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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,996 --> 00:00:14,866 2 00:00:15,867 --> 00:00:17,935 Young Brockmire's known for his temper. 3 00:00:17,968 --> 00:00:19,737 Let's see if he tries to brush back the batter 4 00:00:19,771 --> 00:00:21,774 with a little chin music! 5 00:00:24,408 --> 00:00:26,077 Oh! Oh! It's coming! 6 00:00:26,111 --> 00:00:27,079 [Grunts] 7 00:00:27,112 --> 00:00:28,246 Steee-rike! 8 00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:29,612 The catcher, Brockmire, 9 00:00:29,660 --> 00:00:32,249 is gonna have to take a minute to recover from that fastball! 10 00:00:32,283 --> 00:00:34,185 Oh, Brockmire snap-throws to the first baseman, 11 00:00:34,219 --> 00:00:35,987 Brockmire, who lays down the tag, 12 00:00:36,019 --> 00:00:37,922 and Brockmire's out! 13 00:00:37,955 --> 00:00:39,071 Brockmire's out! 14 00:00:39,109 --> 00:00:40,678 [Clears throat] 15 00:00:51,035 --> 00:00:53,038 [Ball thuds] 16 00:00:53,437 --> 00:00:56,041 [Sighs] 17 00:00:56,074 --> 00:00:58,259 What time is it, Jim? 18 00:00:58,378 --> 00:01:01,879 - I-It's Tiki Time. - Mm. 19 00:01:01,913 --> 00:01:04,815 And what are the rules of Tiki Time? 20 00:01:04,849 --> 00:01:06,016 - No talking. - Mm. 21 00:01:06,050 --> 00:01:07,217 No crying. 22 00:01:07,251 --> 00:01:10,888 - And every day is paradise. - And every day is paradise. 23 00:01:10,922 --> 00:01:13,959 [Tropical music playing] 24 00:01:15,860 --> 00:01:18,297 [Sighs] 25 00:01:21,533 --> 00:01:23,400 Oh, God! 26 00:01:23,434 --> 00:01:26,238 The nails are splitting the bamboo! God damn it! 27 00:01:26,271 --> 00:01:31,242 I spent $40 on this cheap piece of shit! 28 00:01:31,275 --> 00:01:32,911 Son of a... 29 00:01:32,944 --> 00:01:34,379 Announcer: The mound at Candlestick right now 30 00:01:34,411 --> 00:01:37,014 is the loneliest place on Earth, 31 00:01:37,048 --> 00:01:40,418 and there's 33,000 people in the stadium 32 00:01:40,450 --> 00:01:43,922 and about 1 million butterflies. 33 00:01:43,955 --> 00:01:46,557 [Balls clatter] 34 00:01:46,590 --> 00:01:48,794 I can't believe it. 35 00:01:48,827 --> 00:01:51,229 I mean, I was always so diligent. 36 00:01:51,262 --> 00:01:53,064 And it's not like I was a nun. 37 00:01:53,096 --> 00:01:54,197 There were a few years back in my 20s 38 00:01:54,232 --> 00:01:57,935 where I was getting more dick than a bathhouse in 1978. 39 00:01:57,968 --> 00:02:02,006 And not one pregnancy scare. 40 00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:05,810 I just... I never imagined I would be conflicted at all. 41 00:02:05,843 --> 00:02:09,413 All right. I got... $100, $200, $345, 42 00:02:09,447 --> 00:02:11,583 and we can stop at the ATM on the way there. 43 00:02:11,616 --> 00:02:13,185 And let's definitely tip. 44 00:02:13,218 --> 00:02:14,986 Those people... they... they work hard. 45 00:02:15,018 --> 00:02:16,822 What is this? What are you doing? 46 00:02:16,854 --> 00:02:19,156 Look, I never have gotten anybody pregnant before, 47 00:02:19,190 --> 00:02:21,893 but I have paid for my share of abortions, all right? 48 00:02:21,925 --> 00:02:25,162 Just, you know, as a friend, a mentor, a pro-choice advocate, 49 00:02:25,196 --> 00:02:26,965 as a small-loan investor one time... 50 00:02:26,997 --> 00:02:28,532 Okay, Jim, slow down. 51 00:02:28,566 --> 00:02:32,370 I... am still weighing my options. 52 00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:35,840 No, please. Entirely up to you. I understand. 53 00:02:35,873 --> 00:02:37,575 I gave up my vote at ejaculation, 54 00:02:37,609 --> 00:02:39,878 so, you know, feminism, 55 00:02:39,911 --> 00:02:41,446 your body, your choice... 56 00:02:41,478 --> 00:02:44,348 all of that razzmatazz. 57 00:02:44,382 --> 00:02:46,016 Thank you. 58 00:02:46,049 --> 00:02:47,318 [Sighs] 59 00:02:49,152 --> 00:02:51,155 I just need some time to think about it. 60 00:02:51,188 --> 00:02:52,257 And you need to think about 61 00:02:52,289 --> 00:02:54,459 whether you're able to be a father. 62 00:02:55,460 --> 00:02:56,495 [Sighs] 63 00:02:56,527 --> 00:02:58,562 I'm gonna have to ask you for some numbers here, 64 00:02:58,596 --> 00:03:00,265 because right now, you're just giving me 65 00:03:00,298 --> 00:03:03,335 a whole lot of maybe homework. 