 00:28:07,078
...but there's a lot of people out there
who do care about theirs.
319
00:28:07,377 --> 00:28:09,049
Oh, that's real funny.
320
00:28:09,295 --> 00:28:11,047
Is that why you ran me off the road?
321
00:28:11,297 --> 00:28:12,855
Because you're worried about life?
322
00:28:13,757 --> 00:28:16,988
Look, that's a stolen car
and that's a felony.
323
00:28:17,301 --> 00:28:19,132
You call the shots, kid.
324
00:28:26,600 --> 00:28:28,875
You'd like that, wouldn't you?
325
00:28:32,813 --> 00:28:33,802
Hey.
326
00:28:34,356 --> 00:28:35,914
What's the matter with you?
327
00:28:36,149 --> 00:28:37,662
Is it cops?
328
00:28:37,901 --> 00:28:39,619
Or you just hate the world in general?
329
00:28:40,945 --> 00:28:42,583
What's it to you?
330
00:28:42,821 --> 00:28:44,140
You gonna arrest me?
331
00:28:44,364 --> 00:28:47,674
Or are we gonna stand around here
and play reform school all day?
332
00:28:47,992 --> 00:28:50,950
I think that's a little too late for that,
old buddy, come on.
333
00:29:12,594 --> 00:29:15,904
- Hey, how are you doing?
- Pretty good. How are you doing?
334
00:29:16,222 --> 00:29:18,099
The motor home,
almost finished with it?
335
00:29:18,348 --> 00:29:19,337
Soon as I'm done.
336
00:29:20,350 --> 00:29:24,502
Let me start all over again.
The motor home, this one, it's mine.
337
00:29:24,853 --> 00:29:26,491
When will you have it fixed?
338
00:29:28,023 --> 00:29:29,502
- This one?
- Yeah.
339
00:29:29,732 --> 00:29:31,290
We got a problem.
340
00:29:31,525 --> 00:29:33,800
I couldn't get
a replacement generator for it.
341
00:29:34,069 --> 00:29:37,220
That thing's so old,
they don't make them anymore.
342
00:29:37,530 --> 00:29:38,679
I don't know what we'll do.
343
00:29:40,657 --> 00:29:43,125
- You gotta be kidding.
- No.
344
00:29:43,910 --> 00:29:46,060
Hey, what am I gonna do?
I need it. I live in it.
345
00:29:47,079 --> 00:29:49,752
In that? You gotta be kidding.
346
00:29:50,290 --> 00:29:53,760
- Don't look like anybody could live there.
- Hey, never mind the inside.
347
00:29:54,084 --> 00:29:55,915
You're supposed to work
on the generator.
348
00:29:57,253 --> 00:30:00,051
I got a generator that's almost
like the one that burnt out.
349
00:30:00,339 --> 00:30:03,137
I'm gonna have to rewire that thing.
It'll take me another day.
350
00:30:03,425 --> 00:30:04,540
Another day?
351
00:30:05,802 --> 00:30:07,201
You live in there too?
352
00:30:07,761 --> 00:30:09,319
No, I was just curious. Thanks.
353
00:30:10,097 --> 00:30:11,371
Hey, I'll do the best I can.
354
00:30:12,223 --> 00:30:13,702
Please do, okay?
355
00:30:13,933 --> 00:30:16,401
I miss my home sweet home.
356
00:30:16,685 --> 00:30:19,358
Yeah, and I miss mine too.
357
00:30:52,087 --> 00:30:54,555
Oh, hi, Jon.
I was just using your hair dryer.
358
00:30:54,839 --> 00:30:57,353
- I blew a fuse in my apartment, okay?
- Oh, sure.
359
00:30:57,633 --> 00:30:58,827
- Great. Thanks.
- You bet.
360
00:30:59,051 --> 00:31:00,040
- Hi.
- Hi.
361
00:31:00,260 --> 00:31:01,932
- Bye.
- Bye.
362
00:31:04,472 --> 00:31:06,303
How come you didn't ask her to stay?
363
00:31:09,059 --> 00:31:11,414
Because she was finished
drying her hair.
364
00:31:12,770 --> 00:31:14,726
You should have asked her to stay
for coffee.
365
00:31:14,980 --> 00:31:17,619
I would have offered her
a Ding Dong or something.
366
00:31:23,278 --> 00:31:24,506
What's the matter?
367
00:31:26,947 --> 00:31:30,303
I don't know. Just this double-character
thing starting to get me down.
368
00:31:31,951 --> 00:31:35,341
Hey, easy, huh? You know
the whole squad is behind you.
369
00:31:37,039 --> 00:31:39,394
Yeah, I know.
370
00:31:47,005 --> 00:31:48,597
I mean, we're gonna get this dude.
