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1
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FITZ: Lots of guys will end up deadon a slab in a low-rent morgue,
2
00:00:09,805 --> 00:00:13,874
but once in a lifetime someonespecial comes along.
3
00:00:16,578 --> 00:00:21,514
Unique, epic, awe-inspiring.
4
00:00:21,515 --> 00:00:26,252
I'm talking abouta dying breed.
5
00:00:26,253 --> 00:00:31,057
A real live, guns blazing,bloody-knuckled goddamn hero.
6
00:00:31,058 --> 00:00:35,093
Everybody dies,
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00:00:35,094 --> 00:00:39,498
but it took a guy with a set ofstones like Richard Fitzpatrick
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to show you how to live.
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Make no bones about it.
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Fitz was a fucking legend.
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Hell, I get more pussy when I'm dead
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00:00:50,809 --> 00:00:53,210
than most guys get when they're alive.
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00:00:53,211 --> 00:00:55,446
LARRY: I don't think
that's appropriate.
14
00:00:55,447 --> 00:00:58,750
Way to kill the mood, asshole!
15
00:00:58,751 --> 00:01:01,586
We shouldn't even be writing
an obituary at all, Richard.
16
00:01:01,587 --> 00:01:03,688
We should be fighting to live!
17
00:01:03,689 --> 00:01:04,789
Who gives a shit, Larry?
18
00:01:04,790 --> 00:01:06,857
I'm going to be dead by the--
19
00:01:06,858 --> 00:01:08,057
When am I going to be dead?
20
00:01:08,058 --> 00:01:09,726
The beaver moon!
21
00:01:09,727 --> 00:01:11,862
Oh, God, you sound
like a broken record.
22
00:01:11,863 --> 00:01:13,463
We've still got another 72 hours,
23
00:01:13,464 --> 00:01:14,598
and you know,
your death isn't a sure thing.
24
00:01:14,599 --> 00:01:16,966
And the record plays on.
25
00:01:16,967 --> 00:01:19,102
Suicidal tendencies are a sign
of low self-esteem.
26
00:01:19,103 --> 00:01:21,104
You need to realize
that people value you,
27
00:01:21,105 --> 00:01:23,706
and I will show you
that you are a good person!
28
00:01:23,707 --> 00:01:25,040
Fuck good!
29
00:01:25,041 --> 00:01:27,142
Nice guys finish last,
and do you know why?
30
00:01:27,143 --> 00:01:29,879
Uh, yeah, because they're so
busy being nice.
31
00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:31,847
Because they're pussies.
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00:01:31,848 --> 00:01:34,216
Heroes burn out in a blaze of glory,
33
00:01:34,217 --> 00:01:35,785
and I'm going to get mine.
34
00:01:35,786 --> 00:01:38,853
Now, where was I?
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00:01:41,323 --> 00:01:44,426
(Moaning)
36
00:01:46,686 --> 00:01:55,001
Sync & corrected by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
37
00:01:55,002 --> 00:01:58,505
Without you
38
00:01:58,506 --> 00:02:01,174
I'd find my smile
39
00:02:01,175 --> 00:02:03,944
Without you
40
00:02:03,945 --> 00:02:06,447
I'd have won by a mile
41
00:02:06,448 --> 00:02:08,849
Without you
42
00:02:14,555 --> 00:02:18,123
I'm half a man
43
00:02:18,124 --> 00:02:23,395
Without you
44
00:02:23,396 --> 00:02:29,033
Without you
45
00:02:29,034 --> 00:02:31,803
Without you
46
00:02:33,138 --> 00:02:35,774
(Sniffling)
47
00:02:39,979 --> 00:02:41,913
I feel like an orphan, man!
48
00:02:41,914 --> 00:02:44,414
Like an orphan who lost a brother.
49
00:02:44,415 --> 00:02:45,749
What the fuck is wrong with you?
50
00:02:45,750 --> 00:02:46,917
There's so many things
I wanted to tell you.
51
00:02:46,918 --> 00:02:48,185
So many things to say!
52
00:02:48,186 --> 00:02:49,887
Oh, God!
53
00:02:49,888 --> 00:02:52,055
Fitzy?
54
00:02:52,056 --> 00:02:53,457
Larry said he was writing
your obituary.
55
00:02:53,458 --> 00:02:55,225
That doesn't mean I'm fucking dead!
56
00:02:55,226 --> 00:02:56,226
(Slapping)
57
00:02:56,227 --> 00:02:57,761
Oh, what the fuck?
58
00:02:57,762 --> 00:03:00,062
Oh, you're so solid for a ghost!
59
00:03:00,063 --> 00:03:01,965
And warm!
60
00:03:01,966 --> 00:03:03,232
Go walk through that wall.
61
00:03:03,233 --> 00:03:05,502
How about I walk my fucking fist
through your face?
62
00:03:05,503 --> 00:03:08,638
Still got that old Fitzy
sense of humour, eh?
63
00:03:08,639 --> 00:03:11,073
So, what is it?
64
00:03:11,074 --> 00:03:12,274
Is some unfinished business
65
00:03:12,275 --> 00:03:13,376
keeping you chained to the earth?
66
00:03:13,377 --> 00:03:14,343
Like, "Ahh!"
67
00:03:14,344 --> 00:03:15,911
You know what?
68
00:03:15,912 --> 00:03:18,079
Sure, I'm a ghost and I have
ununfinished business.