66 00:03:03,367 --> 00:03:05,637 Are you asking me for abortion odds? 67 00:03:05,669 --> 00:03:07,238 I am. Yes. 68 00:03:07,271 --> 00:03:11,141 Just please, for brevity and for clarity's sake. 69 00:03:11,174 --> 00:03:14,111 Okay. Right now, I'd say... 70 00:03:14,145 --> 00:03:16,315 [Sniffles] 71 00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:21,986 ... 60/40 in favor of keeping it. 72 00:03:22,020 --> 00:03:24,055 Really? 73 00:03:24,087 --> 00:03:25,623 Wow. 74 00:03:25,657 --> 00:03:27,626 I think I might have backed you into an answer there. 75 00:03:27,658 --> 00:03:28,787 - No! - No, I think I did 76 00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:29,923 And I think we should both 77 00:03:29,928 --> 00:03:31,429 just take our time with this whole thing. 78 00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:33,497 Yes. I-I agree. 79 00:03:43,608 --> 00:03:46,111 [Door opens] 80 00:03:46,144 --> 00:03:48,212 Charles: Hey, Jim. 81 00:03:48,246 --> 00:03:50,215 What are you doing here? 82 00:03:50,247 --> 00:03:51,416 Oh, I just wanted to see 83 00:03:51,448 --> 00:03:53,584 if maybe you want to have a catch with me. 84 00:03:53,617 --> 00:03:56,321 Like, with, um, a Frisbee or... ? 85 00:03:56,353 --> 00:03:58,422 Uh, no, like with a baseball, Charles. 86 00:03:58,455 --> 00:03:59,352 - Ah. - It's time you learned the very 87 00:03:59,361 --> 00:04:00,319 basics of the game 88 00:04:00,324 --> 00:04:02,060 that you watch every single day. 89 00:04:02,092 --> 00:04:03,929 Yeah. Sure. 90 00:04:03,961 --> 00:04:05,996 - Yeah. I'm down. - Great. Great. 91 00:04:06,030 --> 00:04:07,331 - Charles? - Yeah? 92 00:04:07,365 --> 00:04:08,967 How about you go wash your hands first? 93 00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:11,102 Okay. I'm gonna go... 94 00:04:11,134 --> 00:04:13,405 I'm gonna go do that. 95 00:04:20,978 --> 00:04:22,947 Women! Get out of here. 96 00:04:22,980 --> 00:04:24,917 Well, wonders never cease. 97 00:04:26,551 --> 00:04:28,353 - [Grunts] - Wow. That hurt? 98 00:04:28,385 --> 00:04:29,653 Ah. 99 00:04:29,686 --> 00:04:31,655 - It's... - You're not playing tag with it. 100 00:04:31,688 --> 00:04:34,426 You just... just open your mitt and watch it go in there. 101 00:04:34,458 --> 00:04:35,739 Why are we doing this? 102 00:04:35,794 --> 00:04:38,395 Every boy has to at least know how to play catch. 103 00:04:38,429 --> 00:04:40,138 - Why? - Because you're an American, 104 00:04:40,177 --> 00:04:41,177 God damn it. 105 00:04:41,232 --> 00:04:42,633 This is how the game continues. 106 00:04:42,667 --> 00:04:44,536 It gets passed down through generations, 107 00:04:44,568 --> 00:04:48,205 fathers patiently teaching their sons, et cetera. 108 00:04:49,607 --> 00:04:51,342 Oh. My God. 109 00:04:51,376 --> 00:04:54,111 Y-You throw like a blind baby waving bye-bye. 110 00:04:54,145 --> 00:04:55,412 What was that? 111 00:04:55,446 --> 00:04:57,147 Are you sure you're right-handed? 112 00:04:57,181 --> 00:05:00,185 I'm... I-I think so. 113 00:05:00,217 --> 00:05:02,287 Look, my father taught me how to throw a baseball. 114 00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:05,457 It was about the best 10 minutes we ever spent. 115 00:05:08,059 --> 00:05:10,027 Getting closer, getting closer. 116 00:05:10,061 --> 00:05:13,131 Mm. I see what this is. 117 00:05:13,164 --> 00:05:15,265 You're trying to work out your father issues on me. 118 00:05:15,299 --> 00:05:16,633 No, I'm not. 119 00:05:16,667 --> 00:05:18,570 I couldn't give two shits about that asshole. 120 00:05:18,602 --> 00:05:21,739 He spent my entire chi... 121 00:05:21,772 --> 00:05:23,674 He spent my entire childhood 122 00:05:23,708 --> 00:05:27,145 building a Tiki bar in our backyard 123 00:05:27,177 --> 00:05:29,547 so he could just drink alone. 124 00:05:29,580 --> 00:05:31,383 I'm nothing like that idiot. 125 00:05:31,415 --> 00:05:33,550 You sure? You're a raging alcoholic, 126 00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:35,152 and you spent the last 10 years of your life 127 00:05:35,186 --> 00:05:36,688 in tropical Southeast Asia. 128 00:05:36,720 --> 00:05:39,656 Uh, let's dial it down, okay, Dr. Joyce Brothers. 129 00:05:39,689 --> 00:05:41,658 We're not trying to work on my daddy issues here. 130 00:05:41,691 --> 00:05:43,360 We're working on yours. 