371
00:31:51,174 --> 00:31:53,813
Hey, that's a promise from old Ponch
to his best buddy.
372
00:31:57,513 --> 00:32:00,232
Yeah. Thanks, Ponch.
373
00:32:00,723 --> 00:32:02,281
I just hope it happens soon.
374
00:32:04,768 --> 00:32:06,838
Hey, it will be, partner.
375
00:32:07,103 --> 00:32:08,616
It will be.
376
00:32:48,010 --> 00:32:48,999
Hello, officer.
377
00:32:49,219 --> 00:32:51,369
May I see your driver's license
and registration?
378
00:32:51,638 --> 00:32:54,596
- What did I do?
- You were doing 40 in a 35-mile zone.
379
00:32:54,890 --> 00:32:57,165
That's ridiculous.
I wasn't going over 30.
380
00:32:57,434 --> 00:33:00,471
Are you gonna give me your license
or do I have to run you in?
381
00:33:01,729 --> 00:33:03,447
All right.
382
00:33:09,943 --> 00:33:13,731
Jobina Dennings, 166 Ivy Lane.
383
00:33:14,072 --> 00:33:17,223
That's the swinging singles place
over by Eagle Street, isn't it?
384
00:33:17,533 --> 00:33:20,286
If you're going to write a ticket,
do it and get it over with.
385
00:33:21,202 --> 00:33:22,317
Hey, look here, babe.
386
00:33:22,828 --> 00:33:25,900
What do you say you just drive home,
and I'll tag along behind you?
387
00:33:26,206 --> 00:33:28,640
And then I'll stop up
for a little nightcap. And...
388
00:33:29,333 --> 00:33:32,245
How dare you?
Look, I want you to know...
389
00:33:33,461 --> 00:33:35,338
...Officer Block, I'm gonna report you.
390
00:33:35,588 --> 00:33:36,703
Oh, no, you don't.
391
00:33:36,922 --> 00:33:39,561
What are you doing?
Give me back my keys.
392
00:33:40,550 --> 00:33:42,029
Let me have those.
393
00:33:42,260 --> 00:33:44,296
What are you doing?
394
00:33:44,553 --> 00:33:46,703
I know what goes on
in the swinging single places.
395
00:33:46,972 --> 00:33:50,760
A cop who risks his life in the line of
duty isn't good enough for you, is he?
396
00:33:51,100 --> 00:33:54,172
Let me go. You're scaring...
Let me go. No.
397
00:33:54,478 --> 00:33:57,072
Are you crazy? Let me go.
What do you think you're doing?
398
00:33:59,690 --> 00:34:01,646
Not a bad movie, huh, partner?
399
00:34:01,900 --> 00:34:04,698
Yeah, Ponch, thanks.
It was a good idea.
400
00:34:04,986 --> 00:34:07,216
Hey, looks like one of our guys
is in trouble.
401
00:34:07,488 --> 00:34:09,365
Give me those keys back or...
402
00:34:12,992 --> 00:34:15,631
Let go of me.
What are you doing?
403
00:34:17,662 --> 00:34:20,222
- Hold it. We're cHPs.
- She was resisting arrest.
404
00:34:20,664 --> 00:34:22,700
- He's a liar. Let me go.
- Ma'am.
405
00:34:22,958 --> 00:34:24,596
- I won't hurt you.
- Let me go.
406
00:34:24,834 --> 00:34:26,870
- Hey, hey.
- I'm gonna report both of you.
407
00:34:27,128 --> 00:34:29,403
- You're in it together.
- Ma'am. Ma'am.
408
00:34:29,671 --> 00:34:32,265
- Let me go.
- We don't wanna hurt you, all right?
409
00:34:34,508 --> 00:34:37,341
- Don't... Let me go.
- Relax a minute, we don't want...
410
00:34:38,261 --> 00:34:41,059
All right, hold it, freeze it right there.
411
00:34:41,806 --> 00:34:43,444
Lady, step away from them.
412
00:34:47,518 --> 00:34:48,712
Okay, now what's going on?
413
00:34:49,353 --> 00:34:52,151
Their friend stopped me
and then made dirty insinuations...
414
00:34:52,439 --> 00:34:55,511
...and attacked me and these
two came along and helped him.
415
00:34:55,817 --> 00:34:59,207
Hey, listen, we're cHPs, okay?
We're gonna reach for IDs.
416
00:34:59,528 --> 00:35:01,120
You do it very slowly.
417
00:35:12,413 --> 00:35:15,132
We were assisting another officer and...
418
00:35:16,583 --> 00:35:18,221
Where did he go?
419
00:35:22,337 --> 00:35:24,009
Hey, he split.
420
00:35:24,797 --> 00:35:28,073
He's a phony officer. Haven't you
heard about the phony CHP officer?