69
00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:21,783
Look, what I need is a blaze of
glory worthy of the Fitz name.
70
00:03:21,784 --> 00:03:25,153
What I need is to go out with a bang.
71
00:03:25,154 --> 00:03:26,688
(Snapping fingers) Got it.
72
00:03:26,689 --> 00:03:28,590
I got a whole box here full
of Fitz awesomeness.
73
00:03:28,591 --> 00:03:30,425
Check it out.
74
00:03:30,426 --> 00:03:33,360
Some acid, a full set of teeth.
75
00:03:33,361 --> 00:03:35,863
First paycheque.
76
00:03:35,864 --> 00:03:38,833
Oh, yeah!
77
00:03:38,834 --> 00:03:40,902
You, me and old Mrs. Mulroney.
78
00:03:40,903 --> 00:03:43,470
Mrs. Mulroney?
79
00:03:43,471 --> 00:03:44,872
Now that was a fucking dream car.
80
00:03:44,873 --> 00:03:46,507
Yeah, until some asshole stole her.
81
00:03:46,508 --> 00:03:48,441
Eleventh grade.
82
00:03:48,442 --> 00:03:51,044
I was going to beat Kyle Coxwell's
83
00:03:51,045 --> 00:03:52,612
cross-county speed record.
84
00:03:52,613 --> 00:03:55,916
Commercial Drive to Walker's
Point in 14:28.
85
00:03:55,917 --> 00:03:57,417
Wonder what ever happened to Kyle?
86
00:03:57,418 --> 00:03:58,718
Fuck Kyle.
87
00:03:58,719 --> 00:03:59,753
Yeah, fuck Kyle.
88
00:03:59,754 --> 00:04:01,287
That record was going to be all mine.
89
00:04:01,288 --> 00:04:02,888
It still can be!
90
00:04:02,889 --> 00:04:04,056
Josh, you're a fucking genius!
91
00:04:04,057 --> 00:04:07,225
The doctors did tell mom
I was special.
92
00:04:07,226 --> 00:04:09,294
Hey, is Casper as friendly
as they say?
93
00:04:11,531 --> 00:04:14,900
Mr. Fitzpatrick,
I hate to disturb you.
94
00:04:14,901 --> 00:04:16,936
I can see you're a busy man.
95
00:04:16,937 --> 00:04:18,203
If you hated to disturb me,
96
00:04:18,204 --> 00:04:19,671
then you wouldn't fucking do it,
would you?
97
00:04:19,672 --> 00:04:21,739
Come on, babe.
98
00:04:21,740 --> 00:04:23,441
Shake it like you mean it!
99
00:04:23,442 --> 00:04:28,212
The thing is, I'm doing a little
research on your son.
100
00:04:28,213 --> 00:04:30,548
Oh, maybe you can find out
why he's such a fuck-knuckle.
101
00:04:30,549 --> 00:04:33,084
Mm-hmm, yeah,
but I was wondering,
102
00:04:33,085 --> 00:04:37,120
do you remember, has he ever
done anything nice?
103
00:04:37,121 --> 00:04:39,723
Do I look like I have any time
for jokes, kid?
104
00:04:39,724 --> 00:04:41,558
Oh, I know Richie.
105
00:04:41,559 --> 00:04:43,293
There was one time I had
an infected uvula,
106
00:04:43,294 --> 00:04:44,962
and couldn't do anything oral.
107
00:04:44,963 --> 00:04:47,430
So, he let me give him
a foot job, same price.
108
00:04:47,431 --> 00:04:50,600
Now that is a gentleman.
109
00:04:50,601 --> 00:04:52,201
Foot job?
You do those?
110
00:04:52,202 --> 00:04:53,636
Mm-hmm!
111
00:04:53,637 --> 00:04:56,038
Take off your pants, sailor!
112
00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:05,014
KEN: Come on, fuck me
like you owe me money!
113
00:05:05,015 --> 00:05:06,582
(Phone ringing)
114
00:05:09,619 --> 00:05:11,052
JOSH:
There she is.
115
00:05:11,053 --> 00:05:13,855
Told you Kasip could find her.
116
00:05:13,856 --> 00:05:18,426
FITZ: Oh, Mrs.
Mulroney, what have they done to you?
117
00:05:18,427 --> 00:05:21,295
JOSH: "Namaste," it means "I
recognize the divinity in you."
118
00:05:21,296 --> 00:05:23,430
Might as well drive a tampon.
119
00:05:23,431 --> 00:05:25,532
Can I kill whoever did this?
120
00:05:25,533 --> 00:05:27,234
No, no one's killing anyone, Josh.
121
00:05:27,235 --> 00:05:28,736
I just want my car back.
122
00:05:28,737 --> 00:05:31,805
Got your back, bro!
123
00:05:33,942 --> 00:05:35,275
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
124
00:05:35,276 --> 00:05:37,111
You don't want to drive
sitting on broken glass.
125
00:05:37,112 --> 00:05:38,711
You'll cut your bum!
126
00:05:38,712 --> 00:05:40,113
Yeah, good point.
127
00:05:40,114 --> 00:05:43,850
Yeah, hey?
128
00:05:43,851 --> 00:05:46,585
(Glass shattering)
129
00:05:46,586 --> 00:05:48,755
Fucking baby seat!
130
00:05:48,756 --> 00:05:49,989
Punt!
131
00:05:49,990 --> 00:05:51,124
All right, let's go, Fitzy!