131 00:05:43,393 --> 00:05:45,295 - I thought you wanted a father figure. - For sure. 132 00:05:45,328 --> 00:05:47,664 I barely see my dad now 'cause of the divorce, 133 00:05:47,698 --> 00:05:50,135 and my stepdad's a hard-ass, 134 00:05:50,167 --> 00:05:53,270 but you're the last person I'd peg as my father figure. 135 00:05:53,304 --> 00:05:55,407 Kind of thought I already was. 136 00:05:55,439 --> 00:05:57,374 Mm. 137 00:05:57,407 --> 00:05:59,044 You think I'd be a good father? 138 00:05:59,076 --> 00:06:01,578 It would be mean of me to say 139 00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:05,516 you'd be a bad father, but... 140 00:06:05,549 --> 00:06:07,585 I'm willing to be mean to make sure you never procreate. 141 00:06:07,618 --> 00:06:10,755 Yeah, you would be a terrible father. Don't do that. 142 00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:13,223 Never mind, all right? Let's just play catch. 143 00:06:13,256 --> 00:06:15,793 Now, just get ready. Keep your glove open. 144 00:06:15,826 --> 00:06:17,728 - Just watch it go... - This is boring. 145 00:06:17,761 --> 00:06:20,464 - What else do you have to do? - You saw me up there. 146 00:06:20,498 --> 00:06:21,498 I am 17, 147 00:06:21,532 --> 00:06:23,768 and porn is literally endless on the Internet. 148 00:06:23,801 --> 00:06:26,805 Sometimes, I just put in a random body part 149 00:06:26,837 --> 00:06:28,472 to see if someone's thought to put a dick in it. 150 00:06:28,506 --> 00:06:29,741 They always have. 151 00:06:29,773 --> 00:06:31,742 Baseball can't compete with pornography! 152 00:06:31,775 --> 00:06:34,746 I mean, nothing can. 153 00:06:34,779 --> 00:06:37,348 Oh, fine. Go jerk off. 154 00:06:37,381 --> 00:06:40,184 Beat it! Literally. 155 00:06:40,217 --> 00:06:42,753 Let me know if you need me to send you any links! 156 00:06:42,787 --> 00:06:45,222 Well, don't leave your... Oh, man. 157 00:06:47,325 --> 00:06:48,493 [Sighs] 158 00:06:48,525 --> 00:06:51,328 Brockmire known for his temper. 159 00:06:51,361 --> 00:06:53,431 Let's see if he brushes back this batter 160 00:06:53,463 --> 00:06:55,894 with a little bit of chin music! 161 00:06:55,900 --> 00:06:56,965 [Grunts] 162 00:06:56,997 --> 00:06:59,571 Oh, he does. Oh, my goodness. 163 00:06:59,604 --> 00:07:02,441 He put the fear of God into Jenkins there. 164 00:07:05,309 --> 00:07:07,679 [Country music playing] 165 00:07:07,712 --> 00:07:10,248 Mmm. 166 00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:11,648 Mmm. 167 00:07:11,681 --> 00:07:13,217 Mm. 168 00:07:13,251 --> 00:07:17,554 Can I have like, um... 169 00:07:17,587 --> 00:07:19,556 a seltzer water? 170 00:07:19,590 --> 00:07:22,393 What's going on? Are you sick? 171 00:07:22,426 --> 00:07:24,830 Oh, my God. Do you have cancer? 172 00:07:28,566 --> 00:07:31,268 I don't mean for this to sound judgmental in any way, 173 00:07:31,301 --> 00:07:33,237 but, um... 174 00:07:33,270 --> 00:07:35,530 You've had an abortion, right? 175 00:07:35,569 --> 00:07:37,307 Oh, yeah! Yeah. 176 00:07:37,340 --> 00:07:38,575 And it wasn't easy. 177 00:07:38,609 --> 00:07:40,277 No, it seems like a really hard choice. 178 00:07:40,311 --> 00:07:42,640 No, the choice was easy. 179 00:07:42,646 --> 00:07:45,352 Getting the procedure done was the hard part. 180 00:07:45,472 --> 00:07:46,794 So, at first, I couldn't go 181 00:07:46,834 --> 00:07:48,453 to the Planned Parenthood in town 'cause it burned down. 182 00:07:48,486 --> 00:07:51,945 [Laughing] I heard they had an accident when I fire-bombed the place. 183 00:07:52,072 --> 00:07:53,273 [Chuckles] 184 00:07:53,305 --> 00:07:55,209 You burned down a Planned Parenthood? 185 00:07:55,242 --> 00:07:57,011 [Laughs] Yeah. 186 00:07:57,043 --> 00:07:58,311 Okay, anyways. 187 00:07:58,344 --> 00:07:59,279 That meant I had to pay 188 00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:01,247 for a round-trip bus ticket to Pittsburgh, 189 00:08:01,281 --> 00:08:03,150 plus the cost of three nights at the hotel, 190 00:08:03,183 --> 00:08:04,183 plus the cost of the surgery. 191 00:08:04,218 --> 00:08:06,420 Sweetie, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. 