421
00:35:28,383 --> 00:35:31,534
Yeah, the phony.
We had a teletype in briefing. Yeah.
422
00:35:33,012 --> 00:35:34,365
You mean...
423
00:35:34,596 --> 00:35:35,949
...he wasn't a real cop?
424
00:35:36,890 --> 00:35:41,327
- Well, listen, we're gonna have to...
- Please, I just wanna go home.
425
00:35:41,685 --> 00:35:44,597
I don't... I can't take any more of this.
426
00:35:45,021 --> 00:35:47,660
We don't blame you,
after what that jerk put you through...
427
00:35:47,940 --> 00:35:49,817
...and us coming along
and making it worse.
428
00:35:50,067 --> 00:35:52,376
Just relax and everything will be fine.
Hey...
429
00:35:52,652 --> 00:35:54,370
You look like him.
430
00:35:55,362 --> 00:35:56,636
What?
431
00:35:57,781 --> 00:35:59,692
You look like him.
432
00:36:02,284 --> 00:36:03,319
Yeah, I know.
433
00:36:03,911 --> 00:36:05,503
I gotta write a report on this.
434
00:36:06,329 --> 00:36:10,686
My partner's really good with reports
so he'll give you a hand, right, partner?
435
00:36:11,333 --> 00:36:13,210
Yeah, thanks, Ponch.
436
00:36:15,420 --> 00:36:18,935
Listen, we're really sorry. Really, now.
437
00:36:19,881 --> 00:36:22,714
I just think I'm too shaky
to drive home.
438
00:36:23,009 --> 00:36:25,284
We'll be glad to drive you home.
439
00:36:26,345 --> 00:36:27,494
Hey.
440
00:36:27,721 --> 00:36:30,281
I mean that as innocent as it sounds.
441
00:36:32,558 --> 00:36:34,071
Please.
442
00:36:34,518 --> 00:36:35,553
Thanks.
443
00:36:35,769 --> 00:36:37,327
All right. Come on.
444
00:37:01,121 --> 00:37:02,998
Why me?
445
00:37:26,891 --> 00:37:28,119
What's the matter?
446
00:37:28,351 --> 00:37:29,989
Power go off?
447
00:37:30,311 --> 00:37:32,871
Hey, you are off, all right?
448
00:37:33,146 --> 00:37:36,582
You're not only a danger to yourself,
you're a danger to my peace of mind.
449
00:37:37,691 --> 00:37:41,320
Because of a little music?
Come on, it's too quiet around here.
450
00:37:41,653 --> 00:37:43,769
No sounds, no beat.
451
00:37:44,029 --> 00:37:47,578
Put a seashell up to your ear and listen
to the beat of the seashore, okay?
452
00:37:47,907 --> 00:37:49,738
I mean, I don't wanna
share it with you.
453
00:37:54,329 --> 00:37:57,844
I don't know. Maybe nothing's wrong
with you. All this stuff...
454
00:38:00,167 --> 00:38:03,239
I don't... Maybe I'm crazy. I don't know.
455
00:38:09,299 --> 00:38:12,211
I just wonder how much a new
motor home for you is gonna cost.
456
00:38:21,975 --> 00:38:23,044
Who is it?
457
00:38:23,560 --> 00:38:25,278
It's Jon.
458
00:38:27,063 --> 00:38:29,418
- Oh, Jon, hi.
- Hi.
459
00:38:30,273 --> 00:38:31,501
Listen.
460
00:38:31,733 --> 00:38:34,293
I'm sorry, can I borrow your couch
for the night?
461
00:38:35,235 --> 00:38:37,430
Sure, come on in.
462
00:38:48,246 --> 00:38:49,565
What is with you, you turkey?
463
00:38:49,788 --> 00:38:52,348
Driving a monster like this
doesn't give you right of way.
464
00:38:52,624 --> 00:38:56,333
Well, maybe the signal broke, but
I'm big enough for you to see, stupid.
465
00:38:56,669 --> 00:38:59,502
Oh, yeah? I got better things
to look for than dummies like you.
466
00:38:59,796 --> 00:39:04,153
If you want to test your bumper, why
don't you just drive into a brick wall?
467
00:39:04,508 --> 00:39:07,227
At least a brick wall's
got more brains than you.
468
00:39:07,510 --> 00:39:10,820
Brains! You do not know
the meaning of the word "brains. "
469
00:39:11,138 --> 00:39:14,096
You realize you're blocking
half the city street with...
470
00:39:14,391 --> 00:39:17,224
Well, if you'd watch
where you were going...!
471
00:39:17,518 --> 00:39:19,395
- Watch where I was going?
- That little car...
472
00:39:19,645 --> 00:39:23,558
- You talk about brains, fellow.
- It's a big locomotive, how can you hit it?