132
00:05:51,125 --> 00:05:52,659
I'm taking her back!
133
00:05:57,697 --> 00:05:58,764
(Motor revving)
134
00:05:58,765 --> 00:06:00,832
Oh, yeah!
135
00:06:08,708 --> 00:06:10,042
Meghan, wait, wait!
136
00:06:10,043 --> 00:06:11,709
I'm trying to track down a good deed
137
00:06:11,710 --> 00:06:12,910
your brother may have done for you
138
00:06:12,911 --> 00:06:14,845
for his obituary.
139
00:06:14,846 --> 00:06:17,882
Dick has never done anything
nice for me.
140
00:06:17,883 --> 00:06:18,883
You know, one time
he even killed my cat!
141
00:06:18,884 --> 00:06:20,484
Anything at all!
142
00:06:20,485 --> 00:06:21,652
Maybe he taught you
an important life lesson
143
00:06:21,653 --> 00:06:22,687
when you were kids?
144
00:06:22,688 --> 00:06:24,488
His name was Orange Cat.
145
00:06:24,489 --> 00:06:26,356
I was 6 years old.
146
00:06:26,357 --> 00:06:28,992
I came home one day from school
and he was gone,
147
00:06:28,993 --> 00:06:30,660
and Dick told me
that he went to L.A.
148
00:06:30,661 --> 00:06:32,028
to star in cat food commercials.
149
00:06:32,029 --> 00:06:34,263
So, one day I brought a can
of cat food to school,
150
00:06:34,264 --> 00:06:35,932
you know, for show and tell?
151
00:06:35,933 --> 00:06:37,366
And I said, "This is my cat!"
152
00:06:37,367 --> 00:06:40,036
This is Orange Cat!
And he's a star!"
153
00:06:40,037 --> 00:06:44,840
And they all laughed,
even the teacher.
154
00:06:44,841 --> 00:06:48,143
I'm sorry for your loss.
155
00:06:48,144 --> 00:06:49,544
Dick, Dick, Dick.
156
00:06:49,545 --> 00:06:52,815
The only thing he ever thinks
about is himself!
157
00:06:52,816 --> 00:06:54,950
Maybe that's what I need to do.
158
00:06:54,951 --> 00:06:56,384
You know, like Dick's got his thing.
159
00:06:56,385 --> 00:06:58,053
Being an asshole cat-killer.
160
00:06:58,054 --> 00:06:59,921
Maybe I need to find my thing.
161
00:06:59,922 --> 00:07:02,056
You mean, like h hobby?
162
00:07:02,057 --> 00:07:05,226
Yeah, a life's purpose!
163
00:07:05,227 --> 00:07:06,393
Thank you, Larry!
164
00:07:10,132 --> 00:07:11,933
So, nothing at all then?
165
00:07:11,934 --> 00:07:15,335
Meghan?
166
00:07:15,336 --> 00:07:18,171
Can you restore her
to her former glory?
167
00:07:18,172 --> 00:07:19,973
Fuck yeah!
168
00:07:19,974 --> 00:07:21,441
In a day?
169
00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:22,743
Fuck maybe.
170
00:07:22,744 --> 00:07:24,010
LARRY:
Where have you been?
171
00:07:24,011 --> 00:07:25,045
Out stealing cars, Mom.
172
00:07:25,046 --> 00:07:28,815
You can see dead people too?
173
00:07:28,816 --> 00:07:30,483
I thought I was the only one
with the fifth sense.
174
00:07:30,484 --> 00:07:32,184
I thought we went over this, Josh.
175
00:07:32,185 --> 00:07:33,518
Wow!
176
00:07:33,519 --> 00:07:35,254
I came here to ask Josh
about your good attributes,
177
00:07:35,255 --> 00:07:38,224
only to find out that you've
been out stealing this vehicle?
178
00:07:38,225 --> 00:07:40,359
It was mine first!
179
00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:42,161
Josh is going to fix it up real nice
180
00:07:42,162 --> 00:07:44,096
so I can beat Kyle Cock-socket's
speed record.
181
00:07:44,097 --> 00:07:45,931
Kyle Coxwell?
182
00:07:45,932 --> 00:07:47,799
Didn't he race Dead Man's Curve
to set that record?
183
00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:49,467
That's Dead Person's Curve now.
184
00:07:49,468 --> 00:07:51,136
Long story.
185
00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:53,671
This dyke wiped out
on her Harley and...
186
00:07:53,672 --> 00:07:55,673
It's actually kind of
a short story, Josh.
187
00:07:55,674 --> 00:07:57,207
And what are you, the story police?
188
00:07:57,208 --> 00:07:59,009
That doesn't exist.
189
00:07:59,010 --> 00:08:00,911
Kyle nearly died setting that record.
190
00:08:00,912 --> 00:08:02,412
So?
191
00:08:02,413 --> 00:08:03,847
I'll either beat his record,
or die like James Dean.
192
00:08:03,848 --> 00:08:04,748
Either way, I'm a fucking legend!
193
00:08:04,749 --> 00:08:05,783
Yeah!
194
00:08:05,784 --> 00:08:07,184
Then, I guess I have no choice.
195
00:08:07,185 --> 00:08:08,852
Bingo, Larry!
196
00:08:08,853 --> 00:08:10,053
You don't have a choice!
197
00:08:10,054 --> 00:08:11,288
Josh, tell him what he's won!