192 00:08:06,452 --> 00:08:07,587 Oh, that's not the worst part. 193 00:08:07,620 --> 00:08:09,555 When I walked into the clinic, 194 00:08:09,589 --> 00:08:11,791 the protestors screamed the worst things 195 00:08:11,824 --> 00:08:13,560 humanly possible in my face, 196 00:08:13,593 --> 00:08:16,363 but it was fine 'cause I was listening to "Shake It Off." 197 00:08:16,396 --> 00:08:19,800 And then somebody threw a diaper full of rocks at me. 198 00:08:19,832 --> 00:08:22,235 - What?! - That I couldn't shake off. 199 00:08:22,269 --> 00:08:23,658 What... What about the procedure? 200 00:08:23,698 --> 00:08:25,438 Oh! That was easy. 201 00:08:25,471 --> 00:08:27,073 You know, they just knocked me out, like pbht! 202 00:08:27,106 --> 00:08:28,674 And sure, when I woke up, I felt like shit 203 00:08:28,707 --> 00:08:30,810 and I had black eye from the rock diaper, but... 204 00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:32,546 [Chuckles] Would I do it again? 205 00:08:32,579 --> 00:08:35,449 Yeah. I did. 206 00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:38,052 Jesus, I don't think I can go through that. 207 00:08:38,084 --> 00:08:39,352 Wait. 208 00:08:39,458 --> 00:08:41,355 (Mouths words) 209 00:08:44,356 --> 00:08:47,060 So I'm... I'm deciding what to do. 210 00:08:47,093 --> 00:08:49,328 I'm raising this town up on my back 211 00:08:49,361 --> 00:08:50,697 with pure womanly strength. 212 00:08:50,730 --> 00:08:55,168 Maybe... Maybe I could raise a baby, too. 213 00:08:55,202 --> 00:08:58,855 Jules, I... love you. 214 00:08:58,910 --> 00:09:01,308 I love you, too, sweetheart. 215 00:09:01,341 --> 00:09:03,409 ... as a boss. 216 00:09:03,442 --> 00:09:06,679 Um... this just feels like a super, like, 217 00:09:06,712 --> 00:09:09,750 personal conversation for, like, "workplace environment." 218 00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:12,219 You just told me every intimate detail of your abortion. 219 00:09:12,251 --> 00:09:13,586 I tell everybody that story! 220 00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:15,288 It's the first thing in my dating profile. 221 00:09:15,322 --> 00:09:17,091 - She tells everybody. - Dale knows. [Chuckles] 222 00:09:17,124 --> 00:09:19,159 This just feels like the sort of thing you want to discuss, 223 00:09:19,192 --> 00:09:21,461 like, maybe with friend, you know? 224 00:09:21,495 --> 00:09:24,097 You do have friends, right? 225 00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:25,365 Of course I have friends. 226 00:09:25,398 --> 00:09:27,301 - Yeah, you do! - [Both laugh] 227 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:28,334 I have a lot of friends. 228 00:09:28,369 --> 00:09:30,437 I just... You know, they just moved away from... 229 00:09:30,470 --> 00:09:31,772 from Morristown. 230 00:09:31,804 --> 00:09:34,207 - Yeah. - They're in Butler Heights now. 231 00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:38,111 I mean, I have a lot of friends that's... 232 00:09:38,144 --> 00:09:39,645 Oh, D-Diana! 233 00:09:39,678 --> 00:09:41,247 Diana is one of my frie... 234 00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:43,851 Ahh! Ooh-ooh! [Laughs] 235 00:09:43,884 --> 00:09:45,519 I can't believe you're pregnant! 236 00:09:45,552 --> 00:09:46,687 [Gasps] Oh! 237 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:48,255 Oh, man. 238 00:09:48,288 --> 00:09:50,657 You really snuck that one in under the wire. 239 00:09:50,689 --> 00:09:52,325 [Laughs] 240 00:09:52,359 --> 00:09:54,428 So, who's the father? Is he cute? Is he blonde? 241 00:09:54,461 --> 00:09:56,663 Tall? Blue eyes? I know what you like. 242 00:09:56,696 --> 00:09:57,663 [Laughs] 243 00:09:57,697 --> 00:10:00,868 I think I still have some prenatal vitamins left. 244 00:10:00,900 --> 00:10:02,535 [Laughs] 245 00:10:02,568 --> 00:10:04,637 Oh, and Mae has outgrown all of her newborn clothes, 246 00:10:04,670 --> 00:10:05,838 so I can give those to you now. 247 00:10:05,871 --> 00:10:08,608 And look, everyone's gonna warn you how painful birth is, 248 00:10:08,641 --> 00:10:10,309 and they are totally right. 249 00:10:10,342 --> 00:10:12,279 The first one is always horrendous, 250 00:10:12,312 --> 00:10:14,548 but by the third one, she just pbht! 251 00:10:14,581 --> 00:10:15,883 Right out of my vagina. 252 00:10:15,915 --> 00:10:17,723 - Diana... - It was like a trap door opened, 253 00:10:17,803 --> 00:10:18,712 and she just slid out... 254 00:10:18,717 --> 00:10:20,302 - [Laughs] - I don't know if I'm gonna keep 255 00:10:20,389 --> 00:10:21,389 this baby. 256 00:10:26,638 --> 00:10:27,840 Really? 