473
00:39:23,898 --> 00:39:27,095
- You can't even see, can you?
- Oh, I can.
474
00:39:32,780 --> 00:39:35,897
- I am going to teach you a lesson.
- LA 15...
475
00:39:36,199 --> 00:39:39,828
I am going to teach you a lesson
because I can take it.
476
00:39:40,160 --> 00:39:42,116
Calm down, all right?
477
00:39:43,121 --> 00:39:46,431
It doesn't look like anybody's injured.
No use getting injured by fighting.
478
00:39:46,749 --> 00:39:50,059
- All right.
- Need an 11-84 for assistance.
479
00:40:27,572 --> 00:40:30,370
Do me a favor, will you?
Put out an APB on his brain.
480
00:40:30,658 --> 00:40:33,377
Hey, how about doing me a favor, okay?
You guys finished?
481
00:40:34,661 --> 00:40:37,221
Get a load of the size of that thing.
482
00:40:37,496 --> 00:40:39,134
Must be a heck of a thing to drive?
483
00:40:41,166 --> 00:40:44,044
We gotta get this traffic cleared up.
So can you move it?
484
00:40:45,669 --> 00:40:47,625
- Nope.
- What do you mean?
485
00:40:48,213 --> 00:40:50,647
I'm not moving
until all the paperwork's filled out.
486
00:40:51,132 --> 00:40:53,248
Hey. Want it moved?
487
00:40:56,219 --> 00:40:57,811
Move it yourself.
488
00:41:03,808 --> 00:41:05,719
I'll make a deal with you.
489
00:41:07,478 --> 00:41:10,311
We'll both move the engine. Deal?
490
00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:14,271
Well, maybe.
491
00:41:29,620 --> 00:41:32,418
Hey, beauty, what's happening?
492
00:41:43,922 --> 00:41:45,958
How many horsepower has she got?
493
00:41:46,216 --> 00:41:49,049
- Thirty-six hundred. Yup.
- Thirty-six hundred?
494
00:41:51,387 --> 00:41:53,855
You wanna try it?
495
00:41:55,223 --> 00:41:58,659
No, I mean, I don't know how.
I mean, I couldn't.
496
00:41:58,976 --> 00:42:01,092
It's your last chance.
497
00:42:01,353 --> 00:42:04,151
- Well, no, I mean, like, I'm in uniform...
- Yeah.
498
00:42:04,438 --> 00:42:07,077
And everything, I couldn't...
499
00:42:21,576 --> 00:42:22,895
Hey, Jon.
500
00:42:47,430 --> 00:42:50,308
- He's mine, baby.
- Not until I'm finished with him.
501
00:44:31,343 --> 00:44:33,254
He's even better-looking than you are.
502
00:44:34,387 --> 00:44:36,059
Wait a minute.
503
00:44:36,347 --> 00:44:37,780
Are you guys really cops?
504
00:44:38,724 --> 00:44:40,123
Yeah.
505
00:44:40,517 --> 00:44:42,508
We're really cops.
506
00:44:44,186 --> 00:44:46,654
Except that it comes from the inside...
507
00:44:47,480 --> 00:44:48,959
...not from what you're wearing.
508
00:45:17,045 --> 00:45:19,081
- Hey, yeah?
- How are you doing?
509
00:45:19,338 --> 00:45:20,817
Okay, how are you doing?
510
00:45:21,173 --> 00:45:24,643
Now wait a minute, wait a minute,
let's not go to through that again.
511
00:45:25,260 --> 00:45:28,058
I'm the cop who owns the problem
you're working on.
512
00:45:28,345 --> 00:45:30,575
Oh, this one? Well, it's okay, I guess.
513
00:45:32,765 --> 00:45:34,756
Well, is that just a guess?
514
00:45:35,017 --> 00:45:40,171
You see, I got the generator hooked up
but I can't get the dumb thing to work.
515
00:45:41,022 --> 00:45:45,254
Hey, wait a minute. You said
you'd have that thing fixed today.
516
00:45:45,609 --> 00:45:48,567
Hey, I'm sorry, guys,
I'm gonna need more time.
517
00:45:50,696 --> 00:45:52,209
Here, Ponch.
518
00:45:53,781 --> 00:45:54,770
What are you doing?
519
00:45:54,991 --> 00:45:57,824
You can have my apartment, my stereo,
my car, everything.
520
00:45:58,243 --> 00:45:59,232
What?
521
00:45:59,453 --> 00:46:03,651
Yeah, you can have Cerie, Roni,
Sandy, Charlene, Alice, all of them.
522
00:46:05,082 --> 00:46:06,151
What are you gonna do?
523
00:46:07,000 --> 00:46:09,673
I'm gonna stay right here.
524
00:46:09,723 --> 00:46:14,273
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