198
00:08:11,289 --> 00:08:12,855
Well, Fitz, looks like
he's won a big old bag
199
00:08:12,856 --> 00:08:16,392
of "Fuck off, Larry!"
200
00:08:16,393 --> 00:08:17,626
I will go to the police.
201
00:08:17,627 --> 00:08:19,561
You haven't got the balls!
202
00:08:19,562 --> 00:08:23,499
I have got sizable balls, mister!
203
00:08:23,500 --> 00:08:26,535
Don't worry, boss.
I got this.
204
00:08:26,536 --> 00:08:27,736
It's go time, little man.
205
00:08:27,737 --> 00:08:29,404
Okay, okay, fine!
206
00:08:29,405 --> 00:08:31,406
Look, I'll make you a deal.
207
00:08:31,407 --> 00:08:33,809
If I can find proof of even one
good deed that you're done
208
00:08:33,810 --> 00:08:35,811
by the end of tomorrow,
you don't race.
209
00:08:35,812 --> 00:08:37,512
Really?
210
00:08:37,513 --> 00:08:39,181
(Laughing)
211
00:08:39,182 --> 00:08:40,816
Fill your boots, little man.
212
00:08:40,817 --> 00:08:42,317
But until then,
you leave me the fuck alone!
213
00:08:42,318 --> 00:08:45,752
Deal!
214
00:08:45,753 --> 00:08:47,822
Ahh!
215
00:08:54,095 --> 00:08:56,596
Hello, hello, hi!
216
00:08:56,597 --> 00:08:58,465
Will you go away, gangly one?
217
00:08:58,466 --> 00:08:59,934
I am not in the mood
for your chicanery.
218
00:08:59,935 --> 00:09:02,135
Did you stop think for a moment
that I might be?
219
00:09:02,136 --> 00:09:03,669
Are you?
220
00:09:03,670 --> 00:09:04,938
Of course not!
221
00:09:04,939 --> 00:09:06,472
Be nice if you asked.
222
00:09:06,473 --> 00:09:09,075
Guys, uh, listen,
I've just got a quick question
223
00:09:09,076 --> 00:09:11,344
which I'm fairly certain
I know the answer to.
224
00:09:11,345 --> 00:09:15,381
But in the spirit of digging
deep and male camaraderie,
225
00:09:15,382 --> 00:09:20,152
has Richard ever done anything
nice for you?
226
00:09:20,153 --> 00:09:22,254
Now is not the time for jokes.
227
00:09:22,255 --> 00:09:24,723
I'm not joking!
I'm desperate!
228
00:09:24,724 --> 00:09:26,825
He's going to try to break
the county speed record.
229
00:09:26,826 --> 00:09:29,161
Does he really think he can beat
230
00:09:29,162 --> 00:09:32,664
Kyle Coxwell's point-to-point
run of 14:28?
231
00:09:32,665 --> 00:09:34,698
Such ego!
232
00:09:34,699 --> 00:09:36,700
I know of only one other man
with an ego that big.
233
00:09:39,037 --> 00:09:40,972
Look, if he gets the parts he
needs to fix that old car,
234
00:09:40,973 --> 00:09:43,174
taking Dead Person's Curve
at that speed?
235
00:09:43,175 --> 00:09:44,641
That is a suicide mission!
236
00:09:44,642 --> 00:09:46,477
He means to take his own life?
237
00:09:46,478 --> 00:09:49,179
Please, please, if there's
anything, anything at all!
238
00:09:49,180 --> 00:09:51,748
Has he ever shown you
any act of kindness,
239
00:09:51,749 --> 00:09:53,816
or anything that made you happy?
240
00:09:53,817 --> 00:09:55,285
You know what would make us happy?
241
00:09:55,286 --> 00:09:56,286
If he were dead.
242
00:09:56,287 --> 00:09:57,354
Yes!
243
00:10:00,057 --> 00:10:02,025
You know what this means?
244
00:10:02,026 --> 00:10:04,394
That twisted party
will divide us no more!
245
00:10:04,395 --> 00:10:07,196
Our mutual hatred
for all things Fitzpatrick
246
00:10:07,197 --> 00:10:09,831
has brought us back together!
247
00:10:09,832 --> 00:10:11,901
Oh, cousin!
248
00:10:16,072 --> 00:10:18,107
(Music playing)
249
00:10:18,108 --> 00:10:21,175
Some of usare trying to work!
250
00:10:26,815 --> 00:10:28,917
So, which way are you going
to go with this?
251
00:10:28,918 --> 00:10:29,817
I'm sorry?
252
00:10:29,818 --> 00:10:31,485
The speech.
253
00:10:31,486 --> 00:10:34,355
You know, the blah-blah,
who gives a fuck blah speech?
254
00:10:34,356 --> 00:10:37,224
The one where you remind me
that I just beat cancer,
255
00:10:37,225 --> 00:10:41,361
I got a new kid on the way and
it's time to pull up my socks.
256
00:10:41,362 --> 00:10:45,032
This isn't my first go-round
on the crazy train, honey.
257
00:10:45,033 --> 00:10:48,068
Oh, I have a speech,
but that's not it.
258
00:10:48,069 --> 00:10:51,405
This is a business arrangement,
and I'm fine with that.
259
00:10:51,406 --> 00:10:53,872
You got what you wanted,
260
00:10:53,873 --> 00:10:56,008
and now, it's time
to discuss what I want.
261
00:10:56,009 --> 00:10:58,444
You got what you want.