257 00:10:27,873 --> 00:10:29,842 You don't have any white wine, do you? 258 00:10:29,874 --> 00:10:33,645 Jules... 259 00:10:33,678 --> 00:10:36,481 This baby is your sign... 260 00:10:36,514 --> 00:10:39,384 to let go of the past and embrace change. 261 00:10:39,417 --> 00:10:40,686 Parenthood isn't a prison. 262 00:10:40,719 --> 00:10:43,522 It actually... frees parts of yourself 263 00:10:43,555 --> 00:10:45,458 you didn't even know were there. 264 00:10:46,691 --> 00:10:49,161 [Child shrieking] 265 00:10:49,194 --> 00:10:51,497 - What is that? - The princess is up. 266 00:10:51,529 --> 00:10:52,831 Oh, goody! 267 00:10:52,864 --> 00:10:54,365 Ooh! 268 00:10:54,398 --> 00:10:56,368 Oh! 269 00:10:56,401 --> 00:10:57,603 Can you show her how you walk? 270 00:10:57,636 --> 00:10:59,505 [Gasps] Good job. Say hi to Jules! 271 00:10:59,537 --> 00:11:01,773 Oh! 272 00:11:01,806 --> 00:11:03,209 Say hi to Jules! 273 00:11:03,242 --> 00:11:05,244 [Shrieking] 274 00:11:05,277 --> 00:11:06,479 Do you want to say hi to Jules? 275 00:11:06,512 --> 00:11:08,247 [Shrieks] 276 00:11:08,279 --> 00:11:09,447 Oh! She likes you! 277 00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:12,117 - High five! - [Shrieks] 278 00:11:15,320 --> 00:11:17,656 Jose, finish your science project, okay? 279 00:11:17,689 --> 00:11:20,259 Carmina, mi Amor. Come on. 280 00:11:20,292 --> 00:11:23,229 55 times 6 is not 300. Try again. 281 00:11:23,262 --> 00:11:26,799 Ransom, break a leg in the play tomorrow. 282 00:11:26,831 --> 00:11:28,299 Marco. Marco? 283 00:11:28,332 --> 00:11:30,235 Marco: Polo! 284 00:11:30,268 --> 00:11:33,772 [Laughs] Mijo! 285 00:11:33,805 --> 00:11:35,407 Okay, Daddy's got to go, okay? 286 00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:37,475 I love you. [Smooches] I love you. [Smooches] 287 00:11:37,508 --> 00:11:39,411 I love you. [Smooches] I love you. [Smooches] 288 00:11:39,444 --> 00:11:41,180 I love you. [Smooches] I love you. [Smooches] 289 00:11:41,213 --> 00:11:44,316 I love you. [Smooches] I love you. [Smooches] 290 00:11:44,349 --> 00:11:46,285 Okay, Jim. 291 00:11:46,317 --> 00:11:48,653 You're a pretty big part of your kids' lives there, huh? 292 00:11:48,686 --> 00:11:50,556 [Scoffs] Uribe talks to them all the time. 293 00:11:50,589 --> 00:11:53,359 And since there's 13 of them, it takes a lot of work. 294 00:11:53,392 --> 00:11:56,528 So, do you... do you love being a dad? 295 00:11:56,561 --> 00:11:57,863 Eh, mas o menos. 296 00:11:57,896 --> 00:11:59,832 Mostly, I hate wearing condoms. 297 00:11:59,864 --> 00:12:03,168 Why wear a saddle when you like to feel the horse? 298 00:12:03,201 --> 00:12:06,638 Because some horses... they have Gonorrhea. 299 00:12:06,672 --> 00:12:09,707 Gonorrhea is worth it, man, to spread your legacy. 300 00:12:09,740 --> 00:12:12,577 Look. Think about it this way. 301 00:12:12,610 --> 00:12:15,446 Every human body is a... is a DNA machine 302 00:12:15,479 --> 00:12:16,916 designed to reproduce. 303 00:12:16,949 --> 00:12:21,387 Inside of you is a... is a genetic coding 304 00:12:21,420 --> 00:12:23,722 that goes back billions of years. 305 00:12:23,754 --> 00:12:24,923 [Speaks Spanish] 306 00:12:24,956 --> 00:12:27,192 And who are you to break that chain? 307 00:12:27,225 --> 00:12:29,662 Boy. I never thought about my jizz 308 00:12:29,695 --> 00:12:31,931 in terms of geological time. 309 00:12:31,964 --> 00:12:33,666 [Scoffs] One of Uribe's baby mamas 310 00:12:33,699 --> 00:12:36,402 is an Anthropology tenure professor 311 00:12:36,435 --> 00:12:38,369 at Howard University. 312 00:12:38,402 --> 00:12:39,872 [Speaks Spanish] 313 00:12:39,904 --> 00:12:41,606 [Gasps] 314 00:12:41,639 --> 00:12:43,741 With an ass that you could just bury your face like that. 315 00:12:43,774 --> 00:12:46,745 Br-Br-Br-Br! 316 00:12:48,513 --> 00:12:49,547 [Knock on door] 317 00:12:49,580 --> 00:12:51,584 - Who is it? - Brockmire. 318 00:12:51,617 --> 00:12:53,953 Just shut up. Let me talk. 319 00:12:53,985 --> 00:12:56,422 After Lucy, I did not want to have kids. 320 00:12:56,455 --> 00:12:57,956 I just... I didn't want to bring a child 321 00:12:57,989 --> 00:12:59,557 into a world this cold, you know? 322 00:12:59,590 --> 00:13:01,493 But then I met you, darling, 323 00:13:01,526 --> 00:13:03,929 and every day feels like a warm, sunny afternoon to me, 324 00:13:03,961 --> 00:13:05,830 so, I don't know. 325 00:13:05,864 --> 00:13:08,968 I just figure anything half-you can't be all bad, right? 