262
00:10:58,445 --> 00:11:01,347
You played a short game to try
and get even with my son.
263
00:11:01,348 --> 00:11:04,750
But me, I'm long haul.
264
00:11:04,751 --> 00:11:07,119
I play for keeps,
265
00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:09,354
and you and I both know that
you're not going anywhere
266
00:11:09,355 --> 00:11:11,289
with a bun in your oven.
267
00:11:14,493 --> 00:11:16,561
Hey, you know what a foot job is?
268
00:11:23,469 --> 00:11:25,302
(Radio playing)
269
00:11:25,303 --> 00:11:26,870
Yodel-ay, mother-fucker!
270
00:11:26,871 --> 00:11:29,340
What, you been out
271
00:11:29,341 --> 00:11:30,975
square-dancing all night,
asshole?
272
00:11:30,976 --> 00:11:34,445
Fuck, is it time?
273
00:11:34,446 --> 00:11:36,280
Well, prep work's done, dude.
274
00:11:36,281 --> 00:11:38,382
I don't know how, though.
275
00:11:38,383 --> 00:11:40,584
It's like the car elves visited
last night,
276
00:11:40,585 --> 00:11:41,817
and did all my work for me.
277
00:11:41,818 --> 00:11:43,519
Thank you, car elves!
278
00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:45,188
You are honest and just!
279
00:11:45,189 --> 00:11:46,322
Josh, stay with me!
280
00:11:46,323 --> 00:11:49,492
How we doing
on Mrs. Mulroney?
281
00:11:49,493 --> 00:11:51,094
440 Magnum, check.
282
00:11:51,095 --> 00:11:52,928
Her shifter, check.
283
00:11:52,929 --> 00:11:54,964
Dana-60, posi-track rear-end,
check.
284
00:11:54,965 --> 00:11:57,232
When I say "check",
it means I don't have them.
285
00:11:57,233 --> 00:11:59,067
What the fuck is wrong with you?
286
00:11:59,068 --> 00:12:00,668
Fitz, I need parts.
287
00:12:00,669 --> 00:12:02,070
Custom, vintage shit!
288
00:12:02,071 --> 00:12:03,738
You know how long it takes
to order them?
289
00:12:03,739 --> 00:12:06,308
Longer than it takes to steal
them from the Ruptals?
290
00:12:06,309 --> 00:12:08,243
Hmm.
291
00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:11,046
What the fuck?
292
00:12:15,850 --> 00:12:17,118
Tire spikes?
293
00:12:17,119 --> 00:12:19,520
Got to stay two steps ahead, bro.
294
00:12:19,521 --> 00:12:21,088
Trust me, you don't want
to feel the warm slap
295
00:12:21,089 --> 00:12:22,789
of human entrails on your face,
296
00:12:22,790 --> 00:12:24,858
and then realize you don't
have an exit strategy.
297
00:12:24,859 --> 00:12:26,027
What the fuck is this?
298
00:12:26,028 --> 00:12:29,695
Ah, this is for special occasions.
299
00:12:29,696 --> 00:12:30,997
I've been waiting weeks
to use this again.
300
00:12:30,998 --> 00:12:33,933
Yeah, maybe we should huddle up
and talk strategy?
301
00:12:33,934 --> 00:12:36,336
No, no, no.
No time.
302
00:12:36,337 --> 00:12:37,737
Synchronize watches.
303
00:12:37,738 --> 00:12:40,473
Commence Operation:
Steal Their Shit.
304
00:12:40,474 --> 00:12:43,476
It's going to be awesome!
305
00:12:49,416 --> 00:12:52,651
Holy fuck!
306
00:12:52,652 --> 00:12:53,552
It's everything we need for the car!
307
00:12:53,553 --> 00:12:55,620
Mother-fucker!
308
00:13:06,131 --> 00:13:07,565
(Police sirens)
309
00:13:07,566 --> 00:13:08,766
Cops, cops, cops!
310
00:13:08,767 --> 00:13:10,568
Hide the car!
311
00:13:10,569 --> 00:13:12,636
Priorities, dude!
312
00:13:12,637 --> 00:13:15,639
(Sirens)
313
00:13:21,379 --> 00:13:24,114
(Hammering)
314
00:13:24,115 --> 00:13:25,982
Got you right where I want you, Fitz.
315
00:13:25,983 --> 00:13:27,284
This doesn't look like your bedroom!
316
00:13:27,285 --> 00:13:29,752
Stolen car.
317
00:13:29,753 --> 00:13:31,154
No witnesses,
318
00:13:31,155 --> 00:13:34,022
except someone left an envelope
full of cash at the scene,
319
00:13:34,023 --> 00:13:36,092
with your business card attached.
320
00:13:36,093 --> 00:13:38,961
Stupid fuck!
321
00:13:38,962 --> 00:13:40,162
What, I didn't do anything!
322
00:13:40,163 --> 00:13:41,863
No, Larry!
323
00:13:41,864 --> 00:13:44,066
Is there any way I could entice you
324
00:13:44,067 --> 00:13:46,001
to overlook this slight oversight?
325
00:13:46,002 --> 00:13:47,936
Oh, I'm not going to arrest you.
326
00:13:47,937 --> 00:13:50,071
I never saw a thing.
327
00:13:50,072 --> 00:13:52,107
Well, that was easy.
328
00:13:52,108 --> 00:13:55,243
Arresting you might make my month,
329
00:13:55,244 --> 00:13:57,812
but watching you die in a car wreck,
330
00:13:57,813 --> 00:13:59,481
that'll make my year.
331
00:14:04,587 --> 00:14:06,052
That's it,
I'm going to kill that fuck.
332
00:14:06,053 --> 00:14:07,087
Oh, really?
333
00:14:07,088 --> 00:14:08,388
You get to kill Larry,
334
00:14:08,389 --> 00:14:09,356
but I can't kill the guy
who messed up the car?
335
00:14:09,357 --> 00:14:11,425
Double standard, much?
336
00:14:17,064 --> 00:14:18,565
You weasely traitor fuck!
337
00:14:18,566 --> 00:14:20,734
You left money for a stolen car?
338
00:14:20,735 --> 00:14:23,336
No, no, you bought it back,
and at a premium.
339
00:14:23,337 --> 00:14:25,371
Which means technically,
you did something good!
340
00:14:25,372 --> 00:14:27,440
You left that money,
douche-tard!
341
00:14:27,441 --> 00:14:29,509
Yes, but I am your conscience,
Richard,
342
00:14:29,510 --> 00:14:31,277
so that means you did
the good thing too.
343
00:14:31,278 --> 00:14:32,911
And now, you don't have
to prove anything.
344
00:14:32,912 --> 00:14:34,213
Yeah, you cheated!
345
00:14:34,214 --> 00:14:36,315
I... I found a loophole.
346
00:14:36,316 --> 00:14:38,583
You've been asking everyone I know
347
00:14:38,584 --> 00:14:39,951
if I've ever done anything good,
348
00:14:39,952 --> 00:14:41,286
and that's the best
you can come up with?
349
00:14:41,287 --> 00:14:42,454
A fucking loophole?
350
00:14:42,455 --> 00:14:45,490
All of your posturing,
your ego-ridden tirades.
351
00:14:45,491 --> 00:14:47,325
You are really just
a scared little boy
352
00:14:47,326 --> 00:14:48,926
who has accepted his own mortality.
353
00:14:48,927 --> 00:14:50,395
Damn straight!
354
00:14:50,396 --> 00:14:52,364
All the more reason to go out
like a fucking legend.
355
00:14:52,365 --> 00:14:54,565
Richard, I don't want you to die.
356
00:14:54,566 --> 00:14:56,467
Why the fuck do you care?
357
00:14:56,468 --> 00:14:58,302
No one else does.
358
00:14:58,303 --> 00:15:00,304
Now fuck off, I got a record to break.
359
00:15:08,180 --> 00:15:10,213
You double-checked
the map?
360
00:15:10,214 --> 00:15:12,114
Verified the route twice, buddy.
361
00:15:12,115 --> 00:15:14,517
Should be able to beat Kyle's
record by a full 10 minutes.
362
00:15:14,518 --> 00:15:16,586
Give or take 10 minutes.
363
00:15:16,587 --> 00:15:17,953
Hell, yeah.
364
00:15:17,954 --> 00:15:20,890
She is good to go, buddy!
365
00:15:20,891 --> 00:15:23,726
How about one for the road?
366
00:15:23,727 --> 00:15:25,360
Hells yeah!
367
00:15:29,666 --> 00:15:31,066
Until Stupid gets here,
368
00:15:31,067 --> 00:15:32,467
what do you say we go out and bowl?
369
00:15:32,468 --> 00:15:34,035
What the fuck is this?
370
00:15:34,036 --> 00:15:37,372
What does it look like?
It's your wake.
371
00:15:37,373 --> 00:15:39,074
A little fucking early,
don't you think?
372
00:15:39,075 --> 00:15:40,309
Most assuredly not!
373
00:15:40,310 --> 00:15:43,611
Your impending foolish death
is almost certain.
374
00:15:43,612 --> 00:15:45,879
And it has reunited our family,
Mr. Fitzpatrick.
375
00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:48,482
Could someone translate
for Pardeep over here?
376
00:15:48,483 --> 00:15:50,651
We delivered the car parts to you!
377
00:15:50,652 --> 00:15:53,721
So you could complete
your moving coffin of steel!
378
00:15:53,722 --> 00:15:55,789
Ah, there's no need to thank us.
379
00:15:55,790 --> 00:15:57,490
Your demise will be good enough.
380
00:15:57,491 --> 00:15:58,658
I made a fortune on tickets,
381
00:15:58,659 --> 00:16:01,027
thanks to your pal Larry here.
382
00:16:01,028 --> 00:16:03,463
He called up every asshole
that you've ever known.
383
00:16:03,464 --> 00:16:05,898
No, Richard, this was not my idea!
384
00:16:05,899 --> 00:16:09,135
Hey, one more word and I'll
arrest you for obstruction.
385
00:16:10,605 --> 00:16:11,538
Let's get this show on the road!
386
00:16:11,539 --> 00:16:12,706
Speech!
Speech!
387
00:16:12,707 --> 00:16:13,706
Come on!
388
00:16:13,707 --> 00:16:15,207
ALL:
Speech, speech, speech!
389
00:16:15,208 --> 00:16:16,208
Speech!
390
00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:18,644
This must be so hard for you.
391
00:16:18,645 --> 00:16:21,413
ALL:
Speech, speech, speech!
392
00:16:21,414 --> 00:16:24,750
Speech, speech!
393
00:16:24,751 --> 00:16:27,185
Ugh!