326 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:10,835 I want to terminate the pregnancy. 327 00:13:10,869 --> 00:13:12,638 Oh, Thank you, God. Seriously. 328 00:13:12,671 --> 00:13:14,506 - Thank you. - I went to see my friend Diana, 329 00:13:14,538 --> 00:13:16,641 and she has this cute, little, fat angel baby, 330 00:13:16,675 --> 00:13:18,377 and... 331 00:13:18,410 --> 00:13:20,779 I sat her in my lap and I stared into her eyes 332 00:13:20,811 --> 00:13:23,514 and I just... I... 333 00:13:23,547 --> 00:13:25,750 I felt nothing. 334 00:13:25,783 --> 00:13:27,785 If that slice of heaven didn't give me a kick 335 00:13:27,819 --> 00:13:31,623 to the Utes, I don't want to be a mom. 336 00:13:31,657 --> 00:13:35,261 Anyway, the team is my baby. 337 00:13:35,293 --> 00:13:38,930 And... in a way... 338 00:13:38,964 --> 00:13:41,800 you and I are raising it together. 339 00:13:41,832 --> 00:13:43,401 [Chuckles] Well... 340 00:13:43,435 --> 00:13:47,272 Look, we really dodged a bullet with my DNA, anyway. 341 00:13:47,306 --> 00:13:49,541 - [Laughs] - Seriously. Alcoholism, drug addiction, 342 00:13:49,574 --> 00:13:51,844 and this voice are all hereditary, for both sexes. 343 00:13:51,877 --> 00:13:53,946 - [Laughs] - No, every single one of my aunts 344 00:13:53,979 --> 00:13:56,949 was in a barbershop quartet, so... 345 00:13:56,981 --> 00:14:00,051 - [Both chuckle] - Yeah. 346 00:14:00,085 --> 00:14:03,955 We're gonna have to go to Pittsburgh for the procedure. 347 00:14:03,989 --> 00:14:05,824 Yeah! Road trip, baby! 348 00:14:05,856 --> 00:14:07,025 A little less enthusiasm. 349 00:14:07,058 --> 00:14:08,626 Sorry. Just... Road trip. 350 00:14:08,660 --> 00:14:10,062 Road trip. 351 00:14:10,095 --> 00:14:12,264 No baby. 352 00:14:14,808 --> 00:14:17,245 And you understand all the risks 353 00:14:17,278 --> 00:14:18,779 in terminating a pregnancy? 354 00:14:18,812 --> 00:14:21,215 Actually, I have a question. Is this like batteries? 355 00:14:21,247 --> 00:14:23,650 Do we have to bring it to the recycling center afterwards? 356 00:14:23,683 --> 00:14:24,718 [Laughs] 357 00:14:28,289 --> 00:14:29,624 I'm joking. 358 00:14:29,657 --> 00:14:31,259 You probably get that kind of thing a lot, right? 359 00:14:31,292 --> 00:14:34,394 You know... we really don't. 360 00:14:34,428 --> 00:14:36,297 Okay. 361 00:14:36,330 --> 00:14:38,633 How soon can we schedule the procedure? 362 00:14:42,736 --> 00:14:45,806 That is the procedure. 363 00:14:45,838 --> 00:14:49,276 Based on your ultrasound, you're not yet seven weeks, 364 00:14:49,309 --> 00:14:51,545 so a D&C isn't recommended. 365 00:14:51,578 --> 00:14:55,282 You know, I... Pills are really hard for me. 366 00:14:55,316 --> 00:14:56,817 I'm more of a [Sniffs] type of girl. 367 00:14:56,850 --> 00:14:58,952 Please don't use a cocaine gesture in front of me. 368 00:14:58,986 --> 00:15:01,355 - I'm a doctor. - Sorry. 369 00:15:01,388 --> 00:15:02,723 I just want to make sure 370 00:15:02,755 --> 00:15:04,759 that you two have really thought this through. 371 00:15:04,792 --> 00:15:06,661 It's a serious decision. 372 00:15:06,693 --> 00:15:08,295 There are no take-backs. 373 00:15:08,328 --> 00:15:09,829 - No, please. We totally get that. - Yeah. 374 00:15:09,862 --> 00:15:11,765 No, trust me. I have thought about this long and hard, 375 00:15:11,798 --> 00:15:15,502 and this is what's best for us. 376 00:15:15,535 --> 00:15:16,736 And for everyone else. [Chuckles] 377 00:15:16,769 --> 00:15:18,706 The world has enough barbershop quartets. 378 00:15:18,739 --> 00:15:19,774 [Chuckles] 379 00:15:22,409 --> 00:15:25,846 Okay. So. 380 00:15:25,879 --> 00:15:29,584 I want you to take... one pill now 381 00:15:29,616 --> 00:15:33,987 and the other within 8 to 12 hours. 