(Choking)
394
00:16:27,186 --> 00:16:30,121
(All chanting)
395
00:16:33,459 --> 00:16:34,592
I don't know what to say.
396
00:16:34,593 --> 00:16:38,463
Some asshole was telling me
that my life
397
00:16:38,464 --> 00:16:41,733
wasn't worth fuck-all
because I wasn't a nice guy.
398
00:16:41,734 --> 00:16:44,569
I figured the guy was just
full of shit,
399
00:16:44,570 --> 00:16:47,904
but now, seeing you all here,
400
00:16:47,905 --> 00:16:52,776
I... I kind of...
401
00:16:52,777 --> 00:16:56,212
Uh, Richard, Richard,
there's still time.
402
00:16:56,213 --> 00:16:58,114
Just tell them how you feel.
403
00:16:58,115 --> 00:16:59,983
Atone for your transgressions.
404
00:16:59,984 --> 00:17:01,217
You can do this!
405
00:17:01,218 --> 00:17:02,585
Look, the fact that they're all here
406
00:17:02,586 --> 00:17:05,454
means that they care about you
on some level!
407
00:17:05,455 --> 00:17:09,659
Come on!
408
00:17:09,660 --> 00:17:12,194
That's right.
409
00:17:12,195 --> 00:17:14,397
You do care!
410
00:17:14,398 --> 00:17:17,865
All of you made the trek
all the way down here.
411
00:17:17,866 --> 00:17:21,135
So let me ask you something, assholes.
412
00:17:21,136 --> 00:17:24,506
Who's going to turn up
when you kick off, huh?
413
00:17:31,146 --> 00:17:36,016
Yeah, that's what I thought.
414
00:17:36,017 --> 00:17:37,818
So guess what, fuckers?
415
00:17:37,819 --> 00:17:39,853
That means I win!
416
00:17:39,854 --> 00:17:42,723
Even when I'm being a dick,
I get all this!
417
00:17:42,724 --> 00:17:43,791
I am a fucking legend!
418
00:17:43,792 --> 00:17:44,891
Hey, fuck you!
419
00:17:44,892 --> 00:17:46,293
(All shouting)
420
00:17:46,294 --> 00:17:50,896
I'll see all you fucks at the
finish line!
421
00:17:50,897 --> 00:17:54,967
(Gunshots)
422
00:18:01,073 --> 00:18:03,608
Why aren't you at my brother's
going-to-die party?
423
00:18:03,609 --> 00:18:06,478
I'm not really in a celebrating mood.
424
00:18:06,479 --> 00:18:08,213
(Gunshot)
425
00:18:08,214 --> 00:18:09,881
Is it just me,
or is something bothering you?
426
00:18:09,882 --> 00:18:12,651
Don't worry about it.
427
00:18:12,652 --> 00:18:15,285
That'd be a lot easier if you
didn't have a gun in your hand.
428
00:18:15,286 --> 00:18:17,888
They are intimidating, aren't they?
429
00:18:17,889 --> 00:18:20,257
All that power.
430
00:18:20,258 --> 00:18:23,794
The immediacy of violence.
431
00:18:23,795 --> 00:18:26,864
Take it for a spin.
432
00:18:42,279 --> 00:18:44,347
(Gunshots)
433
00:18:44,348 --> 00:18:47,048
Ex-husband.
434
00:18:47,049 --> 00:18:49,551
Cellulite.
435
00:18:49,552 --> 00:18:51,219
And one for you, Dick.
436
00:18:55,124 --> 00:18:57,192
You know, I never met a problem
I couldn't solve with a bullet.
437
00:18:59,629 --> 00:19:02,029
Show me how to load it.
438
00:19:21,081 --> 00:19:22,816
What are you doing here?
439
00:19:22,817 --> 00:19:24,217
Just waiting to die.
440
00:19:24,218 --> 00:19:27,954
Okay, can you hurry up?
441
00:19:27,955 --> 00:19:31,224
I just got to lock up.
442
00:19:31,225 --> 00:19:33,159
I failed Richard.
443
00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:35,494
I couldn't come up with one good thing
444
00:19:35,495 --> 00:19:38,263
that he's ever done for anybody.
445
00:19:38,264 --> 00:19:40,165
Never!
446
00:19:40,166 --> 00:19:43,302
That's not true, man.
447
00:19:43,303 --> 00:19:46,672
Fitzy does a lot of good things.
448
00:19:46,673 --> 00:19:49,207
That time he pretended to be a cop,
449
00:19:49,208 --> 00:19:51,843
took all those drugs away
from a bunch of kids.
450
00:19:51,844 --> 00:19:53,010
And then, we ended up doing them.
451
00:19:53,011 --> 00:19:54,045
I give up!
452
00:19:54,046 --> 00:19:58,416
Okay, do animals count?
453
00:19:58,417 --> 00:20:00,718
Meghan had this pet cat.
454
00:20:00,719 --> 00:20:02,219
Orange Cat.
455
00:20:02,220 --> 00:20:03,488
Yeah, yeah, whatever.
456
00:20:03,489 --> 00:20:06,623
Ken hated that cat,
wanted to put it down.
457
00:20:06,624 --> 00:20:10,327
Fitzy sold that cat
to a talent agent in L.A.
458
00:20:10,328 --> 00:20:12,295
Ended up in a bunch of
commercials and stuff.
459
00:20:12,296 --> 00:20:16,066
Josh, you know, sometimes
when bad things happen,
460
00:20:16,067 --> 00:20:19,570
people don't tell the truth
461
00:20:19,571 --> 00:20:24,440
because a lie hurts a little less.
462
00:20:24,441 --> 00:20:28,143
Okay, first off,
463
00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:32,081
don't talk to me like I'm a retard.
464
00:20:32,082 --> 00:20:33,683
Sorry.
465
00:20:37,587 --> 00:20:38,887
And second?
466
00:20:38,888 --> 00:20:41,289
There you go again, like I'm a retard!
467
00:20:41,290 --> 00:20:44,325
I know there's a second thing, Larry!
468
00:20:44,326 --> 00:20:46,394
Just...
469
00:20:49,632 --> 00:20:52,233
Bam!
470
00:20:52,234 --> 00:20:53,701
Fitz's first paycheque,
471
00:20:53,702 --> 00:20:55,769
for selling that cat
to the talent agent.
472
00:20:59,240 --> 00:21:01,341
So, Richard really is a good person.
473
00:21:01,342 --> 00:21:03,544
My work here is done.
474
00:21:06,147 --> 00:21:08,582
Oh, no, it isn't!
475
00:21:08,583 --> 00:21:12,619
Oh, shit!
476
00:21:12,620 --> 00:21:15,421
It's Mrs. Mulroney's
brake cylinder.
477
00:21:15,422 --> 00:21:18,658
Then, why isn't it in Richard's car?
478
00:21:18,659 --> 00:21:20,727
Fucking elves!
479
00:21:24,197 --> 00:21:26,999
(Motor revving)
480
00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:29,067
(Tires screeching)
481
00:21:31,738 --> 00:21:32,871
I know a shortcut
to Dead Person's Curve.
482
00:21:32,872 --> 00:21:34,406
We can beat him there!
Go, go, go!
483
00:21:41,713 --> 00:21:46,584
It's not in the way
that you hold me
484
00:21:46,585 --> 00:21:50,721
It's not in the way
you say you care
485
00:21:50,722 --> 00:21:54,491
It's not in the way you've
been treating my friends
486
00:21:54,492 --> 00:21:56,027
Get over!
487
00:21:56,028 --> 00:22:01,031
It's not in the way
that you stay till the end
488
00:22:01,032 --> 00:22:03,499
It's not in the way you look
489
00:22:03,500 --> 00:22:04,968
Or the things that you say
that you do
490
00:22:04,969 --> 00:22:09,072
Hold the line
491
00:22:09,073 --> 00:22:11,675
Love isn't always on time
492
00:22:11,676 --> 00:22:15,510
Woah woah woah
493
00:22:15,511 --> 00:22:18,948
Hold the line
494
00:22:18,949 --> 00:22:21,550
Love isn't always on time
495
00:22:21,551 --> 00:22:23,385
He should be here by now.
496
00:22:23,386 --> 00:22:26,055
Yeah, even if he took that other
road through the Hennessy farm.
497
00:22:26,056 --> 00:22:27,923
Come to think of it,
498
00:22:27,924 --> 00:22:31,325
he'd have avoided Dead Person's
Curve altogether.
499
00:22:33,028 --> 00:22:34,195
Brakes, fuck!
500
00:22:34,196 --> 00:22:37,031
Fuck!
501
00:22:37,032 --> 00:22:38,365
(Tires screeching)
502
00:22:38,366 --> 00:22:40,334
(Crashing)
503
00:22:40,335 --> 00:22:44,505
Richard!
504
00:22:44,506 --> 00:22:46,272
No!
505
00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:03,222
14 minutes and 27 seconds.
506
00:23:03,223 --> 00:23:06,558
Fuck you, Kyle, I win!
507
00:23:06,559 --> 00:23:08,193
Richard, Richard!
508
00:23:08,194 --> 00:23:09,561
Is the car okay?
509
00:23:09,562 --> 00:23:14,066
Richard, you took an alternate
route to avoid certain death.
510
00:23:14,067 --> 00:23:18,569
No, I took a different route
'cause I do things my way!
511
00:23:18,570 --> 00:23:19,871
And you did something good, partner!
512
00:23:19,872 --> 00:23:21,039
Orange Cat!
513
00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:25,977
Yeah, that fucking cat
still owes me money.
514
00:23:25,978 --> 00:23:27,378
Let's worry about that later.
515
00:23:27,379 --> 00:23:29,080
Right now, we've still got
some living to do, mister!
516
00:23:29,081 --> 00:23:31,750
At least for another day or so.
517
00:23:31,751 --> 00:23:32,917
Oh, your shoe's untied.
518
00:23:32,918 --> 00:23:34,417
Hey, remember when we were 8?
519
00:23:34,418 --> 00:23:35,552
The bunny ears go in the rabbit hole!
520
00:23:35,553 --> 00:23:38,321
I fucking got it-- oh!
521
00:23:38,322 --> 00:23:40,257
Ugh!
522
00:23:40,258 --> 00:23:41,892
Richard?
523
00:23:41,893 --> 00:23:44,862
Fitzy? Fitzy!
524
00:23:44,863 --> 00:23:48,298
But in the end,it wasn't a blazing car crash
525
00:23:48,299 --> 00:23:51,634
that killed RichardFitzpatrick, or syphilis.
526
00:23:51,635 --> 00:23:54,303
It was his fuckingconscience.
527
00:23:54,304 --> 00:23:57,306
It's you!
528
00:24:00,744 --> 00:24:10,719
Sync & corrected by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
529
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