382 00:15:34,020 --> 00:15:35,822 - Now? - Yes. 383 00:15:35,856 --> 00:15:38,391 - Like, right here? - Right now. 384 00:15:38,424 --> 00:15:39,859 Okay. 385 00:15:39,893 --> 00:15:41,862 - All right. - Okay. 386 00:15:41,894 --> 00:15:44,298 - No warming up in the bullpen. - [Chuckles] 387 00:15:48,901 --> 00:15:50,737 - Here we go. - Yep. 388 00:15:55,308 --> 00:15:56,644 [Gags] 389 00:15:56,677 --> 00:15:58,479 Jim: You okay? 390 00:15:58,511 --> 00:15:59,479 Mm-hmm. 391 00:15:59,513 --> 00:16:01,015 [Gags] 392 00:16:01,048 --> 00:16:03,484 Is there some... some other way we could give it to her? 393 00:16:03,516 --> 00:16:04,651 No. 394 00:16:04,684 --> 00:16:07,721 [Pill crunching] 395 00:16:11,792 --> 00:16:14,795 It's okay to chew it? 396 00:16:14,827 --> 00:16:17,332 No. 397 00:16:22,303 --> 00:16:24,272 - Ah. Okay. - Good? 398 00:16:24,304 --> 00:16:27,341 [Upbeat music plays] 399 00:16:30,943 --> 00:16:32,947 Pre-gaming this abortion, darling... 400 00:16:32,980 --> 00:16:35,015 it was the best idea that you ever had. 401 00:16:35,048 --> 00:16:36,817 Jules: I know. 402 00:16:36,850 --> 00:16:38,819 I've been cutting back so much. 403 00:16:38,851 --> 00:16:40,387 Now we have to celebrate. 404 00:16:40,420 --> 00:16:42,822 Oh, I agree. [Sniffles] 405 00:16:42,856 --> 00:16:45,025 And don't mind if I do! 406 00:16:52,533 --> 00:16:55,369 Ooh, that's got a kick. 407 00:16:55,401 --> 00:16:57,570 [Sniffles] Oh, what the hell? 408 00:16:57,604 --> 00:16:59,907 What the hell? 409 00:16:59,939 --> 00:17:01,841 [Sniffing] 410 00:17:01,875 --> 00:17:03,844 [Groaning] 411 00:17:03,876 --> 00:17:06,479 - Ooh! - Okay. 412 00:17:06,513 --> 00:17:08,949 Hello! 413 00:17:08,981 --> 00:17:10,918 - [Chuckles] - Baby! Oh! 414 00:17:10,951 --> 00:17:12,420 - Thoughtful. - Mm-hmm. 415 00:17:12,452 --> 00:17:13,853 Look at how nice that is. 416 00:17:13,887 --> 00:17:15,489 Cheers. 417 00:17:15,522 --> 00:17:17,858 Let's do this. 418 00:17:17,890 --> 00:17:20,093 - Yeah. - Wait, where's my pill? 419 00:17:20,127 --> 00:17:22,029 I don't know. Where is your pill? 420 00:17:22,062 --> 00:17:24,698 I chopped it up so I could toot it. 421 00:17:24,732 --> 00:17:27,902 You know I don't like swallowing lumps of medicine. 422 00:17:28,502 --> 00:17:31,539 [Distorted music plays] 423 00:17:34,541 --> 00:17:36,644 You snorted my abortion. 424 00:17:36,677 --> 00:17:38,446 Oh! Oh, you should know better than to... 425 00:17:38,478 --> 00:17:40,347 First of all, greedy! 426 00:17:40,380 --> 00:17:42,416 Second of all, are you freaking kidding me? 427 00:17:42,448 --> 00:17:43,750 All right, all right, all right. 428 00:17:43,784 --> 00:17:45,119 Okay, I'm... I'm gonna die, right? 429 00:17:45,151 --> 00:17:46,821 - Am I gonna die? - I don't know. 430 00:17:46,853 --> 00:17:48,088 Am I going to die? 431 00:17:48,121 --> 00:17:49,890 - I don't know! - Well, let's find out. 432 00:17:49,922 --> 00:17:52,492 Oh, my God. Oh! 433 00:17:52,525 --> 00:17:54,562 What should we do? All right. 434 00:17:54,594 --> 00:17:55,929 What are we gonna do? 435 00:17:55,963 --> 00:17:58,899 Okay, it burns. I... [Stammers] Oh, it burns. 436 00:17:58,931 --> 00:18:00,367 Thank you so much for coming in. 437 00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:02,035 Yeah, of course. 438 00:18:02,069 --> 00:18:05,106 In case of emergency, I'm always happy to help. 439 00:18:08,809 --> 00:18:10,611 So, what happened? Something wrong? 440 00:18:12,579 --> 00:18:15,416 Jim: All right, suppose just hypothetically... 441 00:18:15,448 --> 00:18:17,784 What if I took one of her pills by mistake? 442 00:18:17,818 --> 00:18:20,020 Would that... What would happen? 443 00:18:20,053 --> 00:18:22,390 I have no idea. That's never happened before. 444 00:18:22,422 --> 00:18:25,125 I guess you're going to experience the same symptoms. 445 00:18:25,159 --> 00:18:29,530 Nausea, cramping, spotting... hypothetically. 446 00:18:29,563 --> 00:18:31,564 I just don't know from where. 447 00:18:31,598 --> 00:18:33,568 Could I just get another pill, please? 448 00:18:34,967 --> 00:18:38,773 [Sighs] 449 00:18:40,707 --> 00:18:42,943 Then we'll be out of your hair. 450 00:18:42,976 --> 00:18:46,546 I want you to take that in front of me. 451 00:18:46,580 --> 00:18:48,682 [Water pours] 452 00:18:48,715 --> 00:18:51,785 No problem. 453 00:18:51,819 --> 00:18:54,055 - Can we move this along a little bit? - Yep. 454 00:18:56,727 --> 00:18:58,825 [Gags] 455 00:18:58,859 --> 00:19:01,862 [Coughs] 456 00:19:05,131 --> 00:19:07,834 [Coughs] 457 00:19:08,968 --> 00:19:10,770 I did it. [Chuckles] 458 00:19:10,803 --> 00:19:14,675 It just... It just... smoothly went down. 459 00:19:14,707 --> 00:19:16,944 - [Sighs] - Thank God. 460 00:19:16,976 --> 00:19:19,447 Now you can leave. 461 00:19:19,479 --> 00:19:20,847 And never come back. 462 00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:23,184 All right. You cramping? 463 00:19:23,216 --> 00:19:26,085 - Spotting. - Oh. 464 00:19:26,119 --> 00:19:27,655 [Door opens] 465 00:19:27,688 --> 00:19:29,089 [Door closes] 466 00:19:29,121 --> 00:19:30,925 Fucking people. 467 00:19:32,159 --> 00:19:34,061 Not a pleasant 24 hours. 468 00:19:34,093 --> 00:19:36,897 Oh, I-I know what you mean. 469 00:19:36,929 --> 00:19:38,698 And apparently, I am the first man 470 00:19:38,732 --> 00:19:41,735 in medical history who can say that. 471 00:19:41,767 --> 00:19:44,838 I didn't expect you to step up and be so supportive. 472 00:19:44,871 --> 00:19:48,175 I know. I-I was surprised by that, too, but... 473 00:19:48,207 --> 00:19:49,350 What can I say? 474 00:19:49,397 --> 00:19:51,712 This is definitely the best relationship of my life, 475 00:19:51,745 --> 00:19:54,222 and... and you're my favorite person. 476 00:19:54,257 --> 00:19:55,459 [Chuckles] 477 00:19:56,015 --> 00:19:58,852 Okay, what did we learn from this? 478 00:19:58,886 --> 00:20:02,857 If I see a random line, say "No, thank you, I'm fine." 479 00:20:02,890 --> 00:20:04,158 [Laughs] No, I'm serious. 480 00:20:04,190 --> 00:20:06,125 Something positive should come out of this. 481 00:20:06,159 --> 00:20:08,228 We should... We should do something for a kid. 482 00:20:10,663 --> 00:20:12,699 Hey, how about 13 kids? 483 00:20:15,936 --> 00:20:17,737 [Laughter] 484 00:20:17,771 --> 00:20:18,973 [Speaks Spanish] 485 00:20:19,005 --> 00:20:20,975 Man, that is a lot of children. 486 00:20:25,678 --> 00:20:26,947 Yes. Corazon. 487 00:20:26,979 --> 00:20:29,549 Love you, too. [Chuckles] 488 00:20:29,582 --> 00:20:31,051 Look at this. 489 00:20:31,083 --> 00:20:33,553 We put a little, tiny bit of good into the world. 490 00:20:33,586 --> 00:20:35,956 - Mm-hmm. - [Laughs] 491 00:20:38,257 --> 00:20:40,026 Holy shit. Is that... 492 00:20:40,060 --> 00:20:41,896 That's Robbie Butler! 493 00:20:41,928 --> 00:20:43,630 - Robbie Butler? - Jim. 494 00:20:43,663 --> 00:20:44,964 The hell are you doing here, man? 495 00:20:44,997 --> 00:20:46,566 God, it's good to see you! 496 00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:48,936 - Good to see you, buddy. - What are you up to? 497 00:20:48,968 --> 00:20:50,904 Well, I'm coaching at Oklahoma State. 498 00:20:50,938 --> 00:20:52,973 - Get out of here. Well, that's fantastic! - Yeah. 499 00:20:53,005 --> 00:20:54,240 - Yeah. - My God. 500 00:20:54,274 --> 00:20:55,575 How you doing? 501 00:20:55,609 --> 00:20:57,311 Oh, you know, I'm all right. 502 00:20:57,343 --> 00:21:00,914 Hey, Robbie. I... I got to say, 503 00:21:00,947 --> 00:21:03,182 [Sighs] of all the awful things I did in my life, 504 00:21:03,216 --> 00:21:04,918 how I treated you was right up there. 505 00:21:04,951 --> 00:21:07,053 No, really. I mean, you were a good friend 506 00:21:07,086 --> 00:21:08,988 and an adequate broadcaster, and I just... 507 00:21:09,022 --> 00:21:11,992 I should have helped you out more, and, well, I'm sorry. 508 00:21:12,024 --> 00:21:14,261 Well, it's great to hear you say that, Jim. 509 00:21:14,293 --> 00:21:17,163 But, hey, listen. Before we get into our shit, um... 510 00:21:17,197 --> 00:21:19,300 I got to tell you, the reason I'm here is, uh... 511 00:21:19,332 --> 00:21:21,101 Joe Buck sent me to come talk... 512 00:21:21,133 --> 00:21:23,570 - Oh! - No fighting! 513 00:21:23,603 --> 00:21:24,837 You chose the wrong side, Butler! 514 00:21:24,870 --> 00:21:26,172 - Jim! - It's okay, kids. 515 00:21:26,206 --> 00:21:28,108 - They're just pretending! - The kids! 516 00:21:28,140 --> 00:21:30,009 They need to see what justice looks like! 517 00:21:30,043 --> 00:21:31,911 Stop it! No fighting! [Speaks Spanish] 518 00:21:31,945 --> 00:21:33,246 Right now, it looks like me 519 00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:35,843 beating the shit out of this traitor! 520 00:21:36,195 --> 00:21:40,262 Synced and corrected by Dragoniod for - www.addic7ed.com - 521 00:21:40,312 --> 00:21:44,862 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 36645

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